#ed on the phone: Harley

[iguessthisisanewobsession]

All of the semi-decent inmates panic.

They all freak the fuck out and bust out in a mass breakout trying to find the baby.

Like the bats are ready for the worst only to come find the rouges in the most strange of team ups.

Like Bane and Grundy are like busting walls and causing havoc and just when you think it can’t get Any weirder

Bane: Little one! Though your games can be humorous against the others it is counterproductive to hide from your allies!

Jason on the roof listening in: yo Oracle you seeing this shit?

Part of

[riddle-me-ri]

The Riddler’s being possessive??? Someone tries to talk to his S/O alone and the Riddler wants attention so he kind of places himself between their conversation or pulls S/O aside? I’m not sure if this is a good ask, but thank you. I love your work!

a/n: oh no anon don’t worry this is a beautiful ask. Being the absolute attention whore he is and the moment he finds someone that will give him that attention, you can bet he isn’t going to let that slip away AT ALL

The Riddlers Being Possessive

Arkhamverse Riddler:

Edward tries to hide his possessiveness over you. 

After all, he doesn’t care what you do or why you do them-just as long as you’re out of his way–

However, there is no denying the weird knot in his gut at you getting closer to the other Rogues. 

Why do you want to spend time with them? Surely, you could be learning far more useful and intelligent things from HIM.

He starts coming up with menial tasks for you to do, so that you are too occupied to see anyone or have anyone steal your attention. 

You have to always be by his side whenever there’s a gathering of rogues. 

Edward will often be the barrier between you and the others, even childishly blocking you from even waving at Harley. 

Edward thinks he’s hiding it well, he’s being clever about it, but it’s pretty blatant to you and the others.  

Reevesverse/Dano Riddler:

Edward already can’t believe that he has you.

He sure as hell isn’t going to let someone else sweep you away.

He freezes every time he sees you talking to someone else. 

Who are they? Who are they to you? Family? Friend? Ex-love?

A possible new love interest to come and take you away and leave him miserable like the world continues to do to him?

Edward is already plotting to find out who they are, where they live, and how to dispose of them–

He’ll already have several different plans by the time you get back to him.

You’ll have to do a lot of reassuring and grounding him back to Earth, and that you aren’t going anywhere. 

Gotham Riddler:

Ed doesn’t like how much attention you draw to yourself. 

And it’s even more frustrating when you don’t even see what you’re doing. 

Edward constantly feels like he has to cut in on your conversations. 

He has to pull you away and bring your attention back to him

Ed will instantly question the conversation, what your intentions were, etc. 

You are by his side the rest of the time no matter what. 

Even if someone approaches you, he’ll instantly interject, and squeeze his arms around you or hold your hand tighter. 

No matter where you are or what the situation calls for, everyone will know you’re his. 

BTAS Riddler:

Edward knows better than most what it’s like to have something you care about taken from you suddenly. 

When it comes to someone he loves…there’s definitely less control and more opportunities for loss. 

He wants to be confident in the relationship, to not be possessive…

But he’s still worried about losing you somehow…

He sees you smiling and enjoying yourself with another person…

Ed has an internal conflict of just leaving you be. 

Or coming over there and making sure…nothing was happening. 

He’s trying his best…

Zero Year/Capullo Riddler:

Pfftt…please.

He couldn’t care less who you are with, who you’re talking to-

Ed’s seeing and talking to other people too, you can too. 

He doesn’t own you and you don’t own him–

Yet when he wants your attention…and you don’t give it to him?

Ed becomes absolutely insufferable. 

He’ll blow up your phone, he’ll show up at your place unannounced, cancel whatever plans you had with whatever company. 

Yeah, you can do what you want, to a point anyway. 

TWOJAR Riddler:

Edward doesn’t hide the fact that he’s possessive.

He always has to have you by his side. 

Ed’s arms are always around you, hands on you, you are always sitting in his lap.

No one should really dare to approach you, but regardless some people don’t get the memo.

He won’t disrupt or anything but he will definitely keep an eye on your interaction. 

Ed will wait for a moment before swooping in and stealing your attention back to him.

Not before making the other person…extremely uncomfortable anyhow.

He doesn’t care, as long as the message is clear; that you’re his.

Telltale Riddler:

Honestly, he’s the least likely to be possessive…

Much like Arkhamverse, however he’s a bit better at hiding it by distracting himself. 

He does have his moments where he constantly asks you what you’ve been up to..

Edward’s very observant, he notices you not being around much.

Or he’ll overhear you talking to someone on the phone–you sound very amused…

He’s not bothered just interested…

Totally not concerned that you may be leaving him for someone more…emotionally available. 

Young Justice Riddler:

Eddie truly doesn’t mean to come off as possessive. 

His possessiveness, like Dano Riddler, is fueled more or less by his insecurities. 

He doesn’t want to lose you, and he’s aware of that possibility at every waking moment. 

However, he’s also aware that he may be coming off…controlling…suffocating. 

Ed will see you talking to someone and will immediately get self-conscious. 

Especially if he sees you smiling and clearly enjoying the company. 

He goes through a bunch of worse-case scenarios that continue to snowball into you leaving him…

Until you walk up to him with a bright smile and hold his hand, instantly comforting him.

[pastrydragon]

Accent, speech pattern and Voice headcanons for the Gotham Rogues.

Riddler

In casual settings, Eddie has a slight New Jersey accent and cusses with the frequency you would expect from that.

He almost always has perfect grammar and has a very impressive vocabulary.

But there are some situations where "Fuck" just does not have a suitable replacement.

When he's going against Batman, The Riddler adopts a more trans Atlantic accent since it goes with his gameshow aesthetic.

Also since a LOT of his schemes are publicly televised he doesn't want to cuss on camera or forget to project his voice.

So adopting a different accent helps his brain remember how to act on camera so he can always appear classy.

Edward's voice is a bit more high and nasally than average, but not to an annoying degree. It's not particularly unique either. So if he remembers so change his voice slightly then he can make a phone call to anywhere and they won't recognize him.

Emotional variations include his accent getting thicker when he's angry or exhausted.

Scarecrow

John has a very rural Georgian accent.

Scarecrow: The Master Of Fear has a rather dramatic way of speaking due to his love of classic literature and poetry.

His years in academia have also left him with a very intellectual and scientific vocabulary.

John speaks with a kind of intensity and eloquence that you'd expect on a stage rather than at the front of a classroom.

A smooth baritone only enhances the effect.

Had he not been a professor, he would have made a killing as a raidio star or television narrator.

John only breaks out Southernisms when he's embarrassed. "Well I never!" "Why I outta-" he also stammers when embarrassed. otherwise his speech patterns don't have noticeable emotional variation except the ones he puts there.

Mad Hatter

Jervis has a strong Bristol accent. Which is an English accent that strongly pronounces R's and tends to slap an L at the end of words that should end in a vowel.

The classic example is Opera'l instead of Opera.

His voice is naturally high and soft, often making him sound much more indulgent toward others than he's actually feeling.

Although he does quote the Alice books often, he does not quote longer passages exactly unless he's having an episode.

The rest of the time he'll change them to fit what's happening or merely reference them.

If he's feeling particularly lucid and cheery, you may not even hear mention of the books at all.

Stress will cause longer more accurate quotes and chip at his lucidity along the way.

His only other emotional variation comes out when he's feeling flirtatious.

Jervis's voice tends to get more breathy and cooing around people he likes. He also goes harder on his R's giving some words a purr like sound.

Harley Quinn

We all know and love our girl Harley's Brooklyn accent.

Honestly I can't make an improvement on the BTAS version so scroll down.

Poison Ivy

Pam has a Virginian accent. It's the kind of southern bell accent you'd associate with Blanche Devereux.

Pair that with a voice like a lounge singer and everything that comes out of her mouth sounds sexy.

Even when she doesn't want it to.

It's actually pretty annoying for her.

Unlike John she uses plenty of southernisms such as "I Reckon" "Over yonder" and of course the venom filled "Bless your heart."

Catwomen

The Miami accent is strong on this women, and it tells you exactly why she moved to Gotham.

You can't wear all black leather in the kind of weather Florida's got.

Miami heat isn't sweet to everyone.

Being a second generation Cuban immigrant, she speaks Spanish fluently and while she speaks both it and English seamlessly she has run into one glitch.

She will occasionally forget whether a turn of phrase was originally English or Spanish.

She called John a dancing skeleton once and no one has let it die. From Esqueleto rumbero- Literally: Dancing skeleton, Meaning: Very thin.

Her actual voice is a pretty standard alto. Like Ed, as long as she disguises her accent she can basically call wherever without being recognized.

Another rogue that hits their R's harder while flirting. But it's less a seductive purr and more an "Oh, I'm being HUNTED" kind of sound to hear.

Bane

Bane is directly from Venezuela and has the accent to match.

His English is phenomenal for someone who's only been speaking it a few years but it's not always perfect.

Whenever he doesn't know or forgets the word for something he'll describe it using other words until the other person figures it out for him.

For example, this interaction between him and Riddler: "I need the office knives." "... I'm sorry, what?" "The office knives, with the holes in the handle." "Hmmm, is the answer perhaps scissors?" "YES! I need the scissors!"

Edward is the grand champion of figuring out what Bane is saying if Catwomen or Music Meister isn't there to translate the word from Spanish.

Bane has a naturally loud and deep voice which can make him sound aggressive even when he's not trying to be. His size doesn't help.

But really he's a very calm and levelheaded person.

If he's actually angry, you'll know it from how quiet deliberate his speech becomes.

A quiet Bane is a dangerous Bane.

Joker

New York accent.

Drops occasional NY phrases but doesn’t mention anything culturally significant to New York unless someone else brings it up.

He doesn't remember what part of New York he's from but if asked he'll say Coney Island.

His jealousy over Eddie growing up in Wildwood is real.

Harley swears up and down he's from Staten Island and anyone familiar with the different New York accents would agree with her.

Joker has a pretty distinct reedy voice that all gothamites will recognize as soon as they hear it.

It gets even higher on the rare occasion he's scared or nervous.

Music Meister

SoCal (Southern California) accent.

This accent is also called Valley Girl.

He's originally from San Diego and spent his early twenties in LA so the accent is thick and locked in.

He moved to the east coast to attempt a Broadway career before turning to villainy and kind of regrets not moving back west first.

He's the first person to complain about cold weather and bad Mexican food when the chance pops up.

But he's gotten too fond of the other rogues to seriously consider leaving.

Even if the Scarecrow keeps smacking him with a newspaper every time he misuses the word "literally".

He automatically starts singing his words when he becomes frightened or incredibly nervous. Which made sense until he revealed he did that even before he got his powers.

Odd.

Killer Croc

Waylon has a thick cajun accent, that along with a naturally growly bass voice can make it difficult for others to understand him.

He prefers speaking French to English and will go out of his way to talk to people he thinks might speak his preferred language.

Jervis, Edward, Victor Fries and Joker speak with him in French when in a one on one conversation. 

Yes Joker speaks French, no he doesn’t remember why or how. He honestly didn’t even know he could until he met Waylon. 

Waylon is incredibly charming and personable once you figure out what he's saying, he's definitely the most well liked rogue among his peers next to Harley.

Emotional variants include getting even more growly when angry and speaking completely in French when distracted.

Penguin

A lot of people say he has an English accent, he doesn’t, never say this in front of him.

The man is WELSH, and he has ruined people’s lives over having his accent confused on particularly difficult days.

He takes great pride in his heritage and being accused of being “English” of all things is one of the quickest ways to sour his mood.

No offense to Mr. Tetch of course, it's the principle of the thing really.

He rarely speaks Welsh these days unless visiting extended family.

He does use the proverb “Deuparth gwaith yw ei ddechrau”(Two-thirds of work is starting), mostly to himself but he’ll use the proverb with others when appropriate.

Emotional variants include his voice getting squawk like when scared. He also laughs like a mad pelican.

Clayface

I forget who came up with this originally and I'm kicking myself for not remembering but I've adopted the head canon that Clayface was an "aging" K-pop/drama star that was on tour in the states when his manager coerced him into trying an experimental cosmetic treatment that turned him into Clayface.

So Clay has a very strong Korean accent and probably speaks the worst English out of all the rogues.

It's passable but he understandably just wasn't expecting to need it this much.

Despite his difficulties he still somehow gains control over the majority of his conversations and seems to exude likability.

He's trained for years to make his voice as soothing and pleasant as possible and he's not going to let being a mud monster ruin his hard work.

Until something triggers his traumatic memories and sends him into a frothing rage full of bubbling curses or a depressive meltdown where he becomes a pile of blubbering goo.

He's totally incomprehensible when he's having either kind of breakdown even to other Korean speakers, honestly HE doesn't even really know what he's saying.

Many of the rogues have hired him to put his acting skills to use in various schemes and Clayface is amazed at all the new voices he can do.

He's also been Music Meister's backup vocalist for a few of his schemes so you know he's legitimately good.

Bookworm

He has a rather general east coast accent.

Until he gets angry and starts cursing in Portuguese.

You'd never guess because he's an ashy fucker and his skin never sees the sun since he spends all his time reading inside, but the guy is mainly indigenous Brazilian.

You might be able to get a clue from his facial features if he wasn't wearing the world's thickest glasses and a hat.

He has near permanent "Library voice" so people often struggle to hear him above everything else that might be going on.

His voice is surprisingly sonorous and captivating when he can be well heard.

Since Arkham doesn't often get new books, fresh literature was fought over until Joker suggested "AudioBookworm" which is just Bookworm reading the new book aloud for everyone.

Until his little used voice gives out a bit at which point Scarecrow or Mad Hatter will step in until the end of the chapter.

Mr. Freeze

Victor has a moderate Icelandic accent.

Riddler and Joker have a competition going to see how many lines from Skyrim they can trick him into saying.

Victor figured it out immediately but plays dumb to this day in order to fuck with them.

He said "Hey, you. You're finally awake." to Edward after he woke up from a nap in the rec room once and Victor will treasure the face that nerd made forever.

Victor has a bit of a "resting bitch voice" he always sounds annoyed.

Unless he's talking to Nora, then he just sounds like a simp.

Not really a voice head canon but he gets hiccups very easily from laughing.

BONUS Nora

Nora is from Belarus so she often got mistaken for having a Russian accent.

But unlike Oswald she rarely cares enough to correct people much less get angry over it.

Nora speaks with great confidence and authority, even when she doesn't necessarily have either.

Her voice definitely broadcasts "Don't even fucking THINK about arguing with me."

The personality and accent get her the nickname "Ice queen" wherever she works.

Which is very unfair, she's a kind and compassionate women!

She's just also right and she should say it.

Nora's voice becomes utterly saccharine around Victor, they're absolutely obnoxious to listen to together.

[like-rain-or-confetti]

The wrath of Jonathan Crane

WARNING: I cant find the warnings so this has MATURE, DARK CONTENT. There are themes of mental health/illness, mentions of suicide and grief. DO NOT READ if these themes will cause any triggers and/or distress.

Edward walked Jonathan to Jonathan's front door. Jonathan's expression empty as he turned the keys. "Are you going to be okay? I can stay if you need some company." Jonathan shook his head with a smile. "I'll be absolutely fine, Edward. Thank you for the concern." Jonathan replied. Edward nodded. "Well, if you need us at any time, pick up the phone. Any time." "Thanks." Jonathan replied. "Thank everyone for coming, please?" Jonathan asked. "Of course. Although i think we all know and were honoured to be there." Edward responded. Edward squeezed Jonathan's shoulder comfortingly before turning back towards the car in which Harvey waited in the drivers seat. He raised his hand to Jonathan who sent him a nod.

Jonathan turned closing the door behind him. The lights off, the house silent. Without warning, Jonathan threw his keys against the wall. They clattered to the ground but Jonathan simply walked into the kitchen shrugging off his coat and tossing it onto the nearby couch. A major difference to his usual routine of hanging up his jacket.

That night he stared at the empty side of the bed. Your side. It was cold and as Jonathan ran his hand along the sheets, he felt a lump in his throat. His wedding ring, glinted in the moonlight that peeked between the curtains.

A week later he changed the bed sheets. Taking your pillow cases and sealing them into a bag before putting them in a closet. He purposefully avoided looking at your clothes. He knew the time was coming to do something with your things. Pictures of you were scattered around the place. Atleast one in every room. It kept the feeling of you being around alive. Even if you weren't. Eventually, Jonathan stopped avoiding it and called Harley.

"I considered getting help from Edward until I remembered he was Edward and I'm not in the mood to hear how his royal highness has better things to do." Jonathan said flatly and Harley giggled as she stepped by him and into the apartment. Jonathan led Harley to his bedroom. Harley caught sight of the picture of you and Jonathan at his bedside. One of many wedding pictures. She smiled as she moved closer bending down slightly to get a better view. "I've never seen you so happy than I did on your wedding day, Jonny." Harley smiled at the picture. "That's because that was the happiest day of my life, Harley." Jonathan replied turning to the dressers. "If you want anything of theirs or think someone else would. Go ahead and take it. Better start with that." Jonathan told her. "Maybe we should start with what you want to keep, Jonathan." She suggested. "I don't know if I could Harley." Jonathan replied. "I can't decide if it's too painful to part with their stuff or keep it." Jonathan looked to the ground. "Hey," Harley moved to his side. "We're in this together. One piece at a time." She said gently. "Now, let's call Ed. He's the tech guy. He'll get their photos and anything else that are good memories. If he squeals then I'll kick the shit out of him for you." She finished and Jonathan hummed in amusement. "Much obliged." Jonathan looked down at his wedding ring. He wasn't really certain what to do with it. Harley noticed. "You know you don't have to get rid of that." Harley nodded to his wedding ring. "Lots of people keep them." "I know." Jonathan replied. "I told many patients that very same thing. I never understood it. It was just a bit of jewellery yet here I am now...I don't even so much stomach the thought of taking it off." "So keep it on."Harley shrugged. "Your heart still belongs to (Y/N)." "Nothing will ever change that." He shot her a smile. "So that's it then. If you want to wear that ring for the rest of your life then you do it!" She said.

It wasn't often when some of Gotham's criminals were all in the same room. However, the Bat had that ability to bring them together. Although very few could understand why they were meeting Victor Fries. Until Oswald pocketed something Victor held out of him. Ironically, the room was always icy when Victor Fries was around. Many with common sense walked on egg shells around him. Even Jonathan was careful with his responses. Although since you died, Jonathan didn't have the energy or patience to do such a thing. Naturally, all Victor was interested in was Nora. Jonathan spoke up making everyone on edge and stiff. "How long were you and Nora married? Before her condition that is." Jonathan asked. Asking Victor about his wife was dangerous territory. She was off limits and his only ambition was to save her. This often meant bad news for any who so much mentioned her. Fries considered the fellow criminals unworthy of even uttering her name. "Fourteen years." Victor replied, his gaze narrowing on Jonathan. Jonathan nodded the side of his lips curled into a small smile seemingly at the thought. "I didn't get that long." Jonathan remarked. He smiled but it was a bitter one. His tone daring anyone to utter so much of one wrong word. No one said a word. You and Jonathan had been married for nearly three years. The mark a mere three months away.Now, no one was really certain who to be more wary about Victor or Jonathan. "My deepest condolences, Dr Crane." Victor spoke with a monotone voice. Jonathan didn't respond and simply turned away.

Later that night, Jonathan felt the loneliness more than he had before. You absence was in the very air he breathed and couldn't be evaded. The living room was dark, illuminated only by the TV. Jonathan sat on the couch, a glass of red wine in hand. Your wedding video played. It had been you that was eager for a wedding video. Jonathan didn't care for one. He found the pictures enough but figured it wouldn't hurt. It wasn't like money was an issue. It felt so very long ago. Maybe even a dream. A dream that he had to eventually wake up from. He didn't remember dreams being so painful when they're gone. He raised his glass to his lips, mumbling to himself quietly before the glass would touch his lips. "To us, darling."

Harley and Edward practically dragged Jonathan out for drinks with them along with Penguin and Two-Face. They succeeded as it cost more energy to refuse than just drag him along. After all, this was hardly for his comfort. It was for their own comfort for his grief.

Humans are never taught how to live uncomfortably. Discomfort is always something that must be changed as quick as possible or the more that person suffers. It made them feel better that he was there tonight because then they don't have to fear being terrible friends or that Jonathan would be the next to go. He had little doubt such thoughts rushed through their minds.

"He's tinkering away with those little hats and he won't listen to how childish they are!" Edward exclaimed. "You can make plenty of those without all that bravado! That's coming from me! Style is a flare for detail but shouldn't be used to hinder your successes!" "So we'll know who's being controlled by the top hats on their heads?" Harvey spoke. "Exactly!" Edward exclaimed again. "He wouldn't listen to me. He got angry even! He should be thanking me for my wisdom!" Edward jabbed the table. "It's Jervis Tetch! He's hardly the next criminal mastermind." Penguin dismissed with a flick of his wrist. "Not with the hats." Harley giggled. "Oh!" She perked up before turning to Jonathan. "I can collect the rest of (Y/N)'s stuff in a couple of days if you want." "Certainly." Jonathan sighed. "Wait, you cleared their stuff?" Edward raised an eyebrow. "Yes. Enough time has passed." Jonathan nodded. "Shit. Good on you." Harvey began. "I couldn't so much as look at anything of Gilda's if I saw anything left behind. Not for a year." "Yes, well, I felt it was time." Jonathan lied. There was no way to be ready for that. "It was becoming difficult to move on with all of their stuff around." "So you're going to stay in that apartment? Honestly, I thought you'd want to get the hell outta there." Penguin spoke. "It was my apartment before I even met (Y/N).I've been there longer than they were." Jonathan replied. "I think about that a lot." Harley mumbled, her gaze locked on the table. "How they could have such an impact on my memory of your apartment. How it's not right without them in it."

Jonathan's jaw set momentarily before he spoke. "Here's what I think about." Jonathan began, sitting forward in his seat. "I was a fucking psychiatrist for eight years. I dealt with people who were suicidal from all walks of life. So how didn't I see it in (Y/N)? How did I miss it?" Edward and Harley looked at each other, the two thinking the same thought. "Maybe you were too close? There's a reason doctors don't treat their loved ones." Edward tried. Jonathan blinked. "Okay." He turned his head to Harley. "Harley, you were also a psychiatrist but you didn't share a life with them. Tell me, did you see it coming? Was my (Y/N) suicidal?" Jonathan's question was blunt. Most wouldn't be able to think of such a thing or dance around it. Tell themselves something to make it better. However Jonathan had dealt with pain so many times that he had no trouble speaking his mind. "Jonathan-" Edward began. "I was asking Harley." Jonathan cut him off with a cold stare. He looked back at Harley, jaw tight. "Did you?" Harley looked at him uncomfortably for a moment before she responded. "No." She said meekly. "I had no clue." "That makes both of us." He smiled cheerfully, but it didn't meet his empty eyes making him more intimidating. Although it was worse knowing it wasn't genuine and given the topic, it was actually masking his fury. "That's not unheard of Jonathan." Edward spoke. Jonathan shook his head with a sigh, sitting back in his chair. "It fucking eats at me. It's not right. It can't be. I should have been the first person to see the signs so what does this mean? I have no idea. No fucking idea." He smiled as though joking, leaning forward and tapping the table as he spoke. "Makes you wonder though, doesn't it? What else I didn't know?" His smile faltered as his gaze met Edward's, a shaky breath leaving Jonathan. "I want to know." Jonathan told him quietly. Edward, for the first time in a long time, was speechless.

Harley and Edward took Jonathan home. "You didn't have to do this. As I have already told you." Jonathan tossed his keys on the counter. "And as I told you, Johnny, I'm doing it with or without your permission." Harley chirped before flopping onto his couch beside him seconds after he sat down. "Now I gotta congratulate you. You stunned Eddie back there." Harley giggled and Jonathan smirked slightly. "Who knew it was possible." Jonathan replied. "Too right who knew, I kind of wish I took a picture of him!" She giggled. "Shut up the two of you!" Edward huffed closing the door behind him.

Harley giggled, eyes drifting to Jonathan. She did a double take on Jonathan before wrapping her arm around Jonathan's shoulder. "Seriously though, between you and me. You know we have your back right?Don't try to hide from us, Johnny. We know how much they mean to you." "Meant." Jonathan corrected. "No. Mean." Harley retorted. "Just because they died, doesn't mean you get to stop caring the second they're gone. You're hurt because you love them." "Surprisingly not the most idiotic thing you've said, Harley." Edward mused. "Motherfucker, I have a PH-fucking-D!" Harley snapped. "I know. That's why is so surprising that you can be so stupid." Edward responded dryly. "Don't you two start in my home." Jonathan sighed. "He started it!" Harley said loudly. Edward was about to protest when Jonathan covered Harley's mouth and then Edward's. "Both of you. At least wait until I'm asleep before you start acting like children." Harley rolled her eyes with a muffled "fine." Edward following suit. Jonathan dropped his hands. "I just...not even that very day did they?" Edward trailed off with a sigh. Jonathan seemed to understand what Edward was asking. After all, just about every fitting question, he had already thought about a million times by now. He dug into his pocket. "The last text I got from them was that they would be ten minutes late getting home so we might have been late going to the Iceberg Lounge to meet you." Jonathan's eyes were glued to Edward's, eyes wide in an intense stare. "That's it?" Edward asked quietly. Once again, Jonathan smiled in amusement. "Mmhmm." He nodded, swallowing thickly, unable to trust his voice momentarily. "No 'kiss kiss, your loving spouse', nothing. So do I try to sit and pretend that my spouse killed themselves and didn't even give an explanation why or a goodbye? That I understand any of that?" "I..." Edward trailed off. "I don't know." Edward grimaced at his own words, like the gave him a bad taste in his mouth. Jonathan smiled teasingly. "Well I'll be damned. Finally stumped you." Jonathan chuckled to himself. "Maybe there's no right answer for right now." Harley finally said. "It's hard and it's annoying but it is what it is." Jonathan rolled his eyes.

Night after night, he never could wrap his head around why you would do such a thing. You showed no signs, nor did you even get your affairs in order. This was such a fleeting decision. That was plausible but only with the context of feeling suicidal. Why would you talk about a future that you wouldn't be a part of? Knowingly? This was something that could have driven him to madness. He was missing a piece of the puzzle. Something brought you to that point and with that knowledge, all of this would make sense. He was certain of that.

Jonathan decided one morning to visit your grave. He hadn't been there since the funeral, unable to face the slab with your name engraved. Almost as though facing it would be to accept you were gone and he wasn't there yet. Not enough to move on by any means. He grew wary of the day he would be able to move on. He reckoned it'd come quickly given his isolating conditions of his mind. It was hard enough work to care for someone when they're alive. Trying to care for their memory in death was that much harder. Deep down, he was the mourning husband but to really show it... it'd only be a performance. Something he had no patience for. So if he seemed cold, withdrawn or uncaring when it came to his late spouse, well, so be it.

He was surprised to find he wasn't alone in the idea. In fact, someone had beaten him to it. "Jervis?" Jonathan called out as he moved towards the man standing over your grave, his hands in his pockets. "Mr Crane!" Jervis jumped. "I do apologise, I was lost in thought." "No need to fret...I'm just surprised to find you here." Jonathan replied. Jervis gave him a half-sad smile. "Indeed. I wanted to pay a visit to my friend, pay my respects." Jonathan scrutinised how Jervis looked fondly at the grave. As though it was you. It was another thing he observed of human behaviour. To him it was just stone. Yet to Jervis, it was a mark of the person you once were, never to be forgotten. That was peculiar, given you were married to Jonathan, yet Jervis seemed to show more emotion to your loss in a more consistent manner whereas Jonathan could not. "I haven't seen you around much." Jonathan stated flatly. "I've been keeping my distance." Jervis admitted. "I figured we have all the time in the world and given how much attention you've been getting from our friends. I thought you may appreciate the space." Truth be told, Jonathan was indifferent to being left alone by Jervis and bombarded by the others. Each meant nothing to him. However Jonathan was rather confused by Jervis' words. When someone dies, you hardly come to the conclusion that you'd have all the time in the world. Instead, most would be reminded of how brief life is and that you could lose anyone at anytime. Death waited for no one when time runs out. It had to be Jervis' confusion or perhaps his nerves as he made meaningless conversation in the very awkward company of a grieving Jonathan Crane. "How have you been?" Jervis asked lightly. "With all of this, I mean." He added. Jonathan exhaled. "Everyday is a new challenge." Jonathan replied. "I'd say I'm functioning but I'm by no means doing well." Jervis nodded. "That is understandable." He took a breath. "Try not to dwell too much, yes? I understand that will be very improbable but do what's best and let them rest." Jervis replied. "What do you reckon, Jervis? Do you think I brought them to this? Am I missing something?" Jonathan wanted to humour himself with Jervis' response. His mind tended to come up with bizarre things, some of them had a difficult to find insight. Jervis sighed, pondering the question. "I think it was beyond your control. I think when we ignore things, they don't leave us. They creep along behind you and then they bite." Jervis tucked his gloved hands back into his coat pockets. He turned as though to leave before pausing, looking back at Jonathan. "Sometimes when alone we can get such silly little ideas in our head." Jervis said lightly, eyes full of sorrow as he slowly shook his head. "Just like that, they control us." He sighed. "Chin up, Hare." He said softly before rising turning and walking away. Jonathan watched him as he left.

Even by the time Jonathan decided to head home himself, Jervis' words were stuck in his head. He was used to odd when it came to Jervis but something about his words stuck with Jonathan.

Jervis rarely acknowledged suicides. To him, there was no such thing. A silly comfort to settle him. A pretty lie to cover the ugly truth. So it was particularly confusing that he acknowledged what happened to you. Jonathan mulled over the encounter with a glass of red wine. There was something off- something blaring at him until he couldn't pinpoint what it could be. He couldn't disregard it either. As much as he tried to, his mind never strayed. 'I think it was beyond your control.' It was a comforting statement that many would provide but Jervis often spoke as a collective. He often spoke in plurals. 'We' instead of 'I'. 'Us' instead of 'Me'. Mostly because he thinks he's speaking in plural, referring to one of his delusions. Yet he was certain and oddly final. It wasn't in Jonathan's control alone, whereas, Jervis would have said 'it's beyond our control'. A self soothing perspective to assure both Jonathan and Jervis that nothing by anyone could have been done. Then again, Jervis didn't acknowledge suicides. He'd insist someone was slain by something no one could see. The red Queen or the Jabberwocky in their head got to them before anyone else could. Yet he spoke nothing of any fictional beings at the graveyard. It was a little bizarre that someone who couldn't acknowledge the reality of suicide would be able to mention it for someone he thought of a dear friend. Not to mention the partner of one of the very few friends Jervis actually has. Jonathan sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. Perhaps he was just overthrowing things. Denial could be a slippery bastard if strong enough. 'I've been keeping my distance...figured we had all the time in the world.' Jonathan straightened slightly. It was unexpected to have just come to mind for Jervis it was out of character. He had no concept of personal space so why would be suddenly be aware of it? Because he wants to separate himself. Jonathan entertained the thoughts that tried to piece Jervis together- unable to stop. When people die, they don't get the sense of unlimited time. In fact, it made someone all the more aware of how brief their time in this world is. A reason of encouragement to live whilst you can and tell your loved ones they matter. He had more time. The thought hopped into his mind and he didn't quite understand it. Focusing on it he realised. He had met many murderers in his time as a psychiatrist and a criminal. Very few- if any- looked over their shoulder out of fear of their short lifespan. They're often comforted knowing they had a fighting chance against a possible attacker and even less have any empathy for the victim.

Your suicide was a shock to everyone, Jonathan included. Everyone...but Jervis- a man who couldn't stomach suicide. It didn't surprise him because he knew. That seemed crazy but another thought jumped to mind. 'We ignore things and they'll creep behind us until they bite.' A rather sinister statement to make, although did have some truth in it. Although the usual examples that come to mind are things, but what if this was a person? 'Sometimes we get such silly ideas in our heads when we're alone.' The memory hit Jonathan like a train.

All this time, he had failed to notice Jervis' specialty. It was assumed that you were alone since it was just you and Jonathan. Jonathan was out and out of nowhere -whilst making tea- you stopped and that was it. Perhaps you weren't alone at all and an idea- a sickening idea- was planted in your mind. Jonathan risked shattering his wine glass as he slammed it on the coffee table and rose to a stand. For all Jonathan knew- it was a silly theory but it clawed at him and he refused to ignore this.

His suspicion of Jervis Tetch, only grew by the second followed by his anger. The longer it marinated in his brain, the more energy he had. Living didn't take so much effort. There was purpose once more. Jonathan rose to a stand. Rage bubbled deep within him and only grew. It wasn't often he felt such strong emotion but there was nothing else it could be described.

Being with you gave him a better idea of limits, where lines could be crossed morally. What was not enough and what was too far. In such ways, you kept him in line. You weren't here anymore. There was no one to tell him those distinctions. Although this time, Jonathan had no interest in following any morals at all.

Jervis opened his door and look perplexed to see Jonathan. "Dear Mr Crane! What a surprise!" Jervis exclaimed. "Apologies for the lack of notice Jervis. This was rather spur of the moment on my part. I have something I'd like to discuss with you and have found your company more helpful than the others. Might I come in?" Jonathan asked politely, his expression stoic and expectant. "Certainly!" Jervis stepped aside with a smile. "Do come in!" "Thank you." Jonathan replied as he stepped inside.

Jervis' apartment was as messy as his mind. Jonathan wasn't even certain if Jervis was completely aware of his apartment or only noticed segments and the other pieces blurred away into nothingness. Not once did Jervis ever think to piece them together to get the full picture that was his apartment. Porcelain tea cups and saucers- some chipped splayed around the place, some on their sides and upside down. Playing cards were sprawled everywhere. There were a few candles, torn pieces of paper with scribbles and tea stained. Old weathered books.

"So what brings you to me...almost time for tea!" Jervis smiled. "Well, Jervis, because I think I'd like your perspective on things." Jonathan began. "M-Me?" Jervis seemed surprised again. "Does that surprise you? We are friends Jervis, are we not? Jonathan pressed. "Why of course! It's just- I didn't think you'd say such things." Jonathan smiled at Jervis knowingly. "Yes, well, I was never raised to be affectionate. My grandmother would often spit that I wasn't deserving of affection or love. 'You're a leech, Jonathan!' She'd remark. 'A sin that not even our righteous God could forgive. A demon born of wedlock.'" Jonathan smiled. "You know she'd pray at nights, pray for forgiveness. Beg to God that he forgive her for her sins and failing her son. Pray for the strength to repent for her sins by raising me." Jonathan spoke cooly, almost detached or nonchalant over such hideous things. "I couldn't decide whether she needed more than God's strength to raise me as she did a pitiful job that was only abusive or whether not even God's intervention could contain the force that was my grandmother. I made sure she knew sin she had ever done before I killed her. My one regret is that I didn't break her down and then kill her." Jonathan crossed one leg over the other which only emphasised how long his legs were. "I lost religion long before I killed her." He shook his head. "It was quite the relief." He added. "The idea of no heaven or hell. She'd just be gone." Jonathan let out a sigh. "That wasn't the case when (Y/N) died." Jonathan mused, much quieter. "No...no, when (Y/N) died, I found myself feeling sick at the idea that they just stopped. No heaven or hell.Just gone. So much that I think I've been seeing them sometimes. At night when in bed. I know when I see them that it's all in my head but I can't help but indulge. Do you understand? I thought you might understand that better than the others." Jonathan looked to Jervis who nodded quickly and sat in the chair beside him. "Oh I do! It's a comfort only the mind could bring! For its tailored to what the heart wants!" Jervis replied with enthusiasm. "Although it tragic." Jonathan nodded. "I thought you'd understand. You see, I told you this because well...(Y/N) was my proof that I could- in my own way- I could love someone and I did Jervis. My evidence against my granny. Even now, I love them endlessly. I find it strange that I was so disconnected from feeling such a bond to someone and now that they're gone, I'm detached once more." "From what I read, that is quite normal, Mr Crane!" Jervis chirped. "Would you like some tea?" Jonathan shook his head and raised his hand to dismiss the question. "What about you Jervis?" Jonathan asked. "...what about me? I'll make my own tea-" Jonathan cut off Jervis' response.

Jervis had only managed to stand up before he was stopped by Jonathan. "I mean to say, do you think -as my friend- did you think I was happier with (Y/N) than I was before we met?" Jonathan asked as he stood up. "Why yes, I do. That's a rather silly question, Mr Crane. You know if I could bring them back to you I would in a heartbeat!"Jervis proclaimed. "You would?" Jonathan tilted his head. "Of course!" Jervis said again. "Then why would you kill them?" Jonathan asked.

Jervis looked taken aback. "Is...is this a hypothetical question?" Jervis asked with unease. "Of course not. Why would I propose a hypothetical question when you definitively killed my (Y/N). I'm asking you - my friend and their friend- why would you kill them?" Jervis smiled warily. "You dare smile at me? Look at me like you have no idea what I'm talking about? Have you gone senile, Jervis?" An empty smile grew on Jonathan's face. "Mr Crane, I think you've gotten the wrong idea!" Jervis said nervously. "I wouldn't want to hurt (Y/N)!" "Of course not. That's why you got them to do it to themselves." Jonathan fired back. Jervis could only shake his head as Jonathan's gaze hardened on his. "All this time my granny thought I was the leech who sucked the life out of everything. That it was me who did not deserve love and could never get it. It was fucking you!" Jervis suddenly relaxed, blinking a couple of times and straightening his clothes. "Enough games, Jervis." Jonathan said icily. Jervis exhaled. "I did not lie, Mr Crane. I did not want to hurt (Y/N). They were a dear friend. I ensured it would be quick." "I'm not going to ask again." Jonathan replied.

Jervis sighed. "You're all so vain." Jervis began. "We all came from all walks of life yet you're all so very vain, Mr Crane." Jervis met Jonathan's gaze. "Even with all of those fancy certificates, you still underestimate me. As does Mr Nygma. Mock me, play me for a fool. You all look down upon me. Treat me lesser than yourselves. Like that is ought to be and what makes it worse is that you think I cannot see!" Jervis mouth twisted like a bad taste was in his mouth. "Tell me, my dear Mr Crane," Jervis met Jonathan's eyes. "do I seem so harmless now? Shall I take a bow?" Jonathan stayed quiet, a dark expression upon his face. Jervis took that opportunity to continue. "I never told a lie." He shook his head solemnly. "I assure you as I assured them. I did not do this out of hate for them. They were my friend just as you are. I did this for a lesson, Mr Crane. A formidable lesson that I am no lesser than you. Be it my smile or strange demeanor- it won't take away that i shouldn't be underestimated. The way you all speak of me like I'm not there, like I can't hear you. Better yet, the way you think I don't understand you but I do, Mr Crane! I understand more than you ever will." Jervis nodded to himself. "I knew you would be home late. I knew dear (Y/N) was home alone. Silly little Jervis must be lost again, hm!? They let me in and had no idea what I had put on their head until they realised they couldn't move- not unless I commanded them to. I held out my trusted watch so I could remove the hat. I gave my instructions. The next time they heard the whistle of a kettle. They would go to the roof and jump to their death. A tear ran down their face and I apologised and they were to never speak a word about what i said." Jonathan remembered that fourteen hours later, you had done exactly that. You had the kettle going and impulse seemed to just take over. Neither the police or Jonathan could understand why you'd go to make yourself tea and just walk away to the roof. Jervis continued, a hand to his chest. "I took no joy in any of this. They were my friend but it had to be done. I will not be overlooked again." Jonathan almost couldn't believe what he was hearing. Jervis hadn't liked a few comments he and the others had made so he forced you to kill yourself? As an act to prove himself? It tore at his insides to know you had let Jervis in, trusting Jervis and this was how he repayed you. "You see, Mr Crane?" Jervis asked. "I see, Jervis." Jonathan replied smoothly before slowly walking around the dining table. "Lesson learned then? No longer will I have to endure this bullying?" Jervis continued. "I understand, Jervis." Jonathan assured him. "You won't endure such treatment. I'll make sure the others know too." Jervis lit up. "Delightful! I'll make some tea-!"

Jervis was cut off when he was at arms reach of Jonathan, his hands tightly around Jervis' throat. He slammed Jervis onto his back and pressed down with everything he had. Jervis stared wide eyed as he choked, his face changing colour. Jonathan's stare bore into him, a vein popping out in his forehead. His face was calm but the fury in his eyes remained. Cold, deadly and endless. He couldn't even mind the discomfort in his hands as he squeezed. It was by no means easy to strangle a person but Jonathan wanted to drink in and savour the fear in Jervis' eyes before the light in them died. This was personal just as his act was and all he could think about was the fear you must have had in that moment. Let this be a lesson to Jervis and anyone who dared so much as dream of harming his love. The hatred in his darkened eyes, his jaw set. This wasn't even half of what Jervis deserved but he wouldn't live for not one more second- not when you didn't get to.

Edward was never home, so Jonathan knew to find him in his hideout. Edward knew something was wrong but the empty look in Jonathan's eyes, disheveled with droplets of blood along his hands with deep scratches. "What the hell!?" Edward practically stumbled back. Jonathan told him everything. From the visit to the graveyard up to the moment Jervis went limp.

"You...you killed him?" Edward whispered incredulously. Jonathan blinked at him. "Don't get me wrong! He deserved it! I think I'd have done the same myself. I mean to (Y/N)?" Edward shook his head. "I couldn't imagine laying a hand on them. Isn't that all the reason to suggest he...well, was confused?" "We let Jervis away with a lot of things because of his illness." Jonathan said flatly. "Time and time again it was out of grace. Poor Jervis doesn't understand, he's confused. Perhaps you've forgotten Edward- I have no empathy. I didn't touch him because he gave me no reason to, no reason to care what he did. Until he hypnotised my spouse to kill themselves." Jonathan leaned forward, an icy stare boring into Edward's. "So I went to him when alone, like he did to them and then I knocked him to the ground. Then I watched him die as I squeezed the life out of him." Jonathan smiled. "I enjoyed every second of it. In the time he wanted to prove a point, he forgot who he was dealing with. My sympathy for Jervis Tetch was that I didn't torture him until his mind shattered and kill him slowly." Jonathan took a calming breath before sitting back in his chair. "So what now?" Edward asked. "With the body? Everything." "The death certificate can continue to say suicide." Jonathan replied. "I want to leave their body be. I know the truth and that's what matters." "I...was talking about Jervis."Edward said slowly. "Let the bastard rot in there. With any luck, the rats will shit him out before there's anything to find." Jonathan's upper lip curled. "What about you?" Edward asked. "Business as usual." Jonathan replied. "I'm not going into hiding for that. Anyone comes to me about him, I've got nothing to hide."

[photographypunk]

UUUHHHHGGGG okay okay okay Im gonna just rant I am working on a fic where Ed Pam and Harley all get turned into four year olds by Constantine for a few days.

Im focusing on Ed and Jon (and Waylon showed up) and as Im writing a scene where the girls (Pam and Harley are being watched by Selina) and boys chat a bit over the phone but NOW i want to write the Sirens chilling out together.

Plot bunnies could really piss off Id love to write that but man I admit I dont think I could write them in character -_-

[esperata]

WIPs

Rules:  list your wips with a brief description

I was tagged by @tj-dragonblade and I always enjoy airing some ideas that are waiting in the pipeline. It feels especially timely since I’m nearly done drafting one wip, although editing it will still take some time. Regardless, here’s a look at what else I might choose to work on.

First up, those which are at least started:

I’ll make a man out of you [riddlebird] - Arkhamverse and a continuation of my existing series. Building on a proposal made in an earlier fic.

Every Breath You Take [hattercrow] - Arkhamverse and detailing the start of their relationship in that universe.

In the air tonight [riddlebird] - A first foray into the Batwheels variation of the characters.

You Only Live Twice [riddlebird] - A continuation of my Telltale series and continuing to build the relationship.

Bathing the Duke [Resident Evil Village] - Exactly what it says. A second person pov and focusing on the sensual.

Secret Admirer [riddlebird] - A concept I’ve had in mind a while, not one but both secret admirers.

The King Is Dead [riddlebird] - Rather more angst than my usual fare but considers how Ed might react to Oswald’s sudden death.

Western AU [hattercrow] - Jonathan Crane should have a horse is the basic premise and I built a plot around that.

What Is Reality? [riddlebird] - This idea has been on the back burner ages. Looks at the aftermath of the episode of the same name.

Living Doll [riddlebird] - Burton-Schumacher and a hint of Coppélia.

The Hands on Approach [octogoblin] - TSSM. I guess this is porn with plot. A way for two difficult people to admit their feelings anyway.

Suit [octogoblin] - TSSM again and another way for guys who don’t know how to communicate to convey affection.

TSSM dynamic [octogoblin] - How I see them working together. I was wondering why these all ended up sidelined and remembered I never saw season 2.

Are We Friends? [riddlebird] - Gotham and I’m not entirely sure where I saw going with it. General confusion about their relationship status I guess.

Gotham Gazette [riddlebird] - Gotham five times plus one styled like a gossip column. I’d like to finish it but got uncomfortable with this area of fandom.

 Now on to some which are decidedly more nebulous:

Fate or something like it [octogoblin] - specifically following No Way Home and how events may play out in the altered timeline from when Norman got dropped back.

Nola Riddler does riddles [riddlebird] - prompted by a comment by the AU creator that he hadn’t delved into his penchance for riddles yet.

Phone Call/Past Midinght [riddlebird] - Two subsequent stories in my Arkhamverse series.

Wrap you round my finger [riddlebird] - A general idea about how Ed expects to deal with Penguin only to be surprised.

Gotta Shape Up [riddlebird] - Post season 2 Harley Quinn series but ignoring season 3.

Late Night, Fast Food [multiple ships] - a regular person’s pov on the late night antics of some of Gotham’s notable regulars.

Siren’s Call 3 [riddlebird] - how does one get along with a genuine siren on board?

Limo prompt [riddlebird] - a miscommunication situation arising in Gotham.

Hand kink [Resident Evil Village] - The Duke has very dextrous hands.

Olga my Queen [riddlebird, Egghead/Olga] - A crossover of sorts between Gotham and ‘66.

Trans Ed [riddlebird] - I’m curious how Arkhamverse Oz would deal with that but writing it requires a careful balance.

pre-criminal meeting [hattercrow] - self explanatory really but what if they knew each other before Arkham and all.

skyscraper [octogoblin] - porn. That’s it.

Batwoman [riddlebird] - I wanted to explore just what happened to our guys and how Enigma fit into that.

Batman vs Dracula [riddlebird] - It was suggested to me to rewrite this film as having Ed involved and I liked that idea.

kids museum meeting [riddlebird] - some comics have shown the young Penguin and Riddler so obviously I ask myself, well what if they met then?

Santa Clause 4 [riddlebird] - Based more on the Krampus. Will I or will I not write this come December.

Pecking Order 2 [riddlebird] - Picking up where part 1 left off and investigating how things proceed.

The Batman [none] - what if a trans Oswald had to give up a kid when he was younger? And what if that kid later found him.

Gamer Oz [riddlebird] - In order to impress Ed, Oswald pretends (badly) to be a gamer.

P.I. Riddler [riddlebird] - sort of turning the femme fatale trope around so Ed falls for the husband.

60s bookshop [riddlebird] - Penguin runs a bookshop and is pursued by Bookworm and Riddler.

Streamer Ed [riddlebird] - he habitually comments on Oswald’s Iceberg Lounge promotional videos.

Rumour Mill [hattercrow] - Jonathan comes to Jervis’ defence when rumours spread.

Pax Penguina 2 [riddlebird] - A continuation where I intended introducing Martin.

Angel!Ed/Demon!Oz [riddlebird] - Another continuation building on my first story.

Circus Crew [riddlebird] - An idea to do something with Nola Oswald’s circus crew.

Rogues go skiing [multiple ships] - Cute piece probably involving the lego version.

Arkham sitcom [multiple ships] - episodic story featuring their lives and antics in Arkham.

If you made it this far, thank you! My ask box is open if you want further info on any of these.

[zorilleerrant]

WIP Game

Rules: In a new post, list the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them and then post a little snippet of it or tell them something about it!

(I'm doing my notes on my phone because I haven't organized my computer yet. I was trying to work on it but I got distracted by Steamboat Willie okay)

(warning: there's a lot. this goes back years)

DW fic ideas

Travelers Carrie - protocol alpha

Yuletide: Midnight Mass

Yuletide: Travelers

???

Master & Mickey

How to queer an apple

Barbie cinematic parallels

Icarus

Yuletide: Spirit World

Yuletide: Avenue 5

Yuletide: Khaos Komix

Dream blue goo

Yuletide: Only Murders

Yuletide: Monkey Prince

Red Text

Gain Infinite dramatic irony with this one easy trick! Audiences love to hate him

Yuletide: Stargirl

Yuletide: October Daye

Yuletide: Usher

Yuletide: Song of the Lioness

Yuletide: Harlivy

Yuletide: D'vana/T'Lyn

A poem

Exchampion fixer

Omegaverse Tim

Grimm

Goncharov

Jaytim pregnancy

Exploding Baby

Carry on

Billy & Theo

Danny Constantine

Jason Swap

Children under ten must be accompanied by monkeys

New Note

Bundtgate

Dick time travel

Read

Battiest season

Frederick the Frog

Godcoffee

spn charmed

CoBro Ben Glenroy

Dick/Garth identity

Xanthippe

Laura & Gerard

Bingo

That's the way the cookie crumbles

Memory Wipe

Ric & Dami

Gordyverse

Psychotic Dick

A Bet's A Bet

Xanthe/Cass

Billy and Constantine

Black Adam, Jason Robin rewrite version

Clockwork balcony

Three

Monkey 12

Dream about ghosts

Jasonfam beyond

Therapist

Monky busy other history

Monky busy Lori convo

Monky busy Dami convo

Snarry time travel

important dc characters

Val Yor

People keep asking me if I've ever met Black Captain America. I have!

All the Company Equipment

Ric & Dami

Kamala and Minhkoa

Smallville Confidant Lex

Batfam beyond

420

Timber Robin suit

Other Damian

TimBer

There's this legend, among my people.

The Prince and the Guard

Clex

Lex

Evil twin

Baby Jason

N

Pizza guy

Kara/Alex

Wait, this thing is powered by magic?

Starman

Hogwarts trans student union

DC Covenant

Batman Dynasty

Aboveboard

Who the hell is oz

Harley and rats

DeltFall

Peter

Sterek

Necromancer Danny

Failure. Retry?

Survey of Doom

Freely given

Wizardbot

Magicians

Monkeyland

Monkeyland 2

Sandman

Family Dinner

no capes billy

deaged Jason

when she smiles

joker junior

Terry

In the case of Caroline Hill

Magicians

Castle

Fake dating

Quentin harem

You're drunk Patricia go home

Kate and Katie destroy the world

Monkey crossing

Annabeth medusa

Qaf

Dark knights of superbat

Kryptonian sex ed

Jon coming out

Graysons live

Gotham soulmates

Dick time travel

MCU Jason

Della

Fetch a pail

Draco mpreg

Harleycest

Sylvester Lance

Green Dye

Yelena

Pennyworth

Wolfdog

Sexy werewolves

who you really are

Xanthippe

Paige Tico

Lost prince of winter

Dav-el

Love Story

Spike

Master

Sparkles Mcvillain

Even More Bones

some of them have more to them than others! I tried to skip the ones I already posted but I think a couple of these are finished things I just never published anywhere

[behindtheireyes]

"What can I say? Wayne's a pretty cute neighbor to have and no amount of money is worth giving that up." One thing about their relationship was that Harley not only gave as good as she got with Eddie but she had no problem trying to one up him at times as well especially if she could rile him up too. "Think I've got a chance with him? I could be your Aunt by Christmas if he will."

She knew he was slightly annoyed by the fact that she was soaked and right up against him but his annoyance did help override the Eddie panic. "Eddie, sweetie, you're going and you're going to be great. Your apartment is already rented, you start your job in a week, and Halen's already registered for daycare. It really is too late to back out of the move now." Taking a step back Harley took his face in her hands letting her thumbs move lightly along his cheekbones, "You got this and I'm still just a phone call away if you need me, Eds."

@behindtheireyes

"Yeah, a billion dollars and you choose to live in the trailer park for the scenery." Those words that came from his mouth were dripping with sarcasm, an annoyingly large amount of sarcasm. It was followed by an eye roll. Harley was telling him not to overthink things. It was like she didn't know him at all. Eddie had always been a chronic overthinker to the point where he thought so hard about something that thoughts went deeper and deeper and eventually he forgot the first thing he was overthinking. It only got worse once Halen was born.

Harley had a unique way of addressing Eddie and his panics but somehow it always worked. He was already more calm, albeit a little bit annoyed that she was soaking wet and had her arms around him. Small price to pay for coming down to a 10 after being revved up to a 100. He took a deep breath, exhaling through his nose. "I'm not going."

[purehoney]

Happier [edited] (Happy Lowman)

warnings: basically, it's long but it's angst may contain profanity, aggression or references to other types of violence

note: based on the song by ed sheeran

note 2: leave a comment if you would like other stories, maybe i'll write more!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From that distance the lights in the house looked different, Happy for a few moments thought that maybe he was at the wrong address.

But through the open curtain, which would rarely happen to him at home, it was possible to see Y/N.

And it was in those moments, seeing her smile with someone else, totally relaxed, that he remembered.

He was no longer welcome there.

Suddenly, he felt in the pocket of his jeans, the small cell phone vibrate.

- Hello?

- Where are you? We have a meeting now - said Juice, on the other side of the phone - You left more than an hour ago...

- I'm on my way...

The bald man hung up before there were any more questions, which everyone already knew the answer to.

As he put on his helmet and looked for the last time to find the woman with whom he had decided to spend the last three years, Happy sighed.

Inside, Y/N heard from afar, almost like a thought the sound of the engine of the old Harley. She knew which motorcycle, exactly, made that noise. There were many mornings and dawns woken up by the same sound.

But she just ignored it, it was what she had been doing for over a month, and what she promised herself to keep doing.

.

Before...

1:19 in the morning. Or was it 3:45? Y/N couldn't see, her consciousness didn't follow her body.

But it was automatic, following the sounds of the bike down the street, closer and closer, her feet guiding her out of bed as if it had a life of its own.

She yawned and grabbed a black sweatshirt from the chair next to the computer.

The sound at the entrance to the second floor alerted her.

Then she stopped.

Happy never knocked on the door, he had a key, and even without, he would enter through the back door of the house.

Another knock.

Y/N turned from the hallway back to the dark room, her body shivering involuntarily.

Another knock, and another, and another after that.

Her heart raced, for sure, she thought, it wasn't Happy.

The moment of silence lasted a few minutes, long enough for Y/N to lock herself in the bathroom with her cell phone in her hand, her boyfriend's number already calling on the line.

- Pick up, pick up...

The front door slammed so hard against the wall that the whole house shook.

.

The old Teller-Morrow mechanic's shop, which was also home to the Sons of Anarchy motorcycle group, was packed.

There were more motorcycles at that time than cars on an average day.

The loud music announced a party.

Happy parked his motorcycle next to his friends, one next to the other, they had just arrived from a trip of almost a week away.

- Good to see everyone is well - Gemma, the matriarch of the family welcomed everyone.

In the back of the bar there were dormitories for almost everyone who worked there; many stayed there for days or even months.

Once inside the room, Happy threw his backpack on the bed and taking off his clothes, hurriedly stepped into the cold water of the shower. All he wanted was to get rid of all the dirt and go home, where he knew he would be at peace with Y/N.

It had been three years since they had been together, they had met at one of the parties at the place, she accompanying a friend.

Happy couldn't take his eyes off the woman, they talked all night and he became more fascinated by the second.

He had never felt so happy and at peace.

- Happy, they're calling you out front - the voice of one of the club's prospect rang out from inside the room.

- I'll be right out.

A few minutes later, wearing his usual leather vest, Happy joined the party.

- Is your cell phone around here? I can't find mine...- Happy asked Juice.

- I don't know man, here, grab a beer... - the other bald one said, surrounded by women, smiling.

Happy took the bottle and open.

- I need to go home...

- What are you talking about? - Tig, almost drunk, laughed - We just got here, don't ruin the party.

- Don't start, man...

- I'm serious, since we left the city you've been worrying more than necessary... - Tig hugged his friend sideways, pushing him back inside - Come on, enjoy a little, you'll be back home soon.

Following the advice of friends, Happy allowed himself to enjoy the party and ended up forgetting both the cell phone he was looking for and the hours that passed.

.

- Damn it, Happy, where are you? Please pick up - the woman pleaded against the cell phone, warning a full message box - Please...

- Happy, please help me... - she spoke for the last time into her cell phone, before the door opened with force and two men came in.

In all these years of dating, she had learned a few things about her partner. Happy did things that she knew were wrong, carried as bad a reputation as possible, and had some enemies, so to speak.

- Where's that boyfriend of yours?

The men shouted, there were two more at the bedroom door.

They soon caught her, who was struggling to get out of there, took her to her room, throwing her on the bed.

- Who are you? I don't know what you are talking about...

- Where's Happy, girl? - the taller one pulled her hair so that her face was higher

- Where is he?

- I don't know - she cried softly

- I guess he didn't mind leaving you alone...

Out of the corner of his eye, Y/N noticed that the other three men were breaking every single thing they could find around the room.

- What do you want? There's money in the closet, please don't hurt me - she tugged on her sweatshirt to protect her legs, which were covered only by shorts.

The man holding her face laughed, a sound that turned her stomach.

- We don't want any of that shit, we want you to just pass the message on to those idiots...

- What mes...? - Before the sentence could be completed Y/N felt something cold in her head and closed her eyes tightly. A gun.

Suddenly, she felt pressure on her arm.

It can't be, not like that! She cried, it couldn't end like this.

- Get up! - Another man, one with a hood, was now pulling her out of the room.

They followed her down the stairs, room after room destroyed, practically nothing left.

- Sit down. - He forced her into the dining chair and tied a cloth to her mouth and hands.

Y/N waited for that to be the end of her, her body was trembling and she could no longer see the faces of those men properly, either out of fear or the tears that formed non-stop. She had never felt such panic.

Something hit her head from behind, then she couldn't hear anything else and her vision went dark...

.

It was morning when Happy pulled his motorcycle into the garage. The sun was burning his skin and his head felt like it was exploding.

Surely he had overdone it last night.

Reaching in his pocket for his keys, he noticed the door ajar.

His head was empty now, no pain, no alcohol, just full focus.

- Y/N? - He called while pushing the door with the gun in his hands - Baby?

He looked in all directions hoping that it wasn't true, the house all overturned, broken.

He walked tensely into the dining room.

She was there, her head down. His breath caught in his throat. Happy ran to the woman and lifted her hair, the woman's normally flushed face was a little purple.

- Y/N, please wake up, - he released her from all restraints and held her in his lap on the floor.

- Did they do something to you, baby?

- Happy... I tried to call you - she spoke softly

- I'm sorry, I'm sorry - he said desperate - Who did this?

- I tried to call you... - Y/N cried - Where were you?

Without strength she just cried and trembled in shock.

A few days after that night, Y/N left the house and left Happy. She didn't want anything to remind her of the horror she had been through, she just took her car and drove back to her own house.

Happy never stopped her or went after her.

.

Now...

It was Saturday night, Y/N was leaving a bar in downtown Charming accompanied by a friend and two men.

Across the street, far from her view, Happy watched intently. She should never have walked into the bar that night and should never have fallen in love with him.

He destroyed her, in the worst possible way, leaving her alone when she needed him most.

She was smiling more than ever, hugging one of the men.

- Let's go brother, you know she's fine... - Jax said pulling his friend - she looks happier...

Happy shook his head, not saying anything, knowing he was right. But he couldn't help but think that one day, he'd been happier that way with her too.

[howl-fantasies]

GOTHAM MASTERLIST

Last update: 30/10/2022  // Requests open (I can write in English or French)

Welcome dear.

I just finished Gotham (again) and my brain's wheels were turning happily while I imagined another character in the game: the reader.

You're not really on the good side but you're not 100% bad either. Which leads to funny mini scenarios where you're a friend, a psychiatrist, a lover, a frenemy, ecc. Most of them are in texts form, but some are written normally.

I have a huge unhealthy crush on Gotham Fox version of Victor Zsasz. Anthony Carrigan is an amazing actor and I love his performance!

Also, English is not my first language so I deeply apologize for the mistakes. I am no writer, just a poor woman having her fun with some nonsense on this platform.

Masterlist

HEADCANONS

Gotham villain in love

Cooking with Gotham villains

Gotham villains in a haunted house

Gotham villains when you’re at the hospital

Gotham villains + Jim reacting to reader speaking in French 

Victor + Gotham villains + Y/N what do they think about dancing? 

Gotham villains walking on their S/O when they’re on their “off” mode - NEW -

Gotham villains having met the reader when they were sane - NEW -

REQUESTS 

Gotham villains having met the reader when they were sane - NEW -

Skyfall (Y/N was shot and makes a last request to Victor) - NEW -

Gotham villains walking on their S/O when they’re on their “off” mode - NEW -

Oswald and Y/N bonding (platonic) - NEW -

Y/N on her period and having mood swings (Victor Zsasz x reader) - NEW-

Gotham characters realizing they were total douche with Y/N - NEW -

Y/N hacking Gotham characters’ phones - NEW - 

Dôles de Dames part 3 (French) 

Y/N reaction after Oswald almost beheaded Victor 

Very special talent Oswald x reader (romantic) 

What does Y/N think about Victor’s sense of fashion 

Y/N thinking she’s pregnant and imagining how Victor would react

Gotham villains when their S/O wants to surprise them

Bloodbath Zsasz x reader

Riddler & Scarecrow S/O being friend/flirting with Ivy and Harley

Damsel in distress Oswald Cobblepot x reader (platonic)

Gotham villain and Jim finding out the cute side of the reader

Being surprised in the middle of... you know... but Victor doesn’t stop Zsasz x reader

Gotham Villain when you’re kidnapped

Drôles de dames part 2 (French) @immortal-velociraptor​

Drôles de dames part 1 (French) @immortal-velociraptor​ story

Second thoughts Zsasz x reader, linked to @immortal-velociraptor story

Gotham villains seeing their S/O being catcalled

Understanding Zsasz x reader having a panic attack

Turning point Jim, Ed, Oswald, Zsasz x reader

Politeness Alfred x reader x Bruce (platonic)

Nightmares Jonathan x reader (romantic)

Jealous Gotham villains (headcanons)

Victor being caught and send to Arkham Zsasz x reader

Kiss against a wall Jim x reader

VICTOR ZSASZ X READER

GOTHAM ASSASSINS P1

GOTHAM ASSASSINS P2

GOTHAM ASSASSINS P3

GOTHAM ASSASSINS P4

GOTHAM ASSASSINS P5

GOTHAM ASSASSINS P6

Summary: long posts. While Jim Gordon takes his marks in Gotham as a cop, nothing prepared him for his first meeting with Y/N. Famous assassin, sass machine and one hell of a fighter, the GCPD's rookie will quickly learn that catching the woman means getting an angry other assassin directly on his tail. The mini-series will globally follow the main plot.

Never gonna give you up.

Summary: Victor is torturing thugs by order of Oswald when someone is interrupting him.

In the phone book

Summary: Zsasz is at GCPD. Harvey and Jim try to understand why he wanted to shot them, without success. Oswald suddenly came in and think he had discovered Victor's weakness.

The contract

Summary: Victor has a contract on his head placed by Y/N and wants to know why.

Unforgivable

Summary: Victor is texting the reader and is awfully sweet. So much, that it sounds suspicious.

The score

Summary: The reader is at GCPD. Harvey and Jim need her help to talk to Zsasz and even find a plan. But it doesn't sound that good for the reader.

Night Fever

Summary: reader asks if Victor is free tonight for some fun in a... Gotham's way but is still a bit salty about their last conversation on Riddler's phone.

Ba(l)d emergency

Summary: Barbara is texting reader and ask for her help to stop Victor who's ready to blow her shop.

Valeskape

Summary: reader is missing. Harvey and Jim try to convince a very pissed Victor to help them to find her.

Hit me with your best shot

Summary: Victor is asking how the reader is feeling after she was injured. He may be the cause of her suffering.

Is that Pepperoni?

Summary: who said assassins can't take a break once in a while? Victor and the reader are ready for a pizza, milkshakes and old movies.

Pax Penguina

Summary: Victor informs the reader they'll need a licence of misconduct from now on. He didn't really anticipated nor appreciated how reader answered him.

Lethal Goofball

One of Victor's Zsaszettes send a series of video showing Zsasz acting like a goofy boy every time he sees something related to the reader.

Poisoned

Summary: Zsasz is under Ivy's phenomenon and Jim is asking for reader's help.

Be my Valentine

Summary: what does Valentine's day look like when you're dating an assassin?

Nightmares

Summary: reader was gased by Scarecrow and is texting Victor from Lee's clinic. They'll need Victor's basement soon.

The "Fun way"

Summary: Victor needs to use reader's new freezer. But there is one problem.

Unfriend

Summary: Victor needs to leave Gotham to see his Bubbe and gives reader's number to Wendell. Worst idea ever.

Bubbe

Summary: Victor's bubbe wants to know if the reader saw the rabbi and if it went well.

Stalker

Summary: when Penguin asked Zsasz to go spy on Scarecrow, the hitman didn't anticipated what he would find in his flat.

Trick question

Summary: what happens when an infamous assassins duo is in one of the GCPD interrogation room? Nothing good, definitely.

Babysitting

Summary: what happens when Y/N find little Martin in her flat and the boy tells her Victor brought him in? Nothing good. Definitely.

Domesticity

Summary: (long post) full fluff. Zsasz and Y/N are spending a peaceful movie night. A good opportunity to have a glimpse of Victor chaotic psyche and his thoughts about Y/N.

Alone

Summary: Jeremiah blows up all the bridges in the city. In the middle of the absolute chaos, Zsasz and Y/N are trying to find solutions.

Boy time

Summary: Wendell is trying to convince Victor to join him at Iceberg Lounge in order to find some nice women. He seems to have found one, but there is a little problem with her.

Put a ring on it

Summary: when Y/N is seen in town with a ring around her finger, everybody is freaking out. Except for Victor.

Unexpected

Summary: Zsasz went berserk that night against the GCPD. Y/N saw him and isn't very happy with his recklessness.

Wonder Viking

Summary: Ed has Y/N's phone and Victor wants to know what. Problem? The answer seems unbelievable.

Bloody murder

Summary: when Y/N is not answering her phone, Victor knew something happened. He didn't anticipated the whole villains to be responsible for her silence.

Ex

Summary: (long post) what happens when Y/N and her ex meet again? More importantly, what would Victor do when seeing the other man trying to flirt with her?

Dispute

Summary: having a couple dispute when you're an infamous assassins duo can be dangerous. Especially when the arguing is done with flying bullets.

Men on a mission

Summary: (long post) Falcone sends Zsasz and Y/N after the owner of the new bar in town, the Golden Tiger. The occasion for the couple to reaffirm the Italian Godfather's authority in Gotham and maybe have some kind of twisted fun.

Sir Stalker

Summary: Y/N found a strange box in her drawer and open it. She now understands how Pandora felt.

Vacations

Summary: Jim suspects Y/N to be responsible of a murder. Problem she's not in town nor is Victor, and she can prove it.

Idiotic duet 

Summary: (Long post) Ever wondered how Y/N and Zsasz became an idiotic duet?

Shot

Summary: (Long post) Y/N was shot when she was on a job after one of Oswald’s tantrums. Victor is taking care of her. Fluff. Full fluff. And a bit of blood to, it’s Gotham after all...

Conjugal bliss

Summary: (Long post) Oswald decided to find a better match for Victor than Y/N. No reason things go south. Right?

PLATONIC JIM GORDON X READER

FRENEMIES p.1 (request)

Summary: (long post) Jim was infected by Tech virus and tries to fight it without losing his mind. He asked Y/N to help him and an even bigger favor.

FRENEMIES P.2 (request)

Summary: (long post) Second part of the FRENEMIES mini series. Jim is still fighting Tetch virus to try to find an antidote. But as shit hits the fan, he'll need Y/N help again.

The Godfather

Summary: Jim needs some information about Sofia Falcone. And everyone in Gotham know that if you want to know something, Y/N is the better person to ask.

The fellowship of the crime

Summary: Y/N send Jim misterious and philosophical messages. So much, that Jim is freaking out and even accused Victor to have brainwashed her.

The Sims

Summary: Y/N started to play the infamous life simulator game. Problem she's not playing with the traditional one. And Jim would quickly understand it.

Bad influence

Summary: Jim is trying to make Y/N realise that Zsasz isn't good for her sanity. Will she listen? Of course not.

A little affair (request)

Summary: (long post) Jim is chased by Maroni's men after he tried to stop a drug traffic when he crossed the path of Y/N and ask for her help. Problem? It worked maybe a little too well.

Assassination classroom 

Summary: Jim is targeted with Barnes by Gotham assassins. His only solution? asking for the help of the most terrifying one. 

PLATONIC OSWALD X READER

Give it back!

Summary: Ed's block of ice is missing. Oswald is sure Y/N is the culprit.

Ghost aren't real!

Summary: Oswald is terrified after seeing something looking like a ghost. He asks for Y/N help but didn't really like her answers.

PLATONIC OSWALD X READER X ZSASZ

Say that again

Summary: Oswald is being Oswald. Reader and Zsasz weren't exactly listening.

Shouldn't have asked

Oswald invited reader at his club to talk about Ed and seeks relationship advices. He soon regrets it.

Names

Summary: Oswald is trying to convince Y/N and Zsasz to do the "call your s/o by another name". Worst idea ever.

PLATONIC RIDDLER X READER

Dr Jekyll & Mr Hyde

Summary: Ed needs his IQ back but Lee doesn't seem to want to help him. So he tries texting one of is best frenemy.

Oxytocin and endorphin

Summary: Ed needs some comfort after he saw that Lee is still in love with Jim.

PLATONIC RIDDLER X READER X ZSASZ

So you care?

Summary: Riddler wants to know reader's feelings for Zsasz. But his reasons aren't exactly genuine.

Stalking classes

Summary: Ed needs some help to defeat Oswald and ask Victor for his guidance. Maybe he wasn't ready for it though...

RIDDLER X READER X OSWALD (platonic)

Trap in a cage

Summary: remeber when Oswald and Riddler are trapped in their cages? Well, now Y/N is with them and helps Oswald to be a pain in Ed's ass.

COLLABS

VICTOR X Y/N - MAGGIE X JIM

Little Lamb or next fallen angel?

Summary: (long post) Since she came to Gotham, Maggie, a mischievous and cunning young woman, caught the attention of Y/N and Jim Gordon. Which of the dark or the white side will win Maggie's allegence?

Girl time

Summary: (long post) Maggie is having a shitty day and her relationship with Jim is still pretty bad. Fortunately or not, Y/N decided to visit her at her flower shop and tried to boost her mood. But comforting isn't easy, especially when you're a sadistic assassin who tends to like playing with people distress.

A collab with @immortal-velociraptor and her lovely OC Maggie 🤩😍

GOTHAM ON CRACK

Small texts between Y/N and the main cast of the series. Big insanity, little to no sense, a bit of humor.

Relationship goal Zsasz x reader - NEW -

Toss a coin to your killer Jim Gordon x reader - NEW -

The threat Oswald x reader - NEW -

Riddle me this ep.6516 Riddler x reader 

Best frenemy Oswald x reader

Trainning Selina x reader 

Good egg Victor Zsasz x reader 

Future Jim Gordon x reader

Education Bruce x reader 

Tell me something I don’t know Oswald x reader

Domesticity ep 5464321 Victor Zsasz x reader

2 simps and a sadist Jonathan x reader x Riddler

Don’t touch anything Oswald x reader x Zsasz 

Need a hand? Victor Zsasz x reader 

The bomb Harvey x reader x Zsasz

What time is it?! Riddler x reader

Tell me something I don't know Riddler x reader

Biggest fear Scarecrow x reader

Surprise Barbara x reader

Disconnected Barbara x reader

The dog Oswald x reader

Costume Jerome x reader

Game Harvey x reader x Oswald

What do you want Zsasz x reader

The scale Oswald x Zsasz

Bazooka Jim x reader

Grenade Oswald x Ed

The bill Barbara x reader

Priorities Jim x reader

That thing Zsasz x reader

Period Oswald x Zsasz

Scorned women Jim x reader

The ring Wendell x reader x Zsasz

White rabbit Tetch x reader

Halloween Ed x reader

Bon appétit Zsasz x reader

Hypothetically speaking Ed x reader

Matching tie Zsasz x reader x Jim

SUPRISE Scarecrow x reader

Something I don't know Oswald x reader

Something I don't know Jim x reader

A bit Strange Dr Strange x reader

Teletubbies Zsasz x reader x Jim

Something in common Barbara x reader

Fortune teller Bruce x reader

First degree Ed x reader

Warning shots Zsasz x reader

Frog in a blender Ed x reader

Pizza delivery OC x reader

Fanfiction Jim x reader x Zsasz

Shopping spree Zsasz x reader

Memes Ed x reader

Relationship goal Zsasz x reader

Do the math Barbara x reader

Spicy meeting Zsasz x reader

Weird dream Zsasz x reader

Here for Gilzean Jim x reader x Zsasz

No fighting Oswald, Zsasz, Butch, reader

Ultimate boss Oswald x reader x Zsasz

Self derision Zsasz x reader

Statue Owald x reader

Let me spoil you Zsasz x reader

Game of Memes Oswald x reader

The Godfather Sofia x reader x Carmine x Zsasz

I said no dogs Zsasz x reader

QED Riddler x reader

Gotham Memes

 Good old times Jim Gordon x reader

A pirate’s life for me Alfred x reader

Matchmaker Barbara x reader

MMORPGotham Jim Gordon x reader

Objection Jim Gordon x reader

Pax Penguina 

Phobias Zsasz x reader

That’s strange Riddler x reader

What is love Zsasz x reader

Gypsy witchcraft Jim x reader

Shopping trip Zsasz x reader

All play and no work Zsasz x reader

Who’s the doc? Jim Gordon x reader

What do you know about children Oswald x reader

Don’t bang the librarian Riddler x reader

Assassin’s crip Zsasz x reader

[batmanrogues-scenarios]

Masterlist 3

Fluff

Big Vigilante S/O Being Gentle With Them : DS, MM

Metal Head S/O : DS, MM

Witchy S/O Doing Tarot : DS, MM

Crush Giving Them Cute Name in Phone : Riddler, Scarecrow, PI, MrF

Crush Rogue Is Out of the Costume : Scarecrow, MrF, Joker, Catwoman

Sleep Walking S/O : Scarecrow, Riddler, BM, MrF

S/O Being Amazing With Traps : Arkham! KC, Joker, Penguin

S/O Just Shows When Called : Scarecrow, BM, MrF, MH

S/O Proposing : MH, Scarecrow

S/O Insults Back for the Rogue: DS, Joker

Gifts for/from Rogues : All

Music Meister with S/O Making Musical References

Actor S/O Being Slasher in New Movie : DS, TF

Intimidating Gothic S/O : MH, MM

S/O Never Having Happy Christmas Before : DS, MM

S/O Wanting 50 Squish Mellows : DS

Kiss Under Mistletoe: DS, MM

Crush Vigilante Immune to Their Effects : Scarecrow, MM, PI

S/O Having Night Live : DS, MM

S/O Has Creative but Weird Solutions: Scarecrow (GN, Arkham)

Arkhamverse Scarecrow x S/O with Thermorecuration Problem

Mad Hatter x Wonderland Enthusiast

Wonderland Enthusiast Asking Jervis Out

MH and S/O Going To Costume Party, Other Rogue Wears Alice Costume

Reader Dressed as Alice Kidnaps Jervis

S/O Often Praising MH

S/O With Crackhead Energy : GS

S/O Being Cyborg : MH,.MM

MM Finding Out Ghost in His Hideout

S/O Being Captain Marvel: Arkham!DS, TF

S/O Just Baking at 1am : DS, Lego!Joker

S/O Being Fashion Disaster: DS, MM

Getting in a Relationship While in Civilian Break to Find Out New Rogue is S/O : DS, MM

Cryptic S/O : Scarecrow, Riddler, Penguin, Poison Ivy

S/O Being from Zombie Apocalypse : Arkham! TF, Penguin,PS

S/O Frauding IRS : Joker, BM, Penguin, PS

S/O Wearing Mustache Nose Piercing: Unburied!Riddler, Joker, MH,PI

Harley and Bumper Cars

Not Sure/Mix

Uncanny Valley S/O : Joker, Scarecrow, Riddler

Another Dimension MM Dating Their Daughter: Riddler, Scarecrow, TF

Rogues Experiencing Period : Riddler, TF, BM, MH

S/O Who Hibernates : MrF, MH, PI

S/O Resurrecting Because They Kicked Devil in the Balls : Arkham!: Anarky, Joker, HQ, Scarecrow

Crush Henchperson Who Can See Ghosts : MB, HQ, Scarecrow

Meeting Man Eating Siren: Arkham!KC, Scarecrow, MM

S/O Having Firepowers and Loving Fire: MrF, BM, Joker, Arkham!Copperhead

Past Best Friend Ending Up as a Hero : Scarecrow, UN Riddler, Arkham Anarky, Twojar Kiteman

S/O Using Spine of First Victim as Pitching Wedge : Arkham! KC, Scarecrow, BM, PI

Vigilante Flipping Script : DS, MM

Finding Posirive Pregnancy Test: MrF,MH, TF, MM

Comedic

Condiment King in Poly Relationship

Reaction to Scarecrow Saying Toxin Needs LSD : Riddler, HQ, MH, PI

S/O Saying Most Out of Context Insults : Arkhamverse! :Riddler, MH, Zsasz, KC;

S/O Doing These Threats (up, same rogues)

S/O Mistaking Them for IRS : Anarky, Copperhead, Bane (Arkhamverse)

"Can I make make meat taboocan out of them?": Arkham!GS,

Taboocan 2: Copperhead, TF, Joker

Kidnapped Y/N Just Chilling : GS, MH

Platonic/Singular

Friend Realizing They're Gay : Riddler, HQ, Catwoman, MM

Arkham Guard Friend : Scarecrow, MH, TF, Joker

Friend Being Too Much Into Daydreaming : MH, Scarecrow, HQ, MrF

Magical Sib Getting Mortal : Scarecrow, BM, HQ

Friend Not Knowing how to express Emotions: Scarecrow, MH, MrF, MM

Friend Wanting Nuke as a Kid : BM, Riddler, TF, Scarecrow

Sidekick/Kid being Ex-Robin: DS, TF

Robotic Protege Sib : Riddler, MH, Penguin

Friend Who is Neurodiverged : Scarecrow, MrF, Catwoman

Rogue Finding Kid with Batman Backstory: Catwoman, MrF, MH

Young Vigilante with Venom like Powers : BM, Scarecrow, PI, Joker

Best Christian Tree : MM, MH, PI

Seeing Cryptid : BM, Riddler, Scarecrow, TF

Friend Being Animal Magnet: HQ, MH, Catwoman, Scarecrow

Getting Scarecrow for Secret Santa : Riddler, MM, HQ, MH

How they Handle Blizzard : DS, MM

With Willing Person as Subject : MH, Scarecrow

Mr Freeze Meets Orphan Kid with Ice Powers

DS + MM Snowed Together

Drinking Out of Scarecrow Toxinated Cup: HQ, Riddler, Penguin, TF

Reaction to Ed Becoming Detective: Scarecrow, MH,MM

Reacting to Crane Being Caught by Mystery Gang : Riddler, MH, MM

DS Getting Muscular Without Noticing

Penguin Getting Growth Spurt

Friend Who is Ghost Pirate: HQ, MH, BTAS!Clayface

Dork Squad + MM Living Together

Magician Putting on a Mask: BM, HQ, Scarecrow

Art

Soda Queen and Milk Man

NSFW

Make me, Sexy Outfits BM

S/O Talking in Underwear Casually : MH, Scarecrow

Scarecrow in Lingere +18

MM First Time With S/O

[lunchtiger]

I really don't know that much about DC aside from what I've seen in DCAU, a few Batman stories, and what I learn from everyone posting on Tumblr, and that was enough for me to wake up bleary-eyed but with a clarity of thought previously unknown:

Batman's Rogues need the Batfam.

This isn't just about the weird tensions between Batman and his villains, it's about play. The Bats are completely necessary for most of the villains to be able to... be. With the exception of Duke, no one is a meta, and many of the Gotham Rogue's manias and compulsions and needs only work as long as the other party will even entertain playing by their rules.

Are the Kents in town? Everyone packs up their plans and nurses their favourite drink at the Stacked Deck. It's no fun to make schemes and play with someone if they can just X-ray vision the plot device or just bash through your carefully constructed labyrinth.

Are the Speedsters local? There is now a crowd of costumed goobers clamoring over each other at the GCPD trying to get the desk sergeant to put them in lockup. Jim Gordon is absolutely flabbergasted and upset at this development because this isn't the routine.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Minnesota:

*MIDI Gray Ghost theme plays* "Bruce Wayne speaking, may I ask who's calling?" *conversational noise and laughter of the Bat fam in the background*

"Bats, baby, it's the Joker- you gotta come back! We can't take it anymore! these "substitute heroes" are driving us absolutely nuts around here!"

"How did you get this number?"

"Oh who cares about that, you gotta believe me- things are worse than ever here, Bats! Hang on a second- Impulse! Impulse get down from there right now you little gremlin- Ed's so depressed he's gone back to the 2.99 crossword puzzle books, Bruce! Clayface has been just absolutely haunting Open Mic night at the Deck-"

"Hey Mister uh, Joker sir"

"Superboy, what do you want, can't you see I'm on the phone-"

"Me n' Wonder Girl were playing catch with Harley and Wonder Girl threw a long pass and I kinda... crashed into your Batman shrine and I accidentally broke your limited edition Batman statue thing-"

Joker, screaming into the phone, "BAAAAAATS, COME BACK, WE NEED YOUUUUU"

"Well, I'm awfully sorry to hear that, Mr.... Joker was it? But I'm afraid I'm unavailable for the next two weeks, *chuckle* I'm actually not even supposed to be on the phone right now- Alfred, I'm on the phone, Alfred, Alfr-"

*tussling noises*

"Hello, I'm afraid Master Bruce had to step away from the phone, but in the meantime until he returns to Gotham from some much-needed rest, I've taken the liberty of requesting his colleagues assistance in this matter."

"Please let it be Green Arrow-"

"Masters Blue Beetle and Booster Gold are on their way to Gotham presently, and should be able to help you with your situation. If you need any further assistance, kindly direct your correspondence to the Justice League for the time being. The Masters and Mistresses are not to be disturbed while on vacation, sir, and let me assure you, that were they to need to end their holiday prematurely, I would deal with that transgression permanently. Good day, sir."

Later on, at the Stacked Deck:

"So?"

"No dice, friends. The Bats won't be back for two whole weeks."

*collective groans from across the bar from the absolute most bored supercriminals*

"Also, maybe don't fuck with the butler. Just sayin'"

[riddle-me-ri]

Ok, here's another one. Zero Year, Arkham, BTAS Riddler

He is having a conversation with Reader, who he isn't on friendly terms with, and third Rogue. Rogue wanting to point something out says.

"It doesn't work! It's like asking Y/N if she would sleep with you"

"Eh." Y/N said.

"Excuse me?"

"Just because I hate his guts doesn't mean he doesn't have a pretty face."

A/N: hahaha this is brilliant! I hope you don't mind I took some liberties in the wording of the conversations but I hopw the idea still reads rip. This was such a fun exercise to write other Rogues! Thanks for requesting! Also N/N is nickname since Harley loves to give people nicknames ❤🖤 Also this is untitled cause I wasn't sure what to title these scenarios lol

Trigger Warnings: Suggestive themes and strong language

Zero Year/Capullo Riddler:

“You really don’t perceive me as a threat? The man that brought Gotham City to its knees?” Ed argued.

“Well, Gotham doesn’t really have the best legs to stand on…” Joker quips back. 

You roll your eyes, it’s never-ending feud between these two.

You just had to be stuck in an Arkham padded cell. Between the both of them. You weren’t even insane, they were just overpopulated at Blackgate, but if they didn’t get you out you were going to become insane eventually.

“Y/N, tell that absolute clown-”

“Hey don’t forget handsome!” 

Edward growls in frustration. “Tell him how I’m Batman’s superior foe. How I threw Batman into hiding! How I ran this city for months!”

Joker laughs. “You’ve gotta better chance convincing her to fuck you Eddie boy.” 

“Eh..well..”

“Huh?” Both men rushed towards the wall that separated them from you.

“Please tell me you’re joking…” You hear Joker mutter. 

“I mean…Don’t get me wrong he’s a smug pompous asshole…

Unknowingly, Edward and Joker both shrug and nod. The one thing they could agree on. Well that and Batman. 

“...but he is a cute pompous asshole. Not to mention his face is totally sit-able.”

For one rare moment the Joker was actually speechless for a minute. He laments, “please tell me your joking…”

“I’m afraid she’s dead serious, my friend. As she should be. Once I no doubt escape before the clown…I’d like to take you up on that offer…”

Arkhamverse Riddler: 

“Edward, it’s not going to work.”

“Oh please, what do you know, Crane? Only someone of my parallel intellectual prowess can see the immaculate results it will produce."

Crane blinks and rubs his temples. "Edward, how is building a race course full of obstacles going to prove you're more intelligent than Batman?"

"It calls for quick thinking! He can't possibly predict every twist and turn. The moment he thinks he's solved a puzzle, another one comes right up before a moment's notice! Only a cunning genius of my caliber can pull this off." 

"I'm afraid it'll be like you trying to court Y/N to bed. It's just not going to work.."

"Ah..well…" you interject.

The two men look away from Ed's blueprints on the table to steal a glance at you. You were steadily scrolling through your phone, not lifting your head once.

"W-What was that?" Johnathan inquiries not sure if he heard right. 

You look up to the master of fear and shrug your shoulders. "I mean yeah he's a greasy egomaniac, but he is handsome in a dirty rugged kinda way." 

Johnathan blinks as if still trying to compute this new development. He looks over to Edward who has gone uncharacteristically quiet. 

Edward's face was a deep shade of red and his eyes were as wide as saucers. Riddler.exe has stopped working, good luck trying to reboot. 

BTAS Riddler: 

"Harley, hitting the toy with a mallet won't help you solve it…"

"Sure it can! It fixed all my other problems!" Harley wounds back with her signature mallet. Before she can strike the puzzle toy, Edward snatches it out of the mallet's path.

"Harley..that's cheating…"

"C'mon, Eddie! I've already tried everything! It's like Y/N sleeping with you! It's impossible!"

"Well not…impossible…" You mutter.

"Did I hear that right, N/N? You'd sleep with Ed?!"

"I mean yeah he's an obnoxious know-it-all, but he's so adorable!"  

Harley fake hurls at your admission. 

Meanwhile Ed is walking away, lowering his hat to try and hide his reddening face from the both of you.

[caramel-clowns]

I showed my sister (who has never watched gotham) a few gotham characters ABOUT JEROME: ”he looks like a strange mixture of frog and rat” “why does he look like that?” “he looks stupid” ABOUT ED: I showed her a gif of the “me?” scene where he does the gay hand, she went “yknow what I dont even need to see anymore of him he’s very gay” + “he walks with his hips, they did the riddler justice, unlike the new batman movie” “the way he’s dragging that sword is gay” ABOUT JEREMIAH: I showed her a picture, she stared at my phone for a bit, followed by “.....that is....fruity” “that man is NOT straight” “Harley Quinn im sorry but he is NOT after you, look at him”

[psyclownsis]

"You're pretty. That is all." :'>

why, of course she’s pretty! she’s always known that. she’s darn tootin’ gorgeous! a bombshell blonde! a pin-up girl of the most classiest and classic variety! a gum-poppin’, heart-stoppin’, bat-head-choppin’ babe!

that doesn’t mean she doesn’t appreciate hearing others confirm the fact for her, though. quite the opposite! so, she’ll strike a little pose, give a little wink– it doesn’t take a genius to see she’s pretty, after all.

“aw, gee, eddie, i didn’t think you noticed that kinda thing. an’ here i was thinkin’ you only liked me ‘cause i’m funny!” cue the kiss– a big, fat smack right on his cheek, with an absolutely perfect lipstick print left behind. oh, sure, he may try to struggle, but poor edward should know by now that harley gets what harley wants. and right now, what harley wants is to thoroughly embarrass him for that compliment. (she never really got a chance with her own brother– consider this making up for lost time!)

“thanks, pally!”

[miraculous-trinity-leo]

Whacky Gotham, Goofy New York, and Chaotic Paris.

(Part 1) (Part 2) (Part 3) (Part 4) (Part 5) (Part 6) (Part 7)

Chapter 5: Then Let The Games Begin

•—–—–·†·–—–—•

Soooo, the Batfam is panicking, Gotham's confused as to why Iron Man is flying over Gotham like a madman, and Maria is with two of Gotham's Sirens (but only Ivy and Harley know this) having a wonderful time playing with Bud and Lou.

Let's start with the Sirens.

Harley is watching over Maria and Tikki as they sleep with Bud and Lou, Ivy walkes over to sit next to Harley, handing her a cup of tea.

"So, what's the diagnosis?" - Ivy

"She has some sort of trauma, has class issues... and handles more than she should, but still does everythin', on top of bein' a hero. She's been through some sh-t Pam." Yeah Harley may have found out Maria's a hero (if the tiny god and magic were anything to go by).

"Is she alone?" - Ivy

"No, thankfully, she has supportive parents, and friends that aren't little sh-ts. I think they're also heroes, she also has a lot, and I a mean A LOT of pent up emotions, she doesn't show anythin' negative, only positive things. She seems to shrink in on herself if she thinks she does somethin' wrong. Pam, we both know there's a limit to how much crap a person can take before they snap, and she's such a sweet kid. There has to be somethin' we can do to help her Ives." Ok she found out alot, but in Marias' defense, they have trustworthy souls, and they were the only other people (besides her friends) that she talked to about it, yes she had her Maman and Uncle to talk about hero stuff, but for the stuff her class does, she only ever vented (without being negative) to her friends.

"Her class is visiting the Botanical Gardens in three days, and it's a 2 part tour, so we can see just what's going on. If it's bad then we scare them a bit, if it's bad bad... they can handle a few slightly poisonous plants right?" - Ivy

"God I love the way ya think Ives, do ya think she can stay with us? I mean look at how cute she is with Bud and Lou... Oh my god, she's cuddlin' dem, and ya gave her a flower crown, how'd I miss that?! Where's the camera?"

Harley took a picture to remind her of this wonderful moment. As Ivy and Harley looked at the picture, they both promised to keep Maria safe, and maybe become sorta kinda-ish parents to her while she's in Gotham.

•—–·Now back to the Bat-Chaos Bat-Cave·–—•

Tim took over the chair and was now searching the possible locations with Jarvis, Damian was sitting on a different chair, trying to act cool, but he wouldn't stop looking over at Tim, to see his progress. Bruce was talking over the comms with Tony. Dick and Jason, weren't helping (they kept feeding each other worse and worse ideas of what could have happened to Maria). Then they heard Jarvis speak.

"I have found the most likely area Ms. Dupain-Cheng would be in. Her phone died about 56 blocks away from her hotel, if we don't count kidnapping, or murder, she would have thought about asking for directions, but may have decided not to considering the city she is in. So that leaves us with a possible 15-25 mile radius from her last known location. I think it best to divide into groups of two, have Oracle stay and update you if anything on security, and or traffic cameras happens. Bruce will be with Tony, Dick will go with Tim, and Jason will go with Damain to search within the area. Stephanie and Cassandra will search around a 5 mile radius near Wayne hotel." as Jarvis continued to explain the other details, the Batfam began to suit up, Batman met up with Iron Man, and they took the North area, Nightwing and Red Robin took the East area, while Red Hood and Robin searched the South. Steph and Cass were on foot in civilian clothes, searching the West area they were assigned.

They searched for the whole day, and came up with nothing. Until Oracle saw a video from a traffic cam around 9pm, 15 blocks away from where her phone died. She called it in and everyone went back to the cave. Once everyone was at the Bat-Computer, Oracle pressed play, the cameras didn't have sound, and it wasn't close enough to see if she was ok.

They watched as she went to an overgrown parking lot and sat down. She was looking down at the ground, and that's when they spotted two figures round the corner and spot her. They watched as the two figures approach Maria, and saw the startled reaction she had. They realized it was Harley Quinn and Poison Ivy that were talking to her, then they saw Maria collapse. They watched as Harley made sure she was ok, looking over to Ivy before looking back to Maria and picking her up. The last thing they saw, was Maria being carried away by two of Gothams' most dangerous rouges, but now they knew where to look next.

•—–· Back to Ivy and Harley ·–—•

Harley continued to take adorable pictures of the children.

"God, they're so f-ckin' cute!" - Harley for the 20th time

As Ivy continued to watch while caring for her plants, Catwoman walked in.

"Hey girls, got the stuff for movie night, so what are we- Holy mother of cats! He adopted another f-cking child didn't he! Where the hell does he keep finding them?! 7 was ment to be the god DAMN LIMIT!!!" - Catwoman

Maria jumped at the sudden shouting and may have accidentally summoned a yo-yo (one made useing creation magic and protection magic) before saying.

"Tikki where's the akuma?! How long was I out?! Forget it Tikki spot-" she then realized she wasn't in Paris, and seeing a new face, she also realized she just spilled her secret to another person within the same day... kinda

"Fffffffffffudge sunday that fell on the pavement!" - Maria shouted in baker profanities

"That's not how ya curse sweetheart. It should go more like-" Harley was cut off by a vine Ivy had summoned.

"Harley, cursing makes the plants sad, you know this." - Ivy said removing the vine

Harley just walked over to Maria and whipsered it in her ear.

"You're supposed to say it more like this, ' ..... .... ... .. ....... .. ... .....' ok?" - Harley ended with a big smile

"... I will never see this world in the same frickin' light ever again." - Maria

"ehh close enough." - Harley

"Can someone please tell me, WTH is going on here, on our special girls day off?!" - Catwoman

"She is a new member of the Sirens as of today, and as a member, she's unda our protection, so effective immediately." - Harley

"Cool." - Maria

"Harley." - Ivy

"Wut... first things first, if she is going to join, she needs to be very flexible, know how to fight, and be incredibly intelligent." - Catwoman

"She beat Ed's @ss with a gun pointed at her, and solved every riddle with ease, so I'm positive she'll be an amazin' addition to the team." - Harley

'God she sounds like a new mother now' "But we don't know how good her flexibility is." - Catwoman

"I know, hey Maria, ya wanna do some tricks with me, of course we need to stretch first, but do ya wanna give it a go?" - Harley

"Sure." - Maria

Ivy and Catwoman sat down on a couch a few feet away from where Maria and Harley stood in the empty part of the building. They started out with stretches, and to Catwoman's surprise (and Harley's delight) Maria copied Harleys streches perfectly.

"Ok, now that that's done, we'll start with some cartwheels, then move on to flips, then handsprings and so on." - Harley

Maria gave Harley a nod... and they were off... literally, Harley did a cartwheel into a handspring, and a few backflips, Maria executed it flawlessly. Harley did some more complicated gymnastics tricks, and Maria did it, Harley did triple backflips going into a cartwheel, into a summersault, and Maria did that perfectly as well. This went on until both Harley and Maria were slightly out of breath, both having massive smiles on their faces.

"Ives, please let her join, she's like a mini me." - Harley then hugged Maria and they somehow both tripled in cuteness as they both did puppy (or Puss In Boots style) eyes at Catwoman and Ivy.

"Sure Harley." - Ivy said walking over to give Harley a small kiss on the cheek.

"Okay... but she doesn't have a costume yet, and she still has to think of a name for herself." - Catwoman

"Is a mouse good, like a mouse themed costume, that or a Turtle themed one. What do you think Harley?" - Maria

"Mmmm, I like that with the mouse you can always toy with Cat, ya know, cat an' mouse stuff, turtle seems... weird even fawh Gotham, so personally I would pick mouse, just because of the cheesy jokes you could do." - Harley

"Very funny, ok then, give me a moment."  Maria then reached out her hand, her eyes then started to glow an icy blue, and a small portal opened in front of her, she reached in and pulled out a small pendant necklace. After she put it on a small mouce appeared and greated itself, Marias' eyes going back to normal after closing the portal.

"Hello I'm Mullo, nice to meet you all."

"Omg omg omg, It's soooo f-ckin' CUTE!" - Harley

"Best to assume all of them are extremely cute Harls." - Ivy

"What the Hell did I miss in the week I was gone?!" - Catwoman

"Ehh, not much, oh but Iron Man did fly aroun' Gotham a few times earlier this mornin' like a madman." - Harley

"Oh sh-t." - Maria

"Maria are ya ok? That was ya first official proper curse in my presence." Harley said looking over to the girl.

"He's gonna kill me." - Maria

"Wait, what do you mean Marigold?" - Ivy

"... He's my Uncle, and I never got to text him I was ok, since my phone died before I met you." - Maria

"Hey, I'm sure he'll understand, now what are we watchin'?" - Harley

"I think we have more important matters other than movies at the moment!" - Catwoman

"Ok, Me Myself and Irene it is." - Harley

"No! You basically kidnapped Iron Mans' NIECE!!!" - Catwoman

"Technically, she fainted and us bein' the good Gothamites we are, decided to take her with us, to make sure she was a-okay." - Harley

"I'm ganna need more than just a six pack of soda to get me through this... Just put the movie on already." - Catwoman

Catwoman sat at the far left end of the couch, next to her sat Ivy, then Maria, and then Harley, Bud and Lou by their feet. All of them sharing one big blanket (Becuase if Iron Man did show up, or any of the birds, then Maria was in a protective burrito and they may not see her right away) and they started the movie.

•—–·–—•

"Oh god, the poor cow." - Maria

.........

"Hahahaha, he stuck a whole f-ckin' chicken head in that guys @ss" - Harley

"The poor chicken." - Maria

"Maria you don't want to see this part." - Ivy then lightly covered her eyes for the ehem, chicken extraction.

.........

"Anyone up for another movie?" - Harley

"That depends." - Ivy

"Any suggestions Cat?" - Harley looked across to the other end of the couch to see Catwoman already sleeping.

"She took her cat-nap already? Seriously?" - Harley

"... What about Pirates of The Caribbean?" - Maria

"I'm good with that." - Ivy

And they started the next movie, Maria was happy, it felt like when her maman and papa would sleep with her when she made a pillow fort. It was a loving atmosphere, it felt safe, and nothing could ruin it. Marias' eyes became heavy, and she leaned her head on Harleys' shoulder, falling asleep after a few minutes.

Ivy paused the move looking over to see both Harley and Maria sleeping, soon Ivy also fell asleep in the comfortable silence.

…………………………

Around an hour later Maria woke up in a panic, she had a nightmare, and kept looking around frantically for someone with tears running down her face.

"What's the matter hun?" - Harley said looking around to see if someone had gotten in. When she looked back at Maria she saw that she was crying.

"What happened?" Harley asked in a kind voice that was filled with motherly love.

"I, just *hic* had a bad dream that's *hic* all, I'm fine." - Maira said trying to wipe the tears away.

"You're ok, I promise nothin's goin' to happen to ya as long as Ivy and I are here, ok hun?" - Harley hugged Maria, and she could feel the girl let out a few more sobs, and quick breathes.

"Thanks Maman." Maria didn't even realize what she had said, it just felt natural for her to say it.

"You're welcome hun." 'Omg I'm gonna cry, she called me maman!' Harley rubbed small circles over Marias' back, and began humming until she fell asleep, she continued to hug Maria until she also fell asleep.

•—–· Back to the Chaos Bat-Cave ·–—•

"What do you mean she's with two of Gotham City's Sirens?!" - Tony

"Tony, calm down, I'll call Selina, she can talk to them and get this all sorted out." - Bruce

"Your fiancee is a Gotham Siren too?! Why didn't you tell me?!" - Tony

"Why isn't she picking up? And unlike some people, this family doesn't like outing our secret identities... on live TV." - Bruce

"Oh well excuse me for not keeping my secret identity a SECRET!" - Tony

"I'll try calling her one more time." - Bruce

"Bruce, it's 3am. Who in their right mind ever stays up this late.... aside from this family." - Tim with a giant coffee mug in hand.

"... I'll just call her one more time." Bruce then connected it to the Bat-Computer so everyone could hear.

•—–· Back to the Sirens ·–—•

Catwoman's phone is ringing like crazy, waking everyone up, including a tired, annoyed, and confused Selina.

"Wth does he want at 3 in the morning?!" - Selina

"Just answer it so we can keep sleepin'." - Harley still hugging Maria

"I'm putting it on speaker, so you lot can testify against his @ss in court, for disturbing the peace."

•—–· Over to Batsy ·–—•

"Selina I need to ask-"

"WHAT THE F-CKING HELL DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND ABOUT A GOOD NIGHTS REST!" - Selina

"Oooooh, she sounds pissed Bruce." - Jason

"I'm sorry to call you at this hour, but we need to find a girl that looks just like every single one of my other kids." - Bruce

"Bruce... I thought we agreed that 7 kids was. the. f-cking. limit." - Selina

•—–· Back to the Sirens ·–—•

Selina looked over to Maria before muting the speaker.

"Do you want them to know you're here Kitten?" - Selina

"... I'm tired, I haven't had coffee, I have no filter, so f-ck it, act like you never saw me today, and let them drown in chaos. " - Maria

"I think I like filter less Maria." - Harley

"Okay." Selina shrugged her shoulders and then un-muted her phone, putting it back on speaker mode.

"Where was she last seen?" - Selina

"She was last seen with Harley and Poison Ivy, I want you to see if she's still with them." - Bruce

Selina looked over to Maria and Harley, both of them shook their heads with mischievous grins.

"I've been with them all day, and I haven't once seen a girl that looks like your kids. Now can I go back to sleep, and forget this ever happened?" - Selina

"WHERE IS MY NIECE!!!" - Tony

"Oh, hey Tony, didn't know you were there, don't know who, or where your niece is, but good luck trying to find her. Oh and Bruce, I'm shutting my phone off so you don't keep calling till the butt crack of dawn. And congrats it's now 4am. you owe me a lunch date, uh-ba-bye." Selina then hung up her phone and turned it off.

"That went pretty well if you ask me, now I'm going back to sleep." - Selina

•—–· Back to Batsy ·–—•

The room was silent for a few minutes before Jason spoke up.

"Does that mean that Pixiepop ran away and is even more lost now?!" - Jason

"Oh god, what do we do, what if she got hurt?!" - Dick

"What if she got kidnapped?!" - Jason

"What if she's with a big time Gotham Villain?!" - Dick

"... What if she got more coffee?" - Tim

"Oh Hell No" - Jason/Dick

"... Lets all go to sleep, and when we wake up, we'll head over to their base and double check. She could've just said that because I called her at 3am." - Bruce

"But my niece is still out there!" - Tony

"You're going to sleep Tony." - Pepper then dragged Tony to his room.

•—–· Back to Maria ·–—•

Selina went to a different part of the building, where Maria assumed the bedrooms were. Ivy had gone to the greenhouse to be with the plants, and now it was just her and Harley left on the couch, and she couldn't sleep.

"... Harley?" - Maria

"Yeah hun?" - Harley

"I can't sleep." - Maria

"Well, watcha wanna do till ya get tired?" Harley asked sitting up a little straighter to get a better look at Maria.

Maria gave a sly smile, and looked Harley in the eyes "Want to go free-running on the rooftops?"

"... Alright, but lets get some coffee, and a snack in us first." - Harley gave her a side hug, before getting up to go make the coffee, and grab some snacks.

After they had their coffee, they climbed to the roof of the base. Harley was in her outfit, bat in hand and ready to do some bonding.

"So, how does ya outfit work?" - Harley

"Like so, ready Mullo?" - Maria

"Yes Maria" - Mullo

"Ok, Mullo, Get Squeaky!" A bright light flashes, and when Harley could see again, Maria was in a dark gray suit, wearing black knee high boots, with a strip of pink at the knee, and black elbow length gloves with the same pink strip at her elbow. Her mask was a slightly lighter gray on the top part, and pink on the bottom. Her hair was pulled into two buns with pink ribbons that faded to gray, and to black at the very tip. Her jump rope around her waist forming a tail going just below the back of her knees.

"Just when I think ya can't get any more adorable. So what should I call ya?" - Harley

"You can call me Multimouse." - Maria

Soon they were racing and doing tricks off different roofs, they were really enjoying themselves. From one of the roofs they heard a commotion in one of the alleys, when they looked down they saw a man holding a woman at gunpoint.

"Not good, seems like he's got issues, probably lost his lover, most likely has additions to drugs and alcohol, and seems to be a little tipsy." - Harley

"I've got a plan." - Multimouse

…………

Multimouse droped a little way behind the guy, grabbing his attention while Harley got the lady to safety.

"You know there's a help center two blocks from here that would be more than willing to help you." - Multimouse

The crook just raised his gun to her trying to keep it steady as he spoke.

"Give me all your money little girl, or else I'll hurt you."

"1. That's not how you hold a gun. 2. That is no way to treat any girl. and 3. Instead of money, I'll give you my jump rope." - Multimouse

"Why the hell would I want your jump rope, that thing looks worthless." the crook lowered his guard enough as Multimouse pretended to hand over her jump rope, only to use it in a quick motion to dismarm the man, as Harley promptly knocked him out with one swing.

"Lets neva have ya at gunpoint again, okay hun? I'm afraid my heart can't take it." - Harley said while tying the crook to a lamppost.

"Sorry, but it was the best idea I could come up with at the moment, besides, any guy with a gun would feel like they have the upper hand if they're facing a random little girl with a jump rope, rather than Gothams' Harley Quinn with a bat." - Multimouse

"Sadly I'm just too popular with the kiddos on the street." - Harley

…………

They continued to stop a few more muggers on the way back to the base, and when they got back they peaked around the corner to see the whole Batfam plus Iron Man talking with Ivy and Selina.

"How much you want to bet we can get back out before they see us?" - Whispering Multimouse

"... Lets try hidin' in the kitchen." - Whispering Harley

As they tried to sneak by (still in their costumes) Selina just walks over and draggs them to the group.

"Here, now let me sleep!" - Selina

"Dang it Selina we wanted tah see just how long we could hide out in the kitchen!" - Harley

Selina did a double take now realizing they both went out.

"... You didn't." - Selina

"We wanted tah go free-runnin'! So what?" - Harley

"She could've gotten hurt Harls." - Ivy

"My suits magic, I am invulnerable to bullets, normal magic, swords, knifes, anything staby staby, and I can withstand any temperature in it." Multimouse said with a slight pout.

"Hold up, is she a magical girl?" - Red Hood in the background

When Selina let go both Harley and Multimouse went behind Ivy for protection.

"We can still make a run for it." - Harley whispered to Multimouse

"... Ok, I'll meet you on the roof." - Whispering Multimouse

Harley gave a nod as she slowly inched her wasy closer to the door that lead to the roof, as she saw Iron Man approach Multimouse.

"Please get out of your suit, we need to talk about why you're here-" - Iron Man

"Multitute!" - Multimouse

Harley then saw Multimouse shrink into dozens of tiny little versions of herself as her clones spread out in all directions, one of which was heading right for her.

"Wth, you never told us she could use magic!" - Red Robin

Harley picked her up, and slipped through the door without anyone noticing.

"That was great, but how do ya get back tuh normal size?" - Harley

"Simple, I just merge back with my clones." As she said this, all her clones came back, and she merged with herself, becoming normal sized again.

"Where to?" - Multimouse

………… So now The Batfam is trying to find many long gone Mini-Multimouses, and Harley seems to have disappeared with her. Harley and Multimouse are now running over the roofs, heading for Wayne Manor.

"So why are we going to Wayne Manor?" - Multimouse

"Because, Batsy will neva think of lookin' for us at his own home, at least not fawh a little while." - Harley

When they arrived at the Manor, Multimouse de-transformed as Harley knocked on the door.

"Ms. Quinn, Ms. Maria, pleasure to see you here, please come in." - Alfred

"Are any of the bat-birds here?" - Harley

"Ms. Barbara, Ms. Stephanie, and Ms. Cassandra are the only ones here at the moment." - Alfred

"Do ya think you can keep us bein' here a secret from Batsy?" - Harley

"Harley? What are you doing here with Maria?" - Barbara

"It seems that Ms. Harley and Ms. Maria are now playing hide and seek with the rest of the family." - Alfred

"Did someone say hide and seek?" - Steph

"Yes, so could we maybe try and keep this a secret from everyone else, please?" - Maria

"Sure, it was starting to get boring around here. We can all hide in the living room no one ever use. Barbara you show them the way, I'll get the food/drinks and boardgames." - Steph

"Is this alright with you Alfred?" Maria

"It's all right Ms. Maria, you can hide out in the old living room." - Alfred

"Thanks Alfie, ya the best." - Harley

"Thank you Alfred." - Maria

"Ok then, follow me." - Barbara

…………

In the old living room, Harley, Maria, Barbara, Steph, and Cass began to formulate a plan.

"Ok, so the best way for them to never find you is to have your phone off, stay away from any and all cameras, and show your face to no one." - Steph

"So, do you have anything in mind that you might want to do?" - Barbara

"Can we put them on a wild goose chase?" - Maria

Cass nodded to Marias' suggestion approvingly.

"I can hack a few traffic cams to help with that." - Barbara

"We can also throw in some useless hints, to throw dem even further off our scent." - Harley

"Good idea Harley." - Barbara

"Thanks, but how long do ya think we should make it last?" - Harley

"As long as Maria wants it to." - Barbara

"Then let the games begin." - Maria.

•—–—–·†·–—–—•

Chapter 5 complete. Hope everyone is stayin' safe, Rockin' those Positive Vibes, and havin' an absolutely wonderful day. BUG-OUT 🐞💮🐞

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