#don't take this too seriously 🤪 idk as if anyone's going to??? idk i'm a mess lmao bye

[n0heart]

1,14,27,29,30,37,41,42,43,49,64,77,88,91

1: When did you lose your virginity?

i was 18, with my first and only boyfriend, we were in my room (that's about all i can remember)

27: Early morning sex or late night sex?

well you know i don't exist early in the mornings but i'd probably go for a bit of groping, grinding my ass against them and have them slowly finger me and then fuck me in the morning (back to chest) and then the full eLaBoRaTe thing in the late night, like involving kinks and such

29: Favorite body part on the same sex?

TITSSSSSSSSS TITS i'm sorry am i sounding too basic I JUST LOVE TITS

30: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don't want anyone to find:

probably any of my toys lol

37: How much fapping is too much fapping:

i haven't seen anyone using that term since idk 2011/2012 i feel old 🥴 uhhh well i'd say the moment it starts to actually hurt and you're more in pain or uncomfortable than getting pleasure out of it then maaaaybe you need to take a break

41: When was the first time you masturbated:

FIRST time???? i genuinely can't remember, properly? like actually getting to cum and all? i'd say 14/15, i had been trying stuff before that age tho

43: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside?

does this mean outside as in outdoors? because the answer is never

49: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?

ARE YOU SERIOUSLY ASKING ME THIS WHEN YOU KNOW DAMN WELL IT'S ONE OF MY BIGGEST TURN ONS EVERRRRRR I'M FERAL

64. What is your method of masturbation? (ie. toys, clitorial, prostate)

either fingers or toys but focused on my clit, she's the main character always

77. Which wet dream was your favorite?

i don't remember ever having a wet dream but i did have many MANYYYYY hot sexual ones, one of the best was one of my favorite singers choking me and domming the shit out of me lol

88. Have you ever confessed to someone that you got an erection over them? What about masturbated to them?

i have, multiple times 😌 they all thought/think it's an honor lmao

91. Have you ever had a friends with benefits? Are they still beneficial?

nope actually, knowing me i'd probably end up catching feelings 🤪

thank you babes i love youuuu <3

[just-some-random-blogger]

You made me stop what I was doing because of how you said this was the worst thing you've ever written. And of course since I'm all up in everyone's business I'LL be the judge of that, thank yew

I gotta say ange, you really took gas and light and ran with it cuz if this is your worst 💀💀💀✋✋✋ congradufuckinglations you won

ITS SO FUNNY COZ WHEN I GOT TO THIS PART

He cut you off before you’d had a chance to speak. “I suppose we should get this over with”, he said stoically, nodding his head towards the bed, “On your belly”, he instructed.

I was immediately WAIT I've read this before

And then RANNNNNNN to see the older reblogs

Well well well isn't it just so me to snap 🤪

I feel like before I continue, I have to say, your opinion on your work is totally valid. as a person with superior taste, we respect the wrong opinions of others, but we don't know her personally. But again this is your work and if you say this is bad I say SLAYYYYY girl give us nothingggg

Anyway I have to keep going because I reread everything before rereading my reblog. can I just say #1, I personally don't like rereading stuff ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ idk why it feels like a chore when I do it. The only reason why I read this was because I thought I didn't lol BUT even then I did reread, it's not a chore to read at all 🫶 (minus the part they make up and you'll know why lmao)

#2 whenever I reblog fics, since I'm in the moment n if im angry at the characters especially, I'm always so worried the author might think I'm committing a hate crime against them. So whenever you say you LOL at my reactions I'm always like ???? Fr???? BUT THEN I REREAD MY COMMENTS IM LIKE ✋✋✋ why would anyone take this goofy ass fucker seriously DAFAQ HAHAHAH

Anyway lolololol

“Forgive me”, Aemond said matter of factly, before roughly forcing himself into you in one thrust.

HELL NAW DAFAQ YOU RAT ASS HO

You remained still, not daring to move, as he composed himself. You didn’t dare to look at him, too shocked by what had just transpired to do anything but lay prone on the bed.

Happy marriage

“Hopefully my seed will quicken and we will not have need to repeat this”, Aemond muttered. While trying to keep his tone formal and respectful, you detected a hint of strain to his voice. He was holding something back, but you were unsure of what. “If your moon’s blood does arrive then be sure to tell me, we will need to try again.”

Respectfully, I hope you go blind

The following morning when you awoke your eyes were puffy from crying. The prospect of being trapped in a loveless marriage weighed heavily upon you. You hissed as you lowered yourself into the steamy waters of the bath your handmaidens had drawn for you. The heat of the liquid hitting the soreness between your legs made you wince, and brought fresh tears to your eyes as memories of the previous night came flooding back to you.

Fun fact I called her beef stroganoff in my previous reblog and why have I stopped using that? My beloved beef stroganoff I will protect you from your one eyed husband

If Aemond wanted this marriage to be a mere formality then you’d maliciously comply.

MALICIOUS COMPLIANCEEE RAHHHH 👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹👹

A mixture of relief and regret washed over you. On the one hand, it would have been nice to carry a small part of Aemond. Proof of the only time you’d ever experienced the touch of the man you loved, painful as it was. On the other, you were grateful not to be bringing a child into such a strained and loveless environment.

My heart bleeds for you

He hovered by the door, regarding you quietly. The expression on his face was unreadable. In spite of your anger, you still found him devastatingly handsome and silently cursed yourself for it.

Disrespectfully, I hope you implode. I'm a girls girl but girl what do you see in him

Aemond inhaled deeply, looking down at his feet before returning his gaze back to you. “I am sorry to hear”, he spoke softly, appearing to choose his words carefully, “I will give you time for your...blood...to be over and then...we will try again.”

Oh wow thank you so much that's what I've been needing 🥰🥰🥰🥰 you're so thoughtful I got you a cup of bleach!! Drink it 🫶🫶

“Don’t trouble yourself”, you spat.

LOUDDERRRR

“I’m saying no!” You practically shouted, “I don’t want to try again. Whatever this is, I don’t want it! I don’t want to bring a child into this!”

SHE SAID NOOOOOOO LET HER GOOO

Written in High Valyrian the note read: “I will petition my mother to dissolve our marriage. I hope this is pleasing to you - Aemond.”

You bore me

“I’m doing what is best for you”, he explained softly, “I cannot bear to see you this unhappy. I will tell my mother your virtue is still in tact, so your chances of a more appropriate match will not be affected.”

Loathe. Revulsion.

“This doesn’t make any sense”, your voice wobbled, “Don’t you want to try?”

He's not worth your breath. He's not even worth a meme reaction.

“I have tried!” Aemond snapped in frustration, pinching the bridge of his nose, as he paced, “I’ve kept away from you, I’ve given you space and yet still you are miserable. There is nothing more to be done.”

RESIGNED.

K. Maybe the 'worst thing I wrote' part comes from them making up right after an entire Armageddon but then again that's just me and I'm a petty bitter queen and I think the fuck not choke on the consequences of your actions.

I truly agree with past when she said aemond deserves to be killed by daemon in the show because of this fic. Past me ate with that.

Other than that 10/10. I, a mortal, could never.

Unbearable

Warnings: Angst, smut Words: 3.5k

Summary: Your marriage to Aemond Targaryen is a political one, to strengthen the bond between both your houses, or so it seems. You’ve loved Aemond from afar for as long as you can remember, but now find yourself trapped in a marriage where the feeling, in your opinion, is not reciprocated.

Keep reading

[moreofem]

I haven’t watched The Bear yet so I could be very wrong but Carmy seems like the type to like it when you talk back to him just a bit like it would grate his nerves but when you push he can push back until idk he ends up bending you over like “if you wanted me so bad you could have just said so” and I….I’m blaming you for making me thirst but goddamn I’m real excited to see the hype for real! 😌

OH YEAH

Naauurrr because I will inflict the Carmy thirst on everyone idgaf 🤪🤪

There's a lot of pushing and screaming until the breaking point in this show, and Carmy definitely participates in that looolll. And since he's the 1st chef and he gives out orders, he's always pushing to see how long someone will defy his authority. And you being a stubborn little shit, you just like riling him up

It all started in the morning, with you refusing to do the vegetable prep because you were too busy doing sauce prep. Carmy had already annoyed you beforehand, waking you up at 2 am because of his insomnia, so now you wanted to make him pay

"Ok then Chef, do a double prep!"

"Carmen you can clearly see that I can't do double prep right now!"

"Oh my god, just say Yes Chef, chef.?"

"Chef. I'm sorry, but I can't fucking double prep, Chef."

"Chef; stop giving me an attitude. We all have fucking work to do. Tina is doing a double prep too so I don't know why the fuck you can't do double prep!"

"Carmen just shut the fuck up and let me do my thing! Damm!"

Both of you go at it, all while cooking and prepping, until Sydney comes in to calm the whole situation down.

"I told y'all it wasn't a good idea to have an almost married couple in the kitchen, but of course, no one is gonna listen to good old Richie uh?"

You and your boyfriend groaned and said in unison: "fuck off Richie"

Later in the day, Carmen calls you in his office for a meeting, clearly annoyed with your antics. When you come in, you're greeted with the delicious sight of Carmy spread out on the chair, his fingers running across his thighs and through his hair.

"Babe. You know I'm busy, what's u-"

"Really, y/n, for the sake of all of us, stop trying to question everything I ask you to do. It completely breaks the dynamic of the day! You're here, giving me-"

"Oh fuck off Carmen! You knew damn well I couldn't double prep this morning! Those sauces take forever and I need to watch the temperature the whole time!Because the thing is, if I double prep, then I can't properly focus on the sauce, and if I dont then I ruin the sauce, and then, you're fucking rude to me cause *Oh my god chef, start over.*; like it wasn't the thing I was about to fucking do!"

Your voice pitched high, and your chest was heaving, and if he was being completely honest, Carmy's brain stopped working and he was thinking with his dick, which was straining against his jeans at the most inconvenient of times.

“Baby…”

“No no no Carmy, don’t baby me. You and your huge ego can go fuck each other because you don’t follow the rules of *no screaming* at me in the kitchen! You don’t! You just prance around cause you’re the owner of the place and you don’t have any consideration for anyone else than you and your dick and you seriously need to back off cause you’re embarr-“

He slowly got up, stalking you down and back you against the table.

“What else baby? Tell me more…”

You scoffed

“Oh you fucker. You’re getting one outta this huh? You dirty fuck! I’m trying to have a serious-

“More or so rambling, not very serious”

“A SERIOUS conversation with you, and you just wanna get your dick sucked!”

“Bae. Baby. Love of my life. I know that if I put my hands down your pants, you’d be fucking wet too. I know you get a ride outta this too, so don’t try me.”

His tattooed hand grabbed your neck, and a devilish grin formed on his face.

“Carmy… baby, we don’t have time for th-“

“Shhh, lemme make you feel good, ‘kay?”

You nodded sheepishly, biting your lip. He turned you around, so that your ass was against his hips.

“Fuck.. you drive me crazy Carmy…”

He kissed your neck, pulled your pants down, and took his dick out. He swiped the tip against your pussy, grinning when your juices were already glistening.

“Huh. You’re so wet, just like I thought. If you wanted me so bad you could’ve just said so… now try to be quiet baby cause I’m about to rock your shit…”

—

EHEHEEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEH😈😈😈