#don't mind me just..day dreaming about scenarios and what ifs

[iona-xiv]

In the small, damp, and dark room that once thrived as a bar, Iona surveyed her surroundings. A sigh escaped her lips, but she quickly gathered her confidence – the desire to carve her own path, earn her own keep, and be the master of her destiny. The establishment before her is weathered, its age evident in its rust and dilapidation. Undeterred, Iona is resolute in her determination to breathe new life into this humble bar, transforming it from a faded relic into a flawless haven of her own making. "Alright! Let's get to work!"

-------------------

The side quest.

I have been messing with the idea for a solo RP (meaning nothing connected to my main partners as of currently, normally we always combine storylines to make all our characters connect in some way) of Iona owning a bar where she has/wants to earn money to fix up the fixer-upper. Basically a 2 broke girls but it's 1 broke bun and a bar.

in her mission to improve the establishment, Iona takes on odd jobs, ventures into misadventures, and interacts with patrons who sporadically visit once the restorations begin. However, despite her best efforts, she consistently finds herself losing or spending the majority of her earnings before making substantial investments in the much-needed renovations.

[ghostofhyuck]

NCT Dream as Taylor Swift songs. (angst version)

AN: Another NCT Dream as Taylor Swift songs ;> enjoy!

Mark Lee ; Back to December

And then the cold came, the dark days When fear crept into my mind You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye

Starting strong with Back to December. CRIES. Mark is so Back to December-coded, like literally. He's that guy that you'll love at your very worst that's why you regret breaking up with him. Like!!! He was there for you, he gave all of him to you and you ended up hurting him. And your breakup with him was so HARSH that you know that you hurt him so much, and as much as you two are civil, you know that there is a wall between you too. CRIES AGAIN. 

Huang Renjun ; Cardigan

But I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss I knew you'd haunt all of my what-ifs The smell of smoke would hang around this long

Okay but, in this scenario, Renjun is your cardigan. He's a hopeless case of falling in love with someone who could never love him back. And as much as it hurts him, he still ends up going after you whenever you need him, and it didn't matter to him!! Because he loves loves you so much even though at the end, he might thrown again like an old cardigan. 

Lee Jeno ; Say Don't Go

Why'd you have to (why'd you have to) Make me love you (make me love you)? I said, "I love you" (I said, "I love you") You say nothin' back

Idk how to describe how much Jeno fits Say Don't Go so much. He's the type who will lead you onto something, whisper those sweet words, and will make you feel like he loves you so much. But then he doesn't, and you're there helpless, wondering if all of it are real. And to stop your daydreaming, you walked away first BUT you waited for him to chase after you, but it the end, he didn't and it hurts you so much. 

Lee Donghyuck ; Would've, Could've, Should've

I can't let this go, I fight with you in my sleep The wound won't close, I keep on waiting for a sign I regret you all the time

I know Would've, Could've, Should've's meaning is different BUT HEAR ME OUT. I chose this for Haechan because it fits him so much, something about being a relationship with him can be a destruction of you too. You were clueless of yourself when you're with him and when you two broke up, you're left ruined because of him!!! And years passed and you thought you're alright, but the wounds are still open and you couldn't do nothing about it. 

Na Jaemin ; Champagne Problems

I never was ready, so I watch you go Sometimes you just don't know the answer 'Til someone's on their knees and asks you

It's a YOU problem with this one. You love Jaemin so much, he's everyone's ideal man and a perfect husband material. It's just, you're not ready for marriage and family. So not only did you rejected him, but you also broke up with him because you know that it's for the best. So you watched him from afar, engaged to a girl who probably suits him better than you. She'll be a perfect wife for Na Jaemin. 

Zhong Chenle ; You're Losing Me

I gave you all my best me's, my endless empathy And all I did was bleed as I tried to be the bravest soldier

I think Chenle suits You're Losing Me because I feel like he's the type who's very confident with his relationship, and while it's low-maintenance it slowly fades away. There's no sparks, no more thrill, and you two are slowly becoming strangers living under the same rooftop. He becomes clueless, and you're on the verge of giving up fighting your relationship with him. Until one day, you did. You broke up with him.

Park Jisung ; Happiness

Haunted by the look in my eyes That would've loved you for a lifetime Leave it all behind And there is happiness

Happiness is so underrated tbh. Jisung is happiness-coded because it felt like a breakup that ended up civil because you two knew that your relationship is not working anymore. And as you two separate ways, there's relief and happiness. But still, there's a price of it, and that is your relationship with Jisung.

[kyu-nee]

Calling for a SKZ roleplay!

Hi!! As you can see my name is Kyu, currently 24, and starting my summer break for the year! With only my part-time job to keep me busy during the summer months I am very free to amble about all day thinking of my eight favorite brainrot men and dreaming up little plots for them. Since writing fanfiction is nice but not as engaging and entertaining as roleplaying, I'm looking for someone who might want to chill out, go a little (a lot) nuts over them and write out some scenarios! 🍃

Talking about my roleplaying style: I'm a novella writer. That means you are getting at least 1-7k+ replies from yours truly, and it also means I am thirsting for someone who goes just as crazy with the internal monologue, the backflashes, the in-depth character exploration as I do! If I'm fed two listless little paragraphs in response to a 5k post then my motivation just flags. My grammar is (this comes off as snobby, I know) flawless except for the occasional typo or slip of the keyboard, and I like to think of my writing as rather engaging. What I really need from a roleplay partner is communication, activeness and friendliness, though. I'm very energetic sometimes and can ramble for hours about possible what-ifs in our roleplay, so I would very much like someone who wants to become friends, strikes up conversation as much as I do, and generally doesn't mind rants and fawning! 🍃

As far as topics and genres go: I love me some fluff and romance but angst, hurt, comfort, drama, misunderstandings are sooo good! I'm all in for dead dove themes and smut also, so long as we have a decent plot for it to fit into! If we get to talking I am also more than happy to provide a list of my kinks and no-nos for you to skim over and see if we'd be compatible in that regard. My absolutely favorite verses to play are omegaverse or hybrid verses, in which I am a strong stickler for the version where omegas/prey hybrids are naturally AFAB no matter their gender. 🍃

I play on Discord in private servers for easy organization and comfort!

Let's get to the (I assume) interesting part for you! I am generally all-in on every single member/member ship (NOT looking for any oc/member or self-inserts as that doesn't vibe with me at all and I don't like the notion of it) but of course I have some favorites, those being MinChan, MinSung, JeongChan, ChanBin, ChanSung and JeongLix! Still, I am very open to suggestions as I love all of my boys and am excited to play them, also as a pack, OT8, or any variation including however many of the members! 🍃

There are some plots I've been mulling over, most of them little snippets or vibes more than actual plotlines, but I'll try to piece them together coherently for your perusal once we get to talking and sort out or preferences! 🍃

Please shoot me a message that possibly also introduces yourself and I'll get back to you with haste! Will not be considering Likes/Reblogs since that low level of initiative and engagement is not what I'm looking for!🍃

Have a lovely day and thank you so much for reading through all this! 💖🍃

[oswaldsleftbicep]

Hello and a wonderful day,

I don't know why I am so cruel today but could you do a scenario where Mc breaks up with the brothers but just as a prank. I am just- curious and a rather good mood today🤷🏻‍♀️

the brothers + a gn!so who brings up ending their relationship

this is so mean,,,, i kinda love it >:) fr tho please don't do this to your real partners, it's cruel. i did end up changing this just a little bit cuz i personally think breaking up with someone as a joke is too much, so this is more like the reader brings up the idea of ending their relationship with the boys. so it's not really a prank, more like a very serious conversation that wasn't made to be taken all that serious? idk you'll see

genre: angst, hurt/comfort

cw: break up talks, arguments and confrontations, written portions, spoilers for levy's route, very long

Lucia

❧ you've been in nightmare for well over a year at this point and you're very happy with your decision to stay

❧ lucia got a little insecure the first few months after the red moon, worrying about if you were really ok with living in a completely foreign world, ok with him, but after reassurance from you he was able to see how happy you are

❧ and life was great with the two of you, you got along great and supported each other through everything

❧ however, there was one dinner party you and lucia attended that was hosted by a very close family friend, and she knew about your situation and what you gave up to stay with lucia

❧ she had asked you the rude question, "do you ever wonder what your life could have been if you just returned home? or have you ever wondered if lucia truly was the one and if you made a grave mistake? surely a month was too soon to decide these important things..."

❧ this made the two of you freeze up a bit; this was hardly a topic you discussed anymore, except maybe after a really bad dream or if you were incredibly homesick

❧ you were quick to laugh it off, although it was an uncomfortable laugh, explaining to the woman how you were quite sure about your decision and have no regrets whatsoever, reaffirming how lucia was the one and only person for you, in this world or your previous one

❧ something about your tone made her change subjects quickly, but that whole interaction was stuck on repeat in lucia's head for the next few days

❧ it was stuck in your head, too, but for different reasons

❧ lucia was starting to get that insecure and doubtful feeling he had when this all started; you on the other hand were just caught up in the what ifs

❧ so one night a few days after the dinner, you and lucia are getting ready for bed when you start the dreaded conversation

"hey, babe, can i talk to you about something?" you ask him

he hesitates for a half second before responding, "of course, anything."

you fiddle with the end of your night shirt for a bit, thinking about how to bring this up delicately. "well, i've been thinking about what that friend of yours was saying at the dinner a few days ago," you swallow before continuing, "what if i really did make a mistake?"

lucia feels his heart drop at that statement; you've finally voiced what he's been fearing deep down for all these months. his mind is racing, yet he can't seem to think of something, anything to say in response. he cautiously takes a seat on the bed next to where you're leaning up against a pile of pillows, "well, uhm... do you feel like you made a mistake?"

he holds his breath waiting for your response. your fingers have moved to picking at a loose thread on the duvet cover as you think deeply about what you feel.

"i don't think so? i mean, i do wonder what my life could have been if i went back, and," you take a quick breath and finish your sentence quietly, "sometimes i wonder if you were the right choice for me."

the room itself feels like it's holding its breath. everything is dead quiet while lucia processes what he's just heard come from the mouth of the love of his life.

"do you," he begins, but hesitates to continue, "do you think you made a mistake being with me?"

you whip your head toward him, looking at him shocked at what he's just asked. you try to tell him you don't think that in the slightest, but he just cuts you off.

"would you have rather chosen someone else? or have you just gotten tired of me by now?" his accusations hurt you, but nothing hurts more than seeing his state right now. you've never seen him look so insecure, tears beginning to pour down his face, he's hunched over, hands running through his hair leaving it a wild mess, his breathing is picking up and you're worried he's going to have a complete breakdown if you don't stop this soon.

"lucia, wait, that's not what i-" you begin, but he's quick to cut you off again.

"don't tell me it's one of the angels. you know what they're like, how could you fall for one of them?"

"lucia, listen!" you yell over him, finally getting him to stop talking as he looks at you with wide eyes. "enough of this, please! it's not like that, not in the slightest. why would you think these things?"

"you said you weren't sure about me, about us! how else was i supposed to take that?" he responds, raising his voice slightly. he's quiet for a few seconds as he catches his breath, then he asks in a quiet voice, "do you want to break up with me?"

you look at him shocked for a moment; you've never seen him like this. sure you've been there at some of his lowest points, but right now he appears more like a little kid than a future king. he's looking at you with wide, cautious eyes, head down slightly and shoulders up as if he's ready to duck and cover, face stained with tears and eyes red and puffy from his sobbing.

he takes your silence as a yes and it feels like the floor just came out from under him, like he could collapse at any second. all of his doubts in regards to your relationship were always about him and if he was the right choice for you. you are his whole world, nothing would be right without you, and to hear you turn his doubts into reality makes him want to give up on everything, right then and there.

"you dummy," you say to him in a soft tone, moving from your spot to wrap your arms around his sunken shoulders, holding him tight against you. "you are the most important person to me, why would i ever give that up? i didn't back then, and i wouldn't now. not for anything."

he lets your words sink in, and after a few seconds he turns to face you and hugs you back twice as hard. he buries his face into the crook of your neck and sobs, begging you not to leave him, to never do that to him again. you hold him close to you, running your hand through his hair and comforting him.

❧ so yeah his mind jumps to the idea that you would be having second thoughts about staying with him in nightmare, or even that you'd regret being with him in general

❧ when he gets insecure like that he jumps to conclusions, and when he bottles things up he's prone to breaking down, especially if it's an important matter

❧ you spend the rest of the night consoling him until he falls asleep; you'll save the rest of the conversation for the morning

Levy

❧ you already know how i'm gonna start this lmao

❧ so the two of you were reading next to each other, all comfy in your chairs and lost in a good story

❧ and it just so happens that in your book, two characters go through a pretty nasty break up with one another and it got you thinking a little bit

❧ your mind went back to any break ups you've previously gone through, whether it was with a partner or a close friend, whether it happened to you or you had to help someone get through one

❧ as someone who's been dumped two and a half times, it's not fun lol

❧ and naturally your mind started to drift toward the unthinkable: what would happen if you and levy ever ended things?

❧ the thought alone made you shudder; you and levy were practically soulmates, especially after all you went through to be with one another. would either one of you ever want it to be over?

❧ you've stopped paying attention to your book by now, and your eyes drift over to your loving boyfriend, admiring how engrossed he is in the book he chose for today

❧ you recognized the book, it's one he's read a few times before, so surely he wouldn't mind if you spoke your mind to him

❧ and man did you not waste a second getting to the point lmao

"hey, babe, do you think we'll ever break up?"

he flinches a bit, whether it's from the sudden noise or the question you aren't sure, and he whips his head toward you, eyes wide and a shocked expression on his face.

"um not if i can help it," he declares, sounding much like a proper victorian lady who was just asked something scandalous, "why the hell would you ask me something like that?"

you bite back a laugh at his reaction before continuing, "this book just got me thinking about break ups and, naturally, my mind drifted to us."

this didn't make him feel much better. "what do you mean 'naturally'? is there something wrong with us?" he asks, beginning to panic a bit.

"i mean think about it," you start, really not helping him calm down, "we've had a lot of rough patches in our relationship; any other couple would've broken things off by now."

"but we made it through all that," levy rushes to point out and defend your relationship. "besides, it's not like any of it was that bad, right?"

"babe, you committed treason against your own brother," you point out bluntly, "some may view that as pretty bad."

he sputters a bit, shocked by your audacity to bring that up. "i thought you said you had my back on that one! that all was forgiven and we could move on!" he sighs in exasperation. "where are you even going with this?"

"look, all i'm saying is that it's a miracle we've made it this far in our relationship," you state simply, lazily throwing your hands up in defense.

he pauses for a bit, taking in what you just said and praying that you weren't actually taking these thoughts seriously.

"have you ever, like, seriously thought about," he swallows and takes a deep breath before continuing, "breaking up with me?"

the way his voice cracks at the end of his question makes your heart drop and change your tone immediately.

"what? no, baby, of course not. i mean maybe things were a bit rough at the beginning but look at where we are now! i've never been happier."

"see, you say those things but keep bringing up the past and all my dumb mistakes. clearly they're still affecting your image of me, and maybe of our relationship?" he argues, becoming insecure of himself toward the end of his statement.

"levy, those things don't bother me anymore," you say trying to comfort him, "i know you've changed your ways and learned from your mistakes. none of that is who you are."

"i was only able to do those things because of you; you gave me a second chance," he goes quiet for a few seconds, "and i don't know where i'd be if you hadn't done that."

"in exile, probably," you joke, wincing lightly at the glare he sends you.

"exactly," he says with a harsh edge, "us breaking up would be very bad, so please, let's agree to never let that happen and move on with our day."

he turns back to his book, but you can tell he isn't paying attention to it anymore, your words circling his mind instead. you do feel bad now, his mistakes are a sensitive topic neither of you talk about much, and for you to bring them up out of nowhere on top of the idea of ending your relationship was too much for him to handle.

you set aside your own book and make your way closer to where levy is sitting. it's only when you gently touch his arm that he looks over at you, eyes filled with insecurity and conflicted thoughts.

"i didn't mean anything by that conversation, levy. the topic came up in my book and my mind couldn't help but wander," you drift off a little bit as you gauge his reaction so far. Once you see he's still listening you continue, "i don't hold your past against you, and i shouldn't have brought it up like that. i'm so grateful to be yours."

you notice his eyes start to tear up, but don't say anything as he quickly wipes his eyes with the back of his hand.

"it's alright," he says, trying to hide his voice beginning to get choked up, "just please don't do that again, you scared me."

you allow yourself to let out a small laugh at this. "sorry, hon, it won't happen again."

❧ this whole interaction does open the door for more serious conversations, mainly about insecurities and where you see your relationship going in the future

❧ but all of this can be had on a later day, for now you just focus on reassuring and loving your partner <3

Mefy

❧ ok so your situation was actually a joke

❧ mefy decided that he wanted to try and scare you, pull one of his pranks and give you a spook, nothing to harmful

❧ he had it all set up to happen at night, the atmosphere was super creepy, and he made things shift a little and made it seem like there were shadows moving around you

❧ he got the idea for all this from a couple scary movies you told him about

❧ and sure enough, you got pretty scared

❧ you tried to calm yourself down, brush it off as just your imagination, you even called out to him a couple times either to see if it was him or if he was available to help you, the latter made him feel a lil guilty ngl

❧ but he kept it going until he sneaks up behind you without a sound, grabs onto your shoulders and yells out

❧ this made you let out a little shriek and you dropped to the ground to get away from whatever scared you

❧ you look back up and see that it was your loving partner who scared the hell out of you, and he's currently laughing at your reaction <3

❧ after you get your heart back in your chest, you start to laugh along with him; you're used to his antics enough to no longer take them seriously

❧ but there was one thing about your reaction that was different, and he didn't like it at all

"geez, mefy," you say through a sigh of relief, smiling up at him, "you're lucky i don't break up with you for pulling that stuff."

mefy stopped laughing as soon as those words finished coming out of your mouth. you've never complained about the stunts he pulls on you, not even in the beginning. he knows you trust him not to do anything that'll harm you or make you actually upset, and he won't ever break that trust. but to hear you insinuate that you would break up with him over something like this? where did this come from?

you stare at mefy, confused as to why his demeanor completely changed. you've gotten better at reading him, but right now it seems all that progress has vanished. his eyes are completely blank and his expression is stoic; there's no way you're gonna be able to figure out what's on his mind unless you ask him.

"mefy?" you say in a quiet tone, not wanting to startle him.

he turns and walks away, not saying a word to you. your first thought is that this must be part of the prank, that it's not over yet and he just wants to freak you out some more. but his expression is still clear in your mind; his eyes didn't hold that usual spark of mischief. what had gone wrong?

by the time you snap out of your thoughts and decide to go after him, mefy seems to have vanished. you run in the direction he walked away, but you couldn't find a trace of him anywhere. he wasn't in any of the rooms down that hall, and he didn't somehow end up in his bedroom in the opposite direction from which he walked. mefy used to disappear like this a lot but hadn't done so since the two of you got close and became a couple, so what caused him to revert back to this behavior?

the only other place left to look was outside. it was late at night by now, cold and you weren't dressed appropriately to go outside, especially if you had to go into the woods, but you didn't care in this moment. mefy was gone and troubled about something, and you wanted nothing more than to be by his side.

you found a lantern and immediately ran outside to look for him, not caring that you were still wearing your slippers and robe. you checked around the courtyard and even the garden, but there was no sign of him.

"dammit, mefy," you mutter to yourself, "of course you'd go out there."

you walk over to the gates, noting how one of the doors is slightly ajar, and you cross over into the woods. you've gotten good at avoiding the creatures that lie within the wooded area, but you've always had someone with you. you're on your own now, and all you can do is hope mefy is close enough to rescue you if something happens.

you follow the familiar path and in record time reach the clearing the two of you so often visit. lo and behold, mefy is standing dead center, looking up at the sky as if it'll tell him the meaning of life.

you take a few steps forward before calling out to him, wanting to close the distance a bit in case he takes off again.

"there you are, i was looking everywhere for you," you say to him as you get closer. you take note of his thin clothes and your concern grows even more. "aren't you cold? why did you come all the way out here this late at night?"

he turns to you and almost looks startled for a second before his expression returns to the dead one he gave you earlier. he still hasn't said anything, he just stares at you as if he's trying to look into your head.

"mefy, come on, i followed you all the way out here," you start, beginning to lose your patience, "the least you can do is tell me why you decided to run here in the dead of night."

he stares for a few more seconds before finally speaking, "you want to break up with me."

"huh?" you exclaim, completely shocked at his blunt statement, "no i don't, where the heck did you get that one from?"

"you said it yourself earlier," he states plainly, his tone increasing in bitterness as he continues, "you told me i'm lucky that you haven't ended things yet. why don't you just get it over with if you really feel that way."

everything finally clicks in your head as you recall what you said to him. "oh, mefy," you reach out timidly to grab onto his hand, freezing when he takes a step back instead, "i didn't mean that. i don't want to break up with you; i don't even know why that was my response. i shouldn't have even joked about it."

you gauge his reaction, waiting to see if he'll accept this before continuing. his judgemental gaze is piercing through you stronger than ever.

"i know how you can feel... not special at times. and i know how you hate it when i bring that up," you hurriedly say, noting his glare at your first statement, "but you are so, so special to me. you're important, my whole world! i wouldn't give you up for anything, and i wouldn't even dream about breaking up with you."

his body language softens at your proclamation, allowing you to get closer to him and to finally grab his hand.

"i'm sorry, my love. i won't let anything like this happen again," you rub your thumb on the back of his hand, "will you forgive me?"

he scans your face one last time, sighing at your hopeful expression, "fine, i forgive you. just don't let me hear you say something like that again. i have my ways of knowing if you do."

his usual mischievous look returns and a devilish smirk grows on his face as he says that last bit, but all you can think about is that everything is okay between you two again, and the relief is enough to make your body slouch over.

"great, now can we go home? it's so cold out here, and you made me go through that forest all by myself! do you know how dangerous that is?" you chastise mindlessly, happy to have things back to how they were.

mefy chuckles at your antics, "i didn't make you do anything. following me out here was all your decision, darling."

❧ mefy leads you back through the forest safely, although he did choose to spook you a couple times just to see your reaction and get a laugh

❧ the two of you return to the bedroom and get ready for bed as you usually do

❧ as you get ready to finally drift off, you hear mefy say one last thing, "do not tell lucia about what happened tonight"

[ging-pegger]

Ok but this scenario that where you trained with kite under Ging as well and he falls in love with you, but is too nervous to say anything to you so instead writes you a letter confessing and you only receive it once you find out he dies. I might write for this as well but It's been on my mind all day😩‼‼

IM NOT GOOD WITH ANGST BUT I'LL TRY

cw: angst, death, spoilers for the chimera arc 😰🚶‍♀️

ALSO IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG 🥴

You clenched the strap of the leather sachel that lay next to you as you leaned against a tree. The sun was unforgiving and cruel.

Just like the chimera ants.

There was no calm in this moment. Your mind, was racing. You envied gon who was knocked unconcious, he didnt have to think about the what ifs.

The scene of kite, loosing his arm. The anger, that took over you the more you thought about it. That thing. That monster... it had came out of nowhere. And there was nothing any of you could do.

You and kite had been friends for years. You had both trained under ging, and stuck together over since. You were always together. Whenever one was spotted, the other not far behind. And if you were being honest, you enjoyed the partnership. Every moment the two of you had spent together was unpredictable and exciting, until this very moment. A threat neither of you stood a chance compared to. Had most likely taken his life. You couldn't bear it.

You had left because you were told to. Because you had promised each other come a time when you could not save yourself, that it then became a matter of every man for themself.

You looked at the sachel. It was kite's.

It was almost as if something were drawing you to check the contents inside. For some reason, you were compelled to snoop through his things.

You had never, in the entire time you had known him, invaded his privacy nor had you overstepped your boundaries. It wasn't something you were eager to do, but, you just couldn't help yourself.

You glanced over at killua and gon. Gon was still out cold, and killua was resting his eyes in the shade of the tree. You felt comfortable knowing they weren't paying attention.

You took a deep breath, your hand shaking as you open the sachel. It was a mess. Random items, unorganized and left just as he had it the last time he opened it.

As you sifted through the items, something caught your eye. A neatly folded piece of parchment. You pick it up between your index and middle finger, carefully unfolding it.

To your suprise, it was addressed to you.

Greetings, my dearest, __,

Over these many, many, years we've shared a beautiful friendship journey together. From the moment we first met, training under Ging, i knew you were special. We've remained strong together through difficult times and even shared some great laughs. Today, I can't shake my feeling of confidence that our friendship has developed into something much more. I am well aware that it is your company that I seek at all times in my life. I wish to take you on all of my adventures of life, even the ones that are mediocre at best compared to the ones we've shared together throughout these years. I want to create new adventures with you. I'm not hesitant to say it, i am in love with you __.

I'm in awe of the person you are. The vulnerability, and truths youve revealed to me those nights we were alone together. In the moments weve shared under the night sky, staying up and talking. Sharing our hopes and dreams. Yearning for adventure and new expiriences, even talking about sharing them together. I've realized that you're the one I want to love and care about for the rest of my life. I've no doubt that you've picked up on the changes in my mannerisms , so I wanted to tell you what's been on my mind. Whatever your response, I assure you that I will not make anything different or weird between us. I value our friendship over anything, and if you don't desire to move forward, I completely understand. But I ask that you consider these thoughts I've presented to you.

Yours devotedly and lovingly, Kite.

As you were reading this letter, something clicked inside of you. Tears streaming down your face, you stared at the letter in disbelief. You were in love with kite.

"We have to go back-" you blurted out, your emotions taking over you. "We can't leave him there to die!" You stood up, grabbing the sachel, and slinging it over your shoulder

"What the hell did you read!?" Killua called after you. "You heard kite! He said to leave. He made us promise to leave him if he said to!"

"I cant. I can't let him die." You wiped the tears from your face, staining it with the dirt that was on your hands. "Kite is my best friend... you two can stay here, but I'm returning."

Killua watched as you headed back towards the entrance of the NGL. "You idiot!! You're walking into a death trap!" Killua called after you.

His words of warning only acted as encouragement. Reminding you of the danger he was in.

You looked over your shoulder, waving at killua before stepping inside.

[letterstothemidnightsociety]

Alright, so if you've been following along with me, Supernatural season 3 starts out on a trio of episodes that are Really Fun, slides into some episodes that are Pretty OK, then takes a real nose dive into Bummersville. Hoo boy guys, I really hope that this season picks up. I mean, it won’t, but I can still dream. 2021 was maybe not the year to start watching this season. Fair warning.

The next three episodes for this season are just, like, real downers. First we get “Fresh Blood,” which, aside from the terrible title, starts out on a high note. Gordon (gross) somehow manages to catch up with Bela (HOW??) and threatens her if she doesn’t hand over the Winchesters. Bela, in all of her class and grace, won’t give them up because she has a high price point and Gordon is really lowballing her here. Just like, yes, ok, please stay forever, you’re amazing and I love you. And what a scene this is! You have two characters, one with a strict moral code (albeit one that allows for violence and winning at all costs) and the other with almost NO moral code, but an allegiance that can be bought with the best price and it’s such a fun back and forth until Gordon pulls out a gun. And then she pulls out her phone and just has Dean on speed dial and that’s maybe my fav part. Bela has run into the Winchesters twice and they maybe legit hate her but she’s very much like, oh yeah, my BFF’s the Winchesters, I love those idiots!

I love that we come back to this moment later in the episode when Bela, like, three days later, is like, Oh! I guess I should warn the Winchesters that some crazy guy is after them! She’s just so casual about it you kind of get the feeling that, even though technically Gordon was threatening her life, she doesn’t view him as A Threat. She gives the Winchesters a heads up just to be like oh yeah, you might want to watch out for this mild inconvenience, and she seems legit shocked when Dean freaks out. There’s this moment that plays across her face like, oh shit, did I...did I fuck up? And it adds a nice bit of depth to her character. She’s seems honestly worried, both for the lives of the Winchesters but also that Dean won’t like her anymore and that is just a charming bit of A C T I N G!

I am gonna miss her SO MUCH when she dies at the end of this season. WHY did we CANCEL HER???

But despite the fun beginning, this episode is about monsters and how people become monsters and how other people are probably the reason. Because our main baddie is a vampire who hunts to...well, listen if we look at the facts that he lays out in his monologue, it’s a little more tragic - he’s trying to replace the daughters that he lost hundreds of years ago, cool motive, still murder. In practice though, he goes around turning hot blonde coeds into vampires and then ?????? Who knows. I’d like to believe that this was a problem with the CW executives or maybe casting/directing and not with the writing, but it’s SPN and you really can’t be sure with anything. The fact is, this is a CW show from the early 2000’s and a lot of their extras are cast to type. And that’s maybe me exhibiting some girl-on-girl crime, but there are other episodes that did a much less blatantly gross job casting their extras/Very Special Guest Stars.

Anyway, the POINT of this guy is that he’s a monster because someone killed his daughter and he’s just been trying to fill that grief hole inside of him for centuries. This is not unlike Gordon, who ALSO has been trying to fill a grief hole that he’s had for decades, except he’s not killing people and resurrecting them as blood suckers, he’s just killing them. And then, when the Vamp decides to turn Gordon it’s a real sweet moment of comeuppance for like, a HOT second and then you’re like, awww dude, ya done f’ed up. That was a bad idea. You’ve made a HUGE mistake.

More importantly, our Vampire In Question finally runs into the Winchesters and get’s to say things like “I was desperate! You ever felt desperate? I've lost everyone I ever loved. I'm staring down eternity alone. Can you think of a worse hell?” and also “I just ... I didn't care anymore. Do you know what it's like when you just don't give a damn? It's like ... it's like being dead already.” and Dean’s v. much like, THIS IS TOO REAL ROY.

Sam may ALSO be feeling Too Real feelings because he is DONE dicking around with Gordon and honestly yes, I like this, this is good Sam development. It’s nice to know that Sam has a breaking point. And I admit I’m of two minds about this moment because 1) I love the idea of Dark!Sam this season and that maybe Sam’s decision to actually kill Gordon is just one step in that process but 2) I ALSO love the idea of Sam Lite finally having a breaking point and Gordon is IT. I don’t know which theory I like more in this scenario, but they are both good theories.

I think as much as this episode wants to draw parallels between the monsters and Dean (thank you artful editors), you can’t look at the “I’ve lost everyone I ever loved,” line and not think of Sam? Cuz he’s got one (1) person left in his life that hasn’t died horribly, so how desperate is he about to get through the end of this season? I’ve definitely been watching this season with eyes on all the ominous Dean foreshadowing, but the Sam foreshadowing is also there, just buried under the heavy weight of a thousand smulders and suicidal levels of denial.

And also, FUCK the tag on this episode! Guys, it is CUTE but it is also HORRIBLE. Dean starts teaching Sam how to fix the Impala and at first it’s all, “Oh! Adorable Brothers Being Brothers!” and I loved it but then I almost immediately hated it because you realize this is about making sure Sam can get along without him once he’s gone and Dean just accepts his own death with such casual ease that it’s just...INFURIATING!

This scene was rude and I HATE IT!

Cut to - “A Very Supernatural Christmas” Special!

Guys, I was so excited when I got to this episode. THIS is Classic Supernatural Shenanigans. Plus, you know a Holiday Special is the ultimate sign that this show has Made It, right? Or it could be a sign that they’re selling out, who knows, but I think we can say that at this point in the series, SPN is established enough to start having fun with their fans. That’s what this says to me. BUT THEN what we get is like...oh boy.

First - like, I’mma beat this horse to death, but what is WRONG with this FAMILY? John Winchester very quickly devolved into the sort of father that forgot about every single holiday and did not ever, even a little bit, make up for it. It’s not a surprise, but it kind of wrecked me seeing a flashback where Baby Dean is just so attached to a father who can’t be bothered to actually care for his children. I know he’s not in this episode because Jeffrey Dean Morgan was tied up in other projects, but the fact that John doesn’t show up at the end to button the flashbacks with a But then he DID show up for Christmas! just makes this plot line that more gutting. And despite Dean’s hero worship of their father, this is maybe the Christmas where Baby Sam stops believing in his own father. The only bright side to this is that it continues to enforce the fact that Bobby should have sued John for custody. Bobby should maybe STILL Sue for custody so that Dean at least would feel like someone wants him for once in his life, damnit.

And then we wrap this episode up with the Best Worst Christmas of all, because we see Sam start to...also?? accept that Dean is about to die? Cuz that’s what this episode is really about - Dean’s Last Christmas. And everything about that makes me ~ u p s e t ~.

So Sam decides to put his curmudgeonly grinchy attitude aside in order to make it a special day for Dean and ugh. UGH. UGHGHGHG. Season three is the worst guys, and I can’t believe I didn’t realize that until right this second now.

So let’s wrap this up with "Malleus Maleficarum", honestly an episode that is mostly forgettable until we get to, like, the last five minutes. Sure, witches and curses and selling your soul, woohoo whatever.

But then we get some real Ruby centric reveals and like, WHAT is happening?? First off, the scene where Ruby and Tammy have a moment is a real Moment. There is some baggage and tension here and it is heavy. And then Tammy drops the mic when she reveals that Ruby used to be human.

THEN, Ruby legit saves their asses by killing Tammy with a fancy magic knife. Ok, Dean does the actual killing, but Ruby brought the fancy magic knife. So between the hot and heavy tension with “Tammy” and her repeated attempts to keep the Winchesters alive, we’re left wondering what IS Ruby’s deal? I personally wonder how much of the show’s mythology the show actually has figured out at this point? Because interviews with Kripke definitely walk the line between “Oh we definitely have this whole thing worked out,” and “yeah, we’re sort of finding things as we go along,” which is maybe why it’s able to last as long as it does. More on that later.

Of course the big kicker is the final scene between Ruby and Dean. Dean is almost on board with Ruby at this point in the season, and much like his scene with the demon in “Sin City”, they share a kind of vulnerable moment together where Ruby admits that, yeah, she was human once and yeah, Hell will destroy you, body and soul, and yeah Dean’s worst fear will probably come true - he will become the thing he hunts, no ifs, ands or buts about it. And Dean knows that Ruby knows that Dean knows that there’s no way to save Dean from his fate, but they both agree that they can’t take Sam’s last ounce of hope away from him because, for both of them, Sam is their hope. Ruby and Dean both see the war happening around them and they know that with Dean gone, Sam’s maybe the last guy holding back the tide to save all humanity.

Which, honestly? Bull shit. Do you know how many hunters are out there? Neither do I, but this season seems to indicate that there are a LOT. We have barely scratched the surface on the hunter community and it’s a damn shame that they are all weirdo loners because there is a war going on. You know what works great in a war? An ARMY. Buncha mentally unstable, martyr-complex ijits who can’t put their differences aside for one damn MINUTE so that maybe, JUST maybe, the could actually defeat the evil they’ve spent their entire lives dedicated to fighting. And if Ruby and Dean wanted to help Sam, what they should probably do is get him plugged in to that community. I do believe that of all they backasswards, self-obsessed, painfully anti-social crazies out there, the Winchesters are THE WORST.

Listen tho, this was like, a solid scene between these two. Just a lot of work goin' into this and it paid off.

Anyway, back to the mythology for a hot second - This sort of loosey-goosey stumbling into your own world building is probably another one of those things that you’ll only really get in a show with this many episodes per season? It’s that room to play and experiment and just make stuff up as you go along. I think the slow drip method of releasing episodes ALSO helps in this scenario because you’re able to see what fans are reacting to in almost-real time. When viewers are binging episodes, I think you're less likely to see what specifically they’re reacting to and more wholistically they’re reacting to. And that’s not to say you won’t see those specific things that they like/love eventually, but by the time you get there, your season’s been produced in its entirety and you’ll have to bear that in mind for (hopefully) next season. But with SPN, they were writing and producing the show at the same time that some of the episodes were airing. That’s why they were able to make decisions on the fly, based on what fans responded to. And definitely by this point in the show, there was a sizeable and vocal fan base that made their feelings VERY well-known. We’re only in season three, but they’ve already had a number of con appearances and a pretty active online presence. That kind of feedback has got to be helpful, from a writing perspective, but it also allows for things like characters getting cut because nobody liked them for some dumb reason. BUT, if you’re fighting to stay on the air for 100 episodes or longer, responding to fan reactions is what’s gonna do it and that’s a fact.