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fangweaver2099 · 7 months ago

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𝐅 𝐀 𝐖 𝐍 𝐓 𝐄 𝐄 𝐓 𝐇 - Prologue pt 3

MINORS DNI 18+ FIC

You’ve always liked the idea of having a dominant partner - BDSM was something you’ve read about, watched videos about.

Something you made Pinterest boards and aesthetic tumblr posts about when you were 18 and curious, the idea always sounded nice, but you’ve never done it in practice, not really. Sure you bought fuzzy handcuffs at a gag gift store once, but that didn’t really count.

You’re still a virgin.

You’ve always had that chronically awkward, workaholic type of vibe that made typical dating near impossible at worst and frustrating at best. Normal dating apps have proven fruitless and agitating. So poor curious little you talked yourself into making a fetlife account. You weren’t looking for true love, but at least you could get laid.

DM Request from: 10:13 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Hello, Fawn.”

College was for new experiences after all.

CW: BDSM heavy/centric fic. Safe, Sane & Consensual. Miguel is your professor, but you both don't know that. Age Gap (Y/N is 23, Miguel is mid 30's)

TAG: @slut4oscarissac23 @iamtheprincess227 @haveclayeveryday @sphynxfoxslut69 @junehasnotbeenfound

PART 1 - PART 2 - CHAPTER 1

It had been almost two months since Web first messaged you. As it turned out, you liked not being the caretaker for once. Considering you grew up the eldest of your six siblings, you were the second mom, the babysitter, the caretaker .

Being the eldest daughter was a curse.

You still had embarrassing flashbacks while laying in your bed of your father screaming at you over getting a B in AP physics in your junior year of highschool.

You liked not being in charge. No responsibility, no obligation, no pressure. Web gave that to you.

He’d become a friend as much as he was a dominant. You found yourself asking him about mundane things, restaurants he liked or opinions on your going-out clothing.

He never really broke character, or, well - what you assumed was a character. Suave, domineering with a hint of playful possessiveness... you weren’t entirely sure if you were ready to sacrifice as much clothing as he wanted to rip off you.

Clothes were expensive and you worked too hard to let him rip apart your nice lingerie.

Still, you weren't entirely opposed to the idea of him tearing apart clothes that he bought you. You thought about suggesting it once, but chickened out as he'd already spent a decent amount on you. Asking for more felt selfish, and you would not reduce yourself to being anyone's sugar baby.

(Even if the thought did tempt you, sometimes.)

He had plans for you - or so he said. You got the hint that he enjoyed that you were new and that he was the one ‘teaching you the ropes’, but he took it seriously. He made you buy an ebook and learn about your nerves and blood flow.

He didn’t want you to risk nerve damage and went out of his way to ensure you knew to see the signs.

You had even suggested buying your own rope and testing some self ties, but Web refused. Worried that you’d mess something up and end up losing a limb, he expressly forbade any experimentation that you’d otherwise have tried.

He hadn’t really revealed much of himself other than he traveled occasionally for work. You had about a dozen different photos in your telegram media chat of him in different hotel bedrooms, but he never told you why he was traveling - just that he was.

You still hadn’t gotten an answer out of him of what he did for work. He was more active when he was traveling - during the week he practically disappeared but when he was traveling, you’d get a good extra half an hour or so to chat with him. You got used to the routine and you may or may not have adjusted your sleep schedule to spend the most time with him.

Your roommates were beginning to notice, though. It was obvious, with how you started taking much better care of yourself. You dressed up more - did your makeup regularly, you always walked to work…

You began cooking, for god’s sake, breaking out your grandmother’s precious recipes and putting them to use.

You tried to not think about the improvement of your mental health hinged on a 36 year old man bossing you around and making you fuck yourself silly on a toy he bought you.

Aurora had dubbed you ‘Dorm Mom’ despite the fact that the five of you didn’t live in a dorm. Technically your house was a duplex that was converted to one house for college student rentals.

He hasn’t asked you to use the lovense yet. It was pink and had a weird wider clamp bit you assumed held it in place. You hadn’t tried to put it on, remembering Web’s words.

“No using them without my permission, understood?”

So, obviously, you didn’t. You didn’t expect yourself to be so rule compliant - you’d convinced yourself you’d be a brat or sassy like a kitten. Now you just fantasized about sitting between Web’s legs as he called you a good pet.

You still hadn’t decided what you were - dog, kitten, bunny? No clue - so he just started calling you pet. It was kind of hard to roleplay being nonverbal online. You had sent him a few videos now - happy to take it nice and slow.

He made it clear he was comfortable with that. He was always direct and clear with you. You found yourself adoring his communication skills and learning a thing or two. It was refreshing compared to your singular previous relationship - he… he was sure a teenager.

Clear commands were comforting in an odd way, even if said commands were some of the filthiest things you've ever had sent to you. The commands he gave were easy to understand and impossible to fuck up without distinctly trying.

He made you nervous, but that was from anticipation, not from anxiety of making yourself look like a total idiot.

He'd scold you and punish you if you'd call yourself that anyways, and your hand still hurt from the first round of lines he'd made you write in a notebook he also made you go out and get. Punishments long distance were difficult, but that was a surefire way you wouldn't forget his instructions and rules anytime soon.

It was a Thursday night - Web had told you he’d be around at 9pm, so you’d been twiddling your thumbs agonizing over the wait as you stared at the clock. There were a hundred things you could be doing to pass the time, but none of them seemed particularly fun against the rising concoction of excitement and dread churning in your belly. Instead, you figured you’d clean your room - the stage in which you’d male your grand debut.

It was hardly the first time he had seen you, of course, but it would be the first time he’d see you live. You remembered how the first video you sent accidentally included the messy pile of clothes in the corner of your bedroom that you had forgotten about for an embarrassingly long time. He must have thought you a slob. You nearly cried a day after sending it when you scrolled through your conversation and saw it in the thumbnail.

Not again. No, your room would be fucking spotless , if you had anything to say about it.

First thing first, the hamper. Heaving the pile into your lattice-work bin, you trucked it over to the laundry room, the half-faded writing on its handle reading your name to make sure no one accidentally swapped clothes.

Next thing was vacuuming, and not just turning on the communal roomba and letting it wander for a few minutes in your room like the last time you ‘cleaned’. Your eyes lingered on the pink disc affectionately dubbed ‘Kirby’ by the household. Not this time, old friend.

You were a mostly clean person. Mostly. Maybe it was time to get back on your anti-depressants, you mused, picking up another glass to bring to the kitchen.

After a half hour you felt pretty satisfied, your room looking better than it had in… Probably since a week after you moved in. Maybe you were messy?

The thought was interrupted by the click of a door closing in the living room. You winced. No, this could not be happening. They were - were supposed to be out tonight! Didn’t they all have a show to be at?

You peeked your head out your door to spy who had come in, feeling a tad like a ninja without the skills or cool costume or, really, anything that would make you a ninja.

It was Aurora - huffing as she made her way inside. As always, the strawberry blonde had that characteristic coloring, all colorful care-bear themed clothing and highwaisted jeans, a literal rainbow shaped into a person and set loose to run wild. She was scowling, but that quickly evaporated when her brown eyes met yours.

“Looks like you’re stuck with me tonight. The drag show ended early because one of the Queens made one too many jokes about cops and I guess some guy had a brother that was one.” She rolled her eyes, “‘Throwing bricks is assault’, he said. ‘Yeah that’s the point’, the Queen replied. You know how it is.��

“The others are bar hopping, but I have a doctor’s appointment in the morning so I have to turn in soon. Don’t mind me if you uh.. Had something special planned with all of us out, wink wink,” she said while literally winking. You wished you exploded on the spot.

“S-Something special? No-no, why would you think that?” you stammered, stepping out from your bedroom, hands growing clammy and wet.

“Because it's not often you have the apartment to yourself. You don’t maybe.. Have a boyfriend coming over or something?” She leaned forward, lips curling into a grin as she leaned closer.

“ NO, ” you replied firmly, definitely too firm. It wasn’t a lie, he wasn’t exactly a boyfriend and he wasn’t coming over either.

You were just going to get naked in front of him on camera and masturbate.

Now you just had to do that with your roommate a few doors down.

This was fine.

Everything was fine.

(everything was definitely not fine, and you could feel yourself getting paler, a bit lightheaded.)

“Suuuuure you don’t. If I hear knocking on the door - or in your room - I’ll just turn up my laptop while I watch netflix.” She hummed to herself, waltzing over to the fridge to grab a snack before she disappeared into her equally brightly colored bedroom.

This… complicated things, but of all the people to be home while this happened, you supposed Aurora was the least bad. She was a heavy sleeper and she wore earbuds when she watched stuff in her room, so it was possible that she wouldn’t notice at all.

Your eyes darted to the clock as she left, checking the time. It was past time. You had been so busy worrying that you -

Shit.

Rushing back to your bedroom, you snagged a towel on the way there, spreading it on the floor as you moved in. There was a risk of you needing it later, and you really,��really wanted to be prepared.

Taking a deep breath, you settled, laptop in hand, sitting cross legged on the towel. You opened your laptop, setting it down in front of you and taking a big, deep breath, losing any of the composure you’d gained all at once as you saw the notification waiting.

9:10 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Are you free, pet?”

“ I am. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:18 PM

9:19 PM - WebRigger2099 - “I’ve been thinking about the video you sent me a few days ago.”

“ Oh? I just did what you asked, Sir. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:19 PM

9:19 PM - WebRigger2099 - “That you did, and you looked so nice squirming with those clamps on. You have very beautiful breasts, Fawn. Are you enjoying all the toys I provided you? Which is your favorite?”

“ Thank you. I am, but I don’t think I have a favorite yet. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:19 PM

9:19 PM - WebRigger2099 - “How are you adjusting to the dildo? Can you take it completely to the flare yet?”

“ Same as last photo I shared, so not quite. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:19 PM

9:20 PM - WebRigger2099 - “As much as I’d like to hilt myself in you when we meet, I understand that’s not always realistic. Don’t feel too bad if you reach your limit. If you do, however, I’ll need to get you something bigger to practice on.”

“ I’m happy to keep trying with encouragement. :p ” - Fawnteeth - 9:20 PM

9:20 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Aside from praise, is there something I can offer as a reward?”

“ Pics, maybe. I do quite like the praise. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:20 PM

9:20 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Alright, how about this: You get a picture for every inch you can manage starting at four. That’s twp potential pictures total if you reach all six.”

“ I like that. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:20 PM

9:20 PM - WebRigger2099 - “How would you like to show me your progress live?”

“ I can try another video, I wish we could just facetime or something. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:20 PM

9:20 PM - WebRigger2099 - “That’s what I wanted to talk to you about tonight, actually.”

“ Oh? ” - Fawnteeth - 9:20 PM

9:20 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Zoom. I will be muted and you still won’t see my face.”

“ Can I ask why? ” - Fawnteeth - 9:20 PM

9:21 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Why do you wear your mask?”

“ Because I’m a college aged woman posting nudes on the internet. Point taken, I guess. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:21 PM

9:21 PM - WebRigger2099 - “We all have our reasons. Would you like to or not?”

“ Yes, sir. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:21 PM

9:21 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Good girl. Always so polite.”

“ I try. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:21 PM

9:21 PM - WebRigger2099 - “It saves me some time disciplining it into you.”

“ We’ll see, I like the idea of being a brat, remember? Just hard to do across the web. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:22 PM

9:22 PM - WebRigger2099 - “I’ll try not to scare you too much the first time I show you the crop then.”

“ So scary :p. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:22 PM

9:22 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Let’s see what you think when you’re crying and you can’t sit for the next three days.”

“ We’ll just have to see. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:22 PM

9:26 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Get your lube, lovense and dildo. Find somewhere comfortable where you won’t be interrupted. Join when you’re ready: [Zoom code]”

“ Okay, can you see me?. ” - Fawnteeth - 9:30 PM

9:30 PM - WebRigger2099 - “There’s my pet. Yes, I see you beautiful.”

Web’s video flashed on, bare enough to give you a generous view of his muscular frame, sculpted torso painting him like some god in human form. A pair of gray boxer-briefs were all that he wore on his bottom half, the bulge of his flaccid penis intimidatingly large. The man was a shower, not a grower. Even soft as it was now, it strained against the fabric and ran down his leg, head nearly threatening to peek out from the leg-holes.

It was unfair how hot he was.

As always, the frame cut off before you could see his chin. Just what could a man like this have to hide, truly? So mysterious.

You found yourself staring for a moment, hunched over in your baggy t-shirt and underwear. All the confidence evaporated from your body - you didn’t realize he would have his feed on.

You swallowed, your throat suddenly dry, struggling with the camera of your laptop.

“Can you hear me?” you asked.

The man leaned forward, the barest hint of his chin coming into frame only to be obscured by a simple medical mask. His long fingers typed something out and a moment later his message pinged into existence.

9:30 PM - WebRigger2099 - “I can.”

Your eyes rested firmly on the mask for a moment, your brow raised.

“Same idea, but mine is easier to breathe in.” You pointed at your own mask, black cloth and far more comfortable.

It was technically made to be worn over a medical mask, after all. You were trying so hard to play it cool, as if you couldn’t feel sweat sticking your hair to the back of your neck. You sit up and back far enough you’re in view of the camera but you can still see his text.

9:30 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Here I thought you might ask me where I got the idea from. I hope you don’t have a copyright.”

You grinned under your mask, eyes scrunching. “I don’t. I-I’m glad you got the idea from me.” Flinching at the stutter, you glanced around the room, one of your hands brushing over your mask and down your neck awkwardly.

9:31 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Nervous, Fawn? It’s normal to be. This is your first time doing something like this, isn’t it?”

Sat there, you stalled, before nodding as physically hard as you could - you didn’t want to stutter again. Your hands eventually grabbed at the edge of your shirt and twisted it together, revealing a hint of your stomach.

9:31 PM - WebRigger2099 - “We can go slow, pet. Remember our safety tools. Shall we test them?”

“I- yeah. Sorry. I want to. Just… It feels more real, ” you admitted.

9:32 PM - WebRigger2099 - “This will make it easier when I meet you in person. A stepping stone. I want you to feel comfortable. Safe.”

You know he couldn’t see you blush, but you sure felt your face warm, your eyes drifting over his hands as they disappeared to type.

“I know. I trust you,” you finally spoke, voice a bit more sure.

9:32 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Color check. How are you feeling?”

“Green,” you answered, hands moving to finally wrench your top over your body, tossing it… somewhere.

Idly, your gaze brushed over your hips, fingers touching the half-faded marks that you had written on yourself the week before at Web’s instruction.

9:32 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Still not fully faded, I see. Good thing it was a compliment and not something else.”

“What would something else be?” you asked, again cringing at your stumbling of words.

9:32 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Some pets prefer degradation. ‘Whore’, ‘Slut’, ‘Stupid Bitch’. You seem like the type that works on praise.”

Your brows furrowed, “What do you prefer?”

Belatedly, you realized that it was probably a terrible idea to ask. You knew you’d try desperately to enjoy whatever he liked.

9:32 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Depends on my mood, and how bratty they’ve been. You’re a good girl, aren’t you Fawn? Stay like that and we’ll keep doing praise.”

Slowly, Web reached down to his thigh, thick-veined hand sliding across the bulge of his member which had slowly begun to swell and harden.

9:32 PM - WebRigger2099 - “You’ve barely done anything and you’ve already started to get me hard. Your voice is beautiful, Fawn.”

You swore you felt your heart skip in your chest, shifting on your knees almost uncomfortably. You felt the urge to sit up straighter - it was hard to tell if it was to hide the rolls on your stomach or because you felt lifted by his compliment.

He was almost inhumanly attractive. You swore a man like him couldn’t be real, but here he was.

“I.. Uhm…,” you stumbled over your words, glancing at the toy laid out beside your hip.

9:32 PM - WebRigger2099 - “How about you start taking off the rest of your clothes for me, Fawn? Show me your beautiful body.”

Web’s hand shifted, fingers hooking the edge of his underwear and dragging it down enough that you could begin to see the neatly trimmed bush of pubic hair leading to his manhood. It lingered there, just an inch away from revealing the base of his cock to you.

In all honesty, how wet you already were was more than enough humiliation alone for you to squirm - he didn’t need to contribute. You reached your arms back, struggling for a moment to unclasp your bra. It was on instinct as you tossed it down and wrapped one hand over your breasts.

You tried to not notice him typing one-handed, knowing it would be like that for the rest of the night.

9:33 PM - WebRigger2099 - “There they are, those pretty breasts of yours. Don’t hide them from me, pet.”

“I’m trying ,” you admitted, squirming in your kneeling position. You were hunching forward ever so slightly, eyes waiting for his next message.

9:33 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Color?”

“Green,” you mumbled, forcing yourself to drop your arm and sink your fingers into your thigh.

Part of you was thankful the AC in your room barely worked so it wasn’t freezing to be naked right now.

Taking the initiative for the first time in weeks, you shifted, sitting back on your haunches to display the wet spot quickly spreading across the seat of your panties.

9:33 PM - WebRigger2099 - “So wet for me already, eager little thing. Take those off too; Show me your pussy, Fawn.”

You tried… so hard to do it quickly - sexy, y’ know? Smooth. Hooking your thumbs under the waistband and tugging, just like he had, but…

Instead of a smooth descent, your underwear caught at your knees, and you froze, shifting back on your hips to try to dislodge them, but that only had you falling quickly off balance. It took both arms to catch yourself and keep you from toppling over, panties still tangled at your knees, and you whimpered, trying desperately not to look at your screen while you smoothly (read: jerkily) kicked your underwear off.

Now nude, you had to take a moment to soothe your panic. You were convinced that, to some extent, he was charmed by your awkwardness - he'd all but told you as much a few times, but it didn't stop your cheeks from burning and your mind from considering hanging up, giving up, and hiding away from the rest of the world for the next year or so.

For a moment you lingered half-laid before rolling back onto your knees, now completely nude. Eager to pretend that nothing happened, you raked your hair from your face, risking a quick glance to the screen, and -

You swore you could see his chest rise like he was chuckling at you. It was almost enough to make you wish he could see you pout.

Crossing your arms, you frowned, all too cognizant of how the motion propped up your breasts for him while he typed.

9:33 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Good girl. Take those tits in your hands now, squeeze them. Pinch your nipples for me. Do what you would want me to do to them. Color.”

“G-green,” you managed to get out, wiping your sweaty palms over your torso. Taking a deep breath, you reread the order, before letting your eyes drift back up to his video. Watching the broad, built man palm his crotch, squeezing his massive cock through his pants,you couldn’t help but remember that the black dildo was two inches shorter and more than a bit thinner.

He was massive.

Slowly, your hands uncrossed and cupped your breasts. Hesitantly, you tweaked at one of your nipples, cautious and careful. You had always been sensitive, it was hard to even sleep without a bra much less masturbate. Now Web was telling you to… oh dear. Your eyes pinched close, thumb and pointer coming together to squeeze the sensitive bundle of nerves between them.

You massaged it gently as you felt electricity run up your spine, forcing a little gasp from your throat. You straightened your back, tensing and releasing the nipple with a whimper. Your fingers lingered again, knowing every touch would jolt through you like lightning.

9:34 PM - WebRigger2099 - “You seem hesitant. Color.”

Taking in a sharp breath, you swallowed, glancing between the chat and the camera. It took effort to maintain ‘eye contact’, but you forced yourself to do it, to open your mouth and answer him.

“G-green.”

A pause, and then-

“‘M sensitive ,” you managed to mumble, twisting your head away from the camera.

9:34 PM - WebRigger2099 - “So it seems. Do you have the clamps I bought you nearby? Maybe it will be easier hands-free.”

You glanced back, leaning forward to read his words. On instinct - you went to type your reply, only stopping yourself at the last second

“I- yeah. I think so,” you shift on your knees and grab one of the ‘secret’ boxes from under your bed where the dildo and lube was stored. Your hips were the only thing in view to Web.

When she turned around with the clamps in hand a new message awaited her.

9:34 PM - WebRigger2099 - “So pretty. Turn around for me first, let me see your ass. Spread your cheeks and show me your pussy.”

Your cheeks burned and you were thankful for your mask, but you doubted he needed to see your blush to know how flustered you were.

“I-O-Okay,” you stammered, stumbling over your words, warring between your nervousness and excitement, hands pressing down on your floor to help you turn. Before long your rear was facing the camera, cunt on full display. As you buried your face in a pillow, your arms reached back to grab your own butt. You took a deep breath and pulled your cheeks apart, giving a teasing wiggle as your back arched for him.

You sat there, face pressed into your pillow for maybe a minute before finally turning around, checking his response. The sight of his cock on full display greeted you, properly hard with a hand stroking it lazily as pre-cum beaded at his tip. It was one thing to see it in a picture, but on video… Your hands went up to your face, covering your masked cheeks out of pure instinct.

9:34 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Such a nice, wet pussy. Are you eager for me to fill that hole with my cum, pet? Show me where you want my cock.”

You swallowed again, resisting the urge to roll over and squeal like you did sometimes when you two were sexting. You were not sexting - well.

Kinda.

Cybering? Yeah. You were cybering.

You moved your hands down to your pubic mound, fingers lingering in your curls before sinking your fingers into the flesh, pulling upwards to expose a hint of your labia.

9:34 PM - WebRigger2099 - “That’s it, good girl. My lovely Fawn, so obedient.”

“Thank you, sir,” you gasped out, forcing a deep breath and settling your voice. “I-I want to be a good girl.” You rolled your hips back, showing off more of your groin. You weren’t exactly soaked - but you were wet. It was getting worse as you watched him stroke himself. You wondered what it would feel like under your touch.

9:35 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Now put the clamps on, Fawn.”

Swallowing hard, you nodded grabbing at the clamps you had left sitting on the floor beside you. The black tweezer tips were soft to the touch, colder metal giving way to a small adjustable crank that could tighten them into place. The two clamps were held together by a string of metal link, quietly twinkling as you brought them up to yourself. .

Your nipples were already hard, small buds poking out from your breasts like they were begging to be pinched and pulled. It would be so much easier if he was here himself, you thought. Then, you wouldn’t have to worry about spasming each time you brushed against them. He could make you do whatever he wanted. His hands looked strong, those arms clearly able to pin you.

You felt saliva pool in your mouth, and you swallowed. Hard.

You winced as the first clamp tightened onto your nipple, the sensitive flesh burning with pain as you adjusted the tightness. Too tight - you let a sigh of release loose as the pain relieved itself, more of a comfortable ache than an outright pain. You liked this sort of discomfort.

The next one quickly followed, you biting your lip as you pressed your breasts together with the sides of your arms to show the clamps off to Web.

“How’s this, Sir?”

9:35 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Good, Fawn. Now pull on that chain for me.”

You clenched your teeth, eyes shutting for a moment before nodding. Mean. He was mean .

You really shouldn’t have liked it as much as you did.

A hand rose, sheepishly curling a finger over the chain and pulling ever so slightly. It was enough, forcing you to gasp aloud.

“Ah! Fuck .” You couldn’t help the curse, tears beading at the edges of your eyes from the sheer sensitivity.

9:35 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Good girls don’t curse. Do I need to punish you for that foul mouth? How about this: Again. Harder this time.”

You nodded again, pulling harder and locking your hips into place to help stifle the powerful jolt of pleasure through your spine. It still had you nearly jump, butt clenching and shoulders shuddering.

9:35 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Again. Color.”

All the while, his other hand had been stroking his intimidating length, swollen veins running along his tan shaft while his dark balls hung beneath, drawing tight and high. You could almost imagine how close he was to his peak, just from watching you.

“Green. Green,” you gasped, releasing the chain as your body shivered.

9:35 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Good girl. Sweet little Fawn. How about you start using some of that lube now, get yourself ready for your dildo? You want to show me how you’d take my cock, don’t you?”

“Yes, Sir.”

For a moment, you sat there, glancing over at the small lube bottle and the black toy. Slowly, resisting the urge to squeeze the dildo like a stressball, you picked the thing up, staring at it.

He was seriously bigger than this?

Instead, you squeezed out a palm-full of lube and applied it generously to the dildo, stroking over the toy until it was coated in a layer of slickness. Next was yourself, though you gave yourself a minute to breathe before inhaling a lung-full of air and nodding. The somewhat cold liquid alerted your senses as you lathered it across your opening and slipped your fingers inside yourself.

You were already wet, but lube could hardly hurt . It’s not like you were used to taking insertions like this, only ever really using your fingers before now - and even then, that was sparing .

You had ridden the dildo a few times by now - but only ever in short, contained clips for Web, and never in front of anybody like you now were.

9:36 PM - WebRigger2099 - “That’s a good pet, prepare that pretty pussy for me. Let’s see how deep you can take it.”

Your hand shook a little as it rested on your lips, dildo in hand to tease along your seam, the slightly curved edge giving it an ever-slightly realistic shape. Teasing yourself like this was agony, you would have far preferred to lay back and let him do whatever he wanted to you, but you were eager to please.

“Oooookay. Just.. might take a minute..,” you managed as your hand lingered, nervousness freezing your muscles in place.

You could take a few inches without much issue, you knew that mechanically. Objectively. Experimentations had proven that you could get pretty far down, if you were relaxed and tried hard enough.

You could even film it for him, but to do it while he was watching, stroking his cock openly in front of you? Your eyes shifted back to the screen, the man’s hand tightening around the shaft of his lengthy member. He had said before he was eight inches. This dildo was six, and that was already scary.

You swallowed hard, watching him pump out a few strokes to you, shifting your hand placement so that he would have a better view of your pussy. Slowly but surely, the lube did its work and before you even meant for it to properly slide inside there it was, an inch deep.

Your butt clenched, thighs quivering while the arm supporting your weight behind you shook faintly, an aching soreness beginning to spread.

“I want you, Sir,” you admitted, biting your lip as you half teased him, half tortured yourself. It was the most you could manage, and despite the burning at your cheeks you were proud. You could see by the way his cock twitched in his hand he was too, his massaging strokes growing more rapid.

9:36 PM - WebRigger2099 - “That’s right, Fawn. Put it inside. Show me how you want me to fuck you, pet.”

You inched yourself down, feeling the dull ache intermixed with pleasure as the toy pressed into your pussy. You let out a ragged gasp, pausing to lift your hips back up, slowly settling back down. You settle into a shallow rhythm, desperately trying to not play the pathetic, anxiety ridden virgin you really were.

Right now, you were Fawn.

You stuttered for a moment in anxiety, rolling your arms to settle your hands back behind you as your legs shivered in discomfort. After a moment, you tried to force most of the dildo into you, forcing a gasp to leave your lips as the aching pressure only got worse.

You could barely take 3/4ths of this damn thing - you sure as hell couldn’t think about trying to take Web right now. Thankfully, your furrowed brows were mostly out of view.

Web was muted, but you swear you could hear the clap of the edge of his hand against his balls, each pump up and down his cock faster than the last. You took it as encouragement, a small smile forming on your lips despite the pain inside you. You were never too worried about pain, it so often came hand in hand with pleasure to you.

Rolling your hips, you half-rode, half-ground against the dildo as you lifted your butt higher, desperately searching for that special nook that promised your peak.

Eventually, a little surprisingly, you did. Your slender fingers and sensitive body could only do so much to yourself, but this was perhaps as close as you had ever gotten to a proper orgasm. You leaned into it, smile widening as you took control of your own pleasure. Up and down you bounced against the dildo, each drop sending it deep inside you. Surely you could reach a new record tonight and earn those rewards he promised, you mused to yourself. Or you would later, since your brain was quickly becoming putty in the present.

As nice as this was, it wasn’t sustainable, not forever. Your legs were quickly getting tired, aching muscles ready to give out. You had to readjust, your torso leaning forward so that you could sit on your knees and ride it that way, hands and knees holding you up.

As your weight shifted, you underestimated just how much pain your thigh would spike with. The adjustment made it kick out, foot striking the bottle of lube and knocking it into your bed frame with a loud bang. You winced, mortified, head whipping around to look at what had happened. Your second mistake. The quick motion had you collapsing on your ass, falling straight on your tailbone and sending a jolt of pain up your spine. You cursed.

Loudly.

Your cheeks burned . You half wanted to dive for the computer and shut it, but his message popped into view just in time.

9:38 PM - WebRigger2099 - “You okay, Fawn?”

“I’m so fucking stupid,” you muttered, not even thinking about it as you lurched and grabbed your aching tailbone. Your whole body hurt now and you were pretty fucking positive Aurora would have heard that. Desperately, you sat up on your knees, looking over the laptop at your barricaded bedroom door.

“I-I fuck. Fuck, I’m dumb. Should’ve expected, honestly,” you were just rambling to yourself at this point as you went to retrieve the slightly spilled bottle of lube, clipping the cap closed and sitting back on your knees. Eyeing the computer, you frowned, seeing that Web had paused and was leaned forward, both hands on the laptop. You glanced down at his text.

9:38 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Stop. Breathe. Don’t you dare call yourself that again, understood?”

“Sorry,” was all you could manage to say. You took a deep breath, unsure what to do at this point. Your hands basically wandered around the floor as you sat back down on your knees. Anxiety was completely eating you up at this point.

“I always fuck everything up,” you mumbled again, moving to pick up the black dildo, assuming that well - you two were done. You ruined the mood and you hated yourself for it.

9:39 PM - WebRigger2099 - “You don’t. You’re beautiful and - fuck - I nearly came. Good girl, it usually takes me a while. Take a moment. Deep breaths.”

He had obviously stopped stroking himself at that point, but his head was slick with pre-cum, his cock twitching with sensitivity as it stood hard as a rock despite the miscalculation. You could see just a hint of it as he shifted in his seat. You couldn’t tell if it was a bed, couch or something else.

You took a deep breath again, wiping your teary eyes. “That’s good,” you sighed. You rubbed over your arm, fingers drawing over the massive tattoo on your upper arm. The fawn’s teary eyes sure fit how you felt right now.

9:39 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Set the dildo aside, get out the lovense.”

You remembered setting up the controls when you first got it with him, but you had been too shy to bring up trying it just yet. To do so live would be exhilarating and terrifying at the same time. A simple slide of his finger on the app and the toy would start buzzing harder.

Doing as you were told, you placed the dildo on a towel you had set on the ground nearby quickly followed by your bottle of lube. Producing the lovense, you looked it over, frowning. The big device was like a big U shaped hook, the big bulbous end seemingly meant for insertion. The site called it an egg vibrator. With the sheer amount of lube still coating you, you skipped pumping out another squirt and instead pressed the fat end against your entrance, slipping cozily inside with ease now that you had been stretched open.

The device went deeper than you were expecting, but it wasn’t uncomfortable by any means. What did alarm you is where the smaller hook had ended up resting, the thinner tip nestled right up against your clit.

You got the feeling it wasn’t just for keeping it in place anymore. You swallowed hard, looking back to the camera and clearing your throat.

“I’m-I’m ready, Sir,” you said sheepishly.

9:41 PM - WebRigger2099 - “We’ll start on a low setting. Let you get used to it.”

Nodding to show you saw the message, you hummed, eyes watching him produce his cellphone - a sleek black android without a single decoration, even the case plain and boring. You couldn’t help the snicker that almost left your lips - of course he would have an android.

His thumb slipped across the screen and without delay you felt a vibration against your walls.

Subconsciously, you clenched, grimacing at the unfamiliar sensation. It wasn’t bad , just strange, awkward.

9:43 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Color.”

You shifted on your knees, ignoring the discomfort still in your tailbone and hip.

“G… Green,” your voice was softer now, more nervous. Every so often, you risked a glance at the door, but nobody showed, blessedly. Maybe everyone was watching a movie together or something.

9:43 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Eyes on me. Focus, fawn.”

You saw Web raise the settings a tad without warning, a small punishment for your distracted glances. You clenched around the toy, sitting back and glancing at his feed.

His hand had returned to his cock, slow kneading strokes trailing the length of his manhood up and down while his other hand held the phone. As if simulating his own strokes, the thumb at his phone drew up and down, sending waves of vibration inside you. It had you bite down on your lip, leaning forward and placing a hand on the floor.

Clicking a button on his phone, the vibrator returned to a constant, dull stimulation before he went to type out another message, his cock bobbing as he released it.

9:44 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Should I turn it up higher, pet? Color.”

“Green, please,” you gasp out, placing your other hand down on the floor to steady yourself.

He turned the settings up bit by bit, sliding his finger slowly up the phone. The buzzing within you grew intense, almost unbearable, but it was reaching a spot you had finally discovered today after so many sessions of sheepish masturbation attempts and picture taking. You felt a deep ache within you waiting to finally be released, pent up frustration building like steam in a kettle.

9:44 PM - WebRigger2099 - “More?”

“Please - fuck , please,” you begged, your fingers digging into the carpet beneath you, desperate for something to cling to.

9:44 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Language.”

He scolded you, his message was dripping in the warnings of swiftly approaching punishment. Would he push the settings to max, watch you squirm uncontrollably as the vibrator made you buck?

No. Everything stopped, that blissful feeling inside you halted all at once. He had turned it off. You could scream, you wanted to snap at him for his cruelty. You were getting so close and he - he robbed you of your peak.

“Sorry,” you mumbled, not particularly meaning it. It wasn’t hard to tell there was no regret in your tone, not with how petulant you sounded.

9:45 PM - WebRigger2099 - “I’ll make you sorry. Turn around and spank yourself. Hard. You’ve said that word six times since we’ve been on video, so you’ll give yourself six spanks.”

You whimpered audibly at his command, begrudgingly turning around to expose your oozing cunt to him.

“ Is… Isn’t edging me enough ?” you complained like you could hear him reply.

Of course you were only speaking to the air. You had already turned around, obedient as ever to Web. You did things without fully thinking them through often times, his daily commands overriding any natural instinct or desires that usually distracted you one way or another. He kept you responsible and healthy. He was good at this.

Your thighs were slick with arousal by now, a desperate need for his cock suffusing every thought in your brain - what thoughts were left, anyway. Your torso collapsed forward, a forearm being used as a pillow against your face while your other arm reached over to squeeze your own rear tentatively.

You lifted your hand high, arm trembling as you tried to aim for your own cheeks without sight. This wasn’t the most humiliating thing he had asked you to do, this should have been easy… As long as no one interrupted and saw you spanking yourself in front of a computer screen, all would be fine.

That was not a conversation you wanted to have with any of your five roommates, especially Taylor.

She was just - judgmental sometimes. Not that she didn’t engage in stuff like this herself in person, probably. God knew she brought home enough girls to your house to convince you that she dabbled in some questionable stuff. She just… Well, you didn’t need your roommates to know what you were doing right now.

Your arm stiffened before coming down, a light clap sounding in the air. You winced in pain, the aim clearly off as you smacked against hard bone instead of soft flesh. You adjusted your aim, wrist trembling, and crack ! Another down, aim better this time. It had you hissing from the sting, surprising yourself at your own strength - or maybe your sensitivity.

You opted to be a tad gentler for the rest, firm enough to leave a red blush but not so hard as to sound like thunder and disturb anyone. You had to be at least a little careful with the noise. You were thankful your bedroom was so far away from everyone else’s.

When you turned back around, Web’s latest message was waiting for you.

9:46 PM - WebRigger2099 - “You’re lucky you won’t have to be the one spanking you when I meet you in person. Your inexperience is showing, Fawn. Still, you did well for a beginner. Good girl.”

Web had stopped stroking himself by now, hard cock still in clear view but untouched. Almost as soon as you finished reading his message the buzz began again. It took you a fraction of a second to realize it was on max settings.

You nearly buckled then and there, your knees turning to jelly.

You bit your lip to stop yourself from cursing again. The last thing you needed was another punishment. Instead, you simply collapsed, face in view of the camera and eyes shut tight as your hands went to your sex to help rub out the swiftly approaching orgasm.

Your own touch was nervous, as if you had never masturbated before in your life. This simple little toy was a godsend, or maybe it was Web’s skilled manipulation of both the toy and you, you weren’t sure. Whatever the case, your head touched the clouds as you climbed your peak for the first time.

You were too dazed to speak when it was over, the contractions inside you clenching around the toy as your hips weakly spasmed. Tears from your hard orgasm blurred your vision, breath shot as you took in inhales with stuttering gasps.

9:49 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Good pet. So obedient. You did very well today. How did you enjoy my gifts?”

“Yes,” you croaked out, voice tired and worn, rolling your head to the side as you watched his messages.

9:50 PM - WebRigger2099 - “You’ve earned yourself some rest, Fawn. I won’t keep you. Message me when you wake up tomorrow, understood? I have much to think about. I’ll have a treat for you to wake up to.”

You took a moment to stabilize yourself, pulling the toy from your vagina with a gasp and just letting it drop to the floor. You’d clean it in the dead of night… later. Slowly you lifted yourself up onto your arms and nodded.

“O…okay. Uhm.. goodnight,” you said, eyes still on his torso, seeing that he was breathing hard.

9:50 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Goodnight, Fawn. You did very good. I’m proud of you.”

His screen clicked to black an instant later.

9:50 PM - WebRigger2099 - Has gone offline.

So, you tossed the wet toys and lube in the small plastic tote to take out after everyone went to bed, wiped yourself off with baby wipes and redressed. You ended up checking on your roommates and found them all home from the bar, somehow and extremely invested in another Chris Chan documentary on youtube, using the projector as a TV hooked up to Taylor’s laptop.

So, thankfully nobody noticed. You got water, you cleaned your toys and hid them back under your tiny bed.

The first thing you did the next morning was check your messages, a hand covering your face as you smiled and blushed at the image sent.

Web’s torso was on full display, cock angled up so she could see its undercarriage. Along his stomach and past his belly button was a pool of sticky white, stray spurts seemingly shot further up his torso before the main gush was emptied out. The text with it was simple:

7:04 AM - WebRigger2099 - You gave me a lot to think about.

7:04 AM - WebRigger2099 - Message me when you wake up and we’ll discuss how everything went.

You could squeal in joy. You did that to him. You did that despite falling on your ass and nearly bruising your hip like an idiot.

You were not in love - who could fall in love with a stranger on the internet so quickly? - but damn did it help you feel good about yourself.

#miguel spiderverse #miguel o'hara #spiderman 2099 #across the spiderverse #atsv miguel #miguel x reader #miguel ohara #into the spider verse #miguel o'hara smut

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lovetaroandtaemin · 3 months ago

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Kinktober 2024

Day 23: Breeding Kink

Goo Gunil x Reader

Word Count: 1,595

THIS FIC IS NSFW, MINORS DNI!!!

Warnings: Mean dom!Gunil x sub!Reader, breeding kink, reader is a MASSIVE brat, reader records herself masturbating, safewords are mentioned but not used, unprotected sex, rough sex, creampie, daddy kink, a little bit of crying, degradation, dumbification, overstimulation. If you think I missed a warning, let me know!

A/N: If you would like to be added to my Kinktober taglist, you can send an ask, send a dm, or comment on any of my Kinktober-related posts with the username that you'd like tagged. Happy reading!

Taglist: @unlikelysublimekryptonite

Fic is under the cut.

Gunil knew from the moment he left your apartment to go to the studio that you were going to act like a brat. Why did you find so much enjoyment in teasing him at work specifically? He had no idea, but usually he didn’t care. For the most part, your brattiness while he was at work was manageable. You would flirt with him a bit over text, but you always stopped as soon as you were reprimanded. This time, however, you decided to go significantly beyond your typical antics. You’d hardly seen him for weeks, and now that you both had a day off from work, he had promised you that you’d spend the day together. Then he got a call from Jungsu, and he rushed off to the studio. Sure, he told you that he would make it up to you, but you still wanted his attention right then and there. So, you felt you were well within your rights to act like a brat.

You decided to begin your antics by sending Gunil a bunch of texts about how badly you wanted him to come home and fuck you. That didn’t really bother him in all honesty. What really started to get to him was when you started sending him texts about how badly you specifically wanted him to pump you full of his cum and get you pregnant. That was strike one. Since you’d found out that he had a breeding kink, you’d used it to your advantage. He knew that was what you were doing, so he reminded you that he really had to work.

Strike two was when you sent Gunil a picture of you wearing his favorite set of lingerie that you owned. It was baby pink, with an adorable floral pattern. He loved how sweet you looked when you wore it, and seeing the picture only made him more desperate to get done what he needed to do so he could come home and rail you. He still had work to do, however, so he told you again how important it was for you to behave because he had to work. You originally decided to behave, but once you had an idea, your decision changed.

You slowly removed the lingerie that you were wearing and started to rub your clit. You knew that you’d get in trouble for touching yourself, but that was kind of the point. You loved it when Gunil was rough with you, and you knew that was exactly what would happen if you pushed his buttons. Sure, you knew that his work was important, but you also knew that he would never actually let you get in the way of his work. Besides, if he actually had a problem with how you were acting, he would use your safeword. Instead, he had only teased you back, so you figured that it wouldn’t be a big deal.

While you continued teasing your clit with one hand, you started an audio recording with the other. When you were certain your phone was recording, you moved your hand faster and made a point to moan louder than you typically would. It was against most of Gunil’s rules for you, but that was why you were doing it. Once you were satisfied with the length of the recording, you sent it.

Once you sent the recording, you watched your phone diligently for a response from Gunil. It took a few minutes for him to see your message, but when he did, his reaction was exactly what you were looking for. At first, the typing bubble popped up and disappeared again over and over as he struggled to figure out what to say in response to your stunt. Then, the indication that he was typing went away for what felt like an eternity. When it popped back up, you waited. Then, he finally responded with a message that said, “I’ll be home in 10 minutes. When I get there, you’d better be naked and bent over on the bed.”

And that was strike three.

For a brief moment, you considered not following instructions, either by getting yourself fully dressed or by waiting in a different position. In the end, though, you decided against it. You had already gotten yourself into quite a bit of trouble, and you didn’t know if you wanted it to be worse than it was going to be. So, you bent over on your bed, already naked from your earlier stunt.

You waited for what felt like ages for Gunil to get home, but realistically it was probably only a few minutes. You knew that he was home because you heard him clear his throat behind you and say, “What the fuck was that?”

“What do you mean, daddy?”

“You know exactly what I mean, sweetheart. Why did you send me a recording of you touching yourself while you knew I was working?”

“I missed you and wanted your attention.”

“You are aware that you don’t have to act like a brat to get my attention, right?”

“I know, but it’s so much more fun this way.”

“If you’re gonna be this fucking mouthy, maybe I should just make you watch me get off instead of fucking you like I originally planned.”

“Please fuck me, daddy. I promise I’ll be a good girl.”

“That’s what I thought.” Gunil paused for a moment before he added, “What’s your color, baby?”

“Green.”

“Good girl.”

Gunil inserted his cock into you with no warning. You winced at the sudden intrusion, but it didn’t take long for the pain you were feeling to turn to pure pleasure. While he fucked you, he said things like “You’re such a slut,” and “You’re lucky I wasn’t busy with anything important.” You wanted to be embarrassed by the way that he degraded you, but it only added to the pleasure.

The moans that fell from your lips were like music to Gunil’s ears. Sure, he had left a lot of work to be done at the studio, but coming home to fuck you was a welcome break from it all. When he felt you around him, it was like all of the stress he was feeling around his job went away, and all he needed to worry about was making you feel good.

“Fuck, princess. Feels so good,” Gunil said with a groan, “Can’t wait to fill you up with my cum.”

“Please, please, please,” you chanted, too out of it to really tell what you were begging for. You knew that Gunil was talking to you, but you were so fucked out you only caught every other word. You heard the words “fill” and “cum,” though, and that was all you needed to understand. As he continued fucking you, it was like your brain shut off. How he was that good at fucking you, you’d never know. You would never complain, though.

“You’re taking it so well, baby,” he said, “It’s like you were made for me.”

When Gunil heard you mumble, “Harder, daddy,” it took every ounce of self-control that he had in order to not cum right then and there. He wanted to make this last as long as possible, though, so he held out as long as he could. The way your pussy seemed to suck him in while you begged him for more made it infinitely more difficult, however.

When you felt a familiar heat in the pit of your stomach, you pleaded with Gunil to let you cum. For a moment, he considered toying with you by telling you that you wouldn’t be allowed to cum at all after the stunt you pulled to get him home. Watching you babble and sob as he fucked you made him go soft, though. So, he said, “Go ahead, baby. Cum for daddy.”

As soon as you had permission, you came with a scream. Gunil continued fucking you through your release, desperate to reach his own. When he felt his orgasm approaching, he asked, “I’m close, baby. Are you ready?”

You nodded and said, “Please fill me up, daddy. Want you to give me a baby.” With one more loud groan, Gunil stilled inside of you, filling you with his cum. He continued to fuck you through the aftershocks of his release until you said, “’s too much, daddy.”

Gunil quickly pulled out, helping you to stand. You held onto him for dear life as you found your footing. Once he was certain you were stable, he helped you to the bathroom and into the shower. You whined when he had to let go of you, but you quickly calmed down when he got into the shower with you. As he helped you wash up, you felt nothing but love for him. Sure, you’d primarily said that you wanted Gunil to give you a baby in the heat of the moment, but the more you thought about it, the more you realized you did actually want to have kids with him one day.

When you were both done in the shower, you practically dragged Gunil back to your bed to cuddle. He wanted to protest, citing the work that he had left unfinished to come home, but he didn’t have the heart to tell you no when you still seemed to be in such a vulnerable headspace. So, he happily got into bed with you, holding you close while he told you over and over how much he loved you and how badly he wanted a family with you.

Thank you for reading! If you'd like to see what else I've written so far and the rest of what's planned, you can find my Kinktober masterlist here. If you'd like to read one of my non-Kinktober works, you can find my general masterlist here. If you'd like to see what I'm going to be working on once Kinktober is over, you can find my upcoming works here. If none of that interests you, or there's something specific you'd like to see, send a request via asks or dms!

Thank you again for reading, happy spooky season!

#kpop fanfic #kpop imagines #kpop smut #xdinary heroes x reader #xdinary heroes fanfic #xdinary heroes smut #gunil smut #gunil x reader

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sweet-honey-bunnies · 2 months ago

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Important Update

Hello, everyone. I just wanted to make an update post regarding my current situation, and to let everyone know about what's exactly been happening.

I am so, so sorry for suddenly disappearing and being inactive; my physical health has suddenly started rapidly deteriorating these past few weeks, and due to a multitude of health issues, I've not been able to properly log onto Tumblr and check my notifications. I currently have over 99+ notifications and am planning to go through them all over the next few weeks, but in the meantime, I kindly ask that you please refrain from tagging me in any new donation posts. I wouldn't want to risk older notifications being buried under multiple new ones, and I wouldn't want to keep anyone who's previously tagged me waiting longer than they have been already.

I'll also be leaving my askbox and submissions indefinitely closed for reasons similar to this, but please don't worry! If you're a Palestinian blogger who needs to reach out to me, my private messages are still currently open. While it may take some time for me to reply back to you as my health issues have greatly limited my day-to-day function, I'll try to properly look through my messages whenever I have enough energy to.

Again, I deeply apologize for my sudden absence, and will try my best to get to all of my notifications to the best of my ability. Though it may take a little while as I'm still struggling with my health, I'll try my best to get to everyone <3

I'll also be tagging fellow blogs who share donation posts who've recently tagged me under the read more to let you all know about what's happening; I would normally DM everyone, but tagging would be easier in this instance since typing for prolonged periods of time has become quite difficult for me (but please let me know if you'd rather me DM you in future instances! I'd like for everyone to feel comfortable <3).

@c-u-c-koo-4-40k @comrademango @murderbot @a-shade-of-blue @heydreamchild @myceliacrochet @rainy-fog @rhythmlessgay

#colored text

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stuffing-seattle · 8 months ago

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Angie and Sasha Part 2:

Ever since Sasha’s night of ecstasy, that one mental image was burned into the back of her brain: Her midsection swollen with babies and food, practically lifting her off the ground as she rested on it like a bed. A tall, leather-clad woman stuffing food into her fat cow cheeks everytime she had a chance to breathe. Strangers walking up behind her, dropping their pants and using her at their pleasure, ensuring her cunt was always overflowing with cum and her womb was always manufacturing life.

It was like a curse. As soon as she had discovered this, she had been able to give herself the biggest, sheet-soaking orgasms of her life. And she still could, but each time, there was a little nibbling feeling left over. A feeling that grew in intensity everytime she indulged her dark fantasy. It started slowly. First she joined dating apps. At first it was good enough to tease the boys and the ghost then, masturbating to fantasies that would never be.

Then that wasn’t enough, so she kept them on the hook a little longer and engaged in light sexting to quell her carnal desires. This helped some, but the aching emptiness in her womb was still too much to ignore. That and the fact anytime Sasha would mention getting knocked up, her partner would ghost her immediately, even if it was only a fantasy. 6 months after D-day, Sasha joined her first fetish site. She was hesitant at first, but figured if she didn’t post pictures, she would be fine.

Once she created her blank profile, she found some solace in reading about other’s experiences and getting off to the pictures of other beautiful mommy’s to be. The satisfied her for a while, but once again that feeling grew. To try and combat it this time, she started posting her thoughts. How she wanted to be blown up with babies. How she wanted to be used like a farm animal. She dropped a few hints about her location because the thrill made it seem more real somehow.

That was when she got the DM. It was short and to the point. “If you are serious about wanting to be used, I’ll be in Green Cove on the 15th. I’ll be by the old dead tree in blue swim trunks. Come in your bathing suit and I’ll make sure you leave with a baby in your belly.”

Sasha snorted at the message initially. First off, it was the middle of Fall, and cold as shit outside. Who would go to the beach at a time like this? The longer she sat with it though…. The guy had to be a local. Green Cove was only thirty minutes from her and she knew exactly the tree he was talking about. She mulled it over in her head for a moment before clicking on his profile. What she saw made her drool. The guy behind the profile was muscular, tall, and sporting a 9 inch cock in most of his pictures.

She had dismissed the idea initially, but now her body was burning with baby fever. She looked at the calendar. The 15th was only a week away. She knew it was stupid, she knew it could never end well, but her body had already made her choice for her. She was going to that beach on the 15th.

The day finally rolled around and Sasha was practically shaking with anticipation and horniness. She put on the skimpiest bathing suit she had, and a long peacoat over that. As much as the idea of the general public seeing her half naked made her pussy drool, she just didn’t have the confidence to go all the way yet.

With everything on, she stepped out of her room… only to run directly into Angie. Angie eyed her up and down. “Where you headed?” She asked. Flustered, Sasha replied, “Uh nowhere. Out for a walk.” Angie eyed her suspiciously. “Awful shitty weather for a walk.” She was right it was cold and the sky was overcast.

“Ah you know… just need some fresh air.” Sasha said lamely. Angie was not satisfied but gave way anyway. “Whatever you say.” She shrugged and she disappeared into her room. Sasha breathed a sigh of relief and made her way to the beach.

Sasha pulled up and sat in her car for endless minutes. Was she really going to do this? Was she really going to give up her virginity to some random guy on a beach? The burning in her belly and loins gave her all the answer she needed.

She stepped out and made her way onto the beach. She spotted him immediately, as the fallen tree wasn’t far from the beach entrance. Just as he said he was there, in his blue swimming trunks, sitting on beach towel listening no to music. Sasha looked around the rest of the beach and it was a ghost town. Figured for the weather. Before she could decide this was a bad idea, he waved to her. No going back now.

She made her way over to him. When she was close enough, he said, “You PrincessKittenX?” She nodded hesitantly and he broke into a grin. “Fucking finally. I thought you weren’t gonna show.” Without further ado here beckoned her to follow, and he took them around the other side of the fallen tree. “So I can watch for people.” He explained.

Sasha gulped down the knot in her throat. He looked her up and down. “I thought I told you to wear a bathing suit.” He said. Sasha unbuttoned her peacoat and let it drop to the sand. “That’s more like it.” He said, his eyes gleaming with hunger as if sizing up a juicy cut of meat. Sasha knew she should be afraid but FUCK was she turned on. He circled her, taking in every inch of her body. He gave her tiny tits a hard squeeze.

Goosebumps raced across her skin, and she had to bite her lip to keep from moaning. “Dont know how you expect to feed babies with these.” He grumbled. “But I guess that’s your problem.” He circled to the back of her and ran his hands down the curve of her hips. She was briefly caught off guard by this show of affection before he punctuated it with a hard smack to her barely covered ass. This time she could do nothing to stifle a yelp and a moan. “Huge fuckin ass and hips though… at least you won’t have trouble blasting babies out.”

Sasha knew she should be humiliated by what he was saying. That she should maybe even slap him… but all she felt was an overwhelming need for him to take her right then and there. Her legs were trembling, but it’s was not from the brisk air. He looked at her expectantly, and she froze not knowing what to do.

“Fuck you act like you have never done this before.” He said. Sasha blushed but said nothing. “Hurry up.” He commanded. “Bend over.” Without hesitation, Sasha did as she was told. She stuck her fat ass into the air and braced her forearms on the dead tree in front of them. “At least you know how to take orders.” He mumbled, and she heard his bathing suit hit the ground behind her. His words were enough to light a fire in her womb.

She was practically shaking. She needed his cock, needed it ramming inside her. She needed her womb blown up with his seed and his bastards. She couldn’t take it anymore and she moaned a little. “You really need it bad, don’t you whore?” He asked. She could only whimper and wiggle her ass towards him in responses. He took a hold of her plush hips, and then slid her bikini bottoms to one side.

“Hope your pussy is a slutty as you are, because I’m diving right in.” It was, it fucking was. She was practically dripping already waiting for him. He slammed his cock into her all the way to the base on the first thrust. She gasped at the initial pain, but that was soon replaced with her desperate whimpers and moans each time his cock slammed into her. He was doing exactly as he had told her. He was not focusing on making her cum at all. He was enjoying her big fat ass and slamming her as hard and fast as he could to watch her ass wobble and jiggle underneath him. He was not making love to her, he was not even fucking her. He was just animalistically breeding her. Shoving his cock as far into her with each thrust to ensure he was as close to her womb as possible when he finally released.

Her finger nails dug into the soft wood, and she could swear she was seeing stars and starbursts of color in her vision as the pain and pleasure mixed into an indescribable swirl of ecstasy. It was not long before he leaned forward and growled, “I’m about to cum. You ready for my babies, bitch?” Sasha wanted to scream “YES FUCK ME YES, MAKE ME YOUR BITCH!” But she was too lost in the moment. He grabbed a fist full of her hair and yanked her head back towards him. “I asked if you are ready to be a mommy he hissed into her ear.”

“Yes!” She moaned. “Make me a big fat mommy.” He obliged and slammed into her as deep as he could get. She felt his cock twitch and spasm inside of her, followed by a slow, spreading warmth that seemed to burn into her whole being. She whined a little. She was so close to cumming but was just shy of it. She wanted to ask for more cock and more babies, but she knew he wasn’t there for that. Instead, she slumped forward onto the tree, and his cock slipped out of her with an audible *pop*.

She heard his shorts being lifted back up. He put a strong hand on her now blown out ass and took a big handful of it. He moved her ample cheek to one side to admire his work. Her tight little cunt was already overflowing with his thick white cum. She could feel the warm trail starting to ooze down her thighs.“Good girl. You’ll make a really good mommy.” With that he gave her ass another hard smack and said, “Enjoy all your new little bastards.”

As soon as his hand made contact with her was the last thing she needed. She moaned loudly, and her whole body stared to spasm. Her knees shook, and the power and suddenness of her orgasm over took her so fully, that after a few seconds, she felt a second, stronger stream of warmth join his cum trailing down her legs, darkening the sand beneath her. *Piss? Or squirt?* Were the hazy thoughts that filtered through her brain. She didn’t know, and didn’t care too much either.

He saw this and only laughed at her. “You really are a dirty whore huh?” She could only loll her in an approximation of a nod. “Well, I had fun. I’ll text you the next time I need a cum dump. And if it takes, keep me in the loop. I want to fuck you when you are all swollen with babies.” With that, his business was concluded. He made his way back down the beach, without looking back at her. Sasha was left with her ass in the air and absolutely soiled…. And she loved it. God she fucking loved it and wished there were five more guys lined up behind her. She remained in her position for a few more minutes as if it would beckon new strangers.

When it didn’t, she reluctantly picked up her coat, fastened it, and limped back to her car.

#breeding k1nk #hucow fantasy #impregnate her #submisive and breedable #preggo kink

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flyingspicerack · 2 years ago

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hey guys, this is very hard for me to talk about and bring up, but ive talked to a few people about it in priv already, and I think im ready to publicly talk about it...

When i joined the ososan fandom back in March, it was a bit... dead? And i was trying to grasp at straws, trying to find people to connect to, trying to make some friends, and came upon one person who I seemed to mesh with really well. She posted a lot about a big server she had full of people to talk about her content with and I was at first wary to join (i dont like big servers) but did so anyway. However, as I was wary, the two of us stayed in DMs for quite a while, in addition to me being in the big server as well. This person was equally reciprocating conversation with me, with equal excitement, with equal interest to the subject matter. I believe everything is going fine, them and I, i think, are becoming closer friends, she invited me to a smaller group run by someone else, things are good for a couple weeks. Im showing up and watching art streams, sure, im a little awkward, its a new group of people and I have adhd and am very neurodivergent (to which she claims she is as well) so i'm a bit... weird or whatever, but who isnt??

Then, I'm pulled aside, im pulled into a smaller group chat with this person and two 'mediators' to which this person proceeds to tear into me, telling me that i make her uncomfortable, that im being codependent with her (bitch the 'co' in 'codependency' implies ur reciprocating but claimed i was the only problem), i put her up on a pedestal, says our age gap is weird, etc. (I have screenshots of the whole 'confrontation' if ppl want to see it) and i was terrified... She never indicated prior to this that I was making her uncomfortable... I thought i was doing everything correctly, i thought i was being a friend, i thought we were equally excited to hang out with one another?

So, from this, because of this, this bitch fucking traumatized me. She had me believing, and still trying to unlearn, that i am annoying, that i am a nuisance, that im a bother to everyone that i come around, she destroyed my self esteem and destroyed how i try to make friendships because i am SO SCARED all the time now... that one of you is going to turn around and tell me that I put you on some kind of pedestal, that im being annoying and bothering you all too much, its why i disappeared the other day because i got scared i was posting too much, that i got scared that i was ... doing something wrong...

So... ok now that im in it, writing this, excuse my lack of composure for the rest of this post, i tried to hold it but now im getting angry

SO FUCKING MEANWHILE THIS BITCH, talking about codependency and age gaps in friendships, her two 'lackeys' apparently were her ONLY friends during like 4 years of her life (codependent hippocracy) AND she was into ososan from the beginning when she was like fucking 14, and one of her lakeys is OLDER than me at 29 AND WAS FRIENDS WITH HER WHEN SHE WAS 22 AND THIS BITCH WAS 14 SO you're gonna sit here and tell me that OUR age gap is weird when THAT SHIT is going on????????????????????? And fucking- PUTTING you on a fucking PEDESTAL?? when YOU are the one who is the OVERLORD of this fucking server you have with like 50+ peons, AND you have this nasty ass notification in the server to alert EVERYONE when someone leaves to which is kinda creepy and controlling??

Anyway i responded scared out of my mind and backed off... she didnt want to cut me out, just limit conversation and take me out of the smaller knit circle and we could still be friends, but obviously this freaked me out and i didnt talk to her much after that.... ANYWAY so this person THEN has the audacity to reach out to me a month or so later and is like 'hey... we haven't talked much and i think something might have happened between us? are we ok? you're really distant" and then i fucking laid into her cause i had the month to think on it...

If any of this behavior sounds familiar to you, its bc the person 'in charge' is known as Ava, or pinklemonfruit here on tumblr, and one of her lackeys? Lovenu, who im pretty sure a lot of you already know of... theres another one, her name is emmy, her username here i believe is lichenqueen and was the other 'mediator' i have been told by one source that they potentially could be lying about their age, but take this with a grain of salt bc i have no proof of this

I unfortunately dove right into this when i came into the fandom bc i didn't know any better, i didn't know that these people were bad and caused problems back in the day... but now im aware and i need everyone else who may interact with them to know that they are not good people and have hurt me personally. They have caused me trauma that I am trying really hard to get over but i fear its going to take a long time...

This is MY personal story and account of interactions with these people and I will continue to believe what I know from personal experience. If you come to me, trying to defend any of these people or try to make light of this situation, you will no longer be allowed to associate with me. This fucked me up, and I will not compromise on this, you will no longer feel safe to be around if you condone how these people treated me. If you do not believe my words, then fine, but i will no longer desire company from people who will condone this type of treatment that I had to endure and have been suffering through the aftereffects of.

Thank you for taking the time to read about my story and im sorry if it ended up too personal at all. But, I really hope those that read this will... understand my timid behavior? Why im ALWAYS saying sorry? Why im always so scared in group setting like aggies, why im always so apprehensive and timid and keep thinking people are lying to me about really liking having me around? Its because of this, this is truly and horribly messed up to do to someone... making them feel so low and horrible about their existence ...

if you have any questions, i am willing to answer them...

#spice.txt #drama #uhhhh i dont exactly want to tag this in main tags or antyhing...#thank you for reading and taking this into consideration ....#tw trauma #trauma dump #???? do i tag that?????#bullying?????? I DUNNO?>????

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kpophubb · 2 years ago

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Hi lovely ☀️, how’s your Monday ?

I see you have being posting that you are not doing good mentally , I am worried :/ you can always talk to me about anything that bothers you , uk. Just write a kinda ✉️

Sorry I feel disconnected , it’s so hard to provide for myself with no additional financial support :( and this job , they always find some new ways to deduct smth from my payslip 💔

I slept 4h tday , and I feel so not working tday ., such a hard zombie day for me.. I hope you are doing better ?

I wanted to share a new song with you , I like the lyrics and it’s so smoothing (?) let me know if you like it

Also hv u seen txt Comeback,? Your thoughts ?

What’s up with your life now dear ?

I wish you a good week , have a good rest & get better , I’m here if u need me 🧡💛🧡

🐁

Hi hi my 🐁 anonie !! 😘🤍 BEEN A LONG TIME WE LAST TALKED?😭 I’m so happy to get another sweet ask from you. First of all, happy jungwon day 🎉🎂🎁🎈🎊😽

♡…first of all I’m really sorry for the late reply. You sent this on Monday and it’s Thursday already, I’m so sorry I was at my nana’s place and didn’t check tumblr for that while. :(

♡…second of all yeah.., I’m not doing very great atm😓 emotionally or physically. It’s okay please DONOT worry about me or stop talking about your rants just bc you feel like you’re disturbing me and being one sided. I know people who love to help others like you have this tendency, they shut out if they feel like they’re taking too much from someone without giving anything in return! Well i always disappear when I’m feeling bad, bc I like to deal w my mood swings alone but one thing I can tell you is that I have severe levels of social anxiety😓 which makes me really unable to maintain interaction/communication/relationship with people. Well..a lot happened and that caused this problem with me and so, even replying on tumblr, posting fics, answering asks and dms seem so overwhelming to me since the past few weeks. I can’t even open this app OR ANY OTHER APP, just any sort of interaction frightens and drains me so much 💔 it’s not w the people, or the way they talk to me it’s just me and 99% of the times my anxiety and fear that cause me to ghost people and just disappear sigh.

♡…but don’t worry, it’s not that bad cause I don’t mind being away from people, in fact I love it in a sense bc I like spending time with myself so much and it’s honestly very healing. 🤲🏻 🤍

♡… oh anonie everytime I hear about you having a hard time it really pains my heart :( cause you’re so dear to me. 💔 that sounds so rough I wish I could help you in any way and make it all magically better for you! Job life experience seems so hellish I hear so many people talk about it. Maybe I’ll be able to understand you better when I enter that life myself and earn to provide for my self, but that isn’t until I’m 24-25 when I graduate my bachelors program so yeah. I really hope god makes everything better for you, my love. I’ll be sure to include you in my sincere prayers.💗

♡… oh no 4 hours really seem so tiring and exhausting!😭 anonie I hope you can sleep better in the upcoming days! Being zombie sucks I know, I was zombie yesterday. I came back from a 5 hour car journey with the worst kinda sunny weather, so I was so sick 🤢 I passed out before 10 pm and woke up at 5:58 am today so I can tell I had an amazing sleep 🤲🏻

♡… new song huh?🤩 born again, okay I’ll be sure to listen to it. Also here’s a song suggestion by me that I feel like you’d love, it’s my current fav. It’s “skeletons” by Keshi! Also about txt, I don’t listen to their music unfortunately. Sadly, our music taste doesn’t align, that is exactly why I don’t Stan them. I just love them and their personalities a lot!!

♡… my life is so-so rn but I’m still so so grateful for everything I have! My life is still loaded with many many blessings so I’m always thankful for where I am, who I am and what I have! ✨ anonie, know that you can always talk to me too and I really cherish and love you. 🥺💜 life will get better please do not stress and look at the bright side no matter how small it is. Sometimes even being alive is a gift we should cherish. Cause as long as you wake up, everyday is a new chance. 🌟

𝕴 𝕷𝖔𝖛𝖊 𝖄𝖔𝖚 𝕾𝖔 𝕸𝖚𝖈𝖍

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dragoninahumancostume · 10 months ago

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I know I haven’t been online much and I haven’t comforted you or helped you when you needed it and for that I am so so sorry I should’ve been there and helped you

I’ve been taking a break from tumblr because I was spending upwards of 9 hours a day on the app I’ve uninstalled it off of my phone and when I do post or respond it’s when I’m on my computer and I’m checking my notifications which happens like once or twice a week but that’s basically it I don’t really check anyone’s blog anymore I just check who has interacted with me who pinged me who sent me an ask who has sent me a dm and then I go offline again until I decide or I feel the need to go check back again but even still that has been repressed because I don’t want to be spending all of my time on this website and while I love it to bits and I love the people here so goddam much and care about them too and that includes you but this app is as consuming my ire with me spending more and more time on it each day staying up till early hours of the morning not sleeping because I was scrolling and reading peoples posts, I’m sorry

I’m so so sorry for just disappearing more or less without giving you or anyone else notice, I don’t know when or if I will install the app again

But in any case I am so sorry, just know that I care about you and love you so much /p and if you ever need anything @ me or send me dm, I’ll send you my discord because I’ll respond sooner on that then on this just in case there is anything urgent or you just want to talk, again I am sorry

And I’m sorry if this seems like a vent post in your inbox, it isn’t meant to be I just want to let you know how sorry I am

@thethinkingaurora (so I know that you’ve received/read this so my dm with my discord doesn’t seem out of place and awkward)

I typed most of this without looking at my screen so if something doesn’t make sense or is misspelled that is why I find that if I’m looking at what I’m typing then it’s more refined than my actual thoughts and I’m t is less of my actual genuine thoughts

I’m sorry

It's okay don't worry

I forget that scrolling for hours is a thing tbh bc I genuinely only look at posts from people I follow and like once a day I go through my dash for five minutes (maybe my attention span is just pretty bad)

I don't have discord and I highly doubt I'm allowed to have it at all

I promise it's okay, take your time and take a break.

I'm bad at talking honestly so my vents are just rambles and I can't really put my thoughts together enough to talk about my feelings, so I don't think I'd even DM anyone, but thanks so much for trying to be there

I love you too <3

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uozlulu · 2 years ago

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I want to expand the week 4 story, so I’m going to yammer a bit under the cut and see if that gives me a direction tomorrow.

So, week 1 was Relationships/Pairings and I chose to tell Claudia/Madeleine’s possible romance arc, keeping it relatively simple but a bit fleshed out from the original concept (which was just the doll gift scene).

Week 2 is Scenes and Lines, so I kind of took a bunch of stuff I want explored and packaged it together to a) tell a coherent story and b) get all of it in there without having some long drawn out meandering nonsense. So that had Louis dealing with hallucinating Lestat vs. actually seeing Lestat, Lestat at his absolute lowest point, both of them grieving Claudia’s death, and then it hopped to the present day to tease the fact Lestat’s rock music exists because that will tie back into week 4.

Week 3 will be Outfits and Character Looks. So I created a story where Daniel explores the theater album that Armand threw to his feet last we left them in show canon, and from there I get to explore a) what Armand might wear on stage, b) what kinds of fucked up nonsense goes on in these plays, c) Daniel teasing a memory of the Devil’s Minion era, and then d) what Armand might wear if he stops wearing all black post-reveal (though I think it’s possible he might not stop wearing black because this is kind of Daniel’s (possibly extended) funeral in a way. Again, Claudia becomes a part of the narrative because it touches on what we learned from TVA about what Armand did to her. Because I want Claudia to exist in all four stories. The reason I kept the DM short is I think I already inadvertently covered what I want to see from the show regarding that that pretty well in that May You Get What You Desire Is a Curse upon the Dead fic.

Okay, so...

Week 4 will be Themes/Theories. I want this fic to tie up the previous three fics. I want Louis and Lestat reunited. I want to make nods to things like this interview is a way for Louis to draw Lestat to him, the tower in Dubai is probably Trinity Gate, and maybe nod in a the audience can take this as they want way that the interview is also a way for Louis and Armand to reunite with Daniel or perhaps for Louis to reunite them so he can break it off with Armand or whatever, that part will be more up in the air, a minor scene setting kind of detail to explain Louis’ presence on the balcony. The themes I want to touch on are things like, Louis and Lestat are drawn to each other, reconnecting, etc...etc...

So like the previous fics, I started with an about 600 - 700 word scene where Louis goes out on the balcony, hears Lestat’s voice singing form a distance, finishes the lyric, and Lestat joins him on the balcony. Louis points out that Lestat could be a ghost, Lestat points out he’s very much real and reveals he was indeed in the courtyard and saw Louis burn down the theater (reference to the week 2 story). Louis tells him that this place is open to all who wish to stay, invites him in, and the fic ends with them disappearing into a bedroom just before the sun rises.

So it’s not necessarily a bad story, i just think, much like I went doll gift > love story, courtyard scene > escape + burning down the theater, Daniel explores the album > actually writing out a couple of fucked up play excerpts, I need to dig a bit deeper with this one too.

One thing I considered was addressing the murder. Is it really the last time they saw each other? Have they seen each other in other places? Part of why this fic is the way it is is that you could rearrange Lestat’s plot points in such a way that several Louis ones happen in the present (though I suspect we’ll find that Louis is either fucking with Daniel about thinking Lestat is dead or Armand messed with his head (possibly with permission)), but that’s like a whole other fic and too messy to tackle here. While I want and expanded concept, I still want to keep things relatively simple and doable given that there’s a deadline.

I do know I’m going to reconfigure the opening a bit and rethink how I’ve presented some things.

But other than that, I’m really not sure how to expand this fic out and make it a bit deeper and juicier. Hopefully writing this out will help jumpstart some thoughts in the back of my brain that can bubble to the surface later.

#adventures in fic writing

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eldritchmochi · 2 months ago

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SO i have definitely experienced people talking about my fic in spaces i couldnt see; i exploded into bnf status in my current fandom and for a looong while just kept to myself, as i always had in fandom spaces. i still mostly lurk but i was convinced by friends made in this fandom to join some of the larger discords for the ship i primarily write for and man there was a LOT of discussion of my fic. even now, people will occasionally mention they read xyz and like four people will @ me and several others will @ the person excited about my fic to point them to the dedicated threads

from what ive seen, the reason people talk about fic "behind authors backs" in private or semi private spaces, like discord servers, is definitely yeah a lot of folks just dont know HOW to interact with fic and fic authors, but they want the community and joy of *talking* about the things theyre enjoying reading. its a x2 combo search for community where a lot of fic authors (myself included) struggle to engage with their readers, and fic readers struggle to engage with authors, and we get a feedback loop of awkward unsure-ness

up until eeeeh two years ago id say, i kinda didnt respond to comments i got on fics. i am a supremely shy person (somehow.... idk man) so ive always been a hit and run fandom person, posting fics before i disappear (until next time). ive started replying to comments comparatively recently, as well as posting additional info on like, writing process and why i made xyz technical decision etc etc, AND i joined these semi private fandom spaces, where i mostly lurk but when i have spoons, i am there taking part in convo about my blorbos, both in my fics specifically and in broader convo. by changing the ways ive engaged with the people who read my fic, the ways people engage with *me* have changed, and i now have fairly active community around my writing despite me being on a mega hiatus due to health. ive made a number of friends because of this community ive built. its wild

similarly, i have a friend who has basically always replied to comments on their fics, leading to their comment section having a massive amount of threads full of convos about their fic, and they also have a private online space with a lot of their readers turned friends. just like. a *ton* of nerds all about the same fictional assholes causing chaos in one particular discord server no one else knows exists, way more than me because they built that community around their writing from the get go. people within their community arent all that shy about commenting, and their comment section seems to invite more people to comment than average because they ARE so engaged with their readers

op is super right about how, if we the authors want to *hear* people be exited about our fics, we have to change the way we engage with the readers of our fics. there's always gonna be people who talk about fics privately, for whatever reason, and thats okay, but you cant build a community by bitching about what you don't have. the numbers my fics do in my current fandom are absolutely staggering (and honestly freak me out a little, its a lotta pressure lol), but i get a lot of the engagement i want by just..... being open to it. i try to make it clear that i want to talk shop with my readers, that im just as excited about my writing as they are, and i celebrate the engagement i get by sharing recs and fanart, and replying to comments, and chatting with people in dms or discord, and i try to celebrate the quiet readers who kudos every one of my fics in the span of a week, and the ones who comment simply "extra kudos ♥️" to show theyve reread it, and the folks who *dont* say anything because i know, from my own reading and from a handful of comments ive gotten myself, that there are *so many people* my writing is very important to that i will never know, and that is really really cool

Listen, this isn't something I'm first-hand familiar with - the existence of these "discord channels to talk about fanfic privately" is still a Tumblr urban legend to me, and I'm half convinced it's just someone making up a guy to be mad at again - but assuming they're a real thing, I can think of plenty of reasons why people would do so other than "they hate authors." A few ideas:

Authors say kudos aren't enough, or are an insult, etc.

People say that adding your own commentary underneath someone else's art/fic post is rude.

Some people say that just using an emoji as a comment is rude.

Some people say that just saying "I like this" is rude or damning with faint praise.

Some people say that "I can't wait for the next update" is putting undue pressure on an author.

Some people say that anything less than a full paragraph of feedback is not enough.

Some people say that feedback on Tumblr isn't good enough, that it has to be on AO3.

Some people say that if you don't reblog someone on Tumblr, you're not being supportive enough, even if you do leave a comment on AO3.

Almost everyone agrees that leaving critical feedback is a bad idea, so if people want to talk about why a story doesn't work for them along with the ways it did, a private server conversation would seem logical.

Those are just the things I can think of off the top of my head. The point is, without meaning to, we've created this very confusing world in which we tell readers all the ways NOT to interact with authors, and they're all contradictory and end up making it sound like readers are expected to put nearly as much effort into feedback as authors do into writing. And that's just not realistic or sustainable.

IDK. I saw one of these posts about the still mythical reader discord servers today, and clicked on the notes and saw people complaining not about that, but about using emojis as feedback or giving two-word feedback, and I went "gee, if anyone wants an example of why readers might retreat behind closed doors, here you go."

I saw some posts last week about the conundrum of community in the fanfic world, and whether it's reasonable to expect community to be created in AO3 comments, and I still mean to reblog them when I find them in my likes again, because they were very good. I think the question of "how do we build sustainable communities" is a very good one to explore, and one that gets harder the more fragmented social media becomes. But on the author side, we're never going to solve it until we admit that (the larger) we are giving readers impossible standards to live up to, and that trying to shame them into feedback is only making it worse.

#mochi rambles #fic things #my kingdom for ao3 to add a way to 👍 comments #let me kudos the comments please #i have like -4 words at all times but i wanna show the folks who comment on my shit that i read it and loved it #pls ao3 #pls

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fangweaver2099 · 6 months ago

Text

𝐅 𝐀 𝐖 𝐍 𝐓 𝐄 𝐄 𝐓 𝐇 - CH 2 - LONELY OLD MAN

MINORS DNI 18+ FIC

You’ve always liked the idea of having a dominant partner - BDSM was something you’ve read about, watched videos about.

You’re still a virgin.

DM Request from: 10:13 PM - WebRigger2099 - “Hello, Fawn.”

College was for new experiences after all.

CW: BDSM heavy/centric fic. Safe, Sane & Consensual. Miguel is your professor, but you both don't know that. Age Gap (Y/N is 23, Miguel is mid 30's)

TAG: @slut4oscarissac23 @iamtheprincess227 @haveclayeveryday @sphynxfoxslut69 @junehasnotbeenfound @thedevaxer @bunnibitez @kodzuminx

PART 1 - PART 2 - PART 3 - CHAPTER 1 - CHAPTER 3

Miguel didn’t realize he was lonely until it all hit at once.

He'd only had Gabriella for a week before Gabriel had swooped in, claiming 'uncle rights', to steal Gabriella away for the weekend. Things had been quiet since the divorce - Tempest had Gabi for the school year, and already, he was feeling distinctly alone, all too aware of the daughter sized hole his brother had forced him cruelly and unusually into.

He was lonely. After the divorce, things had been quiet. Most of his friends had grown distant, with some vanishing and flocking to Tempest's side following their separation. Once a cheater, always a cheater, they'd proclaimed.

He hadn't even cheated on her… at least, not that time.

He was doing everything right- he had grown as a man and as a father too. He was ready to settle down, but Tempest had other plans. It was a mutual decision, best for everyone. There were no hard feelings on his end, but the pain of an empty house was new and raw. He had always lived with someone - his mother, stepfather and brother, then a roommate, then his brother as a roommate, then a string of girlfriends.

He always got the feeling Tempest never really wanted a marriage, but health insurance was too good a deal to give up. It made logical sense, even if she was hesitant at first.

She’d been involved in the kink scene since before he’d ever met her. She was polyamorous, and that had never been a problem either - he even tried it himself but decided it wasn’t for him. It was a boon, even, when he worked late into the night and Tempest needed somebody to keep her entertained.

When Gabi was born, it became more of an issue. He knew from the second he saw her that she was his , not just a daughter but his entire world, and suddenly, the idea of Tempest running around, leaving Gabriella in the hands of total strangers was… suddenly unacceptable. Eventually, he acquiesced to family babysitting, but even then, it itched.

So Webrigger2099 disappeared, logging out one day and never logging in again. He just didn’t have the time, or the interest, or, with Gabi, the desire. Besides, he was married. The archetypal family man he’d never thought he’d want to be.

But still, neither of them were happy. Tempest didn’t like being tied down, and he didn’t like the fact the mother of his child roamed late into the night dallying while he worked. It led to arguments, to stress, and, inevitably -

To divorce. Tempest was a free spirit - Miguel was not. She took Gabriella during the school year, he got her during the summer, and that was enough.

None of the phone calls or report cards she’d sent would make it easier to cope with the loneliness.

Years later, and the big house began to feel cavernous, more a church to the worship of solitary confinement than a home. No daughter, no wife, no family, just himself, online papers to grade, and the week old takeout container of Chinese he’d been steadily avoiding eating.

On a whim, he’d logged back into the account, and there, he’d found… Fawn. Local to the area - and wearing a black facemask in every photo you took. You were beautiful.

Things had gone great. He was having fun. He wasn’t ready for romance, sure, but a man had needs.

He didn’t need to see any more than your eyes to be hooked, but the rest was icing on the cake. Now that he had seen your lips he was even more charmed, despite the circumstances.

You were genuine, a little bit awkward but sweet and eager. Like a virgin, unsure of yourself and needing guidance by a firm but caring hand. And god, you trusted him off the bat.

That power could have been abused easily, and he even warned you as much. Strange men online were not the most trustworthy souls, him least of all. You were his pet, after all, and it was his responsibility to make sure you knew how to tell good from bad.

You were clearly not that experienced, not in sex or in dynamics. You needed guidance on how to touch yourself properly, even. He knew your body better than yourself and that wasn’t exactly something he wanted to pass on to your next dom. Better you learned with his teaching what you wanted and needed.

Maybe he had gotten more attached than he liked to admit, protective of you. It wasn’t like he could keep you to himself forever, as fun as that might have been, but still, he found himself looking forward to your messages.

You were the only one he had ever really felt that way about, to be perfectly honest with himself. Getting married to Tempest was a necessity because of the baby, and sure he loved her, but the cracks began showing quickly into the pregnancy.

Not you, you seemed to want what he wanted. Nothing too serious, long-term not permanent, but still intimate.

It wasn’t fair.

(Nothing in his life was ever fair.)

Miguel’s hands steepled in front of him, a single bead of sweat running down his brow. He was hard as diamonds, but his stomach churned with sickness. This was not a development he was expecting.

The ticking clock on the wall was the only noise in Miguel’s office, and he was thankful he couldn’t hear his own heartbeat in his ears.

He prayed he was wrong - there were well over eight million people in NYC and over fifteen different colleges, maybe you just had a similar tattoo.. And.. build… and hair color… Yeah, that seemed likely.

You stupid fuck , he cursed himself.

It seemed like he just couldn’t stop losing.

Divorced at 32, a mother that hated him, a tense relationship with his brother, a tenser relationship with his biological father.

And a little girl he only had custody of during the summer.

This job was supposed to get him away from the stress that came with working at corporate HQ.

This job was supposed to make everything easier. His two escapes - this job and Fawn - were about to implode all at once.

His phone sat in front of him, mocking him for his paralyzed fear. It should have been simple to check, to compare the tattoos and bikini and write it off as a mistake. Or… maybe he didn’t want to even consider the possibility that he had been sexting with one of his new students for three months, much less what he would do if that was the case.

Fawn would have noticed by now, right? Anonymity sending pictures had its limits and he knew he had an imposing physique. If you were Fawn - you’d surely notice. You’d bring it up, right?

(Then again, college girls weren’t exactly the most perceptive people.)

You - Fawn didn’t seem like the STEM type, had to be something artsy . Right?

Miguel was a lapsed Catholic and yet he found himself praying that he was wrong.

A much worse possibility crept into his mind. You knew, and you liked this turn of events. You didn’t seem like the malicious sort, not interested in blackmailing him for a good grade, but maybe it was some fucked up kink thing. The power dynamic was there, the secretiveness it necessitated, the wrongness of it all. Intentional or not, if word got out your position here was gone.

Besides, Fawn was twenty-three .

She couldn’t be a freshman in her second year. The 4.0 GPA and high marks in your last semester didn’t hint at someone who had to repeat introductory classes.

Or Fawn lied about her age.

That would be even worse.

This was all some terrible mistake. Maybe her tattoo was a tik tok trend of some kind, he would even settle for it being a mark of membership for a cult. Anything was better than the alternative.

Still, Miguel stared at the dark phone screen in his hands. He had ten minutes at most before class started and he had to get to the bottom of this before then.

He snatched the phone with urgency, scrolling quickly through his messages in a frantic search.

He found himself enlarging the image Fawn sent the last evening, just in her bikini. His eyes focused on her arm and that teary-eyed fawn laid down in a bed of grayscale roses.

Miguel was a scientist, he worked through logical conclusions. It was simple inductive reasoning. The placement was the same, even the framed roses.

You and Fawn had similar eyes, similar eye color, similar skin tone - but Fawn’s pictures were always a bit dark or cloudy, her phone was far from new, so the darker skin tone would make sense, right? But you were wearing glasses today, he swore that he’d never seen Fawn wearing glasses.

He placed down the phone for a moment, running his hands over his face with a panicked sigh, trying to keep himself calm. He was so deeply fucked. Contact lenses were used by all sorts of people, and glasses could fog up with a mask on or ruin photos from the flash.

How the fuck had he not noticed? It’d been almost three weeks .

Here, Miguel thought everything was looking good. In truth he adored Fawn. Her companionship, friendship? …Pethood? He didn’t need to really figure that out right now - it was something he enjoyed.

Despite his reservations that she - young and inexperienced - would instantly take his feelings to her as romantic she seemed no problem drawing the line in the sand.

She was perfect , it’s why he wanted to meet her.

Now she might be you .

His student.

One who he was pretty sure despised him.

You never even bothered to ask questions, you sat by Taylor while she stared daggers into him every lesson. Your work was middling at best and you liked to cut corners.

Fawn wouldn’t do that, right ?

He had to get to the bottom of this, right now. Miguel was a good man, he took care of his daughter, he watched over his kinda-niece. He contributed to the community - he took care of people.

Miguel was not the kind of man to sext with one of his students.

Not on purpose, anyway , he thought grimly, slinking into his chair as he fought the urge to hurl.

No. This was fixable, confirmable. He’d just ask you to talk after class. Quick, easy. Confirm you had a twin who he just happened to find online.

(The whole point of Miguel’s anonymity was to protect himself, not fuck himself over.)

And if it was you? Well he couldn’t reveal it was him, surely. He would have to make an excuse as Web, some reason that he had to stop talking to her.

Maybe Web died getting hit by a bus.

He opened the phone again with a click, scrolling through the media tab. He considered for a moment sending fawn a message. He didn’t know what college she went to, or her class schedule.

He saw that the last time she was on Telegram was an hour ago, she hadn’t checked in since then.

He glanced up at the time on his phone. 8:58.

He took a deep breath, counting to 10 and then tossing his phone back in his bag. It took him a moment to stand and fix the collar of his shirt before he walked back down the hall to his classroom.

The hall was full, students looking exhausted or unamused was something Miguel was used to.

It was very hard to not stare at you - sitting in the back of the class, half your body hidden by your laptop wearing a dour expression. You were far enough back your features were mostly nondescript.

Miguel didn’t particularly like teaching, it was technically his ‘hobby’. It wasn’t hard outside of the students. He didn’t do well talking to large rooms but hey - that was fine. He was technically a headhunter for Alchemax after all.

Right now teaching was awful . Miguel wanted to be anywhere but here and found himself randomly pausing during the lecture. Luckily everyone was too tired to notice.

How on earth was he supposed to even proceed? He had invested himself in you, two almost three months of talking and flirting, finally finding someone that had similar interests and intentions.

If he had known before, seen you the first day of class after already meeting, he could simply help you sign up for another class and they’d never see each other again.

It would all end there, too awkward to continue.

Now, it was more complicated.

He couldn’t meet in the summers because he had Gabriella, and she was far more important than a fun fling. He had a responsibility for his daughter, and he made the most out of his time with her as fleeting as it was.

The summer, and a few weekends here and there during the school semester. It was the perfect set up, one that allowed him to dip his toes back into the scene and find a little companionship and fun.

Nothing too serious, of course. Not yet.

He couldn’t just continue things as they were. She had been in his class too long, and if she transferred now there would be questions before it was allowed. How would he explain it to the department lead?

Jess wasn’t exactly pleased with what students thought of him as it was.

The news of him fucking one of his students would be the nail in the coffin before sending him back to Alchemax with his head held down in shame.

He did have the advantage that he - technically - wasn’t fucking Fawn.

He needed to talk to you.

The rest of class went… as normal as it could. As normal as him occasionally seeing your bored face as you typed away notes of what he was explaining. He forgot to ask if anyone had questions again before he clicked off the powerpoint.

He’d pull you aside the moment you walked past him, call you over. Easy. Quick. Just a conversation and then hopefully it was all one big mistake and you’d be off to whatever you did at 11AM on a Monday.

Problem. When you stood, both of the students you always sat with rose with you. The black-haired woman even interlocked her arm with yours. You were smiling and chatting away with the rude, redheaded one who was easily a head shorter than you.

When you finally turned to leave, Miguel cleared his throat. You and your two friends stopped. The redhead frowned. Your eyes widened for a moment.

He said your name, which only made your surprised expression worse. Miguel was grimacing. “I need to-”

Suddenly, a sugar-sweet voice called your name, Taylor, and Babette. Everyone glanced over at the door to - Aurora.

Miguel’s brows raised.

“We gotta go, I left Kore with the car running!” She practically skipped into the room to you and Babette in the squealing, touchy way college girls always seemed to enact upon seeing their friends. Babette practically screeched and pulled Aurora into a hug.

“Oh- Uncle Miggy!” Aurora exclaimed after releasing Babette. Babette and you gasped and looked over at Miguel.

There was no way. He didn’t say anything, stunned into silence. Aurora - his ex wife’s niece… cousin… thing. He wasn’t entirely sure. He had known the girl since she was 13. She was Gabriella's babysitter most of the time… and… somehow... your friend.

You grinned at Aurora as she took the other place at your side, hooking her arm around yours and waving goodbye. She was practically pulling you and Babette out of the room, Taylor trailing behind with their hands in their pockets.

So. Miguel was left standing there - alone, dumbfounded. It was only getting worse. Much worse. He walked back to his office in silence, an unblinking, thousand-yard stare ignoring Professor Parker as he tried to flag Miguel on the way inside, the door shutting hard behind him.

He sat, sinking into his chair, and flipped his phone open. Clicking open the browser, he opened up Aurora’s instagram. That’s what the kids used for all their social media nowadays, right? He had been told about it by his ex-wife and… ex sister-in-law, part of his ‘job’ is keeping an eye on Aurora. While they expected him to monitor her, the truth was he checked in once or twice a semester to see if she was still alive. She had his number for emergencies, and he kept his hands off. It was a good system, one he didn’t have to think about.

Kids could take care of themselves… Kids. Fawn was practically a kid, a young twenty something that had her whole life ahead of her.

God. Was he a pervert?

Miguel pinched the bridge of his nose as he scrolled through Aurora’s page. Just as he expected, the screen was littered with photos of you.

On campus, at restaurants, at an apartment with you, both of you in your pajamas. Miguel swore you saw a picture that peeked into your bedroom, a familiar sight from your photos.

You weren’t just one of her friends - you were her roommate .

Miguel took a deep breath, fussing with his dark hair as he checked the time on his phone. He had to be at Alchemax by now. So despite the anxiety curdling his gut, Miguel made his way out of the college building.

Driving had always been a comfort for Miguel, his mind half shutting off and relying on pure instinct as he saw the world flash quickly to his sides. Usually he didn’t think of much anything at all while he drove, taking it as a quiet moment amid the chaos of his responsibilities.

There was too much going on to relax like that. He felt sick as he drove, chest tight and stomach churning. Every relationship he had ever had with a woman seemed to crash and burn, romantic or otherwise. His long list of exes, his mother, now you. Would Gabriella be next, another casualty of his inevitable fuck-ups?

Miguel had really liked - still liked - you. The thing you two had was good, was fun and casual. There were no big expectations. No hard feelings about him having other priorities.

This was easier until it wasn’t.

Was it even possible for something like this to work out? He didn’t want to lose you, but it seemed like the only option as the complications stacked up.

He sat with this feeling through the whole ride, and well into his shift at the lab. He tried to pour over the plans in front of him, the techs trying to explain their work while he was gone… But he was obviously distracted.

“Is this a bad time, Dr. O’Hara?” His assistant chimed, a concerned look on her face as she tipped her head curiously. She had been talking to him for a minute at least, but only when he heard his name did he snap into momentary focus.

The woman in front of him had worked closely with Miguel for years, a reliable if quirky sort some years his junior. Her heart-shaped glasses were hardly fitting in with uniform regulations, but it's not like she was handling chemicals. Not now, anyway.

She was probably the closest thing to what he would call a friend, and he really didn’t want to call Parker a friend even if he was a man of honor at Peter’s wedding. She was better at respecting boundaries.

“Sorry, no. Just a… Headache today. Can you repeat that, Lyla?” He shifted his attention to her as best he could, rubbing his eyes and rolling his shoulders. The doctors told him he needed to stop staying so tense all the time, to release the pressure in his shoulders. It was almost painful when he let them slump, but the shock was probably the only thing keeping him alert.

“I’ll type it up in an email, it’s not that important. You look like shit.” The brunette sighed, shaking her head disapprovingly. She was never one to talk fluff. It was part of why he liked her so much.

An email. A text. No, this was too important to type to her. He would have to wait til the next class.

Besides, What if he was wrong? How would he explain that to Fawn? She was already a bit nervous and new to all this.

Just as the door clicked behind her Miguel heard a ping at his phone, a familiar username popping into view.

“Off to the shore now. I’ll make sure to take pics :3” - Fawnteeth - 12:05 PM

#miguel spiderverse #miguel o'hara #miguel x reader

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luguangs · 1 year ago

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hi everyone, i'm so glad to be back!!!

so just to give you guys an update on what happened—my account was suspended for almost a whole month.

basically it was just staff holding my account hostage for no real reason ;A; and the result was that my blog appeared deactivated, all of my posts vanished from the tags, asks i sent got eaten by tumblr, and all my dms disappeared during that time.

(to clarify: apparently it was for having too many urls? but most of them were actually active which was weird? and then staff took forever to reply to my emails only to finally be like "here's the list of urls you need to delete or we'll terminate your account forever (:" and the list was just. urls of either actually active group sideblogs or sideblogs i'm not even an admin of and couldn't physically delete even if i wanted to so. i was basically stuck in limbo for a good while until staff finally listened to reason.)

i've spent a lot of time and care curating my blog over the years, as well as building friendships with a lot of wonderful people i've met here—and to have it all suddenly taken away was a really scary experience. these past few weeks i've just been worrying about what would happen if my account got suddenly deleted for good.

still, i'm so thankful that i was able to keep in touch with several of you through discord!

even so, several friends reached out asking me if i blocked them and whether they had done something wrong which is just heartbreaking to me—i'm truly so sorry if anyone thought i blocked them for even a second, it just makes me so sad to think about.

this is the main reason why i just wanted to explain a bit what happened to hopefully clear up any possible misunderstandings.

i really hope nothing like this happens again, but just in case— you can also find me on anilist here (i've been slowly trying to get the hang of it lmao) and mutuals are always free to ask for my discord!

also, thank you to everyone who still kept tagging me in their lovely edits! i'm still tracking #usernikiforova btw, i'm really sorry for the delay if anyone thought i stopped reblogging them! i swear i felt like i was looking sadly through a window at all your beautiful creations but being unable to reblog them ;-; just a heads up that it will probably take me a couple of days to catch up with all the posts but i promise i'll reblog all of them as soon as i can!

and finally, i really want to say a HUGE thank you to everyone who was able to reach out to me asking if i was okay and expressing your support—i was honestly so touched to receive your messages and you have no idea how much it meant to me to not feel so alone going through this. ily all so much <3

mutuals, if u could interact w this post just to make sure you've seen it i'd really appreciate it! also, please bear with me as i'll probably rb this a few times just to try to get the word out

[clawing my way out of my coffin already half-buried in the ground] I'M BACK

#again tysm everyone and also HI i missed u all sm ;-;#btw i've been told that apparently tumblr made some ppl unfollow me but i'm still showing up on their dash?#just as an fyi bc it might be a glitch #(also i used bolding to hopefully make this a bit easier to read since it got a bit long)#gabby speaks #again i'll try to catch up on my tracking tag as soon as i can!!#pls be patient w me bc tumblr deleted my entire queue ;A; so i have to go back and queue everything again where i left off #and i had literally just queued like 100+ posts just before my acct got suspended OTL

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lostcauses-noregrets · 2 years ago

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Hello Lost. I am sad: my fanfics do not receive comments and I am losing the will to write eruri. I know we write for ourselves and that is beautiful, but at the same time, it is nice to know what people think and if they are enjoying our fanfics. I do not want to ask people to leave more comments, it is their choice, but I wish I could find a way to encourage readers. I do not care if it is one comment or hundreds, just one opinion coming from someone’s heart will be enough to me. Do you have some kind of advice, please? Thank you,

Hello Anon, I’m so sorry you’re sad, but I do understand. No matter how often I encourage people to write for themselves and to be proud of their own creativity, there’s no denying that it is disappointing when you pour your heart and soul into a piece of writing and it gets no reaction. I feel that way myself sometimes, when I post a piece that I’m particularly fond of and it just gets crickets. It’s impossible not to feel a little despondent.

Sadly you’re not the only one who's experiencing this. I’ve seen several surveys about fandom engagement and it seems that comments are drying up right across the board. There are many reasons for this, but most of them boil down to the changing nature of fandom platforms and communities. Twitter is a particularly bad platform for fandom engagement; it’s hard to build and sustain a community on such a public platform, it’s so fast moving that content disappears quickly and there’s a high probability that people will never see it, it’s hard to re-surface content after the timeline has moved on, and the click through rate is abysmal. Also because AO3 is an archive, rather than a social media platform, it was never designed to sustain community on the platform. Quite the opposite in fact, there was always an assumption that fandom communities would exist elsewhere, and that AO3 would archive the content created by those communities.

There has also been increasing commodification of fandom creativity. Some fans seem to approach fanfic with the same expectations as published fiction, without taking into account that all fanfiction is a voluntary labour of love, rather than the result of a commercial contractual agreement between author and publisher. This sometimes leads to a mismatch in expectations between readers and writers; writers hope for comments and feedback, while readers expect regular updates, and more often than not everyone ends up a little disappointed.

There’s no easy way to solve these problems so it’s really important to remember that lack of engagement is absolutely no reflection on the quality of your writing. I can’t stress this too often.

There are things you can do though! One of which is to find your own fandom community. In my experience fandom is *always* best experienced with a small group of like-minded weirdos who share your specific niche headcanons about your favourite characters. Discord is a good space for small fandom communities, if you can gather together a small group of fandom friends, you can set up your own server with people who hopefully will be only too happy to comment on your writing. There’s also an Eruri writing discord which I’ve heard great things about. It sounds like a really creative and supportive space. @RookSacrifice over on twitter is one of the mods and has passed on an invitation to the server for you. If you DM me, I’ll give it to you. Also don’t ever be afraid to ask for feedback! Try reaching out directly to other writers and readers. If you hook up with another writer, you can even offer to exchange comments on your work. Something else I’ve suggested in the past is getting involved in ship weeks and challenges. That can be a great way to encourage fans to engage with your writing. Though tbh there are so many ship weeks running these days that I have no idea what sort of engagement they get. Still worth a try though!

I hope this helps Anon, please don’t feel too despondent. Eruri is such a fabulous ship with so much nuance to explore in Erwin and Levi’s characters and relationship, it would be such a shame if you stopped writing. And please do DM me so I can pass on that Discord link.

#asks #eruri #writing #fandom #snk

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chisiuwu · 2 years ago

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sorry for disappearing from here, i'm still drawing but i kind of took a break from social media some weeks ago and i didn't bother to update tumblr. i will come back and post my latest drawings soon, but i probably won't read dms, reblogs, notes or asks for a while. maybe months. a friend showed me my inbox messages (i was too anxious to open them myself--) and most of them were nice, so thank you for supporting me, it genuinely means a lot that you took the time to write nice words and reach out to me; to the person who asked me to tag more properly certain arts, i will take your critique into consideration too

if you follow me in other social media, you probably already noticed i disabled notifications, replies and dms, and it seems that i'm pretty much unreachable. i don't particularly enjoy it either, but this is better than having strangers making me uncomfortable – i said it on twitter but, fandom drama* apart, i'm not a very social person and comments are a bit overwhelming now that my art is popular (⁠´⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠.̫⁠ ⁠.⁠ ⁠`⁠) i do appreciate every single good reply i get, but twitter and instagram (especially twitter) are very hostile towards art, in the sense that it gets seen for only 5 seconds and people act either like the artist won't read what they have to say or like they need to please people's desires. the good thing is that i'm not a very emotional person either and now that the Big Thing is over i can just relax and enjoy the very few interactions i get from my mutuals and friends

(*the fandom drama in question was adressed in a twitter thread i don't regret making even though it got blown out of proportion. i said what i said and i thought about it very carefully before posting it)

the reason i'm spilling my thoughts here is precisely because tumblr posts survive better than tweets or whatever the hell insta stories are. i can freely say what i need to say not having to adjust my words into a certain format. for example, i wanted to remind everyone that i'm not mad over people who unfollowed or broke the mutual for whatever reason. especially if you're an artist and we kind of got along, i genuinely hold no resentment and it'd be okay for me to interact again (except if you subtweeted me in that case k1ll y0urself). i also ran a chainblock extension on google chrome that basically blocked every quote i had on certain tweets, or people retweeting tweets calling me out. i have literally zero memory of who said what, and if you either got caught up or you have changed your mind and want to get unblocked, you can try to get in contact with any of my mutuals to tell me! last thing i want to say is a bit obvious, but i ever create something that makes anyone uncomfortable, i can't care less about being unfollowed over it. i am educated enough to understand what kind of impact my art has, and if anything i ever did was truly hurtful, my friends would tell me. i am just drawing anime lesbians

so, if you've read this far: 1) i won't stop making art, don't worry about me because i will come back and i am also one of the very few mentally stable lgbt people in the world 2) it always makes me incredibly happy to connect with others through my works, and i'm very thankful towards every person that has ever left a positive impact on my life, even towards those who are silently following for any reason they may have. i hope you are all having a nice day ♡

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popi-the-fatui · 4 years ago

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CHILDE BF HCs

(that no one asked for but here they are anyways)

A/N: this man needs some luv. Long post, there is a whole iceberg under the “read more”. Also, I tried to keep a Gender Neutral reader so pls DM me if there are any mistakes!!

TW: DESCRIPTION OF AN ANXIETY ATTACK, SPOILERS FOR THE REX LAPIS QUEST AND CHILDE’S PAST, a little bit of angst

🐋 Let’s bust some myths first: contrary to popular belief, Childe has no experience at relationships or intimacy at all. Non. Cero. The Venn diagram of romantic/intimate stuff and things Childe has done is a void. But it’s not that he doesn’t want to, it’s just that he hasn’t had the time to experience any of these things because he is a busy man: between fighting, training and being a Harbinger, there is not a minute left for him to indulge in other things.

🐋 The problem with this is that Tartaglia is a people’s person. He WANTS to be able to have someone that he can do these things with. At the end of the day, when he comes home tired after a mission, all he wants is someone to be waiting for him with cuddles, hugs, kisses, reassurance, caresses, or just a simple “how did your day go?” Because of this, he has a lot of pent-up love that he has not been able to give.

🐋 In that note, he is also incredibly touch-starved: not only does he want someone to give that love to, but Childe also craves to receive it. When was the last time he was touched by someone in a context that was not a fight? He loves fighting, obviously: he has trained for a big part of his life to be able to defeat everything and everyone. But he is also just a human, and there are limits to how long a person can go without a loving touch.

🐋 So when he finally falls victim to the first signs of infatuation, this poor whale man will have an internal battle: do I reach for them? Would they be better off if they never meet me? Will they accept me? Has my reputation already ruined this for me before it even began? How do I approach them? Do I look presentable? Am I going to scare them away? Childe will be torn between wanting to protect you from himself (as the Fatui business is not an easy pill to swallow for everyone) and protect himself from you (his heart would not handle rejection/disgust very well), and wanting to KISS YOU AND HUG YOU AND KNOW MORE ABOUT YOU BECAUSE ARGH WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO ADORABLE.

🐋 So he finally decides to compromise between these two stances, and let YOU decide whether you want him as a friend, a lover or a stranger. He starts greeting you whenever he sees you in the streets, subtly asking if you would like him to join you in your commissions, inviting you for lunch/dinner after a mission so you can recharge your energy, asking if you want to go and share drinks with him and Zhongli. You know, friendly stuff friends do. And he doesn’t even try to hide the happy smile that escapes him whenever you say yes to him: when it comes to you, there is nothing he needs to hide. Well, except for that one thing.

🐋 He knows that you know he is somehow associated with the Fatui, if his constant trips to the Northland Bank aren’t enough to tell. Usually, Childe dislikes going around things as he much rather hit straight to the point (being the point a fight, a deal or just a simple conversation). But he has grown so addicted to the sensations you make him feel that he can’t help but to try to postpone that tiny little detail about himself for later. He has never had anyone who genuinely wants to spend time with him and that can keep up with him. Childe knows he can be quite intense and that rumors about him aren’t really rumors but WARNINGS, and to finally have someone, even if you’re just friends, that is actively trying to get to know the real him means so much, and he doesn’t want to let that go as selfish as he knows it is because there’s a chance you could get hurt (emotionally and physically).

🐋 Unfortunately for him, everything that goes up must go down, and that fateful day comes when his plans to take Rex Lapis’ Gnosis blows back to him. After that brief, tense conversation with La Signora and Zhongli, Childe’s ego can’t be any lower: it’s not often that he loses, and much less often that he loses while feeling like a fool. He wants to scream, fight, punch, kick. Anything to take out the impotence and anger he is feeling right now.

🐋 You found him in this state while you were looking for him to see if he was alright because a WHOLE ASS PALACE JUST FELL FROM THE SKY and you’re very concerned for him as you haven’t had any news directly from him and all you know is that apparently Childe was the cause of it?

🐋 As soon as he sees you, his blood-lust disappears and he no longer wants to fight something: he wants to cry from shame. Shame at being found in this state. Shame at failing. Shame at what you would think of him now that the cat’s out of the bag because from the look in your face is EVIDENT that now you know how far his relationship with the Fatui goes.

🐋 He falls to the ground, tears finally coming out and he is crying ugly sobs while hiccuping nonsense about how he is a weak, pathetic, disgusting failure and it’s not fair it’s not FAIR IT’S NOT FAIR IT’S NOT-

🐋 “Look at me” you softly call to him, but he is panicking and hyperventilating and not responding to anything that’s outside of his head, so you decide to sit on your knees in front of him, gently cupping his face with your hands, caressing his tears away with your thumbs.

🐋 “Childe, look at me. Please?” You try again, carefulness in your tone as to not startle him. And when he finally reacts and looks up, you don’t see Tartaglia the 11th Harbinger, nor Childe the fatui flirt. All you see is a broken man that carries the weight of the world on his shoulders, exhausted from constantly fighting against everything the world has thrown at him, and your heart aches for him and wonders how long this man has suffered alone, how long has he suffered in silence.

🐋 “It’s okay, Childe. You’re okay. Can you breathe for me?” You position yourself behind him and put your hands on his shoulders, rubbing circles with your fingers to further calm him. “Breath with me, yeah just like that. Now hold it for a bit and then release it. Keep going, I’ll do it with you. I’m here”

🐋 Childe finds himself finding it easier to breathe with each inhale and exhale, and when he is finally going down from his high, catharsis hits him HARD. Is this what he has been missing all of his life? Is releasing all that pent-up frustration supposed to feel this good? And he feels a little selfish, because he knows he doesn’t deserve your comfort after the stunt he pulled, but Childe can’t help but become putty under your tender touches and your soft words, and he wishes for a different context, for a different past in which he never fell into the abyss, never joined the Fatui, never felt that the only way to survive was to fight. Instead, he wishes for a past in which he is traveling because he wants to, and he meets you, and he courts you and makes your cheeks heat up at something he said. And you are not touching him because he had a panic crisis that he himself caused. No, he imagines the both of you after a dinner date in Liyue. The sky is dark and the stars are shining but the streets are still full of people laughing and talking and the light from the lamps are reflecting beautifully in your hair. You are walking near the harbor, and you are holding his hand and he is giving you a kiss on your forehead because he can’t help himself. In another life, he would have found you and loved you the way you deserve and the way he needs.

🐋 But he knows that now is too late, and all he has left is a mind full of regret because he did, in fact, hurt you. How could you trust him after this? How could you WANT him after this? So imagine his surprise when the first thing that comes out of your mouth is a soft “Are you ok now, Childe?”

🐋 “I- how- what?” He mutters in disbelief. Why are YOU asking HIM that? Shouldn’t it be the other way around?

🐋 “You had me very worried back there. I thought you would stop breathing at any moment. You are not hurt, are you?”

🐋 And he laughs. A high-pitched, almost maniac laugh. “You know I was the cause of all of…” he says, moving his arms to signal, well, everywhere “...this, right? I believe you now must know what my real business in Liyue was, and that I’m not just some random Fatui officer”

🐋 “Well… I kind of suspected it? How many ‘random Fatui officers’ are carrying a Vision, huge amounts of Mora and have so many ‘meetings’ at the Northland Bank with the Qixing themselves? I mean, I didn’t know you were a Harbinger, but I did know that you were a higher up in the organization. I’m not dumb, you know?” you answer light-heartedly.

🐋 “Then why would you keep hanging out with me? If you knew all of that, then you for sure must have known that people tend to keep me in a ‘do not trust’ list. People are wary around me, and they should! If you knew of the things I’ve seen, the things I’ve DONE. The reputation surrounding the Fatui, especially the Harbingers, wasn’t built on nothing, you know?”

🐋 “Don’t get me wrong. I do have somewhat of an idea of the things you do for a living. And let me be clear: I certainly do not condone it. And to be honest, I know that things between us would be easier if you weren’t a Fatui and I actually wish you weren’t one” you can feel how his whole body deflated at that, and even if you are sitting behind him, you just know he has a pout on his face, so you resolve for hugging him from behind and rest the side of your face between his shoulder blades, and continue.

🐋 “But in the past weeks, I also had the opportunity to get to know you. Not Fatui you. But human you. I know that you have a family that you love very much and you do everything in your power to protect them. I know that you haven’t had it easy, and that some scars you have still hurt. I know that you absolutely can’t eat with chopsticks, but your pride refuses to give up and you try anyway. I know that you’re a passionate man that holds his dearest people close to his heart. I know that you hate when I’m sad so you’re willing to make a fool of yourself if that means I’ll end up laughing. I know how you wait outside of my building until my window lights up after you get me home so you are sure nothing happened to me. I know by the way you sometimes disassociate from the world around you that you are thinking of home and returning to your family” as you speak, you feel something wet falling on your upper arms, and realize that Childe is silently crying. You have half a mind to stop, but you also know that he needs to hear this, so you tighten your hug a little in reassurance.

🐋 “I also know that whenever I see you with a new wound, I can’t help but worry for you and my first instinct is to check if you are okay. I’m now familiar with the way my heart skips a beat whenever I get to see one of your genuine smiles, especially when the reason behind them is that you get to spend some time with me. I know my eyes soften when I see you talking about something you’re passionate about. The truth is, I care for you, Childe. I really do, Fatui or not. Harbinger or not. And yes, while I would rather you not be one, I still can’t help but long for your company because you make me happy. Because I love you. So don’t underestimate me. I’m strong and so are my feelings. You being a Fatui is not gonna change that”. After this, you two sit in silence for a few minutes, but it’s not an awkward one despite your confession. You know he is gathering his thoughts so you move one of your arms that is wrapped around Childe’s torso to card your fingers through his hair, mindful of the knots that had appeared after the battle. If he doesn’t believe your words, then you sure hope he trusts your actions.

🐋 Childe is the one who breaks the silence when he asks “How could you possibly love someone like me?”. If you weren’t sitting that close to him, you wouldn’t have heard it. He says this so softly, so gently, almost as if he was trying to convince himself and not you.

🐋 “Silly boy” you laugh warmly. “Did you hear anything I just said?” You ruffle his hair, and finally, FINALLY, you can hear him giggle a little. “You don’t get to decide who I love. That’s my choice, and I choose to love you”

🐋 No kisses were shared that day. No grand, magnificent romantic gestures were made. Only the silent promise of two young lovers to love and cherish each other as they were. And maybe, just maybe, you could work things out, together, to build yourselves a brighter future.

🐋 So after all has been said and done: congrats! You are now the proud s/o of Teyvat’s biggest simp.

🐋 Childe is your number one fan. Everything you do is carefully recorded in his mind for later use. He has to go on a mission away from you? Be prepared to be pampered and being taken on several dates the previous week so this clingy man has something to hold on to.

🐋 Also: he is shameless. He will not be afraid of making out with you in plain daylight on a busy street. But fear not! If you happen to not be a fan of PDA, he will try to be low-profile. You are, afterall, a person he treasures and can’t live without, so your comfort comes before his needs. Now, I say “try” because he will still demand to hold your hand and give you the random kiss on your cheek.

🐋 HUGS. FROM. BEHIND. Watch him giving you hugs like Oprah. You are buying something? Cooking? Chilling? Expect to feel a pair of long limbs wrapping from behind you in a tight hug like a koala. It’s his hourly vibe check.

🐋 Very jealous and protective of you. He is very afraid that one day you’ll realize there are plenty of people better than him and you’ll leave him, so please remind this simp that he is more than enough for you.

🐋 He also has nightmares from the time he spent in the abyss and will take sometime for him to realize that he is no longer there, so give him a few minutes for him to come to his senses and then please for the love of the Tsaritsa cuddle the life out of him. Also on this note, I have the headcanon that he prefers being the little spoon. That, or facing each other and he rests his face in the crook of your neck while leaving little pecks there.

🐋 Also you discover, to your surprise and as stated at the beginning , that this man has absolutely no idea how to do relationships. To compensate for this and to give you only the best of the best (as you deserve), he spends time in his travels to read romantic novels to have an idea of what to do, so don’t be surprised if he says or does something corny or cringey.

🐋 The most chaotic “meet the family” you’ll ever have. As soon as he takes you to Snezhnaya, you will have all of his siblings running and tackling you into a bear hug (he sends A LOT of letters to his family about you and if you read them you would not be sure if he is talking about you or a deity).

🐋 He also tries to keep you out of anything regarding the Fatui. It’s a relief that you finally know about how deep his person runs in the organization, but he also wants to spare you from the details of what he does unless something is really bothering him.

🐋 All in all, this golden retriever is your biggest hype man and the most loyal boyfriend. You will never get bored with Childe, as everyday is an adventure with him and he will make sure you to make you as happy and loved as you make him feel.

#childe #childe x reader #tartaglia #tartaglia x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin #genshin impact #mine #tw axiety #tw anxiety attack #genshin spoilers #genshin impact spoilers

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darkficsyouneveraskedfor · 4 years ago

Text

More than just a game

Warnings: dark elements including noncon and rape, oral, fingering, doxxing, stalking, and other explicit content.

This is dark!Jake Jensen and explicit. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You find a new gaming buddy but he sees you as more than that.

Note: So this is my first Jake Jensen fic and it was lots of fun so let me know what you think and hope you enjoy. :D

Thank you. Love you guys!

As always, if you can, please leave some feedback, like and reblog <3

Special shout-out to @navybrat817 for helping me with this idea

After too many nights scrolling through subreddits and searching for something to keep you distracted, you decided to bite the hook. Several other redditors agreed to hop on Minecraft and it had been a while since you logged in. You missed the almost relaxing ritual of mining and building.

You joined the chat, quick to hit the little microphone emblem as you listened to the voices in your headset. You learned long ago to keep your mic muted on the servers, especially with strangers. The last time you dared to speak up as a woman in a game chat, your DMs had become so overwhelmed you deleted and started a new account on Discord and changed your ID on Steam.

You were all given your tasks as players called out coordinates and you kept to chopping up the side of a mountain. You mostly worked alone, chatting through text instead of voice chat. As you placed a crafting table in your little mine, another player, JJ-Smooth, popped up and dropped some iron for you.

He stayed close but you didn’t mind. A lot of players tried to work together the deeper they got and you were used to it. As you uncovered some lava, he dumped water before you could get burned and helped you hack up the obsidian.

He thanked you on the voice chat but you knew any courtesy in return would earn you the attention of the entire server. So you dropped some gold for him and went on your way.

“I hear a zombie,” he warned.

You turned to hack up the undead before it could get you, only to be shot by a skeleton hidden on the next level. Another appeared and you died before you could hide, the bony villain killed by your ally as you watched your possession scatter over the death screen.

“Hey, I got your stuff,” he said as you loaded back up, “I’ll find you.”

You typed quickly in the chat, ‘sorry, mic busted, give me your coordinates and I’ll come to you.’

You waited as ‘JJ-Smooth is typing…’ appeared at the bottom and finally he sent the numbers. You hopped over the blocky hills and through the forests until you found the mine again. He was just outside and handed over all your tools and ration. He headed back into the mine and you followed him. This time, you began your own path in the opposite direction.

Before you knew it, you’d lost track of time. You sat back as you realised it was only you and JJ on the server. The silence should have tipped you off earlier. He was the host and you felt super awkward for staying so long. You typed that you were logging off for the night and thanked him.

You hit the keyboard with your knuckle and yawned as you opened the screen,

“God, it’s late,” you muttered.

“Hello?” he said.

Your eyes rounded as you looked at the mic symbol and the lack of red line made you cringe. You’d hit an extra button without noticing.

“Um, hi, sorry, I just--”

“Mic busted, huh?” he asked.

“No, I--” you didn’t know what to say, “anyways, I should--”

“So, you’re a chick? Is that why you mute?”

“Uh, well, it’s just… easier, sorry, I--” even if you weren’t trying to hide from gamer dudes, you weren’t the best at conversation.

“A gamer girl, nice,” he said and you sighed, “sorry, that sounded weird, didn’t it?”

“Mhmm,” you touched your bottom lip as you cupped your chin, “it’s late, I have to work tomorrow.”

“You comin’ back?” he asked, almost hopeful.

“I don’t know--”

“I won’t tell anyone,” he said abruptly, “promise, lips sealed.”

“I really don’t know if I can do this too much, I usually work early mornings so… yeah,” you said.

“I get it but you know you’re always welcome, hope you don’t mind if I send you an invite now and then. No pressure,” he offered.

“Uh, sure,” you shrugged, “okay, yeah, good night.”

You left the chat quickly and pulled off your headset. Shit.

‘I’m Jake by the way,’ a pm popped up, ‘gg.’

You typed back, ‘gg, it was fun’ and quickly logged out. You sat back and rubbed your eyes. Well, he didn’t seem like a total creep, maybe just a bit awkward but so were you. You shut down for the night and stretched out as you switched off the lamp. You were going to pay for your session in the morning.

🎮

A few nights later you got an invite to the server. You debated it but as it was Friday, you decided to make good use of the PC you’d saved up forever to build. You spawned in the middle of nowhere and built a bed before you found the half-finished settlement. You joined the chat but you must have been early as you were the only one there.

You headed back to the same mine, some work done since the first night, and laid your torches as you ventured into the depths. You jumped in your seat as a voice broke your peace.

“I don’t think anyone else is gonna join,” JJ-Smooth, or Jensen said, “you think maybe you’ll unmute?”

You stopped your mining and stared at the screen. You hovered over the mic button and re-read his name, he was the only other one there. You clicked and gave a strained smile to the screen.

“So, um, what’s the goal tonight?” you asked.

“Get some materials and go back to the settlement, keep building, oh, maybe we could try a portal, you ever gone to the nether?” he said but before you could reply he kept on, “shit, I shouldn’t assume, you seem like an experienced player.”

“Yeah, a few times, but I’m more a casual miner,” you went back to harvesting stone and ore.

“Ah,” he said, and it was silent for a moment, “so, you work again in the morning?”

“Not tomorrow,” you said as you focused on the game, “daycare isn’t open on the weekends.”

“A daycare, huh? That sounds fun, I love kids… not in a weird way but you know, I… urgh, I have a niece,” he said with a nervous chuckle, “nah, that’s cool though, sounds more fun than my gig.”

“Oh?” you turned and kept your axe moving.

“IT. You know, some people would be like ‘hey Jensen, why do you spend all your free time staring at a screen when that’s what you do at work?’” he scoffed, “well, who says I’m not mining there too.”

You wrinkled your forehead and gave a small laugh. He was rambling and it was kinda odd. You were happy for once not to be the strange one.

“But anyway,” he said, “I found lots of diamond over here. If we get some lapis lazuli we can build an enchanting table and get some sick armour.”

“Awesome,” you pressed your fingertips to your lip as you leaned on your elbow, “should try to head back before dark…”

“Hard to tell down here. How about you mine and I’ll keep an eye out for monsters?” he offered.

“Sure,” you agreed as he came onto your screen, “that works.”

🎮

Another week went by and you ventured back into the server a few times but not for very long as late nights did not mix with young children. The next weekend, you joined again on Saturday night and like the last few times it was just you and Jensen. You wondered why no one else was joining when the subreddit was so popular but you didn’t worry about it for long.

You mostly played in silence, Jensen did most of the talking and it was never about anything more than the game or his niece’s last soccer game. That night when you left the game, he kept typing on Discord.

‘I like playing with you,’ his message blipped up.

‘Same, thx.’

‘Really, you’re awesome.’

‘Thx :) Tired, gotta sleep.’

‘Sweet dreams.’

‘Night.’

You changed your status to offline and dragged yourself to bed. You opened your phone as you laid in the dark and went to the subreddit, you scrolled through the builds and screenshots of other people’s catastrophes.

You came to Jensen’s last invite post from that night but all the comments complained that the world code was incorrect. Hmm, you should tell him next time.

You blackened your cell and plopped it on your night table. You rolled over and buried your face in the pillow, the light still etched into your vision. You fell asleep quickly and woke the next day to another invite from Jensen.

‘How about some Fortnite? If you’re into it?’

‘Srry, can’t, my mom’s expecting me for lunch.’

‘2 bad, maybe later.’

‘Maybe’.

You got ready to go see your mother for your usual Sunday afternoon visit and it went by like any other. When she asked you what you’d been up to, you didn’t mention the gaming, she was never a fan of it. When you got back home, Jensen was messaging you again. You didn’t open the notification and settled in to catch up on some streaming before another week of work.

Monday hit you like a train and you were glad you hadn’t spent the night mining again. If you had, you doubted you’d even be able to open your eyes. You got to the daycare centre and welcomed in the kids. You got them set up for the morning snack then cleaned up as Sandy took them over to the reading circle.

You wiped the tables and then did some painting before you went out for some play time in the yard. As you watched several of the children on the swings, you glanced around. There was a man across the street. You squinted through the chain link as he seemed to be watching but assured yourself it was nothing as he quickly headed for the corner and disappeared.

Inside, the kids were due for quiet time, some napped and those who didn’t, stared at the ceiling and yawned. You could have joined them but knew that wouldn’t be acceptable. The end of the day came and you helped the kids pack up their paintings and their sweaters. You waited in the yard with them as the parents showed up and handed them off one by one.

You waved to Danika as she clung to her mother and your eye was once more drawn beyond the chain link. The same faded grey jacket, the same glasses, and the hat with the frayed brim. It was a better look at the man. Was he looking at you? Why on earth was he hanging around outside a daycare?

“Sandy,” you turned and lowered your voice as she neared, “see that man?”

She peeked over and shrugged, “which one? The guy crossing the street?”

You looked up again and like before, he was walking away casually as if he hadn’t just been staring through the fence. You shook your head and huffed. “Sorry, never mind.”

“Ah, don’t worry about it,” she waved her fingers, “come on, let’s clean up.”

With the kids all sorted out, you went back in and tidied up the last of their mess. You and Sandy were friendly but like with any, you weren’t very talkative. You never really knew what to say but you were never unkind.

You pulled on your jacket and checked your purse for your phone and wallet. You checked the time and turned off the lights. You bid Sandy goodbye as she headed for her SUV and you took your usual route down the sidewalk towards your bus stop.

You stopped short as the man was there. You were paranoid, he must just be waiting for the same route. You approached and he turned to watch you as you sat on the bench. He smiled and the dread sank deep in your chest.

His rectangular glasses gave light to his blue eyes and a goatee trimmed his jaw. He was tall and well-built, you could tell even under his comic book tee. He was going to talk to you, another weirdo in the city.

“Hey,” his voice was chillingly familiar, “how was your day?”

You stared at him and blinked cluelessly. You looked around, it was only the two of you. You opened your mouth but you had to be wrong. He said your name and you winced.

“Jensen?” you breathed as you stood and squeezed the strap of your bag, “why? How--?”

“You weren’t answering me, I was worried,” he said, “just making sure you’re okay.”

“What the-- I don’t understand how--” He stepped closer and you backed up against the bench. “Don’t, I’ll scream.”

“Scream? Why? I’m just-- You know me, it’s me, Jensen.”

“You doxxed me?” you snapped, “what the hell?”

“No, I didn’t-- I’m just checking on you--”

“I don’t know you,” you said as your heart began to race, “so please, leave me alone,” you edged away from him, “and don’t message me again.”

You sprinted across the street and as you came up on the curb, you looked back at him. He watched you but didn’t follow. You could tell from there he wasn’t happy but the brim of his cap shadowed most of his face so you couldn’t guess if it was hurt or anger. You quickly spun away and continued down the next street to the nearest stop.

You couldn’t believe he’d just shown up like that. You couldn’t believe he would think that was okay. You couldn’t believe he’d think that much about you.

🎮

You blocked Jensen on Discord and left his world on Minecraft. That night you were shaky and nervous, afraid that he would show up at your apartment. Did he know where you lived? He must if he could figure out where you worked.

You didn’t open Steam that night. You paced your small apartment, jumping at every noise. Sleep didn’t come easily but in shallow spurts that left you even more tired. You watched over your shoulder as you walked to your stop and boarded with one eye on the door.

Work was little better as you found yourself distracted in the room full of toddlers. Sandy asked if you were okay as you kneaded play-do violently. You shook yourself out of your paranoia and assured her you were only short on sleep, not a complete lie.

You took out your phone when you stepped out for a small break. Your mom had called but you would have to get back to her when you had two hours to waste. There was another notification, that one from Discord, a friend request from JJ-NoRematch. It wasn’t hard to guess who it was and you declined it right away.

There were several others from Jensen, too. He followed your Insta, blocked; he followed your mostly empty twitter, blocked; and he even commented on your LinkedIn like a weird. You closed your phone and took a breath before you headed back into the kids, their voices rising in their excitement to go outside.

In the yard, you had another look around, expecting to see him there on the other side of the fence. You were slightly relieved when he wasn’t but still on edge. You joined a game of tag then watched several of the kids line up for the slide. You lost yourself in your job as you told yourself he must have gotten the hint, at least not to bother you irl.

Just like the day before, and every day, you left work and headed for your stop. He wasn’t there either and you sat down and phoned your mom, hanging up as the bus pulled up with a promise to call her again when you were home. At home, you felt almost normal again and checked your notifications; no more follows, no more requests, nothing.

Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday passed in a similar fashion. Each saw your anxieties less than the day before. You even resolved to open Steam and start a new world for yourself. You spent hours mining and almost fell asleep in your chair. When you nearly tipped over, you decided it was time for bed.

You slept better than you had all week and woke up before noon. You wanted to log right back on but you had life to deal with; groceries, cleaning, and of course, making that call to your mother you’d delayed the night before. After all that, you felt accomplished and you decided to treat yourself to take out, a rare divulgence.

You called the local Chinese eatery and waited eagerly for your feast as you turned on a new episode of your current binge. You played on your phone until the battery was low and had enough juice to buzz up the delivery man. You dug for your wallet as you went to the door and unlocked it without looking up.

“How much--” you asked as you opened the door.

Your eyes met a familiar pair, two blue gems behind a pair of narrow glasses. Jensen wore the same cap and held the paper bag of take-out with a smile. You grabbed the door and tried to swing it shut but he was too quick as he slapped a large hand against the peeling paint.

“It’s on me,” he said, “I love spare ribs.”

“What the--” you gasped as you pushed on the door helplessly, “please go away.”

“You’re not answering me,” he said as he stepped closer and forced you back as his body brushed against yours, “you blocked me and I can’t even get a hey, Jensen, how are you?”

“I don’t want you here,” you tried to shove him and he shouldered you away easily, “get out!”

He slammed the door and you flinched. He put the bag down on the corner table and reached back to twist the lock without a look. His eyes roved around your entryway and further into your apartment. He smiled as they stilled and focused on you.

“This place is cute… like you,” he said and you heard a slight hesitation in his voice.

You swallowed and backed away from him. You spun on your heel and ran for your couch. You reached over the back to your phone and unlocked it as the battery icon flashed. You had just enough juice to make the call. You dialed as you turned back to him.

“I’m calling the police so you b-better l-leave,” you warned as your voice and hands shook, “I me--”

He was quick and before you could pull away, he swiped your cell out of your hand. He scoffed and tossed it across the room. It hit the wall and landed screen down on the hardwood. You bit down and pressed yourself to the couch. You stared at him and kicked yourself forward as you tried to slip past him. He caught you and wrestled you back into the front room.

“Why are you doing this?” he asked calmly as you struggled in his grasp, “I’ve been nothing but nice to you.”

“N-no, you’re-- you-- let me go,” you stammered as he angled you around the couch. He pushed you down so you bounced on the cushion. You tried to push yourself up and he pointed his finger in your face and wagged it.

“No, you stay,” he growled and wiped his other hand on his jeans. He was nervous, even if he was angry.

“Please, why-- what do you want?” you grasped the cushion and hovered at the edge of the couch.

He sighed and sat in the chair. He took his hat off and set it on the table as he ran his fingers through his short hair.

“Good question,” he said as his jaw squared and his eyes turned to pinpoints, “better one, why did you block me?”

“Are you serious? You-- you--” you struggled to get your words out, your voice even more splintered by your fear, “you doxxed me, you came to-- to my work-- and…”

“I thought we were getting along. I thought you liked me,” he said with a frown, “I really did, you sure acted like it and-- I only wanted to make sure you were safe.”

“But why wouldn’t I be? I--” you shivered and crossed your arms as you withered beneath his gaze, “Jensen, this was only supposed to be online.”

He scoffed and stomped his boot on the floor. He shook his head as he looked to the ceiling and his anger bulged along his temple. He tilted his head and looked at you again.

“You know, for years, I have been a nice guy, I am a nice guy,” he pushed his shoulders to his ears as he threw his hand out, “I’m so patient and caring and you girls, you don’t even give me a second look.”

“Jensen--”

“No, really, I mean look at you, you’re no supermodel and yet it’s the same thing, ‘let’s just be friends’,” he spat, “but I watch guys all the time treat women like shit and they don’t have any trouble at all, they got them hanging off of them and I’m a creep for giving them a compliment or opening the door--”

“I don’t… know you,” you eked out, “you have to understand--”

“I don’t understand,” he stood abruptly, “I’m done trying to understand.”

He pulled his jacket open and slid it down his arms. You watched him sling it over the chair and as he turned back to you, you stood. He caught your shoulders and held you in place. His strength was plain in his grip as he squeezed then slowly moved his hands to cradle your face.

“I just wanna be nice,” he said as he leaned in. You tried to pull away but he moved a hand around the back of your head and forced your lips against his. He poked his tongue inside your mouth roughly as you tried to shove him away. Finally, he parted, his hands still firmly around your head, “wasn’t that nice?”

“Please,” you begged as he ran his thumb over your bottom lip.

His eyes searched your face as you stared back at him in terror. He sighed and dropped his hands back to your shoulders. He pushed you down to the sofa harshly and backed away.

“Fine, I won’t be nice,” he snarled as he took his glasses off and folded them carefully. He put them on the table beside his cap and twined his fingers together, loudly cracking his knuckles.

You blinked at him as your eyes grew glossy. You brought your legs up under you and pressed yourself to the back of the couch. You grasped the upholstery and turned as you launched yourself over to the other side. You stumbled as you landed on your feet and ran for the door.

You were yanked back as he snaked his arms around you and took you off your feet. You kicked out and screamed but it was cut off by his palm as he kept one arm around your middle. You scratched at his hand as he dragged you back to the couch. He pushed you face down onto the cushions and planted his knee in the middle of your back, slipping his hand away as he put enough weight on you to keep your voice suffocated.

“Listen, I know I look like some IT nerd but I’m a lot more than that, now don’t make me hurt you,” he played with your hair as he smiled down at you, “you try that again and I will shut you up and if someone hears you, I can take care of them too.”

You sniffed as tears pricked in your eyes and nodded frantically as it felt as if he would snap your spine. He pushed off of you and you stayed as you were, paralysed with fear. He sat and unlaced his boots one at a time. He looked up as he set them neatly beside the foot of the chair and he bent to catch your eye.

“Well?” he pointed at you and traced the line of your body in the air, “let’s go.”

You stared at him dumbly and he stood to pull his tee over his head. His torso was sculpted perfectly and his chest trimmed with hair that trailed all the way down to his pants. He stepped forward and tugged at the back of your shirt.

“You want me to do it for you, baby?” he purred, “I can help you.”

You swatted him away and sat up. You bent your legs to your chest and hugged them. “Please, I’m scared, just leave me alone--”

His hand rested on his belt and exhaled again. His fingers moved swiftly to unloop the striped belt and unbutton his jeans. He pushed them down, nearly tripping as he stepped out of them. He stood in his boxers, tented with his impatient excitement, and gripped his hips.

“It’s okay, baby, I know you’re shy, I am too,” he neared and you winced as he grabbed your wrist. He tugged on your arm and you resisted until he bent your hand back painfully and you cried out. He tickled your jaw as he looked you in the eye and tutted, “it doesn’t have to be like this, alright?”

You went limp and let him pull your arms apart. Your legs slipped down and your feet dangled above the floor. He got to his knees and pushed between yours. He slowly rolled up the hem of your shirt and bent to kiss your stomach as he bared the flesh. You trembled as he forced your arms up and swooped the fabric over your head. It fluttered through the air and to the floor as he cupped your tits through your bright pink bra.

“Is this so bad?” he asked as he nuzzled your chest and pushed your tits up.

He glided the straps down your arm and slid your bra lower so that you popped out. He nibbled at your flesh and traced your nipples with his tongue. You sat rigid and let him explore your body, too terrified to move a muscle. He reached around you and struggled with the hooks, frustrated he snapped the clasps and the band came free.

He continued to play with your chest, his fingers crawling up and down your stomach and sides. There was a genuine curiosity to his touch and it sent a chill through you. His fingertips pressed to the top of your pants and he pulled at them as his lips travelled down to your hip.

He tugged on your pants and jerked your entire body. He tore them lower as he pushed you up and you lifted yourself to let him peel away the layer. He added them to the floor and toyed with the elastic of your panties. The little bow in the front drew his attention as he pushed your legs wider and ran his nose along the cotton.

He hummed and rubbed his fingers down your crotch, pushing the fabric to your folds as he teased you through them. You inhaled sharply at the tingle it inspired and he pressed firmer against you, flicking his fingers along your bud as he noticed how it made you squirm.

He gently pulled aside the cotton and you felt his hot breath against you. You pushed on his head before he could delve into you. “Please, don’t--”

“Shhhh,” he threw your hand away from his head and bent over you, “just relax.”

He dragged his tongue along your cunt and lingered around your clit. You clenched as it sent a thrill through you and he moved his lips against you, suckling at you bud as your breaths grew raspy. You pushed yourself against the back of the couch and dug your nails into the cushion.

He slid a finger along your cunt and circled your entrance. He rubbed up and down as he kept his tongue swirling over your clit and you swallowed back as gasp as he poked inside. He felt around and added another finger, stretching you as he carefully pushed them in and out of you in time with his mouth.

He lapped you up and you closed your eyes, desperate to resist the coil winding within you. Your legs tensed against the couch and you tilted your pelvis without thinking. He sped up, the noise of his mouth and your slickness filled the silence. You let out a puff and moaned as you slapped the couch. The waves rolled over your flesh and you came into his mouth with a pathetic mewl.

He stilled his fingers as he lazily teased you with his tongue. He pulled his fingers out and sat back, the heat between your legs cooling in his absence as he licked up your juices. He watched you as he sucked his fingers and stood. Your head lolled and you edged forward on the couch. You tried to stand but he caught you and flung you back.

“We’re not done, baby,” he winked at you as he grasped the top of his boxers, “go on, lay down.”

You murmured your refusal and once more tried to get up. You slipped onto the floor and shakily crawled away as he dropped his boxers to his ankle. He grabbed you before you could get around the side and lifted you easily. He turned you and shoved you down onto your back as he lifted a leg over you.

He straddled you and again his hands roved over your body. You smacked at his fingers weakly but he easily ignored you. He kept one hand moving along your curves as he stroked himself with the other. He groaned and shook as he stroked his dick. Your eyes followed his hand and you gulped, he was thick.

He moved his knees back and pushed them up beneath your thighs as he kept a hand planted on your chest. He ripped your panties down your legs and untangled them from your feet.

He held you down as he ran his tip along your cunt, wetting himself with your coerced arousal. You groaned and grabbed the arm of the couch above you. You tried to pull away from him.

He pushed against your entrance and you looked at him in shock. You couldn’t stop him. His eyes were set between your legs as he inhaled and slowly eased into you. He gasped as he got his tip inside you and his muscles tensed. He bit his lip as he dove further in and you gasped as he filled you inch by inch.

“Shitttt,” he moaned as he reached his limit and you whined at how full you were, “oh, baby.”

His hand slid from your chest and he gripped your hips as he pulled back and thrust. You exclaimed and he did it again, slowly as he watched himself impale you over and over. You curled your fingers against the couch arm and your feet arch as you pressed your thighs around him. He lifted your pelvis high as he angled his dick even deeper.

“You feel so good,” he rasped, “oh, baby, you’re so good. Ahh-hh-hh,” his voice fizzled as your walls clenched him and you closed your eyes as you felt the heat building.

He moved his hand along your thigh and stretched it over your pelvis, pushing his thumb to your clit as he kept his pace. He purred as you writhed helplessly against him and you panted through the rising ecstasy.

“Please, please, please…” you chanted, unsure if you were begging him to stop or for more.

He moaned as he sped up and you sucked your lip under your teeth as you neared your peak. You quivered as your orgasm crashed into you and you let out a strangled cry. He snarled and planted his hands beside your head as he leaned over you, his hot breath tickled your face as he pounded into you.

Your legs bent around him as his pelvis rubbed against you and the friction drove you to another climax. You held onto the arm of the couch as he fucked your harder and harder. He kissed you and nibbled at your lip as he groaned and hooked an arm under to hold you close.

“You’re gonna make me cum, baby,” he said against your cheek and you turned your head away from, “ah, here I--”

He spasmed and slammed into you. He took several long thrusts and stilled. He grunted and drew heavy breaths as he rested his weight over you. He grabbed your head and turned your head up as he pressed his forehead to yours. You kept your eyes closed as the flames slowly dwindled.

“Was that so bad?” he stroked your cheek and trailed his finger down to poke between your lips, “No, it’s what you wanted, isn’t it, baby?” he wiggled his hips and you hissed, “yeah, you want me.”

#jake jensen #dark jake jensen #dark!jake jensen #jake jensen x reader #the losers #fic #dark!fic #dark fic #one shot

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