#deke dufresne

[lexi-the-twilight-dragon]

Sooooo I said I'd write a fic regarding my dream ending to S17, so of course I had to finish it before S17 came out. Holy shit this fic turned out much longer than I expected, but I'm not sure an increase in length = a increase in quality? I did it tho, so here it is.

BROTHER TO BROTHER

That's when Grif notices something he never has before.

FANDOM: Red vs Blue. S16 spoilers. RATING: Angst/Fluff. WORDS: 1736 CHARACTERS: Grif, Doc (He got smashed into a wall and walked away from an explosion completely unharmed in S8, I think he can survive falling off an at most 442m building), O'Malley (mentioned?), Huggins (please tell me she's not permanently dead, RT), Deke Dufresne, OCs

~

To say the whole time-travel-fix-the-past-nearly-fuck-up-the-universe adventure was insane is a serious understatement. They were only trying to get some pizza for fuck's sake!

And honestly, when it's all over, Grif doesn't know what to do. How do you avoid getting dragged into other people's bullshit? He used to think he was good at that, but not so much anymore. (Pretty much since Wash showed up, huh.)

But it's over, it's finally fucking over, and for at least the next hour, they're safe. And yes, that's a "they". His friends are assholes, but that doesn't mean he wants to lose any of them. Not anymore.

That's when Grif notices something he never has before, and he knows full well what trouble his and the others' lack of notice caused.

He notices a distinct lack of a certain color that was here a few minutes ago.

Purple.

~

He catches the medic disappearing through the hills a little ways away.

"Hey Doc!"

Doc hesitates for a split-second, but doesn't stop walking.

"Doc, wait up!"

Doc starts walking faster. Grif nearly loses him again in the twists and turns of the landscape.

He wonders if this is what it looked like when he quit.

"Frank, stop!"

It's a name no one's used in fuck knows how long. Grif isn't sure he's ever used it. The medic has been 'Doc' to everyone for so long that Grif hasn't the faintest idea why he even remembers his real name at all. But he says it.

And Frank stops.

"Where the hell are you going?" He doesn't say it like an accusation, because it isn't one.

"What does it matter where I'm going?" Frank replies, barely even turning his head, "All that matters is that I'm away from you."

"... You don't mean that."

"Yes, I do. As long as I'm far enough away from anyone I could endanger, I don't care what happens to me. Maybe I'll even find my own little dimension again. Anything to keep everyone safe."

"Doc- Frank, you can't blame yourse-"

"Yes I can!" Purple armor breaks the stillness to whirl around and face orange. "I can because it is my fault! I can't..."

His voice cracks, and the anger seeps out of him as he takes a breath.

"I can't control him anymore, Grif. Who knows how long it will be before he takes me over again. Before he uses me to hurt more people. To hurt, to kill, to destroy..."

His hand flies for his Magnum, and Grif grabs his rifle just as fast. He doesn't actually want to hurt Doc, but if O'Malley were to take control of him again...

The pistol skitters across the ground some feet away.

Frank's arm doesn't move from where he tossed it, his visor and likely gaze lowered to the ground, and when he speaks again the tears are audible.

"You can't... trust me anymore. I don't trust me anymore. I'm more monster than medic, now."

He raises his head, and sees the rifle still in Grif's hands. Grif instantly regrets his actions.

"Actually," Frank says, "yeah, that's a better idea."

He raises his hands a little over his head and faces Grif squarely.

"Can't hurt anyone if I'm dead."

Grif hates the tone in his voice. It's the tone of someone who has accepted, and embraced, the fact that he's going to die. He's heard it in Simmons' voice, in front of the firing squad. He's heard it in Sarge's, on the Staff of Charon. He's heard it in Bitters' more times than he'll ever be comfortable with.

He'll never forget hearing it in Private Mayhew's as she bled out in his arms after the colony massacre.

But acceptance and a request are very different things. Frank is asking for it, and he's asking Grif to be behind the trigger. His hands are shaking already.

In theory, it's to protect other, protect the others. And from how the purple-clad medic sounds, it's be a mercy kill, too. In reality...

"No," Grif says, reholstering his rifle, "I can't do that, Frank."

Grif doesn't need to see his face to see the crestfalled expression on it. "But... but Grif, I'm a danger to everyone, you have to-"

"I can't do it, man. I'm sorry."

"Please!"

Purple shin-plates hit the ground as their owner falls to his knees.

"Please.. I can't... take this anymore. Just... end it, please."

If there's a tone that Grif hates more that that of someone who's accepted death, it's that of someone begging for it.

He kneels in front of the medic and clasps onto his shoulders.

"Look, I don't know exactly what you've gone through. I haven't grappled an evil AI for nearly as long as you. I haven't been stuck in an alternate dimension. But I do know what it feels like when your worst enemy is in your own head. And you know that I know, because that's something else O'Malley did to you, isn't it? Forced memories of all the people it jumped through into your head? It's the only way you could have known what my childhood was like.

"You're not a monster, Frank. You're you. You're Doc. You're our dorky, health-obsessed, pacifistic medic. I can't kill a guy like you, split personality or not."

Frank's visor is locked with his for a grand total of two seconds after that before he wraps his arms around Grif's own shoulders and breaks down into sobs.

Grif doesn't know what'll happen from here. He doesn't know how or even if Doc can be helped at this point. But, also at this point, he can't bring himself to abandon the poor guy.

And maybe, it occurs to him as Huggins flies around the corner looking for them, maybe the past can be fixed after all.

~

Doc didn't know what to expect when the orange-clad soldier got up from their semi-hug to go whisper conspiratorially with the cosmic light-ball.

He knows even less what to expect when Grif goes and grabs the frickin' time gun O'Malley had betrayed him with earlier. Are they going to exile him after all, only in a different time period?

Grif wordlessly pulls the trigger, and gestures at Doc to follow him through.

Doc follows him through.

The first thing he notices is an astonishing amount of green. His entire view consists of trees, ferns and undergrowth that greatly mottles but doesn't completely obscure the sunshine. There's the constant chortle of birdsong and other animal noises that instantly tells him that this is Earth. And if he listens hard enough over it. he can hear the trickling sound of a river.

His blood runs cold when he recognizes exactly where and when Grif has brought him.

"Th-this is..."

His spluttering is cut off by a distant cry of "Deke!" and the sound of splashing.

Through the undergrowth, down on the river's edge, he can see them, see himself. Two coffee-skinned boys, brown hair plastered to their faces as the panicked elder drags the limp younger onto the bank.

"Deke! Deke, can you hear me? Please wake up!" Young Frank DuFresne is shouting, though his brother is held close to him. The boy didn't know what else to do.

He didn't know how to save him.

"What are you waiting for?" Grif's voice tears his gaze away.

"W-what?"

The orange soldier turns his head to look directly at him. "He needs a medic. Go."

Purple helmet looks to the riverbank, back to the orange, then is shoved into the other man's hands.

"Thank you."

He tears into a run, tossing aside all vegetation between him and the bank. Between him, himself, and his little brother.

"Hey!" He drops to his knees as the younger him looks up. He knows merely from memory that the river water dripping down his face is mixed with sting tears.

"I'm a medic. I can help. His name's Deke, right?"

Young Frank nods vigorously. "He's not breathing, what do I do?!"

Hearing himself the panicked, even in clearly justified circumstances, makes it hard to keep his own voice level.

"We need to get him up onto more solid ground, I can treat him there."

A further few feet gets them some firmer ground. Not by much, but Doc doesn't want to waste any precious time.

"Lay him down here."

His movements are calm and practiced as he placed one palm over Deke's chest. Call him an unqualified medic all you want, but he has never forgotten how to do CPR properly. And this right here is the exact reason why. Even if he's internally dealing with the whirlwind of emotions of reliving the worst day of his life. But he can change that.

He will change that.

Deke remains unresponsive after one, two, three, four rounds of compressions as Young Frank watches in wide-eyed concern. But after the fifth, Deke's eyes fly open, and Doc rolls him on his side so he can cough up the water dislodged from his lungs.

"Deke!" Young Frank looks ready to pounce atop his brother in delight, but the older one stops him.

"He needs an ambulance."

Young Frank nods, before scrambling off through the trees to what Doc knows is his childhood home, where his parents are probably sitting on the porch drinking tea and waiting for their boys to come back from playing in the forest. Funny how things seem from a different perspective.

~

It's decided that Meredith DuFresne should ride to the hospital with her son in the ambulance. Frederick and Frank will travel behind in the car. It may take some recovery, but the paramedics say he's likely to survive thanks to the timely response.

Deke will survive. It's a dream come true in so many ways.

"Hey, mister!"

Young Frank catches the man in purple as he walks away.

"What's your name?"

The man looks at oddly for a second, then smiles.

"My friends call me Doc. I'm... a travelling medic."

The boy smiles back, then wraps his arms around the man's purple armor.

"Thank you, Doc."

Doc ruffles his hair, "Just some simple CPR. Might be a good thing for you to learn, huh?"

Frank looks up at him. Funny, Doc looks a lot like his father. Maybe he's a cousin or something?

"I will. I promise."

He lets go, and the man in purple disappears back into the forest.

~

A/N: Guess who jumped head first onto the Doc-Love Train with the recent season? Not that I ever disliked Doc, but being brutally honest, he was never really around long enough for me to get as attached to him as I was to the other Blood Gulch Crew. Season 16 tho... my jaw nearly hit the floor with his backstory monologue. It puts everything about his character in a whole new light. Why is there hardly anything about it on the interned? There needs to be more about it on the internet. So here's my piece. Even if I'm not completely happy with it.