#even merchants don't have enough gold for me to be able to sate your appetite

[invinciblerodent]

Why is Gale eating shoes like The Meme du Jour. You ask nicely to please be able to eat two pairs of shitty boots and an ugly ring in act 1, and you're just forever known as Weirdo Wizard, the Shoe Eater? Nah.

What's ACTUALLY kinda inconvenient is that I do all this hard work of skulking around dank basements, rifling through corpses' pockets for loose change and opening every box, barrel, and vase, hoping to see old parchment, and whenever I actually FIND one, I can feel him licking his lips burning a hole in the back of my head with his gaze.

"That's a nice scroll you found," he says, "You know I could learn that spell, and be able to cast it whenever you need it."

But don't believe his lies. He just eats it like a musty fruit by the foot, and like 250 gold too, and he'll STILL only remember like. Seven or so of his dumb little spells.

We should call him Weirdo Wizard, the Moneysink.