#did i go a little overboard here even tho it's possible that no one else cares about this? perhaps >:) I've been known to do that

[smileyobrien]

Dad has a very old fashioned idea of what a successful career looks like, what a fulfilling life looks like. And it just so happens that it looks like you.

James Tiberius and George Samuel Kirk in STAR TREK: STRANGE NEW WORLDS (2022- )

+ bonus :'(

[naushtheaspiringauthor]

Hello, I wanted to send a request for your autumn writing event. I would like to request a Nikolai Lantsov imagine based on the song prompt 'how you get the girl'. The reader is female gender and the pronouns are she/her. Also if it's okay can the reader be a squaller 👉👈

Thank you😊

Win you over- Nikolai Lantsov x reader

A/N- I am SO sorry for writing this centuries later😭😭Lets just ignore how I'm doing a request for my AUTUMN writing event even tho its winter now. But I really hope u like it I worked really hard on this

Warnings- none

Summary- After Nikolai realizes he has attained feelings for a certain lady, he goes overboard to win her over

Nikolai had met all kinds of people throughout his life. Some despised him, others desired him, some wished to gain something from him, but all the time he could always figure out their intentions. However there was one about whom Nikolai couldn't figure out much of. You. 

It seemed as more as he got to know you, the more mysterious you'd seemed. 

But somehow, the more he got to know you, the more he grew closer to you. Until he finally realized he couldn't restrain his mind from wandering to you at all times, until you'd plagued all his thoughts, until he realized he'd fallen in love with you. 

And him being stubborn as always, decided to do anything to win over the girl who'd always appeared as a mystery to him. 

                 …..............................................................................

You, on the other hand, had quite similar feelings but an utterly different way of thinking. You'd began to grow closer to the sunshine boy when the threat of the Darkling had been looming over. You seemed to have grow fond of even the slightest sight of the boy. 

However, he had someone else on his mind. He'd been to indulged to win over the Sun Summoner's  heart to even glance your way. 

So you'd given up long ago. Lost any hope that he'd ever be willing to think of you the same way as he had for the girl, even long after she'd left. So you'd shut your heart and you focused on the life in front of you, you focused on your duties as the head of the Ravkan council. 

All until Nikolai had decided to go to any heights to win you over. 

             ................................................................…..........................

You'd been sitting in one of the quarters near the little palace that had been sitting idle for quite some time. You'd drop by sometimes whenever you wished to get your paperwork done with no one there to bother you, and today, there seemed to be a lot of it. 

It'd been raining intensely when u heard a sound resembling a knock.

You turned towards the door for a moment wondering if someone's outside, then went back to your work thinking no one would bother to come here at such a harsh weather even if they did know where you were. 

Then you heard it again, rapid knocks on the door. 

You got out of your chair and went to the door in a haste, wondering who was outside. 

Your eyes widened at the sight of the person in front of you. Drenched thoroughly from top to bottom, breathing intensively, stood the king of Ravka, Nikolai Lantsov. 

                                                        …....................................................................................................

The plan had been perfect, or so Nikolai had thought. He was to wait for the rain to begin and you to be away from the peering eyes of everyone when he would make his move. He intended to grab the kind of gift you'd love the most, Books.  Or more so, the one you'd been looking for since as long as he could remember. 

So he had set out, the package secured in his arms, the clear motive etched in his brain. But it was when he'd went halfway when he realized how intense the rain had been and had resulted in spoiling the gift and get himself all drenched. And by the time he was at the doorstep , he'd been shivering and had possibly attained a cold. 

“Nikolai!?” Your eyes widened at the sight of him. “What are you doing here in this rain!? “ your tone being equally surprised as your expression. 

Though being badly soaked from head to toe, the boy attempted to keep his composure, “I, came here to see you” he spoke with a nervous grin

His words really confirmed your suspicions of him being an idiot. You looked at him in awe before speaking in a rather stunned voice, “Are you insane!?” you said

“Well, only for you” the mad boy grinned. 

You opened your mouth to speak but closed it. Then suddenly grabbed his arm and rushed him inside, completely ignoring his statement. 

“Sit down” you ordered him as you rushed inside a room in the quarter.

You returned a few moments later with a clean towel to find that he had obliged you. 

“Here, there's a spare room you can use” you spoke, handing him the towel and gestured him to your left. 

“Really? I thought you'd like it better if I just did it over here” he gave a sly grin but quickly changed his expression when resulted in attaining a glare from you. 

After a while, he came out looking less miserable than he'd been and sat down next to you. 

“So why exactly did the king himself run all the way from the grand palace to here?” you asked

Tell her the truth, tell her the truth, tell her the truth, his mind screamed at him. But he just froze, as if he'd lost the ability to speak. 

“Uhhh- well- I needed some important documents from the little palace but it started raining so I thought to just come here” he managed

“Huh? So because it was raining, you chose to cross the whole palace and instead come here?“ you raised an eyebrow. 

Shit. He had been too occupied to practice what to say to you at the doorstep to even think of an excuse. 

“Yeah. Well it- I don't think it even matters anymore” he chuckled nervously

“Yeah” you slowly nodded in acknowledgement

“Anyways, how have you been? I barely see you anymore?” he changed the subject

“Nikolai, you saw me… yesterday “ you responded in confusion

“Yeah, yeah right” he chuckles nervously. “You know how weird time can be”.

You looked at him for a few moments before speaking again “Well um, I should get back  to my work or councilman Henrik is going to be up my nerves again” you sighed. 

“Yeah- yeah sure” he responded. 

He sighed as he looked at the rain through the window, pondering upon how miserably he'd failed today. But he wouldn't stop until he'd reached his goal. He Wasn't A Quitter After All, he thought, grinning to himself

                  …....................................................................................

These foolish little attempts won’t work if I really want to tell her how I feel, Nikolai thought to himself. If he wished to let out his feelings infront of you, if he really wished to tell you the truth,

he had to up his game.

You’d been out of the palace as you and David needed to test some of the weapons you’d been working on. So you’d chosen a cabin away from the population to be the most suitable place as there won't be dangers of anyone getting hurt here. 

Apparently someone else had the idea of moving his expedition to this place.

You had set up one of the you’ve made in the field to test whether it functioned properly. “Well, if it really works it should cover about 6,000 kilometres in about in, ten minutes” David spoke

“Let’s hope it does” you responded as you readied it to launch.

Just as you launched it into the air, you both noticed something in the sky. You looked at in confusion before you finally realized what it was, as it came closer towards you.

Your eyes widened at the sight infront of you, an improved version of Nikolai’s hummingbird…with him on it. He stood on the ship, not having any realization of the massive threat coming his way.

Before you could think anything, you rushed forward and brought both of your hands and sent a massive gust of wind towards the ship’s way. Until Nikolai realized what was happening, it had been too late as he was inches away from being blown to bits.

At the last moment, you thrust your arms forward and sent a gust of wind his way, making the ship violently thrash sideways and finally crashing to the ground.

David rushed towards the ship and helped Nikolai get out. 

Nikolai went towards you, grinning like an idiot. Even though his initial plan had failed, he was amused by how grand his entrance had been. He believed you to have a similar reaction to his little stunt, but the truth appeared to be on the contrary.

You stormed towards him with your fists clenched at your sides, your face flushed red

“So, how did you think of my little manoeuvre?” he asked, still grinning. 

“Have you gone mad!?” you practically yelled at him, your face brimming with anger

“I-” he was caught off-guard by your sudden tone, he’d never seen you this angry

“This place is supposed to be off limits to anyone! And you just waltz in here so willing to get yourself blown to bits!” your rage not deteriorating in the slightest. “You could’ve died!”

Nikolai’s expression transformed into one of immense regret once the realization of what could’ve just happened dawned on him. “I- I wanted to surprise you” he looked down at his feet, his face flushed with guilt

“Well you’ve surprised me enough by almost being killed by your own weapon” you spat.

He remained silent and couldn’t bring himself to meet your gaze as you left.

              ……………………...................................................................

It was proven now, either Nikolai has always been a massive idiot or he’d now turned into one. Had he lost his mind? He could’ve died today, and just because of his foolishness. Had he truly been that big of an idiot to just fly to a practically death zone? You thought to yourself as anger flooded your brain.

What if he…what if I weren’t able to save him on time? Panic filled in you, but now you were truly grateful that he was alive. You couldn’t bear to imagine your life without him in it. You couldn’t bear to live without him.

“I can’t believe he’d do something so idiotic!” you explained the whole incident to Zoya with immense exasperation.

However, she didn’t seem to have the kind of reaction you had anticipated. “Are you really that oblivious?” she sighed

“Wait, what?” you looked at her in confusion

“Can’t you see what he’s been attempting to do for weeks?” she continued, but seeing you still failed to understand, she explained further. “He’s trying to impress you . Have you not noticed his strange behaviour and foolish attempts to win you over?” she rolled her eyes.

A sudden thought struck your mind, Is this why he had been acting so strange for the past few weeks? You wondered. Him behaving strangely at the sight of you, his miserable attempts of striking a conversation with you, running to you all the way from his palace in the rain, and now this. 

Was he truly attempting to…win you over? Your eyes widened at the possibility

You had made a massive mistake, you were sure of it now. Even though Nikolai had managed to almost get himself killed, you had practically yelled at him. You’d broken the heart of the very boy who was going over the board to make you happy.

You had to fix this.

                       …………………………………….................................

You smiled at the sight of Nikolai sitting by himself in the garden. You knew you’d find him here, this is where he’d go when he’d be feeling unwell. More importantly, the place where you had your first proper conversation with him. 

“We can get the hummingbird fixed Nikolai, you shouldn’t feel so disconsolate” You spoke as you approached him

He turned sideways to look at you but then again dropped his gaze to his feet, “It’s not that I’m worried about” he spoke in a tone that truly displayed how heart broken he’d been.

 He then shifted to a side to allow you to sit beside him. “I’m sorry for doing all that, I realize how dangerous it was. But I- I just wanted to surprise you”.

You sighed as you looked at him, “I know Nikolai, I now realize you weren’t intending on getting yourself hurt. But you must know that you don’t need any grand gestures to surprise me, or make me happy. And what if you’d been hurt? How could I have lived without you?” you spoke in a soft voice.

“Really? You- you can’t live without me?” his gaze finally met yours

“Of course not you idiot” you grinned slightly. “Take this very moment for example, just sitting beside you in such a peaceful state is surprise enough for me” your tone grew sombre.

“It is?” he raised his eyebrows in curiosity

“Yeah. Now tell me, what’s been on your mind for so long?”

Nikolai seemed to hesitate before finally mustering up the courage to speak. “I- well the reason I’ve been acting so weird is, well because I’ve fallen in love with you. You’ve plagued my mind in such a way that none other ever had. The way you show affection not in words but your actions, how excited you can get when you get a new idea for something. And those eyes“ he gazed deepened.

“They’re-the way they gleam in the moonlight. They’re so- drownable in”.

His words touched your soul in a way none other had. It was like you’d fallen in love with him all over again.

“So I- I just wished to do something, anything that would make you find me endearing in the slightest” he continued

You were quite startled by his words. All this just to make me find him, endearing? 

You let out a light chickle, making him give you an utterly confused look. “Well, I believe that won't be a problem anymore” you gave him a sly grin

“What? why?” 

“Well, to your enormous luck, I already find you endearing enough, love” 

He looked at you in disbelief which was clearly displayed on his face. Did she really say that?? he thought. 

“Wait, wh- really?” he had a shocked expression plastered over his face

“Yes, I believe I do” you grinned

He continued to look at you with utter disbelief. He couldn't believe what you just said was true. He'd written a whole speech and all but he was panicking too much to think of a word. You'd rendered him speechless. 

“I-” he racked his brain to think of something but he just couldn't. He really did not wish for it to go like this, with him panicking too much to utter a word. 

But your expression remained stagnant. You gazed intensely in his hazel eyes before cupping both his cheeks with your hands and softly pressing your lips to his. 

Nikolai's eyes widened at your action, he'd been the luckiest man alive. 

You slowly pulled away from him. 

“I had a whole speech and all but I have to admit I do not remember a word” he spoke

You grinned at his words, “I have to admit it was quite entertaining, watching you fail so miserably without having a clue as to what exactly you were willing to do”

This time, his hands were on either sides of your face before he pulled you close and pressed his lips on yours. Loving every moment of it. 

Even though his plans hadn't exactly worked, he was immensely glad to be in this very moment. 

 And that, was how he managed to get the girl of his dreams. 

[astralibrary]

another year another silan portrait babey.... a few days late this time but we still ballin'

i've been very into manga cover design lately (studying them, making my own, etc) so it only felt right to incorporate that into this year's portrait, right? and go way overboard designing the entire front, back and spine including a blurb and barcodes and retail/publishing info, right?? and then go all in on making a matching japanese version with its own alternative blurb and barcode area bc u can't have one without the other, right?? obviously!!!!

like i said i've been really into manga design-

thoughts & details belooow

funnily enough this ended up being an actual portrait again after i did away with them in favor of illustrations in recent years, but ig it's fitting since this is the 10th one, right? (more on that later i wrote this out of order-) a callback to the first one all those years ago... the other reason it's a portrait is bc art has been fighting back lately and a full illustration probably would have been a lot; most importantly tho i just thought this composition would make for a cool dramatic manga cover heh heh

anyway bro the impossible happened i fully rendered flowers AND completed the portrait this year hello??? this has never happened since the v first year wait i just checked it happened in 2019 too this has not happened since 2019 wowie!!!! i put my whole ass into those flowers pls observe them (except the tall purple ones don't look too closely at those. look at the pansies they're my fave ♥️)

this year we have morning glories taking center stage, surrounded by pansies, forget-me-nots, some kind of nondescript purple perennial or perhaps lavender, and some kind of pink blossom (idk that one was just a space filler). don't ask abt the random petals on his mouth & collarbone uhh theres some kind of flowering tree growing just offscreen it's possible

anyway the morning glories are significant bc they represent sythra, silan's twin sister; in my mind her colors are blue & yellow and it seemed like such a good fit, so i'm officially adding it to the Flower Lore (there is no flower lore)

there is, however, Twin Lore; silan's eyes are brown and sythra's are blue, but when they're telepathically linked their left eyes exchange color (so silan's becomes blue & vice versa). the flowers here are meant to represent that, like sythra isn't here but at the same time silan carries her with him wherever he goes... smth like that

the plot described in the blurb is like, sort of what happens but i simplified things for the sake of a neat little fake manga blurb. nobody asked me to do this yet here we are. if i were being realistic abt it this would probs be like vol 2 BUT i made it the 10th volume bc this is?? the 10th silan portrait??? i did the first one in 2014?? hello??? time is fake (my hc is that it's a slice of life club manga about flower pressing for the first 9 volumes but it pivots hard in vol 10 bc the author got so sick of drawing flowers no i am not projecting-)

now regarding the japanese version: i tried my best*

*(if u or a loved one know japanese ur not allowed to make fun of me ok orz i used 姉妹 bc theres no way for silan & sythra to know who's the older twin & idk what u would do in that situation like do u just pick one & go w it or is there another hierarchy-neutral word for sister, 姉妹 is the best i can do w my limited knowledge and even then it probably just sounds like silan is having twin girls which like good for him but even so if i sound like a dork keep it to urself ok but actually do tell me if u know bc i would like to Learn ik this is probably the least of my worries when it comes to that entire paragraph but rn we are just going to focus on the issues i know about and pretend that everything else is fine as is ok thank u for ur time & have a lovely day ur a star ⭐️)

misc fun facts aka u learn how unhinged i was abt this:

the title is May 16th bc that's just what silan's story has always been called. luckily i have that up my sleeve or i'd have had to come up w smth out of my ass like The Silan Portrait or some shit

the author and publishing company are both called astralibrary yes that's me (it has a nice ring to it as a manga publisher name don't u think). i made up the logo on the spot it's my best work. especially the one in the bottom right of the japanese bar code area where i just typed the name and put a star next to it bc that makes it look professional somehow

i stole borrowed the barcodes from existing manga i have good pics of (bc i have an entire folder in my gallery dedicated to manga covers & jpn typography, unrelated); the english one is hanako-kun vol 4, and the japanese one is after the rain vol 10. i changed all the numerical codes tho (variations on the date 5/16 repeating)

i made up the english prices but i picked ¥640 specifically bc that's the price of the natsuyuu volumes i have in my manga covers folder, my only possible point of reference,

rated teen even tho in my mind it'd be targeted more towards young adults; it doesn't have anything in it that would warrant a mature rating but it does feel strange to categorize it in this way even knowing these ratings don't necessarily dictate the target audience

i thought about messing around w the design of the japanese version more to reflect some of the design sensibilities i've observed in japanese manga, like different placement of the text on the cover or a different spine entirely (since they tend to differ a lot between jpn and eng versions)- i even thought about trying to design an obi (long strip of paper that wraps all the way around the bottom portion of the book, usually has announcements & promotional stuff on it), but that is a whole ass project for another day i think this'll do just fine for now skdjlfkdg

and there u have it, thank u for reading my yearly essay abt drawing i did! sometimes u need to go aaaaaa about smth u drew and that's ok 👌

---

edit: oh yea i forgor i should write transcriptions of the blurbs here we go

ENGLISH

Alone with his thoughts? Not necessarily...

Silan has finally discovered the source of the mysterious voice in his head- the long lost twin sister he never knew he had...?! She calls herself Sythra and she has a serious grudge against him- but they need each other in order to uncover the hidden truths about their past.

Why didn't they know about each other? How were they separated? Why can they hear each other's thoughts?

And... What else don't they know?

-

JAPANESE

双子の姉妹がいる⁉︎

サイランは頭の中の声の衝撃的な正体を知るーーどうやら双子の姉妹がいるらしい⁉︎しかも、なぜか嫌われているようで…頑張れ、サイラン！

どういうわけか、この二人は謎に満ちた過去の答えを一緒に見つけるでしょう。

なぜお互いのことを知らなかったのか？どのようにして離れ離れになったのか？なぜお互いの考えを聞くことができるのか？そして…他に知らないことは…？

待望の第10巻がついに登場！

INTENDED TRANSLATION:

I have a twin sister?!

Silan learns the shocking identity of the voice inside his head- apparently he has a twin sister?! And what's more, for some reason she seems to hate him... Hang in there, Silan!

Somehow, these two will find the answers to their mysterious past together.

Why didn't they know about each other? How did they get separated? Why can they hear each other's thoughts?And...what else do they not know...?

The long-awaited 10th volume is finally here!

[zmayadw]

And the next one as promised :)

CALL OF THE RAVEN

PART 6

The day i got released form hospital finaly came. I was happy about it, taking a breath of fresh air will be a welcoming change after over three weeks in here. Some bruises wer still visable, and my head hurted from time to time, but other then that the doctor gave me a green light. And having too much free time makes your toughts wonder in wrong direction too much. Thinking about Jake was my daily routine, and i hoped once i get out other things will get me occupied. Jessy wanted me to stay with her, but i managed to persuade her that i'd be better of at the motel. She reluclantly agreed, but I argued that i would still be resting most of the time, and promised her we will see eachother every day, wich made her respect my decision a bit more. She called me that moring, telling Dan will come and drive me to the motel, because she was bussy planing a surprise for me. „Oh, Jessy, pleas dont go overboard, it is my first day out, i wont be up for much.“ I protested, but she quickly reasured me its nothing big. Knowing Jessy, i was sceptical about it, but she sounded so happy that i just agreed to whatever she had in plan. I was about done packing, when Doris came bringing me my dischrage papers. She gave them to me, embracing me in a tight hug „You be good now, hun. And remember what i told you before.“ She said, giving me one more of her winks. „Thank you, Doris.“ I replied, handig her a chocholate bombonier i asked Jessy to get me. „For everything.“ I hugged her once more. „No need to thank me, hun.“  „Ahh, Doris, im jelaous, i didnt get a hug from you when i was leaving the hospital.“ It was Dan, being dramatic again. I laughed, as Doris went for the door „Schmacks dont deserve hugs!“ she grinned at him, and left. „She likes me...she just wont admit it.“ Dan said, grining. „So,you ready to leave this shithole?“ „Definatly!“ i said, taking my discharge papers and putting them in my pack. Dan took it from me, and we left the room, taking the elevator down. Stepping outside was so refreshing, i stopped at the exit for a brief moment, wich made Dan turn „You allrigh there?“ „Im good, just appriciate being outside again.“ I smiled. We continued to the car. Dan opened the door for me, putted my stuff on the back seat, and we drove towards motel. I rolled the window down letting the cool morning air blow to my face and through my hair. The drive wouldnt last that long, and Dan informed me that Jessy booked the room for me already and took the rest of my stuff there, and my car also waiting for me at the motels parking. „Dan, whats Jessy planing for me today?“ i asked. „Oh, no,no, im keeping my mouth shut!“ he replied, but i groaned at him pleading „Please, Dan, at least give me a hint. I just got out of hospital, and to be honest, im not up for big fanfaras, but i dont want to dissapoint Jessy either. And lets be honest, its Jessy wer talking about here, nothing is small or meaningless with her.“ He laughed at that „Your right about that! Alright, ill tell you, but if she realize you knew something..“ „Dont worry, i can act being genuinely surprised with no problem.“ I asured him. „Well, its nothing much, rellay. We're taking you for dinner.“ he said. Ok, thats not so bad, i tought, i do have to eat. „And she invited the gang to Aurora this evening, to celebrate your release from hospital.“ Ugh, i hoped that wouldnt happen so soon, that i would at least have a day or so for me before seeing everyone. „Ah, crap, i guess it was bound to happen sooner or later.“ I said, adding „Later would be better, tho.“ „Dont worry, Maya, ill be there to rescue you, AGAIN.“ He grinned at me, and i grinned back „Good, because i just might need some rescuing, again.“

Dan left me at the motel, and i entered the small checkin office. The woman behind the counter was eldery, and she smiled at me „Good morning, miss, what can i do for you?“. „Morning'“ i replied, smiling back „I had a room booked for me by a friend, i guess you know her, Jessica Hawkins?“. She smiled more now „Ah, ofcourse, miss Cole i presume?“ i nooded in agreement. „Yes, Jessica brought all your belongings already. I would just ask for you to fill this, please.“ She handed me that check in paper you get at every motel. I filled it, and she gave me the key.“You're at room 11, its on your right once you leave the office. And i'm Ms. Walter, fell free to ask if you need anything.“ „Thanks, i will.“ I replied, taking the key.

The room looked cozy enough. It had a big bed, with a little nightstand next to it with a lamp on it. There was a midium size table in front of a big window, wich i immidiatly felt greatefull for, since some natural light is what i prefere for my drawing work, and a closet next to it. Across from the bed was a  TV, and a little refrigeratore under it. The bathroom was small, wich is more then enough. I left my stuff on the bed, when i noticed a note on the nightstand. 'The car key is in the nightstand drawer. Get some rest, and see you later! Xoxo' It was from Jessy, and that made me smile. I took the key and went to the car to get the rest of my stuff. The day was nice and sunny, and i tought i souldnt spend the whole day in the motel. I went back to the room, unpacked, grabed some clean clothes and went for a shower. When i got dressed i sat at te table and turned my laptop on. I checked my mails, and some job offers. Its good when you're a freelancer, you can work from anywhere, and I actually felt some work might keep me occupied and not let my mind wonder to Jake.  The tought of him leaving my hospital room  two weeks ago still pained me, but i cant sit here and despair all the time, so i decided to grab my drawing stuff and head exploring. I hoped Jessy wouldt mind me going to town alone, she did promise me a grand tour of it once im out of the hospital. I took my phone and texted her „Hey hey, setteled at the motel. Going for a walk arround, but dont worry, im still looking forward for my tour arround Duskwood with you! xoxo“. She replied soon „Oh, nice, have fun! Just stay out of woods! xD See you for dinner J „. Great, now i could leave without feeling any guilt. I grabbed my backpack and left the motel.

I decidet to walk towards the marketplace, i had plenty of time since it wasnt even noon yet, and Jessy and Dan wont pick me up before 19. I passed a small bakery on my way there, and bought me some food and a bottle of water. The streets leading towards marketplace wer small and narrow, mostly with older buildings and pretty quiet. After some 30-40 minutes of slow walk,  i emerged to the marketplace, and it was comepletly different. The crowd thickened, and the place hummed with life. In the center was a nice funtain, with benches in circle arround it. Few wer occupied with people: one had an eldery couple, just sitting there on the sun and talking, on the other wer two mothers, drinking coffee while kids wer running arround, giggling and enjoying a nice day. I sat on one of the free benches, and took my drawing pad out. The warmth of the sun felt nice, and i began drawing. I can get quite zoomed out of my surroundings when drawing, so when i finaly noticed someone was standing in front of me, i jumped, and my penciles flew all over the floor. I started to stan up from the bench, at the same time that someone started to bend down to help pick them up,our heads coliding. That sent me sitting back on the banch, as both of us groaned from the impact. „Auch.“ I flinched, looking at the person stnding there. It was Jake. „Sorry, i didnt mean to sneak up on you.“ he said, still rubbing his forehead. „No, no, its fine, i was really focused, i didnt see you there.“ I barely managed to say, my voice shakey, clumsely picking my penciles from the floor.He was the last person i expected to run into. I really wasnt ready for this, the knot in my stomach starting to form, as i finaly collected all the penciles and sat back on the bench. I knew we wer gonna run at each other eventualy, but not so soon. He sat next to me, and i could notice by his body language he was a bit nervouse, too. „You look better.“ he said after a moment of silence, giving me a small smile, wich made my heart skip from joy. „Thanks, i feel much better,too.“ I replied, smiling back. He was looking at me so tenderly, and the heat from the sun made me so hot, i had a feeling my cheeks wer red as a lobster. He run his hand through his hair, and all i could think is how much i wanna do that. His look became more serious now, his eyes becoming darker, but that tenderness was still present. „Maya..“ he started „That day at the hospital.. I didnt..I'm sorry..“ but i interupted him. „No need to appologise, Jake, really.“ And he really didnt have to. I continued, before he could say anything else. „Look, its like this: you had every right to act like you did, and even tho it wasnt easy for me to hear you say those stuff, you wer right, in a way.“ He looked me a bit confused. „You wer probably right, I didnt think quite hard about every possible thing that could go wrong, and God knows i had more luck then im willing to admit. But thats just who i am: i act, i go with the flow, i make mistakes. And i appologise when I realize I was wrong, wich I would do to you if you just stayed for a while more. And i mean appologise for not telling you, or anyone about my plan, not for what i did at the end, hence me saying that you wer right in a way.“ I looked at him, he was still calm, not a trace of that anger i saw at the hospital anywhere on his face. That made me relax a bit. „Maya, just let me...“ he started again, but i interputed him once more „Please, Jake, just let me finish, then you can say whatever you wnat.“ He nodded in agreement. „ I know saying 'sorry' at that time seemed so pointless, but you have to know that i really am sorry, Jake, a thousand times sorry. Yet, i still stand by what i said, i would do it all over again, no matter the qonsequences.“ I paused for a moment, before i continued „I really hope you can forgive me. I got so used at having you in my life, and for it to end here and now...“ He looked at me, but i couldnt bring myself to look back at him. I just stared at my hands, not realizing this whole time i was clasping them so tightly. „I hope you wont shut me out of your life comepletly.“ We sat there in silence for what seemed like eternity. I got my courage and looked at him. He was staring in the distance now. „I felt helpless.“ he said, looking back at me now. „It got me...scared.“ he confessed, and i ached to just hug him. I could see this was being hard for him, saying it. „I've had that happen once before in my life, and it didnt end well.“ His eyes became so sad. „I'm not sure im ready to go through it again.“ That knot at my stomach tightened as he said it, but i took a deep breath „I understand. I'v let you down, i know. But i hope with time, you will be able to trust me again..let me be your friend, at least.“ Friend...that word felt so wrong to me. I didnt want to be just his 'friend', i wanted to be more, so much more. But, i guess at the moment i would be happy with anything. He stared at me for a moment, and before he said it, a smile formed at the corner of his lips „One step at the time.“ „Thats all im asking.“ I said, smiling shyly. He sat there in silence for a brief moment before slowely getting up. „You're good, by the way.“ He said, and i looked at him puzzeled, wich made him smile. He had such a sincere and wonderfull smile. „Your drawing, its good.“ He continued, pointing at my drawing pad. „Oh, that, thanks!“ i replied. „I better be good, i doubt i'll get paid otherwise .“ i grinned. He shook his head at me smiling, walking slowely away from the bench „See you arround, Maya.“ „See you, Jake.“ Watching him walk away this time didnt leave me in pain and agony. I felt hope again. Maybe Doris and Jessy weren't talking nonsence, afterall, I tought, not realising i was grinning like crazy.

After Jake left, i just sat there, letting my heart stop beating insanely. I was really happy for how our unexpected meeting went, i tought there really was some hope for us again. Oh man, Jessy will go crazy when i tell her all about it, she will so rub me her ' i told you so's' in the face! That got me laughing out loud, a few passerbys looking at me like i was crazy. And they wer right, i was crazy! Crazy for Jake. Everything about him drow me crazy: his gorgeous eyes, that ruffeled hair, and that beautifull smile. He shoud definatly smile more, i tought, his whole face smiles when he does it. The churchbell chimmed five , and i cursed under my breath. I better head back to the motel, i need another shower for sure. I quickly grabbed my stuff from the bench, deciding to grab coffee before headiding back. My toughts wer still running wild about Jake as i was walking back towards motel, i colided with a man. I almost dropped my coffe, quickly appologizing. „Be carefull there, miss, you never know who you might bump into.“  He said, a bit grim, like he was makeing a threath. I looked at him a bit astonished „Uhm, i will mister, thanks for your advice. And, sorry again!“ I slowly turned and continued my way. Strange guy i tought, but didnt pay any more toughts about it continuing back to the motel.

[beecherdrysdale]

Hello my bbs, hope everyone’s ok!.

The amounts of screenshots I took for this....

To start: haha I guess brigid and Dylan are in the same car together, but who’s at the front? Like Dylan better keep his hands to himself of Jamie’s gonna get jealoussssss. And it’s gonna be chaotic and quinton is gonna jump out of the car lol. Unless you put quinton upfront with you? Haha yes you ignore them and just talking to quinton hehe.

Brigid I do that as well, so get ready to lose when the light turns green! Kesh also likes to drive fast so it’ll be chaoticcccc.I am banishing Ryan to the back because I would definitely lose concentration. Quinner or Braden are the only ones that can sit upfront. Preferably Quinner so that I can hold his hand🥺 but I love you too braden. There is so much to see while driving in Canada, so frequent stops will be made. Plus the boys love Canada #nostalgic.

Lmao being in the car together would be so fun!!. Haha Dylan and Jamie braiding your hair would be hilarious, like they get into the biggest knot, why do I feel like Ryan would take a picture of it and post it on his insta story and would write “nice”😂 I do wanna see it tho. but like kesh said they would be giving you puppy eyes because they don’t want you to be mad at them, I’m not sure how you would react tho?. Hehe me pulling over, and quinton and devon just redoing your hair, and then I’d make them do my hair as well:). Ok so driving with the windows down and blasting music is good with everyone, I think we would playing all music lol , country for Brigid and Kirby? I think you like country? I’m playing 2000’s music- like a g6 would be so fun to blast in the car. Everyone is just dancing in the car. Some rap will be played for the boys. Kesh what music do you like? Does anyone else have any music suggestions? Haha cozzy, Devon and Braden just being passed out for the drive and literally not waking up to the music. Late night drives are adorable, esp with the make outs hehe.

Ok so we have decided that kesh is the most responsible on the trip which I totally agree with, somebody’s gotta keep us in check. Cozzy is apparently still sleeping, boy must be tired from all those nhl games hehe. Lmao sending Kirby with us, and you yeeling at Dylan not to buy a tv😂. We would so chaotic in the grocery store, like riding in the shopping cart, but also everybody’s racing to get their food, which would be majority of junk food hehe. Honestly we would buy so much food we are literally on a vacay with hockey players who eat a lot haha. The cash register would be shocked. Awww kesh, you being like “kirbs I didn’t even give you that many directions” but him being totally clueless and just trying to kiss you. him being “hmmmm but we didn’t get a tv, and we got some carrots and veggies” lmao I love that kesh please keep writing those.

Haha you got it right, I would be so confused, like how did we get so much food ?! Brigid, you did go overboard but I love it and we will eat our candy :) Dylan bring a ps5 is the funniest shit ever. Food discussion: yes to all of those candies, all dressed ruffles are delish so imma throw in a few bags. Dark chocolate is a must, hehe we should buy fruit and veggies. I don’t think I last that long with junk food hehe. Oo yess we are go a get an Nanaimo bars and poutine :) ooo and BEAVER TAILS . Those are sooo good. I can buy for everybody, esp quinner so that we can recreated that gif of him eating one.

Haha yes, Ryan and I will be there with the non stop chirps. We love them, but still you and Dylan getting 🥵 is 🤌. Hehe yes I mean Dylan h is gorg as well so quinner better work quick lol. Ooo brigid is feeling up some muscles, we love that. But also yes to the straddling and being soft w Jamie. Kesh they are a blushing mess, because they wanna be with Brigid all the time. We are absolutely recreating those wakeboarding lake pics, we have to witness that again- esp you brigid w Dylannnnn. We love some sunscreen and aloe vera.

Thank you, boats are fun! Yess Brigid is sharing the tube with Dylan and Jamie or just making the boys jealous 😏 and me or Ryan would probably make you intentionally fall off the tube lol. Maybe I can get quinner to go with me. Ryan is just waiting for that moment for Quinner to leave to push me in but I would be to quick and grab him as well 😂. Haha brigid needs a break and is just watching us lol. Haha Braden and Ryan pulling pranks on dyl and Jamie we love that. Aww kesh Quinner is being protective and wants to be with me.oh yes, Jamie and dyl staring at Brigid cuz she’s gorgeous in her bikini. We all look hot tho. Kesh is just chilling w kirbs. Lmao “I feel like we should stop Dylan and Jamie before they hurt themselves” and then kirbs being like “Devon is with them, there goes Dylan and Jamie” I love these.

Awww Quinner following me around 🥺 we’d be cute drunks. Ooo yes, Dylan and Jamie getting jealous, but they wanna be constantly around you, so I understand. Clubbing is a success, we are all pumped up w alcohol hehe. Lmao Devon and cozzy trying to get a girl but Ryan and Braden keep foiling their plans 😂 hehe kesh just chilling and wanting to help dev and cozzy but Kirby is to busy watching quinner, also question who is he doing the body shot on?

Yess the locked room would be not a Lexi and Ryan chaos, aw yes I get to know Dylan better:)) I wanna be friends! He he yes he would start getting jealous but then maybe I’d help him get your attention, but we still gotta let you have your Jamie moments🥺

Awww we do love a body positive Queen, y’all are gorgeous !! Haha yes we need a girls day! Some good shopping will be happening, we gotta get Brigid some summery clothes. The guys would be in awe, esp Jamie Dylan and kirbyyyy !!. I do wanna steal their clothes tho. We got so handsy boys over here!. Aww kesh you would looks so cute in kirbs big shirt but also in a bikini.

Yesss Dylan and Jamie are in awe, like she’s gorgeous. Same with Kirby m.

Aww kesh you’re to nice😭 you made me cry. Me abs Quinner!

Ok imma add more gtg to practice

Xo Lexi

okkkk so i’m finally home from school and practice now so i’m ready to respond. i’m taking notes from kesh and adding a keep reading bc this is gonna be longgggg so be warned to anyone reading this

haha yes i’m keeping quinton up front with me bc i don’t want him to jump out of the car lmao. i’m not going to subject him to the possible sexual tension that would be going on in the car if dyl or jamie were in the front. like if one of them were in the front they would just start touching my thigh or something knowing the other one could see it but couldn’t do anything about it. and then i would get distracted from driving and we wouldn’t win lol. so i’m making jamie and dyl sit in the back so they mostly dyl can just yell at me to drive faster so that we win. and then i’ll just chill and talk to quinton bc i want to annoy the other two lol

haha don’t worry, me and dyl (and jamie and quinton) will dominate once again. like you guys might drive fast, but i can guarantee i drive faster. especially if dyl is yelling at me to go faster lol. haha but yes you’ll definitely have a better chance if you banish ryan to the back so he can’t distract you. so you let quinner sit in the front with you and hold your hand 🥺 but as soon as he tries to put it anywhere else you banish him to the back so you don’t get distracted lol. but we would definitely have to make a bunch of stops for the boys bc they’re back in canada

haha yes dyl and jamie try, they really do, but they can not seem to get the whole braiding thing down. and then it ends up in a huge knot and ofc ryan just laughs at my misfortune and takes pics of my hair to post on his story. haha and i’d pretend to be soooo mad at them, and i can be scary when i’m mad so they’d be freaking out and just giving me puppy eyes and being like i’m sorry i’ll make it up to you. but then eventually i can’t keep up the act anymore and just start dying of laughter and then they would be annoyed bc they were freaking out lol. but then we have to stop so that our hair can be fixed.

yesss i love driving with the windows down absolutely blasting music and then whenever you drive past someone they just turn and look at you lol. i’m really into rap and i feel like a lot of the guys are too, so we have to have a lot of rap lol. and then country for kirby and i like country too, so i’m down with that. and then for lexi we have early 2000s music, which i also like and i feel like the guys would be down with that judging by the fact that they played it in the locker room at wjc lol. kesh any other music suggestions? and somehow even tho the music blasting cozzy, devon, and braden are just out, like nothing is waking them up. omg yes late night drives are so cute 🥰 esp with a make out sesh lol

haha yes, kesh is definitely the most responsible one, bc most of the rest of us just have sm crackhead energy it’s unbelievable. somehow cozzy is still sleeping, like how? idk, but then he’s not coming with and neither is kesh so she sends kirby as the responsible one, and let’s just say that doesn’t end too well. haha us getting a million things, and then i, for once being somewhat responsible, say no we’re not buying a tv or a ps5, that’s so expensive. and they’re just like, but babe we have our nhl salaries, we can pay for it, so then i give in lmao. and everyone in the store would just be judging us bc we would be so chaotic and be running all over the store lol. and riding in the cart too lmao. and then we also have a shit ton of food and the cashier is just like wtf, but yk it’s fine. like we would have sm candy and chips, and then we would also get poutine and nanaimo bars and beaver tails. omg i want to try beaver tails soooo bad they sound so good. and then we can recreate the quinner gif lmao. but then we also have to have at least a little healthy food so we feel better about ourselves since we’re all athletes who are supposed to be following diets lmao

haha yes you and ryan would be chirping everyone for literally everything. but mostly me with dylan and jamie lmao. like literally anytime i even touch one of them you guys are all over us, and i’m just like whatever, but the guys are blushing sooo hard lol. but then since i don’t care i keep doing whatever, so like putting sunscreen/aloe vera on them and i’m straddling them, and ik we’re gonna get chirped, but i just don’t care

haha yes boats are so fun, but us on a boat = chaos. hehe all of us on our tubes, but then we’re all trying to flip each other over. and then when we’re finally being slightly calm on the boat and just sitting on the railing, ryan has to come and push lexi in, and then she pulls him in with her and it’s just chaos again. and then i’d be sitting there laughing my ass off, and then someone else decides to push me in lmao. and we’re all looking hot in our bikinis obviously so our boys are all trying to get our attention the whole time. lmao and then kesh is just chilling with kirby and trying to be the voice of reason to get jamie and dyl to stop trying to show off and then kirby’s like no they’ll be fine. they are not fine

hehe yes lexi and quinner being the cutest drunks, just being super soft with each other and clingy 🥺 but then also kind of wild bc apparently quinner is doing body shots off of you. which also i really want to do. like i don’t care if it’s jamie or dyl, but please can one of them do body shots off me? and then let’s say dyl does it first, then jamie sees him doing it and ofc he’s jealous so then jamie has to do one too. and then kesh is chilling with kirby and she’s like hey you should go be a wingman for devon and cozzy, make ryan and braden leave them alone. but kirby’s too busy watching the rest of us do body shots lmao

yes lexi finally gets to actually have an extended convo with dylan, when they’re not trying to annoy everyone who’s actually trying ofc. but then you notice him getting jealous of me with jamie, so you chirp him at first but then he’s getting really annoyed. so then you have to be like calm down, let them have their moment, you’ve have plenty lol. she likes both of you, you know

haha yes we def need a girls day where we’re not being chaotic for once lol. and then we get a lot of cute clothes and stuff. and then when we get back the guys make us model all of it for them lol. and all of them are in awe. like kirby and quinner are just like 😍😍 about you guys bc they think you’re so cute. but then also they love our clubbing clothes and are getting super handsy when we go lol. but then after clubbing we just steal their clothes and live in them for most of the rest of the vacation and they pretend to be annoyed, but they secretly don’t mind bc they think it’s hot when we wear their clothes, esp if it has their name

overall, yes i love all of this and both of you 💖 sorry it took so long lol

[the-evil-authoress]

GX Month Day 1: “Game on!”

It’s Judai/Jaden Yuki’s birthday today! Let’s celebrate!

Precious fluffy boi!

Cross posted on Ao3!

Jaden doesn’t do birthdays.

He has maybe one or two memories of cake and candles and his parents’ faces, a couple more surrounded by friends and presents. After that it’s just a card and present or two left on the dining room table of an empty house.

Christina tries at least. She drags him out of the empty house and over to her place. There’s cake and candles and presents that actually match his interests and off key singing. Her mother cooks his favorite dishes. They duel.

It’s bittersweet, but it’s better than hiding under his blanket with his GameBoy all day.

*

/I’m heading to Yugi’s today. You should come too!/

Biting his lip, Jaden glances at the calendar and wonders if he’s gotten the days mixed up again. But, no, the home screen of the Duel Academy issued PDA proudly proclaims August 31. He looks back at Christina’s message. They hadn’t made any plans which isn’t unusual - Christina usually just shows up to drag him off, so that’s the weird part of this situation.

This is the first time they’ve both had cell phones tho.

He stares at the message, rubbing his thumb against the side of the device, until Winged Kuriboh trills at him to respond instead of sitting here angsting about it.

“Okay, okay- I am not!” Jaden protests.

Winged Kuriboh snorts.

Groaning, Jaden sends his reply.

/maybe/

/3 o’clock! Bring an overnight bag!/

“Are you even listening to me?” Jaden grumbles, but he has to admit to curiosity. This will hardly be his first time at Christina’s cousin’s house, but sleepovers had gotten rarer over the years.

“Oh, fine!” Jaden huffs as Winged Kuriboh headbutts him, tossing off the sheet he’d wrapped himself in to actually get dressed. It’s a little after 1 so he might as well get his stuff and leave now. The train to Domino alone will take an hour.

Ugh. He forgot how much he hated riding this thing alone.

*

The lights in the game shop out front are off, the door locked, so Jaden goes around to the side door and knocks. Muto-san lets him in.

“Judai! Glad you could make it.” The woman smiles warmly as Jaden toes his shoes off. “Christina’s in the living room.”

“Kay.” It’s a fairly mundane exchange. The few times Christina has dragged him over here on this day in the past, the woman nearly squeezed the daylights out of him. It felt like he might break, but he also felt really safe. He’s still confused by the memory but it’s a good one.

Did everyone forget? That’s not possibly, right?

Winged Kuriboh chirps at him again when he stalls too long in the genkan, and Jaden tries not to look like he jumps at nothing but air. “Alright!” he hisses out the side of his mouth and stalks down the short hallway.

Great. He’s in a bad mood now, and he hates dealing with people when he’s in a bad mood. Christina’s okay, but Yugi and Gramps have only seen his sunny side. Why is it so exhausting to be happy all the time?

“SURPRISE!”

Jaden shrieks as he rounds the corner to an explosion of bright colors and popping noises. It takes him what feels like an eternity to realize he’s just been assaulted with confetti by his friends who definitely don’t live in Domino.

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY, JADEN!” they chorus, every single one of them and what the actual fuck how??

“What?” He blinks dumbly at them, confetti dangling in his face and too stunned to even tell a giggling Winged Kuriboh to shut up.

“We came all this way to surprise you!” Alexis beams. Huh, she looks pretty good out of uniform; the kapris are definitely more practical than those stupid skirts.

“It was Christina’s idea!” Syrus declares, the redhead in question practically vibrating where she stands like she’ll explode into confetti herself any moment. It’s been a long time since he’s seen her that excited. “I was so nervous on the train I nearly missed my stop! But it was worth it!”

“Ha! My brother’s got you beat there. This idiot tried to board the wrong train,” Alexis scoffs, slapping the back of her hand against Atticus’s arm.

“Heeey!” the older boy whines, pouting dramatically. “It was an honest mistake!”

“Well, whatever mishaps on the way, we all got here,” Bastion interrupts, standing proud and tall as always, and Jaden might be a tiny bit delusional but he could swear Bastion looks proud of him. “And I can’t think of anywhere I’d rather be. You’re one year older. Congratulations, chap!” Bastion claps him on the shoulder and Jaden’s eyes don’t deceive him; the smartest kid in his grade, if not the whole school, is proud of him for simply turning 16!

Since when are birthdays an accomplishment to be proud of?!

Oh, right, this is the part where Jaden is supposed to smile, not stare at his friends like a dead fish. “R-right!” Did his voice just crack? His face feels creaky and numb. Oh god, is doing the serial killer smile?

“Who wants cake?” a boisterous voice calls, saving Jaden from falling further into panicked thoughts as its owner sweeps out of the kitchen holding a massive cake.

“Chumley?!”

“Yeah, duh! I wouldn’t miss your birthday for the world!” the newly hired card designer declares. “And I got a leave of absence, don’t worry! Apparently Mr. Pegasus is pretty big on the whole family and friends thing.”

Jaden can only gape. Then he notices Chazz lurking behind Chumley, his trademark scowl and dark clothing at total odds with the lopsided, brightly colored party hat someone else must have forced onto his head, and Jaden just loses it. The hysterical giggles bubble up his throat and he’s wheezing before he even understands what’s going on. But he’s...happy? No way, this has gotta be more than just ‘happy’. Jaden doesn’t think he’s felt so much in years!

“C’mere you guys!” He throws himself at them, instigating a group hug as Syrus squeaks and rushes to catch him. He hides the tears in Atticus’ shoulder and laughs instead of sobs. Christina’s hands finds his and he squeezes.

He has to swallow the ache in his throat again, when he sees the mountain of presents on the table.

“We may have gone a bit overboard.” Atticus laughs sheepishly.

“Dad’s gonna murder you when he sees the credit card balance,” Alexis grumbles.

“Oh, posh! Nothing is too big a sacrifice for Jaden’s big day!”

Jaden doesn’t even know what he’s gonna do with all this stuff! They end up building the model Gundam kits together. Jaden’s never had so much fun with those things.

He also gets that soul squeezing hug from Mama Muto.

“Thanks,” he whispers later, sitting on the couch with Christina while their friends argue over a puzzle strewn across the table.

“It wasn’t entirely my idea,” she hums, thumb rubbing his knuckle in a familiar, soothing rhythm. “Syrus wanted to know when your birthday was and pouted when he realized it’d be during summer break. When I told him you weren’t really fond of your birthday anyway, I guess he told Atticus and, well... Atticus got it in his head to throw you the ‘best birthday ever’. Mom doesn’t have enough space for a big party so I asked Yugi if Gramps and Aunty would mind. And here we are.” She smiles at him, so genuine and pure.

His throat aches again. He ignores it.

“Yeah. Best birthday ever.”

[darkpoisonouslove]

I’m just going to pick a few randomly because I can’t decide 5,27,31

You can always send in more if you want! I love doing these even if it takes me some time to figure them out so, please, feel free to send more! And that refers to everyone.

5 – broken

I went a little overboard with this one but can you blame me? It’s a no magic AU in which Valtor and Griffin are newlyweds. I couldn’t resist. (There’s still angst, tho.)

Griffin looked at the broken glass on the floor before turning to Valtor who had just come back with their suitcases and was leaving them next to the couch.

He stopped when he noticed the look she was giving him. “What’s wrong?” he asked, apparently already over the incident that was all his doing.

“Is this,” she looked back to the glass shards on the floor, “really the way we had to start our life in our new home?” They hadn’t even moved in yet and she already needed to break out the cleaning supplies and call someone to fix the broken window. It wasn’t exactly the way she’d imagined their married life would start. Not that she’d imagined anything when it came to that. Certainly not him carrying her over the threshold as it was done in old traditions.

“I’m sorry,” Valtor said, making her sigh. “I should’ve given you the key.” She should’ve taken it herself. Or maybe just made him wear it on his neck to make sure he wouldn’t lose it. But to be fair–to both of them–he didn’t usually lose things. Or at least the things he valued. Which was exactly what was bothering her.

She took a deep breath. “Just go call the locksmith, and I’ll clean this up,” she said, turning to go find the closet. She vaguely remembered where it was supposed to be from their tour of the house but after that Valtor had been tasked with taking care of their new home while she’d been organizing the wedding. He’d assured her that everything had been moved in successfully and the house only needed the two of them to move in. And somewhere around that time he’d lost the damn key which had led to a broken window since they had no spare. And it would take some time to get a new one without the original.

“Griffin,” Valtor caught her hand, halting her progress. “I’ll make it up to you, I promise,” his eyes found hers and the soft blue was like an ocean that would evaporate without her forgiveness. “I know we started off on the wrong foot but I’ll make sure that things will run smoothly from now on. You know I’m not a liar.” Whenever he’d say that, she’d inevitably believe him, for he’d never given her a reason to doubt him.

She nodded and smiled at him, her worries more or less put to rest, before she leaned in to kiss him.

He pulled her closer, pressing against her as his hand made its way into her hair while he ravished her mouth. She wasn’t sure when was the last time he’d kissed her like that. Not that he ever lacked passion, but this was something else entirely. And she remembered now that it was at times when he was afraid that he held her so close that it felt like he was trying to make her a part of him. Afraid of losing her. He’d read the thoughts in her mind even though she’d been careful to go around them from as far as possible for the sake of both of them.

She wanted to say something to reassure him but she had no air left and he was faster.

“Why don’t you go upstairs to change while I take care of the broken glass and the locksmith?” he suggested and she had to agree that that sounded heavenly. They’d just come back from their honeymoon–a thirteen hour flight–and she could use a change of clothes and maybe even a shower. “And maybe we’ll have time to… explore the bedroom before we get company,” he said against her lips, making her breath hitch.

“We did a lot of exploring on our honeymoon.” Not that she had any objections. But she’d really been looking forward to seeing some more culture and they’d ended up not leaving their hotel room for two whole days. And room service meant that they didn’t even have to go out for food.

“Not of this bedroom, though,” Valtor pointed out, making her chuckle. “What do you say?” he asked as he touched his forehead to hers.

Griffin laughed as she pulled away from him and headed for the stairs. “Maybe,” she said as she looked back at him. “You know where to find me.” She started climbing the stairs. Maybe broken did bring good luck after all.

We’ll need a cut because this got too long:

27 – boxes

An idea inspired by that set of headcanons I wrote about Griffin, Ediltrude and Zarathustra.

Griffin almost fell to the floor–her magic was the only thing that stopped that from happening–when she tripped over a box that was left right in the way when you walked into the room. She barely managed to hold onto the pot she was holding which made her see red already. The plant would’ve been doomed if she’d dropped it.

“Careful!” one of the twins reprimanded. She wasn’t quite sure which one it was yet. They were both equally annoying and she cursed Faragonda for the millionth time for turning out to be a fairy and starting a chain reaction that had left her having to room with the two sisters.

“Unless you want to turn yourself into a toad,” the black-haired witch spoke before her lips got pulled into a vicious smile since the thought apparently entertained her.

“What’s with all the boxes?” she asked, making sure to sound extra exasperated just to irritate them both as she left the pot with the plant on the floor next to her bed.

“Those are breakable so, please, don’t destroy them,” the green-haired twin said in the same tone of voice, pronouncing the ‘please’ as if it was the most vile word in existence.

Griffin looked at the labels of the boxes since it was obvious that neither of her “roommates” intended to tell her what they contained. “Those are a lot of animal parts,” she said, trying to keep the emotions out of her voice but her brain disagreed with her. It wasn’t that she cared for animals or was scared or anything. But it was disgusting to have so many dead insects in your bedroom.

“That’s Zara for you,” the black-haired witch–Ediltrude then–laughed. “You’ll get used to it. And to the smoke from the failed potions, too.” Her eyes narrowed as if she was trying to recall more details. “And to the side effects of those.”

Griffin was about to object to having experiments with potions run into the space she had to share with them but Zarathustra spoke first.

“Hey, I’m good at this,” she glared at her sister. “And of course, there’d be some mistakes. I’m working without instructions sometimes,” she motioned to whatever it was she was currently doing and Griffin noticed a frightening lack of any papers or books on her desk. She was working without any directions indeed.

“You’re a total disaster, sis,” Ediltrude waved her off which only had Zarathustra step closer to her, looking like a bull that was ready to charge at the red flag waved in front of it.

“And when was the last time you did some independent work instead of just following instructions, little sis?” she asked through gritted teeth, making Griffin plop herself down on her bed in despair. From the short interaction she’d first had with the sisters she’d learned that the only thing more annoying than the two of them making digs at her was the two of them arguing with each other. And it was happening again. She’d spent a total of eleven minutes with them–she was counting the seconds of her torture–and they’d already managed to get into a fight four times.

“Talking shit again, I see,” Ediltrude glowered as she jumped from the desk, towering over her sister since she was a lot taller. Especially in her heels.

Griffin huffed in total exhaustion, drawing their attention to herself. From the glares they both gave her she could tell it would be a long day.

31 – lies

I wanted to come up with something that felt more original which is why it took me so long to figure this out. But it’s here now and… Current mood – what have I done?

It was rather strange to lie next to Faragonda. It was like having a sleepover again and she was glad they’d managed to fix their relationship to the point where remembering the good old days didn’t leave an acrid taste in her mouth. But this time it was not friendship or laughter that had brought them together.

Faragonda had come to tell her that there’d been… a breach at the Omega portal on Andros. And then she’d offered to stay with her for the rest of the night. She couldn’t have denied if she’d wanted to. But Faragonda didn’t seem quite there herself.

“If you got the chance,” she started, wondering whether that was a good idea but leaving things unspoken seemed too cruel to both of them, “you wouldn’t kill him.” She didn’t want to start with that but she knew Faragonda too well to not sense the abnormal amounts of dark energy flowing from her. Of course, it could be because she’d just seen her student blinded which Griffin was sure would’ve sent her into a fit of murderous rage had she been in Faragonda’s shoes. Even if Layla had healed herself. But it wasn’t just that. It wasn’t one thing. There was a hurricane of memories swirling in her own head and she knew Faragonda was at the same mental place. Or as close as it could get at least.

“True,” Faragonda said, her voice quiet but not because of hesitation or shame.

Griffin had expected that much. It was why she’d went for their old way of talking things out when it was too hard to say the words as they were in your head. There was no need for hiding and lying between the two of them since neither of those was possible anyway. But some things were too difficult to say and too acidic to be kept inside. So they played a game of guessing in which lies were true.

“I can’t stand the thought of him hurting you, too,” Faragonda was now speaking as they normally would, without turning things around on one-eighty so that they’d be easier to say. And Griffin wished she could reassure her that that wouldn’t happen but she’d be lying. And that was not the kind of lie Faragonda would accept. Not even to soothe her restless mind that was no doubt preoccupied with the memories of Oritel and Marion’s death. It had hit hard enough to make her willing to murder. And that was something that terrified Griffin because it spoke loud and clear of Faragonda’s pain and yet, she had no idea how to help her. “Taking you away…”

“He won’t be able to do that,” Griffin said as she took Faragonda’s hand in hers. That she could promise her. He could do many things to both of them–a lot of which most certainly worse than death–but not that.

“He hates you,” Faragonda fired out as she pulled her hand away, running from false, empty comfort just like Griffin had thought she would. But that wasn’t what her words were.

“I know.” That was something that had been proven many times. Yet, it still hurt enough for her to wish to deny it, wish to jump back into a version of their game where they could change the truth by not accepting it. “That’s exactly why I’m saying it. I know him best.” And she knew he wouldn’t let her live in peace but he wouldn’t kill her either. For that would end her suffering. And he had too much hatred to spare to deprive himself of a target to aim it at. Especially the one that had hurt him like no one else ever had.

“You don’t love him anymore?” It didn’t escape Griffin’s notice that Faragonda’s tone was questioning. As if she wasn’t quite sure whether this was part of their game or reality. And she wished for that uncertainty, too, because knowing the answer hurt too much.

“True,” she said even though confirming the lie was just as hard as saying the truth would’ve been. She never would’ve been able to speak those words. Or their opposites for that matter. Because the truth was that both hurt. Both burned. In different ways. But still enough to leave vicious wounds behind that could only be soothed by one thing. And that wasn’t the lies she told herself, but a truth that would never come from him. For Valtor would never love her again.

[polar-stars]

Sorina and RyoAli for the ultimate ship. Lesgooo!!

RyoAli was done here already -> https://polar-stars.tumblr.com/post/187929041811/mimasaka-x-nao-hojo-x-kuga-and-ryo-x-alice-please

I’ll try my best for Sorina then ;w; !

General:

Rate the Ship -  Awful | Ew | No pics pls | I’m not comfortable | Alright | I like it! | Got Pics? | Let’s do it! | Why is this not getting more attention?! | The OTP to rule all other OTPs

How long will they last? - Lets hope Long

How quickly did/will they fall in love? - Haha, quite some time. Their first meeting wasn’t exactly the best. 

How was their first kiss? - Rather aggressive but so insanely overdue and filled with held-back emotions

Wedding:

Who proposed? - Soma

Who is the best man/men? - Takumi and I guess also Akira and Ryo !

Who is the braid’s maid(s)? - Hisako and Alice !!! Maybe also Ikumi!

Who did the most planning? - Erina, with Alice’s and Hisako’s help of course. 

Who stressed the most? - Also Erina. 

How fancy was the ceremony? - Back of a pickup truck | 2 | 3 | 4 | Normal Church Wedding | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Kate and William wish they were this big.

Who was specifically not invited to the wedding? - THE NASTY PART OF THE NAKIRI-FAMILY

-NSFW-

Sex:

Who is on top? - Soma, mostly. Though Erina can most certainly top as well if she wants to. 

Who is the one to instigate things? - Soma mostly. 

How healthy is their sex life? - Barely touch themselves let alone each other | 2 | 3 | 4 | Once a couple weeks, nothing overboard | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They are humping each other on the couch right now

How kinky are they? - Straight missionary with the lights off | 2 | 3 | 4 | Might try some butt stuff and toys | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Don’t go into the sex dungeon without a horse’s head

How long do they normally last? - Quite a few rounds, I’d say. 

Do they make sure each person gets an equal amount of orgasms? -

How rough are they in bed? - I think so. Erina wants to be pleasured. Softer than a butterfly on the back of a bunny | 2 | 3 | 4 | The bed’s shaking and squeaking every time | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | Their dirty talk is so vulgar it’d make Dwayne Johnson blush. Also, the wall’s so weak it could collapse the next time they do it.

How much cuddling/snuggling do they do? - No touching after sex | 2 | 3 | 4 | A little spooning at night, or on the couch, but not in public | 6 | 7 | 8 | 9 | They snuggle and kiss more often than a teen couple on their fifth date to a pillow factory.

Children:

How many children will they have naturally? - Two, a boy and a girl

How many children will they adopt? - None

Who gets stuck with the most diapers? - Soma

Who is the stricter parent? - Erina

Who stops the kid(s) from doing dangerous stunts after school? - Also Erina. 

Who remembers to pack the lunch(es)? - Both, because of course Soma and Erina make a competition out of that, as one would expect. They compete every evening beforehand for Bento-Rights ajdhd

Who is the more loved parent? - They’re both loved equally, tho Hiraku is possibly a bit closer to Soma and Kimiko a bit closer to Erina. 

Who is more likely to attend the PTA meetings? Erina!

Who cried the most at graduation? - Erina, being soft. 

Who is more likely to bail the child(ren) out of trouble with the law? - Soma

Cooking:

Who does the most cooking? - ITS AN ENDLESS COMPETITION

Who is the most picky in their food choice? - The God Tongue herself of course, who else?

Who does the grocery shopping? - Soma! He loves Grocery Shopping! He takes the kids with him!

How often do they bake desserts? - Here and there, when one of them has an interesting recipe in mind! 

Are they more of a meat lover or a salad eater? - I’d say...Meat

Who is more likely to surprise the other(s) with an anniversary dinner? - Soma! He’d love to see the enchanted surprise in Erina’s eyes

Who is more likely to suggest going out? - Soma

Who is more likely to burn the house down accidently while cooking? - Neither, they’re professionals

Chores:

Who cleans the room? - Soma

Who is really against chores? - Erina-sama

Who cleans up after the pets? - They have none

Who is more likely to sweep everything under the rug? - Erina sometimes tends to

Who stresses the most when guests are coming over? - Erina 

Who found a dollar between the couch cushions while cleaning? - Our lucky boy, Soma

Misc:

Who takes the longer showers/baths? - Erina ! 

Who takes the dog out for a walk? - They have none

How often do they decorate the room/house for the holidays? - Soma loves that ! He has great fun decorating for Halloween, Christmas, New Years and maybe even Easter. Erina slowly found fun in it as well. 

What are their goals for the relationship? - Being each others strive and inspiration, always pushing each other further and above their borders. And love of course. 

Who is most likely to sleep till noon? - Erina

Who plays the most pranks? - Soma

[fearsbellsarchived]

[me? Thinking about a gf fairytales au instead of being productive? More likely than u think!!! think ou.at buT BETTER and w/o the real world dimension hopping part. under the cut bc i just copy/pasted my tags from forever ago to put them in one place

mabel and dipper are hansel and gretal

paz is sleeping beauty 

bill is maleficient 

if we’re gonna get disney about it wendy as merida 

i LOVE the idea of tambry as rapunzel??? 

mabel can also be like...eric from the little mermaid 

so mermando can be ariel 

gIDEON AS URSULA/VANESSA IN THAT VEIN THO 

bill is also rumplestilskin 

stan can be the huntsman (idk from which story cause theres a fEW BUT)

ford is the sorcerer from fanstasia 

ford is teaching dipper magic....and instead of a true love’s kiss that’s how he wakes paz (maybe?)

the northwests made a deal w bill like in the most famous version of rumplestilskin but instead of wanting paz for himself he just wanted to steal her body at 16

so when they lose the deal they ask for help from ford and ford’s like “yo i can maybe change the deal??? a little bit???” so instead of bill taking her over when he goes to she falls asleep ​

so dipper wasnt supposed to wake her up but he found her and fords notes and he and mabel went on an adventure

bill is all the villains 

billains 

so stan has to leave mabel and dipper in the woods (idk y it wasnt for long the twins are just impatient) so stan disappears and the twins are like “lETS EXPLORE THE WOODS”

they come across some creepy old house w a lot of spiderwebs (can u guess the villain yet?)

an older woman comes out and is like “why are you guys lost in the forest?”

mabel points to the glitter trail “we’re not lost”

dipper looks behind them ‘mabel!!! where’s all the glitter?!”

(ACTUALLY MAYBE ITS YARN???) 

so they lose the trail 

meanwhile stan is losing his fucking mind

he follows the stray glitter but it’s blown all over

he feels “LOST IN THE WOOOOODDDS!!!”

so the old lady offers for them to stay the night bc its getting late

dipper is SUPER sus but he plays it cool surprisingly

mabel is So In!

long short...stan eventually saves them from darlene’s trap

usually shes just a maneater but look

when u live in the woods u do what u can

so stan hauls them back to their cottage

dipper knew there was weird shit out there but he wants MORE

he starts going through his great-uncle’s journals (*cue the dipper squee*)

he reads about bill and his deal w paz’s parents

he’s like....’maybe we should rescue her?’

ford wont tell him why they cant

so dipper and mabel sneak out

they steal the grunkles’ boat

mabel falls over board???

dipper tries like HELL to save her

but then he sees mermando save her

SO MABEL IS SAVED BY MERMANDO!!! 

gideon (who had long-loved mabel from afar) finds out

he visits the merman to trick him

all mabel remembers is his voice

so YES mermando trades his voice for legs just like the movie

sue me okay w his distinct accent it makes sense!!!

so the twins get sidetracked bc mermando shows up out of nowhere

they dock on a small island for a pit stop and thats when ‘kiss the girl’ happens

they dont kiss so they move on

they dock on another stretch of land the next day

AND GIDEON APPEARS

the twins have only heard about him from their grunkles so mabel hears his voice and goes *heart eyes*

mermando is Distressed

dipper is Focused on getting to this sleeping princess

mabel makes fun of him for liking her

SO GIDEON HAS MERMANDOS VOICE!

at one point dipper catches him w/o the amulet that makes him sound like mermando

and he tells mabel and its kinda like “the hand that rocks the mabel” or whatever the ep was called

it takes dipper and mermando being threatened (and gideons voice slipping) for her to catch on and she breaks up w him

dipper wants to throw him overboard

they just leave him on the next inhabited island they find

mermando got his kiss but decides to go back to the ocean anyway

he promises to write

mabel is Sad

SO BACK TO OUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED ADVENTURE!

the twins come across a land near the one paz is on and decide to stop for food and to stretch their legs and other hygiene things

they find out there’s some archery thing going on and mabel is like ’ooooh can we try?!’

turns out its for neighboring kingdoms’ princes to win a princess

mabel and dipper think this is RIDICULOUS so they crash it

mabel steps up to shoot and everyone’s like ‘wHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?’

then dipper steps up beside her. neither of them have shot a bow before

they shoot at the same time. mabel’s like thisclose to the bullseye. dippers too far right

THEN!!! PRINCESS WENDY COMES OUT OF NOWHERE

DIPPER AND MABEL ARE IN AWE OF THIS VALKYRIE. THEYRE BOTH READY FOR HER TO KILL THEM BC THEY THINK ITLL BE AWESOME

but wendy is like ‘ACTUALLY ILL SHOOT FOR MYSELF THANKS’ and splits like three arrows down the middle w her accuracy

she looks at mabel and dipper and is like ‘u dudes look fun! ive never seen u before who are u???’

and they’re like ‘WELL!’ and launch into detail about their adventure w overlapping voices and sound affects and VAST description

anyways. i cant decide how old people are rn okay 

so wendy is like “hey dad??? im going on an adventure w these guys!” and her dad is like “unusual but u DID just win ur own hand. so ill allow it”

“YES! can i take soos too?!” 

“sure!”

sO THEYRE OFF AGAIN!!! lemme tell u the ship is filling faST!!!

they get to paz’s land. and the first thing they find is a girl in a tower with long purple hair.

everyone is pretty much just making ‘wtf’ faces for like....ten minutes.

finally wendy calls up the tower like “YO! WHATS W ALL THE HAIR?!”

tambry leans out the window w a bored expression and goes “its mine. im tambry. who r u?”

they introduce themselves and are like “u wanna come on our adventure?”

then....ROBBIE APPEARS!

and he knows where the princess is!!!

”oh yeah. her. shes also in a tower. its got a door but its guarded by gnomes.”

then robbie climbs tambrys hair pecks her cheek and ducks in the tower

they decide to head for the tower robbie directed them to. but they have to pass the castle. Northwest Castle

robbie warned them about the northwests. said that the princess was one and before she disappeared she was the snottiest brat hed ever met

so they became friends despite the fact that he plays music for a living (and not very well either)

her parents told her of the spell when she was twelve

so robbie’s like “they are not nice people and neither was she??? most of the townsfolk are glad shes asleep tbh”

but dammit! dipper came here for an adventure!!! he wasnt going to stop just bc the princess wasnt what he expected!

so they continue on!

mabel is like “maybe she doesnt KNOW how to be nice!”

and soos is just excited to be there!

and wendy is just...u kno...chill

they start to get close to the castle and they feel like they’re being watched

and then soos notices the PEACOCKS!

they assume theyre spies for the king and queen. which is half true?

they can also warn bill if someone is near pacifica

oh damn imagine that

being stuck asleep w a DREAM DEMON in ur head

sorry for the accidental psychological torture paz

WHICH IS THE ONLY TORTURE SHES HAD!

i think to make up for risking her life as a baby ther parents were like “we’re just gonna spoil u rotten and PRETEND u do no wrong eVERYTHING IS FINE”

so dipper is reading the journal and he FINALLY gets to the true loves kiss part of the deal

and he looks around at the party like “oh shit true love what do we do???”

mabel suggests he at least try and everyone agrees that yeah okay thats the back up plan

but dipper wants to use a SPELL!!!

so the king and queen see him w the journal and remember ford having the same one

so everyone is brought to the king and queen

theyre like “pRINCESS GWENDOLYN?!”

bc this is MY STORY and if i wanna give wendy a more princess-y name thEN I WILL

i say as i continue to refer to mason as DIPPER!!!

SO THEYRE MEETING THE NORTHWESTS!!!

wendys like “yes that is me the princess” and then everyone else introduces themselves...w dipper introducing himself as mason bc it just sounds more fairytale-y

soos is jesus (hey zeus! not jee sus)

soos is like....wendys bff/personal servant but mostly bff

so they explain their adventure to the northwests as quickly as possible

preston is no patient man and he’s is like “tbh its probably important she be here for her 18th bday soooo??? as long as she wakes up by next year why not???”

but only bc dipper was like “i wANNA USE MAGIC I DONT WANNA KISS HER THATS PLAN B!!!”

plus u kno...even if he DOES whats the guarantee itll work???

the guarantee is me being a filthy shipper tHATS WHAT!!!

so they continue to the tower!

there is probably a sidequest thingy with giffany bc i liked that episode

also soos needs more screentime im sorry

SO THEN!!! FINALLY!!!! THEY MAKE IT TO THE TOWER!!!

WHICH IS!!!

IN FACT!!!

GUARDED

BY

GNOMES!]

also theres a manotaur/multi-bear sidequest i just thought of bc i like THAT episode!!!

is this gf, a fairytale, sk.yrim, or a d.n.d campaign now??? WHO KNOWS!!! ITS NOT ME!!!

SO THEY GOTTA GET PAST THE GNOMES!

first they offer safe passage in exchange for mabel as their queen

after thats declined theyre like “or the redhead. well take her!”

this is also declined

finally jeff tells them to attack

at first the party tries to fight them off and they do okay

uNTIL SOME GNOME WEAPONIZED SCHMEBULOCKS RAINBOW PUKE!!! (i think it’s toxic tbh but i dONT REMEMBER)

finally mabel just pulls out her trusty crosSbow (aka “GRAPPLING HOOK!”) and they just make a tightrope to the window above the door

wendy goes first and NAILS it

then everyone else follows

soos almost falls and gets left to the gnomes but everyone helps him balance and they all make it through the window

coincidentally. the window leads to the princess’s room

OH MAN WHY DIDNT I USE THE PTERODACTYL?!

oh well. anyways.

everyone is looking around the room and like...taking it all in

dipper takes a moment...then walks over to the princess

he isnt sure if waking her will also wake the demon

crossover even more w my old paciphera au??? idk probably not

so dipper tries the spells he narrowed it down to

none of them work

all his friends have returned to the princess’s room and mabel is like “u gotta kiss her brobro!”

so dipper...poor poor dipper...just leans forward and kisses her

paz pretty much snaps her eyes open when dipper is a half inch from her face while he’s pulling back 

and even tho she was forewarned she wasnt expecting DIPPER so she SCREAMS

dippers ears are ringing

she shuts her eyes and stills her breathing and sits up.

AND SEES EVERYONE ELSE AND SCREAMS AGAIN

“i dIDNT EXPECT U TO BRING *FRIENDS*!”

so once shes a little more calm they explain the whole adventure to her

paz feels a little honored they came all this way just for her

also since True Love beats everything bill is like.....back in his home dimension. also paz has been fighting him for like....over a year.

so paz is like....ready to Go. u kno. just wants to go HOME.

they get pazs shit together and exit the tower through the door

she says goodbye to the gnomes. all by name.

“oh yeah mom and dad made them my personal guard when i was like...eight. theyve been prepping for this my whole life. they’ll meet me back at the castle.” so then she starts telling them about herself and her last like 

two years of being asleep w a DREAM DEMON

“sometimes i got the weirdest nightmares??? and they never ended. but when i woke up i couldnt remember anything specific.”

she and dipper talk away from the group. he tells her about how hes her true love and everything “okay well. we’ll have to lie to my parents and say it was a spell. bc they will NOT approve of us being true loves and if they hurt you...”

“then they hurt *you* too!” dipper finishes (idk maybe a combo w a soulmate au thing?)

meanwhile mabel is like...whining about boy problems??? and wendy is like “this is y boys r dumb.”

soos is like...wandering off. I WANNA INCORPORATE MELODY BUT WHO SHOULD SHE BE?!

paz and dipper start like....arguing about how to deal w her parents

apparently they actually ARENT that nice. if she doesnt marry a prince they’ll give her over to bill completely...or something idk

SO theyre nearing the castle!!!

theyve written theyre grunkles okay no worries. also mermando.

thats y mabels complaing about boys.

mermando and that manatee wife of his!!!

paz is not exactly ready to face her parents so she convinces the party (roll for charisma) to go the long way

which is actually just circles

anyways

we run back in to melody and soos and the party is like ‘wHOOPS WE DIDNT EVEN NOTICE GLAD U DIDNT GET EATEN BY A SPIDER LADY!

maybe melody is like....a fairy???

something light and ‘childish’ bc thatd fit her personality

soos is like “ive BEEN here. u dudes have been going in circles.” and everyone glares at paz.

“im sorry!!! i just dont want to go back!!!”

“ur dad made us promise to have u back for ur 18th bday.” says dipper while he tries to stay mad at his future wife

paz is like “YEAH SO HE CAN MARRY ME OFF TO A PRINCE!!!”

idk why paz and dips are being better at being soulmates here okay i was like....sleep-drunk when i first wrote this

so the party has a choice to make.

take paz back home where she wont be able to be w her TL (which in some cases has probably led to death) OR!!!

sneak her out and take her home w them?!

wendys probably gotta go back to her own kingdom tho.

and soos wants to stay w melody

U KNOW WHAT I JUST REALIZED?!

sTAN NEVER GOT TO BE SOOS’S DAD!!!!

SORRY SOOS!!!

so anyways

mabel and dipper decide to help her sneak out

luckily she knows all the blindspots

it takes longer but they finally make it back to their ship

they say theyre goodbyes to soos and melody and paz wishes them well in her kingdom. she promises to return when shes ready to rule

they load the ship and sail to wendys kingdom next

they stay a few days to recuperate

paz has trouble sleeping bc when she does the nightmares come back.

cue a kat.niss/pee.ta thing where paz sleeps next to dips bc it keeps the nightmares away

wendy has to explain why soos isnt w them to her dad who kinda shrugs it off?

“u proved u can protect urself.” or something.

after like.....a whole fucking year the twins are heading home.

paz and dipper sleep together on the ship too bc its just fucking easier

paz is nervous to meet the grunks

she and dipper arent exactly....dating??? its def more like soulmate au

where theyre AWARE theyre supposed to be together but they dont even rly know if they WANT to be together.

paz is p much “i dont rly wanna be w anyone else. ill let u kno if that changes.” and dips is like “tbh same.”

mabel is already planning a big royal wedding.

iDK Y BUT I WANT THEM TO FIND OUT THEYVE BEEN ROYALTY ALL THIS TIME??? probably just bc i LOVE that trope!!! but theyre not so its whateves.

so they FINALLY get home. mabel has been writing letters this whole time. to mermanso. to soos and melody. to wendy.

shes the captain of the dip.ifica ship and shes gotta keep her crewmembers in the know!!!

the twins also wrote to the grunks the whole time so!!!! no worries!!!

paz tries writing to her parents...but she can never find the right words.

meeting the grunks isnt as bad as she thought???

stan loves her off the bat. partially bc shes rich and bc she doesnt take shit

ford is pleased to meet the girl he saved and shes v v thankful to him for saving her life as best he could.

it takes her like a YEAR to write the letter.

she promises her parents she’ll return. AFTER shes married.

at this point she and dipper ARE together. they figured all theyre confusion out and are just living the good life!

mabel and wendy are doing the long distance thing. shes still friends w mermando.

robbie and tambry found paz and they write back and forth.

u CAN TAKE ROBBIE AND PAZ SIBLINGS FROM MY DECOMPOSING HANDS!!!

everything is as happily ever after as it can get.

and then dipper proposes despite knowing what it means.

BUT THATS A WHOLE OTHER ADVENTURE!!!!

*end credits roll. an epic theme song starts playing*

[ts-2020-olympics]

EPISODE 1 - “My Legs Were Not Qwoperating” - Kathy (Part 2)

no. jk here.

So, it’s morning. I look around at our camp, and see everyone is at work. Karen is painting their flag and using safety scissors to cut out Monty’s head, Kevin is chanting to himself in the corner, Stoner’s been asleep so we buried him in the sand up to his neck and then sculpted a sand castle around him. Tommy is just trying to make eye contact with anyone he can and so I’m...avoiding that. I’d say we are solid but that’s probably not the truth, and so that kind of stinks. I’m hoping the newbies really fuck up, and I know that’s harsh but...that’s showbiz, babe!! Speaking of newbies I still haven’t talked to a few of them.  Emma like zoomed away the first day and I’ve given up on talking to her. Hope she goes first. That’s all I got for now, going to eat breakfast I will continue this rant later.

my truth is that i haven’t played an org game in so long i forgot i was playing and then remembered an hour ago and tried to do this wack qwop game hsksksj! my legs were not qwoperating 

I see there's an arena going on! I might go there first if the rest of the team is okay with it - gives me a chance to scope things out and get a feel for the area. I'm excited!

WE WON THE FUCKING CHALLEEEENGE AAAAA NOT ONLY DID WE WIN BUT WE KILLT IT WE SCORED 12 AND EVERYONE ELSE GOT LIKE 8 AND 5 OHMYGOOOD IM NOT GONNA BE FIRST OUT YALL IM SHAKING I CANT BELIEVE GSJDKDVDSNDBWSKHSD okAy okay so thank god bc my tribe has like no drama so our vote would’ve been really difficult and that gives me more time to think about my possible advantage and the possible bonds here. 

so while I am safe I still have to game a little bit and talk to the people I’ve been talking with who are going to tribal like Sammy and Jordan, funny enough who are on the same tribe.... maybe I can get them to protect each other..... hm

Well we lost because of technicalities, I choose to blame that. This tribe is apparently extremely quiet to each other, so the fact that I messaged everyone hello this morning, nearly 48 hours after the start, I am SOMEHOW one of the best social players here. Challenges are generally my strength, we got last in QWOP, so backup is social game in a social ORG. I can be in some danger here, but I think I have a TRusuT sclusTER to keep myself here. As is necessary. I don't care who goes, I have a preference, but I don't really want to set a goal right now. Flexibility is key.

I'm literally PISSED. I'm fuming right now, like wtf? OK so I haven't confessed anything yet because my tribe has been SO quiet. I've honestly talked a lot more to some of the people from ONE WORLD than I have from some of the people from my own tribe... and I'm not crazy okay? It's NOT my fault. I put in effort with these people... But some of these people are just DRY! Drier than the Sahara Desert! Drier than my chappy ass lips! They can't hold a conversation, and that's obnoxious. I'm not going to respond to you if your message has literally nothing in it worth responding to, that's why most of my messages will either have a follow-up question, or something actually of substance to comment on/reply to... YOU SHOULD DO THE SAME SO WE CAN ACTUALLY SPEAK AND MAINTAIN A CONSISTENT DIALOGUE!!!!!!! But NOOOOOOO, my tribe decides to not speak... MOVING ON! The only people I've had good conversations with really are Juls and Em, and lo and behold, Em does lit rally nothing in this challenge, which sucks because I'm afraid that may put a target on her back. But I'm not sure, I definitely will vote with her and I think Juls will too. I'll move onto that later but I wanna talk about why I'm fucking LIVID RIGHT NOW. I literally made SO many suggestions on how we could tweak who does what in this challenge, or what we do on certain parts. Now I'm going to admit a TINY bit of fault here, in that I didn't say my suggestions on the tribe flag. There are some things I think we could've done to make it better, but I love Juls, and everyone had already told her it was great, so I didn't wanna make her feel that I didn't like it or was over criticizing. So I didn't say anything. That was my bad. BUT EVERYTHING ELSE, LUV? I said We should guess lower than 610... Now granted my even 600 guess still would've been too low to win, BUT AT LEAST IT WOULDN'T HAVE BEEN OVERBOARD! HMPPHH!!!!! Or maybe we could've compromised on 605 if people hadnt IGNORED ME!!!! IDK!??!?!?! Further than that, I asked for different tweaking on the chant and nobody gave any suggestions. I'm not saying we would've won or anything had I taken the lead or that I was doing everything the right way,  obviously I wasn't since my chant got 3rd, but what I'm saying is once it became obvious the challenge was going to be about group participation and suggestion, our tribe needed to unify. Everyone in the tribe needed to have a clearer vision and talk to eachother and actually put in the EFFORT that this stuff requires. Which I'm admitting my own error, in not doing that with the flag. But our tribe was just so quiet and silent before now, which sent me down a paranoid spiral, that I was super fucking worried about my place in the tribe or where things were heading. Now I realize I'm in a good position on the tribe for sure, it's just that our tribe is STRUGGLING. ON THE (Mr.) BRIGHTSIDE!!! We lost by a tiebreaker guess, and only by 4 points.... and I'm pretty close with Juls, and it seems like a target will probably fall pretty easily onto Billy. He had the worst QWOP score, described himself as arrogant in his own intro, and just seems.. critical of others. He gives off a strange vibe. If it's not him, I'm pretty sure it'd end up being Jacob or Em. I feel that me and Juls are safe which is all that I can hope for on a tribe this freaking tiny, I instantly connected with Juls over our love of anime, the fact her name is the same as Euphoria Jules, and other stuff. As far as One World goes, I honestly keep forgetting it exists. I haven't reached out to too many of the others but have talked back to those who talk to me and it's been generally decent. I get along well with other Jacob, the not pie one. Caeleb I already know from before this and so I feel like we'd def work together, and I get good vibes from a lot of these people like Eve, Nicole, Ben, etc. Honestly I'm just so frustrated right now because things have been quiet and nervous and I'm PARANOID, and my tribe was so close to winning but fucked it up over minor things we could've tweaked had we just tried a little harder and communicated a little more. ugh, this SUCKS. now my first legacy in Tumblr Survivor is a mediocre chant (i honestly really like it and i put a LOT OF THOUGHT INTO IT OKAY....) and a trip to tribal council *Sobs* Here's hoping things take a positive turn from here...? It could always be the Bronze before my Gold! ~Hamfisted olympics metaphor~

Love my tribe a lot! However, i still feel on the outside somewhat tho.... Idk this is a lot for me I just hope we win until a swap or whatever its called ahh

Alright, Darcy back here with yet another confessional!   Here is a little update since I last posted confessional, mainly the biggest difference is now I have an ally formed with Ben.   At least, I made a deal with Ben yesterday proposing just the generic looking after one another ordeal, then going to give it some time and maybe question Beck about forming an alliance, since I've been connecting with her even more past bit, but don't want to go too fast and end up asking half my tribe right away to work with me, as I don't want to be seen as playing hard out the gate and make myself a target.   Meanwhile, I decided to give the Olympic Village searching a shot, but alas was no luck in the cafeteria cabinets, so will just have to try my luck again in the future rounds.   Thinking of searching either the South or North end of Village next round, but we shall see.   Anyways, I'm glad my tribe won Immunity, so don't have to go to tribal this round, and this Olympic Arena twist sounds great, essentially one person from each tribe goes to the Arena, I believe for the immune tribes just 1 person is selected to go to the Arena, and for the losing tribes, the two voted out go to arena, where the winner of the voted out people come back in the game, and loser is out of the game for good.   Think I read that all right, but maybe won't hurt to give it another read to double check.   For now though, I shall go, so will see you all with my next confessional.

Fuck having to go to tribal first. I don’t like having to send someone home when I don’t even really know who I’m playing with yet. 

Seems like Billy pulling the "I don't want to make any moves" to me was surprisingly bullshit. Who would've thunk. I think everyone is fine with voting out Billy here, I didn't really want to initially, but yeah, uh no. I could be in danger, but if everyone is honest here, I should be fine. Fingers crossed. "I'm either going to be first boot or win" - Pia Miranda

So, the first tribal is in a bit and we were almost sent there but managed to pull through in the tiebreaker! I hope that opens some of my tribemates eyes (lets be real, just Stoner who hasn’t been doing much of anything!) Being in One World but none of the newbies talking to me is still wild to me, half of them still haven’t even accepted my contact request. Yet they’re plenty active in the chat, so what gives? Anyway, I hope it’s just that they are intimidated by the very fact that I am beauty, and grace, and Miss United States. I hope we can win the next round, hopefully first or second place so we don’t have a close call again. We are trying to get Chris to go to the Arena so he can get us that 20% but he hasn’t answered so...what gives? On the alliance front I’m good with Kevin and Karen tribewise , the bigger picture is Kevin, Jacob and Sammy want to align and then we will have a bigger alliance that includes Beck, Juls and Eve. Eventually I might wanna break off and align with Jules and Eve, but having bigger targets around is essential. Anyway that’s all I got for now. I should start making video confessionals AS THINGS ARE HAPPENING. Ya know? Anyway toodles for now see ya next round. OH, and I’m hoping Jules and Jacob are safe this tribal :( love them and hope we can work together going forward. 

Hiiii, arena results are about to come in so I'm just gonna drop a quickie confessional before that happens. I don't honestly remember how much I talked about the strategy and gameplay that was going on, so I'll give you a quick rebriefing of that. I'm really close with Juls. Em I like, but I want more out of her. Jacob is quiet, but inoffensive. Billy, I actually like him, but there are certain things about him that just.. Rub me (and others) a strange way and that's why we voted him out because certain things he did just didn't quite gel with the rest of the team. If he does return from the arena though, it's possibly I may vouch for him over Jacob because Jacob... HE JUST NEEDS TO TALK!!! But idk. One world still SUCKS and is dragging me through the MUD because nobody wants to do cross-tribe talking me included but that gets me paranoid as FUCK, luv. About the live tribal, it was fun! My camera angle was awkward and I was soo nervous though, but I think I was still able to hold it together relatively well, act normal, and give semi-decent answers. Will definitely be improving my live tribal performance for next time so I can be a bad ass bitch on call, it's GOING to happen... dskfdsf. I love Emma on call/video sooooo much, But on text she's kind of dry. Maybe I need to ask her if I can call her sometime, but I haven't done a call for a game like this in a looong time. I'm a bit nervous about that. But yeah. I'm looking forward to the game... The first tribal just makes everything real, and you realize, oh shit, we're playing Survivor. And I forgot how thrilling it was to play in a live, video environment like that, it just grips you and it feels so much more intense than when wiki results are just posted in chat and you don't have to deal with physically seeing the person you're voting out, talking to them with your actual voice, etc. All that stuff just makes the experience that much more realistic and it's so intense and fun. I'm ready to get this game on (Btw fuck the arena twist)

hey guys im really loving this game so far... keep up the good work!

i didn’t appreciate the attitude billy gave me whenever i tried to help the team out but! i’m willing to get over it because he is a nice guy. i feel fairly comfortable with my team and i’m just hoping we can avoid another tribal! 

Hello! I can not believe I'm back for a 6th time on Tumblr Survivor this is so crazy! Especially for an Olympic season because I vowed to myself that I would never do a season again that was more than 20 people after being in Japan. Now that I'm back I'm ready to play, I haven't really came into this season with a strategy but if I did it would have changed because this is a One World season and now with the arena twist I'm sweating. One World makes the season super social (probably one of my least favorite twists) it's very easy for this season to let pre-mades and majorities take over just like that and let underdogs like me in this season to get taken out especially taken out early. So I have been social not only with me but a few people on different tribes but not too much. I don't want to seem like I'm playing too hard but I wanna build relationships before swaps happen so that people choose to ally with me (A WINNER) over a newbie or a returnee who hasn't won because I already have a big target on my back. With how the tribe divisions are it gives the newbies the biggest advantage with 15 newbies compared to 5 winners and 5 non-winner returnees, which isn't bad in a Fan vs. Favorite season because the ratio is even with returnees and newbies. However, now that I'm in the minority and also labeled a WINNER, I have to do damage control to lower my target but most importantly integrate with other people which is hard because I'm not the best social player and I know that's my weakness but I still have to attempt. In terms of my own tribe I'm closest to Kevin, when I talk to him we have a good conversation I probably already irritate him but I think out of everyone I can put my trust in him the most compared to everyone else. I think having one good ally is how I want to approach this season due to the arena twist I don't want to come across as running the tribe especially the winners tribe incase we do go to tribal because if I vote in the majority and that person stays they are immune and will be mad and spill the beans about the tribe, and I want that person to be the least mad at me so the focus is not on me. So having overall good vibes and 1 strong connection is a good strategy for the long term game. It might put me at risk for being voted out in the short term but I want to play the long-term game. Preferably if it is up to me I'd want Nicole to be the next closest to Kevin and myself without myself having to make an official deal with Nicole so I'm not seen as the ringleader. Kevin says he wants Stoner to be the first one voted out on our tribe but honestly I rather it be Karen. Stoner has the reputation keeps his target bigger than the rest and I think Karen has the better chance of flipping on the winners and succeeding than Stoner does. So my target is Karen if we do lose. I also believe that there may be an alliance with Nicole, Kevin, and Karen which I hope is not an actual alliance because that's bad news for me. I hope we don't go to tribal because I don't wanna go to a tribal with only 5 people. Wish me luck!

Whew it has been one round and i've fucked up so much its not even funny. its a little funny. anyways i start this game on a tribe of 5, i allign with connor who ive never played a game with and find some similar common ground, and with jacob who seems chill. we lose the first challenge sucks and all hell breaks loose, long story short fuck sammy. I'm trying to work my way back in caeleb and jacobs good graces. its gonna be a rocky road, but its one i've driven before

[nightcoremoon]

I think part of the reason why I hate horror movies is because of the overreliance on jumpscares and shock value and BWAH SUDDEN LOUD NOISES rather than on atmosphere, believability, tension, fear.

here's a list of horror movies from google and the reasons why I hate them, or why I love them, or that they're not actually horror movies.

A quiet place: haven't seen it yet but it's a thriller more so than a horror. thrillers can be scary though but then again so can comedies. and romances. 50 shades is definitely scary: it is psychological abuse after all.

Halloween: slasher film, automatically boring and shit. I'm including the entirety of the franchise here, by the way, and I'm also gonna be including Friday the 13th, nightmare on elm street, etc. They're all the same brand of sensationalist garbage. maybe the very first in each series could be redeemable but the mass volume of shitty and terrible CGI gorefests have ruined them forever. "oh no the scary unkillable monster is coming after us and he's gonna kill us in overly violent ways" 💩

Hereditary: I don't even give a shit it looks trite EDIT maybe it's okay but I don't give enough of a shit to bother to ~give it a chance~ because hey. that's what fucking horror games are for.

Insidious: boring, not scary, 0/10

Get Out: haven't watched yet but will because it's a cinematic masterpiece that defies genre conventions

Bird Box: IM SO FUCKING SICK OF HEARING ABOUT FUCKING BIRD BOX SHUT THE FUCK UP ABOUT BIRD BOX HOLY SHIT. It's just the goddamn happening by shyamagofuckyourself and it's an excuse to profit off of sensationalist suicide. oohh so spooky. eat my ass, boggart

It: too much bad cgi makes it a comedy. plus a bunch of kids say fuck a lot. good movie that's technically horror I guess but is it scary? nah.

Suspiria: I've never heard of this movie

Annihilation: same

Split: M NIGHT SHYAMALAN IS A SHITTY FILMMAKER and also it's ableist as fuck so

Mandy: google you suck none of these movies have any mainstream appeal

The Conjuring: 💩💩💩

Hush: ??? you know what fuck it I'm skipping the ones that don't matter

The Vvitch: 🙄 my mom's a witch, my best friend's a witch, I'm a witch. hey yeah maybe let's not buy into christian colonialism please? scary witches are boring as shit. gimme something actually scary. like Catholics.

The Nun: wait shit not like that! and by that I mean BORING AS HELL aside from the jumpscares. which are shit

The Babadook: clearly an LGBT movie, not horror

Cabin in the Woods: a parody and an excellent one at that. at least the gore is in homage, or hilariously over the top

Sinister: the fucking epitome of shitty jumpscares and shock value and lack of atmosphere and bad acting and bad plot and jesus fucking christ this is one of the worst and most boring movies I've ever had the misfortune to see DONT WASTE YOUR GODDAMN TIME

Saw: it's actually a thriller with Cary Elwes, Danny Glover, Michael Emerson, and Tobin Bell. it's a campy cheesy low budget true to form horror film with adequate writing, good acting, AMAZING MUSIC BY CHARLIE CLOSER, and isn't over the top with gore considering it's all practical effects. top fucking notch but spawned a dozen terrible sequels.

Shaun of the Dead: it's a touching and heartfelt romantic comedy... with zombies, EXCELLENT CINEMATOGRAPHY, excellent acting, and sad parts that will rip your fucking heart out, stomp on it, and grind it to dust. literally one of the best movies ever made of all time, eat shit tarantino.

The Ring: eh, the original Japanese was better (Japanese horror is its own genre and not a part of this criticism, I actually really like original Japanese horror unfucked up by american audiences as long as it doesn't just gratuitously glorify suicide as Japan does), but this was still a really good mystery thriller with some really cool effects, and is the only movie that has ever actually scared me for real. even now I hate that there's a tv with a vcr right at the foot of my bed.

The Sixth Sense: shyamalan made a couple of good movies. this was one of them. but it wasn't a horror movie and if you didn't know the twist IT WAS A FUCKING AMAZING ONE. like, goddamn empire strikes back levels of supreme and god tier plot twists. it went a little overboard on shock value but compared to the rest of the COMPLETE BULLSHIT on this list (AND IN HIS OWN MOVIES) it really could've gone way further.

The Descent: goddamn claustrophobia. too much horribly cgi'd gore and terrible decisions to be truly enjoyable though. would've been a much better movie without the mutants and the middle finger to physics throat stabbing and the JUST FUCKING KICK IT YOU GODDAMN IDIOT and oh yeah the subtle misogyny. the first half was good tho

28 days later: shitty remake of a merely ok movie EDIT I was thinking of 28 weeks later, 28 days was actually okay I guess

Scream: did not age well but it's okay for being meta, despite the fucking torture porn of drew barrymore at the beginning. allowed for scary movie 1 though, so I'm glad it exists.

Paranormal Activity: PARANORMAL FUCKING ACTIVITY CAN EAT MY ASS, ITS SUCH A SUBLIME FAILURE OF EXECUTION. I WANTED IT TO BE GOOD BUT IT WASNT. oh well at least it inspired five nights at Freddy's. I'll go ahead and throw all shitty found footage movies under this one, including unfriended.

Blair Witch Project: a fucking pioneer of its time. a genre definer. truly scary. good movie. I'll go ahead and throw all good found footage movies under this one, including cloverfield.

The Shining: a thriller, not horror. but goddamn is it the scariest not horror movie ever made. Stephen king you magnificent bastard

Alien: goddamn fucking alien. science fiction masterpiece. director's a little creepy but eh, sigourney weaver kicks ass, and alien isolation is such a good game (despite its many flaws), and it's just so iconic in terms of sheer scope of concept. it's the same horror movie as anywhere else but in space, and I still can't fucking believe this was made in the 70s. this and Star Wars were FUCKING AMAZING, and the xenomorph? THATS ALL PRACTICAL EFFECTS BABEY. NO OVERRELIANCE ON CGI GUTS AND SHOCK VALUE HERE, ITS JUST PURE HORROR AT ITS FINEST. good movie. aliens was better. everything else... eeehhh...

The Thing: same as the descent but with men instead of women, and EVEN WORSE DECISION MAKING. IT IS UNBELIEVABLE JUST HOW GODDAMN STUPID EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THEM COULD POSSIBLY BE. and in the remake yeah the practical effects were mind blowingly fantastic and inspired dead space which I believe is one of the best horror games if not just best games or horror pieces of media if not just best pieces of media constructed. but the prequel? 🙄 no thanks

The exorcist: masterpiece of practical effects without an overreliance on jumpscares and gore

Jaws: it's Stephen fucking Spielberg in the 70s and one of the most influential horror films and just films in general

Hellraiser: okay I'll give all works by clive barker a pass here because goddamn is he a demented fucking genius if ever I saw one. if only Jericho was actually a good game, it could've been the next doom 3

Poltergeist: an actually good horror movie that depends on atmosphere and effects more so than jumpscares and gore? SIGN ME THE FUCK UP

Evil Dead: campy but misogynist. the sequel was a comedy so it's okay. the next sequel is also a comedy AND ARMY OF DARKNESS IS ONE OF THE BEST MOVIES EVER FUCKING MADE. FIGHT ME. and fuck the remake. sam raimi should've retired after spiderman 3. maybe even before that.

Texas Chainsaw Massacre: honestly not bad. it was actually freaky and believable. rednecks really are fucking scary with all their inbreeding and terrible music and hatred of black people. I refuse to acknowledge the original and the sequels.

Psycho: eh, hitchcock's worst is still better than most of the shit on this list.

The Wicker Man: OH GOD NOT THE BEES! AHHGUBLAHH MY EYES! AAAAAHHHHH!!! fucking excellent comedy. but it doesn't have any naked ladies in it like the original did. oh well, can't please everyone.

Night of the Living Dead: THOSE ZOMBIES ARE BULLSHIT. ZOMBIES CANT USE WEAPONS AND THEY SURE AS FUCK CANT TURN YOU INTO A ZOMBIE BY STABBING YOU WITH A TROWEL. THEY HAVE TO BITE YOU. FUCK YOU GEORGE ROMERO. Also, dawn of the dead was just sensationalist garbage. "They tore apart a real pig carcass tho so it looked like real intestines" what? the fuck??? who gives a shit????? I watch movies to escape from reality, dumbass. I don't beat off to chopped up human carcasses. If I want a zombie movie I want the walking dead sans the soap opera bullshit and the racism and then "no one is safe and everyone will die" boring mentality propagated by twd and got and other things I used to like but no longer care about (because why should I give a shit about it if everyone could die? I can already be sad enough about all the real people I know who die. enjoying the pain of the deaths of those important to us is a privilege the cishets have). the walking dead seasons 1&2 was pure horror and the very best kind. don't give me boring contrivances. "but sheena, night of the living dead was a trope definer! everything in it was original!" yeah, you know what else is original? *farting noise* George Romero is just rob zombie without a rock band. his best work was fucking call of duty. that's pathetic. "maybe you just don't like gore" HEY YEAH SURE I DONT WANNA SEE UBER REALISTIC INTESTINES AND ORGANS IF THEY ARENT PART OF A MEDICAL DEAL SO IM JUST A BIG DUMB HATER. I'm the one in the wrong. fuck me, right?

Don't Breathe: A FUCKING TURKEY BASTER FILLED WITH SEMEN. THATS SO STUPID I FORGOT IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE SCARY. BEST CRINGE COMEDY OF THE YEAR :D

Tremors: legitimately great movie with a hundred shitty sequels. like saw but your faves win so you walk away filled with determination rather than sad and disappointed. enjoyment of tragedies are a privilege awarded to those who are neurotypical.

Zombieland: gore done right. the only casualty is mindless zomzoms and bill murray. good. granted it counts as a romance and a comedy but honestly last time I watched it I cried at the part where you find out buck isn't tallahassee's dog. god I love that movie. AND FOR WHOM THE BELL TOLLS IS THE MOST BADASS MOVIE OPENER EVER.

The Fly: Jeff fucking goldblum. amazing effects for good reasons. need I say more? the original doesn't exist because 1950s horror movies are all bad because all 1950s movies are bad. the 1950s should just be purged from america's records except for pleasantville.

All other Stephen king movies: hit or miss but mostly still good. although very few are actual horror.

10 cloverfield lane: more of a thriller like above's misery but still an amazing movie.

Peeping Tom: literally a movie about how creepy it is to fetishize the deaths of women WHILE LITERALLY FETISHIZING THE DEATHS OF WOMEN. like, come on man. how do you miss your own point so completely?

Invasion of the body snatchers: it's not horror and if it's made to be horror using gore it's shit. the whole thing is just an allegory to the joe mccarthy communism witch hunts anyway.

Cube trilogy: the ultimate b movies. so bad they're good. and it's such an interesting concept too!

Killer Klowns from Outer Space: fucking alien clowns come to earth to turn us into cotton candy by killing us using carnival fare. THIS IS THE GREATEST BAD MOVIE EVER MADE.

All horror movies based on horror video games: either irredeemably bad, or action movies

All creepy Netflix horror movies: wow any idiot with a camera and basic cgi skills can throw shit together to make a movie these days, huh

The Slender Man: I am literally too pissed off about this movie to insult it.

Marble Hornets, Tribe Twelve, the Slender Man movie on YouTube: triumphs of meta, editing, found footage, proof of concept, and story. Slenderman is such a malleable entity for a perfect horror experience, HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY FUCK THAT UP? YOUD HAVE TO BE INTENTIONALLY SABOTAGING YOUR WHOLE MOVIE TO FUCK IT UP AS BAD AS SOMEone who exclusively directs remakes... oh... oh no.

Wrong Turn: one mediocre movie and a dozen loathesome snoozefests coasting by on shock value

Troll 2:

oh god

they're eating her

and then

they're gonna eat me

...

oh my gooooooooooooooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO-

(Troll 2 is literally the worst movie ever made and I have to respect it for that at least)

but yeah, horror is just bad for movies. but for video games, though...

[dumbcoffeebee]

(re)analyzing bnha dorms & 'critiquing' things, questioning things, and suggesting additions for the second time

first up, midoriya-

v on brand. lil extra tho even for him. classic fanboy with all the posters n figurines. add some glow in the dark stars from the 80s/90s like in-between the ceiling & the top of the wall like- getting less concentrated the further down the wall and the further they go towards the middle of the ceiling if that makes sense so it gives it a little bit more vibes, less room-turned-shrine yk? also I feel like he'd have late 80s early 90s kid vibes for some reason.

Todoroki-

nice, vibes are immaculate. still impressed on how he did all that in a seemingly short amount of time. one question where does he sleep it doesnt look like he has a bed..? someone get this child a bed-

Iida-

v clean, v organized. so many books how does he have the time to read all those unless he speed-reads which, yeah thats on brand. bet theyre textbooks on literally every subject UA offers even the third year subjects/classes. also why does he have so many glasses. theres literally 16 pairs on those shelves that we can even see there might be more- child youve broken like what, 3 pairs? that may be a little overboard there but precautions ig. like I said, clean, possibly to a suspicious point tho what is he hiding-

Tokoyami-

very much vibes, really chill. reminds me over like a combo of both versions of Raven's room in the teen titans cartoons. purple light is v atmospheric, making it less outright scary more vaguely spooky and cool. nice sword & glowing orb too.

Denki-

oh my sweet summer child where do i start. this is a mess and a half istg what is he doing. his hero costume is great but this? not the vibes. bad vibes. no child it is not great. okay rant over diving into this pit of nonsense you could maybe call a room. leaving the more obvious for later, shoes. that we never see him wear. its weird bc they look like sneakerhead type shoes but thats not the vibe. also in the same area, hats. that he once again never wears. even in his civilian attire, i checked- no hat of any kind, & weirdly pointy but otherwise same shoes in both the UA uniform & his hero costume. also- why does he have a hat separate from the rest. why. moving on, nothing goes together. like kid. your fashion sense? v good. room styling? hell no. why. why are there so many colors pick a color theme. the animal prints clash so bad holy jesus at least Mina's looks somewhat cohesive in one big justice fever dream but what. no. child. please im dying here. what even is that wiggly thing near the window. furthermore, whats the deal with that black shirt in a frame?? its a regular shirt?? its a tshirt with no writing so its not a jersey or anything- what. last thing, whats the deal with the liscense plates. family car plates? he barely knows how to drive as seen in episode 89 when he was charging the car and driving, not terribly but not well, so i can only assume they're plates from family cars that he grabbed or they were stolen..? idk get this kid a cohesive room please.

Kiri-

okay not bad but not awesome. to put it short & sweet bc im quickly getting really tired and need to sleep, move the punching bag over so you dont have to weave around it every time you go out to & back in from the balcony, take the boxes out and organize a bit, get stuff off the floor, and take the extra arms off the clock- the clock annoys me sm for no reason.

Ojiro-

k. im going to talk a lot again so buckle up for some character analysis. his room is so boring its almost painful, and this is a reflection of his character. you can tell he was added in last minute to fill out the roster of Class 1-A and it shows. he's got nothing that defines him other than his quirk, and thats a problem. if you're writing a story, however long it may be, particularly a super-powered story but just in general, you never want a character to be defined by one thing and literally nothing else to the entirety of the character. yes, this is to contrast the other members of the class and is the sense of humor bnha leans into a lot in irony and such, but its when a character is only written to extenuate other characters with no other traits, thats where the problem starts. characters need to have something other than one defining trait, in this case a boring (in contrast to the other character's quirks) tail, and the overwhelming feeling of normal/boring. as everyone's normal is different, ill be using boring from here on out, which is not to imply that others will never find him interesting, hes just simply written to be the boring, rare comic relief character that was very obviously only there to round out the roster. he needs something to round out his character, even if he is a background character. hell, weve gotten more screen time and appearances of mineta than ojiro- the latter of whom is a perfectly respectable and friendly character, while the other is a horrible perv who apparently needs to be everywhere instead of more substantial, powerful characters, like jirou, momo, well- all the girls really, but also characters like ojiro and shinsou (i know hes not in class 1-A but shhhh its fine). anyways, the point is he needs something to round out his character if hes going to become a more substantial character, which i unfortunately doubt. some quick ideas would be basing his personality on his fighting style, seeing as hes a pretty substantial fighter. we could go the fighting-mimicks-personality route and say that because he is a close range fighter, hes quite in-your-face and doesnt really have a sense of physical or verbal boundaries (not in that way- he drinks his respect women juice every day thank you very much). or, we could go the opposite route and say that since his fighting style is close combat, he could be very closed off and distant physically when hes not fighting, and be quite short and bland in the verbal sense, although taking things too literally or not grasping social cues well could also be a nice touch. what does all that rambling mean for a room design? well it can be quite helpful, as people tend to put aspects of themselves into their rooms. if were going with the first idea i mentioned, his room could be very soft and chill, most likely with a brighter color scheme to match how he interacts with other characters. as for the second idea, the room could have furniture positioned to close off a section of the room, as well as darker or more desaturated colors and sharp edges. moving on.

Koda-

good reflection of character; soft and not much to say. nice color scheme, cute animals, simple and nice in general.

Hagakure-

although i do very much like the joke, made me laugh, i feel as though hagakure might go for something more in-your-face as to be noticed more. if you pay attention, especially in the intros, hagakure is generally front and center, though all you see is her boots and gloves, so you generally dont even notice shes there. shes always trying to be noticed to compensate for her quirk, so i feel shed have something more flashy or unique to stand out more.

Sato-

v practical as he bakes all the time for his quirk, nice colors, simple yet functional, and easily adds in aspects of his hobbies throughout the room.

Sero-

chill, vibes. good portrayal of his character; laid back and definitely separated from the other aesthetics/traits of the other characters. overall, nice.

Aoyama-

very flashy. kind of blinding. in character tho. lots of mirrors make sense to a- reflect the light & b- Aoyama takes care of his appearance. the knight armor is a little odd but goes with the french/royalty theme. pretty good tho.

Jiro- i may be biased bc i love her and her style, but i quite like her room. lots of checkers tho- kind of a lot but not overtly too much. nice colors, lots of instruments, very grungey. like the giant chalkboard too- im assuming that deep dope is a band- she wears a lot of their shirts so it would make sense. overall, super cool & extremely vibey.

Momo-

as she stated, momo's room is quite cramped. my question is why didnt she check measurements? she could pretty easily just make a tape measure. otherwise- v plush & v extravagant. very nice- would totally chill in there.

Tsu-

kind of out of character, but it gives her depth, which is nice- something not done very much for the female characters in this show. i feel like she'd like being in this cutesy, almost childish room to supplement her feeling of childhood. to elaborate- her parents work a lot, leaving her in charge of the two younger siblings, pushing her into a motherly/caring role for the two, probably at a youngish age, which would most likely make her own personality more of a childish type. okay, rampant analysis over, i like her room, very cute and nice.

Mina-

i do actually like her room! as we see in her hero costume, she likes more flashy, 80s fashion and patterns, somewhat akin to shows like Saved by the Bell. as much as an early 2010 justice fever dream this is, it does look like a mess, but it fits with her style, so i think its pretty good. very fluffy too tho. but yeah, very much older justice vibes- good tho.

last but not least, Uraraka-

not terribly interesting- it could use a bit of work, like a 13 poster or something. speaking of posters, nice astrology poster- al least im going to assume is a star map. otherwise, pretty good, could have a bit more tho.

thanks for reading my word vomit

This is definitely one of the delightful episodes in the whole My Hero Academia series. I loved how they have showcased each character’s personality in their respective rooms.

[notailtheories]

NotailsAndMore Tweet Compilation 2

Last Compilation | Next Compilation

This section will contain the tweets that I consider make up Act 2. Because they are not actually from O-1, you could also consider them an intermission... But they still hold important information either way. OwO

This batch of tweets began a little over an hour after the last round stopped... Which isn’t a very long pause. You can most easily tell the difference because this person’s face is “TvT” rather than “=)”, if you’re looking to track these from the Twitter itself... OwO

98 |

I passed out and I wake up to me being logged into this creepy ass notail fact account. Fuck off who did this? TvT

Reply to 8, & 99 |

hate to be a stickler for details but you didn't say a fact just a question tho i *would* like to know some notail facts about my dark past :D

Holy fuck. Look if you know me O-2 sir I just want you to know I did not make this account or tweeped at you, I just woke up to this. Who tweeps shit like this at an O-class? TvT

100, reply, & 102, reply, 108, reply, & 112 |

X-7364 if this was you and some of your shitty experiments I WILL strangle all of your dirty rats. These O classes could order my death for no reason. You even used my actual email to do this. They could figure out who I am! TvT

Your buddy even said "fuck you" to me. Now that guy's got some real claws. >:3 

I am so sorry O-6 sir. I had nothing to do with this but I will still apologize. Please forgive me, I'm ok if you don't forgive my friend and kill him though. TvT

Grovelling ain't pretty, you know. But hey, you ain't done anything, right? Maybe I'll let you go. >:3

You would be most kind if you let me go for words that were not my own. Thank you. TvT

I'll think about it. >:3

Thank you. That is all I ask, and all I am allowed to ask. TvT

Reply to 98, 101, reply, 109, reply, 113, reply, 114, reply, & 115, reply, 118, reply, 119, reply, 120, reply, 122, reply, 124, reply, 125, reply, & 126 |

lol u rly had me worried there sweetie :3 im still curious abt this whole thing if u want 2 help me find out abt it :3

I didn't write any of this! This has to be an X class prank. "Ha Ha, make your friend pass out, make an account with their email and possibly kill them by telling O-6 that you love them. So funny!" TvT

lmao u creeped out like every single o class tho i think thats kinda an achievement u should be proud of urself :3 whoever made this account was saying some really spooky stuff tho do u think it was just creepypasta or what :3

Please don't say I did it. I had nothing to do with this. I wouldn't contact the O classes, much less say such things to them, for they are most favorable to my survival. It was just some shitty prank. Some of the reactions are, strange, but that is no matter to me. TvT

watching u suck up 2 them is rly funny lol but kk babe i guess ill drop it :3 smh i thought this was something cool :3

I rather not relate "something cool" with angering the O classes but I understand. TvT

suckuuuuuuuup :3

I rather live a suck up than die for something I didn't do. TvT

how abt i give u smth else 2 suck on hot stuff :3

Look I don't even have a tweeper and I'm about to abandon this account and never touch it again. So my response to that is "um bye." TvT

i hate 2 see u leave but i love 2 watch u go :3

That's extremely holy and not ok. TvT

i hope ur not as disappointing in bed as ur friends failed arg was on tweeper :3

How could a notail raise so high to grace? TvT

u sure raise some things of mine baby :3

I would block you but I'm not going to be related to this account anymore, and if my friend logs back in I'm ok with him getting fucked over by your words. TvT

id prefer 4 u 2 to get fucked by me :3

Courtship between notails is not ok, but I suppose you know that. Just understand that "no." TvT

lol our society sux anyway i dont think its possible to pollute our gene pool more than its already fucked up babe :3

Ok well society gives me a roof over my head, food, and the time I got bit by a mallon I was experimenting on society fixed my arm before it rotted away. So we'll have to agree to disagree. TvT

lmao :3 the more u talk the more stupid and boring u seem :3

Says the notail who keeps going after clearly making me uncomfortable. But "sigh" I guess that's most people. TvT

ppl are funniest when theyre uncomfortable :3

Typical notail. You fit in just nicely. TvT

Original, 103, reply, & 105 |

@NotailsAndMore is it time for my 13 other facts?

Look it up yourself? Go read the Cosmosdex or something. I may be a K class but I'm not some fact machine. TvT

The what

Can you not look up basic and common terms? Geez look. http://cosmosdex.com/cosmosdex/ TvT

104, reply, & 107 |

X-7364 just walked in with coffee and called me a sleepy head. Said I passed out after intensely working on typing. Said I wouldn't respond to me when he had a question. He's lying, he knows he went overboard this time. TvT

You may want to improve your security. This could have ended very badly for you. :V

I will do what you recommended O-7 sir as you are most wise as all O classes are. I do have good security, I must have passed out so fast my computer didn't lock so my roommate and coworker decided to fuck with me. TvT

106, reply, 111, reply, & 117 |

I just checked the profile page to see if I could find some evidence of who did this. "i'm not sorry i told the truth when you didn't. no one deserves lies." The hell. If this is over lying about who ate the last pizza I'm going to be pissed. TvT

This went better for you than it could have mate, but I would recommend keeping closer guard over your belongings. Some of the other O-classes seem a bit agitated right now. uvu

Fully understood O-5, who kicks clockworks across the skies. I'll attempt to not pass out at my computer with my roommate around. TvT

The epithets aren't necessary mate. But maybe give your roommate a kick so they don't pull this again for good measure. uvu

I will make sure to give him a kick no matter how much he says he had nothing to do with this. Thank you for the advice O class. TvT

Original, & 110 |

@NotailsAndMore Once you figure out who did this, send me their ID number. Immediately. unu

I....think it's my roommate X-7364, but he's swearing the whole time this was going on I was working and refused to respond. I don't believe him but he sounds so serious about this. TvT

Reply to other party, & 116 |

Is there any way I can convince it to become a solid Yes? c:<

(Note: I won’t record this whole exchange because I don’t think it’s relevant... The context is O-8 is looking for who made this account. That’s all. OwO)

I know this is rude of me, and feel free to confirm this, but will you spare my roommate? He seems so honest in his pleads that he didn't do it.... He's the only one who could have done it, so it's him, but it seems like he regrets it deeply now. TvT

Original, 121, reply, 123, reply, & 127 |

I really am impressed by how many people they managed to unsettle in, what, an hour? uvu

Honestly as an X class he is naturally unsettling but I've never seen him act this badly. I wonder if I really ticked him off with the pizza thing. TvT

I've dealt with much worse than some X class...if it was just that then whatever...what does your friend know....OwO

I wish he would just admit it already. He said a few really odd things on this account and I have no idea where he's getting it from. Just. Fucking admit it X! Why is he being so rude to O classes you guys could KILL or BANISH us. TvT

It feels like something stranger is going on...OwO

It's just a stupid prank. A stupid prank that's now getting us basically evicted cause we can't stay here anymore. Stupid, stupid, prank. TvT

128, & 129 |

Ok this account is done. My roommate likely made this account as a laugh and somehow got the attention of the O classes. I'm sorry this happened even though I had nothing to do with it. I wish I could say my friend was sorry too but he's pissed off. TvT

Logging out, and never logging back in again. Yet again. Sorry for all the problems this account caused. Just unfollow this account. Bye. TvT

[ THIS ACCOUNT IS DEAD | Shitty prank by shitty roommate/friend who refuses to admit it | Will never be logging in ever again ]

Last Compilation | Next Compilation

[gotgifsandmusings]

GoT 7x03 Musings

My initial reaction to “The Queen’s Justice”

^I dub thee “Casterly Castle”

I guess the title refers to Cheryl finally delivering that poetic justice for Madison’s death via Poison Ivy lipstick (which I’ve been told was only a thing Ivy did in Batman and Robin; she’s usually just more a dramatic biochemist nerd with pheromones. I’m so sorry, Ivy.). I guess it could also be Deadpan not randomly giving Jon her help for nothing in exchange, because that’s actually a decent sense of justice. It was pretty obvious D&D were writing this one again, with the nonversations featuring strongly. Let’s dive in.

Dragonstone

A lot happened here, and yet nothing did at all.

Jon is a fucking idiot for arriving with just Davos, and it’s beyond clear that he should have listened to Sansa and everyone else cautioning him from going, because he was immediately in a position where he had no capacity to defend himself, and nothing to offer Deadpan at all.

Really glad Tyrion reminded us HOW NICE he is about not raping Sansa when they were married. More points for him being THE BEST. Sorry. If you know me, you know this one is a specific bugaboo.

Some say the dragon CGI didn’t look good, but frankly it didn’t bother me that much. I was much more distracted by Tyrion’s alcoholism jokes and Jon’s mouth breathing

The Mel & Davos scene felt like it worked last night, but after reading over Jess’s review today, I have no idea why I thought that. Mel was literally just saying she was peacing out, and then creepily said she and Varys would both die in Weisseroff, so I guess they will. It was…fine? But also “the plot needs me over here now!”

I felt like Deadpan and Jonny were asserting different things every few minutes. I’m also assuming we’re supposed to view Deadpan as the spoiled entitled shittier leader, while Jonny is a man of the people who drops his g’s at the ends of his sentences.

this would have been somewhat possible to be sold if Jonny hadn’t been given a kingship for being the world’s biggest fucking idiot

Also, Tyrion’s point about “you should just kneel if this war to the North is all that matters to you” is really, really salient. Like…what did Jonny expect in this? He *said* Deadpan needs him, but actually how? What she needs his 4 surviving Wildlings? The Manderly forces?

Oh wait, that’s right, the whole theme of this season has been “how can we illogically deplete Deadpan’s massive and unbeatable army?” She learns about Yara’s fleet and decides not to keep Jonny as a prisoner, but a guest, before storming off.

I’m probably remembering this out of order, but we get some kind of war council scene where she suggests riding her dragon to like…BURN Euron’s wormhole-navigating fleet?

But no. Apparently she could get shot with an arrow so it’s never going to happen. Let’s ignore her biggest military advantage.

We also get Jonny & Tyrion 2.0: who broods best? Aka D&D write shitty lines for cheap fandom jokes.

It is kind of amusing to watch Jonny have his own idiocy pointed out to him

Then Tyrion runs to Deadpan and tells her to play nice, because she’s been a very naughty little school girl lately. Also they need allies because things are going tits up with his masterplan of incompetence. I just can’t take the fucking infantilizing tone, though I did legit laugh when Deadpan called him on “a wise ma n once said.”

Uhhh finally Deadpan & Jonny’s 2.0 scene? She decides to let him mine dragon glass because Tyrion asked nicely. I can’t think anything positively about either of their leadership capabilities, nor do I think D&D have much interest in showing them. Can we just get on to boat sex already?

Cheryl’s Landing

The biggest issue I have is how the smallfolk of Cheryl’s Landing are even more mercurial than the Northern Lords. Now they’re CHEERING Euron despite knowing Cheryl burned everything down? Why don’t they give any shits?

I don’t know who Euron is playing this week. Moriarity? Julia says a bad magician. Are we supposed to find him intimidating?

Legit found Cheryl’s approach to governance compelling this week. She secured an ally with a promise of marriage *after* the war is won (why the fuck is Euron so interested in this?), and was a savvy negotiator with the “we love the slave trade” Iron Bank of Braavos.

I can’t begin to deal with the Faullaria death scene. Longest fucking thing in the world, and it was just D&D reveling in murdering characters we hated because they put no depth into them. Everything about it was horrible, absolutely everything.

even the stupid “poetic justice” of the kiss. Just stop.

Larry loves Cheryl! Cheryl’s maid loves Cheryl’s style! What in the fuck is happening??

Winterhell

BRITTANY’S BACK

Anonymous said to gotgifsandmusings:

"a female character is empowered without resorting to violence, sexual manipulation, or dismissal of typically feminine-coded traits or activities" happened tho, with Sansa's ruling scene. It was one of the scenes I really enjoyed this episode (until littlefinger started to talk)

Yeah man, for sure. It was actually nice to watch, even if the larger pattern of their conception of empowerment is totally fucked. I have a feeling this one won’t be staying around

Also my god, that Batfinger speech was one of his worst yet. It makes chaos is a ladder seem like the smartest thing ever uttered. “See all possible outcomes”? Um…you didn’t, you fucking moron. Remember when the Sansa Marriage Strike blew up in literally everyone’s face?

at least Brittany wasn’t into it

Aaaaand then Bran came with a brand new personality! He wasn’t able to emote or give any shits about his sister, and then forced her to relive her trauma by talking about it in really creepy, deadpan, voyeuristic tones. Yay!

this Bran came out of NOWHERE. He became the Three Eyed Sydow last year (or something), so…where was this creepiness then? He seemed to be able to engage with Meera and Benjen and stuff. Was the baby crossfade THAT momentous?

I’m glad Brittany ran away from him. I rather stanned her this episode

Oh btw Theon is alive.

Apparently the Ironboors who survived can intuit exactly what happened on his ship, rather than thinking he got thrown overboard or something.

Hogwarts

I almost forgot this was in the episode

Greyscale is cured! Forever! This plot really mattered so much!

no are we supposed to be affected that Jorah was contemplating suicide? Are we supposed to care that Sam figured this out from what Jess described as a “wiki-how”?

just someone kick Sam out already. This is going nowhere

THE BATTLES

I’ll direct you back to Jess’s review if you haven’t read it already. She does an AMAZING job at explaining how Tyrion’s voice-over removed all dramatic tension.

Fuck traveling logistics, amirite? Of course Larry can sprint around Weisseroff in two weeks. I feel like they threw that timeframe in there just to piss us off.

Again, the importance of Casterly Castle was never in evidence. Larry didn’t care about it enough to abandon it. Tyrion described it as “impenetrable” and even went on to say how once inside, the Unsullied would *still* be outnumbered.

it makes Tyrion seem like an idiot, especially with Larry knowing he’d take it, so was this supposed to be his hubris? But it was never framed as hubris. So…

Oh look, Euron’s fleet warped from somewhere in between Cheryl’s Landing and Porne to Casterly Castle. That works!

Then Larry just warps and takes Highgarden off-screen, because apparently D&D say that the Tyrells are shitty fighters. What. No seriously, what? Where did that even come from? And taking a castle is still kind of a big deal.

^this was a tad disappointing for Highgarden.

Frankly, where did the Tyrell army even go? Tarly’s an important bannerman, but not like ALL of it

The best part was that Diana Rigg seemed as happy to be done with this stupid show as I was for her, so there was a good amount of energy in her scene.

the whole “Cheryl is the worst” thing didn’t land as usual, especially when immediately followed by her confession about murdering Joffrey, but she was just so gosh darn plucky about it!

Aaaand that’s all I’ve got! Boy Deadpan sure is in a pickle that her amazing “divide and fail to conquer” plan was as bad as @turtle-paced described it last week. Add to that Larry’s sudden competence, and she just might yet need Jonny!

Top 3 nitpicks:

Casterly Castle being single-handedly built by Tywin and Tyrion having actually constructed the sewers himself. Not just running them…constructed them.

The Iron Bank investing in the slave trade

The smallfolk LOVE Euron and Cheryl now

Did this land for you? I was seeing tweets about how smart the writing was and just...WHAT. Though Brittany was boss ass, if I may say so myself.

[miyaameow]

Request! The RFA + V and Saeran accidentally slapping/punching MC while they are having a fight!! Love your writing

ahh thank you so much and sorry for the delay!! I hope you like this~~

P.S. shameless self-promotion: I wrote a headcanon not so similar to this called Fight Me, where MC defends the RFA and stuff so take a look if you’re interested :D

first of all, let’s all say a prayer for MC’s reaction in all these scenarios:

“excuse me?”

Yoosung: 

NUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

“I’M SORRY MC I;M SO SORRY PLS FORGIVE ME”

he’s so scared like shitshitshittt

this is why his mom told him to NEVER GET INTO FIGHTS

his clumsy ass doesn’t even know who tf he’s aiming at and he’S TRYNA FIGHT

WHO AM I FIGHTING AGAIN????

he can’t even say “fight me” louder than mouse tho 

how did he even get in a fight in the first place

oh

it was because someone bought the last ice cream bar at the convenience store

and he stuck out his tongue at that person

who then proceeded to stomp on Yoosung’s foot

so then he flinched and hit MC

also did i mention this “person” is

… 7 yrs old

Zen:

WHO’S THIS MOFO ATTACKING ME FROM BEHIND-

OH CRAP IT WAS MC

instantly drops?? the guy he had a headlock on and runs to MC’s “rescue”

is he rescuing MC from his own hit or what

so MC’s over there like rubbing her side because he ELBOWED her

and he’s just like “OMG PRINCESS R U OK” “I DIDN’T MEAN TO HIT YOU”

also you know those shows where it’s like the person is talking to someone but then is also being attacked from behind??

yea so that’s happening and he’s fending off those people while apologizing

“Zen can we just go”

ZEN THE KNIGHT mode activated

he’s turned into some Optimus Prime shit

bridal carries MC away and he actually looks bulletproof

Jaehee:

Jaehee was having a cat fight with some chick at the bar

y’know normally she was chill right

but GURL THIS TIME SHE COULDN’T HOLD BACK

so she was over there doin taekwondo moves with heels on

and MC was just like this is real bad

so she tries to intervene but ends up getting flipped instead

“OWWWW” her back was stinging

“OMG MC!! WHAT DID I DO?!”

now she was back to normal Jaehee and started to do some emergency procedures 

“I must begin a head-to-toe examination, please tell me if anything hurts”

“Jaehee…”

“I’m going to start with your head, don’t move”

“Jaehee.”

“Do you feel pain here?” 

“JAEHEE STOP PRESSING INTO MY SCALP”

at this point MC is so embarrassed she pulls Jaehee out of the bar with the speed of light

hazukashiidesu (〃´ﾉω`〃)

Jumin:

he didn’t even notice until TWO HOURS AFTER THE FACT

yes that’s how oblivious Mr. Corporate Heir is

“MC, what is that bruise on your arm?”

MC’s friendly reminder face:

ohhhh

“I apologize, I shall call my personal doctor immediately.”

“JUmin, it’s the miDDLE OF THE NIGHT”

“Your point?”

HOW MUCH MORE DENSE CAN HE GET AHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

so he makes up for it!

“MC, I’m sorry, I’ll make up for it.”

BOI BETTER WEAR KITTY EARS FOR THE NIGHT YASSSSSSS

;)

707: 

lol shit

oh no actually SHIT

now he doesn’t know what to do liek

MC’s got tears in her eyes because he kicked her in the shin

“01110000 01101100 01100101 01100001 01110011 01100101 00100000 01101000 01100001 01110110 01100101 00100000 01100011 01101000 01100101 01100101 01110011 01100101 00100000 01110000 01101001 01111010 01111010 01100001″

“Seven, I don’t speak binary”

“AJAJAJAJAJA sorry MC”

so he begins to make silly faces to make her laugh which only makes it worse because MC laughs so hard she bumps her shin INTO SOMETHING ELSE

“OUCH!!1!”

oopsie

“Here, sit on this pile of honey buddha chips it’ll make you feel better”

-_-

Saeran: 

no bb

he was fighting because some guys tried hit her up and he was not going to take any of that BS

“HEY BRO YOU WANNA GO?!”

right so they’re fighting fighting fighting… what else is new

AND THEN BAM

MC gets hurt

how???

well, ya boy Saeran went a little overboard and ended up moving too close to MC and so when he flung at the dude he ended up smacking MC instead

oh no

this bb suddenly loses all his strength and power and he’s just staggering backwards because he hurt someone he loves :(

“MC! MC! PLEASE BE OKAY I DIDN’T MEAN TO HURT YOU!”

he was shaking her so violently she thought her head would fall off

“It’s okay, let’s get out of here”

CINNAMON BUN piggy-back-rides MC home apologizing non-stop

V:

V doesn’t fight period.

ALL RIGHT GUYS THANKS FOR READING THAT’S IT FOR V-

…

fine.

just beCAUSE HE’S A PEACEMAKER doesn’t mean this man doesn’t get angry

um but he can’t see???

SHHHH

anyway so he’s like tryna get this guy to back the f up

throwing punches and slaps in every direction possible but suddenly he feels something soft and squishy

was that MC’s … cheek?

y’all nasty if you thought he hit her t…

“AH!”

omg no it really was her!

so he’s super sorry like bb don’t cry you weren’t even the one who got hit

but he’s so apologetic he literally swears that he’s never going to fight again like

“MC pls forgive my horrible heart and soul”

it’s not like you gotta but i suggest you translate Seven’s binary numbers

~Cherry L.

Masterpost: click here

Askbox/Requests: click here

[severalbakuras]

guess who watched a little more voltron. apologies to mobile users if readmores don’t work. spoilers for episodes 5-8 of voltron. (as always please don’t send me spoilers for later on. even if i’m wrong)(oh and mild night in the woods+utena spoilers, i guess)

episode 5: they’re all such dipshit brats goddamn. hunk is #relatable but ngl keith swooping in like that felt a lil ooc unless he’s still feeling annoyed at lance from the earlier freakout about the blue lion. then he’s #relatable too i know the feeling of professional Salt.

allura’s got a great spike spiegel/space dandy sense of improvisation when it comes to piloting.

pidge is now the most #relatable bc holy shit fuck the slipperies.

oh my god hunk you just solved my stealth voltron/night in the woods au idea - v. kind and stress bakes = angus for sure. (now who is gregg i mean i know who i ship with hunk (keith and shay (and ot3, hunk has two hands)) but they’re both a little too mellow to be gregg in his up mood swings. like lance probably fits the bill best but then i have no one to be mae. keith might make a good bea? hrmmmmm.)

(i’m kinda leaning towards shiro as selmers ngl, even if she isn’t a ‘main’ character. she explicitly states that she’s seeking therapy and it’s working out for her and it’d be nice if shiro could get the same at some point. plus i think shiro would write poems like

My heart is A dankness But when I see you I feel a thankness When I feel A blueness All I need Is a youness

bc he’s a cheesy dorky guy. maybe some night he will catch that bus out to the west coast.)

(zarkon is either that asshole steve scriggins or eide because he’s not competent enough to be anyone else of consequence)

(allura is either the nice pastor or lori m. pastor bc she has to project the image of a strong leader at all times even if she’s questioning herself/her faith, lori m because she’s kinda haunted by death and i can sorta see her being the local quiet weirdo with a ton to say if you just talk to her)

(holy shit that’s a lot of words for an au for a series that hasn’t even finished yet so sorry)

so uh anyway this is the episode that launched keith/lance right? right. who the fuck builds an elevator without a service/evacuation ladder. im reporting that thing to osha and the elevator repair aliens union.

THAT’S HAGGARS VOICE. SHE’S TEACHING PIDGE ALTEAN. MY CIVIL WAR THEORY...

i mean i know they probably just recycled her va but

wow zarkon’s actually slightly competent for once. probably haggar’s doing.

that storm looks fucking badass.

aww allura ;A; then again they’ve only just started doing this tracking thing with this much intensity this season so like that can’t be the case. unless zarkon only just now realized he had allura’s dna/life essence on record (C.I.V.I.L W.A.R) and he could use them to track her down with. which i can totally believe. 

honestly the fact that the galmorans galrans. tf ulaz you’re screwing me up from the grave. even have a functioning space ship at all is probably despite zarkon, not because of.

she’s real sad she doesn’t get to kill allura. almost as if her death is to haggar as obtaining the black lion is to zarkon. hmm.

coran really embodies the nihilist millennial spirit. we’re probably gonna die anyway so why not.

episode 6: !!! i was wondering if we’d get someone like jim cummings show up. weird i thought he was more disney than dreamworks. also i love the organic/inorganic mix those are some cool aliens goddamn.

who’s this fucking loser on a hoverboard. he hasn’t even got a fraction of eyebrow guy’s charisma or charm.

it’s that dagger keith has huh. calling it now. he was way too flustered to be lying about it having something to do with him and since when does he hide like. anything. from shiro.

red lion is watching you TOTALLY GET CALLED. christ i’m nailing a lot of stuff about keith it’s making me v. positive about my civil war theory.

you self sacrificing dorks.

aww keith. i mean allura def. has a very strong point but aww.

morvok makes zarkon look intimidating and that is no mean feat.

oh yeah there’s some evangelion style pilot/robot synergy going on with how much effort hunk has to put into lifting things. like linked life energies. here’s hoping we don’t have an asuka vs the eva series moment that would be nastyyy.

honestly i was not expecting anything like allura and keith’s chat to appear in an action cartoon like it’s pure character interaction and dialogue about a legit difficult subject with two people who clearly care about and respect each other but both have justified differing opinions.

AAHH PIDGE THAT WAS THE WORST POSSIBLE BOOST

THIS IS A NIGHTMARE SCENARIO AAAAAAA

so the hub is the cushy spot for high ranking generals or something. sounds like the military police in aot.

that 360 tracking shot on lance was siiiiiick.

ugh you are not funny enough for those sound effects commander.

THIS IS YOUR MOMENT CORAN

red lion i love you

OH SHIT NEW HUNK POWER

this dude is suffering the same ‘destroy the lions!!’ thing as a lot of the galrans seem to have. like. don’t you lot want voltron? doesn’t zarkon want the black lion? dissolving them in acid is literally the worst possible way to fulfilling those orders.

lance have you been thinking about if keith and allura hooked up the whole time? can’t tell if salty or thirsty.

someone please throw that commander dude overboard. i feel infinitely worse for all the galran mooks now.

don’t tease me show don’t give me a blast that big

tell me that wasn’t his escape pod. ughghhghghghghhghghghhgh

more lol hunk food jokes. ughhhghg.

‘tracking through the black lion’ can’t fool me with that red herring m8. if he had that connection with the black lion he could’ve found shiro on that scavenger’s planet before keith could. 

episode 7: space spirates is the coolest fucking concept give me space piratES GIVE ME. SPAC. E PIRAT. ES

coren don’t be space racist towards oonaloos.

sparkly allura YES ALLURA GETS TO CHILL TODAY YESSS.

shame about shiro tho black lion’s like nah bitch we’re having a bonding exercise.

the space mall is the space dandy-est thing i’ve seen in this show. i want a crossover i want them to witness Viva All

it would be the dumbest shit

oh god they’re dressed like rpg characters which makes me think of a skyrim au which makes me think of my yugioh skyrim au which makes me wonder if i can combine the two. 

coran’s sasuke shirt is Uncomfortable.

i love this galran mall dude. varkon mall cop.

the civil war theory isn’t dead the lions could’ve been built afterwards or just not activated prior to reaching ‘home’. or black lion believes in home being where the heart is and not your place of birth.

more food jokes for hunk hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

they nailed the informercial salesguy voice on this guy.

keith would be naive enough to give a shady sales dude a treasure knife huh.

ok keith winning a knife fight like that DOES give me gregg vibes. a little. i guess we’ve never seen keith in a manic ‘up’ phase, just a progressively worse or better ‘down’ phase.

OH FUCK HE REALLY IS VARKON MALL COP. THE MEMES HAVE ASCENDED.

civil war theory... isn’t dead... hhh

ok ok ok so like maybe a mutation caused by direct contact with quintessence wasn’t controversial for a while. like you’re manipulating the planet’s essence of course you’ll look a little funky as a result and there’s not much difference between harvesting a little life essence and harvesting a crop.

the split comes from zarkon wanting to use the black lion/voltron and quintessence for war while king allura’s dad does not. zarkon takes his loyal team and superjacks them with quintessence essentially reshaping their bodies entirely, along with any alteans who are like ‘yeah no maybe war is what we need’. and this mutation is passed down genetically creating the galran race as we know it. and there’s probably some cloning going on too idk this is a semi-sci-fi show there’s gonna be clones at some point.

ok?

ok.

pidge. u nerd.

more of the oonaloo girl pls i love her.

ok i can get behind master chef hunk jokes

god everyone else is having a nice time and as usual shiro is trapped in a nightmare and also as usual he’s probably not going to breath one word about it to his crew (late edit: I WAS RIGHT).

galran cook man is cool with me can he join the crew.

i swear to god the black lion and shiro and zarkon confrontation is basically the same as the plot of utena???? shiro is utena. zarkon is akio. black lion is anthy.

otoh that doesn’t bode well for shiro so uh.

moving on

pidge and lance don’t get to hang out enough.

he take sthe cow. lance. laaaaance

this episode is ridiculous i love it. so space dandy.

varkon i love you.

allura your hair is so cute.

pidge and lance are officially NERDS

episode eight: ok so in like the first ten seconds and the first shot of the whole team and i’m getting alarm bells. keith is far away from everyone. there’s a pillar directly between him and everyone else.

keith.

keith my boy what’s gonna happen.

hhh hunk has definitely gotten a downgrade this sea-LANCE YOU RUDE LITTLE FUCK. like no offense if you like lance but i kinda. don’t. like he’s not nearly as endearing as lars from SU is even if their characters are pretty similar and i love lars.

hopefully he gets some nice moments soon bc i haven’t warmed up to him anywhere near as much as i thought i would. his best moments have been him hanging out with pidge tbh.

keith that is Incriminating anger there

HAGGAR’S VOICE AGAIN I’M TELLING YOU - wait no this definitely HAS to be recycling or else she’s covertly controlling the balmora. unless they had like a vocaloid system in altean times and didn’t realize they were using haggar’s voice and by the time they did it was too awkward to change.

shiro don’t make hints like that it makes me think you’re gonna die and I’d Rather You Did Not.

“if you’re going to be a leader you’ve got to repress the shit out of your ptsd” shiro. plz.

who decided to make the red lion look like it was hacking up a hairball to drop them off. good choice

oh shit haggar.

interesting they DON’T want the paladins around.

shiro’s face ahhhhh

so. keith might not be a galran who forgot he was a galran. i imagine the blade of malmora would keep close tabs on who has a knife and who lost them and they’d know if one of their own was lost on earth relatively recently surely.

holy shit this animation upgrade a++++++++

i mean shit considering he’s a teenage boy who’s up against assassins who’ve been fighting and training for millenia keith still does a damn good job defending himself.

otoh considering they’re assassins who’ve been fighting and training for millennia they must be wearing some major kid gloves. or they genuinely do want him to succeed, but want him to earn it first.

oh shit haggar wants a word with traitor dude this won’t end well

YAS KEITH

NO KEITH

KEITH ;A;

so keith’s dad is human, at least. oh jesus his voice cracking at ‘of course i do’

so his mother is galran, making him half-galran, which he has to have known all along bc otherwise the suit wouldn’t project it right? i am distressed that this actually

increases

the chances of haggar being his mother. agghg. AGHGHGHHGHG I WAS... JOKING... BEFORE................

KEITH ;___________________;

thace is going to dead-ass lie to haggar i love this guy.

RED LION GIVES NO FUCKS WOULD DEVOUR PLANETS TO SAVE HER HUMAN THIS MAY OR MAY NOT BE A BAD THING

Moral Choice Knife says to stay in drugs and don’t do school. i bet Moral Choice Knife would be friends with my shadow priest’s baeblade.

yknow if it had a consciousness.

ah fuck allura’s not going to like this when/if she finds out. could be a season 3 plot?

there’s like 13 episodes total in this season right? seems like we’re ramping up for the final arc so i’ll stop here ♥

edit: fuck me tumblr squished everything together at the end there.