#edit: tumblr compression has me fucked up

[atompalmers]

first official look at josh hartnett in "fight or flight", out february 2025!

[rabid-invertibrate]

Um actually Vander isn't fully gone (the complete proof) (HEAVY SPOILERS)

spoilers for the entirety of arcane s2 obviously watch it if you haven't or don't if you care about your mental health

Although we see his memories/emotions get acetoned away in s2e7s final scene, and the following battle with his kids has him attacking them pretty rabidly.

But wait...

Tumblr compressed this image to hell, so you'll just have to trust me.

If you look closely as he lunges at Vi and Jinx, a tear appears in his right eye (not previously seen)

We can see it better after Jinx hits him with her rocket.

After Vik gets Jayced we see these tears on full display. The size of the tears is significantly larger, so we can assume they were spilled as Warwick corrupted the girls with void magic, indicating some amount of awareness.

Of course immediately after the screencap above Warwick attacks Vi, Jinx does a side slam and the father daughter duo barely get caught by Vi's gauntlet

Jinx and Vander plummet to their presumed deaths (they are both alive, but for drama’s sake, let's pretend). Vander/Warwick doesn't attack Jinx despite her being entirely in his grasp.

He could shred her right then and there. A mindless beast would, he doesn't.

Vander holds Jinx gently, he doesn't dig into her flesh, he just holds her and lets Jinx cup his face.

We see a flashback of Vander watching the girls sleep. Since he is the only conscious one in this situation this implies is that it is not Vi's or Jinxes memory, only Vanders.

Reader, you might think, well how the hell does he remember anything didn't he get mind wiped an episode ago. To that I respond I don't fucking know, but arcane is VERY intentional with its details and nothing else makes sense.

Jinx escapes, this isn't even subtle. She does so BEFORE the bomb blows. In no universe would Jinx break Warwicks grip, hell, she's toast if any stronger character grabs her (fe. Ambessas bodyguard). Do you know what that implies??

Since Warwick wasn't incapacitated at that point, HE WILLINGLY LET HER GO. He used the last shreds of humanity to give his daughter a second chance at life.....

I AM NOT OK

Below there's the more speculative part I'm not sure of.

Warwick, unlike Jinx, didn't escape into the air ducts. But we've seen him survive significant explosions in the very same episode, moreover he survived Isha blowing him up with the force of 3 magic orbs, and yet he lived.

This can only imply that Warwick/Vander survived. Of course the previously mentioned flashback shows Vander blowing a candle out which can symbolize his life ending, but I'd say it's more likely a subtle way of showing the destruction of their family unit as it was.

Edit: some people are calling this theory copium I'd agree at first but now that I thought about it more Vanders fate is objectivelly worse than death so i dont know if me being potentially right is a good thing.

(COMPLETE COPIUM BELOW)

I am aware this is complete copium yet maybe Jinx took him wherever the fuck she went on that airship to heal him up while sparing Vi from fighting their unkillable werewolf dad over and over again. Vander is still in there are proved by this long ass post, and I think Jinx knows that. I don't think she could give up on Vander like she wanted Ekko and Vi to give up on her.

□

Cool additional fact pointed out by commenter:

[kozachenko]

[Click image for better quality]

I FIGURED OUT A WAY TO FUCKING MAKE THE IMAGE SMALLER FOR POSTING ON TUMBLR WITHOUT SACRIFICING THE ACTUAL QUALITY OF THE IMAGE OH MY GOD

Ok so, what I did is go into the clip studio paint file, make a new file, copy and paste the group in the original file, merge everything, get rid of the extra stuff outside of the canvas, and then make the flattened image smaller and crop the canvas. Once you have that, export it and you're done. This helps maintain the actual quality of the image and also helps shrink the file size down to something actually postable (if anyone has a better way of doing this please tell me)

[Edit]: Ok I guess posting something to Tumblr just naturally compresses the image a bit more somehow because I'm looking at it now and zooming in too much makes it a bit blurry so I'm still gonna have to futz around with image quality for future pieces oof

Artist's Note:

I'm so glad I figured out a way to do this because I like working on a big canvas so I can get as much detail in as I possibly can. Only problems are how laggy it gets while drawing lol.

I had an idea for a drawing with Reimu and Zanmu because I really like thinking about their potential dynamic a lot. I also wanted an excuse to draw Zanmu again but in my normal rendering style because last time I drew her she was in my more sketchy style with generally flat colours so I wanted to draw her again. Speaking of, looking at the sketch for this is a jumpscare that I never enjoy seeing, like, man am I glad I didn't use those for my final piece.

Also about her spear. I was originally gonna make it like the ones she had in game, but it kinda threw off the whole piece. It was too big, too blue, and too flat, so I just went "fuck it" and gave her a different one instead. My headcanon justifying this is that the ones she uses in game are for danmaku battles whereas in any other fight she just uses a proper yari, or she still uses the yari and just makes it all glowy to power it up, maybe both lol. I pulled as much inspiration as I could from Sengoku era spears, and even put in some blue into the decorative part of the spear and also added a little skull to pay tribute to the original spear. Also, in my research I saw some art of izanami and izanagi making japan and saw that the yari izanagi has had a little decorative tassley thingy on it so I took some inspo from that and just made it one of Zanmu's tassles (Idk when that art was from or if the spear was still accurate to Sengoku period Japan but hey, probably the same reasons Eirin puts little bow ties on her arrows, it's just for personalization purposes).

I love rendering hair and clothes so much omg, while I like the super curly hair Zanmu, the longer, wavier hair suits her better for this drawing (I imagine it only does that like how Ghibli characters hair moves when they feel angry lol). I love making Zanmu's hair all messy and crazy, as well as giving her grey hairs, this woman has aged like a fine wine. Also, if the hem on the ends of her sleeves, top of her shirt, and her pants look like gold to you, that's because it is! It's fairly light so she's not collapsing under the weight, but it's gold! (I don't care how impractical it is, it's just cool). Not the undershirt though, it's made of a gold fabric. I had a cute idea with Reimu's hair to make it have a red shine to it. I also changed up Reimu's outfit so it isn't just a blob of red. I like it a lot when Reimu's skirt and outfit is segmented into different layers, so I wanted to incorporate that.

I tried to draw their hands differently as well, but IDK how noticeable that is. Also, I am super happy with how the side profiles for the two of them turned out, I used to struggle a lot with how to make the side profile of a character actually look like the character, so I'm really happy that they actually look like themselves.

Also added in the tree and rocks in the background as an homage to Zanmu's character art in Touhou 19, just because I was getting kinda stumped on what to do with the background lol.

In terms of a story idea with Reimu and Zanmu, idk why but the potential plotline of Zanmu wanting to ascend to godhood is so fascinating to me. Like, it is very possible that if she just convinced everyone she was a god (which would be very easy for her to do), she would become one in a heartbeat. Also, if she were to become a god, with her ability to return stuff to nothing, could she hypothetically get similar abilities to (Jojo Part 5 spoiler btw) GER? Like, idk about the death timeloop stuff, but the concept has been haunting me every night as I have been trying to find loopholes in GER's ability for a while now ( for no reason in particular). Back to the main topic, I imagine that she would probably tell Reimu that if she were to become a god she would take over the Hakurei shrine since the god there might as well be dead, and Reimu just says to her, "Over my dead body bitch." Like, I have no idea how to summarize their dynamic but like, it's the type of hero-villain dynamic where the phrase "We're not so different, you and I" would definitely be a phrase said during a fight. I think that if another IN style game were to release, Reimu and Zanmu would be in a team together. They could also have an interesting mentor and pupil kind of dynamic. Can you tell that Zanmu has been charging my mind rent these part few months? Like, instead of living in my head rent free, she kinda just uno reversed the whole situation and now she's the one charging me rent. What happens if I get evicted from my own brain? Actually, scratch that, I don't think I wanna know.

[reginalusus]

Hey! Idk what gif making program you are using but if you are sussing something that lets you select “keep frame” Vs “discard frame” you can put the background in only the first frame and have the next frames only include the moving parts on transparent background- it really cuts down file size. It also changes the look though, you’ve been making this very cool aesthetic. The background won’t “jump around/flicker” anymore if you do this. Anyway I hope this wasn’t obnoxious and can help, just one of many gif file size reduction tips among many from someone who used to spend hours making HxH gif sets for this website hahahha

Well, I draw everything on Procreate and use CapCut to edit, then I just use EZGIF or whatever it's called to convert and compress because it's just the best of the converters I have used.

I deliberately use noise though, I kind of like when the BG flickers a little. It's not really so much I don't want things moving? The issue is that, when I compress, it erases linework, therefore making everything look slightly blurred, but it makes it look 'older' IG, so whatever. I guess it's kind of a win-lose. That's not really what I care about though. It's the fact that fucking Tumblr always has issues with me uploading anything that is over 10MB in size. I might be crazy, but that is what I have noticed. And it's not just with GIFs either: I've noticed it with normal drawings too. Perhaps this is their revenge on me because I use the Brave browser?

Oh, well. It's not too bothersome. It just pisses me off when it results in it not showing in tags or on the dash. I actually reached out to Tumblr staff about a video I posted a while back and asked them why it just wasn't showing up anywhere, they just said that a lot of people have this issue and they don't know why. Helpful!

Thanks anyway, I'll keep this in mind.

[hospitalterrorizer]

diary31

10/5-6/2023

errand day.

it's funny how tumblr urges you with "go on, put anything." it's like a dare or something. totally psycho kind of. anyways errands were fine, basically, and i recorded two songs, but i made myself insane today anyways because i impulsively cut my hair to make my bangs "right" and i think they're fine and don't look any different actually except they might sit a little better but i miss my big hair and i should just not touch my hair until it's getting to where i want it to be again and then finally do that stuff and i feel ugly still and so it's all combining to make me really really fucked up or something and i'm basically so stupid that it hurts.

i like kept cutting tiny bits and shearing pieces off just to get like, it to fan out more and i got back in the shower like 3 times so i could re-blow dry my hair over and over and i hate being obsessive like this but i literally c an't let anything go if it feels wrong i need to keep doing it until it's right and i don't want to be like this anymore but my own life feels like a plastic bag on my face that i am trying to adjust just enough so i can breathe but not get rid of entirely, because the burden is necessary sometimes or something, and like, i keep going to the bathroom to check if my bangs look fine and if my hair looks fine and i can't stop myself and it makes me anxious and that makes my body temperature rise and it's so miserable. i am so hot even though it's like only 77 degrees in here. i am feeling slightly on fire and i can feel dampness on my forehead. and that will kind of make my bangs look worse because sweat=greasy greasy=hair sticking together and stuff. i think everyone knows. it's just awful. it's like a downward slope that's going to make me want to light myself on fire.

i want to feel like my hair is a giant blanket or scarf resting on my head, something luxuriant, or something. or at least to feel that one time out of the month, it would be really really nice. i'm really going to make myself feel awful if i keep talking about it but i don't know what else to talk about. today was good in every way i think and i'm just like this. no one really hates me except people who are bound to hate people like me, everyone who talked to me today was nice to me.

i wish i could feel like this again, i guess is how i feel.

at least all this obsessing over hair gave me an image for lyrics, so now one of the 2 min songs that had nothing has something, probably needs to be edited and fleshed out some but that's pretty good, and it won't need to be screamy the whole way through.

anyways, finally listening to a bunch of the songs, especially the more hardcore ones that are a bit older, their mixes are still kinda fucked but i think i definitely know what's wrong with them, they're a little boomy in the guitars meaning the low mids are maybe way too boosted, and the vocals could use more high end and compression, i should also see about lowering the guitars and maybe replacing them with some of the new ones i have but also, these are songs where low-mid heavy guitars are necessary and the newer songs are a bit, i dunno, sharper, i think the guitars here in some of these can sound fine they just need some brightening and re-eqing. otherwise i do have good foundations. some of the songs also need guitars placed in the left channel, i do think it would be good to have something different happening there, maybe plays on the main riff, weird alterations, someone getting really dissonant or something.

in the laundromat, i just sat and listened to orchid and stared into space, i didn't read like i wanted to, i just wanted to not exist kinda and staring into space helped with that, i also dim-wittedly put the clothes that needed drying into a broken dryer so i had to take them out and put them in a working one. #genius

okay, that's enough of today. i really want to shower already and sit and not be sweaty and hopefully get all this dumb stuff off my mind.

so,

byebye!!

[that-bajan-kid]

Boku No Hero Academia Chapter 292 SPOILERS

(Pogchamp)

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Imagine staying away from Tumblr, Instagram and Twitter to avoid spoilers, only to get spoiled by a fUCKING WHATSAPP GROUP CHAT I'M SO MAD RN

Y'all better believe I freaked out when I saw this. I've seen lots of theories about this too. Mostly traitor!Kirishima since Bakugou's doing his pose and the other two are posing like villains. Also fan art. So. Much. Fan art. Now on to the chapter.

We see Jeanist in the plane getting ready to jump out while the latest episode of Keeping Up With The Todorokis plays in the background and he's not too happy about Dabi using his and his family's trauma to destroy hero society. I get that Dabi shouldn't have exposed Endeavour in the most damaging way possible for everyone involved but in his defence 1) it's not his fault Enji was a peice of shit to his family and 2) Dabi's a Todoroki, being dramatic is ingrained in their DNA.

YAS JEANIST FUCK EM UP. Bakugou you really should not be standing right now, I can see the pain it's causing you all over your face. So was it really a dead body in that bag? And Dabi, didn't you also not believe it was actually Jeanist or did the months of him missing convince you it was actually him?

Dabi is glowing like the sun and smoking like a Colorado wild fire which can't possibly be healthy for him. Dabi is all "Whatever bitch, the Todoroki family drama is to strong to be defeated by mere steel wires. Right, Shouto?" as Todoroki charges towards his previously-thought-to-be-dead older brother with some fire of his own. Compress and Spinner are talking about how Jeanist actually managed to subdue Machia and Spinner is all "Doesn't Machia have super strength tho?" and I'm here sitting in my seat wondering if the anaesthetic finally kicked in as Jeanist tightens the wire around Machia.

Spinner realises that Machia has been panting ever since they arrive, aka when his orders were full filled. So now he's disparately trying to wake Shiggy up so he can give Machia a reason to stay awake but then a wild Nejire-chan appears out of no where and she looks fucking pissed the fuck off and I am here for it.

FOR FUCK SAKE DABI GOD DAMNIT FUCK

Istg if she's dead I'm gonna fucking riot. Man Shouto is not having a good time. Midoriya better has sit his ass down. The fuck are you gonna do? Cry at them?? You ain't got no arms bitch.

Oh look a new background for my phone.

(Edit: I like how the heat from his flames are warping the panels)

Izuku you are physically incapable of doing anything rn. Yeah Shouto is in pain but at least his bones weren't turn to liquid. Is Jeanist talking about Endeavour or himself? Cause Hawks is down for the count and I'd be pretty pissed if Hori let Enji keep his hero licence after this.

There was a house. I think it might have been Tenko's, I'm not sure. So anyway, Shiggy woke up and he's thinking to himself "Damn I'm itchy but I can't move. Lemme fix that." and then orders Machia to break free. So Machia is doing that and now Jeanist with his one (1) lung are having a hard time keeping up.

It's been like six months since I last visited duolingo but I'm pretty sure those sound effects say "Aaaaa" which I find hilarious. I also completely forgot this was happening. Is Shiggy calling back the NHE? Cause the others are fucked if that's what's happening.

I had the ending of this chapter spoiled for me so I already know who that is which sucks all the fun out of it but I'll act like I don't know who it is out of respect for their character.

Oh my god Burnin was save at the last second who could it possibly be????????

This panel looks really cool also Shouto's flames?

So Dabi and Shouto are battling it out final agnikai style and Shouto is all "So your the one who sent that villain to our house!!?! NATSUO ALMOST DIED YOU ASSHOLE!!! DON'T YOU CARE ABOUT YOUR FAVOURITE BROTHER?!!!!?!!!" And Dabi's stone cold response is "But Endeavour would have suffered" so Shouto has the natural response of "HAVE YOU COMPLETELY LOST YOUR MIND" to which Dabi responds with "YOUR GODDAMN RIGHT I DID." and how he no longer has the ability to care about anything anymore which is very sad but damnit this panel would look godly animated.

So Dabi is like "Now I can finally kill you" as he gets ready to kill Shouto and the NHE are showing up and Jeanist is completely out in the open now. Whatever shall happen now???? Oh dearist me. If only the heroes had another secret ace up their sleeve that was not in anyone's plans because of how unlikely it was to happen. I wonder.

DON'T YOU JUST LOVE IT WHEN PAST TRAUMA AND CURRENT TRAUMA MIX IN THE MOST TOXIC, SELF DEPRICATING WAY POSSIBLE???? Izuku, who has done literally everything in his power to keep everyone from a groosome desintergrating demise, the one who is physically incapable of moving, is really sitting here calling himself a useless hero because his body's natural instinct to not die, which he still has apparently, is preventing him from floating head first into the arms of Death. BOI YOU SHOULDN'T EVEN BE CONCIOUS RIGHT NOW WHAT DO YOU MEAN!??!!?

I swear if these kids don't get some therapy after this.

Oh my god it's lemillion what a surprise. Also, did he really just say "Pogchamp" lmfao. I'm still salty about being spoiled but that was really funny. How long has he had his quirk back? We know Aizawa has been training Eri's quirk but when did she get enough control to be able to fix him? I'm so glad she can control her quirk now cause it means she won't be scare of accidentally uno reversing someone out of existence.

Still very disappointed the Mirio reveal was spoiled for me. Pogchamp was hilarious but still. I'm sure the official translation will have him saying something boring like "POWERRRRRRRRR". Sigh. Welp time to commit verbal assassination.

Until next time.

[annalyticall]

23, 24, and 28?

23.  unpopular character you love

I am VERY tempted to say Hawks or Iida, because I think Hawks gets a lot of unnecessary hate for the things he has done for the manga and Iida just doesn’t get very much appreciation in general, but I also don’t think either of them are particularly unpopular. I mean, both have shown up many times on the top ten for popularity polls (I think Iida has been on it every year), so I think most of my perception is just what I see in Tumblr takes but isn’t true everywhere else.

I WILL say uhhhh Mr. Compress. I was a fan of his before he ever had his face reveal and he was my favorite member of the league before learning Dabi’s backstory. He only ever did the bare minimum and then called it a day because he wanted sushi and I appreciate that in a villain.

24.  popular character you hate

Ok so this USED to be Bakugo but as you know I have recently accepted him into my heart so I can’t use him for this answer anymore.

I don’t think he’s particularly popular but I don’t like Zenitsu from Demon Slayer. He honestly sort of ruins the show for me, which is a shame since I adore Tanjiro and Nezuko’s sibling relationship. It’s just so hard for me to get past his constant screaming and whining and I think the show would be improved so much if he was either toned down or wasn’t in it at all.

Edit: FUCK I forgot how much I fucking hate Light Yagami

28. most upsetting moment in anime, why

This answer took me two seconds to think about, and then I remembered 

Thanks for the ask!

[fen-ha-fuck-you]

Hello!!! I really love your gifs!! If I may ask, what program do you use and how do you manage to have such great quality?

Hi! Thank you!

I use Photoshop. Quality is a mixture of HD source video, creative use of blending modes, custom sharpening, the right export settings, and tumblr formatting. Beyond what I’ve outlined below, you’ll have to be more specific.

Blending Modes: When you’re coloring a gif, sometimes adjustment layers can really emphasize image compression (those squares that show up, usually in darker areas of the frame) or make things look unnatural in a way that’s hard to determine unless you’re looking for it. Changing the blending mode of any given layer from Normal to Color or Hue can help with that.

For example: This is an image I quickly edited with the Hue/Saturation and Vibrance layers’ blending modes set to normal.

This is the same image with Hue/Saturation and Vibrance set to Color.

It’s subtle, but there’s a difference, most visible in the petals. Look at these back to back, if you can.

Export Settings: First of all, you want to turn Web Snap down to 0%. Web Snap refers to the colors that your HTML5 browser of choice loads by default, which is great if you’re making clip art, but not so much for the sort of gifs you’re asking about. Web Snap will restrict your export palette from the beautiful range of the images above, to this:

Not ideal. Turn that shit off completely.

Secondly, dithering. Dithering plays a huge role in the visual consistency of the gif you’re exporting. Gifs can only hold up to 256 different colors, which means that any colors in your gif outside of that number are going to be lost.

Exporting a gif without dithering means that Photoshop is just going to guesstimate and group similar colors into the pre-existing 256 color palette without doing anything to try and smooth the borders of the splotches it creates. No dithering means you’ll end up with this. Pay attention to the clouds and mountain in the background, especially.

Dithering, on the other hand, tells Photoshop to smooth that shit out a little to trick the eye into thinking those color borders don’t exist. Your options for this are Diffusion, Noise, and Pattern. You’ve seen these in gifs before, even if you didn’t know what they were called. They add texture. 

Diffusion and Noise are very similar and both consist of a series of small dots across the image. I’ve found that Diffusion tends to be more visually pleasing than Noise, but that’s just me. Pattern is more of a small grid laid across the image that looks like very small plus signs or squares, depending on the area of the image you’re looking at. Pattern is the one that I usually go with. These options work equally well and are really a matter of personal preference. Again, pay attention to the clouds/mountain.

Diffusion:

Pattern:

Tumblr Formatting: This is probably one of the most overlooked aspects of creating a visually pleasing gifset on this site, and it’s weird that it matters, but it does.

Always post from desktop if you have the means to. The mobile app is garbage at the best of times, but especially for gif-makers.

Also incredibly important: Post your gifsets as a photo post. Not a text post. A photo post. Arranging the gifset you just spent x amount of hours creating in a text post is actual hell and it fucks up the dimensions I’m going to mention below because text posts don’t adhere to the same margins.

For the gif itself, I cannot stress the correct cropping sizes enough. Individual site themes are one thing, but the vast majority of the way you see gifsets on this site is on your dashboard, and the Tumblr dashboard has very specific dimensions that it’s willing to work with.

Width is the most important thing to pay attention to. A full-size gif (one column) needs to be 540px wide if you want it to show up here the way you made it. Full stop. This number used to be 500px, which is how you’ll see a lot of older sets, but anything smaller (or larger!) than the width dimensions noted in the post linked to this text is going to be blurry.

If you’re making gifs that are going to be side by side in two columns, they should be 268px wide. If you’re making a three column set, the gifs on the end should be 177px wide and the one in the middle should be 178px. Again, any difference in width here means that the gif is going to blur. The margins between gifs in a photo post will always be 4px (until tumblr changes dimensions again).

This was probably far more technical garbage than you were expecting, but I hope it helps at least a little.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 231: hey wHAT THE FUCK

Previously on BnHA: Horikoshi was all “lol what if the guy who can clone himself but is too afraid gets over his fears and makes like 200,000 of him,” and then he chuckled and did it. Re-Destro was all, “(. ❛ ᴗ ❛.) ...hey, Skeptic.” Skeptic was all, “!!!” and quickly faded himself out of existence like that kid in that one meme. The Legion of Twices rolled across the city leaving chaos in their wake, and helping Compress out of a jam in the process. Meanwhile King Cone continued to harass Dabi, who’s apparently starting to cook himself from the inside out, which I think we can all agree is probably not good. Then, over in the Ol’ Villain Laboratory, Ujiko abruptly decided to throw the LoV a bone and wake up Machia, because I guess Horikoshi was all “so anyway we should do that climax now I guess.” So on to the climax we go?

Today on BnHA: Machia awakens and starts zooming toward where the action is. We then cut to Osaka, where Hawks is apparently waiting for Dabi to show up (he’s late, wonder why that is) because he has a delivery for him. No idea what said delivery is, none whatsoever. Oh hey there, flashback of Best Jeanist -- OH NO. FLASHBACK OF BEST JEANIST, HAWKS IS COMING. OH MY GOD HE HAS AIRPODS ON HE CAN’T HEAR US ffffff. Anyway so we’re just going to ignore all of that, and back in the present Twice catches up with Spinner and Tomura who are both happy to see him and very pleased with his recent character development. The group of them have almost made it to Re-Destro’s tower, although both Spinner and Twice appear to be concerned about Tomura’s current exhausted state. The chapter ends with Twice (well, one of the Twices) arriving in the tower to rescue Princess Giran from Re-Destro’s clutches, which, fuck yeah.

(All comments are my 99% unspoiled reactions from my initial readthrough of the chapter. I did a quick edit for grammar and clarity immediately afterward, and added a couple of ETAs in the process, but aside from that there are no changes.)

so if anyone tried to send me an ask in the last 24 hours or so, you may have noticed that my inbox was temporarily closed (I’ve reopened it now). this was due to a very polite anon ask I received yesterday morning which was nonetheless ominous as fuck

like, holy shit, lol. so of course my brain immediately panicked and came up with a whole list of things that this could possibly be referring to

Giran dies

someone else dies

Horikoshi kills another dog

Kacchan’s provisional license is revealed but his thumb is conveniently blocking out his hero name because Horikoshi is, in fact, evil

Re-Destro transforms into a big ugly spider-crab creature like Overhaul

RD transforms into something even worse, like a mushroom, or a centipede

worst-case scenario: “My Hero Academia will be on break next week.” or for two weeks. or, god forbid, an entire month. can you even fucking imagine holy shit

so anyway, as previously mentioned I immediately closed my asks so as to protect myself from any potential spoilers, and then I settled in to wait. and now I am finally reading the chapter, so I guess I should brace myself for whatever terrible things are about to unfold

and we’re opening with... what the fuck...

I guess it’s a nose lol

lmao oh my god

are you telling me he is going to track down Tomura by scent. Tomura just how rank are you after six weeks of nonstop battling in the woods. no wonder Machia hates you so much. was it really so simple this whole time

anyway, so now this is happening

I’m not even the one he’s hunting down and even I’m terrified. say a quick prayer for the Liberation Army of Assholes, everyone. they were, as the name implies, assholes, but I’m not sure anyone deserves what’s about to go down. Geneva Convention about to be violated something fierce

ASKDFJLWIREFJOAIJDLKLSDKFJSLDAKF

WELL IF IT ISN’T THE BIRB TRYING TO GET IN TOUCH WITH HIS BOYFRIEND, WHO UNBEKNOWNST TO HIM IS CURRENTLY FIGHTING GOOD HUMOR WHILE TRYING TO COPE WITH HIS ORGANS BEING ON FIRE. HELLO THERE, HANDSOME

8. new worst-case scenario: Hawks fucking dies. oh my god. I’m about to go put this whole fucking chapter down right now and go take a walk while trying not to panic

so Hawks is crouching on that rooftop with a big ol’ bag. whatcha got there Hawks

(ETA: (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻)

and he’s being smart and stuff

okay correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure that Various Bits Of Giran ominously turning up at all of the League’s Greatest Hits locations ought to count as an incident related to the League. eh?? sounds to me like the Hero Network has been slacking

-- NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!

9. NEW NEW WORST-CASE SCENARIO BEST JEANIST FUCKING DIES WHAT THE FUCK

(ETA: and I also missed the part about the sidekicks the first time around! what the fuck!!)

BITCH I REALLY AM ABOUT TO GO OUT ON THAT WALK!?!? WHAT’S HORIKOSHI’S EMAIL I WANT TO WRITE HIM A VERY STRONGLY WORDED LETTER

shit. well look. if I just stop right here and don’t finish the chapter then it can’t hurt me. but on the other hand, if I quit BnHA right now and delete my tumblr then I’ll never find out Kacchan’s hero name. so anyway this is a really big dilemma for me as you can see guys, but I guess I’m just gonna have to suck it up and read on anyway because I apparently hate myself

ohhhhh shit

who’s he talking to?? that doesn’t sound like Dabi. and Tomura doesn’t know that Hawks exists. I’m thinking this must be Ujiko, then

lol he’s apparently out in public while taking this call, and his adoring fans are all “OMG WHO’S HE TALKING TO IS IT HIS GIRLFRIEND.” first of all, I think we all know Hawks doesn’t swing that way. and second of all, haha nope

anyway so now he’s flying off to go get some fucking privacy

okay now I’m absolutely positive this isn’t Dabi lol

because if that is Dabi being all “SPICY!!!” then I must say I’ve really failed to get the correct read on Dabi’s character up to this point. like, I could not have gotten that more wrong if I tried

wow Hawks is really going all in on his whole “secretly disgruntled traitor” act. if I didn’t know better I sure would be convinced

I love the juxtaposition between what he’s saying and what he’s actually thinking here. he’s so fucking smart, it’s ridiculous. constantly playing this dangerous game of chess in his head and judging what to say and how to act to best gain their trust

wow who is this?? maybe it really is Dabi

either that or someone new?? is the plot thickening?? jesus christ I was not prepared for any of this, I thought it was just gonna be a chapter of Gigantomachia fucking shit up. not all of this Intrigue

yep it is Dabi. wow Dabi. I’m gonna call you Spicy from now on you little freak

-- HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE

BACK THE FUCK UP. IS THIS IMPLYING THAT FUCKING HAWKS IS RESPONSIBLE FOR KIDNAPPING OR FUCKING MURDERING MOTHERFUCKING ULTIMATE FINEST JEANIST, BECAUSE I’M ABOUT TO LOSE MY SHIT OVER HERE WHAT THE FUCK

AND NOW WE’RE CUTTING TO ANOTHER BUILDING SOMEWHERE, STILL IN FLASHBACK MODE, AND IMMA KEEP THE CAPSLOCK ON JUST IN CASE BECAUSE I HAVE A FEELING THAT WE MAY JUST BE IN NEED OF IT

I CAN’T BELIEVE HORIKOSHI WENT FROM “HAHA LOOK AT ALL THESE TWICES” TO “HAWKS FUCKING MURDERS BEST JEANIST!!!” IN THE SPAN OF A SINGLE CHAPTER OH GOD

OH GOD!!!

BUT CAN YOU LIVE WITHOUT TWO LUNGS, BEST DEAD MAN WALKING???

FUCKKKKKKKKKKKFLSDKJ

MAYBE I DON’T REALLY NEED TO KNOW KACCHAN’S HERO NAME AFTER ALL SOB IT’S BEEN A GREAT MANGA EVERYONE, WONDERFUL GETTING TO KNOW YOU ALL BUT I CAN’T

... [CLICKS TO NEXT PAGE WHILE SOBBING!!!]

HEY WHAT THE FUCK WHAT IS THIS! WHERE DID THE FLASHBACK GO!!

HEY GUYS. OKAY LISTEN. IF BEST JEANIST’S HEAD IS IN THAT BAG, I’M ABOUT TO RAGE QUIT THIS WHOLE SCENE THOUGH

aaaaaaand now we’re cutting back to King Joffrey* VS Choco Taco. great

*this is a reference to Game of Thrones you guys. “bring me his head!” it’s not the best joke because I immediately realized it would probably require an explanation, hence me explaining it right now. but I’m not gonna go back and delete it though because, well. if the shoe fits, Spicy Boi

maybe it’s not Best Jeanist’s head. maybe I’m having an extreme overreaction to this whole thing. maybe the bag is filled with flowers. or letters to Santa that he’s delivering. or something else really good and wholesome and not-terrible

maybe they found someone with a cloning quirk like Twice’s, and they made a fake Jeanist and decapitated him? Hawks isn’t a fucking murderer though, like surely he wouldn’t go that far to gain the League’s trust even if it would save a lot of lives in the long run. right?? someone please reassure me here I feel like I’m on a boat slowly drifting out to sea with no way back sob help

oh hey look who finally decided to show up again!

and Spinner too! somehow I straight up forgot about him. maybe he’ll finally show us his quirk and we can forget all this Sopranos bullshit

wow, despite being completely fucking tanked from sleep deprivation Tomura is actually having a very reasonable conversation with Spinner and I’m fucking impressed actually

it’s really starting to seem that the lack of sleep is actually making him saner, which is extremely intriguing. it’s like whatever brainwashing/mental manipulation that Ujiko and AFO did is slowly losing its effect because of how tired he is. first the flashbacks, then the power upgrade, and now this uncanny single-minded focus that he’s developed. idk, just my theory, but I think we’re seeing a bit of his real personality starting to shine through here

anyway so I guess all these fuckers are about to die

place your bets everyone. will it be Tomura continuing on his rampage? Spinner finally revealing his quirk? Machia making his grand entrance? or a surprise entrance from Hawks wondering why his boyfriend didn’t show in Osaka like they agreed to retrieve his head in a bag sobbbbb

and maybe I should take back what I previously said about Tomura becoming saner, though. ...

though I mean, even if he’s saner in general he is still kooky from the no-sleep though

also it looks like the Twices have finally arrived! I didn’t even include them as an option to bet on. I’m really losing my touch here. it’s almost as if I’m distracted by something!!

okay, and now Twice is tackling Tomura to the ground for some reason while screaming “HIYAAAAH!” not how I was expecting you to deal with the situation Jin but okay

okay but not only is Tomura accepting this with more grace than some football quarterbacks, but he’s genuinely starting to remind me of Deku now holy shit. I take back my take-back. jesus christ when did he get so mellow?!

“I have no idea why you just fucking shoved me into the pavement for no reason but wow, you’ve really gotten stronger bro!” okay, things I was not expecting to happen in this chapter: Hawks going Full Evil while Tomura inches ever closer toward being a straight up nice dude

Twice is all “yeah!!” and says he hopes he can finally be useful to Tomura now. aww

meanwhile the Army of Dipshits is charging in again since they all want to die, apparently. I keep waiting for a few of them to have an epiphany in the background and be all “you know what, maybe I should get the fuck out of here and to hell with Re-Destro though.” but nope, they’re all idiots. it’s really something

Tomura is so fucking nice. his niceness is the balm I needed to soothe my anxiety over Best Deadest Jeanist

... [headpats]

he remembers from before that RD and Giran are supposedly up in the tower, and he’s more than ready to kill the former. quote unquote, “kill him reeeealll good.” that’s what I like to hear, Tomura

oh my god

motherfucking League of Softies right here. well except for Todoroki “Queen of Hearts” Touya. there, I worked in a more accessible chopped-off-heads reference for you guys. anyways he has issues, but the rest of the League of Angels is very sweet though

so Twice is shouting “just leave it to mes! hang on Giran, I’m coming for ya!” and I suddenly got scared all over again for Giran oh my god. please don’t hurt him, I was prepared for it before but now Best Jeanist is dead probably and I’m a fragile, vulnerable mess who’s trying to cope with humor and failing sob please

oh my GOD

SHIGARAKI TOMURA I KEEP JOKING ABOUT HOW NICE YOU ARE AND YOU KEEP ESCALATING YOUR LEVEL OF NICENESS TO MATCH MY FUCKING EXAGGERATIONS THOUGH, WHAT THE FUCK. “I WON’T FORGIVE YOU FOR TOYING WITH PEOPLE’S HEARTS LIKE THAT.” FOR REAL?!?! WHO EVEN ARE YOU

oh it’s this guy again

so did I honestly

you deserve to die a quick and brutal “Indiana Jones shooting the guy with the big sword” death, buddy. my fingers are crossed for Gigantomachia to just plow right through you as soon as I click to the next page. Horikoshi owes me, so

goddammit

wow this is almost verbatim Syndrome’s speech from the first Incredibles

also these guys just keep on getting more horrible. good job assholes

so Spinner’s thinking to himself that every time Hanabata gives a speech his lackeys get more fired up. and he’s wondering what to do because ‘I can’t let Shigaraki get any more exhausted!’

the love these guys have for each other though, I swear. like it genuinely is the sweetest thing. honestly the only real problem I have with this arc so far is that my disbelief is going to be crazy suspended if and when they go back to kidnapping kids and shit after this arc. there’s just no way I’ll be able to reconcile that in my head with the current League of Darlings here. I feel like it would be more consistent for their next scheme to be them angrily raising money for a charity or something

now what’s happening up in the tower

oh shit

that was fast Jin

and he continues to be hot. now he’s even doing it while still wearing the Deadpool mask! this is outrageous

gotta love that trash talk. “so you’re the asshole that kidnapped our broker and chopped off his hand and beat up my girlfriend! well guess what! YOU’RE BALD YOU BIG JERK”

Giran hotness status: still hot. this one basically goes without saying but it’s still worth a mention

bold fucking move bringing up your dead mouse secretary, Re-Jerko. sob. please don’t kill Giran or Twice. is that the real Twice?? -- no, because the real Twice is still sitting in that backyard with his arms broken, that’s right. but still, I’d prefer if you didn’t kill this one either though but whatever

where is Skeptic. you’d figure he’d have run into him on his way to the top of the tower. that’s unsettling, him still being out there somewhere

lastly, so long as Schrödinger’s Jeanist’s status remains unconfirmed I will go ahead and assume those really are letters to Santa in Hawks’s bag. that’s so sweet of you Hawks. you’ll fit right in with the League of Saints and I’m sure they’ll be pleased to welcome you

what a sweet and wholesome chapter where nothing bad happened and Best Jeanist is probably just off in Tahiti somewhere enjoying life with his one remaining lung well good night everyone

[soundrooms]

Soundrs: DJ CYBERDAD

My name is John Verchot, I’ve released music under several names: J-chot as well as DJ CYBERDAD. Locally, I’m usually just billed as DJ Verchot. I feel like the first thing I should tell you about myself is that I have severe ADHD, which seems to be the single most consistent force guiding my art and existence. I often get distracted and always get ahead of myself when I try to explain things. DJ CYBERDAD started out as a funny pseudonym to release more profane songs that I didn’t want my son to hear, but changed into an outlet for my smoother dance jams as well as more introspective music. 

What are your inspiration sources?

It varies from project to project. Often times with tracks, the inspiration to work on them comes in two or three different phases. Inspiration to create sounds is one thing, as inspiration to finish and structure tracks, create moods/themes, or even package them into a finished project, all feel like different driving forces/processes that need to happen in order for me to get anything done. However, whichever one of those forces I am able to utilize when I sit down at my laptop often seems to be beyond my control.

Most times I’ll hear a sound, loop or phrase, I’ll start to wonder what I can do with it, or how I can change and manipulate it. It might be the timbre of an old instructional video’s narrator, or an odd metallic sound I’ve managed to coax out of some equipment. Occasionally I’ll think of a concept, either of overall sound or thematic content and before I know it, I’ve got half a track planned out in my head. Many times I’ll hear other tracks or songs, and want to use just one part/concept/sound or re-do the whole track differently. With “Emotional in Destin”, I was trying to convey moods or feelings I felt during an unexpected trip to Florida in the middle of a crushing depression. It sounds bizarre, but I've never channeled personal experiences into my music before.

Overall what inspires me to create different sounds is the novelty of technology and bits and other people’s music.

What makes me want to sit down and make music is personal or professional success.

What inspires me to finish tracks and projects is the distant white noise of overwhelming anxiety and dread setting in as the ennui of the imminent collapse of western society fades giving way to the dark, almost imperceivable thrumming of the void drawing nearer, and is definitely getting louder. Your “time” is almost up John. Did you even do anything, or are you too skiddish and feeble of heart and head to make any clear decisions, impulsively flitting from one animal urge to another bad habit, clogging the chemical receptors of your brain for simple stupid pleasure. It’s night now and your eyes and fingers grow weary…

What was the question again? 

Tell us something about your workflow.

Most times, it starts with just noodling around. Sometimes, it’s with synths and sequencers, either recording sounds or looping notes and tweaking/loading patches (virtual or real synths), sometimes I’m browsing potential sample material, but what happens next is the same regardless of how I’m making sounds or what I’m doing:

…I think hear something.

…And I STOP noodling. Basically, I either hear something I like, or I hit a riff or whatever and it’s like a tiny, tiny light bulb that blinks barely. Occasionally it’s like a hundred watt, and other ideas quickly fall into place. Most times, it’s a process of trial and error, but I’m making sure to document or isolate the little pieces that click and then attempt to refine or improve on those ideas. Ideas can quickly diverge, multiple sets with different names get saved, and I often jump around and get lost. I use color coding on clips and pieces in Ableton to help me sort those ideas. Some ideas form by running one sequence I’ve had already through a whole different synth/patch.

Very rarely, I’ll get a concrete idea while I’m driving, maybe I’ll make some notes on my phone (text to speech notes, voice recording).

When I get a spark that makes me imagine a full concept (“Charles Nelson Riley”, or that “My P**sy tastes like Pepsi Cola” remix for example), the track is formed VERY quickly (four to eight hours working time) and I finish the mix, structure, everything. This is rare, but these tracks are almost always my better material.

The next step is always the same: Let the track “cool-off”. Leave it alone. Do something else for a few days, or weeks… or in some cases, years… Then I’ll fuck around with it even more, or move on to:

STRUCTURE & MIXING: 

I look for/experiment with arrangements that compliment my DJ style, or allow someone to do a rough edit if they want, (breakdowns at the end), or I’ll load a track that I like to DJ that’s similar enough and I will STRAIGHT UP copy the song structure in terms of intro, (drums or keys?) repeating bits, breakdowns, outros… Most times I fuck with it until it sounds okay, which is kinda bad because I end up drastically overscrutinizing it.

When it comes to mixing, something that I should do more often but don’t is load a reference track (someone else’s track) and try to get my mix to sound like theirs… This technique REALLY helps stop “nasty surprises” when you listen to it on a big system, or in the car.

Most of the time, I’ve been tweaking the mix the entire time I’ve been working on the project. 

TL;DR

The “Emotional in Destin” EP is almost entirely soft synths, but lately my flow is:

1. dick around on hardware

2. “oh that sounds good, let me make another sound to go with it” (see step 1)

3. record a few pieces to an Ableton project.

4. “I don't know what to do now.” …maybe mixing or structure…

…almost ALL THE TIME, however I jump around and do everything very non-linearly. Hardware helps me not spend so much time tweaking patches or EQ-ing a snare drum for an hour. Texture is SUPER important to me, so I’ll often get hung up on EQ and compression before I even start on structure or mixing. 

How would creative rituals benefit your workflow?

The hardest part for me is ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS getting started, or shifting gears from other activities (resting after work, reading tumblr, goofing off…) and going to sit down at my desk and start music stuff. I’m certain it’s an executive dysfunction thing. The less I think about doing it before I do it, the better.

Animal sacrifice SIGNIFICANTLY speeds things up. Try not to get blood on the gear/laptop, and make sure never to clean, but regularly sharpen the ceremonial dagger (VERY important). 

How do you get in the zone?

I don’t really try…

As soon as I start to approach a task as “a thing” I get nervous and anxious. If I go “okay, I’ve got this task to complete…” my subconscious hijacks my higher functions to make me look at memes or tumblr for three hours instead of do what I “should” or “want”… The problem with me in the past has been how do I get OUT of the zone? 

How do you start a track? 

Oh jeez, I really jumped the shark with that question earlier, didn’t I? A technique I’ll sometimes employ is load up an old track, keep the drum sounds/patches but delete all the data, and make an entirely different genre of track… or one that's very similar… That’s kind of a fun exercise if nothing else. Also it often winds up getting tweaked and adjusted to hell and back. 

Do you have a special template? 

Nope. I make TONS of drum, EQ, and effects presets though. And they all have terrible names like “gooddrums”, “$GOODrums” and such.

Even though I’ve started with carbon copies, they ALWAYS end up sounding completely different by the time I’m finished with the track, because I can’t leave em well enough alone. 

What do you put on the master channel? 

Sometimes EQ, but always a phat ass compressor (limiting). I’ve been thinking about investing in a nice non-free one lately, but for some reason I am not comfortable with purchasing software plugins… I also have learned recently, that I’ve been using compression on the individual tracks way too much… which makes final-mixing a pain in the ass. 

How do you arrange and finish a track? 

DAMN IT. I really did go too hard with the first couple questions. The “finishing” of a track for me (arrangement, mixing) is usually done much later than the rest of the process. I try not to force stuff, but lately I’m realizing more and more that I need to not do this as much.

I can’t stress enough how using a reference track for structure or mixing can very often break up stagnation on a project. 

How do you deal with unfinished projects?

Several ways. The first step is to judge an old file and see if it's worth finishing. If there is ANYTHING of creative/sonic merit, I put it in a folder with the other “sketches and ideas” (project graveyard). Otherwise, I have been trying to delete the “junk” projects… this can make it easier to focus. Another thing I often do is to make presets/patches/Ableton instruments from the parts I like, then drop it in a folder called “meh”. Or I drop them into several categorical folders, i.e.: “uncircumcised electro bangers”, “abrasive techno”. 

How do you store and organize your projects?

Aw jeez. Oh gosh-oh darn. (See above answer.) 

How do you take care of studio ergonomics? 

Trial and error, trial and error, trial and error. This year alone my studio has been restructured and moved about my downstairs room at least five times. I’ve finally settled on something that feels very useful and productive. I am also this way with my work station at my job. CHANGE IT UNTIL IT WORKS GREAT. This can also help with creative stagnation, or can trigger it, so be careful. I keep my “electronics laboratory” close at hand so that more of that tinkering can find it’s way into my music… no such luck, YET.

I’ve currently decorated my space with all the crap I’ve saved up over the years, that for some reason, I’ve looked at this and thought: “This makes me happy” …SUUURE, my studio now looks like a fourteen year old decorated it, but I gotta say, I feel pretty phenomenal. Soon I’m gonna try to put this “stars and space” wall paper on my ceiling… I’ll update with a photo when that’s done.

Also I would like to say:

Minimalist spaces and studios are bullshit, y’all look like sick baby birds in empty shoe-boxes.

I mean, NOBODY LIVES THAT WAY, right? Maybe some boring rich people do, but damn… I mean, I try to clean and stay organized… and it helps, but I also try not to get to hung up on it. 

Tell us something about your daily routine, how is your day structured, how do you make room for creativity?

**LOUD SUCKING SOUND THROUGH TEETH** I don't… at least, not very well at all… but I’m working on that.

I am not the person you should ask this question, because THIS RIGHT HERE is the BANE of my existence… 

Share a quick producing tip.

MAN, I’ve already dropped like… seven, but okay, here goes:

BY ANY MEANS NECESSARY, FINISH THE TRACK. For me, this means ghetto-rigging, DIY, using the same goddamn audio interface from 2002 for f****ng fifteen YEARS… (recently fixed) don’t get hung up on “proper” ways, or ways that are outside your current means. Also, get a set of decent monitors… or use several pairs of headphones/speakers to double check mixes.

Recently, I’ve had less time, but a little bit of money, which is the opposite of how I’ve ALWAYS operated… it’s been difficult to unlearn “time consuming but cheap”. Also difficult not to impulse buy synths. 

Making music with just a mouse and keyboard may be the least sexy thing ever… it works tho… cheap MIDI controllers CAN work faster however. 

Share a link to an interesting website (doesn’t have to be music related).

My son just showed me this ➜ https://dddance.party/ and I have to say, this is an outstanding achievement of mankind. 

List ten sounds you are hearing right this moment : ) 

Traffic outside my window, gentle hum of laptop cooling fan, dog snoring, fingers typing, birds chirping… that’s it.

John has a lo-fi house EP out on UltraBold Records as DJ CYBERDAD. It’s called ‘Emotional in Destin’. Stream it ➜ here, audio cassettes are available ➜ here.

Thanks John! If you want to get featured next, send a message here on tumblr or email soundrooms@icloud.com.

[thatoneaceinthecorner]

Tag Game: About the Author

I was tagged by @jaywrites101, I love your blog and thank you!

Rules of the game: Answer these questions and tag blogs you’d like to know better.

Nickname: Hmm. I don’t know that I really have a nickname? My younger sister calls me Loki but that’s about it. My parents still call me a little abbreviation of my first name sometimes, and so does my oldest friend, but most people just use my name.

Zodic: Scorpio. I don’t really believe in zodiac stuff, but I do fit pretty much every aspect of my sign except the high sex drive thing. I’m asexual, so that’s definitely inaccurate, but everything else is pretty close.

Height: 5’ 9”. But I’ve been inspired by Jenna Marbles and have decided to grow four or five more inches. No one can stop me.

Time: It’s 2:27 in the afternoon. I just got home from a doctor’s appointment and getting an IV treatment. I’m tired, but that’s a permanent fixture of my existence.

Favorite band/artist: I’m one of those people who has a playlist full of random songs of different genres that I happened to like becuase either they tell a story, or have some other emotional draw, rather than having all the songs be a specific artist. However, I do tend to enjoy Barnes Courtney, Imagine Dragons, Panic! and few others pretty consistently. Also I listen to a lot of obscure showtunes (Death Note, Hadestown, etc.)

Song stuck in my head: Lately it’s been Avicii’s cover of Feeling Good.

Last movie I saw: Avengers Endgame. I cried. Several times. And I don’t usually cry at movies.

[Edit: Fuck that movie. It was terrible.]

Last thing I googled: The Norwegian word for wonderous. For a writing project. (It’s vidunderlig, if you’re curious.)

Other blogs: @mustbewriting is my brand new writeblr.

Do I get asks: I have gotten exactly one ask. Though it wasn’t actually a question, it was a comment about how my username reminded them of a song.

Why this username: Honestly it was just the first thing that popped into my head. Also it’s accurate.

Following: Only 81 blogs, now that I look at it. I’m just here to goof off, if I like your stuff I’ll definitely follow you but I don’t actively engage a ton. I’d like to, I’m just not very good at it.

Averge amount of sleep: As much as I can get. I’m chronically ill, so I’m at home all the time. I go to bed around ten and get up around eleven. I don’t sleep that whole time, but if I get much less than that I’m even more of a groggy mess than I’d normally be.

Lucky number: 11 and 13.

What I’m wearing: Black t-shirt with a Doctor Who quote on it, black pants, black and grey argyle compression socks. Usually I’d be wearing pajamas, but since I just got home from the doctor I’m still dressed.

Dream job: I’d like to be an at least marginally successful novelist, making enough to support myself comfortably. I’m going to write books whether I get paid for it or not, but getting paid well for doing what I love would be spectacular.

Dream trip: I’d like to traipse around Europe, taking as much time as I want without having to worry about the cost. And when I say Europe, I mean all the way from the tip of Portugal, through every European county, around the UK, up into Norway and Finland and Sweden, and all the way down to Greece and Turkey.

Favorite food: Oh, this is hard. I have so many dietary restrictions it’s hard to come up wit a “normal meal” that actually gets me excited. I think I’ll just go with really dark chocolate. That’s a food, right? Anyway, it’s the thing I eat with the most consistency.

Instruments I play: Guitar, ukulele, a bit of mandolin, and some piano. I can’t read music, and I’m self taught, so my skill pretty much extends to any song I like and can find chords/a tutorial for.

Eye color: They can’t really decide between blue, green, and grey. They could be any of the above with an -ish added to the end.

Hair color: It’s brown on my birth certificate, but often people refer to it as blond. I don’t know. It’s an odd burnt honey color, I suppose.

Aesthetic: Hmm. For colors, that would be black, dark green, silver ... I’m a slytherin, so something along those lines. As far as clothes go, I’d rock a sharp black suit, no tie, with my silver snake earrings and black boots. Maybe an infinity symbol pinned to my lapel.

Languages I speak: English is my first language. I’m learning Norwegian, I speak a tiny bit of Spanish, I have an array of random Italian vocabulary, and I used to study Latin, so I have all the major Latin roots still floating around in my head.

Most iconic song: Sinners by Barnes Courtney.

Random fact: About me? My younger sister has designated me ‘Protector of the Crawlies,’ becuase I rescue spiders that have wandered into our house. The rule is that if I name a spider, she isn’t allowed to kill it. Most recently I liberated a spider that was chilling on my desk, and another (very tiny) that was for some reason hanging from the lense of my glasses. I’m starting to think that they like me.

Tagging: I’m not super active within the tumblr community, so I don’t know a lot of folks, but here’s my list:

@kirschteins-delivery-service @kissgiirls @smallnico @aro-ace-from-outer-space22 @thebibliosphere @thorlokibrother @headspace-hotel @gayandgoodatmath @owl-writes @swordsdippedinshadows @galexy-eevee

[monstersandmaw]

Female orc x buff female reader (sfw, mostly)

Edit which I’m including in all my works after plagiarism and theft has taken place: I do not give my consent for my works to be used, copied, published, or posted anywhere. They are copyrighted and belong to me.

Anon suggested that there should be more buff/strong/muscular women readers, and I wholeheartedly agreed, and spent the rest of the day writing this story. It was posted on my Patreon on early release, and it’s time to put it up here now. If you want exclusive early access to all Tumblr stories (except paid commissions when they’re open), and a Patreon-only story once a month, then head on over to my page and subscribe if you can! There are monster aesthetics and polls to help me decide what to write next, as well as posts from my original fiction and little snippets that I’ve come up with along the way. 

Anyway, here’s a modern orc lady and a buff female reader.

___

All gyms are essentially the same, no matter whether it’s a 24hr one or an exclusive city gym full of Instagrammers and fitness bloggers.

There’s the row of treadmills, filled with people puffing and panting, some just starting their fitness journey while others have steel-hard thighs and calves already; there are the bikes with the people texting and barely pedalling to the would-be Tour de France-ers going at it hell for leather; there’s the stupidly good-looking trainer walking around doing fuck-all and fist-bumping the regulars; and the shy folk working up the courage to use a machine in the main area: it’s the familiarity from which you draw comfort, even in a new place.

You adjust your thick ponytail and crick the tension out of your neck. You’ve done your warm up, and you’re ready to go to the hallowed weights section, enshrined in a far corner.

And sure enough, there’s the usual minotaur showing off how much she can bench, and there’s the orc doing bicep curls with a dumbbell as big at each end as your head, but it’s home to you. It’s only as you step closer that you notice the most beautiful orc you’ve ever seen, doing squats with a barbell.

Her ass is so perfect it makes you want to cry. She’s wearing tiny compression shorts that show every muscle of her gleaming, emerald green thighs, and a crop top that reveals washboard abs that actually make you a little dizzy. Her thick, red-dyed dreds are tied back in a low ponytail and they clack and clink with beads and shells. When she carefully sets it down and straightens, she glances over her shoulder, apparently looking around for her water bottle.

It’s sitting at your feet beside the racks. She catches sight of it, her liquid, dark brown eye seeing it, and then her gaze rakes up your body in a way that’s so much more than simply ‘appreciative’. Her lips part softly but before you can watch any more of her reaction to your tall, lean, hard body, you grin, stoop down and pick up the bottle.

“This yours?”

She nods mutely, and you toss it at her. She catches it flawlessly and drinks deeply from it before looking you straight in the eye and grinning her thanks.

“You free?” you ask, and she frowns, curious. You laugh at the crinkle in her brow. “If you fancy it, would you mind spotting for me when you get a minute?”

She eyes your biceps in the sleeveless top you tend to favour for weights days. “You look like you’d last longer than a minute,” she mutters. Her voice – a rich, rasping alto – sends a rush of blood straight down between your legs. She sets her bottle down and juts her chin at the bench.

As you set the weight and settle onto it, you toss her a cheeky grin. “Oh I can go for hours.”

“Careful,” she smiles, hands hovering momentarily as you adjust your grip on the bar. “Don’t distract me too much. You need me to count for you?”

“Sure.”

By now your little encounter has attracted the attention of the big male orc and his buddy, a massive centaur with the body of a draft horse. Even the minotaur has stopped her routine for a moment. They’re watching with unveiled interest and curiosity as you begin, and you feel that familiar, gritty determination sink into your muscles, into your bones, suffusing your whole being with the fervour to push yourself to your limit and then half a step beyond.

Your orc’s sculpted eyebrows, both pierced, rise a little higher as you keep going, until finally you nod and she helps you guide it back onto the rest. You’re panting hard, lactic acid burning your shoulders, setting the sinews aflame, but she’s just standing there as you sit up, one hand on her hip, the other flicking her towel over her shoulder. “Damn,” she finally chuckles, clearly at a loss for something more eloquent.

“I’d love to see what you can lift,” you say as you lever yourself to your feet and stretch your shoulders and arms out.

“I could always bench press you,” she grins.

“I usually save the acrobatics for at least the second date,” you reply instantly, and laugh as her eyes go wide.

It’s odd to see a shy expression on such a tough beauty. “You… You want to?” she falters.

“What, have you bench press me, or go on a date?” you chuckle, heading to the water fountain to refill your bottle, not looking back at her.

You know the shorts your wearing look good on you. You know she’s looking at your shoulders and arm muscles. It’s also the first time she’s seen the slogan on the back of your shirt, and she snorts with laughter as she reads it.

It reads: worth the weight.

You fill up your bottle and then stoop somewhat provocatively over the fountain, comfortable with the way your body moves, with the looks your hard muscles garner. It’s not to everyone’s taste, but you’re proud of your hard work, and you know you look good. Wiping the sweat and water off your chin with the bottom of your loose tank, you reveal your stomach to her before letting it fall to cover you again. “Coz I’d be open to either, preferably the latter then the former, but whatever works for you.”

“You free after your session?” she asks as you nod. “I’m Lily, by the way.”

Somehow the name really suits her. You tell her your name, and she repeats it softly, grinning around her big tusks.

She hangs around in the gym longer while you finish up, and you head down to the changing rooms and showers together. She comes out of her cubicle a while later with her hair piled out of the way on top of her head, her back is still wet, and she’s utterly, unabashedly naked.

“Warn a girl,” you mutter as you step out into the air-conditioned room, your own towel wrapped around under your armpits still.

She has the physique of an Amazon, and the gentlest looking hands. She turns over her shoulder and flashes you a grin. She’s got two dimples at the base of her spine and the curve of her ass was just so perfect you wanted to lay your hand on it. You can just see her rounded breast and dark nipple, pebbled against the chill of the room.

“Where’s the fun in that?” Lily replies with a grin. “You got me off-guard upstairs. It’s only fair I try to return the favour…”

She reminds you of the best kind of sparring partner and you grin openly at her. “I like you,” is all you have to say.

Your lockers are on opposite sides of the changing room, and when you’re done, you turn to find her sitting cross-legged on the bench in the middle of the room, watching you. She’s wearing a loose-fitting tank top, small, denim shorts, and baby-pink Converses. You’re surprised by the amount of jewellery on, particularly rings on her hands. It’s not overdone, but you’d not imagined she would be a jewellery type. Despite the rock solid muscles in her arms and thighs, her style suits her perfectly, just like her name.

She walks with you out of the gym, asking you about where you live and what you do. You tell her that you recently moved to the area for a new and better job, and she smiles. Lily works at the university, and rolls her eyes at your ‘brains and brawn’ comment. “You must get that a lot, I’m sorry,” you say, blushing.

“Coming from you?” she chuckles, shooting a sideways glance that rakes up your body again in a way that makes you shiver and your mouth go dry. “Come on, there’s this great ice cream place just round the corner from here. You’re gonna love it, and you earned it today!”

“You bet I did!” you laugh.

You both end up having chocolate and sitting on a park bench to enjoy it.

As you finish yours, you look up and see her watching you. Her tongue flits to the corner of her mouth, just catching her tusk.

“What, did I miss a bit?” you ask playfully.

“Yeah,” she says, eyes locked on your lips.

You smile and tilt your head in clear, if not overly-ostentatious invitation.

Her big, gentle hands come down on either side of your jaw and she leans down, kissing you so tenderly it’s almost hesitant.

“You’re not going to break me,” you whisper, and she inhales deeply.

“You want to come back to mine?” she asks, voice thick and rasping.

You nod. “Sure.”

Grinning, she stands, her denim shorts showing her legs off to incredible advantage, and she takes your hand and leads you back to her apartment.

___________________________

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[tumblunni]

Okay it seems we don’t actually have a full res pic of all the pokedex and that pic actually was compressed to the point of unviewability even on desktop tumblr?? And clicking through the link it seems it’s really hard to run this supposed rom file of the beta, and there’s debates about its authenticity cos the file claims it’s the ‘spaceworld demo’ yet we have limited pics of that demo and the titlescreen was different. So it seems weird that this would be labelled as that very specific demo, unless it’s a.. beta of a demo, i guess? That could be possible cos people are saying it literally just crashes when the world map runs out, instead of having your usual ‘thanks for playing this is where the demo stops’ message. So AAAA I wish I was smart enough to understand all this technical talk, and to do the hex editing stuff to actually play the rom myself! But for now I guess I’ll just wait with baited breath and hope there’s more updates as people pick it aprt.

it would REALLY suck if it turned out to be a fake rom hack or something, tho. i hope that’s false and the confusion is just cos it was a fragmented rom or a demo for a different event than people think it is, or something. But tbh it would be a prime time to release a fake demo hack, since we recently had the first new slice of beta info on the early generations that we’ve had in decades. it would be a good time to ride the hype on the speculation about ‘gorochu’. BUT then it doesn’t seem like a rom hack because wouldn’t it actually be a straight up rom, then? like actually playable without a bunch of editing and datamining and running through five emulators at once? i would think it would be harder to fake a non functioning rom that’s still rescue-able, yknow? and why would they even do that, nobody would even be expecting a non-functioning rom so it wouldn’t add more authenticity. We haven’t ever got ahold of any beta roms for the gameboy games so we don’t have any preconceptions about what file type nintendo stored them as. But then on the other hand it seems really unlikely that we’d suddenly get a burst of new info on stuff that was never even remotely mentioned before by nintendo. But then again nintendo itself just did that with gorochu! And TCRF is a really credible source, and they actually dug up that screenshot of beta girafarig SO MANY YEARS after we first heard nintendo talk about the concept, and it matched perfectly with what we were expecting. And it just dropped out of NOWHERE overnight and left zero signs of where the user managed to find it, yet was still proven to be legit...

Also like seriously half of the gold and silver beta art looks completely non-legit, its all in a wildly different art style! I don’t know if anyone’s ever found out why that is? Like does it just mean they had multiple artists at the time and were still experimenting before they settled on sugimori as the main one? But gen 1 had already had a full set of sugimori art by then. but then again later interviews had nintendo revealing that ‘half of gen 2′ were actually designed in the process of making red and green, and they just got cut out because of cartridge space. (So basically, beta stantler + 30 others were what became missingno.) So it could be entirely plausable that these gen 2 mons were designed BEFORE some of the gen 1 ones, and thus had different art...? Though there’s also the theory I had which i haven’t seen anyone else talking about. Considering how the Spaceworld Beta has been super shrouded in myth and we only have first hand accounts of what the pokemon vaguely looked like, maybe these ‘beta artworks’ are actually fan art someone made while attending the convention? like not fake betas or anything, i mean someone was trying to quickly jot down the mons while the demo reel played, cos they couldnt take pictures. And then all the confusion of passing info between japanese and english fandoms in the early days of the internet could mean this stuff was archived as ‘early official art’ and not ‘artist’s recreation of unreleased promotional material’. I just started thinking about this because the screenshot of beta girafarig ended up being EXACTLY the same pose as that artwork of it. And it’s very rare that sprites exactly mimic the official art, especially back in the gameboy era where the sprites were rudimentary and inconsistant between versions. So it seems more plausable that this maybe proves the art was drawn by someone seeing that sprite?

Further potential proof- the ‘beta art’ of Silver:

Now that’s not only a wildly different art style but he’s drawn with super big cutesy eyes and cheek blush. I mean that could indicate his personality was completely different back then, or it could indicate this was someone drawing their own interpretation of a different official art, who didnt know what role this character would have in the actual game. Also we’ve heard people saying that Silver’s gender was unknown at the time of this first beta appearance, so that could potentially mean this fan artist draw him shoujo-style cos they headcanoned the new rival would be a girl? or just that the androgenous style of his appearance would equal a personality that was typical of an androgenous anime character- i.e a cutesy shy boy or a rowdy tomboy girl, etc. Tho tbh that whole line of theory confused me because this beta silver seems to have similar short hair to his redesign way later. I don’t think this design would be remotely perceived as ‘androgenous’ if the art style wasn’t drawn cutesy like this. So maybe this was indeed the early art style? And man, who knows, maybe the inconsistancy of sugimori already existing just means that they weren’t gonna keep sugimori in the second game? The very sketchy nature of these artworks could make sense if it was an attempt to completely redesign a new style for the sequel, so every generation would look different. I wonder what genre of anime every other region would have looked like! I’m imagining some sort of mysterious Clamp-esque style for sinnoh maybe, since its the ‘relic region’? And maybe unova would have even been american cartoon style!

Anyway in summary bunni is very confused and also bunni really fuckin misses silver’s old long haired design and will NEVER FUCKING UNDERSTAND why they gave him the exact same hair as roark and mars in the same generation they introduced roark and mars. (I dunno why people don’t include roark in the family headcanons. Mayb just cos his without-hat look is only seen briefly in anime?)

[tellywoodtrash]

ishqbaaz/dbo 22.05.17 lb

holy shit this legit took me like 3 hours to complete. fuck meeeeeeeeee. i’m very smol and tired, i can’t handle this amount of drama on the daily yougaiz. fairly sure this week of episodes IS GOING TO KILL ME DEAD. 😥😥😥

plain text version here. 

FOR FUCKS SAKE SOMEONE GIVE RUDRA NEW CLOTHES, KAB TAK IS COCKROACH KA KHAAYA HUA TSHIRT PEHNE HUE GHOOMEGA???? HE’S AN OBEROI. THEY’RE RICH. KUCH TOH IMAGE KA KHAYAAL RAKHO! 😒😒😒

…how is NT rich enough to arrange for a BOMB? like… that stuff costs money. also specialised labour to put it together. 🤔🤔🤔

yeah you’d know what the chakkar was if you bothered keeping in touch with your poor older brother who’s handling EVERYTHING alone. hmph. 😑😑😑

such tadi, much style, waaah. 😎😎😎

5 minutes for dramatic posturing. while sahil is in danger. praan jaaye par swag na jaaye. 😏😏😏

shivani has transferred her buri nazar to kunal these days, by now putting HIM in these awful boxy vest waistcoat things, that make him look like he has a winnie the pooh body. COME ON MAN!!!!!! LAANAT HAI TUMPE FOR MAKING MY HANDSOME BOY LOOK LIKE THIS. 😩😩😩

for once, shivaay called a brother for backup. FOR ONCE. matlab itne bhai paal ke kyun rakha hai, agar kaam na aaye? 🙄🙄🙄

PICK UP YOU FUCKING IDIOTS. RUDRA HAS SOMETHING IMPORTANT TO SAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 😣😣😣

yuppppp, these vans are desi kidnapper vehicle of choice. to this day i’m terrified whenever i see one. 😕😕😕

OMG KHANNA ACTUALLY USING HIS BRAIN??? OH HAPPY DAY. 🙌🏽🙌🏽🙌🏽

… of course, shivaay ignores him on that one day. 😒😒😒

um, if you die, who tf is gonna save sahil? honestly shivaay, you’re so damn stupid sometimes. 😑😑😑

great, not one, but both are being stupid today. 

but i’ve come to expect it of om after how he’s been just walking into havelis with ppl who wanna kill him and just getting lured into cages and shit. you used to be the smartest boy, om. oh how the mighty have fallen. 😔😔😔

GOD FORBID KHANNA ACTUALLY DO HIS DUTY AND OPEN THE FUCKING VAN HIMSELF!?!?!?! 😒😒😒

ok they were still waaaay toooo close for them to be uninjured by a whole van blowing up. 😶😶😶 

also what if sahil was IN the fucking vannnnnnnn you motherfucking idiots?!!?!?!?! god i am so angry at all of you rn. DON’T BE PLAYING WITH MY CHILD’S LIFE LIKE THIS!!!!! 😡😡😡

oh. nowwww he thinks about if sahil was in it. ekkkkkkk jhaap mein… 😤😤😤

ugh return of the insufferable shivaay of yore. NO. WE DON’T LIKE THIS BOY. WE LIKE NEW SHIVAAY™. SOFT AND SELF AWARE SHIVAAY WHO TALKS IN FIRST PERSON. 😌😌😌

i’m sweatingggggg like cray just looking at the SWEATER kunal is wearing. shivani, y u hate my boys lyk dis? 😟😟😟

oBro hugzzzzzzzz. better than drugssss. 😊😊😊

is this same basti where they did poster hunt? 🤔🤔🤔

anika got her game face onnnn. 😏😏😏

oufffffff, NT is starting to get on nerves now. khatam karo yaaar yeh track. 😠😠😠

anika’s playing real estate agent in own house. best. 🙄🙄🙄

BITCH WHAT YOU SAYYYYYYY ABOUT SAHILLLLLLLLLLL 😡😡😡

look at SHIVAAAAAAAY SINGH OBEROIIIIII take the help of unsavoury looking members of public! 😧😧😧

11 saal??? how the f did sahil age 4 years in these few months??? 😯😯😯

if this lady is just a parent of some friend of sahil’s, how would she know sahil has taken SPECIAL CHUTTI from boarding school???? 🤔🤔🤔

behenji ki battiiiiiiii jali. 💡💡💡

BAAD MEIN PHONE KAROGI? HELLO, WHAT ABOUT AKSHAY???? HE HAS TO CUT HIS BIRTHDAY CAKE!!!!!!! 🎂🎂🎂

mmmm cake. i could use some cake rn. 😋😋😋

she hasssssss the magic powerrrrrr of THOUGHT. 😒😒😒

you know NOWWWWW. abhi gila shikwa karne se kya faida? 😐😐😐

“tum ro kyun rahi ho??? roti hui bilkul achchi nahi lagti.”

OH UM MAYBE COZ HER BROTHER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED? I THINK IT’S PRETTY APPROPRIATE TO CRY. 😒😒😒

ALSO WHO GIVES A F ABOUT KAISI “LAGTI HOON” WHEN MY FUCKING BROTHER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED?!?!?!? FUCK OFF WITH YOUR BS STANDARDS OF BEAUTY BRO! 😠😠😠

ohhhh hoooooooo, redemptionnnnnnnnn track. 😏😏😏

… how did he just convert a regular phone call into a SKYPE video chat??? 🤔🤔🤔

OMG. HE’S IN THE PAANI. BECAUSE OF NT KA TAAAAIRNE WAALA STATEMENT. 😧😧😧

…. ok suddenly its NIGHT now? 😐😐😐

snort, om came home and instantly got caught up in his own issues. sahil who? bomb blast what? 😂😂😂

why does jhanvi have oxygen cylinder and mask just… lying around in her room? 🤔🤔🤔

CAN SOMEONE TELL ME WHO THE F THE FAKE SVETLANA IS? LIKE… IS SHE A KAPOOR OR NOT? AND HOW LONG HAS SHE BEEN IN THIS DISGUISE? WAS THIS FAKE ONE THE ONE WE SAW FROM THE START IN IB, OR DID SHE REPLACE THIS ONE SOMETIME IN THE MIDDLE? I HAVE SO MANY QUESTIONSSSSSSSS AND NO ANSWERS!!!!!! 😩😩😩

why is real svetlana dressed like an airhostess? 😕😕😕

“main shaadi-shuda hoon. mujhpe dore daalna bandh karo." 

svetlana’s BITCH PLEASE face at that lmaooooo. 😂😂😂

pft, you’ve been failing at EVERYTHING for the past 3 months, om. leave the smug overconfidence to your big bro who actually does get things right occasionally. 🙄🙄🙄

why the f should there be FOOTPRINTS on marble/tile flooring????? 🤔🤔🤔

fauxlana is (relatively) smart. i like. 😌😌😌

pft, don’t be making awaiiiii ka regret face for red herring purposes. we know you got him. you wouldn’t return otherwise. 🙄🙄🙄

damnnnn, reyhna is so fucking gorgeous. i am in loveeeeeeee. 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍

lol ok real-lana’s bholi bhaali way of talking is kinda throwing me off. 😆😆😆

amazing how she’s been comatose in a freezer for god knows how long, but her memory and muscle function and all are A-OK! 😊😊😊

meanwhile, i struggle to move my goddamn limbs and form a coherent thought without even having been thrown in a freezer. 😖😖😖

aaaaaaaaaaand gauri is out. 😐😐😐

glucose daale bina hi, magically the glass of glucose paani got made. 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽 

this outfit of gauri’s looks pretty much like that white salwar of anika’s that she sleeps in these days, no? 😗😗😗

LOL FAUXLANA AND THIS FREEZER OF HERS. 😂😂😂

the scene changes are too fucking abrupt ok. 😕😕😕

come on, this child is not 11. look how tinguuuuuu he is. my little cupcake. i could eat him up in just oneeee bite. 👶🏽👶🏽👶🏽

WHATCHOO DOING JUST STANDING THERE, GET IN THE HUGGGG, BROOOO. 😚😚😚

YAAAAAAAAS!!!!!!!!! 😊😊😊

LOOK AT MY LITTLE FAMILY. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO PERFECT. I LOVE THEM ALL SO MUCH. 😭😭😭😭😭😭

wow, she just gave it away instantly WHERE gauri is. 😐😐😐

… what temperature range can a FREEZER have that a human being can stay alive in? science side of tumblr, please help. 🤔🤔🤔

"tumhari biwi JAM KE mar jaayegi" 

lol idk why that sentence is making me lol. 😂😂😂

why does he care about gauri all of a sudden now? he was perfectly fine leaving her to die/be raped and tortured at kali thakur’s. 😒😒😒

ok fauxlana is LOSING it. 😬😬😬

arre waah, fond flashbacks. apna bhai pighal raha hai. 😏😏😏

ok and what did throwing that bottle even accomplish? also how did fauxlana move before he even threw it, if she was super engrossed in her badle ki bhaavna waala lecture? 😒😒😒

arre idiot, if you had a gun, pehle hi istemaal kar deti uska. 🙄🙄🙄

amazing how both the omkara waala scene and anika waala scene are supposed to be happening in the SAME LOCATION of oberoi mansion (the foyer in front of the main door), but… nope. 😕😕😕

it’s really like they exist in some different realms or something. 😐😐😐

pfffffffft. “angry aur young” hone ka bas tune theka le rakha is ghar mein? 🙄🙄🙄

why did they show a smoking disclaimer when no one is smoking in the scene?? 🤔🤔🤔

heaaaaaaaavvvvy foreshadowing that shivaay isn’t pinky’s beta. 🙈🙈🙈

ouffff oh, this idiot still doesn’t know of mummeh’s involvement. yaaaaaar, by the end of this week at least? please? 😩😩😩

also kaaahe ka mahasangam???? bas IB and DBO ka episode has been edited together into one video instead of two different ones. none of the characters are interacting aapas mein beyond that one oBro scene. the rest of the week better not be like this is2g. 😠😠😠😤😤😤

roleeeeeeeeee playinggggg. againnnnnn. this man is incorrigible. 😏😏😏

bewakoofi toh yeh february se hi dikhaata aa raha hai.  matlab kuch dino ke liye shivaay ki nazar isse hatti, aur isne bas apna hi nahi, SABKI life ki OH MY MAATA kar rakha hai. 😒😒😒

paanch minute? timer says 1 minute and few seconds though? honestly. why wouldn’t you pay attention to shit like this, production team? 😒😒😒

BUAAAAA MAAAA TO THE RESCUE. 👵🏽👵🏽👵🏽

lmao gauri developing freezer burn like she’s a bag of frozen peas. 😂😂😂

WHERE DOES FAUXLANA KEEP PULLING THESE MULTIPLE SYRINGES FROM?????? 😟😟😟

ok the timer on that thing is def broken. 😐😐😐

lmaoooooo fauxlana’s impatience and side-eyeing om’s uselessness is so me. 😂😂😂

ALSO GIRL YES, YOU HAVE A GUN, WHY THE F WOULDN’T YOU JUST SHOOT HER?????? LIKE… 🤔🤔🤔

ABBE OHHHH HERO, APNI BIWI KO BACHA. NOT THIS RANDOM FREEZER GIRL WHO MAY OR MAY NOT BE YOUR FATHER’S MISTRESS. 😑😑😑

… lol whatever om, you think she gives a rat’s ass about you? your ass will die first then. 😂😂😂

JUST SHOOT HIM FAUXLANA! 😫😫😫

lol idek what team i am on anymore. i’m just all the teams i guess lololol. 😂😂😂

LMAOOOOOOO JAANE NAHI DENGE TUJHE AGAIN. THE FUCKKKKK, HOW MANY TIMES WILL THEY USE THIS SONGGGGGGGG? 😅😅😅

they should have just played ‘saathiya’. it’s more hearttttwrenching than this stupid song. 😐😐😐

please note: her freezer burn is magically gone. 😗😗😗

pffffffffft, CPR as kissssss scene is coming up. MAJORRRR eye rolling happening here, but also some involuntary squeeing. because despite all logic and sane thinking, dil toh hai dil, dil ka aitbaaar kya kiiiije. 🤐🤐🤐

lol uske beech mein fauxlana - buamaa theatrics. could you ppl let me focus???? 😑😑😑

lolllllllllll they had time to script and film this with real-lana in the middle of all this. amazing. 😑😑😑 

buamaa toh badi shaatir nikli. maybe shivaay gets it from her? 😊😊😊

oufff oh, iska abhi tak GAURI UTHO GAURI UTHO ka jaap hi chal raha hai. abbe jo karna hai, kissy wissy jo bhi hai, kar na. awaiiii ka time waste. 😒😒😒 

i could be watching shivaay/anika going about their kinky roleplaying in this time. hmph. 😤😤😤

first of all, is om even trained in CPR? like… why does HE have to give it to her? buamaa seems knowledgeable about it, why can’t she do it? 😕😕😕

lmaoooooooooooo omg fauxlana leaning to the side to see better as om approaches gauri. 

when your otp are about to kiss. #relatable 

ok are you ppl aware that the actual important part of CPR is the chest compression bit, not the mouth to mouth? in fact, people who aren’t trained in CPR are recommended to use ONLY chest compressions. 😐😐😐

but i guess asking for a scene for omkara "feeling up” gauri’s boobies (because you know, that’s what this whole scene is all about. the physical intimacy. 😒😒😒) is TOO MUCH for indian television. 

GOD OM DO IT ALREADY. DUS GHANTE LAGAAYEGA KYA? 😤😤😤

fauxlana getting jelly. does she have realllll feelings for omki shomki? girl, you shoulda focused on tapping it when you had the chance, instead of wasting time in all your other udddd-shud harkatein. 🙄🙄🙄

riKara shippers be like AGAIN!!!!!!!! MOAAAAAARRRRRR!!!! 😘😘😘

haaaaaaye, what a sight to wake up. ohhh to be gauriiii kumaaariiii ssssarma in this moment. 😇😇😇

ok my heart is doing tinglyyy things seeing his happy lovesick eyes. what a puppy. despite everything i’ve been yelling at him today, i love this boy so much. my omki shomki. 😍😍😍

heinnnnn, what was he raising his hands up to do? 🤔🤔🤔

yeah that means bye bye time for you now, gauri. 😐😐😐

at least you got two “kisses” out of your time, girl. udhar anika bechaari kabse pyaasi ghoom rahi hai. despite being “real wife” and all that. 😔😔😔

bloody shivaay. kuch seeekh apne chote bhaiyon se. 😒😒😒

… is it necessary to have this conversation IN FRONT OF THE POLICE AND FAUXLANA? 😒😒😒

btw, why are they still here? why hasn’t the police taken her yet? what are they waiting for, christmas? 

om be like “idk having a wife worked out good for shivaay. maybe i should keep this one? 🤔🤔🤔”

HER NAME ISN’T SVETLANA THO? LIKE WHAT IS HER REAL NAMEEEEE????? DOESN’T ANYONE CARE WHY SHE TOOK REAL-LANA’S FACE AND DID ALL THIS???? WHY AREN’T YOU PPL ASKING FOR EXPLANATIONS????????? 😩😩😩

oh hoooooo “kisiiii ne mujhseee kaha tha” and all… 😏😏😏

ok, actually physically dragging her out is unnecessary???? 😕😕😕

why does this girl wear her dupatta like a geriatric watchman wears a kambhal tho? 🙄🙄🙄

ouffff, dialoguebaazi bandh kar aur chalta ban. awaiiii ka naatak. 😒😒😒

god shrenu is soooo fucking pretty though. i can’t handle just how pretty she is. 😍😍😍

lmaoooo, gauri’s managed to get on bade bhaiyya’s radar. 😄😄😄 bade bhaiyya’s gonna make errrrything alrightttttt! #championOfOberoiBahus 😊😊😊

[todisturbtheuniverse]

“Fic authors self rec! When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you’ve written, then pass on to at least five other writers.”

Tagged by @montpahrnah; thanks! <3 (Even though it’s a million years later...sorry, everyone who’s tagged me in something. I swear I’m actually getting to it.) This was...a challenge. I’m going through one of those dumb phases where I feel like I’ll never be able to write a fic I want to post ever again (even though I JUST posted something a month ago? Brain, chill) so this was a nice hard look at trying to see what I actually like about my writing.

Edit: Tagging @servantofclio, @hollyand-writes, @ferociousqueak, @commander-diomika, @continuousspec, and anyone else who wants to tbh--I’ve been mostly off of Tumblr this past week and have no idea who has or hasn’t done it, so here’s an open door, and absolutely don’t feel obligated!

A Slash of Red - f!Hawke/Isabela, 21k, M  

For once I’m going to choose this, rather than A Slash of Blue, because while ASOB was ~50 days of me slowly embracing not just a weird, abbreviated writing style but also the much-compressed fact that I could in fact love a woman romantically, ASOR was a love letter, the most wonderful love letter I’ve ever written or ever will, I think. (Full disclosure: I don’t write many love letters.) The more time that passes between when I initially knew and loved DA2, the more I question about its actual intricacies. This is true of most fiction I consume. I get caught up in wondering if the writers really meant these subtleties of character depth or if they were happy accidents, as if the worth of them can be determined by the answer to this question. ASOR embraced everything I thought I knew and loved and understood about Isabela, poured through those glimpses and flashes and illuminated them, all the good and the bad in what I hope was equal measure. When I reread it I remember loving something because of what I saw in it, what I made of its potential, not because of what someone else put into it, and I think that’s worth something--though I sometimes forget.

Wall Yourself Away - f!Trevelyan/Iron Bull, 25k, E  

I had waited so long to write what amounted to a ~25K word fic. I’d planned it for over a year. I’d waffled about it because--while I tend to really like reading and hearing about other OCs--I assumed that no one would really want to read this much backstory about Kat. Like, half backstory, at least, where the backstory actually enters the story itself in secondary OC form. But I decided, whatever, I want to write it, because Kat is my ugly duckling OC. She has none of Hawke’s fabulous hair or terrible humor and instead a caricature of all my crappier personality traits, like crippling fear of change and general social anxiety and insecurity in all relationships at all times. Finally getting to write about her, getting exactly what she wants by just gritting her teeth and muscling through--by accepting that she has a bit of bravery to her when it counts--was fucking great.

Event Horizon - Aria T’Loak/Nyreen Kandros, 14k, M  

Ugh, this is a hard one to talk about. I wanted a canon-compliant story that showed Nyreen and Aria--individually and together--through a gaze that wasn’t Shepard’s. Especially how Nyreen came to be with Aria, in all the ways she did. Obviously the most awful part of making it canon-compliant is that at the end, Nyreen still dies. At the time, my mom had just passed away, and while I did not grieve her per se, I grieved possibilities. If she was still alive there’s a high chance that our relationship would be even worse than it was then--it was drifting toward no-contact, definitely--but as long as she lived there was also technically a non-zero chance that she would stop being a totally horrible person and start actually trying to make things up to me. I kind of felt this both ways with Nyreen and Aria: Nyreen knows that ultimately their relationship is doomed, but waffles on torpedoing it while there’s still a tiny chance, even if it means sacrificing some morals; Aria loved Nyreen, in my opinion, but she loved power/control more, and it’s only after she’s lost both of those things with real finality that there’s a possibility for her growth to move in a different direction. It was a challenging fic. But I got paired with a fantastic artist (@laur-rants) and it was overall a really cathartic bit of writing.

When You Fall - f!Hawke/Isabela, 4k, T 

I wanted to leave Hawke in the Fade, but I didn’t want her to die. (Sometimes I wanted her to die, but only when I was feeling really morose and not myself.) My Hawke had particularly strong friendships with Aveline, Merrill, Bethany, and Varric, on top of Isabela; I wanted to showcase that, that she hadn’t just been herding cats for six years but that she meant as much to all of them as they meant to her (not that she’d ever say so, the jerk), and that they also mean just as much to each other. I loved writing this; it was meant to be very short, less than a thousand words, but it was one of those stories that just told itself naturally to me without much planning.

Promising -  f!Adaar/Josephine Montilyet, 12k, G

Anytime I reread this I get a little sad that I lost momentum and didn’t add much more to the series, but. I love it for what it is, which is basically the height of what my fic has become lately: those little missing moments in between the big conversations, which are big in their own way, that add context and nuance to characters and their relationships. And it’s really fucking sweet, tbh. I hope someday I get back to Adaar and Josephine.

[hmpygssy]

I dare you to pick either the Sondheim asks or the Shakespeare asks and answer all of them. You don't have to answer the weird sexual ones for the Sondheim if you don't want to, though

1: Least favorite thing about your favorite SS showPassion, that a lot of people unfairly dismiss it2: Favorite thing about your least favorite SS showI know roadshow least so let's go w that... I think it does a really good job at compressing the lives of the characters, also Weidman's books are always so singular I love it 3: Best SS characterBuddy Plummer4: Worst characterToby Sweeney Todd 5: Favorite collaboratorLapine6: Best book of a SS show. Why?I'm gonna throw a curb ball here and say Forum... that Shows Fucking Hilarious 7: Worst book....Company 8: Erase one show and all its traces from SS's canon (question courtesy of @non-binary-sally-bowles)Merrily. Then I wouldn't have to be sad about those kids and worried about my future bc of the documentary9: If he ever jumped the shark, what show is emblematic of that?Either bunuel sucks or he never lost his magic 10: Favorite bitchy momentWhen he sent Mandy patinkin an angry letter for writing notes in the front row at the first preview of assassins 11: Who would SS marry as part of a sham marriage?Obviously lee remick12: Thoughts on the book to FolliesDepends on which one we're talking about here. I think it's Generally Good but it really depends on the production13: Make one edit to SS show xxxPacific overtures, take out there is no other way, so only I could listen to it for the rest of my life 14: What would SS do to you in the sex dungeon?Whip me for saying I prefer Evita to Sweeney todd15: Cast Patti in a role she hasn't done yetSarah Jane Moore16: Which Tony would you take awayI would take away company's best musical score and give it to Sunday 17: Novel/book/play SS should adaptEva Peron's biography 18: Favorite quoteAnything you do let it come from you then it will be new 19: Desert island song (singular)Now/later/soon20: On a scale of 1-10, with 1 being Foxy Sondheim and 10 being the Virgin Mary, rate how good of a mother Rose is421: What's your gimmick?Y'all know my gimmick (e***** a**)22: Nervous breakdown song that best represents your last mental breakdownThe god-why-don't-you-love-me blues23: Has SS ever written a true love song?If we're countin this show, then Maria from west side story24: SS sex jamPlease hello25: SS funeral jamScary Sweeney a little priest26: SS wedding dance songYou're gonna love tomorrow/love will see us through... I love Irony27: Toss in the trash- his music or his lyricsLyrics. Sondheim overtures fuck me up every time 28: Which SS do you perform in front of crowdEvery single one of them29: Which SS song replaces Don't Cry for Me, Argentina in Evita?Unworthy of your love, the first verse is Eva singing to argentina, second verse is singing to peron30: Choose a ALW song to replace Color and Light in SITPWGI don't know how to love him, george and dot sing it to each other 31: Which Brecht play does SS adapt at gunpointMother courage 32: SS's current thoughts on Lady GagaShe should be in the Sweeney Todd revival... as the pie33: What pastry do you order at Mahler's?The symphony 534: What would Oscar have made of Follies?I think he would've liked it, esp. if he could compare it's failure to allegro's35: FMK: SS, Hal Prince, and James LapineF lapeen m Sondheim k Hal prince36: Is SS a sub or dom?You know the answer to this question you absolute buffoon37: Miscast BernadetteReciter in pacific overtures 38: Miscast Elaine StritchJohanna 39: ALW goes missing and SS offers you some pie. Do you eat it?I want Andrew Lloyd Webber inside me40: What do you order at Mrs. Lovett's?The beast41: Is Road Show an unappreciated masterpiece or a lesser entry in the SS canon?The latter 43: Which American president do you cast as Bobby? Georges? Sally? Fosca?Bobby is obviously JFK, George is Nixon, sally is carter (bens the peanut farm), fosca is 44: Other than Rose, who is the most Shakespearian character?All of Sweeney todd's victims are just like tamora's kids in Titus andronicus 45: That Frank or Rich and Happy?Rich and happy duh46: Rob Marshall-ize a SS showNo way fuck you 47: Which show is most problematic ®Sweeney todd's depiction of mental illness (Toby) is Yikes 48: Most Sobdhemian Seth Rogen movie?When you think about it Sausage party is the exact same thing as do I hear a waltz 49: Who would play SS on SNL?50: Does Bobby find happiness by age 50?Bobby is dead by 50 51: Tumblr user most likely to be the man himselfRobert 52: A SS show you seem to forget existsThe frogs