#every time i try it he just loses weight so now i just eat like i normally do and also fat scam every now and then
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rdr2 updates! ive spent all morning playing
i had put big boy (my big horse) away bc he was getting rlly fussy for no reason?? and so its been me and snowball (my other horse lol) against the world for a while! last time i played i had forgotten id done the valentine shootout so i couldnt swap her back out like i wanted to, but i did it today! so big boys back! i luv him sm
last time i did the valentine shootout and the strawberry breakout and we moved camp, so todays been mostly exploring. i got roped into papa fishing trip at the end of my last session (the curious couple and their unruly son 😭) which was so sweet, love arthur and dutch and hosea smmm
also at the start of this session sean wanted to go rob a house so we did! but he doesnt know im a pack rat and he kept getting pissy at me for taking so long, but like!! they had loot! and usually when i end missions the lawmen show up and i wanna get all the goodies! it was silly tho
but yeah! exploring! i got a vulture feather ages ago and have been wanting to get the seagull feather to make the lil hat accessory so todays missions were 1. go to a barber bc arthurs hair got long 0_0 2. go to the tailor in saint denis bc i LOVE that black shirt all the low honor edits use and i HAVE to have it and 3. kill a seagull lol
i got barbered, spent like 200 bucks at the tailor and have like 15 new fits lmao (unironically played arthur dress up for like an hr), and swapped snowball for big boy before coming back towards home to find a seagull. we nearly got attacked by a gator i almost ran over on the way out of town 0_0 and it was rlly scary for us both (me n big boy)
i got my feather!
AND THEN KIERAN WANTED TO GO FISHING!!!!!! and i love kieran, so we went fishing :3 hes rlly sweet and its so funny watching him interact w/ arthur when he gets all tease-y like he does. i think kieran was probs the person i talked to most back in horseshoe overlook just cuz he was like, always there and hes just so nice
also just to double back on my last sesh when we did papa fishing trip, i also ADORE trelawney, hes so goofy and i love that he just appears and everyones like bro what the fuck have u even been doing
but yeah! rdr2 going well! my goals for next sesh are to get that feather accessory made and to fat scam both myself and my horse if possible. i fat scammed myself out of being underweight but it only lets u eat n sleep so many times before it tells u to knock it off and play the game so, idk! hoping ill remember to do it more often!
#av plays#i have TRIED keeping him fed normally but i get busy or i just forget and it just doesnt work#every time i try it he just loses weight so now i just eat like i normally do and also fat scam every now and then#i also miss snowball already 😭😭 i love both my horsies
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idk just thinking about seeing your lieutenant for the first time, this big giant dog of a man, and thinking to yourself, "hmmm yeah, i'm gonna make that thing mine." (18+)
like. i'm thinking about seeing him walk into the room for the first time. fresh off an op, still in all his gear. he's angry cause he's been awake off and on for 40 hours at this point, and he sinks down into a chair in the mess hall, and your eyes bug cause the chair fucking bends with his weight.
and you're just like "omg omg omg holy shit" cause this fucking brute is just huge and beefy, and you had no idea this was your type until you watched his hand curl around a cup and make it look miniature. and you're wondering like "fuck i bet those holsters are custom made" cause you don't think you've ever seen them stretch that far around someone's thigh.
ughghghghgh, and he's dumb as shit, too, or maybe he's just fucking blind. you give him every hint in the book, every indication of how you feel other than pasting a giant neon sign on your forehead that says "fuck me."
you wear the tightest cargo pants you can get. you let the buttons on your shirts go low whenever he's near. you make excuses to see him late, delivering him paperwork in the middle of the night, meeting him out for a smoke (and he's never seen you smoke anything), shuffling your way in front of him in line so you can bump into him and graze your ass against his front. he even catches you this way--even curls his hand around your waist and steadies you before letting you go impatiently.
fuck, bending over in front of him, the obnoxious giggling, the excuses to dangle your tits in his face. you want this man underneath you, on top of you, tangled around you and suffocating you with those enormous arms, and he barely side-glances at you whenever you're in his vicinity, and it's infuriating.
what do you have to do to reel this thing in? how many bones do you have to give him?
how many times do i have to flash my bra at you for you to fuck me over your desk?!
you can't eat another cherry in front of him. you can't drop more sauce onto your cleavage. you cannot come out of the showers in just a towel in front of him anymore because you're going to lose your fucking mind--
you even made out with his beloved little sergeant, his favorite little know-it-all that can't stop blowing shit up. that blue-eyed, insufferable, yapper of a scot that kisses all wet, with teeth, who pants like a puppy when he asks if he can 'ave a taste of y'r bonnie cunt, please, please, please--
and you say yes, because maybe he'll finally fucking shut up if you drown him between your thighs and never let him come up for air.
face down, ass up, cargos around your ankles, hips pushing past against that puppy's stubble as he devours you on his knees. his big hands spread your ass for him, and his thumbs flick over your folds as he opens you up, a cackle leaving him before he opens his mouth wide and kisses your pussy all sloppy and uncoordinated.
when the door swings open and hits the wall with a bang, the puppy tries to leave. he tries to move, but you reach back and grip his mohawk, scowling as you shove his face back where it belongs as your lieutenant stands at the door and heaves with anger.
"uh uh," you snap, and your sergeant on his knees whines, his blue eyes a little foggy and wet as he blinks up at you. but he complies, his tongue slurping, and you flutter your lashes at your lieutenant as you keep johnny muzzled in your cunt. "sorry, lieutenant. is this your office? must've read the sign wrong."
you reel from the contact. a big hand grips you by the hair, slamming you down against his desk, and you choke as you try and gasp for air. like a good boy, johnny settles where he is, shoving his tongue down your hole and moaning low when he realizes you're dripping down his chin now that his lieutenant has you.
"y'think this is funny, eh?" ghost mutters in your ear. "y'think i don't know wot y'r doin'? think i 'aven't caught on, think i 'aven't noticed wot a fuckin' insatiable bloody pain in my arse you've been ever since y'got 'ere?!"
you whimper, relaxing against the desk, and ghost tugs at your hair again, shaking his head.
"oi! y'don't get to be stupid just because y'r gettin' y'r cunny played with," ghost snaps. "y'r a right headache."
you laugh, getting up to your elbows, your eyes rolling to the back of your head as ghost scruffs johnny by the base of his mohawk and cups your pussy with one big hand. you gasp, leaning your head back, because finally, yes, it's all i want, please, please, please--
"'f you wanted to be my pet so bad," ghost murmurs, fitting himself behind you, leaning over your shoulder as he spits into your ear, "all ya had to do was fuckin' ask, swee'eart."
when your eyes open, ghost hums, clicking his tongue under the mask.
"use y'r words," he growls. "be a good girl, and say wot it is y'want."
"want you," you whine, and he sighs deeply, closing his eyes, and you drown out the sounds of johnny sputtering at your feet as ghost bends you at the hip a little more, arching your back.
"mmm...tha'sit. was tha' so hard?"
#idk what this is#but i saw a pic of ghost and i had to be gross about him for a couple hundred words sorry#simon ghost riley#simon riley#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley x reader#simon riley x you#ghost mw2#ghost cod#ghost call of duty#ghost mwii#ghost x reader#cod#call of duty#simon riley smut#simon ghost riley smut#simon thoughts#ghoap x reader
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SIGNS OF AFFECTION, the portayal of love.
femreader⠀ ♡ㅤ fluffest rsㅤ───ㅤ2224wc
lee heeseung. “baby, stay with me,” heeseung all but whines, pulling on your arm in an attempt to drag you back down to his bed. his voice is hoarse from not having spoken in a while; you had been laying together in silence, the both of you doing your own thing in each other’s space.
“hee, i have to go,” you try to free yourself from his grasp and you almost succeed but once he notices that he’s losing his grip, he tugs you towards him and wraps his arms around your waist, head resting against your stomach.
“just spend the night, i don’t think your roommate will care,”
“of course she isn’t going to care but i care. i have to go study,”
he looks up, his chin pressing against your stomach, lips forming a pout as he stares at you with a pleading expression. you can’t help but smile at him, bringing a hand up to fix his tousled hair.
you like when he gets clingy like this—he’s always clingy—it’s comforting knowing that he likes your presence as much as you do his. maybe even more, considering he’s always asking you to go over or if he can hang out at your apartment even if you don’t plan on doing anything. when you ask why or propose actually doing something he laughs you off, saying that simply sitting in the same room as you is enough for him.
“study here,”
“i don’t have my stuff,”
“okay, study tomorrow then,” he sits up, removing his arms from around you. though, he keeps his hands on your waist, squeezing, “i wanna stay with you,”
you stare at him for a moment, acting as if you were debating on whether or not to give in. it was all for show, though; you’re going to give in to him every single time and he knows it. so a smug smile takes place on his lips, knowing that he’s won when you let out a sigh, shoving his shoulder lightly so that he could make room for you on his bed.
park jongseong. you search for jay’s warmth right when you wake up, eyebrows furrowing and lips turning downwards when you don’t find it. you open your eyes to see nothing, jay nowhere to be seen.
you lay in bed for a minute longer before deciding to get up and go look for him in your small apartment, but before you can even pull the covers away from your body, your boyfriend walks in.
he looks like he’s been awake for a while—you can tell he took a shower by his still damp hair and he’s already dressed, wearing simple jeans and a t-shirt. he smiles at you, “hey, sleepyhead,”
“hi… you’re up early,”
“i was making you breakfast,” you feel the bed dip from his weight as he sits next to where you’re still laying, “and i cleaned the apartment a little,”
you reach over and grab his hand, placing a kiss against his knuckles, “thank you, but you didn’t have to. it’s my apartment, i can do it myself,” despite saying that, you know he’s going to ignore you, continuing on with taking care of you, your needs, and your apartment.
he hums, but doesn’t respond verbally, instead squeezing your hand in his. the two of you sit in a comfortable silence—you trying to fully wake up and him waiting for you—for what feels like forever until he finally breaks it.
“i like doing things for you, you know?”
“do you?”
“yeah, i do. you smile at his response, lifting your head to silently ask for a kiss.
he obliges, mumbling against your lips, “you gonna get up and eat breakfast now?”
sim jaeyun. “how do you deal with jake being on top of you constantly?”
you raise your eyebrows at riki’s question, watching as the teenager throws a piece of popcorn at your boyfriend from the other end of the couch.
jake throws it back, “dude, i’m not on top of her,” except he is on top of you—his arms wrapped around your waist, head resting against your shoulder.
“uh… yeah, you are,”
the boys’ argument fades into the background as you think about riki’s question. honestly, you never noticed that jake was, in fact, always ‘on top’ of you.
you don’t mind it, obviously—you enjoy it—but now that you’re thinking back on your relationship, jake really is very physically affectionate towards you. you don’t think you can recall a time where his arms weren’t wrapped around you, or his hand holding wasn’t holding yours, or he wasn’t standing so close to you that the both of you looked like you’re glued together.
“jake,” you interrupt their argument, laughing as you poke at him cheek, “maybe you should pull away before you try and defend yourself,”
he scoffs at you in faux annoyance, doing the exact opposite of what you told him to do—he pulls you closer to him, practically forcing you onto his lap. you’re sitting sideways, your head against his shoulder now.
“nope, you’re warm,”
“i don’t think it’s cold,”
“i’m cold, though,” shrugging, he places a kiss on top of your head, “also, ki, she’s on top of me, so you’re making zero sense,”
“i just watched you move her on top of you,” riki groans, throwing a pillow at the both of you, making you laugh when the two begin arguing again, the movie you had been watching long forgotten.
park sunghoon. everyday you are beyond thankful for park sunghoon, whatever higher power there is must really like you to give you the opportunity of being his girlfriend.
the fact that he’ll wake up at 3:28AM just to go buy you some kind of snack or food is one of the things you love about the man, simply because you know almost nobody who would ever do that—unless their partner was pregnant—but he does.
“i love you, by the way,” you smile, tapping your feet in excitement against the car floor, stopping when you feel sunghoon’s hand squeeze your thigh gently.
“because i’m going to go get you an ice cream?” he turns on the blinker, stopping before turning to the right, driving to a nearby convenience store where you’re planning on getting said ice cream.
“that too, but i just love you in general,”
“yeah?” he glances at you, an eyebrow raised.
“yes,”
“good,” his thumb rubbing circles against your skin, leaving goosebumps in its wake, “i love you too, i hope you know i’d never get up this late for anyone else,”
“i hope not,” the car pulls into the convenience store’s empty—save for the singular employee’s car—parking lot, sunghoon putting the car into park. he gets out, leaving you alone in the car for a brief moment, rounding to your side and opening the door.
he leans against it, staring at you with a soft, fond smile. the look makes you nervous, your face heating up at the prolonged eye contact. it gets to be too much after a few seconds, and you reach up to cover his eyes with your hand, “okay, stop staring, you’re weird,”
he lets out a laugh, removing your hand from his eyes, “i’m weird? you’re the one who wants ice cream at three in the morning,”
“well, you still drove me here, so you’re equally as weird. you could’ve said no,”
“nope, i can’t say no to you. it’s impossible,”
he doesn’t say anything else as he grabs your hand, helping you out of the car. you’re perfectly capable of stepping out of it yourself but you let him help you, not really thinking about it—a habit that’s formed after years of dating him. you smile to yourself, the cold air of the convenience store making you shiver while you follow behind sunghoon to the small freezer section.
kim seonwoo. you smile when sunoo hands you a shopping bag, looking inside to see an album you’d been wanting for a while now. you’d only mentioned it to him once, an offhand statement that you moved on from immediately after saying it. you should’ve known sunoo was going to remember and buy it for you, even though you could have bought it yourself.
noticing something else in the bag, you move the album out of the way, your eyes widening in surprise when you see that he also bought you the phone charm you’d really wanted. you hadn’t been able to find it in any stores, though, and yet somehow sunoo did.
“those are the ones you wanted right?” his eyes go back and forth between you and the bag, watching your reaction, “i saw the charm and remembered you wanted it, so i got it. it was the last one,”
“mhm, it is, thank you,” you take it out, looking it over with a grin on your face, “you didn’t need to get the album, i could’ve bought it,”
he waves you off, “it’s fine. i just got it while i was there. you like them, though, right?”
“obviously, i like them,” you lean forward, wrapping your arms around his shoulders, embracing him. he hugs you back, placing his hands on your waist. he can’t help but let out an exasperated sigh when you continue your sentence, “but i feel bad that you’re always wasting your money,”
“i don’t waste money, it’s for a good cause. as long as you like it, angel, then who cares. i’ll get you whatever you want, it’s not a big deal,” he pulls away from you, bringing a hand up to cup your cheek, pulling you into a gentle kiss.
yang jungwon. “you look pretty in that shirt,” jungwon says, snapping yet another photo of you since you started your clothing haul. you giggle, looking at him through your mirror—he’s looking at his phone, probably scrolling through the pictures he’s taken so far.
“you don’t have to take a picture of every outfit, won,” you turn, walking over to sit next to him on your bed, “i’ll wear them again,”
“but i like taking pictures of you,” he shows you his phone, a photo of you from earlier on his screen. you hadn’t noticed him take this one—it was while you were wearing one of the first outfits you had tried on, your face in a weird expression. you assume jungwon had taken in while you were talking and you grimace when he continues speaking, “you look pretty,”
you give him a look, “i look bad in that picture,”
your boyfriend frowns, setting his phone to the side, putting your focus back on his face rather than his phone. he narrows his eyes at you, playfully glaring, “i don’t think so, you look good in every picture,”
“no,” you scoff, “you’re just saying that because you’re my boyfriend,”
“no,” he mocks you, sticking his tongue out at you. you laugh at his immaturity, moving to push his shoulder but he stops you, hand gripping onto your wrist. you pause, biting your lip to keep from laughing when you notice he’s still glaring at you, “it’s because you are pretty. so pretty that i go crazy every time i see you,”
“you’re overselling it,” you look away, feeling your face heat up at his compliments. you still aren’t used to him being so… nice. not that he was ever mean, but the constant barrage of compliments the boy gives you on a daily basis is enough to make anyone nervous.
“am not,” he gives you an offended look, letting out a huff of air, “i’m just telling the truth, lovely.”
nishimura riki. you glance to your side, stifling a giggle when riki lets out a loud groan, his feet dragging against the floor as you walk into yet another store.
you’ve been shopping for the past three hours, having gone into most of the businesses at the mall. riki, despite you telling him he didn’t have to come, tagged along but he started complaining almost immediately after you exited the third store.
“you definitely don’t have enough money to buy anything else—can we go?” he squeezes your hand, rubbing his thumb against your knuckles. the act almost makes you comply with his request.
“i told you that you didn’t have to come,”
you always tell him that he doesn’t have to go with you, whether it be to the mall or something else. every single time he insists, telling you that he’ll go with you so you don’t ‘feel lonely’, only for him to start complaining within five minutes of whatever it is that you’re doing. you know that it’s lighthearted, but you can’t help but (lovingly) roll your eyes at him every time he does this.
“i didn’t think we’d be here for five days,”
you scoff, bumping him with your shoulder while you card through a rack of t-shirts with your free hand, “you’re dramatic,”
“no, i’m not. my feet just hurt,”
humming, you pull out a shirt, scrutinizing it for a few moments before ultimately deciding to buy it, “go sit in the car then, babe,”
“uh, no,” he gives you a dirty look, grabbing the shirt from your hand so that he could hold it instead, “i came ‘cos i wanted to spend time with you, not the car.”
#ㅤ⠀ ૮꒰ ˊᗜˋ ꒱ა ♡ ㅤ⠀#enhypen x reader#enhypen x you#enhypen x y/n#enhypen fluff#enha x reader#enha x you#enha fluff#heeseung x reader#jay x reader#jake x reader#sunghoon x reader#sunoo x reader#jungwon x reader#niki x reader#riki x reader#enhypen scenarios#enhypen imagines#enhypen smau#enha scenarios#enha imagines#enha smau
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Toshiro Dungeon Meshi really said "I am an autistic man and I've suffered quietly my whole life, the way I'm supposed to, the way that's expected of me. The way you're supposed to, the way that I expect of you. It infuriates me that you don't. It envies me that you don't. I've never expressed this before because I don't know how and I snapped and all of my emotions came tumbling out and I said it in a way I don't actually mean, just like how you never mean it."
And then he said, "And then we fought. And you won, of course you did, and now we're talking openly because you're someone I CAN talk to. I always COULD talk to you. I just never DID. Of course you're taking this seriously. And you know I take it all seriously. Why are you like this? Why do I RECOIL every time you speak to me, even when you aren't doing anything wrong? How can a person even be like this?? Why do I sometimes wish that I could be like you?"
AND THEN HE SAID, "Wait. Please. I need you to know I do care about you. I can't tell you that directly because I have been taught my whole life that to love someone is to lessen their burden, to BE less of a burden, shrink yourself, don't have demands, don't have needs, don't eat more than the bare minimum to sustain yourself. I'm working on that now, because of my family, because of her, and because of you, but I still can't bring myself to settle the full weight of my being onto another person. Here is a magic bell that will let you safely become my burden. I will not lose you too."
The magic bell rolls around in Laios' bag and rings constantly because Toshiro didn't think to stuff it with a piece of paper before giving it to the most physically active fighter in the group who does all the runnining aroundening.
The one he JUST brawled for being imperceptive.
Blurting out that he would help him escape the Elf Cops took priority. He NEEDED Laios to know this so bad. I just know he was thinking about putting that bell in his hand as soon as he started sharing how he wished that he'd told Falin how much she meant to him sooner but was trying to think of the right moment. He was absolutely BESIEGED by the autistic swagger of the Touden siblings. How can you not start scratching the furniture thinking about it
#dungeon meshi#toshiro dungeon meshi#dunmeshi#toshiro#shuro#shuro dungeon meshi#i can't stop thinking about him... goddamn anon the floodgates got opened#him...#This doesn't even HAVE to be in a ship way btw I really like this in a queerplatonic or alliance flavor#but it IS a ship I respect especially with some post-canon character development#Toshiro Nakamoto
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Now That We Don't Talk
Part I
Now That We Don’t Talk - Azriel x Reader
Summary: Dealing with the aftermath of your mate’s betrayal.
Warnings: major angst, mentions of grief and loss, mention of infidelity
a/n: this has a happy ending, I promise! I’d also like to mention that I never usually blame the woman when a man cheats, but in this case, both parties knew of the existing relationship and bond so *death to all of them* lol jk…for now…I hope this lives up to your expectations!
────────────
“That’s it, Y/n,” Madja said, taking a step backwards as she carefully monitored you between two support beams. “Go slow.”
Your shoulders and arms were straining as you held yourself up using the two beams, slowly raising your foot to take another step forward. You groaned at the pain, feeling flustered and embarrassed that walking was taking you so much effort.
Cassian and Nesta had turned one of the larger chambers in the House of Wind into a physical remedial room. You had sessions in here every day with Madja, Cassian almost always there with you and in times he couldn’t be, Rhys would fly up to be with you during these.
You didn’t have the heart to tell your brother that you preferred when Rhys was here instead of him, only because he always magicked his wings away so you didn’t have to see them. Cassian’s were just a reminder of what you had lost.
Relearning to walk has been one of the hardest parts of losing your wings.
Even now it was a struggle to simply stand. You were too used to the weight of having wings on your back and using them to balance. You felt their absence in more ways than one.
But this one was easier to deal with—the physical part. It was the mental and emotional part that still kept you up at night. The loss of freedom, having to know you’d never be able to fly again. The nightmares. The embarrassment. The shame.
You had never been a particularly proud Illyrian, never agreeing with the way your people were raised and the culture they lived in. But still, having those wings made you a part of something bigger than yourself—a community, a tribe, a family.
You weren’t like Rhys, not a half-breed like him. You didn’t have the pointy ears to make you fit in with the wingless High Fae. You’d always be other to them. And now you’d be other to your people as well.
You tried to blink away the tears forming in your eyes but it didn’t matter. Your brother seemed to sense the change in your mood and rose from his chair in the corner where he had been monitoring the session.
“You’re doing great, kiddo,” Cassian said, trying to encourage you to keep trying. “One step at a time.”
“I can’t,” you choked out, your muscles straining from the effort to keep you upright. “I-I can’t.”
“You can and you will,” Cassian said, sternly. “Come on, I know you can do it.”
“I can’t.”
You wobbled, letting out a long exhale. You had only made it halfway to the other side of the mat. Pain pierced through your still healing back, serving as another reminder of what you had lost. Your fractured hip had healed already but the bones still felt like they were being grinded together every time you moved your legs.
“Thank you for your help today, Madja,” Cassian said, sharing a look with the older healer. “I can take it from here.”
Madja, as if also sensing the shift in the atmosphere, took her leave without argument to give you some privacy with your brother.
“Just make sure she eats something after this. Her body needs more nourishment,” Madja said on her way out. The noise of the door shutting behind her was all it took for the hold on your emotions to completely crumble.
You felt your legs give out as a cry escape from your throat. Cassian darted forward, catching you only just before you hit the ground. He slowly lowered you the rest of the way, going with you to hold you in a tight embrace as sobs racked your body.
“I-I can’t do this, Cass,” you cried over and over again. “I can’t do this.”
He knew you weren’t just talking about walking.
Every intake of breath reminded you of the heavy weight of your heart in your chest. It was unbearable, all consuming. The heartache, the pain, the feeling of the mating bond still lingering in the background of it all. You wanted to rip your heart out, wanted to scream and scream but all that came out were inaudible words and sobs.
“It’s going to be okay, sweetheart,” Cassian murmured, petting your hair on the back of your head. “I promise you.”
“My wings, Cass, m-my wings are gone,” you choked out, tears streaming down your face.
Cassian cradled your head in his neck, pulling you tighter against him. His own body was tense and you knew he was holding back his own emotions, trying to be strong for you. “I know, kiddo, I know.”
“M-my wings,” you cried. “My wings. I-I want them back, Cass. P-please, I want them back!”
“I would cut off my own wings and give them to you if I could, sweetheart,” Cassian whispered, his voice filled with despair. “I’m so sorry.”
He couldn’t understand this feeling, would never unless he too lost his wings. You remembered when he almost had after protecting Azriel in Hybern from the blast of the Cauldron. Azriel…Just thinking of his name was making you spiral further, choking on your own sobs.
There had once been a time when Azriel had been the one to save your wings. And now he was part of the reason why you lost them. You weren’t even sure which hurt more at this point. His betrayal or the loss of your wings.
Both felt so violating.
A piece of you, of your body, ripped away along with your trust and heart. Your mate sleeping with another female and coming home to you. Looking you in the eyes and keeping that secret from you each and every day. Making love to you knowing he was sharing himself with another behind your back. How were you supposed to move on?
It didn’t help that you weren’t fully rid of Azriel. The bond was still an unwelcomed presence inside of you, still sang his name–called for him–despite the hurt he had caused you. You wanted to tear it to shreds.
“Why?” You cried, wrapping your arms around Cassian’s neck to fall into him further. Your brother held you as tight as he could, stroking your hair, whispering words of support in your ear. “Why wasn’t I g-good enough, Cass? W-why wasn’t I enough for him? What is wrong with m-me?”
The guttural wails that came from you caused Cassian to squeeze his eyes shut, trying to keep his own tears at bay. Your chest heaved as you struggled to even breath under the crushing anguish that was consuming you. He held you as you shook, held you as your tears soaked through his shirt, held you as he restrained himself from shooting off to go find Azriel and kill him.
“There is nothing wrong with you, sweetheart. Nothing,” Cassian growled. “Azriel is a fool for losing you. He’s the fuck-up. Not you.”
“He is my mate, Cass, my mate. And he–he did this to me. Why?”
“Because he’s a miserable bastard who doesn’t know how to love,” Cassian growled.
You couldn’t even register his words over the pounding of your own wailing heart. “What did I do to deserve this?”
You felt so violated, so vulnerable, so completely and utterly shattered. The pain of your broken heart seemed to echo in the depths of your very soul. Why hadn’t you been enough for him?
Was Elain just that much better? Was she prettier, smarter, a better female? Could she give him something you couldn’t?
“You didn’t deserve this. You did nothing wrong,” Cassian murmured into your hair, kissing the top of your head. “You are so much better than them, sweetheart.”
“B-but then why wasn’t I enough?” Your cries met their crescendo, your hands shaking as you clung onto Cassian’s shirt with tight fists. “Why wasn’t I enough, Cass? Why?”
Your voice was hoarse, your words cracking as you spoke. But there was nothing left to say.
Nothing left to say at all.
You weren’t good enough for Azriel, for your own mate. You weren’t good enough to keep his attention. Not good enough to keep his love.
You were just simply not enough.
Cassian held you there as you cried and cried, held you as the weight of everything you lost engulfed you. Held you through the raw grief that surged like a tempest within you. Held you until you had cried yourself into a fitful sleep, only then rising to carry you back to your room.
────────────
As soon as Mor had gotten word about what had happened, she immediately started her journey home from the continent. She had gone to you the minute she landed in Velaris, but Cassian had turned her away because he didn’t want to interrupt your sleep, something you hadn’t gotten much of since the attack.
But that was okay because she had a few things she needed to take care of.
“Where is she!”
Mor’s shout rang through the entire house, the ground quaking underneath her as she stormed into the dining room where a very morose dinner seemed to be taking place with Rhys, Feyre, Elain and Amren at the table. Rhys shot up from his seat. “Y/n is at the House of Wind with—”
“Not her,” Mor snarled before pointing a finger at Elain, who stared at her wide-eyed. “You.”
Before anyone could stop her, Mor launched herself forward, grabbing Elain by the hair on the back of her head and slamming her face down on the wooden table she was sitting at. Rhys cursed while Feyre jumped up from her seat, thanking the Gods that Nesta wasn’t here for this.
Rhys grabbed Feyre by the arm, shaking his head at her. “Some things need to be fought the fae way. Let her learn.”
Amren leaned back in her chair, not so much as flinching at the display.
Mor kept her fist wrapped in Elain’s hair, pressing her face against the hardwood as the other girl cried out, blood dripping down her nose.
“That was for Y/n because she’s up there learning how to fucking walk again because of you,” Mor hissed before yanking Elain up by her hair until she was standing.
Elain cried out for Feyre but her sister just pressed her lips into a thin line, Rhys’s hand still around her arm. Feyre was disappointed in her sister for what she had done but she still bristled as Rhys’s amusement at the scene traveled down their bond.
Mor decked Elain in the face, the sound audible, causing Feyre to flinch. Elain’s head whipped to the side as she dropped to the floor with a loud sob. “And that was for Cassian because he would never lay his hands on a weak, pathetic female but I will. Remember that.”
Elain’s cries rung out in the room, blood dripping from her now broken nose and a bruise already forming on her cheek. Mor ignored her as she looked to Rhysand.
“Where is the other one?” Her voice was full of anger. “I’m going to fucking kill him.”
“I don’t know,” Rhys sighed, finally letting go of Feyre. She rushed to Elain’s side, helping her off the floor and out of the room, giving Mor a remorseful look, feeling guilty over what her sister had caused.
“What do you mean you don’t know?”
“He disappeared once Y/n woke up and made it very clear she didn’t wish to see him. I have no idea where he went.”
“That fucking coward,” Mor grumbled. “Why is Elain still here? This is Y/n’s home, not hers. She shouldn’t have to be the one who leaves and you know she will if those two are still around. Cassian would leave with her too—I’m sure of it.”
“I know he would,” Rhys said, sitting back down and putting his head in his hands. “I don’t know what to do, Mor. If Elain wasn’t Feyre’s sister I would’ve had her banished in a second and Azriel…Gods, he’s my brother. I can’t believe he would do something like this. He loves Y/n. I don’t know why he would hurt her like this.”
“Azriel has always been his worst enemy,” Mor sighed, sitting next to Rhys. “We’ve all tried to help him as much as we could but this just isn’t something we can help him with. Y/n is going to need our support. This could destroy her.”
“It already has,” Rhys replied. “She might leave our court regardless of whether or not we send Azriel and Elain away. I wouldn’t blame her. I’ve already let her know that if she wants out, I’ll have everything set-up for her.”
“What of the girl’s mate? The redhead,” Amren piped up, crossing her arms. “Does he know yet? You know how males are. He might call for a blood duel against Azriel.”
“Lucien has already been informed about what happened,” Rhys spoke. “Cassian has been on a warpath and was all too eager to tell Lucien. I think part of him hoped he would duel Azriel. But Lucien wouldn’t.”
“So what happens now?” Mor asked.
Rhys looked at her and she took note of the heavy bags under his eyes. He hadn’t been sleeping. Neither had she. She was certain none of them had. Azriel had caused a giant rift in this family—one felt by them all.
Rhys held back his tears, clearing his throat.
“I know what was to be done,” he breathed out. “But it’s going to be hard. He was…He was my brother for over five hundred years. Regardless of what he’s done, it’s going to be hard to say goodbye.”
Mor rested a comforting hand on his shoulder. “I know, Rhys. Nothing about this is going to be easy.”
“He cannot be trusted anymore,” Amren added. “Anyone who could cheat on their mate cannot be trusted. He might as well have spit on the Mother’s face for what he did.”
“I just want to know why. Why would he do this?”
Mor let out a long breath. “I’m not sure you’ll ever get an answer. I think Azriel, himself, can’t even answer that question.”
“I failed her, Mor. I knew how dangerous that mission was. I should’ve never given it to her,” the quiet cry shook Rhys’s body.
“Azriel was supposed to be with her, Rhys,” Mor said. “It’s not your fault. He failed her. This was his doing.”
But Rhys just shook his head, the tears finally slipping free from both of their eyes.
“Get it out now, Mor, before you see her,” Rhys choked out. “It’s…hard to see her in the state she’s in. Prepare yourself. We have to be strong for her.”
“I know,” Mor whispered, wiping at her tears. “I know.”
────────────
“Hey, kiddo,” Cassian’s voice pulled you from your sleep.
You blinked awake, groaning at the pounding in your head. It took you a second to realize you were in your room. Cassian must’ve carried you here after your breakdown yesterday.
Cassian was sitting beside you, stroking your hair. “I brought you some breakfast and someone is here to see you.”
It was only then you noticed the other person sitting at the end of your bed.
“Mor?” Your voice was hoarse, the word barely escaping. “You’re here?”
“I came back as soon as I heard,” Mor said, leaning forward to clutch your hand in hers. “How are you doing, babygirl?”
Mor had always felt like an older sister to you. Her friendship with your brother had made the two of you close.
“I’m…I’m not doing good,” you replied, honestly. “I can’t…I don’t know what to do, Mor. I don’t know how to move on from here. Part of me wishes I died in that alleyway. I wish I died the minute my wings were cut off.”
“I know,” she said, sadly. “I wish I had an answer for you but I don’t. It’s going to be hard, but we’re going to be with you every step of the way.”
“Come on, why don’t you sit up so you can eat,” Cassian murmured, putting a hand on your back to help you up.
“I’m not hungry,” you protested.
“You have to eat something, sweetheart,” Cass said gently. “Madja’s orders.”
But you shook your head. You didn’t have an appetite. Everything still hurt so much.
“Just give her a second, Cass,” Mor murmured.
Cassian frowned but nodded. He brushed some of your hair away from your face again and the soothing motion started another round of tears.
“Hey, hey,” Cassian whispered. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not okay, Cass! How will I ever be able to show my face again?” you cried. “I will be shamed, spit on, shunned because I lost my wings—because I couldn’t fight for them. I can never return to Illyria. I won’t be able to help train with the girls anymore.”
“Emerie told me the girls are already awaiting your return. They miss you,” Mor reassured. “Who cares about what the stupid males are going to think? Most of those females have had their freedom of flight taken from them. They would never shun you for what happened.”
Your eyes fell on the many bouquets of flowers and get well cards on your nightstand. Cassian had been bringing them to you. Your heart ached at the sight.
“But I failed them, Mor,” you sobbed. “I failed them. I’m supposed to be strong. I’m supposed to be a warrior and all it took was one male to completely destroy me. I’m worthless to them now. How can I teach them to fight for themselves if I cannot even do that?”
“You are not worthless,” Cassian said, sternly. “You are more of a fighter than half of those Illyrian males. You continue to fight each day knowing you have to live with the loss of your wings. Most of the males would’ve given up already, sweetheart. You are stronger than you think.”
“I-I’m not. I’m weak and a failure,” you cried. “I couldn’t protect my wings. Couldn’t keep my mate’s love. Couldn’t…couldn’t–”
Your sobs overtook your words, your entire body shaking.
“Listen to me, Y/n.” Mor demanded. “You are not weak. You are not a failure. You are a million times better than the two assholes who hurt you. You will survive this. You will survive him. I promise you, Y/n, I promise you.”
She embraced you, holding you as you broke down into gut-wrenching sobs once again.
────────────
The air was tense to say the least. Rhys was standing behind his desk, palms pressed flat against the surface as he stared at the two people sitting in front of him. Feyre stood next to him as both a pillar of support and the High Lady.
Azriel’s eyes were downcast. He hadn’t even looked at Elain since he had been dragged into this office by Mor—a new black eye and a bruised jaw decorating his face. Elain stared and stared at him, her eyes pleading with him to look at her but he ignored her presence.
Azriel looked rough. He hadn’t shaved, his eyes were bloodshot, but the most surprising thing was his lack of shadows swarming him.
“Where are you shadows?” Rhys asked. “I swear, Azriel, if you sent them after Y/n, I will bring Cassian down here to do with you as he pleases.”
Azriel looked up, shaking his head. “They won’t sing to me anymore. Not since…Not since the accident.”
It was true. His shadows had hissed at him, recoiled in his presence before they dissipated as if they too had felt his betrayal. They had wailed in agony at the loss of Y/n. They had always skittered away in Elain’s presence, probably the only reason they never yelled at him when he was with her…but it seems this time, they had left for good.
Despite his curiosity, Rhys decided to drop the subject. This was not the time or place for that discussion.
“Feyre and I have come to a decision about what must happen due to the results of your actions,” Rhys said, his voice full of authority and resignation.
“What? But we��ve done nothing wrong!” Elain exclaimed. “I know we shouldn’t have gone behind Y/n’s back but we’re in love!”
“I don’t care,” Rhys snarled, baring his teeth. “I don’t care how much you two claim to be in love! Azriel has caused irreparable damage to his own mate—a member of my court, of my family. And you were complicit in that.”
“Are we not your family too? Feyre is my sister!”
“And Y/n is mine,” Rhys retorted. “And Cassian’s.”
Elain crossed her arms and leaned back in her chair. “So we’re being punished for falling in love? It’s not our fault the Cauldron decided to make someone else our mates. It was never our choice.”
“You’re not being punished for falling in love, if that’s even what we can call this,” Feyre spat out, staring at her sister with disappointment. “You’re being punished for how you handled a sensitive situation. You’re being punished for lying to our whole family and for causing it to be torn apart.”
“You’re not being punished at all,” Rhys snapped. “If you were, both of you would be in a cell in Hewn City and I’d let Cassian decide what your punishment would be considering Y/n would never have the heart to hurt either of you. This is simply the consequence of your own stupid actions.”
Azriel’s head shot up at the mention of your name. “How is Y/n? Is she doing okay?”
Feyre went to answer but Rhys shook his head at her.
“You don’t get the privilege of knowing anything about her at this point, Azriel,” he huffed.
Azriel stood from his chair in anger. “She is my mate, Rhys.”
“Sit down,” Rhys commanded, his voice rising for the first time since the meeting started. “Funny how now you acknowledge her as a mate but not when you had your tongue down Elain’s throat.”
“Fuck you, Rhys,” Azriel growled, but sat, unable to fight the power of a High Lord’s order.
“No fuck you, Azriel! I thought you were my brother! How could you do this to Y/n? To our family? Both of you should be ashamed. You are already getting off easy, don’t make me rethink my choice. Lucien has every right to storm in right now and demand a blood duel against you. And even though it’s not a practice in my court, I’d even let Y/n declare one against Elain.”
Elain’s face paled but Azriel only scoffed in indignation. “As if Feyre would ever let anyone kill one of her sisters.”
Feyre stepped forward, glaring at the shadowsinger and Elain. “I’m done protecting her. Nesta is done protecting her. We have spent our whole lives taking care of her thinking she was just too soft for this world—too naive and innocent. But I think we’re finally seeing the real you, Elain. And it is time for you to face the consequences of your own actions, make your own way in life.”
“So what are you going to do? Are you going to force me to live in the House of Wind like you did Nesta?”
“No,” Feyre said, stone faced before looking at Rhys. They had decided together how they would handle this situation.
“You are both hereby banished from the Night Court,” Rhys declared. “I will not tolerate Y/n having to lose her own home after she just lost her wings and we are going to do what's best for her. Lucien has made it clear that you both will not be welcomed in Day either and Helion is standing by his son’s decision. Beyond that, we cannot help you. You will pack your things and leave immediately. If you step one foot in this court after you leave, I will be notified and you will face worse repercussions.”
“What?” Elain exclaimed. “Feyre, you can’t be serious! Look, I’ll move out of the Riverhouse. We can live in Azriel’s apartment and avoid Y/n.”
“That apartment belongs to Y/n too, you know,” Feyre snapped. “We have already made our decision. We will not be negotiating any terms.”
“Rhys, come on,” Azriel said. “I will leave but you don’t need to banish Elain too. She did nothing wrong.”
“Elain knew you were a mated male, knew you were together with Y/n. While I agree that what you have done is worse, she still knew what she was doing wasn’t right.”
“Where are we supposed to go?” Elain cried. “I don’t have any money. I don’t have anywhere to go, Feyre. You can’t just toss me out like this.”
“Azriel has money,” Feyre shrugged. “I guess you’re his problem now.”
“You know none of the other High Lord’s will want me in their courts, Rhys,” Azriel snarled. “Not after the things I’ve done for you.”
“Should of thought of that before you betrayed our whole family.”
“I hear the old Manor is still abandoned in the human lands,” Feyre remarked. “Since Vassa had reclaimed her territory with Jurian at her side and Lucien had moved to Day to be with his father.”
“We can’t survive there,” Elain sobbed. “Humans hate faeries.”
“Not my problem, Elain,” Feyre said. “You’re not my problem anymore.”
“Azriel, do something!” Elain cried, looking at the shadowsinger.
“What do you expect him to do?” Rhys laughed humorlessly. “He no longer has his title, his place in my court. He has no sway here. You both don’t. You will not change our minds.”
“Nesta won’t allow this!”
“Nesta,” Feyre said, “is packing up your things as we speak.”
Elain fell back in her chair, crying.
“I’d say I wish you two the best, but I don’t,” Rhys said. “You have two hours to sort out whatever you have to before I expect you both to be out of my court. Two hours. Do you understand?”
“Please,” Elain begged. “Please don’t do this, Feyre.”
But Feyre only shook her head at her sister. “There’s no going back for either of you. Say your goodbyes, sort out your affairs, but you will leave in two hours.”
Rhys took his leave after that, giving Azriel one last look that was full of disgust, guilt, regret, sadness. One last look at his brother before striding out of that room, never to see or speak to him again.
────────────
Mor had just left when you heard the flapping of wings approaching your balcony. Thinking it was your brother, you pushed yourself to stand and hobbled over to the balcony doors using the walls of your room for support. You opened the door, expecting to see your brother, but your heart stopped when you came face to face with Azriel.
Your eyes narrowed and you went to slam the door, but he grabbed it before you could.
“Please, please just hear me out,” he pleaded. “I will leave, I promise, I just…I just—please.”
“There is nothing you can say that will make me forgive you, Azriel.”
“I know, baby–”
“Don’t you dare call me that!”
Azriel looked down at his feet. “Okay, I’m sorry. I’m not here to try to earn your forgiveness, Y/n. I know I fucked up beyond repair. I know I failed you, failed us. Words will never be able to convey how much I regret everything.”
You crossed your arms, leaning against the doorframe as your legs threatened to give out. You were debating screaming out for Cassian.
Azriel reached into his pocket and pulled out a small stone that looked to be enchanted. He held it out towards you.
“I can’t…I can’t hear the shadows anymore,” he murmured. “But I can’t just leave you without some way to contact me. In case you ever change your mind, in case there is ever a chance that we can be together again. You’ll be able to call for me with this.”
“That is never going to happen.”
“Please, just take it,” Azriel begged. “Even if you don’t want me, please. If you’re ever in danger again and need help, you can use it for that too. Just please, take it.”
When you said nothing, didn’t so much as open your palm so he could place the stone in it, he knelt down and placed it at your feet instead. You stared at him, emotionless. You didn’t want to give him anything. He didn’t deserve your tears or your sadness.
“I’m so sorry, Y/n. I’m so sorry for the way things ended,” Azriel said. “You deserve a better mate than me. If I never…If I never get to see you again after this, I promise I will find you in the next life and the one after that. I will do right by you. I will give us another chance.”
He stared at you, pleading with you to say anything. Anything. Even if you screamed at him, beat him, cried—anything was better than this utter silence. But you didn’t. You merely looked at him like he was nothing to you. Like he was a stranger.
“Goodbye, Azriel,” you said. “I hope you find happiness in your life. Truly.”
And then you slammed the door shut and walked away.
And he knew then that your words would haunt him for the rest of his life because he knew he had lost the one real thing that had brought him true happiness forever.
────────────
One Year Later ~ Winter Solstice
“Get up, you lazy cow!”
The sheets were yanked off your sleeping body, exposing you to the cold morning air. You let out a shriek, cursing at your brother and trying to grab the sheets back.
“What the hell, Cassian!”
“It’s Winter Solstice!”
“It’s also six in the morning,” you retorted, falling back down on your bed.
“Nope, you’re not going back to sleep,” Cassian said. “It’s time to get up!”
Before you could even respond, Cassian grabbed you by the ankle and yanked you to the end of the bed. You squealed as he tossed you over his shoulder like a bag of potatoes, pounding on his back as he raced out of the room.
“Cassian! Let me down, you big brute!”
But he only laughed at you, carrying you all the way to the kitchen where Nesta was sitting at the counter with a steaming cup of tea. She didn’t so much as blink as he dropped you into the chair next to her, already used to her mate’s antics.
“Goodmorning, Y/n,” Nesta said, pushing an already prepared cup of tea your way.
“Oh, you are an absolute goddess,” you groaned, greedily accepting the mug. You curled your ice cold fingers around it, relishing in the warmth.
“Hey! What about me?” Cassian yelled, swinging a wash cloth over his shoulder as he started to make breakfast for the two of you. “I’m the one making you guys food!”
“You’re also the one who woke us up, dingbat,” you scoffed, causing Nesta to snort.
It wasn’t long before Cassian was sliding a plate of pancakes your way. “Eat up. You have a long day ahead of you.”
You raised an eyebrow at him but accepted the food, scarfing it down. It was almost hilarious how out of the three of you it was Cassian who cooked the best.
After breakfast, you retired to your room to get ready to go down to the River House for the real celebrations. Cassian had cryptically told you to wear pants, so you did. You had no idea why until hours later, when you were all lounging in the sitting room after lunch.
A knock on the front door had you jumping up from your seat. “I’ll get it!”
No one batted an eye as you raced for the door, pulling it open to see Lucien standing on the doorstep. You let out a noise of excitement, grabbing him in a hug.
“Lucien!” you exclaimed. “You’re here early!”
A few weeks after the incident, Lucien had sent you a letter asking how you were faring and offering you support. He became a lifeline while you had dealt with the aftermath of saying goodbye to your mate and healing. You both leaned on each other during that time because you were simply the only two who understood the pain of having a mate who fell in love with another.
“Happy Winter Solstice,” he said as you pulled away and opened the door wider so he could enter. “I’m actually here to retrieve you.”
Your brows furrowed in confusion. “What?”
“Is everything ready?”
Your brother’s voice came from behind you and you whipped your head around to stare at him. He was wearing his flying leathers now only confusing you further.
“Yes,” Lucien nodded.
“What’s going on?” you asked, suspiciously.
No one else followed Cassian out. Not even Nesta. You frowned as he shook Lucien’s hand, giving him a friendly whack on the back.
“You’ll see,” your brother said with a grin. “Lucien is going to winnow us somewhere, kiddo, to your solstice gift.”
You looked between them with narrowed eyes but accepted Lucien’s outstretched hand. His grin was the last thing you saw before you were pulled away in a flurry of wind. A second later, you appeared in the middle of a clearing.
The tall green grass, the slightly warm breeze, the lack of snow, told you that you were in the Spring Court. You whirled to face your brother who let out a sneeze as soon as he got his bearings.
“What are we doing here?”
“So, you know how when Feyre was brought back she was given a drop of power from every High Lord?” Cassian asked.
You nodded, not understanding where this was going. Your hand slipped into your pocket, around a stone that was always kept there. The one Azriel had left you. You had never used it but for some reason, had never parted with it either. At some point, you had started holding it whenever you felt nervous or fell back into the heartache you had experienced last year.
“Well, of course she inherited part of Tamlin’s shapeshifting powers. And we thought maybe she could shapeshift others the way he does, but after numerous tries, unfortunately it seems as though the sliver of power she received only allows her to transform herself.”
“It was not fun being the guinea pig for those test runs,” Lucien laughed. “When Feyre was unable to do it, we had to turn to someone else.”
“Okay, but what does that have to do with me? Or my solstice gift?”
Before either of them could respond, a noise came from the shrubbery in the distance. Tamlin’s beast form pounced out from it, striding towards you. You gasped and backed away, right into your brother’s chest. He placed a hand on your shoulder.
“It’s okay,” he murmured. “He’s here as a favor to Lucien.”
“And Feyre and Rhys approved this?” you whispered up to him.
He nodded his assurance.
You let out another gasp as Tamlin shifted back into his fae form. He looked well, better than the last time you had seen him at least. He seemed to have regained some weight and gotten a haircut. You knew he was still in the process of recovering his court. You wondered what sort of strings Lucien had to pull to get him to willingly let you and Cassian come here considering his history with your rulers.
He gave you and Cassian a polite, but bland, greeting which you reciprocated.
“Are any of you going to tell me what’s going on?”
“Tam is going to help you shapeshift,” Lucien explained. “If you will allow him.”
“Shapeshift? But why would I–”
It clicked in your head, what they were implying, why they had brought you to this large clearing. You whipped around to look up at your brother who seemed to be holding back tears. He gave you a nod, already knowing what you were asking.
“W-wings,” you choked out. “He can give me wings.”
“It won’t last forever,” Lucien said. “But yes, he can give you wings.”
Tears started slipping down your cheeks and you lurched towards Lucien, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him into a hug. You…you were going to have wings. You were going to be able to fly!
You didn’t care that it wouldn’t last forever. Just the chance to fly once more was a gift in itself.
“Thank you,” you whispered into his ear. “Thank you.”
Lucien laughed, hugging you back before you slowly pulled away from him. You looked over your shoulder at your brother. “This was your idea?”
Cassian shook his head. “As much as I wish I could claim this, it was actually Lucien who thought of this first. I’m just here to supervise–and to offer you a flying partner if you’ll have me.”
You smiled up at Lucien, unbelievably touched at the thoughtfulness. Lucien wiped your tears from your face, gently, before placing his hands on your shoulders. “Are you ready?”
You nodded with enthusiasm.
Lucien gestured at Tamlin to come closer.
“Thank you for doing this,” you said to him with a small bow of the head.
“I once watched a faerie die after losing his wings,” Tamlin murmured. “Its…Its a horrific crime. One my family has a history with. I’d like this to be my first step towards making amends for their mistakes.”
You weren’t sure what to say, so you just gave him a grateful nod of the head. He focused intently on you and you felt his magic surround you. It felt nice, like a crisp Spring breeze. And then you felt a familiar weight on your back. You stumbled for a second, readjusting to how it used to feel having wings. But it surprisingly came back to you quite easily.
You looked at them over your shoulder, stretching them out and flapping them a few times. They looked just like your brother’s and you realized Tamlin must’ve used him as a guide. You grinned, facing Cassian.
“Race you towards the end of the clearing,” you shouted before taking off into the sky.
Your brother’s laughter followed after you as he too launched into the sky.
+++
Hours after night had fallen, you found yourself behind the River House, leaning on the railing to watch the slow moving river. Your wings had since dissipated, but you hadn’t felt this light in a long time. Being able to fly today had healed you in some way.
You had spent a lot of time thinking while you flew amongst the clouds. Thinking of who you used to be. Sometimes you missed that girl, sometimes you wished more than anything to be her again.
But you hadn’t felt that today…
Today, you had felt like a new person. Like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon. And perhaps in a way, you were.
Life had never been predictable. Your whole life had been filled with tragedy and sorrow, challenges and hard work, happiness and joy, regret and insecurities. You had gone through so much, so much, but somehow, you were always able to come out on the other side.
It wasn’t easy. It involved many days of despair, awful thoughts, and soulless recovery. You had to fight to get up sometimes, had to fight just to feel something. Sometimes it seemed like you’d conquer one mountain only to be faced with another.
If it wasn’t for your brother, you were certain you would’ve fallen back a dozen times. But he had been your pillar of strength, your rock to rest against when things got too hard. And Mor and Rhys had been there to help lift you back up.
You had gained new friends, found a new life for yourself. Metamorphosed into a new person.
That girl from a year ago?
Well, you were finally going to let her die.
You reached into your pocket and pulled out the stone Azriel had left you. You ran your thumb over its smooth surface. It didn’t hurt as much to look at it now, not like it had before. Before it had represented so many things.
The loss of love, the grief of losing your wings, the reminder that he had betrayed you.
But now…now it just looked like a rock.
You gripped it in your fist and tossed it into the Sidra, watching as it hit the water’s surface with a small thud before sinking down into the black water. Down and down, until it would find its way to the bottom. Perhaps then it would drift out into the sea.
You heard the backdoor to the house open.
“Hey, Y/n, come on!” Mor shouted out to you. “We’re going to Ritas!”
You took one last look at where the rock had disappeared in the water, letting out a long breath.
“Goodbye,” you whispered into the cold air. “I’ll see you in our next lifetime. Maybe then you’ll deserve me.”
With a new weight lifted off your shoulders, you turned and marched back to your new beginning.
#acotar#azriel#acotar fanfiction#acotar x reader#acotar x you#azriel x reader#azriel x you#azriel shadowsinger#azriel fanfic#azriel angst#azriel acotar#azriel imagine#angst with a happy ending
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⋆。°DRUNK DAZED ! ☆
﹙✮﹚── includes : dazai, chuuya, atsushi, ranpo, sigma & tetchou x fem! reader ♡
﹙✮﹚── content warnings : nsfw content (mdni), oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, facesitting, overstimulation, petnames, degradation, penetrative sex, a teeeeeny tiny mention of blood etc ♡
﹙✮﹚── synopsis : they're pussydrunk ♡
﹙✮﹚── author's note : since y'all chose smut for the poll here you guys go, enjoy the meal hehe 😋 birthday fic coming next so keep an eye out for that 😏
DAZAI ⋆。° ✮
You bit on your bottom lip to suppress your moans, legs shaking like jelly as a mixture of your slick and your boyfriend's saliva ran down your legs, staining the cold floor of the storage room of the agency. You really hoped nobody came to look for you two, or even walk in the direction of the room.
"keep your legs open, pretty," dazai slurred, his voice deep with lust and more importantly, the adoration he held for you. You were his pretty baby, after all. His sweet belladonna, who he was eating like a 3 course meal right now. You were pushed against the door of the storage room while he was on his knees, worshipping his pussy.
Dazai felt his phone buzzing in his pocket, it was most likely Kunikida, wondering where the hell the brunette went during work hours. He couldn't care less though, too busy making out with your cunt. His skilled tongue worked wonders on your clit, fingers buried knuckles deep into your velvety walls as you bit the back of your hand to try and stay quiet. He kept eye contact with you the whole time, pulling his fingers out briefly to fuck you with his tongue, chocolate brown eyes staring deep into your own teary ones. "you look so beautiful right now. I wish you could see yourself, bella," he hummed, voice smooth like honey as he buried his face even deeper between your wobbly legs, wanting to taste every last drop of your addicting arousal. He could feel his cock throbbing in his pants, the fabric ever so restricting. He ignored it though, too focused on making you cum on his tongue first. His nose bumped against your clit everytime he thrusted his tongue into you. He watched your eyes roll back slightly, losing focus as you tug on his fluffy hair, "close— 'm close! 'samu—" you threw your head back, some drool slipping past your lips as your grip tightened on his brunette roots. "I know, baby, I know. cum f'me, sweetheart. I know you can," he groaned, the noise vibrating against your cunt. That was the last straw before you came all over his face. He eagerly slurped up all of your slick, moaning lowly at the slightly bitter taste. You were addicting to him. He stood up, dusting off his pants before he pulled your panties back up, snapping the waistband against your skin with a smirk. His arms were still holding you up, supporting your weight as you calmed down from your high. You looked down to see a puddle of your juices on the floor and Dazai's...soaked pants? "osamu, did you—" you were cut off by the door slamming open.
You were fucked, good luck.
CHUUYA ⋆。° ✮
You were tied to the bedpost for God knows how long, the red ribbons snaked around your naked body while the pretty pink vibrator attached to your clit buzzed away, tormenting you with each passing second. You regretted messing with Chuuya during his phone call. You should've just been a good girl, he said before leaving you all tied up and needy.
Your ears perked up when the bedroom door opened, Chuuya walked in the room with a cocky smirk. "how's my little slut holding up?" He chuckled, clearly satisfied with how much of a mess he made you. He brushed a few stray hairs out of your face, tucking them behind your ear. He groaned, you were practically sitting on a pool of your own arousal, your inner thighs shiny with your slick. He brought a hand down to your core, collecting some of your slick on his gloved finger before shoving them inside you. You gasped, back arching from the sudden intrusion. Your tummy felt like it was on fire, being denied release for hours. "s'mean— you're mean," you sniffeled, glaring up at your lover with teary eyes. His lips stretched to a grin at your adorableness, "this too much for you, sweetness?" He cooed, making space for himself between your legs and laying on his stomach. He took his gloves off, chucking them somewhere in the room before he licked his lips in anticipation. He could smell how turned on you were, desperate for your sweet orgasm. Your hips bucked when his fingers inched closer to your heat, making him stifle a laugh. He finally took the vibrator off, placing it on the fancy nightstand beside the bed before diving head first between your thighs. He licked a fat stripe up your cunt, bucking his hips into the soft mattress as he ate you like a starved animal. You tried to grab onto something— anything to ground yourself but alas, you were still tied up. He suckled on your swollen clit eagerly, lips wrapped around the sensitive bud as his tongue swirled around it. You squealed when his fingers pushed into your hole again, your gummy walls twitching around them. "good— tastes so good, doll. been thinking about this all fucking evening,” he growled into your cunt. Being edged for so long, you couldn't hold out for much longer, squirting all over his face. He blinked, clearly shocked from your juices spraying all over him. You were about to apologize when you saw Chuuya’s eyes darken, jaw clenching as he stared at you, ��that was the hottest shit I’ve ever seen you do, fuck,” he groaned, going back to devouring you with double— if not triple the eagerness. “you’re gonna do that again. I’m not stopping until you soak the whole fuckin’ bed.”
ATSUSHI ⋆。° ✮
Words couldn’t describe how fucking exhausted you were right now, your body aching from how long Atsushi had been drilling his cock into you. You were so overstimulated at this point, pussy swollen from the continuous abuse your boyfriend had been putting it through.
“shit— baby, you feel s’good, so tight for me—” Atsushi groaned, his claws digging into your hips, drawing slight blood as he got lost in the feeling of your cunt spasming around his cock. He was practically foaming at the mouth, just as overstimulated as you were but showed absolutely no signs of stopping anytime soon. His cock was swollen and an angry shade of red, indicating just how sensitive he was but he still could not get enough of your sticky cunt, burying himself in you even though his dick was screaming at him to give it a rest. You weren’t any better either, brain completely fried from his cock driving in and out of you at a rapid pace, his pelvis rubbing against your sensitive clit while you racked your pretty nails down his back. It was downright filthy. But the both of you were too out of it too care, losing yourselves in each other’s embrace. “cumming— oh god, fuck!” He panted, biting your shoulder to ground himself atleast a little bit.
It had been an hour since that, he was shooting blanks into your battered cunt at this point. Your eyes were barely open, close to passing out, your legs felt like jelly from how much they were trembling, nails now buried in the sheets as you sobbed, “ ‘sushi— ‘m too sensitive! can’t—” you gasped when he wrapped his lips around your nipple, whining, “jus’ one more time, pleasepleaseplease—” he shuddered before painting your insides white with his seed, arms wrapped around your half conscious figure as he savoured the blissful high. You almost fell asleep after a few minutes, eyes closing when Atsushi’s hips start moving again. You were about to speak when he cut you off, “shh, just one more, please?”
RANPO ⋆。° ✮
"ranpo, I'm not gonna sit on your face," you huffed, crossing your arms. He pouted, "c'mon, sugar. it'd feel sooooo good." You sighed, deadpanning at him. "I'll share my snacks with you for a month if you—" "deal."
You chewed on your bottom lip as you hovered over Ranpo's face, "are you sure about this? I don't want to accidentally hurt y—" you gasped when he pulled down on his awaiting mouth, too impatient to let you finish your sentence or reassure you. His thumb pushed your panties to the side, revealing your pretty pussy to him. He licked a long stripe up your cunt, making you whimper. You tried to sit back up on your knees but he was holding you down tight, slim fingers digging into your hips. His greedy tongue swirled around your clit before flicking it. He moaned into your cunt when you ground down on his face, muttering out little curses and his name. His tongue moved down to your hole, pushing in while he brought his hand to your clit, fingers rubbing your clit in swift circles. You felt like you were on cloud nine, mouth watering at the pleasure your boyfriend was inflicting upon you. You reached back to cup his dick through his shorts, the fabric slightly damp with his precum. He gasped when you palmed him through them, pinching your clit lightly to get back at you. You yelped, grinding down harder on his eager face, feeling his cock twitch in your hand. He liked that. He scoffed, the sound muffled between your thighs. He greedily slurped on your juices, savouring your taste on his tongue and fuck, he could feel his eyes roll back behind closed lids. You felt the coil in your stomach tighten— so close to snapping. "yesyesyes— god, ranpo!" You squealed, gushing all over your lover's face. He let out a guttural noise, drinking all of your arousal up before finally lifting you up from his face. You could see his face completely soaked with your liquid, a lopsided grin on his face, "see? was that so bad?" You laughed, shaking your head, wondering why the actual fuck you hadn't tried it sooner.
SIGMA ⋆。° ✮
You had Sigma tied up on your bed, pretty pink ribbons matching his pretty pink cock, leaking precum from the flushed tip. He was glaring at you, demanding to be untied immediately but you just smirked, having too much fun teasing your boyfriend like this.
"such a good boy, aren't you, sigma?" You slurred, eyes shutting in pleasure when he flicked his tongue on your clit, hard cock aching to be inside you. Your hand brushed through his bangs, making him look up at you, your slick covering the lower half of his handsome face. God, he was beautiful. He hummed against your leaking cunt, slobbering all over your heat. He wanted to pleasure you with everything he had, his tongue, fingers and cock but unfortunately for him, he was tied up. He wasn't too sure of the idea before but now? Now he was enthusiastically burying his face between your thighs, running his tongue up and down your pretty folds. You tasted like heaven to him, a little break from the hell he went through. Your moans and giggles of pleasure were music to his ears, making his face flush with each lewd noise you make. His brain felt foggy from your addicting taste, so sweet on his tongue as he lapped everything up, nose bumping against your clit. You'd think he was one getting head from how much pre his cock was leaking, he couldn't help but hump the mattress, growing downright addicted to your taste. Lavender and white locks of hair framing his face perfectly, your hand buried in it as he ate you up like his last meal on earth. He could feel your cunt clenching and unclenching on his tongue and he moaned, the sound borderline pornographic as his eyes rolled back. His face was flushed a shade of pink down to his neck. "god— you taste so—" he cut himself off with a groan, gasping when you cum all over his face, your head thrown back and exposing your neck as you moan his name. You looked down to see Sigma's face red, swollen lips coated in a layer of your shiny slick. He looked dazed, half lidded eyes looking at you with hunger, "more. n-need more," he panted, burying his face back into your sopping heat.
TETCHOU ⋆。° ✮
You didn't know how you ended up like this, one moment you're training with your boyfriend and the next moment you're getting folded by him on the carpeted floor as he bullies his thick cock past your tight entrance.
You felt like you were in a daze, legs pushed up against your chest, mouth forming an 'o' shape as your eyes roll back into your skull. Tetchou's bangs were brushing against your forehead, sweat dripping down his muscular back as he rolled his hips into you. He could see and feel the way your cunt sucked him in, not letting him go. He placed open mouthed kisses on your neck and collarbones, nibbling on the sensitive flesh. His fingers dug into the back of your thighs, leaving indented marks from how firm he was gripping them. "hah— takin' my cock s'well," he rasped before pressing his lips against yours, swallowing your moans and whimpers while plowing into you. Your pussy was all swollen and sensitive from how long he'd been at this. His previous load was dripping down your ass, staining the carpet below. You felt so good— so tight and wet all for him, he felt like home in your cunt, hips smacking against your ass erratically while you milked his cock for all it's worth. You couldn't even think properly anymore, too fucked out to have any coherent thoughts but his cock. He could feel his mouth water at the sight of your teary eyes rolling back, tongue lolling out slightly as he fucked the brains out of you. He wasn't any better either, panting and gasping with each thrust, growling every time you clench down on his cock so deliciously. You put him in a trance, he wasn't thinking with his brain anymore, much too occupied by drilling his cock into your welcoming heat, fat tip kissing your cervix with each thrust, making a wet noise each time his hips met your ass.
©sachiyoh— do not copy, plagiarize and repost my works to any platform, reblogs are very appreciated♡
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hiiii can you do an Hyunchan x reader where the boys are really mad at her an ignorining her and she has a panic attack.
ℙ𝕒𝕥𝕚𝕖𝕟𝕔𝕖
Warning: Angst/fluff
Summary: Request!
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
"Chan?" she called out softly, her voice barely rising above the hum of the quiet room as she stood by the living room door. The tension in the air was thick, heavy. It had been 12 hours since the argument, and neither Chan nor Hyunjin had said a word to her. The silence was suffocating, making her feel like she was going to lose it.
"Hyunjin?" She tried again, this time addressing the other side of the room, but once more, there was no response. Her heart pounded in her chest.
"Are you guys going to ignore me forever?" she muttered, barely more than a whisper. Still, neither of them budged, their backs turned, their attention focused elsewhere.
Her chest tightened, and the pressure behind her eyes threatened to spill over. "Please? I’m sorry… I just—please don’t ignore me," she begged, taking a few tentative steps forward, but the distance between them felt as if it were growing wider. She could feel the weight of their silence pressing down on her.
Hyunjin laid his head on Chan's shoulder, his body language as cold as his silence. They refused to look at her. The tears she had been holding back began to burn, stinging her eyes, threatening to fall as she silently begged them to forgive her for the words exchanged earlier.
Her breath hitched in her throat as she turned away, feeling the overwhelming weight of her emotions. Defeated, she slowly made her way to the kitchen. She could feel the air thick with tension, her body moving on autopilot as she began to prepare dinner. They had already eaten lunch without her earlier, and now, after just returning from practice, she was left to make dinner alone, as though everything was fine.
The tears blurred her vision, and her head spun with confusion and sorrow. It was as if the world was closing in on her, the weight of it all pressing harder with every passing second. She could hear her own thoughts, each one darker than the last, and she hated how powerless she felt to push them away.
Once the food was done and plated, she brought it to the table in silence. Her hands shook slightly as she set the plates down, then quietly made her way back to the living room.
"I made you guys some dinner, if you want it," she said, her voice barely above a whisper. "I put it on the table. I'll go eat in the room, so don't worry about me." She didn't wait for a response, knowing it was unlikely she’d get one.
Once in their room, she sat at her vanity, the food on her plate growing cold as she picked at it slowly, each bite feeling like it was stuck in her throat. The tears started to fall, silently at first, as she stared blankly ahead, lost in her own thoughts.
Would they break up with her? The thought kept running through her mind, a constant whisper of doubt that she couldn’t shake.
She hadn’t even noticed her breathing quicken, the pressure in her chest building, until it was almost too much to bear. Her chest tightened painfully, and her hands trembled as she clutched her chest. The feeling of rejection weighed heavily on her, and she felt the panic beginning to spiral.
"Please... enough," she whispered to herself, trying desperately to compose herself, but the sobs started to escape anyway. Her head throbbed, her heart raced, and the room felt like it was spinning. She felt utterly alone.
Then, the door opened.
Her heart skipped a beat, and through the mirror, she saw Chan and Hyunjin standing in the doorway. They had finished dinner.
She quickly wiped her eyes, but the damage was done. Her tears streaked down her cheeks as she bowed her head in embarrassment. Her breathing was still erratic, but she refused to let them see her like this, not wanting them to see how fragile she truly felt.
"Y/nnie? Baby?" Chan’s voice was hoarse, filled with concern, as he hurried to her side. Hyunjin was right behind him.
Chan knelt beside her, trying to catch her gaze, but she couldn’t bring herself to look at him. She turned away, too embarrassed, her face flushed with shame.
"Hey… look at me," he urged gently, his hand reaching to cup her cheek, his touch warm and soft.
Her breathing quickened again, and she pulled away from his touch. "Please, I’m sorry..." she whispered, her voice shaking with each breath. "Please dont break up with me, i can change."
Hyunjin's frown deepened as he knelt beside her on the other side. "Y/nnie… you’re panicking," he said softly, his eyes filled with concern. "I’m so sorry I made you feel like this."
He truly had no idea it had gone this far. He never wanted her to feel like this, never wanted to push her to the point where she felt like she might lose them.
"You… you don’t have to be with me. I’ve accepted it," she whispered, her voice barely audible.
Chan’s heart sank, and he pulled her gently off the chair, guiding her to the bed. He held her close, his hands reassuring as he wrapped her in his arms, trying to calm her.
"I’ll go make her some tea," Hyunjin whispered, but Chan didn’t let go, his focus entirely on her. He nodded, thankful for Hyunjin’s understanding.
"Hey… shhh," Chan whispered, his voice soft, soothing. "It’s okay. No one is going to leave you. We were just being assholes, and we should’ve talked things out with you, Y/nnie. I’m sorry." He kissed the top of her head, his words gentle but full of remorse.
But she wasn’t sure she believed him. If she weren’t in this state, would they still be mad at her?
"But you can’t just do that to me," she cried into his chest, her voice cracking. "It hurts, Chan. It hurts so much. I would never do that to you guys."
Chan’s grip tightened around her, his voice filled with regret. "You’re right, Y/n. We shouldn’t have treated you like that. We were just so angry, and now we’re learning from our mistakes. I never want to put you through this again, baby." He gently tilted her chin, urging her to meet his eyes. "Hey… look at me."
She slowly lifted her gaze to his, and his heart melted as he saw the pain still clouding her eyes.
"My beautiful girl," he whispered, his voice soft with affection and regret. "I’m so sorry. You can put me on any punishment duty you want."
"Anything?" she asked, her voice tinged with mischief, a small glimmer of her old spark returning in her eyes.
"Anything," Chan gulped, knowing that he and Hyunjin were about to go on a rollercoaster ride of their own making. But he would do whatever it took to make things right, for her.
✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧
Don't forget to reblog and follow! <3
A/N: Thank you anon!
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perfect ~ Dom! Choso x Chubby! Insecure! Reader
Choso is one big man. He could pick you up and throw you over his shoulder as if you weighed nothing- but recently, you started to become a little distant with your boyfriend; your sex drive has gone down dramatically, you don't really let your boyfriend hug you under your arms let alone touch your stomach or thighs. Choso has always known about your insecurities regarding your weight and body figure- but he thinks that everything about you absolutely perfect in every way possible. He's absolutely crazy about you, especially your body. But recently, you don't think so.
Word count: 6000
Dom! Choso x Chubby! Insecure! Reader smut. Alternative AU. reader is a liiiiiittle bit of an ooc, whoops. Praising, sweet talk, face grabbing, heavy choking, air / wall sex (?), oral sex, breeding, manhandling, body checking, (you're all perfect no matter what, I love you ♡), choso has tattoos and piercings,,,, yummy. CHUBBY GIRLIES NEED LOVE TOO GUYS!!!
Choso and you have a love so deep for each other, that oftentimes, it feels like it was written in a story book. You guys are two halves of the same person, and one without the other was rare- uncommon. What was weird about it, is that you two are polar opposites. He prefers things a certain way, you prefer things another. Although there have been bumps in the relationship due to the differences you two face, nether of you could think of a life without the other in it. You guys were fated, that's the way things were, and will continue to be.
Choso is undeniably crazy about you. Everything you do, anything you say is perfect to him. Your mind, body, and soul were devastatingly beautiful. He would do anything you asked him to do without second thought, he even does things you don't ask him to. The first moment he laid eyes on you in his tattoo shop, he couldn't get you out of his head. He was even worked up the entire time he was tattooing you too, wandering eyes that trailed a little too far down your body for his own good. What made the experience even better was how talkative you were with him, how warm and comfortable you made the atmosphere of his tattoo studio feel. The two of you talked for hours about the most random things- he got to know you a little.
After that tattoo appointment, he wanted to know more about you. He wanted to know everything, he wanted everything. You were just so beautiful, he couldn't help himself.
and you felt the exact same way. Your eyes fixated on the tattoos that littered his arms and neck. The way his lip piercings complimented his face perfectly. His deep, raspy voice making you feel things you shouldn't about a stranger. And especially the way his fingers moved on your skin as he marks you with his art. You couldnt help yourself. Six months later, you came in for a touch up on your beautiful tattoo and things blossomed from there.
Now here you were, three blissful years later in your shared apartment. Choso was at the studio as you lay in your bed, scrolling on your phone looking through your social media. A beautiful, blonde haired, skinny girl popped up and suddenly, the salt and vinegar chips you were eating felt like glass. The girl was beautiful, you just wish you looked like her.
Getting up off the bed, you walked into the kitchen and put your chips away, grabbing a glass of water instead to wash down the glass. After finishing, you set the now empty glass on the counter and run your fingers through your hair with a sigh.
You walked into the living room, stopping in the middle of it, looking at the weights and yoga mat in the corner of the apartment.
"I really need to lose weight" you sigh again. No matter what you do, no matter what gym you go to, no matter what you eat, and no matter what workouts you try to do, you just can't seem to lose the pudge on your tummy or any weight on your thighs. Having choso help you target different areas on your body while working out has made you feel a little better- like you were trying- and you appreciate him for being so supportive, but alas, here you were.
You roll your eyes and walk into your shared bedroom. You look around the room in search of any entertainment. After a minute, your eyes fixate on the new bags of clothes that sit on your vanity. They were so cute, Choso helped you pick them. Frilly skirts, cute crop tops, a couple dresses, short skirts, and so much more. You smile and walk over to the bags, beginning to go through them.
You pull out a baby pink, spaghetti strapped top that has the cutest design ever. You're about to try it on before your insecurities cloud your mind once more.
my arms are too big for this..
You inhale deeply and clench your jaw, setting the article of clothing back in its bag before pulling out another. A white, short lace ruffle skirt. you remember choso picking it out for you.
"This would compliment your legs so well baby, put it in the pile, I'll buy it"
You smile at the recent memory, you go to slide your underwear down your legs, as you're only wearing one of choso's baggy shirts and panties, but before you can do that, another insecurity pops up, making you huff in frustration.
the stretch marks on my thighs are gonna ruin how pretty the skirt is.
You groan and throw the skirt back to the vanity and sit down on the edge of the bed. your thoughts now running wild. You promised yourself you wouldn't do this anymore, yet here you were, walking over to the mirror on your sliding closet doors and lifting up the shirt, observing your body. Your eyes pick apart every. single. fragment of your figure, and your mind degrades them.
My thighs are too big, my stretch marks are so deep, my stomach is too flabby, my arms are too fat
You pick yourself apart while looking in the mirror. just as you're about to degrade yourself again, you let choso's shirt go and it dangles down past your mid thigh.
You walk over to the bed and sit on the edge, your head in your hands as your eyes start to sting and you chew on the skin of your bottom lip until it bleeds.
Choso bubbles in excitement when he approaches the front door, excited to finally be home with his love. He's so happy to spend the rest of the day with you he impatiently opens the door and closes it behind him.
"Y/n, babydoll i'm home!" his voice echos off the walls of the apartment before its silent once more. Silent apart from the little sniffles coming from your bedroom. His smiling face falters at the sound, setting his phone, wallet, and keys down on the couch before pushing the door to the room open.
He sees you, sitting in the middle of the bed with your knees in your face and your hair a mess. His heart breaks a little at the sight. You hear the door open and instantly look up with tears running down your plump cheeks and a pout on your lips. Choso's emotions match yours, but his are a little more angry.
Its not anger directed at you, he could never be angry with his little princess, he's angry with whatever has upset you, and he's going to find the root of whatever it is, and terminate that. Even if it's a person, he doesn't give a fuck.
You instantly wipe your tears and give him a fake smile, trying to pretend you were okay. He frowns at you and walks over to the bed in front of you.
"I didn't hear you come in, how was your day cho?" you smile at him again. He can tell it's fake because your eyes scrunch up whenever your smile is genuine. He crosses his toned arms over his broad chest and looks down at you. Your smile falters just a hair as you stare back at him.
"mine was fine, how was yours." He says, his voice full of questions.
"mine was okay, I took a nap earlier" you replied, not looking away from him. He raises an eyebrow at your clear lie and tilts his head to the side.
"enough. what's wrong y/n." he demands an answer. your eyes widen as you take a sharp inhale and look around the room, anywhere but choso. you sit criss cross in the middle of the bed and your arms move slowly to hug yourself, your eyes stinging again. Choso looks around the room to find anything that could have upset you, and his eyes land on the bags of clothes that were obviously rummaged through and he puts two and two together, his attitude changing instantly as he turns to face you.
"oh honey" is all he says and your crying all over again. you bring your hands to your face and cover your eyes, crying into your palms as your loving boyfriend shuffles onto the bed to sit behind you, wrapping you in his arms and bringing you closer. You shuffle away from him uncomfortably as his arms are wrapped around your tummy.
Choso sighs at your actions and forces you to sit on his lap, your back flush against his chest. he brings his head to rest on your shoulders and gives you feather light kisses on your neck and cheeks. You guys sit like that for a while, you crying as he holds you through your breakdown.
"I just- feel like- im too heavy for you- im so big-" you hiccup out a sob before continuing
"im so ugly- my body is ugly and- and my stretch marks are so unflat- unflattering-" another hiccuped sob escapes your throat
"you're so- handsome and so strong- there are so many- other girls- skinnier and prettier girls- you could be with anybody you want and- and you chose me" you're cries got quieter as you bring your soaked hands away from your face, rubbing on choso's shirt your wearing.
Choso shakes his head in disbelief and forces your body to face him. He moves a strand of hair out of your face and cups your cheek, forcing your face to his, but your eyes avoid contact with his.
"look at me baby" his words soft and gentle. You shake your head and close your eyes, disobeying him.
"I said look at me, y/n." Choso's stern voice came back. He only does that whenever he absolutely needs you to listen to him, or when you're having sex. Right now, he needs you to hear his words. Your eyes fly open at his tone of voice, knowing he's serious. you look into his eyes that are filled with unlimited amounts of love, you could get lost in them.
"you listen to me baby, understand?" his stern voice never faltering and it makes a chill run down your spine as you nod your head. He smiles at you softly and looks at the entirety of your face.
"good girl" his tone softens and it makes you feel more at ease. he looks deeply into your eyes as he continues.
"you are so unbelievably beautiful, you just don't see yourself that way. everything about you is perfect. your face," he kisses your cheeks and eyelids, making a small giggle bubble up out of your throat and it makes choso smile hearing your soft laugh.
"your mind" he kisses your forehead.
"and even your body." he looks you up and down, drinking in the sight of you in his shirt. You shift uncomfortably under his gaze and he takes notice of your action, trailing his hands up your thighs and around your waist, and to your surprise, you let him do so. He lifts you up and forces you to sit on his lap facing him.
"you are so perfect, I wish I could give you my eyes so you could see just how perfect you truly are" his breath fans your face as you look up to the freakishly big man, your hands dangle at your sides. he cups your cheeks with both of his hands, caressing the warm skin with his thumbs.
"you are not, and you never will be too big for me. I don't care what size you are, big or small, you will always be my babydoll." he kisses your forehead, your nose, and then your lips before pulling away from you.
"I don't want any of those other girls, you are the only one for me, and you're the only girl I need. you are so much more than them, everything about you is. I love you for you, your body is just a plus, and I love it." you smile at him softly, dragging your hands up and down his strong arms, feeling his muscles under your fingertips. you stare into his loving eyes, but they falter once more when a thought comes into your mind. Choso moves one of his hands down to cup the back of your neck, rubbing it, and the other settles itself on your thigh, caressing the tender skin.
"cho,, i dont.. i dont deserve you.." choso shakes his head, moving his arms down to push you further into his body, your chest almost flushed against his.
"you, my precious girl, are perfect for me. I don't want it any other way." you sniffle at his words, wrapping your arms around his neck and burry your face into his chest, getting as close to him as possible. choso wraps his arms around your frame, one hand cupping the back of your head and stroking your hair, the other rubbing small circles on your back.
"shh, its okay baby, you're okay. my pretty girl, my beautiful love, my sweet baby" his words of reassurance bring you comfort, calming you down. he brings his head to the crook of your neck, littering your skin in soft kisses. your hold on him falters as you pull away, he repeats your actions and leans back ever so slightly to look at you.
"I love you." his breath fans your face, you look into him, stare into him really. your face turns the slightest shade of pink at his words.
"im serious, y/n. I love you, with my entire existence I love you." he cups your head once more, and you can't help it. you lean in just a hair and kiss him, deeply. you kiss him so intentently, trying to show him how much you love him. he hums into your mouth, moving his hands down to your waist, and for the first time in what seems like months, you don't flinch away from his touch, nor do you feel like you're too much. his huge hands swallow your figure. no matter how big you think you are, he will always be able to make you feel so small and loved. he adjusts you even closer onto him, your bodies now pressed against one another.
his hands wonder your body, rubbing your back, waist, and thighs. he loves touching you, its his favorite thing to do. he wants to explore every crevice of your body as if its his first time. you always make him feel like he's floating on a cloud, a drunk, happy cloud. your arms around his neck push him closer into you, arching your back as if that would help you dissolve into his body in order to become one person, your tongue licks the bottom of his lip and he opens his mouth, teeth and tounges colliding in a sloppy kiss. choso pulls his head away a couple centimeters from yours and looks at you. he observes your pink cheeks and full lips, biting the inside of his cheek before he speaks.
"let me show you how much I love you y/n, let me show you how beautiful you are" he leans his forehead on yours in the middle of his plea, closing his eyes as he breathes in, slowly losing his restraint. you're already driving him crazy and all the two of you did was kiss.
"will you let me show you how crazy you make me?" you nod your head and within a fraction of a second, choso is pressing your body against his as he flips you over onto your back, hovering over you. one of his hands caressing your thighs as you pull him into kiss you, paying no mind the cold jewelry pierced into his lip. the other holds himself up above your frame, resting above your head. this kiss is far more passionate, your hands tangle in his dark hair as he spreads your legs with his hand, grinding his clothed dick against your needy center. you whine into his mouth at the contact and he takes the opportunity to sneakily push his tongue into your mouth, exploring.
his grinding is slow and sensual, making you needy and wet. he bites your bottom lip softly before detaching himself, hovering over to look at you. he stands up off the bed and takes his shirt off, throwing it on your vanity. his black shirt oddly complimenting your pink skin care and eyeshadow pallets. he grabs your ankles and pulls you to the edge of the bed so your legs dangle off the sides. you squeal at his actions followed by a giggle. he smiles down at you as the sound of your laughter bubble out of your throat, echoing inside the chambers of his skill.
his tattoo's are on full display, and your mouth waters. he's so attractive, especially with the way he looks at you. sinful, yet so loving. he's admiring you as if you were his most prized possession, and to him you were. his hands find their way to the hem of his shirt you're wearing, and he slowly starts undressing you.
"I love it when you wear my clothes, but I love taking them off of you even more." he says looking directly into your eyes, his hands brush your sides so lightly, it makes you shriek, laughing as he pauses in confusion.
"that tickled !" if smiles could kill, he'd be a dead man. you look so precious when you're bubbly and happy. he wants nothing more than to make you smile like that every second of every day for the rest of his life. and he plans to.
Choso doesn't move, he just stares at you. a smile plastered on his lips matching yours. he looks all up and down your body, admiring all your curves. the tiger stripe-like stretch marks make his mouth water. the pudge of your tummy perfect in his eyes- but he wouldn't mention it to you because he knows how much you dislike that part of you- even though he finds it sexy. the way there is so much more of you to love.
"I love you"
this time, you can feel just how deep those words are, a pout on your lips and you feel like crying all over again. not because of your insecurities, those are pushed to the back of your mind. but because the man before you single handedly just made you feel so loved and complete in a way you've never felt before.
"I love you"
he takes in a couple more seconds of your innocent, loving look before he shakes his head with a low chuckle, continuing to lift the shirt off of you completely, throwing it in the same direction he did his own shirt.
now, you sit on the bed completely naked apart from the lacy purple panties, causing choso to suck in a breath at the sight.
his favorite color
He smiles to himself, walking up to you, standing in in-between your legs.
He looks down at you, grabbing your jaw in his hands and making you look up at him. he tounges one of his lip piercings before speaking
"you're so unbelievably gorgeous, baby. such pretty girl." he leans down, his grip on your face held in place as he whispers
"too bad i'm about to ruin you, hm?" you shiver as he stands back up, a shit eating grin on his face as you clamp your thighs together. he leans back down, his hands on either side of your body as his lips find yours in a slow, deep kiss. you sigh into him once you feel one his hands on your inner thigh, tracing its way upwards to your core. His lips detach from yours with a wet 'pop'
"spread your legs for me sweetheart" you happily oblige, spreading your thighs apart enough for his hand to make contact with your clothed pussy. he runs his long fingers down the slit of your cunt, feeling how needy you already are.
"so wet already? all for me?" he taunts, and you can feel the smirk on his face through the tone of his voice, not even needing to look at him. you whimper at his words, moving your hands to his back, holding onto him. his fingers pinpoint your clit, drawing slow circles on the bundle of nerves, making yet another deep whimper escape your mouth. his forehead is now pressed against yours, watching the moans spill from your lips as your eyes close. he pushes your underwear to the side, the pads of his fingers now massaging your bare clit.
he's slow and concentrated, making sure you feel the pleasure he brings you throughout your entire body. one particular swipe over your clit has you closing your thighs around his hand, and he doesn't like that very much.
his hand disappears and you fling your eyes open, only to see choso slowly get down on his knees in front of you. he takes his hands and places them on your knees, forcing your thighs far apart.
"if you can't keep your legs spread apart for me, looks like 'm gonna have to keep them open myself" his hands reach for your panties, pulling them down your knees and past your ankles, discarding them across the room. his hands reposition themselves back onto your knees, keeping them spread apart, barring your pussy, open and right in front of his face.
He hums at the sight, drinking in the view of your wet clit and slightly throbbing hole. he stands up, and slowly pushes you down onto your back, laying down. he mimics your actions, coming down and hovering over you, holding himself up on one of his arms, the other tracing small patterns on the inside of your thigh. he kisses your lips deeply, you hum into his mouth, your hands coming to wrap around his neck holding him closer. his lips detach from yours and he starts kissing your neck, leaving the prettiest shade of his favorite color all over your skin. his kisses trail down your collarbones, teeth scraping against your skin as tiny moans and whines drip from your lips.
choso makes his way down to your breasts, looking at your perky nipple and oh how he could spend hours upon hours sucking, biting and playing with your breasts, but now isn't the time, so he decides to kiss it once, then twice before kissing it softly, the cool metal of his lip rings pressing into your flesh. he wraps his lips around your sensitive bud and sucking directly after, pulling yet another string of moans out of your throat. he chuckles into your boob, his free hand coming to fondle with the other, picking and pulling your nipple.
"oh my god- c-cho" you whine, your hands coming up to his spikes hair and tugging on his pony tails. his sucking gets more aggressive as does his hand, but you can't help yourself from moaning into him, arching your back. after a minute of assaulting your boobs, he sits up slightly, your nipple still being bit, and it draws a small hiss of pain out of you before he detaches himself.
he chuckles at your reaction, kissing your skin once more down your sternum and to your stomach and abdomen. he kisses the plump flesh, resting his head on your tummy and looking up at you, admiring you and your body.
"you're so beautiful" he says, making a dark pink plush rise to color your cheeks you smile down at him, not needing any words in that moment.
choso proceeds with his kisses down your stomach, finishing off with a kiss directly above your clit, face to face with your heat, his breath fanning your pussy as he speaks.
"god, everything about you really is perfect, look at your pussy baby" he says, bragging to himself, thoughts of how lucky he is to have such a breathtaking woman. before you had the chance to look, the feeling his warm tongue on your clit has you yelping in surprise. he looks up at you, your face contorting into one of pleasure.
Choso licks a couple stripes up your slit before focusing on your clit, sucking harshly enough for another yelp to bounce off the walls. his teeth bite down. a sharp, pleasurable sensation that sends vibrations throughout your entire body. you lay on your back, but choso doesn't take his eyes off of you.
his mouth does wonders on your throbbing clit, his tongue fast and relentless as he eats you out. your juices drip down his chin, but he doesn't care. as a matter of fact, he can't get enough. so he wraps his arms around your thighs and pulls your pussy even farther into his face, drowning himself in your pussy. you gasp at the sudden movement, but moans of pleasure follow directly after. you sit up on your forearms as you watch your boyfriend completely devour you.
you feel the coil in your stomach approaching quickly, a knot about to snap. your legs shake in his hold and your whines grow louder. Choso's sinister laugh is swallowed by your pussy, but you were still able to hear it.
his sucking becomes harsher as you approach your fast growing orgasm. you throw your head back in ecstasy and there are tears in your eyes. its been such a long time since he's eaten you out so you're much more sensitive than normal, and he can tell.
"ch-cho-so please, need- plea, need to-"
"cum for me pretty, you can do it sweet girl" he interrupts your please of release and not even a second later, your creaming all over his face, painting his nose and chin in your fluids.
"so good for me hmm" he says into your clit as the motions on your clit come to a slow hault, making sure you come down from your orgasm at a smooth pace. your body is limp, but he's nowhere close to being done with you.
his mouth leaves your heat and he gently puts your legs down as you sit up on your forearms weakly. you see him undoing his belt buckle and his pants hitting the floor, his boxers following. his dick is hard as it slaps against his abdomen. you remember how tall and muscular he is, so his dick was to be big too, you just dont remember very well its been so long. his arms move towards your body, and you feel him lift your hips up and grab your ass. you sit up fully so you're facing him completely.
"hold onto me sweetheart" he says and you wrap your arms around his neck as he lifts you into the air, your legs wrapping around his waist; picking you up into the air as if you were as light as a feather. you feel his dick prodding at your entrance as he carries you over to the sliding mirror of your closet.
choso throws you into the air slightly so your legs fall from his waist with a yelp dripping from your lips. He catches you and spins your body around so the both of you are looking at your reflections. one of his arms wraps around your body under your arm, his hand coming to your throat, wrapping his fingers around your neck, a couple landing on the base of your jaw as he forces you to look into the mirror at the two of you. his other hand sneakily pushes your hips back against his front, your ass pressed against his dick as he grinds into you from behind.
"look at yourself baby, such a pretty thing you are, my angel, I can't believe how lucky I am." he kisses the back of your head. looking at yourself, you see how well the both of you fit together, how small you look when you're next to him. you actually feel pretty for once.
"god, its like you were made for me. you look so pretty like this baby. my beautiful darling" he speaks into your ear. you whine, needing him, throbbing for him.
"choso please, I need- please" you beg him and he smiles, looking up through his stray hairs in his face, making eye contact with you through the mirror
"please what, angel?" he asks, teasing you. it feels like you're going to explode with need, you can't take it any longer.
"please fuck me, please I need you, I want you please-" he cuts you off by hooking his arm under your knee, lifting your feet off the ground, your legs now dangling in the air. His other hand still wrapped around your throat. Even though what he's doing is dangerous, and you've never done something like this before, he's gentle with you. Your air supply is cut off slightly as he lifts you into the air, your back pressed against his chest so you're not completely hanging.
Choso walks forward, pressing your breasts and chest into the mirror. his hand that's hooked under your dangling leg presses against the mirror, making sure he has a good grip against the glass to make sure you don't slip from his hold. his chest still pressing up against your back, using his body as leverage to hold you up in the air.
"cho-so wait-" your worried tone reaches his ears and he kisses your cheek
"its okay pretty, I got you, I wont let you fall I promise" he reassures you, and his words ease your mind. this position is new- and scary- to you, but you trust your lover, so you let him continue. with the arm that choso has his arm wrapped under yours and gripping your throat, you move your hand to rest on his forearm, your other coming to press against the mirror for a reassuring grip.
You feel his dick at your entrance, the position lining you up perfectly. choso slowly sinks you down as he thrusts up into you, bottoming out inside you completely. choso's whine mixed with a low groan fills your ears as you whimper into the mirror, arching your back.
"oh god, you're so tight 'nd warm, fuck you drive me insane" you hiss loudly at the familiar stretch, but your pain is quickly overridden by pleasure as he continues thrusting inside of you from behind, bouncing your body up against the mirror, your boobs still jiggling and nipples hard against the glass.
Your moans grow louder as the position he's fucking you in helps him reach deeper angles inside of you, hitting your sweet spot over and over again. your dangling legs start shaking, your bodies beginning to sweat against each other as choso moans and groans into your ear, his breath hitting your skin. your fingernails did into the skin of his tattooed arm and you lean your head back into his chest, looking up at his face. Moans and whimpers drip off the both of your lips, the sweetest tune coming together in harmony.
"f-fuck ch-cho pl-please to- much ag-" your hiccuped moans cause him to chuckle into your ear, a deep, sinister sound that makes you squeeze around his cock.
"you're takin' me so well, f-fuck baby, 'm gonna fill you so full, fuck my pretty angel so full of my cum, bet you'd like that yeah?" he speaks directly into your ear, your pussy fluttering around his dick, squeezing and unsqueezing him so tightly, he could come at any second- but he holds back. your guys' mixed juices spill onto the floor below you, dripping down your leg and coating his balls and abdomen. the only sound in the room is skin slapping and moans, disgusting and needy moans.
His thrusts inside you are relentless, his cock driving up into you, his tip brushing up against your sweetest spot repeatedly, causing you to draw out the sweetest of sound that are choso's most favorite song. your legs are thrashing now, his grip on your throat tightening.
"'m so- clo-se ch-o please I can't, please let me cum- please!' your broken begs for release go ungranted to choso.
"hold it." his command stern as he pulls away from the mirror, you still in his hold as curses under his breath. He walks over to the bed, throwing you onto it with ease. He crawls around you, perching himself behind you as spins you onto your knees- ass up. He gently grabs your hips with one hand, the other grabbing a fistful of your hair, making you look into the mirror, right at your guys' reflection.
"this-" he thrusts his hard dick back inside your tight cunt "is my most favorite place in the world." without letting you go, he leans down and kisses your cheek, your mouth slack open in a beautiful "oh" shape and your eyes roll back into your skull.
his thrusts pick up the pace, his hips snapping against the flesh of your ass turning it red. the hand on your hips sneaks down and around you to rub your clit. a small yelp bouncing off the walls, your hands gripping the sheets below you.
"oh fuck, oh my god, I love you, I love you so much" choso's praisely perfect whines sends electric shocks straight to your clit as it pulsates into his fingers.
"you were made for me angel, so perfect, prettiest girl ive ever laid my eyes on- shit" he's looking at your face in the mirror, and if he could, he would tattoo that shit onto him- and he's actually considering it, because you look like the most beautifully disgusting painting he's ever created, fucking you as if it was the last time.
you were such a beautiful mess, all for him, created for him. he really was crazy about you. especially when he was making you and your pussy scream in pleasure- and that's exactly what he's doing.
"you're so pretty darling, drivin' me so crazy" you can't help but mewl at his words, feeling like you were on the edge of explosion. He can tell by the look on your face and the way your pussy begins to milk his cock. his grip tightens in your hair and leans down, biting your earlobe
"look at me sweetheart, look at me when I stuff you full of my cum and breed you like the pretty little whore you are"
your eyes fly open, looking directly into his. he sits up, lets go of your hair, and both of his hands come to grip the skin of your hips, his ruthless thrusts snapping against your ass are forceful as your moans turn into the most beautiful screams.
"takin' my cock so well, gon' take my cum next, how does that sound pretty?"
with one final thrust, you cream all over his cock with a moan, squeezing and fluttering all around him as he shoots white hot ropes of him cum deep inside you, throwing his head back with a loud groan. he pushes his hips farther into you, making sure you take all of him.
your cum leaks down your thighs as well as his, your legs shaking. if it weren't for the tight grip on your hips, you would have collapsed onto the bed by now.
He loosens his grip on you, gently pulling his softening dick out of your pussy. he puts you down on the bed softly and flips you over on your back and crawls on top of you, one of his hands coming to flatten your hair down and massage your sweaty face.
He cups your cheek and kisses your lips tenderly, then your cheeks, forehead, eyelids, and then your nose. his eyes gaze into yours with admiration and love, and you can't help but reciprocate.
"I really do wish you could see yourself the way I do, sweetheart. beautiful-" he kisses your nose again
"kind-" your forehead
"and perfect" he kisses your lips, his thumb caressing your cheek.
"I love you, choso"
"I love you, angel"
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Diet Diaries
Hi all! Thank you so much for 500 followers! Here's a little style switch up to celebrate, got a lotta refs in this one and I quite leaned into the diary entries so I hope it's not too much! Hope y'all enjoy this stereotype reversal and as always, best! -Occam
Monday March 21st-
Andy:
I am beyond sick of Steve. Moving in together was a mistake, I don’t care how cheap the rent is, he is a narcissistic slob and I am eager to never see him again. Well no, I shouldn’t get ahead of myself. Our R.A. had this idea to try and walk in each other's shoes, which I don’t know? It might not be the worst thing? My big idea was switching diets actually- honestly I’m just hoping if he ate more like me he’ll stop stinking up the dorm. I can dream at least. Literally though he just can’t go to the gym as often if he eats like me. If I'm lucky at the very least his deodorant will last longer, I cannot take another day of his b.o. seeping through the walls, ugh! Anyway, wish me luck! I’m sure this will be a breeze for me, he usually just eats junk anyway, hope he enjoys my salads~
Steve:
Andy that little fucker. He was being such a little bitch to James and now I’ve gotta eat his rabbit food for a week or lose this bet or whatever. Steve don’t lose tho. Lil twink’s gotta eat whatever I make him too and you can bet your ass I’m gonna make him match my macros if I’ve gotta starve myself like he wants. Fuck! This shit is going to absolutely tank my routine! I’ve gotta make Andy give up. I’m gonna go so hard on him he’ll have to hit weights if he doesn't want to blow up like a pig. Maybe then he’ll stop bitching any time I don’t fucking shower every time I get back home.
Tuesday March 22nd-
Andy:
My Lord! He is trying to kill me! I don’t know how anyone could consistently eat as much as he’s telling me to. I’m so bloated from all this food.. He looks so smug every time he tells me to keep eating, I’m sure he doesn’t eat like this. He’s just trying to break me but I’m not going to let him win this easy.
Ugh, I feel so bloated my pants are so tight on my waist. I didn’t think meat sweats were a thing but man I am needing to put on deodorant like twice a day now and I’m not even exercising. I will say that now that I’m eating so much, I don’t hate the idea of going to the gym. It’s been a while since I went but I should probably at least hit up the treadmill lest I get even more of a gut- maybe I’ll see if he wants to go tomorrow. This is all just an exercise to understand each other more after all, no need to make it a stupid competition like he wants eh~
Steve:
Fuck! I am so tired of Andy’s pussy-ass diet. I had absolutely no energy at the gym today, I told all my bros that I was just gonna take it easy but fuck! I really was working my ass off and I struggled to even meet a PR I set last week. It was supposed to be a push day and I didn’t even get a chest pump! Why the fuck am I still going. I’m abso-fucking-lutely not getting gains on his fuckin’ bitch-ass salads and oats.
Eatin’ like a fucking twink and the fucker has the nerve to ask to go to the gym with me tomorrow. I’ll make sure he regrets that >:) Gonna work him like a horse so he’ll throw in the towel! After feeling how sore actually working on yourself makes ya, he might actually learn something. I’ll turn in early so I can go all out and show him what a real man looks like.
Wednesday March 23rd-
Andrew:
Man! I totally get why Steven eats so much now~ I am absolutely raring to go and get this; He said I could go to the gym with him today! He even seemed like he wanted me to go with him! I feel like I have more energy than I’ve ever had before, I might even try some weights!! I don’t know but I’m so excited! It’s like I can feel my chest and biceps begging me to go and hit some iron haha! Or whatever those “bros” say~ I hope he’s got something good planned for lunch because I fuck Sorry! I just want to show him that I can do all this dude stuff too! I’m a man right? I guess all this protein is making me feel more like a man than usual idk. Either way though I’m ready to go! Hope we have some fun!
Steven:
That bitch’s fuckin’ fru fru salads are ruining my PR’s for sure! I bet he knew that when he begged me to take him to the gym today, knew it was the only time he could show off to me was when I’m so out of it. And he didn't! Just to be clear I could still wipe the floor with him even if I’m not at my A-game. Ugh, I do gotta hand it to the little fucker though. I KNOW he hasn’t even really set foot in a gym before but man. Beginners luck my ass, as soon as I showed him a technique he lifted like he’s been doing it his whole life! It’s like I could see his pecs and tris swelling up with each lift. Not that I was staring at the bitch or anything but he’s just I just need this fuckin’ diet thing to end so I can get back to my grind, I guess I wouldn’t hate taking him to the gym more often, would be hot to make a bitch into a bro Fuck! What am I writing, I just need to lift again.
Thursday March 24th-
Andrew:
Bro! Weird? Whatever, I am absolutely on fire! Steven’s diet is absolutely killer! I don’t know how it’s working so well but man I couldn’t care less, I felt like a pro in there! My coaches in school would always shit on me for not trying but man! I was barely trying yesterday but I could tell from the look on Steven’s face that I was acing it! I guess I’ll have to admit to him that he is definitely onto something with his macros but man, not until he gives up haha! Man, I need to chill haha, it’s not like I’m any stronger than I was Monday but man, looking at myself in the mirror it just seems like my clothes are just fitting better. Catching on my chest rather than my stomach y’know? I’ve never noticed that there is muscle on my arms before but man the way my sleeves are kinda hugging my biceps mm. I need to chill haha! Can’t use all my energy before hitting the gym again today!
OH! Also totally weird, I’ve had to shave twice this week! Once last night and then again this morning which is so weird! I’m not complaining though, it’s not like I wouldnt look hot with a beard right? Although my face is a little itchy already, my chest too? Whatever though haha! Time to head back to the grind lol!
Steven:
God!! Andy Andrew is being such an asshole! He’s clogging the sink shaving which I know he would so be on my ass if I had done that. Wait, he did get on my ass for shaving! But it hasn’t been a problem this week, it’s like I’m not even growing stubble for some reason? Probably from not working so hard at the gym, is that how that works? Whatever it’ll be over as soon as this stupid diet thing is. We’re halfway through now. Thank God! Because that fucking twink is starting to stink up the dorm which again!! He was such a little bitch all the time to me about that! It’s like he’s literally stopped using deodorant as soon as he started needing it! He’s never exerted himself in his life and now that his pits are sweating at all he’s suddenly allergic to hygiene, ugh! I saw last night too the fucker fell asleep with his head in his pit too so it’s not like he doesn’t know it.
It was a little surprising actually, cause I would’ve sworn he was hairless like one of those freak cats but man his pit was as thick as my pubes! Thicker maybe, uh? Man I wish I could get that image out of my head, it’s like the tuft was pushing out further each time he inhaled, man that’s kinda hot? Fuck! I swear this twink-ass diet is making me think like him too. I need to sneak to the gym later, without him. I cannot have him getting ahead even while I’m still on his chickenshit diet.
Friday March 25th-
Steven:
Ah!! That Little bitch! He was already at the gym when I got there! Ugh! It makes me want to punch a wall, or fight him. Or something I dont know! It’s just, he was lifting my body weight on the bench when he saw me, it was so ho ugh! It doesn’t matter what it was, I can’t stop thinking of that smug look on his face- what I would give to wipe it off… That absolute prick knew what he was doing. Ugh, speaking of pricks! He may as well have not been wearing shorts at all by how much his cock was showing through them.
I knew my meal prepping was fucking tight but man, I can’t believe hot its made him. It just really fucking turns me on, or no its such a turn on for chicks. Yeah. Whatever. I need this bet to end already. Clearly he’s totally obsessed with my lifestyle so he should just admit it already! Also, hate to say it, but to Andrew’s credit his diet ain't too bad either. I’d never tell him this, and it is all a little emasculating but my skin has never looked this good. I’m not even doing skincare or anything but it’s like I’ve been on a routine for years, it’s crazy! It’s still ruining my upper gains but man, my ass looks so good it's crazy..
Oh also re: facial hair, I woke up this morning and could’ve sworn I used to have chest hair but now it looks like I’ve got just a little left around my nipples and leading up from my pubes? I might go ahead and shave those too, might as well be totally smooth like a chick right haha, I wonder what Andrew would think? I need to chill haha, maybe I’ll go see if he’s still at the gym~
Andrew:
Fuuuuck dude lol. I should’ve started hitting up the gym ages ago. Don’t know what I was even wasting time on before I started doing twice-a-days? Studying I guess but I can figure that shit stuff out hm. Fuck it is so much better to be strong than a dweeb. Every set it feels like I’m just busting out new PR’s! Gonna need to buy new clothes though cause I am absolutely tearing up my crop tops, my twinky little wardrobe just isn’t cutting it anymore. Maybe Steven’d be down for a clothes swap, I’ve seen him eying up my fits all week, god knows he’ll fit them better lol. Oh haha, and speaking of him eying things up >:) You should’ve seen his little face blush when he walked into the gym this morning! He looked so pissed at me lol, but I’m not gonna grab him to come along every time I need to get some sets in right? It was pretty embarrassing for him yesterday anyway, the way I showed him up lol. I’m not just gonna sit around and watch him not lift weights when I can figure this shit out myself, thought it was supposed to be his thing though lol.
Mm, saying that though, I def didn’t hate having a little audience from his treadmill. God, his blushing face as he stared directly at my work-out chub. Fuck, it really got me going. It really helped my sets too haha. Maybe I should hit him up lol, I can tell how bad he wants me >:)
Saturday March 26th-
Stevie:
Ugh! That douche is walking around the dorm completely shirtless! Do you know what it’s like to have an oaf flexing away across the room from you 24/7! He knows what he’s doing, and thank god my dick isn’t showing through my shorts like I thought it usually does because he might literally pounce on me then-
Ugh! I didn’t even mention this morning. I literally woke up to him jacking off his morning wood! Do you know what a bitch-fit he would have thrown if I did that! He would’ve filed a police report, probably the dweeb, or. I guess I could too?? But it was just so fucking hot. I tried to pretend I was asleep, but he totally caught me. He literally smirked and made eye contact as he finished too- thank god he didn’t see my boner as he asked if I wanted to clean up his mess. He’s such an ass!
I still have a boner now actually, it’s his B.O. driving me actually crazy! It’s like I can’t think near him if he’s going to stink this bad god.. Oh, he’s doing pullups on the door frame fuck. He’s supposed to be hairless but I see sweat dripping from his pits god I can't. God with each pull up his chest looks even more powerful. His cock is bobbing up and down in his pants and I can not look away. Fuck it’s getting even bigger. I’m supposed to be the strong one right? It’s not, fuck. This isn’t right. He just so fucking, god that body, I need him-
And Drew:
Heh. I knew that fucking twink couldn’t resist me. Every little thing I do wraps him even tighter around my finger. Every flex and smirk turns him on even more I bet he can’t even think straight the way his little dick is losing it in his briefs- I took all his jocks since I’m sure he would need them anymore. Bet the little bitch didn’t even remember they were his.
Might as well have been drooling when he saw me jacking my cock this morning lol, surprised he didn’t take me up on the offer to lick up the mess. I know he wanted to lol. He’ll get the chance soon enough though >:) God it’s a two-way street though. That fucking twink is so fuckable now, thank god he doesn’t need to shave anymore, don’t want his peachfuzz scratching my cock cause god that mouth is so fuckable now.. To say nothing of his fucking juicy ass, god! I’ve been working out in the room all morning waiting for him to give in and ask me to fuck him, idk if I can hold it in much longer. I might need to jack it again, my balls are bluer than I ever thought they could be, fuck. It’s like they're sore. Ugh I feel them getting heavier, heh, that little fucker cant resist though. God I feel precum starting to pool in my jock. If I put my pit within a foot of his face I give him five before he can’t help but shove his face in. I need to fuck him, but as if I’m going to let him see how desperate I am. Stevie that little fucker. He’ll be riding my cock any second now.
Sunday March 27th-
Stevie:
Fuck <3 !! He finally fucked me!! God, it was like nothing I’ve experienced before~ His cock was like a beer can and goddd the scratch of his beard as we were making out.. Hehe if I keep thinking about him I might just cum again right now! He can fully toss my body like a ragdoll and I’d thank him ugh! He’s just so hot, and to think he wants to fuck me!! Ah~ I’ll need to keep myself pretty so he won’t get tired of me hehe! Not that it’ll be a problem, I just need to keep on his diet, God who knew it would be this good! I don’t even remember whatever problems we had before all this and I can’t imagine anything better than getting fucked by him <3 Ah! He he~ He’s staring at my ass right now so I guess it’s time for another round! Can’t thank our R.A. enough for this idea, well he he I’ve got an idea for how to thank him, oh! Drew’s ripped off his jock! Wish me luck he he~
Drew:
My little bitch is so tight, fuck. I’m surprised he can even take my cock but god can he ride it. Gonna have a hard time taking a break from fucking him to even hit the gym. Need to make sure the twink keeps up the diet tho or we’ll have an issue. Be sure to make him come to the gym whenever I do, if not to tighten up then to watch me heh. Won’t hate fucking him in the locker room too. Mm, God his fucking tiny body makes me feel so powerful. And I fucking am. God my bis are the size of his thick thighs, fuck his ass. My cock is straining my jock just thinking about it. His tiny waist ugh, I need my sweaty body over him now. Not like he’ll mind, the horny fucker. Mmm hope he’s ready to take my cock, bet his mouth is already watering heh. Pop my pecs at him and he’ll struggle not to cum on the spot, he better keep it together until I let him though. Can’t be having my bitch blow his load that fast. Thank fuck he’s chilled out finally, though I guess my cock’ll work wonders on anyone >:) speaking of it’s about that time again. Hope he’s ready for some more action, hate to have to find another hole.
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Year 3:
Now that I think about it, football has been a constant in my life for five years now. I’m not sure if I enjoy football anymore; it used to be about the fun we have passing the ball, now it’s all about the stats or the perfect form.
I stood up from the bleachers to hand Brad his towel.
“I’m going to leave the team, Brad,” I said.
“What? Where did this come from?” He said frantically.
“Everyone knows I’m still on the team because you’re the team’s captain now,” I said.
“I don’t want to cause tension between you and Coach. There’s nothing I could do wobbling around the field anyway,” I added.
“Dude, you know I started playing football because of you, right?” Brad said.
“Bradley, relax. I’m not dead. You can come over to my house whenever you want.” I said.
“Theo can make you some lemon pudding cakes if you want to come,” hopefully this will calm him.
“Fine. Just so you know, I’m not happy about this,” he said, sounding like a brat.
“Okay, got it. Have fun at the party,” I chuckled.
“I won’t. I’m going to make the DJ play Lana Del Rey,” he said before entering the locker room.
There might be an oversight of me quitting football.
It’s literally the reason why I quit. I don’t know why it never crossed my mind.
How the fuck am I going to lose weight now?
“Maybe I would’ve thought it if the word, “exercise” was anywhere on my to-do list this past year,” the voice from the back of my head said.
Shut up, rational thought. I was just a little too cocky, that’s all.
My mind spins around the paths I could take to shed the fat.
Back to the gym for the bodybuilders to laugh at me jiggling like a puddle of slime on the treadmill.
No. Hard no.
Stop eating whatever Theo puts in front of my face.
Productive, but I’d rather die than miss out on the joy of the world.
Post my weight loss journey edits on social media, reminiscing on my rock-hard abs like a depressed, fat person.
No? No, actually it might just work.
My thumbs got to work. It took me an hour to choose a profile picture that represents me. I could go for a vacation photo by the beach, or the classic black and white moody gym pic. Except, I don’t have a picture of myself on my phone, so I chose the picture of an orange cat eating a banana.
With my camera set up, in my favourite green tank top. I pressed record.
It was an embarrassing experience editing myself, watching my belly sway every time I made a movement. In the end, I closed my eyes and uploaded the video.
“Oh! First comment already.” I said.
“Look at those milkers spilling out the tanks!”
3. Post my weight loss journey edits on social media, reminiscing on my rock-hard abs like a depressed, fat person.
The following weeks consisted of me eating my feelings. At least half of my classes are online this semester. I can be embarrassed in peace.
The pounds kept creeping up with each spoon of ice cream down my throat. In the blink of an eye, I am dangerously close to 300 pounds.
I finally worked up the courage to ask during a normal family dinner.
“Honey, what happened? You’re not eating as fast as usual. Is Theo not cooking enough?” Mom asked.
“No, Mom, I just…I just hope you guys can ease up with your little cooking competitions.”
“Oh honey, you know Theo and I will stop with the food whenever you ask.” Mom tries to reassure me.
“No! Obviously don’t stop the food. It’s just that I’ve been blowing up like a pig and I don’t know what to do about it.” I said.
“I didn’t know you were sad about it. I just want my family to be happy, you look the happiest when you eat,” Mom said
“It wouldn’t have helped when you guys lost for the past two years,” Mom added.
“Well, Dad likes to eat better, and no one eats like him,” I replied.
“I’m sure my cooking was the reason we won. David is a gym teacher, he walks off the food easily,” Mom said.
“Theo is a professional though, no offence but no one on the planet cooks like him. I’m sure football was the reason we lost,” I said, trying to talk some sense into her.
Theo stares at us with wide eyes.
“Jacob, I’m sure you didn’t mean it,” Mom said with a blank face.
“You know what? Keep doing your competition, this time again next year we’ll see who’s the winner,” I said.
I am clearly a failure at losing weight. The only thing I’m good at is eating. If I’m going to gain weight anyway, I’m going to go all out and win this shit once and for all. Once this is settled, I can get back to normal. Not wanting to disappoint Theo when we lose again was probably the thing holding me back. I can’t wait to eat all the delicious things Theo is- I can’t wait for this to be over.
“Alright, Jay,” she turned to Theo and said.
“Theo, my boy. I’m looking forward to seeing the results next year,” Mom said with a determined smile.
Everyone knows not to mess with Mom when she has that look. Even then, I feel like we could still win. Theo’s food is hypnotic already when I am restrained; imagine what it will do to me when I’m going all out.
“What’s going on again?” Dad asked with cheeks full of pasta.
“Don’t worry baby, you just need to eat a little more next year,” Mom answered.
“Okay, as long as I get my lasagnas,” Dad said.
Later at night, struggling to sleep, I contemplated on the bad decisions I’ve made. This one might take the crown to be the stupidest thing I’ve done. Yet, I don’t regret it.
“You didn’t have to stand up for me,” Theo said.
“It’s the least I can do when you wake up early to prep for my food, or go off on the weekends for groceries when you could’ve been doing anything else,” I explained.
“Thank you so much, Jay. You don’t know how much this means to me. My family wanted me to do anything other than cooking, but you guys have been nothing but supportive,” he said.
I smiled at the ceiling. The gremlin is nicer than I remember.
“Now, I won’t allow you to slack anymore with the amount you’re eating. Not until the competition ends.”
Huh?
Theo had stuck to his word and increased the amount he was cooking. I am now eating the amount of three people in each spread-out meal, still lacking behind Dad’s impressive five person’s amount per meal. So I have been playing catch up with him this entire month.
I realized quickly that I had underestimated the gap between Dad and my appetite. In the last few years, for the most part, I have been eating whatever I want, leaving the rest to Dad. With the exception of eating for the team once a week, I have been slacking. That was quite a hard pill to swallow. I’m 300 pounds, yet not doing a good job as a fatass. How is that possible?
So far I have gained about 23 pounds in the past two months. Normally, I would freak out and have a breakdown in bed because I’ve gained more than my freshman year in two months. Right now with my messed up head, all I can think about is how far I am behind. If we lose this again, it would be once and for all, and I would never let myself live this down. Theo deserves better with how good he’s been treating me.
With my new bulk, the stairs have been an increasing challenge. So, a few weeks ago I moved downstairs to a tiny guest room that was converted to a storage room.
The moment I moved down, I could hear Theo’s voice yelling, “Yes, Finally! Goodbye insomnia,” In my old bedroom. Before, I would’ve yelled for the brat to shut up. Now, with my stomach full. I just wanted a nap in peace.
It took me no time to adjust to the new arrangement. With more time home from all the online classes, I get to be as lazy as I want. Dad has a similar arrangement at home. He retired from being a high school gym teacher and football coach, now he tutors history at home. He also abandoned his hobby of brewing in order to laze on the sofa all day.
On weekdays, Theo would leave an abundance of food for me to consume with a list of how I should eat them to expand my capacity. The weekends are like heaven. From the moment I woke up, Theo would prepare delicious appetizers and pancakes for me. From then on, I would have a constant stream of food flowing into my mouth every thirty minutes. Sometimes, I would move my hands and my mouth would start to chew unconsciously. Alarming, but helpful.
My belly started to expand outwards on my lap each day as I sat in front of the computer. The arm rest would feel more snug when I move around.
I have now discovered the perks of being a fatass. I can explore things I never had time to do, like the anime Brad has been begging me to watch, games I always wanted to play. Best of all is to experience all of these without moving an inch. These are the things I would definitely look back on with fondness when the competition ends.
***
Today is my rare outing of the month; the bus is late again but I don’t blame them this time. The downpour of rain is gathering at the clogged sewer, creating a puddle. People are supposed to grow out of stepping in puddles when they’re kids. These undeveloped assholes apparently didn’t. Several cars saw the puddle and decided to splash it straight to my face.
It’s fine. It’s all fine. I will feel better later.
I walked a small trail after getting off the bus.
Great. The angels decide to stop peeing from the heavens when I’m about to get inside.
Dad is buying a new SUV, maybe I can drive it next time. It’s too big to sneak off though.
I thought as I skipped through the stone pathway. The usual grass is covered by the water, creating a small pond.
“Annyeonghaseyo,” I said to the door cam.
After pressing the doorbell several times, it replied.
"안녕, fuck boy. Back so soon?" Number Seven said.
“Yeah, yeah. Just open the damn door,” I said, trying to hurry the fucker.
Number Seven’s face appears in front of me.
“You’re soaked! Come on in,” he said.
His house appears to be orderly. Clean. He must’ve had another fatass here not long ago.
“Woah, you look—Wait, let me guess. Another fifteen pounds since last time?” He asked.
“Come on, let’s cut to the chase. I really need it right now,” I urged.
“Hahaha, not even a shower. Desperate much?” He said.
I walked inside his bedroom, dimmed the lights and took off my shirt.
He walked towards me. Grabbing me by the belly hang in one hand, he pulls down my underwear, causing my ass to vibrate.
“Fuuuuck, can you take it out first?” I asked, trying not to moan.
“Sure, you think you’re ready for me today?” He asked.
“Yeah, I think so,” I answered.
He slid his hand behind, right down my ass crack and slowly pulled the vibrator off. I applied it before leaving home, without accounting for the possibility of the bus delay.
“Mmmmph, fuck,” I groaned.
I’ve been training towards today for a while. In the beginning, I would come to his house and he would suck me off. If I’m feeling experimental, I would suck him off. It stayed like that for about a year and he never complained. Then I asked him for more. He would start fucking me between my moobs or between my ass but never enter. One day, I told him I was ready for him to start fucking me.
Big mistake.
He’s a manwhore for a reason. I didn’t think an 8-inch would be so hard to take. How the girls and twinks take them in porn is beyond me. It was painful when he entered, even when he said he had “loosened my hole” with his fingers. I shouldn’t have believed him, the fucking thing was massive.
After the incident, he gave me small dildos and vibrators to get used to it. We eventually worked our way up the scale until the one he’s holding now. Why did I do all this work to have a men’s dick in my ass? Who knows. I have already accepted that I’ve lost it.
He sucked on my nipple suddenly. The sensation took me by surprise.
“Dude, some warnings please,” I asked.
“Yeah, sorry. Those tits are just so plumped. Your nipples have grown larger than my thumbs now,” he said, about to continue.
“OKAY, I get it. Can you get to work now?” I asked.
My boobs are what everyone thinks about when they see me these days. I’m sick of it.
“Hahahaha, can’t wait to be fucked, my pig?” He said before pushing me down the mattress.
I held my belly to stop it from jiggling.
He raised one of my legs and opened the bottle of lube with his teeth.
“There’s something by the pillow. Put it in your mouth. It will distract you and dull the initial pain,” Number Seven instructed.
I reached out to grab a—frosted pound cake?
I’ve never seen people doing this in porn, but I’m smart enough to know not everything in porn is real.
With my mouth full of cake, I spread out my legs, trying to relax so I don’t end up like last time.
He pushed two fingers in, slowly massaging me, then three fingers to stretch my hole. When the frosting melted in my mouth and I finished the chunk of the cake, he signalled me that he was done.
Another piece of the pound cake fills my mouth when he aligns his cock to my hole. He was right, I was fully consumed by the sweetness to notice any discomfort. I quickly swallowed the cake so he could proceed.
It was unbearably slow as he entered. I don’t understand what all the fuss is about with people bottoming.
He kept asking for reassurance. At this point I just want him to st—
“A-ahhhh oh shiiit!” I moaned.
“Fuuuuuck, what the hell was that?” I screamed.
I must have been too loud and spooked him.
“Are you alright? Sh-should I call an ambulance?” He asked.
“No! Don’t stop, please,” I begged
“Okay, just so you know, I’m not all the way in,” He said.
How? This is already longer than any toys I’ve put in there.
“Gnghhhhh~” I moaned as he thrusts all the way to the bottom.
He kept a steady pace all the way in then almost all the way out, leaving me feeling empty.
“Hurry! Faster,” I asked, almost in tears.
He looked at me with a devious smile and thrust right into the spot.
“Mphn- Yes! Keep going,” I urged.
Every small movement rubbing my G-spot feels like masturbating for hours without release.
He thrusts quicker with more force, causing my belly and moobs to shake violently.
I try to stabilize my belly with my hand before trying to reach my throbbing cock.
“Help, I-aghh fuck, I need to touch my dick,” I asked.
“Let go of your belly, fat boy. Or I’ll stop,” He said.
Immediately, my belly returned to wobble violently.
“I can’t believe you turned into such a pathetic horny mess in such a short time,” He said.
”Come on, Seven. I just need you to hit that spot. Please, I’ll do anything!” I begged.
He keeps deliberately missing it. I need to be fucked there!
“Keep your hands on your nipples,” he ordered.
The over-sensitive nipples drive my weeping cock into a frenzy.
Fuck, I need to touch my cock right now. If only my fucking belly is not on the way.
“You know, when I first saw you, I thought you were the kind of jock to gain a beer belly in college, and not get fat until you turn thirty,” he said, before ramming straight into my prostate.
“Fuuuuck yeahhh,” I said unintelligently.
“You are much more of a pig than I realized,” he said, thrusting straight into it again.
“Helll yeahhh,” I said, trying to rob my ass to his dick.
“How do you feel seeing your bubble butt balloons four times the original size?” He asked, followed by another thrust.
“I fucking love it! I love how it wobbles around whenever I walk!” I said, moving my jiggling ass back to his dick again.
“How do you feel seeing your abs growing before your eyes, knowing you could stop it if you just stop eating?”Another thrust.
“I can’t help it! I love eating too much!” Maybe I am meant to be a fat ass.
“Right answer. Now you’ll get your reward,” he said and sped up, hitting the spot perfectly every time.
I imagine his face to be someone else, someone far from my league.
My cock rubbed against my sensitive underbelly, and I shot out jets of cum for what felt like forever.
As white clouded my vision, a euphoric relief spread over my body, melting me into the mattress.
“You passing out again, fuck boy?” Seven asked.
“No, just enjoying the bliss. I can’t believe so many men in the world are missing out on this,” My hole already feels empty. How am I going to go back from this?
“Aww man, I’m all sticky and shit,” I examined my body, cum shots and rain definitely don’t mix well together. Some of them even got between the fat folds. I swipe my finger in between the fat. “Oof, I stink too.”
Seven looked at me and signed. “You’re somehow still a stupid jock inside.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” I asked.
“I got you the fast food you asked for,” he said.
“Yes!” I rushed to the kitchen.
Ignoring his stupid laugh, I microwaved the burger and fries.
The breeze of the air conditioning reminds me of something.
“Shit, I ran out here naked.”
When I ran back, he had already put my clothes in the dryer, and I got into the shower.
When I got out, Seven brought me an old shirt I left here. It fits me like a glove with half my belly exposed. He stopped laughing when I was about to throw myself on him, then brought out a shirt with the Flash’s symbol on. Probably from another fat ass he fucks. The shirt still looks painted on, revealing the shape of my nipple and the dent of my belly button. At least he’s driving me home.
***
Staying at home has been a life-altering experience.
The only time I ever move is going out of the bed to the desk, or to the bathroom. All I have to do is sit back, relax, and eat some fried food.
With more time with myself. I’ve realized how much I dislike all the people in school that only approached me because I was one of the football jocks. I could’ve been anyone. Now, I am me. Not a worry about whether or not I’m muscular enough like other jocks, just a bigger Jay.
Sitting beside me, Dad scratched his belly and released a belch without a care in the world. He has adapted to fat guy mannerisms quickly. I’m catching up too. Today is movie night, usually we have pizzas and beers. We started this when the football season came, he asked to skip it. It was the first time we’ve skipped watching a Super Bowl season. I guess I’m not the only one losing interest in the sport. We decided to watch the Lin-Manuel Miranda Monkey movie instead.
Being on the couch with Dad made me realize I was getting closer to my goal. I can’t wait to see the results.
***
“Hell yeah, my man, you can do it!” Brad said, slapping my shoulder.
“What are you doing here?” I asked
“You said I can come in whenever I like,” he replied.
He’s been breaking into my house for no reason, just to stay on the second floor the entire time doing god knows what.
“I’ve brought some beef jerky here to celebrate,” Brad said.
The scale has been set up, we’re only waiting on Mom. They’re doing some last minute catch up; mom is using a funnel to pour some milkshake in him. I am not concerned though, sticking to Theo’s strict diet every day has not been easy. I have to eat until my stomach is fully bloated. Every morning, I watch my belly deflate a little less, every evening, it bloats even further.
“Don’t worry, Jay. We’ve got this,” Theo assured me.
“By the way, what are we doing again?” Brad asked.
Dad came out, looking absolutely massive. With Mom on his side, he stepped on the scale.
The numbers keep going up and don't seem to be stopping.
300-350-392-400-443
Holy shit, Dad gained a hundred and forty pounds this year.
With more uncertainty, I took my step on the scale.
“Woo-Hoo, Jay man, you got this!” Brad shouted quietly.
I try to look under to see the number, but my belly is too big for me to see the scale.
Theo stepped closer and read.
“Four Hundred and fifty yes!” Theo cheered.
“I won? Yes, finally!” I said and did a little jump.
The scale made a “Pop” noise.
“Oh! Sorry, Mom. I know this is really expensive.”
“Don’t worry, sweetie. We need to upgrade anyway,” Mom said, then she walked towards Theo.
“Congratulations Theo, you made me pull out every trick in my book. It’s so nice seeing you improve so much in front of my eyes, in terms, you pushed me to improve too,” Mom said, then hugged Theo.
“I can’t believe my boy is bigger than me now. Excellent work, Jay!” Dad said and hugged me, too.
Last time I was bigger than Dad I had sculpted abs, the body I dreamed of. This time, I’m almost three times the size as I was, fully covered with fat. Yet, I feel less empty inside.
“Thank you Dad,” I said, hugging him back.
After all this time, I finally have a body I like being in. The belly doesn't look so wrong on me anymore.
Chapter 4 ->
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Don’t mind me, just thinkin abt self-conscious Dad Bod! Miguel :,,(
(NSFW)
<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3
Since y’all been together, he’s gained some weight which he isn’t too happy about. It’s not really him it bothers. He couldn’t care less if his stomach was pudgy or if his love handles were coming in, he was more worried about you losing your physical attraction towards him.
Miguel couldn’t be more wrong though. Especially since his ass got fatter, yum.
You could never stop yourself from smacking it every time you walked past him. He’d get embarrassed, then he’d try to get back you back, which he always did. Then it’d lead to a silly game of tag.
One day though, he was on the couch watching tv, wearing a tank top and some basketball shorts. You had just woken up and went to grab something to eat, but you stopped at the door of your shared bedroom, beholding the sight. He didn’t see you yet, but you quietly took a moment for yourself to just… admire him.
The way his bulging biceps and pecs were just sitting there, resting across the back of the couch. His man spread that gave you the perfect view of his massive thighs and what was in between, the shorts fitting just right, borderline too tight. And then the lack of abs that used to be there… but you weren’t complaining. In fact,
You loved that.
In his peripheral, Miguel notices you at the bedroom door. “Morning, sleeping beauty.”
“Good morning, handsome.” You say, smiling at the love of your life, stuck at the doorway and admiring him.
“Ven aqui conmigo, beba.” He motions for his lap, and naturally, you follow his request.
While the two of you hold a longing gaze, you straddle him, your hands resting on his chest. You share a tender kiss, the smacks of your lips turning the both of you on. Miguel moans into your mouth as he feels your hips lazily grind against him, his manhood twitching at the sensation. Your hands begin to trail down his belly, tugging upward at the hem of his tank top, but then he stops you, “Mmmwait… let’s- let’s keep that on, okay?”
You raise your eyebrow, confused at this. “Why? What’s wrong?” You murmur, genuinely concerned.
“No, I’m fine, it’s just… look, I know I’ve put on some weight, so you don’t have to do this if you don’t feel like it-“
“Miguel O’Hara,” You look at him sternly, “I absolutely do not care if you gain weight. I love you no matter what. Besides,” your face softens into a more seductive expression, “Ever heard of relationship weight? It just means I’m takin’ good care of my mans… aren’t I taking good care of you, baby?” You coo at him, your hands snaking their way to the hem of his top again.
He slowly nods, his self doubt and insecurities melting away at your words. “Now let me take this off, please? I wanna see all of my man.” He lets you pull off the tank top, revealing the mouth- watering dad bod he’s acquired since dating you.
Your eyes drink him up, your hands following pursuit. Miguel’s huge, calloused hands tighten on your hips, squeezing the flesh there, trying to gauge your reaction.
“God, just looking at you does things to me.” You mewl against his ear, peppering kisses along his thick neck. Your hips start again, the bulge just underneath your heat growing larger.
“Mmfuck, you mean it, baby?” he moans, voice strained, his face in complete euphoria.
“Every word.” You mutter, smothering his face in kisses as your hips go deeper and harder against his hardened cock.
“And I don’t wanna hear anymore of this nonsense, you hear me?” You continue speaking in between kisses, showering him with them on his cheeks, forehead, jaw, temple, anywhere, “you’re the most cutest,” smack, “most handsome,” smack, “most sexy,” smack, “most fine lookin’ man I’ve ever laid eyes on.” You finally plant a desperate, much more needy kiss on his lips, your tongues dancing with each other.
“Mmm, yes ma’am.”
Long story short, you get him all riled up enough that he pushes you down into the couch and completely wrecks you while your wear a t shirt of his <3 Isn’t he just so dreamy??? <3333333
Want more DadBod!Miguel ? Here’s my master list, bae!!
#miguel o'hara#miguel o’hara fanfiction#miguel o’hara x reader#miguel o’hara fluff#dbf!miguel#dad bod!Miguel#miguel ohara#miguel O’Hara Drabble#miguel o’hara fan fiction#miguel o’hara one shot#miguel o’hara headcanon#miguel o’hara x y/n#miguel o’hara x you#miguel o’hara smut#spider man 2099 x reader#spider man 2099#miguel o’hara fanart#miguel o’hara#miguel o’hara fic#miguel o’hara imagine#miguel o’hara across the spider verse#miguel x reader#miguel spiderman#atsv miguel#miguel smut#miguel x you#miguel x y/n#across the spiderverse#miguel 2099#miguel fanfic
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( drabble ) imperfect for you
pairing : boyfriend!quinn x fem!reader wc. 800+
genre : fluff and angst warnings : quinn feeling insecure
summary : quinn comes back home after a tough loss
quinn hughes was quiet when he stepped through the door of your shared apartment. the soft click of the door shutting seemed unnaturally loud in the stillness of the room. you sat curled up on the couch, wearing one of his oversized hoodies, waiting for him. you hadn’t heard from him since the game ended, but the look on his face when he walked in told you everything you needed to know:
the canucks had lost.
his usually bright eyes were dull, his shoulders slumped under the weight of disappointment. he dropped his hockey bag by the door, the sound of it hitting the floor making you wince. he didn’t even bother to take off his shoes before trudging toward the kitchen.
you bit your lip, unsure of how to approach him. quinn wasn’t the type to lash out after a loss, but you knew he internalized every mistake, every missed opportunity. he’d probably already gone through the game in his head a dozen times, dissecting every shift. it broke your heart to see him like this, carrying the weight of the world on his shoulders.
“hey,” you called softly, rising from the couch and padding toward him. he was leaning against the counter, his hands gripping the edge like it was the only thing keeping him upright.
“hey,” he replied, his voice hoarse, barely above a whisper.
you stood there for a moment, unsure of what to say. the silence stretched between you like a chasm, and you hated it. quinn deserved to feel whatever he was feeling, but you couldn’t just stand by and watch him drown in it.
“i made your favorite,” you said tentatively, motioning toward the table where a plate of pasta sat waiting. “figured you might need some comfort food.”
he glanced at the plate, his lips twitching into the barest hint of a smile. “thanks,” he murmured, but he didn’t move.
you stepped closer, hesitating for a moment before wrapping your arms around his waist. his body tensed at first, but then he relaxed into your embrace, his head dropping to rest on your shoulder.
“i’m sorry, quinn,” you whispered, your fingers tracing soothing circles on his back. “i know how much you wanted to win.”
“it’s not just that,” he admitted, his voice muffled against your shoulder. “i feel like i let everyone down. the team, the fans… you.”
you pulled back just enough to cup his face in your hands, forcing him to look at you. “quinn, stop. you didn’t let me down. you could never let me down.”
his eyes searched yours, vulnerable and unsure, like he was trying to believe you but didn’t quite know how.
“you’re so hard on yourself,” you continued, your thumbs brushing against his cheekbones. “but you’re not alone in this. it’s okay to be upset, but don’t let it consume you. you’re still the same guy i love, whether you win or lose.”
his breath hitched at your words, and he pulled you back into his arms, holding you tighter this time. “i don’t deserve you,” he muttered.
“stop that,” you scolded gently, though your heart ached at the raw emotion in his voice. “i’m here because i love you, quinn. wins, losses, and everything in between.”
for a while, the two of you just stood there, holding onto each other like you were the only solid thing in a world that felt like it was spinning out of control. eventually, you coaxed him to sit down at the table, and he reluctantly started eating the pasta you’d made. you sat across from him, keeping the conversation light, telling him about your day, anything to distract him from the heaviness in his chest.
by the time he’d finished eating, some of the tension had eased from his shoulders. he leaned back in his chair, watching you with an expression that was softer now, less burdened.
“you’re amazing, you know that?” he said, his voice tinged with awe.
“i try,” you teased, grinning at him. “but seriously, quinn, you don’t have to carry everything on your own. i’m here for you, always.”
he reached across the table, taking your hand in his. his fingers were calloused and warm, and the way he held onto you felt like an unspoken promise.
“i don’t know what i’d do without you,” he said quietly.
“you’ll never have to find out,” you replied, squeezing his hand.
later, as you curled up together on the couch, his head resting in your lap, you ran your fingers through his hair, soothing him like you always did when he was stressed. the room was quiet except for the faint hum of the tv in the background, and for the first time that night, quinn looked at peace.
“i love you,” he murmured, his eyes fluttering shut.
“i love you too,” you replied, leaning down to press a gentle kiss to his forehead.
and in that moment, with quinn safe in your arms, the weight of the loss didn’t seem quite so heavy anymore.
© amourquinn
#[ 📁 ] drabble#quinn hughes#quinn hughes x reader#quinn hughes fanfiction#quinn hughes fluff#quinn hughes fic#nhl hockey#vancouver canucks#quinn hughes angst
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Fame Greedy
Jeremy Sumpter was stood on the set of a new advert he had been signed up to by his agent. After his successful childhood in films, Jeremy struggled to break free of his past and become a serious actor now he was older. He could never land movies despite his incredible body and devotion to the roles. He was becoming frustrated with his situation. After he finished filming the advert for the day he stomped back to his hotel room and slammed the door in frustration. What more do people want. Jeremy went for a shower to cool off and when he walked out of the bathroom with a white towel around his waist he saw his agent sat on his bed. “Jesus Adam warn me next time I could’ve been naked” Jeremy said jumping slightly as he realised just how naked he was. “Oh I don’t mind Jeremy just ignore me whilst you get ready. There’s some things I wanna run past you” Adam, his agent said to him. Jeremy started to get changed. As said before he has a pretty perfect body so he wasn’t embarrassed when he dropped his towel in front of his agent to pulled on some white briefs. “So I know you are frustrated by doing adverts all the time and I think I’ve figured a way to change your direction” Adam said scrolling through his phone trying to find something. “Oh please anything is better than doing these pissing adverts” Jeremy chimed in now pulling on some jeans. “Well you see there’s been a role open up and they want you specifically.” Adam put his phone down and looked at Jeremy as he pulled on a tight shirt that showed off his toned body. “Omg no way! That’s amazing I’m so down!” Jeremy said cracking a smile. “Well there’s a catch you see. They want you but they want you to erm bulk up a bit…”
“what do you mean? How much?” Jeremy said becoming a little skeptical. “Well they didn’t give a maximum number but they said at least 60 lbs.”
“60 lbs!!!! If I gained that I’d be fat?!? Are you sure?” Jeremy said shocked by this number. “Well Jeremy they kind of want that. You see your playing a gamer for this movie and they want a big guy so they asked for you to do this…”
“Jesus christ. Well I guess I can always lose it after the film. Fine I’ll do it. Go get me some food then” Jeremy said standing up pacing around his hotel room. Was he really about to do this? He worked hard for his perfect body just to get roles and now they want him fat? I guess 60 lbs isn’t life changing. I could definitely lose that he said to him self.
Every day now Jeremy would wake up and start eating and wouldn’t stop until he passed out from a food coma. He loved eating cakes and pies and fast food. He thought there could be worse things to do. Just being told to sit on his arse and stuff his face with crap wasn’t so bad. Some days he even enjoyed lying around in his tight briefs stuffing his gut.
He started to feel his body soften as time went on. His abs melted into a soft belly that was bulging outwards. As he sat rolls formed on his body. He looked down and poked them. His finger sinking deeper into his gut was kind of intriguing. He’d never been this soft it was interesting finally letting go. It was also so easy that he started to enjoy it. He made games for him self to try and eat as much as possible. He would gain these 60 lbs in no time.
6 months had passed and the 60 lbs of fat he was asked to gain was sitting softly on his body. His body looked like it had melted away into lard. His once fit body was now replaced with a body of someone who’s lazy and unable to stop eating. Jeremy had to admit, yes he was concerned to start with but he really enjoyed the process. He loved eating and over eating. He loved sitting and doing nothing all day. And truthfully he enjoyed the extra weight on his body.
He was asked for a screen test so the ex jock actor came into the studio and got ready for the screen test. He was asked to sit in just white briefs and to sit in the set built for the movie. The camera and sound crew were all set up and ready. The director calls action and Jeremy started acting the first scene. The scene was asking Jeremy to lay on the sofa with a bag of crisps on his belly and eating the whole bag whilst a video game plays in the background. He admitted that he thought there’d be some lines to say but he happily just laid back and stuffed his belly. The director yelled cut and asked for Jeremy to come to his office. “Everything alright?” Jeremy asked the director as he entered the office still in his costume. “Jeremy my boy look at you. You look amazing. Thank you for your devotion to the project” the director said placing his hands on the sides of Jeremy’s belly. Jeremy couldn’t help but feel proud of his gain. “You see though. When envisioning the character we thought he would be well fatter. He’s a really lazy greedy character and you just look a bit chubby. We want some really mass on you.” Jeremy was a little taken a back. He felt like a lard arse already but maybe this wasn’t enough. “Alright then. I’ll erm gain some more for you then.”
“Amazing thank you Jeremy. You are gonna be one big star one day!” Jeremy walked back to his hotel room his belly rumbling. He plopped him self down on his bed. He caught a glimpse of him self in the mirror opposite his bed. He pulled off his shirt and looked at his bulging belly, the rolls that replaced his abs. He had never thought he’d get this fat but now he was gonna have to get fatter. He called for room service and huge trolly of food came to his room. He’s gonna enjoy these next few months of stuffing.
Every month Adam came round to check on Jeremy and make sure he was making progress. He would make Jeremy strip down and show his fat body. He took measurements of every part of his expanding body.
“Wow you really are packing on the pounds huh big guy?!” Adam said patting Jeremy’s belly. “I just need this role Adam. I’ve gotta show I’m serious about this. Plus it’s not hard being a lazy slob all the time anyway” Jeremy walked over to the trolly of food and stuffing in a burger. “Well you sure are a lazy slob.” Jeremy looked around at Adam as he said this. “See you next month chubs!” Adam walked out of his hotel room. That’s when Jeremy felt the hot pulse of horniness in his tight underwear. Did he enjoy Adam fat shaming him? Something about being called a lazy slob and chubs made his dick stand to attention. Maybe this fat body wasn’t bad at all. In some ways it’s actually better maybe…
A year had passed Jeremy never stop eating. He never did exercise. And never wanted to lose the weight. He awoke one morning and pulled on a tight white vest and his usual white briefs. He looked at him self. His round fat gut was huge now and hung out of his white vest. His underwear barely fit his fat figure now. He pulled up a photo of him self from last year and was so pleased to see how his body had changed. What a lard arse he had turned into. He remembers being told about this role and vowing to lose the weight after he finished but. Kw he was this huge, he never wanted to go back to his fit old self. If anything he wanted to be bigger. That evening filming started for the film. Every scene had Jeremy stuffing and eating him self silly. For months the director had him stuffed with food on camera. He had very little lines and spent the whole time being a hog on set. All this pigging out lead to him to gain even more weight and by the end of filming, the old fit boy had transformed into a huge round lard filled fatty.
Jeremy!! So good to see you big guy!” Adam came in on the last day of filming. He was met with the sight of a morbidly obese Jeremy. “You look huge!” Adam said as he hugged the greedy actor and placed hands on his belly. “Adam what actually is this film? All I’ve done is eat and be a fat pig for months. Why is that?” Jeremy said with a grin looking at Adam who had his hands on Jeremy’s fat gut. “Oh you see I was gonna say but I just kept forgetting. You see there’s a load of people who really enjoy seeing fit men get fat so me and the director thought you’d be perfect. We’ve been filming you for well over a year as you’ve grown into the man you are today. It’s like a documentary all about how you’ve turned into such a huge hog. And it’s gonna be a smash hit!”
Jeremy looked at Adam and couldn't help but smile. “You better sign me up for the sequel to this film then Adam”
“Don’t worry. The presale for this movie is already insane so you’ll be back. You’ll be along side Tom Holland as well next time!” “Oh I can’t wait to see how that goes…”
Based on the recent images I’ve posted on Jeremy Sumpter I decided to write a story with some images along side them. Hope you guys enjoy this story of the growing actor. Hopefully his fame will out weight him one day!
#men getting fatter#fatty#full belly#fat#fit to fat#male weight gain#fatboy#cute belly#fat men#fat belly#fat guy#fat piggy#juicy fat ass#big fatty#gut#fat gut#bloated gut#beer gut#ball gut#fat boy#bulking#chub#exjock#gaygainer#gained weight#gaining weight on purpose#college gainer#gay gainer#men gaining waight#weight gain
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(part 4) wrong choice, wrong move-a.donaldson
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a/n: fem reader but as per usual, imagine what you like :)
summary: when you find out about his betrayal and how your relationship truly ends. (dw there are more parts after this :))
pairing: art donaldson x reader
warnings: angst, feelings of disappointment, hurt, allusions to an eating disorder, depression, fainting, cheating, etc. +
PART 4 of 12
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Art was a shell of his former self. His eyes were constantly blood-shot and sunken, he was losing weight, his mindset was fucked, the works. Yet, you seemed perfectly fine. Your tennis had never been better, your grades were excellent, and you were focusing on yourself. Well, you were trying to, it was pretty difficult when Art Donaldson was constantly over your shoulder, wondering when he could apologise and make things right. You two had promised that you’d go no-contact for a few weeks, giving time to allow the fresh cuts to heal over and then you’d be there for each other after. That ‘no-contact’ lasted a day. Then Art was at your door sobbing his eyes out, and you had to let him in.
“I`’m so sorry to show up like this,” he sighed, tears rolling down his cheeks as he rested his head on your chest, his arms holding you close to him as you played with his hair.
“It’s alright Art,” you promised him. You missed him just as much as he missed you but you were hurt. You wanted a change in behaviour, not just some pretty tears and kind words. “Seriously, we promised we’d be there for each other.”
Art let out a choked sob into your chest and you held him tighter. “It's ok, I’m always going to be here for you.”
“I’m so sorry,” he cried into your chest. “I love you so much.”
“I love you too,” you whispered, trying to calm him down. “Art you can’t keep doing this to yourself, you have to move on,” you sighed. “I’m not that special.”
His eyes met yours in a disapproving glare as he stood up, pacing your dorm. “You’re so special. You’re so incredibly interesting and smart and driven and I fucking love you! I fucking love you so much that I show up at your dorm room every fucking day looking like a fucking loser and making you comfort me because I fucked up! You’re off doing your own thing, being amazing and I barely do anything anymore! I feel like I can’t breathe when you’re not around, like I can’t think when you’re not there. I need you Y/n. So yes, you’re pretty fucking special to me!”
The room was silent.
“Art, just calm down love,” you sighed, trying to coax him to calm down.
“I’m not calming down. I want you, I want you more than anything-”
“Art that’s not fair,” you snapped. You were angry now. It’s exhausting watching someone be this blind to their own faults. “Art, we broke up because you constantly choose Tashi over me. That’s on you! You need to move on!”
“Have you?!” He shouted back.
“I can’t when you’re clinging to me like a fucking baby!” You shouted. “Go to your friends, not your ex-girlfriend Art! We broke up and maybe yeah, it was your fucking fault but I’ve been really nice trying to not hurt you more because I love you!-”
“Then why are we broken up!?” His voice cracked.
“Because I’m sick of being your second choice!” You screamed.
Art was quiet. He grabbed his jacket from the bed and left your dorm, leaving you to fall apart on your own.
Since Art had felt, your world had grown quieter and quieter, you became more distant to those around you, you were unhappy, you ate less, you trained more, probably too much.
But what else were you supposed to do?
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You showed up to the Challenger ready to win, despite the clear exhaustion you showed with your sunken and dark eyes, horrible posture, and constant yawning.
Art was shocked. He hadn’t seen you in weeks. You were significantly slimmer, you looked awful to be honest, and he knew it was his fault.
You served first, Tashi against you. The serve was good, not your best, but you two were playing real tennis.
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The ball hit the court and the game was over, you’d won, once again. Art and Patrick cheered discreetly from the stands as Tashi smashed her racket in anger. You didn’t even celebrate, just running to the bathroom and into a stall, sitting on the closed seat and passing out.
You were severely damaging yourself. Your entire team knew you were not safe to be playing, but they knew you were at your prime to go pro, so they ignored it. Everyday was like an uphill battle, one that you were losing.
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“Art!” Tashi shouted as Art rambled about how ill you looked. “I don���t fucking care about her form, or how she looked! If she’s ill, how come she beat me?!”
Art stayed silent.
“I cannot believe I fucked you at that party,” Tashi sighed, her head in her hands. You gasped and hid behind the door, stopping your hitting partner from walking into the warm-up court.
Art and Tashi had fucked the night of the party. The party that you and Art were late to because he fucked you before it.
He’d cheated on you.
What?
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You walked into the court, head high in spite of the dizzy feeling in your head.
“Good game, sorry I had to run off earlier, I felt sick,”you explained to Tashi, holding your hand out for her to shake.
"Good game," she grumbled. You caught a glimpse of the horror on Art's face. You'd heard. He was never getting you back, not now, not ever.
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art donaldson masterlist :)
navigation for my blog :) (criminal minds, obx, the bear, marvel, top gun, the hunger games, challengers :)
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#art challengers#art donaldson x reader#art donaldson#challengers#zendaya#mike faist#mike faist x reader#josh oconnor#patrick zweig
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This may not be my bussines but I'd like to know how did you decided to become a hot looking gympig from a hot looking gymrat?
Also congratulations on your new apartment
I’ve always been into getting fat, but I’ve always been skinny. It was not long after getting into the gym myself and discovering how much I liked working out that I started to think about pursuing being fat.
I think the gym, as backwards it might sound, is what gave me the confidence to get big. I will not lie when I first gained 30 lbs I thought I was so fat and lost it. I cut back down to having abs, weighing only 130 ish lbs.
After that, it was 2020 and Covid/lockdown pulled me away from the opportunities to work out or be active. All I had was work and plenty of time of self reflecting. I decided to get fat again, and just fat, so I was gained like 50 lbs, eating super unhealthy fast food. I became pre-diabetic and didn’t feel good, fortunately, this was after the gyms had reopened and I could start working out again.
My doctor didn’t encourage me to lose any weight, he only encouraged I keep working out in the gym and checking up with him every 6 months.
Since then, I decided to not only just be obese, but I wanted to be more healthy about it. I try to not over do it in carbs and sugar, I try to get more calories by eating tons of healthier food, drink more water, and work out hard in the gym. I also learned how to train myself to eat tons and tons of food, so I can eat loads of calories form loads of healthy food.
& I now I’ve grown bigger than ever, 80+ lbs fatter and healthier. This direction for me, also has made me so much more confident and happy with myself. I feel more like me the bigger I get and it is the best feeling ever.
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⸻ 𝐖𝐀𝐃𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐃𝐂𝐀𝐍𝐎𝐍𝐒
cw :: nsfw content (MDNI)
a/n :: i love this man so much. i don't think yall understand this big ass man? i love him so much and i want him.
{✰} sfw ::
{✰} wade is a mercenary but he keeps his work life away from you so you don't get hurt because he doesn't want to lose you.
{✰} wade is always joking around with you, his one goal is to make you laugh every day, even when he's not with you. he always sends you messages and voice memos which make you laugh.
{✰} wade loves cooking and he would get all dramatic and make you a full-course meal as if he's on chopped or something. he wants you to pretend to be gordon ramsay
{✰} wade loves spending money on you, he doesn't use the money for anything besides food and rent for his apartment, so he loves spending it on you. whatever you want, he gets it for you. any time you go out to dinner wade will threaten to drop your wallet off a cliff because "why're you trying to pay? don't do that again or i will throw your wallet off a cliff and into some water."
{✰} wade would get matching nails with you, whatever set you get, he's ready to get a matching set.
{✰} wade doesn't like to have his mask off in public because of his scars and at first, he didn't even show you his face half the time but now that you guys have been together for so long, he takes it off around you because he knows it doesn't phase you.
{✰} wade loves physical touch so naturally, he would be all over you. wade likes to think of himself as a murderous teddy bear that only really cares about you.
{✰} wade doesn't like arguing with you unless it's playfully and not about anything serious but if it's a serious argument then he will start to get anxious and unconsciously start to self-sabotage.
{✰} wade gets emotional over chick flicks and when you ask if he's crying he'll say, "of course not...it's just a little dusty in here."
{✰} wade likes bringing you souvenirs from the countries he's visited for work and he brings you random trinkets that you will never use but he lights up when he brings them to you so you put them on display around your shared apartment.
{✰} nsfw ::
{✰} wade loves kissing, he likes the feel of your lips on his. he likes to suck on your bottom lip making you whine into his mouth.
{✰} wade is possessive and jealous, he will mark your neck just so everyone could see that you're taken and no one else could have your attention. he wouldn't blame you for being ogled but he would take it out on you, fucking into you so roughly and so deeply while you cry into the sheets, "fuck, you're mine. this pussy is mine. say it, say it's mine." you couldn't do anything but moan loudly and say exactly that, "fuck, daddy! it's yours, i'm yours!
{✰} wade is into thigh riding. he will watch you chase your release on his thigh before fucking the way you want him to, he ultimately wants to see you beg him to fuck you.
{✰} wade is 100% into praise and degradation, he wants to make you're okay with it before he says something that triggers you in bed.
{✰} on occasion, wade likes to be restrained. he likes when you have some type of power over him, makes him cum harder and he likes when you tease him. he keeps handcuffs by the bed just for this specific moment, you're in his lap and taking your time riding him - slowly grinding your hips just to make him beg you, "please, baby.. let me fuck you, please."
{✰} wade is into choking, he loves to see his hand wrapped around your throat while he has you in a mating press, pushing all his weight onto you and fucking you deep enough to make you cum over and over.
{✰} sometimes when wade is feeling very needy, he just needs you. times like this, he'll take his time with you, fingering for a long time to make sure you can take him, eating your pussy like he's starving before he fucks you nice and slow saying how much he loves you. "i love you so much, baby. so good for me, taking all of me so well."
{✰} speaking of... wade is a munch. he will happily lap at your slick, sit you on his face, and grip your thighs while you ride his face, using him for your own pleasure. he would also take the opportunity to overstimulate you, your thighs wrapped around his head trying to push him away having already cum twice but he wants more from you.
© 𝐥𝐮𝐱𝐞𝐬𝐢𝐫𝐞𝐧 | all rights reserved to me. please do not steal, copy, or repost to other websites.
#𝙇𝙐𝙓𝙐𝙍𝙔 𝙋𝙊𝙎𝙏𝙎…#𝙨𝙞𝙧𝙚𝙣 𝙞𝙨 𝙬𝙧𝙞𝙩𝙞𝙣𝙜…#wade wilson#wade wilson smut#wade wilson x reader#deadpool#deadpool smut#deadpool drabble#deadpool headcanons#wade wilson headcanons
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