#eidxlism

[king-ilias]

A memory they want to forget

𝑨𝑺𝑲 𝑴𝑬𝑴𝑬; memories * //  ACCEPTING !!  ( also, received this specific prompt from multiple people, so... )

December 21, 496 AD.  Castle Stroheim in Makati.

In the moments before daybreak, when all the world is painted a soft blue, Ilias floated somewhere between this world and the next. Sleep was like a little death -- a brief, scraping respite from the world, where pain and agony were mercifully suspended. Dreams were so oft intertwined with a thin-veiled reality, where celestial beings and spirits did linger in the shadows to beseech his slumbering aid. Most simply sought guidance, lost on their way to Osiris, while some struggled to understand their fateful end. Their transcendence. They slipped into the background of his sleepscape, wandering in a haze, caught somewhere between unalive and undead. 

Waking bordered on abandonment, for which he often rose dripping guilt. But this morning, as eyelids fluttered open and light blurred vision, Ilias felt the heaviness of a shadow cast across his face. Above him, expressionless in his matching gaze, leaned Lothar. In the fuzziness of first consciousness, Ilias said nothing, meeting silence with itself as they looked both at and beyond the other. It was a puzzling sight -- for his presence, his calm, and his visage. King Lothar’s health had begun rapidly declining after Sabine’s disappearance, citing heartbreak and grief. Yet Ilias had never seen sickness ravage the body like it did his. No healer had been able to diagnose him, nor stop or slow the spread, and so Ilias and Eliana had watched their father wither, curl into himself, and rot.

Yet here Lothar stood, examining his son with tempered displeasure, cheeks full and eyes risen from their sunken state. He appeared old, perhaps worn, but not unwell. 

“Father?” Ilias knitted his brows, gaining clarity in consciousness. 

Lothar matched his expression, head tilting with unfocused confusion. Something in his face emerged bitter and familiar. 

“You are so wholly undeserving,” he measured, tone even and unfeeling. “It will be wasted on you, as my name was. As my crown will be.”

Ilias pressed his palms into the bed, pushing himself up to meet his father’s eyes with a leveled coldness of his own. Jaw tense, he sucked his tongue and his teeth to contain retaliation or retort. Whether or not Lothar recognized hatred in Ilias’ eyes, he appeared undisturbed by its presence, turning toward the corridor to take his leave. At the doorframe, from over one shoulder, Lothar humbled himself enough to appear remorseful, though never without sharp edge. 

“It is the one thing I will never forgive her for.”

Ilias froze, color draining as his heartbeat slammed against his chest. With venom, he lunged from the bed, clawing back linen as he lurched after Lothar, who had turned the corner out of view. 

“Speak of her, and I will send you to meet her once mo--” he froze in the hallway, chest heaving. With trembling hand, he wiped spit from his mouth and turned on his heel. The corridor was empty. No footsteps clicked in the distance, and nothing appeared disturbed in their wake. He was alone.

--

Ilias’ own steps seemed to echo off the walls as he quickened his pace toward the King’s chambers. In the years to come, he would look back upon this moment and reckon with the complexity of denial - of the presence of hope and fear as he pressed open the doors and slipped within the shadows. Perhaps that was why he did not react to seeing Lothar above his bed that morning, despite his altered visage. Perhaps that was why only the invocation of Sabine’s memory jolted him awake. And while there was no consequence to admitting a level of knowing in that moment, especially so long after, Ilias could not bring himself to believe that Lothar loathed him so fully in death as he did in life.

Yet there, lying in bed the way Ilias had been in his own moments prior, was Lothar: propped up against a spread of pillows with his head turned slightly toward the door -- almost expectantly. But Ilias faltered at the sight, face becoming slack, vision blurring as he leaned back against the doorframe.

Lothar’s eyes had sunken into his skull, and the expanse of his flesh was bloated and purple. In some parts, his skin tore and caved in on itself, exposing bone and muscle beneath. Gaunt and motionless, Lothar’s corpse bordered on skeletal, as though he had decayed overnight. 

“Osiris,” Ilias exhaled, steadying himself back onto two feet. He approached his father’s bedside, lips pressing tightly in morbid reverence, inching closer until he leaned over the rotting body the way Lothar had watched Ilias sleep. Something like relief bubbled at the back of his throat, burning like shameful bile. He swallowed it down, hovering his opened palm over Lothar’s putrescent face. 

“Mortem non timeo,” he blessed. “It is the end of this journey.” As there could be no response from Lothar, Ilias finished for him. His last act of kindness as son. His first act of mercy as King.

“May you go to it gladly.”

[screamteen-blog]

Thanks for following, I'm Stella. How are you

[dr4copl4t3-blog]

eidxlism liked your post:T4LK TO M3!!!!!!!!!!!!!

*ST4R3S 4T YOU*

[skyphile]

eidxlism replied to your post: “[ iM LIST E NING TO THE MEME PLAY LIST AND MY SISTER KEEPS DRAGGING...”:

(( me last night tbh.. i SURVIVED the WHOLE THING ))

she was about to threaten me to stop but then i told her: THE HOBBITS TO ISENGARD AND BREADFISH ARE HERE, and she consented ]

[king-ilias]

✿

— relationship meme.

FRIENDSHIP.     childhood friends  /  work buddies or coworkers  /  family friends  /  friends with benefits  /  smoking buddies  /  adventure buddies  /  fake friends  /  recently friends  /  party buddies  /  friendship of need  /  dying friendship  /  circumstantial friendship  /  partners in crime  /  old friendship  /  [ your muse ] is the good influence  /  [ your muse ] is the bad influence  /  [ my muse ] is the good influence  /  [ my muse ] is the bad influence  /  opposites attract  /  ride or die  /  frenemies  /  roommates or flatmates  /  penpals  /  exes to friends  /  enemies to friends  /  other .

FAMILIAL.     siblings [ full ]  /  siblings [ half ]  /  siblings [ step ]  /  [ my muse ] is an older sibling figure to your younger sibling figure  /  [ my muse ] is a younger sibling figure to your older sibling figure muse  /  [ my muse ] is a parental figure to yours  /  [ my muse ] is a child figure to your muse  /  guardian figure  /  legal guardian  /  adoptive child  /  foster child  /  [ your muse ] is taken under mines wing  /  [ my muse ] is taken under yours wing  /  other .

ANTAGONISTIC.     dangerous to each other  /  dangerous to others  /  unpredictable  /  rivals  /  petty  /  developing into sexual or romantic tension  /  based off family matters  /  based of off circumstance  /  based of professional matters  /  based off misunderstanding or lies  /  conflict of ideology  /  betrayal  /  hero - villain dynamic  /  enemies  /  fight club  /  friends turned enemies  /  lovers turned enemies  /  exes turned enemies  /  other .

[king-ilias]

𝕚𝕝𝕚𝕒𝕤 𝕒𝕟𝕕 𝕖𝕝𝕚𝕒𝕟𝕒 + 𝖈𝖍𝖎𝖑𝖉𝖗𝖊𝖓 𝖔𝖋 𝖉𝖊𝖆𝖙𝖍

"we fall from womb to tomb, from one blackness and toward another, remembering little of the one and knowing nothing of the other ... except through faith." -- stephen king

featuring @eidxlism

[king-ilias]

𝖕𝖗𝖔𝖘𝖕𝖊𝖗𝖆 + 𝕥𝕒𝕣𝕠𝕥

Three of Swords (Crown Princess Eliana of Neriak)         ↬ featuring @eidxlism

The Three of Swords depicts the message of rejection, betrayal, hurt and discouragement. In moments like these, we are well served by the mind. If you can think logically about it and prepare for the experience, the impact of this pain may be minimized. But remember too, that pain and grief are a normal part of life, because they make us appreciate what joy and happiness we have, and they teach us for the future. It is through pain that we learn to be avoid mistakes that could lead us into danger and grief. Sometimes life gives us no choice - we are knocked down. But what determines one's future is the choice of whether to remain knocked down, or rise again. While the grief may be extreme, it enables you to forget your past and focus on your future, knowing that you have control of what actions you take afterwards. Don’t dwell so much on what is troubling you, but instead focus on what is approaching. You determine your fate.