#even with the absolute hellscape that is the united state and texas right now

[thesaltyace]

just personal stuff about impending breast reduction surgery below the cut

I'm so excited for what clothes I want to get after I'm healed up. I was talking to spouse today about how I would finally feel comfortable MAYBE trying a crop top. Because crop top with large chest equals mega dysphoria... but crop top with small chest might be cool? One thing I know for sure is I want to get men's button down shirts to wear unbuttoned over a tshirt (preferably with gay stuff on the tshirt) with jeans and the most obnoxiously colored sneakers I can find. I might want to try wearing dress/skirt type stuff again, without the hyper feminine focus I had last time I tried to add those to my wardrobe.

I think I'd also be super interested in trying to figure out how to wear/style a jumpsuit. I think I'd also be interested in wearing tank tops in the summer, which blows my fucking mind because I haven't been comfortable wearing tank tops since middle school. But with a small chest, I'd be totally cool rocking a tank top even - and perhaps especially - with my hairy pits out for the world to see. Hilariously enough, all the gains I'd made with being comfortable baring my hairy legs were lost over covid since I wasn't leaving the house ever. Booo. So I guess I'll be looking in to making my own linen pants that won't roast me in the summer months if I also want to cover my legs.

I'm just.... I had a pretty distinct style in middle and high school. It was boring, but distinct. It would have been less boring if my mom wasn't hyper controlling about me wearing the right clothes to fit in (LMFAO like there was ever a chance I could fit in XD). Anyway I feel like this personal renaissance is on the horizon, this post-surgery future means I can feel at home in my own skin. I can feel so at home in my own skin, in fact, that I will be delighted to adorn said skin with whatever clothes make me feel good because I'll feel like I can more genuinely express my authentic self.

I am very jazzed about this. I know that I won't realistically be getting new clothes in the immediate future - probably not until this winter at the earliest - since I will need not only time to heal but also time to adjust and consider what I actually feel comfortable with beyond abstract imaginations. And I'll probably start with just a couple things and wear those literally all the time. And only add another item every few months or longer. But the possibilities are flying around my brain and it makes me very excited for post-surgery results.