#dont look this is venting but also who cares yadda yadda
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#ramble tag#dont look this is venting but also who cares yadda yadda#i might be giving a bit too much lore in these#but its kinda for me also#kinda like a shitty diary too look back at when i feel a way#because i forget things#anyway#thinking about a friend of a friend who became my friend#and who i maybe cut out of my life a bit too harshly? over gender stuff mostly#i can only go off of my shitty memory but i might have overreacted i dont know#maybe he was a weirdo and a shithead maybe not the point was he was my friend#and i miss having that#there are not a lot of those left for me#(he also may or may not have had a crush on me i didn't notice but thats what people who i described him to think)#(i would not be able to tell unless he said so anyway)#(and in retrospect that might explain why he reacted baldly to some stuff)#(anyway)#the thing that prompted me writing this is#i remember most of his interests at the time#because i usually send stuff i think my friends will like to them#but all of this stuff is almost 4 years out of date#what if he also remembers me like that#and its also out of date#i dont even remember myself what my interests were at the time#so he has this warped image of me and doesn't even know my new name#I Stole His Fucking Name#Out Of Spite#god#what a mess#i keep thinking that i will see him on the street and i dont know how i would even react to that
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ESSAY TIME I love a ship please come hang out w/ me on this dinghy or like. dont because fates is awful and I canāt blame u for dodging that bullet but i just wanna scream because i love them and theyāre the fixation rn so 321 GO
i cant blame anyone for not really seeing this because their support is. Ok. Its alright. Not amazing, itās serviceable, better options are out there in fates I'll concede. Corrin has like. At least 3 other love interests who feel more canon LMAO but this isnāt about them
It's more from elsewhere in their characterization that really made me adore them and, as I mentioned in tags, a lot of this comes from how I write them which. Is largely filed under rp stuff right now but more ramble time on how i write them i guess dont forget to mark your free bingo space for throwing out large swaths of fates canon and writing.Ā Also we're scooting their canon support gently to the side because itās okĀ itās not the most offensive writing this nightmare scrap heap of canon has to offer but a massive missed opportunity.
PART 1- One (1) Corn, With a Side of Emotional Neglect
*makes vague gesture at Disney's Rapunzel* Corrin would have been so much better recieved if the devs just took some notes from you instead of writing such a flat character i swear.
Corrin in particular with how I write her is getting a pretty massive rework in the emotionally stable department because honestly I donāt believe she would be. like. She's not dumb, but she is naive, important distinction, and it ends up coloring her views a lot and I have a ramble on that over hereĀ on the inverse graph that is Corrinās confidence but to dissect where her attitudes came from:
Her family was limited to visits, and she has been directly/implicitly blamed for this for roughly a decade and a half, at least a decade, by not being an insane king's definition of strong enough to be with them. Bad memory makes her frail, swordsmanship isnāt up to par, doesnāt seem to offer much else in terms of skills unlike Xander, a Certified Badass(tm), Magic-oriented Leo and Elise, and Magically gifted but just plain ruthless Camilla. Sheās held at armās length from her family, and while her siblings may have always loved her and expressed that love as often as they could, theyāre not always there or a good yardstick to measure her progress with, and she had to always watch them go and likely wonder when they would come back, or if they even would.
As for our beloved butler and maids, being surrounded by servants was probably her most constant and consistent source of contact, and she does love them, but it can be very easy to wonder if they love her because they do or because it's their job to.
Corrin's faith in everyone around her and unwavering trust is there because any sort of doubt is basically redirected to. her. Because she is the dumbass who's still figuring the world out. She's hyper aware she's still learning and making naive decisions and she overcompensates that with "well what do I know" and not feeling really all that worthy to be Special Protagonist. She doubts herself before almost everything else.
Brief mention of Dragon arc because fates was dumb and neglected an entire arc for dragon feelings beyond chapter 5 and foreshadowing for Dad(tm) but I also write in an arc of the Dragon Is A Metaphor For Loving Yourself Faults And Trauma And All Love Yourself And You Can Control Yourself Dammit.
*Corrin hurt herself in her confusion!*
The way I write Corrin is not nearly as put together and confident as Canonā¢ļø Corrin is, at least for a good chunk of the plot. She fakes it till she makes it because she is a leader and being mopey will not get things done but sheās also very self critical and mopey on the inside and quite paranoid that people donāt actually like being around her and just. ball of stress and anxious hidden under Many a uwu that she doesnāt want to talk about because why should she complain her childhood wasnāt That Bad and if sheās mopey how can she set a good example and people donāt like debbie downers and look its fine its fine lmao
PART 2- Mr. Perfect
As for Mr. Subaki he puts a lot of time and effort into looking perfect. I emphasize that because he may very well have natural talent, but honestly it feels like a large amount of his perfection is just. Stressing himself out by planning for and rehearsing everything possible! God this anxious idiot I love him!!! He's sociable and agreeable, but I think with basically everyone itās. Skin deep. Heās charismatic Enough, and he digs a bit into the otherās history and personality if heās interested, but he never really lets the other reciprocate like a magician never revealing his fraudulent secrets.
Biggest problem with that is he can't open up and vent because that is to admit a flaw and no no cant have that we cannot have that so he's just. Not sure who to turn to and has trouble being emotionally honest- even to himself. He just! Doesnt let himself have fun or relax; all perfect all the time baby. Thereās basically no one who he could consider a close and trusted friend who can love him flaws and all. The closest would be Sakura and Hana and welp. gotta keep things professional and itās not like Hana really expresses a sense of understanding and patience when theyāre fiercely competitive with each other.
Thereās probably a lot of muttering to his pegasus while heās cleaning her hooves or braiding her mane, or staying up late thinking about how narrowly disaster was and wasnāt avoided that day but he. Also doesnāt really vent and also feels that imposter syndrome ofĀ āIām honestly awful how did I even make it here.ā
and it stinks because I think at his core he is a very sweet and caring guy and a massive dork, but he just plops himself on the edge of a pedestal and gives himself no room to be himself or anything less than perfect and is likely on the cusp of impending burnout.
you dumb anxious idiot i have S-Ranked you every fucking time I open this godforsaken game I didnāt even fucking plan for this
PART 3- (Patrick Warburton impression) āOh yeah, itās all coming together.ā
So our characters and stage are set. We got FE Fates (Iāll default to Rev), we got my views when writing these two, so what next? What is the general plot I imagine since weāve gently scooted aside the canon support chain?
The dumbasses-to-be think theyāre out of each otherās league.
For Subaki, it is plot-irrelevant background character falling in love with the protagonist, which yields the exact sort of pining youād imagine: man you are super cool and hit all my standards but Iād be dreaming if you felt the same about me. Sheās sweet, she takes charge, she can fight for herself well enough, has he mentioned sheās sweet? He can actually relax a bit around her which is really odd but I guess thatās what happens when your personal skill is literally calledĀ āSupportiveā. Oh yeah and also his Ladyās older sister which oof. Sakura? In law???? Hinoka in law???? Takumi in law?????????? ryoma in law oh gods.
For Corrin, itās Mr. Prince Charming right there and heās very nice and Sakura is saying so many nice things about him but wow sheās. a princess from a country that has consistently terrorized his and on top of that might a well have been raised under a rock!!! And she picks up details and nuances in people remarkably well, but she overthinks them. She can pick up that Subaki- while very polite and friendly -isnāt being entirely forthcoming about what heās thinking or feeling, but she canāt pin down exactly what it is, and makes the educated guess that he's just being nice because sheās Sakuraās sister or something.
And theyāre friendly. They help each other out a bit. Thereās tension, sure, but no one really comments on it (except for everyone making bets in the bg). They donāt really yield on their internal messes because Corrin knows sheās a leader and canāt really do that and distracts herself with believing in everyone around her, Subaki just flat out would rather do literally anything besides admit heās messed up anywhere or open up. So feeling are put on a low simmer for awhile.
Of course they fall in love, and it almost gets messed up because when Subaki requests to talk with her in private to confess, she immediately assumes heās going to tell her that heās not interested. Her simmer roars into a boil because sheās been under Protagonist Stress ON TOP OF having a crush sheās confident wonāt be reciprocated, so she snaps quite a bit because that has all been shoved in a bottle and she just wants to get the mess over with if heās just going to tell her very nicely that her company is lovely but hes not interested it hurts a lot to think that but its fine you donāt have to settle.
But the thing is being emotionally vulnerable like that, pointing out sheās scared too of always not being enough and living up to expectations, to finally get that off her chest, spurs him into it, too. Because she gets it. She honest to god gets it even if she bought into the lie heās perfect she understands. Oh, yeah, she also reciprocates feelings thatās really excellent too. Like Subaki probably makes a lot of fuss about a bunch of ultimately meaningless details and having āstandardsā and yadda yadda gods help whatever poor soul asks him to pull out the list of traits of his ideal partner, but I think at the end of the day if heās looking for love most of all, like a lot of people he just wants someone who he can just. be himself around. Who likes it when heās being himself!
And they both learn that yeah maybe theyāre more flawed than theyāve been lead to believe, but it starts to not matter at all because they still try really hard and everyone makes mistakes. Theyāre both here to say itās ok your best is enough, YOU are enough. They both think theyāre amazing regardless of their mistakes and love to see each other smiling and succeeding and just make. a nice little bubble of comfort. Theyāre stubborn and supportive, they learn how to poke and prod the bad moods away be it making a nice cup of matcha and talking it out or laughing at a tiny, meaningless mistake and repeating it to keep that feeling of dread away. Also they both spoil their partners regardless of who they end up with you canāt @ me on that they both do it which means guess what mega spoil time. And long hair on both just means they can braid each otherās hair no problem... waaaaaa.... Also early rise Subaki and late rise Corrin so thereās always a sleepy fight in the morning because UGH this is early you keep saying iāll get used to it but im not i need a kiss first if you want me to be up this early. Subaki is better at logic and planning than Corrin, and Corrin keeps things optimistic and has a good gut for when to take an improvised risk. Theyāre always swapping places on whoās holding the other back from a fight that isnāt worth it because some asshole insulted the other, they mediate each other and will fight anyone who even harms a hair on the otherās head. They give and they give back and they work together perfectly.
And when it comes to the kids that bubble expands and they make sure they all have the tools to just take a deep breath and remember itās okay Mama and Papa love you so much and youāre going to be amazing no matter what you do. Corrinās got the best stories to tell and Subaki tucks the blankets in just right. Theyāre good parents with a lot of patience and plenty of mental health wisdom which is good because, as my mom would say,Ā ābad brain chemistry is my badā.
Like UGH I love them. I love them a lot. A good chunk of this is me making canon better thank me fates devs
Part 4- Katie All of This is Out of Your Noggin What About Canon
(DBZ abridged vc) WHAT ABOUT CANON but ok here have some canon quotes
āThe two spent the rest of their lives together. Corrin ruling as the wise Queen of Valla. Subaki adapted quickly to royal leadership and became a great source of support for his wife. ā - Revelation route ending
āI feel like the pressure's off when I'm with you. I don't have to be perfect.ā āYou'll never be lonely as long as I'm around. Just call me and I'll come running.ā - Friendship bonding quotes but also consider waaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
āThis might sound corny, but I think you're my soulmate.ā - What he says when he is married to you and yes that is corny and its perfect
hot spring is dumb fanservice BUT if you can get the good RNG to get them both in thereĀ Ā āA shared bath warms not just my bones, but my heart as well.ā āI-I suppose so...I just wonder if it's right to be so happy...ā (emphasis mine) IT ABSOLUTELY IS BE HAPPY AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
also one of his quotes when u stop by your quarters isĀ "Ah, welcome home, dear. Kick off those shoes and relax. You're with me now!" and you absolute himbo your wife doesnāt fucking wear shoes!!!!!!!!!
Part 5- Iām done Iāve yelled into the void good night enjoy a ship please be excited for the fic I have on the backburner that I will get out there one of these days but I want it to be perfect so RIP me I guess
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