#even tho it's not wednesday yet lmao

[omgahgase]

going off the headcanon list i posted before, i wrote a lil something about arthur kissing charles' scar instead during their first kiss

“Charles,” Arthur says, eyes raking across Charles like he’s scared he’ll disappear if Arthur gets too close. Loves a little too hard because Arthur is a lot of things, but deserving of someone as good as Charles ain’t one of them. He’s terrified, and rightfully so.

But it still ain’t feel wrong.

None of it does. Not the way Arthur fits himself so perfectly into Charles’ space, noses brushing against each other, eyelids sliding close so they can get a feel for this newfound intimacy, lips a phantom of a feeling atop their heated skin, foreheads pressed and hands clutched in clothing. It doesn’t feel wrong for Arthur to catch a glimpse of Charles’ scar as he rubs their cheeks together, scratches his scruff againsts Charles’ as if he’s trying to strike a match, intense and burning the more he does it.

It doesn’t feel wrong as Arthur traces his lips over the streaking pattern of flesh, long time healed but never treated with such desire. Arthur skates his mouth down to the underside of Charles’ jaw, right where it begins, and places a searing kiss to the start of it, makes Charles tilt his head up in a gasp.

The hand screwed tight on Arthur’s back nearly rips a hole in his shirt. “Arthur—please.”

Arthur hums, takes his time in mapping out Charles scar. He uses his lips and kisses up the line until he reaches the end, licks at the uneven ridges of haphazardly mended flesh, tasting the sweat of the day and the chill of the nightair that lays over Charles like a sheet, makes him shiver in Arthur’s arms.

to be finished later this week, please stay tuned!

[bougiebutchbitch]

headcanon few will enjoy, but you (and the noblest of your followers) are among the enlightened:

poolverine starting out as hate sex (canon), as in they're fighting but wade is so so submissive and breedable about it and it makes logan horngry (horny-angry) (canon).

pero like. logan does something totally gruesome to wade and wade does not just quip 'harder daddy', does not just submit to it, does not even just moan like a whore, he fully comes in his pants about it lmfao.

and logan is like are you FUCKING KIDDING ME. and becomes even more horngry and starts doing gruesomer and gruesomer things to wade with the primary motivation to find his limit so he can finally actually fucking hurt him for real god damn it. and he keeps not finding it, and wade's kind of giving as good as he gets sure, but he's on some turn based shit, always eagerly pausing after he hits/stabs/bites back to let logan do whatever he's gonna do next, which is infuriating enough by itself WITHOUT the, yes, begging for more, and calling logan daddy AND kitten AND also calling himself both of those in the third person fucking CHRIST he's so annoying, and the moaning like a whore, and the slutty positions, and the bimbo giggling, and, every now and then, the fucking coming in his fucking pants again the absolute FREAK. until logan gets exhausted or runs out of ideas and has to take a breather (at which point of course wade says some type of "we should do this again some time" shit).

but THEN! slowly it turns less into hate why-don't-you-have-a-limit-i-can-cross sex and more into awed do-you-really-not-have-a-limit-i-can-cross sex. where logan will try something he's like ok SURELY no one could possibly get off on THIS, and then watches in incredulous wonder when wade proves him wrong before escalating, rinse and repeat.

which is how they end up with logan as the ms paint meme Creature in the pussy. like he's eating him out normal. ok good but boring, they're both bored by that, the only way that's gonna really Do It for them is if logan makes wade come like 87 times in 20 minutes and it hurts so bad and wade is so helpless and. you get it. so anyway, then logan puts his claws through wade's thighs to spread them how he wants them instead of just grabbing them, and he can feel that he definitely got some femur on the right, but wade squirting on his face is not about to escape his notice either lmao.

so then he's like okay i'll bite. and bites. and he bites like a real wolverine of course, sinking his teeth in and locking his jaw with 1k+ lbs of force. and he growls and shakes his prey a LITTLE bit just on instinct, but not too much yet because it still hasn't totally sunk in that he could behead wade with a thousand little cuts and wade would be into it. but yeah so obviously wade squeals and starts dirty talk begging for logan to literally eat him alive.

and on one hand. on the homo sapiens hand specifically. logan is like jfc this guy. but on the homo superior and/or canis lupus hand he's like KILL EAT FUCK!!! [creature.jpg]

and uh. so. well. he. he eats wade's pussy. i mean he doesn't like, chew and swallow his flesh, but only because he tears it up so much it's not really a solid food situation anymore. pussy puree. got their bedroom looking like bruce's eating dome after raspberry wednesday.

but yeah so wade's into it lmao. like really really really into it. obviously screaming from pain yes, but even more than that screaming in bliss, and maybe a little bit ecstatic shock that logan a) took his psycho dirty talk seriously and gave him exactly what he asked for even tho anyone else would assume it's just talk or tell him no wade you don't understand that's impossible, and b) lost control of himself because of wade which is truly just the sexiest possible thing to happen.

and in fact wade is so into it he wants to keep getting his cunt played with about it. but um. he doesn't. he doesn't have one. logan ate it out. like, literally. it's gone. so after he's done reaching elysium and seeing nirvana and getting his brain so flooded with endorphins and oxytocin that he probably shorts something out in there, after that he gets kinda bummed out because now he has to wait for his stupid pussy to grow back in order for logan to hurt it again :(

but at this point, it'd be a feat of its own for logan to not get this shit into his hardest-metal-on-earth head. not to mention of course when you are a sadist and your fucked up little freak of a masochist with a healing factor likes it that much when you hurt him that bad, you want nothing more than to hurt him again. the precious sweet little injured gazelle all alone on the prairie deserves to be gored and gutted for being such a good slut <3

so. logan pauses, a deliberate stretch of stillness where he doesn't do anything to wade but he doesn't move away either, so that wade will look down at him and see the hunting instinct still hot and heavy in his eyes, the slow ominous smirk he gives with equal parts slick and blood on his mouth.

and then he starts tongue fucking the wound. obviously.

(and now i'm imagining logan eating wade out all through the healing process as piece by piece of his pussy grows back...... hm.)

uh anyway. i think it's morning where you are. good morning lol.

GOOD GRIEF YOU CAN'T DO THIS TO ME BEFORE I HAVE TO DO AN EXAM ABOUT STATISTICS

I am gonna be CONSUMED by this for the next 500 years. Consumed. Like Logan consumed that cunt in raw, bloody bites.

There were so many moments when reading this where i had to just. Pause. Because holy shit. First, you are speaking directly to my soul. THIS IS IT. The nasty shit we ALL deserve. Second, HELP. Third, 'got their bedroom looking like bruce's eating dome after raspberry wednesday' has me r o l l i n g.

This is the most important essay since humanity's inception. It is the pinnacle of human art. It should be commemorated in museums worldwide.

He ate that pussy. He ate it.

And Wade whimpered for more.

[trickstarbrave]

WIP Wednesday

i got tagged by @saltymaplesyrup (why will tumblr not let me tag wtf) for wip wednesday. i dont have any new writing bc uhhhhhhhhh reasons (yknow my. dog) but i do have some art ive been working on

veeeeeeeery rough atm. like a lot of my art at first HGHGBRHGEBGH

this is actually nerevar! i have a hc he's part nord, with a chimer mom and nord dad. in my fic it's established nerevar's dad went back to skyrim to settle an inheritance dispute and uh. died. and after his mom found out nerevar was already like, 10. so she just up and left him in the care of his maternal uncle.

but i was thinking what if his dad hadn't died and he was raised in skyrim? he would be in the rift, bordering on the velothi mountains, only hearing about skyrim and seeing the stray cliff racer. after his dad dies for real this time his mother takes him to resdayn/morrowind

idk i just kinda like the idea of fur wearing, axe wielding, braids in his hair nerevar. in a lot of ways he'd be different and in others he'd be the same. definitely still hot tho (imagine voryn getting a look at him and immediately dropping everything in his hands to stare LMAO)

this also works for moon and star for uhhhhh reasons. i can explain how this would end up happening if you ask ha ha i dont want this post to be even longer explaining a lil sketch

tagging: @your-talos-is-problematic, @boethiahspillowbook, @mulberrycafe (do u like tagging games. i dunno. if not u can ignore this bghgbreh) uhhhhhhhhhh idk who else wants to that hasn't been tagged yet........ anyone reading this can def do it i wanna see ur stuff :>

[stevethehairington]

six sentence saturday! (even tho it's uhhh wednesday. fhsjdkd shhh.) ty @heybluechild for the tag! 💕 it's a little more than six sentences so we'll call this way more than six sentences wednesday 😂

Fitzjames smiles at him, all rosy cheeks and dazzling white teeth and endless dimples — a far too sunny disposition, if you ask Francis.

No one asks Francis, though, so he is left to grumble to himself about it as Fitzjames turns to leave him, greatcoat billowing out behind him in a fitting display of overdramatic showmanship.

Handsomest man in the navy? More like most insufferable man in the navy.

And Francis will be stuck with him for the next three years. Perhaps it is a blessing in disguise that he was not offered full command of the expedition. Fitzjames as his Second? Good christ. At least now Francis won’t have to share a ship with the man.

Small mercies.

this is uhhhh not from anything stranger things. clearly lmao. it is actually not from anything period. it's literally just a random lil handful of words that came to me a couple weeks ago that i wrote down that are currently homeless in the sense that i do not actually have a fic that they belong to yet 🤷‍♀️ we'll see what happens!

tagging: @withacapitalp @thefreakandthehair @henderdads @stevesbipanic @puppy-steve @stevebabey @steddieasitgoes and anyone else that wants to share!

[another-0ddity]

To afford my piercings, alcohol and nicotine, I got myself in a lot of debt with a course I never even got round to doing lol. My mum is taking care of it now. Sent them an email bout how I’m mentally unstable with borderline personality disorder and that I had an episode. And I felt bad about blaming it on my bpd when I did it to myself. Even though it really was my bpd. I signed up for the course during a good time, when I was hyper fixated on horses (it was a horse care course to work with horses) tho I still love horses as my favourite land animal, that hyperfixation lasted 3/4 days, I never even started the course. Then I went into self destruction. And I didn’t care to email them bout how I wanted to stop the course. And then by not paying for the course, it’s cause I’d spend all my money by Wednesday. I’d be paid on Monday night (I’m on a benefit, AKA welfare.) With getting the piercings it’s cause I’m OBSESSED with the guy who does them. Like, obsessed (bpd). And then with kinda becoming an alcoholic (bpd). And then nicotine is just nicotine and smokes are expensive asfk here in New Zealand lol. And so yeah.

I’m in a fuckton of debt and idk what’s gonna happen yet. My mum is dealing with it😅.

She said something about “If you make him pay it you’re taking advantage of a mentally unstable person.” Lmao. Even tho it is my bpd. I feel guilty not taking the blame or facing the music or facing the consequences. All my life, everything…. Everything was always my fault. Now I have a mental illness I can blame pretty much everything on. And I feel bad.

[sam-loves-seb]

weekly tag wednesday: birthday edition

thanks for the tags: @gallapiech @spookygingerr @mybrainismelted @deedala <3

and happy birthday @energievie !! 💜

When is yours? october 5

Where were you born? boston, mass

How do you feel about your legal name? Are you using it online and/or IRL? tbh i love my legal name, i think it's really pretty!! tho i almost never go by it (online or irl), everyone calls me sam cuz i think that fits my personality more but whatever. samantha [redacted middle name] [redacted last name] comes out occasionally

How about your sign? Do you feel it "fits"? i'm a libra sun with a scorpio moon and i think that just about explains everything about me

What's your earliest memory related to your birthday? a birthday party i had when i was maybe 6 or 7 at a bowling alley, and the cake was harry potter themed (specifically quidditch themed because i would rent the hp quidditch ps2 game from blockbuster every single week for a year straight) and i was obsessed

What's one of the best gifts you've ever received? my guitar (15th birthday), my macbook pro (18th birthday), and my steve harrington eras tour t-shirt (26th birthday)

How about one of the best you've given yourself? i just bought a car literally not even a week ago and i'm counting it as an early birthday present so probably that lmao. or maybe my airpods.

What's your favourite cake flavour? chocolate cake with vanilla frosting

How about your favourite flowers? daisies

Have your ever thrown a birthday party? If yes, tell us about your favourite one. does it have to be for myself? cuz last year i helped my best friend throw a surprise party for her boyfriend and it was hot ones themed and it was pretty dope.

What's the ultimate birthday song? the one in the public domain

And last but not least, pick a celebrity with whom you share your birthday. travis kelce !

tagging anyone who hasn't played this week yet <3

[daffodilsonaprettystring]

Ten lines, ten people

Rules: share the first lines of ten of your most recent fanfics and tag ten people. if you have written less than ten, don't be shy and share anyway.

Nobody tagged me I just saw one of those people who said “anybody who sees this ur tagged” and I love doing these things so fuck it I’m doing it❤️ most of these are unpublished tho lmao

1. Without You: For the first time in in his life, Sirius Black was not excited by change. If this were a normal day, and he were a normal boy, he’d be thrilled at the idea of embarking on such a journey. A ship bound for America, four days spent on the open ocean in a state of the art vessel? It sounded like an adventure he’d have only dreamed of as a child.

2. Afterglow: Regulus propped his elbows up on the railing, leaning forward to look over the edge at the water rushing below.

3. Scars Of A Gold Moon: Remus Lupin had never thought that falling in love would mean he would actually fall. Yet here he is, plummeting through open air, reaching out a hand in slow motion as if another will come to catch him before he hits the ground. He doesn’t know why he expects it. He’s done nothing, less than nothing, to deserve it.

4. I Thought So (Under The Willow): Regulus Black met James Potter for thé first time when he was eleven years old. He liked to tell people he hated the boy the first moment they met. It certainly made him feel better about himself.

5. The Antidote To Exiled Memories: In all his life, Remus doesn’t know if he’s ever felt so colossally, royally, completely fucked.

6. only one night: Remus hated being a werewolf.

7. Insomnia’s a bitch: Remus didn’t know what was wrong with him. He didn’t know why he was up at 2am on what felt like Tuesday night but in reality was Wednesday morning. He didn’t know why he was sat on his bed with his computer open again, not even absorbing the text on the screen.

8. How Could You: Jaren Vallentis was a dead man. Or, at least, he felt like one. He’d certainly never felt less alive than he did now. Not in the bowels of Zalindov. Not when his mother gave him those scars. The closest feeling he could bring to mind was the empty-headed panic he’d felt at seeing Kiva fall fifty feet from the top of the guard tower. Or watching her go under the ice-cold water and not come back up, her foot tied to a bouder. Kiva… Gods, how had this happened?

9. 🐺✨BATB (still doesn’t have a real title lmao) Once upon a time, in a faraway land locked somewhere between winter and spring, there lived a king and queen in a golden cage.

10. Go save the world, I’ll be around: Remus hated three things with every fiber of his being: Tardiness, clumsiness, and obliviousness. Sadly, the thing he loved the very most was all three.

Imma cop out and say whoever sees this can do it too lmao

[daz4i]

oh wait btw another life update (talk of medical shit under the cut) (it's not too graphic or anything but jic) (it's not good tho) (and it's p long)

so 🥲 if you saw my post abt it. i did like a pre-test thing, to see if i even can do a certain test, and that. did not work. so i can't do this test i was prescribed to see if i have crohn's. the doctor gave me like a referral for a stomach mri but due to health insurance stuff they might just say no (bc they normally don't accept it for ppl over 18, unless it's an emergency ig bc i do remember getting one when i was in the hospital to eh) and i'll have to pay a bunch to possibly get another negative answer 😭 not like i have any other options left tho. he did give me some other tests + blood test to see if i have celiac or if there are other signs of some internal inflammation so. ig we'll see.

but the actually extremely bad part is 🥲 he said i mustn't take ibuprofen bc it can harm your intestines esp if you already have a disease there. so. given how that's the only painkiller that actually given me relief. idk how i'm supposed to do even the most basic functioning when my pains get too bad to move (which, esp now due to my heightened stress from the war, happens way more often). i mostly want an official diagnosis for literally anything so i can at least get prescribed smth for the pain alone fr 😭😭😭😭😭

um on a more positive note. my recovery program thingie was approved! starts next week. social worker coming over on wednesday. and. i am very stressed. bc i don't feel ready yet. and the idea that now i can't even take any painkiller means i don't quite know how i'm supposed to start doing the whole functioning thing (mainly they really want me to start going outside i think, esp on my own which i. can't. but i mean ig that's what they're there for. i just hope they don't get tired of me esp since i'm not in therapy) while in excruciating pain. so good fucking luck to me lmao 💔

[figula]

hello

having a bit of a strug with a baby trans woman who has like REALLY imprinted onto me as some kind of guiding force of womanhood (awful notion but i also fully understand it so im not mad or angry just like it makes me a bit uncomfortable) + im finding it like a bit overwhelming bc i really dont have much emotional energy as is atm for obvious reasons so like i know im gonna have to say something (very kindly!!! bc she is so innocent in this + it's literally not her fault at all) but argh im actually so fucking bad at this kind of thing when i actually like the person in question :( it's sooo much easier if they're horrible

was sooo sleepy all day, i had planned on getting a bunch of wig work done this weekend but i just rly haven't... oh well

decided where to get my hair cut this week (probs wednesday) - i was going to go tmr but they are closed on mondays wat... and tina (!!) is on tuesday so im leaving that day otherwise free for general contemplation lol

had really really good sex w/ ben this weekend + i was thinking in the shower about new relationships vs long-term rships + how like new rships are kind of exciting etc but that i actually wouldnt trade what me and ben have now for all the butterflies in any butterfly farm. then i went in and told him this bc im trying to be more demonstrative + also practising for the wedding when i will have to do like PDA. ben's response was literally like "are you ok??? do you think im going to leave you???" SCREAM :( (i tell him i love him allll the time ftr im just naturally a bit more reserved interpersonally than i think i might seem on here lol like i dont really like saying really emotional stuff!! even to the love of my life!!!!) anyway i was just thinking how like the sex in particular has only got better the longer we've been together + how im excited to see where the rest of our lives take us. not just sexually just you know. generally

ben also made me laugh so fucking much the other night when we were watching tiktok videos + we were doing one of those stupid "which one of these would your partner prefer!!" slideshows + he was so appalled by all my food choices for him that he was like "no that's it, we're eating out more, you give me the worst possible options" and writing it down it sounds so unfunny but i was like absolutely cackling at his indignation at my picks omg also, wedding bullshit under the cut, for people who either dont care or are ideologically opposed (correctly)

i paid the final venue payment this eve w/ that money my mum sent me, it was painful to do it lmao but that's done now, knocked a significant chunk off the "to pay" column. think we'll be fine now, ben's got some savings, i still have a decent chunk of money left, im just paranoid that there will be some other random hidden costs that pop up at some point. anyway we're def not going into any debt for it

we wrote our vows today (in like, 10 min) + submitted our ceremonies guidelines to the council. i was a big nuisance while ben was writing his + kept being like "are u crying yet?" then i read his and cried :( lol :( i know a lot of people keep them secret but i think we cba about this one bc we had to upload them to the council website anyway so it would have been a massive hassle to keep them secret. think ben's plan is to do a speech later that im not allowed to see beforehand tho

[lamonnaie]

hi!! gmmtv anon again :)

it feels like they’re trying to catch up with all of their delayed stuff, which is good for them and for us ig. they’re already filming two of the announced shows, and phuwin said they are gonna start filming we are pretty soon - they have three q’s for wednesday club left and filming for we are should start soonish after he’s done with that. also, the interest has already been filmed i think. same goes for my precious which is apparently just a longer version of the movie from what i’ve gathered.

and i just saw that they dropped the wednesday club trailer which is supposed to start airing at the beginning of november (sidenote: i love how they air two eps a week for a lot of their het shows lmao). 23.5 is definitely gonna air in 2024 but we already knew that. cooking crush and last twilight might take over the slote of dangerous romance and only friends. so that would be another two unaired gmm23 shows out of the way.

pls fk also had me fooled. mostly bc they said they were gonna go on stage together and i mean they didn’t lie but damn was i disappointed when it was only for school rangers and the LOL announcement lol.

pond definitely said he was gonna focus on school next year, but idk about joong. i would love for him to do at least another show, preferably with dunk 🤡, since i don’t think he’ll play a huge part in ploy’s yearbook and his arc looks to be a adoptive siblings falling in love with each other story which i’m personally not a fan of.

i’m also very bad at predicitions but i think it’s mostly because i’m heavily biased when it comes to my faves 😭.

oh reddit is on another level fr. i saw the jossgawin rumor and was like oh that would be fun but never in a million years would i have expected them to actually pair them upx and don’t even get me started on the greatinn thing bc i read that post and was like 👁️👄👁️ when i was done

helloo :)

okay when u put it like that, it seems that they're not going too bad for scheduling so far (i'm so glad). wednesday club !!! absolute missed opportunity to not be airing it on wednesdays smh

also i find it so funny that taynew offgun got 2 new shows when their 2023 ones haven't even aired yet 😂😭 gmm rlly said 💲capitalism💲, they know there's a guaranteed audience there so they went for it lmao

WAIT WHAT i did not know it was a stepsiblings story 😭😭 i've seen plenty of that in taiwan, was not expecting gmm to go there hajskdjf. i definitely want more joongdunk, but i also wanna see joong in another het role because he was great in the warp effect (also i just like seeing people outside of their established cps :)) also joylada gang show when?? i wanna see the 4 of them act together so bad 😩😩 it could be the worst show ever and i'd STILL tune in

also its interesting that there were so many rookies cast in shows this time around, i don't think it's usually this many?

that's so real about ur favs tho, if u ask me to make predictions about any het series i will NOT have a clue lmao

honestly half convinced someone on reddit works at gmm at this point, i'm gonna lurk on there for a bit before the next part of announcements and i bet there'll be a guaranteed bingo on my bingo card 😆

[scoups4lyfe]

Journal Entries (4)

Below are entries from my journal, both my real life and online one.

Note: I do (again) --to my felllow writers out there --think that if anyone ever writes a bipolar character, then these entries would be a good look into the kind of mindset someone with bipolar might have <33.

I don't have much else to say :D. so--

[Journal Entries]

��February 23rd 2022 — Wednesday 6:51 PM

Everyday…it seems that no matter how hard I try or dream or wish….I’m not able to accomplish anything. The days stress me out.

Bubbling anxiety fills my gut like locusts.

Gnawing….gnawing….gnawing….gnawing away. I pray (continuously) for the ability to be productive. My lack smothers me and I become just a shadow of the dreamer I was before. What is the color of all this overwhelming emotion? My sights are empty, I’m the only one whose stuck in this abandoned place.

“My time in the bottle 2022” indeed. I am overwhelmed.

My ocean — all these emotions crashing like waves inside me — threatens to drown me. God is my life vest and he holds my head above water. Everyday he says: “Just breathe, all in due time” and I want to believe this so badly, 100% wholeheartedly, yet each day that I fail to move I cling desperately on the very edge of despair. ‘God do you not hear me?’

“I do.” He answers.

“Then what shall I do?”

“Wait.” — I hope the Holy Spirit can renew me, for my hopes suffocate.”

[End of entry]

…

[Friday, April 16th, 2022 — 12:24 AM]

“I feel like a lake slowly withering up. Is it so bad to crave love and attention? Recognition? Is having too much ambition a sin? These dreams are big, and so, so, very heavy. It feels like my back is breaking under its weight. Do you cry at my failures? Are they expected? More often than not I feel built to fail. I wish my psychiatric appointment was sooner. I really want to be able to function like a normal person. What an idea, to be able to do exactly what you set out to do, as you’ve dreamed it. Sometimes I think these dreams are poisoning me. Making me disillusioned, insane. Especially because the difference between dream and reality is enough to drown in.

I don’t want to drown.

Help me. Help me. All I can do is cry out for your help. Please don’t let me drown.”

[End of entry]

NOTE: The rest of the entries I'll be uploaded are from my online journal. I moved journaling to online entries because I didn't have the energy / motivation to write by hand.

…

[Ssat. May 14th 2022]

Monochrome Diamonds.

Today’s title is directly related to the TXT’s “Good boy Gone Bad” MV that I just finished watching like 0.1 seconds ago.

ANYWAYS. Excited cause a new episode of KinnPorsche drops today. I need to live blog for Revice~. I just did a lot of self-care AND cleaned the house so I feel pretty great. Very solid. [End Quote]

… [Sunday, May 15th 2022]

The Sht-storm of Editing

(6:15 PM)

I went to bed at 5:50 AM last night and woke up today at just before 3PM. (12:32 AM — So I guess May 16th, tech) Hmmm. I can’t say that I’ve been all that productive today ngl. Tumblr — that btch — said I ‘hit my media post limit’ because of the amount of sh*t I had in my drafts. Which meant I couldn’t even EDIT my damn drafts LOL!!! Now that it's midnight tho I can edit them but damn that was frustrating, yo. (LMAO)

I also have no idea what I’m doing right now. I….haven’t really accomplished anything today and yeah that’s frustrating, but mostly I’m tired. I’m wondering if this is from Ritalin? Because I *DO* notice a difference when I take Ritalin compared to Adderall. Not 100% sure what it is yet — but I’m gonna go ahead and say it's positive.

My sabbath (sat) was soooooo good. Makes me wish that the weekend was longer. And work isn’t even that hard or bad? Is this just a defeatist mindset?

….

[Monday, May 16th 2022]

The Morning Discussion. A Thousand Dreams. And Small Step

Today feels like a good day to get sht done. Ahhh I’m so ready to finally work towards my goals. I’m really looking forward to writing. And also improving my art skills <33. (6:18 PM) Just got on a call with [Friend]. I need to make sure I get stuff done today :oo. Got some Culver's chocolate ice cream.

…

[Tuesday, May 17th 2022]

The Loser’s guide to Sleep Deprivation

(2:49 PM)

I did not sleep at all last night….. I spent all night reading webtoons and now I feel like sht. Having to work through this both sucks and hurts lmao 😭.

[Insert George and Dream Axolotl video] …

[Thursday, May 19th 2022]

[Sister’s] 20th Birthday

(9:54 PM)

I really clowned myself on accident by not snacking in between 5pm-7pm because my sugar dropped and I got the worst brain fog fking EVER bro. I hate brain fog. Not being able to formulate sentences. Losing your train of thought every 3 seconds. Ughhhh. And even rn I still feel out of it. Though now I’m thinking that’s from the caffeine in the tea rather than anything else :PPP.

(10:26 PM)

I am……out of it, unmotivated, frustrated, and soured like a grape. I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want, I want. I want, I want, I wan-

And yet none of it I do. THere’s always a reason. Always an excuse.

Always something that stops me from moving forward. Is it doubt? Reason? Rationality? It's especially frustrating rn :(((. Man, I can just see someone asking: “Bro there is so much time in a day. How do you even accomplish not a single thing in an entire day?” And dammit! Dammit! WHy! WHy!!!!!Why do essays take me 4 hours to write??? Why does 500 words take me 4 hours??? Why does drawing deplete the clock to zero??? WHY???

How. How. How. How. How. HOw. HOw. How. How. How. How. How. HOw. HOw. Is it the internet???? Should I fast from electronics???? Only write, draw, and learn sh*t offline???? Is THAT the answer?? (Bro I’m gonna go insane. Full on insanity plea. Ahhhghhhh I want to CRY yo.) I can never do anything and the clock tick tick tiCKS away. Like I’m marching to my death. To nothing for nothing to nothing for nothing.

…..

*sighs.* Sometimes I wonder why I exist.

There is something I want to do with EVERY SINGLE PART OF MY BEING — but then what? I’m not able to? I can’t? I’m just going to continue failing? God….I know, I kNOW, I can’t do sht on my own. I’ve well learned THAT lesson. You’ve told me to just show up. To check my priorities. To prioritize you and other ppl in order to get sht done.

And for what??? I’m here-

I’ve showed up!!! [God] — why have you forsaken me? Why does something pop in the way? Why am I unable? Why am I unable even as I desperately cry for help???? Why does my mind fail and break right when I need it most??? Is it my family? What-? Should I go into self-isolation? Block all the world out if it isn’t related to whatever “work” I need to get done???????????????????????

….

[Friday, May 20th, 2022]

My Complaints Just Shan’t End

Okay….so I got to keep my sugar up and make sure I'm getting good nutrition so I don’t die or something serious like that happens. But it's either my family or my body just making that such a hard thing to accomplish.

They barbequed at [Older Sister’s] and damn. I just….man I just CAN’T go over to [My Sister’s House] more than once a week. That’s too much stress. And I didn’t want to spend my whole night there lmao ://

Bro this sucks.

As I said….really just makes me feel hopeless. All I wanna do is shrivel up and cry even tho I’m not sad, just frustrated, anxious, and hopeless. (LOL!!!) Yesterday night ended well though — I practiced Thai, and I’ve been doing more Thai practice >:)))) — and since I stayed home I have been learning the Thai alphabet and practicing my Thai handwriting. Damn I’m still so frustrated though. This is such sht man. This is such sht

…

Sunday. May 22nd, 2022.

The Day That Wasn’t.

…

[Tuesday, May 24th, 2022]

Table of Contents

(7:17 PM)

At the bookstore/cafe [Name of Bookstore / Cafe], working on….idk fiction probably. I have done no writing yet LOL!!!! So here I gooooo.

10:00 PM)

:).

…

[Wednesday, May 25th, 2022]

Re. Vice. And the Sleep Deprived Day

(10:11 am)

I haven’t slept yet.

Revice. Revice. Revice. Revice. Revice. Revice. Revice.

✨✨Revice~✨✨

…..Gosssh I love Revice and I love liveblogging. I don’t know where I went wrong (along the way) but yaish. (Time always got to be my #1 enemy).

…I should probably get some sleep. I’ve really just been goofing around — watched Kang Daniel’s new music video, I want to re-watch TXT’s GBGB Performance. I have the Chinese drama ‘Be Reborn’ up because I want to watch it but I don't want to watch it so I’ve been trying to re-watch my favorite scenes from episode 5 (lol).

[Yesterday in recap]

…Wrote maybe 100 words? I was NOT flowing at all. That and the brain fog was for real. Which….is very frustrating?? Why is it that whenever I start to get serious about getting work done and being productive something creeps up and smacks me in the face, completely preventing me from getting anything, ANYTHING done.

????? WHY??? (아버지. ???)

왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜. 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜.왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜.왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜.왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜.왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜 왜.

…

[Friday. May 27th, 2022]

Everything was going great….Until it wasn't.

(11:30 PM)

Okay, so. The entire first half of the day was great…but what the fck am I doing right now??? It's like sudden insanity hit me out of nowhere and now I just??? Like my stomach is lightning in a bottle.

And I’m tired. SO tired. But not sleepy.

This sucks. I hate this. Thanks tho God <333. I’ll try and idk??? Outlast this nonsense I guess? Naw, but I don’t even know how to describe this feeling??? I just feel…everything. It’s indecipherable and mixed together and it feels like my insides are on fire.

.................

NOTE: So this is the end of part 4. I talk about God a lot in these entries LOL. Whenever I'm going through something extremely difficult I pray (I mean, I do normally too but that's not the point). This is why I was fascinated with the religious themes in DPR Ian's MVS. When you're in an episode or transitioning into one it can feel like you've been abandoned, and so I perfectly understood what Ian was putting down (LOL).

Right. I'll be posting the next powerpoint part soon.

[Prev] [Next]

PPT Essay: [1], [2], [3], [4], [5], [6]

PPT Essay Extras: (1), (2), (3)

Visuals of a Depressive Episode: (1), (2)

Journal Entries: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

[snickerdoodlles]

still processing ep11 but in the meantime, i wanna yell real quick about the its ending--

this is the ending (~1k ish or so) for the fic that this WIP snippet comes from. context is pat and pran shared some old fantasies with each other, now they’re imagining some potential 'what if' scenarios together.

generally, i don’t share fic endings before the rest of the story’s finished for obvious reasons, but this WIP’s been chilling in my drive since ep6. i’ve had this written for weeks and i’ve wanted to share it so badly, and then canon gave me that family sharing montage, so here u go: patpran pretending they could visit each others’ families like normal boyfriends

):)  (:(

“Hey Pat,” Pran asks, nuzzling against Pat’s shoulder for comfort. “What’d it’d be like? Going to your place for dinner?”

“…Huh?”

Pran shrugs and doesn’t quite meet his eyes as he says in a lofty tone, “What? Going to dinner with your boyfriend’s parents is important. I know you like to wing it, but I like to be prepared.”

Pat stares at him blankly before Pran’s words finally line up properly in his head in an oh. The scene blooms before him, stealing his breath and shooting him to the stratosphere. Pran, sitting in his parents’ living room, at their table, welcomed and at home because he has every right to be there as Pat’s boyfriend. Pat swallows harshly, his throat tight and itchy with want. “Well,” Pat says hoarsely, “I should first warn you that my dad and I eat from the serving spoons when we’re really hungry.”

Pran flinches back in such visceral horror that Pat can’t help but laugh. “Pat,” Pran says stiffly and disbelievingly, “that’s disgusting.”

“We wouldn’t do it on the first visit,” Pat insists. Pran perks up at the mention of first, and Pat’s heart thumps painfully at the idea as well. “We’d be on our best behavior then! But we’d slip up. Eventually.”

Pran shivers at the ‘eventually’. “Do not eat from the serving spoon when you meet my parents,” Pran implores in an impressively level tone for someone with goosebumps up his arms. “No amount of flowers would make up for that.”

Pat snickers. “You’d have to keep me in line until at least the fifteenth visit.”

“Nah, it wouldn’t take that long.” Pat raises his eyebrows in question and Pran raises his own in turn. “Oh, come on Mr. Dumpling. You’d bring her flowers and gifts every time we visited, no matter how many times we’d tell you not to, and you’d compliment her cooking every bite. You’ll have her charmed in no time.”

“Enough to eat from the serving spoon and still have her forgiveness?”

Pran sighs, resigned and despairing. “Yes. Even then.”

Pat laughs brightly. “Well that’s good. My boyfriend already loves me and all my bad habits, but his parents won’t give me his hand in marriage if they can’t stand my manners.” Pat wiggles as Pran rolls his eyes. “So I’ve charmed your mom; what about your dad?”

But Pran’s already shaking his head. “No need. My dad would love you.”

“Oh? Why are you saying that like a warning?”

Pat grins. “He’ll try to find something in common with you,” he says, mock solemnly, “and he’ll start with music. But we all know you only live on pop.”

His boyfriend is such a brat. “Are you saying I don’t know my concerto?!”

Pran gives out a little shtinck as he tries and fails to hold back his laughter. “Do you even know what concerto is?”

Well, okay, he has him there. Pat straightens and gathers his dignity. “I’d study up before we went.”

Pran buries his laughter in Pat’s shoulder. “Study?”

“Mm!” Pran’s still giggling and Pat presses a kiss to his neck. “See, my boyfriend's very dignified and cultured, so his parents must be too. And I’ll want to make a good impression.”

Pran looks up, still trying to hold in his laughter. “Want me to make you flash cards babe?”

“They’d be much appreciated.”

Pran collapses against him laughing. “Well, I’d have to use you for practice in turn.”

“Oh?”

Pran looks up at him, eyes shining. “Well, my boyfriend's pretty charming,” he says, grin growing as Pat pinks and preens happily at the praise, “and I want to make sure his family loves me.”

He imagines Pran at their dinner table again, and his chest is so tight it takes him a few tries to speak. “My mother would be charmed the minute you walked through the door,” he says, eyes stinging. “Actually, she’ll already love you just from my calls home, but then you’d be so polite and well mannered, she’d be calling you her favorite son by the second visit.”

Pran hides in the crook of his neck again, his flushed cheeks hot against Pat’s skin. “Embarrassing for you,” he mutters, like Pat can’t feel his smile.

Pat shrugs with his unoccupied shoulder. “Maybe. But you better watch out for my sister.”

“Oh, is she the tough nut to crack?”

“Mhmm. My mom’s going to say, ‘Why aren’t my kids so well behaved?’ and she’ll be mad she’s not as polite as you. My dad’s going to say, ‘Pat’s boyfriend is so accomplished!’ and she’ll be mad there’s another person for them to compare her to.”

Pran hisses in sympathy. “I’m gonna have to spoil her a lot to overcome that opposition.”

Pat snorts. “Oh, the spoiling would happen regardless. Give up now—She’s a master and you’re gonna be dancing in her palm for the rest of your life.” Pran snickers. Pat hugs him close and whispers conspiratorially, “You’d secretly be her favorite though.”

Pran looks up, eyes shining through his lashes. “Yeah?”

“Mm.” Pat rubs his nose against Pran’s, unable to resist. “See, if my boyfriend came to visit, I’d want to make the best impression. I’d clean the whole house, do everyone’s laundry, even clean the dishes just for you.”

“Cleaning, laundry, and the dishes?” Pran considers carefully, and then in a tone heavy with unfortunate self-realization, “Yup, that’d do it for me.” Pat laughs and Pran’s grin turns just a bit mean. “Even though I’d already know alllll about your dirty habits.”

Pat gasps. “But I hid them so well!”

Pran shrugs, lower lip pushed out in a taunting pout. “Yeah. But one time Pa wasn’t here to help you clean your room and I found your dirty laundry hiding under your bathroom sink.”

Pat laughs, because he would, and Pran pulls him for a kiss. He sinks into it and Pran kisses the laughter off his lips until he’s dazed with want and warmth.

Pran holds him close when they break apart, keeps their foreheads pressed together. His nose brushes Pat’s on his next inhale. A tear slides down his cheek and gets caught by Pat’s palm still cradling his cheek.

“Hey Pat?”

“Mm?”

“I really hope I get to meet your family one day.”

Pat breathes out, shaky, as he imagines this little fantasy of Pran meeting his true family become reality. He imagines Pran blushing as Pat’s pa brags about him to his customers just as much as he does his own kids, imagines Ma hints for him to bring Pran home with him on his visits growing more and more overt with each phone call home. He imagines getting to know the people Pran loves—his awkwardly shy father, his clever and teasing mother—instead of the petty neighbors of his childhood. A tear trails down his cheek and gets brushed away by Pran’s gentle thumb.

“Me too, Pran.

“Me too.”

):)  (:(

[memento-morri-writes]

Happy Blorbo Blursday, Morri! I feel like I don't know much about Captain Blackthorne aside from the basics. so, i guess i'd love to see you give the spotlight to him! hoping you have a great day ahead! :3 - 🔮⛈ (@enchanted-lightning-aes)

Hi Enchant! Thanks for the ask!! <3

So, Captain Blackthorne is, as expected, Fallon's Captain of the Guard. He used to be one of her mother's personal guards, until she was murdered. He's roughly 47 years old (ages are hard), and he's known Fallon since she was born.

His first name is Xavier, and he has a kind face, dark hair that's going grey, and smile lines. I love him to death. Also, he loves dogs and kids. He would make the best dad ever, if he had had children. He sees Fallon as his daughter though, so that makes up for things, right??

He's very protective of her, partly because he sees her as his daughter, and partly because of his guilt surrounding Rosalynn's death. (More on that under the cut.)

A longer backstory under the cut, because I love this man, and have a lot of thoughts about him. TW for murder / death mention !!

Captain Blackthorne has been a member of the Royal Guard since he was 18-ish? His family has always served the royal family, so he decided to continue the tradition. He’s a very skilled swordsman, as well as clever and organized. These facts, combined with his unwavering loyalty to the Crown and his near-constant good temper made him an excellent choice for Captain. Everyone assumed he would be succeed the current Captain of the Guard when he retired.

He was already a member of the Royal Guard when Fallon was born, so he’s literally known her for her entire life. When he was in his 20’s, Rosalynn (Fallon’s mother, the Queen at the time), selected him to be a member of her personal guard. He remained in this position for years, eventually becoming Her Majesty’s personal guard and frankly, her best friend.

On this night of Rosalynn’s death, he woke to find the alarm had been raised for an intruder in the Palace. He rushed to Her Majesty’s rooms to find her dead. She had been a friend to him as well as a Queen, and the fact that she died when she was supposed to be under his protection nearly broke him.

Heartbroken, he planned to retire from the Guard, but chose to stay when Fallon offered him the position of Captain of the Guard, to replace the previous who had been killed on the night of Rosalynn’s murder. Xavier felt he owed it to Rosalynn to protect Fallon in any way possible, so he agreed to stay.

He partially blames himself for Rosalynn’s death, even though the rational part of his brain knows better. (If spies were easy to catch, they wouldn’t be spies. If assassins couldn’t do their job, they’d be dead.) But he still feels a little guilty, and that’s part of the reason he is so very protective of Fallon.

Though he’d never admit it, his worst fear is failing to protect Fallon (and thus failing Rosalynn), and he sometimes dreams about the night of Rosalynn’s death, but it’s Fallon there instead. :’(

BONUS FACTS: - He never married or had children, instead dedicating his time to the Guard, but he would absolutley be the best grandpa/dad ever. - He has a heart of gold and it takes a lot to make him angry. - He has been accidentally called Dad by young recruits on no less than 6 occasions. (They all get really embarassed, but Blackthorne thinks it’s cute.) - He low-key views Fallon as his daughter. - He also loves dogs and will absolutely lose his shit over any kind of puppy.

[hwanchaesong]

ATEEZ as your sugar daddy:

a/n: this has vulgar words so minors dni pls, scroll down and read some fluff

Hongjoong

using dating apps to find a sugar daddy who would pay for your tuition fee is the last resort

and you were just about to give up when all you see are old perverted men

that is until you stumbled on his account

young, handsome, rich, not looking for commitment, goodness aren't you lucky to find your perfect match

you two met each other for the first time in a cafe

him laying out the grounds and rules that the two of you will follow, and you nodding along bc what can you even say

you're the one that needs the money, not him, so all you can do is listen and agree

he made you follow a strict schedule, Monday, Wednesday, Saturday meet ups in this hotel at exactly 8:30 PM

after all the sessions, he always give you the same exact amount of money every time

enough to pay your bills, but also more than so that you can buy the things that you want

you were late once and you paid dearly for it, hickeys loitered in your body and limping around for days

he's kinda small in stature so you weren't expecting much from him

lmao what a joke

he made you cry on your first time together with how devilish he is in bed

what you didn't know is he's a very jealous, possessive man

one thursday morning, he saw you with a random guy at a restaurant, giggling and playfully hitting him at something that he said

wow, what the hell is that, he's here and yet you have the audacity to hit on other men?

you were shocked when he called you later that night, telling you to come to his house and that you'll have to 'talk'

turns out, the talk is him spanking you, denying you of your orgasms, overstimulating you, and overall a punishment that you would be willing to experience again

"I am the only man you need, understand? Meet up with other men one more time and let's see what will happen to you, kitten."

SugarDaddy!Hongjoong Oneshot

Park Seonghwa

baby sitting his daughter to earn extra money may be the worst or best thing in your life that ever happened

it's the best because you earn money by looking after a child who doesn't give you any headaches at all

it's the worst because it means you have to see the child's hot af father everyday

everyday is becoming more and more difficult for you

how can you not stare at his well sculpted body?

or even think of what his tongue can do when he darts it out everytime like a chameleon

he even dares to remove his shirt in front of you when he just finished working out

you were about to explode and accuse him of doing it on purpose

in which you got your answer without even asking him

you just found yourself under him without any clothes on, moaning and telling him not to stop fucking you until you pass out

after that intense session, you noticed that the money he gives you are more than before

you won't complain, more money and great sex pft, where would you even get that in this era

you're basically living there at this point, with the little amount of time you spend in your own home

sometimes, things feel so domestic

the two of you doing household chores, eating breakfast together, tucking his daughter in bed

now is not the time to dwell on it tho, not when his tongue is deep inside you with his hands on your boobs

getting freaky before sleeping is a must, then his daughter decided to enter the bedroom

you and Seonghwa shuffled, hiding what you were doing under the covers when his daughter called you, no, not your name

Seonghwa smirks at you, liking the sound of it

"Well, she can't sleep, what are you gonna do about it, 'mommy'?"

SugarDaddy!Seonghwa Oneshot

Yunho

you caught his eye when he visited the convenience store you're working at

there you are working the early morning shift, 2 AM to be exact

your uniform slightly unbuttoned at the top and tight pants are giving him things to imagine

he was about to leave when you crouched down, picking up something that you dropped on the floor

giving him a nice view of your cleavage

okay, that's it, he's a man full of needs and the busy months of being a business man did nothing to satiate that

he waited for you outside your workplace, approaching you when you finally come out to go home

his looming height intimated you, wanting to run away but he caught your arm, pulling you back into him

there must have been a reason why you're working at such a young age

turns out that you've been saving money to continue your studies in a good university

dw, yunho will pay all of your expenses if you just lend your body to him in return

you declined at first, but when you saw him pull out a black card from his wallet, you lost it

that night he took you home and made you his, ecstatic even when he learned that he is your first time

your financial status is not a concern anymore, rather it was yunho himself

recently, he's been weird

just wanting to hang out with you, spend time without even having sex

you thought it was unfair if he's giving you money but he doesn't get the other side of the coin

so one night, you boldly straddled him, grinding in his crotch, wanting answers to his actions

he groans, placing his hands on your hips before leaning in closer to whisper in your ear

"I don't want anymore meaningless sex with you, I will only touch you again when we are an official couple. I love you, princess, and I want to make you feel good inside and out."

SugarDaddy!Yunho Oneshot

Yeosang

well, who would've thought that a famous model like him would take an interest in a lowly student like you

no one of course, who would even think a mature man would have a kink towards young and innocent girls like you

he coincidentally saw you being harassed by some thugs

like a shining armor, he jumped in to save you

only to think that he wants to corrupt you when you looked at him with such pure, thankful eyes

the next day, he came to you with gifts

he bought you pretty dresses and jewelries, then made you come with him in a fancy restaurant

you feel like you're in a fairytale

except your prince charming doesn't plan on giving you a kiss at the end of the day, or let you leave at midnight

no, he wants to bring you home at midnight and fuck you til morning

so he did just that, he didn't woo you with all those expensive shit just for you to leave him hanging

and that is how you find a sugar daddy that literally made you his doll

on the other hand, you love it

the feeling of getting pampered that you never got from your own family or relatives

you enjoy his full attention

his hands and lips on your body

the way he thrusts into you, his smirk and chuckle when you beg him for more

his sweet gestures and aftercare

the kisses on your nose and cuddles

you love everything about him (shit)

he'll never know, that's it

yes he'll know, especially when you talk to yourself infront of the mirror, convincing yourself that you should be contented with what you have

so he barged in the room, kissing you so passionately that it made your head spin

"The feelings are mutual, doll, so what do you say we get one round in before setting up our marriage?"

SugarDaddy!Yeosang Oneshot

San

regret is the only thing you feel now when your taekwondo instructor touched you to correct your position

why did you even enroll in a self defense class?

you can just buy a damn pepper spray to spill into the eyes of your kidnapper

then someone told you that it won't work all the time

damn it, you were thinking out loud weren't you?

you panted after doing some kicks, and that made San smirk because it sounded so sensual in his ears

oh, how lovely would it be if he heard that with you underneath him

lady luck seems to be on his side when he saw you at the grocery store after the lessons

seeming to have problems with your bills

so he paid for your items, coolly slamming down his black card and winking at you

he's even nice enough to drive you back home, saying that it's dark and there are a lot of creeps on the street

you didn't have enough money today because you had to pay for his taekwondo lessons, alright

he'll compromise, he will not make you pay his lessons anymore, buy you your groceries in exchange of an another lesson

that lesson ended up with the two of you at the backseat of his car, fogging the windows up with the amount of heat the two you are producing

San's dream of making you pant under him turned into reality, and he wanted to hear more

his stamina is crazy, can go multiple rounds leaving you breathless

and his damn hips make you see stars as you reach utopia

a truly wild man but such a child outside of bedroom

you question him as to why he's such an intense person in bed but becomes so adorable af afterwards

"babe, I allow myself to be like this around you because I trust you, and you should as well. So, will you please cuddle me, I'm cold, unless you want to heat me up with a blowjob?"

SugarDaddy!San Oneshot

Mingi

why the hell would they give you a sexy tutor like him? you'll never know the answer

Mingi can be a bit childish sometimes, but he gets the job done

he just did a little bit of motivating for you to be able to learn faster

and that includes wrecking you and giving you gifts that you may or may not need

you don't understand much of your dynamics

just one day he kissed you, made you cum on his fingers when you got all the questions right in his pre-test before your exams

then when you passed your exams with high marks, he gave you the latest iphone model with a bonus of him fucking you from behind

he gives you rewards for being obedient, and punishes you for being a brat

his methods always work like magic, but it seems like it's useless against this literature topic

why would they even give you an assignment that requires you to write a ten pages essay about love

what do you even know about it

all the while you're brainstorming about what to write, Mingi was looking intently at you

he doesn't like seeing you get stressed, so he did the best thing that he could do

he stood up and carried you bridal style, bringing you away from your work

he plopped you onto the bed, making you squeal but it was replaced by a moan when he sucked on your sensitive spot

here we go again, his large hands doing wonders in your body

his tongue making you squirm in his hold

and his godforsaken technique in fucking you so right made you release all the pent up frustrations

what surprised you is the sudden affection from him

hugging you close to him and peppering kisses on your face afterwards

"Write about me, it's about love right? I know I'm not the only one who feels the spark when we are together, I know you have feelings for me, darling."

SugarDaddy!Mingi Oneshot

Wooyoung

you met him in bar during a rainy, gloomy night

he was downing shots after shots, keen on getting drunk

the hot man is a bit wet, he probably walked here instead of taking a cab or something

you approached him, wanting to have fun tonight

you didn't come to this place just to leave empty-handed

the plan was to seduce him, get you to fuck him, but no, one word from him and the situation was turned around

he was the one who swayed you into bed, the one who fucked your brains out

it was safe to say that you were ashamed of yourself when you saw a picture of him and his wife in his bedroom's side table

but he explained to you that his wife cheated on him and that he's in the middle of divorce

still, you don't plan to continue hooking up with a divorced man

boy you were wrong once again when you find yourself on top of him, riding him like there's no tomorrow in a fancy hotel room

after the session, he gave you an envelope full of money, exchange for the time you gave him

naturally you accepted it, who wouldn't for fucks sake, especially when you're bank account needs a feeding

it continued like that, money exchanged for sex

though you didn't know when the casual fucking turned into love making

it was unusual, him being slow and sensual instead of the usual rough and fast paced thrusts

you'd question wooyoung about your relationship later, wanting to enjoy the feeling of his muscular arms in your body for now

not until he dropped the question first

"I didn't know that I'd feel the rush of emotions like this once again, what do you say we up our relationship, baby girl?"

SugarDaddy!Wooyoung Oneshot

Jongho

dear lord, you'll never know that your substitute pe teacher would be such an eye candy

he wears shorts for your classes and that makes you wetter than the pool in your gym

'shut it self, why are you so thirsty?' you scolded yourself when you find yourself daydreaming about him again

you can't get him off your mind

whenever his thick thighs flexes, it makes you want to ride it

he showed off his strength last time by breaking an apple in half, and how you wished he'd break you instead

okay, too much. distraction. yes. you just need a distraction tonight

what the hell man, who would've thought that your pe instructor would be the owner of the bar that you frequented to

he approached you first, your skimpy dress so alluring that even if he only saw your back, he knows you're a catch

his plan of flirting and making you scream later were scratched when he saw your face

still a catch but he can't fuck his student

and you're making it harder for him to control his urges when you clung into him in your drunk state

okay, whatever, your boobs in his body and your dirty words ain't making things any better so he'll just go with the plan

he paid for your drinks, got you in his car, and you were in for a ride the whole night

when you woke up, an unfamiliar ceiling greeted you

not to mention the arms in your waist and pain in your lower body

then you remembered what happened last night

the kisses, licks, bites, moans, the sex

"Finally you're awake, don't worry I'll pay for your drinks at the bar from now on, I'll even let you do your fantasies on me. Just do me a favor angel, keep this between us."

SugarDaddy!Jongho Oneshot

[meltwonu]

| 𝔲𝔫𝔱𝔦𝔩 𝔦 𝔪𝔢𝔱 𝔶𝔬𝔲 |     [Chapter 1] 

pairing; fratboy!wonwoo x reader

this chapter’s notes; fratboy!wonwoo, dom!wonwoo, dirty talk, masturbation, sex toys, mentions of sexting/sending photos/videos, baby this has hella plot lmao dkhf 🥴💕 WELCOME TO UNTIL I MET YOU!! THE MINI-SEQUEL TO CAFFEINE! A bit of a shorter chapter but I didn’t want to overload with too much everything in the first chapter, ykwim? 😎 Thank you so much for your patience with this sequel, I know there were a ton of people asking for a sequel for months after I said I would 💕😭😭 As always, inbox roundup tomorrow! And don’t forget, next chapter for UIMY goes up on Feb 26th! T|H ch 1 next Friday! 🥰💕 Enjoy ch 1, have a great weekend and I love you! 💕

chapters; 1 - x - x - x - x

“Mmh… Wonwoo…”

His hands roam all over your naked body; warmth spreading all over when he digs his blunt fingernails into the skin of your waist.

“Feels good, doesn’t it? Did you miss me, sweetheart?” His voice is soft, gentle, yet teasing; barely above a whisper as your back bows off of the bed to lean into his simple touches. “I missed you, sweetheart. Missed your ‘lil cunt too.”

A choked sob falls from your lips, followed quickly by rushed, hurried cries for Wonwoo to move faster.

“Don’t you want me to take my time? We haven’t seen each other in months.” 

There’s a smirk on his lips, eyes twinkling with mischief when you reply back with a shaky whine. “Don’t you want me to slide my cock into your pretty ‘lil pussy nice ‘n slow? Let you feel every inch of me filling you up, just like it’s the first time all over again.” He stares at you dreamily; fixated on the way your body chases his hands when he drags them down to your thighs. “Or would you prefer it if I fucked you hard and fast? Your cute body squirming and trembling from how good I give it to you and my cock slamming into your tight ‘lil cunt.”

Wonwoo’s fingertips spread your folds as he licks his lips; appreciating how wet you already were for him.

“Bet your toys don’t feel as good as the real thing, huh?”

You shake your head ‘no’ furiously, “N-no, god, no! Wonwoo, p-please!” The male grins down at you, pouting mockingly at your desperate, pleading eyes. 

The wetness between your legs is unbearable and the sobs are caught in your throat when Wonwoo leans over you, lips ghosting across your own.

“Okay. Just say--”

You’re shocked awake by your alarm clock; chest heaving in deep breaths as you sit up in your crumpled sheets. “Oh, fuck...” Groaning, your clammy palms reach for the ringing device as you shut it off and sigh.

The clock reads 10:02AM; tired eyes trying to blink away the sleep that threatens to take you back to the dreamland you much preferred. Although, dreaming about Wonwoo was becoming a little bit too common these last few days.

Sighing once more, you move to get out of bed; already finding your panties soaking wet and sticking to you like a second skin when you stand.

“Ugh... Damn it.”

You press the vibrator harder onto your clit; teeth chattering with the pleasure that pours over your body.

“Oh, god, please, p-please…”

Images of Wonwoo dance behind your eyelids; sultry smirks and teasing glances bringing you closer and closer to the edge of an orgasm.

If there was anything that the last few months without Wonwoo taught you, it was that you couldn’t afford to lose him - in more ways than one. And despite his lack of calls or even text messages, you held out in hopes he still felt the same way that you did despite the distance.

You sent him pictures and videos of yourself often; teasing images half naked, toys in hand, and videos crying out his name while you came. And while he took the time to reply to those with praise and adoration, he almost never sent anything back. 

When he did, it was always short, clipped replies of how exhausted he was and how he didn’t have much time.

“Ngh, h-harder…” Your toes curl against the bedsheet; phantom feelings of his cock fucking you hard and deep making you cry out in desperation to be filled by his cock.

Your phone rings on the nightstand next to you as you cum - vibrator pressed so hard against your clit that your back bows off of the sheets while your thighs shake uncontrollably. 

And for the first time in a long time, it’s an orgasm that feels like it’s worth something.

‘Gyu: hey did wonwoo text u?

‘Gyu: he’s back next monday he said

‘Gyu: idk abt classes tho, might be out of commission for a while bc jetlag

‘Gyu: thinking abt throwing him a party on friday after he comes back...

‘Gyu: u wanna plan with us orrrrr? U got a private party or sth 🥴😏

‘Gyu: lmk

You’re nervous. Shy, even.

After you’d come down from your orgasm and checked your phone, your mind momentarily went blank from shock and the first thing you’d done was text Wonwoo to ask if he was really coming back that soon.

‘Ah, yeah, I was just about to text you. Prof said we can go home early if we wanted since we finished up classes. I’ll see you sometime next week? Jetlag and stuff.’, was all he had said and in your excited state, the only thing you had responded with was an, ‘Okay, great!’, without asking when, where, or what time.

You figured you’d give him some time to readjust instead of bombarding him as soon as he got in. But each second that you knew Wonwoo was home, you found yourself itching to just be in his presence.

You just had to be a little more patient.

Wednesday morning comes and you find yourself skipping your morning class to go to the library.

For studying, you tell yourself.

The male at the receptionist table shoots you a small smile to which you awkwardly smile back before ducking into an empty aisle. All you knew was that it seemed like Wonwoo wasn’t here.

Maybe he’s still at the frat house, you wonder.

Sighing slightly under your breath, you decide that maybe getting some work done would actually help distract you from looking for the male.

You find an empty table, setting your things down before pulling out your phone. 

In all honesty, you weren’t even sure why you were being so shy and nervous about contacting Wonwoo, especially when you so unabashedly sent him nudes every few days when he was away. 

Although, with how things had been before he left and the prospect of actually dating once he came back from his semester abroad - the butterflies in your stomach had been nonstop with the different scenarios that played out in your head. You’d even gone so far as to plan what happened if Wonwoo had decided he didn’t want to make an attempt at dating you.

“Sweetheart?”

The grip you have on your phone only tightens as you whip your head around to find Wonwoo standing behind your chair and you swear your heart stops beating the same time your breath gets caught in your throat. “H-huh?”

He smiles gently down at you and you can’t help but wonder how long you were spaced out to not notice him there. 

“Is this a dream too?” You wonder aloud - Wonwoo chuckling in response as he moves to collect your things for you.

“Have you been dreaming about me that much, sweetheart?” You stutter and stumble over your words; embarrassment eating at you every second that Wonwoo has a knowing smile plastered on his lips.

“C’mon, let’s go get something to eat since we both know you’re not really here to study.”

The version of Wonwoo that sits across the cafe table is… different.

Not bad, just different.

His arms are much tanner and definitely more muscular and the glasses missing from his face lets you appreciate his eyes even more when they’re not hidden behind the thick frames. He had even opted to wear a sleeveless shirt; something that you weren’t used to when he usually was around campus in long sleeves and sweater vests.

Although, you can’t and won’t deny the way your body reacts to this Wonwoo.

“Hey, I’m talking to you and you’re just spacing out.” Muttering, he leans over the small cafe table until his face is only inches away from yours and the smirk on his lips already lets you know that you’ve been caught staring.

“Listen, I know I’ve been gone for three months but you’re lookin’ at me like you haven’t had a fix in all that time.” Your lips press into an embarrassed firm line, avoiding his stare as he raises a brow at you.

“Wait, you didn’t fuck anyone in the three months I was gone?”

“No… did you?” Your voice is barely above a whisper; a little afraid that his answer will be ‘yes’ when he takes a second longer to respond.

“Nah,” He settles back into his seat, “I told you, didn’t I? I was willing to try the whole… dating, relationship thing with you when I got back. Although, I’m somewhat surprised one of the others didn’t try to seduce you while I was gone.”

You laugh slightly, cheeks warm as Wonwoo teases. “I wouldn’t have given them the time of day anyway.”

Your entire body burns hot, palms clammy in your lap from how giddy you were to be with Wonwoo and it made your heart do backflips knowing that he’d still been willing to try with you.

“Ah, how was it abroad anyway? You… didn’t really say much over the past few months so I feel like I don’t know how you were. Just some messages about how tired you were...” He takes a sip of his coffee; unintentionally making you internally scream when his lips form a pout while he thinks.

“Honestly? Other than the days we were excavating ‘n stuff, it was pretty boring. Really hectic though, and a lot of documenting which meant a lot of paperwork. I swear, I closed my eyes and I saw the inside of my textbooks.” He chuckles lightly, eyes focused on the cup of coffee in front of him.

“I just want to say sorry for my lack of communication. I really didn’t expect to be so busy that I couldn’t even pick up a call.” There’s a genuine apologetic look on Wonwoo’s face when he looks back at you. “And the time difference was really rough too. I didn’t want to take it out on you over the phone if I was stressed about not sleeping or the workload. I know we can get a little rough when we ‘play’ but this wasn’t that and it wouldn’t have been fair.”

Oh.

“T-that’s okay, I understand!” Your heart does somersaults in your chest, “I--thank you for thinking about me too.”

The feelings you have bubbling up inside of you make you feel like you’re falling in love for the first time, all over again. “Um… Sorry I sent so many pictures ‘n stuff.”

Wonwoo laughs, this time throwing his head back slightly before he tries to hide his wide grin. “Oh, sweetheart. Don’t apologize.” Your eyes meet his and for a split second, you see the familiar dominating look in his eyes before he leans over the small cafe table again.

“I might’ve not had all the time to entertain you those times but I thought about you alllll the time. I missed everything about you.” His voice is barely above a whisper - careful to not let anyone else in the cafe hear the topic of conversation. “Which, by the way…You piqued my interest earlier with your question. You never really answered my question about having dreams about me.”

You shift in your seat as you avert your eyes from his; eyes flitting down his toned body instead as you mentally curse yourself.

“I… kinda? I m-mean… not normally but just--just these last few days. It’s almost been every night… I wake up and--and it’s just… I’m...” You trail off; somewhat shy to say the rest of what you were going to say even though you’re almost certain Wonwoo already knows.

“Odd. Me too. I kept dreaming about you, which is, honestly, kind of why I thought to come back earlier.”

“Oh?”

“Mm, we still had 2 weeks left, technically. A bit of a spillover since my professor wanted us to explore the city once finals were over. But I just wanted to come home.” He finishes with a chuckle - a soft look in his eyes.

You pout back at him, “You didn’t come home early just for ‘lil ‘ol me, did you?” You say it jokingly, but deep down you do wonder.

“Would that be so bad?” Grinning, Wonwoo sets a couple of bills down onto the table to cover the meals you both barely have touched.

“Like I said, I missed everything about you, sweetheart.”

Wonwoo walks you back to your place afterwards; laughing and joking with you as if he hadn’t been gone for the last 3 months. 

There’s a certain playfulness about him that makes your heart bloom and part of you wonders if he’s opening up to you more now that there’d been some time apart.

“Are you gonna be working at the library again? Or is that done forever now?” “Mm.. I mean, it’d be kind of weird if I stopped, don’t you think?”

The grin of his face is telling and you have to mentally stop yourself from letting your mind wander in the middle of the sidewalk. “Y-yeah... Studying in my apartment isn’t really the same, y’know…”

Laughing, Wonwoo takes the opportunity to swing an arm around your shoulder as he tucks you under his arm. “I was actually at the library earlier to ask about my position back. I start tomorrow.” Goosebumps rise on your skin and the close proximity is enough to make you whimper.

“I’m only taking two classes this semester to give myself a bit of a break so I’ll be in the library more often to fill up the time. You can always call me if you need to know where I am. I promise I’ll respond this time, sweetheart.”

Before you know it, the two of you are already standing outside of your complex as Wonwoo takes his arm off of you.

“Will I be seeing you tomorrow?” There’s a hopeful lilt to his voice that has you nodding feverishly in return.

“I have a morning class but I’ll come by in the afternoon? I can text you to let you know, just in case.” You offer back.

Wonwoo licks his lips, tilting his head before leaning down and kissing you on the forehead.

The soft gesture momentarily throws you off as you freeze but the smoldering look in Wonwoo’s eyes when he pulls away lets you know that he’s already scheming.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, sweetheart.”

[extervus]

i want to hear the infodump about Midwestern weather patterns

*grips you*

Okay this is going to get rambly and I'm typing this on my phone but I'm gonna do my best to keep it somewhat organized as well as readable. For context, I live in the greater KC area, which in recent years, has been gettin put further and further into tornado alley (it's currently moving northward and eastward), tho it's still not technically considered fully in tornado's alley (yet). That being said, I'm still really into tornados and weather in general, and do a lot of amateur + freelance storm chasing when it's in season (which I've posted about a couple of times in the past), so not only do I just like know a lot about weather from learning about it, but I've got a lot of like. Hands on experience lmao

(quick note: it's been a couple of years since I've done anything meteorology related in an official and proper setting, and as such, a lot of official terminology has wiped itself from my brain and been replaced with how I describe things in my own head. I may go back thru and edit anything that needs to be edited but for now I'm just free typing as it comes to my mind, and some things may be a lil off in terms of wording)

Anyways, to begin, I'm gonna briefly talk about a couple of things: air masses and the jet stream. Both are fairly easy to understand, and closely related. Different air masses + the wind that drives them originate from different parts of the country (moist, warm air moving northward from the gulf of Mexico (mT); cool, dry air moving southeast from Canada/Alaska (cP); and hot, dry air moving northeast from the southwestern States/Mexico (cT)). Now, as you can see, with the sliiiiight exception of the cP air mass, pretty much all air moves in a generally eastward direction. This is because of the jet stream, or the westerlies, as they're called in our part of the world (westerlies because wind is always described, professionally, by which way it's COMING from). The jet stream- comprised of high atmosphere and extremely high speed winds- pushes these air masses along- again, generally- from west to east.

However, sometimes the jet stream can look like this:

(from 5am on Wednesday October 26th. I use this website a LOT in the summer because jet stream placement can have a lot to do with tornado formation)

Lil weird lookin, right? Not quite perfectly west to east, is it? This of course is wind patterns that is more in fashion with fall, obviously, and thus isn't great for tornado/storm formation, but keep this in mind regardless.

Anyways, so we have a bunch of air masses being pushed along by this very powerful jet stream. As we've seen, they're generally pushed eastward, but it's not quite a straight push, is it? And based on the descriptions of the directions they're being pushed in, it sounds like they're gonna meet each other somewhere, right? Let's see where that would be

(I actually don't care for this specific image a lot because it doesn't fully showcase the proper size and shape of the originating air masses, plus the directions are off for cT- which I adjusted with the arrow I drew- but this is one of the most popular air mass images and if you ever take any meteorology class, you will see this picture guaranteed lmao)

Now where do we see a lot of the arrows running in to each other? Let's take a closer look

Ah, the good ol Midwest (okay this picture actually sucks but you get the idea)

Now, when these air masses meet in the middle (specifically, when cP meets either cT or mT), it creates the perfect conditions for turbulent weather (specifically, it creates what we call storm fronts; these form when cool air meets warm air). The deadliest/strongest combination is when cP and cT meet (I think that's a fact, but if not then it's at least what I've noticed firsthand), though cP and mT obvi still creates some powerful ass storms, which of course produces tornados. In both cases, it's even more powerful when the jet stream happens to be the strongest over a particular area. Here's an example of what the jet stream looked like on a particularly stormy night that produced a fuck ton of tornadoes in northern Missouri/most of Iowa (June 11th, 2022)

(unfortunately I didn't save any screenshots of what the storm formation actually looked like, but it was essentially following along where the jet stream was, as well south of it, in the case of the Missouri storms)

It doesn't always happen, but when the jet stream happens to be exactly above where a storm formation is, that's when there's some of the highest chances for a tornado to form. It's hard for me to explain via text, but it basically has to do with faster air being above slower air, which then creates a rolling effect that- if it gets flipped around, creates a tornado. It's not the only way a tornado gets formed, but it's one of the more interesting ways to me, for some reason lmao

Anyways, there's obviously a few other reasons and ways that storms and tornadoes form far more over the Midwestern United States compared to literally anywhere else on earth, but this is the biggest reason (in terms of the air masses).

Another fun way, and a favorite of mine because it's so easy to predict, that storms form is whenever it's cloudy, hot and humid for most of the day, then in the evening, the heat eventually breaks through and creates pockets of sunlight through the clouds, which let's all that energy that was trapped beneath the clouds escape, which then travels up and into the remaining clouds, creating those towering, white anvil-like clouds that produce some powerful ass storms. And some of my favorite types of storms >:)

Here's an example (I have a better one but I took it while I was working a couple years ago and the window has revealing info in the reflection lmao. This one is from October 19, 2019)

Anyways, this has already gone on far longer than I meant it too and that's even while taking a twenty minute break to let my phone charge lmao. There's so much more I could go on about but for everyone's sake, including mine, I'll end it here for now

Actually, just one more fun fact: despite being in a place that's ripe with storms and tornado formation, KC actually sees less storms and subsequent tornadoes than the surrounding areas, and that's because of the skyscrapers here! Specifically, the area to the east of the skyscrapers sees less storms, because the skyscrapers disrupt all but the most powerful of storm formations, causing them to usually pass thru either north or south of the city (while still heading eastward in some way, of course). This is the case, I imagine, in most Midwestern/Southern cities with skyscrapers, but of course I live here so this is where I actually know it to be true.

This isn't to say that they're completely safe from storms or tornadoes (especially if this past summer has anything to say about that), but it does lower the chances by a lot!

Anyways. Thanks @ anon for giving me an infodump pass 🖤🖤