#deleted half of this by accident and had to rewrite from memory | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

marvels-writings · 4 years ago

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When the World is Against Us (17)

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Wanda Maximoff (Scarlet Witch) Masterlist

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A/N: Sorry about the delay with this, google decided to delete the draft I had so i had to rewrite it. This isn’t the best part since I’m in a bit of a writer’s block but here you go, I hope you like it!

Nostalgia filled you as the jet landed in front of the compound. Hardly anything had changed since you were gone. Natasha and Steve headed out first as Sam helped Vision get out. The android limped, trying to assure everyone he was alright while doing so.

Once Wanda was sure Vision was alright, she followed you inside. Her hand slipping into yours as you walked towards the entrance to the compound. The sky was a bright blue, the sunlight warming your back as you walked. Resisting the temptation to see your room, you went to where your mom was leading you.

You rushed through the hallways into the main room where Steve was leading you. Many of the recruits side-eyed the avengers storming through the compound. All of you were wanted by the government. But who was about to try to arrest ex-avengers?

Blue holograms filled the room Rhodey stood in as he talked to them. The secretary of state stood in front of him as you walked into the room. A frown went across your face as memories rushed back to you. His nose had healed rather well, but his attitude made you want to break it again.

Wanda subtly pulled you back when she saw the look on your face. You nodded at her before facing forwards. A small smile made its way across your face when she squeezed your hand in support. She knew what you had done in the prison. Although the need for revenge was there, she didn’t want it.

“Mr. Secretary,” Steve stated, standing in the doorway of the room. His hands rested on his belt, he stood a level above the secretary.

“You’ve got some nerve,” He said, walking up to you. “I’ll give you that.”

You stepped forward to reply when your mom stepped in front of you, pushing you back lightly. You sighed and stepped back again, the secretary’s eyes following your movements. Natasha shot you a glare over her shoulder before responding to him.

“You could use some of that right now,” Natasha stated, a tiny smirk crossing her face quickly. His gaze shifted towards Steve.

Rhodey stood behind them, watching the interaction. Which was when you noticed his legs. This was the first time you’d seen him after the accident at the airport. You didn’t think he’d been hurt this badly. A wince covered your face as you watched the robotic legs shift. The blame was on Vision and Sam, but you still felt some of it on you.

“The world is on fire,” He began, his eyes shifting towards you as he continued. “And you think all is forgiven?"

You shifted on your feet, licking your lips as Steve moved in front of you. Threat underlined his every word. His actions angry and deliberate, more towards you than the rest of the team. Your mom threw you another glare over her shoulder, making sure you wouldn’t say anything.

Sarcasm was something that rubbed off from the rest of the team, especially Tony. Using it against the Secretary of State could only get you into a worse place. You already broke his nose, the last thing he wanted from you was sarcasm.

“I’m not looking for forgiveness,” He answered, jaw clenching slightly. “And I’m way past asking permission.”

You glanced at the TV in the corner of the room. It reported that Tony Stark was missing, along with two unidentified others. The spaceship they had come in was also gone. Your jaw clenched, worry-filled you as you didn’t know where he was. You hadn’t seen him in a few years, but you still missed him.

“Earth just lost its best defender, so we’re here to fight.” Steve stepped forwards, “And if you stand in our way, we’ll fight you too.”

The secretary looked up at him angrily, trying to see if he could do anything. There wasn’t much he could do, you were the Avengers after all. He was right, the world was burning. He wasn’t going to wage a war on the Avengers. There were lines even he wouldn’t cross . With a heavy sigh, he turned to Rhodey who looked at him with an expectant smirk. Instead of being annoying with the scene playing out in front of him, he was amused. The secretary glared at him, almost to try to get him to stop smiling.

“Arrest them.” He commanded, sounding more exasperated than authoritative. Rhodey raised an eyebrow and shrugged.

“All over it,” Rhodey answered, waving his hand and shutting down the hologram.

He stood in front of you with a smirk, looking at all of you with a smile. You fidgeted, unsure who was going to make the first move. Rhodey shrugged and dropped his arms by his side.

“That’s a court martial.” He shrugged.

Steve and Natasha chuckled while moving forwards. They greeted him with a familiar hug, glancing back at you when you stepped forwards. The guilt was written on your and Wanda’s face for his current state. Rhodey saw it but didn’t say anything.

“Well, you guys look like shit,” Rhodey commented, chuckling with one arm resting on the counter behind him. You laughed and made a half shrug, one hand squeezing Wanda’s.

“The hotels weren’t exactly five star,” Sam replied, causing you to chuckle. Vision leaned his weight on him, still limping from the wound in his stomach. He chuckled at Sam’s response, wincing almost immediately after.

“I think you guys look great.” A voice sounded from behind you. A voice you thought had left years ago.

Whipping your head around, you saw Bruce standing there, his shirt ripped from the sleeves as he fidgeted with them. The mud coating his sleeves standing out compared to the lightness of his clothes. Your mom stared at him for a few seconds, mouth wavering open for a few seconds.

“Hi, Bruce.” Natasha greeted, voice wavering unnaturally. You glanced towards her nervously, edging towards her till your shoulder touched hers. She startled, leaning backward slightly into your touch before moving back.

Natasha hadn’t told you much about her and Bruce. She had told you a little about how she had recruited him, a little more before Ultron. But after Sokovia, she didn’t tell you anything except for the fact that they kissed. She blamed herself almost as much as him for leaving.

“Nat.” Bruce nodded, his jaw clenching.

A tense silence surrounded the room, you heard Sam mutter something but you couldn’t make out what it was. Vision gave him a strange look. You cleared your throat and gave Bruce a curt smile before excusing yourself and Wanda from the room.

Hand intertwined in hers, you dragged her away from the room and into the elevator, pushing the button to take you onto your previous floor. Letting out a loud sigh, your hand slipped from hers as you leaned against the wall dramatically. Wanda chuckled and rested against the other wall.

“It’s not that bad.” Wanda consoled, but you simply raised an eyebrow. She laughed and a smirk crossed her face. Her smile infectious, a smile covering your face quickly as you waited for the inevitable sarcastic comment.

“It’s only your mom meeting her ex.” She commented.

You snorted loudly before bursting out into laughter. Wanda laughed at her joke, watching you cackle over the simple statement. Once you’d stopped laughing, you offered her your hand as the elevator doors opened.

“To be honest, I’m not even sure I’d count it as dating.” You muttered while heading towards your room. The hallway looked so familiar, if not a little cleaner than what you remembered.

Wanda shrugged next to you, her hand slipping into yours while heading into your room. The door slid open easily as you stepped inside.

Everything was cleaner than you remembered leaving it. The bed was made, the clothes that had been strewn about were put neatly in the closet. The door to the closet was open, revealing all of the clothes you’d forgotten to take with you.

You had thought your memory of this place, your home, could never fade. But it could, the clothes were in different spots, the room had a different lighting. You remembered it almost as some sort of haven, away from everything else. It’s amazing how much your memory eluded you.

All of the random perfumes and hairbrushes you owned were set up on the dressing table. You spotted a familiar shirt in the closet and went towards it as Wanda sat down on the bed. She played with the bedsheets before reaching out for a necklace placed on the dressing table.

“Remember this shirt?” You asked, lifting it in front of you. A lopsided grin covered your face as you remembered it.

It was the shirt you wore on your first date. It was a navy blue denim button-up, you’d worn a tank top underneath it even though you had the buttons done up all the way. But the park Wanda had taken you to was warmer than you had anticipated, you ended up walking around in a button-up open with the tank top showing.

Wanda had been staring at you when she had tripped over a rock and fallen face first. A small part on your shirt was ripped from where you’d fallen from laughing at her.

Your girlfriend glared at you playfully before trying to snatch the shirt away from you. You drew it away from her, laughing as you did so. Taking off your sweatshirt, you tugged the button up over the black t-shirt you were wearing. It still fit the same, the sleeve of the shirt was slightly ripped from where you had fallen.

“This brings back memories,” Wanda commented, laying down on your bed while facing the ceiling.

You moved to lay down beside her, the button up flaring and meeting her hand. Wanda chuckled as one of your hands tried to slide into hers. It was almost a custom at this point, for one of you to try to hold the other’s hand.

When you felt something metallic in her hand, you moved up to take a look at it. It was a necklace, the chain was a dulled silver and the pendant was a delicately woven butterfly with stones through the wings.

It was the necklace Wanda had gotten you for your six month anniversary. You’d worn it almost religiously after she had given it to you. But after the chain broke in a mission and you had to replace it, you preferred to keep it in your room instead. You chuckled as you remembered almost crying when it had happened.

“It definitely brings back memories.” You muttered, playing with the silver chain of the necklace. Wanda began to hand it back to you when you closed her fingers around it, winking at her playfully.

The witch smiled and began to try to put it on, but couldn’t do the clasp properly. She sat up, fingers still struggling with the tiny clasp. You chuckled and sat, up, gently moving her hair over her shoulder and out of your way. Wanda dropped the clasp in your fingers, waiting for you to close it.

You closed the clasp, patting her back when you were done. Wanda whispered a small thank you, her head bowing down as she played with the pendant in her fingers. A sigh left you as you rested your hands comfortably on her waist.

The mood saddened slightly as you began to remember what you had lost. You almost forgot how much you had missed the compound until you were here. You missed everything, from the way the string lights would make the room seem bathed in gold, the way it looked in the morning. It was almost nostalgic when you thought about what you had lost.

FRIDAY alerted you that your presence was required for a meeting in the kitchen.

You jumped, almost falling off the bed at the sudden alert. FRIDAY was something you had been used to. Now, hearing a voice randomly was a little startling. Wanda turned around and saw your eyes wide in surprise. She burst out into laughter.

You giggled at your reaction, watching her laugh at you. After a few seconds, you shook your head and lightly shoved her shoulder. She bit her lip to try to stop laughing, still finding it hard to do so as she got up.

You rolled your eyes and offered her your hand again. Wanda slid her hand into yours comfortably, leading you towards the kitchen. You had little to no interest in the meeting, only wanting to stay in bed and not bother with any of this. You just didn’t want to lose anything more.

Wanda put stroked your knuckles comfortably, consoling you silently. Both of you had lost something, it was almost poetic you found something new with each other.

| Part 18 |

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rokutouxei · 4 years ago

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the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart

ikemen vampire: temptation through the dark theo van gogh / mc | T | [ ao3 link in bio ]

The challenge seemed pretty simple: to try to befriend the university bookshop’s most sour employee, Theo van Gogh. As a literature major with a boatload of book recommendations on her back, it ought to be a simple task indeed. But as she uncovers what lies between Theo’s pages, the more she finds it harder to become closer to him without having to put the feeling directly into words. What can she learn from Theo about what it means to stay—and how can she teach Theo about what it means to let go? | written for ikevamp big bang 2020!

[ masterpost for all chapters ]

CHAPTER 21 OF 22

—The heartbeat is actually the sound made by the heart valves closing. If you, my love, ever hold a stethoscope to my chest I will tell you to listen for the silence in between. What is and what will always be yours is the sound of my heart finally opening.

- "Letter to the Editor", Andrea Gibson.

interlude ii

In the span of time between understanding and acceptance, Theo half-writes a million letters, all of them suffering the same kind of fate: undelivered. The email gets deleted, the text erased, the sheet crumpled, set on fire. There are too many words he doesn’t have the courage to say, and fuck, he’s not a literature major, after all.

He’s only the arrow shooting forward, not the bow pulling back towards itself.

But every second he spends lost in the memory of her leaves him splitting open, so for the first time in what feels like centuries, he unfolds what he’s kept in his heart the size of his clenched fist. Allows its beating space to unravel. And when he doesn’t have the vocabulary to put it into words himself, he borrows—borrows from others until he finally finds the ones that will feel just right tell.

Until they’re finally just right to tell.

The first letter he ever writes her, he composes outside the gallery of his brother’s exhibit, on the opening day. He’s crouched on the stone steps with a book in his hand, a little poetry book Arthur had dropped by for him earlier that day. For what, the bastard refused to say, but he had that look on his face that Theo hates: that Arthur knows exactly what he’s doing it for.

The first of his letters are spiteful, the words he borrows barbs, promises he doesn’t intend to keep when he rewrites,

I shall forget you presently, my dear, So make the most of this, your little day, Your little month, your little half a year

onto a sheet of scratch paper, one he ultimately throws into a bin before he’s even felt like he’s begun writing anything.

He gathers his heart a little closer for the second one, highlighting a verse in shaky yellow while he’s on a bus ride out of town, on the exhibit’s closing day.

The stars are not wanted now; put out every one, Pack up the moon and dismantle the sun, Pour away the ocean and sweep up the wood; For nothing now can ever come to any good.

But it is not enough. And even after that, there are an innumerable number of letters that still are not enough. He borrows from everyone he’s learned from her: Shakespeare, Frost, Whitman, Dickinson; he borrows from new names, Allan Poe, Silverstein, Neruda, Keats, Siken; he borrows from poetry, from fiction, from plays. From philosophers, from writers, from artists. The words never seem to be enough to cross the gap between what he’s said and what he should have.

He writes the ten-thousandth letter with his heart beating in his chest so loudly he can barely hear his breath,

And I lean down towards you with muscle and wing, as if to a grave stone, (I put the years to sleep)

my lips seek yours... like spring.

longing, the sear of it, the idea of having touch so warm under his skin the world feels all too cold. He misses her like he would a lost limb. He reads the poem over, and over, and over again until he cannot deny it, and when he does not have the will to deny it he sets it on fire, instead.

Arthur asks him why he’s making it so much harder on himself, asks him why he’s putting himself in all this agony for nothing—Arthur talks like he knows everything. And maybe he does, the fool that he is. “Just call her,” the flirt says, “Call her from my number, send her a message—" But Arthur doesn’t know what happened, doesn’t know what it felt like in that rooftop, the words hanging in between him and her, unsaid, said, told in their heads—but never out loud, not enough to make it come to life.

To make it real.

To make it seem like Theo isn’t just writing a story in his head.

One where she’s only an unwilling participant.

Letters are the one thing Theo can hide behind, besides poetry. He can pour his entire heart in that little sheet of paper, tell her all that he wanted to but never could—send it away, and then not have to wait, expecting a response. He considers it the same as writing a message, stuffing it in a bottle, and then throwing it out in the open sea. It would be great if she finds it. It would be great if she’s moved enough by it that she writes back, that she forgives him, that she continues to wait for him even if she’s already so far away.

If only he could get it right.

The millionth letter doesn’t make it past his desk. He hears the poem from a phone in the bookstore: two literature majors reading from a book on the shelf, reciting the lines, Theo barely hears it over their gasps, but when he does he scrambles to put it into writing, thinking, this is it, maybe this is the one that’ll get me across, says,

It well may be that in a difficult hour, Pinned down by pain and moaning for release, Or nagged by want past resolution's power, I might be driven to sell your love for peace, Or trade the memory of this night for food.

takes the pen in his hand and nearly tears the page when the poets say:

It well may be. I do not think I would.

Theo is on his headphones for the rest of the afternoon, hiding in the stockroom stacking books.

He sits and negotiates, negotiates, negotiates with himself over and over again, like this was a case, like this was a business deal, instead of something else, something that’s less rigid, less in-boxes, one without protocol. Arthur tries to talk him into it. Vincent tries to talk him out of it. In, out, of what, Theo doesn’t know anymore, their voices fading into the back of his mind when he begins to really think about this.

About her, about her hands.

About his.

Sometimes, at night, in bed, before I fall asleep, a poet once wrote, I think about a poem I might write, someday, about my heart.

Theo does the same.

Much to his dismay, however, the world does not fall in around him, does not close him off from the outside world no matter how hard he tries, no matter how much it seems like that’s what ought to happen. The semester rolls on. The exams are still hard. The Halloween Party is still the same talk of the university as it did a full year ago, like the world hadn’t turned upside down for him since then.

The universe had even granted him the most effective way to wallow in his pain, the new girl in their little friend group (the one he was only in because of her) whose heart was a mirror of the girl he’d loved. Why is it that those that do so poorly in romance tend to flock together like recognizing the uneven parts of themselves? She is drunk and talking about someone else, but when she speaks about letters the same way she used to, something in Theo’s heart cries out.

Too bad he still doesn’t have the words.

The closest Theo gets to what he wants to say comes in the form of old memories, a scribble of a haphazardly written note on a piece of clean café napkin, in her handwriting, no, there’s no mistaking it. Heart by heart, Louise B written in familiar cursive. A note from a lost time slipped in a returned book, perhaps on purpose, perhaps on accident. He turns the search terms over and over until he finds it, a rush of air exiting his lungs when he gets to the end:

Now that I have your heart by heart, I see The wharves with their great ships and architraves; The rigging and the cargo and the slaves On a strange beach under a broken sky. O not departure, but a voyage done! The bales stand on the stone; the anchor weeps Its red rust downward, and the long vine creeps Beside the salt herb, in the lengthening sun.

Now that I have your heart by heart, I see.

But he doesn’t hasn’t ever had it, not since she’d left, so he doesn’t send it.

Theo doesn’t cry. There is no reason to, he thinks to himself, nothing to be upset about, not when it’s him holding himself back, when this was all his fault. He only sits quiet, repentant. He doesn’t make any mention of her, and when she is mentioned, he doesn’t say a word.

What worth are words now?

This goes on for weeks. And it seems like an eternity later when Vincent catches him sitting in the dining room with that same idle look on his face, that same dull expression, he steps into the light of the older brother Theo has always seen him to be, the older brother he’s always hoped to be—and puts a hand on the shoulder of his lost younger brother, eager to lead him home.

“Theo?”

“Broer.”

Vincent’s voice is soft. Patient. “What are you looking for?”

“I don’t have the words for… this,” Theo says, gestures vaguely at his heart, like pained. “I don’t know where to look for them anymore.”

And his brother smiles like he knows all the answers. (Theo believes Vincent has all the answers.) “There is poetry everywhere, Theo," he says, sounding awfully like her, "Your eyes are focused on the wrong things.”

Like a flash of lightning, he hears it: in the lilt of her voice, the tinkle of laughter, her voice like thunderclouds rolling over a sunlit summer. The poem that found him, instead of the other way around.

You.

Theo immediately goes out to find fancy stationery he knows she likes and gets his best fountain pen and writes; the weight of honesty pins the words solidly onto the parchment. Theo had not known metaphor until that moment, had not understood what it meant when whatever a sun will always sing is you was written, until—

Until it was his heart that was chanting it.

And the day after, he delays the inevitable: seals the letter with glue, sticks a stamp on the upper right corner of the envelope. Theo slips it into the to-mail box without a word, and then exits the post office like he hasn’t left his heart there for sending.

#the wonder that’s keeping the stars apart #ikemen vampire #ikevamp theo

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1stvioliner-fangirl · 7 years ago

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So, this is the fanfiction that I accidently deleted and had to rewrite. I took a comment’s suggestion and used written Kitten, check it out if you want to write your own fanfictions!

Rey never wanted to go back to Jakku. She never thought she would ever have to again.

The Millenium falcon flew through the atmosphere of the desert planet, letting off bursts of steam and debris as it heaved itself out of hyperspace. It was a miracle how the old ship could handle jumps through hyperspace so easily despite its age. Their position of interest was far from any town or village on the entire planet. The AT-AT that she used to call her home. The falcon landed sloppily,touching down too fast and sinking into the sand. The co-pilot beside her was the wookie known as Chewbacca or as the last owner of the falcon knew him, Chewie.

Chewie roared in wookie as Rey left the falcon's exit ramp, giving her hope in her search. She walked up to the old, discarded piece of junk left to rot in the sands only to notice that the door had been blown off. It wasn't something she didn't expect, she had expected raiders to come in looking for valuable items to take in order to make a profit. She walked up the ramp that led into the inside and jumped down into her old home. It was just as dusty and dirty as she had remembered, but many things of significance that she kept lying around were gone. Rey grabbed onto one of the many pipes within the robotic walker and pulled herself up onto what was once the walker's control panel.

Rey found that it hadn't been disturbed at all. The fighter pilot's helmet she kept from the resistance was still sitting on top of the controls. She used to like to put it on herself and pretend like she was with the resistance.

But now, that dream of flying through space to places far beyond was within her grasp. She could do whatever she wanted, go anywhere in the falcon's cockpit. Ever since being left on Jakku at the age of four, she had wanted that. To leave the junk planet behind and start new.

Rey reached to the top of the AT-AT where an air duct was and threw it open. Dust and sand pummled her, drowning her and leaving her coughing. She reached into the duct and pulled out a small crystal. When she was on Jakku, she had found it on the star destroyer near her home while she was searching for anything of value to sell in the nearest town of Niima Outpost. She held the crystal in her hand, memories coming back as a young, 12 year old girl who used it as a wishing rock. She would wish that her parents would come back, but now she knew that no matter how long she waited, they would have never come back for her.

Rey pocketed the rock and grabbed the fighter pilots helmet. She leapt down to the base of her home and found the dust and sand make its way into her eyes again. She rubbed them again, annoyed with her home's age.

Rey exited the AT-AT, heading towards the falcon before something caught her attention. A disturbance in the force. Coming from the opposite direction of the robotic walker. Rey walked into the falcon and into the cockpit, taking a seat in the pilot's chair. Chewie looked at her with concern seeing the worry in her face.

"We're making a stop." Rey said, turning on the ships controls. She put the thrusters into full drive as the ship lifted off of the ground. The falcon flew in the opposite direction of their last location. In the distance, rocky cliffs came into view surrounded by more sand.

As they flew over, the strange sensation became an entire ripple in the force. It was overwhelming and almost terrifying. They passed the entire valley before landing. The landing went a lot smoother than before, but it was still shaky.

Rey opened the exit ramp and climbed out. She looked above, seeing the massive amount of rock and sand around them before turning her focus to the valley in front of her. Seeing nothing of importance or caution, she started walking the distance of the nature made structure.

After a ten minute excursion, finding nothing worthy of investigating, she turned back to the direction of the falcon and started to walk back, putting her communicator up to her face and talked into it.

"Chewie start the falcon. We're leaving." She said, turning to look back one more time. Just as she stopped the communication, something caught her attention in the corner of her eye. Movement above on a pile of stone and rock. Rey, thinking it was a raider or thief, threw the hood of her cloak over her head, trying to conceal her identity. She started walking a little faster, preparing herself for the worst. She put her head down and went to start a communication once again. Just as she put the microphone to her head it was too late.

Rey saw multiple men coming out of the shadows and moving toward her. She reached into her holster and fumbled for the weapon she had concealed. She held it out in front of her in a defensive position. The men backed up a bit, realizing what it was. The lightsabers hilt was made not too long ago but it was still enough to scare anyone. Rey started backing up, keeping herself in a defensive position at all times.

Before she could recognize the figure behind her it was too late. She backed straight into him, flinching at his sheer strength in the force. Without turning, she started shaking, putting her lightsaber down and facing it towards him almost threateningly. She knew who it was before he even said a word. His presence in the force was much more powerful than any of his comrades.

"Hello there Rey." Kylo Ren said, his breath on her neck made the hair on it stand up. Not seeing him in the flesh for several years had made her somewhat surprised to hear his voice again. But it sounded much of the same, the same dark, overpowering, deep, and depressing tone to it.

Rey refused to turn around to face him, fearing that he would reach into her mind and make her feel a similar pain as the one on Takodana. She could feel his anger towards her, his desire to have her back, and his other conflicted emotions holding him back from tearing her to shreds. The knights of ren kept their distance from her, fearing a strike from her.

"There's no need to be afraid." Kylo said to his comrades. "The Jedi has no kyber crystal in her lightsaber. It's just an intimidation tactic. She has no real power here."

Rey looked down to the ground knowing that he was right. Since Luke's lightsaber had broken in the Supremacy's throne room, she hadn't been able to do anything except create the hilt to a new one. She had no idea where to look for a new kyber crystal since the one that Luke had used was shattered.

"How did you know where to find me?" Rey asked him, still unable to look him in the eye.

"It took us a good 3 years to track a multitude of ships thought to be in the resistance to a point. We managed to capture one of these ships and find the location of the millenium falcon. After that it was only a matter of finding you. We sent ripples through the force hoping to get you to this place where you had no chance of escaping us."

Rey turned her attention to the knights of ren who were shifting uneasily in the presence of their master with his overwhelming force abilities.

"You have no power here." Kylo said, moving his hand only inches away from her arm. "Come with us easily and you won't be punished immensely."

Rey forced herself to turn and face him, anger flooding into her voice. "Never!" She said taking a full look at him.

The force connections between them had been more verbal than physical. Most of the time she couldn’t see him and only hear his voice. She half expected him to be dressed in golden robes, a crown on top of his head and other ruler like qualities. But instead he was dressed exactly as she remembered him. Black clothing all around with a cape. His hair was much shorter, only going down to his chin line with a few loose pieces falling down in front of his eyes. His big ears were very exaggerated with this new look as they stood out without the big pieces of hair in front of them anymore. The scar she gave him on starkiller base was still plastered down the side of his face, it's red tint making it a focal point of concentration. He stared at her as if looking down on her and put his hand in front of her similar to what he did in the throne room. But before she could do anything else, the lightsaber flew out of her hand and into his own. This act caught her by surprise as she backed away from him a foot. The presence of the guards making her uncomfortable.

"You're unarmed and defenseless." Kylo said holding out the hilt of the blade to her mockingly. "Come with me."

Rey backed away from them, towards a wall of the valley looking for a possible escape. She tried desperately to try and stop them from surrounding her but it was no use. They moved towards her as slowly as she was backing up, as if they were playing a game with her. A few more feet and she finally hit the wall, backed into a corner with the knights of ren and their leader surrounding her from every direction. She put her hands to the wall, clawing them into the sides, desperate. Kylo walked towards her, his voice was soft and almost pleading.

"It's ok." He said softly "You don't need to fight me. Just come with me and you'll be ok." He held out his hand in front of her face before gently touching it with his open palm. She looked him straight in the eyes, seeing that beneath his dark and brooding mood there was a shed of light. After several years of isolation after the battle of crait, several force connections and visions had made his dark, depressing mood fade a bit. He didn't want to admit it but deep down he regretted everything that had happened. She noticed a pile of rocks behind them as she turned her eyes from him.

She pushed him away, grabbing her lightsaber from his hands and used the force to manipulate the rocks to her will. She ran past Kylo as he looked back in shock to the sudden commotion. Rey started climbing the pile to a stretch of stone that formed a ledge along the cliff side.

"Treat your wounds." Kylo said to his knights who were the ones most affected by the sudden avalanche. "I can handle this myself."

Rey fumbled inside of her pocket while moving as fast as she could across the somewhat narrow ledge. She took out the crystal and fumbled with the lightsaber hilt, trying to get the compartment open. She finally got it open, shoving the crystal into its small space, she shut it and tested it. The lightsaber lit up a bright white, illuminating the surroundings and casting a white light onto the cliffs walls. She saw that the ledge led to a patch of cliff that looked safe to climb. She grabbed onto one of the rocks and put her foot on another just below it. She continued this process until she was finally on top of the cliff. She looked around, seeing the flat plateau as a threat to her safety having nowhere to hide or protect herself with other than her weapon. She looked across the other side of the cliff and found Kylo standing on the exact opposite side that she was standing on. In between them was a walkway most likely used for traders to move between the cave systems that were most likely to be inside of the cliffs.

She took a step onto the walkway as Kylo did and continued. They both continued until they were only a few feet away from each other. Kylo had his lightsaber in hand as did Rey. However, his body language did not show any threat towards her.

"It's just us now." He said repeating his words he had said on star killer. "There's no one to help you or me. I saw the kyber crystal that you put into it, don't try to resist it. Fight me Jedi. And we can end this once and for all."

Rey stared at him, unable to keep her emotions at bay. Her hand with the lightsaber started shaking. Suddenly, she dropped it, it clattered to the ground of the platform making a sound that echoed throughout the canyon.

"No." Rey said refusing to accept his methods "Ben I won't fight you."

Ben's mouth was open slightly, making movements trying to say something, but he couldn't get it out.

"Pick it up Rey." He said quietly, his mouth barely moving

"No." She said, standing defiantly

"I SAID PICK IT UP!" He suddenly screamed at her, his eyes lighting up like a raging fire

She looked at him with sad eyes, neither of them wanting to let out any emotions.

"And what if I don't?" She asked him, staring at his lightsaber "Will you force it into my hands? Will you try and make me think this is what I want? Do you really want me to pick it up and face what you want my destiny to be?"

She stared at him, letting his emotions get into her head and making her say something she desperately didn't want to say.

"Strike me down Kylo Ren." She said crossing her arms around her cold body from being at such a high altitude. "It's the only way to become the monster you always wanted to be.

He stared at her in disbelief and disappointment. He let some of his emotions get in his way remembering all of their force connections after the battle of Crait. They had gotten more and more frequent as they continued growing as human beings. Over time Kylo had learned to look past some of his dark tendencies and look towards the light but now, as if everything that happened to them had disappeared, it had turned back to the way it was when they first met. All of the development he had went through with her, learning to care for another person, wanting to do anything to make that person happy, even offering her the entire galaxy, everything was gone in that very moment, he thought.

"A monster." He said looking down at her. "Is that what you really believe I always wanted?" He let his emotions get the better of him as a tear slid down his face "I never wanted this."

Rey looked at him in shock and in surprise, letting her emotions loose she also let a tear slide down her face.

"I just wanted someone. Anyone to treat me like I was worth something. That I meant something to someone. I wanted someone to see me as who I was. And at first I thought you saw that in me." He said, letting more tears slide down his face.

"You are that." Rey said to him, moving closer to him and taking his lightsaber into her hands. "You don't have to worry anymore. You are YOU to me. You're not Kylo Ren, you are Ben Solo. A powerful force user who has the power to make anyone follow his orders."

"Strike me down." Ben said, taking a complete turn from what she thought he would say

"What?" Rey asked shocked at his sudden change in mood

"I don't deserve forgiveness anymore." He said, pointing the lightsaber away from Rey and turning it on, planning to kill himself.

"Ben." Rey said, turning her focus from him to the lightsaber now shaking in his hand

"I can't go back." He said, the tears now making constant streak lines on his face "I can't be forgiven for all the things i've done. There's no future for a monster like me."

Rey stared into his closed eyes as he let his head sink down into his chest. Shaking all around, she grabbed the hilt of the lightsaber and pulled him closer to her.

"Yes there is." She said grabbing him by the arm which held no weapon. She had to stand on her toes to reach his giant stature. She slammed her lips into his as he opened his eyes just before the shocking showing of emotions.

There was no lust behind this gesture, no pity, there was just a pure release of feelings.

He thought of pulling away from her but stopped himself. He dropped the lightsaber to the ground and put his hand on the back of her head, grabbing it and pulling her closer.

She was the one to pull away. She pulled away before lowering her aim to his waist wrapping her arms around it, with his own awkwardly in front of him reaching out for her who wasn't there.

Her tears were spilling from her eyes making stains in his clothing.

He put his arms on her waist and lowered his and her body to the ground as they stood in the heat of the moment letting their emotions get the better of them.

"One with hope, Ben."

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