#edit: in hindsight i want to put a tw on *this* but i'm not sure what. creative guilt? augh. it's in the ask itself so i can't even hide it

[starflungwaddledee]

I have to ask you a question, I'm sorry it's just that you seem like a nice person and I don't want you to get seriously upset by what I'm going to say and I don't mean this whole thing to be negative.

With all of that out of the way: why do people like to make angsty stuff so much. Like I get it, it's to make aus or even have hcs about those said characters. But I have seen people who make angsty stuff and never continue their work about said angsty stuff and said people who said that the angsty stuff was going to have a happy ending never came though, it's just disheartening to see and just to see that whole bandee getting turned into Morpho thing basically reminded me of that. :/

Look I'll say this with an open heart, I tolerate angsty stuff and for those who make it to have character development or even tell stories and to help people explain hcs about certain characters, I can totally respect and understand. Sometimes we don't have to make happy stuff, sometimes we need to have a story to be told and such, and I wish you the best of luck with your whole bandee au.

Then again I'm very very very sorry for what I said and I hope you can forgive me for that. :[

hey there! I'm not upset by this at all, it seems like an honest question and i will take it in good faith. but it has an extremely simple answer: people generally make content because they enjoy it.

you can also make content for money, or because you think it will do well on social media when you crave ~*~The Numbers~*~ (most of us are at least a little guilty of this). but in terms of a question like this:

"why make that sort of content?" it's because we enjoy it.

why people enjoy angst and its contingents (dark stories, violence, drama, tragedy, etc) is extremely individual. it's like asking why someone likes any genre or any trope, or hell, any flavour in food, any animal, any hobby!

it can be confusing or hurtful when someone doesn't like something that you think is cool and exciting and perfect in every way; and it can be even more confusing- or even scary- when someone likes something you really really don't like.

but, and this is something which I think tends to come with age, it can also be very liberating! someone liking or disliking something in contrast to you is not remotely a bad thing!! it doesn't mean that you are wrong for not liking it, or that they are wrong for genuinely enjoying it*. you're just different; and that's cool and exciting!

because you asked me, i can tell you why I personally like angst:

⬇️ continued under the cut. not because of any content warnings, just because it's long. i also address the comment about discontinued work. ⬇️

I like to write drama and angst and put characters into the proverbial blender because:

I like to see characters be unfathomably and inspirationally strong in the face of incredible adversity. I like to see characters go absolutely insane trying to save their loved ones because they cannot imagine a worse fate than that loved one not being with them. I like to see characters fight and fight and fight for the better world that they know they deserve, that their loved ones deserve, and to never give up on each other even when things look absolutely hopeless. I like to see characters hit the despair event horizon; to realise everything is lost, that they've made a mistake, that they'll never get back from this-- and then to do it anyway. and at the end of it, I like to see those characters be happy; to see them comforted and recover and cry with relief because they made it, despite everything.

for that reason, angst and tragedy and drama hits a niche for me that can't be filled by fluff alone. i can write the characters being happy much more easily than writing a whole other plotline. but i like to see them be happy despite everything that tried to prevent them being happy, first.

many folks probably like it for other reasons. and not everybody who likes angst likes happy endings; tbh that hits a different spot of catharsis too! heck, not all of my endings are happy, but most of them are because i find it a bit more personally rewarding!

as for artists or creators who started a work and never finished it; i'm sorry, it sucks when you're invested in something and you don't see the finale. but please, don't hold it against any of those creators or conflate them not providing a happy ending with failure. it probably hurt them greatly to have to give up on telling a story they clearly cared about enough to start and share in the first place. art and storytelling (especially when you are providing it all from the heart for free on social media) is extremely hard work- whether it be fic, art, or sequential comics- and the ability to do it can leave you at any time without warning.

all of this said; if you personally don't like angst, I actually already content warn for it on my work! you can block this tag >> cw angst << or any of my specific AU tags if one is worse for you than the others.

or, perhaps my art just isn't for you! if you don't enjoy my content and are only 'tolerating it', then there's nothing making you look at it. you can either blacklist my tags, or block my account so that none of it shows up on your timeline. I'll continue to draw what I enjoy, and that will include my AUs (including the angsty ones), so if you don't want to see them i suggest you do whatever you need to cultivate your online space accordingly!

anyway, this was long, but i wanted to give you the time of day anon, because you seem genuine. and maybe you haven't had the chance to learn some of these things yet, so i hope you'll find some of this a little helpful! i will say, however: i've seen asks like this sent in to people in much worse faith. i'm going to make abundantly clear that i won't tolerate that here or give the time of day to any rude behaviour. liking or disliking angst/tragedy/whatever does not and never will make you morally superior than the next person; it's just a matter of a variety of personal taste.

and we're all different. and that's cool and exciting!

*i'm putting this here as an important footnote, but i obviously don't mean shit that is objectively harmful or intentionally malicious. i do also think that as online creators, especially in a shared space like a fandom, it's important to listen to tag requests and to cw appropriately for all sorts of things. i myself only just learned that people need warnings for eyes and eye contact! i expect people to cultivate their own online experience, but i also expect this to be made easy and facilitated by comprehensive and considerate tagging and respect of boundaries. i'm still learning but i'll always do my best to tag appropriately!

[spiritblossoming]

daily fun but useless ppau fact #10

aka "EVERY JOKE/EASTER EGG IN ONE DAY YOU'LL WISH YOU HADN'T"

I'm putting it under a read more because it's long af (because... my dumbass.... makes a lot of jokes. if u didn't notice.)

chapter one: wish (soraka r)

“Not a single sign that the Rift’s champions, those gods amongst men, had ever been there at all.”

This was a vague reference to Damwon’s championship skins where they had wanted to appear as gods coming down from the heavens, if I remember correctly.

-

“And Faker would never be enough of a fool to trust someone who once lived in his shadow.”

Faker is (kind of) Zed in this au, so this is secretly a joke. ha ha.

chapter two: you and me (yuumi w) (get it? because meiko's skin is yuumi? i'm not funny ahahahah)

“Hmm,” Jiejie begins, his eyes wandering as he thinks. “I think Meiko would have wished for something to make him an even better support than he already is. Viper probably wished that he’d never miss a shot, and Flandre definitely wished for some magic that’s better than that smoke thing he does. That, or to be able to do this his entire life. Who knows?”

Two out of three isn't bad :)

-

“But Jiejie,” Scout says, intentionally mispronouncing his name. “How can you even be tired?”

I explained this in the end notes already, but Scout pronounces Jiejie’s name like 姐姐, which means older sister. Credit to my friend that only referred to Jiejie as “big sister” all throughout Worlds 2021. Bro is gonna fail Chinese III.

-

“Breathe, Yechan. Breathe.”

I’m pretty sure Scout is the only one to be referred to by his real name by his teammates, if you don’t count the introductions in the first EG fic. Generally, I try to avoid their real names, since it starts to feel a bit awkward once I’m writing about Ryu Minseok and not Keria or something. It’s too personal for me.

(Edit a few days later: I forgot about Miky but c’mon, I was not about to refer to him as “Mikyx” the entire fic)

(Edit a few more days later: Gumayusi got full name’d, shit is going down)

(Edit a few more more days later: everyone getting full name'd now this is not a drill)

-

quick tw for death but when my mom was crying to me about her dad's last wishes i. i kind of. i kind of went "AYO WHAT DID I HAVE MEIKO DO IN ODYWYH TO COMFORT SCOUT I NEED TO KNOW" and just tried to channel whatever he did

im that emotionally constipated kill me

chapter three: end of the line (graves q)

“He plays Teamfight Tactics until he sees stars when he blinks.”

Perhaps in this universe Riot Games is truly a small indie company…

-

“Scout tries to scream, but without the room to expand his chest, all that comes out is the faintest whine.”

This was tested to make sure it was an accurate depiction. I got sleep paralysis once when my sister was audibly on a call in the room over. I tried to scream. Didn’t work. The sound I made was actually very embarrassing. (it is ok to laugh at me for my sleep paralysis experiences. they are funny in hindsight. for more tips on how to handle sleep paralysis just hmu)

-

“We’ll go to Europe, then. I’ve heard there’s a retired Summoner that can suppress someone’s abilities. Maybe he’ll be able to suppress the Rift’s blessing as well.”

Some of you (by which i mean aryasage) caught it already, but this is a reference to Caedrel. In a different version, Scout’s response is, “No, he’ll just cancel it.”

chapter four: moonlight vigil (aphelios r)

“He’s not stupid—he knows what sleep deprivation does to people. (He’s read the Russian sleep experiment creepypasta, after all.)”

Somehow I doubt he would have been able to get his hands on that one, but whatever. Either way it’s kind of terrifying, and if it was true, this fic would go in a very different direction. Would not recommend it if you're scared easily or if you spend too much time thinking about everything that could go wrong.

-

“Telling the whole story to the rest of his team is quite possibly the hardest thing Scout’s ever done, if he ignores the past week or so.”

-

“You look like shit.”

In a different version, Scout absolutely snaps at Jiejie and then proceeds to verbally and emotionally obliterate him. I kind of wish I had been able to keep it in, since I thought it was kind of fun in a “haha angst goes brrr” kind of way, but it didn’t really fit in with the rest of the chapter.

-

“Scout sniffs, gratefully accepting the tissue someone hands him. He’s been going through a lot of those lately, despite it being November.”

Is there even a no-nut November equivalent in China??? Either way I thought I was hilarious in the moment.

-

“Forcibly inducing sleep (aka punching Scout in the head) is out too once Viper mentions brain damage, even if Meiko insists he can fix it.”

They don’t test this theory, but Meiko is 100% confident that his magic can repair brain damage. In the end, they decide it’s not worth finding out.

ppau leak: this comes up later

-

I spent thirty minutes googling how to meditate just to write this chapter. Worth.

-

“Scout tries to respond. His body doesn’t move an inch. Somewhat deliriously, he imagines himself as a meme. Aw, shit. Here we go again.”

-

‘“You need to relax.” Jiejie leans forward, holding two fingers to Scout’s head. “And trust me. Do you trust me?”’

Jiejie quotes Evelynn here for no other reason than He Can.

chapter five: harrowed path (viego e)

“Forgiveness is a bitch, and so am I.”

My English teacher wouldn’t let me use this line in my personal essay, so I put it here instead.

-

“It’s then that Scout realizes they’ve been moved from the couch to someone’s room, where two twin beds have been haphazardly shoved close to each other.”

no homo [lolrpf shippers I'm looking at u.]