#disappearances will eventually rack up

[comatosebunny09]

soft kitty, warm kitty [ one ] | sylus

— summary: the one where the adorable stray cat you take in is not all that he appears to be. — cw: silliness, fluff, slight injury and blood mention, shapeshifting, hybrid au, self-indulgent af — now playing: carousel - evgeny grinko

There was this pretty stray kitty you’d been feeding and playing with outside your job for three or so months. 

At first, it wasn’t your biggest fan. It spat, hissed, and swiped at you whenever you got too close—you learned to carry band-aids in your bag from thereon. But it still quietly nibbled on the food you left out when you were at a safe distance. You made a point to refill its bowls each time you came to work. Started leaving a cardboard box with a solar-powered heating pad outside to help it battle the glacial nights that often befell the city. 

Eventually, it grew accustomed to you. With baby steps, it came closer and closer each day, sometimes perching itself on the bench you sat on during your lunch or smoke breaks to keep you company. With time, it allowed you to pet it. Its ivory fur was surprisingly soft beneath the street sludge and grime it accumulated throughout the time you knew it. It also had striking, scarlet eyes you brushed off as a genetic mutation. Plenty of weird animals inhabited the city, so an uncommon eye color wasn’t particularly unsettling. 

The adorable stray only allowed you to touch it, reverting to its initial attitude when your coworkers got too close. It seemed to specifically take a liking to you, bunting its little cranium against your hand and ankles, marking you with its scent, grooming you with its barbed tongue, and purring like the low rumble of a Mustang. 

Finally, you decided to catch it. You noticed a red, crusted ring adorning its tiny ankle. It must’ve been injured. You weren’t sure how long it would survive on the streets before infection set in, and your caring instincts were screaming at you to save it. 

So, you did.

It was surprisingly easy to lure the little guy into a cat carrier with treats. It crawled into the bag effortlessly, almost as if it wanted to be rescued. That afternoon, you took it to the vet. They cleaned its foot, gave you cream and antibiotics to ward off infection, updated its shots—the whole nine yards. 

It had also been revealed to you that your feline friend was a boy. The vet offered to neuter him, but you staved it off, promising to return later. You could barely afford the bill he racked up from his treatment alone.

With a warm smile, you cradled the carrier, holding your new companion in your lap as you rode the subway. The pretty, sedated feline purred nonstop on the commute home. 

It took some time to adjust. Of course, you hadn’t expected his transition to succeed overnight. 

When you gave him his first bath, he wasn’t the happiest camper. He adorned your arms with angry, red streaks to illustrate his discontent. His coat was lustrous and white beneath the grime and fleas. And though he was initially a hissing, snooty ball of fluff following his bath, he purred continuously when he curled up beside you that night in your bed, seemingly grateful to be off the street.

You find with time that old habits die hard.

You bought him a red leather collar to compliment his eyes. With it came a bell and pendant, and your address was carved into it. The little guy loved to slip out of your apartment at night, often returning to the streets he was so accustomed to. He always came back, sometimes days after disappearing. He brought you little presents, ranging from dead mice to shiny, crimson gems that looked like they could’ve been worth a fortune. Snowball, as you had fondly named him, was truly a marvel. He was adjusting to domestic life well, but you didn’t stifle him when he wanted to spend his nights perusing the city and stirring up little cat mischief.

You were grateful for the company. You’d been living in the city for about a year, having relocated to its heart for your job. You didn’t have any family in the area, so you relied heavily on your coworkers for social interaction. Otherwise, you were on your own. 

It was pleasant to have a little fur ball bouncing around your home, knocking things off your dresser, shacking up in your pantry, or hiding under your dining table, ready to attack your ankles. He brought excitement to your otherwise humdrum life, keeping you on your toes while curling up at your feet, expressing his gratitude for everything you’d done for him thus far. 

You were content despite your solitude, looking forward to what your furry companion had in store for you each day.

You awaken to sunbeams coloring the space behind your eyelids. To the melody of birds chirping and cars occasionally easing by on the street. 

A quiet smile rounding your lips, you reach beside you to pet through familiar tufts of white. Snowball routinely curls up next to your head on the pillow when you sleep. You haven’t yet opened your eyes, so you’re a little caught off guard when his fur feels slightly shorter than usual. 

Still, you wear a smile as you fondly coo at your kitty, your voice rough with sleep. He doesn’t purr in response, which is strange given his purr motor’s always been broken. He never knows when to stop. Perhaps he doesn’t feel well today? 

Cautiously, you pry your eyes open, your vision blurry from the sun's rays. Through the haze, you ingest a familiar wash of stark white. Your eyesight gradually corrects, and you can discern shapes and colors. Upon taking in the scene beside you, you stiffen, your silly little smile frozen in place.

On the other side of your bed, where Snowball would usually be roosted, quietly waiting for you to stir from your slumber, lies a tan stretch of skin. Recognizable red eyes watch you beneath short, swept lashes, blinking sluggishly, a humored cant to pink-petaled lips. 

Reality slowly trickles in. There is very much a warm-blooded man beside you in place of your darling feline. Your smile melts away, traded for something of confusion. And once you’ve fully processed the moment, you do what any logical person would do given this situation: you scream.

The strange man beside you winces, a searing, heavy hand shooting out to cover your mouth. Your voice dies in the back of your throat, and the stranger takes you in with mild irritation donning his features.

“Must you be so noisy?” he grouses, the rough slide of his voice furling in your stomach. You blink owlishly at him, his hand still clamped over your mouth. 

As the adrenaline spuming through your body tempers, and you’ve taken more time to breathe and assess your situation, you fully observe the intruder.  And with a mixture of horror and confusion, you intake a familiar set of ivory, tufted ears twitching atop his head.

Again, you let your instincts guide you, and you do what one would typically do in this situation: you reach out to tweak said ears, confirming the familiar glide of silken fur beneath your fingertips. The stranger sucks in a breath, jerking away from your prodding. He fixes you with an iron gaze that pierces straight through to your soul. A look you’re all too familiar with, Snowball having pinned you with it at random times throughout your day.

You scream again, the sound of it muffled behind the meatiness of the stranger’s palm. Only, this is no stranger.

Is this—is this Snowball?

[dejwrld]

⤷‧₊˚ hiromi higuruma helps his bratty sub study for her bar exam.

┊ •° ੈ ⋆° ┊ warning readers discretion is advised — black reader with descriptors, female anatomy described, her/she pronouns, usage of y/n, reader is a law student, mentions of reader being the child of a judge, mentions of law, dom!hiromi, sub!reader, reader described to be very feminine and bratty, no cursed au, dom x sub dynamic, usage of toys (vibrating panties), oral (reader receiving), pet names (good girl, doll), mentions of pubes, praise kink (academical), bonus after care scene, written in third pov (hiromi’s), mdni

sticky note from deja — sometimes i think about dom hiromi higuruma and just sigh happily.

Hiromi passed his bar exam with flying colors. He didn’t do study groups. Simply studied alone and prioritized his time to balance being a law clerk, studying, and socializing to ensure a law firm hired him. But this woman didn’t do any of that and frankly, he was even shocked that she still wanted to pursue law at all. She graduated from law school with a high GPA, and wonderful recommendations from amazing professors, and her father was a prominent judge. Many can assume that her pretty looks and her legacy surname got her where she is today, but Hiromi has observed her in her element and when she was in her element she was a beast. 

So the older lawyer had no clue why she came to him with law books in her arm, her tote bag slung on her shoulders—tight coils sprawled on her head like a crown, and a tight suede tracksuit on as if she was stepping into her law class. But of course, when she had a problem, she came to him. When she needed a quick nut, she came to him. Needing someone to vent about when it came to her class rival, she came to him. Now it seemed she needed help studying for the exam and who did she come to, him.

But as an hour and thirty minutes went by, the young woman was not soaking up the information that Hiromi was going over. His eyes bored into the notebook, flashcards, and textbooks scattered across his desk. She watches as she twirls her pink pen around her fingers reading over the notes she jolted down, but he can just tell by the crinkle of her eyebrows that the information wasn’t going through that thick skull of hers. It wasn’t that he didn’t believe she knew the information because she did. But he doubted she’d remember it for the exam. He leaned back into his comfortable black desk chair trying to rack his brain with a better studying technique before eventually he got an idea. An imaginary light bulb lit up over the top of the lawyer’s head.

“I think I have an idea.” He spoke out, causing her to stop her highlighting—which he was hoping she would do because the scent of the highlighter was already giving him a headache simply because she just had to have scented ones. 

This one smells like strawberries, smell it? Those were her exact words forty-five minutes ago as he was going over some laws on family laws. 

“Will it help me feel like the information I’m consuming is sticking and staying in my brain?” 

“Possibly,” was the only thing Hiromi answered before pulling himself out of his seat and disappearing from his office.

It was three things the woman that sat across from him enjoyed. Shopping, her father’s credit card, and sexual pleasure. If Hiromi had any more knowledge of psychology, he would have labeled Y/N as a nymphomaniac. 

When returned with the red velvet box, he sat the box on the table and she perked up happily, possibly thinking that this was a sparkly diamond necklace for her. 

“A gift? Aw, this definitely will help.” Her plush glossed lips spread into a smile. She claps her hands together in excitement sitting up in the chair. 

“It’s not a necklace, doll.” He points out. She opened the box revealing the black lace underwear that had a vibrator inside of them. 

He was going to use these at their anniversary dinner as a sub and dog duo, but he guessed he had to come up with another idea to make their dinner interesting. His gloomy eyes watched as her eyes lit up like fuckin’ fireworks. His assumption was right. He watches as she simply stands up ready to remove her underwear eagerly.

“I do think a quick sex session will help me focus a bit more. This is why I came to you. At first, I was going to join that one guy who knows Nanami's study group, but in my mind—I just knew you would have a better study idea.” She giggled as her hand went to untie her tracksuit bottoms to change into the other panties.

“No, we’re not doing that. Put the panties on and sit back down.” He scattered around his desk to give her time to change into the vibrating panties. 

He thought she was going to argue against what he said, but she didn’t. As quiet as can be, she’s shuffling to remove her underwear and replace it with the sexual treat that Hiromi graced upon her. While she changed, Hiromi was looking for the notebook that he used when he was studying for his bar exam. He knew it had a bunch of mock bar exam questions on there and thought they would help. When he found the book, he walked back to his desk and Y/N sat patiently waiting for him, she went back to reading her textbook without a care. 

Hiromi removed the box from the table, placing it on the ledge behind him after he grabbed the remote. He slammed the notebook on the table that looked like it’s been through centuries of war. He liked keeping it because it showed how far he had come from a law student to one of the best lawyers in the city. He skimmed through the pages before finding a page he wanted to start on. 

“A defendant is being prosecuted for conspiracy to possess methamphetamine with intent to distribute. At trial, the government seeks to have its agent testify to a conversation that he overheard between the defendant and a co-conspirator regarding the incoming shipment of a large quantity of methamphetamine. That conversation was also audiotaped, though critical portions of it are inaudible. The defendant objects to the testimony of the agent on the ground that it is not the best evidence of the conversation.” He pauses briefly to look at Y/N across from him. “Is the testimony of the agent admissible?” 

He watches as she brings her French tip manicured finger to her chin to think. He had a feeling she knew the answer, she told him about the paper she had done about admissible evidence. But as he watches her shoulders go upward and downward in an ‘I don’t know’ manner, Hiromi lets out a sigh before pressing the remote. The silence in his office was disrupted by the sound of the vibration. He watches as she jerks forward provocatively. He leans back in his seat.

“You know the answer to this, stop being a smart ass.” Hiromi’s slender fingers toyed with the small remote watching as she was withering forward in attempting to mask her moan.

“It’ll be admissible,” She breathes out. 

“Why?” Hiromi asked. 

For a quick second, he can see a glint of sexual frustration in her eyes. This was the first sexual encounter in a while due to him restricting them from it. He had a huge case coming up and she had to study for the bar exam. Sex would cloud their judgment on the tasks they had to do. 

“The best evidence rule does not require proof of the conversation through the audiotape.” 

He presses the button on the remote making the vibrator stop. “Good girl. I knew you knew that.” His lips crack a smile and he watches as she recomposes herself. 

“Next question.” Hiromi flips through the pages in his notebook. “Hypothetically thinking, say a person broke into a closed building to solely seek refuge due to a snowstorm. Can this person be convicted of burglary if that’s her defense?” His fingers were itching to press the button, but he had to hear her answer first.

“No.” 

“Why? Come on baby, you know they’re going to ask why?” 

“I’m not sure, let me think.” 

It didn’t take long before Hiromi pressed the button. Her moans echoed within the study while clasping her thighs closed to engulf the sudden vibration from the panties she wore. She falls back into the seat across from him and her body arches off of it briefly before she’s finally croaking out an explanation. 

“Burglary requires the intent to commit a crime upon entering a building and seeking shelter from a storm is not a criminal act. So, this hypothetical person can validate her claim.” 

“That’s right. You’re doing amazing with these questions. Just need it to stick in your brain, that’s all.” He reassures Y/N with a smile.

The quizzing went on for about thirty minutes, but Hiromi had lost track of time when he felt how tight his cock felt in his slacks. He was sure she had orgasmed multiple times from the vibrating panties just by the way her eyes drooped, her body slouching in the leather seat she was in, and the fact that he could see her hardened nipples through the sports bra after she had unzipped the hoodie of her tracksuit. She had this tendency where if he wasn’t touching her during little sessions, she had to touch herself. Which she did, right across from him—each time he flicked the remove on causing the vibrating on her pussy, she'd pinch her marbled nipples while uttering out a response to a random law question. 

“I think you deserve a break for today. You still have the weekend to study,” He pointed out as he tossed the remote back into its box. “Come here.” 

She’s hesitant at first and Hiromi can tell just by the way her lips part to argue and her eyebrows frown together. She wasn’t sure if she should cave and come forward or stay put just to feel the vibrating in between her thighs again. She knew that he knew she always defied him in some way just to get a rise out of him, but today—it seems her head was screwed on right. After all, Hiromi didn’t have to help Y/N study. Helping her study wasn’t a part of the contract, but he did—in such an odd sexy manner that caused her to be soaked between her thighs. 

As she tiptoed around the wooden desk, she was peeling off her clothes so provocatively that Hiromi couldn’t help but swallow the harsh knot that formed in his throat. He couldn’t wait for himself to be buried so far in between her sumptuous thighs that the only thing he could smell on his top lip was her essence. Hiromi spread his muscular thighs so that she could take place between them—looking down at him like she was Aphrodite and he was a man that she had just placed under a spell due to her elegance. His hand grabs her waist letting his hands caress every bump and curve of her body that he was obsessed with. From the stretch marks that decorate her mahogany skin to the small mole that was right near her belly button. 

“You drive me fuckin’ insane,” Hiromi finds himself saying. His dark eyes scan at how her lips spread into a grin. 

He grabs her, placing her on his desk without a sweat. The sound of textbooks and notebooks echoed through the office as he pulled himself further under the table. Her legs gaped so provocatively that in Hiromi’s mind, the Lady Justice statue on the shelf on his left probably wanted to clutch her pearls. Hiromi placed subtle kisses on her legs starting from her ankle which was decorated bejeweled with a diamond anklet. 

“You’re stalling. You know how much I want you right now, and you’re stalling.” The law student breathes as she leans back on the weight of her arms. 

Hiromi watches as her chest begins to rise rapidly with each kiss growing closer to her pussy. Her words went into one ear and out the other for the lawyer and when he was finally face to face with what his mouth salivated for, his eyes met with hers. Her eyes were pleading for something. A kiss. A nibble. A lick. Hell, even a blow. Anything to soothe the aching feeling on her clit. Y/N’s hand went down to palm at the wetness in between her thighs, so eager and impatient—but the stern lawyer stopped her. 

“Don’t fucking touch yourself, Y/N.” He commands. 

And there goes the tone she was longing for. Oh, that authoritarian tone that made her pussy clench when he used it. She relaxes under his touch and lets him do his work. “If you’re going to take so long, I might as well finish off by myself.” Y/N comments. 

“You talk so much, do you love hearing yourself talk?” 

“And you are doing so much talking for a man whose mouth should be stuffed with my pus—”

Her words were interrupted by the feeling of Hiromi’s tongue dragging upon her panties. He pulled them to the side swiftly and finally was granted what he wanted all along. The flat of his tongue licks up her pussy lips collecting her juices like a man that was deprived of water for days. He moans at the taste of her and his hands grab at her waist to pull her closer. His eyes flutter close as he’s lapping at her puffy pussy lips at the sound of her moans. Her fingers entangled in his hair as her hips grind against his face. She wasn’t sure what was turning her on more. The way his face was buried into her pussy or how attractive it looked as his nose was nuzzling against her pubes. 

“Fuck.” She moans out, her toes curling at the feeling of his tongue flicking her clit. 

Hiromi detaches himself from her briefly, peppering soft kisses on her trembling thighs before devouring her whole again. The thing about Hiromi is that he knew how her body would react to certain things. He knew how her pussy clenched around his cock when he gave her neck a little squeeze. He knew that she was in between a squirter and creamer depending on the task. Squirting when he’s fingering her with a vibrator practically glued upon her clit. Creamer when he’s forcing orgasm after orgasm out of her after begging him to cum inside her (but to Hiromi, having his cum inside her is merely a privilege). So of course, he knew using his tongue to trace alongside the drooling entrance of her pussy was going to have her pushing herself forward for more. The mere feeling of his tongue invading her in such a manner that had her a trembling and whimpering mess was something Hiromi knew about her. 

Hiromi lets out a moan at how good she tastes. The taste of Y/N has graced his tongue countless times and he still ate her out as if it was the best meal he has tasted. With each squirm in his arms, he’s flicking his tongue slower on her clit. With each moan of his name that slips by her plush lips, he’s granting her more licks and sucks. He wanted to see her come undone right here. He could feel it just by the way her thighs were poorly attempting to entrap his head by shutting them. 

He lets out an annoyed sigh after he removes himself from her pussy, “Do you want to cum, Y/N?” 

“I do. I want to cum.” She whines.

“Then fuckin’ act like it.” 

Y/N obediently nods, her snarky comment jammed into her throat before she let Hiromi spread her thighs even wider than what they were before. Her clit throbbing to be in his mouth again and he graciously granted her wish. Like a deprived man, Hiromi snuggled his nose back into her pubes as if he belonged there. Y/N was aware that Hiromi knew she was about to cum. He had this tendency to hold onto her as if she would turn into dust in his arms—as if he didn’t want to let her go. That’s what he was currently doing as her orgasm was spilling over. One hand gripping her in place (that she knew would leave a bruise) and the other palming his hardened cock through his pants.

Just with the flick of his tongue, an explosive feeling causes Y/N to let out a dragged-out moan. Her back lays back on the desk as Hiromi’s tongue helps her ride out the orgasm. Her French pedicured toes curl at the feeling of that fiery pit in her stomach shattering so intensely it brought tears to her eyes. Her fingers tugged at his black strands of hair as if they were a handle holding her up from falling. When she heard him remove himself from her with a pop, Hiromi leaned back in his seat with a huge satisfied grin on his face.

After Y/N came down from the euphoria of cumming in Hiromi’s mouth, she sat up on her elbows with a pleased look on her face. She knew after any sexual intercourse with the high-profile lawyer, he just had to include aftercare in the special package. He may have gotten off at the thought of seeing her tied up with rope, handcuffed to his headboard, or mouth gagged with his cock—but he was very serious when it came to aftercare. The two soon settled for a bath to end the evening. The warmth of the water engulfed their bodies as they were in the large bathtub filled with scented soap and rose petals. Hiromi’s head fell back to be met with the marbled tile and he let out a relaxing sigh, the scent of Y/N lingering on his upper lip and tongue. 

“I have a confession to make..” Y/N leans further back on him, relaxing under the warmth of both the water and Hiromi’s body. 

“Hm.” He hums lightly letting his eyes flutter back open.

“I’m actually well prepared for the bar exam. Took a practice bar exam a week ago and according to my professor—if it was the real one, I would have passed.” She happily sighs letting her fingers play with the bubbles in the tub. 

“What?” Hiromi glares at the back of her head with a displeased look.

“I woke up this morning with a student and tutor sex fantasy, silly.” 

“You will be the death of me.” 

⤷‧₊˚ cuties that wanted to be tagged | @tojiscumdumpster @salaciousdoll @thithesandofferings @tachibannaa @shinsousliya @sinistersnakey1427 @gothogue @rhionnajones @jamaicanqueenaa @dxmb-luv @0hmyg0th @ryukenzz @dancingwithdeities @getosbunny @hvly @racconwarrer @aiyaaayei @torapologist @strawhatsav @msdrpreist @neesieiumz @strawberrymuffinlovin @consternat1on @photosbyameil

thanks for reading. <3

[moonieandi]

snapshots | stanley pines x f!reader 

summary: a quick look through concerning the early months of your life “married” to stanley pines

warnings (TW): swearing

tags: fluff, early relationship described, vague-pining 

notes: this is probably just for me… but if anyone enjoys it then ill endeavor to continue it in some fashion. No note beyond that i just really really really like stanley.

edit 8/27/24: hello! below i have linked my new masterlist of parts concerning this one-shot turned series. thank you, and enjoy!

word count: 2.3k

| masterlist | part ii |

 His earliest memories of her are hastily intertwined with the abrupt disappearance of his estranged brother. 

There is a sudden break in his memory, between following Ford to the crumbling shack’s basement, to returning upstairs without him, and eventually opening the door to her very hazarded face. 

Her head had been engulfed by a too-big hat, hair matted and stringily stuck to her flushed face, thanks to the bitter winds that racked northern Oregon that winter. She had hauled ass from the “middle-of-nowhere” bus stop to in-town, to the shack. Miles, he had presumed, and her wet socks had solidified the fact. 

If he had known she would appear at the shack's front entrance not even a week after Ford had disappeared before his very eyes, then he would count himself lucky for the forewarning, because she made in through the front door like a tidal wave. 

He eventually welcomed the intrusion, of course, but it took not even 10 minutes for his hackles to rise after she implored at the whereabouts of his long-gone brother. Unfortunately for Stanley, she never once bought the practiced lie that he was Stanford. A lie that he only had the courage to voice now, but it fell weak on her ears. Of course, she had known poindexter… and of course, she had no inkling of Stanley’s own existence. Stanford had never spoken of his no-good brother then. Another nail in the coffin, next to the nails Stanley had put there himself. 

She spoke only in bursts as if it pained her. Voice dry from the winter air. 

“Where is he?” She frantically waved a pressed paper around, previously having been folded up in her pocket. “He asked for me, so where is he? Where is that idiot?” 

“Look hun, I have no idea what you're talking about.” Hands dragging through his too-long hair. “I’m him, he’s me, now what did I send ya again?” He moves to reach for the paper, but she crumbles it in her mittened hands, clutching it like a lifeline. 

His lie is weak, but he could do without the intrusion after the long week of attempting to compile his brother's ramblings in that god-forsaken journal. 

He didn’t even know her name for fucks sake. 

This was never the fault point in his lie to her though. Because she knew instinctually that he was not Ford, and that was all that mattered conclusively to her in the end. They shared features, that was something she could not easily deny. The same curve of their jawlines, the same texture of hair, the same set eyes, but she knew simply by the way he talked that this was not her former colleague. 

Her colleague was not nearly as broad-chested as the man in front of her. Not as sure-footed as the man in front of her, and despite them both sharing obvious features, wasn’t as striking as the figure painted in front of her. 

Unfortunately for her predicament, the man in front of her made her nervous, suddenly. Whether it was the sudden realization that she had entered this random man’s home, or that she was entranced by the way the distant kitchen light lit his features. She was unsure. 

Looking back at the paper, and then again at his large outstretched hand, she admitted defeat to her curiosity surrounding him. She would need a cup of coffee. 

Sighing, she brought the paper back to its original place in her pocket. Taking off her hat, her shoulders began to droop. She had walked miles, and she would get an explanation from him no matter what. 

“Do… do you have any coffee?” 

Movement in the shack was constant. 

He was used to the usual up and down the basement stairs nowadays, and the usual venture from room to room also. 

The woman had a habit of nesting. Much like his own mother. 

She constantly had to move things, change around Ford’s shitty sci-fi bullshit, and rearrange cupboards. The first month she took to doing it he figured it was her way of simply coping with the reality of their shitty situation, but after the third month, he changed his toon. 

My god was she short, but oddly fucking mighty. 

It was on the third month he had caught her rearranging the livingroom finally. It had been the most intimidating room in the shack, thanks to the mud-soaked 80’s carpet, and the mysterious tanks that Ford just had to store upstairs for some reason. 

Luckily in their cohabitation, they both agreed that Ford’s stuff all needed to be moved from out of site. Not really for them per se, but more so so they could both catalog all his bullshit. Cataloging was something she insisted on, so he got very used to random sticky notes with her small handwriting. He would admit that his knees began to ache not too many weeks ago from the constant movement of Ford’s shit to the basement, but he more or less refused to let her assist in the move when it came to walking down the very steep flight of stairs. 

He didn’t want her to fall, okay? 

He didn’t want anything to happen really, in regards to her. He tried to separate genuine feelings when it came to her presence in general. So when they eventually parted ways, it wouldn’t feel like another nail. 

But she had to goddamn move everything in this house, and he got the distinct feeling she didn’t enjoy the fact that none of it was really theirs to move. She had insisted though, one night, that it was important that they made themselves comfortable. 

“I’ll take the goddamn fall for this, mmk Stanley?” A slight upturned smirk on her lips. “Ford can yell at me all he likes, but if we are stuck here for some time let's not live like he’s just around the corner.” 

Despite his constant bickering about her and the stairs though, he found her upstairs one evening, attempting to move the long three-person couch from one of the rooms to the downstairs living room. 

She blushed, caught red-handed. “Okay okay, but this would be better downstairs in front of the T.V., no?” 

He tisked, hands on his hips. “And ya’ just couldn’t wait, huh.” 

She laughed while he reached for the other end, cursing under his breath. “Can’t leave you alone for a minute.” 

The couch did make it downstairs, but not without some cursing, teamwork, and some pinched fingers when taking it around the bend to the top of the stairs. Stanley leading in front, holding the majority of the weight the entire way. Not that he would tell her that. 

The couch made a home in front of the tiny box T.V. that they had, and they both enjoyed the comfort it brang. The shag carpet wasn’t as comfy to sit on as the couch. 

They both sat with a grunt, after adjusting the long couch. 

“Ah, now this I could get used to.” He flung himself onto the couch, closest to the back door. 

Popping down, she made her home on the other end. “Mhmmm. Good plan, good decision, go team!” Her hand extended out for a fist bump from him. 

His hand dwarfed her own as he met her in the middle. 

She was smart, he realized, too smart for the likes of him.

She was quick as a whip for sure, with knowledge of a hodge-podge of things, and half the time she talked when they were both downstairs he didn’t have a clue what she was saying. He hated it down here at times, her rambling reminding him of his faintly forgotten childhood. She was so different in the basement. She was so different from when she was upstairs. Like she turned it on and off. 

She herself knew that Stanely probably didn’t understand most of what Ford had been doing, but at times she felt she understood even less so. So she spoke it to him, to fill some void when they were down there. The void being Ford, of course, the bridge between the two.

She couldn’t help but get the inkling that Stanley did not think fondly of the basement, whether it was due to her ramblings, or because this was essentially his brother's coffin, she didn’t wish to ask. It was the one thing she hadn’t bothered to voice yet. 

He had been assisting with moving the portal's original structure all week. She needed the area cleared, to properly reassemble the shape of the portal and then lift it to its original place on the basement wall. The pulley mechanism was hastily drawn out somewhere in the control room,  but she also needed a proper understanding of the material's weight and durability to calculate the simple engineering equation. 

Of course, she attempted to do this without looking up from her scribbles. 

Stanley’s movement around the basement set her on edge. The sweat-soaked tank top, the curly messy hair, the broadness of his chest, the god-damn grunting as he moved material around. 

I mean, okay, she had asked him to do this specifically, but she… was beginning to forget why exactly she had. She had also offered assistance, too, which he shrugged off like he had the furniture.

Right, yes the weight she needed the weight. 

“Umm Stanley, have you been able to find in the journal what kind of material this is?”

He grunted, metal falling to the wayside as he turned to her. “Nah Doc, couldn’t find shit.” He lifted his tanktop end, dabbing at his forehead. “But I can tell you one thing, ain’t like anything I’ve seen before.” 

“Hmmm. You are right, this is almost too heavy to be normal steel, and it seems Ford didn’t exactly weld these pieces together. There’s no evidence of tig welding traditionally used.” 

He moved closer, his hand on his hip, the other extended. 

“Lemme check the diagram again, he leaves weird shit in the ledgers all the fucking time.” 

His hand grazing her own, she passes over the journal. 

He flips to the part of the portal page they have access to, his fingers meeting his tongue as he flicks from page to page. Contemplatively, his hand rests on his chin, and the entirety of the book rests in his own hand. 

Leaning over like that, he takes her breath for a moment. 

“See here.” He grabs her forearm, pulling her back in front of the journal still in his grasp. “He writes this cryptic message in the ledgers around the drawing, but it cuts off because we only got one part of this bullshit.” 

She sighs deeply, her hand running through her hair multiple times. 

“Fucking hell Ford goddamn it.” She quickly rethinks, hands waving to push Stanley back a bit. So she can breathe again. “I’m sorry, really, I just mean-” 

His laugh is low and shakes his shoulders until his head falls forward, his hand meeting her own on his chest. 

Breath gone, again. 

“Doc, ain’t no way we gonna get this done unless we curse him out from time to time.” His hand engulfs hers, making her form a fist he brings it to his head, knocking his temple. “I curse him too from time to time, but usually up here.” 

“Stanley, I really am sorry. I just-” A sigh, a shake of her shoulders. “I wanna know what the hell he was thinking, Stanley, I wanna understand I really do, but I don’t know what’s next. I don’t know what to do.” 

Three months of rearranging upstairs combined with the two additive months spent in the basement had drained her, and he knew it. 

She was different down here, changed. That’s why he fucking hated it down here. Because it upset her like this. She was too pale down here, too weary, and too goddamn self-conscious. 

The thing that had plagued him for so long, the inadequacy he felt all his life when compared to his other half, was seeping into her subconscious. Ford wasn’t even fucking here, and he had somehow made her feel less than. He had been working all his life to feel equal to him, but that was his own cross to bear, and his own nail to hammer. Not hers.

He didn’t think much of letting go of her hand, in favor of grabbing her chin. Tears made trails down her dirty round cheeks, eyes wide. He thinks she stole his breath for a minute. 

“Now listen here Doc, you ain’t gotta do this alone. I never wanted you to do this fucking alone, that’s not why I told you everything.” He takes a step forward. “I told you everything because I know we can figure this out.” 

She sniffles, moving closer, leaning into the warmth of his hand. Her own curled up into his dirty tank top, journal forgotten on the floor in favor of comfort. 

“It’s gonna take some time.” She mutters under her breath, only answered by the laugh in his chest. 

“Don’t I fucking know it Doc.” A pause. “But… I mean at least we got each other, right?” 

A smile blooms on her face, her heart slowing under the struggling reassurance Stanley was attempting to bring. 

“Mmm, yeah.” Sniffling, and nodding. “Ya, I have you Stanley.” 

“And I you, Doc.” 

He steps closer, encasing her in his large arms, her head making a home in his shoulder. He was warm, she noted, and strong under her withering confidence. 

His hand reaches up, knocking on her temple. “You can’t be calling me Stanley while we are upstairs, I hope ya know.” 

She nods in his chest. Only down here can he be Stanley to her now, even in her mind. 

[zekewavev2]

Hazbin hotel/Danny Phantom crossover? In this economy?? Yes

"Being King of all of Limbo and the infinite realms has its.. many weird perks. Meeting Lucifer and Lilith while he was still a prince was interesting, having the king and queen of hell see you as a son was NOT on Danny's bingo card for sure. Many rough years later, Lilith disappears and their daughter Charlie starts up a hotel meant for rehabilitation for sinners as Danny sets out to not only reunite with Charlie who he sees as a little sister but to also investigate the exterminations."

Meeting the residents of the hotel

Finally meeting Charlie after so many years felt nerve racking to Danny, sure Charlie always sent letters to him to keep in touch as Danny always responded back but It's hard to keep in touch when you have to tend to your kingly duties to your people and trying to keep another war from spewing out after Pariahs many years of tyranny.

Safe to say that Charlie was ECSTATIC to see Danny in person again and pulled on his arm like it was nothing, dragging him around the hotel.

Meeting the residents was very interesting, Vaggie was the first, she seemed tense, Danny could tell that she didn't trust him which he completely understood. He immediately could tell that she was a fallen angel but he kept his mouth shut, for that was her secret not his.

The bartender Husk was next, his lack of introduction and his uncaring nature spoke more than he verbally did, Danny could tell he didn't want to be here and it felt that Husk was forced to be here. Now Danny was a lil suspicious.

The pornstar Angel Dust was next and oh boy was he cut off guard, to be immediately called a Sexy Stud on introduction was WILD. But Danny knew that Angel was playing a suggestive role. He could tell that there was something so much more to Angel than he let on. So Danny being respectful, gently took one of Angels four hands and kissed his knuckle. "Well it's certainly my pleasure to meet such a great actor." Now it was Angels turn to be caught off guard. A now outplayed Angel was blushing mess.

The Cleaner Niffty next, Niffty was everywhere, crawling all over Danny like a spider while saying something about a new man being here. Niffty eventually asked if Danny was a "bad boy" which he declined nicely, eventually Vaggie pulled Niffty off of Danny.

The Demon Alastor was last, Safe to say that Danny's suspicions were right, this fellow reeks of mystery and evil. To energetically introduce himself to Danny made him even more suspicious of Alastor and that damn smile didn't help either. It was unpleasant and Awkward, Danny was grateful that the introductions finally ended.

[moody-alcoholic]

Kidnapped

John Price x reader

CW: You read the title right? break in, kidnapping, drugging, canon typical violence.

Part 2

You always thought John was joking when he told you, you might have to hide from people out to get him. He’s a soldier after all, not a crook. He’s out there doing his bit for queen and country, saving lives and fighting the bad guys.

It’s not like in the movies where there’s drugs or you’re on the run, he hasn’t broken the law. You live a simple life; you work, you cook, shop, keep the house clean. The only difference between you and any other person you know is your husband sometimes disappears for weeks at a time. Months if you’re unlucky.  

There’s missed birthdays and anniversaries, contact can be hard when he’s away. You fill your time by working overtime or hanging out with friends so when he’s home you can dedicate all your time to him. 

So you thought it was him when the slam of a door jolts you from your sleep. You open your eyes, picking up your phone to check the time. It’s almost 2am, not an unusual time for him to get back after a long deployment. 

But something is different, something is wrong. 

John is not the type of person to sneak through your house, he’s not the type of person to worry about not making noise. Whoever closed the door is walking through your house in silence. There’s no heavy drop of a duffle bag, no bounce of kicked off boots. No clank of keys in the bowl by the door. 

It’s so silent you can hear your own heartbeat picking up in your chest. 

Maybe it was the wind, maybe you forgot to close a window? Then you hear the creek on the steps, the pause in the intruder's stride. This is an old house with old floors. 

John told you want to do, he prepped you for this exact situation but somehow in the panic of the moment your mind is drawing a blank. Maybe you should pretend to be asleep, maybe then they will leave you alone. 

No, something tells you to move. You grab your phone slipping off your bed onto the floor. In the basement there’s a storm room, although living in the UK you don’t have much use for it, John refurbished it to a panic room. He keeps his ‘not-so-legal’ weapons in there, only you and him know the code. 

You’re forgetting everything he taught you, all you can think about is making sure you don’t lose your phone and making it to the garage. You pull yourself up to your feet, your hands are shaking as you make it to the door. You crack it open holding your breath. 

“I think we need to go up a floor.” 

“Ugh, it’s going to be a pain to get her out of here.”

It’s two people, and they’re clearly after you. Your heart is hammering in your chest. You wait until you hear them start up the next flight before sneaking down to the ground floor. You can feel tears well up in your eyes. 

This can’t be happening, why are people after you? What did John do? 

You make it into the kitchen, closing the door behind you. You make sure to hold the handle down so there is no audible click before you let it go. Maybe you should run, just call the police. John told you not to though. Call John, get to the safe room.

It takes you two attempts to open the contacts app on your phone. Your hands are shaking, your fingers feel numb. Eventually you manage to click on his number bringing the phone up to your ear as the call rings out. You make it over to the backdoor that leads into the garage. 

“Come on, come on, John pick up.” You whisper hearing the shake in your voice, as you fumble for the back door key on the rack. It feels like you’re making too much noise. 

The call goes to the answerphone. “Fuck, John.” Frustration boils in you, why is he not picking up?

You find the key. The frustration is replaced with relief as you fumble pressing it into the keyhole. 

You dial his number again as you go into the garage, you can see the false wall of tools John hid the door behind. You’re rushing towards it as you pull the facade back revealing the slim door, into the meter-by-meter room. 

“Hey!” You turn seeing a figure in the dark you don’t recognise.

You forgot to lock the kitchen door. 

You throw yourself into the space. It’s too late someone grabs your arm. You scream and fight as they pull you back. Your body falls to the floor, you drop the phone. 

“NO!” you scream as a hand claps round your mouth. There’s another person now they’re shouting at each other, at you. You kick, and flail as hands grip you, fingers digging into your skin. Tears stream down your face, you feel a sharp slap across your cheek. 

The hand leaves your mouth and you scream as loud as you can. Even in your ears the scream sounds foreign. It’s real fear, you’re screaming for your life.

A wet rag is placed over your nose and mouth. It smells rancid, after a few breaths your head starts to swim. The second pair of hands grip your ankles. Suddenly you don’t have the strength to fight. Adrenaline pulses through you, you try to dig your heels into the ground. 

For a second you free one of your legs slamming your foot flat on the ground.

“Fuckin’ bitch!” 

An arm comes round your neck squeezing tight. You can’t breathe, you can't suck in air. Your head swims, your body goes limp. You try to squirm but it's no use. Your last though is of John, you hope you haven't let him down.

____

Part 2

[lila-went-missing]

Saw you want to write Clarisse x Reader and I NEED more clarisee x reader fics SO!

Can you a Clarisse x reader of when Percy broke her spear and just like readers reaction to the her scream and just very angsty but very fully at the same time! Pls and thank u!

I swear on my life reverse hurt/comfort is one of my favorite things to write on this planet. Also, I feel like it’s worth mentioning that Dior said she literally BLEW OUT HER VOICE when she did that scream?!?! She never fails to amaze me.

This got a bit sadder than intended but it's not too bad. Also, sorry this took so long, I had a math test, two essays, and a debate, on top of personal shit. But I FINALLY got it finished.

My Love is Waiting For You to Come Home

Warnings: Slight violence, mild angst, hurt/comfort, cursing, small amounts of blood, mentions of wounds, lmk if I left anything out.

Pair: Clarisse La Rue x Fem!Apollo!Reader

For the first time in what felt like forever, capture the flag was going great. It had been a long time since the red team had won, but you were actually doing really well. You were up in a tree close to the flag, shooting anyone who got too close with your arrows. They weren't sharp, but they had enough of a point to hurt.

Clarisse was hunting in the woods below you. You'd occasionally catch sight of her from the place you were perched on your branch. She always looked amazing like this. Hair pulled back, armor on, spear in hand. She was in her element, and you'd be lying if you said it wasn't extremely attractive. The way she looked so tough, her lucky red bandanna tied around her bicep.

Anyone else would say she looked terrifying. But to you, she was the most beautiful person you'd ever laid eyes on. You were the only one who got that side of her.

It wasn't long before she disappeared again, hunting down anyone who dared to get close to the flag or your tree. She had mentioned something before the game. Something about revenge on the new kid. She didn't go into detail about said revenge, but you new it wouldn't end well for someone.

You didn't move from your tree, assuming her and her siblings had everything handled. And they did, for a while at least. You had shot down another four people by the time you heard your girlfriend scream in a way that genuinely terrified you.

Jumping down from the tree, you raced to the sound as the conch horn blue. You made it in time to see her storm off as the blue team carried the flag over. Just before she made it out of sight, you saw the spear in her hand. Or rather, what was left of it.

Oh gods. You thought.

You tipped your head back, letting out a breath before turning in the direction she went. You found her in the arena, tearing dummy after dummy into shreds. You let her go at it for a while, watching from the doorway.

Eventually, you slowly walked towards her, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Clar.." You whisper.

She jumps, turning quickly, ready to knock you into the ground before relaxing. All of the tension disappears from her face, her bottom lip trembling. You reach forward, taking the sword from her hand and tossing it into the rack haphazardly.

"I- fuck.." She drops her head forward, breathing hard.

"Come on.. it'll be okay." You lead her towards your cabin, knowing all of your siblings would be in the infirmary tending to peoples wounds. You can see cuts and bruises on her arms, giving you a feeling that her back will be even worse. You make sure to grab the pieces of her spear on your way out.

On the way to your cabin, her eyes don't leave the ground. Your hand stays on her back the the whole walk, not leaving even as you open the door for her.

She sits on your bed, putting her head in her hands. The broken weapon lays on the foot of your bed as you sit next to her. Her breath shakes with her body.

"Let me clean you up, okay?" She nods, at your words.

"Okay.." Her voice is smaller than you've ever heard it before. You lean forward and pull her shirt over her head, confirming your suspicions about her back. An angry red covers almost the entirety of her tan skin, small amounts of blood leaking from a few spots.

You hover a hand over the scrapes and cuts, a warm glow emanating from your palm. Her wounds slowly heal as her muscles relax. Your heart breaks for her every time you hear her wince or feel her breath hitch. Your free hand reaches forward, grasping hers. A few small scars form over the area, but nothing that won't fade.

You lean your chin on her shoulder when you finish, wrapping your arm around her front. Her other hand reaches up to hold your wrist.

"I love you.." You whisper into her ear.

She hesitates, not speaking for a few moments. When she does her voice is as shaky as her body.

"That was the only thing- the only proof he-" She can't finish either sentence. You can feel her holding her breath as if she's trying not to cry.

"I know, my love. I know." Your lips press into her shoulder. "I'm gonna talk to some Hephaestus kids, I think there's a couple of Hecate kids in the Hermes cabin. I'll do everything I can to fix it."

Her whole body shudders. She's never had the best relationship with her dad. He'd always said that she should've been a son. That spear was the only acknowledgement she'd ever gotten from him. And now it was broken.

A few tears slip down her cheek that you pretend not to see.

"It'll be okay, Clar'." Your arms tighten around her as her head leans into you.

"Thank you." She mutters. If it wasn't for your close proximity you probably wouldn't have heard it at all.

"You deserve someone to care about you.. I'll be damned if I don't do everything I can to be that person."

"I love you. So much." Her voices is so soft, so gentle.

"I love you more." You're not sure how long you sit like that, but it's long enough for your legs to go numb. You can bring yourself to care as she looks so comfortable. She's always had to fight for her dad's love. It gets tiring after you do everything you can to get no recognition. It was nice to know she had someone. If she didn't have anyone else, she would have you.

Eventually you moved positions to her laying on your chest. Your hand rubs up and down her back as her wrap around your waist. She traces patterns across your skin with her finger tips. It's not long before you're both sound asleep in each other's arms. She would never have to fight for your love, it was just there, ready for her when she came home.

[cherry-burst]

Hiya 😊 I'm not sure if you're taking requests but I had an idea for a Zayne one shot, MC and him shower together with him initiating, starts off gentle and eventually gets heated🔥😗😂 I was thinking could even work as a pt. 2 to the Rest Easy fic 🥰 Let me know what you think! 🤗

Hey! Thanks for the ask. And for sure! I like that idea ❤️

Zayne x F!MC “I Owe You”

Love and Deepspace

Smut🔞MDNI | Fingering | Shower Sex | 3.4k Words

AN: This is a companion fic to “Rest Easy” but you do NOT have to have read it to understand or enjoy this one. Cheers!

The sun was setting in the sky as Zayne made his way home. The news on the radio reminded him that there was a possibility of a snowstorm overnight. That didn’t concern him. But, his girlfriend urged him to get home before the snow started to ensure his safety. It was supposed to be a long weekend after all, and the two of them had lots of things planned. She, understandably, didn’t want anything to stand in their way.

When he finally made it home, he removed his coat and scarf and hooked them onto the coat rack. The house was tidy, the curtains were drawn, and the dishwasher was running. He toed off his shoes and called out for her. 

She didn’t respond so he walked farther into the house. She had to be home, her shoes and purse were sitting by the front door. 

“Where are you?” He asked curiously when she didn’t respond. 

Zayne’s footsteps echoed in the hall as he made his way to the bedroom. The sound of the shower made him realize why she hadn’t been responding. The rushing sound of the water would have muffled any noise beyond their bedroom.

Now that he was in the room, he knocked gently on the ajar door. Steam rolled out from the crack as it creaked open from his touch. 

“I’m home.” He spoke into the attached bathroom. 

“Oh!” he heard her voice, jarred by the sudden intrusion. Zayne was amused by how little was needed to startle her. He was sure he could put effort into scaring her and make her scream like an actor in a horror movie that was getting chased if he tried. The shower curtain crinkled, and her head popped out from behind. “Welcome home!” She smiled at him, conditioner sitting on her hair. 

Zayne smiled, removing his watch and glasses and placing them on the nightstand. “I made it back before the snowstorm hit, like you requested.” 

He mentioned this casually, but secretly he wanted the praise for listening to her request. He looked back at her as he untucked his shirt from his slacks. 

“You sure did,” She smiled at him. Her eyes lingered on him for a long moment before she asked, “Would you like to join me?” she said with a flirty quirk of her brow. 

“In fact, I would love to join you.” He agreed immediately, stepping into the steamy bathroom while undoing his tie. His day hadn’t been particularly stressful, but seeing her was always a stark contrast to anything mundane. She lit up his life, she was the color on the page, the light in a dim room. 

She disappeared back into the shower to rinse off. The condensation fogged the mirror as the heated water billowed mist over the top of the shower curtain. The steam made it harder to breathe and caused his hair to stick to his face. 

Zayne unbuttoned his shirt as he walked over a pile of clothes she’d discarded on the floor. Her bra was on top of the pile, and his tie quickly joined it. He shrugged off his shirt and froze when his girlfriend popped her head out again. 

“How was your day?” She asked him, her tone light and friendly as water dripped down her face and hair. She reached beyond the curtain with a wet hand and pressed against his stomach. 

Zayne inhaled at the gentle touch. “Not bad. It hasn’t been as busy lately. I only had three back-to-back patients,” He looked down as her hand continued to move until it reached his slacks. “The rest were spaced out,” He tried to keep his tone even, but when she hooked her fingers into the waistband of his pants and pulled, Zayne’s words faltered. “I had plenty of time to get my reports done before my next appointment.” He finished, his tone dipping lower. 

She pulled until Zayne was inches away from her face. “Oh? That’s good. I’m glad it hasn’t been too stressful for you.” Her gaze drifted down to his torso. “And how was your stitch removal?” 

Zayne angled his body so she could see where the old stab wound from weeks ago had fully healed. The stab wound he’d gotten from a feral patient had healed rather quickly despite its size. The healing process left a pink line on his skin, healing perfectly back into place. 

“It was fine. I did it myself.” He rubbed the scar and then looked up at her. “How was your day?” 

He began to unbutton his slacks, the steam of the shower making him sweat. Now he really wanted to rinse off. 

“It was fine.” She answered just as Zayne began to enter the shower with her. She pressed her lips together as her eyes wandered over his tall frame. “I’m glad it's finally the weekend. I’m ready to spend time with you.” 

Zayne kept his eyes on hers, stepping closer to place his hands on her waist. He hoped the blush he was sporting could be misconstrued for being hot in the humid air the shower caused. 

“I’m ready for that as well. I know we split up the planning to keep things a surprise for one another, but I am rather curious about what you will have us do tomorrow since the snowstorm may make us homebound.” 

He tugged on her waist and his girlfriend swapped places with him under the shower head. Zayne faced the spray of water and ran his fingers through his hair, soaking himself. Hot steam rose off his body, the scalding water making his pale skin tinge pink. 

“I planned some alternate things just in case one of my ideas fell through.” She answered, her hands squeezing water out of her hair. 

Zayne was so lost relishing in the heat of the shower, that he was surprised by a sensation on his back. His girlfriend was rubbing a washcloth over his shoulder blades, soapy suds bubbling over his skin in its wake. 

He let out a small ‘hmph’. “Are you going to wash me?” He said in an amused tone. 

He twisted to look at her but was quickly pushed to turn back around by her smaller hand. His brows rose. 

“Only if you stay still.” She admonished. 

Zayne let her lather up his back with the floral soap, the suds slowly dripping down to his thighs. Her other hand smoothed down his spine, slowly inching down until she was holding his waist, then moving lower. 

Zayne’s heart rate spiked at the touch. He took a deep breath as her hand crept down brushing over his backside. “I see now. You have ulterior motives. And here I thought you just wanted me clean.”

“Of course, I want you clean. That's my only motive.” She responded, her hand running over the curve of his ass. 

“Mhm,” Zayne responds, letting her do as she pleases. He grabs a bottle of shampoo from the ledge, her bottle, and administers a healthy dollop of strawberry scented soap into his hand.

As his girlfriend's hands wander, her fingertips find their way to the pink scar on his side. She runs her digits along the line, his abs flexing with her touch. The sensation caused a gasp to catch in Zayne’s throat. 

She asks “Does it hurt?”

He shakes his head “Just sensitive is all. It's fine” He scrubs his hair with her shampoo, then steps under the water to rinse it out. 

She moves the washcloth over his neck while her hand rests on his side. 

“You know,” He began, his tone dipping as the washcloth carefully ran down his right arm. “I recall a moment when I said I owed you.” 

Her hand paused. That was weeks ago, of course. The two of them had been careful as his wound healed, making sure not to indulge in too many bedroom activities so he could heal quickly. They were also not always home at the same time. It had been a while since they’d been properly intimate and Zayne was keen on taking advantage of that this weekend. Starting now. 

“You don’t owe me anything,” She spoke quietly, the washcloth moving up and down his side. 

Zayne turned to face her, the shower water washing the suds off his back. “Oh, but I do.” 

His fingers slid over her collarbone as he allowed his gaze to lock onto hers. Her pupils dilated under his watch, his hand cupping her cheek to angle her face to meet his. The kiss ignited a deep ache in Zayne, an ache only she could satisfy. He moved to kiss her at a new angle as her hands came up to wrap around him, the washcloth plopping to the bottom of the tub.

She pulls back first, the conditioning treatment in her hair sliding down her forehead. “I need to rinse off…” She was breathless sending a ping of confidence through Zayne. 

They swapped places so she could get the brunt of the shower’s hot water. The wall tiles were dewy with droplets as Zayne helped her rinse the conditioner out of her hair. He squeezed and rang out extra water until it ran clear. 

“Thank you,” She said, rubbing her eyes free of water so she could see. 

Zayne’s lips pressed against her neck as his arms wrapped around her from behind. “You’re very welcome.” His voice was a whisper against her skin. He licked at the warm water droplets on her skin and left heated kisses trailing to her ear. 

His girlfriend took a deep breath as he kissed her neck again, and again. Water flowed down their bodies in rivets. The scent of the mixed soaps on her body flooded his senses. 

His large hand moved up her ribs to run along her chest. She gasped when his fingers grazed her nipple. Zayne’s lips moved from her neck to her shoulder then back again while he teased her sensitive skin with his fingers. He rubbed, pinched lightly, and then squeezed her breast until she was practically panting. Water ran down between her cleavage, slipping past her navel and then lower to where Zayne wanted to go. 

“Z-Zayne.” She gasped as his hand swapped to the other side of her chest. 

His lips curled into a small smile as he kissed the sensitive skin beneath her ear. “Yes?” 

“Mm… more.” She answered. 

“More?” He used both his hands to cup her breasts, teasing both nipples with his fingers. 

She moaned, her head pressing back into his shoulder. Despite all the water and soap, his girlfriend still smelled like herself. It was a deeply comforting scent to Zayne, something he could never truly put his finger on but was uniquely her. She always smelled like it, even after a scrub down in the shower.  

“More, uh,” She tries to correct. “Lower,” her backside presses against his obvious arousal. 

Zayne hums like he’s thinking about it, his fingers still busy with her chest. “Lower?” He asks, his sultry voice right in her ear. “On your stomach?” He teases. 

She nods eagerly. “Yes, and then… lower.” 

“Even lower than your stomach?” He feigns innocence, yet he complies. 

One hand slowly follows the water droplets that rush down her torso. He moves past her navel and dips lower and lower still. His fingers follow the valley of her body. She’s already slick, so his finger easily enters her with zero resistance. 

His movements are slow, exploratory almost, as he dips inside over and over. She parts her legs to give him easier access and Zayne adds a second finger. His lips press against her neck, his teeth tantalizingly scraping the skin. He loved the way his girlfriend easily unraveled for him. Even something as simple as a kiss made her eyes linger on him for just a moment too long, making him very aware of how much he affected her. She affects him too, even when she’s not there thoughts of her flood his mind day in and day out. 

He eases his finger out of her to give her clit unfettered attention. He circles and rubs until she moans for him. Zayne couldn’t help but press himself against her backside, to get some kind of friction as she made noises like that for him. 

“I have a fever,” She says, her hips rocking with the motion of his fingers. 

“Oh?” Zayne plays along. “Why do you say that?” He continues his ministrations.

She gasps, pressing her hips into his hand. “I’ve become so hot.” 

Zayne’s teeth trail along her neck until he whispers in her ear. “It seems I need to examine the patient for signs of overheating.”

She whimpers when his fingers enter her again, two of them rubbing just the right spot to make her legs quake. The water rushed down between them, keeping them both from drying off. Her hand came up, reaching for the back of his head to hold him to her neck. Zayne’s hair dripped onto her collarbone, his lips latching onto the sensitive skin below her ear. 

“Oh fu-... Zayne,” She moans his name so beautifully. 

He breathes heavily, his lips grazing her shoulder. “Nothing abnormal,” He says, his other hand still cupping her breast. “Maybe if I go deeper,” He adds in a sultry whisper. 

He presses his fingers deeper and his girlfriend's knees almost buckle. He keeps her upright squeezing his arms against her while he keeps up his ministrations. 

“Right there,” She rocks her hips in time with his fingers pumping motion. 

“Ah, yes. I see the problem here.” Zayne teases in a low voice.  His girlfriend whimpers as he removes his fingers. “You need something more, is that right?” 

She agrees, “Yes, yes! Something more,” She leans all her weight onto him. 

Zayne gently eases her forward. “Put your hands on the wall,” His voice is oh-so low in her ear. He likes how goosebumps rise on her skin when he does this, even when the heat of the water makes it sweltering. 

His girlfriend places her hands on the wall like he instructed. Zayne’s large hand engulfs her thigh, easing her leg up to rest on the ledge of the tub. His heart hammered away in his chest, his breath coming heavier than before. 

His girlfriend arches her back to give him better access. She peers over her shoulder and is met with a kiss from Zayne. He kisses her languidly, the tip of his cock teasing her entrance. He stands behind her, his body curling around her protectively while he enters slowly. 

She’s wet enough to accommodate him, so Zayne doesn’t stop until he’s all the way in, pushing and rocking until she takes all of him. 

His girlfriend inhales deeply. He's thick, so thick, inside her. When he starts thrusting, so slowly, rocking his whole body into hers, it makes her heart feel like it's falling. The adrenaline pumping through her veins makes her rock back eagerly into his hips. She tries to quicken the pace, but Zayne is determined to keep it achingly slow.   

He holds her with his strong arms, wrapping around her to keep her upright. She tosses her head back, her wet hair pressing against his shoulder. He knows good and well that if he keeps this slow, deep, pace, it’ll make his girlfriend come undone twice as fast. Then, after she’s already come once, he will go faster to make her come again. He remembers the first time they slept together, how many hours it took of them kissing and touching before he ever entered her. The slow exploratory movements made her rush to the finish line so much faster than the other times when he went as quickly as she begged him to go. He always kept this in mind. 

“Zayne,” She moaned his name and he almost lost his composure. 

He buried his face in her neck again, one hand sliding down to press against her clit as he fucks into her. He’s breathless, thrusting into her over and over while her walls flex against him. The water of the shower now flows behind them, pools then rushes past their feet to the drain. The steam from the hot water kept them from freezing. But then again, Zayne never minded the cold. 

She pants, open-mouthed, while her hands slide down the wall. Zayne keeps her steady, seeking that tell-tale sign she's close. Sweat easily pebbles on his brow due to the humid climate and his physical exertion. His lips seek the pulse point on her neck, littering gentle sucks along her neck and ear.

Her head tosses back, pressing into his firm shoulder. It detaches his lips from her and prevents his groans from being muffled. Their mixed sounds echoed off the bathroom tile, growing louder as their mixed pleasure grew to a fever pitch. Zayne pressed his cheek against her wet hair, the scent of her shampoo overwhelming him. He held on to her body with a firm grip while his hips rocked into her again and again.

Her skin was warm in his embrace. Droplets dripped down the bridge of his nose as he sped up his pace. His girlfriend’s hands clawed up the slick tile wall as she warned him, “So.. close. I’m close!”

He kept his quick pace, keeping the perfect angle that was making her tremble in his arms. His hand moved back between her legs, rubbing her clit in quick succession. He knew he found the perfect pace when she started freely moaning his name.

“I won't stop until you ask,” Zayne reassured her, his breathing heavy. Even if his stamina was starting to wane, he’d push his body's limits to make sure she got the climax he’d been working her so hard toward.

He kissed the side of her neck and pressed her clit harder. He couldn’t hold himself back much longer, his thrusting intensified, rocking her whole body. It was the perfect combination to send her over the edge. She arched her back, her hips rocking desperately to meet his. 

Zayne’s breathy moans grew louder as her pussy throbbed against his straining cock. Fuck, that was his favorite feeling. The way her walls tightened and pulsed against him. It was a dizzying sensation that filled him with a sense of accomplishment and pure lust. 

Too bad they were in the shower, Zayne wanted to push her forward and fuck her from behind while her back sloped sensually to the bed. Being confined to the shower at the moment, Zayne conceded to the situation and grabbed her hips. He pulled her into his thrust, the sounds of skin getting louder.

Once her pussy stopped fluttering, Zayne began seeking his own release. He held her tight, his biceps flexing as he squeezed his eyes shut. He had been holding himself off for so long, it was hard to relax and let his body find the release it craved.

His girlfriend, after having caught her breath, picked up on the fact that he was close. 

“Do you want to cum inside me?” She asked, her voice sultry. 

Zayne's stomach flipped at her words. “Yes,” He answers immediately. “Yes, Hh-” He moans into her ear. 

“I want you to…” She reached her hand back, dragging her nails through his wet locks. “I want you to cum inside me, Zayne. Please.”

Zayne groans, his thrusting becoming erratic. “I want,” He pants, “I want to-” he’s out of breath but his climax is imminent. “-to cum inside you.”

“I want it,” She moans, pressing her ass back against his thrusting. 

He curses, a rare occurrence for him, before his pleasure comes to a head. He closes his eyes, his hands gripping her body so tight while his cock throbs inside her. He’s still while his girlfriend rocks back into him prolonging his pleasure. Zayne holds his breath while waves of pleasure wash over him.

“Come on,” His girlfriend eggs him on. “That’s it.”

He finally takes a deep inhale as the most intense part of his orgasm subsides. It still feels so good inside her, though. He stays like this, his larger form curled around her in the hot shower while his cum seeps out and drips down her thighs.

He takes deep breaths while her fingers rub the back of his head. 

“I still owe you, technically.” He finally manages to speak. “I want to focus on just you.”

“Well,” She soothes him with her nails scratching gently over his scalp. “We have a nice long weekend to keep owing one another.”

[simplyraeblue]

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Bargaining Chip (Dabi x reader x Hawks)

!femreader x Dabi x Hawks idk what plot to write for this tbh WARNINGS/TAGS: MDNI, NSFW, swearing, inappropriate quirk usage (slight branding), smut, p in v, oral (m receiving), creampie, dabi claims you, hawks wants you, blah blah blah feelings with smut, use of "doll", use of "pretty" A/N: this was my lil birthday treat to myself so I wrote this Tuesday in a manic "I'm getting older" mind. i'll eventually write Dabi a solo one but something about these two together... shew. also my first threesome smut so hope it suits your fancy! word count: 3,015

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Hawks had made it his personal mission to gather intel on you. His primary objective, of course, was to get information on the League by following you. His hidden mission… soak in as much of you as he could. 

You were gentle, and kind, he’d even go so far as to say cute. How the hell had you ended up with the League of Villains? He’d watched you help an elderly woman across the street for God’s sake - not really villain behavior. 

As of late, he’s been allowing his curiosity to get the better of him. Sneaking into your apartment, rummaging through your things… and even wistfully stealing a few sniffs of your sheets, the scent of you lingering from the morning. Your life seemed utterly normal to him, nothing out of the ordinary. 

And yet, every other night he’d follow you to their hideout. A run-down warehouse that accommodated the League - a place he’d only been to once when Dabi had first questioned his loyalties. You looked out of place, like a sheep amongst wolves as you walked in casually through the front door. 

Hawks had toed the line of rushing in after you, every time he watched you disappear into the building. Were you in danger? Is there a chance you were forced to be here time after time? Nothing else made sense; you had no criminal record, no quirk, nothing tying you to the group. He couldn’t figure it out, and it was beginning to irritate him. 

It had been a month or so since he’d started following you in the first place, initially on edge but now unfazed by how close he’d fly to you. He had to talk with you, get you alone so that you felt safe to speak… but his training told him it was too risky. 

So, now here he was, giving up a night of surveillance to meet with Dabi. Kicking himself every mile he put between himself and your apartment - what if he missed something while he was gone? He’d be lying if he said he didn’t enjoy the little glimpses into your life he got, so normal and carefree. 

What he didn’t expect was to get to the building and find you.

Hawks paused at the door before peaking in the window to make sure it was safe. Instead, he froze at the sound of the moans spilling from your mouth, his eyes recognizing you instantly, even with your face fucked out from pleasure.

He’d half anticipated finding you in danger, in need of rescuing, but here you were – bouncing languidly up and down while straddling Dabi. Far from in danger. 

You were racked with overstimulation, Dabi working you up to your third orgasm as you groaned out his name, unaware of your peeping tom watching the scene unfold. “Fuck, please I can’t again.” You whined with your head thrown back, eyes screwed shut as you felt the burning in your stomach grow as hot as his flames.

“But you’re takin’ it s’ well, doll.” Dabi moaned into your tits as he used his hands on your hip to move your body himself. He refused to cum until you were too fucked out to even beg for it, until your body was limp from exhaustion. “Wan’ you t' cum on my dick again.”

A hot slap landed on the plush of you ass, leaving a burn shaped like a handprint to mark you as his. While you continued to use him, his cock hitting your cervix so deliciously, his eyes glanced at the time. He knew who should be outside the door, so it was no surprise when out of the corner of his eye he saw a fleeting pair of red wings.

Dabi started to rut into you now, even more feral with the idea that someone was watching how good he was making you feel, and your praises made it that much sweeter. “Oh yes – mph – Dabi, shit ‘m gonna cum!” You squealed out as your body started to tremble under his touch, your warm, wet walls clenching around his cock as you reached your high and lost yourself in it.

“That’s it, lemme feel ya.” Dabi’s lips found your neck, leaving scorching hot kisses on your skin as you ground your hips into his to ride out your release. 

At the sight of you coming undone, Hawks physically couldn’t restrain himself. He’d already shoved his hand past his waistband to palm his growing erection, but now he was fully fisting himself as he enjoyed the show. You sounded so sweet, a wicked little thing with someone else’s name on your lips – and he wanted it to be his name you screamed instead. 

As you collapsed into Dabi’s chest, your head finding purchase in his sweat-coated shoulder, you gulped down as much air as you could knowing it was certainly not over for you. Just as you were anticipating Dabi to switch positions and fuck you until his own orgasm, you felt his body shake with laughter.

“You gonna come in or not?” He spoke out loud, and your body stilled as you heard the front door creak open slowly. You couldn’t lift your head to see who it was, whether from exhaustion or embarrassment and assuming it was one of the League, but then Dabi answered your question himself. “Enjoy the show, Hawks?”

The name of the number two hero sent a rush of adrenaline through you, making you shoot straight up to look – sure enough, the winged hero sheepishly stood in the doorway, and you couldn’t ignore the tent in his pants as he rubbed his neck awkwardly.

“Did you know he was there?” You questioned Dabi, placing a light smack onto his chest in punishment because you already knew the answer. 

“Y’know, seeing as you’re in a bit of a… hurtful situation, I’d be glad to share with you. Help ya out, for the sake of our growing alliance.” Dabi shot Hawks a wicked smirk as he toyed with your tits, and you scowled at him. 

“Do I have any say in this?” Of course, Dabi shook his head no in response to you. 

“You’ll do as you're told, right?” He teased, nibbling your neck in a warning. While you knew he liked to play games, especially with Hawks, you were in no position to argue with him. You’d been on the receiving end of a temper tantrum once, and only once, but it was enough to know you shouldn’t test him.

“On one condition.” Hawks finally spoke up, breaking the tension between you and Dabi as you both looked over at him, a new confidence seemingly coming over his face. “I do this, you take me to Shigaraki.”

So… you’ve been demoted to a bargaining chip. How lovely.

“Deal.” Your jaw dropped at Dabi’s answer before you felt him lifting your ass from his lap, pulling his cock free from you in the process. Hawks wasted no time stalking over the couch as Dabi practically handed you off to him. 

“Wait, wait.” You held your hands up, glancing between the two men both looking at you with lust. “Only if Dabi is still a part of this.”

“Who do you think is gonna fuck your mouth, doll?” Before you could even register what was going on, Dabi forced you onto all fours on the carpet. 

While he lightly tapped your wet lips with his tip, Hawks stripped himself of his pants and you sucked in a breath. He was… bigger than you would’ve thought for someone with his ego, assuming his bravado was overcompensating. You peered over your shoulder to watch as Hawks knelt behind you, his hand kneading your ass and practically drooling at the sight of your wet cunt dripping onto the floor.

Hawks would be lying if he said he hadn’t thought of this exact sight before. Whenever he’d traipse into your apartment, smell your scent everywhere, even rummage through your underwear drawer and examine some of your more… delicate panties. You had overwhelmed him since the day he first laid eyes on you; sweet, innocent, good enough to take a bite out of. 

“Are you gonna hurry up or are you too scared?” Dabi taunted Hawks as he forced your mouth open with his thumb, pressing down on your tongue before pushing his leaking tip past your lips. 

“Shut up, it’s been a while.” Hawks bit out, taking his lower lip between his teeth as he teased your hole with the tip of his dick, almost losing himself at the warm slick coating your folds. With the first nudge into your cunt, he shuddered. God, you were fucking tight. So tight and warm and wet that he was cursing himself for feeling all too good too quickly. “Ah fuck, feel s’ good, pretty. Your cunt is already milkin’ me, taking me in like a good girl.”

Dabi moaned as he pushed your head down on his cock, your nose brushing against the trimmed white pubes at the base while his tip hit the back of your throat. You were focused on your breathing, fully attentive to Dabi until Hawks found himself sinking into you with one quick thrust. The feeling of Hawks bottoming out had you moaning around Dabi, the vibrations sending a shiver through him. 

“That’s right, doll, take both of us at the same time. You’re so good at getting your holes used.” Dabi groaned out as his fingers knotted into your hair, using the leverage to pull and push your head up and down his aching cock that was practically twitching with every suck of your lips.

Your muffled moans filled the room as Hawks began to brutally plow into you from behind, gripping onto your hips hard enough to leave bruises as he bullied his dick into you. The hero was already gasping for breath at how good your cunt felt with every thrust – and he was pretty sure you felt good too from the noises he heard you trying to make with a cock stuffed in your mouth. Every time you moaned, or shuddered, his cockiness grew. He’d be the one making you scream his name this time.

“Feel – hah – heavenly wrapped around me. Like this is what y’ were made for.” Hawks pressed a hand to your back and pushed down lightly to increase your arch, hitting your gummy walls with more force now and quickly finding your g spot and abusing it. 

With eyes watery and drool seeping from your mouth, you looked up at Dabi and he thought it had to be the sluttiest sight. Your eyelashes wet with tears and face flushed, he wanted to memorize this visual so he could keep it forever. He brought a scarred hand up to your chin, cupping it with a mixture of care and roughness as he grinned down at you. 

“Such a good girl, my good girl y’know that?” Dabi murmured to you as your head continued to bob up and down, drool now leaking down to his aching balls before your eyes fluttered shut at a mean thrust from Hawks. “Seems you’re doin’ good, Hawks. Makin’ my girl feel good. Now let’s see if you can make her cum again.”

Hawks had already made it his personal mission, desperately wanting to feel your walls tighten around him, but the challenge from Dabi made him all the more eager to push you over the edge. “Did ya hear that, pretty? ‘m gonna make you cum real good, okay?” Hawks whispered breathily as he began to barely pull out and thrust back in just to focus on your g spot, one of his hands slipping around your waist to deftly find your clit and rub circles around the sensitive nub.

You moaned around Dabi’s cock as you felt your release approaching quickly, your body tensing more with every thrust of Hawk’s cock against your sensitive spot. As you looked up at Dabi, fucked out eyes struggling to focus on his mouth agape in pleasure, you watched as drool dribbled from the corner of his mouth to roll down his abdomen, his face twisted in an expression that you so rarely saw from him. 

You were so close, the feeling of being stuffed full from both sides leaving your nerve endings buzzing with pleasure as Dabi fucked your face and Hawks bullied his cock faster into your cunt. The sight of Dabi opening his mouth wide, exhaling your name, snapped the knot that had been tight in your stomach, and soon you were loudly moaning around Dabi’s cock and clenching around Hawks’ dick as your release crashed over you, much harder than the last few today. 

Hawks hissed as he felt your walls tighten around him like a vice grip, all but stalling his thrust with how tight you’d gotten as you came around him. It wasn’t long after feeling your orgasm that he had his own ramming into him, causing him to quickly pull out and spray your slick folds with his sticky cum. He watched as his cum dripped down and off your clit, committing the sight to memory. 

“Shit, couldn’t even fill ‘er up.” Dabi groaned before he pulled you off his dick, and while you gasped for breath, he wrapped his arms around your legs to spin you, aiming your dripping cunt towards him before he plunged himself deep inside.

“Ah, fuck Dabi!” You yelled out as his tip kissed your cervix, your body still sensitive from your orgasm. You now looked up at Hawks through a tear-glistened gaze and found him nodding at you encouragingly with his brows furrowed and a soft smile on his lips.

“Did s’ good, pretty.” Hawks cooed as his thumb swiped across your lower lip, prodding the digit past your teeth before you wrapped your mouth around it and sucked. “Gonna take his cum, hm? Gonna let him fill you up?” You whined as you nodded, and Hawks smiled before placing a kiss on your lips as his free hand pulled your head in to nuzzle your hair. He felt like a maniac when he took a deep inhale of your shampoo, but to his heart’s dismay, it was overcome by a smokey scent, no doubt from the stitched man himself. 

“Fuck, take all my cum, doll. Be a good girl and milk it out of me.” Dabi’s moans grew louder, his thrust sloppier as he bottomed out before his cum started to shoot from his tip, painting your cervix white. You groaned at the feeling of his cock twitching and sputtering inside of you, feeling so warm and full of his cum that you could melt into a puddle. 

As Dabi stilled inside of you, coming down from his orgasm, Hawks used his tongue to explore your mouth. Your soft, plump lips were addicting, and after watching you for so long he had begun to wonder if he’d ever feel them. Now that he knew, he didn’t want to stop. After this, he’d keep tailing you, day after day just to get a glimpse of your pretty face. Maybe he’d start going late at night and praying you would leave your patio door unlocked.

He wanted to be with you, hopefully fuck you get to know you, without Dabi around. 

“That’s my pretty girlfriend.” Dabi cooed as he pulled you up into an embrace, warm arms wrapped out your weak body. As Hawks heard the label, his heart sank – how was someone like you with someone like him? Surely, he was the better option.

No, now was not the time to get sensitive. He’d enjoyed himself, more than enjoyed, but Dabi’s offer now came crawling back into his mind. “Alright, we had a deal.” Hawks’ usual demeanor he reserved for the villain came smoothing back over his features. “You said you’d take me to see Shigaraki.”

Dabi rolled his eyes as he pulled out of you with a wet squelch, and you shuddered at the loss of him inside you. “Way to kill the mood, hero.” He snarked before scooping you up into his arms and carrying you to the couch, gently setting you down before covering your still-naked body with a blanket. “Don’t lie and tell me you didn’t enjoy yourself.”

Hawks glanced over to find you looking at him, pupils still blown out and panting breaths escaping between your lips. God, he wanted to take you away from here. Claim you as his own – but he had to focus on his objective. 

“Sure, any man enjoys a wet cunt to stick their cock into.” Hawks’ response came out more tense than he meant it to, and Dabi’s eyebrow perked at the obvious lie. 

“Whatever.” Dabi waved him off, and you huffed in response before rolling over to turn your back to the both of them. “As long as she still prefers me, that’s all I care about. She is mine after all.”

Dabi had never once called you his, let alone put the label of girlfriend on whatever the two of you had going on. You were almost sure he was only saying these things to get a rise out of Hawks, using you as leverage. But you had a little secret hope that he was being honest. Otherwise, you’d gone and fucked the big bad villain for nothing. 

And yet, even after Hawks had left (heart aching more than it should), Dabi still pulled you into him. He still kissed the top of your head, still whispered praises that he’d deny in front of anyone else, and still… called you his. 

He’d never tell you out loud, God forbid he’d go completely soft, but when he first met you… he was awestruck. Dabi thought that you were too beautiful for this cruel world, too innocent like a delicate flower, and yet you stuck around. You were like a salve to his burns, cooling down the anger inside of him until he became a puddle in your arms. 

He’d never say it out loud; but he was in love with you. 

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link to my master list here

[tsukumomei]

—ADDRESSING THE DIVORCE ALLEGATIONS

ft. Yukimiya Kenyu x Actress! Reader

summary: being in a high-profile relationship brings immense support from fans and the public, but it also comes with its fair share of fake news. While your husband, a perfectly reasonable person, wanted to address the divorce rumors in a straightforward way, you had other plans–that somehow went sideways. cw: a little angst

Y/N L/N is undeniably one of the biggest actresses in this era. Her popularity skyrocketed when she married football star and model Yukimiya Kenyu, quickly becoming one of Hollywood's most favorite couples.

Currently starring as the leading woman alongside Michael Kaiser in the fast-paced police drama, FBI. So it came as a shock to millions of fans when suddenly her beloved character received less screen time, eventually written out of the show, left to “pursue a case” abroad and never returned.

The actress herself has released no statement about her unexpected exit from the show. Her instagram stories and tweets, usually filled with daily updates and lives, have been noticeably sparse.

As far as the public is concerned, Y/N L/N is on an indefinite hiatus.

That was, until you found yourself frozen in the middle of an aisle at the grocery store. You’d just spotted an unflattering photo of yourself on the cover of a popular magazine. It was clearly edited—your under-eyes had been intentionally darkened, making you look more tired than you actually were.

But that wasn’t what caught your attention.

It was the headline, written in bold, dark letters in quote:

“I’M TIRED OF US, IT’S OVER”

Next to it was a floating broken heart, with a photo of you and your husband split in half on either side.

The press really could brew the most bizarre rumors when they had nothing else to scoop. Well, you had basically made yourself an easy target, especially after disappearing without a word. Chuckling bitterly, you called out to your son.

“Kei, we’re going! Are you grabbing anything else?”

Peeking out from behind the magazine rack, you saw Kei reaching for a pack of frozen blueberries, presumably for his father. He was always so thoughtful.

“Just a sec, Mom,” he called back, stretching on his tiptoes to grab the pack from the second shelf. You started to step forward to help him but stopped yourself, remembering the last time you tried. He’d insisted that he was a "big boy" now—at six, he was more than capable of helping Mom. And he wasn’t wrong. Not only did he take after his father in the looks department, but his personality mirrored his too.

Finally, with a satisfied grin, Kei succeeded in his mission, grabbing the blueberries and turning to rush toward you. For just a split second, his gaze flickered toward the magazine you had been eyeing, but he quickly looked away when he saw you noticing.

___________________________________

The moment you pulled into the driveway, you noticed your husband standing on the front porch, dressed in a suit—likely just back from another shoot. He was talking on the phone, a confused expression on his face. When he saw the car, he muttered a few quick words to the person on the other end and ended the call.

He walked toward you, offering to help carry the groceries. It didn’t take long to figure out what had him in such a sour mood. As he took the bags from your hands, you caught a glimpse of his phone screen—it was the same photo you had seen earlier on the magazine cover.

___________________________________

He preferred to shut down the rumors as quickly as possible—but you had other plans.

“Come on, it'll be great!” you said, nudging him with a mischievous grin, trying to convince him to go along with your little scheme. How could he ever say no to you?

With a sigh, he gave in, shaking his head in disbelief. He couldn’t help but laugh, though, knowing you were always the one to stir things up.

“You’re unbelievable,” he muttered, but there was a hint of amusement in his voice.

You set your phone up on the kitchen counter, positioning it just right for the Instagram Live. Your heart raced with anticipation—this was going to be fun.

It didn’t even take five minutes before your Instagram Live was flooded with notifications. Your feed blew up with fans from all over the world, all wondering the same thing: where have you been? Why the sudden silence?

The comments started rolling in like a flood:

“Omg, Y/N, what happened?!”

“Are you really getting divorced?!”

“COME BACKKK”

“We miss you! Did you get kidnapped?!”

“If my ship is ending, I won't believe in true love anymore ”

“Did you and Kenyu split up or are you just pulling a dramatic plot twist?!”

“Y/NKen is over?”

“WHAT IS GOING ON??! I NEED ANSWERS”

“Y/N, why are you doing this to us?? We thought you were kidnapped by aliens or something!!”

“Please tell me you’re not turning into a ghost influencer. Don’t disappear for good!”

“Did you go on a secret mission and forget to update us?”

You couldn’t help but chuckle at the chaos in the comments. You had been away for a a few months, but it seemed your absence only made the fans eager—and more creative. This would definitely stir the pot.

Your husband, Yukimiya Kenyu, stood beside you, watching the flurry of activity on your phone screen. He rolled his eyes at the comments but couldn’t suppress the smile tugging at his lips. "You really like messing with them, don't you?"

“You know it,” you said, grinning. "It's been too quiet around here. Time to shake things up a bit."

You turned to him with an exaggerated frown, eyes widening in mock concern. "Hey, babe, have you heard?"

He looked at you curiously, his eyebrows furrowing. "Heard what?"

He passed his phone to you with a resigned sigh, clearly not sure what you were about to do next. You took it, squinting at the headline on the screen.

“What’s it say?” he asked, voice dripping with faux innocence.

You feigned a dramatic gasp, looking up at him with wide eyes. "I’m tired, it’s over between us…" you paused for effect, then continued, reading the headline in the most monotonous and nonchalant voice you could muster, “Yukimiya Kenyu couldn’t SEE l/n y/n’s worth.”

You could feel your stomach tense as you held back laughter, but your poker face was on point. You weren’t nominated for Best Actress for nothing.

Kenyu’s face went pale, playing along. His eyes widening in horror as he leaned in to read the screen. "Now that’s just personal.?!" he said, his voice barely above a whisper. 

You took a dramatic pause, then turned to him with a smirk. "I mean, it sounds like a you problem, babe."

He rolled his eyes, trying to hide his amusement. "Oh, come on," he muttered, shaking his head, though he couldn’t keep the smile from forming. "You know they’ll eat this up."

Just then, you saw the comments explode again:

“Is this for real?”

“We need a statement, NOW!”

“I CAN’T HANDLE THIS!”

“Plot twist: They’re both trolling us.”

You both burst into laughter at the absurdity of it all. The whole thing was ridiculous, but you knew the fans would love it. It was a mess, but it was your mess—and honestly, you were here for it.

“Alright,” you said, still chuckling, “Let’s give them what they want. A little clarity."

You turned back to the camera, making sure you were in frame with Kenyu. You were about to hand the phone back to him when suddenly, your teary-eyed son, Kei, appeared in the kitchen doorway.

“You’re getting a divorce?” he asked, his voice small, cracking with emotion. Tears welled up in his big brown eyes as he looked between you and Kenyu, waiting for an answer.

Both you and Kenyu instinctively shouted, “No!” at the same time, but before either of you could say anything else, Kei followed up with the most heartbreaking thing you’d ever heard.

“If you are, I’m going with Dad.”

Your heart dropped. It felt as if the air was suddenly knocked out of your lungs. You hadn’t even thought about how this joke, this silly stunt you had pulled, could affect him. You had never meant for things to go this far.

A lump formed in your throat as Kei’s tear-streaked face blurred in your vision. What have I done? The question echoed in your mind, spinning around like a whirlwind. Why did I think this was funny?

The weight of the situation crashed over you. You’d always been so focused on your career, on keeping up with the demands of the public, of the industry—and even your relationship with Kenyu had started to feel like a balancing act, constantly teetering between love and the pressure of being constantly in the spotlight. But Kei... Your son.

How much of him had I missed?

You hadn’t realized until now how little time you’d spent with him, how much he must have noticed, how much he must have needed you. The guilt gnawed at you like a hollow ache. The past few months had been a blur of shoots, interviews, and late nights trying to keep up with a schedule that never seemed to end. Every time you thought you could sit down with him, be present, something else came up. A new project. A meeting. Another crisis in the media. You promised him you’d play with him today, but you couldn’t even make it past five minutes before getting distracted by a tabloid scandal.

I’m a terrible mother.

Tears stung at the corners of your eyes, but you forced them back. Kei needed comfort, not a breakdown. He needed to believe that everything was going to be okay, and you would make sure of that. But how could you tell him that when you didn’t even know if everything was okay yourself?

“Kei,” Kenyu said softly, his voice low and calm. “You don’t need to say that. It’s not true, okay? Mommy and I are fine.” He gently wiped a tear from Kei's cheek, his touch warm and steady, then took his small hands in his. “You don’t have to choose between us. I promise, everything’s okay.”

Kenyu’s gaze softened, but there was a firmness in his tone as he added, “But you do owe your mom an apology. She’s not the one who made you feel like this, and she’s the one who loves you more than anything. You need to say you’re sorry, Kei.”

Kei noticed your heartbroken face. “I love you, mom. I’m sorry.” He looked down at his fidgeting fingers, nervously twisting them around each other. His voice trembled as he continued, “I only said that because I heard Grandma say you had my little sibling in your belly…” He paused for a moment, then added in a whisper, “I didn’t want Dad to be alone.”

The world seemed to freeze for a moment. You stood there, paralyzed. Kei’s words hung in the air, unsettling yet oddly comforting. He didn’t want his dad to be alone? How perceptive, how caring he was for someone so young. Kei, still standing there, looking up at you with wide eyes, waiting for reassurance. You knelt down to his level, wiping the tears from his cheek, your voice soft and full of love.

“Kei,” you whispered. “We’re not getting a divorce, okay? Mommy and Daddy love each other, and we love you so much. We’re always going to be a family. No matter what, we’re not going anywhere.”

Kei nodded slowly, his small face still clouded with uncertainty, but comforted by the warmth in your voice. You cupped his cheek gently, offering a soft smile, hoping to steady him.

But as you spoke to him, something else dawned on you. Kenyu hadn’t known about the pregnancy. The realization hit you hard—he was just as shocked as you were by Kei’s words. The baby. The little sibling Kei was already so protective of. Your husband didn’t know yet. It was supposed to be a surprise. Oh well.

Your phone, still set up for Instagram Live on the kitchen counter, sat forgotten in the chaos, buzzing with notifications and questions. The fans who had been eagerly awaiting answers? They had their scoop now.

The reason you went on an indefinite hiatus was because you were no longer able to perform the stunts required for your action drama role. You're pregnant after all.

Your son had just given them the exclusive. And that’s what you get for trolling.

___________________________________

if you enjoyed my work please consider donating on ko-fi ^^

[scorpioracha]

Dating Yoongi

We've finally got the dating Yoongi headcanons!! I'm sorry it took so long but boy is it lengthy so strap in. this is not proofread and im fucking exhausted so edits to be done eventually. if you enjoy reblog, like and leave a comment. cw: does contain smut and one kys moment

Your meet cute with Yoongi ended up being more of a meet awkward than anything. It was 3am at one of the many random convenience stores in Gangnam and you were exhausted, exhausted and hungry. You were doing a year in Seoul for your major and the timezones were really fucking you up. Puffy sleepy eyes,glasses on and a sleep mask resting on your forehead made quite the picture.

It was also quite the picture when you ran into a rack of honey butter chips and wiped out on the floor.

Full wipeout.

Legs up,gravity turned on its head wiped out.

Thankfully the only thing wounded was your pride, but you kinda wished you knocked yourself out so you couldn’t see the handsome man towering over laughing so hard his eyes practically disappeared and a gummy smile on his face. He had a cup of ice and one of those americano packets balanced in one hand and a helmet dangling in his other.

“...chana?”

“Huh?”you said in a daze. 

“Gwaenchana?”he purred in a low rumble. He looked at your lost expression and sucked in a breath.

“Are you okay?”It was a little clunky and half mumbled but you didn’t want to put this man through any more mental torment so you nodded quickly.

“Ne, na gwaenchana!”you replied and quickly scrambled to your feet, almost falling once again because your ankle decided now was the time to roll. He quickly reached out and steadied you, looking at you with so much bewilderment the whole situation felt comical. He looked at the hand that still rested on your arm and quickly pulled it away, you swear you saw his pale cheeks turn pink.

“Um…”he rumbled, looking at you with weary eyes. “stay”

You nodded with wide eyes as you watched this random man run around the convenience store and come back with a juice box and a random red pouch. He looked at you and held up each one.

“Bae juice”

He held up the red pouch. “Hong sam jelly for sukchwi…one moment”

He pulled out his phone and typed quickly. He held the phone to his ear and hummed.

“For hangover”he said, pointing to the two items again. Your eyes widened and you shook your head rapidly. You weren’t drunk. He definitely misinterpreted the situation and just smiled, giving you a smile and waving goodbye before disappearing into the night.

And what do you do when a pretty man buys you pear juice and ginseng jelly in a foreign country?

You fucking c o n s u m e it.

And the next morning when you woke up late to your 8:00am lecture, you just blamed the crazy night because wow what the fuck happened.

You spent the rest of your classes thinking about that handsome stranger. Maybe you did hit your head because WHY didn’t you ask for his name or his katalk? You could have done the whole ‘oh handsome young man, I need to pay you back’ kinda schtick but your brain decided to cosplay the very first windows computer and blue screen the minute you looked at him. stupid.

“Stupid” you groaned, trudging back to your dorm. You had been blessed—got accommodations—for a single room so it was just you and your twin sized 

Oh yeah, and your pining. 

Couldn’t forget about your pining.

You needed a drink. A good drink,some good food and some cartoons to get your mind off this random man. Within minutes you had a bottle of soju and a hefty platter of tteokbokki on the way. Maybe you’d go out for bingsu sometime this week with the girls from your lecture. They were sweet and treated you just like anyone else despite the racial and cultural differences, doting on you as their new maknae and always making sure you ate between classes. It was nice to be looked out for so thoroughly, especially when you were so far away from home. You pulled your phone out to text them when you got a notification that your delivery driver was already on the way.

Huh. they were already earning themself a tip. You stood eagerly by the door waiting and even though you were watching the app like a hawk, you jumped when the doorbell rang and scrambled to open it.

“Gamsahab-”you looked up and saw a familiar set of eyes. “...-nida”

“Soju?”he raises his brow in a way that says ‘again?’. You felt your face grow hot and shook your head rapidly. He just smirked and handed over your takeout bags.

Once again you fucked up,blanked and forgot to ask for his name.

 Damn pretty boy with his pretty eyes and his stupid smile.

It was months before you had seen him again. 

Time heals all wounds and you began to move on. You hung out more with your friends, went to karaoke,saw the sights of Seoul and slowly but surely felt yourself moving on.

It was on a rainy day in May where you found yourself at your usual convenience store. The weather went from sunny skies to torrential downpour within minutes and you had just gotten your hair done. You were looking for an umbrella but found yourself in the snack aisle. 

Blame it on the wind.

What you didn’t expect to find in the snack aisle were seven men bickering. 

You kinda just stood like 🧍🏾‍♀️ until one of them finally turned and god he was stunning 

“Yah, Yoongi-yah!! Move and let this lady through!”

The ‘Yoongi’ in question quickly scooted out of the way, mumbling about how they were all in the way. 

That mumble…

“Yoongi..”you whispered before you could even stop yourself. His gaze snapped up and for once you caught him off guard. His eyes flitted over you rapidly and his mouth opened and shut like a nutcracker.

“Soju girl,”he whispered. Then the moment was lost.

"na iroumi aniya(that’s not my name)” you huffed in annoyance. You know there was an honorific you were supposed to use somewhere in that sentence but your point still stood.

“You speak Korean”another boy said and god he was tall.

“Yes I speak Korean”you said, tilting your head up at him.

“Hyung, you said soju girl couldn’t speak Korean!”a voice laughs. You squint your eyes at this Yoongi who seemingly wanted the floor to swallow him whole. He stared at you like he had seen a ghost actually which wasn’t making things much better. The tall boy sighed and took a step forward, bowing even. 

“I apologize for my hyung,”he said solemnly. “He’s usually not this dumb. I’m Kim Namjoon and these are my bandmates. What’s your name?”

You smiled and returned the bow, happy to finally have some familiarity, both language and warmth.

“I’m y/n”you said. “I think me and your hyung have some catching up to do”

Yes, to say it was a meet awkward was the nicest way to put it.

It was a fucking train wreck of events if you were being completely honest.

You had exchanged info with Namjoon seeing as he spoke the most English and was the only one who didn’t 👁️👄👁️ at you which was nice and had quickly become good friends with one another.

Seeing that their leader liked you, the rest of the boys quickly followed suit and you suddenly had a much bigger friend group than you could even imagine.

Yoongi had become a lot more reserved in a way that was off putting to say the least. You’d only ever spoken to him twice before but there was something off.

you’d asked Namjoon about it during one of your study/music/kill each other from frustration sections and he just shrugged mumbling something about ‘hyung being busy’ 

you rolled your eyes and grabbed your stuff to find out yourself. That’s what you get for asking a dumbass.

Yoongi had been exactly where you’d expect him to be, crammed into one of the practice rooms with his headphones and laptop.

“Yoongi,” you said, tapping on his shoulder. He spun around in a startle and looked at you with a relieved sigh.

“Oh god”he breathed out, “I thought you were one of the maknae begging for food”

You couldn’t help but to smile, all the prior annoyance melting out of your pores and back to the depths of hell where they belonged. Talking to Yoongi was easy, that is when he was still talking to you.

“How do you know I'm not begging for food?”you smirked, taking a seat on the lumpy couch.

“Well, are you?”he asked, raising a brow. You shook your head and leaned back into the couch.

“You’re off the hook”you said, “but I do have a question” “Which is?” “Why have you been avoiding me lately?”

The room grew silent enough you could hear a pin drop. Cornered was the only way you could describe Yoongi. His shoulders scrunched up and he seemed to fold in on himself.

“No reason,”he said plainly.

Your eyes narrowed.

“So you have been avoiding me?”

His eyes widened.

“That’s not what I meant-”

“Then what did you mean?”you asked. Your patience was wearing thin and your heart was racing something ugly.

“I was trying to give you space”

“Space for what? I didn’t ask for space!”you snapped.

“Space for you and Namjoon!”he snapped back, folding his arms over his chest.

“Me and Namjoon?”you gagged. “The last thing me and Namjoon need is space, please collect your dongsaeng cause he won’t leave me alone!”

“Well he’s your boyfriend!”Yoongi threw back.

Huh.

“Huh?!”You shrieked. 

“It doesn’t take a genius to find out,”Yoongi continued, rolling his eyes. “So you can drop the naive act”

“Naive act—Yoongi, you think I'm dating Namjoon?”you asked. You felt like you were going to be sick. Namjoon wasn’t bad by any means, he was just so older brother coded it was disgusting.

“I don't think, I know,”he said. “You guys spend all your time together,you go on dates,you take naps together; it’s obvious”

“Well since you’re such a genius”You said, “How come you couldn’t tell that i’m in love with you?”

Huh.

“Huh?”he said, spinning around in his chair to fully face you. You ran a hand over your face and honest to god laughed.

“Idiots”you said in disbelief. “You’re all idiots”

“Hey-”

“I've been pining over you for months and this whole time you think i’ve been dating Namjoon”you said, shaking your head.

“You’ve been what?”Yoongi said. 

“Crushing on you”you emphasized, “You idiot”

“i..I don’t know what to say,”he said. You sighed and fully leaned back against the chair, feeling all the blood rush to your head from your bold confession. This isn’t how this was supposed to go.

“You can let me down gently for starters”you chuckled humorlessly.

“Let you down—what are you talking about?”he asked.

“Just reject me already!”You exclaimed, waving your hands frantically. You felt like a madwoman.

“Why would I reject you?”his eyebrows furrowed.

You were going to be sick.

“I’m going to be sick”you laughed, running your hands over your face and god were you crying?

“Why are you crying?”he rumbled softly, leaning in and wiping the tears off your cheeks. You just laughed harder, but that ended up turning into a sob because you were so tired. You weren’t expecting a fairytale but this wasn’t the turn you thought today would take. You felt yourself being pulled closer and you knew you should pull away, you knew better. It was all too much and he would just hurt you, but his hoodie smelled like coffee. His hoodie smelled like coffee and his hands were warm as they wrapped around you. You always wondered if he ran hot or cold, but he was neither; Yoongi was pleasantly warm. His hand had somehow wriggled between the two of you and rested on your cheek, rubbing the streaks where your tears trailed. His breath rose and fell in a steady rhythm and for a moment you felt weighless.

“What a mess, huh?”he mumbled, tracing his thumb over your temple. “I went and made all these assumptions…because I was afraid to say I love you”

“You love me?”you whispered. 

“Mm”he rumbled in affirmation. “You didn’t know?”

“No”you said, keeping your voice low, scared if you spoke too loud, the moment would disappear.

“I thought I was being obvious,”he said.

“I thought I was being obvious,”you said. You pulled your head back to look at Yoongi and that gummy smile was on full display.

“We’re both idiots”

Actually dating Yoongi went much smoother than the confession process.

In the early days, the two of you spent a lot of time in the genius studio doing parallel play, you’d work on your assignments and he would work on music. 

Obviously with many interruptions from the maknae line + hoseok, occasionally being prodded by Seokjin and Namjoon to eat,drink and get fresh air

Y’all needed to touch grass and they were sick of it

Being so close to the band in their early days formed an immeasurable bond between you all

But it also lead to a lot of sacrifices on your part that you weren’t prepared to make. 

There was the obvious like no posting about the boys on social media,nda’s up the wazoo,etc. This was all expected and you were willing to do so.

What you weren’t prepared for was how cruel the kmedia could truly be. You weren’t from here, you were a foreigner and that already put a target on your back. The fact that you weren’t thin or pale didn’t help one bit either. 

Thankfully, the boys and Yoongi reassured you in private. Namjoon did damage control and argued with the company to do more on your behalf, while Jimin and the maknae stood by your side like bodyguards wherever you went in silent solidarity. You were never alone. Jin dropped you off at university in the morning, along with Jungkook. Scolding the two of you to have a good day and to eat something that wasn’t chips. Naturally, Jungkook would bring you back once your classes were done and continued to gripe that even though he was older than you, he was still stuck in highschool.

You still hold this over his head to this date.

So thankfully, you had support. Support that if you didn’t have you weren’t sure where you would be honestly. It really felt like you all had become a little family, and being so far from home that was something you desperately needed.

Once the group got larger and was in a more stable position you better believe they all stopped holding their tongues, especially Yoongi. He could be a little hard to read at times but you were not expecting him to be getting himself into full on twitter wars on a burner account over you 💀

“Yoongi stop telling people to kill themselves”

“No”

Being in love with Yoongi felt easy, it was natural. He continued to take care of you in little ways whether it was packing your lunch,giving you transit fare or rubbing your temples when you were tired and falling asleep on him.

Our mans is definitely about that acts of service life. He loves quietly.

Pda made him want to die just a little inside but he wasn’t opposed to holding your hand. It wasn’t like he had anything to hide anyways, you guys were already public. 

He wasn’t the jealous type and although he’d never admit it, he loved how much you and the boys love each other. He’s got a bunch of pictures on his phone of you just in the dorms being domestic. You spent more time there than you did in your own dorm room.

 So although he doesn’t say it often, he shows it with every part of his being. The way his eyes sparkle when he sees you in the morning, his proud smile in your graduation photos. It also made his heart flutter that you got his dry humor and you dished it right back to him, smack in the middle of the maknae line teasing him and Jin about being old.

And when you learned Daegu Satoori from Taehyung to surprise him? Namjoon had to hold him back from proposing on the spot. And to think he ever thought you and Namjoon were dating.

Yoongi bits ✨tid bits about you and yoongi ✨

Yes Yoongi genuinely thought you were drunk and he wasn’t flirting(he got that nuerodivergent rizz)

When Yoongi told you the mint hair wasn’t real and washed it out you cried 🧍🏾‍♀️

You guys have two apartments together, one near Hybe and one in Daegu. You both prefer the apartment in Daegu because that means Holly gets to stay with you guys.

Everytime a new design for shooky it mysteriously appears in the apartment.

You guys have two cats per your request(a white one named sugar and a black one named gloss) the things Yoongi does for love

You guys have been happily engaged for the past year and he proposed in the most unromantic way possible 

NSFW

Baby, Yoongi is a switch with a capital S

Now I have never met a non kinky neurodivergent person and Yoongi is no exception. He enjoys a good power dynamic and has definitely explored kink in the past with previous partners so he’s experienced.

 But Yoongi does occasionally just like to fuck, no rules no dynamics. Just vanilla sex

He’s a lot softer than his image and he honestly likes the separation between the two for his own sanity. The fans think he’s this no nonsense hardass, but he’d much rather praise and reward you than dole out punishments.

He’s a softie at heart and finds a bit of bratty behavior to be cute so you can definitely get away with a lot. Not to say he’s a complete pushover but he definitely will let a good amount of back talk slide before he puts you in your place. It's almost infuriating how calm he is if you’re the type that brats in hopes of a punishment. He’ll just look at you and laugh about how cute you’re being before returning back to whatever he was doing.

It’s pretty hard to tick him off but also not impossible, the easiest way to get him to snap is to mess with him in the studio; especially if he has a deadline coming up. That's how you end up on your knees crammed under his desk not even allowed to suck his dick but just sit there and keep it warm while he works. The condescending mumbles and coos he lets out while stroking your head is enough to send you careening straight into subspace. “Just needed something in your mouth, huh?”he’d purr and gently drag his nails across your scalp

Tongue technology. We all know about it, but you get to experience this first hand at your beck and call. Yoongi is the first one to admit you’re spoiled and when you’re not being a brat, all you have to do is ask and he’ll be in between your legs. He could and has spent hours down there teasing your folds and giving you orgasm after orgasm until you can’t take it anymore.

Somnophilia. This is a kink that goes both ways for you guys but honestly he finds it really hot when you take what you need from him. Waking up groggy in the middle of the night to you fucking yourself on his cock is one of the quickest ways to get Yoongi whining and gripping the sheets. Bonus points if you tie his hands up or cuff them to the bed posts.

He’s not really a fan of quickies and prefers to take his time, but he’s not opposed to shoving you into a closet and getting you off on his fingers if you’re getting needy. He just wants to take care of his girl.

Speaking of his hands, they end up around your throat and in your mouth quite often. Whether you’re sucking or gagging on them, Yoongi makes good on this little fixation and makes sure you get your fill.

He’s down to being pegged. Somebody had to say it guys,🗣️ Yoongi wants something up his ass ‼️

Whether you have him bent over a table or you’re tied up and he’s riding you, Yoongi does enjoy penetration and he’s not ashamed of it. He likes how dazed and pliant you get when he’s bouncing on your strap all flushed and pink and whining. it’s a rush to his head and sends him over the edge faster than he can get a hand on himself.

He’s a fan of cozy aftercare and pillow talk. After you’ve both cleaned up and the bed is moderately clean, he’s off in the kitchen getting snacks and water so you two can cuddle and recap what you liked and disliked. He gets really affectionate after he cums so it usually dissolves into him mumbling praises and kissing all over your face before falling asleep.

All in all Yoongi is the best boy.

[icyowl]

The Eyes Tell Many Stories

Pairing: Gojo x reader

Synopsis: Six eyes wouldn't be what it is without you / Six eyes hasn't always been a blessing. The many times you helped Gojo master his eyes. 5k.

A/N: There might be some canon discrepencies, and that's okay. I have a thing for Gojo's eyes.

-- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- -- --

FOUR

You were the one who found him missing from a clan dinner at the age of four. The adults were busy drinking ancient and expensive alcohol, but who didn't care when a four-year-old wandered off? He was at the pond, head down and back to you, watching the koi dance and shimmer in the setting sun. Thoughts of sneaking up on him or pushing him in the water disappeared when your outstretched hand was snatched in a second's fraction and his tumultuous eyes clashed with yours, declared battle, and won the war, all in under a second.

"Satoru, stop it!" You yelled, failing to pull away from the beastly eyes and steely grip betraying the strength of a mere child. His gaze shone like the sunset hitting the water behind him. Bright and untamed. The sight had you yanking your arm until there were bruises. "Let go!"

That seemed to get through to him. He released you in favor of digging his palms into his eyes, crouching down on shaky feet.

"It hurts." He bit out from behind his arms. His mouth was contorted into a painful grimace. All you knew at the time was the desire to help someone in pain. Now you know you'd been the one to awaken the six eyes with your lame attempt to sneak up behind him, and now his life would never be the same. His eyes would have eventually stirred without you, but even now, any time you saw him get lost in the euphoria of submitting to the monster behind his eyes, guilt bit at your heart.

NINE

You were the one who took a baseball bat to the back of a bounty hunter's head who had nine-year-old Satoru's throat in his hands and was shoving his pristine hair into the mud, your screams akin to a snarred animal. The wet crunch of bone was nearly as nasty as the blood the stranger puked onto Satoru's horrified face before he collapsed, wheezing and dying. Satoru's choked screams and the fear in his wide eyes kept you both up for days. The unimaginable price (at least, to nine-year-olds) on his head and all the other shit that came with being a Gojo meant games of tag were replaced with sparring and meetings and getting his eyes to activate at will.

Migraines interrupted the various funerals he had to attend until there were no more Gojos to mourn.

It was that night, after the last funeral, when you offered to stay up and watch movies or spar and got turned down for everything, that infinity kicked in for the first time. All you were trying to do was hug him from behind -- give him the chance to know someone was still there -- but when you looked down between your shirt and his and saw a gap that wouldn't close in spite of your efforts.

"Sa-"

"Just leave!" And, as if the air could follow the command, a sudden force pushed you across the room and into the wall with enough strength to split the wood at your back and make plaster fall from the ceiling. Satoru's eyes widened when he saw what he'd done and rushed to pull you from the crater. A couple of stitches in the back of your head was the price to pay for awakening the rest of his technique.

ELEVEN

You were the one who disagreed when someone said Satoru's Six Eyes were getting 'better'. The migraines became so bad at one point you were left yanking some random sunglasses from a rack when his mind betrayed him in the middle of a store. Flickering lights made the other patrons glance around warily. All you focused on was the boy trying to crush his head between his hands. The groan of pain was torturous.

Your fingers skimming his temples helped distract him some, but the hug of glasses on the bridge of his nose was downright confusing. Warily he risked a peek with one eye, and now your look of concern was a little darker, a little less painful. "Is it helping?" You whispered.

Satoru chanced a look around. The gouge of pain in his head was still there -- did it ever leave? -- but the cursed energy around the room didn't assault him nearly as much as before. "How did you come up with that?"

"It's bright in here; I read that makes things worse."

He caught sight of himself in a mirror. With a squint, he scrutinzed his reflection, turning this way and that. Count on the sight of his own face to distract him from his pain. "What kind of glasses did you pick? Am I some rock band member?"

Now your head was beginning to hurt. "They were the first I grabbed, shut up."

THIRTEEN

You were the one sitting under the massive cherry tree in the Gojo estate courtyard (one of them, anyway), enjoying the gentle breeze ruffling the leaves above you, trying to ignore the turmoil happening just a few feet away. Days had gone by this way, with a scroll delicately held between your fingers, your neck sore from looking down for so long, and the various groans and grumbles of the teenager opposite you. He swiped away some sweat on his cheek.

"Does it say anything else?"

You squinted. "I think it says to focus your cursed energy into a single point, like the tip of your finger."

"What do you mean, 'you think'?"

"It's 500 years old! The inks all faded."

Satoru glared at the tip of his pointer and middle fingers. His eyes blazed. The air warbled, rippled, and sparked, but returned to normal.

He threw his hands into his hair, swore vehemently, and trudged over to the bag by your knee, "this is stupid! We're getting food," he ground out, ripping the cap off his water bottle and jamming his glasses back on his face.

"But the principal-"

"I don't care. You coming or not?"

The shoppe was busy, but Satoru's beguiling words got you a table by the window, only big enough for two though, and you hid the giggle behind your drink as he methodically folded his spindly legs under the table.

It all seemed like an okay idea at the time; the weather was nice, the crowds weren't bad, and Satoru's jaw finally relaxed after a batch of desserts was laid out in front of you both. His insistence.

"Satoru, I'm serious. You need to try harder to activate Blue-"

"Why? So the adults can start sending me after curses? No way."

"You need to be able to protect people. . ."

He was in the midst of instigating a powdered sugar fight when the warm sunlight was abruptly blocked. Three burly high schoolers scorned you both, drinks in hand and eyes pinched when they saw you sitting comfortably.

"This is our table." One bit.

"Move," added another.

Satoru, to his credit - or his ego - leisurely peaked at them over the rim of his glasses. His fork clattered against his plate. Then, he began looking around, first on the table, then under it, then at the back of his chair. When he met their eyes again, his were alight, hidden behind dark lenses but obvious from your angle. The hair on your arms rose.

"Funny," he lied, "I don't see your names anywhere."

The third guy was too oblivious to feel the sinister twist in the air. Instead he snickered and pointed. "This one's wearing sunglasses inside. Albino freak."

You put a hand up to Satoru, attempting to keep his leash tight. This wouldn't end well if he got serious in front of civilians. "We're just trying to enjoy our day, please just leave us alone-"

"Ain't talking to you, bitch!"

You yelped at the searing scorch of coffee dumped on your chest, writhing in a vain attempt to keep your hot clothing off your skin. Satoru clocked the assault, and his eyes burned hot with rage. He stood, years younger than the goons but already taller, and finally they saw the azure inferno kindling when he removed his glasses. They cowered while the air crackled.

You felt a change in the atmosphere. Your heart convulsed. Something was wrong.

"Sator-"

"Blue."

Every window exploded. The shoppe door erupted off its hinges and flew across the street. The walls split in every directions, chunks of ceiling fell to the floor, and picture frames shattered. Patrons and the tables they occupied were tossed violently. You shrunk when glass and wood pelted your skin. A cacophony of sound almost immediately gave way to complete silence. The only thing you heard was the kid Satoru had launched across the room into the opposite wall, gargling on blood. Alive, but damaged beyond recognition.

Satoru pulled you by the hand out of the rubble and onto the street. Onlookers gasped while Satoru merely grinned at them.

"They deserved it."

"No, they didn't!"

"They were weak."

"It doesn't matter!" You continued to chase the gangly silhouette. Three of your strides for every one of his. "You're strong, crazy strong, but I don't treat you any different. Am I beneath you, too?"

"I don't know, are you?"

His sentence ended with your scream. Your hand pulled from his, and when he turned, you were sitting on the rough cobblestone, cringing at the glass shards and wood splinters poking grotesquely from your palms and arms. Blood seeped from the growing wounds. A spike of wood stood up inches from its place in your thigh. Taunting him. Harming him, too, if only mentally.

"Crap," he swore, falling in front of you, "how'd you not notice this sooner?"

"A-Adrenaline, I guess." You sniffled. "You didn-n't give me much time to realize. . ." Words grew more difficult as the pain rose to a boil. His hurried inspection - turning your arms this way and that - made you whimper and flinch. Still, you managed to meet his eyes in a heavy stare; he needed to hear this. "Any of us can be more than what we were born to be. . . made to be."

He stared back, mute, for many seconds. His eyes changed shades of blue like waves in the deep ocean. Your cursed energy had always been eye-catching, but now, in the continuous onslaught of cursed energy from a city full of people (a mix of anxious, happy, depressed, infatuated, sick), it glowed soft, warm, and affectionate. It beckoned to him, begging for attention, a drug for his eyes. Looking at you, even with his level of perception, was always easy.

The rest of world had to intrude, though. A space behind his eyes grew teeth and bit at the nerve endings there. He flinched, groaned, and pinched his temples in a useless attempt to ease the pain. It did nothing. Only the graze of your knuckles on his forehead quieted the storm in his head. He watched as you diligently smoothed the lines in his brow. Satoru couldn't really see the color of your eyes anymore - one of the many 'blessings' of his technique - but nevertheless he stared at them for an unknown time, a man lost at sea using the sun for direction.

Something in his heart gave a fierce kick.

"It'll take a while for new glasses to come in." You mentioned.

He grabbed your hands and held them in his own. Azure sparks crackled between his fingers and yours. "That's what you're worried about?" He asked.

"Don't be dramatic-hey!" You exclaimed when he suddenly fell forward, head slumped on your shoulder. He was dangerously close to falling over had your hands not rushed to keep him upright.

"Sorry, just. . ." he whispered into your collar, "little tired."

"Yeah, well," you struggled to hold your phone on his back without bothering your cuts. His bulk made seeing the screen almost impossible. "Just close your eyes. I'll get us a ride."

You were the first to see Blue. In hindsight, you wished you hadn't.

SEVENTEEN

You were the one left to pick up the pieces when Geto left; it was like Gojo's own body was defending itself. Even you didn't know the extent until you ran into the gym some weeks later to escape a sudden downpour and saw Satoru, back to you, forehead pressed to the wall and shoulders hunched in discomfort. Something was horribly wrong. That much became apparent when you walked right up behind him and he seemed completely unaware. It would be one of the only times he'd let anyone sneak up on him, but it hurt so damn much-

"Satoru?" You called quietly. He flinched and quivered, but didn't turn.

"I can't get it to turn off, I can't, I. . ." he choked out between gasps. Overhead lights flickered and arcs of blue, red, and purple light traveled around him. The air buzzed, a warning of impending danger. Like the pause right before a lightning strike.

You pushed through the chill that had broken out over your skin. "It's alright, I'm here-"

"You need to go," he rushed, "it's not-"

"I'm not leaving you," you tried to touch him only to be stopped by an invisible force, "Satoru, turn off Infinity-"

"I can't!" Lightbulbs in the ceiling burst. You could feel your hair lift with static electricity.

A foreboding weight fell over your body. Infinity pressed on you form all directions, a dominating force, threatening to throw you back at best and crush your bones at worst. "Okay! Okay, just. . . just breathe. I'm not going anywhere."

All you could see was his back. Tall, lean, towering up between you. "I should have seen it," Satoru rambled, "stopped him, I have to save the world - I can't save my friend, I'm cursed-"

"Breathe, Satoru." You said with volume. Finally, his shoulders heaved and you heard a muffled, ragged exhale. The invisible barrier between your hand and the back of his shirt shrunk. "I know you're not used to hearing it, but there's nothing you could have done, and. . . I'd never let you be cursed." Your added with a thunderstorm in your chest. Too much. You'd said too much.

The gap between your hand and his back closed entirely. Sparks of static tingled where your fingertips grazed the fabric of his shirt. He was damp with sweat.

Satoru's chilling eyes - still activated - peaked at you over his shoulder. He knew what you meant.

You pulled your hand to your chest. Eye contact was impossible. "Look, it's going slower than I thought, but I'm getting stronger. Soon I'll be able to help you more, so you won't have to do so much by yourself."

He faced you. "Don't make me laugh." He replied bitterly. Unfortunately for him, you saw right through the facade. Your other hand reached to graze over the stress line in his forehead, and his eyes fell closed involuntarily.

"When was the last time you slept?" You asked.

"Last night." He said, eyes still closed.

"More than a couple hours."

"Don't ask questions you don't want the answer to."

His eyes opened again. This time they were dim, calm.

"Where are your glasses?"

"Broke." Satoru had you follow his gaze to where they lay a few feet away, frame twisted beyond repair and lenses nothing but a mess of shards. You delved into your backpack and revealed a crisp roll of white wrap. He shied away when you attempted to cover his eyes with it. "What are you doing?"

"You're eyes are getting stronger. I thought something like this would happen so," you held up the roll like it was its own answer, "sealing bandages to keep your eyes from bothering you as much - see?" You proved your point when his eyes began to flicker against his will. Satoru pinched them shut, hissing. He let you bring his face down to your level, mumbling childishly while you fiddled to get the bandages under his unruly hair.

"Least I don't get tired anymore."

Yes. How could you forget Toji's attempted murder and Satoru's new 'awakening'. Just thinking of the memory burned a pit into your stomach, but you words remained casual. "Only you would learn reversed technique on the brink of death."

Satoru frowned. Your cursed energy became tainted with worry. He nestled into your shoulder, enjoying the subtle skitter of your heart in response. "Like to keep you guessing."

"It's been a while. Do you still like temple massages?" You asked, your thumb rubbing the scar on his forehead.

He sighed, putting a little more weight on you. "I won't stop you."

TWENTY

Apparently, you didn't learn your lesson the first time Satoru's technique almost killed you. Where Blue took out a building, Purple took out a whole forest. You were in the hospital for days and Satoru barely left your room to shower. His six eyes never quit assessing you, and sensed you were waking a full hour before your eyes opened. Even with all that time to prepare, he still lost his breath when your hazy gaze finally - finally - set itself on his. It felt like he was able to use both lungs again.

"S'toru?" You garbled. How was it a chore to breathe?

His hands couldn't stay away from you. Cheeks, hair, eyelids, jawline, lips, every touch feathery, nearly soothing you back to sleep. Satoru's smile was blurry, but his voice was clear. "Took you long enough."

You would have brought him closer if your arms would cooperate. "Your eyes."

"Gotta see when you're waking up. You got pretty messed up."

"No," you denied, "they're bloodshot. . . got bags." As ethereal as they were, it wasn't the activation of the six eyes itself you were concerned with. His skin was ashen. He looked. . . normal. Human.

"Barely awake two minutes and already dishing it out." He smirked. It didn't reach the rest of his sunken face. Was it possible he lost weight?

"How long. . .?"

"Have you been here? Eight days." Satoru plucked a loose strand of hair and laid it behind your ear. "You lost a lot of blood, but Shoko said nothing should be permanent. That curse user won't touch you ever again. I made sure of it."

Oh. Like he didn't have enough to do already. Satoru never had help, even in the midst of his own death after fighting Toji. Sudden thoughts of mortality, grieving, love, and the torture you experienced looking at the reserved, melancholy look in Satoru's eyes were forcing tears onto your lashes before you realized what was happening. A soggy exhale was all you could do to keep calm. Your hands struggled to lift off the bed. "C-Can I ho-old you?"

"Of course," he said, pulling your arms up until they locked behind his neck. Poor thing, your cursed energy was a mess. "You're on a lot of medication right now, just breathe." He added before he pressed a long kiss to your forehead. Then your eyelids. Then your nose.

"Don't stop." You pleaded. It wasn't enough.

His lips finally fell to yours. Again and again he delivered you from life and to a euphoric heaven.

"Never."

A steady grip on your chin forced your head up and Satoru began to lovingly reacquaint himself with your neck. There was little else you could do than clutch his shirt in your fingers until your knuckles creaked and your breath ran away. Slow kisses, gentle lavs of his tongue, and the occasional rub of his canines over your artery were an intoxicating insanity. One of your hands had to cover your mouth to prevent the whole floor from hearing you, but judging by the wet, heaving breaths Satoru was gasping into your throat, you weren't the only one losing composure.

His own hand moved to the back of your head while the other delved under your body and crushed your chest to his. The bed barely contained his height, with one foot bracing him on the floor and the other hanging off the end of the mattress. Even then his shoulders were taller than yours and broad enough to cover both sides of the bed.

Between his weight and the mattress, you thought you'd get engulfed by heat and a dazed kind of insanity quickly drowning your brain.

The pressure on your throat mounted. Satoru rushed his words like he couldn't bear to be away from your neck longer than a moment at a time. "Thought I'd never kiss this neck again, you have no idea how much I missed this."

Teeth pinched at your skin.

"S-Satoru-"

He prayed into your neck, "so damn sorry. . ."

Crackles of electricity arced between him, you, and the bed, the very air growing excited, too. First blue, then red, and finally purple. The flourescent light bars swayed and jostled in an invisible torrent and the various machines flickered until they died or were simply forced away from the bed, skidding on their wheels.

His bites became more aggressive. Before, you worried about bruising, and now you felt like blood would stream down your skin and stain sheets. The softness of his hair tickling your chin was a stark contrast to the sharp points digging into your neck.

"Satoru. . . you. . . calm down," you barely managed with the static in your head. At this point, you were beginning not to care what he did as long as it meant he didn't let go. Public safety be damned.

A knee knocked its way between your legs. You yelped, and the sound of pain helped finally knock some sense into him. The EKG screen returned to normal, albeit with a few busted pixels, and read a heartrate close to exploding.

Satoru didn't look much better, though. When he could finally separate from you, finally lay you back on the bed so he could sit up himself, his eyes were pulsating and he sluggishly wiped a smear of spit from his mouth with the back of his sleeve. When his eyes saw the mark he'd left behind, they drooped, satisfied and quelled, if temporarily.

He was still out of breath when he found some words to string together, "I got a little. . . carried away."

TWENTY-TWO

You were dying. The curses foot-long claws in your stomach told you as much. Was the cold in your body from the loss of blood or from the nighttime rain soaking you to the bone? Now you couldn't be sure.

The darkness made the blue so much brighter.

Satoru appeared out of nowhere, cerulean electricity dancing on his clothes. Later, he'd tell you he somehow felt a change in the air even from a hundred miles away, and teleported without knowing he could.

His eyes blazed unnaturally bright - even for him - when he saw the curse's claws slowly pulling out of your body. The air turned purple, lightning in the clouds overhead brightened the forest for a moment, wind tossing your hair with a wild gust.

The next second, Satoru was beside you, and the curse's neck was in his hand. His grin was strange, but his laugh scared you the most. Usually he could never stop talking, but right now you'd prefer anything over the wheezy, broken cackle he couldn't help but release.

He squeezed his fingers just to enjoy the strangled garbles from the monster. "You? You thought you could hurt her?" Satoru rambled amidst his chuckles. Then he and the curse disappeared.

Next, the curse still in hand, he reappeared a ways away, several feet in the air, and let the curse fall to the earth. Satoru teleported under it, letting its back fall into his fist where he catapulted it back up. Again he moved in an instant, above it now, and kicked it back to the ground hard enough to open up a crater and blow you back to the treeline with the shockwave. The indomitable force of cursed energy crushing you to the ground made it impossible to get us or run away.

Satoru stepped in the crater with the grace of a dancer. "You know what? Do it."

The monster screamed when he held it up by its jaw and squeezed until the bone crumpled and gushed blood all over him. He dropped it freely, allowing it the chance to run. The curse scrambled for footing, made it out of the crater, and galloped towards you before Satoru teleported next to it and stopped it with one long leg pinning it down.

He kicked the thing several yards until it stilled a few feet away from you, gasping and writhing.

Satoru stalked towards you both. Each long stride was slow, meandering, barely disturbing the wet grass beneath his shoes. His head was down, and his hair covered his eyes. All you heard was a dark tone come from the shadow. "Try to kill her again. Try to defeat me by going after my one weakness. I'll even give you a hand, here."

He grabbed it by the scruff and threw it over your shoes. "Everything else has been taken from me, why stop? Come on. Try harder. What, spine broken? That's a pathetic excuse. Get up."

The stranger in front of you kicked the creature. It let out a feeble whine. "Get up." He said again with another kick. And another. And another. "Get up. Getup getup getup getup getupgetupgetupgetupgetup!!"

Satoru bludgeoned the creature with his heel again and again and again. Sickening crunches and squelches had you covering your mouth to try and keep from vomiting. Each stomp of his foot distorted the creature until it was little more than a carcass.

"Satoru, stop!"

Thunder growled in the sky. An ominous pause filled the air.

His eyes peeked sideways at you, then, he cocked his head in your direction. The tiny, calculated movement had your heart hitting the ground. He had assessed you and deemed you unworthy as a threat in the same second.

"You think you can stop me?" A fierce wind lashed at you. "Tell me - tell me how you'd stop me!"

Even the shouts of Nanami and Shoko and Utahime in the distance couldn't reach him.

He was losing himself. Perhaps forever.

Rain turned sideways in the accelerating torrent. Satoru tilted his head skyward, arms out and palms up, embracing the storm. "I can see everything, hear everything, be anywhere at anytime. With my thoughts, I make the universe."

Then, his gaze fell on you.

"Watch." He snickered.

With a roar from the ground, chasms carved open the earth all around you. A patch of dirt fell from under his feet but Satoru hovered above it, completely dry despite the downpour soaking you to the bone. He giggled, carefree, maniacal, and foreign. This wasn't the person who had stolen your first kiss.

A shadow erupted from him, blocking out all surroundings - the wind and rain and cold - until it was just you and him, alone in an imaginary world. Nebulae and galaxies filled the darkness until it was bright with starlight. Sound disappeared until you could hear your own blood in your veins.

Domain expansion.

Satoru was giggling while tears fell off his cheeks. For all his eyes could see, they seemed to be looking at nothing. Your heart felt the impending demise. This was it. No way you'd survive the domain of Satoru Gojo. You tried to remember the scared little boy by the pond 18 years ago. He was much happier then.

You almost enjoyed the tears falling down your own cheeks. Perhaps it was fate that you'd end up dying at Satoru's hand after all the close calls. You only hoped he wouldn't blame himself for this later, or that someone would call for his extermination.

With one remaining moment, you did the only thing you could think of.

"I love you." You said, and you closed your eyes.

The chaotic buzz in your body stopped. The fear quieted. You felt a gentle breeze, and the soft rustle of tree leaves came back.

A raindrop fell on your cheek.

You opened your eyes, seeing the normal world around you in a wave of relief, but feeling fear all over again when you saw Satoru, his hands holding his head, shouting at the power warring within his mind.

"Make it stop!" He yelled.

"It's okay, Satoru," you gasped, holding your stomach and swallowing the grunt of pain, "just breathe, it'll pass."

Your body gave out. Without a choice you fell back into the grass. The dark, rolling clouds flickered with occasional lightning. You don't know how long you watched, but it was beautiful.

Satoru crouched over you, eyes downcast but still bright with his technique. A reptilian fear response kicked in a rush of adrenaline allowed you to scramble back. His hand hovered, outstretched, reaching for you. Satoru's eyes showed shock and hurt.

"You're afraid of me." He called across the vast space between you.

"I'm - I'm sorry." You said. You tried to crawl back to him but the injuries finally became too much and you collapsed just as he ran to close the gap, pulling you into his lap and trying to staunch the hole in your belly. You moaned at the pressure.

"F-Fuck, I can't remember, what'd I do-"

Your voice was quiet. He hardly heard you over the pounding storm. "You saved me. I'm fi-ine."

"No you're not. Your cursed energy's all over the place, damn it." Satoru smushed his forehead to yours, taking a massive inhale. "Don't you leave me, too."

"Hey," you called, raising a thumb to massage the worry line between his brows, "remember when I said I'd try to - heh - get better? So you wouldn't. . . have to worry."

"Yeah?"

"Well. . ." you added, putting your hand over your stomach. Slowly, a faint white orb covered your wound, and Satoru watched your cursed energy glow and the injury begin to gradually sew itself shut. "You're not the only strong one."

He watched in awe, a little smile on his lips. This time a familiar, genuine one. He held you softly in his gaze in a way that warmed you without touch. You nestled against his shoulder and prepared for the long recovery and the impending clinginess of the man holding you. Satoru's eyes always gave him away.

[lovefender76]

bubbles

a stressful day leads to steve planning to melt the blues away.

you called steve on your break and told him, whilst holding back tears, about how awful the day had been; your boss who had only ever been so nice had shouted at you; the old lady you assumed needed help gave you the rudest look; you forgot your lunch you had packed the night before and to top it off a migraine had settled itself behind your eyes. steve had told you to come home early but unfortunately sarah had just called in sick meaning you had a few more hours to go. as much it annoyed steve that he couldn’t comfort you straight away it meant he had time to get a plan in action.

steve raced to get ready and out the apartment, he threw himself into his car and spend off to the store. he picked up only the best for his girl, making sure to scan the wine section but ultimately went for what he knew would taste somewhat decent.

after speeding around the shops and a very distracting call from robin about what she should do on her first date with vicky, steve was finally able to put his twist on your worst day. he went to your shared wardrobe first and picked out some clean matching pyjamas for you both not bothered by the fact that they were indeed christmas pyjamas and lay them out on the bed. moving swiftly around the apartment, he began his prep on the food for you both. something easy and pleasing, pasta bolognaise. steve began chopping up all the vegetables he was going to use before combining them all in the pot on the stove, he checked the time and realising you would be coming through the door soon he made his way to the bathroom to begin preparing your bath.

steve knew how relaxing baths could be for you, so took his time reading the instructions on the back of the bottle of bubble bath- pouring in just enough to create a light gathering around the bathtub. he lit a few candles here and there to create a soft atmosphere and placed a towel on the towel rack to warm through. he went back to the kitchen were he poured you both a small glass of wine and turned the pot to simmer so the only thing to do was cook the pasta when you were ready.

the door closed, a bag hit the floor and you eventually made your way to steve who was sitting on the sofa eagerly awaiting your arrival. you were dragged next to him and pulled into a stifling hug which made it difficult to breathe for a moment. “everything is taken care of, all i want you to do is relax, okay?” steve assured you, you drew back and confused look etched on your face. steve shot up “come on, follow me”. he grabbed your hands and dragged you towards the bathroom, you were met with a warm orange light and a perfectly ran bath. you practically fell into steve, thankfulness radiating throughout your entire body. “you have no clue how happy this makes me, thank you so much stevie” you kissed his lips and steve left you to get comfortable.

knocking on the door to check it was okay to come in steve brought you a glass of wine and sat on the floor beside the bathtub. you both talked and talked, thoughts of the awful day you had melting away as each minute passed. “you’ll be getting cold if you don’t get out soon” steve prompted you and he was right you could feel the temperature of the bath had dropped and the bubbles had evaporated. “can you pass the towel please” you asked after a brief moment, steve smirked but stood up after a second to get the towel for you. he helped you out the bath, wrapping you tight in the warm towel and led you to the bedroom where the matching pyjamas lay waiting.

steve disappeared once he got into his pyjamas, leaving you to do your skincare as he began to cook the pasta. everything was coming together nicely.

you folded the towel away and went looking for steve only to find him standing over the stove, you moved quietly got on your tiptoes and hugged his waist with your head resting on his shoulder. “thank you for all of this” you whisper bringing a kiss to his temple, steve leaned into you and reiterated how you deserve much more than this.

dinner was served, wine was drank and now you were sitting on the sofa with steve’s head in your lap scratching softly at his scalp. he groaned at the sensation and turned onto his back looking up at you, “how would you rate your day now, angel?” he enquired, taking a moment to think and exaggerating the thought process you responded “hmm i don’t know about a nine and a half”. steve guffawed “so what could i do to push it to say a ten?”. “oh, that’s easy” you responded tapping your lips with your index finger. steve rolled his eyes but sat up, holding your face with both hands but taking a moment to admire the tiredness that had established as the evening went on. he kissed you with tender care, “see an easy ten now.” you muttered as steve pulled away.

[etherealising]

chapter eight | to see a friend, to see a ghost

masterlist | ↢ previous chapter | next chapter ↣

pairing: carmen berzatto x fem!reader

summary: a secret you’ve been keeping from carmen finally comes to light.

warning(s): grief | death | loss | substance abuse recovery | substance abuse | addiction | miscarriage described as a health scare | miscarriage described as being sick | suicidal thoughts | suicidal ideation | hurt | comfort | crying | make-up | rekindling an old friendship | mutual pining | denial of desires | maturity | mature decisions | carmy finally putting baby’s wellbeing before his own | unresolved romantic tension | re-learning your person | angst | suffering | self-deprecating talk | please let me know if i missed anything!

wc: 8.9k

song inspo: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5 (highly recommend to add to the heartbreak!)

If it was any later and the sky was any darker, you might have been startled by the figure waiting on your porch. But as you approached, arms occupied with bags full of decorations, you recognized that patch color jacket, and the baseball cap not doing nearly enough to disguise his features.

Stopping before your steps you just looked at the person for a minute, the man was obviously zoned out if he hadn’t already been alerted to your presence from the sound of your car arriving and now the slap of your boots against the pavement.

When you left that voicemail earlier, you hadn’t expected Carmy to take immediate action, it wasn’t like him. You also didn’t expect him to show up unannounced but maybe you should’ve waited before sending your address in that group text.

You made your way up the steps, the jingling keys in your hand finally drew the man’s attention, and the speed at which he flew off the chair situated on your porch was almost comical. Your eyes darted to his, taking in what you could see of his figure that wasn’t hidden behind his jacket or hat. He held two paper bags in one hand and the package you had been expecting in the other, sure the delivery driver just left it with him.

The silence stretched between the two of you. You could see Carmen begin to fidget in your peripheral vision; good he deserved to be uncomfortable for a minute or two.

Finally unlocking the door you pushed through, pausing to take your shoes off. The man behind you hesitated, not sure if he should move forward to follow behind you or not. He took a minute before stepping forward, your eyes meeting his as you stood between his only entrance.

“I don’t remember inviting you in,” it was harsh, but it was also the truth.

He stopped for a moment, cheeks flushing pink as he cleared his throat, “Can I uh, is it okay if I come in?”

It would have been easy to deny him access, leave him out here on your porch, or even allow him to squirm more. But you could hear Pete’s words playing in your mind as you thought of all the petty things you wanted to do at that moment.

You let out an exasperated sigh the constant back and forth between the two of you was finally catching up. You nodded before heading to your living room to drop the bags off on the couch, the open door an invitation for the man on your porch. The bags were safely deposited on your couch as you moved to head into your kitchen, stopping short as you spotted Carmy still standing in your foyer.

A chuckle escaped your lips at the awkward man. You made your way to him, stopping in front of him and taking the package from his hand and the two grocery bags. “You can leave your shoes and jacket out here.” You left him standing alone in the foyer, confident he would find his way to you eventually.

Carmen watched as you disappeared further into your house, the man quickly shedding his shoes and accessories, stopping at the mirror by the coat rack to tame his messy hat hair. He felt like a teenager all over again, fussing over how he would present himself to you. Carmy moved in the direction you had gone in, steps slowing as he tried to take in everything he could about your abode, from the decorations to the colors swatched on your walls. It all reminded him of things he missed out on with you, would you have gushed to him about the prospect of owning a home? Would you have asked his opinion on design choices?

The two of you had once gone to each other for everything, and because he was afraid of being completely vulnerable to his feelings for you, he felt like a stranger on the outside looking in.

He found you in the kitchen, eyes locked on the bottle of wine in your hands he brought with him, “You uh…talked about how much you loved it back in New York so I-I thought it might be nice to have it again.”

Your index finger traced the label of the bottle in your hand, memories of that weekend flooding through you, but that’s just what they were; memories. It was the present day now and no matter the itch you felt to let the red wine warm your mouth, drink enough of it to dull your senses, you wouldn’t allow yourself to.

“What are we doing Carmen?” The bottle of red was gently placed on your island as you looked at the man standing in the space just between your kitchen and living room.

Seeing him in a space that had been wholly your own felt a little weird, you didn’t want to think about the times you imagined what it would’ve been like to share such a space with him as you watched him stand in your house like he was meant to be there; like he belonged.

“I got your voicemail,” you leaned your elbows on the counter propping your head up as you listened. “This is me accepting your olive branch, I just…wanna make things right between us..” The explanation pulled a sigh from your lips, fingers tracing patterns into the marble island beneath you. You left the voicemail with the assumption that it would take Carmen a bit to get back to you, he had never been adamant about fixing your relationship before.

“You also have something I need,” Carmen watched as you raised your eyebrows, eyes leaving the spot you were tracing.

“And what would that be?” The scar between your eyebrows felt tight as your face pulled into a frown, your brain wandering to figure out what you could possibly have that Carmen would need.

Carmen sent a small smile your way, “Let’s cook and we’ll talk about it after.” You watched as the man joined you on the opposite side of your island reaching to remove the rest of the food from their bags.

The genuine laugh that bubbled out of your chest filled Carmy with warmth, “Do you always walk into people's houses and try and negotiate?”

Carmy did his best to control the warm fluttery feeling in his chest, the weeks without you were hard and the fact that your laugh could ease his full body ache was enough for him to realize just how much he wanted you as a constant in his life. “I didn’t think I’d make it this far.”

A silence lapsed between the two of you as you helped unpack the rest of the food. This whole situation felt like a bad idea, you definitely weren’t over Carmen’s stunt or the previous incidents where he let you down. But you had been skating through this year on borrowed time, and the time apart helped to calm your anger, you felt like you were in a much more level headed place to finally figure out what the hell this thing was between the two of you. And Pete’s words at lunch helped to give you a new perspective on the whole situation.

“What the hell are we even making?” Baking was your preferred form of cooking, so as you looked at all the ingredients laid out it was a bit confusing to piece the meal together.

The sound of your voice warmed Carmen’s senses, the silky tone danced through his ears buzzing against his brain. “Chicken Marsala.”

You nodded, declining a glass of wine with dinner was one thing, but now looking at the new bottle of Marsala that would be in your meal, you’d have to decline the whole dinner.

“That sounds so fucking delicious but I…I actually can’t eat it.”

Carmen stopped his ministrations with the ingredients, “No you’re good I uh I didn’t get anything you’re allergic to.” His eyes darted across the ingredients double checking that he hadn’t bought any compromising ingredients.

“Thank you, Carm, your consideration is thoughtful.” The extra measure made your heart rate speed up.

It was crazy really how the same man standing in your kitchen swearing up and down he didn’t buy any foods you were allergic to, could also be the same man who came across as uncaring.

“I appreciate the effort I do but…” Your heart felt like it was going to pound out of your chest. How could you admit to your best friend, the person who once knew you most, that almost a year ago you were staring at blank hospital walls as some doctor explained to both you and Natalie just how close to death you were? “Carmy I-”

The hand resting on your elbow helped to calm your breathing, it wasn’t like you weren’t ready to admit your overdose to Carmy, you were just worried about the aftermath. “Baby hey, you with me?” You felt the hand skate down your arm, Carmy’s thumb soothingly caressing your pulse point.

You turned to face Carmen searching his eyes, doing your best to memorize the way he looked at you, unsure if you’d ever be graced with this intimate gaze again. “Carmen I…I’ve been sober for 7 months.”

The silence in your kitchen was loud, You needed Carmy to say something to you, yell at you, call you a hypocrite for blowing up on him all those weeks ago when you had been the one lying to him this whole time. It would be easier if the blank wide-eyed look on his face morphed into one of disgust, hatred, hell any emotion would’ve been welcome. “You fuckin’ with me right?” The apprehension in his voice was the result of not knowing if he could bear to hear the idea that something so heinous could plague you.

The wobble of your bottom lip was enough, Carmen’s eyes skated across your face landing on the three prominent features that had been added to your appearance; the tiny scar on your upper lip, the one between your brows, and the jagged raised one stretching the length of your jaw.

The breath in your throat hitched as his finger slowly traced the long scar, the touch sent shivers through you. Your eyes watched him as he watched you, finger deliberately taking in the pattern on your jaw, his hand unconsciously moved to cup your face in the way he liked, forefinger pressed into your hidden tattoo as his thumb began caressing the corner of your lips.

“What the fuck happened to you, Baby?”

The shower you just finished was much needed, Carmy volunteering to pick up different ingredients while you relaxed before the two of you began this search for the truth. He didn’t say it but you knew he needed some time to internalize the small piece of truth you told him, to rationalize just how much you had gone through in your time apart.

You could hear Carmen shuffling around in your kitchen as you stepped out of the bathroom, steam following you out. Grabbing your moisturizer you moved to sit on the edge of your bed, mind racing to figure out what you were even doing putting yourself in this situation.

These past three weeks without Carmen felt needed, you were thankful for the time apart to focus on yourself and your wellbeing. But it always felt like there was a piece of you missing, it felt like that every time the two of you parted ways. The difference was instead of spending the time apart worrying over Carmy every minute you had finally put yourself first, and began living for yourself just like Tina had advised all those years ago.

And while a part of you wanted to continue this childish charade of ignoring Carmy, only showing up at the restaurant when Richie assured you he wouldn’t be there; you couldn’t. It took too much energy to live your life around Carmen’s especially since the two of you were so much more involved with each other than you had been in a while. Even without Pete’s words of advice, you could see the toll it was taking on the people around you. Natalie was too scared to even mention her brother for fear you’d have a meltdown. Richie’s anger for your situation souring his relationship with Carmen. And Carmen himself, he who had become a haggard sunken-in version of himself, the time apart affected him the worst his patience nowhere to be seen from the few times Richie had offhandedly mentioned him in your presence.

The two of you had been in each other's lives for longer than you could remember and you didn’t want to lose that friendship over your pride. During your time away from Carmen, you had come to the decision that you would be fine if all that was fated to be between you two was a friendship.

More recently you had decided that maybe it was for the best, maybe the two of you were never meant for anything more, anything good. Maybe it was naive to think you deserved anything good with all the hurt your selfish choices caused. Maybe it was best not to take any time and attention away from your recovery. This friendship was just a whole bunch of fucking ‘maybes’ recently.

But one could say that ‘friendship’ went out the window when the two of you crossed that blurred line a year ago.

You paused as your hand reached for the old crew neck you’d usually sleep in, as much as you loved the garment you couldn’t allow yourself to give Carmen any false hope about what would come from this. Walking into your closet you quickly grabbed your oversized ‘The Beef’ crew neck, slipping it over your head before stepping into your sleep shorts and a pair of fuzzy socks.

Exiting your bedroom you stopped by your record player, buying yourself time before you’d have to face Carmen and all the truth that would be exposed in this one conversation alone. You flicked through your vinyl selection before picking your favorite one, needing something comforting for everything that was bound to transpire.

You entered your kitchen seeing Carmy’s back at your stove sent an ache through you. The man cooking in your kitchen was a vision you had more than once, it was almost right, the only thing missing was the small figure you imagined standing in a chair next to Carmy watching from over his shoulder.

“Smells delicious Carm,” you sent a tired smile his way as he looked over his shoulder at you, eyes falling just above his own, no courage left in you to take in the look he was giving you. “What did you end up cooking?” Carmen’s eyes were stuck to you, your words falling on deaf ears, you fidgeted in your spot, the insecurity of being judged by the one person you didn’t think you could handle it from, weighed heavy on you.

Carmen cleared his throat as he watched you sink into yourself. He hadn’t meant to make you feel any type of way with his stare, he was just having a hard time coming to terms with the fact that things had been so bad for you and he had no idea because of his selfish inclinations. “It’s uh Chicken Alfredo, I thought it was safest.”

The air in the kitchen was tense, neither of you knowing how to be around the other at this moment, and you hadn’t even gotten down to the harsh truth of everything yet. “Can you…uh what do you mean you’re sober? I-I know what it means jus-I,” you watched as Carmy closed his eyes, a huff escaping him as he couldn’t articulate what he wanted to say. “Baby, help me understand. Please?”

You could hear the thickness in Carmy’s voice, the two of you watching each other with matching glazed stares. You stood frozen for a minute, your fight or flight instincts kicking in and it took everything in you not to leave the conversation as it was. A sigh escaped you before you nodded your head and hopped to sit on the island, fingers picking at the stray threads on your shorts.

Carmy turned the fire on the stove down before turning to lean against the counter next to your stove, the two of you now facing each other. The distance between you felt like it stretched on for miles, and maybe it did, the two of you didn’t know each other like you once used to. You and Carmy weren’t the same teenagers who shared everything, even the smiles you shared at this point in life held a different meaning.

You never knew where to start this story, was it better to ease the person in, or was it better to just rip the band-aid off all at once? “Now that I’m better I don’t think any reason was good enough for what I did to myself…what I did to the people I love. But uh, Mikey’s death was definitely a catalyst for everything.” You looked up to see Carmy watching you intensely, arms crossed over his chest, you can’t remember a time you’d ever seen him look so serious.

“I was alone, and maybe that’s just an excuse. We…we just buried Mikey, and I was scared to believe he was really gone, it didn’t feel right. I didn’t want it to be true.” You sucked in a deep breath trying to gather your thoughts. “I stayed in Chicago for a long time after that, your mom…gosh she was a mess and I understood why her grief was valid, but I…I just knew Nat couldn’t, didn’t deserve to fix things alone, so I just kept extending my stay.” The small sigh Carmen breathed was lost as you settled more and more into your explanation.

“An-And Richie was doing his fucking best to keep The Beef open but I could tell it was taking a toll on him. Tiff had filed for divorce just months ago and then he was dealing with Mikey’s passing. And I think, I thought if I just helped everyone get better I wouldn’t need to grieve, because I was surrounded by all the people I loved, and their wellbeing mattered most to me.” Carmen’s eyes stayed on your figure allowing your words to settle into him, it hurt knowing how much slack you had to pick up because he couldn’t bring himself to face the music.

Quiet sniffles came from where you sat atop the island. “Carm, you weren’t there…and I promise I’m not blaming you for the decisions I made, none of that is on you. But I just wanted my best friend, and I just needed to know you were okay. And when you weren’t at the funeral my mind went to the worst thoughts first. But then I…I just showed up in New York and you acted like your world wasn’t ending and then I just felt selfish because how was it that your brother just died and I was the one acting like I’d lost the person I looked up to most.” Carmy could feel his chest tighten, your words becoming less and less easy to swallow the more you spoke.

“And for a moment it was like the world stopped screaming like all I needed was your presence to assure me that everything would be okay,” a small sad smile rose to your lips as you thought about your time spent with Carmy in New York. “It-it was blissful and everything I wanted but I knew it was ending, we both knew it was ending you didn’t see a future with me.” You had to stop yourself, a sob sure to be ripped out if you didn’t give yourself a minute, “And I accepted your decision, it was for the best.”

You hugged your knees to your chest, barely beginning to scratch the surface of the worst of what you’d done. The new position provided you the comfort and protection you felt you needed. “I got back to Chicago, and I was only supposed to be here for a few more weeks but then…then I-I got sick and Rich-.” You clasped your hands over your mouth unsure if you could lay all your indiscretions on Carmy at once, unsure if you could mentally handle the toll the two confessions you desperately needed to make would take on you.

Rough palms enclosed your cheeks, moving your head so that you were face to face with Carmy. You could see the unshed tears in his doe-blue eyes, but other than that he didn’t seem to be affected. “Take your time, yeah?” He nodded his head waiting for you to nod along with him so you knew it was okay. The left side of his lips ticked up in a half smile, you let him lean in and place a delicate kiss on your forehead before he moved out of your space. “I’m here okay, I’ll listen for as long as you let me.”

Carmen was making this harder than it needed to be, how could you justify telling him one secret and not the other when he was being so understanding? Carmy made to move back to his original position, your grip on his hand stopping him, a quiet sigh escaping his lips at how fragile you looked. “Lemme turn off the stove okay?” You reluctantly let go of his hand, scared that at the loss of contact, he would take his chance to flee from you.

You watched as he turned the stove off, moving the food he had been cooking to the back burners, you felt bad that he had cooked for the two of you and neither of you would be enjoying it. He moved around the kitchen fear spiking in you as you thought for sure he was going to leave, to wipe his hands of you. He returned to you with a glass of water that he delicately placed in your hands before replacing your legs to their original position and taking his spot between them. Carmy’s finger tapped the glass in your hands “Drink up.” A small nod was your only response as you did as told you before setting the glass down beside you.

Carmy returned his hand to your grasp nodding to let you know he was ready to continue if you were, you took one last deep breath mind made up on how you would handle the rest of this conversation. “He uh Richie, he found me in the walk-in. You know that moment when you know something is wrong but you don’t know how you know. It was kind of like that, like Richie and I both knew I had done something wrong and Carmy,” your voice quivered as your eyes met his, the tears falling at a faster pace as he looked at you so earnestly, hanging onto every word you said. “I’m so sorry.”

Carmen’s brows furrowed, eyes widening as you collapsed against him incoherent apologies addressed to him spewing from your lips. His head came to rest atop of yours as you shoved your face into his chest your words turned to messy babbling as you tried to choke out words through your sobs. For all his social ineptitude Carmy knew there was something you weren’t telling him, something you weren’t being entirely honest about, and he wasn’t sure how it tied into your sobriety. But the way you were apologizing to him made him feel like he was partly responsible.

Your cries were beginning to grow in volume and Carmy was at a loss for what to do. He’d seen you cry before, hell he’d caused most of it but he couldn’t recognize you at this moment. The sobs that escaped you were echoing through the quietude of your house, you had never been an audible crier, usually a few tears escaping your eyes were the most Carmen had gotten. But these cries wracked your entire body, Carmy could feel them rattling his rib cage each sob breaking his exterior down more and more.

He wrapped his arms around you letting your tears soak his shirt, his tears beginning to run down his cheeks. The grip he had on you tightened ever so slightly as you sobbed your throat raw. Carmen needed to know what could’ve caused this reaction, he needed to know what you could ever have to apologize to him for. He felt you moving to get out of his grip, but he held you there as his tears dripped into the crown of your head, quickly wiping his eyes before he pulled back from you allowing you a fresh breath of oxygen.

“Carmy?” Your voice was scratchy as you played with his fingers avoiding any form of eye contact, you raised his knuckles to your lips kissing the ‘ou’ on his middle and ring finger. “Could you hold me for a little bit?” You raised your head to Carmy’s doing your best to send him a reassuring smile, to let him know everything would be okay.

Carmen frowned, he knew that smile anywhere. Even when you were so obviously going through something he couldn’t quite yet understand you would put his feelings before your own. He let out an exasperated sigh your need to put others well being before your own a habit he swore to himself he’d break.

The hand you kissed raised to your face, a light grip on your chin as his thumb caressed the space beneath your lower lip. Carmy leaned forward placing a soft lingering kiss on the scar between your eyebrows, “Let’s take a break yeah?” Carmy watched your body deflate.

He took a step back as you hopped off of the island, the two of you moving to your L-shaped couch. Carmy laid down opening his arms to hold you like the two of you had done hundreds of times while growing up. He knew the gesture would pull a smile out of you, a soft chuckle leaving him as you easily snuggled into him. Your face reverting to its home in his chest, his chin once again resting against the top of your head.

The light atmosphere was short-lived as you relaxed into Carmy, all of your words finally beginning to sink into him. He was happy for the intermission the time would help him to understand what you had told him thus far, to figure out how he could ever make up for the way he constantly held the door open and let you walk out of his life. The way he essentially cut you out of his life because he was afraid to admit to himself that what he felt for you for all these years wasn’t just lust and longing, but love.

Carmy’s fingers had been gently rubbing your scalp for the past forty-five minutes, the position the two of you were in reminiscent of a scene from New York when you visited. Now it was being translated in your own home, Carmy was laying on the couch one arm settled behind his head to prop it up, looking down on you to make sure you were okay. You were settled between his legs, your upper body pressed into his stomach as your head rested on his sternum.

“Baby?” Carmy did his best to whisper, not wanting to disturb you in case you had fallen asleep.

“Hmm?” Your response was so quiet it was easy to miss, Carmy was unsure if you had let out a quiet hum or if you were making noises in your sleep.

He stopped his ministrations on your scalp, his lips ticking up at the soft whine you let out “You asleep?” The question was followed by his fingertips resuming their massage.

“No, your heartbeat is just soothing.” You snuggled your face deeper into Carmen’s stomach, the movement raising goosebumps on his exposed arms. “Carm?” Your quiet voice drew his attention the apprehension clear on his features as he prepared himself for the words soon to leave your mouth. “There’s something that I need to tell you…something that you deserve to know. B-but I don’t think I can do it tonight. And I know that’s not fair to you but I think for my own sake I need to be in a better space mentally.” You shuffled around again turning to lie facedown, one of your cheeks rested against Carmy’s stomach so you could comfortably look up at him.

The confusion in his eyes was evident, whatever it was you couldn’t tell him was making him beyond nervous. It was hard because you had never kept a secret from him unless you absolutely needed to, and when you did it was never for anything more serious than a gift you were getting for him. But he knew he couldn’t force whatever truth you had to tell out of you, a part of him felt a bit relaxed, not knowing how much bad news he could take in the span of one night.

Carmy’s hand reached out palming the side of your face, thumb grazing back and forth in the space just beneath your eye, “You can share it with me when you’re ready m’kay? I’ll wait as long as you need me to.” He pushed a stray piece of hair behind your ear, watching as your eyes closed, a slight grimace on your face as you leaned into his palm more.

“You’re going to hate me, Carmen.” The words left your mouth with so much conviction all Carmy could do was frown, the idea of ever hating you would have never crossed his mind. He wanted to reassure you but lost his chance as you abruptly sat up, the movement caused him to sit up as well, the two of you only inches apart now facing each other. You forced a smile as your side relaxed on the couch, head propped against it as your eyes wandered around Carmy’s features. “Let’s just get through tonight and then we’ll worry about everything else.” You were exhausted. Carmy could tell by the way your blinking slowed, he wanted you to stop, to get some sleep, to put your needs before whatever made you feel like you owed him any explanation.

“Bab-,”

“I was in the hospital for a bit because I…I was sick. But after they discharged me I had been gone from my own life for so long I was so close to not having anything to return to. So I came home and forced the past month into a literal box in my closet, pretended none of it happened.” You were running on fumes at this point, with no regard for whether Carmy was even still listening to you, just this force within you driving you to finish the story.

“There was uh one thing that I couldn’t force myself to get rid of-,”

“The voicemail.” Your eyes shot to Carmy's, his silence easily making you forget he was even still here, that you were recounting these memories for a reason. You nodded eyes unfocused as you looked past him, would there ever be a time you could remember that part of your life without flinching every time you thought about it?

“It started slow, I was just getting back into the swing of things remembering what it was like to be alone after being in Chicago surrounded by people who actually cared about me. I would go out with my co-workers after a shift, drink just enough that I could get myself home, but not enough for anyone to worry about me.” A sardonic laugh left your lips, you were sure nobody would care about you, and you hardly had any strong ties to the West Coast.

“It helped…until it didn’t until I was drinking so much it was almost like my body was immune to the effects. But who needs their liver am I right?” The pinch to your thigh jolted you. Carmy wasn’t welcoming your self-deprecating jokes.

You raised your hands in defense, a humorless chuckle leaving you. “If I’m being honest, I don’t even remember getting that first prescription…not even the ones after it.”

“Wait,” Carmy moved so his feet were firmly planted on the floor, legs spread as he rested his elbows on his thighs. “What the fuck does a prescription have to do with this? Baby?” Carmy wasn’t stupid, he didn’t need you to spell it out for him but the sliver of hope in him was dwindling as the minutes of silence continued to tick by.

You shrugged, moving to sit crisscross applesauce staring blankly at Carmy’s side profile, one of his legs bouncing up and down. “You know they really should make those warnings bigger. About not mixing drugs and alcohol, the font is so tiny how cou-,”

“Stop!” You didn’t even flinch at the loud volume of Carmy’s voice, eyes following his figure as he flew up from the couch. The man was now pacing in front of you, one hand settled on his hip as the other furiously swiped across his forehead. “Why do you…do you…fuck!” The vein on his neck protruded with his frustration. “How do you just sit there and make fucking jokes about this shit Baby! Why the fuck is any of this funny to you?”

The urge to defend yourself was surging through you, in a way you knew Carmy’s reaction was valid. But it wasn’t like there was a handbook on the proper way to deal with your trauma, and you wouldn’t allow him to tell you right from wrong.

“What the fuck do you want from me, Carmen! I did it okay! I drank and I took the fucking drugs and when that shit stopped working on its own I thought hmm why the fuck not mix them because what the fuck could possibly be worse than living. In some fucked up way did I think it would help me understand Mikey? Maybe. It’s not like I fucking planned this shit! I didn’t plan to become addicted okay, that wasn’t supposed to happen I had a system…I had a fucking system.” It was like everything was becoming clearer the moment those last words left your mouth, you may not have planned the beginning, but as you thought back to what could’ve been your last moments you were almost certain some still sane part of you knew what you were doing.

Soft laughter left your lips as the pieces were starting to fit together in your head, the sound only growing in volume as you realized just how fucked up you were. Your eyes were unfocused as your gaze flew to Carmy, the whisper of ‘Baby’ lost in your internal revelation.

“I threw myself through that glass door, not on purpose I can’t even remember why the fuck I wanted to get outside so bad. But I-I remember swallowing those two extra pills and thinking what the fucks gonna happen to me huh, I’ve lasted this long.” Carmen couldn’t recognize you, the tears had started again but he was certain you couldn’t even tell, you looked possessed, your eyes flashing all around the room a wicked smile painted your lips as you spoke to no one in particular.

“Barely made it past the threshold before my body gave out, I wish I could remember, even if only for a second. What it felt like to have your body want something more than your brain did. But you know what the fuck happened Carmen?” Your eyes finally shot to his, you looked like a skittish animal ready to fight Carmy to the death if he encroached on your territory.

A sardonic laugh left your lips, your tongue swiping across them, the saltiness of your tears a shock to you. “I woke up and there Natalie was, right beside me. And you know my first thought wasn’t what happened to me or-or what the hell is Nat even doing here? I didn’t even pay her any attention the whole first two hours, and you wanna know what I was thinking Carmen?”

“Don’t.” The plea escaped his lips in a whisper your heart clenched at how desolate he looked.

“I laid in that hospital bed, and I looked at those stupid fucking fluorescent lights and I thought; Mikey got it right the first time, why couldn’t I.”

Carmen felt numb, like his whole body had been submerged in an ice bath and no matter how hard he fought to get out, it was like his body and mind were on two different wavelengths. He’d seen that stare before, in the eyes of his brother, the same way Mikey looked at Lee at Christmas dinner all those years ago was the same way you were looking at him now in your living room.

He wasn’t sure if there was a proper reaction to the truth you had just dropped. Mikey was dead, that made things easier, but here you were alive and well from what he could tell and he would have his time to mend things with you if that’s what he wanted. But he wasn’t sure he could stand in such proximity as you at that moment, wasn’t sure if he could even look at you. You had been the second closest person to Mikey, presumably knew he was doing drugs, knew he was spiraling out of control, and followed right after him.

Was there anything Carmy could have done to alter your path? Maybe if he had stayed by your side that night after Christmas you wouldn’t be standing here now talking to him about how badly you wanted to end it all.

Carmy drew in a sharp breath a small sob following it as he tried to control his emotions, he began taking small steps in your direction not sure of what he was going to do, but needing you to know his silence wasn’t because he was disgusted or disappointed in you; but in himself. How easy it would’ve been to keep in contact with you after high school graduation, how easy it would’ve been to just let himself love you and take care of you, be there for you. And as much as he wanted to believe you knowing how he felt would’ve changed much, he knew it was naïve, addiction was an illness and even if Carmen had fought harder to keep you in his life there’s no promise that he wouldn’t have been the one to find you floating in the space between life and death.

He slowly reached out to you, hands carefully grasping your cheeks in his eyes, committing your face to memory, mind racing with all the times he took being able to see it daily for granted. “Ba-baby, tell me you don’t mean that,” he waited, eyes rapidly flicking back and forth from yours. His grip on your face was just loose enough for you to send him the saddest smile he’d ever had the chance to see, “Please?” The broken whisper floated between the two of you before your head softly nodded up and down to confirm that indeed he was almost forced to live without you.

And this time it wasn’t his choice.

Carmy sat on the floor in front of your couch, back resting against it, head tipped back to rest on the cushion face pointed toward the ceiling. All he could hear were the soft breaths escaping you and his thudding heart in his ears. It took a while before you had finally calmed down, Carmy held you in his arms on the floor as the two of you cried. Your sounds lashing against his heart over and over again. He was exhausted, more than he usually was, the night far from what he hoped it would be. He was so overwhelmed by all that you had been willing to reveal to him, that the instinct to do something with his hands as you slept took over, the man dutifully cleaned your kitchen and stored the uneaten food away for you to eat at a later date.

And now here he was, back at your side finally coming to terms with everything he learned. Carmy felt like a fool he had prided himself on his friendship with you, always made it a big deal that you were his friend first, his friend by choice. But it had been almost 10 years since he decided to shut you out of his life with no reason, no explanation why and it was selfish of him. Selfish that he had so blindly pushed you away without a thought to how it would make you feel. Selfish of him to always expect your acceptance and open arms when it was convenient for him to re-enter your life.

He let out a small sigh raising his head from its position on the couch, eyes latching onto the dated picture atop your mantle, your cheesy smile staring back at him as Richie and Mikey surrounded you. His eyes poured over the picture, taking in how happy the three of you looked, and how simple everything was when the two of you were teenagers. A quiet humorless laugh escaped his lips as he reminisced, he was lying to himself if he thought your time as teens was simple, but compared to the lives the two of you were leading it sure as hell did feel that way.

Carmy allowed himself a moment longer to enjoy the happiness the picture exuded. He gave it one last glance before he adjusted his position on the floor, turning slightly so his side was leaned into the couch, eyes landing on your face as you slept. It felt like his heart was constantly breaking whenever he looked at your face, it was evident you’d been crying, the puffiness of your eyes easily giving it away. He reached his hand out, hesitating for just a second before he pushed the hair out of your face palm resting on your cheek as he began to softly stroke in back and forth. Since the first time he saw you this year, this was the most peaceful you had looked, he was glad that sleep had been able to bring you that sense of tranquility, but he wanted that for you always, to feel at peace on any given day and as he watched you back moving up and down to signify the breaths your were taking, he promised himself he’d provide that for you; even if it was only as friends.

“What am I gonna do with you, Baby?” The hoarse words left him in a sigh, a small smile making its way to his lips as he watched your nose scrunch up at the sound of his voice, eyelids slightly twitching.

He watched as you turned to lay on your side, lips brushing across his pulse point a small kiss now decorated his veins. “Still be my best friend?” Carmy laughed at your small voice taking up the space between the two of you. Your eyes slowly fluttered open, thankful that Carmy had figured out how to dim the lights in your living room. “Do you remember that promise we made the summer before seventh grade?” Your voice was scratchy from all the sobbing and borderline screaming from earlier.

Carmen nodded his head, a small smile raised on his lips, hand moving from your cheek to cup the back of your neck. “Of course, I do,” the smile only lasted for so long as he was forced to remember a promise he broke with no regard. “That we’d be best friends no matter what, even though we didn’t want each other’s cooties.” Carmy was happy to hear the sound of your melodious laughter, he spent so much time listening to your broken cries he was afraid he’d never know anything else.

“I’m sorry Carmen, I…I didn’t mean to blow up on you. I think telling you about my overdose…it helped me come to terms with it myself.” Your eyes were lidded, all the crying made them feel heavy, if Carmy wasn’t here in front of you right now you were sure you would’ve been dead asleep.

A small content sigh escaped you as Carmy’s thumb ran back and forth across the side of your neck, “You have nothing to apologize for we-I know I haven’t been a great friend to you these past years. And for that I’m sorry. I wish…I wish I could explain to you why I pushed you away but Baby,” Carmy paused heart thudding in his chest, the words were there, maybe not in the way one would expect but it was you; you would know what he meant even if he was speaking in another language.

“I uh I can’t even explain it to myself. But..I would like for us to be friends again if you’ll have me?” Carmy sent a tight-lipped smile your way, he couldn’t do it. He felt selfish for even thinking now was the time to propose the initial idea in his mind. Maybe it was an excuse, maybe not, but he didn’t think it would be fair to put you in that position. You had just told him such a harrowing truth about yourself and if his first instinct after hearing such was to ask to be more than friends it would feel insincere. Carmy wasn’t even sure you would want a relationship with him, you were sober, and recovering and Carmy wouldn’t allow himself to mess that up for you with his presence having been such a soul-sucking and negative thing in your life these past few years.

“I think that’s just what I need right now…a friend.” It was silent for a moment between the two of you, Carmy had prepared himself for the worst on the drive over, and although he could feel a lump forming in his throat and the ache in his chest, he forced a small smile on his lips upon hearing your words. “You kept it on there?” His eyes found yours confusion marring both of your features, at his silence your hand reached out delicately tracing the pendant settled against his signature white shirt.

Of all the times you’d seen Carmy you knew he still wore his chain, it was a part of him. You had caught glimpses of the gold peeking out from his shirt, but you would have never thought he wore the pendant you’d impulsively bought before leaving New York. You remember regretting having left the newly added accessory on his chain when you left his apartment, sure it made you seem like some desperate lover who had never even actually been a lover, just some girl too naive to see all the signs she was being given.

Your eyes flicked between Carmy’s waiting for his response, his cheeks tinting pink the longer you looked at him for an answer. The hand that wasn’t settled against your skin reached up to rub at the back of his neck. “I nev-I… uh never leave home without it.” The admission made your skin tingle, Carmy’s finger subconsciously tracing the lone letter you carried everywhere with you. “It uh, reminds me of you…of us.”

“There were forget-me-nots in the bouquet Willie made me,” you sent Carmy a small smile, although temporary, the sight of that bouquet filled you with happiness the short time you did spend with it. “Also I know you didn’t have shit to do with the flowers Willie put in that bouquet.” Carmy let out a small laugh face warming at the memory of old man Willie’s meddling.

Your thumb on the pendant began tracing the engraved letter, “This was like my form of a forget me not, something that was permanent, would never wilt with time…I just wanted you to have something to remember me by.” Carmen watched your lips stretch into a small smile, he knew what your words meant, but after learning about all you’d gone through it felt like your final words had a double meaning like if things had gone as you wished them to, this would be the only piece he had left of you.

A part of you felt shy sharing the reasoning behind gifting Carmy the pendant, the two of you were barely friends as it was and the flowers had been so personal to you, that you weren’t sure you wanted to let Carmy into that piece of your world even though he played a huge part in it without even knowing.

“Is that what they signify? Remembrance?” Carmen’s thumb ran back and forth across the scar on your jaw, tapping it twice to pull your attention to his.

You gave the pendant one last longing look, dropping it before your eyes finally locked on his, “Something like that.” You shrugged having to swallow the urge to confide in Carmen one last time tonight.

The two of you stayed like that with Carmy’s hand holding onto the side of your face, thumb trying to imprint the jaggedness of your scar to its memory. Your eyes became heavier the longer Carmy delicately stroked your face. The man made no move to wake you as you slowly began drifting back into the world of dreams, the same look of peacefulness he saw earlier had easily returned, the ghost of your past so evidently marked into your skin in the shape of your scars. He felt like he was able to finally release the breath he’d been holding in, his eyes skated across your face; a face he always considered to be a work of art, one he could never perfectly capture on paper.

As he watched you sleep Carmen came to terms with exactly what was left between the two of you now. For all intents and purposes the two of you were friends again, or at least on friendly terms, and as much as he tried to convince himself he would be happy to keep you in his life in whatever capacity you allowed; he knew that was a lie. But the only person he could really lay blame on was himself, you had been ready and waiting for him before he even realized he loved you and now that he was finally ready to take that next step with you there was no longer space in your heart for him.

Carmen watched you for a moment longer, thumb lingering against your scar before he finally had enough restraint to pull himself away. There was a part of him that would’ve stayed planted in that spot all night just to watch over you, make sure the moment he turned his back you wouldn’t suddenly disappear never to be gazed upon by him again. He quietly stood up, careful not to make too much noise and wake you, hand grabbing the blanket lying atop the head of your couch before he gently draped it across you.

He lingered in front of you every fiber in his body, willing him to stay there by your side, to be there when you woke up. But moments like that were no longer his to take; they never had been. Carmy let out a sorrowful sigh before he bent down to your level placing a soft kiss full of love and longing to the indentation between your eyebrows. What could have been, what never was would always stick with him but he would set his wants and needs to the side, and he would appreciate having another moment with you still in his life.

The two of you had seemed to come to an understanding now, and that’s all he could ask for. You said you needed a friend and that’s what he’d be; your needs were his needs.

a/n: in honor of turning twenty-three i present thee with the gift of suffering 🤪, anyway not sure how i feel about this chapter but we shall see. also i know it seems like everything between baby and carmy may have been resolved rather quick, but i feel like everything is very not obviously resolved. happy readings! 🤍

also: huge shoutout to @mr-robot-x for her impeccable song recs when it comes to this fic and the losers i write about. asleep by the smith’s heavily inspired this chapter. (which you would all know if you took my song inspo seriously 😐) just kidding but seriously it genuinely helped me get through this chapter! 🤍

[princesskaulitz]

Can you do Bill fluff? ( Fem reader please!) I don't mind the era!

pillow fort

✮ bill kaulitz fluff

✮ bill x fem! reader, fluff, 2005 bill

✮ conclusion: you’re his new neighbor and he really likes you. (i didn’t proofread but i don’t think there’s many errors anyways)

✮ A/N: tysm for requesting 🥰 I hope you guys like this. this is my first long fluff so i really hope it’s not ass.

you’re the new girl in bill’s neighborhood. he lives right across the street from you. his mom and your mom became friends really quickly when his mom brought over some desserts as a welcome gift to your family. his mom and your mom got to talking and found they actually have a lot in common with one another and they wanted the twins and you to meet.

when you first met the twins, you thought bill was adorable. he had such a contagious smile and a soothing voice. tom was really chill and funny.

bill thought you were beautiful and he was super shy with you. tom could tell that bill was attracted to you, he just hoped that his shy brother would actually make a move on you.

your moms decided to go on a mall trip that weekend and offered you and the twins to go.

you sat in the backseat of the car between them. bill loved the close proximity. the way your thigh was touching his. sure there was plenty of room for him to move his thigh but he didn’t want to. he also loved the way he could smell your perfume and your shampoo. you looked over at him and admired him. you loved his makeup, his eyebrow piercing, his nose, his lips, his jawline. he could feel your eyes on him and he tried not to blush.

throughout this mall trip, tom was the one doing all the talking and he was desperately trying to get bill close to you. growing up, he’s always watched bill wait for girls to make the first move, being too shy but he wanted bill to be the one to do it this time. whenever your back was turned, tom would push bill closer to you, receiving a warning look from bill each time.

at this point, tom figured the best thing to do would be to do just disappear unnoticed, leaving you and bill alone.

bill tuned around and noticed tom was gone. “where is tom?” he asked. you stopped and looked around “hm… i don’t know. maybe he went to the bathroom?” you replied. bill tried to text tom, only receiving a “just talk to her, learn to loosen up” in response. “damn it” bill cursed under his breath. bill wanted to burst. how could tom just leave him in the dust like this? without tom, he worried he’d make things awkward.

but that wasn’t what happened at all. you guys went into stores together and learned what kinds of things each other liked, what you guys had in common and this is what loosened him up a little and you guys clicked almost instantly. he was helping you pick out clothes and you two wound up playing that one game where one person walks along the clothing racks, running their hand along the clothes and when the other person says stop, that’s the piece of clothing the person has to try on and you’d do that for the whole outfit.

you dared bill to do it in the women’s clothing and he wound up in a skirt, a blouse that looked like something an old lady would wear to church and a sun hat. you both giggled and laughed and he was too embarrassed to come out of the dressing room. he dared you to do the same thing in the men’s clothing and you wound up in some tan khaki shorts that were like baggy jeans on you, a pain white t-shirt and a leather jacket that looked like the one michael jackson wore in his thriller music video.

after that, you two went and got ice cream and reviewed the ridiculous pictures you took of each other in your stupid outfits.

you eventually joined back with tom and your mom’s. you and bill were in your own world together, just yapping, never seeming to shut up, just when tom thought you two would finally shut up, bill opened his mouth again, opening discussion of some other random topic like music or food. he wasn’t annoyed though. he just smiled.

by the time you two got home, you didn’t want to depart from each other. you guys asked and your mom let you and bill have a sleepover. you guys stayed in the living room and made a pillow fort out of the couch cushions and throw blankets, of course while hitting each other with pillows and cussing playfully at each other, even throwing snacks at each other, bill laughed when he smacked you in the forehead with a twizler. you jumped on bill, wrapping a blanket around him and it sent you both plummeting to the floor with laugher. he blushed at the way your arms wrapped around him and how you landed on him.

all your fun and games were ruined however by your mom telling you both it was time to quiet and wind down, telling you guys to clean up your food mess, saying you and bill had it looking like “toddler lunch time at a daycare.”

you guys turned off all the lights and crawled into your pillow fort, you used your old pillow pet that projected stars for light.

bill and you sat in silence for a moment as you looked up at the make shift stars.

“so you don’t have a boyfriend right?”

“no. why do you ask?”

“just wondering… i think you’re super cute and i’d be disappointed if you had a boyfriend.”

you smiled and blushed. bill turned to you, propping himself up on his arm, a hint of a mischievous smile playing on his soft lips.

“have you ever kissed a boy?”

you were embarrassed to admit it “….no”

bill’s smile widened. “do you know how?”

“well… i’m not sure.”

“…want me to teach you?” he absolutely thought he was the shit right now. tom would be so proud of him right now.

you smiled. “yeah… teach me some tricks.”

his shy blush creeped up his cheeks again. he could try and be as bold and sassy as he wanted to but he’ll always be a shy, soft boy at heart and though his demeanor was bold, his lips and touch were gentle. his hand rested on the side of your face as his lips moved in sync with yours.

you were stunned to feel his tongue sneak into your mouth. you made out for what felt like forever, until your tongues were sore and your lips were numb, your tongue toyed with his tongue piercing, his hand gently tangled in your hair before it traveled along your shoulder, down your arm, gently squeezing it. you pulled away from each other but your gaze on each other’s eyes didn’t pull away. “wow” bill breathed out, a pink blush on his pale cheeks.

“actually…. i do have a boyfriend”

bills face faltered. “what?”

“you’re my boyfriend”

he punched you on the arm. “ow!”

“don’t do that, i thought i was going to shit my stomach out.”

“don’t punch me you punk!” you started punching him back, earning laughs from him as he fought back. he pinned you down and started tickling you, you screamed and thrashed around, ruining your guys pillow fort.

you both wound up just sleeping on top of the pile of pillows and blankets, cuddling. he spooned you, his face buried in your hair, your legs tangled together, his breath on the back of your ear while you held his hand close to your chest.

he couldn’t wait to talk tom’s ear off about all this.

[maizylx]

Kafka x f!reader NSFW- minors dni

"I can 'lead' you"

Sub f!reader, fingering, strap riding, lingerie, tying and controlling you with her ability,

Words: 2000+

You were having an absolute blast at the mall with your friends, thanks to Kafka generously providing some spending money. With the guilt of splurging your own funds lifted, you indulged in shopping for clothes and snacks without a care in the world. As you and your friends lounged on a bench in the middle of the mall, surrounded by a mountain of shopping bags and each clutching a refreshing bubble tea, your phone suddenly buzzed in your pocket, jolting you from your peaceful moment.

Curiosity piqued, you retrieved your phone and checked the notification.

It was a message from Kafka. Asking you to meet her in her apartment at 6 pm. How could you possibly refuse? You eagerly accepted the invitation, though a hint of nervousness fluttered in your stomach for no valid reason. After all, it wasn’t uncommon for Kafka to invite you over to her room almost every week for various activities behind closed doors. When Kafka mentioned she had a surprise in store for you, your curiosity was piqued even further.

Your friends couldn’t help but notice the flush creeping up your cheeks and seized the opportunity to tease you. “Is your boyfriend texting you?” they chimed in with amusement. You shook your head vehemently, hastily tucking your phone away. “I don’t even have a boyfriend!” you muttered, sitting up from the bench with an annoyed huff, taking a sip from your nearly empty bubble tea. As you made your way towards the trash can to discard the cup, your attention was suddenly captivated by an intriguing store-a lingerie shop to be exact.

With the idea of surprising Kafka with a thoughtful gift in mind, you made your way into the store, determined to find the perfect seductive undergarments that would surely bring a smile to her face. You knew she would appreciate the gesture, and the idea of showing up with something so alluring made you feel a rush of excitement.

Aware that your sudden disappearance might worry your friends, you quickly informed them of your intentions. “Guys, I’m just going to check out that store real quick,” you gestured towards a harmless-looking shop, ensuring they wouldn’t jump to any false conclusions. They nodded in understanding, allowing you the freedom to explore the store without their watchful eyes.

Browsing through the racks, you eventually stumbled upon a cute set of undergarments in a shade that perfectly matched Kafka’s hair color. It was both pretty and seductive, just as you had hoped. Securing the set in your grasp, you made sure no one could snatch it away from you before indulging your curiosity and exploring the rest of the store.

The store offered an array of enticing items, including stockings and elegant nightgowns, but you quickly dismissed the idea of adding anything else to your purchase. That would be pushing it a bit too far. Making your way to the cash register, you finalized your selection and discreetly tucked the purchase into one of your shopping bags for safekeeping. With the surprise safely hidden away, you couldn’t wait to see Kafka’s reaction.

Returning to your friends’ spot with the same number of bags raised a few eyebrows, prompting one of them to inquire if you’d found anything. You shook your head with a faux disappointed sigh. “Sadly no, but I’ve already spent enough for today, so it’s fine. Plus, it’s getting late, so I think I’ll head home,” you explained.

Your friends nodded in understanding, agreeing that it was indeed getting late and they too should probably call it a day. With a round of goodbyes, you parted ways, each heading in your own direction.

Checking the time as you walked, you realized it was nearly time for your 'meeting' with Kafka. Speeding up your pace, you knew you needed to change into your new outfit before meeting her. Arriving home, you swiftly set your shopping bags down, grabbed the undergarments, and changed into them in a hurry.

Glancing at the clock, panic surged within you. It was already five to six, and you knew how much Kafka despised being kept waiting. Your plain outfit would have to suffice for now. After all, you doubted it would stay on for long once you were with her.

Arriving at Kafka’s apartment door at 18:02, you hoped she wouldn’t be too upset about your slight tardiness. The doorbell rang, and Kafka soon appeared, greeting you with her usual smug smile. “Hm, you left me waiting,” she remarked, her voice dripping with sultry allure, though a hint of irritation lingered beneath the surface. Quick to apologize, you explained about having to take your shopping bags home. She simply smiled and tugged you inside by the arm. “I don’t need your apologies in words,” she teased, her tone laden with implications that left you feeling both excited and apprehensive.

Without much time to react, Kafka swiftly pinned you to her bed, leaving you feeling momentarily dizzy from the sudden movement. Your wrists were captured beside your head, held firmly in place as your back sank into the plush cushion of the mattress. Before you could utter a word, she silenced you with a deep, passionate kiss that stole your breath away, leaving your words trapped in your throat. The intensity of her kiss sent a jolt of excitement coursing through you, igniting a fire of desire within.

Breaking away from your lips, Kafka trailed her lips down to your neck sucking and nibbling on the sensitive skin, eliciting a soft gasp from you. Her free hand slipped beneath your top, gliding over the smooth expanse of your stomach, sending shivers of anticipation down your spine. Your sweet reaction drew a chuckle from her lips and after a short while she had removed your top entirely, exposing your skin to the cool air of the room, the contrast with your heated body temperature sending tingles dancing across your skin.

Kafka’s fingers traced the delicate lace of your bra, her touch sending waves of pleasure coursing through you. “How gorgeous,” she purred, her voice dripping with sultry admiration. “I don’t recall you owning such a pretty bra.” With a mischievous grin, she tugged your bra further down so your nipples were visible, her intentions clear as desire smoldered in her eyes.

Her bruised lips trailed even further down to your breasts, and in a swift movement she captured your nipples between her plump lips. A moan escaped your lips, and your hand tangled itself in her wine red hair to pull her lips closer to your body. While her mouth was busy suckling your nipple, her free hand clawed your other breast and squeezed it roughly. Your sweet moans were music in her ears, and she wanted to make you scream even more for her, so she pulled away from your body to take off your bottom. A chuckle rang through her throat as she admired the way the lingerie looked on you.

"I see, someone wants to be fucked like a slut, hm?" Her words made you twitch slightly and you couldn't help but agree with her words. Your expression said everything she needed to know, so the tip of her finger was slowly entering your panties. Due her movements you expected her to take of your panties, but you thought wrong, Instead, she lifted the fabric of your lingerie and let it flick back against your skin playfully, causing a slight redness to bloom on the spot where it made contact.

Her actions were teasing and playful, adding an unexpected element of sensuality to the moment as she continued to watch your reactions with a mischievous glint in her eyes. You couldn't help but whine slightly at the unexpected pain, and she chuckled slightly "I'm sorry, my dear. I was just joking~"

her teasing antics caused your eyes to roll in annoyance and exactly in this moment she suddenly snapped your panties off your body "I don't like it when you roll your eyes in annoyance, I prefer when you roll your eyes in pleasure~" before you could say anything else she silenced you with her fingers brushing against the slit of your. The sensation caused you to shake, and let out a breathy moan. "Already wet, are we?" Kafka mumbled as she felt the dampness between your thighs while spreading your thighs apart.

The tip of her fingers teased your hole, and lightly stretched your tight walls with one finger for now, before adding a second one. Your body reacted on it's own as it started to shiver and clutching her fingers with your walls as if your hole was about to devour her fingers. Her fingers curled up at a sensitive spot of yours which instantly made you moan her name in desperation. You didn't want her to stop but she suddenly pulled her fingers out of you which left you feel empty.

"W-Why did you stop?" You murmured desperately, when she abruptly reached for your squishy little cheeks, cupping your face "Do you remember the 'surprise' i promised you?" You nodded, trying to recall the memories referenced in her messages, but confusion still lingered on your face as to what they had to do with the current situation.

The curious expression you wore prompted Kafka to chuckle softly as she pulled away from you completely. With purposeful strides, she made her way to a drawer, opening a shelf from which she pulled out something. Your eyes widen as she revealed a silicone dick with a strap. "Do you understand now?"

You gulped and now everything made a little more sense; the fingers were just there to stretch you for the following act. Kafka sauntered back to you with a sultry grin, while you sat up, slightly bemused by her antics. “Oh, please, I expected more enthusiasm,” she teased, her expression feigning disappointment, prompting a sigh from you at her playful demeanor. “What exactly do you want to do with it?” you inquired, unsure of her intentions.

Her face adopted a thoughtful expression as she tapped her chin in contemplation. "You could ride me" The suggestion she eventually proposed left you stunned, though a small hint of excitement flickered within you. “But I don’t know how that exactly works,” you admitted hesitantly, feeling a twinge of unease at the prospect of doing something wrong.

However, Kafka simply laughed, dismissing your concerns with a wave of her hand. “It seriously can’t be that hard. But if you’re really that nervous, I could ‘lead’ you,” she suggested with a playful tilt of her head, her implication not lost on you.

"Okay, fine, let’s try it out,” you agreed reluctantly, giving in to her enthusiasm. Kafka’s satisfied grin only served to heighten your curiosity as she sat down on the bed and clasped the strap around her waist, anticipation building between you as you came closer to her, when suddenly you had difficulties to move.

“Why are you looking like that? I thought you wanted me to lead you,” Kafka purred with a smug smile, her confidence palpable as she guided your body onto her body. With a swift movement, she manipulated the strange pink strings connected to her fingers, wrapping them around your body until you were completely enveloped by them. With another flick of her wrist, she effortlessly lifted your thighs into the air, making your clit kiss the tip of the silicone cock, and she was lowering you even further and further down on her strap.

You could feel the strap entering you and you let out a loud gasp at the sensation. As Kafka’s hand began to move, the strings followed suit, controlling your body’s movements in perfect synchronization. The sensation of being moved without exerting any effort yourself was both strange and exhilarating, and you found yourself enjoying the pleasure despite the initial surprise. With the strings doing all the work, you were able to relax and simply go along for the ride.

Kafka grinned in satisfaction as you moaned and threw your head back in pleasure. She sped the movement a little up and made your tight hole take all of her. Your walls clenched around the strap and your moans turned breathless and strained. Her gaze shifted between your flushed face and your jiggling breasts, and she just had to squeeze one of your pretty breast with her hand. The double stimulation made you whimper her name desperately And you felt yourself coming closer to the point. Kafka noticed that you were close so she tilted her head in curiosity

"Oh that soon already?" she cooed in amusement and made you move even faster up and down. The only thing you could do is nod as you were so full of pleasure to do anything else at this point and then suddenly you let yourself go. Your eyes rolled back, your whole body was trembling, you curled your nails in your palm. Your pussy was dripping with cum and the silicone cock was covered in your juices.

The hand on your breast was loosing up and after a time, the strings were finally removed, allowing you to move freely once again. You collapsed onto the bed next to Kafka with a soft thud, breathing heavily, your lips parted in exhilaration. “Did you have fun, my dear?” Kafka asked, her hand tenderly caressing your cheek as you could only nod in response, still reeling from the excitement of the experience.

"Maybe we should do this again some time~"

[mizutenshii]

HOLD ME.

— pairing ; kaneki ken x human!gn!reader

— summary ; small spoon kaneki just wants to feel safe and comforted in your arms.

— cw ; fluff, comfort, kaneki is the tiniest small spoon, est. relationship, more fluffiest fluffy fluff, okay maybe a lil angst

you never knew when kaneki would return.

you never knew if kaneki would return.

sometimes he vanished for days on end, weeks, even. he always told you not to worry, that he was fine and that he would come back eventually. yeah, you'd heard that before, and suddenly your lover came back as a ghoul after leaving you worried for weeks. adapting to said change had cost you so much, and his habit of disappearing got so much worse.

but he was right about one thing; he always came back.

sometimes he returned and he was genuinely fine. you didn't want to know what he had been up to, but he didn't seem too damaged by it – mentally and physically.

sometimes he returned and pretended to be okay. you always saw right through him when this happened. yet, no matter how hard you would pry, he wouldn't open up.

sometimes it was barely even kaneki who returned, as the empty shell of the boy you loved showed up on your doorstep in the ungodliest hours of the night. whether his injuries were physical or mental, he couldn't even begin to pretend he was fine, tears staining his cheeks as he stumbled over to you.

tonight prove itself to be the latter.

it had been three weeks since you had last heard from your beloved ghoul, and you had given up to wait for him every night before you went to sleep. it was pointless, for you could never tell when he would come back.

hence, you went to sleep like you normally did tonight, barely thinking about kaneki's absense as you had gotten used to it at this point. there was absolutely nothing out of the ordinary as you crawled under your duvets and went to sleep, until a sudden sound shook you from slumber. you sat disoriented for a moment, until you recognized the sound of your window creaking open. hope filled your entire being, and you were wide awake in an instant. kicking off your blankets, you went to the window and opened the blinds to make his entrance a little easier.

but the sight that greeted you wrenched your heart.

physically he seemed fine, skillfully jumping through the windowsil and landing in your bedroom with ease. however, when you saw his face, even in the darkness, the true depth of last weeks' scars became apparent. you didn't know what he had gone through, as he didn't like to talk about it, but it was obvious that it broke him.

"kaneki," you whispered, stumbling backward a little when the half-ghoul flung his arms around you in utter despair. he was tearing at the seams, finally breaking now that he was safe in your arms.

he was crying, tears trickling down his face and staining the fabric of the t-shirt you wore. sobs racked his body, shaking the broken boy to a point where it was getting hard for him to breathe properly. you had seen this many times before, yet it still broke your heart every time it happened.

"kaneki, love," you repeated, a little firmer this time. you peeled his ridid body off of yours for a moment to look at him properly. quickly scanning his features for any injuries, your eyes ran up and down his being. much to your relief, nothing caught your eye and you quickly hugged him tightly again.

you didn't ask questions, you didn't demand answers. you were pretty sure kaneki would answer whatever you asked, but you didn't want to know about his ghoul-ish business – that likely involved human consumption and other horrors. yes, you had accepted your lover's half-ghoul side, but that didn't mean you wanted all the ins and outs of his new life.

ignorance was bliss.

however, you still cared about him deeply, and seeing kaneki completely miserable like that made an iron hand clasp your heart, squeezing tightly until it was getting hard to breathe.

"you're with me, kaneki," you spoke softly into his ear. "you are safe and no one is coming here to harm you."

now it was kaneki who looked at you through the tears that clung to his lashes. the pain in his eyes was obvious, but he still cared about you more than he cared about himself.

"i woke you, didn't i?" he muttered, voice already a little hoarse from the sobs that hurt his throat.

"yes, but i'm glad you did," you countered gently. "you don't have to suffer on your own. i am here for you, love."

"mhm," kaneki hummed, melting into your touch. his breathing was labored, and you could tell his throat was being squeezed by unkempt emotions.

"c'mere," you urged softly, removing yourself from the embrace to pull him over towards your bed.

the half-ghoul looked like a kicked puppy when you broke the hug, but as soon as he understood your intentions he came with you obediently. his motions were ridig with tension, and he was way too pliant for your liking. whatever happened in the time he was away, it seriously messed with him.

you sat down on the edge of your bed, pulling him with you. the mattress dipped underneath your combined weight, and you were quick to lay down and get comfortable. lifting the covers invitingly, you asked for kaneki to join you in bed – which he gladly did.

he shuffled closer to you until his back was tightly pressed against your chest, and he released a deep breath when your arms wrapped around him from behind. he made himself as small as possible, trying to inch even closer to you – though it was physically impossible. the ghoul fit so perfectly against you, as if you were two pieces meant to mesh together.

kaneki's sole purpose was to survive, there was barely any room for some leeway. he always had to be on guard, putting up a tough act and not show any weakness. that was his life.

only when he was with you, he could let his inner battles roam freely. only when he was with you, he could be himself. only when he was with you, he could be small and safe.

your chin rested atop his head – that was how small he had made himself. he was almost completely quiet now, and you assumed his tears had ceased. he was breathing normally; kaneki had calmed down for a big part already, the magic of your presence, your touch, your soothing voice that was filled with love towards him.

kaneki was a monstruous humanoid, commiting atrocities left and right, ending the lives of innocent people in order to keep himself alive, leaving a trail of bloodshed and demise. it uses to be hard to look past that, but you had soon realized it had never been his choice. life could be cruel to some, and kaneki was one of its victims. cursed to rely on human flesh to survive, no matter how much he didn't want to.

acceptance would be an overstatement. you'd never approve of his lifestyle, no matter how much it was beyond his power. but you knew you had to live with it if you wanted to live with your lover.

it was an easy choice.

the boy in your arms had fallen asleep, finally finding peace. you pressed a kiss to the top of his head, pale strands of hair tickling your skin. you'd always be his safe haven, you would try not to judge him for his foul actions, you'd shower him with love and kindness. kaneki might have been a monster, the monsters and demons that pestered his mind were far worse.

but he was safe with you, he was loved by you, and he knew. that's why he always came back. you were his everything in a world that gave him nothing but misery. you were his remedy when the world tore him down once more.

kaneki always acted tough, but he showed you who he really was; a boy, way too troubled for his age, bent down by the weight of the harsh world he got caught up in, a broken soul who just needed a little love.

and you'd give it to him, over and over again.

mizutenshii — O6.1O.2O23 — masterlist