#dickbiter tag

[piplicious]

I like ur theme!! Also ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

thank you😎😎😎 also SIGH. birdy i love you but even if someone were to produce milk on this blog (idk shit happens ig) i dont think itd be damien. youre the doctor here you must know better than anyone else that the conditions for lactation are simply not met ❌

HIS DAD ON THE OTHER HAND,

(thats what i think you meant judging by the timing of ur ask)

[piplicious]

no you cant have my gay little hammer go buy ur own gay little hammer

"It's always good to experiment with your hobbies :)"

I say as I strap u down to a wobbly table and show u my pink plastic shanks

pssst @piplicious can I borrow ur gay lil hammer?

[oldboyjensrps]

CHARACTER INTERVIEW

Tagged by: @donnez-moi-vos-vivres

Tagging: @misspauling @rcdpyro @bushcamping @pissfirstaskquestionslater  @liltf2blog (for whoever you’d like)   And anyone I missed who hasn’t already done it!

BASICS  !

NAME . Barbara Jared, The Messenger,  NICKNAME . *cracks knuckles: the ones highlighted are specific to Mercsenger*- Babs, Barb, Barbs, Barbed-Wire, Bar-none, Barbie (Only by one specific person otherwise you’re on her shitlist), Pet (again specific use or you get a fork in the eye), Pidge, Pidgey, Pigeon, Possum, Taube, Doo, Looney, Laska, Messy, Mess, Mailman, babyface (if you want to get smacked), dickbiter, wildcard, badger, puppet (don’t), Barbarino (DEFO DO NOT) AGE .  32 @ 1972  SPECIES . Human

PERSONAL  !

MORALITY .  lawful / chaotic / Good / neutral / evil / true .-It varies. RELIGION .  Raised Methodist. Now more loosely deistic but still has a very strict moral code she only holds herself to. (Mercsenger is more chaotic because she’s dead convinced she’s going to Hell) SINS .  greed / gluttony / sloth / lust / pride / envy / wrath . VIRTUES .  chastity / charity / diligence / humility / kindness / patience /  KNOWN LANGUAGES . English, Spanish, Russian (Mercsenger has a more solid hold on this one), Moderately okay with various Indigenous languages SECRETS . Other people’s secrets, some key intel, Her actual jobs- to most of her family, the fact that she has multiple actual jobs and lives in New Mexico as a somewhat accomplishedish author along with either being merc or messenger ie her entire life past age 21- To her dad who thinks she’s been a temp in LA for 11 years, her name (to the mercs), her cover job as one of Hale’s receptionists which is like a really poorly kept secret, everything else about herself she’s real fucking open about

PHYSICAL  !

BUILD .  scrawny / bony / slender / fit / athletic / curvy / herculean / pudgy / average . HEIGHT . 5′4″

SCARS  /  BIRTHMARKS . Prime: Huge array of scarring on both sides of her right shoulder from a wound and consequent surgeries, beauty mark/mole on her right cheek, some minor facial scars, various minor scars on her back and chest from hostage situations, freckles

Mercsenger: beauty mark/mole on her right cheek, burn/ branding scars on her chest, electric scars on chest and stomach, scar on chin, some minor re-spawn remainders, freckles.

ABILITIES  /  POWERS . Prime: Extreme durability/resistance from melee/blunt attacks-via physician + genetics, high pain tolerance, natural anxious energy and unnasuming nature that means she’s underestimated and looked past because her fear and venerability aren’t an act and it shows, acting skills, can talk to some animals but only long ones- eels, worms, caterpillars, snakes, ferrets etc, trained to pass out after certain pain/stress thresh-hold to make intel gathering harder (flight), power of unpredictability and using her environment in weird ways

Mercsenger:  natural anxious energy and unnasuming nature that means she’s underestimated and looked past/ not seen as a threat because her fear and venerability aren’t an act and it shows, acting skills, can talk to some animals but only long ones- eels, worms, caterpillars, snakes, ferrets etc, after a certain threshold/amount of damage while in or when switching to melee she becomes a hell of a lot more dangerous and her attack power increases like a cornered animal (fight),  power of unpredictability and creative combat strategies such as she can,will, and has bitten off fingers tactically. Oh yeah and she has implants in her brain that allow Admin to access her sensory organs-to hear or see shit and talk to the mercs-and occasionally fully possess her. Yay. RESTRICTIONS . Severe anxiety and self doubt, desperate need but refusal to openly seek validation, inferiority complex a mile wide, a pushover if she wants to trust you, drive to be useful and please people often results in ignoring her own health and wellbeing, prone to panic attacks, a slower processing speed and social/learning issues related to her NLD, ADHD, executive dysfunction if it has to do with herself, physically weak and the most squishy member of her team, RECKLESS at the worst/best moments, emotional and prone to pausing to assess options in a morally compromising situation (which is like, all of her situations)

FAVORITES !

FOOD

. This one specific pasta dish her mom used to make

DRINK

.  Mildly sweet iced tea, hot chocolate, peach sangria

PIZZA TOPPING

. J-just one? Only one? Hhhh.... Hhh??? hhhh... ChEEsE?? 

COLOR

. Orange

MUSIC GENRE

. Things fun to sing and belt, more into individual songs than genres or artists, some showtunes

BOOK GENRE

. fantasy, adventure, girls having adventures, women being rad

MOVIE GENRE

. Musicals, 

CURSE WORD . FUCK, or rapscallion, or dingus, or chucklehead but FUCK is the one true best to say.

SCENTS

. Almonds, library stacks, right before or right after rain, mountain lakeside, summer evening, when it smells and feels like snow, cinnamon buns, pumpkin

FUN STUFF  !

BOTTOM OR TOP . Bottom. Unless she’s like energetic for some reason but also no. She’s fucking lazy. SINGS IN THE SHOWER . Sings in the shower, sings in the bathroom outside the shower, sings about showers, sings in rain showers, sings whenever she wants it’s just fun to do LIKES PUNS . Absolutely. 

[piplicious]

Give me ur gay little hammer this is NOT a request

indeed to me it is not a request but a trade offer. you see, my gay little tools are very important to me. but i will temporarily lend you my gay little hammer if you doodle me a pip >:-) if no then ig no deal then :/

[piplicious]

What is he looking at

judging from what i know about your sketchbook and its contents probably a penice or perhaps a Balls

[piplicious]

...thats fair that pip drawing was rlly worth it i don't mind being killed with a hammer thank you😌👍

I FINALLY GOT IT FUCKERS, PREPARE YOUR ORGANS AND ASSHOLES IM ABOUT TO GO ON A RAMPAGE!!!

@piplicious you’re gonna have so many regrets <3

[piplicious]

wait a minute…

am I… #dipbiter??? 🥺🥺🥺

yesss it all started when i gave my friend personal tag #dickbiter tag because she bit the penice once when giving head so now its a reoccuring pattern. everyone has so bite something. you're the CEO of dip so you have to bite the dip ☝️

[piplicious]

sorry i had goku mode parental vision on

actually i take back my words about being a bad parent because once I had a dream i was pip's parent and we had to flee from the country together but it was very late at night and he fainted from exhaustion on his way and i had to carry him togethrr with the bags but it wasnt a stress dream or a nightmare bc the whole border check queue thing i w

[piplicious]

you covered my beautiful profile pipture ......... slut

OKAY @piplicious COMING FOR MY THROAT???? HELP????

[piplicious]

oh no no no this is a misunderstanding. the only one who can lose in a war between a girl and an antichrist is pip

i don't have the sims and i dont think my laptop would be able to handle it anyway so im going to play the free version inside my head ill keep you guys updated