#edit: the Blaze icon on this post is funny to me LMAO

[nyctoheart]

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I have written and deleted this like 3 times now...

I really hate that more and more signs point to tumblr regaining its initial purist community. I think more of them remained on tumblr than people think, but tumblr still chilled out lately while twitter is... well it's called The Twitter Mob for a reason.

idk like.... I'm just not dealing with online purists anymore. I've just about done the OPPOSITE of what they wanted, and I've learned to put my faith and time into non-judgmental people who don't give a fuuuuck, over people who point fingers and yell at each other.

And I think a lot of my thought process stems from the fact that I left the Salvation fucking Army. Where I had to hear "this person is doing something wrong" when they weren't, or "this person should be ashamed" when they shouldn't. And how the conservative church and the terminally-online purist culture have the same exact reasoning, they just don't want to admit it. How they both blow things WAYYY out of proportions with delusional reasoning and echo chambers. Just the ironic similarities between these two groups that claim to be so opposite... it's a sick joke by the universe to me.

edit: in fact if ANYTHING. the salvation army was KINDER to people. that's the REAL fucking irony lmao. At least some old lady in a uniform would sit down and talk to you in private, and not publicly yell at you for clout

I just want to be somewhere where its okay to not be perfect. it's okay to have flaws. to make jokes about your darkness, but still be kind and compassionate to the person next to you who has their own darkness. I have a small circle of friends like that and I am just so fucking thankful for them, because they ARE some of the nicest people I've ever met.

I think overall I'm just really anxious about tumblr becoming the next Twitter Mob, because yes tumblr was awful a few years back, but the monster just like grew and amplified on twitter. and I my mentally can't afford to have that return to tumblr.

And how I can't private this blog because it's a primary one... like that feature really sucks. I've wanted to private this blog ever since I changed my url, and I think it would help a lot with this anxiety that's growing on me.