#everyone else... still big anxiety 🫠ðŸ«
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Anxiety
#🌙.rambles#WHEJVJDKJA I WAS RIGHT#my energy did return w school#even on four hours of sleep i woke up n#greeted my friends good morning#...and texted during class but it's just HR orientation ykyk#i've been lackinn energy to talk w ppl these days so this is ✨#i would consider these two childhood friends tho so like yh#everyone else... still big anxiety 🫠🫠#we need to know each other for a /long/ time before i can really feel comfortable opening up#there are surprising times where i'm comfortable enough to actually open up but for the majority of ppl i'm super fucking quiet#speaking of that two messenger gcs for this school year are in my message requests n i wna die#everyone's changing their nickname yk :') in big grps of ppl it really makes me anxious to stand out from the crowd#the first step is just really difficult. i can't do what i need to do bcs i just freeze in. fear or anxiety idfk#that's really stressing me out rn#n then when i say i'm ambitious i really mean that. i want to improve every aspect of my life#i want to enrich my social life and have more friends/have deeper friendships but#social anxiety for fuck's sake#in discord i'm more comfortable w talking#when i'm w others i'm comfy with that enables me to be less shy#in general i really struggle with anxiety at first :')#once you get that initial barrier down and give me a comfortable atmosphere then i feel a bit more free but#then it's either i talk a lot (i thrive in my passions or when i'm with people i love)#or i still don't. i stay more as an observer#THE PROBLEM IS. I REALLY WANT TO ENGAGE MORE IN MY LIFE#when it comes to texting it's either easier or harder for me.#n then w voice if i feel comfy talking then that's nice fr me! a lot of times i'm also anxious to unmute tho#n then in convos i typically like to tie up ends in topics so. if i get nervous then it's harder for me to#yeah talk n all. either way i find it difficult to lead in convos unless i'm not really stressing out (...which is uncommon)#in texting sometimes i deal woth a sort of writer's block so it's hard for me to get words out. voice (and esp irl) is nicer in a sense that
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Birdie advice!
First times are gonna be awkward but honestly SO fun if you have the right partner! My boyfriend(now husband!) was the first time I ever did anal and it was spur of the moment and I had intense anxiety about it leading up to it but my husband literally made me feel so comfortable and it’s still probably one of the sexiest, most intimate moments ever that I still get high off of when I think about it too much 🥵🫠. Anyways, at any age, new sexual experiences will be awkward just find a person you trust and keep communicating and I promise it’ll be a BLAST.
- Birdie🖤
first of all, you're awesome for this cause i always feel so out of the loop in a way for never experiencing anything at the same age as everyone else yk ?? but i know i'm not alone and beyond that i always feel stupid for looking for someone who won't hesitate to do anything to make me feel comfortable yk ?? i know i won't be the best and maybe he won't be either but i know that it's normal now.
my big fear now is the pain ?? because pain is one of my biggest fears (if not my biggest) and i know i will not be surviving if it hurts like a lot. my friends told me it was extremely painful and bloody and it did scare me so yeah, just trying to get through that and hoping that the universe drops a boyfriend in my life 😔
#•° jin replies <3°•#•°sweet people in my inbox°•#•°birdie nonnie°•#might remake your tag into •°big sis birdie°•
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