#dont speak to me about where mateos other arm is i dont want to hear it | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lovedroughtff · 5 years ago

Text

Chapter 1~ Emotions

It's over and done But the heartache lives on inside And who is the one you're clinging to instead of me tonight? And where are you now, now that I need you? Tears on my pillow wherever you go go I cry me a river that leads to your ocean You never see me fall apart In the words of a broken heart It's just emotions taking me over Caught up in sorrow Lost in the song But if you don't come back Come home to me, darling Don't you know there's nobody left in this world to hold me tight Don't you know there's nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight Goodnight, goodnight

Sienna

I sighed, getting off of the ground wiping the dirt off of my knees, and making sure that I did the same for Brielle.

“Mommy, I’m hungry.” She said as I picked her up and started to carry her away from the gravesite

“I know, me too Bri, we're eating at grandma’s and baba’s house.” I told her once we got to the car.

She started to wiggle from excitement in my arms, which made me laugh on such a bad day.

“Cmon silly girl, we gotta go!” I said strapping her into her seat. Once I made sure she was secure, I walked around to my side to get in the car. But I had to pray first.

“Lord, please give me the strength today. I really need it.”

I looked at the tombstone again, and got back into the car before I started to cry.

Leaving the cemetery was a struggle, but I knew that I couldn’t stay here without breaking down like I did every year when I came. Today was the day that the love of my life, Julian was brutally murdered. He was my high school sweetheart, and it’s been seven years since he was killed, yet it hurts like it was yesterday.

My sisters were cooing over my stomach and rubbing, as I just told them that I was pregnant. Even though, I’m only 20 right now, I couldn’t wait to have this baby. Julian and I decided to keep the pregnancy a secret, especially since once we told our parents we knew shit would hit the fan. But also, to make sure that nothing happened to the baby.

I was four months pregnant today, and barely showing, and glad for it.

“Does Mama and Baba know?” Kristen asked,

I nodded, “Baba nearly put JuJu through the wall in the kitchen. I had to stop him from hurting him.” Chuckling at the thought.

Baba is Persian for Dad.

“Of course he would, you know Baba doesn’t play about us.” Rocky laughed.

We were all light hearted and cracking jokes and making up baby names for my and Julian’s child, when his younger sister called me. I picked it up still laughing with my sisters.

“Hey Jilly-“ I paused and sat up once I heard her crying.

“Sienna, you gotta get to St. Mary’s Now!” She sobbed.

“What’s the matter Jilly?”

My sisters were now concerned at the nervousness in my face and how my body stiffened while being on the phone.

“He was shot Sienna! You gotta get here now!”

“W-who was shot?”

I started trembling at the thought, that I knew exactly who she was talking about.

I didn’t even hear her when she said Julian’s name, I just dropped the phone with tears running down my face.

He was dead by the time that I made it to the hospital. Brielle never got to meet her father, and doesn’t know his side of the family.

I blinked coming to as I looked up and noticed we were at my parent’s house. I don’t even know how I got here. I really was on auto-pilot today.

I looked in the backseat and saw Bri knocked out cold and I thought it was the cutest thing, she looked so much like Ju it was scary.

I picked her up and carried her into the busy house that had all of my siblings and my parents. I laughed when Bash, my 14 year old brother, nearly ran into me.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry Sissy.” He said calling my nickname once he realized who I was carrying.

“It’s fine Bash, can you take her to her room please? My daughter is heavy.” I smiled.

He nodded, “I think it’s a shame that she has a better room than I do, and I live here.” He laughed, carefully taking Bri out of my arms making sure that she didn’t wake up.

“Thank you Bash!” I said kissing his forehead, right before he ran up the stairs.

“No problem.”

When he was out of my sight, I let go of my exterior and frowned. I didn’t know how I was going to get through tonight like this. I was miserable and sad, all I wanted to do was fall asleep cuddling my daughter in my bed.

I left from the front of the house and started walking towards the living room and past the kitchen when I heard a commotion come from in there.

“Salvador! Please get out of my kitchen!!” I heard my mother yell, if she was calling Baba by his first name she really was pissed.

“Alright, Alright, I’m leaving!” He said with his hands in the air, retreating from the kitchen.

I laugh catching his attention.

“Oh Sienna! How’s my baby girl?” He asked engulfing me in the biggest hug. I smiled laughing at his excitement to see me and his thick accent.

“I’m fine Dad. Thank you for asking.” I mumbled in his chest, He gave the best hugs. I honestly felt myself smiling once he let me go.

“I know that Julian was a great love, and today is tough. But I know he is looking down on you and Brielle from above.” He spoke.

I nodded appreciating the words that he was telling me.

“You know I always liked him.”

That had me crying, “Baba, you know that was a lie, you tried to severely hurt him once you found out I was pregnant with Bri.”

He shrugged his shoulders and muttered things in Persian.

“Ay! Baba. What are you talking about!” Kristen yelled, I guess she heard him rambling when she came into the house.

“He said he liked Ju and I told him that was a lie,” I chuckled trying to hide my smile at the fact that my step-father was still rambling on.

Kristen just shook her head, “Baba, please. English.”

He rolled his eyes, “You understand me either way.”

We nodded, that was true.

“Salvador, Leave the Vivienne and Violet alone!” Ma shooed as she came out of the kitchen

He started speaking in Persian and waving his hands around, then walked off, still rambling. Mom was totally confused, but Kristen and I were damn near on the floor.

“What is he muttering on about.” Mom looked at us.

“Long story short, He said “Your Maman is crazy!” And started talking about you kicking him out of the kitchen.”

Mom rolled her eyes, “Your father is nuts!”

We both shook our heads and let mom rant while walking in the kitchen.

“Where you coming from Kris?” I asked her

She shrugged, “Daddy’s house, with all the other siblings. He says Hi and if you need anything to call him.”

I nodded, Her dad always cared for me.

My family dynamic is interesting to say the least. My mother is Valentina Harris- Jimenez and I don’t know who my real father is. My mom had me at 17 and from what she tells me, my father was extremely older than her and that when she found out she was pregnant at 16, she told my dad and he dropped the bomb on her that he was married with children, and walked out. She never saw him again. My mom doesn’t talk about my father and I don’t ask. Besides my mother and I, I have younger siblings consisting of four sisters and one brother.

Kristen is 2 years younger than me and her dad is Tony Hayes. He was like a father to me and then mom and Tony split up. He has 3 other kids by his wife.

Then there’s my baba. Salvador- But everyone calls him Mateo. He literally took Kristen and I under his wings and raised us with my mom. He also fathered my little sisters Rocky, Ari and my brother Bash.

Kristen and I love Baba like he is our own dad and he loves us just like were his own daughters.

“Hello, earth to Sienna!” Rocky snapped her fingers in my face

I rolled my eyes, Rocky and I hardly ever got along, she was always argumentative and I never understood that.

“Yes Raquel?” I was already annoyed.

She tightened her lips, “I was asking you if you were okay, being that today is the day your boyfriend got killed, but never mind then.” She walked past me, but not without bumping my shoulder.

“You don’t have to be a bitch all the time, Veronica.” Kristen called out.

“Dont give a shit Violet.” She called back

Ari was coming down the stairs with Bash and Brielle on her heels.

“I guess we know who got Baba’s temper.” She said

Ari came to hug me and Kristen picked up Brielle.

Before we could even talk, mom came out of the kitchen, “TIME TO EAT!”

I whispered in my head, “Thank you God”, because I could not answer another question about Julian.

Ace

Laying in my bed, I played in her perfect straight black hair that she had just got done. We were both sweaty and sticky, but it was fun to get this way with her.

“What are you thinking about?” Dahlia asked me.

I shrugged, “Nothing really, I like your hair like this.”

“Like what?” She shifted herself and the covers, so that she could look at me , but it just showed her naked body even more.

“I like it straight, I know you prefer curly hair but I like your hair straight.”

She made a mhm sound, and got up from the bed going into the bathroom. Sitting up, I watched as her fat ass swayed in my bathroom

“You like to tease me huh?” I called out

She poked her head out of the bathroom, “Of Course, why wouldn’t I, Papi?” She smirks going back into the bathroom,

Dahlia and I have had a very long on and off relationship since we were kids. We lost our virginities together, had pregnancy scares, went through a miscarriage, a lot of ups and downs. She cheated on me when we were younger as well, and I stopped fucking with her, for years. She broke my heart and made me become heartless, but I still love her.

A friends with benefits kind of situation. That’s all I can allow to happen, because I don’t trust her, but I still only want to be with her.

I heard the shower start, so I slipped on some boxers and shorts and made my way downstairs.

I was shocked when I saw Austin and Cash in my kitchen.

“Niggas, the keys I gave you are in case of emergencies only.” I was annoyed as shit that they were here. Especially since D is upstairs.

“This was an emergency. We were hungry.” Austin mumbled while shoveling my left over pasta in his mouth.

I wanted that, I smacked my lips.

“How long y’all been here.” I muttered while looking in my fridge.

“Long enough to hear you fucking some hoe.” Cash said, while looking at her phone.

“She’s not a hoe.”

I turned around to put the ingredients to my breakfast on the counter so I could start cooking.

“Who was it?” Austin asked.

“Don’t worry about it.” I mumbled.

I know that caused them to look at each other, because they got extremely quiet. After a few minutes of me cooking and Austin and Cash playing with each other, I was glad they didn’t ask me anymore questions.

“Ash!!” Dahlia called out, and I sighed, because I knew I was about to get an earful from my sister and best friend.

She came in the kitchen and stopped once she saw them.

Dahlia cleared her throat, “Hey Austin, Autumn.”

“What’s up D?” Austin said, he hugged her and I could tell that she had missed hanging out with him.

Cash didn’t say anything, except throw death glares at her.

Once her hug from Austin was over, she came and hugged me and kissed me on the lips. She whispered in my ear, “I had a great time last night and this morning, maybe next time we can do this without an audience.”

I smirked and laughed, “Lemme walk you out D.”

We walked out the kitchen and she grabbed the remaining of her stuff before walking out of the door. Leaving the house and going to my driveway, both of us were silent, until we reached the car. I spun her towards me and gave her a very passionate kiss. She moaned and I immediately wanted to bend her on the hood of her car and take her.

“D, you can stay.” I mumbled against her lips, grabbing her ass.

She shook her head, “I can’t I got shit to handle, and plus your sister would literally kill me.” She got out of my hold and started to get into the car.

“I don’t know why she hates me.” D mumbled.

That instantly pissed me off, “You know exactly why she hates you.”

Seeing me get irritated, she sighed, “I know, and I apologized many times Ash.” I didn’t respond.

“I love you.” She said looking at me, I didn’t respond again, I just stared at my feet.

I heard her hurt and looked up at her, “I love you too, call me when you get home.”

She nodded and got in and drove off.

I turned around to see Cash and Austin standing in my window. Cash looked pissed as fuck. I sighed knowing exactly where this was going.

Three hours, three hours is how long my sister yelled at me for messing with Dahlia. And she’s still fucking going.

“AUTUMN! FUCK! I get you! You don’t want me fuckin with Dahlia again. I get it.”

“No! You don’t because you were literally just fucking her a few hours ago. How could you put your dick in that bitch!” She yelled in my face.

She was taking this shit too far.

“Because I actually love her!! I wanted to marry her! You need to stop disrespecting her” I Yelled back

“How, How do you love her! You literally let this bitch walk all over you, she cheated on you constantly and here you are. Letting her back in.”

“Mind your fucking business Cash.” I mumbled.

“What? You mad? Cause you know I’m right? Huh.”

“Cash, stop.” Austin mumbled, He knew that if I got too mad that I would be on a rampage.

“No. You wanna talk about how you love that girl? That bitch didn’t have a miscarriage, she had an abortion and you know it.” Cash spat at me.

My head snapped to her, and before I could even do anything, Austin stood in front of me. He pointed to the stairs.

“Go cool off.”

I let out an angry groan, and stomped towards the stairs, I bumped shoulders with Autumn and walked to my basement door.

Before I left, “Both of y’all get the fuck out of my house and leave y’all fucking keys!” I yelled, and slammed the door.

12 notes · View notes