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andinthedarknessbindthem · 2 years ago

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Fili X Reader - Restless

✿ Words: 2,688

✿ Themes: Kinda(?) Angst, Fluff

✿ Prompt: After the Battle of the Five Armies, you are tasked with keeping the line of Durin alive.

✿ Posted: 2/19/23

You had merged into Thorin’s company when they stumbled upon Beorn the skin-changer. You just happened to find Beorn a few weeks earlier as a traveling healer. After you helped with the injuries they had, it was decided by Gandalf that you would continue with them. You spent a good three months with Thorin and the company and had come to appreciate them all, and them you.

You loved watching Ori knit next to the fire. He was even sweet enough to teach you how to mend your own clothes and made you a pair of knit gloves that you carry with you at all times.

Bofur would tell the funniest stories when you and Bombur prepared dinner with him. You could always tell it was a really good story whenever Bifur would laugh and slap your back, saying words that you could understand.

Oin shared his healing techniques with you, and you to him. It was a wonderful learning experience that would come in handy later on. He also gifted you a small satchel to carry herbs in.

Gloin always has something to say about his beloved wife and son. You would always hear groans from the other members, but you loved listening to him rant and rave about his family. It was so cute to hear how much he loved them.

Thorin and Dwalin were both tough nuts to crack. Thorin seemed to welcome you in once you spat in the face of Thranduil in Mirkwood. You ended up buttering up Dwalin on accident. You had some cookies from another passing traveler that you helped and were eating a few when you noticed him eyeing down the small bag you were holding. You tied the top of the bag and tossed it to him. He seemed frazzled at first but grunted in appreciation.

Nori was an annoyance, but you still enjoyed him. You would always find him looking over something of yours that had miraculously ‘fallen’ out of your bag. He did try teaching you how to pick-pocket, but you weren’t very good at it.

You loved Dori and Balin. They were the ones that you would always go to for advice. They were the grandparents you never had. Dori especially seemed very mothering towards you, going as far as making sure you always were close enough to the fire.

Kili was a menace when it came to his teasing. There wasn’t a day that went by without some sort of joke that would make your cheeks heat up. You were glad you could take some of the attention from Bilbo though.

You loved going to Bilbo when you needed a civilized and calm chat. You both spoke of simpler times and gardens.

Fili… Oh, Fili was something special. Despite being like his brother, there was something else about him that just completed you. When he stepped in front of you to defend you from a spider, your heart fluttered. When he waded back into the water to pull you from your barrel, your stomach did flip-flops. When he grabbed your hand for comfort when his brother was sick, you nearly exploded.

When you reached Erebor, you ended up spending even more time with him as you both were on the same schedule looking for the Arkenstone. You hated to admit it, but you’d come to fall for the blonde dwarf, and spending every waking moment with him didn’t help. You only ever confessed your crush to Bilbo when he caught you gawking at Fili who just bathed in a stream. You never dared to tell Fili, too scared to ruin what you had now.

-.-.-.-.-.-.-

After the battle of the five armies, the line of Durin returned to you tremendously wounded. We’re talking twenty minutes from death kind of injuries.

You and Oin were working around the clock trying to repair the damage that was dealt to your newfound family. Your weak heart allowed tears to fall from your eyes as you worked on Thorin, worried that they all wouldn’t make it. A few hours later you managed to stop the bleeding and suture any lacerations or mutilations.

By the twenty-sixth hour, your mind was worn out as you sat on a table mixing a salve as Oin mixed up the decoction. It was silent in the room, the only sounds being the small clinks of glass and breathing.

You jumped when you heard the door squeak open, the head of Dori popped in and you nodded at him, continuing with your work. He took this as an okay to come in, his eyes looked over the three men laying on the beds.

“How are they?” He asked, not making eye contact.

You had a grim smile on your face as you mustered up some words, “Mostly stable.”

You watched out of the corner of your eye as Oin’s head lightly drop before lifting again, You slid off the table and placed down your finished salve. You walked to Oin and plucked the decoction out of his hands.

“I’m not done with that!” He grumbled, reaching up for it. You moved it out of reach and walked to Dori, placing your empty hand on his shoulder.

“Do me a favor and get him to bed.” You pleaded, eyes looking between his.

“I don’t need to sleep. There’s much work to do!” Oin tried to argue but you just shook your head.

“It’s no help to either of us if you faint from exhaustion,” You gave him a sympathetic look. “I can handle it, don’t worry.” He grumbled a bit but didn’t fight as Nori led him out of the room.

You spent hours delicately washing the blood off of the dwarves' bodies and coating their wounds in the salve. By the time you were done and pouring small amounts of the decoction in their mouths, you were half asleep.

Your head lightly raised when a knock sounded on the door. You hummed in response as you began to gather all of the bloody tools that needed to be cleaned. The door creaked open and a grunt met your ears. You peeked over your shoulder to look at the dwarf who entered, Dwalin and it looked like Bofur was right behind him.

There was a low whistle from Bofur before he spoke, “Lass, I mean this in the nicest way,” He started. “You look terrible.”

You scoffed as you dropped the metal tools into a large basin. “I’m well aware, thank you.” You slowly blinked before turning on the water, a soft sigh leaving your lips as the cold slightly shocked you awake. Wiping your hands off on a towel, you pushed the herbs to the side now.

“Are they-” Dwalin stopped mid-sentence, seeing a sorrowful look in his eyes. You’re sure he must be in as much pain as yourself, seeing his best friend laying there.

You moved to him placing a tired hand on his shoulder in reassurance. “All alive. I’ve been keeping a keen eye on them.” You lazily smiled. You walked over to Fili’s bedside, a downcast look as you brushed the hair off his face. You closed your eyes for a moment, taking in a deep breath.

“When’s the last time you’ve slept?” Bofur asked. You thought for a moment and shrugged as you stood there.

“Not that long ago. I’m alright.” You brushed him off, opening your eyes and continuing to work on organizing the herbs back to where they were originally.

You weren’t aware of the looks that Bofur and Dwalin shared behind your back but it wasn’t long before Dwalin stepped forward and grabbed your hips, heaving you over his shoulder. A gasp slipped out of your mouth. You went to fight him, but limply hanging there only made you realize how tired you were.

“Sleep well dove!” Bofur’s voice called to your and Dwalin’s retreating form.

-.-.-.-.-.-.- 2 Weeks Later -.-.-.-.-.-.-

You and Oin had been keeping Thorin, Fili, and Kili under constant supervision. This meant 12 hours of your awake hours you spent in that room treating them.

Today, you were walking towards the room. You had a heap of books you planned to read during your downtime, but you froze in place when you could hear a voice inside the door, then a familiar laugh.

You rushed forward, books clattering to the floor, slamming the door open and looking towards where Kili lay. He was awake!

“Oh, Kili!” You cried out, running to the side of his bed and dropping to your knees. You grabbed onto his hand, excited to see one of your friends awake.

“Did you think I would die that easy?” He teased in a weak voice. You laughed and shook your head.

“I’m so grateful for that.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.- 1 Month Later -.-.-.-.-.-.-

You had been talking to Oin in the corner about making a balm for Kili to use on his own when you heard a low groan. You both turned towards Kili, expecting him to be whining about his pain again but he was staring at his uncle. You turned your gaze upon Thorin, watching his face scrunch up before his hand twitched. You quickly moved forward, bending over him and placing a hand on his shoulder.

“Thorin? Thorin can you hear me?” You asked before turning to Oin, “Can you hand me the macerate-” You were cut off by a painful hand around your arm, Thorin reeled forward screaming out a war cry.

Oin rushed to help you hold him down and attempted to calm him, but he acted as though he was still in the middle of battle. You received a good punch to the face, stumbling back before rushing forward again and holding him down with more ferocity. If it wasn’t for Kili, who stumbled into the hall and called out at the passing Dwalin, you’re sure you would have received much worse.

When Thorin finally calmed down and came to, he looked at you with a horrified expression.

“My deepest apologies, (Y/N). I thought you-” You smiled and placed a hand on his.

“Thorin, it’s alright. You’ve been through much more than I.” You reassured him with a small pat on his hand. “I’m just glad we all have you back, King under the mountain.”

-.-.-.-.-.-.- 2 Months Later -.-.-.-.-.-.-

Kili and Thorin were both mostly on their own at this point, only coming in every now and then for a tincture to help their pain.

But Fili… Fili was still sound asleep.

Every day you would talk to him as he lay in that bed. While you talked you would do things like clean him up, change his bandages, and even mix up some medicine just to prepare for the worst.

Today was draining. New dwarves were flooding into Erebor and in your free time, you were helping the others by showing the new Darrow their way around the mountain. Oin had a rough day himself and asked if you would be okay to cover his shift. You knew that nothing ever happened so you accepted.

You had just packaged up a few salves when a yawn hit you. You could probably get away with a small rest even though you knew you weren't supposed to. Your eyes glanced at the empty beds before they slowly drifted to Fili. Slowly shuffling to his bedside, you examined his features. He looked so comfortable and warm. You crawled up next to him, before carefully laying down. You lightly rested your head on his chest, ear pressing against the fabric covering his torso.

“Your heartbeat has always been so calming to me, Fee.” You hummed to yourself, letting your arm trace over a scar on his arm.

“I wish I told you how I felt before this happened. Hell, I wish I could tell you now.” You sighed, shutting your eyes and focusing on his heartbeat.

“No one is around to hear, I don’t see any harm…” You opened your eyes, moving up the bed towards his face. “I love you, Fili. From the moment I laid eyes on you I knew I did.” You placed a light kiss on his cheek.

“I would do anything just to see your smile again, to hear your laugh, to see your eyes sparkle in the sun.” You whispered before resting your head down on his chest again, slowly giving into the darkness of sleep.

You groggily blinked as you woke yourself up, unfurling yourself from Fili’s side. You grabbed onto Fili’s arm which now wrapped around your waist. You must have moved it while you rested.

“Oh Fili, your skin is so soft..” You murmured, bringing his hand up and placing a kiss on his palm.

You brought your head to rest back on his chest, “If you were awake, I would tell you how much I adored you…” you sighed. “How much I miss you…”

A few minutes passed as you laid on him, there was still so much you had to do before Oin came in, “I should probably stop talking and get to work.”

“Please keep talking, I love the sound of your voice.” A throaty voice crackled in your ear.

You let out a shrill scream as you flailed and fell off the bed with a slap against the cold stone ground. You stared up as you could hear the shifting of him on the bed.

“Fili?” You whispered as you shakily stood off the ground, his blue eyes were cracked weakly but a bright smile still played on his lips.

“Hello sweetling.” He cooed, arm feebly reaching out for you. Had it not been for your excitement of seeing him awake, you would have thought more about what he called you.

You swiftly crawled onto the bed next to him, sitting on your knees and cupping his cheeks. “Oh, Fili…” You whimpered, examining over him.”I didn’t think you were going to wake up…”

He used his hand against your back to gently direct you down until you were spooned to his side. “For a while, I dreamt of nothing. But then, it was you.” He sucked in a small breath, his hand coming down to rest on your cheek. “When I was about to give up, you came forward, urging me to return to you.”

You pressed into his hand but furrowed your eyebrows in confusion, “What are you saying?”

“I love you, (Y/N). I should have told you before I left you on the ramparts.” He whispered, “The last few days I listened to your words of adoration, and I knew you felt the same about me.” He confessed

Your breath hitched in your throat. He had heard you. He had heard it all! Your cheeks heated up as you opened your mouth to find something to say, but all that came out was a pathetic squeak.

“I want to court you.” Fili announced confidently, his smile unfaltering on his stunning face.

“Fili…” You muttered in shock, his thumb brushed away a tear that escaped your eyes.

“It doesn't have to be now,” His voice lowered to a desire-filled whisper. “But I cannot possibly stand another second knowing you are not mine.”

You shifted where you lay, choosing to instead move and hover over him. He breathed deeply as you looked over him, his free hand coming up to rest on your waist. Your stomach did backflips as you leaned down, gingerly just brushing your lips together. He quickly leaned up, locking your lips together. His lips were feathery as you both familiarized with each other. He tasted of the tincture you’d last given him, and something else that was just so uniquely him.

His hand gripped your side harder, pulling you down until you were rested on top of him. Your cheeks burned as you reached up to brush a hand against his bearded chin. You reluctantly pulled your lips apart, Fili leaned up to try and follow but you placed a hand on his chest to keep him there.

You lovingly sighed as you bent down, pressing your foreheads together. “I am yours, FIli. I always have been.”

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