#drives me insane when they say we're the misogynistic ones

[lupon]

When will terfs realize that the reason they hate trans women so much is because of the deep-rooted misogynistic belief that femininity is inferior to masculinity. They hate the idea of someone they interpret as a man being feminine because throughout history, women have been the "weaker" gender prone to emotional outbursts and irrationality. Men "stooping down" to femininity when they're supposed to be strong and reliant scares them.

[aihoshiino]

chapter 165 thoughts

Aqua Hoshigan Status: It's Officially Hoshinover

Chapters Until The Story Ends Without The 143 Kiss Being Addressed Or Acknowledged: 1

damn i guess they really did just kill his ass

I'm gonna be so real with you gamers, I kind of don't have a lot to say about this one either lol. Which I acknowledge sounds completely wild given the Everything that happens in it, but most of my meat and potatoes analysis in these reviews comes from breaking down characterization and we're flying through everything at such breakneck pace that we're barely getting any characterization.

It continues to drive me bugfuck insane that Ai is completely absent from this finale despite the importance of 15 Year Lie. Its imagery is plastered all over but whenever we return to it, we just see Aqua. Not only that, but Gotanda is the one who insists on pushing the movie through for Aqua. 15YL as a story about Ai's true self and her tragedy is now officially taking a backseat to being about Aqua's tragic death and legacy. It was already bad enough that we spent so much time in the Movie Arc not actually focusing on Ai to the extent that, as everyone pointed out, based on what we saw on-page it was basically a Sad Kamiki Movie, but this really is just pissing right in the wound at this point lmao.

The funeral scene also serves as the final nail in the coffin for any Secretly Alive Aqua copes, which is kind of a relief. I still don't like how Aqua's death played out, but I think dragging it out for four chapters then going "sorry you thought i was /srs when i was just /jk" would have been infinitely more insulting. I don't like this ending, but I can respect that Akasaka seems to be sticking to his guns on it, even if we still do have like a whole chapter left for him to whip around and go "I WAS /JK ALL ALONG!!!!" but I don't see it happening.

Anyway, yeah! The funeral! Uh. Is it gonna sound weird if I say I felt kind of like… grossed out reading this the first time? Like, I really don't know how else to explain the visceral "why the fuck is the author making me read this" reaction I had to it. I think it's just because Kana is so fucking distraught here and the drama is just so hammy and so over the top that it feels kind of… ech. I dunno. I just really didn't vibe.

It doesn't help that this is part of a much broader pattern in the back half of OnK of Aka getting us right up close into the gory details of a character's complete mental breakdown and suffering and then spend zero time or focus on their recovery. This happened with Ruby all over the Movie Arc and this many times and with this little runway to the end of the series, it just starts to feel exploitative, like a way to cheaply pull at our heartstrings without doing the work to build everyone back up after tearing them down.

also pre-emptively dreading all the fuel this is going to add to the fires of People Who Are Weird And Misogynistic About Kana but she could die saving innocent children from a burning building and people would find reasons to be shitty about her lmao

we really are not seeing ruby's reaction to finding out her brother was dead huh lol

I will say the one thing I didn't Actively Dislike about this chapter was Ruby, though. I was honestly starting to get pretty skeeved out with how many people were gleefully predicting or actively wishing for her immediate suicide purely for ship motivated reasons and I was also worrying that the story was going to pretend that Ruby doesn't like. Have a life and support system outside of Aqua. Yes, she should absolutely be affected by his death but this period of her shutting down only to drag herself back onto her feet that we seem to be getting feels way more in line with pre-Movie Arc flanderization Ruby and I'll take that W where I can get it.

god. I haven't even talked about Kamiki's supposed serial killer cult. I just don't have the strength. Like… that's self-evidently stupid, right? I don't need to explain to you why that's ridiculous and unbelievable? You don't need me to tell you why it's fucking crazy that we're getting this information about the alleged overarching antagonist of the series not only in the second-to-last chapter of the entire series but after he was already dead, right? We can just move on? Ok good. jesus christ.

FINAL CHAPTER NEXT WEEK…

[11x13kyle]

I need to hear more about tweek being insane and craig being a dick in the au SKFJJF

the most dickish behavior that craig exhibits is that even though he himself doesn't say the most egregiously offensive things (usually) he lets it happen. like clyde can say the most horrifically misogynistic thing ever on the pod and craig doesn't say a WORD. it's not his business. he sees everything as not his business. their podcast is frequently sponsored by and donated to by these horrible people and organizations and craig doesn't care because it's not his business. his fans will doxx people and drive them to suicide and craig hasn't said one single thing to stop it. he does not give a shit about ANYTHING.

now tweek is just so fucking insane, particularly in a conspiracist way. he believes in most conspiracy theories in the way of believing that he's unlocked some kind of secret to society and believes wholeheartedly that the government and the deep state has plans to kill him. when epstein died he was convinced everyone on the pod was in danger because "OH GOD WE KNOW TOO MUCH ABOUT SOCIETY WE'RE NEXT THEY'RE GONNA FUCKING KILL US!!!!!!!!!" tweek also has a panic attack every time he flies home because he has to go through the denver international airport and he fully believes in all of the conspiracies about the illuminati surrounding it. he also thinks bluecifer is going to come to life and kill him (this happened to kenny once btw so its not unfounded)

kyle and cartman want tweek on fireside SO BADLY because they want to see just how far his insane takes go, but tweek isn't allowed to fraternize with the enemy, even if he wanted to, which he doesn't. the only one who has been on fireside is jimmy because he can do whatever he wants and he thought it would be hilarious. craig is very protective of tweek because he knows kyle and cartman are gonna pull some bullshit and fuck with tweek. so, they try to pull out the tried and true tweek vs craig strategy and pit them against each other. if they break up as a result, that is simply a sacrifice that kyle and cartman are willing to make!

kyle takes tweek out for coffee and is like "are you really going to let him control you like that? you're a grown man, isn't that fucked up?" and tweek is like "WAIT YEAH IT IS FUCKED!!!!!!!!!!!" and at the end of their meeting kyle goes "hey...if you ever need anything, just shoot me a text or call me. hell, you can even swing by my place, if you want! just let me know :)" (<- fully intends to have the recording equipment all set up)

meanwhile cartman is with craig going "god dude don't you get tired of this shit, just let him do what he wants. you know, the other day, i heard tweek say that he hates that you won't let him go on our pod. he thinks you're too controlling. and he also said that you love the taste of human shit." and craig kind of buys into it because cartman is really good at convincing people of stupid shit.

[storkmuffin]

A friend (Korean woman in Korea) told me about a 25 yr old guy who stabbed his ex-girlfriend, also 25, to death. It's been revealed that he's a med student and got a perfect score on the college admissions test and got media coverage for it at the time. The question my friend asked was, "Do you think that the reason he killed her was because he's never been rejected, ever, like - he got a perfect score and got into med school, and couldn't accept that she would want to leave someone like him?"

And I just felt so fucking tired but it's not my friend's fault so I said, "OK by that rule then no man who was bad at school or doesn't make a lot of money or is short or ugly or poor should ever kill a woman and we know that isn't true, right?"

That seemed to stop her short so I added, "Misogynist men murder women because we're women, and any sort of man can be a misogynist. A lot of men hate women a LOT. Also why do we have to know about what his dreams and plans were for his life? Why instead aren't we told how many women were murdered so far by a man they knew? That woman probably did everything she could think of to do to have a 'nice' break up - why aren't we told about all the things she tried that didn't work for her?"

And I think I went too far and made it too scary because my friend did that thing of walking backwards away from me when I get my scary autistic feminist face on. Oh I forgot to say - my friend also graduated from a prestige university as well as her husband, so for her this is personal because I guess kids who are brilliant at rote memorization tests aren't supposed to commit murder and like, she really thought that women who get murdered by exes made the mistake of not being good enough for men who went to the Top 3.

The Korean media coverage about the Gangnam Exit 10 killer was just like this too - they talked about how the killer, who specifically said he waited until a woman showed up to his hiding spot to kill one, had at one point been a divinity student or something. The chatter about this murderer is like, Gosh why did someone so smart have to waste his life and become a murderer in this way? Shame attaches so automatically to the woman who got murdered that even her family is asking that nothing about her get revealed. There isn't a discourse about how "she had her whole life ahead of her" and like "This is what she majored in at university" or whatever about the woman who got killed. The fact that she was someone's girlfriend that wasnt loved enough to not get slaughtered by him is shameful so we're all supposed to turn away and let her family mourn in silence. It drives me insane about my culture. If you have a crime happen to you the shame is ON YOU somehow. Not being forced to lose your anonymity after you lose your life is supposedly protective to the dead, but that's so bullshit to me.

[cellsshapedlikestars]

Quick ask: Do you have any Sabriel AU's for jon/sansa? If you don't would you be interested in writing one? Especially one that had a lot of great Sansa and Arya moments. I love that your Sansa and Arya moments in your fic. I feel like people who think that Sansa and Arya hate each other have never had a sister.

I don't! It's actually been a long time since I've read them, I was just shelving something today and saw them and remembered how much I loved them. I always mean to reread them, but I'm so terrible about sitting down to read anymore that I never get around to it. Sigh. But as usual, I never say never!

As for the Sansa & Arya stuff - it genuinely boggles my mind that people are soooo convinced Sansa is some evil bully who lived to torment her sister, and that she & Arya will hate each other when reunited. It really does reek of only child syndrome (obviously not all), or like, they had a genuinely horrible older sibling (which obviously does happen). Or they're a misogynist/deep in their NLOG phase and are using her "bullying" Arya to justify how much they hate her lol

But I think most people with siblings should be able to look at their relationship and go - oh, yeah. Valid.

Like, my older sister and I committed war crimes against each other. And while I can remember every single one in vivid detail that she committed against me, mine against her are suspiciously blurry and hard to remember. I can even look back on some things she did and point to it as the source of a trauma, and I know I said horrible things to her that I will not list here because they're genuinely awful and I feel so bad about them now and I guarantee I gave her some sort of complex.

But the thing is, we were kids. Neither of us were bullies. Neither of us are sociopaths or psychopaths or anything else. We were kids with too many emotions, shoved into the same house and forced to be around each other all the time. Now we're adults and she is the person I trust most in the entire world. I love her, even if she still, to this day, can drive me insane like no one else can.

I think GRRM did a good job writing them as actual siblings, and if it was a fluke, then it was a fluke that worked. If it wasn't a fluke, then I guarantee when Sansa & Arya meet up again, they'll have each other's backs, even if they drive each other insane. Even if they don't agree on almost anything.

This went long and ranty, anon! so much for a quick ask lol

[acourtofthought]

Girl every time I go into the elucien tag (so basically every day) I see some fresh shit that e/riels are trying to stir up with you and every day I wonder, "how is this person so eloquent and calm in the face of such disrespect and stupidity?" And every day I continue to be in awe of you, I have absolutely no idea how you do it

(but thank you ❤️)

😊😘 It will never not drive me insane when they post some of the worst stuff about Elucien's and Gwynriels, when they completely slander Lucien and Gwyn's characters and we simply respond to the things we've heard / seen them saying and then they send Anons telling us "your opinion is no more valid than anyone else's" and "how dare you try to say E/riel wouldn't be compatible and call him a torturer" and "you don't keep your blog Elucien only as you should be doing" and "you're not in SJMs head and you have no idea what her plan is" and "your behavior in the fandom is horrible" and "it's insensitive for you to talk about E/riels sending threats to the author" WHAT?!? Are they not the ones constantly telling us we're delusional because they know for a fact E/riel is endgame (gee, that sure sounds like they're convinced they know what SJMs plan is)? That we're misogynists for shipping Elain with Lucien (that doesn't sound very respectful to all opinions). Are they not the ones constantly saying Gwyn is going to be evil and Lucien is harassing Elain (sure doesn't sound like they're keeping their blogs to just E/riel). Is it not concerning that they're more worried about me mentioning the threats on my blog than actually going to the E/riels who have made the threats and telling them to knock it off? Is it not a little weird that my behavior is apparently horrible when they're the ones coming to my blog in order to send me hate anons? And Az is a torturer for the IC, right? All I'm doing is drawing conclusions, same as them, and presenting my ideas. For some reason, that is threatening to them even though they do the exact same thing. I even try to include a lot of "I think" and "I believe" and "this is why I don't think", in my posts which should be sufficient to let people know I myself do not communicate with SJM and am not proclaiming to have insider information. Sorry, I went on a bit of a rant there. Your message was so sweet you were probably looking for a "thank you so much, have a nice day!" 😂 But seriously, thank you so much. I get a bit feisty after some E/riel anons (though I will say, it does wonders for kickstarting my brain for new posts) and getting messages like yours reminds me to take a few deep breaths. ❤️

[terfezis]

I don't know how you can stay, or maybe even be, nice in this fight. Because it's not a nice fight. Speaking as somebody from the other side who respects your desire to actually communicate and be respectful, the entire gender thing is one enormous, seething mass of trauma scar tissue. I cannot forgive people who want to legislate a lack of treatment that the research is showing us causes trans-identifying people to get serious, and very preventable, PTSD - particularly when it's also showing that when they get it early enough, trans people have attempted suicide rates comparable to the general population. And I don't want perverts harming women by taking advantage of rights meant to support transwomen, either - but I don't see evidence that that happens except when they're actually literally cismen (or Chris-Chan, who I very much wish could be shot into space.) I know there are going to be transbians who say 'if you don't like my dick you're a transphobe' and I want to bash them over the skull with a mailbox, but I also think it's transphobic to characterize transgender people this way in general, just as it's bigoted to characterize feminists as being all about hating men and nothing else. But I do not view this as an equal fight. I very much view it as a more privileged minority - women - trying to oppress a less privileged minority - transgender people of any gender. You may be stepping on us to reach your real enemy, but you're stepping on us, whether we're 'really men/women' or not. And I've seen too many genuinely misogynistic conservatives leap with joy to see gender critical feminists, and I watch this and scratch my head as the gender critical feminists just, let them in, like, hi, have some cake, so glad we agree that these insane TRAs need to be denied lifesaving medical care and legislated out of being allowed to pee without getting outed, just don't track your sexist sandwich jokes in with you on the rug. How the hell can that be polite? How the hell can that be a reasonable debate? Maybe this is uncharitable. But I feel a thousand times safer publicly pretending to be a cis lesbian than admitting I am a trans bisexual man. And watching people who applaud or join you literally laughing at our suicide rate is driving me crazier and crazier.

1. I don’t laugh or applaud at suicide

2. I can’t take the rest of this seriously because do you actually think that women as a class are privileged