#drive around a bit I guess and see what's open on a Sunday

[teamcavota]

god I know its bad to say it but I want my grandparents to go home so badly. my dad just gets so weird when they're around I don't know how to describe it. like today he got mad at me claiming he told me to make dinner, but at most he told me to think about it (along with everyone else!). like the words "can you make dinner" never come out of his mouth.

also I zoned out once while we were going in somewhere and didn't notice my grandma needing help. now admittedly I feel bad about this one for obvious reasons, but my dad just goes overboard and ignores the 99% of the other times I'm first out of the car to help her. like it only matters if I slip up and its pissing me off. I wanted to make a nice dinner tomorrow to make up for it, but at the same time the other half of me hardly wants to be home and just go out to eat.

[pucksandpower]

The Girlfriend Test

Lando Norris x girlfriend!Reader

Summary: no new LN merch is deemed ready for sale unless it passes the girlfriend test (or in which you are Lando’s favorite hoodie thief and the sight of another driver’s brand on you drives him just a little bit crazy)

You hear the front door open and close, followed by the sounds of Lando rummaging around in the entryway. “Babe, I’m home!” He calls out.

You’re curled up on the couch in his latest hoodie design, a soft charcoal grey number with black sleeves and his LN logo embroidered over the heart.

“In here!” You reply. Lando comes into the living room and smiles when he sees you wearing his new creation.

“Well hello there, hoodie thief,” he says, leaning down to give you a quick peck on the lips before flopping down on the couch next to you. “So I see you found my newest sample.”

You grin and snuggle further into the super soft fleece. “I don’t know what you’re talking about. This is my hoodie now.”

Lando laughs and tugs lightly on the hood. “Oh is it now? I could’ve sworn this was a prototype I brought home from my design meeting a few days ago.”

“Nope, definitely mine,” you say cheekily. “It’s so cozy I don’t think I can ever take it off.”

“In that case, I guess it passes the girlfriend test with flying colors,” Lando declares. At your confused look, he elaborates. “Oh, I never told you about the girlfriend test? I can’t launch a new LN design until you have stolen it out of my closet. That’s how I know for sure it’s comfy enough for my fans.”

You raise an eyebrow in amusement. “You’re telling me every hoodie so far has passed this supposed test?”

“You got it,” Lando grins. “I’ll leave the samples laying around and if you end up snagging one and wearing it all the time, I know it’s prime merchandise.”

You think back and realize it’s true — Lando’s hoodies have a habit of migrating into your wardrobe. The papaya one is your go-to for grocery store runs. The tie-dye version is your favorite for lazy Sundays. Even the bold purple hoodie he released last month has already earned a permanent place on your desk chair.

“So you mean to tell me this was all part of your master plan?” You ask in mock offense. “And here I thought I was sneakily stealing your comfiest clothes.”

“Baby, if I really didn’t want you wearing my stuff, I wouldn’t make it so tempting to take,” Lando says sincerely, wrapping an arm around you. “But it makes me so happy to see you in my designs, wearing my brand.”

You cuddle into his shoulder. “That’s really sweet, babe.”

“Anything for my number one fan and favorite hoodie model,” he says, planting a kiss on the top of your head.

You snuggle together in contented silence for a few minutes, your head tucked perfectly under his chin.

“So, how was the simulator today?” You ask. “Get some good practice in for Monza this weekend?”

Lando nods. “Yeah, had a really solid session. Tweaked a few things with the setup that I think will help with the low downforce.”

“Nice,” you say. “Maybe another podium this week?”

“We’ll see,” Lando replies. “Ferrari looked quick in Spa so it could be tough. But I feel good going into the weekend.”

“Well, I know you’ll kill it babe,” you say supportively. Lando smiles gratefully and pulls you closer.

“But anyway, enough about F1. How was your day off?” He asks.

You launch into a recap of your relaxed day — sleeping in, catching up on chores, and working on some creative projects you’ve had on the backburner. Lando listens intently, asking questions and commenting on the new songs and recipes you’re dying to try. The conversation flows easily, as it always does between you two.

Before you know it, Lando’s stomach rumbles loudly and you both crack up. “I guess that means it’s dinnertime,” you say, checking your phone. “Pizza sound good?”

“You read my mind,” Lando replies. While you call in the usual order from your favorite local pizza joint, Lando queues up Netflix and scrolls through options for tonight’s viewing.

Thirty minutes later you’re back on the couch, the coffee table littered with pizza boxes and cans of soda. Lando hits play on an episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine and you settle in, toes tucked under his legs to stay cozy.

You’re only halfway through the episode when you feel Lando’s gaze on you. You turn and find him staring at you wearing his newest hoodie creation, a small smile on his lips.

“What’s that look for?” You ask around a mouthful of pizza.

Lando shakes his head, the smile growing wider. “Nothing really. Just thinking about how lucky I am.”

You tilt your head curiously and he continues. “I have my dream job, getting to race cars for a living. And then I come home to you and … I don’t know. It just feels really good. Like everything is kind of falling into place.”

You set down your pizza slice and cuddle up to him. “Aww babe. That’s so sweet.” You give him a greasy kiss on the cheek. “I’m the lucky one you know. I get to see you living your dream every day. And then I get to be here to celebrate the wins with you and cheer you up after the tough days. It’s pretty amazing.”

Lando wraps both arms around you in a hug. “Love you so much,” he says softly.

“Love you more,” you whisper back, your head tucked perfectly under his chin once again.

***

The next evening, you’re sprawled across the bed browsing on your phone when you hear Lando come home.

“Honey, I’m home!” He calls out in a sing-song voice. You grin, expecting him to come give you a kiss. But instead you hear his footsteps stop abruptly.

“Babe, what … is that?” Lando asks slowly.

You look up confused. “What do you mea-”

Then you spot what he’s staring at in horror: the soft teal hoodie you’re wearing with an embroidered Enchanté logo across the front.

“Oh this?” You say casually. “It’s from Daniel’s new merch drop. The fleece is so soft, I couldn’t resist snagging one.”

Lando’s jaw drops open. “You … you bought a hoodie? From a competing merch brand?”

You stifle a laugh at how seriously Lando is taking this. “Well yeah, you gotta support your friends right? And I told you how comfy it looked in his posts.”

Lando just blinks slowly, looking utterly betrayed. You almost feel bad for riling him up.

“Babe, come on, don’t look at me like that! You know I’m your number one fan.” You get up and go to hug him, but Lando dodges you.

“Nope. No hugs until that … that enemy hoodie comes off,” he says dramatically.

Now you really have to hold back your laughter. “Lando, don’t be silly.”

But he crosses his arms and sticks his chin up. “I’m dead serious, Y/N. My own girlfriend, wearing another man’s merch!” He shakes his head in despair.

You bite your lip, trying not to smile at his antics. Time to have some more fun with this.

“Well if you’re going to be like that, maybe I’ll just keep it on,” you say nonchalantly, snuggling back into the ridiculously soft fleece.

Lando’s eyes go wide. “You wouldn’t dare!”

You raise your eyebrows challengingly. “Try me.”

You stare each other down for a few tense moments, before Lando huffs loudly.

“Fine then. Desperate times call for desperate measures.” And with that ominous statement, he lunges forward and lifts you up, tossing you over his shoulder.

“Lando!” You shriek through laughter. “Put me down!”

But he marches down the hall determinedly, you still slung over his shoulder. He brings you into the living room and gently tosses you onto the couch. Before you can react, he rips the Enchanté hoodie up over your head in one swift move.

“Lando!” You squeal, trying to reach for the hoodie, but he’s quicker. In a flash, he has the offending article of clothing in his grip.

“How could you bring this … this enemy propaganda into our home?” Lando accuses dramatically. He holds the hoodie between two fingers like it’s contaminated.

You have to press a hand over your mouth to contain your giggles. Lando looks utterly scandalized at the sight of you in his rival’s merch.

“I’m sorry babe, but you left me no choice,” Lando says solemnly. And with that, he crosses the room, opens the fireplace, and tosses the hoodie in.

You gasp loudly. “Lando Norris, did you just burn my hoodie?”

“I had to protect the sanctity of this home! Can’t have you falling for another man’s branding,” Lando exclaims. But you can see his facade cracking as he fights back a smile of his own.

You get up from the couch and poke him in the chest. “You’re absolutely ridiculous, you know that?”

Lando grins sheepishly. “Maybe. But you love me.”

You roll your eyes but can’t fight back your own smile. “Debatable at the moment,” you joke.

Lando pouts and gives you his best puppy dog eyes. “Come onnnn, you know I’m your favorite driver.”

You pretend to think about it for a moment. “Hmm well Daniel does give the best hugs ...”

“Hey!” Lando exclaims and tackles you into a bear hug. You dissolve into giggles as he squeezes you tight and sways you back and forth.

“Nope, absolutely not allowed,” he declares, still holding you captive.

You lean back to look up at him with a smile. “Oh yeah? And why’s that?”

“Because you’re my girl and I don’t share,” Lando states matter-of-factly. His eyes are soft now as he gazes down at you.

You feel your heart melt a little. You stand on your tiptoes to give him a sweet kiss. “You’re right, I’m all yours Lando.”

His answering smile is dazzling. But then a thought seems to occur to him and a grin spreads across his face.

In one smooth motion, he strips off the neon green hoodie he’s wearing, leaving just a black t-shirt underneath. Before you can react, he pulls it down over your head, enveloping you in soft fleece that smells like him.

“There. That’s better,” Lando declares satisfied.

You snuggle happily into Lando’s worn hoodie, his warmth still lingering in the fabric. Looking down, you recognize it as the exclusive design he wore constantly last season.

Lando’s eyes crease with happiness as he looks at you swimming in his hoodie. “That’s my girl,” he says softly, pulling you close again.

You nuzzle into his chest, perfectly content.

“Am I forgiven for my momentary lapse in loyalty?” You ask cheekily, peering up at him.

Lando pretends to consider this for a moment. “Hmmm, I guess I can let it slide this one time,” he teases back. “But only because you look so damn cute in my clothes.”

You smile and tighten your arms around him. You sway together slowly, Lando humming tunelessly under his breath. The fireplace crackles gently beside you.

After a few moments, Lando speaks again, his voice quiet. “You know I was only joking around before, right? You can wear whatever you want babe.”

You lean back to meet his gaze. His brown eyes are warm but serious now.

You touch his cheek softly. “Of course I know that Lando. Your hoodies might be the comfiest, but they’re not the only clothes I own.”

Lando nods, looking relieved that you understand. “I just never want you to feel like you have to choose between me and your own style or interests.” His voice is earnest. “I want you to always feel free to be yourself.”

Your heart swells at his words. You reach up and kiss him tenderly. When you pull back, Lando is smiling again.

“Thanks babe,” you say. “That really means a lot to me. And same to you, obviously.”

Lando grins. “Of course, it’s you and me against the world! Oh, and McLaren against the other teams,” he adds cheekily.

You laugh and snuggle back into his chest. “Yes, McLaren over all,” you agree, just to make him happy.

“That’s my girl,” Lando says again, pressing a kiss to the top of your head.

[stonedstr8]

TOKE 'N STROKE

"Ads are getting so damn invasive." Lucas thought to himself, clicking skip on yet another pointless car commercial interrupting the video essay he was watching. "You think the algorithm would know its audience by now, I'm too gay to drive!"

He laughed a little bit at the joke, running a hand through his soft, bleached blonde hair. He was the epitome of a high-maintenance twink, with his smooth, hairless body and perfect sense of style. He was smart too and liked to boast about it, with a scholarship for his English Lit degree and being made President of his university's LGBT Chapter, which he was hoping to use as a stepping stone to become Student Body President next year.

Leaning back again in his chair he reached for his cellphone, seeing a text from his boyfriend Alex.

Alex: "Hey cutie, still busy with finals this weekend, but have time for a dinner date Sunday night?"

He smiled to himself, giving an eager text back to set it up, and to wish him well on his upcoming exams. "Ugh, I need to start studying too, Monday's going to be one hell of a final... I'll focus on it and head to the library after this video and-"

Just like that, his train of thought was interrupted again by a stupid ad, this time some obnoxious psychedelic visuals and a bad electric guitar riff blared out of his monitor. It startled him so badly that he seized up for a second, accidentally clicking the ad and being brought to their store page. "Broski's Bud's, one stop ship and shop for weed strains to fix your brain..." He rolled his eyes at the cringe marketing, getting ready to close the tab when a pop-up opened trying to tell him all about a deal he 'wouldn't want to miss out on'. "No thanks, stupid site, you can keep your Bro Buds or whatever to yourself." but every time he hit X on the popup another would open, being more and more insistent each time about new deals, until finally a desperate '90% OFF AND SPECIAL STARTER KIT AS A BONUS WITH YOUR FIRST PURCHASE' filled his screen. "FINE," he scoffed at his computer, "I'll take a look at the stupid site. My therapist suggested I try out weed to help lessen my anxiety anyways, so might as well get a good deal on it..."

Clicking the pop-up added the 'starter kit' to his cart, it was a pack of pre-rolled blunts and some sort of mystery box, but the description didn't help him understand it much either. "Get ready to step into the zone and open ur mind with this one bros, Broski's Buds bestselling strain, Toke 'n Stroke, is sure to change your life by stimulating a high never felt before! This isn't your sissy uncle's strain, this shit puts hair on your chest like a real man!"

"God this is so cringe, I bet they get all kinds of business marketing to the dumb jocks in town, no wonder their brains are mush. Still, it's just weed and for $20 I might as well give it a try, I probably won't find it cheaper anywhere else..." sitting in thought about it for a few seconds, Lucas finally filled in his payment info and placed his order, getting a free upgrade to same-day delivery since they seem to have a storefront a few miles from his apartment.

"Well, there goes my library plans I guess, I'll have to wait around for delivery since my package will probably get swiped otherwise..." Lucas sighed, turning off his computer and plopping down onto the couch, picking up his Switch to play Animal Crossing and kill time.

A few hours passed and the sky got dark before finally a long buzz came from his intercom. "Took them long enough, it's nearly 9pm!" he complained, putting his jacket on to head downstairs. When he got down there the delivery guy had already gotten into his car again, driving away and leaving Lucas to carry the package back upstairs all on his own. It was bigger than he expected, taking both hands to lift it and keep it stable. "Jesus, this thing must weight like 40 pounds! What did they put in here?"

After a bit of struggling and the occasional break to catch his breath, Lucas pushed his package into the living room, collapsing on the floor next to it for a while. "After that workout I'm surprised I don't look like the douchebags around campus." he laughed to himself, bouncing up to get a box cutter and pry his package open. After taking the carton of pre-rolled blunts out, he started into the box with a bit of confusion and disgust, pulling things out one after the other.

"A sleeveless tank top that says 'Toke 'n Stroke Bro'... A pair of douchey sunglasses... Some red gym shorts, socks and slides... Ew, a snapback saying 'Who ate all the pussy?', why the fuck would anyone wear this!... And 2 dumbbells, no wonder this thing was so heavy! All of this is useless shit that's gonna end up in a donation bin now, I'll have to drop this trashy stuff off tomorrow on my way to the library... But hey, at least the weed seems fine, smells... potent." He said, tossing everything back into the box and taking a whiff of one of the blunts.

Kicking back on the couch again, he played with the blunt in his hand for a while before finally having the courage to light it up, taking a hit. Immediately he started coughing, not used to the sensation, but it did make his brain start to feel... fuzzy. "Damn, okay I need to push past it and get used to it." he said, lighting up for another hit of the blunt, this time barely a cough escaping his throat, feeling suspiciously more used to it. Then another, and another, until finally the whole blunt was gone. Sitting in his daze for a while, he enjoyed the sensation of his mind drifting around experiencing the high, his anxiety melting away as if he didn't have a care in the world. Eventually he decided to try and get up, but his body slumped over off the couch and hitting the floor, the room fading to black...

...

When Lucas finally came to again, the first thing that hit him was the strong smell of weed floating around in the air. "Damn bro, did I smoke the whole set or what..." he laughed groggily, getting ready to stretch out and get back to laying on the couch before he was startled by the sound of moaning blasting from his TV, eyes shooting open in confusion. On the screen, two busty lesbians were making out, them taking turns groping each others boobs and fingering each other. "What the fuck bro, how long has this been on?" he cursed, nervous that the neighbors nextdoor might have heard it playing as he started desperately looking for the remote.

When he couldn't find it in the cushions, he got up from the couch only to be met with his feet kicking a bunch of empty beer cans. "Dude, there's gotta be 2 dozen thrown all over the floor, did I have a party or something? I don't even know anyone who drinks beer..." he mumbled, going to scratch his head in confusion, but was even more confused when instead of his hair he felt a hat on top of his head. "Huh?" he thought, as he looked down at the floor again, noticing that instead of his skinny jeans and converse he was now wearing the socks and slides from the box, along with the sleeveless tank top and the shorts too. He stumbled his way to the bathroom door still baked out of his mind, mouth dropping open at his reflection in the full-length mirror in front of him.

"Broooo, am I dreaming or what the fuckkkk is going on" he said in disbelief. No more was the cute, pale twink he used to be staring back at him. Instead, a douchey bro he didn't recognize was standing face to face with him. Tanned skin, pillowy muscles, his once blonde hair turned into a brown buzz cut and with that stupid "Who ate all the pussy?" hat slapped over it. He touched his face, feeling along his chin where his once smooth skin now had a rougher texture, and a trashy chinstrap sprouted from his jawline. He slapped his face a few times in his daze, trying to wake up from the dream and growing more confused each time nothing changed.

Turning around and staggering back to his living room to try and make sense of what's going on, it hit him that he barely recognizes the room anymore. His apartment used to be perfectly maintained and well-decorated, now there was beer cans all over the floor, along with dirty socks and cummed-in underwear, greasy pizza boxes and chip bags all over the table and counter, the decorations on his walls had been torn down and replaced with posters of chicks in bikinis and sports teams, his Switch replaced with an X-Box and a stack of COD games next to it, DVD cases of trashy bro-comedies were thrown around near the TV too... Then the smell hit him, it STUNK in here, like a sickening mixture of weed, cheap body spray, and sour BO wafting in a heat around the room. "Bro, it fucking reeks in here... Or wait..." he mumbled as he gave himself a whiff, "I fucking reek!"

After a bit of stunned silence he finally started to process things in his brain again. How the fuck did he get like this, was any of this even real, and how does he get back to normal? He plopped back onto the couch, picking up his phone to see he had a handful of missed texts and calls from his boyfriend before noticing the time... 2:00pm. On Sunday. He had somehow been blacked out for 2 whole nights, with no memory of anything that had happened. While getting ready to call his boyfriend back, Lucas felt his insides rumbling and at first he thought it was from the munchies because of all the weed, but then he realized "Oh bro, all that double-cheese pizza is really gonna fucking..."

*PHRRRBBBTTT!*

His body instinctively lifted its leg as it pushed out the loudest and most obnoxious fart he'd ever ripped in his life, as his body seemed to react on its own, letting out an immature laugh and wafting the air before muttering "Fuck yeah bro, smells like victory!" He leaned back into the couch, remembering he needed to call Alex, but the loud moaning on the TV caught him off guard again. This time he locked eyes with the screen, the cock in his shorts immediately bulging and straining at the sight of the lesbian porn before him. "I really need to turn this shit off and get whatever's going on sorted out..." he thought, but he realized he couldn't move his hand to reach for his phone, instead it reacted on its own, reaching down his waistband to pull out his cock and start stroking for the busty babes on TV.

"All I do is Toke 'n Stroke, bro..." a voice in his head seemed to say, except it didn't come from within, he spoke it directly out of his own mouth.

"Wait, I didn't say that bro, it's-" he tried to talk, realizing that his thoughts echoed around stuck in his own head, not even leaving the lips of his own body. He was just stuck there, watching in a dazed horror as he went on autopilot.

"Toke 'n Stroke bro, I'm such a loyal customer Broski's Buds will HAVE to take me as a hype boy this time haha!" his voice spoke again, continuing to stroke for the porn on TV, Lucas's eyes stuck fixed on the screen. Suddenly though, he was interrupted by his phone vibrating, a text from his boyfriend coming through.

Alex: "Hey cutie, I hope everything is alright? You haven't answered my calls or texts in a couple days, I know it's busy with all your studying but we do still have dinner planned for tonight. Still on for me to pick you up at 5?"

"Oh thank God," Lucas thought, reading the message, "I can tell him what's going on and have him come over to help me fix this shit!" Unlocking his phone, Lucas let out a sigh of relief as he got ready to reply, only for his body to still be taken over by whatever douchey daze it was stuck in.

Lucas: "dont u ever come around me u faggy creep, if me or my bros ever catch u within 100 feet of us we'll give u the beating of a lifetime! fuck around n find out if u dare to show ur face here."

Lucas screamed internally as the message was typed out and sent in front of his very eyes, before his hand moved to block his boyfriend's number and turn his phone off. "Something is seriously fucking wrong with me bro, I need to-"

*PHHRRRRBBBTTTTTT*

Another obnoxious and sickening fart blasted out of his ass, filling the room and breaking Lucas's thoughts down into a daze again, as he felt around under the couch for something before pulling a sweaty, well-used fuck toy of a girls ass and pussy up from the mess.

As Lucas once again locked eyes with the TV, he took another hit from his dwindling blunt stash, finishing up the last one. After throwing what was left onto the floor, he prepared the fuck toy and slid it right down onto his cock, starting to bounce the toy up and down as he edged himself closer to finishing.

"If I can't figure out a way to snap out of this, I'm so fucked..." he thought, as his voice spoke again. "Toke 'n Stroke bro, this chick is soooo getting fucked!" He moaned, as he shot his thick load into the toy, feeling some of his braincells permanently shoot out with it, sloppily wiping the mess on the cushion next to him as he laid back, feeling his insides start to bubble again.

Lucas had a lot of Bro Time to catch up on, but luckily his new favorite weed strain was making sure that he was a captive audience until he was fully converted and assimilated into just another Bro.

[loaksky]

i don’t celebrate thanksgiving, but could you guys imagine college!ellie taking roommate!reader home to jackson because she’d be alone for the holiday? short lil oneshot to get back into the groove of writing. do i hate this? yes.

recommended songs: alabama haint — penny and sparrow + what once was — her’s

warnings: language, a few brief mentions of family issues, suggestive content (kissing among other things) + mild sexual content, a lil misunderstanding and angst bc who am i if i don’t ??, CONFESSIONS because i’m a sloot for them. i think that’s it? not proofread ofc heh

it’s the weekend before thanksgiving, sunday to be exact, and ellie’s packing her backpack for joel’s. the energy in the the room’s a little off despite the fact that you’re normally reserved, and even though the two of you have only met this year, ellie’s learned to read you pretty well.

“you goin’ home for thanksgiving?” ellie asks absently, trying to make small talk as she rolls a sleep shirt and some pajamas haphazardly to stuff at the top of her bag.

there’s a pause that makes her brain itch before she sees the way you shake your head from where you’re hunched over a textbook at your desk.

“my family’s all over the place right now,” you answer honestly.

and ellie doesn’t know if you mean that figuratively or literally, but the lack of emotion in your voice tells her that maybe she shouldn’t pry. she can’t help it, though. because you’re her sweet and quiet roommate who’d been serious (and maybe a little scary) at first, but turned out to be a goofball with a little bit of prodding.

so seeing you like this, checked out and maybe a little stressed, ellie treads cautiously.

“so you’re gonna stay here?” she asks.

you don’t even spare her a glance.

“yeah.” your shoulders shrug. “no point in dropping so much money for a plane ticket if i’m going to be sitting home alone anyways.”

ellie makes a noise in the back of her throat and you throw look over your shoulder.

“sorry,” you offer softly, smile sheepish. “that was a little depressing.”

ellie shakes her head.

“no, i get it,” she assures you. “my family’s not really...”

you blink at her as she trails off.

“conventional? i guess?”

another quiet blankets the two of you and ellie’s speaking before she can even filter through the repercussions of her next words.

“you’re always welcome to...y’know...come with,” she says, scratching the back of her neck. “it’s not even a two hour drive.”

you hope ellie can’t tell that your cheeks are burning.

“you don’t have to, of course,” ellie blabbers. “but joel’s cool, so’s my uncle and his wife. it’d be nice, i think. and jackson’s pretty fun around this time of year...”

“i don’t wanna imp—”

ellie breathes a laugh.

“don’t,” she warns you, tips of her ears burning. “you’re more than welcome, seriously.”

it’s how you end up in the passenger seat of ellie’s old 4runner, heater on blast while sublime plays on the radio.

the car ride had consisted of ellie munching on cold fries the two of you had picked up from mcdonald’s before the interstate and you finally opening up about how your parents are divorced and how the holidays are a lot more stressful than they are pleasant.

ellie really feels for you, definitely knows the feeling losing her mom at a pretty young age and being adopted in middle school by a single, bereaved father. she tells you that they’d found each other when they needed the other the most.

and you don’t particularly know why you’re so nervous when ellie finally takes the exit off the interstate and you guys make your way through the suburbs. perhaps it’s the domesticity of meeting her family, or that you’re over a hundred miles away from familiarity, but your fingers are trembling when she turns into the neighbourhood and cozy brick homes line the frost-laden streets.

she’s pulling up and parking on the curb in front of a warm two-story that has a blue pickup truck and a gold SUV in the driveway when she notices.

“hey, hey,” she whispers, noticing the way you’re wringing your hands to stop the shaking. “you okay?”

her hands are warm when they close over yours and her thumbs is brushing over your skin soothingly.

“i’m being dumb,” you admit.

ellie’s eyes are crystal clear under the setting sun.

“don’t say that,” she says softly. “you wanna take a second?”

you swallow and shake your head.

“no, we can go,” you assure her.

she’s searching your face for any tell, but when you offer her a soft smile, she’s leaning back in her seat and nodding. before she completely pulls away, you’re stopping her.

“thanks, ellie,” you say gently. “this was really kind of you.”

she flashes you an easy smile, squeezes your hand a final time before climbing out of the car and rounding the front to help you out.

and truthfully, you realize you were nervous for nothing. because when the door swings open to reveal an older man aged with smile lines and greying hair, ellie seemingly softens infinitely.

“hey, kiddo,” he greets, crushing her in a hug so tight, she’s spluttering out a laugh.

“joel, i can’t breathe,” she wheezes.

you’re standing there awkwardly, backpack slung over your shoulder when joel finally loosens his hold on ellie and glances over her head.

“who’s this?” he asks, but the smile he wears is knowing.

“________, my roommate,” she introduces quickly, cheeks warming an awful shade of red as she begs every force above that joel won’t blow her cover.

because, okay, maybe ellie’s talked about you on the phone way more times than she’d care to admit out loud. talked about how intimidating you were at first, then graduated to talking about how you were actually so cool. and maybe she’d brought up the fact that she thought you were pretty. like...super pretty. and that maybe she was crushing a teensy bit.

“nice to meet you,” joel replies simply, sparing ellie this time around.

you let go of the breath you hadn’t realized you were holding onto, offering a smile that makes ellie wonder if she’ll survive the week with you in such a new proximity.

“nice to meet you, too,” you almost whisper, relaxing as he reaches for the backpack slung over your shoulder.

“here, let me take this for you,” he says.

and it doesn’t take you long to realize where ellie gets it from. her kind spirit and fierce yet gentle heart. joel is soft-spoken, a little rough around the edges, but a warm energy that radiates through the home he’s made for himself and ellie.

it makes infinitely more sense enter tommy and maria, her uncle and aunt who tell you the silliest stories about the starry-eyed girl in her youth over dinner. who bring out her boisterous laughter when they sing old 80’s music over dishes and evening TV.

“your family’s so cool,” you say in awe, wrapped in one of her coats she’d dug out of the closet under the stairs.

you’re nursing a mug of hot chocolate that steams in the icy air of jackson on her back porch.

ellie breathes out a little laugh.

“they’re something,” she jokes, watching you over the rim of her mug.

you make her heart thud hard in her chest as she takes you in, bundled in pieces of her that make her think that she wouldn’t mind making you hers.

“i miss times like these,” you whisper.

ellie shifts closer, catching you by surprise when her thumb swipes over the curve of your top lip.

“sorry,” she hums quietly. “you had...uh...”

you let out a hollow laugh and shake your head, tell her that it’s fine as a silence blankets the two of you.

“i’m glad you like them,” ellie admits softly. “sometimes i get a little self-conscious because, y’know, everyone expects a nuclear family and...”

“i’d take this any day,” you assure her, and the true implication of your words is latent, but something hopeful pricks her tummy.

i’d take this any day...with you.

and locking eyes with you usually scares her, usually makes her queasy with nerves because there’s always something searing in your gaze, but it��s like you see each other for the first time, no barriers.

ellie’s so close she can feel the warmth of your body coiling and drawing her in. her breath’s caught in her throat as she chances a glance at your mouth and her own lips begin to tingle.

she’s on the brink of asking if she can kiss you, but the back door is sliding open and two familiar faces are surfacing.

“williams!”

ellie’s daze melts away as she shifts to put distance between the two of you at the arrival of her friends.

“jess!” she calls. “dina!”

the moment clings heavy, but ellie writes it off. maybe she’s jumping the gun, reading too much into tender moments. it’s colored on your face, though, as she stands to meet her friends halfway, that the two of you are tethered and you feel it too.

ellie’s friends are another reflection of her character. they take you under their wings in the days leading up to the holiday with jesse teaching you to ride his minibike and dina telling you stories of their childhood while excitedly painting your nails pretty shades of autumnal colors because both jesse and ellie vehemently decline.

joel graciously relinquishes his kitchen to the four of you the day before thanksgiving. lets you guys gather around and bake an array of different desserts for tomorrow’s dinner over a few beers and winecoolers.

perhaps ellie’s a lightweight, you come to find, when she’s a lot more giggly and rosy-cheeked than she’d ever let anyone see. she’s feeling a little bubbly and you definitely don’t help the fact when you gaze upon her so fondly as you smear away the streaks of flour across her cheek.

jesse and dina are merely observers, watching with knowing grins as ellie practically melts against your touch.

and as the desserts cool on the kitchen island and the two of see jesse and dina out, ellie can’t keep her hazy eyes off of you. the two of you vote on a movie and she’s taking her usual seat in the right corner of the couch. it starts out with the two of you on opposite ends, but as the film plays, the space between you and ellie diminishes and she swears you can hear the way her heart’s pounding behind her ribcage with your ear pressed to her chest.

it’s uncharted territory considering ellie’s never been big on physical touch and she can’t even be sure that there's anything there, but you have to know. ellie’d mentioned past girlfriends, wasn’t really subtle when it came to wandering eyes on campus, hell, she’d even—

suddenly your arm’s tightening around the narrow of her waist and you’re nestling impossibly closer and christ, ellie can’t help herself when the coarse pads of her fingertips brush your jaw to catch your attention.

your gaze is illuminated by pixels and there’s a hitch in your breathing as you search her features for any hesitation. it’s long gone, you find, when ellie’s mouth is slotting yours, lips warm and tongue still flavored with sparkling wine.

ellie kisses like you’re air and she needs you to breathe. it’s almost embarrassing, way her body reacts to your proximity, how hot she us under the collar and achey as you move to straddle her. her fingertips are skimming down your spine, past the small of your back to take a—

your teeth sinking in the plump of her bottom lip and the way your soft palms find purchase against the rigid expanse of her tattooed abdomen is sobering. has her bony fingers cupping the flesh of your jaw.

“wait, wait,” she whispers, chest heaving and breaths shallow as she looks up at you.

the dust is starting to settle and you take in ellie’s kiss-bitten lips, swollen and slick. her pupils are blown wide, sweater riding up to reveal reddened flesh like you’ve branded her. you lean back.

“fuck,” you whisper. “fuck, i’m so sorry.”

ellie’s mouth is drying.

“why are you sorry?” she whispers.

you seem to chew on your words, eyes teary and expression scared.

“why are you sorry?” ellie repeats, not caring enough to mask the hitch in her voice as she pries.

“you’re always so fucking good to me, ellie,” you whimper. “you’re a great roommate and an even better friend and—”

ellie blows out a deep sigh, falls slack against the cushions as she levels you with an indiscernible look in her eye.

“don’t do that,” she breathes.

“ellie.”

“c’mon, you know me better than that,” she says, tone tinged with annoyance. “you don’t have to let me down easy. you can be honest.”

and color you confused because how couldn’t she fathom that you’ve fallen and head first at that? she’s reading it all wrong, you realize, when defeat shutters over her pretty face.

“i—”

the floorboards outside the den creak and ellie’s pushing you off just as the door squeaks open to reveal joel’s aging face.

he reads the room a moment, decides to blow by the sheen in your eyes and ellie’s rigid posture.

“tommy and maria are leaving, kiddo,” he says. “if you wanna say bye.”

ellie nods, stands and leaves you in the television-illuminated room.

you realize she won’t come back for you when the telltale sound of the front door closes and the stairs seem to groan under her weight.

it’s half past two in the morning when you slip from the den, glass of water condensating on a coaster as you try to collect yourself on the screened-in deck out back.

the icy chill stings your lungs, makes you gulp in breath after breath. the night’s starting to dawn you, the gravity of the situation overwhelming you enough to choke.

“fuck,” you whisper, that familiar feeling of dread squeezing your chest.

meanwhile, ellie can’t sleep. has been staring at the ceiling of her childhood bedroom for the past two and a half hours. you’re all she can think of. pliant curves of your body settling over hers to fit like you two were made for each other, the smell of your subtle perfume, the taste of your mouth.

and she wants to be annoyed, angry at the fact, but she’d brought you all the way here, extricated you from your comfort zone and showed you parts of her she wouldn’t dream of revealing to anyone else.

she recalls the resignation in your tone on the drive up, how you’d divulged the dysfunction of your family and the troubles you carried with you as a result. it’d be your first holiday with someone other than yourself for a while and she’d be damned if it soured because she couldn’t push her feelings aside.

the tv’s off and the blanket’s folded when she musters up enough courage to enter the den again, heart sinking to her ass when she slides back into the kitchen and finds that the sliding door to the back deck is cracked ever so slightly.

she’s seen you in a lot of ways these past eleven-odd months she’s known you, but she’s never seen you like this, hands over your heart and chest heaving like you’re trying to ground yourself.

when your watery gaze swings to her, ellie’s melting, cushion sinking as she settles next to you.

“sorry,” you whisper shakily. “i don’t—”

ellie’s shifting to face you, arms winding around your shoulders as one hand comes up to cradle the back of your head.

“let’s talk about it later,” ellie offers softly. “we can just go to bed for now and—”

“i really, really like you, ellie,” you say in one breath, and it has her body locking up, the audible catch of her inhale sounding near your ear.

“but?”

“no buts,” you admit. “just that i don’t want you to think that i kissed you because you’re being nice to me. well, i guess you’re always nice to me. it’s one of the reasons why i…”

and ellie doesn’t mean to tune you out, but you’re so fucking cute and so sweet and she shouldn’t have doubted you or herself because you’re hiccuping and shivering and—

you taste better the second time around. now ellie’s a little less unsure, still a little nervous because you’re the first girl to make her feel like this and she doesn’t want the bubble she’s built around the two of you in this corner of her little world to burst, but kissing you feels so right.

she’s dragging you back inside, past the den and up the stairs, and maybe the two of you do things you shouldn’t in her twin size bed in her childhood room when her dad’s only a few walls away, but she can’t help herself. not when you’ve always been an arm’s length away and she can finally have you.

it isn’t until the two of you lay under the dim glimmer of the glow-in-the dark stars pasted to her ceiling, her face pressed in your neck, that she says it.

“i really, really like you, too,” she whispers. “i realized i didn’t say it back.”

but it’s not like she needs to. you knew that already.

neng ©️2023

[cupidbedsy]

𝗵𝗼𝗺𝗲 | 𝘩𝘶𝘨𝘩𝘦𝘴 𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴 ♔

➪ summary: afer many milestones of her brothers, she finally comes home for the first hughesbowl

➪ warnings: none (surprises?)

➪ word count: 2.6k

➪ file type: fic + one insta post

➪ sunny's notes: i'm pretty sure this was the first hughes bros fic i wrote so i definitely had to go back and rewrite a bunch of it. for a little context you're a famous youtube vlogger :) also i would definitely reread this one because a lot has changed and i wrote like a thousand more words for this one

© cupidbedsy (sunflower-lilac42) ; do not copy, repost, or translate my work and designs on any other website or here

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⟹ Sunday, December 3, 2023 @ 3:30 in the morning - Naples, Italy

“Hello everyone, my name is y/n, and welcome to my channel if you are new here and welcome back if you’re not! It is currently,” She pauses to take a brief look at her watch, “3:30 in the morning on Sunday, December 3. I am very much still in Italy, but not for long.”

The video cuts and now her camera is sitting on her desk, the windows are opened and the lights are adjusted to be a little bit brighter. She smiles brightly at the camera before she starts talking again, “So you’re probably seeing this mid-December ish whcih means you kind of already know what is going on, but. I am officially flying and moving back home.

“Italy has been such a great experience and I’ve had so much fun here, I’ve learned a ton of new things and I am so grateful for everyone I’ve met. If you know, I’ve been here for almost three years now and I think I’m starting to realize how homesick I am. It’s super nice and amazing here but if I’m honest, I kind of miss ‘the land of the free’. That was a joke, the land of the free part, trust.”

She laughs and continues, “Anyway, the main reason I have decided to come home now is because of my brothers. If you also don’t know, I have three younger brothers, Quinn, Jack, and Luke who are professional hockey players. Quinn plays for the Vancouver Canucks and the other two play for the New Jersey Devils. I honestly have missed so much of their careers, Luke especially and I just really want to be there for the first ever ‘Hughesbowl’ I think they’re calling it.” 

She wipes her eyes, trying not to let the tears fall. She looks around at her room and then back at the camera, “So, I’m flying into New York this morning, my flight leaves at 7 so I should probably get going in a little bit. But yeah, I’ll see you guys when I touch down in New York!”

Videos play of y/n getting ready for the airport, all of her luggage behind her. She navigates her way through the airport, stopping to get some food at the Starbucks and a small drink before sitting and reading her book. After the montage, she is now in a car looking a little tired but her smile is still plastered on her face. 

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

⟹ Sunday, December 3, 2023 @ 10:21 in the morning - New York City, New York

“So as you can see, I am now in New York!” The camera pans to a girl in the driver's seat, “This is my American homie right here. Oh, it’s so weird being back, everyone still can’t walk and drive to save their lives.

“Anyway, Julia and I are heading to drop my stuff off at her place and then we’re going to go get some brunch, I think? We’ll, or I guess, I will go sightseeing. I leave for Vancouver tomorrow night so I can rest up before the shorter flight. It’s honestly, kind of fun being back home, everything is kind of like how I remembered. I might also break into Jack and Luke’s apartment to steal some Devils merch so I can wear it to the game, but yeah.”

“Do the boys know you’re going?” Julia asks, pulling into the parking lot of her apartment complex.

Y/n shakes her head, “Nobody knows except for you and Tiffany, my friend who lives in Vancouver. So that will be an additional bonus to the game. I’ve set up some things with the arena and I guess, actually, some of the team know so Brock, Petey. I think Jesper and Nico know too, we were talking a little bit earlier together when I got here. Alright, I will see you guys sometime soon!”

Another quick montage plays, Julia and y/n are out and about, going from store to store while y/n gapes at all the things she remembered about visiting Jack before she left. At one point, there was a video of her successfully sneaking into her brother's apartment and stealing one of their beanies they kept on the countertop. 

The next video was of her collapsing onto a bed, “We’re home! It is now almost 10 o'clock here and I am going to get some much-needed rest. Tomorrow I think we’re going to meet up with a few more of our friends which I don’t think I’m going to vlog. Which means, I will see you all when I am headed to the airport!”

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

⟹ Monday, December 4, 2023 @ 7:00 in the evening - John F Kennedy Airport

“It was already 5 and I am here at the airport,” Y/n pans the camera around before focusing it back on herself, “I am actually starting to get so nervous about this. I mean in a little over 24 hours I get to see my little brothers for the first time in almost 3 years. Wow, that is crazy to say. I ended up going out to an early dinner with some of my friends so I am definitely full for this plane ride. I am going to be landing in Vancouver around 10, basically, I’m going to be falling asleep when I get there.

“I also finished this book which will be in a different video but it was so good and I’m so glad I got to read it. I’m rambling too much, I will see you guys in Canada.”

Footage of the plane played, looking down at the ground below. In the middle of those clips, were videos of y/n either trying not to fall asleep and also her reading. Then, clips of her dragging her luggage through the airport and out the doors to find her friend's car. 

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

⟹ Monday, December 4, 2023 @ 10:13 in the night - Vancouver, British Columbia, Canada

“Oof! It is nearing my bedtime. Also, Tiffany just mentioned to me how weird it looks that I’m coming all the way from Italy with just a suitcase and carry-on. Don’t worry, I didn’t leave my stuff in Italy. I shipped most of my things here to Vancouver because I’m planning on living with Tif over here for a while until I can afford my place. And who knows, maybe Quinn will kidnap me and force me to come live with him.

“That is completely beside the point there. I have now been in three different countries and two different continents in basically 24 hours theoretically if we look at it from completely one time zone, Pacific. I’m going to cry actually, whether that is because of exhaustion or because I get to see my brothers in less than 20 hours, I don’t know. I will see you guys tomorrow, probably somewhere close to the time I leave for Rogers Arena. Tomorrow is the day.”

The video ends with her sighing with a smile on her face, both happy and nervous for the upcoming events to happen. She went to bed that night, comfortably in another bed instead of an airplane seat once more. Tomorrow was going to be a lot and she could only hope everything went to plan.

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

⟹ Tuesday, December 5, 2023 @ 6:23 in the evening - Rogers Arena

“I am now standing outside of Rogers Arena on this very cold day in Vancouver. I am really wishing I brought another coat, somehow I still have not trained my body to be adaptive in the cold.” She rolls her eyes but smiles nonetheless, “We’re going to go meet with some of the people who are helping me pull this off and if everything works out you should be seeing the video Tiffany is taking from behind me mashed with another video my friend is taking from the stands.”

『••✎••』

Y/n stands nervously in the tunnel, playing with her fingers and picking at the skin around her nails. She bounced slightly on the balls of her feet as she listened to the skating come to a halt. It was like her eyes were trained to find her family no matter where she was or where they were. As soon as everyone stopped and got into their lines, she let out a deep breath when her eyes focused on Quinn standing alongside the others. 

His hair was longer, that was for sure. He looked older, more mature than the last time she had seen them. The last time she had actually talked to them was a few days prior, probably about a week ago. She had texted them a few times but other than that, she was too nervous she would accidentally slip up and tell them about her plan. 

Her eyes moved and they zeroed in on Jack who was conveniently also standing next to Luke. Her eyes widened a bit when she saw Luke, he was taller, much taller than she remembered. Jack almost looked the same in her opinion, the only thing different was his hairstyle but even then, he looked like the younger brother who used to pester her when she wouldn’t make his Mac ‘n Cheese the way he wanted her to. 

On the other hand, the boys were standing, looking at the ground while their feet shuffled back and forth to help keep them steady on the ice. Jack and Luke shoved each other once or twice playfully throughout the opening speeches. Quinn had a million thoughts racing through his head. This would be his first time playing against Luke on big league ice, his first time playing his brothers as captain of his team, the first time they would all be playing together in the NHL on the same ice and she wasn’t here. 

He would never hate or relent his older sister for wanting to go off and study in another country, it was an amazing opportunity. He was, however, upset about everything that she had missed of his. Luke’s draft, Luke’s debut, Luke’s first goal, the start of Luke’s rookie season, Jack’s record-breaking season, him being announced captain, his first game as captain. 

While Jack and Luke weren’t thinking about this, Quinn couldn’t help it. Y/n was his big sister, the person he had looked up to for his whole life, the person who took care of him when he took a big hit on the ice, the person who helped him through his first relationship, the person who made him soup when he was sick. She was practically everything to him. And it hurt that she wasn’t here. 

“This isn’t something we normally do, but we figured since it was a special occasion we would make an exception.”

Everyone in the arena had practically gone quiet at the words, no one knew anything extra was happening tonight. A lot of friends looked at each other in confusion, the teams eyed one another - some knowling and some just as confused as the fans -, y/n got even more nervous as the words she had drilled into her head were spoken out loud. 

“As everyone knows, this is an incredible thing happening tonight, three brothers playing against each other.” The said boys rolled their eyes once more but still had smiles on their faces, “We do know that there is one person missing however.”

Many fans of y/n who happened to be in the audience knew almost exactly what was happening at this moment. While she hadn’t hinted at coming back home, who else would they have been talking about? She was the only Hughes in question who wasn’t here. 

“As she told me when she got here, she couldn’t miss another big milestone for her brothers. So after being away in Italy for 3 years, please welcome famous YouTuber and older sister of Quinn, Jack, and Luke Hughes, y/n Hughes!”

Cheers erupted as she stepped out onto the ice and she waved a little to the fans before being almost knocked to the ground by a body tackling her. Luke’s arms wrapped around his sister tightly, his head resting on hers. She smiled softly and wrapped her arms around him as well, “Hi Lukey.”

His voice was soft, “Hi.”

“When’d you get so tall?”

“I’ve always been tall, you’re just short.” He pulled away, his hands resting on her shoulders as he looked at her. His eyes slightly glistened with tears before he pulled her into another hug. He murmured something at first, causing y/n to have to ask him to repeat it, “I’m really really really really really happy you’re here. I don’t think I could’ve gone another six months without you.”

She frowned and squeezed him a little tired before he ultimately pulled away and let Jack scoop her into a hug as well. Compared to Luke’s, Jack’s hug was relatively short because he was now antsy. This would be the first time in years that he would be playing in front of her and he wanted to make her proud. So when he pulled away about a minute later she looked at him confused. He only smiled at her before speaking, “I got the zoomies now.”

She threw her head back as she laughed, shaking her head at him. Her eyes moved round once more to see Quinn standing a foot or two away from her. When she opened her arms, he all but dove into them like Luke had done earlier. He, however, shed a few tears as his head buried into the shoulder. She patted his back and suddenly she realized how many eyes were actually on them. So while she wanted to continue her reunion with the three of them, she whispered something into his ear and he pulled away nodding. 

She waved one more time at the fans as the applause and made her way to the stands where her parents were. Once she was even slightly near her parents, Ellen pulled her into a hug, asking her a bunch of questions about when and how she got there. 

『••✎••』

After the game, y/n stood with Jim and Ellen as they waited for the boys to be done. She was in the middle of catching them up on her trip here when someone came from behind and hugged her tightly, slightly lifting her up. She squealed and turned around to hit Jack on the arm, “Hey!”

“What?” He said innocently as he threw an arm around her shoulder, “Can I not hug my sister who I haven’t seen in three years?”

“Of course you can.” She wrapped her arms around his torso and side-hugged him, “You just can’t pick me up.”

He scoffed a little, “Someone’s picky.”

“Where’s Luke and Quinn?”

He shrugged, “I don’t know. I was too excited to see you.”

At that moment, Luke and Quinn made their appearance right behind Jack and hit him over the head. Y/n rolled her eyes before hugging each of them, Quinn’s being a little longer than Luke’s. They all stared at each other once they stopped hugging and then they looked at their parents. 

“Can we go get dinner?” Jack asked.

She rolled her eyes, “Only if you’re paying rich boy.”

He shrugged before walking ahead of them. Y/n looped her arms through Quinn and Luke’s, walking down the hallway out of the arena, “Ah my favorite boys.”

“I heard that!”

❛ ━━･❪ ❁ ❫ ･━━ ❜

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[tan1shere]

Motel Whore

Ellie Williams x female reader !

A/n: ahh you guys after awhile its finally hereeee. Sorry for the wait life's been hectic and I'm not doing the best right now :( going through a pretty difficult breakup that's quite honestly tearing me apart but I hope you guys enjoy this!

Summary: You and Ellie started a fwb. But you want more. She doesn't see that nor notice how you've been acting. You're just her. Motel Whore. (Yes this is based off of the song Motel Whore by Nessa Barrett!)

Warnings: smut, angst, just sadness. Ellies a bit of an ass. Jealousy, slightly rapey Ellie if ya squint. We won't pay attention to that cuz we all know she's a sweetheart and wouldn't do that. Suggestive language. Like always MDNI

Masterlist

Pt 2!

It was just one night. Turning into two. Turning into a week. Months. Almost a year and you still don't know how you're here. Doing this with your friend Ellie. You always thought it'd be easy, the whole friend's with benefits thing, just a simple fuck then leave. You had no feelings for eachother. Wrong. It was the complete opposite. You started getting more attached as the weeks went by. But you had agreed to her request. 'No feelings involved' and 'this isn't a forever thing' you and Ellie were both single.

And you had agreed that it was a good idea to do this until you could fill that void. On the first night you two had slept together you had told her you were sick of being lonely and having to get off by yourself. You said it mindlessly just ranting to a friend. Until she came up with the idea. You were getting in too deep and you had no idea what to do about it.

You were currently at your friends, Dinas. To be exact. A mutual friend of you and Ellie. She had no idea about your secret life with her, no one did for that matter. It was hush hush. That was another agreement that you both made at the start. But secretly. You wanted the whole world to know. Why? You honestly couldn't even answer that. Because, you had no clue yourself.

"Hello, earth to Y/n. I'm talking to you babe." She blurts out, snapping you out of your thoughts. "Oh yeah, sorry." You mumble. "What's up, you seem off." You shake your head. "Nothing, I'm fine." You give her a reassuring smile. But knowing how Dina was she didn't buy it one bit. She was going to pry, but knowing you'd tell her eventually she let's it go.

"Right well, I asked if you wanted to go out for dinner on Saturday." You look straight at her. Fuck, you were suppose to be meeting Ellie. You always did on a Saturday. Or whenever one of you needed a good fuck. "Uhmm, can we make it Friday?" You try to negotiate. She furrows her brows. "I'm going out with Jesse on Friday, he has a date planned." You flop on the bed. "You guys are so cute." She laughs at the pout on your lips. "You'll find it. Trust me. It may even be close you never know." You scoff. "Doubt it." She then thinks for a moment. "Sunday could work?" You smile at her. "Sounds like a plan."

It was now Saturday you were just driving to the motel of this time. Ellie would always text you the address of some crappy motel. It was never the same one, but if it was it would've been months since you went. Where you lived there was a shit ton of em around. So you rarely ever had to visit them twice. You get out of your car and go up to the number she texted you. "Room 147." You speak, going to knock on it, guessing she's already there.

She opens it welcoming you in. You follow, immediately being kissed by her, she was desperate, and honestly so were you. You always can't wait to see her on your planned days, even when they aren't you can't wait to be by her. "God I missed you." You let out a giggle. "It was only 2 days ago since we last did this Ellie." You smile at her as she takes her hoodie off. "Yeah. 2 days too long." She continues to kiss you. Making you let out a soft sigh into her mouth. "I want to ruin you angel." She'd always call you that during these moments.

You were quite different from most of your friends, you would dress with whites, baby pinks, golds, just any baby color really. You weren't super girly and childish but you had this aura about you that was ethereal. Honestly angelic. Ellie fed on that. She was the complete opposite. She loved fucking you senseless, ripping you apart so to speak. She adored how soft you were. Although you weren't completely innocent. This was the most you've done with any body. You always would do stuff to yourself. But what Ellie didn't know. Was she was your first.

"Ruin me Els.. please." You needed it. You craved it. And she loved that. She loved having you completely under her control. She moves her incredibly soft lips against your neck, putting your hands in her hair gently tugging at her locks, making her groan against your skin. She leads you to the bed getting ontop of you, starting to move down your now naked body. You were panting, it was getting hotter in the room. Both of your bodies radiating heat, making both of you going mental for one another. "Gunna dick you down sweetheart." And she did, just that.

It was now after and like always she was getting dressed immediately. You were always left sitting there, feeling sorry for yourself. "I've been meeting up with some other girls that I've met recently for a quick fuck and I'm meeting one of them right now." She states as she puts her jeans back on. You felt something brew in your stomach. Was it jealousy, disgust? "Oh, I see, well have fun." She grabs her keys. "If you can't be bothered going home, I booked this room out for the night so you can just stay here if you'd like." You look at the bed sheets contemplating your whole life right now. "Right." She then leaves not uttering another word.

Room 147.

Just for the night.

Said I was heaven.

That's without saying goodbye.

It was now a Wednesday. You had been in your apartment just tidying up a bit you could not stop the thought of Ellie. It was intoxicating. And you couldn't quite tell if that was a bad or good thing. You tried to take your mind off of it, but this was all slowly getting to you. You knew what you signed up for. But at the same time it's like she's doing it on purpose. You needed your brain to just shut up for a quick second. Then you got a stupid. Stupid idea. Thinking itd help.

You shook your head. It shouldn't hurt the way it does. You're not even dating her. But oh how it did. The image of her tattooed hand rubbing up some other girls thigh. It made you want to physically puke. But you needed to stop that feeling. You were both single. You had no rule over her. Which meant neither did she. Maybe you should go out more find someone else. You just shake your head again, waiting to see how later pans out.

Later came round slow. You'd been feeling off all day. You don't know why this would make you feel better because honestly you always felt like shit afterwards. You felt used. Even if you wanted this it just felt worthless, were you wasting your time? Should you just call it quits before it's too late. What if it is too late. You were already at the said motel, sitting on the bed waiting. She then comes through the door, looking like she's in a rush. You furrow your brows at her. "Sorry stayed a bit longer." You just nod. Knowing it was one of the girls she's been doing it with alongside you. "You alright love?" She asks as she takes off her jeans. It felt wrong. This all felt so wrong.

You lie. "Yeah I'm good. Just really bored Els. Needed you." What are you doing. Why hurt yourself like this. She smirks, getting on the bed with you. "Yeah baby? How badly hm." She leans closer to your face inches away. Leaning down to kiss you, you relish in it. She begins taking your clothes off, leaving you in your specifically picked out lingerie. It was red, with lace, and silk. You'd hope that maybe this will get her to notice you as something more. See you in something as special. But oh boy were you. Wrong. Making you feel even more stupid as she takes it off, no comment, no nothing. You felt cold. And not because of the fact you were naked. You felt icy, inside and out. You felt that pukey feeling again.

And just like everytime you two fuck, she was up and about to leave again. "So uhm where are you going?" You ask, knowing the answer but still asking regardless. "One of the other girls." You nod. "Do any of them know about me?" She looks up at you, your figure still on the bed. "No. No one knows about this. And that's what we agreed on right?" You nod, looking at her. "Have fun." Your response was cold. Cold like your body.

Am I just a secret.

You love to hide.

Turn off your location when, you come over late at night.

You were currently out with Dina, doing your usual girly shopping, trying on all sorts of clothes and shoes. "Hey what do you think of these pumps?" She asks. You nod. "Suit you." You say bluntly. You don't particularly like the mood you've acquired over the last few months, but you had yourself to blame for that one. "Ok what is up your ass girl. And you are telling me this time." You sigh. "Nothing Dee I'm just not in a good place right now." You softens her look. "Please just talk to me. I'm worried about you babe." You hated that, you never ever wanted to worry. Or upset anyone, at all. "Promise to talk to you in future." You give her a smile. "You better." She winks at you.

"Right anyways, positive vibes. I saw this cute skirt that was definitely you. Wanna go try it on?" You nod smiling genuinely this time. You continued to do this, going around the stores when you got a text.

You absolutely hated yourself for getting into it. You should've stopped sooner but you just can't. And you still don't know why. You couldn't keep treating yourself like this it's time this ends.

You arrive at the motel that she mentioned. Knocking on the door, quickly getting tugged in. She's immediately kissing you, your lips, your neck. She slides her thumb over your bottom lip. You let out a breath. "Ellie-"

"Shhh. I need to fuck the shit out of you angel. Need it." You just nod, giving consent but not fully in the mood for this. You're so stupid. What is wrong with you, you're so blinded. She takes your clothes off, getting you to lay on the bed, but she thinks for a moment. "Uh uh, ass up." You look right at her. "Bu-" She flips you over, going to grope your ass, your face hiding in the pillow. She attached her strap, without any thought pushing into you rough. And hard. You let out a slight gasp.

"Fuck. I needed this." She mumbles, watching as it goes in and out of you. "Using you as I please." And for the first time in all of this mess, you felt tears, hot well needed tears. You're so thankful she couldn't see your face. But it truly hurt. Usually those words wouldn't get to you. But it's how you've been feeling. Used. Abused. In a mental way. It was hurting. Every little bit of it hurt. This feeling wasn't at all good, you just wanted it to be over. So. You faked your orgasm. And like always it ended with her leaving and not uttering a word. You were still faced down in the pillows pretending you were sleeping. Although you don't think it made much difference. You just couldn't look at her. Not with your makeup stained face. From the tears.

Check in check out.

One night stay, you're out the door.

You treat me, like a motel whore.

[myheadhurtscutely]

Star Stationary - Modern!Anakin Skywalker x Reader - Chp. 3

C ` Anakin Skywalker x Reader

Summary ` You heed ani's advice and try to go on the date with his friend, but you wind up on a whole other road, in someone else's car. Everything happens for a reason i guess?

!Warnings! Angst. But little fluffy bits here and there

wc ` 2k

notes ! this is closely based on characters, Jim and Pam, from a tv show, The Office.

Chapter one Chapter two

One date. That's all it was. One date.

You had called the number Anakin so kindly gifted you. The guy answered, and you swear you didn't even catch his name. Not that he didn't tell you. To be honest you just didn't care. Unless it was the blue-eyed boy you dream of every night. you. didn't. care.

The date rolled around. A cold and windy Sunday, not out of the norm lately. You weren't trying to impress this stranger you were soon to see, but it doesn't hurt to dress up a little. It made you feel cute. You also subconsciously knew that you were dressing up just in case. Always just in case. What if Anakin walked in to grab a coffee to go? What if you passed by him on the street as your head hung, listening to the breeze in one ear, and some jazz melody in the other. You knew it was crazy but it's what made each day kind of exciting.

After adjusting your hair pin just right, you slid on your gloves and headed out to the cold world. A good 10-minute drive to downtown, and you had arrived. You paid your parking meter and began to walk, passing small, and grand shops along the way. The air nipped your reddening nose, frost bit your cheeks, and a wind carried your beath to the next street. This was your first time around here since you moved. New sights and smells matted themselves into your memory. It was all so wonderful. Lusty dusk haze mixed with the hanging lights on restaurant patios, and led your path as you made it to the cafe.

Ring! The small bell chimed as you pushed the glass door open. Pastries and soups wafted into your nose, and some coffee names caught your eye. It was a nice place. A bit intimate for a first date, but you weren't one to be picky. A low lighting hung over about seven booths, covering the walls of the cafe. You looked for the man you were to be meeting. He said he had short, fading ginger/brown hair, and a beard. Wow. How descriptive. Luckily there was only three groups of people in the cafe. A group of teens, a couple, and a man with a beard at the booth closest to the door. Ah, there he is.

He wasn't bad looking by any means, a bit older but that didn't deter you. His eyes were downturned, and kind looking. To be honest, you looked for Anakin in him, but there was no resemblance.

"Hello? Are you here to meet someone?" Your voice was quiet to accommodate the deafening silence of the cafe. He smiled and nodded.

"Yes," His smiled beamed a bit too bright for you. It made you feel bad for how much your mind was not even willing to give this guy a chance. "are you..." his voice trailed, checking your identity.

You answered politely, giving the appropriate response. He stood up out of the booth. He was tall and had the most stereotypical dad bod. It worked for him. He was handsome, but not like Anakin. No one was like Anakin. He was in a league of his own entirely. The guy stuck out his hand, guiding you gently into the booth. You obliged and scooted into your side of the booth as he sat back down.

The silence was the worst thing you had endured in a while. It was painful. He was sweet but awkward.

"I must say you are stunning by the way. I'm sorry if that's too forward." You blush in response, no matter who from, a compliment was appreciated. You reassured and thanked him. Conversation begun to drag on, though you wouldn't call it 'conversation.' Much of it was one-sided. Not through any fault of his, the chemistry just wasn't there. None of your hobbies aligned with his. His humor wasn't one that made you laugh, but most of all,

he just wasn't Anakin.

You genuinely felt horrible for being unable to give him a try, despite his best efforts to connect with you. It was getting bright outside though, and you both knew the date was coming to an end.

After simple goodbyes to a stranger, you made your way out the door. No “i’ll call you later”s or “i had a nice time”s were said before you left, but that was ok. No reason to give a man false hope like that.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆─────

The rest of the weekend was spent with you rotting in your bed, shaming yourself for you continuing dreams of a future with Anakin. He nor his Padme deserved that.

Eventually ripping yourself from your disheveled sheets, you silenced your alarm clock and did your routine for the morning. You weren’t gonna be late at all, but you definitely didn’t plan on being early to work today. A simple white button down, a pencil skirt, and your trustworthy coat were sufficient for the day.

Packed and ready to go, you shut your car door and made your way to your office. On some backroad, a sputtering started. “Oh fuck.” You said breathily. You weren’t much of a car person, and now was not the time. You had left 15 minutes later than you normally would’ve and this was a bad setback. The car slowly slid to a stop, ignoring your foot on the gas pedal. On the side of the road now, in some grassy patch, you laid your head against the wheel and cried. It had all been too much lately, and now this.

Who would you even call? You have no friends or family around. You just moved here. In that moment isolation was the only fitting feeling.

Pulling out your phone you scrolled through contacts. Endlessly. Most of them being from back home so they were of no use to you. Then it hit you, the only other person near, that could be up and about at this hour. Anakin.

You hesitated before pressing his contact. What if he got upset with you for calling so early? What if you were bothering him. What if Padme answered. The thoughts swirled in your head like a rising storm, but you eventually pushed through and rang him.

ring…

ring…

ring…

You became nervous, and slightly embarrassed. Please please pick up. The cold surface flush against your cheek.

The dial tone stopped, and the phone crackled as Anakin's tired voice answered from the other side. "Hey Snickers," he yawned, "are you okay?" You wanted to squeal. After scolding yourself silently and quickly, you responded.

"Hey, im so so sorry for calling so early. I just didn't know who else to call. I was on my way to work, and my car broke down and and now I'm going to be late." Thats when the embarrassing sniffling started as you continued to ramble worries and apologies to his tired ears.

"Hey hey hey, calm down it's gonna be okay, stay there. Can you send me your location?" You mumbled a 'Mhm". "Great, thank you sweetheart, I'll be there soon." Mummbling a goodbye, you removed your phone from your red-hot ear. 'Sweetheart' was he feeling ok?

A few minutes after the location was sent, a black car rolled up to the front of yours. Anakin popped out of it, sending a smile and wave your way. His hair was still untamed from his haste to get to you, but he still had on his buttoned shirt and his usual work pants. You smiled back, and the two of you came to meet in the middle.

"Hey, you ok?" He asked, gently rubbing your shoulders.

"Yeah" You shrugged into his warm hands. "It just like, crapped out on me I guess. I really can't be late Anakin." He seemed to stare at the car and back at you, then the car again.

"Hmm, how about you let me take you to work today and then we can worry about this later?" He gave a sideways smile while blowing a stray curl out of his eyes.

You sighed and smiled at him, "I really don't want to impo-"

"Stop. I offered; you could never be an imposition to me." His hands found their way to your shoulders again, as if he was holding you to the ground to keep you from floating away.

"Ok but I'm giving you gas money." Anakin laughed in your face, guiding you over to the passenger door and opening it politely.

"I'm a big boy, don't worry about it sweetheart."

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆─────

The ride was relatively quite, with Anakin’s music playing in the background. “So” he had opened the room for air, “how’d your date go?”

Your body tightened up. You didn't want him to know, it was embarrassing. Plus, maybe pretending you were fulfilled relationship wise, would help get Anakin out of your head. "It was alright." You tripped over your words, as if your mouth was running a race, trying to speed through the sentence as fast as you could.

Quickly shifting the ball to his court, you prompted your own question. "What about you and your girl?" Anakin pursed his lips. His beautiful brows furrowed, and you suddenly got a feeling of guilt for contorting his poor face.

"My girl? Oh, Padme?"

"Yeah."

"So-so." He waved his hand in the air in a tilting motion showing half-and-half whilst laughing. You laughed along with him, trying to include yourself in whatever odd conversation you had just conjured in the cold car. "Can I be honest?"

"Of course, Anakin." You could've sworn his eyes fluttered at the mention of his name falling from your lips.

"I've been living with one of my buddies for about 2 weeks now..." Anakin turned his head ashamedly. "Her and I just were too different, and things got heated, and... I don't know. It's like I just realized we weren't in love anymore. So did she."

The car was now in park. It was still dawn outside and both you and Anakin sat in silence for a short while. "I'm um, I'm so sorry Anakin." Your heart really did hurt for him, but there was also a gnawing voice, condemning you for feeling a twinge of poor hope in your heart at the new turn of events.

"It's okay, it had been coming for a while." He sighed and looked over to you, "you kinda set it in motion." He laughed. Your eyes widened in horror and surprise.

"Huh? What do you mean?" Anakin smiled that goofy godforsaken smile at you, pushing up his glasses.

"She had begun to get jealous of you after she saw your purple pen in my pocket, and rightfully so I guess." He looked back down at the floorboard in the car. You cocked your head to the side, giving him a questioning, intense stare.

He looked at you, his eyes half-lidded for a moment, "You're beautiful, and smart, and funny. Hell, if I was a girl I'd be jealous too."

Your face flushed and your lips curled into an unwanted smile, revealing your emotions at your very surface. "Oh, shut up." Was your only comeback. I mean what were you supposed to say? Your heart was slamming into your chest as if was begging to get out and lie next to his.

"Wow," He clasped his hand over his heart dramatically, "I'm so hurt."

"Oh no! Whatever shall I do!?" You jest back, the air now seeming lighter. The both of you just smiled and laughed at each other. "C'mon goof or were gonna be late."

You both open your respective doors, but not without Anakin rushing to your passenger side to help you carry your things inside. It was picturesque the way both of your silhouettes playfully knocked into one and other on the way to the entrance of The Office.

An; IM SO SORRY PLEAVE FORGIVE MY SINS ITS BEEN FOUR MONTHS SINCE I UPDATED THIS SERIES. Im getting back on the grind tho i swear. Seriously thoguh, i really appreciate the support on this series and couldnt be more thankful :)

tags ` @darthgloris , @queenie-official , @bby-imasociopath , @mxltifxnd0m , @jayrami3 , @robertsmithclone , @brainscabs , @bimbo-baggins86 , @t8lzw, @nxck-bxtch, @ddarling-ddearest-ddead, @signmethefuckupmhmm

(<3)

[sturniozo]

Our Lips Are Sealed VI

Masterlist

The car ride home was silent. My dad had decided very early in the morning to wake me up and take me home. The sun was barely even coming up when I was dragged out of bed. I guess my dad decided he just couldn’t wait to get me out of the house. He just couldn’t wait to get rid of me for good.

I keep staring out the window during the silent drive. I wonder if Nate or my mom are even awake right now. Honestly, it wouldn’t surprise me if Nate hasn’t even gone to sleep yet. He probably spent the whole night staying up and playing Fortnite with Matt and Nick.

Chris had stayed up almost all night with me. He stayed on the phone with me until we both fell asleep, something we used to do all the time. Chris and I had spent almost every night on the phone together almost two years ago, but I had stopped it from happening again once I had realized my feelings for him.

I hadn’t noticed when my dad had pulled into the driveway. He snapped me out of my thoughts by shouting.

“We’re here, did you not fucking notice?” He says loudly. I flinch slightly.

“Sorry, dad, I was just a bit tired.” I mumble and open the door to get out.

“I’m tired too, you think I wanted to get up at the crack of dawn to take your ass home?” My dad says spitefully.

“I didn;t ask you to, I was supposed to stay until Sunday night.” I tell him.

“Well last night you couldn’t wait to go home!” He shouts.

“I didn’t want to go!” Tears fill my eyes. “You never listen to me.” I step out of the truck.

“You were a lot easier to listen to when you were five and all it took was a doll to make you happy. Now I can never make you happy, no matter how hard I try. You’re just like your mother!”

I slam the door of my dad’s truck loudly and make my way to the front door of my house. I see the light from Nate’s room turn on from the upstairs window. His shadow makes its way to pull the curtain where he sees me walking to the door. He quickly moves away from the window and leaves his room. He makes it to the front door as I do, indicating he ran to the door.

“Is everything alright?” Nate asks as he watches my dad pull out of the driveway.

I just nod, hiding my face so he doesn’t see my tears. Nate wraps his arm around my shoulders and pulls me inside with him, closing the door behind us. We sit down on the couch and I finally look at Nate. His face softens as he sees my tear stained face.

“Tell me what happened?” Nate asks.

I take a deep breath to calm myself down as I begin to tell Nate everything that happened. Everything that happened with my dad over the weekend, or just the one night I spent there. Once I had finished explaining everything Nate pulled me in for a hug.

Nate’s always been a good brother. A nice brother that I could always count on when I needed anything. “Everything will be okay.” He mumbles against my shoulder as we hug. I pull away and wipe off my face. “It’s okay, hey, it's okay.” Nate repeats. “Do you need anything?”

“No,” I say. “I’m fine, really. I wasn’t going to go back anyways.” I shrug it off.

“Yeah, but you still like your dad, at least a little bit.” Nate laughs softly.

“You never talk to your dad anymore. It’s been like, what, two years?” I snort.

Nate scoffs. “My dad is a piece of work.”

“Piece of shit’s more like it.” I say, which causes Nate to laugh softly.

“Yeah, it is.” He smiles and leans back against the couch. “You never got to meet him and know just how true that is, though.”

I lean back against the couch with Nate. “No, but I got to hear you talk shit every time you came home.”

“Those stories were watered down versions.” Nate mumbles.

I sigh and close my eyes. “I didn’t mean to piss my dad off so bad.”

“I know.” Nate says. “Do you want breakfast?”

I shake my head. “Not really. I just want to go to sleep. Dad woke me up early.”

“Okay.” Nate mumbles.

I sit up from the couch and pick up my bag, going to walk up the stairs.

“I’ll wake you up in a few hours, when Nick, Matt, and Chris get here.” Nate says as he follows me up the stairs.

“Nick, Matt, and Chis are coming over?” I ask.

“Yeah, they were gonna spend the night here before we go camping for your birthday tomorrow.” Nate says, stopping at the door to his room.

“Well thats nice I guess.” I mumble as I stop at my door.

“What, you suddenly don’t like them?” Nate laughs.

“What? No, I love them like they’re my brothers.” I laugh.

“Good, because they are.” Nate leans against his door.

“What?” I ask.

“I- I don’t want you to see them as anything but your friends, brothers. Nothing more.” Nate says.

“I don’t, they’re just friends to me. Brothers.”

“Good.”

“Whats this about?” I ask.

Nate just sighs. “Nothing, just… Just get some sleep. You need it, you look like shit.”

I snort. “You’re one to talk.”

“Hey!” Nate laughs. “I’m always looking great.”

“You always look like shit.”

“That’s a lie.”

“Stinky boy.” I tease.

“Go to bed, before I tell Chris about your doll collection.” Nate crosses his arms.

“Good night!” I say with a laugh and open my door, walking into my room. I plop down onto my bed, tossing my bag onto the floor. I kick off my shoes and shimmy up to my pillows, snuggling against my stuffed animals. It doesn’t take me long to pass out.

I’m unsure of just how long it had been since I had fallen asleep, but I’m awoken by the weight of four nineteen year old boys doggy piling on top of me. Chris was at the bottom, right above me, supporting the weight of all of them so I wasn’t absolutly crushed to death.

“Jesus!” I wheeze out. “What’s wrong with you guys?”

Nate laughs from the top of the pile. “You would’t wake up.” He says.

“Yeah,” Chris chimes in. “ We thought this would wake you up.”

“What, killing me?” I wheeze out a laugh. “Get off me, before I become like that kid from the weird book we read in elementary school.”

Nate flops off the top of the pile, followed by Nick, and then Matt. Leaving Chris hovering over me.

“You too.” Nate says sternly.

Chris says nothing as he sits up and steps off my bed. I turn over to face the boys in my bedroom. “What time is it?” I ask.

“Almost noon.” Matt replies.

“Oh, so early.” I mumble and sit up.

“Yeah, extra early.” Nate sits on the bed ext to me. “Get some breakfast or something so we can start packing for the camping trip.”

I groan and lay back down. “Five more minutes.”

Chris takes my hands and pulls me back up. “You’ve had six hours.” He laughs.

“Come on,” Nick says. “We convinced your mom to let us start the camping trip a day early.”

“What?” I ask as I sit up straight.

“Yeah.” Chris smiles at me. “We’re leaving tonight.”

TAGS: @urfavpouge @savageking3 @tastesousweet @jko3005 @sturniolo0ntop @dwalk41202 @stvrnise @iloveneilperry @luvmxtt @blueeyedbesson @iloveurgf @mattswifr @that-chris-girl01 @sturniolho @remussbitch @chrisstankyleg @bernardenjoyer @sturniolosreads @mbbsgf @xxsadlovexx @whicked-hazlatwhore @sturnsgirl @keira324 @stuniolobbg @timmyscomputer @meg-sturniolo @sturnioloenthusiast @nickdevora @hearts4chris @carolinalikesthings @mattscokewhore @tillies33ssss @junnniiieee07

[daisyblog]

Chapter Four: Harry

Show Me Love Summary

Trigger warnings:  18+, anxiety, strong language, undiagnosed/struggling with learning difficulty. 

< Chapter 3

Harry

Even though it was a Sunday, it didn't stop my body from waking up early. It was like routine, every morning my eyes would open at 7am. Occasionally I'd let myself fall back to sleep for a lie in, but that was rare. 

Apart from our group outing to play mini golf on Friday, the weekend had been rather calm. The boys and I stayed in last night, ordered pizza and played a few games of Fifa. I hadn't heard from Evie much yesterday, but I knew her and the girls were having a girls night so I didn't want to disturb her too much. 

The flat was quiet this morning, which meant the others must have still been sleeping. Stretching my arms above my head, I debated whether to go for a run before I decide how to spend my day. Tip toeing out of my room, my shorts hung short on my lower hips, I could see Niall walking down the corridor from his own room. 

"Styles!" He greeted as he walked towards the kitchen, ruffling his hair out of his eyes. 

"G'morning". My feet followed him, going straight to the fridge to prepare my protein shake for after my morning run. "Fancy a run?".

Niall thought about it, nibbling at his bottom lip and his eyes squinting as he weighed up his decision. "Nah fuck that!".

I smiled to myself as my hands continued to add the power and milk into the shaker. "I'll be about half hour". I explained as I looked down at my phone to check the time. 

"How's Evie?". A wide smirk appeared on his face. Like he knew something I didn't. 

My shoulders shrugged as I shook my bottle, mixing the power and milk together, the noise filling the comfortable silence. "Good, I guess". 

"Taking her on another date anytime soon?". Niall wiggled his eyebrows in a playful manner making my smile appear, which made me curse at myself for showing some weakness in this moment. 

"It wasn't a date!". Was the only thing that I managed to say to defend myself, that sounded pathetic when I heard it. Niall sent me a look that screamed that he didn't believe a word that I just had said. "It wasn't!". 

"Evie thinks it was". He spoke with confidence, no stutter that would make me doubt him as he moved around the kitchen. 

I watched as he placed two pieces of bread in the toaster, before reaching for the butter out of the fridge. "She does?". 

"No but your face just told me that I'm right and you like her". I rolled my eyes at his effort to catch me off guard. Annoyed with myself for not being able to hide my feelings. "You two are driving me fucking crazy...why are you both holding back?". 

I swallowed thickly as I crossed my arms over my chest, and my shoulders shrugged as I thought carefully. "I've got a lot to lose if things didn't work out...I like the friendship I've got with Evie and I'm worried about losing her completely if we took a different path". 

Niall scratched at his nose as he stood opposite me, mirroring my stance. "But what if it would work out and you don't give it a chance?". I couldn't deny it, his words made sense and he was right because as the saying goes 'you'll never know unless you try'. Niall took my silence as a cue to continue. "At least think about it". 

I gently bit at my bottom lip as I nodded in response, not trusting myself to speak after the turn in conversation.

---

As my feet ran around the local area to the flat, my mind was distracted from the events of the last few weeks to this morning's conversation with Niall. 

I'd never had a serious relationship, sure I'd been on a few dates and drunken nights at a party while in high school and the beginning of university. But if I was relationship material was something I couldn't answer and if I was being honest with myself, that was a huge factor in why I was hesitant with taking things further with Evie. 

As I ran around the corner that took me back to the beginning of the street, my phone buzzed in my pocket making my legs slow me down to answer it. 

Mum.

"Hi Mum!". I naturally smiled as I saw my Mum's name flash up on the screen, despite not living too far away I still missed seeing her everyday. 

"Harry, how are you my boy?". Her voice was cheery, full of warmth and love. The type of love that was infectious and one you wish you could share with everyone. 

My pace had turned into small steps as I walked alongside the pavement, holding the small device against my ear. "I'm good Mum, missing you and Gem". 

"We miss you too darling...I was thinking maybe I could come visit in a few weeks, I'll make you and the boys a homemade meal". A smile filled my cheeks as I thought how happy Niall would be about that, he always said how much he missed his own Mums cooking. 

"We'd like that...especially Niall". I chuckled as I thought about it. "We don't always have time to cook a decent meal". 

I could hear some movement through the speaker as I assumed my Mum was moving around the house. "Well I won't have my boy and his friends hungry...and if there's anyone else you'd like to invite over I can cook for them too". 

I knew what she was hinting at, but as much as Mum meant nothing by her questioning towards my love life, it was something that I needed to figure out first before mentioning a name to her. 

My silence around the topic must have been enough for her to move on. "How's your classes going? You're doing so well and I'm really proud of you...but I want you to be happy too". 

"They're going well...more than well actually, I'm averaging an eighty and I absolutely love the modules and topics so I just need to keep up the work". Although I couldn't see her, I knew she was smiling on the other end of the phone. 

That was the thing about my Mum, as much as she was proud of me and Gemma getting good grades, that was just a bonus. Our happiness was more important than a grade to her. 

"You're a clever one...I'll give you that". Her smile could be heard through her tone. "Well I won't keep you talking for much longer because I'm sure you have plans ahead of you". 

"Thanks Mum, I'll speak to you later". I slowly began to say my goodbyes as I saw the flat building appear in front of me. "I love you". 

"Bye my love...I love you too darling". The call ended. 

---

Once I'd got back to the flat, I showered straight away to wash away the sweat from my morning run and replace my once damp clothing, with fresh ones. My light blue denim jeans, a basic white tee and my washed out white vans. 

As I exited my room and walked towards the shared living room, I was pleasantly surprised to see Evie standing there with Bella. Our outfits unintentionally matching, expect she wore a knitted beige cardigan over her white t shirt. 

Evie turned to face me as I approached the group, now realising that I was the only person missing from the gathering. Her smile did not go unnoticed and I felt my inner confidence feel flattered at the sight. 

"Nice of you to join us Harold!". Louis teased causing the others to notice my presence. My middle finger greeted him as he continued to joke at how long it took me to get ready. 

I found myself standing next to Evie by the entrance to the room as the others were trying to decide where we were going for lunch. "How was girls night?". 

Her smaller frame meant she had to look up to my taller presence. "Much needed...it was nice to have some girly talk and spend time with them". I watched as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear and her fingers found her necklace pendant again. 

"I'm glad you enjoyed...but I will admit I missed our chats". Her teeth immediately bit at her bottom lip, causing the shade to go a deeper shade of red. Her smile itching to break through. "Had to settle for conversations with these idiots". 

Evie stifled out a giggle at my teasing, knowing it was harmless banter towards the boys. "If it means anything then I missed our chats too". Our eyes shared a look, her blue and my green communicated silently. 

"What are you two whispering about?". Louis called us out to everyone, meaning all eyes turned to us. 

"How much fucking time you're wasting deciding where to eat...let's go to the local and have a Sunday roast". Evie quickly bit back and the mention of a roast dinner caused a loud appreciation from the others. 

Niall reached for his jacket from where it lay on the sofa. "This is why I love you Green...a Sunday roast is just what my belly needs!".

The local pub was only a short walk from us and Louis and Niall were even more impressed by the choice, as it meant they could have a beer with their lunch. Walking against the slight wind, made me appreciate that I'd grabbed my jacket just before we left as it sat on my shoulders. 

Evie and I walked together just behind the others. It was a comfortable silence as we listened to the others talking in front of us. As our legs guided us, I could feel our hands brush against each others occasionally as they dangled by our sides. 

I squeezed into the end booth seat next to Evie as she took a seat next to Lily. I felt Niall's stare burn into me but as much as I tried to ignore it, he continued until I looked his way. 

His smirk as his eyes flickered from me to Evie spoke for him. Luckily the others were too in grossed in what Bella was showing them on her phone to notice Niall making heart gestures with his hands.

"Oh we should have a movie night on Friday...we could host it at ours". Bella spoke towards Evie and Lily, from where she sat opposite them next to Zayn. "What do you all think?". 

"Sounds good to me". Lily's gentle voice agreed as she reached for her glass in front of her. 

"Just don't pick shit films like last night". Evie's voice from next to me directed her comment back to Bella. I had a feeling she didn't like the film choice from their evening last night. 

Whilst the girls bickered back and forth about what they considered a good film, I was relived to see the waiters walking towards us with plates covering both hands. 

After the group had eaten our lunch and paid for the bill, Lily explained that she was going over a friend's house for the evening. Niall and Louis were going to stay in the pub for an extra few drinks and Bella and Zayn had left to go back to our flat. 

"As much as I love your company, I'm going to go because my bed is calling along with an episode of friends". Evie reached for her bag before standing up. 

"Can't tempt you to stay with a drink Green?". Niall fluttered his eyelashes at her as he rested his chin on his fist. 

Evie shook her head with a small giggle at Niall attempt to get her to stay. "Sorry Horan...if you want to see me in class tomorrow then this gal needs her rest". 

"Fuck off Eve...you'll still be late so you may as well stay with us". Niall teased her on time management, his back hitting the chair he sat on. 

"Fine you caught me...you're boring me so I'm leaving!". The loud laugh that left the Irishman caused others to turn and look. 

I explained to Niall and Louis that I'd meet them back at the flat later on, as I was going to walk Evie home to make sure she was safe. Walking off behind Evie, not giving them a chance to make a teasing comment about it. 

The cold breeze circled us as Evie and I walked side by side in the direction of her flat. As the wind picked up around us, I noticed her arms wrap around her petite frame to try and keep warm. I shook off the jacket that my shoulders held and placed it around her. 

"It's alright...we're nearly there". Evie went to slide my jacket back off her shoulders. 

"Eves keep it on your shivering". I insisted as we began to up our walking pace, eager to escape the cold air. 

Her shoulder gently bumped against my upper arm due to her height. "Such a gentleman". 

"What can I say? My Mum raised me well". I grinned down at her as we walked up to her brick building. 

As we stood outside, I was expecting her to say goodbye and I'd continue my walk to my own flat. But the hesitation was intense as I waited for her to say something. "Do you want to come in?". 

I wasn't aware that I looked like I was trying to think of a reason to say no, until I could see nervousness build in her eyes. "Yeah...sure...I'd love to". 

I followed Evie up the flight of stairs until we reached the second floor and as we approached the second door on the left, Evie rumbled through her bag to find her keys before unlocking the door. 

As I closed the door behind us, I watched Evie walk around her space in comfort. She placed her bag down on the side table in the hallway before kicking her shoes off and leaving them to settle where they landed.

I took suit and flicked my own shoes off and putting them neatly together so nobody would trip over them if they came home. 

Evie opened the door to what I assumed was her room and approaching carefully I was surprised at how cosy she had managed to make the small space. Fairy lights along the wall above the double bed that was pushed against the wall. Different style cushions covered the bed and a large sage green rug covered the hard wood floor.

"I'm going to make some tea, do you want one?". Her soft voice broke me from my thoughts as she now stood in the door frame. 

"Yes please!". She smiled at my eagerness towards the warm cuppa. 

I smiled as I saw framed photos hanging on the wall. One included Evie standing between Bella and Lily, the three of them cuddled into each other as they widely smiled at the camera. Another one was of her and Niall, from a night out. It was captured as they were laughing historically over something, each holding a drink in their hand. 

The last photo caught me by surprise. A picture I had forgotten existed. It was from our first year at university. A group photo of us all taken in girls first flat that was part of the university. Evie was standing between Niall and I as we huddled together. But what caused my heart to warm was with a pink sharpie pen the word 'family' had been neatly written above.

In the corner of my eye I spotted the wooden guitar sitting still on its stand. I knew Evie could play the guitar well, Niall had told me how she was good competition for him. I hope one day she'll play for me, I'd like that a lot. 

"This is exactly what we need after being out in the cold". Evie walked back into the room, two grey mugs held by her hands before she placed them down on the table next to the bed. "I hope you don't mind but I'm going to change into something comfier...I think Zayn may have left some stuff here if you want to me to go find you something too". 

Before I could even respond Evie mumbled that she was going to look in Bella's room. I let out a small laugh as I watched her move quickly out of the room. 

"Here there's a pair of shorts, I'll go to the bathroom to get changed and you can change in here". Again, before I got a chance to say a word, Evie was gone again. The only way in could describe her movement was moving a thousand miles per hour as she got distracted by different things.

I carefully rolled my jeans down my legs, they screamed in gratefulness as I replaced them with the loose black shorts. Neatly, I followed my jeans and placed them on top of the chest of drawers. 

"That's fucking better...I hate the feelings of tight jeans". I watched as she threw the once worn jeans and t-shirt towards the laundry basket, but missing it and the clothes landing to the side of it. Evie now wore a pair of beige pyjama shorts and black sweatshirt. 

The sight of her bare legs as the shorts sat high on her hips made me break eye contact and focus on her reaching for her mug of tea instead. Before opening the duvet she took a large gulp before placing it back down and climbing under the duvet. 

Evie glanced to where I stood, and I realised I looked out of place as I hadn't said a word or moved an inch. "Are you going to stand all night?".

"I was planning on it actually", I said with humour attached to it. 

"Ha-fucking-ha! C'mon get in, I want to watch Friends". She pressed the buttons on the remote with urgency as her eyes followed the movement on the tv.

I slid in next to her, my back met the plump pillows behind me as I rested my head against the fabric headboard. I recognised the Friends episode as the one after Ross and Rachel go on a break. 

"We were on a break". I mimicked the line that Ross repeats once Rachel finds out he had slept with another woman the previous night. 

"You watch Friends?". Evie's voice was curious and the way her lips curved into a grin made me release that she was happy about it.

My shoulders involuntarily shrugged as I scratched the skin at the back of my neck. "Meh...I've seen a few episodes". 

"Yeah alright...you just quoted the line not even thirty seconds in". I got called out on my attempt to play my love for the series down.

"I've got a good memory!". I held my hands up in surrender as she bumped her shoulder with mine, as we were now a similar height lying next to each other.

We were a couple of episodes in and it was great to hear Evie belly chuckling at the series playing in front of us.  If someone had said to me a couple of weeks ago that Evie and I would be lying in bed together on a Sunday evening watching reruns of Friends I'd have called them a liar. 

My mind thought back to my conversation with Niall about never knowing if I didn't try. Although it pained me to admit that Niall Horan was right, I couldn't deny it.

"Do you want a cuddle?". I asked as I turned to look at her. My inner self swallowed itself at how cringey that sounded out loud. "M'sorry that sounded so much smoother in my head".

A laugh escaped her lips. "Are you forgetting when I asked you to cuddle me last week? Cringe is an understatement". 

"You were drunk and upset...a valid excuse if you ask me". A fair argument compared to my attempt to make a move. 

"Do we need an excuse to cuddle?". Her question held some flirtation as the infectious smirk appeared on her lips. Testing me to see who would make the move first. 

With a genuine smile covering my mouth. I lifted my arm as a signal for her to move over. Without thought she rested her head on my shoulder, her arm gently landed on my chest and surprisingly I felt her leg overlap with mine as our skin met. 

"No excuse needed!".

---

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[brainr0t-landfill]

🌃 Mercurial

ghoap x male reader

Chapter Three: Devour

"I can be good, I can be true

You know I don't love anyone, but I love you"

-Nicole Dollanganger, Chapel

(tw: poverty, dishonest reader)

You don't like it, you don't like it a damn bit.

You don't like the bandage on your bottom lip, you don't like the smiley face doodle next to their supposed names, you don't like that your front door is locked with the only key of the shitty, rental sitting safely on the cracked tile floor.

It makes you feel small, it makes you feel pathetic; like a small thing desperate for help the feeling claws away at you twitching your fingers as you punch their numbers in and thank them, lashes out your throat when the same snobby kid comes into the shop with the same posh car he's brought in four times this month.

It makes you restless, it makes you damn near resentfull to these two men who in no way deserve it, they just helped some poor bloke get home after a night out, they probably never thought about it again or maybe they did; maybe they still do maybe they think about how needy you are as you three text back and fourth.

You feel as like you owe them and it kills you inside, so you decide to repay them.

'hey off work this Sunday wanna hangout? :)'

And then it began, looking back now, from this distance, you can see the way you'd twisted the narrative, convinced them they could love you, that you were good.

It was awkward at first, then it was friendship, then you were sitting cross-legged on the bed getting invited into their relationship. At the time it had seemed too erratic, too fast, no time to sit and think, no time to second guess but from this distance you can see how you wiggled your way into a place meant for them, carved a space out in hearts desperate for stability and already occupied, for someone like you, somone who didn't know how stay.

It was always transactional on your part, or at least it was supposed to be.

You would help them out for the grace they had shown you that night and you would prove to them that the help they gave you that night was justified you would lead them into thinking you were a person deserving of good things. You had no ill intension despite the driving force behind these actions being festering, putrid emotions. And then you'd leave once the cards were even, your feathers smooth. You'd skip town like so many times before and leave them behind with good, happy memories.

But you stayed.

You showed up on time to planned hangouts, you cleaned up after yourself when you stayed over and cleaned up the flat they shared with the spare key Ghost had given you half a year into knowing you and stocked the pantry with foods you knew they liked, listed on a little notepad while they were on what you used to know as business trips.

You were overstepping boundaries, you were too much, you were restless. You were appriciated.

Then you let them in after they got kicked out from their flat because John got into a fight with the nosy landlord. You took notice of their likes, dislikes, the things that set them on edge wrote themn down and acted accordingly.

You gave the neighbours fake names and vague answers whenever they asked about them, you kept scotch in the kitchen closet and sleeping pills behind the cracked bathroom mirror, you kept the door barricaded with a chair at night and didn't even think of unlocking it untill you confirmed it was them.

In turn they opened up to you about their profession, their pasts, their relationship, their insecurities their desires.

You were ingenuine, you were too obedient, you were smothering.

You were becoming irreplaceable.

You were sitting by the window sill with John ,Simon out on an errand, when he said.

"Ye ken, we uhh- we appreciate you a lot hare. Wit' what we do 'n how we can be I ken we ain't the easiest folks to be around."

You snorted into your morning tea shaking your head as you knocked your shoulder against his.

"And I'm just the dew on morning grass ain't I? It's lovely to have y'all around, needed me some reliable mates for a while now anyways. And don't I owe you?"

John turned to you recently plucked eyebrows raised.

"Owe us? Fer what?"

"Y'know, that night by the pub, I'd have probably become a headline that night without you two."

It's his turn to shake his head in disbelief, giving you that lovely smile you're slowly becoming accustomed to.

"Don't ye think that score's been settled a few dozen times by now?"

And before you knew it the three of you were saving up money for a new flat (you should have said no, you shoul have told them you always kept your suitcase packed for when you were finnaly sick of things too familiar, too comforting, too yours).

The scotch and the pills are replaced with fresh strawberries from the farmers market and melanin gummies in the new fridge Simon cleaned every Sunday, days of biting your tounge against customers were now full of work at a different shop with encouraged and nurtured patience and a customer service smile half genuine with the thought of going home to them. Nights out at pubs were slowly becoming dates, vauge answers and calculating looks were confessions and and eyes soft in the light spilling through the tall window of your new apartment.

Someone smoothes their hand down the expanse of your back as you're putting up curtains, it's early but you want it done before you head off to work so all three of you sleep better in the privacy and shade it provides, so the new apertment feels more like home.

Simon's smiling at you, his face is bare and his hands warm, they just got home yesterday, none of you sleep well in new environments, you're glad the new bed has enough room for them to toss and turn.

His cheeks are flushed from sleep.

"Bit short for the job angel, let me help?"

You step down from the stool and hand him the end of the thick curtain, marine blue with patterns swirled on it like puffs of smoke.

"Always nice havin' tall lads at my disposal."

You joke watching his muscles flex and his hands work as they slide the rings on. You lean your head onto his thigh.

"It's warmer here, don't ya think? Real airy too, lots of room for us."

You nod, you haven't lived in a place so nice in years.

"Better when it's with you two."

Ghost and John became Simon and Johnny then Simon, you and Johnny.

You had dug yourself into a hole you did not deserve, built yourself a place not meant for people like you, filled it with the care and concern that had once been so calculated and planned before it became effortless, natural.

Your home, your safe heaven, your boyfriends; with your old suitcase rotting in a landfill somewhere.

Before you knew it you were restless once again.

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[pacifymebby]

Trouble / Chapter Thirty Six

Alfie

"The fuck are you thinking Solomons you can't take her to that fucking hospital!"

The peaky boys temper really was quite amusing, a little touching even. I couldn't help but laugh at him when he tried to get all up in my face.

Sylvia had slipped away when I'd told her to find a coat, but he'd just stood there, glaring at me. His teeth gritted, nostrils flared. Very angry. When I'd told him that - that he looked very upset - he'd almost lost it. Almost gave me the excuse I'd been looking for to smack a little bit of sense into him.

Because if there was one thing I couldn't get my head around, it was how he could have been so stupid as to help her sneak out in the first place. How he could possibly have thought bringing her to me, came under the notion of "keeping her safe."

She didn't look very safe to me. Wandering around my town house in what was a very, very dangerous part of London now for anyone who bore the name Shelby.

"My fuckin house peaky boy," I said with a smirk and a shrug, hands in my pockets, "I can do whatever I like."

I felt childish saying it to him but the glee it sparked in me to see him scowl. To hear him try and reason with me again, it was too much to resist.

"That hospitals an open target and you know it, she could get herself killed!" He hissed at me, teeth bared in my face. But his hypocrisy kept me smiling, his infuriation only growing.

"Perhaps you shoulda thought about that eh lad, before you enabled this reckless, no no no, fucking suicidal crusade she's on yeah... Don't talk to me about her safety right treacle, because so far right, so far sweetheart, I ain't got no evidence at all, not a fuckin shred, that you've done anything to keep your fuckin word..." I said jabbing him in the chest then, gritting my own teeth as I leered over him, shoved him with one hand on his shoulder against the door frame. "You want to talk about her precious safety yeah, riddle me this khamer, riddle me fuckin this... If you care so much about her fuckin safety then what in the name of all that is good and fuckin right on this here gods earth yeah, did you fuckin bring her here for eh? To me... To this fuckin deathtrap city yeah? Why the hell did you go an do something like that?"

He glared up at me, ever insolent, sullen as Sunday evening, scowling as I debated saying anything else. I could have held my tongue, could have kept the rest of my scattered thoughts to myself, the concerns I had for the girl he'd walked into my office the day before. And for a moment I had decided to. To let him go.

But when he tried to defend himself I couldn't help myself. Couldn't help the loathing I felt for him when he tried to give me an excuse.

"You didn't fuckin see her in her bedroom window with a gun to her fuckin head Alfie, you don't know what she's like!"

It was impossible not to sneer then. Impossible to hold myself back. It was the least I could do when I grabbed him by the scruff of his shirt and shoved him up against the wall, ground my teeth and spat every word at him.

"And you do do you treacle? Think you know the little girl well yeah? Cause the thing is right, that little girls been living in my territory since she was 8 years old, that's fuckin 10 years yeah... And you know who it is thats been keeping her and her sister safe these past ten years? Any guesses peaky boy? Who's been keeping the fucking monsters from under her bed, who's been keeping the hooded fuckin claw at bay? Any guesses sweetheart? Ten years of peace and fuckin quiet?" I asked, fist shoving him up against the wall a second time just to drive the point home. "Any ideas?"

Isaiah maintained the same sullen glare, refusing to back down. The challenge in his eyes making me want to smack his stubborn sulk clean from his face. But I wouldn't. And I wouldn't because of Sylvia. Because I needed her to trust me too.

"Think I might know her a bit better than you think khamer."

I shoved him one last time and then left him standing there with his stupid sullen face on. The hunch of his shoulders only driving home my initial observation. That he was wildly out of his depth. That Tommy had made a mistake placing his wildest little sister in the care of this sullen adolescent who was clearly too soft on her to behave objectively.

"Sylvia!" I called listening for the sound of her little feet on the stairs, "Sylvia poppet.." I didn't turn round to see the glower on Isaiah's face but I could feel it, his glare burning into the back of my skull, left a little smirk dancing on my lips. A smirk which faded the second I saw her at the top of the stairs. Her frail silhouette, the way she seemed to teeter on the edge of the steps. I wasn't a nervous man but seeing her descend those stairs had me on edge. Her movements so delicate that she seemed unstable and I felt the urge to climb the stairs too just so that I could help her down them.

"Right darlin, you got a coat? Cause I think you'll probably need a coat yeah cause the skys not exactly lookin too promising an I've got a bad feeling about the rain today yeah... We'll need to get you somethin to keep you cosy warm I reckon?" I said when she'd reached the bottom of the stairs and was stood just in front of me. I put my hands on her shoulders and looked down at her, a concerned little frown on my brow.

She looked up at me with eyes which reminded me of her brother's. That same distance in them. Like she wasn't really standing in front of me at all.

I didn't like it. It wasn't that it made me nervous, didn't disturb me the way it was intended to. The way it did most people. It was that it left a certain sadness chewing away at my heartstrings. Made me feel all kinds of melancholic when I looked at her and saw all the feeling drained from her. Because I understood that look on her brother, understood it in the eyes of Polly Gray, but I didn't understand it on someone as young as her. Someone who had for the most part, been kept safe from the horrors of the world I lived in.

She looked cold. Her skin had a greyness about it, a translucence which made me wary to touch her. But one look at her told me that that was what she needed. Hands on her shoulders to hold her. Because more than anything she looked lonely and a little scared. Despite all her efforts I could see the apprehension in her eyes.

"Yeah," I said as I looked her up and down, "We'll find you a nice warm coat and uh, something with a hood I reckon, yeah, cause it's gonna rain I reckon and we wouldn't want you catchin a chill would we poppet." I said as I called out for one of my boys to come and find the girl a coat, "one of my hoodies an all," I shouted after the lad as he disappeared up the stairs, "a pair of sunglasses too mate..." I added because I could predict the look she'd get on her when she had to leave her cousin in his hospital bed.

Fuckin heartbroke. And she wouldn't want to admit it, she'd hate anyone who looked in her direction whilst she was trying her best to fight back her tears.

When the lad I'd shouted to had returned with a black Barbour jacket and a dark pullover, Sylvia didn't even seem to notice him. He stood by waiting for her to take them from him and she just stood there looking straight through him vacantly until I coughed and caught her attention.

"Thank you Ben," I said, "good lad, now I ain't takin Cyril with us cause well he don't really like hospitals and they don't really like him, so you make sure he gets his lunch yeah, right, come here poppet," I turned my attention back to Sylvia when I saw she'd taken the coat but had made no move to put it on. "Let me help you with that yeah sweetheart," I said pulling the hoodie down over her head, kick-starting her reactions so that when I stepped away she slipped her arms into the sleeves and shrugged the jacket on too, coming back to us from wherever it was she'd slipped away to. "There we go see, now don't you just look the part darlin," I said fixing the collar of her jacket before I shrugged mine on and tucked her under my arm leading her out into the driveway.

It didn't go unnoticed by me that she didn't look back over her shoulder for Isaiah, didn't go unnoticed how she'd shoved her hands in her pockets and stepped out that front door with all the impatience and confidence of someone who took it for granted that they were safe. That nothing untoward would ever infringe upon their little life. And I knew she wasn't really naive enough to believe all that. Could see it somewhere in the swirl of those empty sorry eyes that she was a frightened little rabbit who wasn't really sure who the big bad wolf was anymore.

Made me wonder what had changed. The day before when she had walked into my study and danced on my rug, she'd kept glancing at the lad who watched her so possessively, as if to reassure herself that he was still there. Today she seemed to be living as if he was long gone and it was brutal. The way she'd looked straight through him when he'd tried to reason with her. Brutal the way she appeared to have turned on him so quickly. He was lucky really, that I was so hospitable. That I valued the agreements between me and the Peakys. That I didn't really intend on hurting him or the girl who'd so willingly abandoned him in favour of me. In favour of getting her own way. If I had they'd both have been completely fucked now.

Then again, Sylvia was a canny girl and I didn't doubt she'd have worked all that our for herself.

"Now then poppet, since as I promised we're going to have a little Alfie/Sylvie bonding day yeah, I thought you might like to choose which car we go in?"

From beneath my arm she looked around the drive at the cars which were parked up, looking no doubt for the one she had arrived in, a small frown etched into the bridge of her nose when she didn't see it.

"What happened to my car?" She asked making me chuckle, my smile lingering fondly as I shook my head.

"Well you see little Shelby, you see that wasn't actually yours now was it... And having stolen cars yeah, especially posh fuckin stolen cars, parked up in your driveway right, it just ain't a good look is it... So that old things long gone yeah, long gone..."

"Makes sense." She said shrugging herself free from my hold around her, walking up to the side of a black number with tinted windows and ostentatious unnecessar-in-the-big-city four wheel drive, "This one please Mr Solomon's."

Her manners amused me then. When she turned back over her shoulder to look at me, waiting for me to unlock the door. How she'd gone from vacant and sullen to suddenly sweet again. It didn't surprise me though, everything I'd seen of her over the last few years had taught me to expect this from her. The rumours and whispers which went round about her. The fact that no one ever quite believed she was dealing to the other girls at her school, the way even I'd struggled to believe she might have any bad habits to fund with illicit business endeavours.

Because she was the sweetest girl in London and everyone knew it. It was easy to believe she was a Gray because you wouldn't for one second believe she was related to her brothers.

And yet, there she was, leaning up against the side of my car with a gun tucked somewhere in the back of her ballet skirt. One she thought I didn't know about. But of course I did.

Sylvia

I leant against the side of the car looking up at Alfie, wide brown eyes blinking up at him. I was doing my best to remind him of the girl he thought he knew. The sweet, innocent Shelby. If I could appeal to his little known soft side I knew I would be safe. Knew not only that, but that if I could appeal to that softer side he'd treat me as I knew he had always treated Sonya. With a doting kind of softness.

Because I wasn't naive to all the ways Alfie and his men had been keeping watch over me and my sister since Tommy had packed us off to London. I wasn't naive to the reasons I'd gotten away with dealing on his territory, the reasons it had been so much harder for me to get into trouble.

And after Isaiah's hateful display in the middle of the night I knew I didn't really have anyone. Not just to dote on me but at all.

I'd been tired last night, tired but determined. Fuelled by a desperation to see my cousin, to see him alive so that someone could be there to hold his hand, to tell him he was going to be alright. That was a heavy emotion to carry. And the heavy emotions, those are the emotions I struggle to carry for very long. The feeling too overwhelming. Overpowering enough to leave me shaking, nerves frazzled. Heart pounding in desperate need of something to numb. And when Isaiah had pinned me down, his elbows and fists digging into my arms, his body weight baring down on me, marking me with grey and blue bruises. When he'd spat those unforgiving things at me in the dead of the night he had flipped that switch in my brain again and just like that the numbing had begun.

I'd lay there on my back all night, gazing up at the ceiling until I'd fallen asleep. Numb even in my dreams when I'd seen Sonya in a lake floating face down, hair and white dress floating around her. Numb even when I'd awoken from the dream with all the certainty that it had been a little more than just a dream.

I had turned my head to see Isaiah asleep, listened to his restful breathing and resented him for the peace he had found after instilling such a doomed feeling in me. Not fear but something worse. A nothing that eats you from the inside out.

If I'd been at school there'd have been ways of coping. If I'd have had my sister nearby there'd have been someone to ground me. But I wasn't at school and I didn't have Sonya. I was alone in the passenger side of Alfie Solomons car and he was looking at me with a contemplative calm on his scarred face.

We'd been sitting in the quiet for several minutes now. The both of us sitting still, looking out over the dashboard at the driveway and the thick iron gates which remained closed. He hadn't said a word, hadn't reached for the keys or tried to start the car.

We were simply sitting there side by side. And because I was tired, and because that hollow feeling had been left to grow and grow, I didn't mind. Wasn't concerned about the stillness or the silence. Wasn't worried that the erratic older man might snap whilst we were alone.

"Now," he said, his hands resting on the wheel, "you may have noticed, little Shelby, that we have been sitting in this vehicle now for five minutes, and I ain't yet made any efforts to start driving..." He patted his hands against the wheel and then let go, hands in his lap, then back to the wheel.

"Well I know you like to take your time with things Alfie..." I said with a little smirk, turning to meet his gaze with an impish light in my eyes. Pleased when he smirked too.

"Yeah," he said nodding his head, frowning as if thinking the notion over quite seriously, "yeah, I suppose you could say that little Shelby, I suppose you could say that yeah, cause I do... Slowness yeah, as Milan Kundera used to say, how did he say it, right yeah, there is a secret bond between slowness and memory, between speed and forgetting..."

I knew the book he was quoting well and smirked as I leant back into the headrest, let the seat hold me. Remembering for a moment quite how tired of holding myself up I was. Quite how tiring everything really was sometimes.

"The degree of slowness is directly proportional to the intensity of memory, the degree of speed is directly proportional to the intensity of forgetting," I said with a bored drawl, cutting him off with a small smile, it was a notion I'd always appreciated, even if I didn't particularly agree.

"Oh so you know it then," he smirked, "you're familiar with his philosophy on relaxing, taking your time..." I wasn't expecting him to turn then, the way he stared the conversation round a corner so carefully, so gently that when he asked his next question he really did catch me out and leave me speechless, "clearly don't believe in it yourself though do you little Shelby," he said, "something about slowing down taking one's time, don't really appeal to you or somethin poppet? That why you've spent the last few months pestering my boys for a bit of Charlie?"

I bit my lip.

"And on school nights no less..." He said with a quiet little whistle, faux amazement, almost as if he were teasing me. The frown on his features saying otherwise.

"Yeah," he said when I remained quiet, "silence," he said, "yeah sweetheart I was expecting that." He said, fingers still drumming one by one along the wheel. Slow and steady. Almost hypnotic. I couldn't help but watch them rather than him as he spoke. "Yeah, little miss Frankie Valli in my passenger seat," he said with a sigh, "now I must say poppet, if you were any other girl right, any average 18 going on 19 year old girl, I wouldn't be so... How dya put it eh? Concerned? Yeah we'll say concerned. If you were any other girl I wouldn't be all that concerned about a bitta blow on a Friday night yeah, but you little Sylvie with your opera house dreams and your sparrows appetite, you my girl, well... I'm puzzled right... Now dealing yeah, thats one thing, and of course dealing on my streets well that's just f... That's just plain cheeky ain't it... But sniffin the stuff, nurturing a habit of your own... Now poppet, really?"

When he said that word, really, he looked at me with his head cocked slightly, a look of genuine confusion on his scarred face.

I didn't say anything. Smiled a little because he sounded like some old werrit. Like an aunt who gets all her news from the daily mail and still gets it confused.

But I didn't say anything because I didn't really know what to say. It was true, I had asked on a handful of occasions for a bit of coke or some mdma from some of his lads... And sometimes it had been with the intention of selling it on to girls I went to school with who were richer than me and whose places in class were not so fragile as mine. And it was true that sometimes I'd been known to trial the goods or share a bag between friends in the bathroom of a bar in town. But those occasions were rare, blue moon rare and it wasn't so much I hadn't thought Alfie would find out, it was that I hadn't really imagined he would care.

"What's the matter poppet?" He asked, "didn't think it'd get back to me? You were asking my boys after all, an my boys are good lads ain't they, you know that... Always done a good job lookin out for you and your sisters yeah? You know they're good, honest lads, course they told me what you'd been up to poppet and don't get me wrong yeah, don't get me wrong, I'd rather you were getting it off my lads than say, Italians... But here's the thing yeah, I'd rather you weren't doing it at all..."

"Didn't realise you were so invested in my wellbeing Alfie..." I started with a small smile. Glad to know that my theory had been correct. That the old grudge of Camden Town had a soft spot for at least some of life's beauties, that his care for me and my sister wasn't simply bankrolled by Tommy. That our art had made us an interest to him too.

"Actually poppet I know you ain't that naive so I don't wanna hear none of that yeah, if you didn't know all of that already you wouldn't have skipped into my office yesterday, wouldn't have slept the night in one of my spare bedrooms... Certainly wouldn't have left your boyfriend behind with my boys... Would you?"

I smirked at that. The bitter tone with which he said the word boyfriend. I wondered whether he had realised the resentment which came out with the word, wondered if he thought I would pick up on it. Was only grateful that the spite, the hatred Isaiah had showed me in the middle of the night had drained me enough of feeling that the suggestion didn't leave me struggling to hide a blush as it might have done even a handful of days before.

"No." I said, thinking about correcting him, deciding I definitely didn't need to.

"No," he confirmed nodding his head slowly, starting the ignition and beginning to creep slowly towards the towering iron gate at the end of the drive. "No, you wouldn't..." He said drumming his fingers again. "See the thing is my darlin," he said starting again just when I had begun to think he might let us rest in silence for the journey, "the thing is yeah, now you're going to be staying with me for a little while yeah, little old me - a very 'ospitable man right - now youre gonna be staying with me for a little while yeah, your health and safety and general wellbeing right, well that's all my responsibility aint it... And your peaky boy lapdog might be a bit of a soft touch yeah, might value keeping you sweet over keeping you safe yeah, but I, am first and foremost, primarily concerned with all of the above yeah? That is your health, your safety and your general sense of spiritual wellbeing, right?"

I nodded my head, held my hands in my lap and played with the rings on my fingers.

"So I'm gonna ask you very nicely yeah, and we're going to come to a couple of little agreements yeah?" He waited this time for me to answer him and when I nodded my head he nodded his too almost satisfied.

"Good," he said, "good girl."

I looked out of the window at the street as we pulled out of Alfie's driveway. I hadn't realised the evening we'd been brought to his house but he lived on a private road, one of those with a monitored gate at both ends. Huge evergreens which lined the avenue. Like something from an old movie. So quiet, so peaceful. It seemed strange to be driving down it with such a gruff, brutal man by my side.

"So, agreement one, I reckon it's pretty self explanatory right, plain old common sense yeah... You keep your precious distance from those illicit substances yeah?" He asked, of course it wasn't a question and it also wasn't really a question which needed to be asked. How was I supposed to deal his drugs when I was essentially under his house arrest.

"I haven't got a drugs habit," I said chewing my cheek, glancing to my right to look at him. He was watching the road now but every now and then he would turn his attention back to me.

"Agreement number two," he raised his voice a little to hush me, cracking am almost cheeky grin when I smirked, "me an you yeah, we're gonna uphold a policy of truth... You know what that means little Shelby?" He asked without giving me a chance to answer him, "you ain't gonna tell me no more lies alright? You're gonna be a good, honest little lady from now on yeah?"

I nodded my head and waited for him to move on but when he remained silent, held his tongue and turned back to me, his brow raised, I realised he was waiting for me to speak up.

"Truth," I said, "are you gonna tell me the truth?"

I'd half expected him to laugh at me, to think me naive for asking the question. Surely his answer couldn't possibly satisfy me.

And yet it did.

When he appeared to soften upon looking at me, his eyes flickering over me, my bored sullen features, my body tucked beneath his hoodie and coat. I thought I saw a flicker of sympathy. Wanted to hate him for it.

"Yeah poppet, I'm gonna tell you the truth an all." He nodded his head solemnly. Tapped his hands on the steering wheel as we slowed in the traffic.

"Now number three, I ain't really sure how to word this yeah, not when you seem to be as wild and as reckless as the rest of your bloody family... And we've come full circle really right because it ties in rather nicely with rule number one I reckon... Rule number three yeah, you little miss Shelby, are gonna stop putting yourself in harm's way yeah... You're gonna start eating your f... Eating your breakfasts and getting your early nights, and you're gonna hop off this little suicidal roller coaster you seem to think you're on now yeah... I'm taking you to see your cousin now right, because although I might have the reputation of a cold blooded serial killer yeah, a soulless bloody monster... I'm still not fond of seeing little girls such as yourself, looking as fuckin... Sorry poppet, I'm really tryin here you know poppet, yeah... I don't like seeing little girls lookin as sad as you looked last night... So I'm doing you this kindness, against my better judgement... And the way I see it right, the way I see it is that if me, yeah, an 'orrible, evil old man, can compromise and take you to see your rather messed up cousin in the hospital, then you my sweet, you poppet, can be good for a couple of weeks yeah, you can at least do me a favour and make takin care of you a little bit bloody easier..."

"You want me to eat breakfast?" I asked feigning confusion. Trying to pretend I didn't really understand what he'd been banging on about for the last five minutes.

We were nearing the hospital now and I was hoping that if I stalled a little longer his absent mind would wander. But I knew better than to believe his mind was really absent at all.

"Amongst many other things my darlin..." He said a little softer, his voice strangely gentle as he spoke to me then. He met my gaze across the car and held it. Gave me this look I didn't want to understand. It was one of concern, one I wasn't quite sure I wanted to trust.

"And if I don't promise you?"

"Well," he said pushing his bottom lip out in s pout, hid thick brows knitting together too, "well that wouldn't be very nice would it sweetheart, that wouldn't make me a very happy man..."

I let us linger in silence, him still pulling that ridiculous face at me. My mind flitting through my limited options. If he had simply been asking me to promise to "look after myself" I could have done so easily, could have made my throwaway vow and not worried, not felt guilty for breaking it. It was everything else I was hesitant to agree to.

"You know poppet I'd really rather you did..."

"After we've been to see Michael..." I started, let him cut me off because I wasn't entirely sure what I was asking him to clarify.

"Yeah, after we've been to see Michael today right, I want you to drop all this runnin around with guns and gangsters, stealin cars and killing your neighbours... Ain't healthy is it... Ain't no way for a young lady with opera house aspirations to be behaving... Might be your brother's game poppet but it ain't yours, shouldn't be yours..."

"Right..." I said letting my word linger in the quiet between us as he parked up outside the hospital doors.

"Right..." He said gesturing with one hand to coax me along, to get me to give him a little bit more. "You gonna say those magic words for me now yeah poppet? You gonna promise me from the bottom of your pretty pink heart?"

"Well you see that's just the thing Alfie," I said being careful to sound as sweet as I could, "I can't promise you anything until I've seen him can I?"

"Ain't hard little Shelby, it's just a handful of teeny tiny little words..." He said.

"I've just promised you I'll always tell you the truth though you see..." I bit my lip, tried to keep my voice steady as we neared the hospital and it's shadow loomed over the city. This old gothic looking building they'd never bothered to update.

I'd been in once for a suspected concussion. I'd fallen from a lift and knocked my head off another girl. Both of us had had to sit side by side waiting to be checked over. Both of us hoping they'd simply send us straight back to school. We'd been young enough then that a couple days off wouldn't really have mattered, but sitting there in the gloom of that waiting room had struck fear into us both. I'd learnt after that to lie, to do my best to hide each and every injury so as never to end up back there. Especially as the injuries got worse and the chance at an over night stay grew higher.

"Yeah," he said, "yeah you have... So perhaps yeah, I need to ask you another question then, bare with me poppet, I reckon this will be my last for now right?"

I waited quietly for him to carry on, sat patiently whilst he pulled us onto the hospital car park and mulled his thoughts over. His thumb stroked the steering wheel maintaining that hypnotic rhythm and I found myself once again unable to take my eyes off his hands. The rings on his fingers which caught the sunlight each time he flexed or drummed that slow rhythm against the leather wheel.

"Alright," he said, "answer me this little Sylvia," he said, "can you even shoot that gun you've got tucked away in your skirts?"

"You think I've spent the last ten years at a boarding school full of Hampshire's most promising without ever visiting a shooting range..."

"Bit different sweetheart, a little bit different that I reckon..."

"All the same," I said, "I know how to fire a gun."

"Alright," he said, "alright darlin I believe you yeah, reckon you probably do know how to fire a gun actually yeah you're very right, very correct... But don't you think yeah, it might be best to leave the killing to your brother's... Now don't get me wrong I'm no misogynist..." I bit back a laugh when he said that.

"Of course not..."

"Exactly, of course not," he reiterated, "but don't you think yeah, that on this occasion, when you ain't shootin at little targets, and the targets in question are pretty experienced when it comes to shootin back, don't you think it might be better to leave this one up to your big brothers...."

"If I could trust them I would." I said solemnly, with such certainty that all Alfie could really do was nod his head. There was no defending my brothers treachery. This wouldn't be the first instance of him lying and manipulating the family, of him selling blood down the river in the name of preservation and the greater good. Alfie knew that better than most. He'd been on the receiving end of that imorral streak more than once.

So instead he simply nodded, sat there by my side staying quiet for long enough that the subject changed without either of us trying.

I looked out at the carpark, he'd parked us close to the doors, in a disabled bay no less, and I wasn't naive enough not to know why.

He wasn't expecting this to be a simple visit. Wasn't expecting to get me from the hospital back to his all in one piece.

I tugged my bottom lip between my teeth, watched the automatic doors slide open and closed.

"Now I reckon I already know how this is gonna go yeah little Sylvia," he said lowering his voice, "ain't gonna patronise you though yeah, just gonna do my due diligence right and let you know, ain't gonna be pretty, an I'm sure you've a stronger stomach than most little girls yeah, but if at any point you want to leave yeah, either cause it's all a bit much or cause you've got a bad feeling about somet, you just give me a look yeah, any look you like right cause I'm a clever old man me and I will know exactly what you mean yeah, you just give me the look and I'll have you outa there in seconds... No questions asked right?"

"I'll be fine." I said starring straight ahead. I already knew what I was going to see, already knew it would be devastating, would probably sicken me. Already knew I wasn't going to feel safe once we left that car. Already knew that if in fact something awful happened and the enemy were waiting for us, Alfie might not be able to get me out at all. That once we left the sanctuary of his car, we had to accept we might never return to it.

"But thank you all the same." I said a little quieter, my hand reaching for the door handle. Hovering for a moment when he stopped me, his hand on my thigh. A softness in his low gravelly voice when he implored me to look back at him once more.

"I'm sure you will be little one," he said, his eyes warm, almost emotional, "I don't doubt you for a moment my dear."

Michael looked terrible. Everything everyone had warned me, the brutal descriptions and implications paled in comparison to the truth which lay, unconscious in a hospital bed, wires slithering like snakes from his nose, oxygen mask covering his face, latched onto him like a parasite. A cannula in his hand, yellow and purple bruising watercolour staining his knuckles. He looked dead, a corpse wired up to a machine. Some kind of dystopian Frankensteins monster esque figure.

He had two black eyes and a broken nose, his skin sore. Patched up in so many places, two many bloody bandages and packed wounds to count.

He'd had major surgery, medical induced coma, under constant observation. He was on a ventilator for now and when the nurse had looked at me she hadn't told me not to worry.

But it wasn't the state of him that worried me. Because I kept telling myself that if there wasn't a chance they could save him, they'd have given his bed to someone they could save.

It wasn't the blood and the deathly shadow which stained him.

It was the fact that when we'd arrived the men Tommy had organised to watch his room, to wait outside and guard him with their lives, were both napping. One had fallen asleep playing fucking candy crush on his phone, the other had dosed off with his flat cap tilted down across his eyes.

Alfie had seen them in the same moment I had, his arm around my shoulder tightening his grip, tucking me into his side a little closer so that I couldn't escape or do anything drastic.

Before we'd left the car he'd told me to put my hood up, tucked my hair behind my ears and under the hoodie. He'd opened my door for me and his arm had fallen around my shoulder, tucked me into his jacket as if I belonged to him. I knew it was so people would think I did. So that anyone watching us would think twice about whatever moves they'd been ordered to make. I knew it was also because he was hoping he could get me inside without anyone realising who I was.

Now however he was holding me tight to his side to stop me waking the dinlows sleeping on duty with my gun. With the metal of my handgun cold and sharp against their skulls.

Instead they were woken by Alfie's subtle cough.

He wore a smirk on his lips that was smug, the kind intended to put them in their place immediately. And they were. When they woke it was with a start, scrambling to attention, their eyes wide when they saw not only me but the fearsome bastard king of Camden Town looming above them.

"Nap time is it boys?" He asked them with a chirpiness to his voice which wound me up beyond belief and left them stuttering to spit out an excuse. Though of course there was no excuse they could give me that would see me forgive them for their carelessness. "Leave them to me poppet, you're here to see your cousin right so you just go an see your cousin..." He said, his hand on my lower back pushing me through the door to Michael's room gently.

I hesitated, gripped by a cold, unforgiving anger when I turned my head to lock eyes with the lads that had been sleeping on duty. It was only when Alfie spoke again that I stepped inside Michaels room.

And when I saw him that familiar hollow feeling returned and sunk its teeth in deep. The numbing bite I knew wasn't going to let go. Because he was everything Isaiah had warned me and worse and the grey light from the rain outside only served to create an even more bleak mood in that sorry little hospital room.

I trod carefully towards his bed. Heard the door close quietly behind me. Heard the slam of someone's body up against the glass seconds later when Alfie began "dealing" with the lazy bastards who had valued a little nap over my cousins life. When I reached Michaels bedside I felt this receding feeling, like all the blood draining away from body leaving me untethered and half alive.

He looked half alive. Half man, half the wires and machines the doctors had fixed him up to in order to keep him alive.

There was a scar near his temple, an old wound and not from any real fight either. Him and John, when Michael was only small, they'd been fighting at the top of the stairs and John had tripped him. He'd tumbled down head over feet and knocked himself unconscious on the radiator. Well now there would be a second scar not so far from the first. The wound had been dressed and though the dressing was relatively fresh there was still a little blood poppy which had seeped through.

"Hi," I said softly, voice so quiet he wouldn't have heard it even if he'd been awake. And of course the moment the word left my lips I felt ridiculous. Over emotional, a child playing make believe, talking to a sleeping half-dead man pretending he could hear me because it made me feel better. Made me feel more in control. And what was I supposed to say to him anyway. I wasn't about declare that I'd avenge him or that everything was going to he okay. I wasn't and it wasn't and there was no point kidding either of us. Especially not myself.

So instead I did the only thing I knew how to do when people were lost or almost lost.

I drew the sign of the cross, head to heart, shoulder to shoulder. Mumbled the prayer I still carried from childhood but couldn't be sure I still believed in, father, son, holy spirit.

"Amen," I whispered before dropping to my knees at Michael's bedside, the cold hospital floor reminding me of my knees when it chilled me through my tights.

I didn't keep a rosary anymore - my mother would have cried - but I still wore my virgin mary round my neck and as I pressed my palms together I felt the warmth of her copper medal over my chest. Tried to think of her as I whispered a prayer to Saint Anthony. The only prayer I could really still remember because in her last year our mother had had us recite prayers to the patron saint of miracles every morning and night without ever telling us what miracle it was for which we were begging.

The older I had grown the more I had understood that the miracle had been for her. To save her from the curse which ran in our blood. The hollow feeling which gripped me now.

"Blessed be God in His Angels and in His Saints," I whispered, "Saint Anthony pray for us." I said, eyes closed, palm to palm on the hospital floor. My forehead resting against the cool metal bedframe which held my unconscious cousin. "Saint Anthony, pray for us." I said it again, realising I could not remember the prayer as well as I had thought. Feeling untethered when I tried to conjor the memory of my mother kneeling by the fireplace in watery lane, praying to our statue of the virgin mary. When I realised how far from her, from home, I had grown.

"Blessed be God in His Angels and in His Saints, Saint Anthony, whose heart was ever full of human sympathy, pray for us..." I said, my lips moving quickly and quietly as I struggled to remember the flow and rhythm of the prayer. Outside I could hear Alfie, his words were muffled through the walls but I could hear the scuffling and panic they instilled.

"Whisper my petition into the ears of the sweet Infant Jesus, who...."

I could hear the groaned pain from one of Tommy's men, could hear the blunt thud as someone slowed against the wall.

"Who loved to be folded in your arms.... The gratitude of my heart will ever be yours..." I knew I hadn't uttered it correctly, knew there were verses I had long since forgotten. But it was the best that I could do as I knelt there on that cold floor, feeling oh so far away from my family and from my home.

I thought of Aunt Polly. What she would have given to trade places with me, to kneel at her son's bedside. And I worried that I was doing everything wrong, doing her a terrible disservice, michael too.

I was glad then that he couldn't hear me. That no one was witnessing my moment of childish weakness. Me fumbling through a prayer I used to know off by heart, hoping god and the saints would forgive me. Know that I was only trying to pray on behalf of Polly, who would have known every word and still believed in every prayer she uttered.

"Amen." I whispered as the door clicked open behind me. I heard Alfie's feet on the floor, the corridor was quiet but for wheezing and I already knew what he was going to say to me when I turned to look at him from where i knelt on the floor.

"Come on poppet time to go yeah, think I might have caused a little bit of upset..."

"No." I said remaining in my place on the floor, my fingers skimming over the miraculous medal around my neck. I hadn't expected myself to voice the doubt outloud until the defiance had left my lips but once it had I wasn't really shocked. The reckless way I was feeling today of course it had.

"Eh.. now hang on a minute girl..." said Alfie, he kept his voice quiet and sweet but I could tell he was growing impatient, "I thought we had an agreement yeah, you've seen your cousin so now..."

"That was before I knew Tommys men are fuckin incompetent!" I snapped.

"Woah, woah now little girl mind your language yeah..." he said holding his hands either side of his head.

"I'm not leaving him here alone."

"Yeah... well he ain't alone is he, your brothers lads are with him, keeping him safe..."

"They were asleep when we got here, you don't really expect me to trust them now?"

"Yeah well they was, asleep when we got here right... but darlin they ain't sleepin anymore right and you see me and you yeah, we need to leave right, cause I need to get you out of here yeah, away from you know..."

"Danger?" I asked still sitting quite stubbornly on the floor. "So I should be worried then? You're admitting it isn't safe to leave Michael unattended..."

"I mean..." he started, one hand on the back of his neck, the other joining it as he stepped inside and shut the door to with his foot. "No... it ain't safe for you Sylvia, but Michael... your cousin here, he'll..."

"Be fine will he? He's unconscious Alfie, completely fuckin defenceless... That how stupid you think I am? I'm not leaving him to lie here alone in this place like a fuckin sitting duck!" I snapped still kneeling at Michaels bedside determined not to be moved.

"Alright poppet enough of that yeah, I've had enough."

"I mean it Alfie."

"Yeah alright so you mean it," he said approaching me with a sudden temper on him, one which sent my heart racing in my chest, more so when he pulled me up from the floor with one simple movement. He grabbed my arm just above my elbow and yanked me to my feet so fast that I stumbled straight into his side. He held my head to his chest and ushered me into a far more gentle hold, softening again so quickly I ought to have had whiplash.

"Well I mean this yeah, it's time to go sweetheart, can't linger here yeah, especially because your brothers useless lot were sleepin on the job, its dangerous yeah, for you... and its you I care about protecting right..."

"I'm not leaving him with them" I said a little quieter as I pushed away from his chest just enough that I could meet his eyes with my own glare. He realised I was going to cry before I did, saw the glisten of tears in my eyes before I felt them. And I didn't feel them because I still felt so very hollowed out, the only feeling I had to latch onto my hatred for the useless lads outside.

"Eh..." he said even quieter then, his hand on my cheek calloused and rough despite his gentle hold, "I know, I know... you don't wanna leave him alone I know Sylvia, I know..."

"I'm not fuckin l..." I started but his thumb stroking my chin left my words hanging stale and forgotten in the air.

"We ain't gonna yeah," he said stroking my cheek gently with his knuckles before taking my head in his palm and guiding my face back to his chest, holding me against him. Doing me a kindness in hiding my tears from the two of us. Allowing me to pretend they weren't there at all. "Now don't get upset yeah poppet, don't wanna get you upset yeah, been warned about that by your little lapdog right... tell you what I'm gonna do right, I'm gonna phone my boys yeah, get some real goodens down here, and they're gonna watch over your Michael, see he's alright... promise you, I'll pick a good few better than your brother did yeah, how about that?"

I listened to his voice mumbling his apparent promises to me, tried to calm myself with a few calculated breaths. Wanted to be able to look back up at him without tears glistening in my eyes. Wanted him to look at me as a Shelby he respected rather than a little girl he felt sorry for.

"Fine." I said knowing I had no choice. Knowing from the way he'd ulled me to my feet without a second thought that he could shift me like a rag doll whenever the notion took him and I would have no choice but to do as he wished.

I pushed back out of his embrace, his arm falling away from me easily, the smirk of approval on his lips when he saw that I had regained my cool glaze driving me to stand my ground.

"But we aren't going until I've seen them."

"Yeah," he nodded, his hand stroking my shoulder as he let me go, slid his phone out his pocket and made a call. Winking at me as he turned away from me and took several slow steps towards the window.

I stood where he had left me, suddenly cold as I pulled the coat he'd lent me a little tighter around my body. I pulled the hood of his pullover up over my hair and then I stood there, watching his back, listening to him as he spoke quiet and calm on the phone.

He lent with his elbows on the sill. Slipped his phone back into his pocket and then nodded me over to his side.

"Oh," he said with a smirk, a mischief in his chuckle with drew me closer to him out of curiosity, "would you look at that," he said beckoning me over to his side in the window.

I joined him, let him tuck me under his arm again as he held me close to his side and I followed his gaze down to the carpark where we could see our car quite clearly.

"Someones left you flowers look..." he said with a chuckle, nodding towards his car, a bouquet of lillies and lilac flowers wedged between the door handle on the passenger side, "now ain't that a bit sweet eh? Ain't that just adorable..."

I felt a shiver run through me, that blood draining away feeling flooding through me again. So he'd been right, we were being watched, the hospital, his house, perhaps both. Perhaps we'd been followed. Perhaps those lads outside had already been bought.

Perhaps when we walked out of here thered be Italian open fire ready to rip through us both.

I tried to swallow down the thought. Tried to ignore the creeping fear and accept what I'd brazenly gotten myself into.

Alfie let out a laugh as he turned us both away from the window and walked us far enough back into the room that we couldn't be seen from outside or from another window.

"Good job our Ollie's bringing us a new car darlin thats all I'll say yeah..." he smirked shaking his head, "fuckin Italians, awful cliches... awful." He tutted as he let his fingers drum that hypnotic little rhythm along my shoulder as he squeezed me into his side. "Like I said though yeah poppet, nothin to worry about... though I can tell yeah, already know you yeah... you ain't exactly one for worrying, aint exactly faint hearted..."

And then I knew he was just being kind.

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movie night <3 hanjisungxreader

Part 4!! previous part is above :>

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Y/N wakes up for the day the next morning around 11:30. The sun isn’t shining on her face today, though. The sound of hard pouring rain crashes down onto her window, waking her up. The sky is cloudier than usual. It’s a dark gray and the fog from the bay covers the ground. She leans over to look outside her window. No one is outside. The rain is so heavy, streams are being formed along the sides of the roads. The smell of the rain can be smelled through her window, filling her room with a musky and fresh scent. Oddly, she loves it.  Y/N thinks the rain is beautiful. She rolls back over to her nightstand to grab her phone. She slides over to the camera and takes a few pictures of the rainy city outside her apartment. She then checks her notifications. She has a few texts from Jisung.

“Ur welcome! I’m sorry I didn’t respond right away. I was super tired and wanted to get home and I crashed on the couch. I just woke back up.” (sent 12:30 am)

“Also, just if your thinking, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable if I did, I was just overthinking and freaked out a little bit” (sent 1:00 am)

“Ok I’m really going to bed, goodnight, I'll talk to you in the morning” (sent 1:30 am)

Y/N reads the messages confused. She wonders why he was up so late and texting her. She hesitates to respond, she doesn’t know what to say. After a while, she responds. 

“Hi! I’m sorry you didn’t get much sleep, it’s raining today, so there's not much to do today, what are you doing?”

She sits up and goes to make breakfast. After she grabs her toast and coffee, she goes to her couch and turns on the TV. A few episodes into her favorite show, her phone dings.

“Hey, yea sorry I didn’t get much sleep last night, I don’t know why. Well today is Sunday so we have today off, so nothing really, you?”

Y/N jumps up in excitement. She smiles at his text, she's so happy he responded. 

“I’m not doing anything! Since you know where I live now, wanna come over for some popcorn and a movie?” Y/N texts him back, hoping he’ll respond positively.

“Yea sure! What time?” He responds quickly.

The clock reads 12:00, Y/N does her calculations on how long it will take for her to get ready for him to come over. She decides on 2:30. 

“Does 2:30 work?” 

“Yep! See you then”

Y/N shoots out of her couch and into the bathroom to shower. She takes a quick one, not washing her hair because she washed it the day before. She throws it into a quick messy bun and applies light, basic makeup. She throws on a big tee shirt and black shorts so she can be comfortable. She brings in Christmas lights into the living room and a bunch of blankets to make it super comfy. She heats up some popcorn, and only a few seconds later, she hears a knock at her door. She brushes down her shirt and fixes herself to open the door. She opens the door to see Jisung standing there. He’s holding a huge bag of those hershey's assorted chocolate bars. His dark brown hair is damp and falling over his eyes. His clothes are kind of wet from the walk into the building. Before walking in, he looks Y/N up and down. His eyes are locked onto her, making her blush. 

“Hi Jisung!” She says with a sweet smile.

“H-hey..” He responds, still staring at her.

Y/N rushes him inside so he isn’t just standing out in the hallway. 

“I’m guessing you like chocolate?” She asks.

“Heh, yea I do, I think it would be a good snack for us to share.” He responds. 

She takes them from him and puts them onto the counter. She shows him the comfy fort she made for them and brings over the snacks. 

“What do you want to watch?” She asks.

“Have you heard of (movie of your choice)?? I think it’s really good.” He says.

“No I haven’t! We should totally watch it! Plus, it’s super long so we can watch it for a while.” She pulls up the movie and presses play. They start the movie sitting on either side of the couch. They share a big bowl of popcorn and several snacks between each other. 

A little ways through the movie, they both reach for the popcorn at the same time. But instead of pulling their hands away, they stay there. 

“Oops haha, go ahead take some.” She says.

“Thanks, also, why are you all the way over there? Come over here.” He waves his hand towards him.

Y/N scoots over towards him and he puts his arm around her. She snuggles up closer to him. They get closer and closer to each other as the movie goes along, becoming more comfortable with each other. Eventually the movie comes to an end. The snacks are almost all gone. 

“Awe, does this mean you have to go?” Y/N asks Jisung.

“No.. not necessarily.” He looks down at her and smiles. 

They both look each other in the eye and slowly move closer into each other. Suddenly, their lips meet. His soft, warm lips carrsess Y/N’s. He puts his hand on the side of her face, making the kiss deeper. After a few seconds, they pull away from each other. 

“I’ve wanted to do that since I met you, Y/N” He tells her. 

“Hehe, me too”

They look each other deep in the eye. Y/N smiles and gives him another kiss on the cheek, he blushes and giggles back. He gets up and says

“But seriously it’s like 5:30 now, that movie was so long, I should probably get going..” He stutters.

“Awe okay, do you really have to go?” Y/N asks.

“I do, I have rehearsal early in the morning and I need to pack and I need to talk to the band and-” Y/N cuts him off

“Jisung, it's okay! You can go! You don’t need to make up excuses!”

“Okay, I’m sorry Y/N I just really have to go. I don't want to go but I have to.” 

“I know I know!! Just gooo!!” She says.

She walks him up to the door and opens it for him. She looks up into his beautiful brown eyes and gives him a hug. They hold that for a while until she backs away.

“I’ll text you later! Be safe!”

“Thank you! Text you!”

He leaves and she closes the door behind her, she is really falling for him faster that she thought she could. 

[ravensnpennies]

The Birthday of My Beloved Furchild and His Origin Story

Today is the day I celebrate Nimbus's birthday. I found him in 2014. He's changed my life for the better over that decade. I want to tell you the story of the day I brought him home.

It was hot. I remember that. I had my windows open and "God's AC" was going full-blast. The pain of dealing with the loss of my grandmother and the worry of homelessness was eating away at my sanity. The grief was so much I felt it might eat a hole right through me. I could not content with it.

Black despair the likes of which I hadn't felt in decades consumed my every waking though. Food was ash in my mouth and every drink was bitter and bile-filled. I was breaking and I wasn't sure I'd be able to survive. It was too much. The sheer...weight of what happened was destroying me.

I first heard the cries of a kitten three days prior one afternoon. I ignored it. Not my problem. But the cries persisted and persisted and slowly they got weaker. Whatever is in me that drives me made the call: I either help and investigate or live with that guilt forever. I did the former.

The sound was so faint by now. So soft and pleading. It took me almost 20 minutes to locate them coming from the neighbor's Buick "Sunday ride." He was not home at the time and his wife hated that car so when I asked to investigate she tossed me the keys. The sound was definitely coming from within.

I finally located the cat deep in the engine. Took me almost an hour but I went full on wrecking crew and dissembled it to get to him. It was a tiny, dirty kitten. He cried so much, but didn't fight. I wrapped him up in a towel, handed the keys back, and headed home with my smudged furry prize.

No, I wasn't keeping this animal. I'd saved it. That was enough. I'd take it to a no-kill shelter in the morning. I managed to get them to eat some food from a medicine dropper and then put them in a warm cozy place to sleep.

But he looked at me. Gawd, he looked at me and a cat can look at a king and he said clear as day, "Please, please let me stay? I will love you and care for you and I will be there for you every day. I will take your tears and I will purr at you to soothe your fears. Will you please let me stay?"

And God help me, I did. I didn't know how much I'd need him in the long run. How much of a change he'd bring to my life. How he kept his word and become this tiny little guardian. A lion in the body of a housecat. An angel come to Earth. But I didn't know how special he was - not till later.

You see, only a few years prior I almost died and because of organ damage I became diabetic. I'm brittle. It's rough. You make do. But something about Nimbus...something neither of us expected helped. He could tell when my glucose changed. Better, he found a way to communicate it to me.

But that wasn't all. The first time he woke me from a near diabetic coma I thought it was a fluke. He bit me till I woke up and then I dealt with it. The second time? There was something going on. When my glucose smelled like something he didn't like he would get my attention.

Usually knocking off my diabetes kit to the ground. He saved my life from extreme hypoglycemic attacks four times over the years. I'm talking EMT and ER time. Not just a low. As he grew older I realized how smart he really was. It was baffling. He wasn't any special breed or type. He was just a cat.

But he grew up big and and strong and smart as hell. He quickly grasped fuzzy concepts and relationships. He understood what I told him. I'd say a word and explain it to him and point/associate and then he'd remember. I estimate his intelligence around the 4-5 year old level. He's THAT smart.

I guess I just wanted to celebrate him a little. He deserves it. He's not just my companion, he's my child and I love and cherish him so dearly it makes my heart ache. He makes me crazy some days, but when I say I would die for this cat I mean that in the very literal sense of that phrase.

There are some other things he does. He's my work "rubberduck" - you have no idea how many hours we've spent together talking and solving problems with my writing/design. He also knows when my sleep gets stupid and reminds me. And another big one: I have night terrors. He helps.

He'll wake me up and calm me down until I can think and he just stays there till I'm as soothed as can be. He employs Aurora (our girl kitteh) as an enforcer. If I do anything he doesn't like, he goes to here, something passes between the,, then she yells until I do $whatever.

And some have asked me about how he checks my glucose. I managed to capture it tonight (and uploaded it). It's really this simple for the most part.

I love you so much, son. So damn much. And I'll always take care of you no matter what. You are not a pet. You are family and family don't begin or end with blood, much less species. To the next decade, you lovely beast.

[plazmafields]

It's ramble time because I started another playthrough of cyberpunk and have some Thoughts.

(Spoilers probably)

So I said in a previous post that I don't think Kerry is dating V just because Johnny's in his head, and I still believe that. However, I was also under the impression Johnny was a womanizer and way straight. However, now that they've fixed it so that what Johnny says is effected by your approval with him, Johnny's said some ... things. Things that make me think:

He's jealous of Kerry and V's relationship.

If you have high approval when Johnny gives you the quest Holdin' On, you can ask him why he and Kerry were always at odds. Johnny says something to the effect of: "Kerry could never decide if he wanted to fuck me or kick me out of the band. Problem was he has a dick, so I wasn't interested."

Now in my last 2.0 playthrough, my choices at the end of Phantom Liberty locked me into a low approval with Johnny that I couldn't come back from. With low approval, if you ask him in V's apartment if he's ok with you sleeping with Kerry, Johnny says (paraphrasing): "Sleeping with? He fucked you once. Don't get used to it."

However, with high approval he says: "Yeah. Kind of ironic, Kerry was always trying to get into bed with me and I guess he finally got what he wanted thanks to you."

V responds to this with: "You know, it's not always about you. Thought ever cross your mind?" And Johnny gives a snarky remark.

With low approval, Johnny is very defensive about Kerry sleeping with V. He and Kerry were friends, good friends, but even Johnny admits (while at his grave) that he never let anyone get too close to him. Kerry probably knew him second best after Alt, but how much of that was Johnny truly opening up, verses forced proximity? I really don't feel like Johnny is the type to be all "what are your intentions with my boy?" any time Kerry got a new boyfriend.

With high approval, Johnny still manages to make it about himself (as always), but for some reason his tone of voice sounds like he's not joking, he's genuinely thinking about whether this counts as him having fucked Kerry.

Now this leads me to ask: was it Johnny who had the crush on Kerry, and not the other way around? He brings it up all the time while you're doing Kerry's missions, but after Rebel Rebel, Kerry doesn't talk about Johnny unless you ask. None of the options when you talk to him at home mention Johnny, on the boat when he talks about Samurai, he doesn't bring up Johnny, and when he talks about starting a new chapter in his life you can ask "does this have anything to do with Johnny?" he says No very confidently, then takes a second to think and realize that none of this "rebirth" would have happened without V and Johnny. But (at least to me) he doesn't seem to consider Johnny part of his life anymore.

I think Johnny HATES that. I think Johnny always saw himself as hot shit and the most desirable man on the planet, and the idea that a gay man didn't want him drives him crazy. If Kerry were straight then of course he wouldn't fall victim to Johnny's charms.

If Kerry were bi (see my previous post if you wanna know my feelings on Kerry's sexuality in game vs in lore) then Johnny would have been able to convince himself Kerry just liked women more than men.

But he's not. Kerry's gay and somehow didn't want to ride Johnny seven ways to Sunday.

I don't know if that makes Johnny bi or not, but I really feel that Kerry wasn't the one who wanted to get into bed with Johnny, it was always the other way around.

~~~

I'm not convinced by this next part, but here's some tentative evidence to the contrary, if you wanna play devil's advocate:

In Kerry's sex scene, we see he likes something a little rough, and in some texts he mentions that he gets turned on when V is short with him (mainly thinking of the text convo you get if you start Phantom Liberty already dating Kerry).

Maybe Kerry likes when people play hard-to-get and ignore him, maybe he's got a bit of a humiliation kink going on, and maybe he got turned on by the way Johnny was always mean to him.

I feel like that's stretching things tho, we don't have a lot of evidence for that, just a text that was added after the initial release of the game, and a single slap in a cut scene.

Another thing to mention because I feel like I can't NOT mention it: why the fuck does Kerry look DIRECTLY into Johnny's eyes as he gets head from a fan on the stairs??? That kinda throws a curve ball into all of this and I'm not sure what to make of it ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[captainmartinisblog]

Roman Heritage – in the Rain!

Sunday 27th October 2024 – Tarragona, Spain (Day 2)

(NB This entry has been subsequently edited with additional notes and photos.)

We were joined in port this morning by Wind Star, built in 1986 and a bit bigger than us, with up to 148 passengers.

However, she has electric winches and her sails are all computer-controlled rather than manual like ours, but she’s much better company than that MSC monster we had yesterday! Don’t let the brief showing of the sun get your hopes up……

Today’s excursion was to see the Roman bits of the city that have either survived or been uncovered. The city of Tarraco was Hannibal’s capital but after the Romans captured it from the Carthaginians, it became one of Rome’s most important cities in Iberia.

There were only about 26 on our excursion this morning but I was the only English-speaking person in the group, so a handful (and the Germans can sometimes be a handful!) joined the English guide, although it didn’t stop them speaking German!

After a short panoramic drive through the city, we arrived at the Roman walls and the gate known as the Portal del Roser - they say because there was a Benedictine Monastery ('Rosary'?) but also that there was rose garden, neither of which are today in evidence!

Not much of the walls survive today but from this map and a model of the Circus and Forum, it was possible to see how ‘great’ Tarraco was in Roman times, supporting a population of some 40,000.

Much later, in the 12th century, the Cathedral was built on top of what was the Roman Temple of Augustus.

It boasts an octagonal crossing tower/dome and an incomplete 14th century façade, the work on which was halted by the plague. It was claimed at the time that the church was too high and had offended God, who sent the plague!

And as if to prove the point, this was when the heavens opened and it began tipping down with rain, so our half-hour of ‘free time’ was spent sheltering in the Cathedral, much to the annoyance of the locals, who don’t like tourists visiting on Sundays. Understandable, I guess.

Not far from the Cathedral in Carrer de la Merceria is Casa Corderet, the oldest known continuously-trading shop since 1751; a candle-maker's shop of all things!

We then visited a museum in part of the vaults beneath the great Circus, which adjoined the Forum, before seeing the few bits of the Circus that survive today.

Built in the 1st century AD, the Circus was vast at 325m long or 1,066ft and 115m or 377ft wide and held as many as 30,000 spectators. This was where the likes of Charleton Heston rode horse-drawn chariots called 'Quadrigas' in hair-raising races!

Sadly, apart from from this small section at one end of it, hardly anything remains above ground today. They want to uncover more but sadly, the city of Tarragona is bankrupt and can’t afford to.

However, the Roman city of Tarraco (as it was called back then) also had an Amphitheatre for gladiatorial fights and the burning of Christians etc (wholesome Saturday afternoon entertainment for the masses!). Rather more of its remains can be seen today....

Built in the early 2nd century, it was about 427m long (427ft) and about 102m (335ft) wide and housed around 15,000 spectators.

Our walking tour finished at the Mediterranean Balcony, a viewpoint at the end of the Rambla Nova, the modern city’s main avenue, overlooking the sea and the commercial port.

Returning to Sea Cloud II for lunch, we finally put to sea in the afternoon. However, the rain swept in again with such intensity that they cancelled the raising of the sails!

And just to put a further dampener on things, we’ve been told that there’s a bus drivers’ strike tomorrow, so my excursion to Girona is cancelled and I have to do another walking tour of Palamos instead! Captain’s Gala Dinner tonight though……!

[strawbubbysugar]

Hi there, I have a few questions!

-What is the name of Matt’s shop? Any details on what it kinda looks like/where it is in town?

-Also I’m guessing the house and shop are in Stewart, Minnesota, right? The little town of like ~500 people?

-What is the house/property layout that Bryn’s family gave to Matt? Who has which bedrooms, do they all have a similar schedule and eat breakfast together or anything? Do Wibble and Cammie help out around the house?

-Do Hello and Goodbye try to have approximately equal time controlling the body? What times do they have?

-Are there any “traditions” that June, Hello, and Goodbye have, like Taco Tuesday or Sunday Movie Night or Friday Game Night or anything like that?

-Does June interact with customers at the shop, or is that mostly a Matt thing? Does the shop do well in town, or is it kinda hard to stay afloat?

-Out of everyone living in the house, does anyone have any kind of allergy?

-Does June ever go out into town for fun in his free time, or does he mostly stay in cuz it’s hard to hide Hello and Goodbye in public?

Thank you!!

havent decided yet!! But I Imagine itd be in the next (bigger) town over, like a half hour drive, since there would be more people to actually be able to make enough money to survive

the loose inspiration is stewart, BC actually! :D Canada! but funnily enough yes the same amount of people!

havent decided much about it yet besides the fact that its a bigger house but very old, so lots of repairs are needed. Bryn is very uncomfortable around hello/goodbye at first so june/hello/goodbye stay on the other side of the house. Wibble and Cammie have their own shared room & yes they do help around the house! Cammie has found she enjoys folding laundry (warm, kitty tendencies) and Wibble likes sweeping (witch with her broom teehee)!

approximately equal time, but they no longer portion it out. if hello wants a turn he gets it, if goodbye wants one he gets it. I imagine its a lot more fluid now than it was before, with both of them able to take control of one part of the body to do things. ie) Hello is in control, and goodbye uses an arm to wave to someone passing by or grab something he wants to look at. If they get into an argument, June got them to start doing rock paper scissors to see who gets a turn. Goodbye tends to win more often (hello just wont stop picking scissors)

Oh absolutely. June was an only child and he is so excited to have a big family all under one roof. He and bryn are def the ones organizing a lot of that kind of stuff

June is the one interacting with customers, since matt isnt much of a people person. the shop struggled at first until they got enough good reviews that people started coming to them more often, now its doing fine! Not super super well, but livable! Bryn is a dentist so her income is def helping, and june does odd jobs on the side as well. Hello keeps begging to open a daycare (with june also begging) but its a firm no from matt. too risky.

Matt is allergic to pollen, and Piper has a bad peanut allergy

He does! While all 3 of them are a bit clingy, june is trying very hard to not spend all of his time at home. He takes trips to the nearby other towns to go to the mall, grab lunch, just hang out etc. Sometimes he'll take one of the animatronics, but only ever in the winter when theyre able to hide them easier. Other times if the animatronics are getting antsy june will facetime them while hes out so they can see. Cammie especially though is very bitter about needing to remain hidden, same with hello (though hello is more whiny about it rather than mad) - bonus: June really likes taking piper on "field trips" to the park, and piper brings the robots the little presents she finds (rocks, leaves etc. Goodbye has a collection of everything shes ever given him) - astro cadet is Piper's BEST friend