#dick2bomb

[shortpplfedup]

Only Friends Character Rankings Episode 3

Man Jojo, Ninew, Ninepinta and Vivienne know exactly how to build a mess because this was OUTSTANDING. Here's how the pimps and hoes are stacking up this week.

🔺1. Boston (3)

Damn! Tilly Birds should write a song about you.

THIS NASTY SHITBAG MOTHERFUCKER YAAASSSSSS KWEEEEN! Boston spent the entire episode mansplaining, manipulating and manwhoring and considering that is what this whole show is even about he fucking wins the week! Stringing Nick along, spewing poison into Top's and Ray's ears, fucking Top nasty in a classic automobile...I don't care what any of you say, he's the winner.

🔻2. Ray (1)

Don’t define it. Just enjoy your life. You said you could differentiate between love and lust.

This dizzy bitch. This messy mess-ass hoe. Playing with everybody's feelings because he can never face up to his own and just fucking deal with his shit. Everybody is correctly fed up of his bullshit, including Sand and Sand LITERALLY JUST MET HIM. Sand telling him to save his money for a shrink was the best advice any character has ever given any other character on any show anywhere.

🔺3. Nick (5)

Can friends with benefits turn into lovers?

Well the boy is dumb but he's not dumb if you know what I mean. Boston is screwing with his head and he knows it, but he just can't help himself cuz dick2bomb. They say you should never actually get your crush, and this is why. Nick being a sneaky surveillance spy bitch is the main reason Boston should've never messed with him, because now he's gonna go NSA on his ass. He wants that man and he will have him, whatever it takes.

🔹4. Sand (4)

If you want a boyfriend, get yourself a boyfriend. Don't mess with me.

SAND YOU KNOW BETTER! YOU KNOW THIS MAN IS A MESS! AND YET YOU ARE STILL FALLING FOR HIS CHARM. Sand giggling and twirling his hair with Ray in the car was...it was embarrassing. I'm embarrassed for you sir. Sack the fuck up. Like when you threw Top the middle finger, more of that. Also, what the fuck happened between those two TELL ME JOJO!

⭐5. Yo

Sweet as sugar, hard as ice. Hurt me once, I'll kill you twice. Haven’t you heard?

We have our first sighting of Yo in the rankings! Homegirl clearly has all her shit together: a thriving business, a hot and devoted younger man, and a house full of kids who stay drinking her dranks and eating her food because they can't get their shit together. And she looks like a bag of money THE ENTIRE TIME, just FLAWLESS. More of her please.

🔺6. Top (7)

♪ I’m a villain, no matter how much I love you, I must die eventually ♪

So he totally planted that guy at the silent disco right? Seemed like a weird play to push Mew along. Because at 3 months, the game's probably gotten a bit boring, especially if Mew's not even giving him the occasional sniff at it to keep him on the hook. Top likes a challenge and he sorta likes Mew, but if Mew really did screw Ray, maybe he's not so interested anymore. To be clear: I absolutely do not think Top is jealous, more like the shine wears off Mew for him if Mew has succumbed before. I still don't trust a thing coming out of this man's mouth, but the way he worked Boston OUT in that car is worth at least a one-rank jump.

🔻7. Mew (2)

-Are you drunk and taking advantage of me? -Don’t you like it though?

Mew is this week's biggest loser, falling the furthest from last week as his shtick starts wearing thin. Mew's overplayed his hand a bit here: his testing of Top has gone on too long. He doesn't even dispute Top calling him his boyfriend even as he insists they're not dating yet. He was totally about to give it up after the party because I think he realised he had gone from a challenge to a bore, but he waited too late, Boston had a chance to get into everybody's head and now it's all fucked. When he finally sleeps with Top next week it's not a victory for him, it's a capitulation. Also, WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED WITH HIM AND RAY I NEED TO KNOW LIKE RIGHT NOW I CAN'T WAIT A WHOLE WEEK!

🔻8. Cheum/April (6)

Guys, I think I’m gonna throw a pool party.

Poor Cheum, the only person to remember they are in fact trying to run a fucking business and actually working at the pool party rather than causing and/or engaging in drama, and April right by her side just helping her woman out because her so-called friends are a dumpster fire. As usual, the lesbians gotta be the ones getting shit done.

[callmetippytumbles]

tagged by @gardenoblues

Rules: Post the names of all the files in your WIP folder, regardless of how non-descriptive or ridiculous. Let people send you an ask with the title that most intrigues them, and then post a little snippet or tell them something about it! Then tag as many people as you have WIPs.

Tagging: @therulerofallpotatos @realmermaid333 @the-strangest-person @suchaladyy @wincestation

WARNING: THERE MIGHT BE SMUT YOU WOULDN'T WANT TO CAST YOUR EYES ON.

Random WIPs

Wyler YOU-Cursed Yarn Store

This is fic that is kind of combining a prompt about a cursed yarn store I saw on the discord. I started to combine it with another fic I have been thinking about that has elements of YOU. I think having Tyler be an obsessive stalker and a hyde being at the root of the murders would add interesting characterization for Tyler within this prompt. This is an everyone is all grown up adult AU. This is just an outline right now. No actual fic for this exists yet.

YOU - Wyler AU Outline

Yep its the outline for a YOU fic I was thinking of but no cursed yarn store. I did an outline to get it out of my system but I don't think this one will ever come to pass since the outline is very much a shoehorn Wednesday's characters into YOU character archetypes and storylines which didn't feel right. Some aspects of this may make it into the Cursed Yarn Store story but this project on its own will probably not be developed further. I like taking some of the themes of YOU like stalking, obession etc and exploring those but I don't want to force the stories together more than that.

Wyler Nocturne ExFiles AU Outline

Kind of what it says on the tin. This is the outline for a fic idea that is a mix of a video game called Nocturne and The Ex Files. It's basically an AU where an adult Wednesday gets recruited to work for a clandestine department of the CIA that specifically investigates crimes and bizarre occurances that involve outcasts and the supernatural. Tyler is also recruited to this unit. Of course they are made to be partners and they have to investigate cases together. Hilarity ensues. It obviously takes aspects of the Mulder/Scully relationship as well as the supernatural elements from The Ex Files and Nocturne. The fic will have a kind of episodic format where every 4-5 chapters make up 1 episode. There are 4-5 episodes total and 1 fic (with all of the chapters) is equal to one season. This is also still a outline. I have a lot more research to do before I can even think of starting to write anything more. If you are going to put Ex Files as an influence of your fic, a show that is a big influence on shipping culture in general let alone the actual Mulder/Scully ship itself; I feel like there are certain notes that you have hit to get that influence right. Since my understanding of the relationship aspect is so distant for me, I have to study up. If I can get my shit together, this really could be a fun one.

Dick2Bomb Wyler hate sex fic

Kind of started as a drabble inspired by some quotes on the discord server. Kind of is a one off set in same world as the Nocturne/Exfiles fic. Was supposed to just get the smut out of my system for this fic while everything else came together, but didn't get too far in the scene. This is kinda in limbo.

Some - Tyclay One Shot

If I could work out the smut for this one, this is almost done. This is actually a what if scenario where I kind of play with the idea what would happen if Bianca and Tyler were to interact more in that scene where Bianca gets Wednesday's snood in the Weathervane. Like what would happen if they were more flirty. I really wanted an excuse to write more for Bianca and kind of let her exist as a central romantic protagonist paired with someone who can truly see her.

Yours, Mine and Ours

A Wyclay fic that is named after that song that took over the tikytoks for like an entire season. It starts out more as a Tyclay fic but changes when Wednesday shows up and both Tyler and Bianca express an interest in her. Some is actually an alternate first chapter for this fic. This is essentially a series of strung together one-shots that kind of explore how these people interact with each other. There isn't an actual ending or a big scenario where everyone comes together. Just more a meandering exploration of how their relationships intertwine and overlap. If I were to finish writing out everything outlined, I would just publish that and leave it.

Left for Dead fic

This is another fic that started out as a Wyler discord prompt fill, I wrote an outline for it, then...*nothing*

The story takes place basically assuming that Tyler does help Wednesday escape, Laurel gets what she wants from Tyler and leaves him for dead. Wednesday finds him. Hilarity ensue. This story jumps all over the place time wise. Like all over. Some chapters are pre-canon, some chapters are in canon, some are well outside of the story.

Wyler TBN Bodyguard AU

Discord Prompt Fill...(I am sensing a theme here)...That I outlined but didn't develop further. The general premise of the prompt is that Wednesday needs a bodyguard because her family is in danger but Wednesday doesn't want one because she feels she is capable of handling any threats by herself. So she arranges to get rid of all of the ones her parents get for her until Tyler comes along and of course she cannot get rid of him. Hilarity ensued. I think the initial framework for this fic was there, it was just the details that I couldn't workout without extensive research and planning. The main blocker was definining the villain and crafting the mystery that is on the peripheries of the story was just not coming together in a way that I liked. It didn't help that I decided that my little Bodyguard AU story had to have a theme where everyone's fatal flaw was tied into how they deal with the past (Wednesday refuses to let go, Tyler is so determined to redeem himself he cannot engage with the present, and Morticia romanticizes her past so much she is constantly trying to relive it). This is a story that I think I have to level up my writing overall to write it but if I did it would be good. If I didn't enjoy bumming around with my free time so much I could work on this. Though my free time is kind of shrinking everyday because of all of the stuff I have to do this year. There is a speech I wrote for Tyler in this fic that lowkey needs to be repeated almost verbatim in Wednesday Season 2. Y'all have to ask me about that one.

Untitled Essay/Thesis/Dissertation on Bad Boys

This started as a conversation on discord after reading tornadodream's fic All the Punches I'd Throw in the Name of Someone I Don't Even Know. Me and a couple of other people were marveling at how well Hyde!Tyler was executed and how much precision it takes to craft that is both romantically viable but still a credible threat to the lead. My feelings about this particular thing was becoming so strong that I started an essay that is essentially what makes a "good" Bad Boy figure. I think I just had too many other things to do that day so after I got the initial thoughts down when I had to change focus, this got left in the dust. I should get back to it though. Reading it over, I feel like I wasn't too far from wrapping it up. I should get on that.

A.B.O. Fic WIPs

All of these WIPs are related to an A.B.O. fic I have been working on here and there for about 6 months now. Each document is a separate chapter and while some of the chapters are at least completed first-drafts, others have yet to be written. While I feel like if I start working on the early chapters and preparing them to publish I feel like I could finish the series, I also don’t want to start posting anything until everything at least has a first draft. (I would feel bad for leaving people without a resolution if I just posted the parts I have.) The general premise for these fics are that during the events of Season 1, Wednesday (an omega who hasn't presented) and Tyler (an alpha who keeps both his alpha and outcast status a secret) are inextricably attracted to one another and affect each other deeply on a biological level but circumstances and what happens between them pretty much keep them from getting together. They have a chance meeting again 10 years later and the attraction/chemical biological urges are still there, but because their past is unresolved they feel unable to give in to what they want: each other. Each chapter has a past section (read: reframing canon events in this story) and a present section how the past is influencing their behavior in the now, primarily the resistance to give into their desires.

ABO Wyler Fic - Preamble

Was the first chapter of the fic, now definitely just where a combo version of a past pov section for Tyler that combines both their first meeting and that kiss in the Weathervane. Definitely other than the notes on the POV, this will not be in the final fic.

ABO Wyler Fic - Alternate Preamble

Currently this is the actual first chapter of the fic. Past part, Tyler being in Nevermore for the Rav'N. Present part, Tyler being in Nevermore again as a caterer for a alumni fundraiser, Wednesday is forced to attend by her mother. They end up seeking refuse in the same closet. Chapter end.

ABO Fic - Preamble - Morticia

Morticia POV section where she waxes poetic on the nature of fate. May be a seperate opening chapter, may be the intro to chapter 1.

ABO Wyler Fic - Chapter 1

Fun fact: This is definitely not the first chapter anymore. It's more like Chapter 3. This has smut gallore. The past part is Wednesday's perpective on how that kiss in the Weathervane is what makes her present as an omega and she goes into heat. This is immediately followed by her learning about Tyler's lies and betrayal. In the present Wednesday experiences her first heat since that time after being so close to Tyler again. Tyler is also dealing with going to rut poorly and they decide to hookup to get through their heat/rut but nothing more. Need to finish the actual smut part of this chapter.

ABO Wyler Fic - Chapter 2

Was also at one point Chapter 1, pretty sure it's 2 now. Past part: Wednesday's and Tyler's first meeting at the Weathervane from Tyler's perspective. Present: Tension quickly builds in that closet when that attraction and biology bring them together again.

ABO fic - Kiss Heat

This file is kind of a dumping ground for two past sections. One that I have yet to add (Tyler's POV on what happened at the Weathervane that night/what happened the next time they met up). The other I think I reworked or took out entirely.

[mengyao]

it's so tragic that i think it's more likely that beefleaf were in 300 year will-they-won't-they silent courtship than that they actually fucked anywhere in the pre-book-3 timeline because i do think it would have been good pretty much right away and the whole situation would a little less embarrassing for each of them if their bad decision-making was at least due to being struck down with dick2bomb-itis repeatedly instead of just quietly in love with each other

[mizunokami]

@sennokami when @kinokami‘s dick2bomb

[foundcarcosa]

lmao I’m slouched in my chair and can’t get my brain to work for the second time in the past week, and Sparrow has a bruise on her back

these big mclargehuge men inworld have really been fucking us up lately #dick2bomb

[biokinetix]

My new name is Josh D. Foley. The D is for Dick2Bomb

[coconutcriminal]

hey!! :DD

Send me a ”hey” and i’ll do this:

1. First impression: a quiet nerd who likes aliens

2. Truth is: an anxious nerd who loves aliens

3. How old do you look: fuck man you’ve looked pretty much the same since freshman year so idek

4. Have you ever made me laugh: several times, comedy genius

5. Have you ever made me mad: ngl, you never do anything to make me mad.

6. Best feature: aaaaa you have a lot of great features it’s hard to pick one, but i’d say it’d be your oddly charming aura? that or your ability to not die from your heavy as shit school bags

7. Have I ever had a crush on you: when we first met i did for a lil bit but then i realized dick2bomb

8. You’re my: coconut co-conspirator (a title of great honor)

9. Name in my phone: Rose (i’m lame with phone names, if i make it anything else I will forget who it is)

10. Should you post this too? hell yea my guy B)

[honeyrevenge1]

dick2bomb

[xxstoned-to-the-bone]

Me Stay high~

[hullpadisha-blog]

listen: that dick is mine.