#don’t mind me just editing the tags bc i made spelling mistakes
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every time i replay kotsam or kotdan i am once again struck by my love for the main ten for a multitude of reasons. lemme babble abt each of them a bit:
(under the cut—spoilers to kotsam and kodan if you haven’t finished them)
altair: boyf. boyfriend. ive replayed kotsam like ten times and have romanced him five times. im in love with this man he’s so sweet but also one of the author’s posts compared him to julian and said some rly cryptic shit so?? go off multi-dimensional king i’ll love you no matter what. definite favoritism here bc im a sucker for the sweet, supportive older siblings of the mc’s friend who has a secret hidden within. im pretty sure my nickname in the discord server is still “#1 altair simp” even tho i don’t check it anymore but the statement still rings true
astrid: gf wife mwah mwah mwah im in love with the adtaz siblings. simply.... she’s so great and i wish her the best bc she’s a terrific friend to the mc and is painfully funny at times. also her thing with leon is just MWAH i only romanced her once bc of this
cressy: scares me a little bit but i am also severely attracted to her bc goddamn i love women that can verbally (or physically, but that’s for thalia) tear me apart. ur so cool and i will romance u soon
cyrus: god what a man. what a man. im also in love with you quite strongly and i would like to wrap myself in your jacket and hold you close. i want to stargaze on the roof with you, cider in hand, and talk until it goes cold and then some. i want to look into your eyes and know that you love me just as much as i love you. my eyes water with joy whenever i see you in a scene
katia: BABEY!!!!! SUNSHINE GIRL!!! TERRIFYINGLY CRYPTIC IN THAT ONE SCENE IN KODAN AT THE BALCONY BEFORE THE ATTACK! i love her sm but i never got around to romancing her which is an absolute crime. anyways 10/10 would kiss and die for
kol: my bro. brother without blood. i keep friendzoning you my bad but also i can’t see you as anything but family. ur so sweet and also???? i definitely forgive you for the whole betrayal thing and i wish your family the best. ilysm king mwah and im sorry abt (reluctantly) spying on ur date w ur boyfriend
leon: himbo. well not really but im saying that anyway. i was the one who made that “what if we kissed by the manatees” meme and im proud of it bc mr leon “chad” dalton deserves a smooch next to a manatee show. romanced you in kostam but not in kodan yet which i will get to later or maybe not bc i like you and astrid together too much. you’ve got a lot of issues and i would like to give you a hug
sera: you.... frigid girls that are emotionally distant with severe family-related trauma? damn you are exactly the kind of character i like playing which means i gravitate towards u maybe just a bit though i haven’t romanced you yet bc im scared of what angst i will find by also playing a kitsune and investigating your family’s demise. i do like ur hair and would like to braid it
thalia: i am SLAMMING my FUCKING FIST on the TABLE rn..... ms thalia sato you are wildly chaotic and wild and full of depth and im???? so fucking in love w u... especially w suzume. the way you are portrayed makes me inspired to be a better writer with all the turmoil your very existence brings. holy shit i want to marry you but also feel like you wouldn’t be thrilled about being tied down and honestly i will do whatever u want
yakov: i NEED to get to ur romance route but much like sera im a little scared of what may come. just like her ur pretty distant and mysterious and full of angst but ive seen snippets of your vulnerable side and hoooo wee am i excited (but still scared)
essentially i just. love them all
#kotsam#kotdan#keeper of the sun and moon#keeper of day and night#interactive fiction#hosted games#man..............#me. me simp#me big simp#and i am proud of it#don���t mind me just editing the tags bc i made spelling mistakes
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Campaign 2 Wrap Up: Anna Potatoesandsunshine Edition
Seemed like it would be fun to go through all the fan content I made for this campaign and try to find at least one thing I like about each thing! Kind of like looking back through a photo album. Under the cut because as it turns out, I wrote kind of a lot! (As in, 21 fics and 3 playlists kind of a lot!)
the sea, once it casts its spell (fjord speculation, what’s up with all this ocean stuff?? the fic)
The first thing I wrote for c2, wayyy in the beginning of things. We had no idea about Uk’otoa or Avantika or anyone at this point, it was pure ocean vibes for my favorite warlock. I really like how hard I leaned in on the “the ocean follows Fjord to land” idea.
so many things will fill my life (but only one will do) (post-campaign cali/jester fluff, written the night of the cali episode and so sweet it could rot your teeth)
This one is just good. I just did good with this one. I’m one of those people who hates their own work the night of posting and then when looking back at it goes, “Wow, this is great.” My favorite thing is the little gifts sent along with the letters! Cali was so fun and cute :)
when the dust does roam (Beau study up to Episode 42, 2k words of Beau poking at the idea of grief)
Best thing I did in this fic was have Caleb-through-Frumpkin bugging Beau about getting some sleep. They really... they’re siblings, your honor.
“ “Fuck off, I’ll sleep when I’m dead.” Beau picks the bird up and sets him in the hood of her own cloak, out of reach of any weasels or startled monks in the morning. It’d suck to have to tell Caleb that his Frumpkin got eaten by Sprinkle.” C’mon guys, let’s do the sibling dance.
keep your swords out by your sides (the idea for this was, What If Fjord Has Nightmares From Uk’otoa Every Night and just doesn’t remember them)
Assigning everybody a word Uk’otoa had said for each nightmare in this was a challenge; I went into it knowing I wanted Caleb for Learn and Caduceus for Consume and had to guess the rest - for an angry eye snake Uk’otoa didn’t give us a ton of quotes.
“ He reaches over and runs a hand along the wall of the ship. From his touch, mushrooms begin sprouting.” Caduceus starting to decompose the Mistake in the middle of cooking was maybe the best moment in this story for me. Like, yeah. Yeah. Ok you funky little grave cleric.
strange but not a stranger (Caleb & Jester, in the immediate aftermath of Caleb’s charm in Episode 55)
the first of my “the Mighty Nein won’t have these conversations with each other in canon so they have to be had in fic” ideas that turned into a full-fledged story. I still had not discovered the em dash at this point, so the formatting of this makes me cringe a little bit, but this fic was really about The Emotions Of Being Out Of Control which turned out to be a very big Thing for the Mighty Nein.
now this story was when swords were humble (fake academia mixed with a Yasha study)
Honestly I’m still obsessed with the AU I made here where Yasha was just awakening every sword she used without knowing it?? Why did I use that here only?? That might come back. But the best part about this fic is the citations; me at my most in-joke and ridiculous.
through the teeth of this tempest (Written in the immediate aftermath of Episode 69, Yasha internally trying to break Obann’s control over the course of a month.)
The most “I wrote this to cope with canon” fic out of all of them. I was crying writing this, I was so upset that Yasha was gone ugh just remembering it. Still waiting for past me to discover the em dash, I genuinely don’t know why I didn’t know how to do it and I’ve thought about going back and editing all of these but I’m just Not Gonna Do All That. Anyway, I really like how Yasha catches lightning with her sword in this. We all really manifested that happening.
nothing more than what the losers settle for (Time travel, a series of oneshots where each member of the m9 sans Caduceus went back to a different point in the timeline and murdered Trent Ikithon)
This was my longest fic for c2, so I’m mostly just glad it got finished. This happened somewhere around the time Matt released that set of notes that mentioned Trent in more detail and I hated him so much I just had to write him dying six times. That speaks for itself.
Revolutionary!Fjord was also a good turn. He could pull it off, I think.
we’re gonna show ‘em a thing, or two, or three (Jester growing up fluff!)
I really like how I did Jester & Artagan in this, even though he barely appears. Someone better at songwriting than me please write the Dragon Song. Em dash makes an appearance here but the formatting is still wrong. I Am Once Again Asking For Proper Use Of The Em Dash.
the best things (happen while you’re dancing) (Mid-Episode 97 Divergence, Jester taking the reins at the party + hints of jester/beau/yasha bc i still love my girls so much)
Jester’s a little out of character in this, but not wildly so, and it was for the purposes of a Trapped By Societal Convention plot that I wanted her to mastermind so I think it was fine in the end. I’m still fascinated by the way she unbalanced Ludinus Da’leth in basically every interaction they had, and while their scene feels pretty cliche in this... the cliches are there for a reason. They’re so fun to write.
Em dash my beloved, there you are.
plus thirty-one varieties of sacramental wine (The Galavant crossover that truly nobody asked for, Beau + the monks)
Yeah, this one’s just fun. Not much more to say about it. Critical Role and Galavant are both fantasy, but they’re honestly pretty different in tone, and it was fun to write Beau dropped into a comedy musical.
oh we were sea-bound and aimless at best (Purely angst, a What If The Fjord & Orly Resurrections Didn’t Work fic)
Made myself care about Marius with this one, y’all. What more can I say? Beau having to go from first mate to captain was just... deliciously painful, because she would.
lost my shape trying to act casual (Beau & Yasha during travelercon, another mid-episode fic, this time of 104)
Yasha comforting Beau, who feels guilty for not feeling guilty... That Mighty Nein wasn’t lying, Mind Control and Autonomy can be themes. Another in the “the Mighty Nein won’t have these conversations with each other in canon so they have to be had in fic” tank. They really just... didn’t open up to each other for a long time, which made sense, but I wanted them to.
so long as you don’t mind a little dying (Beau & Caduceus, sometime in the peace talks arc)
Keeping with the Mighty Nein Please Talk To Each Other theme, I feel like I did a pretty good job with the late-night conversation energy of this fic. This was at a time when I was looking at Caduceus, can opener in hand, ready to make this firbolg open up about his feelings. Beau in this is prickly and confrontational but only in service of her friend’s well-being.
amber light, bending (Eiselcross speculation, Widofjord and all the messiness therein)
THE widofjord fic of my two widofjord fics. The blueprint. The better one. Finally I got the dynamic figured out. I maintain that the tower is an absolute expression of Caleb’s love for his friends. The way that neither of them have the braincell in this fic... yeah this one is just good.
and a blade between them (Widofjord happening... sometime.)
Okay so this is not as good as amber light and I will never be able to look at it and like it as much, but it was still fun to write. Anyway, the intimacy of shaving someone else. That is good. The tag “if they didn’t want me to think about the blood pact they shouldn’t have made the blood pact” is the most useful takeaway from this fic and is the driving force behind the Fjord/Jester/Caleb fic I’m working on now, so it wasn’t a waste of time or anything.
feel the ground beneath my feet turn into the sky (Post-Campaign Astrid-retires-to-Nicodranas, Astrid/Jester)
This is another one where I’m like “Yeah, this is just good.” Packed full of Wizard Fashion, Artagan making an appearance to rope Astrid into having a happier future, and the power of Going To The Seaside. Good for you, fic-Astrid.
spend your days biting your own neck (Role-reversal where Beau is the one mind-controlled this time and Yasha is the one chasing after her, set very early in the Tomb Takers arc)
So much of this fic is about not saying things aloud - Beau’s POV spends a good chunk on body language and Yasha writes multiple letters on paper and in her own head - but devotion bleeding through anyway because there’s nowhere else for it to go. The two of them go tumbling over a cliff together at the end but Yasha has wings, ugh. Yeah this was a good one.
and blow the dry leaves from the tree (Somewhere before the beauyasha date but otherwise timeline-nonspecific Nicodranas, Yasha & Yeza become friends)
Yasha & Yeza making pancakes together when neither of them know how to do so... is good. This fic is very much about grief sneaking in, but it’s even more about finding someone to share the moment with you. I think these two have more in common than we think.
oh, lend a mending hand (Caleb & Caduceus during Beau’s tombstone meditation in Episode 130)
I wrote this entire fic as an excuse for Caleb and Caduceus to hug and it does what it says on the tin. Got em.
it’s about the passing of measures (Beauyasha at the end of Episode 134, Aeor speculation)
This fic got extremely sidetracked because I rediscovered the marble machine during it and I do not apologize for that. I still really like the idea that Aeor as a whole, not just the Cognouza, is somewhat-alive. Too much magic and too much death for it to be anything else, in my mind. And I’m a sap for hurt/comfort.
the blumentrio playlist nobody asked for
If I think too much about how deep in each other these three people are I will cry. Made myself a soundtrack for those tears.
the caleb playlist nobody asked for
what if this angsty wizard had a playlist of songs that mostly just... make me want to dance? that question was answered here.
the caduceus playlist nobody asked for
songs about home, leaving home, dying, changing, becoming someone new, coming home and finding it’s changed... this to me is caduceus.
yeah... this campaign has been fun!! I probably won’t stop making things about it; I still write about Vox Machina, for crying out loud, but... it feels good to lay it all out like this. It’s been a long few years, and it’s wild to be seeing the end of it now.
#yes tumblr hates links yes here is an overlong post with 24 links#now THIS is why you make a blog. to look at your own work and say yeah several times.#critical role#i have some stuff i've been working on but i don't see any of it getting finished before the epilogue#looking back at everything is like... yeah! i had a lot of fun here!#anna's fic notes
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As expected, Dealing with intrusive thoughts is now one of my favorites
Here I come with almost all of my reactions on the episode, even though I tagged the spoiler warnings I put everything under the cut just in case. Enjoy the emotional rollercoaster while I'll probably go and rewatch it again.
Okay kinda expected one or two of the warnings but all of them together what is gonna happen???? (Though they make sense after reading the title)
HELLO FRESH BACK AGAIN
"I'm awesome and I can do this" there goes my boy. *said boy falls flat on the floor* ...come on
I felt that yawn bc I stayed up all night waiting for the video but it dropped at 8 am, I'm an idiot who should've gotten more sleep
"help me" why is he such a mood "everything is going wrong in my life" same but YOU SHOULDN'T SAY THAT LET ME HUG YOU
They're all sinking up so fast god I missed my bois. Also the general awkwardness of Virge and Pat, greeeeat something will go wrong
Virgil just ignoring everything and touching the railing, a mood
ALSO PLEASE LET ROMAN IN THE SITUATION
SECRET SECRETS ARE NO FUN TELL ME NOW OR ELSE WE'RE DONE
wait why does Ro want to be deeply troubled- man are you okay-
LOGAN'S HERE
"your most extreme reaction is an eyebrow raise" "FALSEHOOD" "I stand corrected" omfg
"what are you ta- what are you talking- what are you talking about?" I loved that whole take it made me feel complete
"Look I barely got any sleep" this can apply to a lot of us and I love just how we're all always like "TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF" but in the end this is where we all end up anyway
Okay I'm very curious about these troubling thoughts though
"so sushi" FUCCC I DIED RIGHT THERE
"Don't act like that was an accident" "everybody, Virgil. Let's give it up for the Purp Man" these speak for themselves. Also the purp man is my new fav nickname and I'm gonna use it.
4:17 Patton is adorable bye
"if you continue to push this we're going to end up in really dangerous territory" AND THAT'S WHERE THE TENSION STARTED TO BUILD UP
great flick
"am I delirious or is this the funniest video I've ever made" I felt that
YOU HIGH-JOCKED
okay but when Thomas starts disassociating I also feel really weird like as if there was something blocking my own hearing for real?? And not just the audio edited like that?? Maybe I'm just too tired
WHAT WHO WHHH first intrusive thought making its way what is gonna happen
OH MY GOD ROMAN WATCH OUT ALSO THAT'S DEFINITELY A NEW DARK SIDE OR SMTH LIKE THAT
W HO THE FUCKLKDSL IS THAT A MOUSTACHE IS THAT GLITTER WHAT IN THE WORLD IS HE WEARING WHAT IS HE DOING THERE PLEASE- okay but he looks crazy af I like that
"-evIL" "-SHOW UP"
First time I watched the scene where Ro gets knocked out I literally just screamed "ROMAN" in a high pitched sound I was shook wtf my bOY
Patton and Thomas's yells in unison plus "YOU KILLED HIM" I just I JUST
"Ah, he's the Duke" "....... boo" AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Okay but his voice is so on point with his character portrayal he's so weird it's awesome?
SONG SONG SONG and oh goodness the visuals I can't fathom how much editing work must have gone through this, they're all so talented.
"aunt patty naked" A G AI N??
"IM GONNA WHIP YOUR BUTT"
a snaKE IT'S DECEIT oh my these silouhettes are so great this is my favorite scene
this is gonna be stuck in my head all day
THE COOL MIRROR EDIT.
god i hate him so much already but i'm super intrigued he's so chaotic the whole team made a wonderful job i'll never stop saying this
"i'm really stupid right now" just how much out of context relatable content are we going to get on this fine day?
omg the dark version of creativity, which can be associated with intrusive thoughts, that's very clever
THE JUICY STUFF DANCE
"Repression can be very bad indeed" I mean he's right tbh it leads to never solving the problem at all
GO LOGAN GO HAVE YOUR TIME TO SHINE FINALLY i missed him
"i can't hear youuuuuu" much like "I don't understand what you're saying I don't know anything about words" THE DARK SIDES ARE ALL SASSY LITTLE BITCHES
pattonnnn did a real good job
THE BRAVE HANDSOME UNBEATABLE ROMAN and mashed potatoes
"scary" and Virgil just gives Thomas a look idk I live on the little details (Im ten minutes into the vid and look how long this post already is)
GEE Remus (already using his name bc it's shorter) looking so offended at the label and then pointing out it should be a Virgil problem whAT DOES THIS MEAN IM SHAKING
WHY WOULD HE BE DECEIT AGAIN IM DYING. "Idk if you guys can tell but I'm a little silly"
"then why are you lying" no everybody I don't need angst
THE BLACK AND THE WHITE THEORY I SAW GOING AROUND good job to whoever thought of that
JOAN
the forbidden dance
INTO A BUTTHOLE WHAT IS IT WITH HIM AND BUTTHOLES
there u go thomas said it too
haters gonna hate hate hate hate hate FHDSLAKLFD
irresponsible parenting, Logan completing the parental unit of the sides
"maybe there's hope for you after all!" me looking at all my wips
REMUS' LAUGH IS PERFECT. also "BITCH WHAT IS *YOUR* DEAL"
"you've never been one to soften the truth" OH BOI HERE WE GO
"do we have some case of brain swap???" I legitly said "maybe" in unison with Patton the first time
Vee pls stop putting Thommy boy down he's having a bad time
Logan trying to put some sense into the situation is my only spark of hope for this to turn back good
REMUS IS SO DRAMATIC
That lick was ....... let's pretend it never happened
"you know who can help us with that???" DECEIT'S SONG COMING UP that was great, imagine the chaos that the duo would create
"THATS WHAT REPRESSION IS?"
gasp Remus trying to make Virgil angry at Logan shall not stand DON'T PUT THEM AGAINST ONE ANOTHER HE'S JUST TRYING TO HELP
"you all are not listening to Thomas" this is the development I needed
"you're just para-" and he cuts himself. You all know what I'm talking about. Foreshadowing probably? This happened too back then when Roman was almost calling him the same. And then Virge looks so hurt I- "thank you for being on guard" that made me want to cry idk
the whole speech Logan gave? Pure gold. That was perfect.
HE SAID FIGURATIVELY *CLAP CLAP CLAP*
"UH RECORD SCRATCH?"
"does this make me cool?" djslagrkglhf also the teeth thing right after what the
... the deodorant eating ...
DUKEY
The first time I watched I thought his name was spelled Remis that's how dumb my Italian ass is
Still I love his name bc I'm a nerd for ancient culture, ESPECIALLY Roman (and ancient Greek but it isn't mentioned here) and I love the little thing they did with both Creativity names, super clever and very much liked on my part.
"I would never hide anything from you" and he looks at Virgil JUST ALL THIS FORESHADOWING
LOGAN SHOWING HIS TEETH BACK UP
"how about you shut up" Roman what the hecc man
THAT THING INTO LOGANS HEAD UNSETTLED ME A BIT
what are they doing to him today let him rest
double blow
"can we logic our way out of that?" everybody nodding was so pure
"shit"
THAT FUCKING JUMPSCARE I'M SORRY WHAT THE FU
"not all thoughts are meaningful"
He's go- no he's back again
THE CALLBACK MENTION AND PATTONS REACTION... probable foreshadowing to what Joan said about there being a part two of SvS?
"When are you actually gonna jump out of a moving car I've been bringing it up for years" so it's not just me..?
"it is okay if the thought happens to cross your mind"
"everything is okay" I'm going to cry I needed that
I love how Logan touches the topic that there is no problem in seeking help from therapists. There's a lot to say on this, but I was really glad that was pointed out since the are a lot of stereotypes on the matter
why did Virgil look like he was about to cry
Patton I love you
Thomas going to rest is what everyone wanted to see
Virgil confronting Remus I'm living you're doing amazing sweetie
"you tickle me emo"
"it was just like old times" then Pat and Lo's looks in this essay I will
ROMAAAAN
VIRGILS SMILE
"YOU'RE ALIVE"
"I LOVE YOU" ME TOO!! ME TOO ME TOO
"are you good?" "are you hurt at all?" I love when the sides look out for each other
"I'm sorry Logan" right through the heart. Another development.
I need y'all to look at Virgil in this exact second because. he.
that's my point.
All those smiles while Logan's talking are making me alive
"No seriously, you're ... really ... cool" I started tearing up right here. Twice. And then Logan sinks down cause he's not at all used to this and he's feeling t h i n g s please keep on being appreciated you deserve it
Also Patton always learning from his mistakes and understanding them when he does something wrong or he thinks in the wrong direction, that's something I think a lot of people need to learn, including myself. Like, it's okay to be wrong and make mistakes, just do your best to make sure you're improving yourself afterwards, instead of dwelling on it too much
"I don't like him" makes two of us
"Soooo you have a brother?" oh boy
The m i r r o r it's making me cry
"He's gone now and he's never coming back!" "I don't think that's-" "BYEE" what was all that talk about repression for if you contiNUE TO DO THIS ROMAN please I beg of you let us hELP YOU he's making me die inside
Oh boi the big moment. I already expected a bomb to drop since Virgil was the last one remaining.
"You okay buddy?" "Huh?" op somehow was already found crying
"I'm a little disappointed in myself" istg all that foreshadowing mixed with me wanting to hug him
The music picking up tension, this is poetic cinema let me tell you
I noticed how he calls them "the others", all these tiny details is what I'm living for
"I should know better" I couldn't beLIEVE IT, also how he seemed to be so frustrated made something inside me break
the pause and then "Because I was one of them", the music stops for a second, a little second in which you can hear my distant screaming "GOSH HE SAID IT IT WAS TRUE"
Thomas is speechless and just stares at him while the music picks up again and then Virgil's sigh and expression sinking down like "there you have it. that's the truth. and you can't do anything about it" he looks so defeated I'm breaking down.
Did I already mention poetic cinema? I just love angst and this scene was perfect
First time watching I, too, barely understood anything I was listening to in the last parte because all of that was really a lot to take in.
"Those thoughts that you may have thought do not define you"
"[the thought] may simply be that we are really okay"
"Go to bed!" me
no im not in the mood for food because for some unfathomable reason I had anxiety before the video dropped yay me
WHY ARE U DRINKING RED WINE WITH THAT DISH
GAVIN BEST BOY EVER
and last but not least: are you fucking serious Remus
THERE'S A SNAKE IN MY BUTT FANDFKJL
I didn't expect this topic at all and I am so glad it was talked about, thankfully my intrusive thoughts do not bother me as much as I realized other people's do. And I never saw anyone talking about this before, which is why it makes this video so important. I saw a tweet recently about someone saying that it is okay if you think about weird things, the important is that you never act on them, that's what makes you a good person. But I think this video really explains it far better and I never realized how common something like this was? So yeah another time in which I've been educated and couldn't be happier about it. These people really are bringing light to the world gah I LOVE THEM.
oKAY guess I'm done this was a wild ride and yeah I tend to point out EVERYTHING, so here you have it, as I already mentioned if you feel the need to geek out too, I'm here for ANYBODY! (pls I have no friends)
#ts spoiler#thomas sanders#sanders sides#sanders sides spoilers#roman sanders#remus sanders#logan sanders#virgil sanders#patton sanders#deceit sanders#ts roman#ts logan#ts remus#ts virgil#ts patton#ts deceit#deceit mention#swearing#tw swearing#dealing with intrusive thoughts#spoilers
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