#everyone else... still big anxiety 🫠ðŸ«
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Anxiety
#🌙.rambles#WHEJVJDKJA I WAS RIGHT#my energy did return w school#even on four hours of sleep i woke up n#greeted my friends good morning#...and texted during class but it's just HR orientation ykyk#i've been lackinn energy to talk w ppl these days so this is ✨#i would consider these two childhood friends tho so like yh#everyone else... still big anxiety 🫠🫠#we need to know each other for a /long/ time before i can really feel comfortable opening up#there are surprising times where i'm comfortable enough to actually open up but for the majority of ppl i'm super fucking quiet#speaking of that two messenger gcs for this school year are in my message requests n i wna die#everyone's changing their nickname yk :') in big grps of ppl it really makes me anxious to stand out from the crowd#the first step is just really difficult. i can't do what i need to do bcs i just freeze in. fear or anxiety idfk#that's really stressing me out rn#n then when i say i'm ambitious i really mean that. i want to improve every aspect of my life#i want to enrich my social life and have more friends/have deeper friendships but#social anxiety for fuck's sake#in discord i'm more comfortable w talking#when i'm w others i'm comfy with that enables me to be less shy#in general i really struggle with anxiety at first :')#once you get that initial barrier down and give me a comfortable atmosphere then i feel a bit more free but#then it's either i talk a lot (i thrive in my passions or when i'm with people i love)#or i still don't. i stay more as an observer#THE PROBLEM IS. I REALLY WANT TO ENGAGE MORE IN MY LIFE#when it comes to texting it's either easier or harder for me.#n then w voice if i feel comfy talking then that's nice fr me! a lot of times i'm also anxious to unmute tho#n then in convos i typically like to tie up ends in topics so. if i get nervous then it's harder for me to#yeah talk n all. either way i find it difficult to lead in convos unless i'm not really stressing out (...which is uncommon)#in texting sometimes i deal woth a sort of writer's block so it's hard for me to get words out. voice (and esp irl) is nicer in a sense that
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Birdie advice!
First times are gonna be awkward but honestly SO fun if you have the right partner! My boyfriend(now husband!) was the first time I ever did anal and it was spur of the moment and I had intense anxiety about it leading up to it but my husband literally made me feel so comfortable and it��s still probably one of the sexiest, most intimate moments ever that I still get high off of when I think about it too much 🥵🫠. Anyways, at any age, new sexual experiences will be awkward just find a person you trust and keep communicating and I promise it’ll be a BLAST.
- Birdie🖤
first of all, you're awesome for this cause i always feel so out of the loop in a way for never experiencing anything at the same age as everyone else yk ?? but i know i'm not alone and beyond that i always feel stupid for looking for someone who won't hesitate to do anything to make me feel comfortable yk ?? i know i won't be the best and maybe he won't be either but i know that it's normal now.
my big fear now is the pain ?? because pain is one of my biggest fears (if not my biggest) and i know i will not be surviving if it hurts like a lot. my friends told me it was extremely painful and bloody and it did scare me so yeah, just trying to get through that and hoping that the universe drops a boyfriend in my life 😔
#•° jin replies <3°•#•°sweet people in my inbox°•#•°birdie nonnie°•#might remake your tag into •°big sis birdie°•
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