#editing this today showed me I'm a better writer and editor than I was in November when I first wrote it

[kris-mage-fics]

The Secret of the Greenhouse

A little non canon compliant Tabitha fic for Scarlet Hollow.

Tabitha loathes taking care of the…thing in the greenhouse. But with Pearlanne gone she's the only one left to do it.

(Please note: I wrote this before Episode 4 came out and based it on my thoughts on the Goop Teddy fan theory at the time. Now we know what's actually in the greenhouse, so this very much doesn't follow canon. But after @georgiedoesntfloat asked me about my SH fic ideas I couldn't get this one out of my head because I liked the vibes. So here it is, and it's all thanks to Georgie!)

Tabitha wasn’t one to believe something unless she saw it herself. She lived in a world of what was concrete and right in front of her. Yet what was in front of her tested her mightily. It shouldn’t exist, but somehow it did. Now that Pearlanne was gone, it was up to her to deal with this…thing.

Pearlanne told Tabitha about it less than a year ago. Apparently it used to be Teddy Scarlet, who was said to have died in the mine collapse in 1918. For all she knew that was a lie. But she learned long ago to keep such thoughts to herself. Pearlanne had been insistent that she learn how to ‘care’ for it. As if it were some kind of horrible pet.

Ever the dutiful daughter, she listened to what her mother had to say. Though Tabitha was sure Pearlanne left out quite a bit. There were too many missing pieces to the story she was given. Now she would never know the rest. Her mother was dead, and she knew not to trust what it had to say.

You can find the rest here on Ao3!

[mayasdeluca]

It’s looking to me like Danielle and Stefania have to be part of why we didn’t get intimacy between marina this past season. Look at what’s being done in the same time slot with greys. The comparisons will continue and it will just make things look worse.

I don't know why this is the conclusion people jumped to immediately but I saw it all over Twitter today and a bunch of people have already said why that's clearly not the case. I'm more likely to believe it's the other factors that were the cause like having a showrunner who thought it was more pivotal to the story to show two men having sex at a funeral twice and didn't think it was necessary to show the two married women share a kiss while out on a date at a bar so editing the scene to start right after the kiss was something we shouldn't have been mad about. Or one of their main editors/directors having the mind of a 12 year old boy and making one of their 'intimate' scenes a perverted transition and then proceeding to weirdly cut the second part of their intimate scene because it was more important to have a better transition for the straight couple in the next scene. Or because most of the writers room started treating Ross and Sullivan like the fictional Brad and Angelina thinking they needed to have every romantic cliche that ever existed and not caring what kind of double standards it created when it came to their longest lasting couple, the wlw couple on their show.

The worst part is that some of these people in the writers room even tried to excuse/defend it as actor's comfortability throughout the seasons just to rid themselves of any blame but it becomes more and more clear Danielle and Stefania were always comfortable with one another, expressed how many hours they spent created intimate and romantic scenes only for them to be cut or messed with. They deserved better and so did we. It will be interesting to see what continues to be shown in the 10pm time slot for a wlw couple on another show but then again...we already know it was all excuses. They had the nerve to use the time slot as a way to promote how the season will be hotter and sexier than ever and use Marina to do it only to then manipulate their scenes and make it so that they got the least intimacy and sexiness compared to the other couples. It was a gross tactic and happens way too often specifically with wlw couples and it needs to stop.

[russburlingame]

9 Years.

Apparently, yesterday was my 9-year Tumblr anniversary. I only noticed because, my sheer coincidence, I logged in to post today. Happy birthday!

Last week, I released the first new episode of the Emerald City Video Podcast in a long while. Zach Roberts and I have actually recorded a few that never made their way to the internet, since it takes an act of God to make me actually do any editing. I’ll be working on that.

For anyone who hasn’t listened to it before, the Emerald City Video Podcast is named after a video store (which no longer exists) in Syracuse, New York. I worked there in college, and loved it. There, I learned to love movies I never would otherwise have given a chance, and also fell in love with the idea of collecting movie props. We had them everywhere, and I came to realize how cool it is to have an actual, tangible piece of something you love. I have worked on this podcast for more than 7 years, primarily with Zach but occasionally with other guest hosts who worked at Emerald City or other video stores.

You can listen to the new episode here, which is a review of John Wick Chapter 4. It’s a “New Release Wall” episode, which is video store speak for “we went to the movies and recorded our reaction in the car after.” We’re fancy, I know. I didn’t send this episode out as an email blast, because we have another episode coming this week, which I think is a much, much better introduction to ECV for anybody who is just finding us on Substack now, where I'm putting the show so I don't have to pay for hosting.

What have I been up to?

Earlier this month (as I alluded to in my introductory post), I finished the crowdfunding campaign for Time To Be Heroes, my second full book. It’s an oral history of DC’s Legends of Tomorrow, featuring interviews with the cast and crew. A lot of what I expect to be posting to Substack will be behind-the-scenes goodness from creating that book, as well as a little ebook companion that I’m planning on putting together that features conversations with comic book creators, fan fiction writers, and other folks who are a big part of the Legends community but likely will not feature prominently in an oral history of the show itself.

I will also be sharing some other side projects. For over a decade now, I have been doing a “director’s commentary”-style column for each issue of Savage Dragon. It has followed me between three different websites, and the first two no longer host any of the old content. So I have a book coming out soon that will collect the first 24 issues of my commentaries, with new introductions to each by Savage Dragon superfan and editor Gavin Higginbotham.

I have had great success with my first two books on crowdfunding platforms, and am currently trying to decide whether to launch a campaign for this — it’s almost completely finished, and my only real expenses will be layout and printing — or just sell it on my online store. It seems the ticking clock of crowdfunding really serves as an incentive to folks, but it feels strange to do another crowdfunding campaign so soon after the Legends one.

My first book, an oral history of the 2001 movie Josie and the Pussycats, is something I’m still very proud of, and it made enough money that I was able to publish The Gold Exchange, a collection of old interviews and columns that serves as an unoffiical companion to Booster Gold comics from 2006 until 2022. The Josie book, The Gold Exchange, and some other stuff is available at JosieBook.com, and Time To Be Heroes will be available in February of next year.

Anyway, that feels like enough for now. I do have some big stuff I want to yell into the void about soon. But…not tonight. Soon.

[yourmandevine]

And in case I don't see you: Good afternoon, good evening, and goodnight (or: some personal news)

No sense burying the lede:

One month shy of four years after joining up, and with something like 570 columns, features, blog posts, and blurbs in the rear-view, today's my last day at The Ringer. Barring some unforeseen Friday afternoon news, my final piece will have been about the Knicks' best-laid plans not quite panning out the way they intended. Let it never be said that the basketball content gods don't have a sense of humor.

I'm grateful to have spent four years sharing a masthead with some of the best writers on the Internet, and to have carved out a niche on what I've felt was, pound-for-pound, the best NBA team in the business. I'm grateful I got to co-host a podcast with two great friends for a while, to everyone who took the time to listen to it, and to everyone who said (and still says!) nice things about it. I'm grateful to have gotten the chance to be part of the Ringer Union, and to have played a small role in trying to make a company I loved a little more fair and equitable.

I'm grateful to have gotten the opportunity to grow and develop as both a writer and analyst. I feel like I'm better at this job than I used to be, thanks in no small part to the freedom and support I've enjoyed. I'm grateful to everyone, past and present, who has made The Ringer the sort of place where someone like me could level up.

I'll still be writing about the NBA on the Internet. (And talking about it into a microphone again, too.) I'll say more about that soon. Right now, the only thing I want to say is: thank you.

Specifically, I want to thank some of the many people whose names never showed up on the things I published, but who were indispensable to every one of them—and, beyond that, to so much more of what The Ringer makes. As much as this company is about the on-air personalities on your favorite podcasts, it's also about the literal scores of people who bust their asses every day to try to make sure we're making the best stuff we can.

It takes a lot of people to make us look good. Here are the names of the ones who helped me.

MY EDITORS

Nobody edited me more often than Matt Dollinger, Justin Verrier, or Chris Almeida—three very different dudes, but all patient, professional, and kind, despite the sheer tonnage of words I dropped on their heads. Many thanks also to culture czar Andrew Gruttadaro (without whom the Stevie Nicks' Fajita Roundup and Pete & Pete pieces wouldn't have happened), Aric Jenkins, Ben Glicksman, Chris Ryan, Danny Chau, Donnie Kwak, Justin Sayles, Mallory Rubin, Megan Schuster, and Riley McAtee for pinch-hitting over the years. I'm sorry I never once hit a word count. I hope it all still hung together OK.

THE COPY DESK

I can't stress enough how comforting it has been to know that everything I write will pass through the hands of copy chief Craig Gaines and his crack team of copy editors and fact-checkers. It never ceased to amaze me that they would routinely and graciously take thousands of words about, I dunno, the Pelicans defense, and treat it like it mattered, and make sure I didn't sound dumb (or, at least, any dumber than usual).

Mil gracias to: Abou Kamara, Amaar Burton, Analis Bailey, Charlotte Goddu, Chris Grismer, Damian Burchardt, Dan Comer, Daniel Chin, Isaac Levy-Rubinett, Iza Wojciechowska, Jack McCluskey, Jacqueline Kantor, Jordan Ligons, Julianna Ress, Julie Kliegman, Kellen Becoats, Kjerstin Johnson, Lex Pryor, and—last alphabetically in this group, but certainly not least—Shaker Samman.

THE ART DEPARTMENT

One of the fringe benefits of working here has been knowing that, when my post is ready to go up, I'm going to get to see whatever rad thing David Shoemaker and his team have crafted to put up at the top of it. (Pro tip: If you write a long enough thing to get the feature build, they give it the bigger and wider art, which looks even friggin' cooler, IMO.) It's a true delight to know that, even if the words aren't all that good, the pictures will be. Thanks to David, Alycea Tinoyan, Matt James, Neil Francisco, and Jonathan Bartlett for making sure that's true.

THE SOCIAL MEDIA TEAM

I know, this sounds crazy, but apparently it's not always easy to get audience members excited to read a bunch of words about, like, the Spurs' bench? And yet, the perennially underappreciated and over-yelled-at-on-the-Internet social team never stopped working to find ways to do it. Shouts out to Alex Stamas, Amelia Wedemeyer, Bridget Geerlings, David Lara III, Jomi Adeniran, Julie Phayer, Keith Fujimoto, Kiera Givens, Logan Rhoades, Nicole Bae, Pat Muldowney, and Rubie Edmondson for tirelessly running up that hill.

AUDIO/VIDEO

Isaac Lee and Steve Ahlman produced Heat Check, and they were absolutely wonderful to work with every single week. So were Bobby Wagner and Jim Cunningham when they got spot starts with me, Gonz, and Haley. Isaiah Blakeley, Jessie Lopez, Jonathan Kermah, and Sasha Ashall were always great when I popped up on other shows, too.

Jason Concepcion and Jason Gallagher put me on NBA Desktop twice, including once when they encouraged me to say the phrase "step your pen game up, you word-broke motherfuckers," which stands as one of the proudest moments of my career.

I didn't do much other video stuff here, but when I did, I greatly enjoyed working with, learning from, and joking around with Cory McConnell, Dylan Berkey, J. Kyle Mann, Jackson Safon, Mose Bergmann, Richie Bozek, Ronak Nair, and Sean Yoo. (I haven't yet crossed paths with Aleya Zenieris, Chia Hao Tat, or Donnie Beacham, but they're getting thanked, too. It's a thank-o-rama.)

And, one last thanks:

ALL OF YOU

I'm not sure what I've done to deserve the kind, considerate, passionate, and conscientious readers and followers I've accumulated over the years. All I can do is promise to try to keep doing it, and to try to reward your time and attention a few times a week.

Thanks for sticking around. See you again soon.

[the-writers-bookshelf]

Hey Aubrey, happy FabFriday :-p

What about "The hushing", do you want to share news with us? I'm just tooooo curious...

Now for the question: I've become aware of a pattern in my writing over the last few months. And when I read your October 3rd post "stop being a perfectionist" it hit me like a punch, I felt so caught. That's exactly what's been driving me. I write regularly, circa 3/4 of all days, and for all stories it's the last 5-10% (sometimes just a few sentences) that keep me from publishing. I have the whole story fleshed out in my head, but instead of writing it down, I check the wording of the previous sentences a thousand times. In addition, there's the fine line between enthusiasm to finally be able to share the story and sadness because I don't want to release my baby at all, to give it away. Maybe I'm getting in my own way...?

Thoughts? Please do tell. <3

Sooooooo.... 👀 The Hushing has been published with the caveat that the last few chapters are still with my proofreader. But any typos can be updated whenever and I expect those few chapters to be in my hand this weekend. Then I'll be jumping into marketing with both feet next week and that's when I plan to officially announce that it's live! :)

I put off publishing for SO long because I was massively anxious about getting it out there (like repeatedly waking up in the middle of the night with stomach pain due to so much anxiety).

So I told myself I couldn't put it off any longer and I just had to do it!

It's also a tad shorter than I'd wanted it to be. But I'm chalking it up to a learning experience and I'll work on a longer tale next time around! :)

It's live on Amazon here! (But seriously, I will totally send you a free copy if you're interested! ;)

Absolutely TOTALLY understand being a perfectionist and it's a TOUGH habit to break sometimes! Ultimately, it will take recognizing the root of your stumbling block and finding ways to cope with it and get past it the best you can.

For me, my perfectionism came from the fact that I've had some editors (and readers) give condescending comments when they find a mistake, as if I should know better than to make a typo. Or my pacing was too slow (in their opinion), and they got really nasty about it (an editor literally told me, "Yes, we KNOW already! Get on with it!" which, btw, is highly unprofessional).

So I came to associate mistakes with shame and feeling incompetent, rather than a simple thing to fix. That led me to be preoccupied with my mistakes rather than telling the story and it slowed me waaay down. I felt like I couldn't share my work with anyone until it was spit-polished a thousand times in case someone saw a mistake and scoffed that I called myself a writer.

When you mentioned that you don't want to give your baby away, it sounds like you might have 50/50 feelings about sharing your work. You like showing your work to the world because you get feedback, you get readers, etc. which is what every writer wants!

But once it's out there...do you feel like it's not *yours* anymore? Or do you worry about negative feedback ruining your enthusiasm for the story? Or is something else about it getting under your skin?

For rechecking your work repeatedly, that sounds like something you will have to talk yourself through. Like pep talk yourself, "I've done the best I can on what I've written so far and I will continue to write new progress today."

You could try freewriting - just word dumping into a doc or on real paper - the scene(s) you want to write next. That might get you warmed up and ready to jump into your writing rather than stuck in editing mode.

You can set a timer for your editing mode. Then you have to switch over to writing mode.

You could dedicate certain days to editing while other days are for writing. Sometimes, you just might be in editing mode and that's okay! :)

You could set publishing deadlines for yourself to use as goals. That way, you don't spend a lot of time on editing and you're forced to make progress instead. This depends on you and your process though! Sometimes, deadlines can make people freeze, but it can motivate others.

You might also want to have a project or two that you DON'T share with the public if it's causing you stress. Sometimes, writing for the public eye can make us write a certain way that puts pressure on us. But when we write for ourselves, we feel more liberated and we can say whatever we want.

Whoa that was a long response! But I hope some of that helps!! ♥

I really like Craig Martelle's Youtube series: Author Five Minute Focus. He's the brains behind 20booksto50k which is all about making a living at writing, so a lot of his tips are marketing heavy. But you can skip those. He's loaded with priceless gems about cultivating a strong author mindset!

I've found a number of his videos talk about perfectionism and how it slows you down. It really helps to hear from an author who has written LOADS of books say that mistakes are not the end of the world. Just take a deep breath and tell a good story :)

Whoa that was a long response! But I hope some of that helps!! ♥

[echo-three-one]

Good Day!

As I told earlier, I finished my Soap x Reader Fic and yeah here it is.

I suck at titles and that shows.

Midnight Coffee Rush

John MacTavish x Female Reader

Warnings : Smut. Read at your own Risk or whatever.

Cross-posting to AO3 later 😳

THUD!

You softly slam your head on the desk as you stare blankly at the blinking cursor on your laptop. An article is due next week and you haven't really started on anything yet. Your editor keeps on calling you earlier today on how she can't work on last minute submissions. You assured her that yours won't need that much editing and she trusts you with that, but still, a deadlines a deadline.

Scanning your empty apartment room for ideas, you decide it's best if you take this ordeal outside and look for open places to work on. Coincidentally, the local café "John's brew" happens to open for 24 hours starting today. You feel uneasy at the name of the shop but that won't stop you from your goals today.

After a chilly midnight walk across the streets of your city, you finally make it to the shop, it looks like it can compete with the local Starbucks as its outer layout gives off the same vibe.

You push open the glass doors and the bell chimes from above you, this made the barista at the counter turn his head and greet you with a friendly smile. "Welcome to John's Brew!"

You stand just across the counter as you look up to view what the store has to offer while the barista waits patiently for your order. You order some fancy named coffee, wanting to try out why it has a star next to it's name as the barista, who now you know goes by the name "Gary" based on his name tag, explains that it's their best selling and unique blend coffee. He then passionately tells you how the coffee you chose is created by the owner of the shop and judging by the tone of his voice, he's excited for you to try it for the first time.

"Thanks Gary, here's my card." you reach out for your card and he cheerfully accepts it.

"What name should this go by, Ms. L/N?" he asks readying his marker.

"Just Y/N." you say. Gary raises his eyebrows in confusion.

"Sorry, I'm sure I heard that name somewhere." he dismisses his thoughts and writes your name on the cup.

"We'll you're a barista, I'm sure you've heard a lot of names in your line of work." you jokingly reply. It made him laugh as he gives your card back and you make your way to the corner of the room.

The music is soothing and the ambience is more than enough to keep you going, you pull out your laptop as you start typing ideas for your article.

Gary took the liberty of delivering you your drink saying "You looked very focused" and "There isn't that much customers anyway" and you smiled at the service he's done. He stays for a while insisting that he wants to witness your initial reaction as soon as you taste the coffee. So you slowly blow off the heat and took your first sip.

Your eyebrows raised and your cheeks blushed as the warm beverage tickles your tastebuds a wave of nostalgia brings shivers down your spine.

***

"So, what do you think of this?" A shirtless man with a signature mohawk and scar on his left eye approaches you just as you get up of bed. You remember smiling at the view, his deep blue eyes pierce through yours as he excitedly offers a cup of coffee he claims to mix himself.

"Mmm! This tastes, well... something even I can't describe! It's good? delicious? heavenly maybe?" You giggle as he inches closer to you crawling up the bed and reaching on your face for a kiss, blindly reaching for the cup and putting in on the bedside table.

"Not even the words from your thesaurus can't describe?" He whispers as he pulls the kiss away, eyebrows wiggling. Your heart melts at the sight of him.

"I'll tell you the perfect word when I find it." You giggle as you reach for his face and pull him to yours, as he softly crashes his body on you, rolling around the bed.

***

"Maam?" Gary taps your shoulder and you immediately flinch and turn to him.

"I'm sorry." you laugh nervously.

"It felt like you had a good time going on with that drink. We're having a contest as to which word best describes it. If you want to submit your word, I'll leave this pen and sticky note on your table." he cheerfully explains as the door chimes, making him rush back to his counter.

Shit. You thought to yourself. Of course it had to taste the same, even the name of the shop checks out. Your heart starts to thump louder and louder as you put the pieces together, you convince yourself it's just the coffee, but then again the evidences never lie. John's Brew, that exact taste, no word yet to describe it.

You flinched as you turn to the heavy door slam to your left, just by the counter. A man, walks out of it wearing a very fit long sleeve tucked into business pants, you assume it's the manager. Then again, you see him scratching his head, which happens to have a rather unique haircut. A mohawk. Holy Shit.

***

'Congratulations Ms. Y/N L/N! You have been accepted on the writer program. Please report tomorrow for your orientation.'

The text read just as you wake up. Your face lit up in excitement as you squealed like a kid. Your life would change for the better.

A very wet John MacTavish popped out of the bathroom, his face was full of worry as he quickly wrapped himself with a towel.

"What's wrong?! Something out to get ya?" He asked, a bar of soap on is arms ready to throw to the intruder.

"I just got accepted!" you squealed excitedly at him, hugged him thight not minding how wet he was. He slowly wrapped his arms around you and you felt that you're the only one excited about this news.

"Congrats. But what about your life here? What about me?" he muttered, his facial expressions dropped.

"I'm sure we'll work it out? It isn't that far, right?"

"I'm sure we'll work it out"

"Not now John, I have articles due."

"I'm too exhausted for today, John"

"I'm sorry. I fell asleep."

***

The loud growl of your stomach shocked you back to reality. Come to think of it, it's already 2 in the morning and you're almost through with your article. A muffin won't be that much of a distraction. You turn to the counter and see John catering to a lady on a bright red dress. She probably came from a club and now trying to sober up with a coffee. You pretend to type on your keyboard but secretly view the event from the corner of your eye. They are laughing and he escorted her as she is walking tipsily to the sofa. They exchange some words you barely make out and can't help but feel rage bubbling inside you. But then again, you don't have the slightest audacity to do so. You slowly ignored him while focusing on your job. You left his messages on read and calls on voicemail. You feel guilt rushing through you. Out of impulsive emotions, you quickly decide to finish the article home as you grab your laptop and coffee and rush to the exit.

"Ma'am! You left your sticky note." John's voice echoes across the shop. This made the few notable customers look at the both of us in curiosity.

You slowly turn back to him leaning on the counter, his elbows resting on the counter looking at you, he knows what he's up to. You remember telling him to stop flexing his biceps in front of you in public. It's kind of an inside joke for the two of you and he seems to remember it all too well.

"Your word. For the contest." he points out to the bulletin board of sticky notes on the other side of the hall.

"I... can't think of anything yet..." you stammer as you exit the door, walking as fast as you can away from him.

"Y/N, wait!" he quickly grabs your arm. You almost expect that he'd do this even after all those times.

"John I-" you quicky turn to him, hot tears start forming on your eyes as he pulls you close to his warm embrace.

"Yeah. You've been very busy... I know." He mutters as you sniffle on his chest, smelling his musk that never changed even after all these months.

"Congratulations on your most recent award, you know. Article of the month, and the month before that and that one time you wrote about the wildlife in Africa..." he trails off while rubbing your back as more tears fell from your eyes. He'd been watching your career grow, even after all this time. It somehow feels you don't deserve him. And you believe you really don't.

Pulling away, you looked at him with a smile.

"I'm sorry..." you croak.

"Why are you sorry, Y/N? You met someone else out there?" he asks. Then again, you both didn't really have a proper conclusion to your relationship. You initially felt like you were slowly drifting away from each other as your careers grew, but here he is, having the same sparkle in his eyes as when you last saw each other.

"No... but, it's been very long and I have been ignoring you... breaking my promi-" He suddenly pulls you close and kisses your lips, you deny him at first but you slowly grip his arms and let him have access to your mouth.

Longing is the only feeling you both feel right now as you slowly kiss back and respond to his mouth. His kiss gives you assurance that even after all this time he yearns for you to come back, his assurance that you did what you had to do to get where you are now even at the cost of completely shutting him out. But of course you weren't, you also long for him every single day, but life has to keep going, and you believed that he'd found someone else after all those times. But this moment made you feel wrong about him, and it's now your chance to get things right between the two of you.

"You know, I always assumed you're still my girlfriend." he smirks. He is true though, there was neither a formal nor informal break up effort on both sides, just indifference due to many reasons.

"Well, I assumed you looked for someone else... and I'm to shy to ask how things have been..." you croak, trying not to cry again. You realize your stupidity once more, but he wipes off your tear with his thumb and lifts your chin up to look at him.

"You still owe me a word, you know." he jokes as he walks you back to the cafe, arm wrapped around your shoulder. As soon as you both enter the door, Gary greets his boss while mopping the floor.

"You were right boss, she is pretty!" The barista smiles and gives John a thumbs up to which he replies,

"Guess I'll be back in my office doing paperwork, Gary. You take charge here okay?"

"Yes, Captain!" he jokingly salutes and continues his work.

"You done with that article?" he asks, a tone of concern in his voice.

"Almost.." you reply shyly. You still can't digest everything that happened so far, but your heart keeps on thumping and your mind's been trying to scream something to you.

"You know, I could use some company while I do some paperwork..." the trails off, the tone in his voice shifted into something you felt excited about. Something along those words mixed with that accent sends flutters across your insides.

"If you'd want me to..." you reply as he opens his office door letting you in. It was a small office a sofa just beside the door, two chairs infront of a large office desk filled with scattered papers, ledgers and journals. He quickly folds his laptop and puts it in his bag as you take off your coat, admiring the view. Plaques, certificates and awards plaster across the walls, along with pictures of his staff calendar schedules and some other things scribbled across the whiteboard. He offers his hand and you give him your coat, only to be pinned to the door.

"God, I missed you so fucking much." He breathes as you stare at his cold blue eyes blazing with desire, you know full well where this is going and you have no objections. You wished for this to happen as soon as your plane touched the city.

Unable to form any words, you quickly pucker your lips, signaling him to move closer and kiss you. Now that you're both alone, his kisses felt much more intimate, needier and his tongue explored every possible area he could. You hear the door lock itself and his hand slowly caresses your ass through the tight jeans you're wearing, pressing himself so you could feel the tension growing beneath his slacks. You slowly slide your hand through it and earned yourself a chuckle from him, as he moves his lips below your ear and around your neck, hearing each smack of his lip and sniff of his nose.

You let out a soft moan as you feel overwhelmed on what he does to your body, you couldn't focus on what's going on, your hands rubbing his hard crotch, his hands softly caressing your ass or his mouth doing wonders around your neck. He continues to do this until your pants and whines become erratic and fast and stops just at the right time for you to catch your breath.

You open your eyes to him, who seems to be enjoying your reunion, a sexy smirk across his face. You let out a smile whist still panting, and he seems to like what he sees, letting a soft chuckle.

"I remember that look on you. You're up to something.." He recalls as you push him to the sofa to his side, straddling on his crotch as you unbutton his long sleeves.

He grunts as soon as he plops on the sofa and groans as soon as you slowly wiggle your ass on top of him. You could clearly see the building frustration in his face as well as in his jeans.

You quickly undone seven buttons as he quickly tosses it somewhere and viewed his muscular physique as you sit on him. He became hairier and you find it very sexy, trailing your hand down his body, all while staring at him as seductive as you can. He smiles at the gesture as you slowly unbutton your shirt, never breaking eye contact, until he can't resist anymore and got up from the sofa. He lifts you down and you stand on the floor as he works your way to slide off your jeans. He quickly buried his face on your pussy as soon as he sees it and devours it like a hungry wolf. He never dissappoints as the feeling made you shudder, grabbing onto what's left of his hair in excitement. This goes on up until you softly pull his head out and move to unbuckle his belt, sliding his slacks all the way down as his cock springs free as soon as you take his boxers off.

You stare at him as you slowly jerk your hand around his cock, his eyes almost in a trance, as you teasingly kiss the tip, which was slowly oozing of precum. He grabs your hair and tucks it behind your ear as you slowly swallow his cock, giving him a blowjob that you've always imagined of giving him when you meet again. You're tongue slowly swirling around his length, feeling every vein and skin around it. You countinued mixing it up with your hand and mouth until he groans in anticipation and pulls you out of him.

He slowly gets up and shoves all his paperwork away from his desk and carries you to it, spreading your legs as he slowly pushes his tip on your opening.

You whimper at the first entrance, it felt different than usual, maybe because it's been quite a while since you to have done it, but that didn't stop the both of you from continuing. His eyes mesmerize you as he slowly picks up his rhythm, you can see his chest muscles bounce as he thrusts himself deep in you. He slowly rubs the upper area of your pussy as he thrusts, giving you a sensation that makes you wanna scream in pleasure. But given the circumstances, you only let out small gasps and whimpers. However, his grunts and moans are also getting louder, so you decide to let loose and follow his volume.

"Fuck." You whimper as he continues his fast pace as evidenced by the loud slapping noises. He quickly flips you to the desk and continues to fuck you from behind. Each thrust felt like the desk is inching closer to the wall, you didn't protest as you loved the sensation, how your walls clench as his warm cock slides in and out of you. You feel his motions change and you know full well what that means, you moan softly signaling him thay you're also almost there as he makes his final thrusts and shoots his warm load inside you, feeling the rush of his cum drip as he pulls his cock out.

He pulls you up and reaches for a kiss, a long yet intimate one as you both use the language of kiss to assure that you'll still be the same way no matter how distant it may be.

"See you after my shift?" he murmurs as he puts on his clothes, now all wrinkly and messy.

"Yes." you smile reaching for another kiss.

After preparing to go home, you quickly grab a pen and wrote the word you describe the drink, plaster it on the board and make your way out of the café.

[randomslasher]

I feel like I'm holding myself to incredibly high standards as a new fanfic writer which results in me abandoning my unfinished writings since I feel like my writing skills aren't "good enough".

Not an uncommon thing, truthfully. We all have an ‘inner critic’ that tries to stand in our way when we write. Mine got stronger after I took a bunch of writing courses in college, to the point that I lost the motivation to write at all for a long time. 

One of the ways I overcame it was to first separate the critic from myself and picture it as a separate person (a side, if you like!), then to give it a few gentle reminders.

1) “I don’t need you yet.” Your critic isn’t needed during the writing process, only during the planning and revision process. Your critic can be quite helpful while you’re figuring out what you’re going to write, and certainly helpful in revising after, but during the actual writing process, your critic needs to sit on the sidelines. Critiquing your work as you’re trying to get it onto the page is a really great way to stall out your progress. First drafts are allowed to suck. They often have too many adverbs, too many commas, comma splices, misspellings, tense shifts, unintended POV shifts--you name it, it’s there, because the idea of a first draft isn’t to write well, it’s just to write. Editing comes in the revision drafts. Tell the critic you appreciate the input but you don’t need it yet. 

2) “Remember what you’re supposed to do!” Remind the critic that overbearing behavior will cause you to stop writing altogether, and that ultimately accomplishes the opposite of what the critic wants: improvement. You will never improve if you don’t keep writing, so if what the critic wants is for you to get better, it needs to let you fail. It needs to let you write crap, if that’s what it takes, because only by writing crap will you learn how to write not-crap. 

3) Get a cheerleader! Counter the critic with a cheerleader! You can be one yourself by giving yourself affirmations ( “I’m doing great! This is a first draft and I’m just getting the ideas down for now. This idea is really exciting! I’ve typed a lot of words today, wow! I can’t wait to see what happens next!” ) or you can find a separate person to be your cheerleader. Just make sure that person knows what they’re needed for--a cheerleader is NOT a beta-reader or an editor. A cheerleader’s job is to cheer you on, not to point out mistakes. To get through a draft most writers need positivity, not constructive crit. Save that for the revisions, and get a beta reader for that. 

4) “Practice makes progress, but stop striving for perfection.” You may never feel that your writing skills are “good enough” for the critic. That’s okay. It’s a journey, not a destination. Every writer improves every time they write. You can see it in published works--an author’s earlier stuff feels less polished than later stuff in a lot of cases because the writer has gotten better since they started, even though their early stuff was still good enough to get published. You’re not aiming for perfection because it doesn’t exist. Remind yourself and your critic of that. Your goal should be a story you had fun writing, first and foremost, and then MAYBE, as a bonus, a story someone else will enjoy reading. That’s it. You don’t need perfection for that. 

I know getting through the voice of the critic can be tough, but remember that you’ll never improve if you let it shut you down. I hope some of these strategies help you in some way, and above all else, keep writing. Remind yourself that you never have to show anyone the end result if you decide you don’t like it but writing is never wasted time. A pianist who practices for hours in an empty auditorium hasn’t wasted his time just because no one else was there to listen. Every time he plays he gets better, stronger, more confident. The same is true for you and your writing, so keep writing. 

Good luck!