#despite how he’s perceived i feel like there’s an element of yearning around him

[grimmweepers]

˚˖𓍢ִ໋🦢˚ 𝓻𝔂𝓾𝓬𝓲𝓯𝓮𝓻

He could sense her fear in how her fingers trembled, yet still, she held on, her human warmth like a flame against his palm. So fragile she could slip through his grasp like a wisp of mortal breath but it was her touch that kept him tethered.

“Is this the right path for us?”

“If it leads to you, i’ll take it. Even if it costs me everything.”

𝐭𝐫𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐬: immortal x mortal, forbidden love, demon x human, mutual pining, opposites attract, orpheus x eurydice (loosely)

𝐂𝐎𝐌𝐌𝐒: caught by mammon! | demon!ryu | season of love

[mdhwrites]

Do you think, in fiction, characters can cross a line where it's stupid or wrong for their friend to forgive them, no matter how sincerely remorseful they are?

Yes... But it's complicated.

I know, shocking answer from me of all people. /s

Anyone who wants to say "If you do X, your character is irredeemable" is lying to you. There is no steadfast line because the circumstances for every story and every character is going to be different. If you show yourself to be a ruthless murderer to Batman, he'll disavow you forever, at least in theory. Do it with the Punisher? So long as you kill the right people, you're a brother in arms. Destroy an entire star system? Well what were the circumstances, such as potentially research being warped, ends justify the means, etc. like that.

To list specific acts is to pigeon hole stories in a way that isn't fun, useful or even all that interesting because you're trying to apply our real world to a fictional world without any consideration for its rules and logic which is just, bluntly, boring. So that begs the question: Do I have advice on this matter? Well, I do actually and it comes back to the example I gave earlier.

When you take a life, you risk creating another Batman. That is why Batman doesn't kill because his goal is to make sure no young boy suddenly loses his parents ever again. You have gone against everything he stands for... And so that's it. You can be on the same side as Batman but you cannot be Batman's friend while being a killer. I know you can bring up a lot of stuff in the comics but this is true 90% of the time and I think we can all agree with that. There is almost no amount of sorrow, or saying it was 'what had to be done' that can get around the fact that you have fundamentally offended him as a person and warped how he will ever be able to perceive you...

...Which is actually how lost friendships work in the real world. You can be friends with a criminal. You can know someone does awful things. If you still see them as your bro though, it's going to be hard for you to want to let go of someone you're already close to. We like the bonds we are familiar with and grow attached to. As such, to lose a friend, you have to fundamentally see them differently. To believe there is no reason to keep them around. Otherwise, that attachment may linger, much like how hard it can be to entirely quit an ex because you yearn for the good times, despite the bad times, because you brought them in so close as to have a label that meant so much to you at some point.

I cite Luz from The Owl House abandoning her friends to death a lot because of this element. Luz is seen as the one they can rely on, as the one they can trust, as the one who will be there for them to the very end. That even if she wrongs her friends, she would do her best to make up for it like she always has. Then she decides to not just leave them to die while keeping her safe. Not just dooms an entire world. She does so while claiming it's because she just feels so guilty about a mistake she made that she refuses to even try and fix it.

If she had ever told her friends... How do you handle that? How do you handle your friend telling you that everything you thought they were was a lie? How do you look at them the same way ever again, let alone her girlfriend amongst that group who has to deal with the fact that Luz didn't even consult with her about this matter. Just one day Luz was gonna go bye as an entire universe separated them and she would be left abandoned, alone and betrayed, everything Luz symbolized no longer being what her life had to be. How do you ever recover that relationship? How do you ever allow that sort of trust again?

This is why in media when characters have big fallouts, you'll often hear, "Oh come on, I do this all the time!" rebuttled with, "No! This is different! Look at what you did? How could you have done this? Sure, you're an asshole but I always thought you cared at least a little! I guess I was wrong." Because in that moment, the character cannot see their friend the same way. Something has fundamentally changed about their relationship and so even if they make up, their relationship is going to have to be different from what it was before. Otherwise, all you're doing is reminding the person of all the scars you've left on them.

Because the only fix to change is change, but sometimes there's no way to prove you won't become the person who hurt them in the first place. Sometimes that trust can never be recovered. But how that works will be specific to each character in a narrative because each of them should have a different view on the matter. Otherwise they're one homogeneous blob and just like how that's uncomplicated, it's also pretty boring and that's always the worst sin you can commit with a story. See you next tale.

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I have a public Discord for any and all who want to join!

I also have an Amazon page for all of my original works in various forms of character focused romances from cute, teenage romance to erotica series of my past. I have an Ao3 for my fanfiction projects as well if that catches your fancy instead. If you want to hang out with me, I stream from time to time and love to chat with chat.

A Twitter you can follow too

And a Kofi if you like what I do and want to help out with the fact that disability doesn’t pay much.

[rataltouille]

GEOMETRY OF THE HOLY MOON (1 AM): A SHORT STORY

GENRE: surrealism, literary fiction.

POV & TENSE: this little space is not enough for how wild the form is so i talk about this later!!

SETTING: a small desi village, 1924-25.

TONE: dreamy, unsettling, melancholic.

THEMES: faith vs reality, how people perceive others and how they perceive themselves, grief dealt the wrong way.

AESTHETICS: the splash of water on a quiet night, thick clouds obscuring the sky, rippling the moon’s reflection on the water. the intensity of a garden in spring, the emptiness of a dying town, the suffocation from being singled out. hands grazing lightly but never fully held. a lingering sadness behind your laugh. believing in things you shouldn't believe in. putting faith on a starless sky.

STAGE: completed first draft, 4085 words.

LOGLINE: a young boy, surrounded by loss, claims to talk to god. the story follows him and his conversations with this god, all while his village spies on him as he weaves his way around the two most crucial and lonely years of his life.

LITERAL LOGLINE: on today’s news let’s talk about a small backward town that hates sad little boys who worship god, even though the place is lowkey a cult!!

CHARACTERS:

THE SUMMER BOY: he’s around thirteen, and he’s very emotionally attached to his past. he lost his family at a young age to an unstable force, so he spends his time talking to himself. he’s a quiet, demure and sweet person, always willing to help others. he’s outwardly oblivious and sees only the good in people to a point where he doesn't understand when they’re trying to do him wrong. but! considering how the story [like a lot of my others] has themes of perception vs reality, it needs to be said that he isn't all that innocent. he’s rather impulsive and rash, never afraid of hurting himself [and thus accidentally harming others].

A GOD: is he real? do we even know if he’s an actual god? a very elusive figure despite having a lot of screentime. he’s a surprisingly humanised character and arguably the one with the most empathy. he has a soft spot for the boy and the two have a deep bond which is not common for a human and a god to have. you don’t get insight to what the other gods are like, but they’re implied to exist. this story has a very messy and hazy view towards religion and godhood and their nature towards humanity, and this vague figure, a dreamlike character, is proof enough of that.

THE VILLAGE: okay so in general these people suck. the village consists of, well, the village, but they’re very fluid in the way they appear in the story? as in for the most part they appear as a collective, a unit. one character, the summer boy’s “friend”, is somewhat separate considering he’s a pretty important character. it’s very hard describing this unit of a character but essentially they’re the main antagonistic force and they hate the protagonist for seemingly no reason.

WHAT GOES DOWN:

sometime around this time, the boy chances upon meeting his “god”, this being who lives up in the clouds and whom he talks with often, except you don't know if this god is real or not. that’s one of the recurring themes of this story: what’s real and what isn’t. it’s :) a fun time :) for sure :)

essentially Things Happen And It Only Gets Weirder. i cannot even try describing what happens because it’s all very spoilery but let’s just say that this is a very sad story but not even in a “this makes me cry” manner, but rather in a “this is so fucked up wtf why”. the prose of this is very, very hazy and thick, in a manner that’s both smooth and suffocating. there’s also a lot of moon and water imagery which we love. i love the atmosphere + the setting—colonial india— as it’s a subtle but key element to the plot.

FORM:

OKAY YES be prepared for the true colours of how unhinged i am. i apologize for the form brainrot.

POV: so in this story i really said “what if it had all three of the main povs... jk jk... unless 😳😳” and then proceeded to use all three povs. you’re probably wondering, how did i do that? WHY did i do that? and my answer to that is: 🙂

the first-person pov: the summer boy narrates in first person. his pov takes up about 40% of the story, and this is where we unlock family backstory + how he feels about the various forces playing into his life. he’s an extremely unreliable narrator and he knows it; his narration oscillates between very naive and very self-aware, and this effect is pretty disconcerting. the summer boy is kind of a walking contradiction and we love that conflict.

the second-person pov: a god narrates in second person. his pov takes around 20% of the story, and his scenes all involve his conversations with the boy. his pov is extremely detached, and suspends belief because he seems awfully made up. there’s an edge to the prose in his narration, where you know that something's off, but you can’t exactly pinpoint what.

the third-person pov: the villagers narrate, either as a collective, or as an individual figure, in third person. they take up the other 40% of the story, and there are so many different people and differing opinions with this, and every time we read a third person excerpt it’s a different person, and this is mostly used to add onto the different ways in which the boy is perceived. this is also where the structural part of the form gets really wacky.

STRUCTURE: if my story isn't told in vignettes is it my story though /j. gothm is told in vignettes, each one between 50 to 500 words. the first and second person bits are normal-ish vignettes, with straightforward narration. the third person vignettes, on the other hand, are super assorted. we have a lot of epistolaric sections— there’s a letter, a folk song [which was found around the summer boy], and most of the conversation is told as just plain dialogue without tags. there’s also a phone call transcript, and finally some normal chunks of prose. what am i doing wtf.

also to add onto this the story is told non-linearly. 😀 the only thing that keeps me from going insane is the fact that there are chronological tags before most vignettes [also the manner in which they're tagged differs from pov to pov. for example a few of the third person conversations are marked just as “sunday” or “thursday”, while the summer boy’s narration is marked with the full date and year]

in all this clownery i completely forgot to mention what the tense was [the way everything else was so complicated that i forgot tense was a thing lmao] and good news!! it’s the only sane thing about this story!! it’s told fully in present tense. thank everything.

AN EXCERPT:

okay i’m once again not sharing much because this will be submitted to litmags 🧞

[The boy is scrawny as always. He carries an air of diswant— even death had rejected him when the plague killed only his grandmother— but walks like he doesn’t notice. He smiles at them, jitters, and wipes his hand across his knees. Blood comes away in thin, translucent lines. He saves it on the kerchief he keeps tucked in his shirt, careful to dirty the cloth even more. The villagers scrunch their noses in disgust; who knew how old and rotten the kerchief was, or how long it had carried blood like the unwashed sword of a warrior?]

also by the way this excerpt is in square brackets because it is a third-person interjection in a vignette that is otherwise first-person [at this point...]

SPARE THOUGHTS:

this was inspired by a conversation i had with my grandfather, where he was telling me about how people used to sing songs to the skies, as a way of devotion to a specific god. he used the [loose translation of] the english word “yearning” to refer to the emotion the singers would invoke, and that sparked the concept of a disillusioned young boy who talks to the moon as a way to please the god he’s in love with. it’s a very softly disconcerting story and once again deals with the theme of “perception vs reality” which if you know me and my work, is the theme i’m forever obsessed with.

i really like how this turned out? the atmosphere is exactly how i wanted it to be, and there’s so much i have to add on as i edit and i’m really looking forward to that. this is also the only short story i’ve written where i knew which litmag i’d love for it to be published in? like i never write things with publishing in mind, but for some reason while writing this story it occurred to me that it would be a perfect fit for this specific magazine and i love that. anyway if you’ve made it through the post till here,,,, bless you and your braincells. and that’s all for today!!

[stanskzseungmin]

LFL ~ Heaven and Hell

DivineBeing! Felix x DivineBeing! Reader

Fantasy! AU

Word Count: 3555

Genre: Angst 

A/N: Feathery light inspirations from the story of Hades and Persephone if you squint hard enough 

A/N: Not Proofread. #WeDyingLikeMen

~

~

Have you ever heard the story of how the world came to be? How about the story of how the world ended? This story is merely one of thousands.

Several divine beings that fill the pantheon. They all had their own unique power. Some control seasons, some controlled weather, some controlled elements. Some could speak to animals. Some can control life and death itself. Together they formed the world, shaped the continents, raised the mountains, filled the oceans and let life thrive. Each divine being tended to their own share of the earth.

There is a divine being that everyone love, praise and worship with all their hearts and every fiber of their being, Felix. Felix, the divine being of fire. He had an ethereal appearance: youthful, dewy, clear sunkissed tan skin with freckles that gave him a boyish beautiful appearance. Despite what you think, this divine being isn’t filled with hatred and anger. His heart is warm and benevolent. His love for man burned so true, he gave them the gift of life, his fire. For warmth throughout the cold nights, for light to illuminate the darkness and for life to cook.

But life is about balance. Where there’s fire, there’s ice. Where there’s love, there’s hate. Whereas there’s beautiful warm and loved Felix, there’s beautiful, cold and hated you. You were as pale as a sheet with skin white as snow. Your white skin is accented with a brilliant pale blue. When positioned perfectly and the sun’s rays refracted off of your skin at the perfect angle, you would shine and shimmer as beautiful as the moonlit reflected snow after a light snowfall. You brought winter to the world. Cold harsh winds and unforgiving snow storms. Your heart was as cold as ice while Felix’s was as warm as fire.

You were overwhelmed with anger and envy. You hated the people as passionately as they hated you. You hated how people admired the fire being and showered him with love. Were you not enough? Did they not appreciate the periods of hibernation the animals go through? Perhaps they would enjoy it if man hibernated? Were they so blind that their eyes can not perceive the beauty of snow?

Apparently so. Man lived their life in harvest and enjoying the beautiful skies and the cool breeze. Man gathered by Felix’s fire and celebrated with songs and stories. In a fit of envy and spite, you wanted to rid the world of Felix’s warmth. And thus, the Ice Age began. Temperatures fell, the skies darken and every animal known to man huddled and retreated to hibernation. Life in itself withered as wasted away as an unforgiving blizzard overtook the earth. 

And still. Man huddled by Felix’s fire. You could feel your cold heart hardened even more. As the unforgiving winds and cold temperatures continue to batter and beat man, they begged for the sun to rise. They knelt and prayed hoping for their deity to respond. He has heard their plight. He watched the world shrivel and withered away. He watched you try to freeze over the world they all collectively nurtured. 

But Felix wasn’t a spiteful being.

With tight lips and a held back tongue, Felix granted the people’s wishes. He heard their pleas and begs. Over time, years for man, mere moments for deities, the darkest cold nights ended and the sun finally rose. The bright yellow rays pierced through the dark clouds as warmth settled over the earth like a warm blanket. The snow melted, the rivers and lakes thawed and the herd and animals had returned.

Once again, man celebrated. They praised the fire being. They offer him gifts as thanks for blessing them once again. They laughed. They danced. They sang. You were only enraged more. Your cold heart is now as hard as stone. You watched the world celebrating, Felix watched you. Felix always had a large heart. Even though this momentous occasion is focused on him, he worried for you. However, you were so cold and distant and unapproachable. Felix feared his fire would harm your cold, so he watched you from afar.

But everyone has their limits. Everyone.

You bit your cheek as you felt your heart break. Even now, the people wouldn’t dare look at you. So you were to cause a second one. Again the earth froze over and clouds overtook the sky. The temperatures dropped far below zero and even oceans froze. Man began to fall like flies, along with the animals, along with every plant life. Maybe it’s better to be feared than loved because now, man saw you and only you. No longer did they beg for their fire deity for salvation. They begged you for forgiveness and mercy. You smile as your heart swelled with pride.

“I don’t suppose you would stop if I asked politely?” a voice broke through your thoughts.

A warm breeze passed through your haven. The footsteps in the snow seemed to glow orange as they spread out and melt. You frowned at the piercing heat surrounding your space as the fire deity walked ever so closer to you. He made sure to keep his heat suppressed in courtesy of your safe space, but heat always warmed up the cold.

“Felix,” you greeted spitefully.

“Y/N,” he replied with a frown, but his voice hinted at no hostility. He disapproved, but that doesn’t necessarily mean he was upset.

“What business would the deity of fire have within the domain of the frost deity?” you inquired staring down the male before you.

“I wanted to ask why are you doing this? Disrupting the balance of life the pantheon has worked eons to perfect?”

“Does it matter? They all smile upon you and I’m despised. They all think I’m cold and ruthless, might as well live up to it,” you smirked.

“I don’t think you’re as cold they make you to be,” Felix smiled.

“What?” you were interrupted with Felix’s outstretched hand. 

“Let us begin again, I’m Felix.”

You eyed his hand warily. An unease bubbled within your chest. Never before in your long life has anyone offered themselves to you. Even your fellow deities ghosted you. They too are uncomfortable with your cold.

“Y/N,” you whispered taking his hand.

“Well, Y/N. Would you fancy a stroll with me?” Felix smiled, pulling your hand towards his lips and kissing your cool flesh delicately. Your hand tingled with warmth from the contact as you carefully settled within the warmth of his hand.

This became routine for you both. An evening stroll at the border of your haven. You remained under the light snowfall while Felix remained on the other side with the clear cool skies.

“I think I understand now,” Felix brought up one day.

“What is it?” you whispered facing him.

“You are not at all what man makes you to be. Just because you are frost, doesn’t mean your heart matches your icy exterior,” Felix stopped momentarily to turn and face you. 

“The same can not be said about you,” you started. Felix waited patiently, deeply looking into your eyes. “Your heart is as bright and warm as your fiery exterior. Humanity loved you so and in return, you loved them as well.”

Your eyes trailed off to the side as a wave of loneliness overtook your form. “You’re a good person, Felix...”

“And you as well,” Felix smiled.

“No… I’m not...” you trailed off looking to the side.

“Yes you are,” Felix’s fingers lifted up your chin to face him. “All our strolls have been lovely.” Felix smiled brightly as you felt a warmth bloom within you. His hands find his way to yours and delicately grasped them rubbing small circles. Felix stepped forward, his front half barely peeking over the border. You see delicately snowflakes fall and get caught on his fringes and land on his nose. You both can’t help the smiles on both your faces as you both leaned closer and your lips met in a delicate kiss.

“Let me into your heart, Y/N. Don’t shut me out,” Felix smiled with raw emotions in his eyes.

Soon your strolls extended past the borders and he welcomed you within his warm beautiful haven. As promised you let him in. You told him all your maladies and emotions. You were a sobbing mess and tears continued to stream out in waterfalls. You hiccuped and gasp as you tried to continue on, but Felix was patient. He delicately grasped your hands and caressed them as he listened to your confession.

“It’s… so cold. The loneliness I feel is often unbearable. I am not loved by man, they only see you and the others. Sometimes I feel it would be better off if I didn’t exis-”

“Don’t you dare finish that sentence. You know that is not true.” Felix scolded you. “Not all man share the same mind. While there are those who adore me, there will always be those who long and yearn for a beautiful white night.”

“You can’t say that for certain.”

“I can and I’ll show you,” Felix reassured causing you to look at him with a doubtful expression. “Do you trust me?” Felix outstretched a hand. You reluctantly took his.

Since then the seasons were born. Six months a year, summer would grace the earth with bright sunny days as you granted a cool breeze to compliment Felix’s warmth. The other six months were winter as dark clouds cover the sky as light snow covered the earth. Your hands flew up to your mouth as you sobbed. You were touched by Felix’s actions. He allowed his heat to subside and allowed you to shine. He shared his pedestal and allowed you to stand by him side by side. At first it was beautiful, seeing the earth covered in your white blanket as Felix’s rays of sunshine glimmered off the settled snow. Even man was in awe with the beautiful sight.

Felix’s arm wrapped around your shoulders comfortably as he pulled your body into his and planting a small kiss on your temple.

“Thank you,” you sobbed. “Thank you so much.”

“You don’t need to thank me. This was all you, this was your creation,” Felix smiled wholeheartedly, prompting you to cry more. Felix cupped your cheeks delicately as he wiped your tears away.

“This was our creation,” you sniffled, smiling brightly.

“Yes, yes it was,” Felix smiled brightly, showcasing his pearly white teeth. His eyes formed into small crescents as he leaned his forehead against yours. Your noses rubbed lovingly against each other as your breaths intermingled. Finally, the gap was closed as your lips met. Wrapping your arms around his neck as he pulled you closer to him wrapping his arms around your waist, it felt as if sparks flew. You let Felix in and your cold heart has been melted. His warmth chased your cold nights away and your loneliness was a mere fragment of the past.

And thus,

Spring was born as a result of your love.

Your kiss and embraced was so beautiful that the snow melted, but the chilly air remained. The sun shone passionately as the melted snow seeped into the earth. As your love for each other bloomed and blossomed, so did the Earth. The grassed became more vibrant as specks of color began growing as well. Soon the Earth was covered in lavish flower fields and a gentle chilly breeze came and went. The sun was shining, the birds are singing, the bees are buzzing. Everything was beautiful.

But all good things must come to an end.

As beautiful winter may be, six months is too damn long. Beauty is nothing compared to death and starvation. Six months of endless cold. Six months of animal migration and hibernation and frozen rivers. Six months of dying plants and crops. No harvest. No hunting. Man were getting restless and man wanted winter out. 

Time and time again, man has begged Felix to grant them his warmth. They begged and pleaded for longer days and shorter nights so they wouldn’t have to submit to the cold as long. With your thawed heart, you’re able to experience so much more than loneliness and envy, you are able to learn and understand empathy as well as grow to love man as well. However, as your heart thawed with Felix’s warmth, his froze with your cold.

Life was all about balance. Felix believed that wholeheartedly he thought man would understand and appreciate balance. He shared this balance with his love, his everything. Equal share of heat and cold. Felix was beyond livid. Flames of rage burned within him.

And thus, Autumn was born.

You have heard man’s pleas and cries of suffering and starvation. You wanted to relieve their pain by alleviating your winter gift, but Felix wasn’t having it. He wouldn’t allow man look down on you any longer. You deserved your spot in the world as much as he did. As you took away your cold, the cold could not completely dissipate. It needs warmth to completely expel it. The fire deity completely refused. The earth remained chilly throughout this season, but it was warm enough where harvest flourished. Agriculture was set and ready, but it wasn’t warm enough to support the other life. Trees began losing their vibrant green hues. They fade to various shades and tints of vibrant reds, oranges, yellow before finally dropping to the cold ground leaving trees naked and bare.

“Felix, my love. Please, bless the Earth with you warmth,” you pleaded as your hand gently rested on his chest.

“Absolutely not!” he roared, flames erupted from his skin. You yelped as the burning heat enveloped your fingertips. Your cool fingertips burned and throbbed as you saw light steam. “I refuse to let you rid the world of winter. You are a deity, you deserve this! Is this what you wanted?”

“Yes, love, but the peopl-”

“To hell with the people!” Felix threw his hands up, flames erupted his skin as his eyes glowed a menacing red. You whimpered at his fiery display as your body glowed blue in self defense. Your irises glowed blue as frost covered your skin to prevent the heat from directly harming you. “I won’t forgive them for the things they’ve said about you.”

You gulped walking towards him cautiously. You slowly outstretched a frosted hand and delicately caressed his burning cheek. A slight hissing came from the contact as perspiration appeared between the flesh of your hand and his cheek and a light steam flutter through the air. 

“My love, you’ve always spoke of balance. Can you not see the balance? Life flourishes during the spring. Warmth blesses the Earth during the summer as harvests are almost at his prime. Then Autumn comes with my cool chill. Harvests are ready to be gathered to prepare for the winter and finally winter, where animal life are able to hibernate and thrive,” you spoke carefully to not prod his fire. 

“But then, we aren’t equal,” Felix sniffled, feeling pain for you. “Three months for you, but nine for me? It just isn’t fair.”

“Felix, love. Do you recall what you said to me back then? Why are you disturbing the balance that the pantheon has spent eons to perfect? This is the perfect balance we all strived for,” you smiled as your other hand found his other cheeks. “I finally understand now. You’ve taught me this. We are not doing this for ourselves or each other. Just because we’re deities doesn’t mean we command man. We serve man.”

“I- Of course,” Felix sighed in defeat.

“So you understand?” you whispered cautiously.

“Yes, thank you, love. I’m sorry I frightened you,” you shook your head as you both shared a kiss.

Taking your words to heart, he watched over man during the summer months. You were currently occupied at the southern pole of the Earth ensuring the summer months do not harm the life at the Earth’s extremities. Felix smiled fondly at the farmers below plowing land and sowing seeds.

“I do not look forward to the upcoming months,” Felix frowned at one of the farmer’s statements.

“I agree, the cold is insufferable. Why can’t the great Felix just warm up the Earth year long?” the other farmer contributed.

“That sounds amazing. The frost deity Y/N is not needed. All the deity bring is death and suffering.”

Felix balled his hands in rage. As his flames of hatred and anger burned, his benevolent heart froze. He could never bring himself to forgive man for their cruel words. Your words held truth, the Earth was in perfect balance, but why aren’t man appreciative of this balance. Why did man still despised the beautiful you that captured his entire being and soul? 

We don’t command man, we serve man.

He held you true to your words.

If man wanted him to heat up the world, then he shall. The lovely summers are now grueling. Water sources evaporated quickly as temperatures spiked up and continued to rise. Life was suffering under the grueling heat. Felix could only smirk at their suffering. It was him inflicting punishment on man who had done you wrong.

You felt strange draft on your back. The penguin chick within your hands flailed and struggled and you set it down carefully, the animal quickly crawled and shuffled to the water, disappearing under the surface. Something wasn’t right. You were at the extreme southern pole of the Earth. Snow and blizzards surrounded you, but why did the air feel… warmer?

“Felix, my love. Explain yourself,” you demanded storming into his haven.

“My love,” Felix stood to greet you with a bright smile on his face. You brought your hand up to stop his advancement.

“Love, why are you raising the temperatures? Man is suffering.”

“This is what man wanted,” Felix stated calmly pulling you closer to his body by your waist and softly planting a kiss on your lips.

“But, love-” 

“Shhh,” Felix shushed you by pressing a finger to your lips and planting another soft kiss.

“Promise me,love. Promise me that this is what man truly wanted.”

“I promise, my love. You are absolutely correct. We serve man. They pleaded for warmer temperatures so I granted it to them.”

You bit your lip in concern. Felix had no reason to lie to you, but you found his temperature to be too extreme. The heat and the cold comes hand in hand, when it’s out of balance. There are terrible consequences. From once man pleaded for warmth, they now pleased for cooling. So you complied. Autumn is more breezy and is generally cooler, while winter now dropped far below freezing. However, despite this,life still suffered.

“Felix, my love. Things are going far off balance,” you pleaded to the fire deity. “Please lower your temperatures. We’re reaching the extremities. Life can not sustain this.”

“But, love. This is what the people wanted. We serve man remember?” Felix smiled with naivete. 

    “But man. Can’t you see they’re suffering? There are droughts and their crops can’t prosper. Man are starving,” you pressed trying to convince your lover.

    His answer shattered your heart completely.

    “I don’t care about man,” Felix chuckled dryly. "They've lost all my respect when they've disrespected you and the balance we created. This is just their punishment for their sins."

Tears fell down your cheeks as you shook your head in disbelief. Felix was no longer the man you fell in love with. His heart has completely froze over and you can not do a thing to undo it. After all, things always happens both ways. Your heart thawed with his heat, his heart froze with your cold. It was all your fault. You left Felix that day completely shutting him out as you prayed for the day that his fiery heat will thaw his heart.

But that day never came.

Felix's love for you still burned strong and true. He was so madly in love with you. He blamed man for tearing you away from him. The combined might of Felix's passionate feelings towards you, his heartbreak of you leaving and his rage for man was too much for the Earth to bear. 

Not only did the oceans, rivers and lakes rapidly evaporate, the polar ice caps all melted and contributed to the rising sea levels. The extreme heat is slowly turning the Earth to desert. Soil erosion was happening too rapidly and could no longer support man's agricultural needs.

You tried to cover the Earth in your cold temperatures in hopes of offsetting Felix's raging flames, but that disrupted the fragile balance even more. His hot air collided with your cool air causing the two to swirl and chase each other at dangerous speeds. Storms and natural disasters now wracked the earth. The rapid warming is melting the North and South poles. The rising sea levels are now swallowing lands up. The oceans are filled with countless hurricanes and the land with countless tornadoes.

And all man could do is cry and weep.

And as we reach the end of this story.

Lee Felix, the fire deity, and Y/N, the ice deity: a match made in heaven that ignited hell on Earth.

[shelikesthosefunnypeople]

Pls explain more abt the ancient history thing b I’m very interested

Hello anon!

I know this was sent in months ago and I should have replied to it then but I’m a master procrastinator and life has been strange (before coronavirus kicked off I was in the middle of preparing for exams). Anyway, I’m happy to answer this.

I made a post in the distant past, basically saying that I think there is a view that history before 1800 is somehow less intellectual and that this is rooted in sexism. That post is here. Allow me to explain and please bare in mind that this is all just my opinion and is based off my experiences.

Apologies for the length.

Firstly, I love history. I’m a complete geek for it. I think it’s important, interesting and with a bit of luck I’ll be studying it at university soon. Therefore, this isn’t a post where I try to claim that actually history before 1800 is superior... because that’s just dumb. History is history and while historians can have personal preferences over which period they find most interesting, that doesn’t make that period “better” than any others. Literally. I mean, everything leading up to the present day didn’t happen in isolated, distinct boxes and all of it is useful to understanding how modern society has developed.

It makes sense that there is a general interest in “modern history”. After all, it is interesting and we have more information about it thanks to technological developments. The 20th century was a time of massive change if you compare 1900 to 2000 - although, I’m sure it’s easy for us to see the difference, seeing as the 20th century wasn’t so long ago in the grand scheme of things and many people who are alive today lived through a part of it. I’m sure people living in the early part of any century probably thought (if they had access to history) that the start and end of the previous century were hugely different. Nevertheless, I agree that the 20th century is quite profound in this respect, at least at the moment. In 100 years, who knows?

The 19th century also offers us a lot more remnants than its predecessors and I think culturally is still viewed as important. Some people have a rose tinted view of the 19th century. In Britain, I’d say it is seen by those of a certain political persuasion (check out Tory MP Jacob Rees-Mogg) as a time of peak Britishness(TM) and nationalistic pride... although that narrative is simplistic and disregards the suffering of the colonies and indeed the working classes of Britain, who had to prop up all this “greatness”. Anyway, I’m sure if you found a stuffy 19th century bloke, he would tell you how his society’s morality has gone to complete shambles and that he yearns for a bygone era that only really exists in his mind. I guess that’s just what some people always do. Conservatives, eh?

I’ll actually get to the point now.

At my college, there were two history courses available: modern (involving subjects such as the Russian Revolution and Britain from about 1950-2007) and pre-modern (involving subjects such as the crusades and the English Reformation). I took the latter course and was in a class of 18, where there were 13 girls and 5 boys. Generally, the modern history classes were weighted in the opposite way, which simply suggests that at my particular college with my particular year group, boys had a preference for modern history and girls for pre-modern. I would argue that this preference appears to be more widespread in general, but that’s not definite.

The fact that this difference existed is not the problem. The problem is what people perceived this difference to mean.

I was told by a boy (not a nice boy, so not a representation of everyone) who was studying history that the course I was taking was “the gay version”. That, of course, is a puerile insult for 2020 and highlights his maturity level - all history is very, very gay and if you take issue with that then I don’t know what to tell you. Get your head out of your arse, maybe? But anyway... why did he feel superior about studying a different bit of history?

It wasn’t just him. A (male) teacher once told me that the history course I had chosen wasn’t as useful as the other one and that the only use it had was that I could apply transferable essay writing skills to my other subjects. Which was bollocks, might I add. Unsurprisingly, he wasn’t a history teacher.

So, where were these views coming from? Why was the English Reformation - which was basically 16th century Brexit - seen as lesser than the Russian Revolution? The obvious argument one could make is that events that have happened more recently are more important and have more of an impact today. However, without the events of the years before them, would these events have happened either? Does the Church of England not still exist? Do we not have a statue of Richard the Lionheart in Westminster (because we like giving statues to tossers, apparently)?

In my opinion, the answer to this odd hierarchy of time periods lies in gender socialisation and the propensity of people to view history in the same way they view fiction. We know that the traditional male/female gender socialisation patterns are different: boys are socialised to be “tough”, “leaders”, “aggressive” etc. whilst girls are socialised to be “submissive”, “friendly”, “polite” etc. This is hopefully changing now but inbuilt, subconscious biases about the genders and what quantifies masculinity and femininity are still around. There is the stereotype of boys being interested in war due to the toys they were given to play with. Surprise, surprise - warfare in the 20th century alone was vastly different to anything that had come before it and, as I said, due to technology we have more archived about it. I’m not suggesting that only boys are interested in historical war - again, that’s a stereotype. Anyone can be interested in war, 20th century or otherwise. Despite this, I’m not going to pretend there still aren’t those guys who get waaaay into warfare and that their interest and knowledge in history is largely confined to that subject.

And that’s fine! You know, as long as you don’t start worshipping Hitler or anything equally creepy. People aren’t experts on every little bit of history and are allowed to have stereotypical interests.

Yet, that still doesn’t explain completely why “modern history” is viewed as more intellectual, just because maybe it appeals slightly more to men (apart from the obvious that anything men like is viewed as superior in some way).

As historical societies are notably different to our own - especially on the surface - and because there is so much historical fiction that seeks to romanticise it, it is not massively surprising that many people do see history as an extension to fiction. It’s gone, we live in the now, lots of people don’t even believe history matters. The fantasy genre has a habit of adopting historical (often medieval) settings for its tales. It’s an obvious example but Game of Thrones was a retelling of the Wars of the Roses, amongst other things. I think when fantasy is applied to history it makes it seem even less real than it may already and this can lead to it being taken less seriously (though please do watch Horrible Histories or Blackadder and take the piss out of all time periods because humans of every age have been fallible). Of course, it is far easier to romanticise and play around with times that are further from our own because they are further detached and therefore more fantastical. This plays into post-1800 being seen as more “real” and “intellectual”.

Some men who wish to keep women out of the historical circle accuse them of only being interested in history because of “romance” or “fancy dresses” - princesses and knights and fairytales. This is more a low down problem with internet trolls than actual, published historians but the issue still stands. If you view “pre-modern” history through this veil of fiction then it must seem rather childish compared to the stark brutality of the World Wars and the political rise of the New Right in the West. However, conversely, it could also be argued that the nationalism and legend attached to recent warfare makes it equally comparable to a story. Not a happy story but then, Game of Thrones isn’t a happy story either.

I don’t think anyone serious about history actually believes that the romantic, fantastical elements attached to any historical periods are 100% true. Hopefully, most people don’t see them as proof that being interested in a certain period makes you better than someone who is interested in another period. Any period can be romanticised, including the “modern” one - Titanic, anyone? Not to mention the frilly view we have of the Victorians (although that’s not silly because of the Britishness(TM), remember). Actually, using history in fiction and even making fiction about history isn’t even a bad thing and I certainly encourage it. I just think that the truth shouldn’t be conveniently forgotten by those with weird superiority complexes who think that because The Tudors was all about love trysts and fine clothing, the entire period is “girly” and a write off.

What am I saying amongst this rambling mess? The next time you see a girl going through her Ancient Egypt phase, don’t roll your eyes. Not if you wouldn’t do the same when you see a boy with an interest in WW2 tanks. Whichever way people come to their interest in the past is valid (apart from the creepy fascist worshipping I mentioned). A lot of things in our world are gendered when they shouldn’t be; history should be equally open to all and although there is a focus on the past 200 years (just look at the uni modules on offer), that doesn’t mean that if you are interested in the years before, your interest isn’t valid enough.

I hope I’ve managed to explain myself properly and have gotten through how gender plays into this sufficiently. I know this is a very niche thing to have an opinion on and I’d like to stress again that this is just my opinion and you are free to disagree with me. That said, if you send me hate then don’t expect a proper response.

Thanks for the ask!

[jojolightningfingers]

The New Party Meta - Part 2

Welcome back to my attempt to dissect character relationships in Berserk! Today we’re gonna talk about the disaster that is Serpico!

Serpico-->Guts

Serpico's relationship to Guts is intrinsically one that revolves around his relationship with Farnese and as such is slightly challenging to parse. It feels at times as though there are two halves to it—the half which deals mostly with how Serpico feels about Guts and what he means for Farnese, and the half which deals more with how Serpico interacts with Guts in matters where he's suppressing his “personal feelings” and doing his best to get along with him.

The biggest and most obvious thing is that Serpico considers Guts to be a threat—to Farnese's safety, and to hers and his views of the world and their places in it—and he has told Guts this on at least one occasion. He has stated that were it his choice, they would not be traveling with Guts. In the beginning, before they're traveling with each other, he does try to hide these feelings—neutral faces and simple requests that he not antagonize Farnese overmuch, which only break in the instants that he attempts to claim Guts' life (shooting him in the back with a crossbow bolt, the one-stroke battle after Farnese is possessed, and their later battle on the cliffside spring to mind). The real heart of their relationship, as laid out by Serpico himself in his own ruminations, is both that Guts is dangerous for Farnese's well-being and changing her in ways that Serpico could not or did not think to try to (which, I think, bothers him more than he lets on) and that Guts also is changing him, making him feel things with an intensity that shocks him (“While I arrayed myself in feigned ignorance, perhaps before I knew it, I too was affected by that heat. You certainly are a man impossible to ignore.” “Truth be told I thought to kill you many times. And the violence of these emotions within me shocked me.”)

Yet, they do still get along with each other quite well on the surface, when Serpico's threats don't hang over them overmuch. Even right after the Tower of Conviction, when the Kushan attack, Serpico admits that there's nobody more reassuring to fight alongside than Guts. Serpico is willing to offer him his shoulder when he's wounded, to try and carry him to safety when he's been struck by Ganishka's lightning (and here I think it's interesting that Guts calls him out on trying to do that, accusing him of not thinking straight because there's no way he can lug Guts back to shore even with the sylph hood). He overhauls Guts' attire with ease of use in mind, which Guts shows appreciation for. He defers to Guts as the leader of the group. With the exceptions of the instances in which Guts dons the berserker armor and poses a legitimate danger to the entire group, Serpico seems to have mellowed out to Guts the more time has worn on, and I wonder if that's not because of the extent to which Farnese has changed for the better—proving perhaps to Serpico that Guts is far less of a threat to her than he thought.

As far as the facet comparisons go, I think Serpico most represents Guts' fixations—on someone who he feels he must protect at all costs, and on someone that he believes to be a danger to that person. There's also an interesting little thing going on regarding how Serpico feels about his freedom—he's stated that he feels chained down by obligations (to his mother, to his father, to Farnese), and Guts, while certainly chained down by the obligation to keep Casca safe now, once roamed the lands without aim and without purpose, and he wasn't very happy doing that. What I'm saying is that what Serpico thinks he may want, as far as this freedom goes, may not be what he actually wants in the end.

Serpico-->Farnese

If I'm being totally honest, the first time I read Berserk I thought theirs was a nigh impossible to sort out trainwreck, and I do still kind of think that now.

There are two big things to keep in mind when trying to figure Serpico's side of the relationship out. The first is that Farnese is the most important thing in Serpico's world, without question. Serpico will, and does, prioritize Farnese's safety over the safety of everybody else in the group even after he warms to them. The second is that he considers Farnese his other half, considers them to be if not exactly the same, then similar enough as makes no difference—save for expressions in emotion of course.

Serpico was introduced to Farnese as Farnese's servant, and up to a certain point, this is how Serpico acts to her. He goes where she goes without question or complaint, but he is not always direct about it. He appears to refuse Farnese's order to kill Guts because they're only supposed to capture him, but he makes an attempt to do just that as soon as she's run away. He doesn't explicitly protest her decision to leave the Holy See and go chasing after Guts, but he does pick and choose his moments to try and get her to go back. The only reason that Serpico appears to stop acting like a servant to her is because Farnese stops acting as his master.

Serpico knows Farnese—he knows her moods, her expressions, and what each of them mean, again because he was raised with her, but he only is certain of them until she begins to change. And then, frankly, he's at a loss. He does not “know this defenseless side of her”, as he tells Guts. He resists these changes in his own way—trying to get her to return to the Holy See in an oblique manner, trying multiple times to kill Guts, who he perceives as the root cause of all these changes. And then, eventually, he stops, because Farnese is growing for the better and he can tell that it's for the better despite how he personally feels about it. So he lets it happen, neutrally accepting at first (“[...]the wind has blown. A wind strong enough to blow down everything you yearned for. And so I shall at least see to it that my other half isn't torn to pieces in the storm.”) and, gradually, with pride and happiness at her accomplishments.

And then, of course, there's the romance that never was. It's my read on it that Serpico does harbor at least some romantic feeling for her—otherwise he wouldn't call Farnese's mother 'astute' after her comment (“Such companions cannot be separated, because they cannot stand without entwining against each other, just like a pair of trees... my, the scent of the forbidden.”). This is of course to say nothing of his initial reaction to her entreating him to run away with her after her father intends to marry her off, though that's admittedly ambiguous at best and may or may not be influenced by him knowing that he's related to her while she does not.

There's also the slight side-issue of what kind of negative feelings he may harbor towards her because, for all that he's devoted to her, he does imply she's something that he's chained to, and Serpico again has weird issues with the idea of being free. When she asks him outright if he hates her his answer isn't an answer (“To talk of hate...”) and the subject is immediately dropped, never to be brought up again. Worthy of consideration, maybe, but as far as present canon goes it may well be a moot point, as they both seem much happier with themselves and each other.

Oh yeah and there's also that he completely, 100% loses his cool when Farnese says she wants to become a witch, and it notably takes him a while to wrap his head around that idea and accept it. Not sure what the significance of that is but it was pretty funny.

Serpico-->Schierke

Serpico and Schierke don't interact directly very often, but she does give him items blessed by wind elementals and oddly enough, they appear to be the means by which he begins self-reflecting in earnest. He thinks the wind is the thing most alien to him, being free to do whatever it wishes without consequence—so then, what does it say that he masters that power so quickly, as Schierke notes?

The other interesting thing is his general attitude towards magic. Delighted, I think, isn't the right word, but he seems much more smiley when in magical places, surrounded by magical things. The aforementioned sylph hood and sword are things he considers heartening to have in battle against monsters and they end up rather attached to him—he's impressed with their power, and with Schierke's power. He urges Schierke to have pride in herself when she feels down about her inexperience, calling her skills miraculous. He defers to her on matters that he's less experienced in, with a view that isn't colored by differences in age or gender.

Serpico-->Isidro

Serpico and Isidro aren't very close to each other—if Isidro's view of Serpico is hard to pin down and theoretical at best, Serpico's view of Isidro is even harder. He does have opinions of him though—opinions that giving him a dagger that spits fire is probably not the safest idea (though he does note that at least it's better than Farnese getting it), and that Isidro's skill in improvisation is surprisingly good (noted mostly by how Serpico sits up and takes notice when Isidro starts dual-wielding against Guts in practice, managing to make some headway but ultimately coming up short).

Aside from this the bulk of their interaction is kind of the hotheaded eager to prove younger brother and the cool aloof older brother who checks some of his more reckless impulses, though Serpico doesn't seem to go out of his way to do it. Serpico holds him back, physically if need be, when he's about to do something rash, he's constantly telling Isidro to mind himself in battle, and he's willing to explain himself to Isidro if Isidro doesn't understand something (at the end of his second fight with Guts, for instance).

I think the problem here is that we don't see a lot of the interactions they do have, but are implied—they do after all go out into Vritannis alone together to search for a ship, and at some point Isidro must have told Serpico something about his past, because Serpico's the only one who brings up that Isidro grew up in the mountains.

[lairofthewyrm]

Chitty Chitty Bang Bang headcanons/realizations

Ok I freaking love this movie but watching it for the...ok so I dont’ know how many times I’ve watched it, but the point is! This time around I’ve had the following realizations:

1. The kids are BLONDE. When Mr. Pots meets Truly (a blonde) for the first time, he hates her. It wouldn’t be that far fetched to think that Truly looked a lot like his wife...who we never see because she’s probably dead. He wasn’t pissed because she was trying to take care of his children, he was pissed at her because he saw her as trying to replace his dead wife who looked a lot like her (the blond hair has to come from someplace).

2. SO MANY PUNS AND PLAY ON WORDS I AM HAPPY

3. This movie is set in the time before massive health inspections in food making. Not sure how it works in England but that candy factory Lord Scrumptious runs has SOO many health violations going on, dude, the dogs should have never gotten in there in the first place.

4. The Grandfather probably has some form of PTSD due to how often he wonders off and is constantly imagining things. To me this shows that he’s constantly disassociating which can be a sign of PTSD. He also was afraid to sleep in the workshop, probably because it’s further from the family and is more isolated which makes him feel unsafe. Also he’s not as familiar with the workshop no doubt and familiarity means safety for someone with PTSD (I would know).

5. The story Mr. Pots tells the kids (about the flying car which is the majority of the movie) says a lot about him:

+The Baron is awful. Temperamental, abusive to his wife and everyone else. He’s incredibly selfish too. This is the opposite of Pots although we see glimpses of him being quite hotheaded and it could be argued that he’s very selfish with his children, wanting to keep them to himself. Both the Baron and Pots can be childish too. The Baron is much more extreme in this area but Pots can whip up a song in no time and is very creative, something many of us associate with children. The Baron is this element taken too far and overshadowed by anger and selfishness. Something Pots as a parent and caretaker is probably terrified of becoming.

+The Baroness hates children. BUT the way she acts is far more like the way someone with a phobia acts. So the Baroness banned children because she has a phobia of them. Why include that in a story you’re telling your kids? Because you’re afraid of kids on some level yourself. Pots is most likely afraid that he will fail his children.

+What’s so strange is when the kids get kidnapped. It’s wonderful in a story to have someone who loves you rescue you, but it’s odd as a parent to tell a child that sort of story when your own children are the stars. So why include this element? Sure it adds excitement to the story, but the reason the kids got kidnapped in the first place was because they disobeyed those who were caring for them. It’s a solid rule, unless you’re in danger don’t talk to strangers. Learn which strangers are safe to go to, and which aren’t. But the kids get kidnapped because they were disobedient. I personally don’t think this is so much of a reflection of how Pots sees his children, but how Pots views himself as a parent. At the start of the movie we see that food is kind of an issue for these guys. Money is a major issue as well. So this in my opinion, is a deep seated fear of Pots. “What if I’m not raising my children right? What if when I’m not looking they aren’t doing what I taught them to do so they can be happy and safe?”

+Truly disguises herself as a cursed doll “yearning” to be free. This implies that Pots perceives her as wanting to be free of her overbearing father or that he is accurately observing her actions and she truly does want freedom.

+Pots disguises himself as a goofy, somewhat limp, doll, implying that he puts on a goofy and brave face for the kids despite feeling limp and lifeless.

+The kids that hid below the castle pretty much did all the grunt work when it came to getting the

6. When the story ends, after Pots and Truly get together, Pots is being all philosophical WHILE HIS CAR STARTS FLYING. Now normally I would argue this is a metaphor for something, but EVERYONE WAVES AT THEM AS THEY FLY BY SO IT’S CLEARLY A THING THAT IS HAPPENING. So like that makes me wonder...how much of the story is actually fake and for how freaking long has Pots been a techomancer mage dude and did his first wife die in a freak accident while they were inventing something together? Also how much of these abilities have the children gotten? There are some things we will never know.

7. This movie is so freaking dark and has so many sexual undertones why do we say this thing is rated G?????????