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thenicedolphin · 7 years ago

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Oscars Analysis With Biting Commentary: 2018 Edition!

We are BACK. And earlier than ever (I don’t know if that’s true, but compared to last year) with the 6th annual Oscars post from The Nice Dolphin (see links here for 2017, 2016, 2015, 2014, 2013), where Matt provides eye-opening, awe-inspiring commentary while Alex stumbles in, rambling about how Deadpool deserves all the Oscars even though it came out two years ago. As always, Matt is in regular font, and Alex comes in with the BOLD.

Best Picture: “Call Me by Your Name” “Darkest Hour” “Dunkirk” “Get Out” “Lady Bird” “Phantom Thread” “The Post” “The Shape of Water” “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri”

It’s been an unconventional year for nominees. The Shape of Water and Three Billboards are surprising leading contenders, as both are divisive. A lot of my friends loved one and disliked the other. I’m pro-Shape and anti-Billboards.

So unconventional. For me, the movies fall into two distinct tiers: Get Out and Not Get Out. We need more nuance than that? Okay, here’s how it breaks down:

Simply the best: Get Out Some level of greatness: Lady Bird, The Shape of Water, Phantom Thread Good, but not great: Call Me by Your Name, Dunkirk Shitty, yet inoffensive: The Post Makes Crash look like Do the Right Thing: Three Billboards (I’m not typing out the whole title)

I didn’t see Darkest Hour. In fact, I just learned that it’s not called “The Darkest Hours.” Faithful TND readers will know that I appreciate some economy when it comes to naming shit, but if I wanted to see a great Churchill impression, I’d just watch old YouTube clips of Jay Pharoah.

The Shape of Water is a really beautiful film. The lead characters are all really memorable, and the look of the film had me in awe at different moments. The filmmaking and storytelling took a premise that was almost predictable and majorly elevated it. I preferred Shape of Water to Del Toro’s previous major-nominated film, Pan’s Labyrinth. Shape of Water is probably my third favorite film of the nominees, behind Get Out and Lady Bird.

Yooooooo she fucked a fish! More than once! I loved how everyone was so nonchalant about it too. Like, when she first sees the fish, she IMMEDIATELY starts seducing it. When Octavia Spencer hears about it, instead of being horrified, she’s all “ayo, how’s his dick work?” I’m not even exaggerating.

The movie was a bit off-putting at first, but once you realize it’s more of a fairy tale than a grounded, sci-fi film, the wacky elements really come together to tell a nice little story. Watching this, I was like “damn, why does Matt love this movie so much?” Then I saw the fish doin a little Broadway shuffle in black and white. “All. The pieces. Fit.” - Lester Freamon

Also, those pies looked disgusting. I’m glad it turned out they were supposed to be gross, because I was seriously doubting my ability to judge a pie for a minute there.

Get Out is basically a perfect story. I’ve seen it twice and the second time helped to reinforce that. The story is so clever, the references and nuances so plentiful, the genre-bending and mix of humor and horror so well-played. The race elements are incredible - every element of a black boyfriend meeting his white girlfriend’s family are played perfectly. Every line that hints at the underlying horror of this super-white community play as both funny and horrifying satire. There are so many layers included in the lines about black male stereotypes of virility and athletic ability.

Get Out is super fun too. Lil Rel Howery has an amazing role - that dude cracked me up. Daniel Kaluuya handles his role really well, and Allison Williams does a good job leaning into her Girls role. And Bradley Whitford… nothing like TWO obnoxious white guy performances (douchey board member in The Post) to offset his West Wing persona.

It won’t win (the Academy hates ball-jiggling), but Get Out is the best film of 2017, assuming Deadpool really came out in 2016. Like Matt said, it’s equal parts hilarious and horrifying, while still getting its point across in a way that feels natural and never forced. Get Out holds up on a re-watch as well. If anything, it’s a totally different experience, as so much of what you see/what is said takes on a new meaning.

Lady Bird is near perfect too. While I love Moonlight, Get Out and Lady Bird are both films that are a lot more enjoyable for me to rewatch and enjoy the depths of. They are also both not Oscar-conventional films, which unfortunately leads them not to have much of a shot at winning Best Picture. A shame, considering both were basically the best reviewed of 2017.

Lady Bird is a great film. I loathe coming-of-age movies, but Lady Bird manages to keep things realistic and for the most part avoids caricatures, tropes, and plot beats common to the genre. As someone who went to Catholic high school, I was prepared for the hackiest of jokes, but aside from the awful “abortion assembly” scene (which was still necessary to move the plot forward), I wasn’t even mad.

HAVING SAID THAT, it’s no Get Out and it’s certainly no Moonlight. No shit it’s easier to re-watch. Let’s Be Cops is easier to re-watch than Moonlight too, but does that mean it’s better? No! Lady Bird tells a small story and tells it well, but it’s not a life-spanning epic where a boy, a teen, and a man who looks like 50 Cent discover truths about themselves, the people in their lives, and their environments in a beautiful, heart-rending way.

You’d think Lady Bird would be another Juno (and I love Juno!), but it is less cute and better written. And better acted too… Saiorse Ronan’s acting goes way beyond Ellen Page’s. Lady Bird, like Get Out, has no wasted scenes. Callback lines at a plethora. A perfect grasp of its era (2002-2003 school year) that definitely connected for a 2005 high school graduate like myself. The brilliance of Lady Bird is that it takes all its characters seriously while being a really funny movie, such as the nun/Lady Bird’s advisor who isn’t played for a stereotype. Lady Bird’s various love interests and friends are well-acted, full personalities. I think about the cool girl she gets to know, who could have just been treated as a bimbo, but definitely isn’t treated as such.

I did think this was going to be another Juno. Not that I’ve seen Juno, but man that movie looked awful.

Lady Bird is a confident story. It’ll make you laugh, knowing that in like 10 seconds you’ll want to cry and feel emotional.

Matt cried several times.

The acting is all great… Saiorse is a star, and Laurie Metcalf is awesome as her mom. Supporting characters all crush it, whether her brother, brother’s girlfriend, her lovable dad, or her classmates.

Let’s contrast that with Three Billboards. Three Billboards is the third film of longtime playwright Martin McDonagh. I love his first film, In Bruges. McDonagh makes films that are dark, dark comedies. While this worked well with In Bruges, I found that Billboards was far too jarring tonally and too ambitious for its own good.

Let’s call Three Billboards what it is: a steaming pile of crap. This was the worst movie I’ve seen in a long time -- and I’ve seen All the Money in the World! And La La Land!

The movie Matt lovingly referred to as “Three Shitstains” was starting to get some backlash for the tone-deaf way it took on race in America, but that was only like, the fifth worst thing about it. The tone was terrible. It wasn’t a “dark comedy,” but a bunch of dark shit with some awful slapstick thrown in the mix. At least the Three Stooges have DIGNITY.

The acting is great, and Billboards has gotten many acting nominations as a result.

This movie was so poorly written, I can’t even tell if the acting was good. It wasn’t enough for Rockwell to be a typical racist, angry, small town momma’s boy; he had to be Forrest Gump on top of that. McDormand was written as this tough-as-nails badass, but that’s not who she was at all. The billboards were pathetic, not some masterstroke. Woody lets the air out of that shit five minutes into the movie when he reveals that they legit worked on the case and nothing turned up. The rest of the characters were so 2-D they wouldn’t have passed muster in The Lego Movie (more on that later).

The movie is far too uneven. It’s possibly the least rewatchable Best Picture movie as a result, though I do wonder if a second viewing will go better.

It won’t.

Billboards is about a mother whose daughter was raped and murdered, angry that the local police haven’t found the killer yet, leading her to call out the police chief in the titular billboards. Within the story, we have a temperamental, racist cop played by Rockwell, who the police chief thinks can become a better person. We have themes of race and violence. We have an abusive ex-husband. And we have clashing tones that don’t work, almost saved by excellent acting. Almost.

(It wasn’t that close.)

In Bruges had themes about depression and acts of violence that were really well thought out, where the character’s darkness was respected while there were still hilarious scenes throughout. Three Billboards bites off more than it can chew with the racist, violent cop (who, before the movie’s story takes place, was infamous for torturing a black guy in the jail), attempting a redemption arc that fails to satisfy. In the end, I felt like I just had to accept that the movie was treating his arc as redemption and ignoring several unforgivable things he did that weren’t given the full attention they deserved. It gave me flashbacks to the racist white cop story in Crash. Can redemption work? Yes. Can it work if you write your story poorly? Nah dawg.

Billboards gets too cute with its humor clashing with violence… I think of a scene of spousal abuse cutting to a joke mid-scene. It is also unclear and lacking in confidence on how much we’re supposed to like or dislike the main characters - I could not tell if McDonagh wanted us to like or dislike Frances McDormand’s motives or tell-off speeches in various scenes. And the movie is worse for it.

This is the ultimate “fake deep” movie. It’s got bullshit posing as poignancy with enough stupidity thrown in (McDormand kicking kids in the crotch, midget jokes) so dumbasses can latch onto it to feel smart.

Lastly, a common note I’ve seen is how McDonagh, who has lived in Ireland/England most of his life, wrote this script in 2010, prior to the Black Lives Matter movement, prior to Ferguson/Trayvon Martin. And.. it definitely shows in the script.

Beyond that, McDonagh wants to show us “real” America, but nothing about the movie is remotely realistic or has even the faintest whiff of consequence.

One more gripe: Woody Harrelson’s character’s wife is played by an Australian actress who seems just to be a casting favorite of McDonagh’s. And she keeps her Australian accent… despite being the wife of a police chief in rural Missouri. What? How does that make sense?

It doesn’t.

They should’ve gotten the bear from Paddington 2 to play Chief Willoughby, if only because we’d get the line “You got a real nice cock, Mr. Paddington.”

After my top tier of Get Out, Lady Bird, and The Shape of Water, I dug Phantom Thread, Dunkirk, and Call Me By Your Name next.

I’d bump Phantom Thread up into that top tier, but I ain’t mad. (I’m a little mad).

Phantom Thread surprised me. It didn’t have much buzz because it was released late, and the trailer didn’t really intrigue me. I shouldn’t have second-guessed Daniel Day-Lewis and Paul Thomas Anderson. Phantom Thread is well-acted (anchored by three great performances), and PTA is a master of filmmaking. This film is darkly comical at times (and in that weird PTA way where most of the audience I was with did not get that aspect), and it is delightful. DDL… what a legend.

Every time I think about Phantom Thread I like it more. Shit is HILARIOUS. Once you realize it’s a rom-com with some fancy trappings, it gets a lot more enjoyable. Some of the most biting insults of the year are in here, and if you’ve never seen someone use asparagus to humiliate their significant other, you owe it to yourself to watch Phantom Thread.

I was in a theater with two other people, one of whom looked borderline homeless, so he might’ve just been there to chill. Still, I was the only one cracking up, which made me feel alone, but smart.

Personal note: When I saw Phantom Thread, I was initially at the theater to see The Post, but the projector broke. Now my MoviePass history has The Post listed twice and Phantom Thread not at all, which is completely inaccurate. I just want this known, so if I die or something and my MoviePass app gets made public, please don’t think I liked The Post that much (or at all). PLEASE BELIEVE ME

Dunkirk was breathtaking in IMAX and a “big” film marvel. It looks incredible, and the action is spectacular, intense, and visceral. Of course, Nolan puts a twist on the storytelling with his structure, and it makes the plot super dramatic and unique. I thought it was a really fun, intense movie, but it loses points for being less memorable afterward. The characters aren’t as impactful (though well-acted), and this is lower in my Nolan films (TDK, Inception, Memento, Batman Begins, Interstellar, and then let’s start considering Dunkirk).

After sifting through indie flicks like Call Me Maybe by Your Name, Lady Bird, and Three Billboards, you really start to appreciate Hollywood production values. Dunkirk looks fantastic. The wide shots, the desolation of the beach, the aerial shots with the ocean in the background -- all beautiful.

Beyond the visuals, each individual scene contains great tension, as the soldiers are put into scenario after scenario of terror. However, when you start to stack those scenes up, the larger story never really comes together.

Spoilers

The story of Dunkirk is basically “We can’t get out! Oh wait...we can get out now.” The actual rescue scenes are so easily done that it kind of undercuts much of the drama preceding it. Also, my man Georgie...what are you even doing??? His is the most pathetic on-screen death in recent memory. Even the soldiers are mocking him! Had to re-watch The Killing of a Sacred Deer just to get the taste of laughter out of my mouth.

Spoilers over

Call Me By Your Name was anchored by a great romance story and a beautiful atmosphere. I wanted to live in that Italian town and eat dinners and read by the lake. The Sufjan songs are typically excellent, and really fit the tone of the movie. Timothée Chalamet as Elio anchors the film, and he nails it as an adolescent teen trying to sort out his sexuality. Armie Hammer is good too, and Michael Stuhlbarg is wonderful as Elio’s compassionate father.

Big year for people fucking fruit in the movies! When dude starts fingering that peach I’m like “this is kinda sexual…” Little did I know, right? Decent crowd in the theater and only one other person laughed at this and when Elio puts Oliver’s stanky-ass swimming trunks on his head like a horny Dumbo.

Disappointed in myself because I enjoyed a Sufjan Stevens song. “Visions of Gideon” is a certified banger. I was jamming out over the ending credits when it slowly dawned on me that I was listening to Sufjan. Cried myself to sleep that night.

Feels weird to say, but this movie needed to show pipe. How you gonna have a movie about a dude discovering his sexuality with another dude and cut away to a tree branch when they finally do the dew? What a cop-out! Matt helpfully reminded me that they can’t show hard D without getting an NC-17 rating, but still. There were enough shots of them peeing, etc to where we could’ve gotten a peek. The hypocrisy was on full display during the one male/female sex scene when of course they show the tittays.

Last we have The Post and Darkest Hour, which are in my last tier with Three Billboards. Both are solid flicks that I’m cool with getting Best Picture nominations, though I would have preferred seeing Mudbound or The Florida Project get some love here (I, Tonya was also good, but I’m fine with it not making it).

I, Tonya was far better than The Post and Three Billboards (I avoided seeing Dankest Hour in favor of getting a head start on the 2019 Oscar post). Also, I wanna give some love to Detroit! It came out forever ago to no fanfare, but it’s a great flick that everyone should see. Brutal, heartbreaking, poignant, and sadly all-too-relevant in today’s times.

The Post has two main stories, and I much preferred the story of these reporters looking for the Pentagon Papers and researching/writing things vs the Kay Graham story. While I think that Kay Graham was a legend who held a great influence throughout her career, I’m not sure how deftly her story was handled. The Post feels like if someone chose to do a movie telling the story of SNL in the mid-2000s and the movie focused on 1. The cast working to satirize George W. Bush and other political figures and 2. A subplot where women kept approaching Tina Fey to tell her how brave she was for becoming the first female headwriter of the show. Throwing two separate stories like that together? Not a great combo.

You might say it’s “the Cyclops of white movies.”

Also, The Post chooses to play up Kay’s story in ways that I didn’t enjoy. Spielberg made this film quickly and wanted it out by the end of 2017 because of the current political atmosphere, and the script overplays it. I didn’t need the movie emphasizing her influence on women as much as it did. (Spoilers: scenes like the government counsel’s staffer recognizing her and commending her at SCOTUS, or her being ignored by the press while leaving, as a crowd of women fawn over her walking by).

The Post takes some fascinating source material and tells it in the boringest way possible. Kay Graham’s involvement in this seriously the least interesting thing about it. Literally anything else would’ve made a better movie: them writing the Pentagon Papers, them acquiring the papers, the Post vs. the Times, writing the stories, the ensuing legal battle/victory. Who gives a shit about some wrinkly old white woman suddenly deciding to grow a spine?

Unfortunately, this was the ONLY thing Spielberg cared about. The rest of the film was embarrassingly low-quality. That war scene in the beginning? Shit looked like something out of a sitcom flashback. Tom Hanks�� character was insufferable and his Tim-Allen-as-Batman accent did not help. I think they got the protest rally shots from an old That 70s Show B-roll. The trifecta of Tom Hanks’ wife literally having to state the thesis of the movie (“It’s hard being a woman!”), a young woman of color getting chewed out by her old, white boss (like we didn’t just spend two hours watching Hanks say way worse things to his staff), and Meryl’s “angel from Heaven” descent down the courthouse steps was awful. Also Carrie Coon announcing the court decision only to get interrupted by some fat white guy we’ve never seen before was the final bizarre decision in a movie full of them.

The Post felt like a pretty safe Oscar film that had some good parts and some mixed parts. It had some on-the-nose scenes and some inexplicable scenes. It also had one of the cornier last scenes that I’ve seen in recent years…

Darkest Hour is similar. Solid, safe film with flaws. Oldman is awesome as Winston Churchill, and the political behind-the-scenes leading up to and during Dunkirk are really intriguing. And that’s most of the film, so it works really well. The film fails to have many good supporting characters, such as Lily James in a thankless role as Churchill’s assistant, being given plot/backstory whenever it’s relevant to Churchill’s storyline. The movie also suffers from some meandering towards the end.

Darkest Hour? Gary Old Man? Yeah, I’m good.

I really enjoyed Mudbound, which may have lost some buzz by being a Netflix film. Netflix has gotta work on that. It’s still not a pitch-perfect film with some boring parts in the first half, but man, that last quarter of the film really hits hard. Meanwhile, The Florida Project aimed higher and had higher highs (how many times can I write high (CAN WE GET MUCH HIGHER)). Though it struggles when there were too many scenes of the kids playing around, the themes and its unique subject matter are so, so good. Its creativity and boldness were refreshing too. I gotta check out Tangerine by the same director, Sean Baker.

Tangerine is great! Donut Time is closed down though :(

Director: “Dunkirk,” Christopher Nolan “Get Out,” Jordan Peele “Lady Bird,” Greta Gerwig “Phantom Thread,” Paul Thomas Anderson “The Shape of Water,” Guillermo del Toro

It looks like del Toro should win it, and he would be worthy. His vision and execution were marvelous. It’s such a visual treat, from the design of the monster, to the fashion and decor, to the feel of the scenes.

What a visual treat it was to see a fish gettin it in! I wouldn’t be mad at a GDT win here. Solid economy of storytelling, and the overall vision, themes, and motifs all worked together to create a great sense of feeling and wonderment, which you need when you’re making a movie about fish love.

Nolan was awesome per usual, with some amazing action and jaw-dropping uses of real stunts and IMAX cameras. I’m glad he got his first directing nod.

Typical Nolan: dope visuals and a lot of overwrought music drowning out boring characters and a weak story.

Gerwig and Peele are both amazing talents who made brilliant first feature films. I guess Best Director doesn’t usually go to simpler films (see: Inarritu’s dumb back-to-back wins for spectacle films). But man they were good at their craft.

If I had my druthers, I’d give it to my man Jordan Peele. His was a truly singular vision helped along by deft world-building and a perfect tonal balance. The exact opposite of Martin McDonagh’s work on Three Billboards. Greta Gerwig did a nice job, but she’s no Peele.

PTA is awesome too. He apparently also worked on the cinematography with the rest of his crew, which is cool.

PTA did his thing on ‘em, bringing his unique flavor of dark humor mixed with some heavy emotional content.

Mainly, I’m just glad Martin McDonagh didn’t get a nod here.

Lead Actor: Timothée Chalamet, “Call Me by Your Name” Daniel Day-Lewis, “Phantom Thread” Daniel Kaluuya, “Get Out” Gary Oldman, “Darkest Hour” Denzel Washington, “Roman J. Israel, Esq.”

Oldman is the favorite, both for a notable impersonation and his entire body of work. Oldman is a great actor, and I can’t fault him getting the award. I did enjoy his performance and the movie’s flaws are not because of it. One note: I haven't seen The Queen yet to see if he’s that much better as Churchill than John Lithgow, but cmon, how impressive is it when a bunch of dudes are able to play Churchill?

Oldman is just that -- an old man. Maybe die already and let some youngbloods get their shine??? Just kidding, I have nothing against Commissioner Gordon. I’m sure he did great here and now has a go-to Halloween costume for later this year to boot.

I prefer Chalamet’s detailed and nuanced in his portrayal of Elio. Chalamet just nails all the facial tics and body language, along with crushing scenes when asked (the film literally relies on his facial reactions during portions of the film).

Chalamet was great! Him crying into the camera as the credits rolled could’ve nuked the entire movie, but it didn’t. So much of the context and depth in “Call Me by Your Name, Daddy” is internal, and the fact that Chalamet was able to get that across to the audience is a real testament to his performance. Also, he banged a peach in real life! That was some method acting!

I love me some Daniel Day, and if this is his actual last role, then bravo. He is brilliant as a fashion designer who is super picky and unique. He’s such a prick at times, he’s such a baby at times, and he’s so funny all the way through. I get that they want to reward someone else. But man… DDL is the best.

If they ever cross paths, I hope DDL and Chalamet compare notes. DDL: “I learned how to create 1950s-style women’s dresses by hand and actually made a few dozen which I then sold to wealthy aristocrats.” Chalamet: “I put my thing in some fresh fruit and sniffed a guy’s butthole!”

Also, shoutout to the casting director who tapped DDL to play Reynolds Woodcock. How fuggin easy was her job? “Ya know, we really should get DDL to play this part.” “Great job! He fit the role perfectly!”

Kaluuya is really good in Get Out, though I prefer Chalamet/DDL over him. I’m glad that he got a nod for what might normally just be viewed as a horror movie role. Kaluuya’s emotional backstory is key to the film, and he does a great job showing the pain of his past and how it helps form his character’s decisions. Otherwise, Get Out is less an acting showcase than the other films, so less of a ceiling.

It really is great to see a horror movie get this level of love and legitimization. Between Get Out and It, I hope Hollywood production companies realize that actually investing in the horror genre is a profitable move and as a consequence, we continue to see more (and better) horror flicks.

I didn’t see Denzel’s performance. But I think it’s funny that he got this random nod sorta like how Meryl Streep gets nods for just about any role. People just love Denzel at this point. Franco might have deserved the nod for The Disaster Artist, where he was both hilariously weird yet held gravitas as the crazy Tommy Wiseau.

*nods*

No Hugh Jackman (Logan)??? No anyone from Detroit??? Yuck.

Lead Actress: Sally Hawkins, “The Shape of Water” Frances McDormand, “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri” Margot Robbie, “I, Tonya” Saoirse Ronan, “Lady Bird” Meryl Streep, “The Post”

First, I think it’s a shame that Vicky Krieps didn’t get nominated for anchoring Phantom Thread with her role as tortured love interest, Alma. Krieps fills Alma’s personality with timidity, daring, ambition, and man, she’s good. She’s more of a main character than DDL at times, and she holds her own. Krieps went from an unknown to American audiences to having to spar with one of the greatest actors of all time. And she crushed it! I wonder if she was hurt by the film being released late. More people should be talking about this performance.

Vicky Krieps is fantastic. Like Matt said, she went toe-to-toe with DDL and matched him in every scene, never getting lost in the shuffle. She’s gotta be amused with everyone treating her like a no-name newcomer though, since she’s apparently already a star in Poland or wherever the fuck she’s from.

McDormand appears to be the frontrunner, and I thought she was really good. I prefer Saoirse Ronan and Sally Hawkins though. McDormand has a super showy role, and I’m guessing her win was clinched by her various speeches and rants throughout the film. She’s really good. I just don’t like the character due to the writing.

Ugh, McDormand. I guess she was fine. Like I mentioned earlier, her character was so poorly constructed and written, I have no idea if the acting’s any good. Besides Meryl Streep, she’s definitely the worst on here. Streep actually suffered from some of the same issues as McDormand. Her character’s arc is such a drag that the movie came to a screeching halt every time she popped up on screen. It wouldn’t surprise me to learn that Streep and Hanks filmed that breakfast convo on separate coasts.

Ronan is a huge talent, and she’s perfect as Lady Bird. She’s funny, emotional, and a fully-realized teenager. Lady Bird will go down as one of the most famous heroines - I have no doubt.

Since my girl Vicky Krieps didn’t even get a nom, I’ll be pulling for Ronan.

Hawkins is magnetic as Elisa. She was limited as a mute character, but presented herself so well with body language, sign language, and charm. Hawkins imbues her character with such optimism and hope. She treats her friends with such warmth. And she has to portray her interest opposite an actor inside a costume, who also can’t speak. I mean, that’s carrying a lot, and she is brilliant.

To Hawkins’ credit, you really do believe she wants to fuck that fish. Like, there is NO DOUBT. She must’ve been channeling her inner-Chalamet between takes.

Margot Robbie is really good as Tonya Harding and the best part of the movie for me, moreso than Allison Janney (more on that below), though it’s laughable when she has to play a teenager. One scene of note is her preparing for a performance in front of a mirror. It’s one of those acting showcases that really impresses, and she does it well.

Margot Robbie was great as Tonya Harding. I didn’t realize not only how hated Harding was back then, but how hated she is now! I brought this movie up to several people and each was like “UGH! Why would I want to see a movie about Tonya Harding -- she’s the devil! I hate her!” Why would anyone still be mad about this? First of all, it’s figure skating. Second of all, it happened twenty-five years ago, and third of all, Nancy Kerrigan was fine! Get over it, sheeple! Just don’t get me started on the tragedy of Michelle Kwan -- now THAT’S something to still be upset over.

I would replace Streep with Krieps in a heartbeat. Yes, Streep is good as Kay Graham, but Krieps is better, and Streep is the worst of these 5. Honestly, if Kay Graham had been played by Frances McDormand, she would not have been nominated. Streep got the nomination because she’s Meryl Streep.

This might be Matt’s hottest take and it’s 100% correct. /shocked emoji

Supporting Actor: Willem Dafoe, “The Florida Project” Woody Harrelson, “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri” Richard Jenkins, “The Shape of Water” Christopher Plummer, “All the Money in the World” Sam Rockwell, “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri”

Rockwell is expected to win, and he’s pretty good. I can’t get over his character arc though. This character is just… it’s weird! It doesn’t make any sense. Rockwell is a great actor though, and he does the best he can. He’s awesome.

/copy-and-pastes paragraph about Frances McDormand

I love Dafoe’s performance more. The Florida Project’s cast was filled with new actors, and that was mostly good, but Dafoe was amazing. He’s got his scenes here and there, and he makes the screen pop whenever he shows up. Just a genuine good, imperfect dude, managing a hotel.

This movie looked awful. I don’t know if I’m just bitter or I’m suffering from trailer fatigue, but with the exception of Mission Impossible: Fallout and Black Panther, I haven’t seen a single trailer where I didn’t think “this movie looks like trash.” Even for good movies! Step ya trailer game up, Hollywood.

Woody Harrelson was good, but it’s a little silly that his role got in over Hammer or Stuhlbarg in Call Me By Your Name or Michael Shannon in Shape of Water. I didn’t catch Plummer in his role.

I’m serious: replace Woody with Paddington and the movie is immediately 25% better. Woody was fine, but yeah what the shit. Also, Armie Hammer was...not great. Dude was two seconds away from doing a Tiger Woods fistpump after suckin’ Elio’s cannoli. Get it together, man.

Plummer was good considering he’s like 90 (a true Old Man) and did all his shit in like a week in front of a green screen. You’d think him being a last-second replacement for Kevin Spacey would be distracting, but the movie’s so bad you don’t really care. Actually, we should go back and replace Spacey with Christopher Plummer in everything! Imagine Plummer bringing his elder statesman gravitas to American Beauty or Horrible Bosses.

Jenkins was great in The Shape of Water. Really good supporting character and friend to Elisa. The supporting cast in Shape of Water was generally awesome.

Supporting Actress: Mary J. Blige, “Mudbound” Allison Janney, “I, Tonya” Lesley Manville, “Phantom Thread” Laurie Metcalf, “Lady Bird” Octavia Spencer, “The Shape of Water”

Janney seems to be the frontrunner, though this seems like the only one of 4 categories where people think there may be an upset. Metcalf is so good in Lady Bird, varying from tough mom to loving mom.

Truly great range.

Janney got a lot of hype, and I ended up feeling underwhelmed by her performance. She disappears for a lot of the film after a showy start, and I ended up being much more into the performances of Robbie and Sebastian Stan.

Man, GTFOOHWTMFBS. She “disappears” for a lot of the film because the story goes elsewhere; it’s not like she’s turning in a half-forgettable performance. Plus, that criticism is meaningless when Queen Elizabeth can win one for like 8 minutes of screen time. Janney is great in this film, giving a performance that’s far from one-note, more nuanced than she’s getting credit for, and 100% real.

I preferred Manville’s role as the DDL’s sharp sister in Phantom Thread. She’s really good without ever being too showy.

This is the one nominee I won’t be mad at for beating Janney (well, her and Mary J, because how could I ever be mad at Mary J?). Manville crushes it as Woodcock’s sister and business manager. She delivers scathing insults with that Woodcockian gumption and provides some humanity in the face of DDL’s artistic vanity without falling into the Jekyll/Hyde dichotomy. She keeps it as real as Reynolds, but is just wired a bit differently.

Spencer is another key supporting role in The Shape of Water, and she’s another terrific friend to Elisa. I also enjoyed her calling out her husband - he needs to get his act together!

Yeah, dude has to turn in his sack after that FBI agent ran roughshod over his household.

Mary J is really solid in Mudbound, though I was much more into the roles of Jason Mitchell (Eazy-E!) and Garrett Hedlund, the main relationship of the film.

Original Screenplay: “The Big Sick,” Emily V. Gordon & Kumail Nanjiani “Get Out,” Jordan Peele “Lady Bird,” Greta Gerwig “The Shape of Water,” Guillermo del Toro, Vanessa Taylor “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri,” Martin McDonagh

It’s so cool to see The Big Sick get a nomination here. My main gripe about the movie is that it gets a little long. But it’s a really good adaptation of a real-life story, filled with funny scenes mixed with good emotion. Big Sick is such a lovely film. It’s got great performances too by Ray Romano and Holly Hunter. And the cultural stuff is really neat to see on-screen.

The Big Sick is the one movie I really regret not getting to. If only there was a way I could still watch it...

Get Out’s script is amazing. I hope it wins. It seems like it’s between it and Billboards, which definitely doesn’t deserve a win.

Get Out should get TWO wins here. One for Lil Rel’s dialogue and one for the rest of it. You aren’t getting this kind of quality anywhere else. A true original. If Three Billboards somehow wins this I’m gonna rent three billboards to talk about how shitty that movie is. “How Come Chief Paddington?”

I’m bummed Lady Bird seems like it won’t get any wins (fingers crossed on Metcalf), and it’s second here for me after Get Out. Shape of Water is great, but the script isn’t what gets me the most.

I don’t think I need to tell you what about The Shape of Water gets Matt the most.

Adapted Screenplay: “Call Me by Your Name,” James Ivory “The Disaster Artist,” Scott Neustadter & Michael H. Weber “Logan,” Scott Frank & James Mangold and Michael Green “Molly’s Game,” Aaron Sorkin “Mudbound,” Virgil Williams and Dee Rees

Shoutout to LOGAN! First major nod for a comic book movie I think. Awesome. It was a great sendoff for a famous pairing (Hugh Jackman and Patrick Stewart as Logan and Xavier). Here’s hoping we get some more nods next year for Black Panther (and hopefully if Infinity War is good).

LOGAN! We made it, fam! Logan was a great flick. So happy to see Wolverine finally done right on the big screen. If they’d have tightened up the post-X23 battle portion of the movie, I’d be clamoring for it to get a Best Picture nom.

Call Me by Your Name was really well-done. A cool tidbit is that Sufjan Stevens convinced the director to take out the narration from the book (though I guess that would be a knock on the screenplay, probably?).

After Matt hit me with some details from the Call Me by Your Name and I Will Call You by My Name book, I’m even more thankful to Sufjan. Really didn’t need to see these guys taking massive dumps in front of each other while the camera pans to Elio’s dad crying, with his shirt pulled over his nose.

Disaster Artist was a really fun movie about a really wacky story. It managed to get the right amount of comedy and emotion into it. From what I’ve read, Mudbound seems to have done some good work changing aspects of the book, including adding more viewpoints for the black family members. It’s still a bit shaky in the first half.

Molly’s Game was a mixed bag. Sorkin seemed to have his usual strengths and minuses… and the minuses were big. I don’t get why he shoehorns a father-child relationship into all of his scripts. This one was particularly unnecessary and detracted from the storyline.

I didn’t get to Disaster Artist or Molly’s Game. Sorkin’s scripts are more bloated than Bridge of Spies’ runtime.

Film Editing: “Baby Driver,” Jonathan Amos, Paul Machliss “Dunkirk,” Lee Smith “I, Tonya,” Tatiana S. Riegel “The Shape of Water,” Sidney Wolinsky “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri,” Jon Gregory

Baby Driver! That’s a cool nomination right there. The film’s weakest part is the story, so I’m all for any movie-making nominations it gets, and the editing was crisp.

Props to Baby Driver for being really cool and really dumb at the same time. That’s hard to do!

Dunkirk is the win for me here. A lot of the movie relies on the jumping around of timelines, and the movie really nails it there.

Does it though? There were three timelines/points of action, but Nolan did a slopfest of a job tying them together. Should’ve given Billy Walsh a truckload of fresh fruit and let him get a crack at the dailies.

Cinematography: “Blade Runner 2049,” Roger Deakins “Darkest Hour,” Bruno Delbonnel “Dunkirk,” Hoyte van Hoytema “Mudbound,” Rachel Morrison “The Shape of Water,” Dan Laustsen

Oh snap, that’s DEAKINS’ music. People think Deakins will finally win here after being nominated 14 times. Here’s some great footage of his best work. I still don’t completely understand cinematography, but it does seem like he lost a few times for movies that were more visual effects than cinematography (e.g. Life of Pi).

Deak tha Freak! Didn’t see Blade Runner 2049 because I’m not a nerd, but I got love for Deakins, so sure, give it up for him. Don’t even talk to me about Life of Pi. Fuck Pissing Patel and fuck you too!

As for this specific film, Blade Runner 2049 is beautiful, and he appears to have done some incredible work himself on the film (as opposed to other visual effects people). It looks amazing in some scenes, the lighting is great, and the world is fully-realized.

Shape of Water and Dunkirk are my next favorites. Both look really good.

Of the two I’ve seen, Dunkirk probably deserves this over The Shape of Water. Its visuals were the best thing it had going on. At least The Shape of Water has fish peen to fall back on.

Animated Feature: “The Boss Baby,” Tom McGrath, Ramsey Ann Naito “The Breadwinner,” Nora Twomey, Anthony Leo “Coco,” Lee Unkrich, Darla K. Anderson “Ferdinand,” Carlos Saldanha “Loving Vincent,” Dorota Kobiela, Hugh Welchman, Sean Bobbitt, Ivan Mactaggart, Hugh Welchman

BOSS BABY. But nah I’ve only seen Coco. Coco is so good. It reminds me of Inside Out for how mature and emotional it is. Its themes of family and death and memory are on point. It’s also really fun and colorful, AND it’s got awesome culture with Dia de Las Muertas.

Haven’t seen any of this shit. Maybe I’m racist, but Coco looks boring as hell. Just Moana but Mexican instead of Polynesian.

Also, how did The Lego Batman Movie not get ANY love? That was probably the third best Batman movie of all-time (Batman and Batman Begins being the top two)! I’m STILL mad at The Lego Movie not getting nominated for Best Animated Feature when it was a dark horse for Best Picture! The Lego Movie is the Michelle Kwan of animated movies.

Original Song: “Mighty River” from “Mudbound,” Mary J. Blige “Mystery of Love” from “Call Me by Your Name,” Sufjan Stevens “Remember Me” from “Coco,” Kristen Anderson-Lopez, Robert Lopez “Stand Up for Something” from “Marshall,” Diane Warren, Common “This Is Me” from “The Greatest Showman,” Benj Pasek, Justin Paul

SUFJANNNNNNNNNN. When I first wrote this, I was bummed because I thought he wasn’t performing. You can imagine my joy when it was announced that he WAS.

Can’t wait for Suf to walk onstage with a big butterfly outfit while a bunch of violinists run around him in heart-shaped outfits, while Chalamet and Hammer are biking around stage while eating gelato. Mystery of Love is amazing and very key to the movie (Visions of Gideon may be even better, but I’m cool with MoL getting the nod here).

Visions of Gideon IS better, though that’s not saying much. IS IT A VIDEO SUFJAN????????

Remember Me seems like the favorite, and it’s a really great song. I would be pretty happy with it getting the win. It’s cool that Gael Garcia Bernal is performing (unlike Gosling/Stone flaking last year for La La Land, smh).

Remember Me has the issue of trying to live up to the standard set by Z-Ro for songs titled “Remember Me.”

Original Score: “Dunkirk,” Hans Zimmer “Phantom Thread,” Jonny Greenwood “The Shape of Water,” Alexandre Desplat “Star Wars: The Last Jedi,” John Williams “Three Billboards Outside Ebbing, Missouri,” Carter Burwell

I need to re-listen to Last Jedi’s score, but it’s hard for me to say that it had anything unique compared to the previous Star Wars movies… just feels like a nod for Johnny W.

Not a big “score” guy, but let’s go ahead and crown Sicario 2 the winner in this category next year.

Shape of Water was really lovely. I also think it’d be cool to see Greenwood get a win (Radiohead whaaa). Dunkirk is super intense. Billboards...nah.

The Shape of Water was scored by a Radiohead guy? Makes sense because that fish was a CREEP.

Sound Editing: “Baby Driver,” Julian Slater “Blade Runner 2049,” Mark Mangini, Theo Green “Dunkirk,” Alex Gibson, Richard King “The Shape of Water,” Nathan Robitaille, Nelson Ferreira “Star Wars: The Last Jedi,” Ren Klyce, Matthew Wood

Sound Mixing: “Baby Driver,” Mary H. Ellis, Julian Slater, Tim Cavagin “Blade Runner 2049,” Mac Ruth, Ron Bartlett, Doug Hephill “Dunkirk,” Mark Weingarten, Gregg Landaker, Gary A. Rizzo “The Shape of Water,” Glen Gauthier, Christian Cooke, Brad Zoern “Star Wars: The Last Jedi,” Stuart Wilson, Ren Klyce, David Parker, Michael Semanick

Baby Driver’s sound was critical to it, as was Dunkirk’s. I have trouble understanding the two (here’s one of many explainers) but based on what I read, I’d want Baby Driver for Sound Mixing (Edgar Wright had the actors listening to the same song simultaneously, so they could imagine how it would play on screen… which is awesome) and Dunkirk for Sound Editing.

Can’t speak to the legitimacy of these nominees, but it’s a relief seeing the same five in both categories. Can you imagine the humiliation otherwise? “Oh this was MIXED really well, but the editing was TRASH.”

Visual Effects:

“Blade Runner 2049,” John Nelson, Paul Lambert, Richard R. Hoover, Gerd Nefzer “Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 2,” Christopher Townsend, Guy Williams, Jonathan Fawkner, Dan Sudick “Kong: Skull Island,” Stephen Rosenbaum, Jeff White, Scott Benza, Mike Meinardus “Star Wars: The Last Jedi,” Ben Morris, Mike Mulholland, Chris Corbould, Neal Scanlan “War for the Planet of the Apes,” Joe Letteri, Dan Lemmon, Daniel Barrett, Joel Whist

Matt didn’t offer any analysis here, so I can only assume he worked on the visual effects for Kong or whatever and it’s a conflict of interest.

Production Design: “Beauty and the Beast,” Sarah Greenwood; Katie Spencer “Blade Runner 2049,” Dennis Gassner, Alessandra Querzola “Darkest Hour,” Sarah Greenwood, Katie Spencer “Dunkirk,” Nathan Crowley, Gary Fettis “The Shape of Water,” Paul D. Austerberry, Jeffrey A. Melvin, Shane Vieau

The Shape of Water looks cool? So does Blade Runner. So I want one of those.

Was Beauty and the Beast the most unnecessary movie of 2017? Probably. Really stoked for the human version of Song of the South. I wanna know who designed the pies in The Shape of Water. Damn those shits were ugly.

Makeup and Hair: “Darkest Hour,” Kazuhiro Tsuji, David Malinowski, Lucy Sibbick “Victoria and Abdul,” Daniel Phillips and Lou Sheppard “Wonder,” Arjen Tuiten

I do think it’s random that this only has 3 nominees. That’s all I got. Oldman for Churchill, I imagine, should win.

Doesn’t this category usually only have 3 noms? If only I was typing this on a machine that would let me look up the answer. Folks better get these famous-people roles while they can; another 5 years and biopics will be 50% holographic.

Costume Design: “Beauty and the Beast,” Jacqueline Durran “Darkest Hour,” Jacqueline Durran “Phantom Thread,” Mark Bridges “The Shape of Water,” Luis Sequeira “Victoria and Abdul,” Consolata Boyle

Phantom Thread should win, right? Shape looks cool too. The outfits for the monster were wild.

Ayo, that fish was buck naked! They really just subbed in my man Abe Sapien. If Phantom Thread doesn’t win this...it’s like, Mark Bridges, what the hell are you even doing?

Best Documentary Feature: “Abacus: Small Enough to Jail,” Steve James, Mark Mitten, Julie Goldman “Faces Places,” JR, Agnès Varda, Rosalie Varda “Icarus,” Bryan Fogel, Dan Cogan “Last Men in Aleppo,” Feras Fayyad, Kareem Abeed, Soren Steen Jepersen “Strong Island,” Yance Ford, Joslyn Barnes

My friend Donna says Abacus is awesome, and it seems like a cool story. Jane didn’t get nominated here and that’s the only one I saw (good film).

Didn’t see any of these. I watch movies to ESCAPE from real life, not wallow in it.

Best Foreign Language Film: “A Fantastic Woman” (Chile) “The Insult” (Lebanon) “Loveless” (Russia) “On Body and Soul (Hungary) “The Square” (Sweden)

I have seen the trailer for Loveless, and it looked intense. Otherwise, I gotta get to these… it’s tough when they aren’t really available in theaters.

Matt, you gotta move out of BFE. Loveless and “L’Insult” been in theaters here. Not that I’ve seen them, whoops.

Animated Short: “Dear Basketball,” Glen Keane, Kobe Bryant “Garden Party,” Victor Caire, Gabriel Grapperon “Lou,” Dave Mullins, Dana Murray “Negative Space,” Max Porter, Ru Kuwahata “Revolting Rhymes,” Jakob Schuh, Jan Lachauer

KOBE

*ahem*

#KOBE

Best Documentary Short Subject: “Edith+Eddie,” Laura Checkoway, Thomas Lee Wright “Heaven is a Traffic Jam on the 405,” Frank Stiefel “Heroin(e),” Elaine McMillion Sheldon, Kerrin Sheldon “Knife Skills,” Thomas Lennon “Traffic Stop,” Kate Davis, David Heilbroner

Let me put my homie Matt on blast here. I told him I was going to check out a showing of these five shorts and he’s all like “Why? I’m not including them in the Oscar pool, loser.” I was STUNNED. I’m in it for the ART, meanwhile Matt only cares about nursing his gambling problem. Anyhow.

Traffic Stop is apparently the front-runner, but was probably the worst one. I’m totally on board with its message about cops being violent racists, but the situation here probably wasn’t the best one to exemplify that idea.

Edith+Eddie had some charming moments, but not much of a story. People treat old people like shit. Wow.

Heaven is a Traffic Jam on the 405 was the most poignant and touching of the five. The story of Mindy Alper, an artist who suffers from truly debilitating mental illness/depression, is both heartbreaking and uplifting. It’s amazing what she’s been able to accomplish while simultaneously waging a constant battle with herself.

Heroin(e) tells a gripping story of the heroin epidemic of Huntington, WV and what three strong women are doing to battle it. Nothing super-groundbreaking, but a very well-told story about a part of the country that often goes overlooked.

Knife Skills was my second-favorite behind Heaven is a Traffic Jam on the 405. At times hilarious, but always inspiring, we get a look at ex-cons getting a second chance by attending culinary school/working at an upscale French restaurant in Cleveland. The willingness to show some light-hearted moments made this doc feel a bit slighter than the other four, but that’s hardly a fair criticism. Great stuff, and it definitely left me wanting to see more. And hungry.

Best Live Action Short Film: “DeKalb Elementary,” Reed Van Dyk “The Eleven O’Clock,” Derin Seale, Josh Lawson “My Nephew Emmett,” Kevin Wilson, Jr. “The Silent Child,” Chris Overton, Rachel Shenton “Watu Wote/All of Us,” Katja Benrath, Tobias Rosen

DeKalb Elementary is about a local incident in Atlanta so I’ma be pulling for it.

That’s all I got.

#by Alex and Matt #movies #Oscars #Get Out #Lady Bird #The Shape of Water #Phantom Thread #Fuck You Billboards #NOLAN like LOST

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