#edit from future me: help why did I make their eyes so big. wtf.

[wildtornado-o]

Doodles from today :3 No matter how many times I draw Little I'm always going to end up changing Something

(Last one is a scene from the fic somewhere between midnight and dawn by @a-pepper-honey it's a rlly good fic I Love Possessive Little djsjsk, Granby and his protective guys)

[sly-merlin]

killing me- 9

pairing : law student!reader + yuta

genre :    angst , mafia au/ arranged marriage au , smut

warnings of this chapter : smut, drinking ,mention of weapons

words :: 7k

summary : “life’s never fair y/n. realise it as soon as you can . it is the only secret for living a regretless life.”                                  

or              

                    “  curiousity got the cat hitched”

taglist :: (not tagging the old ones because they have read it already bt if u want , lemme know! )  @yiyi4657​ @sorrywonwoo​ @sillywinnergladiator​​ @suhweo​​ @exfolitae​ @minejungwoo​ @leesalts​  @mal-nakamoto23​ @ro2424​

@kafenetwork​​​​ @neowritingsnet​​​​

K.M masterlist

K.M 8  next

note:: unedited! i’m a bit busy so i’ll try to edit it before sleep!

“yuta.”

“bake up.”

Yuta groaned at the foreign force shaking him repeatedly. He moved, crashing his face further into the sheets, swatting the alien hands away from himself.

“wake up you horse!” this time yuta heard the gurgling voice a bit more clearly. Someone was trying to disturb his sleep. Staying on his stomach and titling his half body to face the uninvited guest, he made out a face that matched johnnys. His face fell flat on the mattress again until he realised what or whom he has seen! He jolted upright, squatting, to face johnny.

“what are you doing here.” He mumbled with eyes still closed, stretching his arms on the sheets.

“it’s 1p.m!why you still sleeping dude?” johnny’s exasperated voice sounded too loud to yuta’s morning self. Or afternoon!

“It’s m-” a long yawn stretched his mouth into an oval shape, that he didn’t mind covering “its my house. I’ll do whatever I want but what are you even doing here?” he completed quietly.

“why are you still sleeping. You weren’t even drunk. Get up and tell me where is y/n!”

“so you are not here for me!” yuta pouted at johnny before throwing himself on the bed again, covering himself with sheets.

“what the fuck yuta! You are not a baby and tell me where is she? Did you even drive her back?” johnny asked sternly, removing his layer of protection.

“the only thing I can assure is that I wanna sleep more. And about your big fat crush! She certainly came back with me but she was crying so I won’t be surprised if she left already.” As soon as yuta’s almost inaudible words reached johnny’s ears, he jogged outside the room, checking the lock of your room. He sighed in relief at the secured lock. You didn’t leave and he was glad.

Johnny noticed your movements when you signed those papers. He was cursing at himself for not interfering but not like it’d have made any difference! The best he could do was to make sure you were fine at the end. Regardless of the fact that your phone was switched off, he was trying it continuously since yesterday night. Countless phone calls and messages but all were futile. His anger on taeyong was just fuelling by your ignorance.

Annoyingly, he fisted his hair before going for yuta’s room again.

“is she in university right now?” he asked yuta, who was looking like a dead body with an open mouth.

“bloody hell nakamoto! Wake up!” he shouted at him, this time the sheets were tossed on the floor.

“johnny babes, just track her. Don’t shout at me. I didn’t do anything this time.”

“you seriously ate your ethics yuta. I’m not needed there so I’m staying until she’s back.” Johnny declared, making his way outside on the couches.

“not needed my ass john suh. Ate my ethics! Says the one who’s seducing his own sister-in-law.” He only muttered before drifting back into paradise.

johnny just sat there in front of the t.v, mindlessly waiting for you, unknown guilt corroding his mind and heart.

***************

Doyeon and mingi’s whispering felt like a hammer to your head. The incessant pounding was the result of some expensive alcohol and the stupid tears. If exams were not approaching in two weeks, you’d have stayed longer to sulk but their future was as important as yours and only one more week was left so you just sucked it up. Now you were eating the lunch brought by mingi while testing them for exam.

“civil laws suck.” Mingi exclaimed, hitting doyeon on the arm.

“no! your brain sucks.” Doyeon reiterated, poking his head with her pencil.

“wtf doyie! My brain is totally packed up to the brim. if you love it so much, then tell me the answer of question 6!” a smug smile made its way to mingi’s lips.

“what’s wrong with no.6 mingi?” you questioned, perplexed as there was no difficulty in the paper yet he was still looking here and there.

“umm. Non bis in idem! It’s not given anywhere. Right?” he hesitantly asked for he knew he was wrong, somewhere.

“what was the paper you wrote last time?” you tried not to unleash your anger on them, so you kept your voice as low as possible.

“double jeopardy!”

“and?”

“and?”

“what the heck mingi! Didn’t you mention the legal maxim of dj?”

“maybe not!”

“what kind of law student forgets about legal maxims duffus! Non bis in idem means double jeopardy.” You reprimanded him tiredly, not in the mood to put up much fight with him.

“sorry” he said, head hung low.

“don’t be mingi. I won’t gain anything from this. you need to study for yourself. now complete this before I give you a subjective test. Double prep is always good. Hurry up!”

A collective musical groan leaves them both, as they tend to their paper again, you drowning yourself in your own books.

*******************

Johnny and yuta were engrossed in a football match when you entered the hallway. Upon noticing you, johnny sighed in disbelief, before making his way to you.

“why is your phone switched off?” he fumed at you, hands on his waist as you poured water for yourself.

“It wasn’t charged so I left it here.” he knew he wasn’t doing his utmost in containing his irritation and your casual tone just took him off guard.

“you jus- you should have charged it dammit. I was fucking worried that something happened to you and what kind of girl travels without a phone these days!” his hand ruined his already messy hair as he ranted, the reason of which was beyond your understanding.

“it’s not that big of an issue besides I’m not clearly out of reach right!” you scoffed at him, pointing to your arm where the bracelet was hidden, under the sleeves. You didn’t mean to sound rude at his concern but his position was no better .You had every right to be querulous!

“i-you don’t understand. i just wanted a reply from you. it’s the least I deserve! Or don’t i?” his voice went down as his face lost the previous stern expression.

“I saw my phone only this morning and I was getting late so didn’t bother!” you shrugged your shoulders at him, making your way for the room.

“where are you going?” his voice rose a bit as he held onto your arm.

“in my room!” you replied, matter of factly.

“yeah! I thought you were going to greet your dear husband!” he joked, tilting his head towards the couches where yuta sat previously but he was not there anymore.

“I don’t wanna talk johnny!” you said curtly, jerking your hand away. But he was quicker as he pulled you into him, backing you into a counter.

“just leav-

“no tell me what’s the matter with you. what have I even done?” his voice was barely above a whisper, meant only to be heard by you. the rise and fall in his speech was already shaking your resolution.

“nothing! just turned a normal student into a deadly underground member. But it’s nothing big so yeah!” you replied, mock evident in your words. As you tried to leave again, his hands caught your waist as he picked you up, stationing you on the counter. He secured you against his body, restricting your movements. His hard orbs found yours as he hands tightened around your waist, making you gulp in the process. You stared back with same intensity, as if reading his next step. He lowered his front, demanding eyes never leaving yours,

“this is the first and last time I’ll be explaining myself. I don’t know a shit about why he did that. But those papers won’t be used against you. I won’t let that happen. Ever. I promise that with my life. Just have some faith in me” He whispered. Besides it being the precise validation you sought, suspicion couldn’t be helped!

“and why would you do that. Do you also have some hidden agen-

his lips felt soft as they collided with yours with urgent need to shut you up. You froze, so did he. The only movement in your control was of your hands that were tightly gripped to the counter. The silence in the air being tense, his lips stayed still and contrary to yours, his eyes were completely shut. Johnny’s light breaths fanned your upper lip as his chest heaved up and down. Neither of you made any effort to further it nor any to pull apart. Few more seconds passed and he finally detached himself, the bodies still connected. Your lashes fluttered as he palmed your left cheek, speaking in a low husky whisper.

“I promise. Just believe me and when I say taeyong won’t hurt you, I mean it. With all my heart. Can you trust me on this please?”

He was insisting yet pleading and you merely nodded, lowering your head. His delicate fingers brushed the line formed between your brows, smiling softly.

“you have nothing to worry about. with unparalleled record that we have! You ain’t getting rid of me anytime soon. Yeah?”

His breathy laugh tingled your insides and something like awe transformed his face as he felt the warmness of your cheeks under his hand.

“by any chance, are you flustered?” your face went blank at his shameless comment when he was the very reason for your current state.

“n-no!” you pushed him hard while standing straight. He staggered a bit, giggling uncontrollably at you.

“lying suits you y/n. just like your soulmate jaehyun.” You scrunched your nose at the mention.

“don’t talk about him! He’s so annoying, i’m gonna hang him upside down someday o-or turn him into a stew!”

“and feed him to yuta!” he completed. You gawked at him for a moment before joining him in his laughing session.

“there is food?” yuta entered the kitchen, dimming the commotion.

“not for you!” you snarked.

“we have food y/n?” it was johnny this time. you had almost forgot about the sandwiches that were now probably rotting in your bag. As realisation dawned, you hurriedly retrieved your bag from counter, opening the plastics from the sandwiches with a last hope to save them.

“do you know that you don’t have to be ramsey to stuff cucumber and tomatoes in a bread?” johnny shifted, taking the packages to heat them up.

“I was out of bread. So I just took the easy route.”

“lame excuse! Work better!”

“not everyone got time john!”

You strolled for your room, passing yuta in the way, totally missing the frown and cute smile on yuta and johnny respectively. Though yuta’s internals were screaming at him to open his shitty mouth, his main focus was on his empty stomach that was growling like never before.

“pass me one john!” he whisper yelled to johnny, purposely stretching the last word to satisfy himself.

“no! it’s her lunch or snack or whatever it is.” He warned, hiding the oven with his front.

“oh so you have turned a part time servant for her!” he spewed, crossing his arms against his chest.

“no dude. She’s actual-

he was about to tell yuta but he halted his train of words for he was not in the place to tell any of your secrets to anyone , especially yuta.

“she’s what? Your girlfriend?”

“I swear I’m gonna fry you someday!”

“whatever. Now give me a sandwich before she comes out. Hurry up!” yuta looked over johnny’s shoulders to count the stacked portion in the device.

“one, two-

“three. They are just three yuta! Fuck off.” Johnny knew throwing abuses wouldn’t work but hitting him with his shoulder wasn’t either! He glanced at yuta and he seriously looked miserable. Hungry miserable!

“come on-

“are you done john?” your voice echoed from the hall as you approached wearing your famous tank top and cotton shorts. Yuta cursed under his breath, opening the fridge to get himself something.

“here” johnny handed you the plate. He hit yuta’s arm to grab his attention who was practically trying to sit in the fridge.

“renjun and jaemin are cooking their special ramyeon. We’ll eat there, come on!”

“huh!” he excitedly passed johnny to pick his things up.

With yuta out of sight, his focus shifted again on you. “don’t you get sick after eating takeouts?”

“yup I do! My gut is not the healthiest one in the world. But I’ve fewer options and I do check their health certificates so no need to worry.” Your humorous reply didn’t get more than a shit face from him. He leaned again causing you to take a step backwards.

“your hair!” He pointed and you rolled your eyes like you’d see what was happening up there.

“what my hair?”

“umm. Nothing kiddo!” he said before ruffling your hair.

“aah. I’m not a kid johnny!” you shouted at him though he was just standing by your shoulder.

“oh yes you are!” he pouted dramatically and ran but not forgetting to throw a flying kiss your way. “charge your phone, I’ll call again.”

“eww!” you snapped your head to catch yuta standing behind, making faces at johnny who was standing at the front of hallway.

“oh come on you shit.”

At johnny’s comment , yuta just followed and you totally missed the way he scoffed at both of you.

****************

You were truly jumbled by johnny’s actions, innocent yet calculated. You had maintained your calm but he was aware that you were not blind towards his growing attraction. why didn’t you push him away! What was he aiming at? Questions, questions! From the very first day, all you have are questions with no concrete answers.

But Johnny was not the sole occupier of your worries, taeyong held a significant part of it. If what johnny said was true, if his intentions were not so malafide then he’d easily have skipped it. Despite johnny’s assurance, you couldn’t afford trusting him anymore. Not like you could protect yourself from losing anything but your walls would always be enclosed for him.

Your wandering mind was pulled back into reality by a message from your classmate. The date of thesis topic submission was moved to an earlier one, a week earlier to be specific. In reality, you were all starting it a few months earlier just so the pressure could be minimised but it instead felt like a strategy for your doom. You all were supposed to submit the topic and a little introduction even before the qualification exam! And obviously you were behind the so called ahead-of-time schedule. You could have wrote a ph.d worthy book on mafia and their ploys but sadly criminal law was not the option available for it. So that’s how you ended up in the small balcony, sitting on the cold floor, enjoying the evening cool breeze. Search results on both naver and google had varied from “50 best topics of dissertation in international law” to “how to know what is my area of interest?” but every try had gone to a blank page.

************

By late evening, you got bored of sitting in the balcony and room, so you decided to study with a change of setting and the only place available apart from your room was the hall. After computing various possibilities, you dragged the single seater towards the hall windows and angling the book on the window still, a much comfy makeshift study space was ready. With the newfound determination to complete the task at hand, your eyes browsed every means of information to stumble upon anything you missed earlier, ignoring the blue skies switching to the darker ones.

***********

Yuta noticed the way he was experiencing more fatigue as the days passed by. He never trained this much until he was suspended. He looked forward for it to end so he could feel the same thrill again but two weeks wouldn’t just pass in a blink! He claimed the basement as his new home trying to ignore the activities transpiring upstairs. The desire to stay with his dear roommate jungwoo was irrepressible but his ego didn’t allow him to give in so easily. He wanted to show his anger to taeyong and that was the only reason he found himself coming back to the new home more often.

He languidly passed the kitchen to use the washroom. Only when he was about to enter his room, he noticed the lightening in the kitchen and living room. He groaned at the thought of your imprudent habit of multiplying the electricity bill which eventually he had to pay! Or maybe you were just trying to instigate him! When he was about to put out the lights, he spotted the sofa and a pair of legs perched on the widow still. He took light steps to reach your sleeping figure and suddenly he felt his annoyance melting into astonishment. Your face was covered with the open, visibly heavy hardcover book whilst your half body was on the seat and half in the air with feet placed on the window still for balance that was clearly very very comfortable place for napping at midnight. unconsciously, his hand extended for the book and as he picked it up, you stirred. Panic took over him as he lost the hold leading the book to fell on your face instead. He ducked, cupping his mouth with both hands to stifle the laugh that was about to escape. Luckily you were dead to the world. Hearing no movement, he crawled for the room , getting up only when he was at a safe distance. Without wasting another moment, he did what he was there for in the first place and went to sleep, with a thumping heart that was probably due to the initial dread he felt or that’s what he thought!

**********

The bus stop being far away, you began the long trudge for neos’ house. Taeil had requested your presence two days ago , but being too busy with studying on the first few days of the week ,it was delayed. You’d have never accepted the offer if it was taeyong but taeil suggested you to take your time even though what he wanted to ask or said was important. His readiness to prioritise your convenience warmed you and it were the emotions of the moment that you agreed to him. And now the heat was burning your exposed legs and you were cursing his sweet tongue.

You knocked on the opened door to announce your arrival despite the fact that the main door had automatically detected you to lead you in. you stood there like a statue, moving your neck like an owl, waiting for an invitation but nothing. you banged it again only to hear someone’s cursing from inside.

“who the fuck knocks when it’s op-

A screeched scream met your ears as a man came into your sight. He abruptly started bowing, apologising profusely.

“I’m so sorry noona. I didn’t mean to! I’m sorry. This won’t happen again. I-

“hey, it’s totally fine. I didn’t even hear you in the first place.” You lied, saving him the mortification.

“can I come in?”

“this is your own place. You don’t need to ask or knock noona!” you entered as he gestured you to sit.

“can you call tae-

But before you could say it, he ran inside. You didn’t know or remembered his name but his face looked familiar. Maybe he was sicheng or hyuck or someone else cause you were sure you had met hyuck before!

“I was making coffee for taeil hyung. But he’s late so it’s yours now!” he exclaimed with his eye smile. it was cute and friendly.

“what was your name again?” you asked smiling back at him, noticing the little red on his neck.

“jeno.” He immediately settled on a seat, his focus fixed on you. “I’m making snacks. Do you wanna join?”

You chuckled at his innocent suggestion, “If you meant joining for eating, then I’m all in but if you want my help in actual process, then you’d die hungry today!”

“I’m aware of that but you are never late to learn anything right!”

“wow. Your enthusiasm is admirable but I don’t wanna burn your kitchen.” Your eyes were blessed with another series of his eye smile. it was contagious.

“you are here!” you saw taeil sprinting towards you.

“I’m sorry. I got caught up in the office.” His words came out breathy as he was still panting from the jog.

“no worries but I don’t have much time. I have to study for exams.”

“yes, studying is important.” He nodded before requesting jeno to get him the coffee and water, to which the boy grumpily complied.

“why the fuck is air con off! I’m gonna roast!” He whined and got up again to close the front door.

“now. I’ve two things to tell you or rather order you. you wanna eat first orr-

“no I’m fine really. Just tell me what taeyong ordered this time!” you had no doubt that it was taeyong’s doing.

“forget about that shit. Here, veto power is mine. JENO, STOP MELTING THE ICE AND GIVE ME SOME WATER!” he screamed at jeno who came out hurriedly with both water and coffee.

Jeno took a seat beside taeil but his one glare made him go back. Sighing in relief after quenching his thirst, he continued in a polite voice. “yuta told me about the card. Why didn’t you take it?”

“because I don’t want his money. I’m good with what I have. Besides every transaction related to him would lead me in trouble so why take the risk!” you sounded harsher than you intended but it wasn’t in your control anymore. Mention yuta and you’ll obviously bite!

“the account is already open. Yuta’s gonna transfer same amount of money every month so why don’t spend his money or better, give him a heart attack by paying everything with the card. He’s gonna pay and I promise, he has no say in this so he won’t even scold you!” he sounded quite cheerful which clearly indicated that none of them understood your language.

“no thanks taeil. staying away from his shadow is much safer.”

“shadow runs with the man y/n.”

“the man himself avoids me like a plague so it’s a win win here.”

“what you see is present. Nobody can ever escape a tomorrow! You are evading it today, but one day you’ll eventually face it.”

“I don’t speak quotes!”

“simple! You both collide only to cause harm to each other. For how long do you think this can work. You’ll get tired and I suppose he’d too. when you’ll stop to rest, you’d find him there but at that time you won’t have enough energy to fight off anymore. Placebo is deadly y/n!”

You absorbed his vague statement full of philosophy but your mind couldn’t harmonise with what he meant!

“honestly, I stopped hearing the moment you mentioned yuta so can we continue!”

“yeah sure. Take the card, keep it for emergencies and I’m not taking no anymore. You aren’t hearing me so I’m doing the same. and secondly, can you defend yourself?”

“defend from who exactly?”

“drunken bastards, thieves, goons or whoever comes at you with a knife!” you were puzzled at the sudden mention.

“my personality repels violence and I’ve two strong best friends.” You declared the obvious. The only drunkards you met were outside the clubs and you never went alone so the thought never crossed your mind.

“first is a lie and second is insignificant here. I need you to learn some basics so you won’t need anyone else or just to hold until help comes.”

“what the! Are you actually recruiting me or something? I don’t wanna be a party in your gang wars.” you announced, now clearly understanding what he meant in the first place.

“I’m not telling you to fight with us. You don’t have an ounce of brain do you? it’s for your own safety.”

“safety from what? I live in a rich and peaceful neighbourhood, my dear husband is a corporate of first class, I myself never even go for a simple stroll in a park then who would I even fight?”

“here ,we all are used to the danger that we face everyday. Each and every man you see here is able to dodge anything that comes their way but you.are.not. Just because they are acting like school kids with no care in life doesn’t mean they are any safer. Jeno was making coffee a few minutes ago but after dinner, he’d be going for protection fee collection with others. If shit goes down, you might not even see him again but we won’t let that happen in the first place. It’s not same with you though. god forbid if you attract the attention of wrong people for all the reasons you stated, then how are we going to help you. even if you press the bracelet , it’d take us some time to get there. till then what would you do? You can’t even probably run for more than a mile! can you?”

You just shook your head at him, too baffled to form any words.

“do you devote any time to exercise?”

“I walk enough I guess and some planks when my stomach is out too much.”

“you are no better than these boys seriously.” She rolled his eyes at your statement.

“but despite the exercise or whatever, my strength is nothing against jeno or johhny. I’ll never b-

“if you fail in strength , atleast you can be swift. Or better you can learn to handle a gun or a knife. When do you get free?”

So, that’s why he called you!

“I don’t have a minute to spare for the next 15 days. Prep and exams are more important for me.”

“no worries. We can start after that. But don’t remove the bracelet band under any condition. Some rival mafia has hired a contract killer for you. so run fast if you notice someone following you, press it and we’ll be there. till then just hang on.” Nervousness got hold of your senses as you heard his warning.

“you are fucking kidding right! was I being followe-

“yes, I’m kidding.” he chuckled dryly. “You should see your face. If it was outside the parameters of the room, you’d have passed out already. Panic only leads to death and I don’t want you to die. so do it just for my peace of mind.” You released the breath you were holding till now, feeling relaxed again.

You just nodded at his words. He sounded like some motivational speaker luring you into his lifetime guarantee program but you knew he was right somewhere. you couldn’t depend on the boys to save you from creeps for whole life.

he was good at reading minds, you thought but despite that you wanted to pour the coffee on his head for the heart attack he’d gave you a minute ago.

“it’s risk free and beneficial. What you say?”

“ok. but I don’t wanna spar with the 6 feet ones. I’ll rather learn from you.” it was your turn to cackle!

“we’ll see about that.” He rolled his eyes to the back at your obvious attempt of poking fun at his short stature

JENO, I DIDN’T ASK FOR A COLD COFFEE. MAKE ME A NEW ONE.”

********

Meeting with taeil had benefitted you in every way. The most useful presently was the topic of the thesis he randomly suggested you. “ effect and consequences of veto power in relation to international peace and human rights”.  even mr. kwang, your thesis mentor liked it as it was almost near original. Now you were just left with exams that were just a week away. Fortune was playing in your favour as yuta had been missing from past few days that saved you some extra energy and headaches that you got with his repulsive energy towards you. then there was your newfound love for the sofa that you had permanently dragged by the windows. It helped a lot in relaxing and studying and you ended up sleeping on it, nearly getting used to the cramped neck.

Unbeknownst to you, he did come back, daily. But you were just so occupied that you never noticed the slight shuffling in the midnight. it went on for days until you woke up with a blanket covering your bare legs, evidently not yours!

****************

How to start the finals? By getting wasted? No. certainly not. But birthdays are important, sometimes more than those stupid grades!

The venue for yeong’s b’day celebration was a night club, as expected from yugyeom! He need no reason to get drunk and when his s/o was herself cutting the chains, then it’s the finest deal one could get!

Loaded with university students, the party at the first floor was thundering. The hoots and roars of slightly drunk adults became deafening as soon as the cake was consumed.

“why your classmates are so fucking loud” you screamed in yeong’s ear. You both were seated at the corner on leather seats, drinking away the reality.

“with your dolphin voice, you are in no place to judge them bitch!”

“lets blame this on your drunkard mumbo jumbo!” she jumped in joy at your lame attempt, alcohol speaking out for you.

“btw where’s your boyfriend?” she questioned leaning into your ear.

“who?” you wondered who she was referring to.

“wonwoo! Who else dumbo. His whole army was invited by gyeom but I haven’t seen him yet!”

You just shrugged in response, not wanting to face him. The farther, the better. His possessiveness only elevated your fears. Now that you were bound on taeyong’s mercy, wonwoo would be calling for a danger by being with you, especially when you were incapable of returning his love.

But fate had some cruel plans stored for you. when you were ordering another drink, strong hands gripped your waist. Though beyond tipsy, the moment you touched the protective hold, you knew it was wonwoo. It was always him afterall.

“you could burn me while wearing white and I’d say thank you baby” He whispered, nibbling on your ear, shivers running down to your bare thighs at the sudden action. everyone knew how much you loved white and that’s why yeong had designed this short white satin dress which just screamed “you” and barely left anything to the imagination of the viewer. “and nothing turns me on more than your covered arms.” He continued as his fingers slowly traced the collarbones down to the cleavage, your drunken self melting into his chest. His hands worked swiftly and he guided you into a secluded part to drown the excessive noise. Your back hit a wall as his nose brushed against yours, his slender fingers siding your sling bag to hook at your hips. He bent into your lips, love filled kisses slowly smoothening into hungry ones. The taste he left on yours was of the infamous vodka that he sure had consumed in plenty of amount ,leading him to you. the pledge to keep yourself away from him broke down in figures as he rolled his hips into yours, lips syncing with the movements. His grip bruised your body, hunger lowering from lips to the bare neck. Throwing your head back, savouring his touch, you clutched his shoulders for some control. Scheduled moans became more filthy as his one hand gripped your thigh in a try to hike up your dress. He didn’t do much work as it was already climbing up your hips. A Single move and his fingers graced against your core, tingling sensation burning your whole body. The open mouthed kisses left marks on your cleavage and neck as he fingers fucked you mercilessly.

“I missed you so much baby.”  His wavering yet soft tone met your ears but everything seemed hazy as he drove in and out of you. you felt euphoria in your stomach hitting you once again as he rambled on. “ don’t ever leave me again. you are my only lu-luxury. Don’t you ever dare snatch away the only hope I have! I love you. i fucking love you!” his sped up his actions under the dress but before he could provide you the final pleasure, you came back to the reality he  had divorced you from. you didn’t love him and never would. To his disbelief, you separated yourself from his body, him staggering back with the push.

“wha-

“I don’t love you woo. This-

Your hands filled the space between you two.

“this was never about love. We need to stop. I don’t love you woo. And don’t expect anything better from me. We are over. This is over.”

Your drunken slurs made evident that though you were loaded, the senses were still intact somehow.

“no y/n. don’t do this to me. I’ll wait more if you want. A lifetime if you say. But don’t say you are done with us. I’d die without you.” his words rang like a bell as you attempted to corrected the panties and dress, waving slightly.

You jumped away from him as his words got registered in your head. Ignoring him completely, you turned to enter the blast again but his strong hold on your arm stopped you. you squirmed under him, requesting him to let you go but his confession never halted.

“let go of her wonwoo!” you circled to see jungkook standing there , anger clear in his eyes. “I am not gonna repeat.” Jungkook was indeed dangerous when he was boiling.

“why was he enough and NOT ME!” you shuddered at the raise in his voice as he jerked you away. Timely, jungkook caught you and instructed you to go inside to wait for him. And you complied but not completely.

you were hot, bothered, angry and helpless at the same time so you did what you felt like. It felt like eternity when jungkook found you gulping some shorts in the bar. His brain went haywire for he realised you would’ve reached your peak by now. He cautiously approached you, checking the level of warmness on your cheeks. You were gone and so was he.

“what did you do with woo?” you asked him in the delightfully lovable voice that he found nothing but scary. You acting cute meant it was end of the life for anyone who would witness it. He had tried to record you a few times before in the said condition but it never ended up well with the screen of his phone meeting your wrath everytime. He helplessly dragged you from the bar towards the parking area, ignoring your initial question and the urge to scold you for the whole ruckus with wonwoo.

“I’ll drop you home cutie” he exclaimed, checking the level.

“I’m no cutie! And what about minjunie. And I don’t wanna go with you. I wanna be alone.” He giggled as you pouted at him, a rare sight to behold.

“yeah yeah I know you wanna be alone and blah blah but its past 11 already -

“soooooo. The protocol shall be followed despite the severi-

“shut up! You are not in a class dude. N hurry up, I’ve to pick minjun’s drunk ass as well!”

The discontent in his tone was apparent while he showed you the way forward. continuously wrestling against his strong hands, he finally gave up when you almost tripped over nothing.  

“stop annoying me y/n!”

“am i?” you pouted at him. “I don’t wanna go with you. don’t you understand!” he rubbed his temples in desperation.

“fine I’ll call someone else. But you can’t go alone.” But as he was fishing out his phone, you were gone.

After five minutes he spotted you outside, waving for a taxi.

“why are you so difficult?” his words fell to deaf ears. Watching you continue your frolics, he thought about giving up as a scheme formed in his head. Stopping a taxi , he ushered you in the back seat, moving to talk to the driver instead.

“no you aren’t coming!” you cried, showing your head out of the window. He grabbed his hair in annoyance, narrowing his eyes at you, “I’m not coming with you my mother! Let me give the address to the driver or else you’ll end up nowhere.” He pleaded, clasping his hands, bowing at you.

You giggled pleasantly at his gesture, hands flailing at him. “I don’t live in campus. I’ll give you the address. Wait!” after searching for your phone, you showed him the address saved in the notes app. That indeed surprised him for he wasn’t aware that you changed but decided against asking you. if it was not your new address, it could be trusted enough to be safer as it was saved under “my home”. Commanding the driver with an extreme firmness, he went away. Even in the drunk state, you were sure to some extent that maybe car was not moving.

“let’s go uncle!”

“your friend told me to wait.” you threw your head back realising that kook was upto something. A loud horn heightened your senses as the car moved.

Asshole, you muttered, grasping that he was clearly following you.

***************

“bop bop!” an eternity has passed for you in a futile try of remembering the password. The digits were changing their positions, as you regarded them.

“bop bop!” you tried again, mumbling to yourself, not knowing that you were not even banging the door in the first place. Standing still in your intoxicated state, arms crossed, the daggers you were throwing at the door would give any passer by a food to laugh but unluckily, there was noone there.

Bobbing your head from side to side, you started walking down the corridor, coming back at the your own door every few minutes. Curiously you pressed random button near the keypad. It was a bell, that you didn’t noticed earlier.

“wh- noona! You are here!” it was jaemin. He hugged you tightly before letting you in.

“duh! I’m waiting from last ten years but you won’t open.” Another giggle let jaemin known that you were in inebriated state.

“you are drunk.” He whispered.

“shhhh” you said , throwing your heels.

With jelly legs, you wobbled to the kitchen, catching attention of each and every presence in the living room and there were many of them.

“oh hiya! Home tweet home.” You chanted, hands waving like the wipers of a car. Hyuck and mark greeted you while jaehyun just sat down again, shaking his head in disbelief. However yuta was stunned and hooked to his place. He saw you navigating to the fridge, dropping the bottle, picking it up again, gulping it down, jaemin snatching it from you, apparently for you own benefit.

Jaemin guided you for your room before you got distracted by yuta’s figure staring you down.

“moshi moshi. Don’t you have any Japanese to throw at me today.” Yuta heard jaemin and others snickering as you slurred, walking unsteadily to him. He simply rolled his eyes, waiting for you to complete your attack.

“oh hi hyuck. I heard you don’t change your underwear for years. Go and take a bath right now. Asap” the liquid jaehyun was drinking, came out as a spray from his nose at the insult. Everyone was laughing at your antics except yuta. He scanned you up and down, eyes fixating on the fresh hickies on your visible neck.

“and you moshi moshi. You a-act like an angry young man all the damn ti-time,” hiccups started in between, “ but answer me with your half braincell- what kind of criminal you are! Atleast hid your face while shooting people dude.”

Yuta’s jaw cletched at your use of words, tension rising in the room. His neutral face changed into an angry one as you went on and on, all while poking his chest with your forefinger. “and that knife of yours! What are you? a street goon who hires little kids to scan cctvs for the-

And your body lunged forward, head resting where your finger was, passed out. Yuta’s red eyes didn’t go unnoticed by anyone. Anger radiated his body as he removed hands from his pockets to push you off but mark scooped your sleeping figure in his arms, signalling jaemin to open the door. After finding the key in your purse, mark laid you on the bed, rolling you to the side as jaemin placed a pillow behind to save you from falling.

They arrived in the hall only to find yuta already waiting for them.

“what was the need to baby her? She’s an adult and got drunk at her own expense. Didn’-

“so what hyung? Why are you making it a big deal!” mark replied.

“she is the one who makes everything a big deal. Didn’t you just hear how she was just trash talking about you all! She never fucking leaves a chance to spit at my face that I am a criminal –

“that’s what we are! We are damn criminals and she doesn’t know anything about us”

“but she says it like we are not even humans-

“I don’t understand why are you always throwing her under the bus hyung! Drunk people speak shit and she was totally hammered. Just let it go! Your punishment is over after two days, don’t spoil your mood over something so silly.”

“you can’t ord-

“yes I can and will order you because I agree with her. You do own just a half braincell that is not letting you think properly. Now don’t you dare mention all this to her in the morning.” Several pairs of eyes wandered between yuta and mark as the air became more pressured.

“so you do admit she is in wrong here hmm”

“she was just acting with her pure conscious. She saw a man dying and went to police. Tae hyung just made sure that she isn’t leaving anytime soon. She is trapped with criminals. What else do you expect from her? I know exactly what you want.” Suddenly mark’s eyes softened as he went on.  “You are craving empathy hyung. This is what I have seen in your eyes from the first day. You want everyone to realise that you are also wounded. You don’t despise her in actual but just the sympathy that wasn’t given to you in the first place. Stop acting like a stone. While blaming her you shouldn’t be forgetting that it was supposed to be me. You filled my spot as the killer. It started with me-

“no ma-

“it all started coz I was dammit feeling too sleepy to finish that contract killer. It was supposed to be a sniper attack but you had to go instead-

“I forgot my cover mark. How are you the cause when the problem was my own stupidity in the first place!” yuta shouted, tense silence following. Mark smiled a bit at him before continuing.

“then why do you hate her so much. shouldn’t you be hating me for sending you there or yourself for being careless. We should be compromising, not her. Just stop fighting with running water.”

He quietly said before picking up his jacket, going out. Everyone took that as a cue for leaving as well. Nobody uttered anything. The house was empty but mark’s words echoed in the space for entirety of the night, squeezing yuta into the reality he wasn’t ready to face.

*************

Your head felt like it was carrying all the weight of the world. Light harmed your vision, footsteps made you dizzy as you treaded for the door. Kitchen was suddenly too far away, everything looking too large for the squinted eyes. Water and sugar! two things circled in your head like a mantra, only until you felt a sharp pain in your waist. You slightly cursed the counter for bumping into you and stepped further to get water. the water soothed only your throat, stomach still craved sugar so you placed the large bottle on the counter, returning to open the fridge.

Some shuffling around the corner woke up yuta, who was resting on the couch. It hasn’t been more than few hours that he finally let himself immersed into the dreamland. His night and half of the day was spent in unearthing the deep hole that mark had thrown him into. He got annoyed at himself for failing in reaching a conclusion that would led to mark being wrong and it was the result of this constant thought provoking activity that he was having a persistent headache. He grumbled at the stiff neck as he got up. 13:03. Another sound came from somewhere, stimulating his body to check. With droopy eyes, he noticed you. actually half of you as the other half was searching for gold in the fridge. The hiked up dress was enough to give a free show of your bare legs without any strain. The thought of you eating his food wiped up all the drowsiness, making him go to kitchen.

“its not your bedroom. Close it.” He criticised, yawns escaping simultaneously. You didn’t move for his voice didn’t reach you in the first place. He tsked at your lack of senses as he neared you. but as soon as your figure got larger, his body met the floor brutally, several groans of pain leaving him. You turned around at the noise to see yuta struggling as his knee hit the polished hardwood. His other hand went to the counter for some support but it slipped causing his elbow to hit the cabinet handle more violently. His shout of anguish striked through your sensitive ears, making you swear in irritation.

Your eyes slowly traced the liquid under his body to the top of the counter. the water bottle. It was tilted and empty by the time you noticed and the water was what made yuta slipped in first place.

“fuck it!” he growled, discomfort contorting his features.

Slowly he moved himself to the other side, bruised elbow secured in his hand, grunts exiting him. You knew you were fucked up as soon as his cold eyes fell upon you.

“I guess it’s my time to call taeyong.”

[the-goddessfighter]

Why Ship Batarou? (ʃƪ˘ﻬ˘)

Cover made by @paperficwriter​!!

EDITED!!!

 This post is made in collaboration with @koeharu​ <3<3<3

--------------------

I'm tired of people outside heating a ship just to unload some personal anger on people they don't even know. 

All those people who have asked the questions:

¨Why you shipping them? ¨

¨Is it even posible? ¨

¨Where is the dynamics of this? ¨

 Well, well don’t worry... this is a post dedicated to answering those questions... and also in case someone wants to save energy against a hater.

 ------------------------

 1.- Personality QwQ

 ¨One of my favorite things about the ship that drew me to it in the first place is their personalities! My initial thought was that in different circumstances, these two would get along since they’re both quite wild characters.” -K

Yeah!, uwu let's see:

-Both are proud and stubborn.

-They don't give up on anything and nobody.

-They are the boys who pretend to be rude and dry but have a big heart (among those firm pectorals 7w7)

-Both are good with children; they would never hurt an innocent civilian.

 ----------

¨Which led my to my next thought, we don't know much about Badd's outside life but it seems he only has his sister and we KNOW Garou is completely alone so they would both need someone there for them which they can find in each other ¨ -K

 Exactly. The phrase "God makes them and they come together" would sound great. Sometime loneliness is a necessary feeling, but in a long time it will end up breaking you.

 ------------

¨And considering how they have both shown to be protective about things they care about they would be protective towards each other and that’s what really cemented the idea of ​​this ship to me. It’s just so pure hearted but also fun in the different ways it can be explored ^^ ¨ -K

 Garou did not have a good childhood, there was no one to share his thoughts even if he onley want to had a good conversation, he was always pointed with a finger and be recriminated.

Then we know that Badd is a protective guy and although many things will drive him out of his mind he is always willing to help, if he finds out about that sad past he would surely have a lot more empathy with Garou. Badd is not stupid (reckless maybe ... but not an idiot), he knew that Garou was lying when he said:

- "I have no time to lose with you".

He could not attack his sister because Garou possesses morality (much more than other heroes), he watched him go for a moment even naive of the situation. Something clearly did not fit and instead of being angry with, he simply let him go and continue with his work. (This point will be taken back later, remember *)

Assuming several things happen end up meeting again, and Badd gives him help, Garou would not forget that, many things have been denied to him but he would certainly be eternally grateful to found someone to give him a helping hand. Badd would then become his beginning, a way to start his life again. It’s that something that keeps us safe, that listens to us, that looks for us. If so, Garou would be under great care and esteem fort something that stays by his side and treats him as an equal: In this case Badd.

 Also: Garou saved Zenko, even though he did it "unconsciously"

 ... The image speaks for itself.

  2.- Design UwU

 There are people who accuse us by saying that the only reason we have for shipping them is that they are “attractive”…. I'm like ... WTF?! 

I mean, put the brain to work before the tongue in move.

Of course they are handsome! Of course they are attractive!! (I'm talking about the manga) to say otherwise would indicate that you need glasses!!! But that is not the point...

Another thing that we loved is the contrast of style baby :D. How saying it… it is as if they were the yin yang, the "perfect complement" for each other. Look in detail please:

  @donlemefo​ draw!

G: Black shoes -B: White shoes (canonically on the manga)

G: White pants -B: Black pants

G: Dark sweatshirt -B: Color sweater

G: White Hair -B: Black Hair

G: Golden eyes -B: Brown eyes

  U///U so akHKSASG yesss...

3.- Interactions

 (* Returning to the previous point)

I have also heard people say that it is "impossible" that B and G get along again, arguing this: - Why would Garou want to have something to do with the person who almost killed him? And why would Badd talk to someone who beat him up earlier? -

¬_¬ Seriously ... SERIOUSLY?!!! ufff...

Not to make it long I will give the easiest example in the history of anime:

More than 20 years ago nobody, ABSOLUTELY nobody would have imagined that Vegeta would become one of Goku's best friends and his training partner.

So don't come to tell me that it is "impossible" for Garou and Badd to reconcile in the future dude. U-U*

Even YM took the time to make this nice section: This is just for them because in a way Badd once again realized that G was not completely bad.

 --------------------- He.. Garou stays with the colored cat and Badd with the white ... coincidence?-------------

 .....But there is one more bit ... something that was not seen elsewhere. Badd is not the only one who endured a good fight, of course. But nevertheless it is the one that by default would have won ... or at least leave him very badly injured. What our heart says most for this couple is:

  4.- The teaching Badd left to Garou.

 Garou learns almost instantly as he fights, but are physical-teachings. I explain:

 + Tank top Master = Brute Force

+ Golden Ball = Predict projectiles

+ Spring Mustache = Tolerate Weapons

+ Watchdog man = Beastly / Wild Movements

+ Mumen Rider = ……. Dodge crazy bike attack? X’D

  But Badd is most acclaimed by us for his soul-teaching

  Fighting Spirit!  <3 HEART EYES MF! <3

  Although Garou is a prodigy in what he does, it takes him a long time to understand what Badd told him at the time. He not only understood; He felt it and took it out of one the biggest trouble he got into.

 Against a mental power you don't just have to be physically strong, if your spirit and thought is incorruptible… you are unstoppable. (Those who read the webcomic and manga understand what I say)

----------------------NEW EDITED!!!---------

This is the most recent that has come out. Is't not curious? That among all the fights that Garou has had; a "parallel" of his fight with Badd it's made again?

Here, explicitly Darkshine thinks the words that Garou said of Badd back time.

D: ¨His movements actually getting faster? ¨ G: "His swings are getting faster?"

Including a subtle reference to increased power, since Garou is not giving up... just like MB.

Or Murata is doing all this unconsciously ... or really knows perfectly what he does. Remember that what Murata draws has to be made aware from ONE, then ... I will continue waiting for wich will be his next move.

------------------------

 It is true that Garou interacted with more characters. But, like many of us, we focus on Badd for a ship. What our sense tells is that there is no other character that "fits" better with him that Badd. They are a good mix ... a good couple.

 Comment  what do you like about this ship, I would love to read your ideas!

@koeharu​ @dies-first​ @neko09oarmy​

Finally I want to clarify something very important ... this is for you. That's right ... FOR YOU person who loves to see the world burn. If you do not agree with a ship, there is a nice option to block everything you don't want to see on tumblr. Do not waste your strength to argue with someone, you just look worse than you try to make the ship and its derivatives look bad. -K & T

----------------- I apologize if I get to sound "upset" in the answers, but as people treat me I will treat them---------

[just-random-obsessions]

Funny Moments In Thor Ragnarök

Thor 1

Thor 2

Avengers 1

I know I said I was gonna do Avengers Age of Ultron too, but because it didn’t have Loki in it, I decided to scrap that idea because this series is mostly focused on the relationship between Loki and Thor. So without further ado, all the funny moments in Thor Ragnarök. Side note: This accounts for all the moments were SUPPOSED to be funny. However these are mostly toilet humor, so whether or not it was actually funny to the viewer just depends on that person’s taste in humor. Funny moments listed below cut line which is underneath the tag list.

Edit for clarification: This is not a post supporting Thor Ragnarok. This is an anti post. In another post (that I’m too lazy to write right now) I will be explaining the difference in humor tones between this movie and the previous three. I will also be explaining why this tonal change is hated by anti Ragnarok people.

Tag List: @fyrecrafted @lokijiro @nikkoliferous @miskiett @icyxmischief @iamanartichoke @juliabohemian @official-and-unstable-satan @darthxerik @melodylnoelle @just-another-human-2019 @fandomsandfanfictions @mentallydatingahotcelebrity @cateyes315 @burningarbiterheart @imnotacreepijustlikeyou @usedtobegoodfriend96 @alexakeyloveloki

~ “Where I met you :)” *skeleton’s jaw drops*

~ “Surtr. Son of...a bitch you’re still alive?!”

~ *The chain keeps spinning Thor around and interrupting Surtr

~ “And you’ll grow as big as a house-?” “A mOuNtAiN” 

~ “Oh that’s a crown. I thought it was a big eyebrow”

~ *Thor’s timing being wrong when he says “that’s what heroes do”

~ “oh I make grave mistakes all the time. Everything seems- *shit that’s a bg dragon* -to work out”

~ “Behold!!! My stuff!

~ *Pronounces Texas wrong*

~ “I call them Des and Troy. Together, they Destroy”

~ *Thor drops the hammer in the dragon’s mouth* “Stay!”

~ *The entire Asgardian play*

~ *The woman in the audience emotionally grabbing Thor’s arm*

~ *Thor being all wtf???*

~ “Father” “Oh shit”

~ *that smile!!!* 

~ *Out of breath* “Behold!! Thor! Odinso-” “You had one job”

~ “I swear I left him right here” “right here on the sidewalk or right here where the building’s being demolished?”

~ “Can’t see into the future. I’m not a witch” “No? Then why do you dress like one?” “hEy!!!1!!!1!!”

~ “I can’t believe you’re alive. I mourned you! I cried for you!” “I’m honored??”

~ *the two girls who approach Thor to take a selfie*

~ “Sorry to hear that Jane dumped you” “She didn’t dump me. I dumped her. It was a mutual dumping”

~ *Thor poking the piece of paper cause he thinks it’s Loki*

~ “You can put down the umbrella”

~ “So Earth has wizards now” “The preferred term is Master of the Mystic Arts” “Alright wizard”

~ *Thor fumbling with the cool spikey things*

~ “I don’t drink tea” “Well what do you drink?” “Not tea”

~*the self-refilling beer*

~ “No I don’t have a phone but you could’ve sent an electronic letter. It’s called an email” “Right do you have a computer?” “No what for?” *confusion*

~ “My hair is not to be meddled with-OW!!!!”

~ “We could’ve just walked”

~ “Don’t forget your umbrella” *the awkwardness between them as everything crashes*

~ “I hAvE bEeN fAlLiNg FoR tHiRtY mInUtEs!!!!1!!1!!!!”

~ I’m pretty sure Odin’s death scene was the only scene to not have any humor in it.

~ “Who are you?” “I’m just the janitor”

~ *Valkyrie tries to do the Badass Walk but falls off the edge*

~ *Val keeps stumbling*

~ “But we’ve already got him” “Alright then. I guess I go through you”

~ *The guns not working at first*

~ *Val’s smirk*

~ *Thor’s mashed up face on the window of the ship*

~ “Whoever you are.” “Whoever I am?! Did you listen to a word I said?!”

~ *Thor’s scared screaming turned into a confused and awkward screaming as he is introduced to the Grandmaster*

~ “He’s wonderful. It is a he?” “It is a he”

~ “She is the- and it starts with a b” “Trash” “Were you just waiting to call her that? It doesn’t start with a b” “Booze-head”

~ “You’ll pay for this” “No I got payed for this”

~ “I am the god of THUNDER” *sparkles*

~ “OH MY GOD I’m stepping in it!!!”

~ “I’m going back to Asgard.” “Assgard?”

~ “Loki!” “Shhh!”

~ *Loki and Thor start arguing*

~ “Get me out!” “I can’t!” “Get me out!” “I can’t!”

~ “I’ve never met this man in my life” “He’s my brother” “Adopted”

~ “Let me introduce myself my name is Korg. I’m kinda like the leader in here”

~ “I tried to start a revolutions but I didn’t print enough pamphlets”

~ “Oh no. Doug’s dead”

~ “That’s exactly what Doug used to say. See you later New Doug”

~ Infinity Gauntlet: “Fake!!”

~ Casket: “Weak!”

~ Surtr’s Crown: “Smaller than I though it would be”

~ *Thor throwing rocks at Loki*

~ “Piss off ghost!!”

~ “It would pull me off-” “Oh my god. The hammer pulled you off?” 

~ *Thor fumbling with talkin to Val and doing the thumbs up*

~ “By Odin’s beard you shall not cut my hair” *2 seconds later* “Please kind sir do not cut my hair”

~ “I have to get off this planet” 

~ “Loki! Look who it is!” *NOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENO

PENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPENOPE

NOPENOPENOPENOPE

~ *Thor gets whacked around like Loki did in Avengers* “YES!!! THATS HOW IT FEELS*

~ “Not just to execute people, but also to execute their vision. But mainly to execute people”

~ *Hulk being naked in the hot tub* “That’s in my brain now”

~ “What are you crazy?!” “YES”

~  “Hulk like fire. Thor like water”

~ *Thor stumbling around Val again*

~ “Because that’s what heroes-” *gets bonked in the head with the ball*

~ *the voice activation being “Point Break”*

~ “What happened to your hair?” “Some creepy old man cut it off” “It looks good”

~ “Banner” “Welcom strongest Avenger” “Uhhh what?”

~ “You and I had a fight “ “Did I win?” “No I won” “That doesn’t sound right”

~ *Topaz trying to hand the Grandmaster the meltsick*

~ “I don’t wanna fight your sister that’s a family issue”

~ *Thor and Bruce arguing like children*

~ “It’s my disguise” “I can see your face” “Not when I do this”

~ *Bruce complimenting Valkyrie*

~ *Thor stealing the name Revengers from the Avengers*

~ “Where are you at these days?” “It varies from moment to moment” *NOPE*

~ “We are going through the big one” “The Devil’s Anus?!”

~ “I’m asking for safe passage. Through the Anus”

~ *The snake story* 

~ “You guys have a beast :D?!!!!”

~ *”I’ll explain later”*

~ “I don’t like that word” “Mainframe?”

~ *Thor and Loki step out of the elevator* “Hello” “Hi”

~ *get help*

~ “Alright I can figure this out it’s just another spaceship”

~ “Did she just say the Grandmaster uses it for orgies?!!” “Yeah. Don’t touch anything”

~ “Use one of your PhD’s” “None of them aRe FoR FLYING ALIEN SPACESHIPS”

~ “Well you do seem like you’re in desperate need of leadership” “Why thank you” 

~ “Not that [Asgard’s] not nice it’s just that it’s on fire”

~ “I love what you’ve done with the place. Redecorating I see”

~ *heroic music plays* *Bruce falls flat on his face*

~ “I’m Korg. This is Miek. We’re gonna jump on that spaceship. Wanna come?”

~ “Your savior is here!!! Did you miss me?”

~ “You’re late” “You’re missing an eye” 

~ “I think we should disband the Revengers”

~ “Hit her with a lightning blast” “I just hit her with the biggest lightning blast in the history of lightning”

~ “So what do we do?” “I’m not doing Get Help”

~ “You can’t defeat me” “I know. But he can”

~ “We’re fulfilling the prophecy” “I hate this prophecy”

~ “For once in your life! Don’t smash!” “Big monster?!” 

~ “It will become a haven-” *Asgard explodes* “Yeah no sorry”

~ “Oh Mieks dead. Yeah I stomped on him on the bridge. I felt so guilty I’ve been carrying him around all day.” *2 seconds later* “Oh Miek you’re alive!! He;s alive guys!! What was your question?”

~ “Do you really think it’s a good idea to go back to earth?” “Yes of course, the people of Earth love me”

I FINALLY FINISHED IT!!!!!

[jacksgreysays]

Fake Fic Summaries 26/?, the Five Ways Love Hurts edition (2020-04-20)

A/N: I would like to preface this be reiterating the shameful fact that I still have yet to consume any canon BnHA. All of my knowledge is entirely from fanfiction, the occasional wiki-ing, and various meta analysis posts.

I mean... I don't think that really matters considering these are all fake AU/recursive ship fics, but I just feel like it's something I should warn people about?

Anyway, here we go!

~

1) clockwork hearts (the too many gears remix)

Or, when you're in love with an android because he's so human, but that android loves some other human entirely...

... and that other human hates your beloved android because he's not the real thing.

Aka, I read clockwork hearts by OneshotPrincess and thought to myself, how do I make this beautiful and sweet fic dramatic and sad? Throw some Bakugou into the mix!

Okay, so, I would highly recommend the fic--it's beautiful and sweet and pretty quick and also this next bit is spoiler-y/won't matter much if you haven't read it.

Anyway, clockwork hearts is a TodoDeku fic in which Izuku is an android, and Todoroki is a rich boy completely enamored by this android who seems so human.

And while I cannot say whether or not it's because the android IS based off a human Izuku in the original fic, I can say that's the situation in this little brainstorm because what if that was true? And so because android Izuku is based on human Izuku that would mean android Izuku loves (whether platonically or romantically) Bakugou.

But that means Bakugou knows (and maybe loves?) the human Izuku so android Izuku is like... a despicable artificial mockery in his eyes.

So I guess first I have to figure out what the BakuxHuman!Izuku side of this fic would be--like, is who/why does Human!Izuku have an android version of him? Is he in some way incapacitated or or missing/presumed dead or actually dead?--and then, second, I would have to figure how the TodoxAndroid!Izuku path crosses with the BakuxHuman!Izuku path.

I mean, if Human!Izuku is missing then maybe Android!Izuku has the clues to find him so Bakugou is like "hey, I need your shitty robot to find my [beloved] childhood friend" to Todoroki because he doesn't even think of Android!Izuku as being sentient and Todoroki's just like, wtf no, but Android!Izuku does kind of love Bakugou and is just like. "He needs my help! Even if it's to find Human!me."

And then it becomes a begrudging trio road trip to either a) find Human!Izuku or b) give Bakugou closure on Human!Izuku's death PLUS c) fall in love???

I just love drama!

~

2) Becoming Real (not too shabby)

Katsuki has long ago put away his childish things, but Izuku's not one for giving up.

Or, in which Izuku is one of Katsuki's childhood toys and wants to become Real.

(aka, a Velveteen Rabbit/Pinocchio AU)

Vaguely reminiscent to the above brainstorm, although I don't know if this would be weird to make romantic or not. Given the whole Izuku starts as one of Katsuki's childhood toys and all.

I'm trying to figure out in this journey to become real, if Katsuki's life is just normal BnHA world (minus Izuku as a human) so he goes to UA and there are quirks etc etc. Because that would mean I couldn't make some of the other toys/beings on Izuku's journey to Realism be the Dekusquad. Like. The idea of Iida and Uraraka and Tsuyu as other toys/Jiminy Cricket equivalents trying to help/guide/keep Izuku from doing something nuts is very fun. But then would that mean they're not in class 1-A anymore? Or is this a weird Wizard of Oz situation? Or are the League of Villains obstacles for Izuku instead of being actual Villains ruining the UA students' lives?

Or... is this somehow a Izuku is actually human with a quirk but long ago something happened to Inko so he turned himself into a toy as a weird quirk defense mechanism and Katsuki took him home and both of them/just Izuku forgot how to turn back? So the answer all along is to get to Aizawa? ... but that one's kinda weird and horrifying, so I'm going to say no.

I don't know, I just thought. Velveteen Rabbit = Izuku was easy to connect but there's not much of a plot to follow through on?

~

3) Bakugou Katsuki's Guide To House Husbandry and Domestic Bliss

It's just a Way of the House Husband AU but with retired pro hero Ground Zero instead of a former yakuza. That's it.

Weirdly enough I have more semi-angsty backstory for this fluffy nonsense than actual fluffy nonsense, presumably because I was trying to figure out a feasible set up for the fluffy nonsense? So it's something like: 

When Izuku and Katsuki are six years old, they are attacked by a villain made of sludge.

This is after Izuku's quirk has failed to appear, after he has been branded as quirkless and useless, but before the words become pointed and suffocating and bitter. 

This is after Katsuki fell and Izuku leaped after him hand outstretched, after a false sense of inequality has been wedged between them, but before it can permanently shape a dynamic of confused conflict.

This is after their lives have been tied together, for better and worse, but before it can be horrendously tangled and frayed.

When Izuku and Katsuki are six years old, they are attacked by a villain made of sludge and saved by the number one hero All Might--it changes both everything and nothing of their futures lives.

Because Katsuki will turn this horror into determination, will become a hero that always wins--and better than All Might, he vows, staring wide-eyed at the curled form of his best friend in All Might's arms as he run, run, runs to the hospital. And Izuku will still help people with all he can give, even quirkless and one hand short.

And two decades later, as they move in together, this still stays the same: Katsuki is far and away the better house husband.

... and it's basically Izuku is some kind of engineer/doctor/physical therapist and at the top of his industry same as Katsuki who is Ground Zero and who is on some kind of injury related sabbatical and who has decided to be the Best House Husband ever.

I had some more thoughts about how, even though Izuku still admires All Might and doesn't at all blame him for the loss of his hand, that his mentor/goal in this world is the engineer/doctor/physical therapist that helped child Izuku with his prosthetic (and I came up with a name and a non-work related quirk for them, too, Akahana Tonakai who can make their nose glow and that's it. Quirks do not make them great, etc. etc.) And also some angst about how the hand that Izuku lost was the hand that he reach out to Katsuki when they were younger (should've take it when you had the chance!! he sometimes thinks, before shaking that thought away)

I don't have anything concrete tho, so... that's it.

~

4) Legend of... ???

Power, Wisdom, Courage...

Even without the great calamity, the princess of legend, or the hero of time, the triforce still remains in Hyrule waiting for those who would wield them.

Or, Katsuki was always going to be a hero, he just has no idea what to about with the weird forest spirit that has the other half of his sword.

Basically... Deku = Deku Tree from Legend of Zelda? Not that Izuku is that big old tree, but, like, maybe he was raised in the forest? Maybe it's the only name that non-forest dwellers know? I don't know. I've literally only played Breath of the Wild and, like, 20% of Majora's Mask so... the lore is not strong in me.

I kind of had an idea of, like, mixing the "canon Fantasy!AU" (which is, frankly, bewildering that that's a term that both applies and makes sense) but I don't really know the full lore of that either? I mean, maybe All Might was a powerful hero who had managed to unite all three pieces of the TriForce (at expense to his health) and when his sword was split in two and one ended up with Katsuki while the other was SUPPOSED to be waiting for its other half in the forest protected by the Deku Tree but instead Izuku was like. Hey. I can wield this to protect people and off he went and now it's kind of this chasing me, chasing you type adventure?

I was also trying to figure out the whole Power = Bakugou, Courage = Izuku, Wisdom = ??? thing. Because while I would normally be like, ah, yes, the Big Three would be Bakugou, Izuku, and Todoroki, I wouldn't necessarily say Todoroki is Wisdom? So... *shrugs*

~

5) i dream of flowers (the always fading remix)

Or, how to take a yearningly sweet and slightly melancholy fic and turn that sad dial up to eleven!

This would be a real sad remix of i dream of flowers (and they're always sad) by Seeress

The idea I have is going to be spoiler-y and it's not worth the spoiler so PLEASE read that first. Trust me, it's worth it. Actually, all of Seeress' fic is so *chef's kiss* if you're into BakuDeku. Anyway, the rest of the brainstorm is under the cut so as not to violate spoilers.

I really just wanted to lean on that ANGSTIER AMNESIA. So the remix is more... in which they can only be together when Bakugou is "Ground Zero" because Izuku's brain is literally incapable of holding memories of "Bakugou Katsuki" after the hanahaki surgery. So not only did the surgery cause retrograde amnesia (in that, all of Izuku's memories of Katsuki were taken out along with his feelings) it also causes anterograde amnesia in that, Izuku can't form new memories surrounding the person he knows as "Bakugou Katsuki." Kind of like a vaccine... or, so as to maintain the flower vibe/analogy, it's like selective herbicide.

BUT (and here's where it gets deliciously angsty) he can still form memories of the hero "Ground Zero" he just can't connect that Ground Zero = Bakugou Katsuki. Which is especially fun given that in the original fic they meet up again and Ground Zero is trying to reconnect with/date Izuku. It's not quite the level of Fifty First Dates, because Izuku CAN keep memories of Ground Zero (and like in the original fic, Izuku has been a fan of Ground Zero for a couple of years) it's just whenever Katsuki tries to say his real name that the memories/connections fail to form. Like the two identities must be kept compartmentalized. So they can have a perfectly functional relationship so long as Katsuki only ever stays Ground Zero to him.

I don't know how to get to a resolution though, or if there even is one? Because on the one hand, I guess I would love Katsuki mildly suffering in order to be with Izuku for infinity, but Izuku is also real smart and I feel like even amnesia wouldn't stop him and he's not really one to be stuck in a dilemma when he can just resolve it through sheer force of will... *shrugs*

[tradingjack]

Hey so uh I forgot that I hate drawing wings lol

Anyways, this is a headcanon I came up with sometime 2 weeks ago and I’m sure someone else already came up with as well and wrote about before I finished this involved-ass drawing and wrote about it myself but I’m sharing it anyway. Of course it involves Good Omens cause uhh that’s the current hyperfixation my dudes

Basically this is the Archangel, Raphael.

About the headcanon under the cut if you’re interested (prepare for a goddamned novel)

So yeah, this is a drawing of the Archangel Raphael. I’m sure those interested have heard the theory by now that Crowley could have been the Archangel Raphael before the Fall, based on the fact that Raphael is not in Good Omens canon (seemingly replaced by Sandalphon or whatever), Raphael’s symbol is a snake wrapped around a staff, and, for me personally, the fact that Crowley can just??? Stop time????? Like what kind of overpowered Bull Shit

(I’m sure there’s a bunch of other things that support this theory that I just don’t know, please look it up some people really go in depth and it’s awesome)

Also, a brief note on angel rankings. I looked it up, and it didn’t really help because there is a lot of conflicting information out there. In the end,  I just kept it at Wikipedia cause fuck it, it is a pretty reliable source in the end. We’re gonna be focusing on the first and third spheres, since the second sphere really doesn’t apply. Basically, the highest order of angels are seraphim, followed by the cherubim and then the thrones. Skip the second sphere, and the lowest three rankings are, in order of most to least rank, principalities (or rulers), archangels, and angels. Now, concerning the difference between archangels and Archangels: apparently the capital letter makes a big ol difference. Archangels with a capital letter are not, in fact, the second lowest ranking but may be interpreted to mean above all other angels, and are the highest ranked angels even among the seraphim. Therefore, the highest angels of the highest are referred to as Archangels with a capital A. (Idk if the Archangels are even really mentioned in the book, I haven’t read it yet, so idk if their titles are capitalized. I’m talking mostly in the context of the Amazon Prime show.)

Quick description of seraphim and therefore Archangels straight from Wikipedia: “fiery six-winged beings; with two wings that cover their faces, with another two that cover their feet, and the last two they use to fly.” (Oh shit I forgot the fire goddamnit I’m such a fuckin idiot oh well it’s too late I wrote this after I finished the drawing)

So, Crowley could be the fallen Archangel Raphael. However, as someone else brought up (and I’ve seen several posts stating this), the name “Aziraphale” is like a bastardization of the phrase “Also Raphael,” meaning Aziraphale could have been the Archangel Raphael but demoted and therefore forced to be renamed. It makes sense that Aziraphale could have been at least of a higher rank than a Principality because he was supposed to be guarding the Gates of Eden, which, in biblical canon, were guarded by higher ranking angels than Principalities (I think they were as high up as cherubim?? idk).

And then I heard, when Neil and Terry were writing the book, both Aziraphale and Crowley were originally just the demon, Crowley. I think it was Terry who made the decision to split that one character into 2 characters instead.

(Also if that isn’t the most soulmate-y shit I’ve ever heard)

But also like... What if that was how it was in canon?

What if........Crowley and Zira............................were both........the Archangel Raphael before the Fall?

Cause like, Raphael (or Israfel, in some religions) literally means “God heals.” Some of the things they’re the patrons are are of “young people,” “guardian angels,” “lovers,” “travelers,” basically everyone in the medical field, and “ordained marriage.” They’re like... everything optimistic and loving and hopeful about humanity. (Nothing about time but like, wtf?? That’s so powerful it’s gotta be the power of the seraphim, it’s at least equal enough to Lucifer’s power that it’s able to give them more time before Lucifer shows up to make a game plan, like it stops Lucifer???? That’s some power to give a lowly-ass demon, that an angel as powerful as a Principality isn’t able to do) It makes you think huh, maybe they care about humanity a lot more than most of the others would. So how would they have fallen?

Well, maybe they got angry at God for testing the humans so damn much. Like Crowley said, a tree right in the middle of the garden that’s super accessible? Literally the only thing the humans aren’t allowed to touch when humans, the most curious and spiteful things in the universe, are more likely to touch something when they’re told not to, when it’s obviously not allowed, and doesn’t appear to present any immediate danger? It’s not very fair.

Another interesting thing; in some canon, Raphael is even considered to be the closest to God, able to talk directly to Her, and possibly even the highest ranking angel of all, even above Michael. So God was likely very close to Raphael in return. (Of course, in the context of the show, it seems that all of the Archangels are very disconnected and are also all on equal footing, it not being entirely clear where Michael, Uriel, and Gabriel stand with each other in terms of ranking even though Michael is usually considered the highest ranked in most biblical canon. One explanation I came up with is that after God banished Raphael, that would be two of the seven archangels that She would have had to banish, her favored, so She could have withdrawn from everything in order to have some alone time, and just became more and more withdrawn as time went on until it was like She’d completely abandoned them.)

And if Raphael started questioning this wrathful god who just kicked out like, half of heaven, including Lucifer, one of her other favorites, I imagine she’d be pretty upset and not willing to hear about complaints right now. But she trusts this angel, so instead of straight kicking Raphael out, she gives them a choice instead. It’s not like they’re trying to straight rebel, anyways.

When Raphael chooses to leave, She doesn’t have a choice then but to cast at least that part of Raphael out, the part that cares too much, who doesn’t want to harm the humans. She says, “crawl under the feet of those you care so much about,” and splits their eyes and casts their staff down into hell cause like, you can’t just have a rogue ethereal being wandering about Earth with the humans, so the newly formed snake which represents all that Raphael chose to leave heaven for is Lucifer’s problem now. 

But in splitting Raphael like that, she’s left with this less powerful being who’s still attached to heaven, who still has the gold of an angel but it looks washed out on their head, and who looks up with sky blue eyes and who looks lost as anything. She doesn’t want Raphael gone, so She pretends this one is also Raphael, but She’s still kinda upset so She sends this “Also Raphael” to Earth to guard Eden. Because they’re weakened, She equips them with a limited edition Flaming Sword™ and sends them to guard the Gates of Eden.

Meanwhile, the Raphael that got sent to Hell gets processed (?) and realizes that they’re now a snake. They really don’t like the name “Crawley” in the future so I imagine that when they joined hell, they were given the name “Crawley” based on the fact that they’re now a snake, and none of the residents of Hell wanna go to Earth since the entire reason almost all the demons in hell got kicked out of Heaven is cause they didn’t wanna love humans. “Crawley,” however, got kicked out for caring about humans too much, so the lords in hell decide to send them. So “Crawley” ends up tempting the humans into eating the fruit, making sure it’s on their terms and happens somewhat safely, and watches the humans leave.

And then he meets “Also Raphael,” and, as someone else has pointed out, Crowley has never had to ask for their name. They just know 👀

Crowley, imo, has been the better of the two, consistently throughout the series. Crowley’s never killed, has always questioned why humans have to be tested and hurt and killed, including motherfucking Jesus Christ, hasn’t even lied to Aziraphale, tries to get out of doing their job consistently, jumps on the opportunity to perform miracles alongside their dastardly inconveniences, has been in love with Aziraphale ever since they found out that Zira helped protect the humans by giving the couple Zira’s own protection??? The “god-given Flaming Sword™?” HELLO THIS DEMON IS IN LOVE AND THAT IS ACTUALLY CANON?????? That, and like... while Aziraphale, who’s still a part of heaven’s whole bureaucracy deal, felt the need to contact god through a whole damn ritual, all Crowley did to try and contact God was just look up and talk. I think Crowley knows about the choice and about who they were before the Fall, but doesn’t associate themselves as Raphael anymore, therefore the “I didn’t chose to fall, (BUT) I just sorta sauntered vaguely downwards.”

(Going off of that, I don’t think Crowley knows that Aziraphale is literally their other half; I like to think that Crowley just thinks Aziraphale was the angel chosen by Her as their replacement in heaven, therefore “Also Raphael” meaning another Raphael and not literally part of them that they left in heaven. They don’t know why they knew that Aziraphale was named Aziraphale right off the bat, but it doesn’t really matter to them tbh; before they fell in love, they thought Aziraphale was just another angel, and then after they fell in love it still didn’t matter cause they were in love baby!)

Meanwhile, Aziraphale’s goodness is either out of fear of disobeying heaven or being nice to Crowley. Which, they’re not even that nice to Crowley when it matters tbh. Or humans, most of the time. Like they protected Adam and Eve but wasn’t gonna blink an eye about all those children being drowned until Crowley guilted them about it.

Although they used to be the same angel, I think that, over 6000 years and even then, in the Garden, Crowley and Aziraphale ended up becoming their own person. Aziraphale, even though God cast out the part that cared about humans a little too much and is basically Raphael’s attachment to heaven and God, ended up caring quite a bit on their own, giving the first couple that sword for protection and growing very attached to the things humans created, and abandoned their allegiance to heaven after losing their faith. Crowley, who is the care and defiance and power of the archangel Raphael, ended up a pretty lowly ranked demon and is pretty damn bitter, especially after the death of Jesus of Galilee, and when they do use their power, it’s usually to fuck with humans in some capacity (unless it’s to help himself or Aziraphale :P ).

TL;DR I think that both Crowley and Aziraphale are remnants of the Archangel Raphael after the Fall because Raphael questioned God concerning the testing of the humans and chose to leave heaven. God wasn’t happy and did some shit that ended up with Crowley and Aziraphale being as they are. But both are still their own person.

[typicalmidnight]

iron man 2 running commentary

okay so watching iron man 2 for the first time and i have a feeling im gonna have lots of commentary to share so it will all be under the cut! i’m gonna keep updating it as i watch!

*starts watching iron man 2 without watching iron man first cause it’s not on netflix and is only 2 minutes in but completely confused*

*questions my intelligence because i was able to understand the other marvel movies without watching other ones first*

*wonders if somehow i haven’t seen enough tony stark on tumblr to understand but i’ve somehow seen enough of other things to understand other movies*

*cue suprised and upset anon* sorry anon!!

okay anon!! help me pls! is the guy in the very beginning of iron man 2 someone from the first movie, and if he is who is he?? or is he new in this movie? edit: nevermind i looked it up

omg the first scene we see iron man is so cooool i love it!

holy sh*t he just landed on a stage omggg *freaks out so much because WOW*

im not even 7 minutes in yet but WOW IM SHOOK

i litterally just watched that first scene of tony/iron man in awe the whole time

“the possibility of world peace” BAAAAAHAHAHHAHAHAAHAHAAAAAA there’s a whole lot in store for the world, and i can guarantee it wont be peaceful lol

the stark expo is year long?!?!!?!!??? wow....

oooh oooh oooh that’s happy!

tony with kids awww

OMG THATS PETER PARKER RIGHT

STAN LEEEE OMG AWWWW

wait what did tony do??

AHHHHH pepper!!

does tony like pepper yet?? are they dating??

god tony. his sense of humor omg.

pepper isnt impressed lol

tony is so savage we stan a queen lol

you’re right, it isn’t canada cause we’re AWESOME and dont have ppl trying to get rid of iron man

rhodey!! i know who that is!

litterally everything tony says is amazing

oooooh whats tony up to?...

world peace? dream on tony

did he just say f**k you to tony stark? UM NO YOU DID NOT

oof the scenes with this bad dude are boring

wait i take that back HE JUST CUT A TV IN HALF!!

“wake up, daddy’s home” god i love tony

i think im getting too excited about everything lolll

tony insulting that robot arm thing gives me life

whats that thing in tony’s chest?? im guessing it has something to do with him being iron man and was part of the first movie

im confused about the relationship between pepper and tony

oooh shes ceo congrats to her!!

is this actually good tho?? the look on her face isnt great

oh okay its good she was just suprised

are those like fake documents or something?

OMG ITS NATASHA!!! AHHHHHHHH I LOVE HER SO MUCH SHE’S LIKE MY FAVE MCU WOMAN OTHER THAN MJ

i got way too excited there and hit my wrist on my wall and now it hurts

wait he doesn’t know nat yet??? HOW?!

also ummm natalie rushman?? that name kinda suits her?? ish idk

NATASHA IS A QUEEEEEEN!!!! I STANNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

i also got so excited about nat that my eyes started to water

“i want one” okay tony nat could knock you out in a second and she for sure doesn’t need a man! also PEPPER!!!!!! LIKE WHAT ABOUT HER!

its the grand prix! it looks just like it does in cars 2!! lollll i was super shooketh about that when i made the connection

OMG ITS NAT AGAIN YAY!

WAIT is tony gonna drive that race car??? is he gonna race??? OMG i hope he does

also my wrist still hurts

wait pepper is suprised?? tony you didnt tell pepper? TONY YOU DIDNT TELL PEPPER??? TONY COME ONNNNNN

OMG TONY WHY PEPPER IS CONCERNED NOW

also is nat working for tony or something

oof its 12 am i should sleep i have school tmrw

haha bish that reporter lady left cause ur boring and nobody cares about you

AHHHH TONY’S GONNA RACEEEE

omg tony is racing tony is racing TONY IS RACING TONY IS RACING!!!! TONY PLS DONT DIE OR SOMETHING

hello my name is leea and i’m a huge drama queen that loves and cares so much about tony stark

OMG ITS THE VILLAIN GUY ACKKK TONY IS GONNA DIE

im still super dramatic lol

and also 100% convinced tony is gonna die even tho i know that wont happen

IM GETTING SO MUCH ANXIETY FROM JUST WATCHING THIS AHHHH

THE VILLAN GUY IS GOING SOMEWHERE ONTO THE TRACK OR SOMETHING ACKKKK

i hit my elbow and my head (not too hard dont worry) and the elbow is the same arm that i hurt my wrist so now my arm hurts from my elbow to my hand

WHAT IS THAT GUY DOING HE JUST WALKED ONTO THE RACE CAR TRACK

i litterally pressed play and then pressed pause two seconds later ooooof

peppers face omg she is shooketh lol

WTF IS HE DOING??!!!!!! also wth is he wearing on his chest?

OOOOOOOOOMG he has his slicy electricity weapon thingies TONY IS GONNA DIE AHHHH

HE JUST HIT A CAR OMG I HOPE THE PERSON IS OKAY

^big example of me being a drama queen and innocent and sweet at the same time

HAPPY HAS WHAT IM ASSUMING TO BE IRON MAN SOMETHING

TONY IS ABOUT TO DIE!!!

i paused it right before he hits the car omg the suspense!!!!!

ANXIETY LEVELS RIGHT NOW

OMG TONY NOOOOOOOO

IM BREATHING SO DEEP AND FAST RIGHT NOW IM PANICKING FOR TONY (it’s called hyperventalating. future me remembered the word lol)

dude WHYYY would you take off your helmet??!!!!

there is a dude coming to kill you and i think a helmet would help protect you idiot!!

OMG THERES A CAR COMING AT THE VILLAIN GUY

WHAT IF IT HITS HIM AND THEN HITS TONY

THEY JUST EXPLODED OMG

i just choked because i was like WHAT JUST HAPPENED

there are cars exploding behind him and this dude just doesnt care!!

why have i started saying dude?

owww my wrist hurts

typing hurts

owwww

its actually really not that bad im dramatic

is pepper gonna save tony????

does the case have the rescue armor ive read about?????

HE JUST TRIED TO KILL TONY

*facepalms* tony WHY did you just hit him on the head with whatever that was??? what did you think it would accomplish??????? this dude just sliced your car in half and tried to kill you, do you think you can take him out by hitting him on the head??? just get tf out of there!!!

OMG HES GONNA KILL TONY

i just hit my head again (not hard it fine)

OMG DID HE JUST HIT TONY

I THINK HE JUST HIT TONY

IM NOT OKAY

AND I DONT THINK HE IS EITHER

AHHHHHHHHHHH

okay i’m going to bed cause its almost 1 am and i have school. anyway, this is the 100th comment which is kinda good to leave off at! i’ll finish watching tmrw and keep posting!

okay i’m back! about to start watching the movie!

ahhhhhh poor tony!!! i’m only a few seconds in but already panicking for him!!

omg hes getting ready to kill tony!! and tony is just lying on the ground!!!

pepper and happy come save him! ! ! ! ! !!!!!!!

or nat!!!!

ahhhhhhhhh tonys gonna die!!!!!!!!!!!!!

with every second i freak out moreeeee

oh thank GOD tony moved!!!

that car just exploded omg tony almost diedddd!!!

AHHHHH TONY IS ON FIRE

how tf is he so calm!!!!????!?!?!?!?!?

i mean hes not that calm but way calmer than any normal human should be in this situation

is he just like used to people trying to kill him??

OMG thats soo saaaaaaaddddd

OKAY HERE COMES PEPPER AND HAPPY

please run over him!!!

OMG THEY ALMOST HIT TONY

but they hit the bad guy yay!!!

awww tony is bleeding!

well i mean thats kinda expected lol

oof tony is mad

OMG PEPPER IS SO PISSED

shes acting like a mom lol

OMG THE GUYS WEAPONS ARE POWERING ON

THEY’RE ALL GONNA DIE

TONY JUST GET IN THE CAR

OMG THE DOOR

TONY GET IN THE CAR AND HAPPY GET TF OUT OF THERE!!!!

tony just GET IN THE CAR

OMG THE AIR BAG

HE JUST CUT THE WINDOW

THIS SCENE IS SO INTENSE OMG

okay pepper i love you but JUST GIVE TONY THE CASE

tony your armor is taking WAY TOO LONG to get on!!!

AHHHHH LOOK AT THE ARMOR!!!!!

ITS SO OLD

like not old

but compared to his current suit

the “it’s nanotech. you like it?” one

its nothing

AHHH HE HIT TONYS ARM

AHHHH TONYS GONNA DIE

AHHHH PEPPER IS SCREAMING

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

#drama queen much? #yes thats me

AHHH COME ON TONY

love how i’ve only gotten 3 more minutes into the movie and i’m already at 47 comments

OMG HE JUST WHIPPED TONY TO THE GROUND

omg poor tony!!!!

can everyone just leave my dad alone PLEASE

YAY TONY!! NOW THE BAD GUY IS ON THE GROUND!!!

oh thank god tony is okay hes not dead he won for now

eww he just spat out a bunch of blood

“you loose” how??? like what???

ooooooooooh wait no is tony gonna get in trouble.......

i forgot to say this yesterday but this whole scene with the guy on the track and stuff and the exploding cars in kinda similar to cars 2

i guess you cant have a racing scene in a movie without a car exploding tho

what is up with that guy with glasses?? like hes weird i dont trust him

why arent there subtitles translating whatever language they are speaking in (french? idk)

ya its french

ofc tony talks about the technology lol

and critcizes the bad guy’s

tony this guy tried to kill you WHY are you sitting down next to him??!!?

that guy is weird and kinda creepy

okay just f off senator dude nobody likes you, your opinion isnt valid, and i wanna punch you

“these suits exist now”????? wtf b*tch no they dont!

wait what ever happened to nat??

pepper is really responsible shes great i love her

what does that note say???

omg is that a bomb or something??!

why do guards always help prisoners escape like seriously

is that guy gonna take his place or something??

also he kinda looks like haymitch from hunger games

omg wait WTF WAS THAT

ALSO GUARD WHAT THE HELL

i was right! it was a bomb!

why did they throw him in a truck??

omg why are they in an airport?!

are they gonna help him escape??!!

why is there a table and people....

is that glasses guy sitting at the table?

i was right it is glasses guy!

i didn’t trust him from the start

why is he helping him tho...

friend? fan? what is going on?!!!???

YAYYYYY theres nat!!!

“erratic behaviour”??? what are you talking about???? he just saved himself from being killed how is that erratic?????!!

awwww poor tony

i beleive in you tony, and i love you, but no honey, you don’t know exactly what you’re doing you need help!

“software sh*t” aaaaaaaaaaahahahahhaahhaaaaa

make iron man look like an antique? ya no way is that gonna happen

is nat his assistant or something im a bit confused

aww tony is like so depressed i feel so bad for him!!

stannnnn nat

back on watch? what does that mean...

omg tony is so drunkkkkkk nooooo

ohhhhh tonyyyyy noooo come onnnn

you’re so drunk dude stopppp

god tony you’re so drunk pleaseee

wait why is rhodey fighting him anyway?

wow this is my 101 comment today and i’ve only watched 20 mins today

omggggg people are recordingggg this isn’t gonna end well

*sighs* oh god tony dont yell at them whyyyyy

omg tonys in the fire place!!!

omg that just happened. they just fired at each other.

also just saying tony, he does have what it takes to be war machine cause he continues to be...

ohhhh is tony okay??

im confused tho why did they start fighting in the first place?

okay i just looked it up, it was because he was being irresponsible and drunk, and putting people at the party in danger, and he wouldnt stop

ngl its getting kinda tiring to keep updating this but i’m gonna keep going cause i want this record for myself, and i’m not gonna quit something

ok i’m gonna continue the movie tmrw cause its prob gonna be a snow day (lol i left off at 111)

[cupcakeshakesnake]

Watching The Return of Doctor Mysterio for the first time

Ayyyy long title.

-SERIES 10!!! SERIES 10 IS HERE!!!!!!!

-SDALDFHGALSDHFGAS,LDHFASLDFGASLDFHASLDJFGASLDHFALS

-LASGFLERN283WQUR’QSEI;RWQER;WIERXIUI;I::weif:weif:eifE;IQUGWIF

-*cough* okay... Let’s watch this

-(I just realized the episode I’m watching is flipped horizontally because of copyrights or something, so the screenshots are gonna be flipped too because I’m too lazy to edit them)

-Ah, this takes place in the U.S.

-WUT

-What’s swinging outside his window

-DOCTOR WHAT ARE YOU DOING

-Well this is a dangerous situation for him, I doubt that even Timelords can regenerate if they fell from the sixtieth floor, there would be no piece of body big enough to regenerate from

-Pardon me if I’m wrong on that though, I’m not the best at Doctor Who science

-His voice what happened to his voice

-WELL OF COURSE CLARK KENT IS SUPERMAN DOCTOR PLEASE KEEP UP WITH AT LEAST SOME OF THE MEDIA

-Well this is a weird start to an episode

-”Vomiting, hair loss and death, fat lot of use.”

-What is that those

-”How did you even get a glass of water in your pocket?”  “Skills.”

-I’m calling it, his pockets are bigger on the inside.

-All this fucking Christmas shit again

-Annnd I’m dead

-But seriously, I grew up in an un-religious household in Asia and Christmas was just this little holiday with trees and presents and--

-GEMSTONES THEY’RE TALKING ABOUT GEMSTONEs I should shut up

- --Anyway it was this little holiday with trees and presents and department store sales--

- -- HOLY SHIT DID HE EAT IT

-"What are you, 36?”  “Eight.”

- --AHEM anyway yeah, that little holiday, and--

-HE’S FLOATING??!?! WHO THIS? WHAT?

- -- UGHHH anyway, yeah. I grew up with that and then there��s this Western Christmas culture where it’s such a big thing and it’s, just, really, strange.  Initially that little rant was gonna be a bit longer and better articulated, but interesting things kept happening in the show.

-”YOU’RE A SUPERHEROOOOOOO”

-IS THAT NARDOLE

-Okay what is happening and what is wrong with these people

-BRAINS WTF

-Why do science fiction lights always turn on so loudly

-”Donated to the facility by our benefactors”  “DONATED”  yeah.  Looks like he murdered those benefactors after all.

-What’s the Doctor even eating

10/10 face

-What’s with the guy coughing blue milk

-WHAT

-For some reason I am inclined to pet this brain creature (pf which, by the way, I failed to upload a screenshot because everything else would be uploaded except that image, even with the quality lowered), but because there are many hideous monsters in Doctor Who that are not to be judged by their appearance, I’ll keep a neutral opinion on this guy until further progress in the plot is made to prove either its hostility or its friendliness.

-Yep, I’m not petting you, brain dude. You’re not friendly. You get no pet.

-”I had a change of mind”  WAS THE JOKE REALLY NECESSARY

-And were those surgeons just standing there doing nothing 24/7 until someone came in

-WELL THIS IS TERRIFYING ALRIGHT

-Who’s the writer again... *takes a look* Yep, Steven Moffat.

-”No one will believe that, this is America.”

-”Special Agent Dam Dangerous Schgsfilurfylas”  My English hearing’s not the best, okay

-Dude’s hand is shaking, that yells terrible aim

-”o on, tell them you shot us in the back for self-defense.”

-Heyoooo, it’s the boy with the glasses, except he’s not wearing glasses anymore and I’m NOT talking about Harry Potter.

-God damn I wish someone would turn down that guy’s accent, it’s like he has a swollen tongue and is trying to decide whether to spit out or chew a hot piece of bacon

-Where did Nardole even come from

-Heyooo

-WHY DID THAT KID GROW UP TO SOUND LIKE EVERY PARODY OF BATMAN’S VOICE EVER

-Flashback?

-So is he gonna sh-t out the gemstone or

-nevermind what I just said

-HE GREW UP WITH A THESAURUS AS WELL APPARENTLY

Pffft

-what’s with the wind noises

The Doctor with a baby is the best thing ever, it doesn’t even matter which reincarnation he’s in

-BUT WHAT’S WITH THE WIND NOISES

-Nardole with that elephant lol

-Wait... Isn’t that the reporter girl?

-WHAT IS WITH THE FRICKING WIND

-ACTUALLY I JUST REALIZED THAT THIS WIND SOUND SPANS ACROSS THE ENTIRETY OF THE EPISODE, IT’S NOT THE EPISODE ITSELF IT’S THE GUY WHO UPLOADED IT

-OR SOMETHING

-GOD I WAS FREAKING OUT ABOUT THIS STUPID THING

-IT HURTS MY EARS

-I’M WEARING HEADPHONES AND THIS WIND NOISE IS TORTURE

-X-ray vision would actually be great because everyone would be spooky scary skeles

A HA HA HA HA HA

-Did the Doctor just drink alcohol from that bottle

-Yep, he’s getting wasted

-*unholy squealawking* ”This is Mr Huffle. Mr Huffle feels pain. Meet me in the kitchen.”  what the fuck was that

-I DON’T LIKE THIS WOMAN NOR THAT LITTLE RUBBER DOLL

-I DON’T LIKE YOU AT ALL

-I HOPE YOUR LITTLE MR HUFFLE DRAGS YOU DOWN INTO HIS SPECIAL HELL WITH YOU

-You can just see how those soulless eyes of his are begging for the sweet release of death

Wake me up (wake me up inside) Can’t wake up (wake me up inside) save me

-He is screaming, free me, free me, free me from this pain

-look here lady you are clearly very clever and all but you better close your bedroom doors securely at night and make sure that lil guy is outside or you might never wake up one day

-Change of subject: I thought this guy would be the one called Dr Mysterio but instead it turns out he’s called the Ghost. Not this Ghost either.

(Image from Star Wars Rebels)

-The deathly stare of Mr Huffle is refusing to leave my mind, help, what do I do, I have been cursed

RUN DOCTOR RUN, HE BLAMES YOU AS WELL AS HER

DOCTOR: THE HORROR GAME Do not let him look into your eyes!

-IT’S THOSE OPEN BRAIN MEN FROM HUSBANDS OF RIVER SONG, THEY’RE BACK AT IT WTF

-”Good to keep an open mind, ha!”

“I am totally against bantering.”-

-Ah, back when his floof was still flat, calm and level one.

-Woohoo speech

-WAIT WHAT THE TARDIS SHOWS UP AT WHISTLES TOO

-Oh, so that’s why that guy’s wearing jewels in the trailer, I tought he was always like that.

-And apparently the Doctor got him out of the robot king to keep him as a companion.

-”I’m not avoiding anything, I’m just trying to save a planet.”  “Which is what you always do when the conversation turns serious.”

-”Hello Doctor nice suit”  “Hi”  “Good morning”  “Whatever”  “So uh.. what happened to Clara”  “WHOOPS GOTTA GO SAVE A PLANET BYE”

-Bet that guy wanted to rip his shirt open to reveal the supersuit inside for years

-Why are they suddenly in Japan

-”I flooded downstairs with Pokemon.”  1. I laughed at that bit in the trailer, but it’s somehow even funnier considering they’re in Japan.  2. BBC doesn’t even care about copyrights anymore. In fact, they haven’t careed for quite a while.  3. favorite scene in the episode so far.

-FUCKING TEA

-WELL IF THIS ISN’T BRITAIN

-Oh yeah, brilliant plan, have the creepy stare-y surgeons march along down the street in a line, no one will ever notice

-An ambulance? Okay, less stupid plan

-Random question: Why are those guys’ heads split diagonally and not vertically or horizontally? It gets on my nerves. Besides, what if one of them is left handed?

-That mask reveal took a turn, and uh  but uh  “Grant, the man I took for granted”  SHE’S MAKING PUNS EVEN WHILE GRIEVING

-That’s awkward

-”What do the rich old men always do when the fighting starts? They’ll find the safest place to hide themselves away and send all the young people to die.”  I feel bad that this is too true to be taken lightly.

-”Oh, there’s the smile, I don’t like the smile!”

-”You’re completely out of your mind!”  “How is that news to anyone?”  I love the dialogue in this episode

-WOOHOO

-”He’s actually left handed”  So I was right, crackheads can’t be left handed?

-GRANT, THE BOMB

-Welp

giving up on life like

The Doctor’s having none of your shit

sarcasm.jpg

-WHOA BITCH THAT HEAD IS BLANK

-”Put in a call to Osgood.” Nice reference.

-WHOOPS THAT SOLDIER

-”I’ve been away for a while but I’m back”  Also nice reference to the previous episode (that I CRIED ABOUT)

-DAMMIT STOP TORMENTING MR HUFFLE IF YOU WISH TO AVOID A PAINFUL DEATH

-OH GOD NO

SHE’S PASSING THE CURSE TO THE DOCTOR

-HE MUST BE SAVED

-REBLOG TO PASS THE CURSE TO SOMEONE ELSE OR WHATEVER

-#SAVETHEDOCTOR2017

-OH DEAR GOD THE CURSE IS WITH HIM, NONONONONO DOCTOR DON’T TAKE IT WITH YOU SHE’S TRYING TO DEFLECT ITS RAGE TOWARDS YOU

The... shirt... That’s a first.

-Oh jeebuz crisxenz now Mr Huffle is in the Tardis and he will bring bad luck to us all and he will be the reason we will be crying in any future episode ever and he will cause Twelve’s regeneration mark my words

-Dear Lord protect us

-Oh wait Moffat’s not gonna protect us is he

-We’re screwed

[coffeeandcalligraphy]

Old Writing #5 | Cringe-Worthy Excerpts

Hey People of Earth!

So @sarahkelsiwrites and I decided to play a little game called Search Up a Random Word in Your Book and Share The Cringiest Excerpt. Basically, she’s generating a random word, and then we both look through alllllll of our book projects and share the cringiest lines. I’m actually going to share excerpts from all my finished works, AKA, on top of my 7 real novels, I’ll be sharing from my other ‘books’ as well. So 10 rounds of cringe.

Check out Sarah’s post HERE.

These are all unedited. I didn’t touch ‘em for this game.

Enjoy.

NUMBER ONE:

Book: Sophie and Jake (2014)

(yo look at that quality title tho)

Word searched: Chance

Excerpt:

“If I didn’t do it, she would kill me and you herself. She made me do it as a last chance thing. I can barely kill and animal let alone a human. I was no use for the program. But I have extreme skill. So this was my test.”

I ALMOST HAD A HEART-ATTACK CRINGING.

Also, I wrote this ‘book’ by hand. Wtf, 12-year-old Rachel, wtf.

NUMBER TWO:

Book: The Dreamer (2014)

(look at that top notch title, girl)

Word searched: Scratching (don’t have scratching, only have scratches)

Excerpt:

Her insults don’t dig deep wounds. They’re more like scratches.

REKT

Wrote this by hand too... Twice...

WHY?

NUMBER THREE:

Book: The Treated (2014)

(up your title game, pls)

Word searched: Have

Excerpt:

You know, I’m all for sharing some top-quality cringe with you. So I’m sharing two excerpts. You’re welcome.

“Meg. Don’t look in the future. Look in the now. We have right now. We have this moment, together.”

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

“No really, please stop that. If you make me laugh, I have to think of sadness to stop, and my sadness is Colt, and I seriously don’t want to think about him.”

Gotta think ‘bout that sadness tho.

NUMBER FOUR:

Book: Perks and Drawbacks (2014)

(seriously, I’m filing a complaint against your shitty-ass titles)

Word searched: Here

Excerpt:

“You know, it’s taken me forever to realize this. Lots of struggles to get here. Life’s hard I guess. But dealing with life alongside the people you love, makes it a good bit easier. So thank you, for being the light of my world, and the moon to my stars.”

Hi. My name is Rachel. I’ve just died from a cringe-attack. Leave a message at the beep.

THE LIGHT OF MY WORLD AND THE MOON TO MY STARS LOOOOOOOOOOOL.

NUMBER FIVE:

(Side note: Anything Foster says from the FOSTERED books is cringy. JUST SAYING)

Book: Fostered (2014)

Word searched: Deep

Excerpt: (look at my boyssss. Foster + Ris)

“Hey, I was just asking you know, look, I’m sorry and all about calling your British friend mate and all but–” “Phillip. His name was Phillip.” Foster spits, the sharp edge of his words cutting deep. “Back off Foster, I’m just trying to help you out here. I’m just trying to–”

That use of italics is so annoying, like what are you doing???

NUMBER SIX:

Book: This Is Where The End Starts (2014)

(thanks 4 kind of fixing that title game bro)

Word searched: Nothing

Excerpt:

“Oh, nothing, just internally seething, no big deal.” She says with a fake smile, plopping down into the booth. Ethan gives her her ice cream and smiles, the act coming across extremely awkward looking.

#girliinternallyseethetoo

#extremelyawkwardlooking

NUMBER SEVEN:

Book: Hunted (FOSTERED #2,) (2015) 

(girl, come on, you were on a roll with the titles, what happened)

Word searched: Wishing

Excerpt:

I feel the blood accumulate in my mouth and I turn straight to where her feet are situated and spit it all right at the tip of her boots. “Oh you little–” she starts but Lonan juts out a hand, cutting her off mid step. “Enough.” He hisses and I’m sure he’s directing the message to the both of us and right now, I’m wishing I could shoot up and claw her eyeballs out and leave nothing but hanging, bleeding sockets behind.

Yup. I wrote that. Like a boss.

#fetusLonan

#ohyoulittle

#bleedingsockets

#thatshouldbeabandname

NUMBER EIGHT:

Book: Resisted (FOSTERED #3) (2015)

(In response to the title thing: I fell off the track, now I can't go back / I'm not like that.)

(This is exactly what happened. I shit you not.)

Word searched: Spot

Excerpt:

“You really think you have the right to speak to me like that, don’t you?” Kate rises from her spot, snatches my collar and tugs me closer to her. “Listen you little reject, I don’t know where the hell you came from and nor do I give a shit. Lonan trusts me–” I can’t help but roll my eyes at her, yank out of her grip. “So that’s what this is about, huh? Loner?” I cock my eyebrow up and laugh when she paints bright red.

#youlittlerejectshouldalsobeabandname

NUMBER NINE:

Book: I’m Disappointed (2015)

(Using the original draft for maximum cringe.)

Word searched: Facing

Excerpt:

“Okay fine,” She puts her hand on my shoulder and takes a step closer to me, and the next thing that happens is so fast, that I barely have the stupid brain to process it. Sydney’s pressed up onto her toes so she’s just at my height, and she kisses my cheek. Her other hand slides from my face to my hand, and she lets go cinematically, and spins towards the door so her back is facing me. My face burns right as she turns her head so I can see it in profile. “Now come and find me.” She whispers.

Oh god this is so freaking cringy and I don’t even think I changed it that much holy god rip me. CRINGE 4 LYFE

#sheletsgosoundslikeapoppunkbandnamejustsayin

I’M LITERALLY CRINGING SO HARD AHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGH

CLIFFORD WHY DID YOU LET ME WRITE THAT.

CLIFFORD WHY.

(I’m editing this post right now, and can’t even bring myself to read it. That’s how bad this is arghhhh whyyyy.)

NUMBER TEN:

(Sarah ran out of projects so I’m on my own!)

Book: Hollowed (FOSTERED #4) (2016)

Word searched: Course

Excerpt:

Oh dear god. This is pretty cringy. I’m like hella ashamed rn.

LOL.

“Yes, yes of course it hurts like absolute hell–but I don’t care! Foster, I can feel again, and not just bits and pieces–I can feel all of it. Every muscle that twitches, every twist my skin makes.”

I hope you’re laughing at me right now.

Just be nice and laugh at me.

NUMBER ELEVEN:

Book Fostered #5 (2017!)

Word searched: Pity

Excerpt:

And now they’re all looking at me like this. With this overwhelming amount of pity covering their irises.

You know, this one’s pretty funny because I wrote this a couple weeks ago (actually, maybe a week and a half or two weeks ago), and when I edited it, I cringed so hard, literally thought about changing it, and didn’t it. (Because Rachel was lazy, why would you do that, Rachel.)

So I’m going to print out the paperback with this line in it and not edit it out.

Remember to cover your irises with pity, kids. ;)

Alright! So that’s it for this one! I hope you enjoyed laughing at me! I sure did. This was super fun to put together, and was a pretty sweet break from all the writing I’ve done today. If any of you would like to do this, go ahead, and make sure to tag @sarahkelsiwrites​ and I. If you think you can beat this cringe, I’d love to see!

Thanks for reading as always. :)

--Rachel

[chrisescobar-social-blog]

Challen Park Meet by LM.Meets on November 18, 2018

Instructions:

Welcome to Chris Escobars gallery for the Challen Park Meet hosted by the amazing @ladymehanphoto. If you were sent this link, then you are one lucky person. You were chosen to be a part of this wonderful movement called “Helping Each Other Grow” or #HEOG (latin for “HUGE”, not really) I just wanted you to pay attention for a second. I need you to pay attention because I took a lot of time to edit these photos, so if you could just take some time to read this, it would mean the world to me, and it WILL help you grow as an artist.

So first things first, if you’re like me then you like to look at all of the photos in the book first before you start reading, so check out all of the photos that I took at the photomeet down below.

After you are done looking at them, continue reading if you liked at least 1 of these photos.

If you didn’t like any of them then close this out, this is not for you.

Quick Tip: Tap or click on the image to see it in full resolution.

Continue reading if you want to download any of these photos in Full Resolution.

In the Images: @petite_mystique, @daskiimmy, @deathbecomesher_ @capria_kodachrome , @lydiazelmac, @thegracielacey, @clarkesurrey, @aztec_buttercup, @lordshyne

Huge Thank You to everyone that participated, you gave us the opportunity to grow!

Whether you are a model, photographer, makeup artist, hair stylist, designer… whatever you are, you are very much appreciated in the community. Well at least I think so, if I didn’t then I have no idea why I am writing this. I guess I just really care about all of you, and I really care about helping you continue to grow. I keep using this word “grow” and I just want to clarify that, by grow I mean expanding your network to work with real professionals.

Have you ever dreamed of working with some of your biggest inspirations, or dreamed of making more money doing what you love, or dreamed of just living the American Dream?

I dreamed once, and then made my dreams come true.

For those of you who don’t know me, I’ve been on big movie sets, I’ve been on big commercial sets, I’ve hustled the same way you are currently hustling. I started at the very bottom and worked my way up to the top.

But I am NOT here to brag about it, not here to gloat, showboat, or here to taunt you.

I am here to help you. “Chris, why are you trying to help anyone, when you could easily be making some great money doing what you love?”

Well, let me tell you a little bit of my story for you to fully understand.

I started doing what I love when I was 15 years old, which is Dance, Film, and Photography. I was in High School, so I did it part time. I really really really sucked. I thought I was good, but looking at those pictures today, I want to puke. I am 26 years old as of June 13, 2018.

I started working for Del Taco at age 16, that was my first job.

After High School, I went to college to learn Film and Photography, more in depth. I dropped out 2 years later because I couldn’t afford it anymore. However, I still always had a full time job that I fell back on.

Since the age of 16 I always had a stable job and income. It was great financially, but heartbreaking emotionally because I HATED and DREADED going to work at a place that has nothing to do with my passion. Full of people that only care about numbers and money, I did this for 10 years! I worked a regular job, and tried my best to get photo or video gigs, but I was only able to get about 1 paid gig every few months.

This year was the year I decided to take the risk of diving in face first, into becoming a full time creator. It was not easy, and it still isn’t.

But I am doing it, I am finally living the dream I have always dreamed of.

“Chris, How are you doing it? Do you have some really good connections? Could you help Me Do It?”

I would absolutely love to show you how to do it. For FREE too. I want to show you everything I know about photography. I want to show you everything I know about videography, cinema, dance…

I believe in each and every one of you, I believe that you could be the next big artist. I believe you could be the person I want to hire when I work on another big project.

I am tired of everyone saying or thinking they are better than someone else. NO, we are all the same, only difference is some people are more skilled than others.

I am tired of artists comparing each other to other artists. I am tired of Judgement and hatred. I am tired of people hating just because they don’t like what they see.

What do I mean?

There are models that are fat, skinny, tall, short, round, square, purple, orange, clear… WTF, Clear? (Yea, we don’t have rules on how clear a product is when we do commercial photography)

The people behind the camera are fat, skinny, tall, short…

There is no rules… Who says you have to live up to a standard that someone else made up?

You’re gonna live your life living up to a set of rules that someone else made up?

Most of you beat yourselves up like if words actually mean something. Stop IT!

“But Chris, I was always called names and bullied and punked because I don’t look perfect.”

Yea so was I, and you know what I did? I told them “Close your eyes then”

If you don’t like what I look like, or if you don’t like what my art looks like, then close your eyes and imagine it being perfect. I was made to look the way I look, I’m sorry you don’t like the look of a person, or a human. I made this art to look the way it looks because I like it. If you don’t like it, then don’t look at it.

So what does this have to do with being successful in my career choice?

Well, if someone doesn’t like you for your looks, or a photo of you, or a photo you took. Then the answer is simple, THEY DON’T CARE ABOUT YOU.

If you are judging someone by the way they look, their race, their size, their skills, their art, then you don’t care about networking.

Talking to people is the absolute best way to meet people that are professionals or going to become professionals. You never know who knows who, and if you judge someone negatively, then it will bite you in the ass in the future.

Why do you think the bad guys always lose in the movies, because the people that judge are the “Dark Side”.

So you should really think about who is in your circle and cut anyone that doesn’t support you and your decisions to continue to do what you love. If you have 1,000 followers on IG and only 20 people are liking your photos, even though you can clearly see in your analytics that you made over 400 impressions, then a lot of those people don’t care about you.

The LIKE button should actually be a “I CARE” button. (Password for the photos: I Care)

Because if you actually liked something, that means you care about it.

Example, I like Eminem.

Some of you would say Eminem is the best, but some of you would say Eminem is stupid.

And if I posted a photo of Eminem and I, I would get likes from anyone that is an Eminem fan. No likes from Eminem haters.

But you know that I like Eminem, and you know that it’s something I am proud of. So why can’t you just support?

Same goes with our art, you know that I love what I created, but you can’t support just because you are judging something, or comparing it to something else?

The Message I am trying to spread is, without the support of your peers, you are nothing. And if you are judging anyone, then you are not supporting either. If you are judging, you are destroying the industry that everyone is working hard to keep alive. If you are not supporting one another, then you are being selfish.

It takes .000001 second to tap a like button, 5 seconds to type something meaningful in the comments, and the person will appreciate what you did and remember that you are a true supporter if you continue to support. Then when that person gets the skills needed to become a professional or needs someone to be a part of something big, they will remember you.

As much as we remember every negative thing said about us, we also remember every positive thing said about us.

So if you want to be successful, remember that we all have flaws, lets not point them out and move forward. Let’s Build each other up, not down.

We have the television to tell us the bad news, we have each other to tell us the good news.

Thank you so much for reading all of that, I know it’s a lot, and to be honest I could keep going but I don’t want to lose you. We need to spread this message because some people just don’t get it and those are the ones dragging all of us down. We are people, not adjectives, adjectives shouldn’t have the power to hurt people.

If you would like, you can download these photos here ——————-> Click Here

-Chris Escobar

[ethelbertpaul444-blog]

5 WTF Ways Trump Has Been Immortalized As Artwork

It wasn’t his knowledge of programme, his allure, or anything remotely leadership-like that led to the notoriety of Donald Trump. If anything, it was the ease and willingness with which he shifted himself into a walk-to meme, terminated with a fandom hectic originating fanfiction, love speculations( i.e. insane scheme presumptions ), and, of course, tons of bad fan art. Now are some of the weirdest and wildest slice in the current Trumpian artwork action for “youve got to” absorb before they find their way into the National Portrait Gallery. 5 Deep Dream Trump Is Pure Nightmare Fuel While computers are getting better at all that is induces humans so special( like opening openings ), there is one domain where we’ll always using them to outstrip: logical thinking. After all, it’s hard to have a sense of whimsy when a misplaced semicolon can return you into scrap. In information, a very close we’ve come to causing computers a life of unadulterated resource is through “deep learning” — software that resembled how our neutrons shoot and is perhaps the future of artificial intelligence. And like better now humans, we threw computers the knack of originality, merely to squander it on monstrosities like this TAGEND Chris Rodley That’s why you don’t share a teleporter with Muppets. div > This is a penetrating learning interpretation of one of Donald Trump’s lineage photos. And if you’re wondering why Melania looks like Miss Piggy on her action to her third divorce, that’s on purpose. This art is submitted in accordance with artist Chris Rodley plugging photographs of Donald Trump into a deep learn algorithm which was also “looking for images from Sesame Street . ” The outcome is this hellscape of unused faces, googly hearts, and wandering entrusts — plus elements from Sesame Street . Chris Rodley Courtesy of Industrial Light and Horror. It could be a lot worse, though. You could be looking at a video of Trump transformed into an awakened eldritch fright contending against the confines of our universe TAGEND Though on the plus line-up, Trump’s hair has never glanced more in its element. Eric Cheng/ YouTube Oh, like you’ve never had a wookiee sexuality dream. This nightmare fuel was brought into countries around the world by Eric Cheng, who said he formed it by plugging a video of a Trump speech into a penetrating learning algorithm that was simultaneously thinking about Cthulhu. The tier of Cthulhu influence was governed by the volume at which Trump was speaking. We’re lucky that it was one of his quieter rantings. If it had been about minorities or women, that video might have accidentally opened a wormhole into the domain of the Elder Ones. 4 All Hail God-Emperor Trump ! div> To a lot of internet manbabies, Trump is the eventual badass. He’s an ass-kicker and a risk-taker, a street fighter and shot-caller, the person who sets the Big Mac into Mack Daddy. Of course, in order to maintain that panorama of Trump, you have to constantly reject all of actuality . Fortunately, the internet boys help find a direction to readily block out the pesky true by superseding it with hardcore sci-fi devotee story! div > Meet God-Emperor Trump, may his choked arteries reign for infinity. Based on the lore of the favourite tabletop gaming universe Warhammer 40,000 , which is set in a ludicrously dystopian future, the cruddy back of the internet is filled with portraits of Trump as the iconic Ruler of Mankind, immortal lord of the human rights empire wreaking his never-ending fight to the undesirables. Experiences like wit, right? It isn’t. via The Flama via The Flama His armor appears to be made from the Ark of the Covenant, which is suitable, because it starts us want to melt our faces off. div > Sure, it’s pretty weird to pick an terrifying deity of fighting as the avatar for a buster who consumed alleged bone spurs as an excuse to get out of military imperative, but that’s where the total disenchantment comes in. via r/ Warhammer4 0k Robokoboto/ Art Abyss Carrying the skulls of his own allies doesn’t seem ominous at all. div > Read Next Teach Kids The Alphabet With These Medieval Death Prints But the likenes isn’t flattering for either slope. Testifying again that they have the racial revelation of someone who’s been in a lethargy since the ‘6 0s, Trump fanboys seem to not realize that this Emperor of Mankind is nothing more than a freakish monster whose “shattered, crumbling body can no longer reinforce life, ” or that his guideline gave rise to “technological and cultural rights stagnation, and a regression into totalitarianism, belief and religion obfuscation and intolerance.” So God-Emperor Trump is based on some creep who rulers over a dystopia in which mindless, alien-hating radicals sacrifice thousands daily to keep the bloated body of their oppressor ruler get. Maybe they did do their research after all. And to employ the cherry on the foolish neo-Nazi cake, the God-Emperor isn’t, uhm … grey. He was born in center Anatolia( Turkey) in 8,000 BC. Meaning the web fascists have made their white dominance superstar into a space-age Middle Eastern king. Warhammer 40 k Oh yeah, this guy is totes going to preserve the white race, you dolts. 3 The New “Alt-Right” Cartoon Mascot Affection Dressing Up As Trump You already know about Pepe, the cute comic book frog who became a hate representation. But since Pepe has come extremely mainstream, hardcore “alt-right” dudes have created a perfect mascot for the new Trump age: a poorly attracted copyright infringement. via Will Sommer/ Medium “Racist Frog, Reclining Nude” This corpulent little shit-grinner is Groyper. No, that’s not a Trump-inspired new Pokemon( although we understand the confusion ). We’re speak about Groyper the Frog, the MS Paint cartoon mascot for hardcore politicos . He even comes in numerous charming outfits for supporters to represent dress-up with( dog whistle sold separately ). There’s Papa John Groyper TAGEND via Slate “These chests actually contain Thirsty Howie’s.” div > Hulk Hogan Groyper TAGEND via Will Sommer/ Medium Even a special edition “Are you piqued yet? ” Burka Groyper TAGEND via Slate Don’t try to make sense of it. That channel madness lies. div > But amongst the favorite flavors of Groyper stands Trump Groyper, somehow searching less slimy as a lumpy frog TAGEND via Will Sommer/ Medium And the imitation mane on the phony Trump-toad glances little stupid than the real fuzz on the real Trump-golem. So if you’re wondering why all the worst accounts on Twitter swopped up their avatars to this, that’s why. It’s unquestionably not because Matt Furie, the inventor of Pepe, has started litigating the lily-white laces off of any popular enough website for copyright violation. No, it’s because Pepe isn’t refrigerate enough anymore. Not like Groyper, who’s too cool for clas — art school, specifically. Donald Trump/ Twitter 2 The Anti-Obama Oil Painter Now Remembers Trump Is The New Messiah Jon McNaughton is possibly one of history’s greatest masters. Not because he started anything magnificent or profound or thought-provoking, attention, but because his use are some of the goddamn funniest a few examples of theological right-wing bathos. Jon McNaughton First and foremost, why would you plant a tree three hoofs in front a target where people will be sitting? This lovely depict, entitled You Are Not Forgotten , boasts Herr Conditioner and attests that you can’t draw Trump look warm and charisma even if you choose him yourself. But the real glamour of McNaughton’s art lies in the fact that he’s merely a really, genuinely hacky government cartoonist with a better graze stroke tournament. He often boasts about the number of “symbols” he manages to stuff into a single canvas. Now, the topic is unity. That’s why a not-that-keen eye can will recognise that Everyman Trump is tower over a working-class kinfolk( whom he’s fastened) as they embed a flower( which he’s fucking kill) in front of a gather of veterans and soldiers( whom he dishonors ), disabled population( whom he doesn’t care about ), black people( whom he doesn’t like ), various cabinet members( whom he’s shelled ), police officers( whom he’s slandered ), and laborers( whom he doesn’t wage ). div > But McNaughton didn’t determine his refer by trimming half a dozen inches off of Trump’s waist. He became a republican beloved by taking drops on President Obama for a solid eight years. Here’s his interpretation of Obama’s domestic policy TAGEND Jon McNaughton Did you acknowledge the 9/11 symbolism? The situation that happened seven years before Obama was president, when a Republican was in office? His foreign policy TAGEND Jon McNaughton To be fair, Los Alamos does have a really nice golf course. div > His stance on Obamacare TAGEND Jon McNaughton There goes the plan for National Treasure 3. And here again is that classic, boasting Obama trampling over the rights of the very same working man who Trump will later save while all the good Republican chairpeople are screaming at him TAGEND Jon McNaughton “But I wanted to flora a tree there … “ div > Man, Obama really seems like a dick in these likeness. We’re amazed that the nuclear detonation didn’t feign his golf move, or that he escaped unharmed after dipping the Physique in napalm and placing it alight in his hand, although that’s to be expected when you’re Literally Satan. His abilities are truly ceaseless, as is his cruelty … as demonstrated by that time he pressured a soldier to eat a slice of a lesbian uniting cake. Jon McNaughton “It’s not even ice cream cake. Thanks, Obama.” Save us, President Trump! Save us from that tricky black sn- oh, you already have. Jon McNaughton There is an extremely famous pennant advising against this very thing! 1 Barron Trump, Manga Star While Trump himself has a unusually divisive sort of popularity, the same can’t tell me about the Trump brats — Ivanka, Donnie Jr ., and the one who looks like a hardboiled egg with a cheek gather on it. His spawn are nigh-universally humiliated, persistently putting their hoofs in those cavities they can’t ever seem to fully close. But one Trump kid is exempt from this ridicule: Barron, the unassuming, sweet-looking 12 -year-old who actually has to live in the White House with his mom and dad. Doing entertaining of a kid is not the nicest stuff to do, so two feelings masters have gone the other direction, trying to delve into the mind of this quiet son and figuring out the uproar he was required to impression from having the most powerful awful father-god in the whole world — in spectacular manga shape, natch. Yuusuke Hori “At least it’s not a racist amphibian.” div > This very melodramatic segment was announced by master Yuusuke Hori right after Trump’s inauguration. It testifies Barron in sparkly bishonen structure with a designation that reads “My loud, vexing dad is president, so the placid unassuming life I missed is totally over.” It was merely signified as a silly mockup blanket, but because it came insanely popular, we eventually got the for-realsies The Adventures Of Barron And His Loud-Mouthed President Father , i> and it’s everything we’ve ever wanted. Joy Ling Well, except for Trump not to be president, but still. To all the non-otaku out there, TAOBAHLMPF ( created by Brooklyn-based artist Joy Ling) envisions Barron, who really really was intended to “watch Netflix and play Pokemon, ” teaming with Sasha and Malia Obama to solve the puzzle bordering a “mysterious anomaly” that appeared after his father took office — which is not a polite method to refer to Kellyanne Conway. We don’t want to give away too many spoilers, but one of the central conflicts revolves around Barron trying to persuade his father to help situated events right. Oh, that’s liberty, Donald Jerwillickers Trump makes an appearance, or at least the DJT from the universe where he doesn’t is argued that exercising is a liberal scheme to sap his treasured bodily fluids. Joy Ling “Please don’t tell me which flui-“ “Semen.” Adam Wears is on Twitter and Facebook, and has a newsletter about chilling history that you should definitely subscribe to . i> Art is great for telling some of the tension out, in case that’s a occasion you need to do in this day and age, so maybe pick up some Bob Ross oil depicts ? b > i> Support Cracked’s journalism with a tour to our Contribution Page. Please and thank you . b > i> For more, check out 8 Hilariously Offensive Artworks Featuring Famous Presidents and 5 Unsettling Sub-Genres Of Fan Art Lurking On The Internet . b > i> Follow us on Facebook, and we’ll follow you everywhere . b > i> Read more: http :// www.cracked.com/ article_2 5547 _5-wtf-ways-trump-has-been-immortalized-as-artwork. html http://dailybuzznetwork.com/index.php/2018/05/31/5-wtf-ways-trump-has-been-immortalized-as-artwork/

[clifi-journal-blog]

Loosed Upon the World I

Looking at the Saga Anthology of Climate Fiction

Introduction:

TL;DR: We think it’s not gonna happen to us. We thought wrong. Here’s our attempt at making fiction make things seem more real. Humanize the threat.

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“Welcome to the end of the world, already in progress” (xi)—focus on already in progress, see CC. There’s no clear beginning or end, but for sure we are amidst massive climate upheaval.

“Fiction is a powerful tool for helping us contextualize the world around us.” – s/o at fiction for being able to help us understand what’s up.

Foreword:

TL;DR: Lust for techno-fix—instant gratification, instant solution. Oh, how fucking human. We keep avoiding the real problem and thinking oh yeah we’ll just go to Mars or something sci-fi like that. Multiple fantasies exists; there are stories that warn you about the dangers of climate change and then there are those that will defo tell you it isn’t real.

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“If you were to live in that world…that might make an impact” (XIII) well, you think it means nothing b/c it’s not happening to you. INDIFFERENCE.

“It’s interesting that by creating a made-up world, you can show the real world more sharply and clearly” (XIV)—fiction is how we make sense of the world, ironically, forces us to empathize. A million is a statistic, one is a tragedy.

[About “feel-good technology” advertised to combat climate change] “They are, in fact, fiction, or if you really want to stick the knife in—fantasy” (XV)—less realistic than the possibilities embodied in the stories is the idea that one device can fix all these damages that we have done to the environment.

Shooting the Apocalypse, Paolo Bacigalupi

TL;DR: Timo and Lucy find trying to get some good scoop, comes across the reality of what happens when water becomes scarce. Sacrifices, fights, treason, all that BS, all about the Central Arizona Project. These people were getting ready to go to war, an army against the apocalypse—the end of the world, without water, a basic necessity.

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“All anyone wants to do is tell their story, Timo. They need to know they matter.” – the power of storytelling in community and world-building (of how we interpret the world around us)

The Myth of the Rain, Seanan McGuire

TL;DR: Climate change’s effect on the local fauna (ft. migration, tourism, and the rich getting everything at the expense of the poor, of the marginalize who suffer the most even though they didn’t do as much damage as the rich people did). God Complex, manicured nature, “the great outdoors” and by doing our job, we pat ourselves in the back and say, well done.

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“Forget the poor. Forget the disenfranchised. They were the ones who had done the least to destroy the world as we’d known it for so long, and now they were the ones being left behind.” – see CC, CWC, why are those countries that contributed the least amount of pollution the ones suffering the most? Unfair.

“When the world catches fire, something has to burn” – s/o at THG series, see: very dystopian society, see: role of government intervention, and how someone has to take the consequences of it all.

“Humanity was the architect of its own destruction” (34)—we did this to ourselves. Architect= design, artificiality, we designed our own end.

“Was it mercy or arrogance…Did we have the right?” (36)—God Complex, roots back to Adam and Eve and control of environment.

OUTER RIMS, Toiya Kristen Finley

TL;DR: Mother helps this dude who’s sick, ends up getting infected. Everyone in family dies in hospital with the rest of the others.

Key Quotes and what’s up: “No one regretted last chances unless they weren’t taken” (39)—BIG MOOD, mother nature @ us, “only know you love her when you let her go”

KHELDYU, Karl Schroeder

TL;DR: Bro and sis fight about how to save the world, b/c one lowkey doing it for his own good and sis is like wtf?? And sis’s friend works for the bro and it’s all complicated af, but in the end, basically try to contain the damages of the bro’s plan.

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“industrial logic. About what happened when the natural world became an abstraction, and the only reality was the system you were building” (71)—see Foreword and world building through fictions and the stories we tell, also see L2DIE and system mentality.

THE SNOWS OF YESTERYEAR, Jean-Louis Trudel

TL;DR: Making a business out of saving the word; rescuing the old professor. Sins of before come to haunt us now, but sorta happy ending= we aren’t as doomed after all= ISOLATED events, guy from Ontario love story lol

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“Saving the world would have to yield dividends to catch this group’s attention” (71) profitability of green tech otherwise it’s useless, no one cares if you can’t make money off it.

“The world beyond the small tent…drowned cities, burning forests, shifting sand dunes…He’d stopped loving the snow when he’d realized it was an illusion” (103) effects of yesterday not so far from us but we feel distant, safe, cut-off= ILLUSION.

THE RAINY SEASON, Tobias S. Buckell

TL;DR: Acid rain, literally. Run offs and hallucinations and coming back “home”.

Key Quotes and what’s up:“The place wasn’t the same. The place you lived no longer existed.” (112)- see CC and the ending of the pastoral, nostalgic past.

A HUNDRED HUNDRED DAISIES, Nancy Kress

TL;DR: pipelines and water supply shortage, mutiny, and the loss of dreams, of “daisies”, have to make up a new, pretend one—kinda to give hope to the younger sis. PAPER DAISIES= not authentic, but an idea. Power of what’s on paper

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“I’m not a child, and this is my future, too” (129)—affects everyone, all ages, not just the oldies. Gotta take part of changing the system.

“It will be a war, won’t it, Danny? Like in history” (140)—shortages in anything triggers violence, everyone needs water=FIGHT FOR IT

“Even our small town…has a black market” (140)—making money out of the shortage of water, still people profiting from it

THE NETHERLANDS LIVES WITH WATER, Jim Shepard

TL;DR: In Netherlands, we cope with the rising water; life built around water. Public/Private interests—who wins?

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“Henk’s class is viewing a presentation at the Climate Campus—Water: the Precious Resource and Deadly Companion” (153) 1)they actually have a campus dedicated to climate studies? Explain. 2) precious resource and deadly companion—you can say that again, the necessity of water is exactly want makes it dangerous, see previous story.

(***FAVE)THE PRECEDENT, Sean McCullen

TL;DR: law, climatologist setting the precedent in this post-apocalyptic kinda war camp, being visited by figure of death all the time. Realizing it’ll be a lot harder for him because now he’s set up these high expectations of how to live. Lots of Holocaust and Nazi references, and law & econ so BAE AF.

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“Economic growth was considered about as healthy as cancer” (177)—consumerism vs. environmental struggle.

“The world will go on, but your world has been unsustainable for a long time” (178)—see L2DIE and EOSC lectures about how it’s us dying, as humanity that scares us.

“Most were fools, not monsters.” “The fool kills just as dead as the monster” (186)—it doesn’t matter what the intentions are. Dead is dead. SHOOK.

“everyone born before 2000 is an eco-Nazi, guilty of climate crimes” (186)- ECO NAZI! WOWZA

“You look like me,” (@ Death) (196)—see L2DIE, death is a reflection of our own mortality.

“Without you (death), I will not be human” (201)—part of living, of being human is accepting death, see again L2DIE.

HOT SKY, Robert Silverberg

TL;DR: Delivering ice berg, ship encounters another ship, awks dilemma about mutiny and take these men who have gone crazy. Screen, a.k.a. sunscreen and going heat crazy. Question of conscience vs. survival. Helping others vs. helping yourself.

Key Quotes and what’s up:

“Who had asked for any of this…Not us. Our great-great-grandparents had, maybe, but not us. Only they’re not here to know what it’s like, and we are” (219)—lowkey guilt tripping this generation through voices of future possible grandchildren.

“No sense looking back. You look back, all you do is hurt your eyes.” (228)—survival of the fittest, that’s how it’s always gonna go.

THAT CREEPING SENSATION, Alan Dean Foster.

TL;DR: Super size me, NATURE edition.

Key Quotes and what’s up: “Humanity was adapting to changed climate…her only fear was that something else just might be adapting a little faster.” (239)—who will win?

[ethelbertpaul444-blog]

5 WTF Ways Trump Has Been Immortalized As Artwork

It wasn’t his knowledge of programme, his allure, or anything remotely leadership-like that led to the notoriety of Donald Trump. If anything, it was the ease and willingness with which he shifted himself into a walk-to meme, terminated with a fandom hectic originating fanfiction, love speculations( i.e. insane scheme presumptions ), and, of course, tons of bad fan art. Now are some of the weirdest and wildest slice in the current Trumpian artwork action for “youve got to” absorb before they find their way into the National Portrait Gallery. 5 Deep Dream Trump Is Pure Nightmare Fuel While computers are getting better at all that is induces humans so special( like opening openings ), there is one domain where we’ll always using them to outstrip: logical thinking. After all, it’s hard to have a sense of whimsy when a misplaced semicolon can return you into scrap. In information, a very close we’ve come to causing computers a life of unadulterated resource is through “deep learning” — software that resembled how our neutrons shoot and is perhaps the future of artificial intelligence. And like better now humans, we threw computers the knack of originality, merely to squander it on monstrosities like this TAGEND Chris Rodley That’s why you don’t share a teleporter with Muppets. div > This is a penetrating learning interpretation of one of Donald Trump’s lineage photos. And if you’re wondering why Melania looks like Miss Piggy on her action to her third divorce, that’s on purpose. This art is submitted in accordance with artist Chris Rodley plugging photographs of Donald Trump into a deep learn algorithm which was also “looking for images from Sesame Street . ” The outcome is this hellscape of unused faces, googly hearts, and wandering entrusts — plus elements from Sesame Street . Chris Rodley Courtesy of Industrial Light and Horror. It could be a lot worse, though. You could be looking at a video of Trump transformed into an awakened eldritch fright contending against the confines of our universe TAGEND Though on the plus line-up, Trump’s hair has never glanced more in its element. Eric Cheng/ YouTube Oh, like you’ve never had a wookiee sexuality dream. This nightmare fuel was brought into countries around the world by Eric Cheng, who said he formed it by plugging a video of a Trump speech into a penetrating learning algorithm that was simultaneously thinking about Cthulhu. The tier of Cthulhu influence was governed by the volume at which Trump was speaking. We’re lucky that it was one of his quieter rantings. If it had been about minorities or women, that video might have accidentally opened a wormhole into the domain of the Elder Ones. 4 All Hail God-Emperor Trump ! div> To a lot of internet manbabies, Trump is the eventual badass. He’s an ass-kicker and a risk-taker, a street fighter and shot-caller, the person who sets the Big Mac into Mack Daddy. Of course, in order to maintain that panorama of Trump, you have to constantly reject all of actuality . Fortunately, the internet boys help find a direction to readily block out the pesky true by superseding it with hardcore sci-fi devotee story! div > Meet God-Emperor Trump, may his choked arteries reign for infinity. Based on the lore of the favourite tabletop gaming universe Warhammer 40,000 , which is set in a ludicrously dystopian future, the cruddy back of the internet is filled with portraits of Trump as the iconic Ruler of Mankind, immortal lord of the human rights empire wreaking his never-ending fight to the undesirables. Experiences like wit, right? It isn’t. via The Flama via The Flama His armor appears to be made from the Ark of the Covenant, which is suitable, because it starts us want to melt our faces off. div > Sure, it’s pretty weird to pick an terrifying deity of fighting as the avatar for a buster who consumed alleged bone spurs as an excuse to get out of military imperative, but that’s where the total disenchantment comes in. via r/ Warhammer4 0k Robokoboto/ Art Abyss Carrying the skulls of his own allies doesn’t seem ominous at all. div > Read Next Teach Kids The Alphabet With These Medieval Death Prints But the likenes isn’t flattering for either slope. Testifying again that they have the racial revelation of someone who’s been in a lethargy since the ‘6 0s, Trump fanboys seem to not realize that this Emperor of Mankind is nothing more than a freakish monster whose “shattered, crumbling body can no longer reinforce life, ” or that his guideline gave rise to “technological and cultural rights stagnation, and a regression into totalitarianism, belief and religion obfuscation and intolerance.” So God-Emperor Trump is based on some creep who rulers over a dystopia in which mindless, alien-hating radicals sacrifice thousands daily to keep the bloated body of their oppressor ruler get. Maybe they did do their research after all. And to employ the cherry on the foolish neo-Nazi cake, the God-Emperor isn’t, uhm … grey. He was born in center Anatolia( Turkey) in 8,000 BC. Meaning the web fascists have made their white dominance superstar into a space-age Middle Eastern king. Warhammer 40 k Oh yeah, this guy is totes going to preserve the white race, you dolts. 3 The New “Alt-Right” Cartoon Mascot Affection Dressing Up As Trump You already know about Pepe, the cute comic book frog who became a hate representation. But since Pepe has come extremely mainstream, hardcore “alt-right” dudes have created a perfect mascot for the new Trump age: a poorly attracted copyright infringement. via Will Sommer/ Medium “Racist Frog, Reclining Nude” This corpulent little shit-grinner is Groyper. No, that’s not a Trump-inspired new Pokemon( although we understand the confusion ). We’re speak about Groyper the Frog, the MS Paint cartoon mascot for hardcore politicos . He even comes in numerous charming outfits for supporters to represent dress-up with( dog whistle sold separately ). There’s Papa John Groyper TAGEND via Slate “These chests actually contain Thirsty Howie’s.” div > Hulk Hogan Groyper TAGEND via Will Sommer/ Medium Even a special edition “Are you piqued yet? ” Burka Groyper TAGEND via Slate Don’t try to make sense of it. That channel madness lies. div > But amongst the favorite flavors of Groyper stands Trump Groyper, somehow searching less slimy as a lumpy frog TAGEND via Will Sommer/ Medium And the imitation mane on the phony Trump-toad glances little stupid than the real fuzz on the real Trump-golem. So if you’re wondering why all the worst accounts on Twitter swopped up their avatars to this, that’s why. It’s unquestionably not because Matt Furie, the inventor of Pepe, has started litigating the lily-white laces off of any popular enough website for copyright violation. No, it’s because Pepe isn’t refrigerate enough anymore. Not like Groyper, who’s too cool for clas — art school, specifically. Donald Trump/ Twitter 2 The Anti-Obama Oil Painter Now Remembers Trump Is The New Messiah Jon McNaughton is possibly one of history’s greatest masters. Not because he started anything magnificent or profound or thought-provoking, attention, but because his use are some of the goddamn funniest a few examples of theological right-wing bathos. Jon McNaughton First and foremost, why would you plant a tree three hoofs in front a target where people will be sitting? This lovely depict, entitled You Are Not Forgotten , boasts Herr Conditioner and attests that you can’t draw Trump look warm and charisma even if you choose him yourself. But the real glamour of McNaughton’s art lies in the fact that he’s merely a really, genuinely hacky government cartoonist with a better graze stroke tournament. He often boasts about the number of “symbols” he manages to stuff into a single canvas. Now, the topic is unity. That’s why a not-that-keen eye can will recognise that Everyman Trump is tower over a working-class kinfolk( whom he’s fastened) as they embed a flower( which he’s fucking kill) in front of a gather of veterans and soldiers( whom he dishonors ), disabled population( whom he doesn’t care about ), black people( whom he doesn’t like ), various cabinet members( whom he’s shelled ), police officers( whom he’s slandered ), and laborers( whom he doesn’t wage ). div > But McNaughton didn’t determine his refer by trimming half a dozen inches off of Trump’s waist. He became a republican beloved by taking drops on President Obama for a solid eight years. Here’s his interpretation of Obama’s domestic policy TAGEND Jon McNaughton Did you acknowledge the 9/11 symbolism? The situation that happened seven years before Obama was president, when a Republican was in office? His foreign policy TAGEND Jon McNaughton To be fair, Los Alamos does have a really nice golf course. div > His stance on Obamacare TAGEND Jon McNaughton There goes the plan for National Treasure 3. And here again is that classic, boasting Obama trampling over the rights of the very same working man who Trump will later save while all the good Republican chairpeople are screaming at him TAGEND Jon McNaughton “But I wanted to flora a tree there … “ div > Man, Obama really seems like a dick in these likeness. We’re amazed that the nuclear detonation didn’t feign his golf move, or that he escaped unharmed after dipping the Physique in napalm and placing it alight in his hand, although that’s to be expected when you’re Literally Satan. His abilities are truly ceaseless, as is his cruelty … as demonstrated by that time he pressured a soldier to eat a slice of a lesbian uniting cake. Jon McNaughton “It’s not even ice cream cake. Thanks, Obama.” Save us, President Trump! Save us from that tricky black sn- oh, you already have. Jon McNaughton There is an extremely famous pennant advising against this very thing! 1 Barron Trump, Manga Star While Trump himself has a unusually divisive sort of popularity, the same can’t tell me about the Trump brats — Ivanka, Donnie Jr ., and the one who looks like a hardboiled egg with a cheek gather on it. His spawn are nigh-universally humiliated, persistently putting their hoofs in those cavities they can’t ever seem to fully close. But one Trump kid is exempt from this ridicule: Barron, the unassuming, sweet-looking 12 -year-old who actually has to live in the White House with his mom and dad. Doing entertaining of a kid is not the nicest stuff to do, so two feelings masters have gone the other direction, trying to delve into the mind of this quiet son and figuring out the uproar he was required to impression from having the most powerful awful father-god in the whole world — in spectacular manga shape, natch. Yuusuke Hori “At least it’s not a racist amphibian.” div > This very melodramatic segment was announced by master Yuusuke Hori right after Trump’s inauguration. It testifies Barron in sparkly bishonen structure with a designation that reads “My loud, vexing dad is president, so the placid unassuming life I missed is totally over.” It was merely signified as a silly mockup blanket, but because it came insanely popular, we eventually got the for-realsies The Adventures Of Barron And His Loud-Mouthed President Father , i> and it’s everything we’ve ever wanted. Joy Ling Well, except for Trump not to be president, but still. To all the non-otaku out there, TAOBAHLMPF ( created by Brooklyn-based artist Joy Ling) envisions Barron, who really really was intended to “watch Netflix and play Pokemon, ” teaming with Sasha and Malia Obama to solve the puzzle bordering a “mysterious anomaly” that appeared after his father took office — which is not a polite method to refer to Kellyanne Conway. We don’t want to give away too many spoilers, but one of the central conflicts revolves around Barron trying to persuade his father to help situated events right. Oh, that’s liberty, Donald Jerwillickers Trump makes an appearance, or at least the DJT from the universe where he doesn’t is argued that exercising is a liberal scheme to sap his treasured bodily fluids. Joy Ling “Please don’t tell me which flui-“ “Semen.” Adam Wears is on Twitter and Facebook, and has a newsletter about chilling history that you should definitely subscribe to . i> Art is great for telling some of the tension out, in case that’s a occasion you need to do in this day and age, so maybe pick up some Bob Ross oil depicts ? b > i> Support Cracked’s journalism with a tour to our Contribution Page. Please and thank you . b > i> For more, check out 8 Hilariously Offensive Artworks Featuring Famous Presidents and 5 Unsettling Sub-Genres Of Fan Art Lurking On The Internet . b > i> Follow us on Facebook, and we’ll follow you everywhere . b > i> Read more: http :// www.cracked.com/ article_2 5547 _5-wtf-ways-trump-has-been-immortalized-as-artwork. html http://dailybuzznetwork.com/index.php/2018/05/31/5-wtf-ways-trump-has-been-immortalized-as-artwork/