#despite all the difficulties

[midnight-mourning]

*Taps mic* Heard y'all like Moon around here, you're in luck, this one's for you

massive, MASSIVE thank you to @lunarmoves for beta-reading this chapter!!

She put a lot of time and effort into making my BS readable for y'all and it's greatly appreciated <3 <3 <3

Shay also makes really good dca stuff (also sebastian solace but I know very little about the fish tbh) and you should check her out!

Also, happy 200k+!!! We're only 297k from truly becoming the 500k enemies to lovers slowburn of our dreams lmaoooo

But for real I apologize for such a delay with this one. If you'd like to hear my excuses/reasoning they're below the cut, or you can just go read the chapter whatever suits ya ^-^

Tag list (if you would like added please see this post for more info):

@scarletcowboy @beemyhuneybee @fishm0ther @deviouscrackers @elsajoyagent8

@luckyyyduckyyy @zenkaiankoku @jogimote @local-shrub @amarynthian-chronicles

@robinette-green @everlightreader @sinister-sincerely @starredeclipse @dangerva

CW: medical stuff & additionally a bit of unreality mentions

Okay going to try and keep this simple bc I've said parts of it before

So as most of you know, I've been sick for 3 months now

I've now been on two rounds of steroids, and currently on my third round of antibiotics, which are basically keep me fucntional, not improving

besides general discomfort and pain, my memory has been pretty shot at times, I will go through the day and barely remember what I did/what I'm doing/what I need to do

as someone who had brain fog caused by covid a few years ago, this was genuinely a scary experience because ultimately, this has been worse

i've felt out of control of my body, having times where I'm mid thought and then instantly lose it

this is not my normal, I usually pride myself on my memory, so losing it has been incredibly devastating and scary

this was not helped by the fact that the quick care I went to (THREE TIMES for this) basically kind of sort of tried to gaslight me into believing nothing could be done and that it's not an infection

so not only has this entire thing has gotten dragged out so much more, which makes me sad tbh, but I've also felt like I've been going crazy bc it felt like no one was believing me when i said I was sick and not getting any better (including friends, family, coworkers etc, though unintentional on their parts to be fair)

I feel like I've lost three months of my life and coming to terms with that has been, yeah

on top of all that, I'm still in school AND doing grad stuff, and while the school side of things has been okay (thank god), grad's had it's moments, won't get into it but have had multiple issues with my advisor that have been at times just really tough to deal with

Confused spirit got pushed to the back burner, because i quite literally at times could not think, and when it comes to this fic, where there's multiple ongoing plot threads, characterizations, lore, and so on to keep track of, it was just, impossible to me to even consider writing for it

having shorter stuff like promptober, the oneshots and such was great to keep me writing, and also still interact with everyone in the community, plus i had a lot of fun with them so that helped too

this is all to say that I do sincerly apologize for the delay, and at the very least I should've clearly communicated about there being a hiatus, when this all started I thought i'd be down for two weeks max, then as that time kept increasing I just kept putting it off and putting it off because i thought i was going to get better, and then I didn't

I do this for fun and for nothing else, fic writing isn't content (it's engaging with fandom) and i have to remind myself of that sometimes but given that I've been around in some capacity on and off I feel I should've said something in some regard

Having said all that, I'm doing okay now! Still sick, but as long as I'm on meds I'm functional, stuff is getting managable with grad, and hopefully have some fun things coming up irl! Point is, the last three months haven't been the best, but they've been alright, due in part to all the support you all have given me, so thank you for that, can't say it enough :)

Okay, I think that just about covers it, thank you for taking the time to read all of this if you did <3

[greater-than-the-sword]

First night of the weekly girls night. Everyone who said they could come canceled down to the last person. This is completely and totally par for the course

[vynnyal]

Finally finishing totk

[celestialrealms]

I just noticed Mephisto matches with Barbatos (who is matchy with Diavolo) in the anniversary outfits in his SSR memory card

These three were also the only three who had half masks in the masquerade event!!!

Anyway, The Royals with Mephisto chat group when? We got one for Purgatory Hall with Raphael..... it's just fair !!

And one for Mephisto and Diavolo as well, but also one for Mephisto and Barbatos too. because you can't tell me their relationship isn't deeper than the devs portray when Mephisto has lines like this about Barbatos's room:

[bumblingbabooshka]

B'Elanna, Neelix, Tuvok and Chakotay needed to star in an episode where they just talked about their different beliefs and approaches to spirituality/religion. Paired off and all together. I need to gain more insight. I need characterization and I need it to be messy.

[vladlen4i]

The time has come! "Puppy" from anywhere but here by @hauntedoneao3

I am eternally grateful to the wonderful people @hauntedoneao3 and @middleofnothing! You are truly amazing and incredibly talented!!! Thank you for all your support!💗🥹 and I hope to be in your team again one day! Many thanks to the mods for organizing this event @dbh-bb2023!!❤️‍🔥✨

[love-too]

"whatever souls are made of, ours are of the same matter" yes, but also have you considered two completely different souls, made of apparently incompatible materials, relentlessly choosing each other, molding each other and scarring each other to the point of creation? Wielding this disadvantage the universe handed them into new law of physics out of sheer willpower. Metal can still bask in the beauty of a moving flame and fire would still want to get close even if it means losing grip, after all.

[puppuddart]

(2/2) rwd digisketch dump pt 2 this time from today!! my art has improved a whole lot since i started drawing fanart for these guys and i can’t wait to see how much more it develops from here on out

[kirkwallguy]

idk how people have finished the game already im unemployed and gave myself a headache from playing too much and im literally in act 1. am i just bad at the combat.

[wokeuplaughing]

the other day my old professor I hated had an appointment at my job so after checking her in I went "do you still teach biology" and she looked at me like : | cause she did not fuckin recognize me due to me never going to that class

[nappingpaperclip]

trans & intersex people get dragged into everything just by virtue of existing. just existing is enough to make people angry. we just try to be normal and live normal lives and be good people like everyone else. having to live thru so much vitriolic transphobia & intersexism in the world which directly correlates to how you get treated by strangers every day all day just cause of some crybaby losing a sport against someone who is literally cis just because she ASSUMED she was trans is such a crazy experience.

I miss when people knew less about trans & intersex people. at least it was easier to fly under the radar. now it’s everywhere… like we are not already struggling enough without having to be dragged into debates about our existence whenever a white woman gets her feelings hurt. and billionaires feeling the need to ‘speak out’ against our existence like they’re the gender authority. it was never about us in the first place, but transphobes are so angry and bitter that they will always find a way to make us feel unsafe. it’s bizarre and a sad way to live. I can’t imagine how much unsafer it must feel for black trans & intersex folk rn.💔

[rohirric-hunter]

I'm also obsessed with the Lost Lands series of point and click adventure games because the company that makes them is based in Ukraine and usually the English translation is very good but every once in a while something gets worded in an extremely amusing while not technically incorrect way...

Hmm... Big magic.

[salsflore]

⠀

[sysig]

Best taste in confidants (Patreon)

[voltrixz]

Remembering how I watched a silly recap of the 2 sinister six eps (do not ask what my reaction was seeing the electro and shocker scenes again (there’s a ramble sitting a server somewhere .) BUTTT one thing that really stood out to me was the 2nd sinister six ep. Because like. OURGHHHHHHH. Made me remeber that mysterio set up an illusion that shocker and doc ock were the final duo AND MAN. As much as I find Mysterio in the sinister six really fun, I really do wish we got a Spideman Vs. Shocker and Doc Ock. LIKE ARGHH I need to go on a full on ramble about their dynamic (and how I would further dissect it ) but mannnnnnn

[bcneheaded]

I'm gonna be honest though yall, I have an extremely hard time coming back here because I genuinely find it really difficult to like... write.. anything? the formatting here really sucks, and the site is overall just difficult to deal with. That and due to Tumblr rpc nature and whatnot, it's jsut hard to get a foothold really, especially after you've been gone for some time, and my nd ass overall just finds the whole Tumblr rpc hard to deal with formatting and energy wise. That being said! I'd yall want tk write on like discord or something or if anyone has literally any better options over Tumblr then my go's please let me know. I'm down for short things, for sure.! But I need, NEED to like... idk.. think/talk dynamics and plots and stuff otherwise it just doesn't really work for me tbh ;~;