#decent taste in liquor. was willing to bring a cat across national borders.

[the-everqueen]

Okay last one I pinky promise

fuck/marry/…get a drink with

Steve Murphy/Donald Pierce/Corinthian

(no ty Shaw, that’s too easy!)

Ty Shaw is baby, i'd marry that man and we'd be the weird poly couple that hosts "dinners" that are also orgies. of course he's the easy option.

once more, we are fucking Pierce. idk i think i could make that man cry. or give him a crisis. would he be sexist about it? yeah. would i be offended? not really. am i his type? also probably not but this is how we'd just end up doing hand stuff while talking shit about work. he seems like a great person to do a bitch fest with.

i'd marry the Corinthian. hear me out. there are no tax benefits BUT i'm poly and a permissive dog owner. is marriage even "real" if it's to one of the Major Arcana? idk, but it'd be funny to give Dream a conniption about it. also i'm assuming this nets me some kind of immortality deal because what's Dream going to do, vet a partner for his nightmare every 60-100 years? qualities in my favor: indeterminate gender, gay, high pain tolerance. my student evals have said that i am a good listener who's engaging in one-on-one but that i also have high standards for grading. also i have religious trauma so we could bond about weird complicated relationships to god. perks for me: a literal nightmare to unleash on annoying faculty members. also someone who can maybe talk to whoever is behind the recurring teeth-falling-out dreams. like, what's up with those.

i would get a drink with Steve. i think he's a little too old-fashioned to fuck, though i might be his type in dudes (short, thicc, Latino). but i get the vibes he'd try to be like, a "gentleman" at me because That Is A Woman and i ain't about that. i do think i could impress him with my taste in mezcal. i'm a total lightweight but he wouldn't take advantage.