#dude i was WHEEZING at the end it was not even funny

[htylmg]

love the way my doctor phrased my anemia. she said i don’t “have enough storage” in my body to hold enough iron so im not tired and dizzy all the time. like. beep boop. your free trial of functioning body has ended. let’s throw some supplements at u

[honeekyuu]

talk too much. [suna rintarou x reader]

ten. ruin

previous || masterlist || next

a/n. uhm....... yeah.

warnings: swearing, phone sex

✗ !!! minors do not interact !!! ✗

✗ !!! ignore timestamps !!! ✗

“No you didn’t-”

“I did!” Suna laughs on the other end, and you giggle into your cup in response, brain fuzzy and warm. “I walked into a room full of fourth years and pulled out my canvas and when I looked up— boom. Naked ass man, dick in my face-”

“Stop!” you wheeze, shaking your head. “How the hell did you not realize-”

“I was nervous! I was so nervous to be there that I didn’t even realize I was in the wrong fucking room.”

“Did you leave?!”

“No! Of course I fucking didn’t!” You hear two sharp thuds on the other end and know just by the sound that Suna’s pounding his fist on the table. “I tunnel-visioned my way into a nude modeling class as a first year — you really think I had the courage to get up and leave after that?” 

You take a long sip of your mixed drink, leaning back against the arm of your couch and sighing deep after you swallow. “So? Then what happened?”

“Uh – I missed syllabus day of Art as Identity and drew a charcoal recreation of some random guy’s penis. Komori has it framed in his kitchen. It’s a talking point for guests and friends alike.” 

“I can’t believe you’re this much of an introvert,” you say, shaking your head with a giddy grin. “You’re so loud with me-”

“Okay, go ahead and add salt to the wound-” he barks sarcastically, snickering when you break into laughter. 

“You’re funny, Suna,” you say openly after a minute, sighing into the admission. “More people should know how funny you are.” 

“Just you’s enough, I think — and maybe your friends, just so they like me,” he responds, quiet filling the space between you for a moment. You chew on your lip while you think.

“What’d you think of them?” you whisper after a moment. “My friends.”

“Your friends?” he repeats, confusion seeping into his voice. “I mean, I always thought Suga was a weird dude, but he’s overall pretty chill and funny. Especially with Alisa – they fight a lot, don’t they?”

You smile fondly. “She likes to make him angry. He’s really easy to rile up.”

“Yeah, I could tell. They seem like good friends. I feel like I got to know you better by meeting them.”

You sigh quietly, the question burned into your mind starting to feel like guilt. You shouldn’t ask, because the truth is that your friends are the perfect friends. They’re both perfect, and you don’t know where you’d be without them. And you’re not in the habit of comparing yourself to your best friend, because you know she’d kill you for doing that.

But still, the question lingers.

“And… Alisa?” you ask, feeling the terrible guilt burn in your throat like bile. “What’d you think of her?” 

You can hear the wheels turning in Suna’s head, the silence on his end growing haunting as the seconds tick by.

“I think she’s beautiful,” he says, and – through the horrible, disappointed swooping in your gut – you realize that him being this honest even when he can tell what’s bothering you only makes you trust him more. He knows what you’re looking for, and he makes no move to sugarcoat his thoughts for you. Your respect for him grows. “But me acknowledging that she’s beautiful and me having feelings for you can both be true. Can’t they?”

You shut your eyes, sighing. You feel like an idiot. “Yes.”

“Just because your best friend is beautiful, that doesn’t mean you’re not.”

“I know.”

“I can think she’s beautiful and also think you’re the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen-”

“Oh, my God,” you laugh, embarrassed. “I get it, Suna. It was a stupid question.”

“Yeah, it was,” he says, and you can hear his smile. “Promise not to do it again?”

“No,” you mutter. He laughs.

“Okay. I can live with that.” You feel the conversation end there, and, despite the embarrassment, you feel glad that you asked. “I was thinking about something a minute ago actually,” he says, interrupting your thought. “You call me by my last name.” 

You quirk an eyebrow, the previous conversation forgotten, and purse your lips. “Is it not your name?” 

“Yeah, but…” He swallows audibly and then laughs to himself. “Your friends also call me Suna.”

You warm, seeing where this is going. “Would you rather me call you Rintarou?” His name feels foreign in your mouth, as if your tongue is just as nervous as you are, but you kind of like the taste of it.

His name feels important.

The other end of the line goes completely silent, long enough that you pull your phone away from your face to check that the call’s still connected. 

“Shit,” he breathes finally. “I dunno anymore. I was gonna suggest it, but I dunno if I can handle that, Y/n.”

Your name sounds important on his tongue, too.

Your chest starts to flutter with nerves, but the alcohol wants you to push it. “What about Rin?” It tastes intimate and presumptuous, that cut of his name from three syllables to one. You want him to taste it, too.

“Christ,” he laughs. “God, Y/n. You tryna kill me? You sent your friends to wound me critically and now this?”

“I think I like that one, actually,” you breathe. “Rin.”

“Stop it,” he laughs weakly.

“Rin.” You roll it around in your mouth, sinking deeper into your couch while you consider it.

“Cut it out,” he whispers, soft and breathy.

“Rinnie.” You like the way your lips wrap around it. You like the space it takes up and the way your voice cradles it, round and warm.

“Y/n.” His voice isn’t round and warm. It’s sharp. Thick with warning. Dragging your own name down your back like the back of a blade, leaving your skin pebbled with goosebumps and the base of your spine tugging at a knot under your navel dangerously. “Cut it out.”

You shiver and press your thighs together. “Okay,” you breathe, a soft whine coating the sound. The alcohol wants you to push your luck, and it’s so wonderfully easy to listen. “Sorry, Rinnie.”

“Shit,” he groans quietly. “Don’t do this to me, Y/n. Please.”

“Do what?”

“You know exactly fucking what.”

Your stomach flips at his tone, and there’s a pulse of desire between your thighs that has you biting down hard on your bottom lip. Your head is warm and staticky and desperately likes the sound of Suna’s voice, especially when he talks to you like that. 

“So?” you whisper, the courage there but incredibly small and entirely driven the liquor in your cup. “Are you hard?” 

Suna’s exhale is sharp, surprised. “W-What?” 

“You said over text.” Your face burns, but the idea of Suna Rintarou getting turned on by a combination of your voice and the way you say his name has you pushing out of your comfort zone. You want him too much. “That if I called you, you’d get hard. Are you?” 

He breathes hard for a beat, the sound shaky. And then he whispers, the sound soft and right in your ear in the most delicious way. 

“You know I am, pretty girl.” 

“How long?”

“Since you said my name.”

You shiver, pressing your thighs together hard. The flip of your nerves, low in your gut, is sharpened and heightened by the buzz of vodka in your veins, and you gasp quietly, trying to bring your heart rate back to normal.

“You should do something about that,” you whisper, skin vibrating when you do. You’d never be this confident sober.

He whines in response.

Suna Rintarou whines in your ear, desperate and impossible to deny. 

You feel your body become addicted to a man you’ve never met. 

“‘re you sure?” he breathes. “I don’t wanna do anything that you don’t-“

“Want you to do it,” you whisper, pulse racing and legs damn near going numb from how nervous you are. “Wanna hear you touch yourself.”

“Fuck,” he says, sharp and laced with frustration. “Fuck, Y/n — how am I supposed to say no to that?”

“You’re not,” you try. “Unless you really don’t want t-“

“I do. Fuck, I do.” He sounds the most sober he’s sounded all night, direct and honest and making your heart feel like it’s going to rip out of your chest. “Will-I…” You hear him swallow. “Will you do it, too? Are you turned on?” 

Your heart jumps into your throat, hope and desire mixing dangerously with the vodka. “Yes.” 

“What’s that an answer to?” he laughs, weak and nervous. 

“Both.” 

“Fuck,” he groans. “Will you? Want you to feel good, too.”

“Really?” Your voice sounds insecure, even in your own ears. You still aren’t used to that — to him. 

“Yes,” he urges. “God, yes. I want to make you feel good so badly, baby.” He swallows. “Can I talk to you? Make you feel good like that?” Your shaky exhale must speak for you, because he just gives another weak laugh. “Yeah? Is that okay?”

You’ve never been so full of want that it makes you cry, but you’re pretty damn close at this singular moment in time. 

“Okay,” you say, voice wavering. Suna’s exhale on the other line is just as shaky. 

“Okay,” he whispers back. “Shit-Uhm. C-Can I have a picture, baby? If that’s okay?” 

You whine in protest, already embarrassed, but you can hear how nervous he is. How unused to this he is. That this is just as terrifying and embarrassing for him, that he’s putting himself out there for you. 

It would be rude not to reciprocate. 

You take a steeling breath and pull the phone away from your face, setting it on the coffee table and putting it on speakerphone. “I look kind of messy,” you say. You start to adjust your clothes, grimacing at the frumpy shirt and shorts you’re wearing.

“I like messy,” he says, and you laugh pathetically. 

“It’s not very sexy.” You pull your hair down and ruffle it to be as attractive as possible, and then you consider your shorts for a full two seconds before throwing caution to the wind and getting rid of them. They land on the floor with an audible fwip, and Suna’s silent on the other end.

“Please tell me you didn’t just take all your clothes off,” he breathes finally. “I don’t know if I’m in a state to emotionally handle that right now.” 

You giggle, face burning and heart pounding in your ears as you open your camera and angle it favorably. ”Not all my clothes.”

“Shit.” 

You cross one arm over your torso and use it to push your breasts up, watching them swell in the camera. A rush of heat burns at your ears and neck, and your lip wobbles while you take the picture. 

Lifting the phone close, you examine the photo. You can see all the flaws that you’ve always seen, and it makes you freeze with insecurity. Makes you want to delete it and back out.

But then you hear him, his quiet ‘baby?’ on the other end, and you remember who you’re talking to. 

You hope he won’t see all the flaws you do — but there’s a piece of you that knows he will see them, but not as flaws. Because that’s who he is. 

Breath held tight in your lungs, you send off the photo, and then your head starts to pound with anxiety. 

Will he like it? Will he think it’s awkward? Will he realize that maybe he thinks you’re pretty, but he’s not sexually attracted to you the way he thought he would be—

“Oh, holy shit-” Suna’s voice is tight, thick with an emotion that’s so clearly lust that even you can’t deny it. ”Holy shit, Y/n. You’re so fucking-” He cuts off, taking a shuddering breath. “Fuck, I might start drooling.” 

You laugh, the tension breaking a little. “You’re funny-”

“I’m not joking.” Your breath catches at the sharp snap of his voice — your heart lurches, and desire swirls violently in your gut, because Suna Rintarou’s voice is starting to do that to you. “I’m not fucking joking, Y/n — you’re the sexiest girl I’ve ever seen.” 

You blink, sinking low on the couch. “What?” 

“Fuck,” he groans. “Y/n, you turn me on so much. I’m so fucking-” He laughs. “God, it’s embarrassing.” 

Your fingers shake as you press the phone desperately to your ear. “You’re so fucking what?” you ask meekly, nervous but craving more with every second that passes. 

He laughs again, self-deprecating. “I’m so fucking hard right now. Because of you. Because of this one photo.”

Your free hand drops between your thighs before you can think too long about it. “And you haven’t done anything about it yet?” 

“Oh, my God,” he groans, and you can hear the want in his voice. The strain in his tone as he tries to keep himself in line. “God, I’m not gonna last. I’m not gonna last with you, Y/n.” 

The pads of your fingers press to your clothed clit when he says your name — important, full — and it makes your desire curl and snap. You moan quietly, pursing your lips together to stop the sound — just a moment too late. 

“Fuuuck-” he says, reacting immediately to your voice. You hear shuffling, and then a burning, brutal exhale of relief, and you know he’s touching himself. The low whine trapped in his throat tells you as much. Tells you how badly he’s trying to keep his head on straight for you.  

You don’t want him to do that. You want him as lost as you are.

So you shut your eyes and lean your head back and let the alcohol take control. Let the fuzzy static in your head grow louder, let the desire throbbing in your core grow stronger. Let the choked whine in Suna’s throat take over, pulling you that much closer to the edge.

“Rin,” you breathe, yielding control to your limbs and smothering all hesitation in favor of slipping your hand past the band of your underwear. When your fingers touch down to your core, cold fingertips to searing hot skin, you moan louder. Loud enough to be heard and not caring enough to stop it. “Fuck, Rin— Can I have a picture, too?” He groans on the other line, shaky and uneven, and you whine in response. “Please? It’s only fair…”

He doesn’t say a single word back — just gives a trembling breath when you beg — but your phone buzzes against your face a moment later.

He’s got his hand down his sweats, the outline of his cock clear and the outline of his hand wrapped around it even clearer. His face is flushed a deep, searing red, and his parted lips are swollen and pink, eyes hooded with desire as he looks up into the camera. 

He’s in bed. He’s in bed, drunk and touching himself while thinking about you — the you in the photo, the you on your couch, touching yourself while you think about him, too. 

“Christ,” you whisper, eyes flying across the screen while your fingers dip low and slip with terrible ease past your entrance — two fingers in, the stretch heavenly, when your eyes land on the outline of his cock. “I don’t know if I can take you, Rinnie.” 

His inhale is shocked and laced with a moan, and then he’s coming undone in your ear. 

“You can take it, baby. I know you can take me so well.”

“Oh, God,” you gasp, back arching off the couch and fingers curling hard against your walls. “You would make me-”

“Gonna make you take it,” he finishes in a voice so rough and broken that you know he’s stopped trying to keep control, too. “Wanna make you take it, wanna show you how good you are for me. How much you’re made for me-”

“Oh, my God, I’m-”

“Wanna make you come around me. Wanna make you fall apart on my cock, pretty girl.”

“Rin,” you squeak in warning, your gut curling hard with desire, tension so close to snapping. “Rinnie, I-”

“Want my name on your tongue when I come inside you.” His voice is pitching up, breath stuttering and syllables twisting short in his mouth. “Want my name in your mouth when I ruin you for anyone else.”

It’s only right, then, that you cry his name when your orgasm slams into you full-force, pulsing and crashing down over you without warning.

By the time you come back to yourself, your walls are twitching with aftershocks around your fingers, and your breath is loud and heavy in your ears. 

Suna’s own breath is shaky in your ears, too. He whispers your name, tired and drained but still full. Still important.

You might have ruined him for anyone else, too.

[weirdbeancurd]

Ticklish Wolverine Headcanons! (sfw of course, but if you don't like, don't read)

i might do one with Wade later

Logan  Sensitivity: 9/10

Ironically cannot stand clawing or nibbling, poor dude will arch his back to the high heavens

Swats Wade's hand away when he tries to “give the kitty some chin scritches” because it tickles (and it’s embarrassing)

Common headcanon but he growls to keep the giggles at bay, it works for a whole 10 seconds and devolves into angry laughing

Folds like a lawn chair if a bad spot is suddenly attacked, has headbutt Wade before and got tickled twice as hard as a result

Absolutely pooped after being wrecked, will just lie there in a heap and maybe doze off, Wade uses it to help with his insomnia, Logan is secretly grateful (but will never admit it)

Wade told Laura about Logan’s “sensitivity” and she now uses it as a threat, old man being too grumpy? Poke him in the side as a warning. Logan’s smartass remarks getting on her nerves? Tase his ribs.

On some nights, he’ll barely fight back and just take it, becomes very flustered when it’s pointed out

Worst spots are underarms, stomach and hips, thrashes wildly when any of these spots are attacked, until he realizes he can't escape and just goes limp as a biscuit 

Sooo stubborn, will actually die before admitting that he doesn’t mind being tickled

Tickling is pretty much the only thing that can get him to beg and Wade loves it, I mean who wouldn’t want the bragging right of getting the mighty Wolverine to plead for mercy

All 5 of his senses are enhanced, touch included, it helps him track people by their footsteps…and makes him ridiculously ticklish

While rough tickles will still destroy him, light tickles fluster him much more, he’s just so unused to such a gentle touch and embarrassed a small graze makes him flinch out of his skin

Face burns red when teased (but don't mock him too much or he'll get actually angry), might try to hide facedown on the couch/floor/a pillow, Wade always makes it a game to see how fast he can make Logan turn over and expose his burning face

Usually this does the trick: digging into the muscles on either side of his spine (lower back) will get him to cackle and slam his palm on the bed/floor repeatedly, until he finally relents and flips to face Wade again (yes this is based on a bluebully fic lol)

Tries to bite fingers when his neck or ears are tickled, tends to end badly for him even if (especially if) Wade ends up losing a finger or two

Snorts, wheezes, shrieks, we got it all folks, but giggles are mostly caused by light tickles since he's just too sensitive, anything more intense and his laugh gets pretty wild

Sneaking up on him is real difficult, but if you manage to catch him off guard, his claws will pop out on instinct, Wade found this out the hard way, but still does it all the time because it’s funny

Probably needs to be pinned or he’ll break someone's nose with his flailing, (usually) not on purpose

[hils79]

Hils Watches Lovely Runner - Ep 8

I knew he dug up the time capsule before they got rid of the tree!

Look at him rehearsing how to look chill. I love him

OH SHIIIIII! The serial killer is out of jail! Wait, how is he out of jail? And why is no one keeping tabs on him to make sure he doesn't go after Im Sol again?

Sometimes I forget that Korea is a very conservative country until a woman freaks out at the prospect of being alone in a hotel with a man. Can't possibly have sex when we're not married or even dating!

LMAO she gave this whole big speech that she has nothing against people who have casual sex but she has more traditional values and he let say all that and was like 'we're just going to the bar to have a drink'. I love them they are both so ridiculous.

So much for those conservative values 😂

I mean how bad can a gift from a gaming company be?

HAHA! I mean it could definitely be worse than a carboard cutout sexy video game girl

NOOOO! Don't hide it in your bed! Hide it under the bed! Or in the closet! Dude! This is not going to end well for you I can see it coming.

He thought it was funny when she was very insistent that she didn't want to have sex with him. Now he thinks she wants to and he's scandalised. Shoe's on the other foot now :D

Sunjae. Sunjae, that magazine you are pretending to casually read is upside down. Sunjae...

I'm not an idol who has to watch their weight so I'll just eat in front of you

Now he thinks she has legit prophetic dreams because when they were at school she told him she had a dream he got hurt and couldn't swim anymore, which then happened.

How did she manage to spill this much ramen all over her sweater and jeans. The bowl was pretty much empty when they showed it a couple of minutes ago

She is a tiny girl and you are a very tall man. I think it will definitely be too big

Not sure why he let her change in his bedroom after they made a big fuss about how it wasn't appropriate for her to be in a man's bedroom earlier. But also, LMAO, the time capsule he denied going to get because he was trying to be cool is right there on the table.

I AM WHEEZING! Dude, why did you use your entire duvet to cover the time capsule? Like what was the plan after that? Anyway, now his secret video game girl fetish has been exposed. They are both such disasters I love them so much.

I am such a sucker for 'accidentally falling on top of each other'. Even more if they accidentally fall into a kiss. It's so stupid but I never get tired of seeing it.

Oops. Busted.

Ah, so that's why she stopped seeing him. I totally get it she went through something incredibly traumatic. It's just sad that the person she loves and who loves her reminds her of that time.

Come on you need to tell him that you went too. You just arrived a bit late and missed him.

YAY!

YAY!

I legit keep forgetting about this dude

This is very random but it's nice to see someone working in a well lit office. So many kdramas have people working with just a tiny little desk lamp to see by and all the main lights are off for no reason

I'm assuming the sasaeng that Im Sol got mistaken for is going to become plot relevant at some point. God, is she going to try and kill Im Sol? Like she doesn't have enough problems with a serial killer already after her

Wait, am I supposed to know who this is? Im Sol looked really shocked when she saw her face

Why have you taken her out for dinner instead of calling the cops? Is it just because of how young she is?

OH SHIT!!

OMG was he after Sunjae this whole time?

[osamucide]

plastic jesus

i don't care if it rains or freezes long as i got my plastic jesus sittin on the dashboard of my car!

wc: 1.5k

cw: gn! reader, dark era, alcohol, smoking, canon-typical violence, dazai-typical suicide mentions/attempts, language, fluff, crack?

reid: kind of chuuya's pov? he is so done with you both. bless his soul. you may also find this on my ao3 linked in my pinned. enjoy :)

. . . .ᐟ

The only other one to have been plucked up out of the dirt by the demon prodigy himself was that brat, Nakahara.

Okay, he wasn't that bad. He was a brat, yes, but you and Dazai certainly played your part in influencing him, and it wasn't like he'd ever take your place. Reason number one on a long list: the kid couldn't hold his liquor.

Teikyuu, some PM-adjacent bar, was your agreed-upon (by you and Dazai; Nakahara tagged along with only half of his own consent) haunt for the night. The interior was dark and decently crowded, dingy but cozy enough to be homely through the air of bar-typical disgust; a speaker pumped out bass from somewhere or another - it was reliable, wandering eyes minimal. When Dazai insisted on a fourth round of shots of American tequila, Nakahara laid his fiery head on the bar, groaning.

"What's wrong, Chibi-chan? Chibi-chan can't hang!" Dazai took every opportunity he could to taunt him. He reached across your lap to shove Nakahara's head upward, outward. "C'mon, Chibikko. You're a fuckin' bummer." Three more shot glasses, packets of salt, and lime slices were dealt in front of you.

Chuuya swatted him away, catching you in the crossfire. "Fuck off, dude, 'have s' much shit to do tomorrow." But shit to do would have to be done violently hungover, judging from the ginger's current state. You wedged yourself between the two before they could embarrass themselves.

"Chu-chan, you're whining," you chuckled, and his face grew as red as his hair.

"Am not! 'M not fucking whining," he insisted, but it sounded even whinier than before.

"Then do this shot with me." You nudged the little clear glass toward him while Osamu took up his own. Chuuya grumbled out a fine. There was one problem: Chuuya couldn't shoot his alcohol no matter how hard he tried, especially when he was already drunk. He didn't understand what the hell it was you two saw (or rather, tasted) in the rancid liquid that made you so eager to down it so cleanly. Regularly, his shots dribbled from the corners of his mouth onto his shirt, or he'd only get halfway through it, and he'd receive a firm reprimanding from one or both of you about wasting the precious substance. He preferred wine, or if he was in rare form cherry schnapps, but no one goes to the bar to drink wine! The two of you would never let him hear the end of it, so he drank the god damn tequila.

The three of you toasted to "your mom," having dedicated your previous three toasts to "this dick" (Osamu), "being enemies of the state" (you), and "how fucking much the two of you make me want to choke on my own vomit and die" (Chuuya). By the time you had downed yours, face clean and unmoved, Chuuya was still looking at his shot contemplatively.

"If you don't want it-"

He took it.

"'Atta boy, kid."

Both you and Osamu watched expectantly, enthusiastically for the recoil. Chuuya's face twisted up, and you poked the lime in his direction. When he coughed and looked toward you with teary eyes and a red nose, you and Osamu giggled like children.

"'S not-" He coughed a bit more. "'S not funny, assholes!"

But it was very funny to you, and the two of you only laughed harder as he hailed a cup of water. Amidst your fit, you nearly tipped your barstool backward - Chuuya might've moved to catch you if you weren't being so goddamn insufferable (and his head wasn't whirling), but his stomach barely had time to drop as Osamu was clumsily wrapping you, chair back and all, in his lanky arms, so short of breath from cracking up that he was almost wheezing. After you were upright again you continued to laugh for such a long time that Chuuya, in his disoriented and half-dissociated state, thought perhaps you'd both finally lost your god damn fucking minds. He was going to have to find his way home, hammered and alone, all because you and Osamu were flaming inebriated morons.

And then you got quiet. And Chuuya grew genuinely concerned, because the two of you were usually anything but (he'd learned that well enough from living sandwiched between both of your rooms in that crummy ass apartment building for the longest three-week period of his life). But you were just being even stupider now - foreheads pressed against one another as you calmed back into the steady drone of the bar music, whispering some things back and forth that he wasn't meant to hear.

Chuuya gagged audibly, and it had nothing to do with the taste in his mouth.

An hour and three shots later, you slipped your poor bartender a generous stack of bills and stumbled your way into the street. It was beyond Chuuya how you two seemed to be able to maintain a straight line as you walked - he trailed a bit behind you, feeling like the unfortunate lovechild of a pair of teen parents. You stopped to light up a cigarette (also an American brand) and he ran into you. He wanted to push back at the way you snorted, but he realized you were only doing so because he was toppling and you were holding him up. He bit back his bitching. You were stupid, sure, but he did let you drag him along after all, and his blood felt too hot and his mouth felt too sticky for him to send shots right now.

"You want a hit, Chu-chan?" But he waved you away because nicotine probably would've made him yark immediately.

Not once in Chuuya's short visceral life had he ever seen someone fluster Osamu Dazai until you, and vice versa. It made him nauseous to admit it was sort of cute, but even further, he'd never admit it made him nauseous because, truly, the two of you found joy in nauseating people with how in love you were. Though he'd never heard those words out of either of your mouths, it was excruciatingly obvious that you were two sides of the same coin. You looped your arm around his, Dazai took the other, and he trotted along in his stupor with your help, sandwiched in between you once again (and equally as annoyed about it as he was before). The smoke never left your fingers but Osamu hit it often, lifted to his lips above Chuuya's head. You guys talked about something, but he could barely keep up. He was fucking obliterated. All he knew was that your words joined seamlessly with Dazai's, your banter flowed like dual-colored beads being strung alternatingly down a cord, and the warmth between the two of you made him feel kind of soft. He knew that later in the early morning he'd be hunched over the toilet - he could picture it vividly, you would be pushing his hair back, Osamu would be calling him a pussy but rubbing his shoulder every so often, and it would be horribly gross and embarrassing and he'd feel like hot garbage - and yet, he'd undoubtedly still get the sense that he was sitting in the backseat of a honeymoon car.

He looked up at you once in the blur of the a.m. and took note of how rosily you glowed, and when he turned toward Dazai, it was like a mirror. Chuuya was aware of that list, too, and none of you were idiots - no matter how much Mori pushed it, no matter what Twin Dark even meant, you alone were the sole complement to Osamu, the dead ringer, the only one fully cognizant of and attuned to his turbulent unpredictability. Perhaps that was why you were heading toward the water with him now.

"You fuck!" one of you called; he wasn't sure which. Chuuya was too busy crumbling to the ground in a puddle of himself, sweaty and pinching your cigarette between his fingers. When had that gotten there?

And you chased Osamu off the rocks into the river, current unhurried, undemanding against both of your bodies when you fell in. Chuuya didn't think too much of it when you bobbed under, because he knew you'd come back up connected at the lips - no, ever since you, Dazai hadn't really wanted to kill himself. Not yet. He knew it that day you all went to get high at the beach when you asked him to jump in with you and he hesitated for the smallest second. Not human? Chuuya wanted to laugh. Dazai had suffered, yes, but Dazai had loved. That conceded dissent in that beat of silence was the most human thing one could hope to achieve, and god damn it, Dazai had done it, with everything he was, in the face of the human he loved the most. He'd jumped in with you anyway, but there was no intent to die.

Without fail, you both walked him back home, drenched.

[turtle-bun]

“This iteration of the Turtles and this iteration of the Turtles wouldn’t get along cuz of this!” “These two iterations wouldn’t get along because of that!”

FUCK YOU THEY ARE ALL BEST FRIENDS THAT SUPPORT EACH OTHER CUZ I SAY SO!!

(Please note I wrote this BEFORE watching Mutant Mayhem which is why they aren’t in it. I just forgot to post it lol 😅)

Rise!Leo: You all are so stern and serious. I feel like I should start being more stern and serious. Should I?

BatmanVs!Leo: Please don’t, it’ll be hell on your already waning mental health. /hj

Bayverse!Leo: I feel we need at least one funny Leo to break up the collective seriousness of the rest of us.

87 Leo: I thought me and my brothers counted as the “funny” version of all of us?

12 Leo: You guys are more of a “silly” version of us…sillier? Like the concept of turtles being ninjas is already silly as it is. Which there is nothing wrong with that, just that your cartoon logic is just very hard to keep up with sometimes.

87 Leo: That’s understandable.

Mirage Leo: I’m just jealous that you all get to be in color. Black and white gets so boring once you learn there’s color!

07 Leo: But your universe does have this cool graphic design to it that I’M very jealous of.

03 Leo: Of course, you fucking would be you dramatic edgelord. /j

07 Leo: I know the fucking EMO of the group did not just call me an edgelord! /j

Rise!Leo: Omg we love an E-girl!

12 Leo: *wheeze of laughter*

---

87 Raph: I just don’t think it’s fair that you guys get to be tall, is all! It’s discrimination! /hj

12 Raph: Practically working against your own kind! /j

Rise!Raph: *snorts* I don’t think that’s a bodily function we can control you guys!

Bayverse!Raph: It was a conscious decision on my end.

Rise!Raph: *chokes with laughter*

87 Raph: You goddamn bastard! /j

Bayverse!Raph: Cope and seeth my dude.

07 Raph: Now look, 87 I know it’s very difficult, especially for you, but we gotta be the bigger person here.

87 Raph: I will kick your goddamn ass, kid!

03 Raph: Well, good for you in being the bigger person. I will continue to be small and petty my entire life!

*Collective snorting laughter from all Raphs*

87 Raph: No, no, wait! You are not allowed to be funnier than me!

03 Raph: Tough break, shorty, I have to have SOMETHING other than punching shit.

87 Raph: Take up knitting! I don’t care! Just keep away from my bit! That’s like my entire personality! /hj

03 Raph: See you joke about that but I am fucking GREAT at knitting!

Bayverse!Raph: Amen to that! I ain’t spend half my damn life in the Hashi and NOT be able to knit a fucking epic scarf!

---

07 Donnie: Are you saying I worked a 9 to 5 job FOR NOTHING!

BatmanVs!Donnie: I honestly did not think that embezzling funds from rich corporate assholes plus the Shredder and his Foot Clan was an actual option we had!

12 Donnie: I am actually so mad that I did not think of that!

Rise!Donnie: Honestly, I didn’t think of it until like a few years back because our dad is still, somehow, getting royalties from his Lou Jitsu movie days. But I also have expensive taste in equipment and needed a little pocket change.

03 Donnie: I could have actually bought a Play Station when it came out instead of having to fix up the broken one Mikey found in the dump!

87 Donnie: I’m just now realizing how much stuff we had to make from scratch just because we couldn’t afford it.

Rise!Donnie: That’s true. But like also you guys still made a bunch of cool stuff with JUST junk you found! That’s amazing!

Bayverse!Donnie: Thanks but we could have made even cooler stuff if we had your type of funding. I mean, look at this shit! *excitingly pointing at Rise!Donnie’s battle shell*

Rise!Donnie: Please understand that YOU have made holo-screen, intercom, wrist watches, that connect to your motherboard home computer. All of which you MADE WITH JUNK! How is that not amazing?!

07 Donnie: Amazing for you probably. But if I were to do that shit myself I wouldn’t sleep for a week!

BatmanVs!Donnie: I second that! One sugar daddy please!

Rise!Donnie: *wheeze of laughter*

---

03 Mikey: I still can't believe you met freaking BATMAN! Like holy shit dude!

12 Mikey: *sobbing* I’m so jealous! I’m forever jealous!

BatmanVs!Mikey: Yeah, it was pretty cool. But YOU (03 Mikey) met the entire Justice Force! And became a member! Your legacy was so awesome Silver Sentry’s grandson took up your name!

03 Mikey: Yeah but you road in the BATMOBILE and got to press all the buttons!

Bayverse!Mikey: *sulking on the floor* LIFE ISN’T FAIR AND I HATE IT HERE!

Rise!Mikey: *pouting* I never get to meet my heroes! And when I do they turn out to be insane!

12 Mikey: Bro same! Chris Brandford was just a giant jerk!

87 Mikey: Bugman was pretty cool, though maybe a little weird. Still, he was no Justice Force or Batman!

07 Mikey: *whining* I just want the life you have! Why does god ALWAYS have favorites?!

Ronin!Mikey: *dramatic sigh of jealousy* He truly does.

[jade-kyo]

RvB 20th rewatch: s5

Final season of Blood Gulch let’s goooo!!!

Honestly can’t blame Church for his reaction to Junior lol

I CANT FEEL MY TORSO

“My body is trying to die” me when I’m on my period

I’m gonna start using the international dibs protocol

DONUT IS CHURCH’S FAVORITE RED

THERE IS NO ELEVEN YOU FUCKING WHORE

KAKAINA!!!!!!!!!!

She’s so silly. She is the silly girl representation we deserve.

The fat Church jokes are so funny because HE HAS A ROBOT BODY???? bro literally cannot gain or lose weight and that’s all I can think about every time I watch it 😂

Have we ever considered sargenut-

GOOD DAD TUCKER

“there are no regular girls” as a girl I agree

I love that Kai doesn’t even question Church being a ghost

“Whoa, tread lightly dude, tread lightly” and another heavily quoted line for me

Mark your calendars for 2040 for the updated Bible release

So dead serious when I say I’m gonna start using Donuts anti drug lingo when my friends start vaping

CHEX DIVORCED VIBES MY BELOVED

OMG I FORGOT ABOUT CABOOSE PRACTICING FLIRTING WITH TEX AHKDHAKSH

Okay but have we considered texboose crack ship

Caboose is me trying to lie

“I’m like Superman, I know when I’m needed” Tucker you are always needed my beloved son

WHEEZE OMG SIMMONS JUST DROPPED THE MOST AGGRESSIVE “SHUT UP DONUT” IVE EVER HEARD AHKSHAK

Donut writes Harry Potter fanfiction

Church immediately asks about Carolina….. Church the alpha… the copy of the director, Carolina’s father, immediately asks about Carolina. In all his fucked up faulty memories he knows to ask about her… I’m gonna be sick

Tex’s willingness to go along with the time travel bit is so funny

“No I’m saving him in case we ever need him for food” another frequently quoted line.

GOOD DAD TUCKER

Bow chick honk honk

Sarge’s super power is spawning in flags and patriotic singing

“Take a chill pill, don’t have a chill pill take one of them chill strips. You stick it on your tongue it dissolves and you chill” probably my most quoted line from the show. Partially cause my brothers would always say it so I just grew up hearing it even before I watched rvb

“No one is in the state of Wyoming” yet another quoted line

Church being upset when Caboose gets shot is very telling

So is Wyoming using his equipment without Gammas help? That’s wild

TUCKER FINALLY GETS THE SNIPER RIFLE

Hey chicka bum bum

THE HELL IS THAT MUSIC

the Tex stuff at the end is probably the hardest thing to make sense of with all the retcons- like was she just saying all that stuff to try and protect Church… somehow- yeah this is the part I always struggle to fit in with the rest of it

I still enjoy the shenanigans tho

Rip Florida

God I love when O’Malley is jumping from person to person

TEX SAYS GOODBYE G O D I AM IN HELL

And it comes full circle

AND NOW IT IS TIME FOR THE RECOLLECTION!! I am so freaking excited I cannot WAIT!

[giggly-squiggily]

i have five episodes of hell's paradise left and this show is gonna be the end of me istg

no i'm sorry i'm just saying stuff but how is it. squiggily. squiggily tell me. how is it that everybody's getting flashbacks and inner monologues when they're about to die. EXCEPT FOR EIZEN.

reo (idk his name. purple man. the guy who tried to go home and ended on the ship wrecks.) got a whole ass speech to sagiri and gabimaru, even tho we didn't even know he was gonna die! the blond little guy that's traveling with the swordsmaster got a speech about his passion for dissecting corpses and nothing even happened to him!

bakugo and muichiro (idk their names either) got a whole damn episode! eiji (?) got a whole conversation with sagiri and got into her head enough to give her a breakthrough in battle! tenza got a backstory that was so well made that it was also shion's backstory! nurugai got a backstory! nurugai didn't even die!!

i'm acting pissed but i'm not because it's great storytelling, i genuinely enjoy the show and it's good enough for me to see more of eizen through the lens of other characters but not one eizen centered flashback for rey? not one?? 🥺🥺

(all this to say once your next event rolls around i'm probably gonna have an eizen request lol)

NANZNANXNNSNDNSN REY I CANT- 🤣🤣🤣 This ask tickled my funny bone so hard HELP!

BUT SERIOUSLY WHAT IS THIS EIZAN UNJUSTICE??? Not that he had much to add besides being hot but like- SIR. WE NEED BACKGROUND DETAILS!

Kishyo! (Ren) that’s so true, AND FUCHI!!! Oh god I love Fuchi- he’s such a weird little dude! 🤣 He travels with the big dude- Gantetsusai!

STOP NOT BAKUGOU AND MUICHIRO QHXBWNNDNWNDNS 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I let out such a wheeze! Chobe (Bakugou) and Toma (Muichiro); the Aza brothers and some of my favorites! 🤣 and that one guy! Genji!

“Nurugai didn’t even die!” HELP QJZNWNDNNWND I’m sorry- the audacity of her to live and have a backstory! /j 🤣🤣🤣🤣

No truly- I knew he was kinda whatever in the long term of the story but STILL! I can’t remember if we get more of him or not in the manga? But yeah! I’m glad you’re enjoying the show!!! It’s so GOOD! (Despite the Eizen disrespect of course)

((bestie you don’t even need to wait- feel free to send me one, I’ll gladly make it for you! 💖 He needs more love! They all do really!))

[justanotherpersonsuniverse]

CAP CHAPTER 74 ROCKED

AND I WROTE THINGS HERE YA GO

SPOILERS BELOW!!!

Yknow i had to do it to em (play eye of the tiger based off of the chapter title, i think I’ll play gonna fly too, training montage music) 

EXCELLENT START. 

Love the dialogue already, Rena I love you dearly. 

I know you made the massive time skip because of your break from Panthera while writing, But i do actually quite like how it means they’ve been at this for almost a full year by now

Insane for this. “Yes and no, that was Ladybug’s training” 

The fuck will she do to them. I am so ready to find out

SHE’S SO INTENSE I LOVE HER LOVE THIS SIDE OF HER

I hope LB doesn’t interfere too much, I want to see how everyone deals with this side of Panthera

It’s hard to be fast at falling- hHA i am actually wheezing, i love this

Help this is awesome

I’m terrible at commenting on action, but this flows really smoothly and I’m loving how Panthera is explaining shit to them while they are flailing 

I feel like LB will be pulled in to make a point about team work

How is she wearing a hat with the cat ears

Awww Anarka tips cute

I love this

I enjoy Panthera beating hte three of their asses

I’m really waiting for the moment the tension between LB and Panthera explodes, because the push and pull between them can’t keep up like this! Especially because you have hinted at the Akuma becoming more dangerous 

Thats an argument / conversation I can’t wait to read.

Well i can wait, I would rather things are appropriately set up and you were happy with writing them Cap. does that make sense?

Help not Chloe hating Nadia, tbh she gives me bad vibes considering how ready she was to use children to boost her own show rating. 

Also, stealing a reporters microphone is such a funny idea.

JULEKA YOU THICK HEADED IDIOT NOTICE WHO RENA IS PELASE I BEG OF THEE

I still find it funny that Juleka is so bothered by not knowing who rena is. 

I love the alya appreciation, she’s a really really fun character especially in this, Chloe buying her an expensive camera is so funny though

Help- 

“They only ask me why I’m a boy on an all girl’s team and if I’m dating you guys.” Carapace huffed, tugging at his hood. “I’m also bi but I’m thinking of aiming for dating a dude next time I’m looking to date just so I can spite them.”

I’M OBSSESSED WITH NINO HERE HELP

Mainly because i was just thinking that “huh, i forgot that without Adrien as Cn team miraculous really seems like a girls thing

OOOO 

“They’re not my rules” 

Juleka saying this to them really forces them all to see that the partnership is unbalanced

This is like the different expectations of my divorced parents this sounds stressful to be in a team with 

Interesting to see Juleka’s rules though

I like this team conversation, I’m very curious about how much we’ll see with the five of them

The talk about dreams is fun, I am curious about what Chloe will end up wanating to do 

The whole “Oh was that an implication thing?” was cute

Juleka thinking the fact that we all end up dying is a reassuring thing is so funny help

leaving the three to a long moment without their two leaders. Or.. was it leader and her second in command.

THAT SHWTA I’M TALKING ABOUT!!!!!!!!!!! POWB YEAH UNBALANCED SYSTEM AND SHE NOTICED WOOO

It is very interesting that they never thought of it like that before though, I’m pretty sure the media had implied that Juleka was second in command, or that might have been Juleka bias working 

Cap you have no idea how insane i am for the inevitable LB and Panthera disagreement on how to run things, like I feel like there will have to be a big push because Juleka is unlikely to challenge it without them even though she feels really strongly for it

But Alya’s observation has just made me more interested

I do need it to be known that I’m not trying to vilify Marinette! I love her character in this! She’s so interesting with how she sees things and how dedicated she is, and she is a good hero!

I’m just.. Really interested to see what happens when Panthera and her are actively opposing each other

The fact that Panthera fights like she’s dancing has me feeling wild 

And actually helps me visualise how she fights a lot more, not that it was hard before but this makes a lot of details click

YAY THEY BEAT HER!!!

Ooo, Fu talk. And. wait. PROGRESS ON THE PERMANENT HEROS THING WOOHOO

We all know LB has just not asked Fu about it at all

I’ve never really stopped to wonder why

I think I assumed it was because she didn’t want to maybe go against Fu, but I don’t think that really fits…

Huh. 

More to think about, though I do apologise if you’ve made that particular motivation clear and I’ve accidentally blanked it!

Oh shit

Never mind

Were talking about the metalica moment that’s crazy insane

Never mind fade to black

God I am so curious about what she’ll be able to do with that when it is more controlled

Hang on wasn’t she not transformed? Oh no, nvm plagg can leave the ring now

the end was so cute- help not Chloe buying expensive shit for people, love that for her

I seem to have said less than usual! i'm a bit frantic rn, so sorry about that! I'm not sure how much either of my asks made sense, they really are just stream of conscious so I do apologise for anything that is confusing!

Im glad you liked the time skip- Ive heard some comments expressing their unhappiness or discomfort with it so,, yeah;;

I can't wait for panthera and ladybug's dynamic in season 3. if you guys love ladynoire toxic yuri oh boy season 3+4 will be the seasons for you guys <3

[ssreeder]

waaaAAAHHHH sreedie I’m so fucking pumped for this chapter you have no IDEA

jee out here crushing rasu’s hopes and dreams like the perfect grumpy uncle he is <3

rasu is the emotional fallout catcher and I love him for that

wheezing that katara’s most pressing concern when seeing zuko for the first time is THIS BITCH HAS HAIR??

zuko please why is your fight or flight response fucked up enough to become fight or insult the person trying to help you.

oh shit wait does zuko think katara is sokka???

yeah zuko definitely thinks she’s sokka lmao it’s giving major head injury

ugh NO just let sokka see zuko I hate it here

BUT ALSO!!! big win that iroh can tell the boys that zhao is dead at some point (it better be sooner rather than later, right sreedie??)

AT LEAST AZULA ISNT IN BA SING SE it’s the little victories lads, the itsy bitsy ones

also can sokka PLEASE tell SOMEBODY about the bending suppressants I’m like super concerned about that

aaaaaang not the yue bomb T-T

dude. the fact that aang has suffered so much loss- I can’t anymore

BATO T-T not zuko’s “glowing personality”

god I love chang he takes No shit whatsoever

I’m sorry but bato saying ara “had some issues” is such an understatement, why does this man have such a comedic thought process. he really said I do not want to touch This with a 10ft pole

LMAO pls it would be so funny if bato did end up kissing chang (especially if it’s accidental)

loving bato in his damage control era

CHANG “now that things are awkward I’m gonna go” T-T my guy said TOODLES

ah yes, return of the penis fingers trauma from the good old days <3

HES AWAKE and immediately making innuendoes

trust that jet decides to expose sokka while on his deathbed I shouldn’t have expected any less from him

AZULA

I love mai <33333333

sreedie WHO has been leaving you negative comments and WHERE can I find them (not bc I wanna defend you or anything haha not like I still care about you even though we’re divorced haha I HATE you actually)

anyways I’ve been ROBBED???!?!? wHere was my zukka reunion >:(((

sreedie it better be soon bc I’m losing my whole mind… but yes very very vibrating-out-of-my-seat about the potential of a zuko and chang reunion too :3 (if you kill chang I will throw a rock through your window and smash all your lightbulbs)

LOVE HATE YOU HEAPS <3

LEEEEEKKKKIIIIIEEEEE

the time has come I release your ask into the void and am no longer able to stare at it and giggle when I see all your silly but so satisfying words. (I’m sorry this one is so much later than the rest my life is enjoying kicking me around and I’m too tired to fight back)

Ok sooo…. I love/hate you let’s DO THIS!

I feel like Zukos hair was more important than his redemption arc so yes it must be acknowledged by everyone almost immediately haha.

I hate it here too leekie let’s move fuck the ending of this fic let’s do a new one

I think I just heard leekie is a Chang/bato shipper but it’s a trouple because lyns there so it’s a real party whoop whoop!

Zukka reunion is coming, its just probably…. Not….. next……. Chaoter………. Sorrrrrryyyy but SOON

I swear soon

Love ya

[just-before-dawn]

maybe you wouldn't have as much trouble recruiting people for your zine if you

- didn't bully

- didn't listen to rumors

- weren't transphobic

- weren't exclusionary

- didn't let people sexualise minors

try that and see how it goes

please yall i WHEEZED

delusional anon who wont show face and jumping through hoops trying to victimize and paint me as an enemy because they hate to see us win

i know this is probably bait and this person probably needs a reality check but i think anons like these are funny and think they would make me go cry but bitch what the fuck please youre messing with the wrong bitch

just because im just a new lil guy vibing in a fandom about dancing cats created by an old british dude, i aint some fucking pussy ass mf. what absolute fucking fantasy world is this anon living in LMAO. please provide picture evidence of bullying, i only fight back if people do me wrong and put words in my mouth that are absolutely untrue. and me listening to rumors? i dont give two shits unless if people give me actual evidence of what happens. listen, i dont care what the fuck a person does on the goddamn internet but because im running a zine and extremely care about the comfort of my mods and contributors, i need to be on high alert on situations. if a person comes up to me about a situation, i ask them to provide details before i go accusing shit.

what really made me GUFFAW was "werent transphobic"

BITCH.

PLEASE. LAUGHING. CLOWN MUSIC.

whos gonna tell them that im non-binary/masc-presenting.

and me excluding? who? tell me. i didnt know the phrase "anyone can join the zine!" means excluding to you. dictionaries are easy to access on the internet, babe.

and WHAT?? THE LAST STATEMENT??? WHAT WORLD LMAOOO. provide the evidence please 💕 the hypocrisy of this anon. "dont listen to rumors" *makes up statements*

listen if you wanna join my zine, then go do so. if you dont, then fucking whatever. i just want this opportunity to be out there for people who have never potentially been in a zine before and wanna create something nice. but yknow, people take this as a threat for some reason. its not hard to open a window, breathe in some fresh outside air, maybe take a walk, look at the sky, sit in a patch of grass. literally the contributor application hasnt even ended yet and this person just woke up wanting to cause problems but fails miserably.

and i swear if the anon is like "this is bullying!!" motherfucker YOU prompted it. i dont say shit about people unless if they come after me with baseless accusations.

[itsclippingbinch]

Alex somehow managed to find a trio of uninhabited beanbags tucked away in a corner. He sat down in the orange one and pulled his legs in to keep from tripping anyone who walked by. He was starting to wish he brought his language readings with him when he heard a commotion to his right.  

“Tell me where they are Matthew Montoya!” Eloise’s voice shouted from a distance.  

“Why are you being so hostile to the sound of the revolution?” Matthew's voice shouted back, slightly closer.  

“Because the revolution sounds like my little brother playing with a drum kit while reciting bootleg Edgar Allen Poe poetry!”  

Matthew just responded with a delighted cackle. Just as Alex was about to stand up and try to catch Eloise while she was close, there was suddenly someone directly to his right, trying to run through the beanbag chair he was sitting in. Of course, the laws of physics being what they were, they instead tripped and fell over it. Alex registered them falling too late to move out of the way, and they ended up landing right in his lap. 

“Shit, sorry,” the person said as the impact caused Alex to let out an involuntary groan. He almost let out another when the person’s voice registered as familiar. He hoped he was mistaken, but when the chaos of the moment subsided and Alex could clearly see who was sitting on him, it was definitely Matthew Montoya. The man himself must have been too disoriented to realize what had happened, because he continued with his apology. “Are you alright? I-”  

Matthew had been smiling, his eyes bright and unobstructed by his glasses. They weren’t even on their usual perch on top of his head. Maybe that’s why it took him so long to recognize who he fell on. Once he did, though, his smile inverted and the joy in his eyes vanished. It was probably for the best. He was really cute when he didn’t look like he wanted Alex dead, and Alex didn’t really know what to do with that. Especially when he was so close. And still in his lap.  

The two of them stared at each other for what felt like minutes. Alex in bewilderment, Matthew in contempt. Alex didn’t know how long they would have stayed like that if left to their own devices, but luckily, they were saved by a Frenchman clearing his throat.   

“You too look... comfortable,” he said. Matthew and Alex snapped their heads to the side to see Baptiste looking at them with a very amused expression.  

“You’re not funny,” Matthew seethed, quickly moving to sit up. To gain leverage he tried to push off the bag, but instead pressed his palm right into Alex’s stomach. Alex doubled over from the pain, causing his head to bang against Matthew’s nose.  

“¡Carajo!” Matthew shouted, cradling his nose instead of getting up. “Jesus Christ, what is your head made of, diamonds?” 

“Sorry,” Alex wheezed, still recovering from the accidental gut punch. “My fault.”  

“No, it was his,” Baptiste pointed out. “Get up before you break him, Matthew.”   

“You calling me fat?” 

“You making excuses because you are enjoying yourself down there?” 

“Shut up,” Matthew mumbled, making a point getting up without touching either Alex or the beanbag chair.  

“Are you having fun, Alexander?” Baptiste asked once Matthew was up. “Your flatmate almost crushing you notwithstanding.”  

“He really didn’t,” Alex said when Matthew rolled his eyes. “And I am. This party is really nice.”  

“You’re a really bad liar,” Matthew said. “If you’re bored just leave, dude.”  

“I’m not-” 

“Stop lying, you’re sitting alone in a beanbag chair that smells like stale Funyuns looking like you’re waiting for mommy to come pick you up.”  

“Be nice, Matthew,” Baptiste chided.   

“Only when he stops.” 

“I’m not bored,” Alex insisted. “I’m just...” 

“Just what, Conrad?”  

“Hey!” A fourth voice suddenly chimed in. In a blur Eloise was joining their huddle. She shoved Matthew so hard he effortlessly flew in to one of the empty beanbag chairs, landing on his side. “Where did you put The Beatles, Matthew? Where are you hiding U2?”  

“I’ll die before I let you infect my stereo with Bono.”  

“If you die tonight, it’ll be from this garbage causing leaks in your brain.” Eloise gestured to Alex. “If you were blasting this at 2 AM last weekend then this man is a saint for not smothering you in your sleep.” 

“That feels like an exaggeration.”  

“I am inclined to agree with Eloise, Matthew,” Baptiste chimed in. “This is not pleasant.” 

“It's not supposed to be pleasant! It’s visceral! It’s anger and frustration and raw human aggression!”   

“You’re saying it’s meant to illicit the discomfort it causes,” Alex guessed. 

“Obviously.”  

“Then if you judge art by how well it achieves its intended purpose, I’d say this music is very good.”  

Matthew stared at Alex with an incredulous expression. “You don’t know who Queen is,” he said slowly, “and yet you get metal more than they do?"

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[stylesparker]

I Know That Voice

PAIRING: TASM!Peter Parker x Reader

WORD COUNT: 2k

CONTENT: some douchebag and a spider, comedy and major fluff

NOTES: while I was trying to think of ideas I thought, what if peter’s best friend just wasn’t a total idiot and actually recognized his voice when they met spider-man? what would that be like? so this is what came out of it. I thought it was really funny, hope you enjoy! last fic of 2021 :)

“who knows maybe he’s like, a really ugly dude with a receding hairline or something-”

peter bursts out laughing, shaking so hard he clutches his hand to his chest.

“you seriously believe that’s what spider-man looks like?” he wheezes.

“no- no! I didn’t say that’s what I think he looks like, I just said that could be a possibility!” you laugh. 

an hour ago when you came over to peter’s house to study, you had every intention to get straight down to business and start the project you two have together that’s due in a week from now. which was also assigned a week ago. doing projects with your best friend are always difficult, but you guys always manage to get a good grade in the end, since you are the two smartest in the grade, maybe aside from your other friend gwen. but when you mentioned to peter that you were 99% sure spider-man waved at you yesterday, it’s been a whole discussion on what you think he looks like. 

“who knows! he could also have no hair, or really bleached hair! or maybe he dresses like a frat boy everyday- or he is a frat boy! just because he’s a hero doesn’t mean he automatically has great fashion sense-” you ramble. 

peter looks at you fondly, “I think this is the best conversation we’ve had yet. I can’t wait until-” his eyes widen just a bit, looking like he got caught with something. but then he smiles, and relaxes a bit. unbeknownst to you, he’s actually shocked you haven’t figured out he’s spider-man, because you are practically an FBI agent when it comes to everything, so he’s just waiting for the day you scream at him when you find out. but he’s really loves watching you try to guess, it’s quite fun. “honestly, I can’t wait until the day you figure out he’s like a really handsome dude, because then you’ll have to apologize for ever thinking he’s a really ugly dude-”

“peter, I’m good, but I’m not that good. if spider-man doesn’t want us to know who he is, we’ll never know and we just have to respect that. I don’t know how I’d figure it out, but if I ever did, I’d keep his secret, though I would tell everyone he’s really ugly for fun,” you laugh again, taking a hair clip and pulling your hair back to fix it from when it fell out. while you’re distracted, peter takes a good look at you. he knows you wouldn’t tell anyone, it’s not the reason he hasn’t told you. if he were to tell anyone you’d immediately be the first. the only thing is that you’d be in a hell of a lot more danger if you knew, and he couldn’t ever risk anything happening to you. you guys have been best friends since you were ten years old, he couldn’t ever lose you like that. if it were up to him, you would have been his a long time ago, but spider-man doesn’t really get those opportunities.

you bite the end of your pencil and look at the worksheets you spread out over his bed, trying to focus on one part instead of the whole. you blow a fallen piece of hair out of your face, pushing it behind your ear. 

do you know how pretty you are? he wonders. at this moment, you look up, noticing him gazing at you. dropping your pencil, you touch your face.

“what, do I have something on my face?” you ask. he blushes, realizing he got caught.

“n-no.. no! no you don’t, I’m uh... gonna- you know,” he immediately busies himself with his part of the work, very clearly avoiding your eyes again. you smile to yourself, relishing the fact you made him blush. even though it would really suck throwing a long time friendship down the drain if you broke up, it doesn’t stop you from letting your mind wander to the fact of what it would be like if you ever indulged in your desires with peter. you tear your gaze away from, deciding to get to work yourself.

... 

not even a full hour later, peter’s phone buzzes and you look over at him at the desk. he pulls it out and takes a look at it. 

“shit- uh, I’m really sorry but I gotta go-” he rushes around the room, picking up his bag throwing it over his shoulder, and hopping around to get his shoes on. “I’ll call you later Y/N, bye!”

“uh, okay? bye-” he kisses your forehead messily and bolts out the door. you sit on his bed, reeling it in that he just kissed you. not that you guys have never shared forehead or cheek kisses before, just that, it seemed so natural and your ever growing crush on him just expanded ten fold. you try not to think about it too much as you gather your stuff up to leave. aunt may wouldn’t be here for another few hours so there was no point in staying. it’s about 5 o’clock, so you thought you’d stop by the library to trade in a few books and get a little bit of your other homework done. there was no point in going straight home since an empty house is always boring, and your own aunt works with aunt may so she wouldn’t be back either.

you hum to yourself as you walk to the library, and when you get there, you spend a couple hours getting your work done. having plugged in your headphones you listen to your music as you do your homework. there aren’t many people in there, just frankie, the sweet old lady who works at the front desk, a couple sitting in the corner reading books, and a guy behind one of the bookshelves about ten feet away from you. so it was a relatively calm night. as you gather up your stuff to leave, you notice the guy from behind the bookshelf hadn’t moved the whole time you were here. hadn’t got anything, hadn’t done anything, just stood there. you try not to panic, not to go straight to the worst conclusion. peter always says you overthink everything and to try and keep yourself calm when you think your spiraling, so you take a deep breath and listen to the peter in your head. 

shut up, stop thinking. 

you throw your backpack over you shoulder and say bye to frankie, leaving the library without another second thought. you look at your watch and it’s a little after eight. later than you expected, but you try to head home as fast as you can. after you walked about a block, you notice the guy from the library is trailing you a bit away behind you. 

shit, I was right you think.

you’re still at least ten minutes away from your apartment, so you walk even faster, clutching the straps of your backpack in tight fists. trying not to look behind you too often to make him aware you know of him, you just speed walk down the path, hoping this night doesn’t take a turn for the worst. when you’re about five minutes away, you take a small peek and don’t see him. 

maybe he got bored and left?

a sharp yank on your backpack from your right has you spinning your head in that direction. the same guy pulls you into the dark alley, pulling the backpack off you and pinning you against the cold brick wall. 

“HELP! HELP-” you barely get to scream another word out before he’s smacking his hand over your mouth, keeping you quiet as your pinned down. he’s way bigger than you and huge arms that you didn’t notice before. his other hand has a sharp grip on your arm, making you think you’re probably gonna have a bruise. 

“shut up, girl, or this could get a lot worse. now just keep quiet-”

“hey man, why don’t you pick on someone your own size, yeah?” 

suddenly, a sticky web attaches itself to the guys shirt and yanks him away from you, tearing his tight grip off your arm. you take a shaky breath as you watch spider-man web him to the opposite wall.

“what the f-” the guy doesn’t get to finish as a web gets shot right over his mouth to shut him up. spider-man turns around and looks at you, quiet for a moment before realizing he should probably say something.

“you okay miss-” his eyes scan over you, covering up his obvious look with a cough and a short laugh. “you alright-”

as he takes another step towards you, you step back, throwing a hand up to separate you. he stops, confused. 

“it’s okay.. I’m not gonna hurt you-” 

I know that voice.

“you’ve got to be shitting me, par-” in two seconds flat your soaring through the air, a tight arm around your waist. 

“OH MY GOD-” you scream, chancing a look down, seeing that your probably like a hundred feet in the air. you tighten your arms around his head, throwing you head in the the crook of his neck. 

“just hang on-” he says.

“PETER, WHAT-”

“shhh, don’t talk right now.”

“WHA- DON’T TALK? YOU’RE SPIDER-MAN PETE-”

“can you shut up for second?”

“NO- AHHH-” your screaming cuts off as you two land on the top of some building, could be your building for all you know. he softens his grip and you push away from him. he laughs, taking a good look at you with your hair all over the place and a wild look in your eye. you fix it real quick and turn back to him, watching him tear the mask from his head to see those chocolate brown curls you love so much. you open your mouth, but he rushes forward and puts a finger over your mouth. 

“okay, just let me explain-”

“do you have ANY idea how much I’m freaking out right now-”

“just calm down-”

“you’re out here every night kicking villain ass and you tell ME to be careful-”

“SHHHH-”

“AND YOU’RE DOING IT IN A SPANDEX SUIT-”

“NOT SO LOUD-”

“no, you LET go of me right this instant-” he grabs your face and pulls you towards him, smashing his lips onto yours, silencing you with a kiss. his hands stay put on your face as your eyes stay wide in shock, taking a second to actually realize that peter is kissing you right now and holy shit this is nice-

he pulls back far too soon, but keeps his hands rested on your face. your hands came up and held his wrists without you even noticing you did that, and you stare at him as he looks at you with his own wild look. you’re both breathing heavily as you both just stand there holding each other, realizing what he just did. 

“you kissed me...” you let out a breath, sounding much calmer than you felt.

“I did, yes,” he nods his head, “did you like it?” 

“you little shit...” you laugh and pull his head back to your face as you kiss him this time, now catching him off guard as he takes in the fact holy shit you reciprocate his feelings-

you and peter stand on that rooftop for what felt like hours, kissing each other after finally waiting so long.

“so what do you think? am I an ugly dude with a receding hairline?” he asks. you drop your head to his chest laughing.

“I’m gonna tell everyone spider-man is SO ugly-”

“oh so that means you think I’m handsome right? you said you’d say that for fun-”

“god you’re annoying parker.”

after a while, he actually does stop and ask you if you’re alright after remembering what he just saved you from, taking notice of the bruise on your arm, brushing over it softly, but you quickly say that you’re fine and that he needs to start talking right now or you’re gonna throw him in a ditch somewhere for not telling you that he’s spider-man. 

“I love you, but you know I will kill you-”

“yeah, yeah, now c’mere and let me kiss you.”

[silentmoths]

soooo, genshin men with an s/o who has that intense. blanked face and unblinking serial killer stare but in actuality they're actually a nice and dare i say funny person on the inside who's VERY socially awkward and quiet. the embodiment of "i want to friend but i don't know how to friend pls help".

bonus points if they're smol because that would make it even funnier. like you're afraid of this tiny ass gremlin? what's up with OH MY GOD WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT LOOK ON YOUR FACE-

bonus BONUS points if they're touch starved because the pandemic fucked us up and we all need a hug.

how dare you know me so well that I couldn't resist, because I too am a resting blank face, touch starved bitch lmao. lessgo~

Ft: Diluc, Zhongli and Childe (I would have done more but it's been a very long day)

I may have also had a fair bit to drink at the work party so forgive any horrible spelling mistakes screams

Diluc

¤ He found your lack of expression somewhat refreshing actually, it meant that when you did actually crack a smile, it was genuine, and there was always a great pride swelling in his chest whenever he manages it.

¤ He doesn't mind that you're not social, heck, neither is he, two birds of a feather, with equally terrible, sometimes dry humor.

¤ your similar sense of humor actually came as quite a shock, the first time you cracked a joke, he very nearly missed it, until he did a double take, replaying what you'd just said in your head and ends up half leaning on the counter trying not to wheeze.

¤ Not to mention, your thousand-yard stare could dissuade just about anyone, and he was always greatful that you were able to pick up on when Diluc wanted someone to leave him alone, and would activate said stare.

¤ However his favorite moments are always those in private, after a long day's work, his favorite thing was you pushing your face into his chest, whether it be when you're lying in bed together, or if he's stuck staying up late in his office looking over documents; you'd either lay beside him, or he'd shift his chair out just a little to make space for you to clamber into his lap and rest your chin on his shoulder, either way it always ended with you dozing happily with one of his arms wrapped around you.

Zhongli

¤ He won't lie to himself, at first he thought your stare was somewhat unnerving, even to his 6000 year old ass, but the longer he'd spent around you, the more endearing he found it.

¤ this dude is the smooth motherfucker who can tell your mood simply from the way you stare, the subtle crease of your brow or the faintest squint, to anyone else you're fucking horrifying sometimes, but he could take one look and discern that no, you were not angry, you were hungry and wanted a hug.

¤ In a way, he's somewhat glad for it. Being able to understand your needs likely before even you realised you needed them was a blessing, a silent communication that mean't he could be a steadfast and attentive partner, even if at times you told him it was eerie how easily he could discern your face.

¤ He would also never admit it to anyone but you, but your deadpan delivery of the occasional joke you did crack was amazing. Especially whenever you did it near Hu-Tao, the directors confused and somewhat shocked face always filled the archon with an unspeakable sense of satisfaction

¤ It came as a shock when he realised just how much affection you craved, if it wasn't for busy work schedules between you both, he's sure you'd spend the entire day clinging onto him, which he certainly wouldn't mind...especially when he got to watch your expression melt into something truly content, yes that was definitely his favorite part.

Childe

¤ This idiot LOVES the face honestly. Relishes it, in some aspects he makes it his life's damn goal to try and make you crack a smile wiht every interaction, but he feels like it's a hard won battle when he gets you to wheeze with laughter.

¤ He also likes to take you along with him on 'debt collections' because if a fatui harbinger wasnt scary enough, the bitch behind him staring at them with death in their eyes sure fuckn was.

¤ He know's it's not your favorite thing to do, but on particular collections where the bank has specified no killing, he really did appreciate having you there.

¤ and he pays back in your favorite ways; fingers running softly through your hair, a hand resting on your waist, effectionate nuzzles into your skin, all the good shit.

¤ one of his favorite passtimes is staring contests, mostly unknowing staring contests. however these almost always end with one of you breaking and snickering or wheezing. honestly you're both hopeless.

[noteguk]

bad behavior | jjk | m

This is in the same universe as “bad influence.” It can, however, be read as a stand-alone. 

— summary; in which staying late to volunteer at a self-help meeting was the best decision you made in a while. 

— contents and warnings; smut, the endless adventures of badboy!jk x goodgirl!reader, public sex (in a church…), dirty talk, fingering, degradation (name calling) but also praise, unprotected sex, clothed sex, creampie, cum play, there is a window and also reflections, rough sex, cockwarming, jk being a lil shit because that’s his main personality trait, jk smokes (only mentioned), enemies to fuckbuddies: dawn of the first day 

— words; 8.2k

— author’s note; for the anon that asked how their first time was like ;) join me as we explore the lore of this godforsaken couple 

It was your mother’s idea for you to find a new place to volunteer. According to her, it had been a long time since you experienced “the invigorating energy of community work” — last time was when you were trying to level up your college application — and it could really “soothe your anxious soul” during the trying times of college finals. Apparently one tutoring program and two research projects weren’t enough to distract you, but you could see where she was coming from. 

In the end, you accepted. The old places you used to volunteer in had either shut off their programs or were just too far away from college for you to consider. At first, you decided to follow your mother’s suggestion and tried to work with children — “small miracles”, as she called them — in a local daycare. Which ended up being a terrible idea. 

You liked giving back to the community, you really did, but it wasn’t long until you realized that working with infants hasn’t been your wisest decision, and that children weren’t miracles at all. You got tired of going home covered in paint and with pieces of playdough entangled in your hair, and that was when you weren’t unlucky enough to get hit with other, less clean fluids. 

So you eventually gave up — both on the daycare and on the faint idea of one day going into pediatrics — and searched for a new place. After having to yell your way through retirement homes, and getting fed up with washing people’s sidewalks, you finally settled in a program that was flexible and light enough for your intense college hours: preparing (and then later cleaning up) a room that was reserved in a local church for weekly meetings. 

The entire ordeal took about two to three hours off your day, and more than half of it was spent as free time: waiting for the meeting to end, cramming piles of information in a small room next door. You didn’t really know what the meetings were about since they changed practically every month — they were, at first, a support group for teenage mothers, then it became an AA meeting, then a group for drug users trying to quit. Lately, you were starting to think that the church just gave away the room for whoever had the money to rent it, so it wasn’t a surprise when it was reserved for a motivational speaker to give confidence lessons. 

You had researched the guy, some old dude with an unpronounceable name and a sketchy background, and found exactly the type of person you had expected. Yes, you were in the house of Christ, but you were still being heavily judgmental of the fact that he was giving those talks when he had no qualifications whatsoever, and was probably making bank off all the self-help books he regurgitated at least twice a year to prey on vulnerable people. You did share your worries with the administrative office of the church, but they ultimately fell on deaf ears, and you gave up on the idea of kicking his ass out of the holy grounds anytime soon. 

It was after one of those pseudo-motivational talks that you walked into the empty room, ready to clean everything up before rushing back to your place, where your roommate had promised to greet you with some wonderful takeout. The chairs were still placed in a circle on the center of the room, where they had been since forever, and you made sure to align them perfectly before you moved on to the litter that had been thrown around the place. 

One good thing about those self-help meetings was that they were a lot cleaner than a lot of other attendees, so the “picking up the trash until your back started to hurt” part passed by surprisingly fast. You had just moved on to the snack table, analyzing what you could still save, when your soul almost left your body. 

“Hey, you,” you heard a known voice behind you. “What are you doing in here?”

You swiftly turned around, heart thumping violently against your ribcage. You didn’t know how you hadn’t let out the biggest, most blood-curdling scream ever, but that was just the first of many miracles of the night. “Jesus Christ,” you wheezed out, taking one hand to your chest. “You shouldn’t sneak up on people like this.” You swallowed dry, some part of your brain recalling that he had asked you a question. “And I’m volunteering here.” 

“I didn’t sneak up on you, you’re just jumpy.” Jungkook scoffed, leaning against the doorframe with that stupid playful smirk curling up on his lips. You didn’t know they allowed demons inside the church. “And of course you are.” He rolled his eyes. 

Maybe a few months back, his mocking tone would’ve stung a bit more. However, you had been tutoring Jungkook for about three months then, suffering through endless sessions of his whining and complaining, and you’ve grown used to his passive-aggressive antics already. You learned that Jungkook was a shark seeking for blood, waiting for any crack that would allow him to jump into a perverse little joke — about how you behaved, your priorities, or even the color of your highlighter. You, of course, always stood your ground and threw his comments right back at him — which was his initial plan, as you’ve come to realize. Jungkook enjoyed playfully arguing with you, and you thought that it was another level of strangeness and masochism you simply didn’t have time to dissect. 

Still, Jungkook (shockingly) wasn’t the terrible person you once thought he was. Every once in a while — when he was trying to talk you out of teaching him — the conversations you two would have were actually mostly pleasant, and he wasn’t awful to hang around when he dropped the whole badass persona to act like a real human being. You would even dare to say that Jungkook could be actually funny at times, and not in the bitter, sarcastic way he usually was. Sometimes, you dared to think, he could actually be reasonably nice. And also kind of cute. Even hot. 

But you would never actually admit any of that out loud. Or even to yourself, really. 

“And you?” You asked, turning back around to face the table full of half-eaten food. That looked like a battlefield, and you could already tell that there were only a few survivors left standing. “What are you doing here? Repenting?” 

Jungkook chuckled dryly. “You wish. My parents want me to quit smoking,” he said. You could not see him, but you could hear him walking closer to you as you fumbled with the large Tupperware. “We settled on this crap instead of a forced intervention.” 

You scoffed. Most of the food before you was unsalvageable — some of the cupcakes had been bitten once and then placed back, and you wondered how someone like that could function in society. “You don’t seem very motivated to quit,” you mumbled. 

Jungkook clicked his tongue. “I don’t really care.” 

His voice was much closer to you, and you felt the air leaving your lungs for a pitiful instant. You convinced yourself you had only gotten scared again. “You should care about the growing possibility of lung cancer.” 

He shrugged. “Maybe. But it’s not really on the top of my list of priorities at the moment.” 

“And what is?” You asked. 

“Amongst other things…” he trailed off and, suddenly, he was standing besides you, pointing at the chaotic pile of sweets. “I actually came back to grab another one of those cupcakes. The chocolate ones are great.” 

You didn’t know why, but his comment broke the odd tension that you didn’t even know that was there, clicking you back into your previous mentality — the one that you just wanted to finish cleaning up so you could leave soon. “All yours,” you told him, “grab as many as you want.” 

Jungkook hummed in satisfaction, reaching out to grab one special brown cupcake — an untouched one, thankfully. “I love when you talk dirty.” He almost moaned before shoving the cupcake inside his mouth, taking a huge bite off it. Dramatically, Jungkook rolled his eyes and sighed in delight. “These are fucking great.” 

You chuckled, glancing at his direction. Jungkook was dressed in all black, like he usually was, and you were starting to recognize a newfound admiration towards his constant use of leather jackets. What? He looked good. “I’m glad the self-help sessions are paying off,” you commented, swiftly placing the cupcakes inside the transparent container. 

Jungkook was paying attention to your actions now, like he noticed you were there working for the first time. “What are you doing with the rest?”

“The church will probably donate it, give it to the homeless or something.” You shrugged. “Or they’ll eat it, I don’t know. I just clean up the place and leave.” 

Jungkook laughed at that, taking another monstrous bite from his cupcake and throwing himself on one of the nearby chairs. Your eye twitched a little at the thought that he had ruined your perfect circle, but you’d have to fix that on your way out. “Sounds absurdly boring,” he sang. “And they’re not even paying you.” 

You sighed. “After all the places I’ve volunteered in, boring is a blessing,” you told him. You had just placed five hot dogs in the container, and you were starting to wonder if it would be a good idea to feed people in need with those suspicious sausages. “But, yeah, you probably don’t care about any of that.” 

“You don’t know what I care about,” Jungkook said matter-of-factly. You didn’t know if he was trying to tease you, but his voice came out so soft and monotone that you couldn’t really be mad about it. It was true, after all: you didn’t actually know what he cared about. Sometimes you thought that he could read you better than you could read him. “Want me to stay here with you? This place is probably empty already.”

You could not hold back your laugh at that, turning around so you could look at him. “Are you offering to be my bodyguard? In a church?” 

Jungkook pouted. There was a thin line of chocolate on the side of his lips, which he quickly licked clean. “I’m trying to be nice.”

You giggled, turning back towards the disgusting food. The rest was mostly trash, but you were happy enough with the amount you had managed to find in a good state. “That’s new.” 

“What’s that supposed to mean?” He asked. “I’m always nice.”

“Always is a strong word.” You smiled, closing the lid of the Tupperware. You had managed to fill three small containers with the leftovers and, honestly, that was a big victory. “But you can stay or you can leave, I don’t mind. I’m almost done anyways.” 

He frowned. “Is that your answer?” 

You turned around. “What? You want me to beg for your company?” You smiled. “You’re mistaken if you think I’d ever do that.”

“I’m staying.” Jungkook crumpled up the piece of cupcake wrapping and threw it in the trash can besides your body. He watched you for a moment as you started to throw the leftovers away, your back turned to him and a distracted look on your face. When he broke the silence again, you were throwing the last piece of bread in the bin. “Why are you volunteering?” 

“Because I like giving back to the community.” 

Jungkook sneered at your words. “Seriously now. Don’t lie, we’re in a church.” 

“I do, actually,” you stood your ground. There was a vague sound of crickets coming from the half-open window and the low buzzing of the fluorescent lights above you, but, other than that, the city was covered in absolute silence. Perhaps that was why you felt so at peace. “But my mom told me it would be a good thing to keep myself relaxed. You know, take my mind off college stuff.” 

He hummed, and you heard him getting up from the chair. “You always do what your mom tells you?” 

You met his gaze. “Didn’t your parents make you come here?”

He smiled. “Not the point.” 

Before you could hold yourself back, your lips were curling up. Again: Jungkook wasn’t absolutely awful to be around when he actually acted like a human being. “When she says something I agree with, yes,” you told him. “My ego isn’t bruised when it comes to following someone’s idea.” 

He raised his eyebrows. “You’re saying that mine is?”

“I didn’t say that.” You smirked and turned back to the table. You started piling up the used plastic cups, already eyeing all the used plates, forks and knives that you’d have to throw away. The daycare had better eating manners than that. “Thought we were talking about me.” 

“We were,” Jungkook agreed. One of his inked hands moved to the table, and you were about to tell him that he could eat more of the cupcakes when you realized that he had started to reach for the discardable plates, throwing them away. You really didn’t think he’d help you. “Finals are coming up, though, and you care about that shit. Shouldn’t you be using this time to study or something?”

“I study while you’re out here listening to becoming your real self or, I don’t know... waking up the giant within,” you said. “I’m fine, don’t worry about it.” 

He hummed, his nose cringing up at the disgusting remains of food that stuck to the plastic forks. Jungkook seriously didn’t know how you could do that for fun. “You know there are better ways to relax than cleaning up a dusty room, right?” 

“Probably,” you agreed. The cups were already in the trash, alongside with the plates, and there were only a few crumpled up napkins to get rid of before you tasted the sweet nectar of freedom. “But here I am. That’s what I chose for myself.” 

“Literally any other option would’ve been better,” Jungkook pressed on. “Isn’t that obnoxious friend of yours in cheer or something?” 

“Who? Jisoo?” You smiled at him. No one had ever called her obnoxious, but you couldn’t say that the title didn’t fit. Jisoo could be really… intense when it came to standing up for what she believed in. “She is. She invited me to join her already, if that’s what you’re gonna ask, but it’s not really my thing.” 

“It’s a shame,” he mumbled, leaning against the table. It was a beautiful miracle how clean that room had become just by getting rid of the piles of gross food, and you had proudly thrown the last piece of paper inside the trash bin when Jungkook spoke up again. “You’d look really hot in that outfit.” 

You stopped in your tracks, taking a second to digest the claim he had so mindlessly thrown your way. Just like all-things-Jungkook, a pleasant conversation could not last long, so you weren’t even surprised that he managed to ruin that talk with such a fuckboy-esque comment. 

Also like all-things-Jungkook, he managed to awaken a reaction out of you that you didn’t even know could be there. With a faint heat in your cheeks and a frown blossoming amongst your features, you actually felt a little bit of... satisfaction with the fact that he thought that you’d look hot in that skimpy outfit. At the same time, you wanted to slap yourself for falling into his charms so easily. 

In that conflicting turmoil of emotions, all you could say was a monotone, “You cannot be serious right now.”

Even if you kind of wanted him to be serious. 

“I’m being dead serious,” Jungkook didn’t back down, much to the elation of your ego. You felt like a schoolgirl being recognized by her crush, and the idea alone made your stomach curl onto itself. What the hell were you even thinking about? Yeah, Jungkook was pretty hot, but he was also kind of a douche and you didn’t want to get involved with that mess of a person. Or at least that was what you were trying to convince yourself of. “I mean…” he continued, “you’re even rocking this knee-level dress right now, can’t even imagine how you’d look if—“ 

“You can shut up now, Jungkook, thanks,” you interrupted him. Because you didn’t know how to act when he was so blatantly flirting with you, you switched back to the same passive-aggressive behavior that you had given him for the past three months. Call it self-preservation, call it panic, but your mind simply didn’t know where to go from there. “And I’m also done here, so you can skidaddle back to whatever swamp you came out of.” 

“Awn, don’t be mean, princess.” He pouted. Jungkook was a master at getting you worked up, and you had just given that to him on a silver platter. Maybe if you had mock-flirted back, he would’ve baked away. You would never know. “I was just fucking with you, you’re too easy to tease.” 

You pressed your lips together, hip touching the corner of the now empty table. “You were pretty much harassing me,” you said playfully. 

“I was not.” Jungkook smirked, shoving his hands inside the pockets of his pants. When had the two of you gotten so close? There was barely any space between your chests. “But it’s okay, I’m not gonna compliment you anymore, don’t worry. You don’t have to be so defensive.” 

“I’m not being defensive,” you said, defensive. 

“What, is it the church setting?” He raised his eyebrows, taking a look around. “Is it making you uncomfortable?” 

“No,” you answered, crossing your arms before your chest. Jungkook followed the movement and his gaze got stuck on the shape of your breasts for a second too long, making a newfound wave of heat rise up to your cheeks. “Not as much as you’re trying to make me uncomfortable right now.” 

He chuckled. “You do look cute when you’re shy,” Jungkook teased, taking a step towards you, and you took another one back, pretending you were just going to lean against the table. You sat on it in a weird diagonal position, with one leg still on the ground and the other dangling over the edge. Jungkook was so close that, when he spoke again, voice just above a whisper, you could feel his breath on your skin. “If you don’t want me here, just ask me to go and I’ll go.” 

You opened your mouth to respond, but no words came out. The atmosphere was filled with electricity, your body drowning in the warmth of his presence, the sharp seriousness in his dark eyes, and you could not bring yourself to say anything. Did you want him to leave? 

No, you realized in a rush of adrenaline, you didn’t want him to leave at all. 

Jungkook raised one of his eyebrows. “Hm? Nothing?” He smirked, placing himself between your legs. Every nerve of your body was screaming for you to touch him, to just wrap his mouth with yours, and you simply could not respond to any of its commands. “You’re full of surprises.” 

You found your voice at that comment, heart hammering against your chest. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“You’re a smart girl, you can figure it out.” Jungkook placed one strand of your hair behind your ear, his gaze flickering down to your chest. From where he stood, he could see the beautiful mounds of your breasts peeking under the fabric, licking his lips at the sight. “Can I at least say that I like your dress?” 

Jungkook’s palm slithered up your knee before you could even react, moving towards your inner thigh and raising your dress along with it. His touch was electrifying, and you found yourself craving more of it, a sigh caught on your throat at the tenderness of his hot skin. 

“Something tells me that your compliment isn’t so innocent,” you told him, leaning your head back slightly so you could hold his gaze. “Aren’t you gonna complete that and say that I would look better without it?”

Jungkook chuckled. “The idea is compelling, I’ll admit it,” he said, rubbing soft circles on your skin. His other hand slithered around your waist, pulling you closer to him. “But don’t need to take it off to fuck you.” 

Your eyes grew wide at that, brain short-circuiting. You frankly couldn’t believe that was happening — the fact that Jungkook was so shamelessly trying (and honestly succeeding) to initiate sex with you. In a fucking church too, of all places. “What- what did you say?”

“You heard what I said.” His stare didn’t falter. Jungkook was looking at you like he could eat you whole, and you seriously wouldn’t mind if he tried to. You'd deal with the social and psychological implications of that another time. “Just tell me to stop and I’ll do it, princess. No hard feelings, promise.” 

This time, you spoke out and the firmness and certainty in your voice surprised even yourself. “I don’t want you to stop.” 

“No?” His voice sounded like honey, so deep and melodic even through the thick layers of his sarcasm. You had never heard him get so serious, so focused, and the thought that it was all for you was igniting a fire inside your guts. “You wanna get fucked in a church?” 

You bit your lip, blinking up at him. The point was: you wanted Jungkook, of all people, to fuck you. The fact that it was in a church was just the cherry on top, and you didn’t care about it as much as you should — your mom would be weeping blood if she knew what was going on, but you weren’t planning on telling anything to anybody. “And what if I do?” You asked back teasingly. 

Jungkook smiled, knocking the breath right out of you. You could only hope that you didn’t look as horny as you felt, because your pride was still on the line. “Told you that you were full of surprises.” He pushed one of your legs open, making you lose your support on the floor. Now, both of your feet were dangling off the edge, body trapped between his strong arms and thighs on either side of him. “Are you a virgin, baby?”

You shook your head, and your voice reached you a bit later. “No.”

“Naughty,” Jungkook said, leaning in. He stared at you like a lion stalking its prey, his gaze lingering on your parted lips before, at last, he tilted his head to the side, deciding to move towards your neck instead. “But if you have the taste I think you do, you probably had some lame missionary sex with some goodie-two shoes.” 

When he started kissing your neck, you almost forgot to give him a response. You had to bite your lip to suppress a moan, instead producing a low, shaky sigh. “And if I did? What’s the problem with some lame missionary sex?” 

“No need to get mad, I’m on your side here,” Jungkook said, one of his hands navigating up your waist, between the valley of your breasts, before grabbing your boob. That time, you couldn’t hold back the whimper that escaped you. “Did he make you cum?” 

“Sometimes,” you said, slightly flustered. You didn’t think you’d be discussing your sexual history with Jungkook, but, well, there you were. “He was alright.” 

“Only sometimes?” Jungkook chuckled, the vibrations of his deep timbre vibrating through the sensitive skin of your neck, his thumb grazing your nipple. The heat between your legs only grew, your entire body practically begging to feel more of him. “That’s a shame, I could do better.” 

You rolled your eyes. “Don’t start getting cocky.”

“I never stopped being cocky,” he responded without hesitation. Well, he was right. “And I do have a good track record.” 

“Doubt it,” you said, the ghost of a smile lingering on your lips. You knew that you were playing a dangerous game, pressing right at the weak spots of his inflated ego to see how he would react. Perhaps you’d be luckier trying to poke a bear with a short stick. “You wouldn’t know the difference between a real and fake orgasm even if it hit you in the face.” 

Jungkook leaned back and looked at you for an instant. You knew he had caught onto your challenge straight away. He liked it as much as you did, there was no doubt about that. “Let’s see, shall we?” he asked. There was no denying the devilish aura that was all around him now, suffocating you with its tempting heat. “How long do we have?”

“I’m locking up the room tonight,” you said, watching as his eyes sparked with an emotion you could not decipher. “But I wanna get home before ten. Have homework.” 

You could see him fighting against the natural urge to ridicule you for saying something like that at such an odd time, but, at the end, he managed to avoid it. “More than enough time.” Jungkook placed one hand on the back of your neck, gaze darting hungrily toward your lips. “Come here.”

And then his mouth was on yours, and everything else was white noise. Jungkook kissed you much slower than you had anticipated, taking his sweet time caressing your mouth with his; hands exploring the curves of your body and teasing their way underneath your dress. He sighed heavily against your mouth when you wrapped your arms around his shoulders, pulling him closer and deepening the kiss, his soft tongue poking out and entering your mouth perfectly. Jungkook was a good kisser, you had to admit it, and he got your knees weak sooner than you’d like. 

His body was hot and firm against yours and you could feel the outline of his abs underneath your fingers as you trailed your hands down his torso; his quick heartbeat drumming on your palms. Jungkook’s breathing got heavier as you hooked your fingers on the hem of his pants and tugged him toward you. Instantly you noticed the outline of his hard cock against your inner thigh. 

Then, something switched. Just as you had reached out to touch his hardness, squeezing it lightly underneath your fingers, Jungkook groaned against your mouth and bit down on your lip. You had barely any time to react before he was pulling away from the kiss, gaze darkening. 

“Such a tease,” he mumbled hoarsely, his breath hitting your mouth in soft waves. His hand was hovering over your heat, his middle finger pressing down on your sensitive nub, making you whimper. “You don’t know what you do to me.” 

Jungkook was much quicker than your thoughts and, within a second, the motion of your panties being pushed aside made you fumble closer to him; your hands holding tightly onto his shoulders when he finally decided to touch you. 

“Fuck,” he groaned next to your ear, making your mind go blank for a split second. The teasing motions of his digits brushing your entrance were enough to make you whimper, hips thrusting forward in a failed attempt to make him move further. “Look at this, you’re soaking my fingers. Wanna get fucked that bad?”

But he didn’t let you respond. The sudden intrusion of two fingers inside your pussy made your back arch, nails digging in the leather of his jacket as Jungkook opened you up. “I—” you tried to speak, but it was hard to think when he started pumping his fingers in and out of you. The sounds of your wetness were a filthy symphony filling the quiet atmosphere. “Jungkook, what—” 

“God, that’s so tight,” he groaned, speaking through clenched teeth. His voice was enough to shut you up at the spot, a frail moan dripping from your lips. “Relax, baby, you’re too tense. Let me take care of you, alright?” 

You nodded, eyes drifting shut as he continued to pump his fingers in and out of you. You hated to admit it, but Jungkook was already winning against your ex by a long shot: the way his digits brushed inside you, gradually moving apart to stretch you, got you searching — begging — for more. You were sure you could cum around his fingers and, when he curled them up and they dragged against your sweet spot, the idea became a lot more palpable. 

“Jungkook, you’re taking too long, I’m gonna cum like this,” you complained, chest rising and falling under the waves of your upcoming orgasm. You could feel it building up in your stomach, ready to snap, and you didn’t want it to happen around his fingers. “I wanna feel you.” 

Jungkook breathed out at your needy request, placing a kiss against your jaw. “I’m just getting you ready for my cock, baby,” he said. A loud moan dripped from you when he unceremoniously added a third finger, your legs trembling on either side of his body. “I don’t know if you can take it.”

You scoffed. “Don’t flatter yourself,” you said, only half aware of the fact that your voice sounded more like a whimper than a serious comment. “I can.” 

He smirked wickedly. You really were pushing his buttons. “We’ll see about that,” Jungkook responded. 

Within a second, right as your orgasm was about to wash over you, he removed his fingers from your pussy. The frustrated moan you let out was quickly swollen by him, his mouth rogue against yours and the sweetness of his tongue intoxicating you — probably those stupid cupcakes, you thought. 

“Turn around for me,” he asked. 

You quickly did as he requested, putting your feet on the ground before turning your back to him, hands leaning on the table. Jungkook placed one hand on the curve of your spine, pushing you down until you had your chest against the surface, ass perked up and pussy in full display for him. There was a gush of cold air against your flesh when he pulled up the fabric of your dress and tossed it over your waist, exposing your lower body for him.

The boy hummed at the sight, one of his legs kicking your feet apart so he could position himself in the middle of your thighs. “You’re pretty all around,” Jungkook commented, one of his palms grazing your asscheek before grabbing it. His motion was harsh, needy; earning a whimper from you. “Knew you would be.” 

Through the dense clouds of your desire, there was still some part of you that managed to make fun of that situation. “You spend your free time thinking about my ass?”

“Won’t answer until I have a lawyer present,” he joked. 

You felt his fingers hooking around the fabric of your panties, pushing it further to the side so you had your cunt fully exposed for him to see. The drumming of your heartbeat almost drowned out the low groan he produced at the sight of your flushed heat. 

“Princess, your pussy is dripping so much…” Jungkook trailed off, one of his fingers tracing a line between your lips. He felt the urge to eat you out, to lick you completely clean and make you cum on his tongue, but he decided that would have to wait for a different time. “Is this all for me?” 

“Yeah, all for you,” you said, weak. There was a thundering exasperation building up inside you, motivated from your denied orgasm and from the way that Jungkook was taking his sweet time. 

“Good girl,” he mumbled and your chest was filled with pride. “Can’t wait to fuck it.” 

“Then don’t wait,” you practically begged. “Just rush.”

He removed his finger from your heat. “Shh… be patient,” Jungkook told you and you swore you could practically hear the smile in his voice. You could hear him shuffling behind you, the sound of his zipper opening echoing around that still room. “I’m gonna give you whatever you want.” 

You whined at the abrupt feeling of his warm cock rubbing between your folds, its tip hitting your clit after every languid thrust. “Fuck,” you cried out, shaky. Jungkook wasn’t lying when he said that he was big, his length was so thick that you were starting to get second thoughts whether you could take it or not. Not that you would ever admit it out loud. “Just put it in, Jungkook.” 

But Jungkook was having way more fun just teasing you. “Pussy’s so wet for me.” He breathed out, his hands tightening around your hips. You felt him throb between your folds, and the sensation got you searching for air. “You’re soaking my cock, baby. You want it that much?”

“Y-Yeah.”  

Jungkook hummed, leaning in so he could place a kiss on your shoulder. “I’m gonna fuck you like you deserve to be fucked, princess,” he promised, his length still rubbing between your folds. He was so hard and heavy that your mind was spinning, your lungs drowning in expectation. “Gonna fuck you so well that you’re never going to forget it. Do you want that?”

“Yes,” your voice was a pathetic moan, and you hated your body for betraying you so easily. “Yes, please.” 

After another pec on your shoulder, Jungkook leaned back. “Be loud for me, alright?” He asked. “Can you do that for me?”

You swallowed hard — what were the chances that someone would hear you? You had no idea. “Yeah, whatever you want, just fuck me.”

“Whatever I want? That’s a dangerous thing to say.” He moved around behind you, making you flinch when you felt his cock align with your dripping entrance. The anticipation was driving you insane. “Might have to see if you’re up for it another time.” 

There was an answer somewhere in your mind — you could swear there was — but it was quickly forgotten the second that Jungkook pushed himself inside you. The drag of his cock was a delicious torture, streching you out and filling you up to the brim until you were shaking under his touch, both of you moaning at the sensation. 

“Oh my god.” You breathed out, hands turning into fists on the table. Your cheek was pressed against the polished wood, hot breath creating small white clouds on the surface. 

Jungkook released a shaky sigh when he felt you clenching around him, your body desperately trying to move closer to him. “Fuck, baby,” he hissed, his hands holding onto your hips for dear life. Gradually, he moved himself away from your pussy just so he could slam back inside, marveling on the way you trembled at the feeling, crying out his name in the prettiest of whimpers. “Your pussy is so fucking tight. Squeezing my cock so well.” 

Took you only an instant to realize that you were absolutely addicted to the feeling of his cock inside you, the heavenly push of his hardness in and out of you as he slowly started to set a pace. “Oh my god, I’m—” a pitiful hiccup interrupted you, turning your voice into a sharp cry. “That’s so good, Jungkook.”

Jungkook chuckled behind you, his thrusts starting to pick up speed. Your eyes closed in endless bliss, every part of your brain focused on the sensation of his fat length stretching you up. “Told you I’d be, not my fault you didn’t believe me,” he said, but you could tell that his confidence had started to wear itself thin — he, too, seemed to be much more focused on the way that your bodies met. “Do you touch yourself, princess?”

You almost didn’t know how to answer him, a deep heat rushing up to your cheeks. “W-What?”

“When you’re alone, baby,” he practically hissed. You were bouncing on the table then, your body jerking up and down as he fully pistoned his cock inside your heat. “Do you play with your little pussy?”

“Y-yes,” you stammered, embarrassed. “S-Sometimes.” 

“Show me how you do it,” he requested in-between huffs, lust dripping from every syllable. Jungkook spoke to you like a siren, effortlessly inducting you to comply with everything he wanted. “Come on. Don’t be shy, I wanna see you play with yourself for me.” 

You didn’t even know if what you were feeling was shyness, but there was a veil of hesitation that covered your actions. As your hands moved downwards, one of them clenching around the fabric of your dress and pulling it up while the other trailed over your mound, you felt strangely vulnerable, exposed. At the same time, you wanted to do what he asked you to, wanted him to wash you over with compliments until your mind was going blank. 

So you closed your eyes and focused on the sensation of two of your fingers coating themselves in your wetness, then their pressure on your clit. You whined at the feeling, pleasure exploding in your veins as you started to rub yourself, tracing small circles on your sensitive spot. There was no way you could ever reach that sensation again, the sweet motions of your fingers combining perfectly with the thrusts of his hard, fat cock inside you. You were doomed. 

“That’s it… just like that, baby,” Jungkook whispered, obsessed with the sensation of your walls fluttering around him. You had gotten so tight that he thought he would see heaven at any second now. “Feels good?” 

“Y-Yeah, so good...” you struggled to get out, “feels amazing, Jungkook.” 

“So perfect for me,” his praise shot straight up to your core, making you mewl under him. God, the way that you were tightening around him was going to drive him insane. “You feel so fucking good, I can’t stop fucking you.” 

Jungkook took one of his hands to your neck, using it to guide your body upwards until you had your back pressed against his chest; his hot lips assaulting your neck. The new position made it so much easier for his cock to drill inside you, reaching even deeper and hitting sweet spots you didn’t even know you had. It wasn’t long before you were moaning out, eyes fluttering shut as the pleasure overtook you. 

“Just take a look at that, baby,” his voice broke you out of your hypnotized state.  “Look at you. Such a good slut, just taking everything I’m giving you, touching yourself for my cock… fuck. Could watch you like this forever.” 

You had to take a moment to understand what he was talking about, and then you saw it: the window. It stood silently across the room from you, half open, and the glass combined with the darkness of the night gave a perfect reflection of the two of you. You could see yourself, the mess you had become, as Jungkook pounded in and out of you and your fingers worked on your clit; the darkness of his hungry gaze as he followed the motions of your body against his. 

Even if you cried out at the sight, your body freezed up a little at the thought of someone walking by and seeing that private spectacle. The possibility itself was minimal — the window gave way to the side of the land, where a big, thick fence separated it from the nearby houses; most of the ground covered by large trees and bushes — but it wasn’t zero. You couldn’t even begin to imagine the humiliation that would come from being seen like that. 

He, of course, noticed your change of demeanor right away, and you could see in the faint reflection that he had smirked at that realization. “What is it? Are you worried someone is going to walk by?” Jungkook almost groaned against your ear. His cock continued to pump ferociously in and out of you, and you couldn’t even understand your own thoughts for a moment. “That someone is gonna see you get fucked like a good slut?” 

“It’s not—” a moan cut your sentence short. Not like you knew where you were heading, anyways. 

“No one is gonna see you like this, know why?” Jungkook was grunting, his fingers tightening around your throat. You cried out at the feeling, your cunt clenching around him in a way that got him fucking you even harder. “Cause this is all for me. Just for me.” 

Then he was pushing you back on the table, your chest crashing against the wooden surface and his hands yanking you by the waist. Jungkook was fucking you so hard that your worries left you as soon as they arrived, your mind a turmoil of desires and broken exclamations that didn’t give space to anything else but him. 

“You look fucking gorgeous like this, stuffed with cock,” he marveled at the sight. There was a known wave of pleasure hovering over you, ready to crash at any given moment, and you stopped rubbing yourself just so you could prolong its arrival. “Wanna see you cum for me, make a mess for me, baby.” 

The words left you in a confusing, broken order, “Jungkook, I can’t… too much… can’t...” 

“Shhh, you can,” he was slowly easing you into your orgasm, his cock drilling in and out of your pussy. Jungkook fucked like a machine, fast and precise, and you didn’t think you’d be able to forget that anytime soon. “You told me you could take it, so now you’re gonna take it. Don’t you wanna be good for me?” 

“I- I want to… I’m so close,” you cried out, pressing your forehead against the table. You didn’t know how it hadn’t broken yet, with the way that Jungkook was fucking you so mercilessly hard. “I’m so, so close.”

“Cream my cock, baby, come on,” he urged you on, his member throbbing inside you at the thought. Your legs were so weak that you knew you’d fall facedown on the floor if he wasn’t supporting your weight with his strong arms. “Be a good girl and cream my cock for me.” 

And that was it. That was all that you needed to push yourself over the edge, submerging you in ecstasy and making you squeeze him so deliciously. “J-Jungkook!” You moaned out his name again and again, unsure of how loud you were being, but also not caring as much as you should. Jungkook realized he loved hearing you call his name more than anything else. “Fuck! Oh my god!”

“That’s it, baby,” he moaned back, his thrusts a sloppy, uncoordinated mess. He was hypnotized by the view of your cunt hugging him, your wetness dripping down your thighs as you rode out the last seconds of your orgasm. “Pussy’s so fucking tight, so fucking perfect— gonna cum too.” 

You gasped out at the sensitivity that was starting to spread, every movement shaky as you tried to push yourself against him. “Yes, please.” You looked over your shoulder, meeting his hooded gaze. Jungkook looked like a god, his dark hair sweaty and messy and his lip trapped between his teeth. That image would plague you forever. “Cum inside me, please.” 

He groaned loudly, eyes closing for a second. “Fuck, that’s so fucking hot,” he hissed, chest heaving with anticipation. You knew he was close, everything pointed to that, and all that you wanted was to see him reach his high, using your body like it was just a doll for him to fuck. “Didn’t know you’d want to be filled up with cum, princess.” 

“I’m full of surprises.” You smiled — a pretty, fucked-out smile that got Jungkook grunting like a madman. “I want your cum inside me, Jungkook, please.” 

“Gonna fuck you full of my cum, don’t worry— Shit.” The sounds he was making were heavily: those breathy, high-pitched moans that echoed all around you; broken by deep grunts that had your thighs shaking. Jungkook fucked himself in you like he was meant for it, throwing his head back and closing his eyes as he finally found his orgasm. “Fuck! That’s it, fuck—”

Jungkook called out your name and mixed it with praises and curses when he came, spilling himself inside your pussy. You sighed at the feeling, taking in the blissful sensation of having his hot cum spilling out of you, dripping down your legs as he continued to thrust inside you, milking out his orgasm. 

At last, he started to wince from sensitivity. His body collided against your back, his heavy breathing fanning your neck as he tried to collect himself. “Fuck, baby,” he mumbled, “you’re amazing.” 

“You’re not so terrible yourself.” You could not help the smile that appeared on your lips, nor the way that you melted against the surface of the table, drowning in his heat. 

Still, you couldn’t stay there for much longer: it was already a miracle that no one heard the chaos going on in that room, and you weren’t trying to push your luck for the night. Especially since you had a pile of homework (and possibly — now cold — takeout) waiting for you at home. 

You raised your body, leaning against your elbows. “I have to leave,” you told him, taking one of your hands to lay on top of his tattooed one, trying to ease his grip from your waist. “Now if you could just…” 

“Shhh, shhh,” Jungkook hushed, unrelenting. He was much stronger than you, and your muscles were too weak for you to try and do much, so you eventually gave up. “Stop moving. Let me feel you around me for just a bit more.” 

You frowned. “Why?”

“I like it,” he said simply. His breath was a faint caress against the skin of your neck, and you didn’t have much fight left in you. “We all have our tastes.” 

You rolled your eyes. “You’re so weird.”

“Don’t kinkshame.” Jungkook pouted, then pressed a kiss against your shoulder. “You just begged me to fuck you in a church, remember?” 

“Yeah, I guess I don’t have much place to judge.” You laughed dryly, then looked over your shoulder. “Why is your cock still hard? How long is this gonna take?” 

Jungkook groaned, clearly annoyed. “Shut up and enjoy the moment.” 

~ 

The so-called moment lasted about two more minutes (which was kind of impressive, you thought) before Jungkook softened and slipped out of you. You hated to admit but you kind of liked the feeling of having him still inside you, completing you as his lips danced around your neck; fingers tenderly playing with your hair. You never thought Jungkook would be so gentle after fucking you like that, but you guessed that you weren’t the only one that was full of surprises. 

Jungkook, apparently, also liked to admire his work. After he had slipped out of you, he made you sit back on the table just so he could stare at his own cum dripping out of you, a glimmer of satisfaction in his dark gaze. He had pushed his white release back inside you and smirked up at you, asking, ever so kindly, for you to go home like that, filled with his cum. 

You, of course, promptly accepted it. 

“By the way,” he called when you two had already stepped out of the church, enveloped by the coldness of the night. There was only one solitary light pole illuminating his features, making him look like one of the saints in the chapel — nothing but fake advertisement, in your opinion. “Wanna know how much I got in that immunology test?”

“How much?” You asked. 

“Eighty two.” Jungkook smiled brightly then, and you found yourself joining him. “Never saw a grade so high in my life. And that counts all the times I’ve cheated too.” 

“Seems like the tutoring sessions are paying off.” You crossed your arms before your chest, the hem of your dress swirling around your knees. The night was weirdly peaceful after everything that had taken place. 

“They are.” He nodded. “I’m looking forward to the next one. Helps that my tutor is kind of a hottie too.”

You scoffed. “So I’ve heard.”  

“And, by the way?” 

“Yeah?”

“You would look better without it.” He pointed at your dress, a sly smile already sprouting on his lips. “Hope to see it next time.”

“Good night, Jungkook.” You rolled your eyes, already turning around — yeah, like there would ever be a next time. 

~ 

BAD INFLUENCE COLLECTION

TAGLIST: 

@taehyungieskith​ @fan-ati--c​ @btstrasht​ @crazy4myself​ @sashimi-mochi @ft-multi @kooafraid @dianaaviny @ggukkieland @cryinginmypromdress @kissestothesky

[aprillikesthings]

...eh, I'm doing uhhh bits of Reunion. To start with. at least.

I had to remind myself when writing canon-based stuff that her room doesn't have windows. It just opens to the balcony. Do we think it never gets cold or windy, or that there's weather-repelling/shield spells of some kind?

Adora: where does Bow go when he's not at Bright Moon? Glimmer: uhhhhhhhhh

lol the SHADE

Glimmer: oh he's just never told me anything about himself ever :)

LOL poor Bow

scene: cuts to the Fright Zone

me: where is she

there she is!!

HELP LOL

the little hop and squeak she does before this doesn't make it LESS FUNNY which is unfortunate because she's in genuine distress, she thought she saw Shadow Weaver

don't mind me

angy baby is angy

okay i'm ngl i'm gonna skip a lot of this one, Adora's schoLAR accent gives me 2nd hand embarrassment lol

okay but this is great

Glimmer: THE FUCK, DUDE??? Bow: uhhhh Adora: YAY, SNACKS!!

Scorpia: *talking* Catra: *slowly closes her eyes with a pained expression*

seriously why is this expression so funny

Anyway tbh Catra's a dick in this one and not in a hot way

wait this one's even funnier

pfft

I'M WHEEZING

i swear to god tomorrow I'm gonna make a post that's just Catra's goofier faces from THIS EPISODE ALONE

wheezing

Adora makes some silly faces in the next scene but this post is getting toooooo long. Adora kicks a monster's ass, Bow and his dads are a metaphor for coming out, Lore dump

lol I was like "aww look at her" and then remembered what happens in this scene D:

caught lyin'

yeah I'm not screenshotting the scene of Hordak cutting off her air until she passes out. (you KNOW this only passed getting a y7 rating because he's not actually touching her and it's a forcefield sucking the air out of her space)

and then we see Shadow Weaver looming over Adora's bed, end episode, wooo

Can’t wait to engage in one of my fave midnight hobbies: get high as balls and rewatch bits of She-Ra and sometimes post screenshots with overemotional/horny captions