#even ppl im close to they have better friends who theyd rather talk to

[daisyjisung]

sigh 24h loop bass boosted

[batslime]

taggt ( by @wesminator )

Last:

Drink- im schlurpin mtn dew rn

Phone call- my mom to make sure she knew we needed cat food

Text- showing this awful thing to @succubus

Song- ddu-du ddu-du by black pink ( that doesnt even sound the way its spelled and i had to look at it again bc of that )

Time you cried- i dont remember probably while i was watching a movie or smt

Ever:

Been depressed- b o y

Gotten drunk and thrown up- i dont go to parties because i live in the middle of nowhere and ive never been drunk i dont like alcohol enough to get to that point

In the last year have you:

Made new friends- ya

Fallen outta love- YA

Laughed until you cried- no

Found out someone was talking about you- just today my manager told me one of the part time mans texts him to say ive been��“acting up” ( i said something to her she didnt get so i told her not to try so hard bc i could smell the smoke coming from her ears ) and he straight up tells her shes stupid fgvhjb

Met someone who changed you- for the worse yes lmao

Found out who your friends are- I’ve found out who my friends aren’t!

Kissed someone on your Facebook friends list- Maybe???? ive remade it so many times/ never go on i dont remember if i have any exes besides @succubus

General:

Fave color- im always a slut for pink but i also love rich greens and lavender

How many Facebook friends do you know IRL - why is a tumblr meme probably aged at like teenage-twenty year olds even asking about facebook

Any pets - rn i have three cats

Do you wanna change your name - legally ya

What did you do for your last birthday - I dont remember i was probably still at home jobless and sad

What were you doing last night at midnight - working on miniatures

What is something you can’t wait for - @succubus is coming over next month, next paycheck, to get the energy to work on all my projects again, genji nendroid

What are you listening to - i just left blackpink playing after i had to look that title up

Have you ever talked to a person named Tom - idk

Something that gets on your nerves - god everything lately im like a time bomb

Most visited website - Tumblr and Youtube

Hair colour - Black/ dark brown

Hair length - i cut it asymmetrically l recently and shaved it back in march on the sides so its. all over the place

Do you have crush on someone - i have a crush on being a better and more productive and happier and richer person

What do you like about yourself - lets not start this lol

Want any piercing - not rn im too depressed to take care of my body on a regular basis

Blood type-  b+

Nicknames- 

Zodiac - capricorn

Pronouns - She/Her or They/Them is fine.

Fave TV show - I dont watch tv occasionally tho ill go into netflix and play whatevers nice to listen to while i work, like forensic files or movies im really familiar with 

Tattoos - i dont rly like the way they look i think n when i do see designs i like i like seeing them on other ppl, im too fickle for them myself. i used to do designs for ppl tho

Right or left handed - Right-handed

Ever had surgery - to have my teeth removed and tbh id be terrified and i think id really rather just die if i ever needed under-anesthetic under-the-knife surgery for multiple reasons 

Sports - no

Vacation - i like vegas, theres lots of countries id love to see but ive never been out of the states. im too poor and scared to do that rn esp alone

More general:

Eating - i love squishy foods but ive been craving crunchy stuff a lot lately too. ive been getting bowls of ice to take to my room while i work

Drinking- i drink like three things and that mtn dew, water w crystal lite, and match fraps

About to watch- i dont watch stuff much i just play whatever i can presently stand hearing while i work

Waiting to-

Get married - god no i literally just wanna live alone i dont wanna have to see people in my house while im trying to force myself to work or walking around naked i dont wanna be responsible for another person

Which is better:

Hugs or kisses - i dont like to be tocuhed

Lips or eyes - 

Shorter or taller -  

Nice arms or stomach -  these are like. really obscure selections 

Troublemaker or hesitant -  

Have you ever:

Kissed a stranger - no

Drunk hard liquor - no

Lost glasses - yeah i just toss em at the end of my bed at night

Turned someone down - um i work retail and look like a teenager i can hardly fucking go in public without some random ugly ass dude thinking he can talk to me lol 

Been arrested - no

Cried when someone died - i dont think so just animals as far as i can recall, i havent lost anyone close.

Fallen for a friend - ya

Do you believe in:

Yourself - Yeh boi!

st sight - for like animals or shows or smt. if youre talking about another person. thats called attraction and calling it love is creepy and unhealthy and an obsolete concept that we need to nip in the ass tbh. i hear a disproportionate amnt of guys to girls say this and its like always someone they meet in public or whatever. im sure if i were desperate and self hating enough to humor any of the losers who try me theyd say it like five years down the line too. you dont know who tf somebody really is til youve known them for years and gone though real shit and seen how they respond. ive always found “love at first sight” creepy 

Kiss on the first date - idk

Angels - maybe

Others:

Best friend’s name - i call her a disgrace and the cause of my death but other ppl call her franky/ alexa 

Eye colour - Brown

Fave movie - 

Fave actors -

franky ive already tagged you like eight times. also im done working for the day. if you wanna be tagged reblog it and tag yourself im not doing anything else for any more people today 

[eppaljeck]

but uh what i wanted to say was aside from normal regular friends tht talk to me i also need like a close On Line friend whos also like a therapist or a psychiatrist or smthn cuz like the only thing anyone can ever think of when i actually ask them to tell me How they expect me to get better that doesnt involve me killing myself they always say like Get A Therapist but aside from it not actually being that fucking simple in this country ive Been to therapy and they discharged me cuz they thought i was fine cuz therapy doesnt fuckin work for me and aside from th fact tht my mum was always in the room with me id rather fucking die than talk about issues or Drama that arent happening right that second like i dont wanna tell them shit thats Over now cuz its over its done i wanna move on and since things happen practically 24/7 theres a LOT that they never actually hear about fuck im even supposed to be going to the school counselor and even she doesnt know jack fucking shit abt What Goes On the only possible way i can tell someone my problems is if theyr on this fucking website reading my posts and talking to me When Something Happens but i know thats practically impossible and would never happen bcs What Fucking Psychologist Uses Tumblr All The Time plus theres a lot of backstory n shit that theyd have to learn abt and stuff thats now like Completely Normal to me tht theyd have to get used to especially if they didnt already have like 3 years of experience on this hellsite cuz 99% of the shit we say and do here would get VERY different reactions from normal ppl than what were all accustomed to but since theres literally No Fucking Way this would ever happen even like someone who actually fucking had Literally Any Actual Ideas Or Independent Thought Ever that could actually Help Me and give me Advice rather than just saying either "you need help" "kys" "you need to stop" or just "I Dont Know" cuz NONE OF THOSE HELP ANYBODY!!!!!! and while im on the subject of not fucking helping anybody, if you like hate me or dont like me or whatever Fine disliking me is perfectly justified and understandable and im not fuckin sayin u cant hate me cuz honestly i deserve it but like quit fucking sending me asks that just say "youre abusive" or "You Abuse People" or "youre a shitty person" or anythin like that cuz guess fucking what!!! i know!!!!!! idk what yr tryna achieve by sending me the same shit I Already Know over and over again but like its not gonna help change jack fucking SHIT youre not helping anything and yr certainly not being a useful member of society like if you want me to change so fucking badly dont fucking shit on me for trying to improve myself and become a better person and like Move On With My Life So I Can Slowly Try And Heal Myself Over Time actually fucking HELP ME and TELL ME WHAT YOU EXPECT ME TO DO bcz tryna bring me down while im doing Really Fucking Well is the polar opposite of Good you fucks want me to change right? you hate me you want me to stop etc etc then How About you actually make a god damn effort to help me do what you keep telling me to do over and over again give me Constructive Criticism let me know if im Doing Well give me Methods and Advice on improving myself and dont just fucking try and make me feel like a horrible person for Trying To Get Better