#evbo fucking dies or something like that

[carnivorousarcher]

completely unrelated frames from an animatic that ill never finish so im just gonna leave these here. honestly was considering just posting the last one but the first few are fine too ig

[edible-emerald]

Ok so PVP civilization??? I HAVE SOME THOUGHTS???

Spoilers for episode 5 btw

So first off the REVEALS THIS EPISODE??? And the fact that most of them were to the viewer and not to Evbo???

The first reveal I want to talk about is PRINCEZAM REVIVING. HE CAN REVIVE TOO. This means WAY MORE THAN YOU MIGHT INITIALLY THINK.

Princezam's character, in nature, is selfish. He talks highly about how Evbo repeatedly dying is heroic, and while he may be subjecting himself to endless torture, he's saving so many lives, he's a hero, he's a good person. It's implied that Zam believes, if he were in Evbo's position, he would do the same; that he would let himself die to save others. But it's a lie. Because he IS in Evbo's position. HE CAN REVIVE TOO. But he kept it a better secret than Evbo, which is the only reason why he hasn't been endlessly farmed yet.

The second reveal Princezam gives that also shows more about his character and motives is that Evbo has a limited number of revives. He isn't immortal. He's on his last life. If he dies again, he'd be gone forever. And Zam knew this.

And I think something is really, really interesting about this. Because in episode 4, Zam's motive is to make Evbo die over and over indefinitely so he can keep increasing durability of the iron swords and increasing life span. Still an interesting character, but him KNOWING that this solution is temporary, and him KNOWING that Evbo will die permanently soon, changes everything. His motive wasn't to save the iron swords, I actually think he couldn't care less about them. His motive was to kill Evbo.

What else would it be? Why else would Zam KNOWINGLY make Evbo die over and over with every death coming closer to permanent death? Because for whatever reason, Zam wanted to get rid of Evbo. But why? Yes, it's true he was the chosen one. But that leads me into my next point:

Is he?

The only real thing that made Evbo special enough to be the chosen one is that he could revive himself after dying. But he isn't the only one who can. Zam can too; and I believe Tabi and a few other people can as well. So IS he the chosen one? Personally, I don't think he is. I think that someone else is the chosen one, but I'll get to who eventually. What possible motive could Zam have for wanting Evbo dead, if he isn't the chosen one?

Evbo was a diamond sword.

OKOKOK HEAR ME OUT

Evbo was a diamond sword who's memories were erased. He was threatening to like do something (maybe become a netherite sword?) that Zam and others didn't approve of and maybe he was working with Tabi, so both of them were killed and revived in the wooden sword level. But Evbo's memories were erased in the process so Tabi decided to manipulate him and get to the top without him this time. That brings me to the next point.

Tabi has history with some of the diamond swords. Specifically, Ferre. We don't know what yet, but I believe like I said above that she and Evbo were previously diamond swords, and were trying to do something and ended up being killed. Evbo's memories were erased but Tabi's weren't.

I think the reason the diamond swords were willing to let Evbo back in and not Tabi is because he lost all his memories. Maybe, he'll get some back and realize that the diamond layer is corrupt or evil in some way, and team up with Tabi to defeat them. But I don't think so. I think Tabi is evil and had either roped in Evbo, or worked with Evbo but losing his memories made him change.

Anyways, on the topic of reviving, I think it's also safe to say Zam was a diamond sword. First off, he seemed to know the diamond swords personally and disliked them, calling them 'bottom feeders' (which by the way is so fucking funny I giggled so much at that line) also we know he can revive as well so safe to say he was killed and revived there. Maybe he was in the plan (that may or may not exist idfk) with Tabi and Evbo and was killed as well. But I doubt it, considering how he treats Evbo, but then again, his character is very selfish and antagonistic. I think his ultimate motive is to rank up to a netherite sword (which may be godhood like in parkciv?? but we don't know) and he's trying to kill Evbo to take out the competition.

Also this is a minor thing but now we finally know why Zam kept his door closed in episode two, because he had an armor stand too and didn't want the secret to come out.

Now for the final reveal: Parrot has a backstory. And I think I know what it is.

Parrot is the real chosen one.

Ok my evidence for this is mostly speculation but also if Evbo isn't the chosen one than who?? Parrot is a really odd character, like every time he talks it just feels like there's something off about him. He talks a lot about the chosen one, but he acts. Weird. Around Evbo when he finds out that he's the chosen one. Also, for someone so devoted to the chosen one, he's still very much alive; and I point this out because he has a mansion AND a video journaling machine. That costs a lot of swings and I have a feeling he hasn't really ever paid respects to it. Even though he says he has. And why would he? BECAUSE HE'S THE CHOSEN ONE.

If Parrot isn't the chosen one, either one of two things are probably true:

he was a diamond sword

he was a/the netherite sword

I don't really know how these would work in the story the same way the chosen one theory would, but yeah

Thank you for reading my ramblings :33 hopefully I didn't miss anything lmao

ALSO??? WEMMBU AND MINUTE IN A EVBO VIDEO???? HELLO???? IS THIS REAL LIFE????????

[backwards360]

tell me about your headcanons about the cultural differences between layers plss

- your favourite sister ever

takes a deep deep deep breath. hello niki. my beloved sister. my favoritest sister ever.

the noob layer (before the evil champion)

very very community oriented

block parties (get it) are really popular!!

a lot of sharing and stuff going on

music!! music is a really big thing!!

accent sounds a bit like theyre singing, almost like theyre dancing with words!! they dont pronounce their vowels fully!!

the noob layer (after the evil champion)

community??? no chance, everyone dies before you get to even know their name (which is why evbo never bothers asking anyone)

really the only sharing they do is when someone is sick or theres a child and occasionally family units share food

cannibalism. yeah. its normal for people to go insane, the noobs probably refer to it as some kind of curse or something bc thats fun

the pro layer (before the evil champion)

everyones neighbors!! less community oriented than the noob layer

more focused on helping each other get better!! regularly helping each other learn fun new parkour things

their accent is kinda like. how do i explain this. their voices tend to be softer and tbh i wanna say they sound like a weird mix of southern and british. dont ask questions.

i dont have much for the pro layer if yall have fun things hand 'em over

the pro layer (after the evil champion)

music is HUGE here between moral boosting events and also playing songs for parkour !!

community oriented but more in the way where family units stick together and everyone else is like. a coworker. like you might be friends and occasionally you might get close with someone but like. ehhhhh

mostly just like. yeah i work in the same general area as this guy

the fighter later (before they were banished)

this layer has the most people because its so hard to rank up so its the one with the most stuff going on!!

libraries!! this is the layer of scholars and shit!!

theres so many people here that the masters come down and hang out here a lot too!!

this is where everyone learns things, theres no schools on the other layers because everyone has the chance to rank up !!

this ones just fun, its got a mix of everything because its the most populated \o/

they have a fun accent i think, tbh i wanna say its similar to new york? idk

the fighter layer (after the banishment)

devoid of basically everything that made it what it was

the most sparsely populated now

everyone is hostile as fuck, by the point we see it in canon everything's been combed over tens of hundreds of times so if someone sees someone else its safe to assume one of them is getting mugged

unless its a seawatt situation but whatever

some bonds still remain and theyre as strong as ever now

everyone either has fashioned masks out of their clothes or just has the most fucked up throat from the frequent sandstorms.

the master layer (before the evil champion)

not much going on up here!! they normally hang out on the fighter layer

huuuuuge showoffs but like in a fun way!! performances!!! wow!!!

theyve got a bit of twang in their voice i think bc yes.

the master layer (after the evil champion)

showoffs but in a bad way

big on spreading rumors

really reclusive, never visit lower levels or each other

battling is common for any reason, the more people youve defeated in a battle the higher up you are on the social ladder

ok heres some!! i hope u like it it took me like 45 minutes to write all this bc i kept getting distracted

[saiintvalentiine]

I think I threatened this before, but kenwatt regional polycule in a life series setting? (KWW, parrot, or other UU and parkciv characters at your discretion). Do whatever you please in terms of the gimmick, but I do have a particular love for red life bloodlust :3

i know we've already talked a stupid amount abt this AU so idk what to say here, just that i tried my best :') For everyone else: this is a double life au where the soulmate pairs were randomly determined by a spin wheel. They were: Mapicc + Wifies, Egg + Wemmbu, Ken + Wato, Parrot + Seawatt, and Evbo + Spoke. Enjoy!

Word count: 528

Spoke jerks awake and rolls out of his bed, hitting the floor hard. On the other side of their shitty hut is Evbo, eyes ruby red and wide.

“What happened?” Evbo asks, helping Spoke up.

“That bastard shoved me!” Spoke fumes. “My stuff!”

[SpokeIsHere was doomed to fall by Parrotx2]

[Eggchan]: damn those are our second reds

[Wifies]: lol

[Wifies]: wild day

“We're red now though, which means we can get them back,” Evbo digs through their chests, pulling out dinged pieces of armor and iron swords.

“We have to find Seawatt,” Spoke decides as he armors up. “Parrot has my fuckin’ sword!”

“Seawatt's easier to target,” Evbo agrees. “And I think I know where to find him. He was mining near me before I died, I could hear him.”

The red flushes between them strangely, like a cyclical tide— it wanes in Evbo, but rises in Spoke, pure heat, and then it switches, Evbo becoming twitchier, like a resonance that responds to itself back and forth and back and forth. Spoke keeps turning his sword over and over. Following Evbo feels easy, natural, as they duck into a cave system. It takes a bit of following torches to dead ends, but there's the sound of a pick hitting stone eventually.

Seawatt is none the wiser. His hands are dark with coal dust as he hums. Spoke twirls his sword once and then goes charging.

Seawatt shrieks as Spoke slashes his arm. He pulls his own sword out and blocks his next hit.

“Fucking Parrot,” Seawatt grunts, struggling against Spoke. “Can't he pick fights at a better time?”

Blood dribbles down Seawatt's arm. The smell is metallic, sour, sweet. It fills Spoke’s head with cotton, a sugary desire for more. Each strike sounds like bells, the wedding kind, the kind that promises more, promises something hot and vile and—

A spray of blood all over Spoke's face and chest. Seawatt's head rolls right off his shoulders, eyes wide and cast to the side in his final moments. Evbo is standing there, soaked in Seawatt's blood, rusted iron axe in hand.

[SeawattGaming was slain by Evbo_]

[Wemmbu]: lol

[Wemmbu]: thats hilarious

[Wifies]: oh dear

[Eggchan]: lol

[Eggchan]: our third reds

[Eggchan]: all it took was like three days

[Mapicc]: that was fast

The blood dissolves away, and Seawatt's items split between their inventories, but the bloodlust is still there, still clouds the air like a filthy miasma. Wordlessly, they leave the cave to hunt down Parrot and Seawatt.

Far above, crouching behind the treeline, are two sets of mismatched eyes.

“Looks like they're going to try and finish the job,” Wifies mutters, hand tight around his bow.

“Parrot's down on his luck,” Mapicc stands up and offers a hand. “Evbo is a better fighter than I expected.”

“He's got his moments,” Wifies takes his hand and stands up, letting his leg adjust to the weight. “Should we follow them or try to deal with Egg and Wemmbu first?”

“I'm not too worried about Egg and Wemmbu.”

“Right. This situation seems more. . . explosive. Better make sure they deal with each other while we're still yellow.”

They disappear into the foliage.

[starbound-jupiter]

also also followup on vamp seawatt, avian evbo and uh shapeshifter?? mist creature that can change their form to whatever they want emf hides in my cave once again

OMG. SO LIKE,, WOULD EVERY LEVEL BE A DIFFERENT CREATURE THEN??

love love love the idea of EMF as a shapeshifter- particularly because that implies the super ominous form he takes is a Deliberate Choice 😭😭

and avian evbo immediately has my whole heart!! this does, however- present some questions. is everyone on the noob level an avian? and more importantly, what kind of bird is evbo?

i’m gonna say there’s different variations of avians on the noob level, like- they’re not all the same species, just to add some flair!! and in regards to evbo, just. hear me out okay.

pigeon. pigeon evbo.

first off- i think those wings would be really cute with his general style lol, but there is a deeper reasoning!!

if you’ve talked to me for more than twenty minutes, you’ve probably heard my Pigeon Rant before. i love those babies with all of my heart, and think they’re some of the most horribly misunderstood creatures out there. and like!! the more i think about it, there are a lot of similarities between the treatment of pigeons and the people on the noob level.

they’re viewed as dirty, inherently lesser than- and fucking helpless, relying on our scraps to survive. but here’s the thing. pigeons were domesticated by humans.

when animals are domesticated, they lose their ability to survive on their own. that’s why we’re told to bring injured animals to the vet instead of nursing them back to health ourselves- because most people don’t know how to properly take care of an animal without it becoming reliant on them. and when they put it back into the wild, it just dies.

the noob level is entirely reliant on the upper levels. and this isn’t because they’re too weak or helpless to survive on their own, but rather their means of independent survival are purposely withheld.

and THEN, this fact is used to justify their treatment!! why treat them with dignity, after all- they’re just pests!! they’re disposable- something to be thrown away the second they’re not useful. cough cough the prison testing courses

so yeah!! i’d say that our society’s inherent cruelty to pigeons is a fucking heartbreaking metaphor for pkciv. therefore, pigeon evbo.

(also if someone draws this i will love you forever)

[redbo-and-simbo]

Neither did we until recently. It’s just that once we figure something out, the information spreads quickly and we decide to push boundaries. Anons and viewers are just curious like that. There’s some of the common magics, such as of summoning items and occasionally causing things to happen, along with other things I’m not going to mention… (don’t trust those rats). You perform, we observe. And in some cases, we move the plot along.

But this place is strangely malleable yet rigid. And I swore I wouldn’t fuck with your mind until all this died down, especially since the other anons got so aggressive but it must be asked. How did you even make all this? How did we get here? You’ve said that the creator left you but then how did you do this?? Creating this space is impressive enough but not only have you built all these machines and simulations and got all these clones, you also populated this facility with others. Seawatt has his own creator but you have a Seawatt here. How. If the others are simulations, then what is this?

-🔹

A lot of questions. I will say, I've always respected your curiosity, Viewer.

For most of that, I'll just say I have my methods, and I'm not too keen on sharing them. However, as for what this place is, I'd say it's..roughly similar to a simulation. It's more abstract than that but..none of this, in a sense, is real.

It's simply one big machine for me to observe scenarios, find the most ideal Evbos, and then one day, when my work is done, I intend to leave it all behind. Delete it all. None of it will matter by that point, anyway.

[parkcivconfess]

stuck with a flat tire so here's some angst while I wait to be rescued

Evbo doesn't know how to mourn. After the hundredth time watching another person - one he would call a friend if he didn't know better than to get attached - fall into the Void, he just feels...numb.

Death is not only inevitable, but an expected constant. Every time he speaks to someone he's just wondering when they'll slip. Every conversation, interaction, Evbo hoards them all like they're his last. He doesn't know how to grieve because he's never stopped grieving. He's numb and hurting all at once and he never learned how to deal with that, how to compartmentalise the emotions properly.

He's so honest to people because he believes they'll die soon. (He believes he'll die soon.) No need for secrets when the one holding them is marching forth to their unmoving demise, one jump at a time. It'll happen. He knows this. This is the only constant in Evbo's life; even the pros sometimes skip feeding them all.

And then he ranks up. And no one is poised like they're going to die. They make the jumps with confidence and a kind of ease that starvation would always rob you of. There's worry there, yes, people are careful with their jumps, but not the resigned acceptance that they will die.

And then he ranks up again. These Masters are so callous with their lives, making nigh impossible jumps for fun or power or status. Toying with death by the mere act of getting into their house. Water buckets everywhere. Evbo doesn't leave his house for his first week on the layer because for once he has something to live for and he can't die so close to the top.

After everything, he's led by the nose to the destruction of Parkour Civilization by someone who had betrayed him. And then Seawatt dies. And Evbo still doesn't know how to mourn. There isn't time.

He runs off, leaps into the Void, the entire journey is a blur of jumps and jumps and more jumps and by the end he's God and his shoulder aches and his feet sting and everyone is still dead, but there's no time to linger on that. He has to get his Ally and EMF out of the Fighter Layer first, has to start rebuilding and repairing the world around him before he can focus on himself, and-

It's been three months and Evbo has not shed one tear since the day Seawatt died. But every emergency has been resolved. All the urgent things are complete. He has to linger. He has to grieve.

Evbo still does not know how to mourn. He does not sob as tears roll down his cheeks, and he just feels empty.

- 👢 Anon :]

PUNCHES THD AIR OJ MY GODDDD THIS IS MY FALLING TOWER OF PIZA FUCK

im so abnormal ABOUT THIS