#dnd pc: bardrynn

[shiieldmaiden]

Y’all I never post my own shit on this blog but this is Important

i’ve got an amazing dnd group and because we’re Super Invested a bunch of us made playlists for our characters

feat. a Very Long playlist write-up under the cut 💫

The Adventure Zone: Amnesty Theme by Griffin McElroy

This is the true start to this playlist, even though it’s not on Spotify. I had to start off with something from my Good Good McElboys. I imagine Bardrynn’s hometown of Quarrycrest as something of a fantasy Appalachia, all beautiful smoky mountains and close-knit families and communities living and working together. Everyone knew everyone and everyone helped everyone. What better way to set that scene than the Amnesty theme?

Woman by Kesha

Bardrynn is so. goddamn. independent. She’s impatient, she’s impulsive, and she’s not one to let just anyone tell her what to do. She’s a motherfuckin woman and this song captures her attitude, especially before she got more familiar with the darker parts of the world. She takes responsibility for herself, does things for herself, and doesn’t like asking for help. She’s got this.

Mess is Mine by Vance Joy

That being said, she’s a fiercely loyal friend. Bardrynn is a Gryffindor through and through and she will do anything for her friends. Well hold on, my darling. This mess was yours, now your mess is mine. She is someone who will shoulder her friends’ troubles without a second thought. You know you gave me all your time, but did I give enough of mine? Even though she gives so much to her friends, she still worries that it might not be enough. She wants to be enough for her friends, to be there whenever they need her, whatever they need her for. If she can’t be there for her friends, what good is she to them?

Mountain Sound by Of Monsters and Men

No matter how far she travels, Bardrynn’s heart lies in the mountains. She knows that whatever happens, she has the mountains to go home to. And as brave as she is, she’d be lying if she said she’d never considered running away from her problems and running home to those mountains. Heard them calling in the distance, so I packed my things and ran.

Map of the World by Monsters of Folk

She may be a small town girl, but Bardrynn has a streak of wanderlust to her. She wants to see the world, she wants to explore, she wants to see and experience new things. That far-off feeling, that up-close kind of ache - she tries to fight it, she denies it like hell, but Bardrynn is homesick. She has been for awhile, but she’s just ignored it. Having friends helps. Exploring new things and going on exciting quests helps. She’s doing what she wanted, she’s doing good and seeing the world, so why isn’t she happier?

Here Comes the Sun by the Beatles

A little self-explanatory, your girl tries to keep a positive outlook. She knows she’s not the brightest and doesn’t always notice things, but one thing she does notice is that if she keeps up a positive attitude, the people around her tend to perk up too. And I say “It’s alright”

Ain’t No Mountain High Enough by Marvin Gaye and Tammi Terrell

Wow, is that Bardrynn’s Saving People Thing I see?? Holy cow, that’s Bardrynn’s Saving People Thing I see!! I told you you could always count on me darlin’. From that day on, I made a vow - I’ll be there when you want me some way somehow. Bardrynn will do absolutely anything for her friends - from taking the blame for ruining the publicity campaign in Dragon’s Brawl and getting herself fired so that Mori could keep her job to throwing herself into harm’s way to protect her party members. She’ll move heaven and earth to help her friends, drop anything to go to their side, hell she’ll take a killing blow if it means her friend will live.

Maps for the Getaway by Andrew McMahon In The Wilderness

Leaving home to go fight for Dragon’s Brawl was hard. It was really fucking hard. For all her life, Bardrynn had lived in Quarrycrest. Her family lived in Quarrycrest. Her ancestors were buried in Quarrycrest up in the family plot at the top of the Oakburn holler. (If she has anything to say about it, she’ll be buried there too, when her time comes) No cash in the bank, no paid holidays, all we have - all we have is gas in the tank, maps for the getaway. She had a dream and a plan and a metric ton of uncertainty, but she did it anyway and she was so proud of herself when she was able to write home to tell her family that she had done it. She was a professional fighter.

The Boxer by Paul Simon (Mumford & Sons cover)

When I left my home and my family, I was no more than a boy. In the company of strangers, in the quiet of the railway stations, running scared. The mood of this song, the story of a fighter doing what they love in the ring and then struggling with loneliness outside of it is just - it’s so perfect. It took Bardrynn awhile to regain her footing with her new job away from home. Even with Mori there, it wasn’t the same as being able to just walk down the holler a bit to say hello to her brother or strolling into town and saying hello to everyone she passed on the way. Plus, Mumford’s sound is so Appalachia to me, it suits Bardrynn really fucking well, all strings, bluegrass rhythms, and tight harmonies.

In the clearing stands a boxer and a fighter by his trade, and he carries the reminder of every glove that laid him down and cut him til he cried out in his anger and his shame “I am leaving, I am leaving,” but the fighter still remains.

Applause by Lady Gaga

Once she got her footing though, once Bardrynn got comfortable, she was fucking ecstatic with her life. She practically got high off of the crowds and their reactions to her, their applause and their cheers. Nothing could bring her down when a stadium of fans were cheering her name. I live for the applause

Jenny by the Studio Killers

OOF. Bardrynn’s bad at feelings. She didn’t plan on catching feelings for Mori. She really didn’t. She didn’t even realize it was happening at first, she’s terrible at reading feelings from anyone, including herself. She was her best friend! She couldn’t feel like this about her, she was just a really close friend! Jenny darlin’, you’re my best friend, but there’s a few things that you don’t know… Once she figured it out (it took her an embarrassingly long time, looking back), she tried to just shove it down, ignore it. Telling her would just ruin things. They had a good thing going, the two of them being best friends in and out of the ring. That was, until their bosses decided they needed to stage a rivalry between them.

Little Lion Man by Mumford & Sons

Bardrynn carries a lot of guilt over fucking up that fake rivalry. It was just one slip-up, they’d been doing so well. But Mori had made a really funny joke and Bardrynn couldn’t help but laugh and someone had to go and catch her looking at her like that… and the next thing they knew, the two of them were being threatened with losing their jobs over the way they handled that “publicity strategy,” or whatever the fuck the boss had called it.

So Bardrynn took the blame.

She couldn’t let Mori get fired too. But it was not your fault but mine. And it was your heart on the line. I really fucked it up this time, didn’t I my dear? It was her fault, not Mori’s. Only one of them should lose their job over this and if someone had to take the fall for it, it was going to be Bardrynn. Mori tried to argue when Bardrynn told their boss that it was her fault, but she wouldn’t hear any of it. Bardrynn couldn’t fix the damage she’d done to Mori’s image as a fighter, she couldn’t fix any dips in popularity her fights might suffer, but she could make sure she kept her job.

And now, she’s terrified of letting her friends down. She doesn’t want to fail them like she did Mori. She can’t let that happen. Let’s be real, Bardrynn would die for her friends or her family without a second thought.

Bastards by Kesha

After her fallout with Dragon’s Brawl, there were a lot of people who started bad-mouthing Bardrynn. People who accused her of ruining the Dragon’s Brawl story because she couldn’t just play along, people who were disappointed in her for failing at this, people who were angry with her for messing up this or that. Been underestimated my entire life. I know people gonna talk shit, and darlin’ that’s fine. But they won’t break my spirit, I won’t let ‘em win. I’ll just keep on livin, keep on livin’ the way I wanna live. It was hard, really fucking hard to brush it off, but Bardrynn did her best to not let it bother her. She’s gotten better at it. She’s gotten a lot better at it. It’s still hard sometimes, and she still feels guilty sometimes when she braids that bright blue ribbon from a fan into her hair, but she’s getting better at tieing those reminders to the good memories rather than the bad ones.

Heaven When We’re Home by The Wailin’ Jennys

Been a fool, I’ve been cruel to myself. Been hangin’ on to nothin’ when nothin’ could be worse than hangin on. And somethin’ tells me, there must be something better than all this … And it’s a long and rugged road, and we don’t know where it’s headed. But we know it’s gonna get us where we’re goin’. And when we find what we’re lookin’ for, we’ll drop these bags and search no more, cuz it’s gonna feel like heaven when we’re home. I’m tempted to just leave it with those lyrics, but tbh, they’re very true to her attitude going forward from Dragon’s Brawl. She wandered, she didn’t know where she was headed, but she trusted that she’d figure it out eventually. So far it’s worked out alright. Plus, the Wailin’ Jennys’ sound is just So Perfectly Bardrynn. I also love the harmonies in the chorus, kinda shows, at least to me, how important having people around her is to Bardrynn. And maybe I’ll walk awhile and feel the earth beneath me. They say if you start lookin’, it doesn’t matter if you find it. And who’s to say that even if I did, it’s what I’m really looking for?

Below My Feet by Mumford & Sons

Keep the earth below my feet. From my sweat, my blood runs weak. Let me learn from where I have been. Keep my eyes to serve, my hands to learn. As she started traveling the world and exploring, Bardrynn started to see things in terms of what she could do - what she could do for other people besides just the ones she holds nearest and dearest. She started helping people. She started looking for people to help, jobs to take, towns to protect. Anything she could do to make herself useful, to find some kind of purpose beyond just wandering aimlessly, unemployed and technically homeless. She found that helping people was really fulfilling. She liked it. She was good at it. And it made other people happy, it made other people safe.

We’re Going to Be Friends by The White Stripes

Bardrynn makes friends super goddamn fast. She’s a friendly and outgoing woman, and while she may not be good at telling if someone is lying, she believes that she has a good sense of when someone is going to be a friend. To be fair, she tends to go by the philosophy of friend until proven not friend, but still. She could tell within ten minutes of meeting the party that this was going to be a good thing. They were going to be friends and it was going to be so much goddamn fun. And when I wake, tomorrow I’ll bet that you and I will walk together again. I can tell that we are gonna be friends.

I Wanna Be Your Girlfriend by girl in red

Now, Bardrynn has a wisdom of 9. She’s terrible at recognizing other people’s feelings and even worse at diagnosing her own feelings. This has happened to her before, with Mori. She got confused, she was certain that the feelings she had towards Mori were just that of a best friend. 

She would’ve been this freaked out if anyone in the party died, right? Sure, she’s been worried about Liana and keeping an eye on her in battle since she died and came back to life, and she might feel a little more protective of her lately, but it’d be the same for anyone else in the party if they died, right?

Right?

Beautiful Dawn by The Wailin’ Jennys

I feel like this rounds her out nicely. Bardrynn is trying to get better. She’s trying to improve herself, to grow, to become the friend her friends need her to be. She’s trying to become the woman she wants to be, more than just a brokenhearted has-been fighter - a woman who doesn’t let down her loved ones, a woman who protects those she cares about, a woman who defends those who can’t defend themselves, a woman who can do some good in the world. Take me to a place where I feel no shame, take me where courage doesn’t need a name. Learning how to cry is the hardest part, and there’s only one way to mend a broken heart.

Dang, this is a long post.