#don't judge these too hard they're supposed to be a funny thing

[lemonynuggets]

yk what posting these here

@butterscotch-goat can't believe matpat made Dawn and Escapism theories  🤯  🤯 

[springseasonie]

I'm a Mouse, Duh! | LJN + NJM (M)

Roommate Jeno x fem reader x roommate Jaemin, Halloween party trope, pure filth

Summary: Nomin in police costumes and Y/N in a "mouse" costume (it's literally just lingerie). Will they fuck? Keep reading to find out! (the answer is yes) (the title is a mean girls reference if you didn't notice btw)

Warnings: sexual content, dom Jeno, dom Jaemin, oral (fem and male receiving), Eifel tower 😖, spiting, cum eating, ass eating, butt stuff (it's my first time writing this don't judge too hard), double penetration, slight crying kink

Word count: 8,3k

Song recs: needs by tinashe

A/N: the drought is over!!! I have posted. This is my kinktober thing bcs I've been too busy with life so I hope y'all like this even though it's a bit rushed. This can kinda be like a "the walls are thin" special episode if you will. Also tysm for 800 followers (even though I'm barely posting). Feedback is loved and appreciated 🤍🤍

"Can you please hurry up? The party started an hour ago," Jaemin yelled from the living room.

"Don't rush me. You want me to look nice right? Be patient," you yelled back, applying the red lipstick carefully. You checked your hair in the mirror one last time, fixing your lashes as you leaned into your vanity.

"I'm sure you look fine. Hurry, I want to get there before they run out of beer," Jeno yelled.

"Gosh, I'm coming," you said, grabbing your bag. You opened your room door, heels clicking as you walked out the both of them sitting on the couch. You stared at them, face contorting in confusion. "Cops? Really?"

They turned to you, staring at you for a little longer than they should've. Your outfit was definitely something beyond scandalous. Lace lingerie, fishnets, heels, and a headband. Jaemin swallowed hard, eyes scraping every inch of your body. The obscene 'costume' hugged your body like it was made for you. And your lips looked great in red. He always loved the color on you. Jeno didn't hide his emotions like Jaemin did though. He was always shameless. Letting you know how good you look even on days where you weren't very dressed up. Jeno had always been attracted to you. Both of them were, making being roommates with them very hard at times.

"That's your costume," Jaemin questioned, eyes scanning you once again stopping at your cleavage.

"Yes it is."

"And what are you supposed to be," Jeno continued.

"I'm a mouse," you said, pouting at the headband. "Duh."

Jeno chuckled at your answer, raking his hands through his hair as he stared at you. "If I were to guess, I'd probably say playboy model."

"Ha ha very funny," you mumbled. "Anyway, I'm ready. Are you both going to keep sitting there staring or do you wanna go?"

"Yeah, the party, right." Jaemin pulled out his phone, ordering Uber for the three of you. You all walk outside, standing in front of your apartment. Tonight, the biggest frat of your university was going to throw a Halloween party. They're known for having the best parties, so this one shouldn't be short of excitement. You were hoping and praying to get laid tonight after a 4 month dry spell. You needed action, no matter where you got it from.

Hopefully, your dream could come true. It shouldn't be that hard right? After all, it was Halloween.

-

You definitely were not gonna get laid tonight. Half of the frat is already piss drunk, the sports bros are hooking up or going home early, all the hot guys are with their girlfriends. It looked like luck was in fact not on your side. In moments like these you would nuzzle into one of your friends arms and complain but they were all off doing whatever for the night. Now it was just you and the red solo cup full of various alcoholic beverages mixed together. The drink was rancid, but it would have you loose in no time to help you get comfortable.

Funny thing about it was you'd probably never be comfortable. You definitely did not have the most outrageous outfit in the house, but the eyes that lingered on you made you feel like you did. This costume was completely out of your norm. Every other Halloween, Jeno and Jaemin would dress up as something funny, but this time you wanted to take a bit of a break. Now that break is costing you foot pain, forcing you to stand in the corner in 5 inch heels for an hour and a half.

You stopped your drink, trying your best to avoid the gaze of the men who migrated around the house. But there was one gaze you couldn't shake no matter how much you tried. Jaemin watched you from the other side, eyes scanning your body like they did hours prior. He was so attracted to you it made him crazy. This was probably the first time he felt like he needed you. There were times where he walked in on you accidentally, saw you in underwear, but nothing could compare to this.

You stood there, gorgeous as ever, in the sexiest clothes ever, tiny bits of skin peeking through the lace making his mind wild. And now that he had just the right amount of alcohol in his system, he could finally do something about it.

You didn't notice Jaemin walking towards you, so when you heard him speak, you jumped a bit.

"Y/N," he said, making you turn around.

"God, you scared me," you laughed. You watched him lean on the wall, one hand on his cup and the other in his pocket. His eyes hung low, lips curved into a smile as he stared at you.

"Ah, sorry. Didn't mean to." Jaemin sipped his drink, licking his lips as he continued to look at your cleavage. "I didn't tell you earlier but… you look great tonight."

The way his eyes went from your lips to your chest didn't go unnoticed. "You didn't have to tell me, you've been staring since we got here," you say. You thought that would probably throw him off his game but to your surprise, all he did was grin and laugh.

"So you noticed?"

"Of course I noticed. Everyone's been staring at me. Am I that naked," you question.

"Do you feel naked?"

"I do when you look at me like that," you laugh. Jaemin's eyes were always the thing that told you the most. He could've lied and said you look ridiculous but his expressions never lie. He didn't know, but you always felt vulnerable under his stare. Like he could do anything and everything. And you would definitely let him.

"If you wanna fuck me, just say so," you joke. You brought the cup to your lips, drinking the party battery acid. Your eyes were locked on his, the tension between you both becoming thicker and thicker by the second. For a minute, you forgot that you were in a room full of people because all you wanted to do was rip that costume off him and give him what he was begging for.

Jaemin watched you as you pulled the cup away from your lips, lipstick staining the plastic. A drop of the liquid remained on your lip, the sight making Jaemin swallow hard. All he could think about was that pretty lipstick being in places it shouldn't be. Jaemin reached up, tilting your chin to him softly as he took his thumb and wiped the drop.

Your stomach erupted in butterflies, heat spreading between your legs when he maintained eye contact. You didn't mean to, but you leaned into his touch, slightly gasping when he continued staring at you.

"Should I fuck you," he said out right.

Your heart beat sped up immediately, this sudden surge of confidence in him making you go crazy. That's when you noticed how close you both were. Jaemin's face was hovering right above yours, one more step and he would be kissing you. His lips looked so soft and inviting, so why not make it happen. You glanced at his lips then looked back at his eyes slowly getting sucked into his little game.

"Is this part of your whole police bit? Interrogating me like this,' you joke, trying to take some edge off the moment. "Are you going to arrest me if I don't answer?"

Jaemin didn't answer, just grinned. You always had a way of getting out of something and that something just so happened to be the sexual tension that's been brewing between the both of you for the longest. You couldn't deny that he looked good in the costume. And you always had a thing for men in uniform.

But instead of making a move, Jaemin simply backed away from you, eyeing you up and down. "I'm not doing this here," he mumbled, licking his lips.

"Do it," you said. "Do whatever you want." You swallowed hard, watching Jaemin watch you. You wanted him to just grab you and take you right here in the corner of the room. No one would notice anyway. Everyone was either high, drunk or in their own world.

Jaemin chuckled, licking his lips. "I'll see you later okay. Don't get too drunk." And with that he walked away, leaving you hot and needy.

-

Your body moved to the music, surrounded on all sides by people who also danced, talked and laughed. So far it's been a blast. Nothing crazy has happened except for some guy fighting another guy for scaring him too badly, two freshmans getting caught in a bedroom together, a girl projectile vomiting all over the living room. But other than that, it's been a smooth night.

You keep thinking about how you talked earlier with Jaemin. His sly look, the confidence in his eyes, the way he towered over you. God, he was so enticing.

You kept sipping your drink, the liquid falling into your stomach and heating your body at the same time when you felt someone come up behind you. They held your hips, body swaying with yours. "I thought you would never come back," you said, leaning into their body.

"I haven't seen you all night."

You looked behind you, only to see Jeno staring at you with his signature smile. "I thought you were Jaem," you said, turning around fully. You wrapped your arms around his neck as he continued to hold your waist, body dancing with yours to the music.

"Why are you always looking for him and not me," he whined playfully.

You laughed, fingers playing in his hair. You felt his hands tense and tighten on your hips, fingers slightly pressing into your sides. This is the closest you've probably ever been to him. Due to the nature of your outfit, it felt like his hands were on your skin, making your body heat up a little too fast. You tried to push the thoughts of his hands ripping off the outfit, forcing you down to your knees, swirling your cup of liquid behind his head. You took your arm from behind him, sipping it slowly.

"Gosh what made you think this costume was a good idea," he groaned, his cute grin making you giggle.

"Why didn't you and Jaem tell me you guys were gonna be cops? I could've been a cop too," you laugh.

"No one likes female cops."

"Not true. You haven't seen me as a female cop yet." The funny thing is that he did it last year. Except you bought a proper cop costume instead of a 'sexy' one. "Besides, I like this one. It was cheap."

"Clearly," he chuckled. His laugh was deep, radiating through your entire chest. That's when you noticed he wasn't even looking in your direction. Jeno was looking directly at your cleavage as your chest was pressed right against his. He slid his hands down your hips and behind, palms loosely cupping your ass. "What were you looking to achieve wearing this Y/N? Because whatever it was, it might be working."

You reached back, moving his hands back to your hips. "I'm trying to get laid, and I'm trying to do it with anyone that's not you."

Jeno raised a brow, giving you a dry laugh. "You're the only woman I know who wouldn't take the easy route."

"And what do you mean by that?"

"I mean," he leaned into your ear, lips brushing against the edge,"what kind of woman wouldn't wanna fuck two guys who clearly wanna fuck her and happens to live with?"

Jenos hands snakes back to your ass, gripping it hard. Your brows furrowed as you looked up at him, who remained as calm and collected as he did earlier. God it made you crazy. You were already wet from the interaction with Jaemin earlier, this one with Jeno just making you soaked.

"You're so rough, don't manhandle me," you whined, chest slightly pushing against his.

"Don't pretend you don't like it rough. 'Harder, faster'," he mocked. You've been a little less discreet than you would've liked in the past, leading to weeks and weeks of bullying by the two. "Your taste in men is horrible. If you have to keep telling them what to do, they're horrible."

"And if I fuck you and Jaem, what would that make me," you ask, tilting your head.

"Smart."

You laugh, taking another big sip from your cup. All Jeno could think about was how close you were to him. How close he is to ripping your lack of real clothes off. He just wanted you to admit that you've been thinking about it too, but he's fine if you didn't. He enjoyed the chase. He watched you place the cup on the coffee table that's next to you, fully immersing yourself in the conversation you were having with him. But Jeno wishes he could immerse himself the same as you. The way you look at him, the way you let your fingers graze his arms. You had no idea.

"Do you like the police costumes," Jeno asked you, content expression on his face.

You nod, moving your arms from around his neck and placing them on his shoulders. "Of course I do. You look hot," you complimented, grazing your fingers down his arms.

"Hot enough for you to fuck?"

You gave him a soft laugh, rolling your eyes. "Keep asking and it'll never happen."

"So you've considered."

You shook your head, avoiding the obvious answer but he knew you better than that. You thought about fucking him and Jaemin almost everyday. The thought of them bending you over, fist in your hair as they took you from behind plagued your once sane mind more times than you would like to admit. The feeling of their rough strong hands on your body, forcing you into any position possible. You couldn't help it. Living in such close quarters with them gave you the privileges of seeing things other women would kill to see. The Halloween costumes made it so much worse, the want for them to dominate you stronger than ever. Maybe you had a thing for power, but whatever it was was turning you into the most horny woman where you stood.

"Don't lie to me," he said quietly. Jeno gave you a smug smile as he leaned into your ear. "Instead of trying to fuck one of these losers, all you have to do is say the word and we'll be out of here."

A shiver ran down your spine feeling his breath on your ear. You needed him badly. You needed Jaemin badly, and you just knew you had to take the opportunity, but not without teasing him so much. Just before you spoke, you felt someone press against your back, whoever it was was not breathing into your neck.

"You guys are having fun without me?"

You gulped, Jaemin's deep whisper traveling right between your legs. Jeno moved his hands to your hips allowing Jaemin to place his own hands on your waist. His fingers played with the thin fabric, nails threatening to tip the thread with every pass. Jaemin pressed his semi hard cock in your ass while Jeno pressed his to your front, sending you into a spiral. You were forcefully sandwiched between your roommates, the air getting thick around you as people began to stare at the three of you.

"Guys people are starting to stare," you say, looking down to avoid eye contact with Jeno.

"And? They're just waiting for us to fuck you right in the middle of this floor. And I bet you're waiting for it too," Jaemin says in your ear, chuckling when you arched your ass on him. For a second it felt like no one was in the room. The music muffled in your ears, the faint feeling of jaemin's lips on your neck and Jeno's lips grazing against your lighting a fire in your chest.

"Stop teasing," you exhale.

"Do you want it as much as we want it," Jeno questioned, biting his lip as he stared at yours.

"Yes."

A wicked smile you couldn't see spread on Jaemin's face hearing your words. "This is gonna be a long night then."

-

The Uber ride consisted of nothing but kissing and touching. You were squeezed between the two men, their hands all over your body not giving a second to breathe. You find yourself kissing both of them at the same time, one or the other pulling you away when they feel they've been left out.

Jaemin's soft touch contrasted how strong his kisses were, his hand resting gently on the back of your neck as he kissed you. He wanted you to feel how much he wanted you, not just know. Jaemin didn't hide how horny he was for you due to the number of drinks he consumed at the party. He palmed himself, his cock straining against the pants of the costume.

Beside you, Jeno kissed neck, holding your waist tight he was pressed against you, sandwiching your body between the both of them. The scene was something straight out of a movie. The three of you are unable to keep your hands to yourselves as your driver tries his best to not watch in the front of the car.

You were in a complete daze, Jeno grabbing your chin gently, turning you to him. You moaned on his lips softly, turning your body to him. Jeno's hands went from your waist to your chest, gripping your breast generously. Jaemin kissed your neck down to your shoulder, his big strong hands making their way between your legs. You gasped softly feeling his thumbs rub your inner thighs dangerously close to your soaking heat.

"Fuck," you whispered, brows furrowing as you felt his thumb graze your clothed clit.

"It would only take me a second to rip this shit fabric off you," he whispered low enough so the driver couldn't hear. "Is that what you want?"

You nodded, gulping as Jeno's hands rubbed up your thighs. "Be patient, pretty. We're almost home," Jeno whispered, kissing the corner of your mouth. You wish you could calm down, but the way jeno's hands sooth you as Jaemin keeps rubbing his thumb dangerously close to your clit makes you feel insane.

You kissed Jeno, hand on his neck as he wanted into his mouth. Jaemin began stroking his thumb softly against your clit, his lips on the back of your neck. Jeno bit your lip softly, kissing you once more as you began to quietly moan. Your hips moved on their own, slightly beginning to grind on his thumb.

"You're such a cute whore, putting on a show for everyone," Jaemin whispered.

"Are you gonna punish me officer?"

Your lips curled into a smile hearing Jaemin's soft laughter. You thought he would be put off by the sentence but instead he whispered something else that made your thoughts run.

"The costume came with handcuffs. You wanna put them to use?"

You nodded, heart beating fast in your chest. Jeno took your chin between his fingers, kissing you softly, his tongue making its way into your mouth. Jeno wrapped his hand around your neck, squeezing it lightly making you moan softly into his mouth.

"U-uh, w-we arrived at your location," said the driver, who was silent the whole ride.

Jeno planted one more kiss on your lips softly, before turning to speak. "Thanks for the ride." The three of you got out of the car, Jeno stopping before walking to the entrance of your shared apartment.

"Mark is your name right?"

"Uh-huh," the driver said, nodding awkwardly.

"Thanks for the ride Mark, I'll give you a hefty tip."

The driver nodded and drove off, the deep red on his cheeks completely noticeable. Jeno walked back to you and Jaemin, who were already eating each other's faces in front of the door. "You two look like 2 drunk sorority girls," he laughed, pulling you away from the other male.

"Well, I'm trying to fuck like a drunk sorority girl so let's go inside," you said, closing your eyes as Jeno kissed your neck. The male chuckled and pulled you into the building followed by Jaemin. The elevator ride up was just as eventful as the car ride, hands and mouths all over you. The ding of the elevator snapped you out of whatever trance they had you in, but not them. They pulled you down the hall and to the door of your apartment, Jaemin's hand fumbling as he put the code into the door.

In the blink of an eye, the three of you were inside and the door was shut. Both of their hands were all over your body, not even giving you a chance to breathe. Jaemin grabbed your face, kissing you roughly. "Fuck I've been waiting for this all night," he mumbled.

"C-can we get to my bedroom at least," you said.

The both of them chuckled at your sudden flustered expression, following you to your room. Once again they didn't even give you time to breathe before they were all over your body. Jaemin pulled you to him, lips on yours as his hands gripped your waist. His hands moved to your tiny shorts, unbuttoning and unzipping the fabric. You kicked your heels off, height shifting but still keeping your lips on his. That's when you feel Jeno come up behind you, pressing himself on your body as he groped your breast from behind, kissing your neck softly.

Jaemin tugs your shorts down letting the fabric fall to the floor. You step out of the shorts, moaning softly when you feel Jeno's hand slip between your legs, cupping your clothed heat.

"Bet you've been thinking about this all night," he whispered in your ear.

You nodded, brows furrowing as Jaemin begins to kiss your neck. "Just fuck me already," you whined softly.

"You're desperate aren't you," Jaemin mumbled, chuckling as he undid the buttons of your body suit. The male pulled the fabric up your body, his fingertips grazing your bare skin lighting a fire in your belly. Jeno wasted no time getting his hand back between your legs, finding that you were wearing nothing but a thong with your tights.

"Jesus, you really were just trying to get fucked tonight weren't you." You closed your eyes, letting your head fall on Jaemin's shoulder taking in the feeling of Jeno rubbing your clothed clit. He smirked to himself watching you push onto his hand as he kept going. "What do you want right now, hm?"

"Anything," you said breathlessly. "Please.."

"Isn't that cute," Jaemin mumbled, chuckling softly. "But are you gonna be a good girl for the rest of the night?"

You groaned softly, rolling your eyes. "Please just fuck me," you whined.

"You didn't answer his question," Jeno chimed, fingers playing with your fishnets.

You wanted to say something else, but you realized they had the upper hand at the moment. You needed to have sex badly, and was so desperate to get something out of someone. And as much as it pained you to not pick a fight with them m, you obliged not just for your own sanity, but also because the thought of them telling you what to do was fucking hot.

"I'll be a good girl," you said reluctantly.

"Good," Jaemin smirked. "Get on your knees."

Both of their eyes never left you as you dropped to the ground slowly. Their bodies towered over you in the most degrading way and you loved it. You move your hands towards Jaemin's belt, undoing it all while staring up at him. His eyes were glued on you, along with Jeno's, who was undoing his belt and unzipping his pants. You tugged his pants down, allowing his hard on to spring free from the confines of the fabric.

"Shit," you whispered to yourself, staring at the size of him.

You look to your left to see Jeno was just a big, a gulp moving down your throat.

"What? You're scared," Jaemin mocked.

"Don't tell me you're a quitter Y/N," Jeno taunts, "we barely got started."

"Shut up," you grumbled. Your face grew hot, breath a little shallow as you wrapped your hand around the base of Jeno's cock, stroking it slowly as you turned to Jaemin's. Jaemin's heavily lidded eyes lingered on you, watching you as you licked the tip of his cock, staring at him with those big eyes he loved so much.

You wrapped your mouth around his head, sucking and bobbing your head slowly. The way he looked at you lit a fire in you, the fire traveling to your stomach and even lower, making you press your legs together. You lifted your mouth off him, wrapping your hand around his shaft as you turned to Jeno.

You licked up the base of his cock all the way to his tip, making the man scrunch his brows. He bit his lip, watching you close your eyes as you started to suck him off with a bit more vigor, hand moving on Jaemin at the same pace. Everything about this looked like it jumped straight out of a porno. You're still in half of your costume, Jaemin and Jeno dressed like cops with their pants to their ankles, both their cocks in your mouth.

"Good girl, keep going just like that," Jeno mumbled, hand stroking the back of your head.

The praise went right to your head and your cunt making you squeeze your legs tight. The way Jeno looked at you made you feel like he was about to eat you alive, and that's all you wanted. You pulled off of him, breathing heavily trying to catch your breath. Your hand stroked him fast as you turned to Jaemin, giving his neglected cock your attention.

You stuck your tongue out, tapping the tip on the wet muscle in the most teasing way possible. Jaemin watched you in awe as you kissed his tip softly, opening your mouth wide to take him. Jaemin licked his lips, enjoying watching you.

"Take all of it."

And you did, sinking lower and lower until all you could do was splutter around him, gagging as he hit the back of your throat. Jaemin took the back of your head, pushing you until your nose touched his skin. Eyes screwed shut, trying to be the best girl you possibly could below both of these men making you go crazy.

"Good girl," Jaemin cooed. "Take it like the slut you are."

Jaemin took his hand off your head, allowing you to rise from him. You coughed, heaving as you tried to get oxygen in your lungs but even that couldn't stop you from spitting on his cock and taking him in your mouth again. You bobbed your head, hand pumping Jeno at the same pace you had no idea how you looked but it couldn't have been anything short from a mess.

However, to the men standing above you, you looked like a wet dream. On your knees, hands on both of them, tears straining your face, drool falling from your pretty lips.

"Fuck, just look at her," Jeno grunted, thrusting into your hand slowly as you stroked him. You stopped bobbing your head, pulling his cock out your mouth and turned back to Jeno. They were both so close and you could tell. You could feel it in the way they were talking, breathing, thrusting in your mouth or hands. Jeno raked his hand through his hair, throwing his head back at the feeling of you deepthroating him, a loud groan leaving his lips.

"I'm so fucking close," Jeno moaned, the sound of his voice making you weak.

"C'mon baby, make us cum." Jaemin breathing heavily along with the male across from him, watching you with focused eyes as you removed Jeno from your mouth, not just stroking them in your hands quickly.

Looking up at them, your doe eyes shifted rapidly between them, wanting them to cum badly. "Please," you spoke with a breathy moan, voice raspy. "Cum on my fucking face."

Your voice sent them both over the edge, the pressure building up in both of them resulting in your cum landing all over your face. You stuck your tongue out, catching both of their seed swallowing and sticking it out again to show them.

"Good girl," Jaemin praised. "such a good girl. Stand up for me pretty."

You did as you were told, letting go of their cocks as you rose to your feet, knees sore from being on them too long. Jaemin pulled you to him, lips crashing on yours. Behind you, you felt Jeno's hand snake underneath you, popping the buttons of the body suit. You moaned softly, feeling his hands pull the fabric up your stomach. He traced his fingers on your ass, giving you neck slow wet kisses.

You pulled away from Jaemin, reaching back for Jeno as you felt his fingers graze your inner thighs once more.

"I let me taste you," he said, ensuing an enthusiastic nod from you. Jeno took you, sitting you on the edge of your bed followed by him sinking to his knees right in front of you. You thought about this happening more times than you'd like to admit. But now here he is, spreading your legs wide for him, eyes unable to look away from your soaked thong and slick thighs. You were a mess and don't even know.

"Fuck," Jaemin breathed. "You like being on your knees that much?" Jaemin sat next to you, stroking his semi soft cock as he watched Jeno tease you.

Jeno kissed your inner thighs, tongue grinding along your skin licking your arousal. His eyes never left yours. They pierced into yours as if they could read every thought you had at the moment. A shiver ran through your spine as you circled his tongue on your clothes clit, hand reaching up and pulling the thong against the sensitive bud.

"Perfect little pussy just for me," he mumbled to himself, pushing the fabric aside.

"God we should've done this a long time ago," Jaemin mumbled.

Jeno gave you clit one lick, making your body shudder, a sigh falling from your lips. He did it again, this time harder and longer. Jeno wrapped his arms around the underside of your legs, placing soft kisses on your cunt. Jaemin turned your head to him, locking lips with you as Jeno began to eat you out with vigorous tongue moving all over.

Jaemin kissed you deeper, tongue exploring your mouth as his hand kept pumping his cock. Jaemin pulled away, smirking to himself as he looked at your cum covered face. "So fucking pretty," he mumbled, kissing the corner of your mouth.

Your moans grew, panting heavily as Jeno sucked your clit, flicking his tongue on the bud. Looking down at him, you couldn't help but get even more turned on. His mouth was covered in your slick, tongue moving inside you like crazy. Your hips began to move on its own, grinding on his face. You always loved his nose, especially right now. His nose continued to stimulate the swollen bud as he licked at your entrance.

"Fuck Jeno, oh my God," you whimpered, pleasure amplified by Jaemin's lips on your neck.

"Is this pretty pussy gonna cum for me," he mumbled, flicking his tongue on your clit fast. Jeno removed his arm from around your leg, hand immediately making its way in-between your legs. In the blink of an eye, his fingers were inside you, fingering you hard and fast.

"Jeno, fuck just like that," you whimpered, body starting to shake from the intense pleasure. He never took his eyes off you, lips wrapping around your clit once again, sucking it hard.

"F-fuck, you're gonna make me cum." You ran your hand through his hair, gripping it tight as you pulled his face closer to your body. Just as you felt yourself about to cum, Jaemin took your chin, kissing you messily. You moaned loudly into the other male's mouth, sucking his tongue as you whined, feeling yourself cum around Jeno's fingers.

You sat there panting as Jaemin cupped your face, trying to catch your breath and whatever piece of mind was still there as Jeno moved his fingers from inside you.

"You did so good Y/N," Jeno praised, standing up between your legs. "Open your mouth for me."

You did, dropping your jaw on command. No man has ever been able to dominate you in the way that these two have, but you love it. You were fuzzy, completely fucked out. You just wanted to be a good girl for them. Jeno looked down at you, taking in the absolute mess that you were and reveled in it. The amount of times he's jerked off to this couldn't compare to being here at the moment. You were a tease and knew it. He couldn't wait to wreck you.

Jaemin watched Jeno grab your jaw and spit in your mouth, sticking his fingers coated in your cum down your throat right after. Almost like you've done this a thousand times more, you sucked his fingers, staring up at him with begging eyes.

"Fuck if I knew you were like this I would've fucked you a long time ago," Jaemin mumbled. You pulled off his fingers, nothing but a string of saliva connecting your bodies till it broke.

"I need both of you inside me," you said, face hot at the thought.

"At the same time," Jaemin questioned. Both of the men glanced at each other, silently communicating.

You nodded, gulping as you stared at them with desperate eyes. "Please.."

Jeno sighed, laughing softly to your begging. He began to unbutton his shirt, the sight of his fingers moving setting your body on fire. "God, I love it when you beg."

You turned your head, Jaemin already out of his shirt. He removed his shoes, kicking his pants and boxers off his ankles. His hands then tugged on your bodysuit taking the sheer fabric off of you as lifted your arms. Then went your bra, Jaemin sliding it off your shoulders kissing the back of your neck softly. He took his shirt, wiping the cum that covered your face off, making you sigh in relief.

"Face down ass up," Jaemin said, tone more assertive than before.

You did as you were told, arching your ass in the air watching them watch you. Their eyes burned holes in your skin, smiles taunting you as you let them feel up your body.

"Where's your lube," Jeno questioned, raising a brow.

"Third drawer."

But before Jeno even pulled it out, Jaemin had already decided he was ready. You sighed softly, feeling his soft lips on the plush of your ass, his hands kneading your body like a stress ball. Jaemin never realized how unintentionally rough he was, how strong he was and it annoyed you except for this time. Your already sensitive cunt grew even more aroused as he squeezed harder. Jaemin smacked your ass hard, making your body jump.

"Has anyone ever eaten your ass before," he asked, his voice sounding darling from behind you.

Your face goes hot, gulping as you shake your head "no."

"There's a first time for everything."

The sensation that went through your body when his tongue touched your asshole was unexpected. Maybe you were simply too horny to function, but it actually felt good. Jaemin licked your backend again, this time starting from your pussy. Unintentionally, you pushed against his face more earning a hard smack on your ass once again.

"Fuck," you whispered, brows scrunched together. His tongue swirled around the tight muscle, eliciting yet another whine from your lips. Jeno stroked his cock, watching the both of you, precum already dripping. Jaemin was as hard as a brick, precum leaking down his tip as buried his face in your body. "J-Jaemin, this feels so good."

"Yeah?" He chuckled darkly, staring at you like you were his prey. He felt your body tremble in his hands when you felt his spit slide down your ass without warning. Jaemin rubbed the pad of his thumb on your puckered hole as he reached over to grab the lube. With one hand he opened it, squeezing its contents on your body. "You sure you want this," he asked, lids heavy with desire.

"Y-yes."

Jaemin took his finger, rubbing the lube a bit more before you gasped softly, feeling his finger move past the tight muscle. The deeper and deeper he pushed his finger, the harder your hands gripped the cover of your bed. The feeling was new, completely foreign and it would definitely take time before you got used to it. Your eyes were screw shut, the discomfort of him thrusting his finger in and out of you making your back hunch and whine tiredly.

"I know it feels strange but you'll start feeling good, I promise," he said softly.

And he was right, because after some time, that fire in your belly started to come back making you pant softly against your pillow. Your body becomes more relaxed, your brain adjusting the prior discomfort to pleasure. But you wanted more, needed more.

"A-add another finger," you mumbled, making Jeno bite his lip as he watched you.

Jaemin smirked, doing as you said. You gave him the reaction he expected. He loved your pretty sounds so much they gave him goosebumps. You were right around his fingers, the pressure making his cock leak. He popped the cap of the lube open, adding more.

"You're doing so well baby. Does it feel good," he said, voice sultry and sweet.

"Mhm." You could barely form real sentences, your brain too fogged in pleasure. You found yourself arching into his fingers more and more as he fingered you slowly. Jaemin's other hand massages your ass, adding more to the pleasure swimming all over your body. The room was silent with sounds of heavy breathing and the sound of Jaemin's fingers slipping in and out of you. That was until he slipped another finger in you without warning, making you whine loudly.

"F-fuck, it's too much," you whined.

"If you can't take three fingers, you can't take my cock," he said smoothly. "Don't tell me you're quitting Y/N."

"N-no," you managed to get out.

"Good," he mumbled. "Do you think you can take Jeno and my fingers at the same time?"

You nodded, gulping hard at the image you created in your head. "Yeah," you answered breathlessly. You lifted your body weakly, letting out a tiny whine as Jaemin pulled out his fingers. Jeno climbed underneath you, his head plopping down on your pink pillow. His hands ran up and down your sides, trying to soothe your sensitive body.

"God you're so pretty," he mumbled, staring at you from below. You hadn't seen yourself since you got out of the car, but you could only assume he was lying. Your lipstick was probably smudged everywhere, mascara running along your cheeks. You were anything but pretty, but his words still made you blush. "I would put a condom on, but I have no idea where you keep those."

"I don't have any," you said blankly, just now realizing your lack of protection. "But… I don't mind. As long as it's okay with you guys."

Jeno didn't say a word, only giving you a look like he's been dreaming of this moment. He thought about it all the time, fucking you nice and raw. The thought of having your tight cunt around him was about to make him spiral. Jeno took his cock, rubbing the tip along your slit slowly.

He grinned, watching your brows knit at the feeling. "You want me to fill you up real bad don't you," he taunted, rubbing your clit softly.

"Yes, I want you to stretch me. Please," you whined, begging for him with a hot face. You let out a breathy moan, feeling his tip slowly enter you. Jeno let your hips do the rest of the work, groaning when you fully sat on his cock. "Jeno, you're so big," you moaned, mindlessly beginning to grind on him. Your hands curled on his chest, the stretch he was giving you overstimulating your senses but you couldn't help yourself.

Suddenly, you felt two strong hands grab your hips and still them. "You're so eager you can't even wait," Jaemin said with a small laugh. He kneeled behind you, forcefully pushing your body down against Jeno, making you arch your back. That's when Jeno wrapped his arms around you keeping you still as Jaemin added more lube. You shivered feeling the cold substance on your skin, hissing as his fingers filled your asshole once again.

Your body is on fire, Jeno filling your pussy while Jaemin plays with your ass. The vulnerability of the position, the way both of their eyes burned into you as you laid there weak and unable to have a single coherent thought only turned you on even more. Jeamin pumped his fingers in you while Jeno thrusted in you slowly, the discomfort beginning to melt away as time passed. His dick was painfully hard, wanting to do nothing but ravage your body.

"You think you're ready," he said, chuckling when seeing your fucked out expression.

"Y-yes, fuck me please."

Jaemin moved closer to you, pulling his fingers out at you smoothly. Picking up the lube, he added a generous amount. You bite your lip hard looking, Jeno unwrapping his arms from around you allows you to look over your shoulder. Jaemin pressed the head of his cock against your hole, his eyes droopy in lust. Jaemin pushed the head of his cock into you, the stretch making you screw your eyes shut, nails digging into Jeno's chest.

"I love first timers," Jaemin groaned. His brows furrowed deep, gripping your hips. Very slowly, he fills you, the tightness making the three of you moan. You were in a daze, body gone completely limp and weak. You never felt so full in your life and you loved every second of it. The only thing you could do was take deep breaths, as Jaemin bottomed out inside of you. Tears pricked the edges of your eyes as you let your face fall into the crook of Jeno's neck.

"You're doing so good baby," Jeno whispered in your ear, his hands traveling to your ass, squeezing your body hard.

The action made you clench, giving both men a chill up their spines. "Fuck," you whimpered softly. "So full..t-too much.."

"Shh baby you can do it," he moaned softly, hips starting to rock into yours slowly. "Take it Y/N. Be a good girl and take it."

With every rock of his hips, it caused your body to move also, adding a slight bounce on Jeno's cock. You couldn't even compute the feeling flowing through your body. All you could do was lay there weak as they filled every part of you, drooling and moaning uncontrollably. Jeno turned your head to him, kissing you lazily as he began to thrust in and out of you slowly along with Jaemin.

Your breathing quickened, hands moving from his chest to his shoulders. "Oh my God," you whimpered tearfully. Your body was completely overstimulated, overwhelmed with lust.

"Poor baby, she's crying," Jeno said, chuckling darkly.

"Wanted both of us at the same time, but can barely handle it." Jeamin spread your cheeks further watching both his and Jeno's dick move in and out of you. "So fucking pretty and tight for me. You've been waiting for this haven't you."

Absent-mindedly, you nod, the only thing in your brain is pleasing them.

"Good girl," Jaemin said in a slight whisper. "Every time you cum from now on, I want it to be from my cock in your ass. Understand?"

"Y-yes," you said in a small groan.

"Good girl." A hard smack landed on your ass check, the pain quickly turning into pleasure. Jeno was beginning to get impatient, the feeling of Jaemin practically rubbing right against him, the tight and snug fit of the both of you quickly about to make him cum.

"Faster," you whine. "B-both of you, please." Both men obliged your pleading, watching you throw your head back, eyes rolling back while you moaned in controllably. Your hips pushed against the both of them, desperate for them to be seeing inside you.

"Such a fucking cock slut," Jeno said through gritted teeth, his hands trailing down your arched back. "You like having two dicks in you don't you?"

"Y-yes," you said, gasping, feeling a pair of fingers on your neglected clit. Looking at your bodies, you see Jeno's fingers rubbing it fast. You were nowhere near cumming, but now you felt it. You felt the pit in your stomach grow. "I'm gonna cum," you moaned, tears threatening to escape again.

"Cum on my cock." Jeno's voice sent a shockwave through you, your orgasm coming to you almost violently, body shaking, nails digging into his shoulders as you held onto him. Your pussy clenched tight around him, making you clench just as tight around Jaemin, who was pressing his fingers into your sides. For the first time in a long time, you came so hard you saw starts and it felt real fucking good.

"Fuck, you take me so well," Jeno groaned. He lost all self control after feeling you cum around him, thrust started to get fast. Jaemin matched his speed, making your already weak body slump over on the man below you. Your face was buried in his neck once again, whimpers and whines escaping.

Jaemin pounded into you as Jeno went deeper, every single movement making you see stars, your brain going fuzzy with pleasure.

Jaemin watched you sit up as best as you could, looking back watching both of them stuffing you like a doll. He took one glance at your wet face, hands gripping hips hard when the sight made his mind reel. That's when he felt himself coming closer and closer to his orgasm. Everything stimulated him quickly, the way you felt to the way you looked on top of Jeno, he was going to cum quickly.

"Fuck I'm so close," he groaned. "You want me to cum in your ass?"

"Yes, yes cum in me," you moaned weakly.

With a few more thrust, you felt Jaemin cum, his loud breathy moans filling your ears. Jaemin kept thrusting, riding out the high until he couldn't take it anymore. Slowly he pulled out of you, breathing heavily as he stared at your gaping asshole, cum slowly leaking out.

In an instant, you wanted him back inside you, missing the feeling of being full, but Jeno didn't let you miss it for too long. The man took your hips in his rough hands, holding your body up as he fucked up into you.

"J-jeno, fuck, right there," you sobbed, throwing your head back. You mustered up enough energy to bounce along with his thrust, your orgasm finally approaching for the third time that night. You squeezed around him tight, making the man moan loudly."Cum in me," you whined, holding onto his shoulders. "Fill me up."

His hands slid from your hips to your ass, squeezing so hard it was going to leave a bruise. "You like this? You like being fucked like a whore?"

"Mhm," you nodded. Desperate to reach your climax you start bouncing on him as he pounds into you. Soon enough you begin to feel your stomach tighten, on the brink of cumming. "Fuck, I-im cumming."

You came hard, body shivering on top of the male underneath you. Soon Jeno came with a loud moan, the warm liquid making your brows furrow. The three of you were exhausted, bodies completely spent– especially yours. Jeno was still inside you when you plopped down on his body, heart beating and trying to catch your breath even though you had minimal movement.

"Hey you alright," Jaemin said, poking at your back.

You didn't respond, your brain still fried from the high you just got. You laid on Jeno silently, tuning everything out.

"I think we broke her," Jeno jokes. His hands caress your waist, taking in the breaths fanning his neck. Jeno thrusted into you, earning a breathy moan.

"Too sensitive," you managed to say.

Jeno chuckled softly, kissing your cheek tenderly. "You did a good job Y/N. God you're so pretty when you cum."

"She looks like she's about to pass out," Jaemin commented, gazing at your expression.

He was right you were exhausted, horny, and one hundred percent not ready for the pain you were going to have in the morning. You gave Jeno a small whine when he pulled out of you, laying you next to him on the bed. You felt him run his hand on your side, looking at him with begging eyes as he rubbed your waist.

"You can't look at me like that and not say what you want," he mumbled, licking his lips.

"Kiss me," you said quietly, slightly pouting.

Jeno gave you a small smile, kissing you softly like you asked. "Let's get you cleaned up okay?"

Jeno stood up followed by Jaemin. Jaemin tugged your limp body to the corner of the bed, putting his arms under you to lift you up. You wrapped your arms around his neck, hugging him close to your body.

"So fucking cute," he mumbled. "Wanna watch a movie later?"

You shook your head, eyes getting heavy as he carried you to the bathroom. "I just wanna take a bath and sleep."

"Okay we can work with that," Jeno agreed.

You laughed to yourself in your drowsy state, biting your lip softly. "This has officially been the best Halloween ever."

[ninyard]

i am a BIG supporter of create what you want for your own joy, so absolutely do what you would like to do for the trial!! no one should be pressuring you to do it a specific way unless that’s how you Want to do it.

but if you were asking about what we’d like… personally i would love to see the whole trial as much as possible (i really don’t want you to overwhelm yourself) especially for higgin’s and nicky’s parts!! i like when we see more than just Big Main Parts, especially bc you flesh it out so well <3 sometimes it’s even more hard hitting when it’s Not from the people we expect, you know?

also, thank you for making the socmed aus!! they make me giggle and kick my feet every time, and also wail in agony and clutch at my chest… you have the range <3

GOD i wrote a whole long ass response to this and i didn't realise until too late that my phone was going to die </3 and it died </3

But it was something along the lines of I'm really glad that the general consensus seems to be to do all five days of the trial, or however many days it ends up being, from start to finish. For me personally it'd feel unfinished if I skipped parts just to get to the ~interesting~ parts, and I think if I'm going to make something like this then I want to show it all.

It's not this deep, but I guess it's like... It's fucked up. People are making memes about a murder trial involving rape and other things that are just not funny at all. And skipping parts just to get to "GOD NEIL IS SO CHAOTIC ON THE STAND" or whatever feels,,, insensitive? Unjust?? I don't know

but people are also doing that shit in real life. About real people, real trials, with real victims and real perpetrators. Sensationalising trials just because it's a celebrity on the stand, or it's an "interesting" murder trial or whatever. People are making memes and jokes about them. And people are making their own minds up about the verdict because of it. I want to show people who think Aaron's guilty because of something the cop who arrested him said. I want to show people who think Andrew is an unreliable witness because of something Higgins says, somebody who thinks Aaron isn't guilty because a forensics team mentioned something about the crime scene that they don't think sounds right. I want to make this from the outsider view on the publics reaction to a trial, and specifically people who almost idolise Aaron, or Kevin, or Neil, or Andrew. People who don't see them as human, but as celebrities, as people who are supposed to be perfect. People who see a trial like this and think, "it's okay for me to make jokes about this, or to post about this, because they're just famous people. They're not like real people to me."

People are at home becoming twitter lawyers and making up their minds based on what they read or see online, and it almost separates the reality of the situation from the "characters" that people create out of defendants and victims. You see people hopping on bandwagons or hate trains or whatever when it comes to these kind of public trials. People making clips of something "funny" a lawyer or witness said for the sake of content. People making temporary celebrities out of the judge and jury and legal representation. For what? For likes?

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I want to show the different sides of how people actually react to trials like this without becoming insensitive to the fact that trials like this,,, do actually happen. But by making a fan tweet a joke about murder, I'm making that, I'm thinking of the words that go into the tweet. So it's tough. And again I know it's not that deep, but that's kind of... most of the reason why I've been putting it off? Because it's hard. It's hard not to feel like it sensationalises those kinds of things. It's hard not to feel like "God, am I just making fun of this situation here?" while also being reminded that yeah, maybe, but people actually react like that.

So is it worth the tumblr post to make memes and tweets out of something that happens irl, and affects real people? Is it insensitive, or is it just fandom stuff that isn't perceived in an insensitive way at all, because it is just that, a fandom post?

[annoyingpoliceglitter]

I already know some details but would you mind sharing more about Aloy and Hertz? :)

Hey, what about the rest of the family?

I'm not sure if she'll be in the same AU as the others... But besides Gyro, Aloy and Hertz were supposed to have 2 other children! This little girl has a very creative, loud-mouthed personality. I think Aloy had a hard time with a troublemaker like that hahaha, and yes, I made her a hairdresser :') I thought it quite funny that there is such a zest among a family of engineers, scientists, and office workers. Sure, she feels anxious about it, but it's really what brings her happiness. Yep, Aloy made mistakes by putting too much pressure on her daughter over her choice of profession when she was younger. They definitely had conflicts, they're not perfect yk. But you can't judge your daughter for her creativity when you are just like that yourself, right? Mother understands that. It can be hard to get used to new things tho! But you can be sure she and daddy have a lot in common. Especially in humor :)

I think when she meets her brother the first thing she says is "NO, hell no! I don't do it for free!" …but she still gives Gyro a free haircut.

What about the oldest child? A copy of the father's looks and peacefulness…Maybe a little old-fashioned? More about him later, but he adores his family, be sure of that <3 He hears "damn, man, you look so much like your father!" more often than his name.

[katsumatsu4]

Smoke and mirrors

Also on Ao3

[And then, the faintest thought. He looks like me.

-

In the aftermatch of Niji and Yonji's capture Reiju reevaluates her relationship with her brothers. Takes place during Germa cover story]

Inspired by @sangerie theories/analyses about ichiji and all the sus things he does during wci, they're awesome :*

(hope this is better present than handsome judge pictures xd)

Stone wall wasn't the most comfortable place to sit, but moving away meant getting her eyes off the horizon. So Reiju stayed.

It’s funny how little it takes to lose sight of another person in the heat of battle. She could swear Yonji was just behind her, covering their retreat with his long-reach attacks. When clouds of smoke billowing from one of the ruined buildings surrounded them, she didn’t look back to see if he was still there. When she saw Ichiji on the other ship, she didn’t check if Niji managed to get on board.

If she was to be honest with herself, she wasn’t thinking about her other brothers in any way, too occupied worrying about whether Sanji and his crew escaped safely or not.

It was only when the fleet reunited that Reiju realized Ichiji assumed their younger brothers went with her. Father was furious, but it was hard to tell if his anger was directed more at two children who returned or the ones that didn’t.

It wasn’t important now. Now, Reiju was sitting in a crenel, cold stone sapping away her body heat. Ichiji on top of a crumbling merlon a few steps away. Father somewhere in the back, out of her field of vision. Silence weighted down on them but no one said a world ever since their lookout started, as if talking would force them to admit-

"They are not coming back."

Trust Ichiji to disregard any emotional tension. Reiju closed her eyes and leaned back, quietly grateful someone else voiced the thoughts plaguing her mind.

"All ships returned or were reported as destroyed," Ichiji continued. "Even if they were not captured, there is very little chance they can come back on their own."

Father grunted something under his breath. He barked at the two soldiers nearby to stand watch before addressing his children.

"Don't tell anyone Niji and Yonji are not back yet, we will deal with that later. Clean yourself before coming to the dining hall, it's unbecoming of royalty to look this disheveled. Don't bring even more shame to our name."

Reiju half-opened her eyes to watch him leave. The nerve of this man. Nothing we could do would give Germa more shame than it already proudly displays.

She threw the sea one last look and get up herself. She was about to reach the stairs when sudden voice stopped her in her tracks.

"Reiju?"

She looked over her shoulder at Ichiji, still sitting on the wall, his back turned away from her. "Yes?"

"Do you think they are dead?" come a monotone question. Reiju's mood soured even more. He could as well be talking about disappointing weather.

"I don't think so. They-" are probably being experimented on. Big Mom wants to know how to make something like us too much to kill them. That was what she intended to say. But then she looked at Ichiji again, his silhouette cutting out a dark shape against an orange sky. Lone shadow, soon to disappear when the sun finally sets down. And she hesitated. "They are strong."

Reiju waited for any indication he even heard her, but silence was the only response she got.

*

The situation at the table seemed almost surreal. They were being served at usual hour, in their usual places, with dishes planned for tonight on their plates. None of it masked the smell of smoke in the air or that the meal was clearly not as extravagant as it was supposed to be, even though cooks surely did what they could with inadequate supplies.

Behind her chair father, high above them, was unenthusiastically chewing on his food. Ichiji looked almost unbothered but she could see his head shifting every few minutes, eyes constantly drawn towards empty seats. Almost like a black hole, sucking in any attempts to create normal meal atmosphere.

She was getting tired of pretending.

"Father. What are we going to do about Niji and Yonji?"

The sudden quiet fell on them like a thick, heavy curtain.

"Father?"

"Nothing. At least for now."

Reiju gripped her utensils harder, slightly bending the spoon.

"May I ask why?"

"We just came back, the Charlotte family would expect us. We would gain nothing by charging in and we don't have enough soldiers to send them away from the kingdom. It's best to wait until their guard is down, then I will send the retrieval party."

Of course, what did she expect.

"If our numbers are an issue, maybe Ichiji and I could be of use? Smaller but stronger team could infiltrate and find our brothers with little problem. The two of us have enough manpower to save them and avoid any confrontation with pirates altogether."

"You clearly do not see the full picture, Reiju," Ichiji said in father's place. "We can not leave now either. We will be needed here to fill in for Niji and Yonji's responsibilities."

Father nodded at that, apparently intending to say the same thing.

Reiju ignored how tight her chest felt hearing this. She was almost surprised he spoke up at all instead of waiting and observing like usual. Still, she turned towards father. Ichiji wasn't the one she needed to convince.

"Wouldn't it be better for our image if we rescued them quickly? It would send a message, that anyone who plays havoc with us will get swift comeuppance."

Father, as impenetrable to criticism as always, disregarded her comment with a wave.

"We are not ready, I'm not going to waste resources on this. Besides, it could do us more good if enemy sees how invulnerable to pain and fear they are even when solely on their mercy."

Like you were during the wedding? Reijuthought, but kept to herself.

Logically, it made sense. Those were the words of a king and a scientist, clearly knowing the extent of damage his soldiers, his creations, could take before they would need to be scrapped. The bile come higher up her throat.

"I-" she started.

"It is a good intimidation tactic," Ichiji interrupted her. "If they are truly after our research then they will try to keep Yonji and Niji alive long enough to gain as much as possible from the experience. It should give us enough time to rebuild and regroup. There is no need to rush."

"Exactly," father said. "Ichiji, I trust you to take care of setting the course and dealing with any complications for today. Make sure to quell whispers among the staff, I don't need mass panic on my hands right now. I'm retiring for the evening; that was a long day."

Ichiji gave him a curt nod.

"As you wish, father."

He stood up and turned to her.

"After I relay the orders, I am going to call it a day too. I advise you do the same. Get some rest."

Soon both him and father left the room, leaving Reiju alone.

She looked down at her clenched fists, frustrated scream climbing up. But like always, she swallowed it down before it could reach her mouth.

Maybe I'll feel better after an hour-long shower. Or two.

*

Hot water didn't bring Reiju a peace of mind she was looking for. She emerged from the bathroom with a head only slightly less heavy than before.

Out of habit, Reiju reached for the curtains to close them shut and block the lights from Niji's rooms. He was always the last one to fall asleep and his castle had annoying habit of flanking hers.

She stopped halfway.

It wasn't that she missed them, exactly. How could you miss someone whose main enjoyment in life were violence and cruelty? How could you miss someone who only knew how to laugh at people's pain?

("They are getting so huge mom! Does that mean I won't be their big sister anymore?" Reiju said, Niji still refusing to let go of her finger, mumbling something in his sleep.

Mother smiled and caressed her head.

"Of course not sweetheart. You will always be their big sister, even if they grow taller."

"Taller than me?" Reiju asked.

"Taller than me!" mother laughed.

"Taller than dad?"

"Taller than all the doors!"

"Taller than the roof!" Reiju played along.

"They will be so big we will have to build a castle for each!

"And I'll still be the biggest sister!" she said with pride, her chest puffed.

"The biggest and the best sister in the entire world!" Mother touched their foreheads together. "Oh darling, they'll be so lucky to have you.")

One hand clutched on the fabric, Reiju felt the bitter laugh building up. Sometimes she wanted to curse mother, for placing this burden on her. For giving all her hopes and desperation to her eldest child, not thinking how much pain it's going to bring her.

But you can't curse the dead, can you? Not truly. Because every word she threw mother's way just seemed to fall back on Reiju anyway.

You failed them. They were yours to protect but the only thing you could think to do for them was dying with them. And you failed to do even that.

I tried! I tried to convince father! I tried to save them! If only Ichiji helped me-

How hypocritical. You were perfectly fine with letting them die earlier. You didn't even try to help, to warn them. How is that any different? Because you can't join them?

And that was it, wasn't it.

The tight feeling in her chest, threatening to choke her. Guilt.

Because she didn't die. Because they won't either, at least for now. No, instead they will be cut open and spread on the table like frogs, kept just alive enough for Big Mom and her children to learn how they work.

And then they'll die.

And she still won't.

And what then? She could vividly imagine father's disappointed face, looking down at what remained of his two perfect soldiers. Maybe he sighs and tells the staff to clean the mess. Maybe he scolds Ichiji for failing his mission. Maybe he even sheds a few tears at seeing his dream destroyed like that. Or maybe some spark appears in his eyes, he points at the blood and gore on the floor, says Take what's still usable and shuts himself in the labs. Maybe months later she sees next batch of soldiers with a familial jawline or flashing a self-assuring smirk that will make her heart clench.

Maybe Ichiji would care. Maybe he wouldn't. It's not like it changed anything.

Her reflection in the glass had red, puffed eyes and wet streak on its cheek.

How proud mother would be of you right now. Crying not because your brothers will die, but because you're left behind to deal with it.

Reiju reached for the handle and opened the window, letting cold night wind dry her tears and blow the thoughts away.

She looked down at the dark weaves below and suddenly felt unbearably tired.

Her hands, propelled at the windowsill, etched closer to the edge. Her body tilted over the threshold, mesmerized by the dance happening before her. Howling air and roaring sea filled her ears, two elements fighting for her attention. She closed her eyes and imagined how unnoticeable a single splash would be.

It could be over so easy...

(Blond hair kind smile gentle hands smelling like antiseptic and cigarettes I love you I love you I love you-)

I should go to sleep.

*

The moon disappeared behind the castle tower.

Reiju was staring at the darkness behind the window when the footsteps came. Slowly, not to appear startled, she turned her head.

Ichiji was standing in the doorway. Reiju wrinkled her nose. Didn’t even knock, of course.

“Good, you are not asleep. Get ready, we are leaving soon. Be in the strategy room in full gear, fifteen minutes should suffice. We have a job to do.” And before she could respond, he turned around and closed the door behind him.

Reiju rolled her eyes but started preparing. What did father came up with now? New mission so short after the humiliation at the hand of Big Mom Pirates? At this hour no less. The old fool probably wanted to cast an illusion that they weren’t affected by their loses. Or tried to catch any clients before their attempted alliance with pirates puts them on blacklists of most kingdoms associated with World Government.

Well, too little too late; judging by how excitingly Morgan had been taking photos of father's crying face, the news were bound to spread soon. This will only make them seem more desperate and all the more pathetic. Not that she had any energy or will to care about how others perceived this rotten mess of a kingdom.

Yonji probably would care, if only to please father-

She closed her eyes and banished him from her mind before the image of her youngest brother, talking excitedly about new experiment he was a witness of, could turn into a bloody figure pinning her under accusing stare.

Maybe at least this farce will get my thoughts off them.

Reiju run fingers through her hair and looked in the mirror. Standing in the cold did wonders for the puffed skin around her eyes, you could barely tell she was crying before. Her tears had evaporated, leaving behind only slightly sticky trails. She opened the faucet, quickly washed away remaining evidence and reached for the towel.

Dried up, she glanced at the mirror again. Vinsmoke Reiju, the first child of the royal family, the crown princess of the Germa kingdom, stared back at her. The oldest sister retreated behind the steel of her eyes, where she belonged.

She checked the clock. There was still a little time left.

The emptiness of corridors was more unnerving than she expected. Night was the time of rest but there should still be more soldiers around. She could hear the murmur of boilers from lower levels and the staff tiptoeing on carpets, off to finish their chores. Still, it was all too quiet.

Reiju shook her head and pushed the doors of the strategy room. She was met with another surprise, when the only figure greeting her was Ichiji again. Where was father?

Instead of explanation he just gave her a nod and gestured to follow.

She did. As she was supposed to. Reiju wished she could see Ichiji’s face but she settled on gluing her eyes to his back; something fishy was going on.

“What’s the mission?” she said, trying to sound as bored as possible. “You didn’t give me any details.”

“Our main objective is retrieving Yonji and Niji from the pirates.” -Reiju almost missed a step- “Our side objective is to destroy any of their assets if possible, as long as it does not interfere with the main goal.”

Reiju dismissed the terrified servant who almost bumped into them while rounding the corner and used resulting pause to collect herself.

“I see. It is an unusual hour for a takeoff though. Did father tell you this in person? I was under the impression he was against quick action. As were you,” she prodded.

Ichiji stayed silent for a few heartbeats.

“Father focuses his attention on more pressing issues. Our infrastructure, especially research areas, had taken a lot of damage. We also lost a lot of clones, which can not be replenished without functioning laboratories, so that obviously takes priority. However, I established that our defenses are in such state of disarray that some major changes need to be done imminently. Otherwise we will be left unprotected against even minor threats, which is unacceptable. As such, since I have been given certain freedom to handle other subjects, I deemed it necessary to move the rescue mission forward in time. We should be back by tomorrow noon if no complications arise.”

Reiju nodded, not missing that he didn’t actually confirmed what father knows.

Ichiji turned his head slightly, no doubt watching for her reaction now.

“I assumed, given your earlier arguments, that you would be onboard with this plan. But if you continue to dispute my decisions I will have to leave you behind.”

“I’m not disputing you, I agree that getting them back early will work in our favor. I was simply curious; father did make his stance quite clear after all. I was surprised he changed his mind this quickly.”

“Father trusts my judgment,” he said with flat tone.

“Does he now,” she responded.

And then, the faintest thought. He looks like me.

It was silly. Of course there were some similarities. Despite all the experiments and modifications the same blood was still running through their vines.

So why did it fell important?

Apparently satisfied with what he saw, Ichiji faced away from her again. Reiju shook her head, focusing back on the situation.

Ichiji was far from stupid, he had to know Judge wouldn’t approve of what he’s doing, even if her brother claimed he was just making important impromptu decision for the good of the kingdom. None of them could disregard father's orders, and going against his wishes like that…

But he didn’t forbade them from going, did he? It was Ichiji who said they can't leave right now; father only agreed with him. Kinda. Just vague enough to give them some wiggle room.

He said he’s not going to send anyone, not that nobody could go. Reiju looked back at their conversation. Did Ichiji plan for this? Is that why he didn’t push father harder, like she tried?

Had he already make his decision back then and was just waiting for the only person capable of stopping him to fall asleep?

But why? Why would he pretend before her? Why had he tried to make it seem like father’s decision?

Had he thought she wouldn’t agree to go with him otherwise?

What is your game? she thought. What do you have to gain?

It couldn't actually be about their defenses. True, they suffered heavy losses but it wasn't something two more people, even as dangerous as Yonji and Niji, could change.

She briefly entertained the thought of Ichiji trying to spare their brothers unnecessary pain. Reiju had to drag their exhausted bodies away from battlefield too many times to seriously consider it. There were no limits Ichiji would not go right past just to finish the mission.

There was no doubt in her mind that if Ichiji was the one captured he wouldn't expect to be rescued. If he had no regard for his own pain it was unlikely he would have any to spare for the rest of them.

Not valuing our lives seems to be the only thing we all have in common, she thought bitterly. Another great victory for the Kingdom of Germa 66.

Hadn't Sanji's botched wedding prove it? She sill remembered that moment with crystal clarity. Moves restricted by hard candy, guns to her head and the calm that came with the realization that this was it. All the evil of their bloodline contained in one place, destined to end right there and then.

The grating laughs of her brothers, unable to care uncaring about their oncoming deaths only validating her resolve to do nothing-

“Stop crying father, it’s pathetic,” half-remembered words rang in her ears. At the moment she took them as nothing more but another proof of Ichiji’s heartlessness, one even father was not except from. But wasn’t she thinking something of a sort too, back then? Reiju send Ichiji another curious look.

The mere idea of being anything like her brothers normally would make her sick. But if that meant Ichiji could be anything like her… If he… Could they have similar motivations right now?

The new spark of hope was carefully grabbed and stuffed deeper into her heart. Just deep enough to be protected when reality came back to extinguish it.

When she broke out of her thoughts they already reached the docking area. Few soldiers came rushing to their side.

“Prepare the ship. The smallest and fastest the better. And hurry, I do not have time for incompetence,” Ichiji said.

The closest soldier saluted.

“Yes my lord! How many units to prepare for departure?”

Her brother’s frown deepened. He looked back at her. In his usually inexpressive face she read the question, or warning, clear as day: Last call to stay if I can’t count on you.

She nodded.

“Princess Reiju and I will be going alone. Am I clear?” Ichiji snared.

The soldier saluted again and rushed to fulfill new orders.

Their ship was ready in the matter of minutes (for some reason it felt like hours).

After making sure the course was locked onto Toto Island, she found Ichiji leaning against the railing at the front of the ship, eyes fixed on the horizon.

Reiju felt the need to say something. She learned to crush urges like that a long time ago. Especially with Ichiji, who always seemed a little too aware of what she chose to share and what she didn’t.

And yet.

“We will get them back in time. They're going to be fine.”

“Of course. They're strong,” he responded, like it was the most obvious thing in the world. Like the option of anything else was so unprobable it wasn’t even worth mulling over.

Reiju felt the corners of her lips twitch upwards, as if pulled by invisible strings, before she schooled her expression out of habit.

And she dared hope the similar movement she glanced on Ichiji’s face was more than just the trick of light.

[ezra-editss]

"Dean doesn't reciprocate" MY ASS

I'm just kinda gonna write down my thoughts about this. I'm in season 7 now, I know what happens in the very last episode, but nothing else so I don't read any posts about the show here yet :) (just so yk and don't accidentally spoiler me) Oh and I do this mostly out of memory and some notes that I took, so this might be a little chaotic :,)

Okay, so the whole season 6 fight was crazy to me. The way Cas was watching while Dean kept on defending him. And he knew how much Dean trusted him. ("The worst part was Dean. He was trying so hard to be loyal, with every instinct telling him otherwise.") It hurt him, but the whole time he was, again, protecting Dean. And yes, he hurt Dean, but I think it was as bad for Cas to hurt Dean, as for Dean to be hurt.

Then, Dean apologizing for the others? They (thought they) were wrong and Dean had kept on trusting Cas, so why was it him who apologized? Because he knew it meant more to Cas when he did it? Idk.

Cas wasn't able to lie when he looked in Dean's eyes.. come on? Also, the fact Dean wasn't actually mad when he found out was really interesting. He was just extremely sad. Yes, his trust got broken and maybe he was just tired of it all, but it didn't seem like that to me, I felt like he usually got madder.

I love how they always share those sad looks when they go apart after the fights btw, such a best buddys thing to do.

It was really hard for both of them. We can see that Dean can't sleep that night and that Cas comes back to talk to him alone, because it only matters to him that Dean understands.

Oh and the "I'm doing this for you, Dean." I don't even need to explain his motives, because he reveals them himself.

Then the scene from my edit. (at the top) (it's kinda laggy, bc it's slow-motion, but anyways) They both have teary eyes a lot, but this is different. Dean turns aways because he knows he's gonna cry and Cas disappears before he really starts crying, but they are both fuckin crying about this. They're both just sad and want this to end. Even when Dean said he's gonna stop him and so on, it was way less threatening than usually. And Cas kept coming back when Dean was in danger.

But Dean still cared as well. In the first episode of season 7, when Cas asks for help, he pretends he doesn't care about him anymore for a bit, but you can clearly see that he still does. You at least can see it when he thinks Cas is dead. He's devastated.

It's kinda funny how Bobby's there but Cas very obviously only cares to make it up to Dean. Like he always says "they're my friends" but in reality he means Dean.

AND THEN.. Cas tries to protect everyone else again and sends them away but DEAN STAYS. I think he knew that there wouldn't be anything he could do, but it didn't matter.

Cas dies again. (give my man a break, please) Dean keeps the god damn coat? I think he might've done it, because he was hoping that Cas would come back again. Anyways, scene was devastating.

In the judge/court episode about Dean's guilt, I immediately hoped Dean didn't feel guilty about Cas too, but was pretty sure he did. My worries were confirmed in episode 5.

So yeah, I suppose that's the part where I am, I guess I have to wait 'till Cas comes back now :,)

I don't think anyone read all this, but I hope I didn't make any grammar mistakes, bc English isn't my first language, so I sometimes get stuff mixed up (I definitely made the tenses confusing). Anyways, rant end.

[eclipseofthemoonsmood]

Someone Edited My Drawing and Sent Me Hate. Hey Sclae and unotuno73. You're not funny. <3

So I got 2 notifications on Pinterest from this Sclae person, one of which they saved one of my created pins. Which was one of my older drawings. An OC named Hermone.

Then, in the second notification, they replied to one of my comments on someone else's post. It was of an OC that looked very similar to mine. So I made a satire joke about how there wasn't any originality left in the world bc nearly all OC's that aren't a creature are similar. ( Like i said, this was satire. But from the look of my replies someone didn't understand that. )

Anyway, this person followed me on Tumblr. Then, they sent me 2 Asks.

This unotuno73 person sent me another 2 Asks. This is 4 Asks in all.

Each one contained a different picture. These pictures were ( I'm assuming ) Hate memes. In each meme, the picture above, my OC- was featured in each of them. I don't know how old these kids are, but judging from the Skibidi Sigma memes that are contained in each photo, they must be pretty young. ( I have a feeling that both accounts might be the same person on some alt acct )

The first one here, is from unotuno73:

Not too bad. But then we see the next one, which is from Sclae.

Now this is plain disrespectful to me, my art, and my OC. I don't appreciate this.

This 3rd one is from unotuno73 again.

Endearing, I must say. But not very original. However, these editing skills are mediocre but have room for improvement.

The last one is from Sclae again.

I don't even know what to do with this. All I know is Lin Manuel Miranda did not deserve to be included in this Skibidi Brainrot.

I will say this. This is directed to @sclae and @unotuno73.

( Before I say this, I'm saying this as a person who takes these Asks as cyberbullying. I don't know if this was the intention or some twisted way of showing that you liked the art. If you meant this as appreciation and NOT bullying, please tell me!! )

Even if you guys don't realize it, this can hurt people. Genuinely, please don't disrespect artists and their hard work this way. These characters I create are my own creation, and I don't like them being used in this way. I am not young enough to understand these memes and what they're supposed to mean, but I am old enough to make the mature decision and try and nicely correct them publicly. These memes did not hurt my pride. But if you keep doing this, especially to artists that are younger, more sensitive- you can really hurt their feelings and possibly mental health. I don't know what you are going through irl, but I can say that no one deserves their art to be made fun of this way. If I receive any more things from you, I will block both of you.

This is aimed for EVERYONE WHO SEES THIS POST. PLEASE DO NOT ATTACK THESE USERS. THEY ARE MOST LIKELY MINORS AND DON'T REALIZE WHAT A DIGITAL FOOTPRINT IS. I just wanted to make this known publicly to them and everyone who has done or is thinking of doing something similar, that this is not cool or funny. Like, at all. Artists, whether they still be learning and studying their craft, or masters, do not deserve to be made fun of. No matter what age. Old or young.

[grokebaby]

Wavesssss hiiii E <3 How about 🐸 ⚠️ 🧁 and 🧠 for Delilah ? :3 and 🌲❗⚔️ ⚡ for Terjey my friend Terjeyyy

Waaveeeessss :3 Mang.... Hiiiiiiii heehehe

DELILAH

What's their sense of humor like?

Let's say dry. She can be kinda hard to make laugh beyond and amused hum or a little exhale. She's certainly one to like irony and funny coincidences as well as grim humor in most of it's forms - hard not to considering her position. But sometimes she falls for very silly very simple things. Sometimes. Don't tell her I said this. But make a funny noise at her suddenly in a serious situation sometimes. See what happens.

(The Warning⚠️question has been answered here!)

Birthday?

I doubt Delilah knows when hers or her sisters birthdays are supposed to be, seeing as how they were both stranded by themselves as grubs more or less. Nobody in their life to tell them when they were born, nor celebrate it for them. I'm sure Judge Stevious asked Delilah the same when taking the girls in for apprenticeship, but they don't have the answer to this. Deirdre probably shrugs it off, and Delilah was likely given an arbitrary birthday (and her age status has been mostly guessed and approximated via context clues), but she doesn't care to celebrate. Hart probably decided an arbitrary birthday for them both as well, and gives them gifts and does other niceties for them, but it tends to be forgetful.. Sometimes the girls get a random birthday here and there.

Stress response: fight, flight, freeze or fawn?

Uhhh which one is it when in response to stress she withdraws to herself and removes herself from the situation before having a meltdown alone?? Freeze? I feel like it could be either freeze or fight depending on the Immediacy and source of the stressor. She used to have a tendency to lash out in response to stress but in order to dial herself down for the sake of others she took into habit to just like. Remove herself. If it's like a split second situation she's more likely to react with fight or flight, although I wouldn't be surprised if she's made herself freeze in dire situations due to. Gestures at the previous stuff. Something along these lines.

TERJEY

How do they handle conflict?

It's a. Mixed bag. Terjey highly favors diplomacy as much as possible, however ges a bit too naive to always handle everything in a way that respects both participants ("Why can't we all just get along! Let's hug it out"), or addresses the core issue at hand properly. This is bc Terjey gerself was also born as a bandaid solution to what is a necropsied long bleeding gash that's gotten way out of hand. As they say. Ges learned a bit better to look at the situation at large critically but it's a stressful task and Terjey still tries to see to it that everyone mostly leaves the interaction somewhat satisfied and is a bit too prone to either swallowing up or making compromises too much, as ges reluctant to assign punishment to anyone unless they're very glaringly at fault or being very outwardly rude about the situation. It's rough.

Their highest priorities?

Sadly I'd have to say it's probably work. Terjey is unhealthily devoted due to all the pressure, and despite definitely goofing around alot more than most angels, ges also hanging off of duty on every thread and feels the urge to be helping anything and everything in every way even when hopping down to earth to let loose. Of course, even if Terjey strands them by themselves for long whiles due to work, Dove and Parfait do take a tad more priority over work stuff. It's just that ge wants them to be able to be okay even when ge can't make it to them so it's challenging, but if we. Let's say. Make a choice between the sweeties wellbeing and a work emergency. Actually let's not go there,

Pretty high up there in priority is to have fun and learn and try new stuff! Terjey is extremely zesty in experiencing little things in life :) ger not being as stuffy as other angels helps this along

Favorite location?

Definitely earth! Namely, anywhere ger friends are (at their place, mall, library), but just earth in general. Ge does enjoy spending some time in ger own Room in heaven but uses it mostly as a resting place (which is unfortunately rare) or a storage for trinkets (there's lots). Ge also finds gerself Just Fine spending time in Dove and Parfaits little enclosure bc it's specifically made very comfortable and safe (sensorily or otherwise) for the sweeties. And hey, the sweeties are there too! But as for earth, Bakeries, parks (especially indoor or sports parks!), malls.. Fun places! Ger friend Byrds apartment is a favorite, though... <3

(irrational or unusual) fears?

Not sure if ge does have any irrational or unusual fears? I think the ones Terjey has are pretty reasonable and understandable fears. In fact I'd rather say Terjey has an alarming lack of danger response when it comes to risky situations, at least when the risk concerns Terjey gerself and isn't directed towards someone else.

Does ocd intrusive thoughts count as irrational fears?

[sweaterkittensahoy]

Anyway, here's the spin the bottle CrozBrady on its own and NOT an unintentional paste of two ficlets.

[Althouh, the fact they were both CrozBrady is pretty funny]

Harry isn't sure how it happens, but it's very late, and he's just drinking directly from a pitcher of martinis at this point, and there's a big circle of them playing spin the bottle. 

He's leaning against Bubbles, who's drinking straight from a bottle of whiskey. On Harry's other side is Ken, who's got a full six pack of beer scattered in his coverall pockets. He could fit more, but the rest of the space is holding Cokes for Rosie. Who isn't sober, for once, and sipping from Ken's flask when he's not sipping his soda. Bucky and Buck are next to them. Buck sober as a judge as always, Bucky definitely into his cups but not wild about it. He's watching the bottle in the middle of the circle with rapt attention. It's his spin. 

It lands on Brady, and there's a holler as everyone drinks. It's one of the rules, though Harry doesn't know where it came from: Bucky and Brady will not be kissing, thank you, but everyone drinks if one of them lands on the other.

"It's your face," Hambone says to Brady. "It doesn't have character like mine. You're too pretty to kiss."

"No he's not," Harry says. No one hears him because Brady's currently threatening to give Hambone more gold teeth, and Douglass is threatening to stick him in the bomb drop if he tries. And now Blakely is speaking up from Brady's other side, promising he'll kick Douglass out of his fort without a chute if he tries. And everyone else is laughing, even Jack. Which tells Harry how hammered they all are, really. That Jack would join in at all. 

"You okay, Harry?" Bubbles murmurs as Brady takes the bottle and sends it spinning. He's the only one who knows about Harry's crush. Well, the only one Harry's told. He's seen some looks from Hambone and Bucky that tell him they're suspicious, but no one's made him confess.

"No one heard me, right?" Harry asks, just to be sure. He knows they're all good and drunk–well, not Buck, but he never brings up the fact that he remembers literally every stupid thing they've done, bless him–but it takes more than drinking straight from the pitcher to quiet his brain. 

"Nah, no one heard," Bubbles assures him, patting him on the back. He grins when the bottle lands on him. "Can I tag in Harry?" he asks. 

"BUBBLES!" Harry shouts. 

"Sure," Brady says. "Long as it's not Bucky."

"Fuck you, Brady."

"Cleven, control your dog," Brady replies. 

"Hey, Meatball considers that offensive!' Demarco hollers. He's laid out on the runway next to Jack, head resting on Meatball's side. He's supposed to be judge for any spins that land between guys, but he's mostly been dozing.

"Meatball eats sheep shit," Brady says, which makes Bucky shout, "Yeah!" and everyone is laughing again, Harry included. 

When he's done laughing, he realizes Brady as slipped across the circle and is nearly nose-to-nose with him. "You don't gotta–" Harry says. 

Brady grins and presses his mouth to Harry's. He tastes like whiskey and his pipe tobacco, and when he quivers with a laugh, Harry is certain he's made an embarrassing sound. Brady pulls away and takes the pitcher from Harry's hand. He keeps eye contact as he takes a drink. "Not bad," he says. 

"Uh-huh," Harry says dumbly. Did Brady. Was he. Was that a move?

Brady turns and grabs the empty bottle they're using. "Your turn," he says. He doesn't move away. 

Harry feels bold and drunk and silly. Everyone around them is still talking and joking. Harry taps the lip of the bottle against Brady's chest. "You," he says. 

Brady grins and takes the bottle, shoving it at Bubbles, then tumbling Harry flat on his back on the runway and kissing him hard. 

"Finally!" Hambone yells. 

"You owe me five bucks, Egan!" Jack shouts. 

"Aw, fuck, I really thought they'd chicken out again," Bucky says. 

Harry pulls away from Bardy's mouth to stare at Bucky. "All due respect, Sir. Fuck you." 

Bucky laughs and tumbles against Buck, who catches him and noses his temple. "Aww, Buck, look at our little navigator, all grown up and kissing boys." 

"Be nice," Buck says. He throws Harry a wink. "Some fellas aren't as easy as you."

"No one's as easy as Egan," Douglass says. 

"I'm real good at it!" Bucky crows, and there's a round of cheering that Harry doesn't take part in because he and Brady are still kissing. 

*

In the morning, they're all hungover, save Buck. Even Jack looks like shit. Harry flops into a chair and stares at his coffee, willing himself to reach out and drink it. 

Brady sits next to him, and for a moment, Harry is fearful he doesn't remember last night. Or, worse off, that he does but wants to pretend he doesn't. 

"I would love to make out with you in front of Jack to ruin his day," Brady says. Jack flips him the bird from where he's nursing his coffee. "But my mouth tastes like I liked the hardstand."

Harry feels himself smile when Brady lets out a small groan and sags against him. He pats his cheek softly and finally manages to reach for his coffee. "That's okay," he says. "I can wait."

Late in the afternoon, standing by the runway and watching the clouds, Harry turns towards Brady and pulls him close. He kisses him like he thinks a first kiss should be: Soft and gentle and sweet. Brady returns it, then beams and pulls him into the taller grass, tumbles him to the ground like he'd done the night before and kisses him that way again. 

Harry smiles into it and thinks it's even better sober.

[marcusrobertobaq]

Sav Dan's Shop (Android Zone) exploration and commentary

⚠️ The quality is just terrible

This Android Zone is called SAV SHOP in the game files. Where is it located within Detroit? No fucking clue. There's a similar destroyed Android Zone in Kara's BfD. Dunno if they're the same.

They sell new and pre-owned androids, components, repairs even some electronics and some other shit like that. Real average small tech shop.

"Kalu's Tool"? What a name. No idea wtf it is but this Uke Antivirius is kinda funny 🤪 I just can't read the text at all, bro.

Idk what these RXL things are but ok. Reading "robot" i assume is related to those robots from the concept art. But maybe can be used in androids?

Now those LVB ones:

LVB MACRODATA 7850: Move effortlessly between Androids applications with a powerful processor.

LVB "300% ENERGY": Move effortlessly between applications with a powerful processor.

LVB SMOOTH 2.2: Help preventing further darkening and protect the skin from premature erosion

Ok, we're talking about 2 processors and one stuff for the skin? THE SKIN AIN'T A HOLOGRAM CONFIRMED.

Now, man, now look the size of that shit right there, this EYE™️ component.

Gotta be for those heavy work models. It says TR600 and the heavy model we know is TR400. Maybe a new gen? But, man, still too "big" xD that's what she said

As u can see, androids parts ain't "hollow". Ain't supposed to be, at least. Also u can notice how androids are made with "easy limbs detachment and replacement" in mind, the cables in the joints are basically plug/unplug. Still weird tho.

Say hi to the Roomba

Other android parts they sell are these "patellas" (the knee the joint) and legs/arms. Also those "Thirium cells"...

Kinda different from the regulator we know, huh? They also got a whole M series shit going on related to that patella thing i'll leave this link cuz these textures are ridiculous. Means some models series are named with one letter only, the second letter being variations of the same "model family".

"POWER UNIT" and it's part of a UPGRADE PACK. Also a "GENUINE PARTS PROGRAM" idk what this means. Maybe pirated and cheap 3D printed components are a thing, we see these machines in Jericho.

I still don't know how these limbs works in practice, sometimes the joints just...doesn't make any sense in my head.

I ain't got no idea what those small boxes are. "Dust Cover"? What?

No idea what the triangle thing is, there's nothing on the box. Judging by being a triangle must be something related to androids (ofc).

Also boxes like that purple and red ones are CABLE PACKS (from AFC?). I can notice there are some formats (one of 'em really similar to the one Zlatko uses when plugging into Kara)

U can see a Hard Disk, Wireless and "Tabs" icons there. I'm not sure what that means, maybe u can used to connect these things O.o

And ofc...CLOTHES.

They sell clothes for androids? I mean, ain't got the markings we are used to and they look pretty generic but still something.

On the table we see what looks like empty thirium bag, an opened triangle-shaped box then below the Uke Antivirus, other cable packs, dust covers, regulators, eye components, audio processing components and some other shit that looks like HDs and SSDs

This SATA III SSD also comes in 8TB, 4TB and 2TB. Wtf xD

An honorable mention to the Android Compartments (feat Kara without a head)

I personally think it should also be a recharging point too but, well, doesn't look like one - but how tf this shit's detecting the android status then? Whatever, i hc they can recharge in there.

[fierrochase-falafel]

Guanyin temple thoughts (AKA nothing can stop a dramatic bisexual)- spoilers!

I'm reading the Guanyin temple scene in MDZS at the moment and LORD none of the media censoring Wangxian's gay relationship will ever be able to convey just how much Jin Guangyao got upstaged by them here-!!!

Especially comparing this whole fiasco with the one that went down in CQL, every few lines these 2 are doing SOMETHING really gay, usually also really funny because of the timing, while everyone else is paying attention to the plot. In CQL, this whole arc felt like a culmination to Jin Guangyao's and Lan Xichen's subliminally gay plotline more than anything, but the great thing about the novel is that Wei Wuxian especially just keeps stealing Jin Guangyao's thunder. First they have to deal with Wei Wuxian's obliviousness, then Wei Wuxian confesses, then Wangxian have their really sweet moment and spend every moment hereafter making their gayness known to all in a 5 mile radius (case in point: Wei Wuxian taunting Su She and making Lan Wangji laugh, Wangxian hugging and being super loud about it because of Wei Wuxian's trauma-induced cynophobia and then Wei Wuxian covering Lan Wangji's ears from the wrongly-played guqin)...and THEN Jiang Cheng and Wei Wuxian have THEIR moment while Jin Guangyao is discovering his mother's body is missing. Jin Guangyao's antagonism almost means nothing anymore.

Not to mention, Jin Guangyao is barely an antagonist for over half of this entire scenario. Even though he's keeping them all hostage, it's not like some of them have better things to be doing really (read: Wangxian and Nie Huaisang). All the catharsis they'd desperately needed for years, they're getting that here anyways. Jin Guangyao literally joins in on getting Wei Wuxian to realise his feelings, almost like it's a casual gossip sesh giving life advice to your (gay) sworn brother's son-in-law-to-be:

Wei WuXian glanced at him before turning to Lan XiChen, “It’s like this. I couldn’t sleep tonight and took a stroll outside the inn. I only came here accidentally. HanGuang-Jun’s in another room. He doesn’t know I went out.”

Jin GuangYao found this strange, “You two got two rooms?”

Wei WuXian, “Who told you we’d definitely get one room?

Jin GuangYao smiled, but said nothing. Wei WuXian, “Oh, I know.” Lan XiChen told him. Wei WuXian, “You two really do talk about anything and everything.”

This does NOT feel like a hostage situation- this just feels like a gathering of people who would be happier with extensive therapy. And...I have nothing useful to say really. I just think this is really funny. Especially when you consider how Wangxian's presence in the farce that was the Second Seige of the Burial Mounds (that legit just happened) derailed how THAT was supposed to go too, with Wei Wuxian solving the mystery of the gravedigger guy in live-time while Lan Wangji silenced anyone trying to argue with his bf.

Jin Guangyao and Su She are being sidelined hard in their own plot, and not just by the oriole to their mantis AKA mastermind Nie Huiasang. Even though they are supposed to be the main antagonists facing a climax, the real climax is the resolution of emotional conflict between the hostages they've taken. As for their fate, that was decided years ago when Jin Guangyao accelerated Nie Mingjue's death. The actual plot, interesting as it is, was barely ever in question because of the constant background presence of this mastermind, who's trapped Jin Guangyao exactly where he wanted to. There is no real defeating of the villain, because Jin Guangyao is made to be at his weakest in the temple, and his strongest before Wei Wuxian was even summoned back yet. It's so strange...it really sets in stone that in the novel MDZS, there is no real villain. There are people who learn from their mistakes, people who don't, and people who judge them as if they're any better. Nie Huiasang is Jin Guangyao's retribution for his continued crimes and Wei Wuxian is the person Jin Guangyao could've been if he stopped blaming others for said crimes...both of them, subtly or unsubtly, dominate his hostage attempt completely. Maybe that's what I'm really trying to say here. I do feel quite bad for Jin Guangyao though, having put his entire life into building up a reputation knocked over in 1 fell swoop, and having to watch his only true remaining friend lose trust in him in real time. All this additional conflict just further emphasises how Jin Guangyao's fall from grace has really already occurred.

Sidenote: Everyone becoming homophobic effective immediately after Wei Wuxian's ill-timed confession is also just really funny, they were so mad at his obliviousness like 2 seconds ago and now they're edging away from him (maybe to give them space, sure, but still)...Wei Wuxian, in all matters, is the epitome of "damned if you do, damned if you don't". Except for Jiang Cheng, in which case he's just straight-up damned (/lh).

Also the way they're yelling (it doesn't say they were yelling but I picture them yelling this) about hugging when Jiang Cheng shows up and while everyone else is like, "What's Sect Leader Jiang going to do? Will he beat Jin Guangyao? Will the plot advance?"

Wei WuXian, “Hug me!”

Lan WangJi, “I am hugging you!”

Wei WuXian, again, “Hug me tight!”

Lan WangJi, also, “I am hugging you tight!”

Managed to upstage not just Jin Guangyao but Jiang Cheng too, effortlessly, as Wei Wuxian always seems to :,) Take that, Jiang Cheng's pride! /lh

These guys have been separated for 13 years, ok? They deserve to have this.

[hmshermitcraft]

Poly boatem for theme!

Boatem a rather well known team of antiheroes whose crimes are usually just limited to burglary, some murder and defacing public property with advertisements about themselves which causes the hero and villain groups no end to their frustrations! You have Mumbo aka Jumbobot who makes all sorts of contraptions that he sells to both heroes and villains whenever he’s not fighting them with said contraptions, Scar aka Hotguy the one man on the team without powers but has killed hundreds more then anyone else on the team with his annoying quiver of trick arrows. Then there’s Pearl aka Scarlet Moon who is…unhinged around anyone that’s not her partners armed with an axe and an army of ghost wolves she tries doing good buutttt it’s so hard when heroes try and impose rules on her, and Grian aka Poultry Man which people make the mistake of underestimating him all the time but fun and games are over when your suddenly dealing with hundreds of feathers turning you into a pincushion, and finally Impulse aka Dwarf he tries to be the good guy of the team but it’s hard not prancing the heroes and villains with silly statuses of themselves or sudden potholes in their secret bases.

Now the four weren’t always a team or together heck they used to be each others worst enemies! But it all started when Scar and Grain teamed up to help some heroes to try and stop Pearl from letting out all the animals in the zoo loose which admittedly to the two was funny in some regards but they’ll play good for now. So they arrive and the heroes and the two were just confused when they saw Pearl and Mumbo getting chased by a overgrown robot wolf that Mumbo had built to distract the heroes how was Mumbo supposed to know to ghost wolf proof it?! So while the heroes dealt with the robot wolf Scar and Grian tried to chase down Mumbo and Pearl down halfway across town only to get caught up in Impulse robbing a jewel store!

Safe to say the day couldn’t get more confusing until they all just collectively agreed to go hide at Impulse’s “lair” aka his apartment til the adrenaline wore off. Where during that time the five actually began to see past their persona’s and the people underneath granted they weren’t all that different from their persona’s but they began to see each other as more then just antiheroes who occasionally ran into each other. And the coming months whenever they saw each other they either turned a blind eye or let them be stopped depending on which side they were following that day.

Before one day after a huge city wide battle between two of the stronger hero and villain groups Pearl popped the question of if they’d wanna move in together and it was history from there…well after they sat on one of the buildings watching the heroes and villains fight it was better then daytime television!

Rando anon

It's nice to have people they vibe with. None of them feel forced to be too 'good' or 'bad'. They can just be themselves. Whatever that means on the day.

Impulse prefers helping others, but he won't put aside his principles for it (not like some of the heroes do.) Grian enjoys his silliness - sometimes it's helpful, sometimes it's not! It's always fun, for him, anyway. Mumbo doesn't want to limit his market! He's proud of his creations, and getting too tied to one side or the other is a recipe for disaster.

Scar thinks the whole 'no murder' thing heroes do is stupid. Pearl completely agrees, why should other people decide how she uses her talents! Plus the good guys judge her wolves and that makes her grumpy.

So, they're happy as a relationship! Joking about the heroes and villains alike, they don't discriminate.

[inventors-fair]

Partner Commentary: It Takes Two

I don't play politics, I don't play 2HG—this contest really was for the gimmick, wasn't it? Not that there's anything wrong with that but my goodness do I not know how to evaluate anything past individual cards... Or not, like, I get how cards are supposed to come together. But that's different than how we all come together here as designers to share our love of the game! Sort of. Maybe I'm trying not to let this metaphor go out of whack. Maybe I should just take my lumps.

One of those lumps is the fact that most the cards this week were really darn good. Like, I had a hard time really choosing a favorite, and there's something that I liked about each and every submission. It's a shame when there's a huge discrepancy in design strengths, and a unique gift when there's strength everywhere. Not too many entries, but I ain't gonna complain. This wasn't the easiest contest, after all.

As my partners do their own things in this office, I'm typing away here, and shall remind folks: Judge Picks are cards that have a specific feature I wanna showcase and/or they were just cool and I wanted to gush about them. Let's skip off into the sunset together and read some commentary!

@deg99 — Famed Poet & Ghost Writer (JUDGE PICK)

Poetry, my lifeblood! So there's the implicit team-versus-you issue to be handled (that's not really an issue at all I suppose) where this feels like a singleton card more than a team card at first glance, but the more that you read the more that you can actually work with these cards quite well. I think that I'd've worded the Poet's trigger to say "from graveyards" instead of "from a graveyard" because then you can both hose your opponents' cards AND help the Ghost Writer. These cards work oddly well, actually.

And as for the flavor, Lorehold and Silverquill (...those were the names, right?) do indeed come together for a neat little flavor package. I actually expected the ghost to have flying, but that's up to you, and the spirits not having flying was kind of on par for Strixhaven. These are an odd flavor couple, and I think I'd want to hear more about it—is the writer writing for the poet, or is the ghostwriting pun just a pun? What's their relationship in-universe? I would also understand if they're just buddy-buddy but you've made, again, an implicit link that's mildly frustrating to puzzle out—frustrating in a fun way though! Am I overthinking? [Editor's note: always.]

~

@horsecrash — Ruin Explorer & Ruin Hulk

I wouldn't call these these the most unique mechanical pair. It also follows that with team stuff, these cards don't necessarily help in any 2HG play. For single-player, though, this is a limited slam. The Ruin Explorer is a great build-around-me card for an archetype, and the Hulk can go into any deck without really worrying about what else you need. Big constructs are big. Or rather, not a construct, but a golem. I was wondering, and constructs/golems do indeed have different vibes. I like the vibe of Golem here, good choice.

Does every card need to have teammates in mind? I know I didn't say it was 100% necessary, but there are some benefits to it. Putting counters on creatures that aren't your own could matter, as could having other players make treasure tokens. But just to end on a strength, the Zendikar feel resonates with me strongly here and the relationship makes sense. One more thing that's cool is that the colorless golem, as I mentioned could go into any kind of deck that needs it. That's still a cool concept for the team implication, that one player can just have it in without forcing color.

~

@i-am-the-one-who-wololoes — Inspired Scholar & Muse of Magic

It's cute! It's quite cute, actually, and I think there's almost a throwback to Dominaria, old-school Tolarian kids, where the humor hits for me. I did chuckle at Inspired Scholar's line—is it a bit sitcomesque? Well, yeah, but it's still funny. And the reply on the Muse's card is heartwarming! The relationship between the pair of them on the cards comes across as well, so you've nailed that aspect.

Mechanically, I'm stumbling on the fact that, without the other, these are basically dead cards. Like, literally vanilla. It's a flavorful win that they need each other. We have to keep the mechanics in mind as well. So, how would we go about fixing this? Not too hard—just have a mechanic that's kinda-decent but gets better if you have a card of a certain type. What if the wizard reduced the costs a little, but by 2 instead of 1 if you control a Spirit? Something like that. BTW, for the muse, red's ward costs have been pretty centered in life instead of mana, but I don't know if that's a standard. Might wanna check up on that because I don't have an answer.

~

@jestingmaniac — Reckless Roustabout & Dogged Detective

[Sorry about the lack of @/tagging, Tumblr is acting up!]

Perhaps typing your art direction into your submission when you send it in can make things a little more legible? Also, uh, did the flavor texts get reversed? There's a lot happening here, and it's not the least of your worries that Dogged Detective is already a card name. Let's slow down, ease up, and be more methodical and less Roustabouty. I really do like this relationship you've built between cards! Genuinely love it. These two have that cat-and-mouse feeling you wrote about and I can see that playing out great on the battlefield as well.

For the Reckless Roustabout: Haste and the can't-block line should be separate lines. I actually didn't see the haste part of it, and thought it would give itself haste. Regardless—for multiplayer shenanigans, perhaps it could just give up to one target creature haste, to help out a friend in need. For the Dogged Detective: aside from a name change, this card's pretty awesome. If you wanted to up the team side, the ability could be: "When ~ enters the battlefield, target player may return up to one creature they control to its owner's hand." Win-win all around. Again, lots of awesome ideas, friendly flavor, but we gotta work on presentation as well. I want to read all the stuff you're sending in!

~

@just--a--penguin — Disrupting Geist & Demanding Fiend

This is an odd little grouping, isn't it. Double flying creatures is pretty crazy, but not the strangest thing in the world. I particularly enjoy the parts where you have opposing goals for different deck types, or at least you can slow-roll one and aggro the other. Kind of. I don't know for sure; these do feel like they want to be part of the same deck, less team-based and more eat-your-face-off in a single UB flash deck. If both teammates are playing flash decks, that's even worse, but I'm not opposed.

Not sure how the AD is supposed to be depicted here, TBH? Maybe from different angles, but these both feel Innistradian quite comfortably by themselves. I wonder what the true relationship is between spirits and demons on the plane. There's some kind of partnership being forged, yeah, and I don't know if I'm necessarily sold. Again, each card works great individually and both feel like they can inhabit the same space. The sense of togetherness isn't quite hitting me.

~

@misterstingyjack — Bonded Lifeweaver & Fanged Lifegorger

Make the lifelinkers even lifelinkier, and make the vampires even more vampyrical! I am hesitant to point out: there are no vampires on Ikoria. I checked, and as best I can tell, yeah, no, not a single one. Nightmares might have been the better option to go for. All the same, yeah, the cards are still good together. If the Lifeweaver had had an "up to one" clause without "you control," might've been better for the team side of things, but that's about all the mechanical and flavorful quibbles I have. They're big gameplay quibbles; that'll only come out on the battlefield, though.

Paying the life for the card advantage can get absolutely bonkers but the restriction is fine. How much life does one person need to gain before it becomes negligible? I'd play that card in my Kambal deck for sure, and following that, in a limited format where you can perhaps buff it with cards like the Lifeweaver, well, then you're all set to jam. Very powerful all around, and I like that you pushed the power level there! Some of these cards feel like folks were holding back, but I might be used to FIRE design...

~

@sombramainexe — Tenth District Insurgent & Tenth District Assassin

So strange how two different upbringings can result in two different mindsets, with the same kind of goal on the same street. These cards have quite a dichotomy between them, and the deckbuilding reflects that in sensible ways. Small attackers meets a lose-lose situation and all. I think that either one of them going down can be still strong for your team. If you wanna go for team-based stuff, you can replace "you control" with a similar clause that's "during your turn" and it'll be the same result.

I'm a little curious about the assassin, actually. What's up with the vivacity of the flavor text? They both feel rebellious, but the assassin feels like they need a little bit more, like, survival instinct. What ever happened to the covert side of it? The Massacre Girl may be more inspirational than we could've hoped for... What I mean is that it feels a bit off-flavor, personally, to have an assassin use a rebel's line. The Insurgent feels on-point, so that's all good, and I get how the flavor's trope reflects the mechanical aspect. Feels like it could've been a bit skewed towards the subtleties of contract killing, that's all. 

~

@sparkyyoungupstart — Displaced Orchid & Nyxborn Pollinator (JUDGE PICK)

I'm so sorry to start with this, but both the "it's" in your orchid's flavor text should've been "its." Anyway, this kind of relationship is fascinating and I'm actually kind of floored that you brought back this analog—yes, I'm familiar—in a manner that works so perfectly. Mechanics critique: I don't think you needed the Inspired action on the Pollinator, but I like what the card is doing. (And I know it's an uncommon, lol, small tweak.) The Orchid is fine, too, perhaps a little single-player coded, but whatever, you gotta have your own garden. The Pollinator could make plants for you and each person on your team if need be.

Still, the Pollinator has to sow in order for the orchid to reap. That's perfect! If the pollinator dies, the Orchid only has itself to work with, until the plants die out. That's perfectly anguish-inducing! But that's just their relationship, isn't it... And the fact that the Nyxborn of Theros have the connection to the underworld, or at least they can be and they come across as such here, is a joyful throwback that shows an acute knowledge of how to connect MTG worlds and real-world ideas in an thoughtful and impactful manner. I'm truly impressed. What I wonder is for the worldbuilding, if the Orchid could've perhaps been a Dryad instead? Or a Caryatid, because Caryatids are the only plant-types on Theros that I can find. "She sings ardently in the grove, but her petals fall in silence." I dunno. Something schmaltzy. 

~

@tavi-en-astra — Sweetheartist & Maestros Heart Thief

This is a card that I'm really not sure works in the rules. Honestly, it's also far too narrow unless the whole set is based around soulbond, and I'm not convinced that that's reasonable. The amount of text on these cards is already pushing it with partner there. Conceptually, there's a lot to like about the relationship you've build. What I feel happened, and correct me if I'm wrong, is that the strength of the relationship turned into a story where every part felt like it had to be captured, and following that the cards ended up with the amount of text that they do to get those niche details.

Sweetheartist is honestly fine, if narrow. Most of the baggage falls to the Heart Thief. Put simply, soulbond doesn't allow you to pair with your opponents' creatures, and even if it did, soulbond reflects shared abilities; there's no mechanical resonance with how soulbond is supposed to work and what it's doing on the Heart Thief. If you want to make creatures attack, that's all fine and good. Firkraag is actually a card you could look at! If creatures had to attack, there's a bonus to be had, and that's basically what the Sweetheartist wants. So, there's a lot happening here... I think the killers' connection is nice, the multicolor cards are daring, and the flavor text is well-written. Narrowing your focus allows for the mechanics to do what they're supposed to do.

~

@wildcardgamez — Prodigy Gemcrafter & Filigree Firefox (JUDGE PICK)

Where does this pair live? I'm going to assume Kaladesh, because I wanna. Kamigawa was my first thought because of Reconfigure but I'm flexible. Either way, I love the manner in which these cards feels like they belong to and with each other, and the joy of crafting that comes with one and the other. Treasures abound, which is nice, and continuing to give double strike is going to be wonderful if you can get the pinging off the Fox. Now, I had to reread Simian Sling, but that "it" in the text box is so frustrating to me, and I know how it's supposed to work and I hate how it's just barely getting there in my brain.

Hardly matters, though, because the rules say what they say and what can I do about it. Uniquely, this is the only monocolor pairing that we have! I think that in a team game, the ability to fetch something up for yourself will be useful, and if you're playing casual/EDH/whatever by yourself, you'll be fine, so that's all set. What would it be like if two players on a team each had a single color? That would be quiet interesting indeed, not impossible, but certainly hard to pull off. Splashing is fun, too. Who knows? Either way, the whole shebang feels neat enough to point out as being, well, neat enough.

That's all! Tune in tomorrow for cards, cards, and more cards. @abelzumi

[midnightactual]

Well to answer your question about "mentor" Yoruichi it's a archetype and the way Kubo writes character interactions being very poop and unrealistic. For example Isshin's the daddy but he doesn't act like one, Yoruichi and Urahara are the mentor's but vaguely if ever act like it, the karakura gang are close friends but vaguely if never act like it, the soul society is the ally but vaguely if never acts like it ect. This is probably the biggest problem with Kubo's writing dude does not know how to flush out character interactions. On a side note why do you think Yoruichi treats Ichigo like insect she's about to step on minus the Kubo factor? (Parallel to that could you imagine how Yoruichi would have treated Ichigo if she found him 2 inches tall in rirukas doll house she'd fuck with him so hard 🤣)

I want to be very clear that I don't think Kubo is a good writer in most capacities. He's usually pretty mid at best (and when he is good it's usually far too subtle to be effective) and has all kinds of flaws. However, this conception of his writing—and I don't mean offense by saying this—is very small-minded and inaccurate.

What I mean by that is when you analyze and evaluate a piece of writing, judging whether something was intentional or not requires careful consideration. The main criteria for such is determining whether what you're seeing is happenstance or if it forms a persistent and consistent pattern.

And the things you're describing are indeed persistent and consistent. Kubo is not bad at portraying character interactions. He is intentionally not having his characters interact in order to convey something. It's a theme, not an error, and the theme is alienation and isolation. It's a commentary on the lived Japanese experience.

You're not supposed to come away thinking that Kubo sucks at writing friendships. You're supposed to understand that the "friendships" portrayed are vapid and superficial. Orihime's reason for wanting to be around Ichigo initially is "he makes funny faces". Chad is willing to die for Ichigo because he once intervened in Chad being bullied and saved a coin (that didn't even wind up being his Fullbring—that was not a mistake, it was a deliberate choice to tell you the coin was never what was actually important). Uryū tags along because of inertia. These people aren't actually good friends. This is directly called out in the "fight" between Shunsui and Chad:

Well, the truth is that not only are Ichigo's friendships with Orihime and Uryū thin, because they too have only been a thing for 2 months at this point, but actually Ichigo's friendship with Chad is thin too because they've only known each other for a year or so, which is hardly any better. (Only Ichigo's friendship with Rukia is actually notable because "she changed his world".)

You're supposed to understand these people are actually really bad friends. The manga repeatedly makes this point.

They don't hang out. They don't confide in one another. They don't trust each other. They don't even particularly like one another. They're really more acquaintances of circumstance than friends.

That's why they end up like this. Largely alone. Isolated. Mostly ignoring one another. This pseudo-Renaissance arrangement is framed like this, just like the real ones, for a very good reason.

That reason is why Uryū is facing away up above, didn't go to Ichigo's watching party of Chad's boxing match, and is sitting in the background here in the bottom-right by himself.

Q370: In the new one shot Ichigo says that he's over at Keigo's ramen shop with everyone. By everyone, who exactly is he referring to? Besides Mizuiro, who else was there with him? Chad too? A370: The guy sitting in the back is Uryu.

So once you understand that what you're seeing with interpersonal relationships of all kinds in Bleach is not a mistake, but a very deliberate, intentional, and methodical choice, and you see how "friends" treat one another, you can see how ridiculous the "mentor" notion truly is, and how it comes out of nowhere.

It's not that Yoruichi (and Kisuke and so on) are portrayed as being bad at being mentors because Kubo doesn't know how to write that kind of thing. It's that they, the characters themselves, really do not give a shit about these kids but are nonetheless forced to rely on them. And yes, that is exactly how they think of them (as does Kūkaku):

"Boy". "Fool". "Stupid child". "Kids". "Fool".

This isn't a mistake.

As for why this is from Yoruichi's end, I've sort of answered it before, but I'll give you the tl;dr: Yoruichi is a professional soldier and Ichigo is a naïve child soldier. Of course she finds his presence and relying upon him aggravating. Imagine attaching a 16-17 year-old high school student to a Navy SEAL team on an infiltration mission. They'd absolutely hate it.

Anyway, this goes back to my point: imagining that these people are actually close is exactly like believing everything an ad says about how a product will make you attractive or popular or cool or whatever. It's wishful thinking that originates from buy-in as to what you're told and want to believe is true rather than what you actually see if you pay attention.

It's not real.

[cf56]

Concerning the reblog mentioning your WIPs, I found it was a perfect chance to ask about your WIPs titled Coma and Depression? I’ve been curious about them for a while. What are they of? What are you willing to share?

I love you for this question!

Coma is about Yakko waking up after having been in a coma for over 20 years. He wakes up in his room and asks a nurse how long he's been out, then just utters "sibs..." in worry before he passes out again.

There were two ways I was considering taking it after that. One, Yakko goes back to his sibs but has a hard time coming back into their lives, since they've adjusted to life without him and Wakko has long since slipped into the big brother role for Dot.

The other idea was that Yakko goes home to find out he was replaced for all those 20 years. The studio drew a new Yakko to take care of Wakko and Dot, and now that the original Yakko woke up, it causes problems. Wakko and Dot bonded with this new one, and the two Yakkos are different in some ways and compete for big brothership. This was the more interesting option to me, but I also concluded that Wakko and Dot would never accept a replacement Yakko as their brother. That's kind of where this wip died.

(TW: Suicide attempt and depression)

So as you have already gleaned, Depression was quite an angsty fic. That's kind of an understatement. The underlying idea was that Yakko became depressed, kind of having a monologue about how toons can't get physical diseases, but they can definitely get mental ones. The fic is told from his perspective as he struggles with it.

It starts with him listening to the show of a toon self-help celebrity. He's afraid to tell anyone he's depressed because such things are looked down upon for toons. They're supposed to be funny and lighthearted, not discuss serious mental issues. Even the existence of this toon self-help guy is controversial. Some toons despise him for "making a mockery" of their profession. Yakko's even afraid that his siblings will judge him for it if they learned of his issues.

They can tell that he isn't himself, of course, but he does a good enough job covering it up. He suffers in silence until he finally breaks and makes an attempt on his own life. Possibly utilizing dip.

The attempt fails, and his siblings are obviously traumatized. Wakko doesn't understand the concept at all. He later asks Yakko why he wanted to do it. "Don't you like being with us?"

That's as far as I thought about it in detail. It would have ended with him healing and overcoming his depression. I think this fic is probably too heavy for me to ever finish and release. I also may not have the experience necessary to handle these issues respectfully and realistically. So, I wouldn't really expect either of these fics to ever come out.

Thank you so, so much for asking about my wips! It's always a perfect time to do so! I'll gleefully talk about any of them, as well as any of my released fics, until the sun stops shining.

[thebananwithaplan]

Drabble: Pilot Episode (part 1)

Part 2

"What do you mean they're not coming?"

If was the day that the pilot episode of Shovelware's Brain Game would commence recording. A test run, if you will. Everything inside of Sound Stage 7 looked remotely the same as its appearance from the first couple of episodes except for the doors by the audience seats had the brain on them instead of Banana's familiar smiling face. The CEO of Shovelware Studios originally intended to watch how the recording would go with the original host and crew appointed by SMART Tech's reps, but...

🎙️ "Last I heard, they were celebrating the host's birthday at his place yesterday. But I guess when they tried to light up the birthday candle, the thing exploded."

"So, like, it was a dynamite stick?"

🎙️ "Probably. They're all at the hospital right now, and honestly I'm not even sure if they're gonna make it out, but hey, I wasn't fond of that guy that they chose, anyways."

"Yeesh....." Well. Huh. That didn't sound good. Hopefully they'll recover by the time that the show would officially picked up for the season...

...That would be a big 'would', though. He still needed a host, camera operator, production manager, and even someone to pull the curtain for the prizes. Where was he supposed to find them in a short amount of time?

This was bad. If he can't get the live pilot episode going at all, he was certain SMART Tech would retract their sponsorship. And that would be a big sum of money lost. It's not like the Studio could afford such a loss as it wasn't as popular as it was now, back then.

"....Maybe we can help, uncle!" Peel piped up, being followed by his brothers. "We've seen how your other shows work. I can be the production manager!"

"I can, like, work the cameras."

"And I can pull the curtain!"

🎙️ "Aren't you three a little young to be part of a Hollywood show crew?"

"So what? It doesn't even look that hard! I bet we can do it just as well as grownups can!"

Their uncle stood quiet, moving only to pick up a spare microphone that the original host left behind.

"I mean.... even if you guys can do all of that, we still need a host."

🎙️ "...D-don't look at me. I don't do well in front of an audience. I'm fine staying inside the recording booth where I know people won't judge me with their eyes."

"...Why don't you be the host, Uncle?"

"Yeah! Uncle should do it! He's super funny, too!"

"H-hey, come on, now. Bein' a gameshow host and playing pretend as one so you boys get motivated to study harder at home are two very different things."

"Well, how different is it, really? It's mostly questions from our homework, anyways."

"....I mean, I guess, but....." Banana was honored that his boys thought he'd be good enough for the main role of the show. But it's been ages since he's last let himself be highly visible in public, having remained low-profile since having taken the nephews in.

....The recording is supposed to start soon.

......... He supposed they'll just have to wing it. All out or nothing.