#devils are baaaaad man

[nyf-archive]

"You're stronger than you think, Jesse. You've helped us fight all sorts of creatures to get to this point. You've talked your way out of dangerous situations. I believe that you have the capability to get yourself out of whatever situation you're in now. I'm sure with the resources and allies we have now, we could help you wiggle your way out of the organization that you were pulled into. Hells, I'd even be willing to cough up a good amount of gold to help do that. Or do a little bit of intimidation or illegal things." The woman really was trying to think of all other solutions that didn't include making a deal with a devil.

It left a terrible taste in her mouth to even think about it. Whatever it was Raphael wanted, she knew it would cost something. And it wouldn't just end there. He'd keep coming back, knowing that there was always something they would want or need for. But then he says something that causes her to visibly flinch. What?

The blonde stops in her tracks now at his words, her hands clenching and relaxing for a moment. She can hear Karlach hissing softly behind her and taking a few steps back, as if afraid to be caught in some kind of fight.

"Do you think I like having this 'power' that you speak of?" She would turn and look at him, brow furrowed in frustration. She doesn't move, just turns over her shoulder to look in his direction, noting the distance that he put between them. "Do you think that I enjoy looking at you, all of you, and seeing what my blood lust wants to do to you? To see your throats ripped open, chest cavities exposed, ripped in twain? Beheaded? Every time I look at you, I-" She can feel her chest is welling with emotions she can't quite describe, her eyes glossing with tears she will not allow to fall. So she takes a deep breath, trying to still her thoughts.

"All I was saying was that I believe you are strong enough to take your fate into your own hands and meld the future you want for you and your family...forgive me if I overstepped." Turning back, now, the rogue continued to walk. "My opinions on the devil will remain my own in the future. Should you wish to accept the devil as a patron, I will remain steadfast in my promise to help you return home."

"Yeah.. but he wants something from us. That isn't our souls. There's something even a devil can't do then, right? That he has to go out and find the right mortals to do the job. He wants us for something, so he wouldn't just let us rot and die right? We've got those tadpoles in our brains a loootttt longer than most. It's gotta be something about that right? About why he chose us?"

She did have a good point, but Jesse didn't quite grasp the issue Raphaels interest in them if he really was able to help, especially if it could be in more ways than one.

"Wyll seemed perfectly happy with his choices up until the whole thing with Karlach and he'd been at it for y e a r s." Jesse countered, though his tone didn't sound like he was being argumentative towards her at least. "Probably shoulda paid more attention to his contract.. technically Karlach.. does kind of fit the bill?" He said a bit reluctantly with an awkward shrug, though he definitely supported Karlach being you know.. alive and in the party.

Maybe Colette wasn't the one to be asking and chatting about Raphael with...

Though the thought quickly was pushed aside with an audible huff as he slowed his pace slightly, allowing for more space to be put between them, though he didn't stop walking. "I'm not. I've never been. If I were, I wouldn't have been working in a shitty situation for a shitty organization just to keep what little of my family I even have. And I wouldn't have been in the position that got me here." His arms loosely crossed over eachother, his eyes rolling as he'd looked around, as if he was trying to watch their surrounding(he wasn't) while they travelled. He'd sounded almost upset, offended at the accusation that it was simply that easy and he has no need to look for external solutions.

"Not everyone get's to be born with the resources to be capable and powerful. It's not that simple for everyone, and I got a feeling it's a lot easier to give up something you've always had that you don't want... Even without power you have the strength and long history of uh...fighting that proooooooobably doing a lot for you too, you know."

[mcustorm]

45 M/M Gay Movies, Ranked

The other day I bit the bullet and decided to watch Brokeback Mountain for the first time. All I knew about that movie was that it was basically the CMBYN of yesteryear and somebody got killed with a tire iron. Anyways, so I finish the movie and realize that I’ve seen a *lot* of gay movies, especially in the last couple of years. So here are my rankings according to nothing but my personal preference. I won’t write about all of them, but you can ask about something if I leave it out.

I wish I could give you a rubric for this. The reality is, there are some radically different movies on this list with different tones and intentions. There’s buddy comedies, tearjerkers, small indie features, big theater releases. So trying to rank them all is TUFF.

The Way He Looks - Such a beautiful coming-of-age movie. Maybe the 2nd one I saw on this list? Perfect length, perfect characterization, simple yet compelling, clever. And nothing feels better than reaching a happy ending (for once, because some of these movies’ endings-- SHEESH) that’s been earned. It just hasn’t been topped.

2. God’s Own Country

3. Pride

4. Kanarie - Yea, we don’t talk about this movie enough. It’s one of the most recent that I’ve seen. Beautiful. The way that it references apartheid and the war to reflect the protagonist’s feelings? Flawless.

5. Jongens - The first movie that I saw on this list, gets many a bonus point for that.

6. Moonlight - Yes, I am black. Yes, I understand this movie may be too low. Moonlight kind of scares me. In general, there’s not nearly enough discourse surrounding this one for me. But while it’s not exactly a popcorn-muncher, to me it’s the most personal movie on the list. When I look at Chiron and all that he’s been through, I can’t help but draw parallels to my own story up to this point. It holds a mirror up to me in a way that no other movie on this list does. That makes me uncomfortable.

But it is so poetic. Have you guys seen the script for this? The directing, the SOUNDTRACK, the acting. Phenomenal. 

7. Weekend

8. Call Me By Your Name - Yes, I am aware of people’s beef with this one. Yes, I understand a lot of people may feel this one is overrated. While I do think this one gets worse on rewatch, the truth is, it’s not really *that* overrated because hot take: most (meaning over half) of the movies on this list range somewhere from “just okay” to “painstakingly bad”.

It’s the score, the cinematography, the subtext in most all of the dialogue, the acting, the way that you can smell the apricots through the fucking screen. People who say this movie is a vacation ad are fucking CORRECT. One of my biggest gripes however is that it’s too fucking long. And uh, that age difference...

And Armie Hammer’s a weirdo...

9. Dating Amber* - Dating Amber has one of those “Duh” premises that sounds like it could’ve been done like 30 times before yet I can’t think of any other examples of it. So what you’d think would be a wacky premise actually turns out to be a frankly poignant movie with an emotional story arc for the main two characters.

10. Hello Stranger: The Movie* - This movie, which is the first sequel (sorta) on the list, frankly had no business being as good as it was. Even though the web series is required viewing, I felt the movie fixed like all of the series’ issues: pacing, lack of compelling drama, the awkward quarantine format. The drama and stakes are there without us having to visit Angst City. And the theme and the ending reprise is HEAT.

11. Uncle Frank* -  Uncle Frank is like The Help of gay movies. Like The Help, it’s *overall* a short, sweet and fluffy movie set decades ago. Like The Help, you’ll still come out of it feeling pretty good even though it has some dark moments. Also like The Help, you’ll wonder after the fact if the central white girl absolutely needed to be so...well, central for this story to be told. Bonus points for Paul Bettany and Character Actress Margo Martindale.

12. Brokeback Mountain - Tragic.

13. Moffie - Set during the South African border war, same as Kanarie. You even hear the word “moffie” throughout Kanarie. Anyways, this is a war movie for the gays, and a very intense watch. I liked that it was a much more realistic view of what a soldier endured during that period, and of course on the flip side I thought it was more thorough in its depiction of the rampant racism. I gotta find a good book on this era.

14. A Moment In the Reeds

15. Get Real - Maybe the most out of place movie on the list. I need to rewatch it. I do recall absolutely loving the score, however. Like, I fucks with this:

16. Freier Fall - When I finished Brokeback I was like, “Wait, wasn’t that just Free Fall with extra steps?” And yea, it kinda is. But even discount Brokeback is still pretty good.

17. Beautiful Thing - There are few things to like about this one, the relationship between the two guys, the mother’s love for her son even though it’s not all rainbows, that nice little final scene. I did not care for the dark-skinned woman being portrayed as, you know, the drug abusing, school dropout, gossipy, butt of jokes neighbor. But that guy really looks like Tom Holland tho.

18. Love, Simon - It’s at this point that I move from “Yea, that movie is good, you should watch it!” to “Look, you may like it, you may not.”

19. The 10 Year Plan - This movie is so fucking cheesy that there was cheddar coming though my speakers. But when I think of “Hallmark/Lifetime, but for the gays” this is the crown jewel. There’s some other movies on this list that could’ve taken some notes.

20. The Christmas Setup* - The trend of fluffy-white-gay-cable-network-movie continues and in good form. It’s not deep. It’s not really thought provoking. It’s cute. Fran Drescher is there. You should watch it.

21. Giant Little Ones

22. Hidden Kisses

23. Alex Strangelove - In a unique twist, the emotional core of this one is arguably between Alex and his girlfriend. All that ends up happening, however, is we the viewer keep wanting more Alex/Elliott scenes; those are the most electric in the whole movie. The end result is a hot yet endearing mess.

24. Fair Haven

25. The Thing About Harry - Freeform’s attempt at making a cheesy rom-com for the gays. It’s...okay. I personally feel like the main character’s friend is highkey trifling but it’s whatever.

26. Your Name Engraved Herein* - So I guess I’ve decided I officially hate angst. I mean, I get how it’s often necessary to tell an effective story, but I’m just not here for 2 hour indie angst fests that get passed off as “high art” anymore. I cannot do it. Somehow this is Brokeback’s fault...there just has to be a better way to tell gay stories in the 2020′s. Anyways, the last song was fuego.

27. The Perfect Wedding - Easily the most bizarre movie on this list. It’s so bad, I liked it a lot.

28. Naz and Maalik - The first half of the movie with the two leads just riffing is some pretty great stuff. The back half starts throwing plot developments that are just less than interesting.

29. My Best Friend

30. The Curiosity of Chance

31. Being 17 - Boring. Angsty.

32. And Then We Danced

33. Center of My World - Has some of the most trifling characters EVER. I was so angry. This movie for me has *0* rewatchability.

34. Just Friends

35. 4th Man Out - This movie was basically “a bro/Hangover-style movie, but for the gays.” I absolutely love the intention, but the execution was a little shoddy. One day we’re gonna get a flawless movie that nails what this movie was going for. I hope we remember this movie whenever that day comes.

36. Latter Days - So fucking preachy. 

37. GBF - Another bizarre one, but at least this movie gets how wacky it is.

38. Beach Rats

39. Shelter - I’ve noticed a lot of people like this one. To that I say...yikes. Remember that scene from Family Guy where Peter says he doesn’t care for The Godfather? I did not care for Shelter. It insists upon itself (not really, but still).

40. Handsome Devil

41. Esteros - It’s at this point of the list that we shift from “Movies that are the definition of ‘ight’ “ to “These movies are bad. Bad. BAAAAAD.”

42. Monster Pies

43. Were the World Mine - I couldn’t even finish it. Wanna watch a better musical? Go watch Kanarie. Wanna watch a better Shakespeare adaptation? The Lion King is the movie for you, or even fucking She’s the Man.

44. North Sea Texas - So boring. I actually think this one may need a rewatch, because I swear it shouldn’t have been as terrible as it was.

45. Salvation Army - I have no idea what this movie was going for. I understand that it is autobiographical, however...it simultaneously barely has any plot or character developments. This one has shades of Beach Rats, but it’s significantly worse, and I didn’t even like Beach Rats that much.

So that’s it, thanks if you made it down this far. I guess I’ll update the list as I inevitably watch more of these. I would love movie recommendations! 

[agentrouka-blog]

What future do you see for Timett One-Eye? Do you think he'll cross paths with Sansa and be a stand-in for Jon, since Jon is probably going to lose an eye?

I definitely agree that Timett is likely one of the many stand-ins for Jon, but I also think he’s not going to be as prominent a figure as the Hound, or even Sansa’s cuddly cousin Sweetrobin or any of the maaaaany others. I don’ t think they would be a specific stand-in for Jon in a romantic context, or even touch on every context of their relationship. IF they meet, the devil will likely be in the details.

That said, Tyrion is given this little speech in ADWD: 

Tyrion cleared his throat. “You can talk of old times later … after I am done explaining why my head would be of more use to you upon my shoulders. You will find, Lord Plumm, that I can be very generous to my friends. If you doubt me, ask Bronn. Ask Shagga, son of Dolf. Ask Timett, son of Timett.” “And who would they be?” asked the man called Inkpots. “Good men who pledged me their swords and prospered greatly by that service.” He shrugged. “Oh, very well, I lied about the ‘good’ part. They’re bloodthirsty bastards, like you lot.” (ADWD, Tyrion XI)

A one-eyed, blood-thirsty bastard, a Burned Man (clan name). That’s pretty blatant. And considering he is specifically named and brought up, that’s another hint that Sansa may, in fact, encounter the mountain clans soon, and possibly make use of her marriage to Tyrion in that context. They have reason to remember him fondly. When Tyrion is informed that his mountain clan men are gone, we are given detail on Timett and another potential, ugly hint for Sansa:

“The Stone Crows are still in the kingswood. Shagga seems to have taken a fancy to the place. Timett led the Burned Men home, with all the plunder they took from Stannis’s camp after the fighting. Chella turned up with a dozen Black Ears at the River Gate one morning, but your father’s red cloaks chased them off while the Kingslanders threw dung and cheered.” Ingrates. The Black Ears died for them. Whilst Tyrion lay drugged and dreaming, his own blood had pulled his claws out, one by one. “I want you to go to my sister. Her precious son made it through the battle unscathed, so Cersei has no more need of a hostage. She swore to free Alayaya once—” “She did. Eight, nine days ago, after the whipping.” Tyrion shoved himself up higher, ignoring the sudden stab of pain through his shoulder. “Whipping?” “They tied her to a post in the yard and scourged her, then shoved her out the gate naked and bloody.” She was learning to read, Tyrion thought, absurdly. Across his face the scar stretched tight, and for a moment it felt as though his head would burst with rage. Alayaya was a whore, true enough, but a sweeter, braver, more innocent girl he had seldom met. Tyrion had never touched her; she had been no more than a veil, to hide Shae. In his carelessness, he had never thought what the role might cost her. (ASOS, Tyrion I)

No more than a veil. Veil, Vale. Bloody, Gate. Playing a role at great cost. Learning. Sweet, brave, innocent, never touched by Tyrion… That’s Sansa.

Something tells me, Sansa’s time as Alayne will come to an uncomfortable end.

I don’t think she will be literally whipped. But her role as a bastard girl might leave her very vulnerable to some kind of retribution if Littlefinger’s power in the Vale is shaken. 

There may even be a dynamic at work that I like the call Small Vale Conspiracy, akin to the Grand Northern Conspiracy. Vale lords loyal to the Arryns may be hoping to oust Littlefinger, while Harry’s faction also has no desire to be controlled by him. We are given to understand Littlefinger has bought most of their support. But maybe not?

Sansa as his bastard way above her station, his co-conspirator, potentially as his rumored incestuous mistress, maybe accused of wearing the clothes or jewels of the late Lady Arryn (Like Grandpa Lannister’s mistress, who was made to do a walk of shame by Tywin), being gifted with things as extravagant as a giant lemon cake that required every last lemon in the Vale (look to Jon’s chapters to understand the importance of citrus fruit to combat scurvy in winter and you may understand how some could consider that baaaaad) and arranging fancy tourneys in a time of war... Plus, she lied about Lysa’s death.

It may come to nothing, but if suddenly a lot of people were to turn on Sansa the moment Littlefinger is considered ousted, GRRM would have given it ample set-up. Sansas is essentially Reek to Baelish’s Ramsey. (While also being young Griff, while also being ASOS-Jon with the wildlings, while also being AGOT-Dany with the Dothraki... Cycles, mirrors everywhere.)

It would fit into the pattern of everyone heading into major catastrophe before emerging momentarily triumphant. 

Sansa being humiliated and scorned might ultimately be her path to freedom, to the North.

Another hint:

His dream of selling Arya to Lady Arryn died there in the hills, though. "There's frost above us and snow in the high passes," the village elder said. "If you don't freeze or starve, the shadowcats will get you, or the cave bears. There's the clans as well. The Burned Men are fearless since Timett One-Eye came back from the war. And half a year ago, Gunthor son of Gurn led the Stone Crows down on a village not eight miles from here. They took every woman and every scrap of grain, and killed half the men. They have steel now, good swords and mail hauberks, and they watch the high road—the Stone Crows, the Milk Snakes, the Sons of the Mist, all of them. Might be you'd take a few with you, but in the end they'd kill you and make off with your daughter."

I'm not his daughter, Arya might have shouted, if she hadn't felt so tired. She was no one's daughter now. She was no one. Not Arya, not Weasel, not Nan nor Arry nor Squab, not even Lumpyhead. She was only some girl who ran with a dog by day, and dreamed of wolves by night. (ASOS, Arya XII)

Someone wants to “sell” a Stark Girl but will fail. Winter imagery. Running with a dog, i.e. some knight-like figure like the Hound, but dreaming of wolves. “I am not his daughter.” Could as well be Sansa.

If I’m wrong about Sansa taking a ship from Gulltown, she may actually make her way west through the mountains with a knight and encounter the mountain clans, and Timett. It would be a sweet parallel to whatever Dany is going to do to the Dothraki she encounters at the end of ADWD after fleeing Meereen (where she “played a role”) on Dragon back, and whatever Jon will be doing in the North that will likely involve the Wildlings, after returning from getting stabbed. 

If somehow Sansa enters recovers some power and dignity or at least gets the opportunity to politic her way North with the help of the Mountain Clans, I would love it. Timett would be a key figure to making it happen, through his Tyrion connection. 

If she eventually, perhaps even after reuniting with Jon, manages to broker some kind of peace between Clans and Vale, much like Jon did with Wildlings and Night’s Watch, I would love it even more. But that may be too much to ask? 

I’m not super-attached to this theory, but I could enjoy it. 

That’s the nice thing about TWOW. We already know Sansa will be big, crucial and heading home. So many different ways it may happen, though! 

[mahouxshoujoxme]

ALL THE TAROT ASKS BABE

the fool: do you have any nicknames?Doodle, babygirl ( ∩ˇωˇ∩)♡the magician: have you ever written a poem or song about somebody else?I did in jr high...i was emo and they were.....baaaaad lmaothe high priestess: what is your dream date?I’m going to have it soon~ ♥waking up to kisses from you, spending the day together, going to the aquarium and petting the lil stingray babbies~ the empress: do you think you will ever get married?I would like to think maybe ♡the emperor: what are some names that you like?Corey ( ∩ˇωˇ∩)♡the hierophant: do you believe in ghosts?I do, but I have not had any paranormal experiences myself.the lovers: do you have a crush?my goof, @senjyogaharara ( ˘ ³˘)♥the chariot: thoughts on astrology?I think its really fun and interesting~strength: what is your dream occupation? Working with wild animals in some way, more specifically aquatic animals, but i would love to work with any in some manner♥the hermit: what is your favorite soda pop?Mountain Dewwheel of fortune: first three songs that come on shuffle?Phoenix Down - Unguided Zardonix remixTwilight of the Thunder God - Rage of LightElevator - Hot Hot Heatjustice: favorite color of rose?Pink~the hanged man: favorite movie soundtrack?favorite movie soundtrack is Rent, better if it is the broadway play thoughNot a movie, but the soundtrack for The Umbrella Academy is 👌👌👌death: what are three things you want to do before you die?Go to JapanOwn a cute little house~live near a beach♥temperance: can you describe a strange dream you’ve had?honestly i don’t really remember my dreams unless they are bad nightmares  （；^ω^）the devil: do you enjoy thunderstorms?i love thunderstorms~ they always make me feel very calm, for some reasonthe tower: favorite colors to wear?pastels, but especially pink~and black.the star: have you ever seen a psychic?nopethe moon: have you ever written a love letter?I have~the sun: do you believe in magic?I like to think that there’s a little bit of magic in life, even if it isn’t on the grand scale of fantasies~judgement: do you enjoy school?I do as long as I enjoy what I am studying. (￣ー￣；the world: do you like waking up early?I prefer to wake up early~

[zosterops-montanus]

Adding see sea shanty folk hits

-Theres a Baaaaad storm coming (and it's symbolic)

- I am an alcoholic because I'm very sad about women.

- I am an Evil Pirate who Does Evil and It Is A Lot Of Fun

- I am a Goodly Merchant and Here is how I Murdered the ever loving fuck out of some pirates

- Johnny lost him got damn legs (and sometimes his arms)

- An old man does some things (has horse stolen, wakes his wife, tells sailors to find prostitutes, etc)

-My captain is dead and I have no legs (I am crying and drinking)

- RUM. RUM. RUM. BEER BEER BEER

- Sally brown is SO hot and sexy and powerful and amazing god I hope she notices MEEEEE (and her dad likes me)

- I am Having Fuck (and hijinks ensue)

- I miss my Wife so bad

-Killing whales is fun (and I miss my pregnant wife)

- I, a woman, am disappointed by men and am sailing away

- Prostitutes are amazing (and go to heaven)

- I hate the fucking English so much I am trembling.

- Story about the aftermath of fights (we loot the bodies)

- God Jesus above kill me so I don't have to do any more work please

- we are working and doing our jobs (which we hate)

- We are drunk

- oddly specific details about the devil.

im putting together a couple of scottish folk mixes bc that’s what i do and im honestly curious if anyone in my country has ever been unequivocally happy about anything ever

[punishercoded]

“Adventures in Undertale” Frisk had just fallen down and was in the process of getting up, and looked around in slight boredom. They had seen all this before and were ready to do it all again. Finally raising from the golden petals they started walking,“Time to do this all again.” Frisk said as they started to go to Flowey. Frisk was going to the next room when suddenly a green portal appeared above their brown haired head, two people soon falling on top of them, shooting guns into the portal. Frisk fell as a boy and man collapsed onto them. Their hp decreased dramatically from the impact due to the combined weight of the people, causing the vibrant red soul of themselves to break into multiple pieces. Frisk’s last thoughts before the darkness consumed them was simply,“That’s new…” as they fell into the dark abyss. “G-God dammit Morty!” The older man with blue hair yelled as he drank from a silver flask,“Do you realize what the fuck you just did?!” “M-Me?! You did it! You shot the portal! I d-didn’t do anything, Rick!” The brown haired fourteen-year-old looking boy studdered towards Rick. Rick rolled his eyes and mumbled, “At least I don’t bitch about everything, you little shit.” Rick then decided to look around and noticed the cave walls and the flowers on the ground,“Oh Fuuuck Morty! Do you know where we are?! This is baaaaad Morty! Y-You fucked up biiig time!” Rick mumbled drunkenly as he stumbled to begin the process of hiding the body of the departed Frisk, pausing every once in a while to drink from his flask. “W-What do you mean Rick? Where a-are we?!” Morty yelled gripping what little brown hair he had on his head. He was genuinely confused and was really close to possibly shitting his pants again. “W-We’re in Undertale M-M-Morty! And you just killed the main character!” Rick studdered and belched, throwing the body into a corner of the room. “I-I-I didn’t kill nobody! Besides… i-i-isn’t Undertale a video game or something? H-How are we in a video game?!” Morty was looking around wondering what the hell Rick dragged him into this time. Rick looked at Morty with a look of pure annoyment in his beady eyes,“Multiple Realities MOoOorty, including one where video games are actual places.” Morty’s head tilted,“Why would you pick this dimension to hide in Rick? S-Seems like a bad place h-h-hide.” He honestly didn’t really understand this at all, why out of all places to hide from their enemies… “Because MoOoOorty, it happened. The writer of the story we are in decided to put us here.” Rick burped and drank his flask some more. He threw Frisk behind a rock in the very dark depths of the room, their body already seems to show signs of decay,“Alright M-Morty, we have to get the hell out of here. L-Let’s fucking gOoooO! "Wait R-Rick! What do you mean story?! And where d-d-do we go?!” Morty studdered and yelled. “Shut the f-fuck up Morty, your being reaLly annoying. Just calm down and go check t-this place out for cool shit, the fAaaLl broke my portal gun and I n-need to fix it before the counsel of fucking idiots shows up.” Rick pulled out some glowing crystals and a screwdriver then took a seat on the pile of flowers beneath the opening of the hole. Morty looked around nervously,“O-Ok Rick, I’ll see what I c-can find."He then proceeded to look around the room, not seeing anything of interest or desire,"Maybe there is something in the next r-room.” Morty spoke seemly to no one. “Then go check it oOUtt then and stop being weird MoOorty.” Rick mumbled,“I w-want this damn story over with so this fUucking writer will stop telling everyone e-every damn detail of our lives.” Morty walked into the next room and glanced around again, the room was all pitch black except for a spotlight-like thing showing a small green grass circle. He stepped closer to the circle and suddenly a small golden innocent face appeared seemly from nowhere,“H-Holy shit! w-w-what the hell is that?!” Morty screamed slightly, already regretting coming out of the room he and Rick fell into. “Howdy! I’m Flowey, Flowey the Flower!” Flowey Observed the smallest boy and was perplexed, this was obviously not Frisk. So what was this child doing here?,“You must be soooo confused!” “You c-can say that again…” Morty spoke to himself, wondering how he could get away from this creepy ass flower. He tried stepping away before realizing he seemed to be in a white battle box. Looking in front of himself Morty saw a gray dull looking soul in front of him. Flowey giggled at how wimpy this boy must be all the time, it was glorious. Morty, on the other hand, was even more terrified,“W-What the hell is this?! L-L-Let me out!” Flowey smiled,“See that heart? That’s your soul! the very cumulation of your being! Your soul starts off weak, but can become stronger will more LV!” Morty studders grew worse from fear,“W-W-What do y-you mean LV? Wh-What’s that?” “Why LV stands for LOVE of course! You want some love don’t you?” Morty shook his head,“Actually n-no thanks, I’ll j-just go now!” Morty tried to get away before becoming surrounded by little white pellets,“W-What the hell?! HEY! LET ME OUT!” Flowey giggled,“Nah, you’re much more fun than Frisk ever was!” He laughed with menace before sending the pellets closer and closer to a trembling Morty. “RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK! HEEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLP!” The pellets grew and closer towards Morty, Morty himself assuming that Rick didn’t hear him or didn’t give a shit, the latter most likely being the answer. Morty didn’t think being killed by a video game character would be how he died, an alien or shoot out yeah. But a fake yet real game flower? Not really a memorable way to go. He curled up into a ball on the ground, waiting for his death. Time seems to go by in slow motion before the devil of a flower froze. Not in fear or surprise, but in actual ice. Morty glanced up to see his grandfather holding a freeze ray towards Flowey with a look of disgust on his face,“JesUuUs Morty, you were gonna let yourself d-die by a flower? That’s fucking pathetic.” Morty ignored Rick’s insult and ran up to him throwing his arms around the older man,“T-Thank you grandpa Rick! Thank you!” Rick was nervous at first from the interaction but slowly hugged his grandson back,“SuUure Morty, your mom would have murdered me if you died so once again, hAad to s-save your ass. Now c-come on, let’s go home b-buddy.” Rick grumbled pulling Morty away to the wall. He shot a green portal onto the surface of the wall not too far away from the now frozen Flowey. Rick took some pellets into a vial,“Might be useful for something.” and proceeded to pull Morty into the portal, it soon closing afterwards. Not too long after this whole ordeal, Frisk finally loaded their save. Looking around once again at the golden flowers and the doorway to the next room they wondered,“What in the underground was that about?”

UNTIL NEXT TIME, WUBBA LUBBA DUB DUB!

[finnoxgygenthief-blog]

Pt. 7 • random questions *last one wohoo*

701) What do your parents do? They're probably fucking Satan in hell 702) If you were a giant mega monster what city would you rampage? Wherever the fuck trump is 703) Did you ever have a treehouse as a kid? No 704) Is your dad an embarassing dancer? Don't fucking know 705) Do you plan to vote in the next election? Would if I could but 706) If you could replace one bodypart with a super bionic replacement what bodypart and what features would the new bionic replacement have? My head because fucking robot Shit. And idk some cool scanner feature 707) What if any unusual objects have you swallowed? I'd swallow anything as a kid, batteries, buttons, pins 708) When you buy something new do you get a desire to use/play with it even when they don't have any physical application yet? What 709) Did you understand the Matrix Trilogy? Nobody did now 710) Would you rather be the fella in a movie who gets the girl or the baddie with all the good lines? Idk 711) If you were stinking rich, would you only go to places other rich people went? I guess 712) Would you rather have a Man's top half and a woman's bottom half or visa versa? Man's bottom definitely. 713) Rebound relationships, good or bad? Bad 714) Have you ever owned a slinky? Guess so 715) Teenage parents, good bad or indifferent? Indifferent, it doesn't take age to be a good parent, elder parents can be fucking assholes so 716) What's the most expensive thing you've ever broken? My old macbook 717) Pirate downloads, good or bad? Seed on! 718) Democracy, good or bad? It doesn't work out but it would be good 719) Communism, good or bad? Baaaaad 720) Have you ever been electrocuted? Yes 721) Have you ever been attacked with a creamy bakery product? ..what 722) Have you ever shawn a sheep? No 723) Have you ever accidentally set fire to yourself? ..yes 724) Have you ever eaten a whole tube of pringles by yourself? Yeah 725) Have you ever been hit on by someone of the same gender? Yes 726) The war in Iraq, good or bad? Bad duh 727) The war in Afganistan, good or bad? Bad duh 728) Have you ever appeared on youtube? Idk maybe 729) Have you ever performed in front of a large audience? Yes 730) Have you ever eaten anything prepared by a celebrity chef? No 731) Have you ever been on radio? Don't think so 732) Did your school make a teatowel that everyone submitted to? No 733) What colour/style was your school tie? Navy blue 734) Do you have to wear glasses? No 735) Do you bite your nails? No 736) Do you prefer male or female singers voices? Male 737) Would you rather be the worlds greatest football player or lover? What question is that? 738) Do you get hayfever? No 739) Do you have a list of things to do before your 'x' years old? Yes 740) Do you like your age? Yeah 741) Whats your favourite physical thing you like about yourself? Idk my eyes and hair I guess 742) What's your least favourite physical thing you like about yourself? Scars and stuff 743) Are you proud, comfortable or ashamed of your body? I'm fine with it 744) What's your favourite personality trait you like about yourself? I'm a really good listener and I care a lot actually 745) What's your least favourite personality trait you like about yourself? Too blunt, I can be bitchy 746) Do you know html? What.. 747) Have you ever flown first class? Yes 748) How many languages do you speak? 2 English, irish 749) What are better, violins or pianos? Pianos 750) What's the fastest you've ever driven? (as driver or passenger) 200mph 751) What compulsions do you have? Too many 752) What makes you angry? Way too much 753) If you could see any band, which would you like to see? Nirvana ugh or Bauhaus 754) Who would you say are more attractive, English or Europeans? ..lemme get this straight, y'all are saying because of Brexit, England isn't part of Europe anymore? Sure then what fucking continent does it else belong to? Smfh 755) What would you say is your favourite album of all time? Probably Trompe Le Monde by Pixies, or Funhouse by the Stooges 756) Do you dislike hairy people? Eh it's not my type but I don't really mind as long as it's not getting messy or stuff stuck in their hair- yuck 757) Are you much of an adventurer? Yes 758) Do you like your own name? Eh 759) Would you ever sign a Prenuptial agreement? Wouldn't get married 760) How long has your longest ever phone call been? 3 hours 761) Have you ever stolen anything? Yes 762) Could you ever have an affair with a married person? No 763) Could you ever split up a couple for one reason or another? Depends on the reason 764) What are your family christmases like? What family lol 765) Do you prefer sporty or academic members of the opposite sex? I'm cool with either 766) How much would it cost to buy your love? Not a sterling / cent / whatever. Just love. 767) Who was your least favourite teacher at school and why? Mr. Osmand, his fucking face just pissed me off because I knew what he was doing with my family 768) If you met a Genie who offered you three wishes, what would you wish for? (more wishes does not count) 1) to erase all traces I ever put into her life 2) bring back my grandma 3) legalize weed cause idgaf 769) What's your current Mobile phone model and do you like it? iPhone 6+ and yeah 770) Samsung or Apple? I think I just answered that 771) Windows or iOS? iOS fuck you Gates 772) Are you cynical? Very 773) Are you a nihilist? Oh hell yes 774) do you believe in the devil? Of course 775) Do you believe in marriage? Absolutely no 776) have you ever done drugs? Yes lol 777) have you ever contemplated suicide? Yes jfc these questions are so random 778) Have you already thought about your babies' names? No 779) Have you ever been fishing? No 780) Have you ever had your national flag painted on your face? No 781) Do you have any strange body things? My bones didn't grow together properly as a kid (for uhm reasons) and now I can dislocate my joints strangely 782) What was the last social faux pas you made? Leaving my apartment could be considered one everyday 783) What makes you nostalgic? Tetris music 784) Whats the scariest thing you've ever done? Oh boy that's a long story 785) What fairy tale character would you most associate with? Like the bad guy 786) How much do you tend to swear in public? Too much 787) What are your strengths? Unconditional love, as long as it's requited, and I believe in loyalty actually, although it's obsolete nowadays 788) What are your weaknesses? Trust 789) What brand are your trainers? Jordans 790) If you ruled your own country, who would you get to writer your national anthem? Trent Reznor 😂 791) Who is the most intelligent person you know? Idk Jade's brilliant 791) Whats the craziest thing you've ever done for someone? I insulted a cop to distract him so my friend could run off 792) How did you get your name? Dali principle. Mum had a son, named him Finn, he died as a baby, I was born, they named me after him. 793) Whats the best piece of advice anyone has ever given you? "Tomorrow's a new day, new dawning. You can get a new start everyday, too." 794) If you had to describe yourself as a flavour, what would it be? Bittersweet 795) If you had to describe yourself as a car, what would it be? Some rusty old ford 796) If you had to describe yourself as an animal, what would it be? A grizzly 797) Do you think laughing at someone elses misfortune is wrong? Yes 798) If a loved one was to serenade you, what song would you most like them to sing? Sweet Dreams in the style of Manson 799) Would you ever let your parents pick out a partner for you? No 800) Have you ever tried spam? (the meat product) it's gross