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yinyuedijun · 6 months ago

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ZERO-SUM GAME

It’s different with Aventurine. You like being his luxury hand watch. You like being his elegant knife, his liar’s dice, his pretty poker chip. You want to be his object—the object of his affections, something he can parade around just like his expensive suits and his beautiful jewellery and his ostentatious furs. Look at me, he uses them to say. Look at what I own. Look at what I own despite this code on my neck. Look at what I've won despite my eyes and my blood. (Or: Aventurine wins you in a game of poker. He decides to cash out his prize right then and there—to enjoy you on the card table, laid out among all the chips and cards.)

8.6k words of psychological issues, explicit smut, and deranged characterization. aventurine tops, reader bottoms. public sex, voyeurism from strangers, piv, oral (reader receiving), fingering with gloves on, creampie. mild dubcon but the reader is ultimately into it. afab gn reader, they are playing a fem-coded role for an espionage assignment (dress, heels, makeup). themes of objectification. discussion of slavery and sa during slavery (not explicit). dead dove do not eat, mdni.

You are in the grandest casino of Kinyoshi Moon Colony, and Aventurine is running your latest husband into life-ruining debt.

You aren’t cut up about it. If your marriage (or concubinage, rather) were genuine, you'd maybe be annoyed about the loss of capital. But as it is, this relationship is an assignment from the IPC—one of the longest and most excruciatingly boring yet. Fortunately for you, Aventurine’s presence tonight means that you've finally gathered enough intel for Diamond’s needs. It is time for the IPC to terminate your latest contract, and Aventurine is here to collect you.

Which is a little funny, given your relationship. It is strange sitting across from your boyfriend, draped over another man and thoroughly ignoring him. You’re entirely focused on fawning over your husband instead—laughing into his ear, lighting his pipe and filling his whiskey glass, and oh, Mister Li, you're so funny, you're so clever, I think you should go all in!—but Aventurine doesn't react. He only smiles at the two of you, like he isn't bothered by the sight.

This is, of course, an act: when you came home from your last marriage (assignment), he'd made sure to pleasure you so thoroughly that you forgot all about your ex-husband (mark). Aventurine did not openly admit to any kind of jealousy at the time, but you could tell he hadn't been keen on letting another man touch you. He usually isn't too keen about anyone touching any of his things, in fact. Despite appearances, he always abhors the thought of losing anything important.

But any fears he might have are concealed right now. They’re always concealed. Hidden by the expensive suit, the countless stacks of chips, the golden walls and high-vaulted ceilings of the Venetian Zhijin, Masked by his generous gifts, his easy laughter, his careless frivolity. You can see right through his gilded smile. The rest of the table cannot.

They are all intrigued when Aventurine asks, a playful lilt in his voice, “How about we make this game a little more interesting, gentleman?”

The other players at the table consider him. The other plus-ones—concubines, courtesans, gigolos, and so on—look at him with calculated expressions of cursory interest. You do so as well, but only for a moment. Your gaze quickly returns to Mister Li’s face—your husband is meant to be your true focus, after all, not the game. You are not a player at this table, but an accessory. Closer to an expensive watch than a human being.

Some business magnate from the Triangulum Galaxy leans back and raises a brow. “I'm listening,” he says. You watch a bead of sweat travel down your husband’s neck.

“How about we up the ante,” Aventurine says, his voice light, “but instead of betting more money this time, we bet our dates?”

You think, in other star systems, other worlds, such a suggestion would invite riot. But Kinyoshi Colony being what it is, and the Venetian being the establishment that it is, the other players at the table only laugh. Nearly half of them deal in the trade of human beings anyway—this is nothing novel for them.

“Well,” one of them says, “it’s not like winning more money’s gonna make a difference to any of us.” A round of chuckling. He turns to his date—some noblewoman from Jarilo-IV who seems greatly out of her depth—and says, “What do you think, love? How do you feel about being part of my wager?”

She doesn't like it. She clearly doesn't like it, and she also clearly doesn't know how to say it. Were you not on the clock, you might intervene. Maybe. As it is, though, all you can do is observe quietly. All the power in this gambit lies with Aventurine. Even when surrounded by men who manipulate the wealth of entire cities, planets, galaxies—he remains in full control.

“There’s never any shame in folding,” he says, magnanimous. Then he looks your husband in the eye, smiling conspiratorially. “But I know there are some of us who aren't afraid to take risks.”

Li laughs. “You’re right about that, Mister Aventurine.” He gives you a fond smile. And of course he does—you’re his last shot at winning back all his losses for the night. “I think you'd make a pretty little chip, don't you?”

Although Mister Li is clearly less distressed at the thought of betting you than he was at the thought of betting his company just last round, you notice, out of the corner of your eye, a muscle in Aventurine’s neck twitching. It’s very, very subtle, and he'd have never let himself do it if the table’s attention were on him, but he did it. Perhaps it was involuntary. Your mouth curls.

“Sure, darling.” You try not to sound too giddy. “I’ll be whatever you like.”

Ordinarily, you wouldn't be so happy about this farce. This is, put plainly, a stupid way to extract you from your mission. Were the cards in anyone else’s hands, your husband could win and you might be stuck with him for another several weeks, at least—assuming that you aren't discovered and killed first. Or you could go home with another man and be subjected to the kind of things that men do when they trade human beings, and you don't think the IPC would care too much if you were. You are an asset before you are a person, after all. At this table, you are closer to an expensive watch than a human being—and at the Company, you are an overpriced knife.

But to Aventurine, you're a chip in one of his games, and you don't mind that so much. Men who only know wealth will throw around their riches thoughtlessly, but men who have endured poverty will hold onto them tightly—desperately. Aventurine takes care of his luxury watches, his elegant knives, his liar’s dice. His capital. And he never loses anything. He always comes to collect. You trust him to collect you, even with this stupid plan, so you are calm as you watch the dealer shuffle the cards.

The table makes their bets. Most of the players go all-in. A couple fold, perhaps feeling some degree of concern for their partners, but it's more likely that they just have shit hands. A lot of the ones who continue playing have shit hands anyway. Your husband doesn't do too badly—a straight flush. He seems confident.

Then Aventurine lays out his cards. Ten. Joker. Queen. King. Ace.

All hearts.

You have to take a sip of your whiskey to stop yourself from laughing.

Aventurine, himself, has the grace not to look too smug about the outcome. Or maybe it's very unremarkable for him, all these winnings being pushed over to him—poker chips and human beings. Some of the other dates are clearly anxious as they move toward him (they are expected to be loyal to their husbands), and some are clearly excited (they are expected to be frivolous, hedonistic playthings). He humours them all, for a little while. Puts on the usual show as they crowd around him, charms them because it'll be good for business partnerships in case any of their husbands care even a little bit about them. You'd do the same in his shoes. But in your current ones (six-inch heels, black leather, red bottoms, luxury), all you can do is seat yourself on the card table and light up a cigarette. Waiting.

Aventurine eventually sends them all off. All I wanted was to get to know you, he says cheerfully, which is probably not a lie. After they leave, he asks the dealer to close the table and go on break. Turn a blind eye. You raise a brow when they obey him.

How interesting.

You're still enjoying your cigarette by the time he turns to you. You flash him a smile, one of the ones that you use for work. His expression doesn't change, but his thumb brushes against one of his many rings—switching off your synesthesia beacons for some privacy—and he leans back to study you. You know he's admiring you, but it could be mistaken for a leer.

“Well, well,” he says, “If it isn’t the esteemed concubine of Li Fengzhi.”

“The esteemed fifth concubine,” you correct. He hums, looking surprised.

“I thought you were the fourth. Did I misremember?”

“No, just misinformed. He took another concubine right before I arrived on Kinyoshi. He acquired a sixth just last week. Turns out he picks up paramours like they’re strays.”

“How inconvenient.”

“It made no difference to me,” you dismiss. “I’m his favourite anyway, but I’m sure you knew that already.”

“I’d have had to be blind not to notice it. You have the man wrapped around your finger.” Aventurine leans back, studying you as you smoke on your perch. “But before we continue—why don’t you come a little closer, esteemed Fifth Concubine?”

You make a face. “That title doesn’t sound as nearly as flattering in Avgin dialect as it does in Zhijinese,” you note, though you get off the table anyway. You don’t go very far, electing to seat yourself on his lap, your arms draping around his shoulders. The feathers of his jacket tickle at your bare shoulders; the satin of his gloves glide down the skin of your thighs before settling on your calves. “Since you’ve won my company for the night, though,” you sigh, “I suppose I can humour you, Mister Aventurine.”

“Lucky me.” He leans in, his breath sweeping the shell of your ear. His fragrance surrounds you, your body warming at the familiar scent of ambergris and vanilla. You realize, all of a sudden, how much you missed it. You have to stop yourself from pressing your face into his neck and melting—it would be a dead giveaway for your identity and also too revealing of your feelings. Aventurine might be endeared by it, but he might also find it disconcerting. He often needs to be tricked into intimacy.

He does enjoy being wanted though, and he can obviously tell that you want him. He pulls you closer, one of his hands giving your thigh a generous squeeze. It makes you throw your head back in a laugh, exposing the soft skin of your throat. You aren't surprised when he takes the opportunity to kiss it, his lips gentle against your pulse.

“You’re being very forward,” you tease him. “Did you miss me?”

“I’m just trying to be careful,” he defends himself between kisses, his breath warm on your skin. “We should try to conceal our mouths as much as possible. No one can intercept our synesthesia beacons, but someone could still read our lips.”

You give him a funny look. “We’re the only two speakers of Avgin in the known universe. Who could, other than ourselves, could read our—mmph…”

Aventurine has caught the rest of your sentence with his mouth. He’s hungry and wanting for you, the heat of his lips overwhelming. Your tongue is as practised as his, but you find yourself too distracted by your thrill to focus, your kiss wet and eager. Messy. Unprofessional.

You’ve never kissed any of your husbands like this. You’ve never kissed any of your other owners like this. You feel dazed when he pulls away.

You compose yourself. “So you did miss me.”

He smiles. “Guilty as charged.” A gloved hand rests on your face, satin tracing your lips. “How could I not? You’ve been away from the house for so long.”

Your eyes narrow. There’s no idiom for this in Avgin, so you flip briefly to Interastral Standard: “Pot, kettle, black. You leave home all the time.” You smack away the hand at your waist, petty. He looks amused. “And you almost always die.”

He switches out his smile for a pout. “Don’t tell me you’re still mad about last time.”

“You nearly got yourself blasted with atomics, so yes, I’m still mad at you.”

Now he’s frowning. “Am I going back to sleeping on the couch when you come back?”

“Yes,” you say. His deepening frown is meant to be read as a joke, but you know better. Deciding to throw him a bone, you lean in, whispering playfully into his ear: “You can still fuck me on it though.”

Aventurine hums, as if considering. His hands traverse your sides as he contemplates your suggestion. You move to straddle him, your thighs squeezed around his hips. When you grind against him, you can feel how much he wants you despite his composure, his control—his length straining in his pants, pressed against the silk covering your core.

“I don’t think I can wait long enough to fuck you on the couch,” he says, voice teasing.

“No?” You hum as his hands travel upward, feeling every inch of you. “The ship on the way home, then?”

“We don’t leave until tomorrow. Do you really think I can wait that long?”

You don't expect to feel the warmth of his hands on your chest. Your breath hitches when he starts palming your tits through your dress, neon eyes admiring the curve of them. One of his thumbs skims over the peak of your breast, and his mouth curls when your nipple hardens. “No bra? That's convenient.”

“I—” You squirm in his grip, whining. It just makes you grind against his lap more, your cunt moving against his slacks. A wave of heat runs through your lower half, and you clench around nothing. You can see people from a nearby table glancing at you, doing double takes. You can feel their lingering gazes on you, and you know Aventurine can too.

“I—are you going to”—your voice shakes as he pinches your nipple, as his other hand moves to squeeze your ass instead. Your dress is short—designed for easy access—and his fingertips easily skim the underside of its skirt. You wonder if he’s going to pull it up. You wonder if he's going to go even further than that.

But that would be an absurd thing to do in the middle of the busiest casino in the colony, which also happens to be the busiest trade hub in its star system. It would be absurd even for the two of you. Nevermind the reactions of the other players in the room—the staff here would immediately blacklist you, and so would every other gambling house in Kinyoshi.

You try to calm yourself. “Are you—ah—going to take me upstairs?”

He's fully kneading your breasts now. You can feel your clit throbbing, your body responding to his rough and unrepentant touch. “Hm… I don't think I want to.” Aventurine’s voice drops. His smile takes on a distinctly wicked quality. “I think I'll take you right here.”

“But we’ll get kicked out,” you whine. Even as you protest though, you're panting and moving your hips now. Grabbing at his arms, rutting against him like you're in heat. His fingers hook around the thin straps of your dress, pull them down your shoulders, already starting to indulge despite your reservations. You bend into his touch.

“Kicked out? By who? The staff?” He smiles, as always. “I own the place now. I don't think they'll be giving me trouble.”

“Y—you what?” For a moment, you're too shocked to keep up the wanton show. “You do? Since when?”

“Since last night.” He thumbs one of the straps that's fallen halfway down your arms. The rest of your dress threatens to come down with it. “Technically it's the IPC who acquired it—or, well, their shell company did—but I'm their designated representative here. I signed the contract.”

“The IPC isn’t going to be upset that you're fucking a concubine, who's not even your concubine, on their new property?”

Aventurine shrugs. “They know the kind of establishment the Venetian is. People gamble with humans here all the time, you know, so this has definitely happened before. The IPC definitely expects it to happen again. And besides”—he returns his attention to your dress, starting to slip the fabric down your shoulders—“I'm just cashing out my winnings. I'm sure they wouldn't deny a gambler his vices. That'd be bad business.”

You want to say more, but then he tugs, suddenly exposing you. You’re bare in front of him—in front of everyone. You can feel eyes on you. Heat curls in your gut as he grabs your tits again, his satin gloves smooth across your skin, and your nipples pebble beneath them. “Hm… much better.”

“But…” You bite your lip, glancing around. There are so many people watching now—so many voyeurs, who've forgotten about their games and their slots. Though there are a greater number of people who are continuing as usual, studying their hands, smoking their cigarettes, unperturbed. All regulars and VIPs, you know from your intelligence.

Aventurine pauses as you catalogue the room, raising a brow. Probably he's surprised at your sudden modesty; you usually have none when his touch is involved.

“Of course,” he adds, “if you'd rather enjoy the suite upstairs…”

“No—I don’t mind staying down here… it's just that I’ve never…”

Your voice trails off. Your eyes traverse the space again. There are people who’ve fully thrown their cards down, greedily drinking in the sight of you instead. Even some of the dealers are watching between hands, glancing at you instead of watching for cheaters. Like this is public entertainment, like you're a show.

Aventurine tilts his head.

“You've never had sex with an audience?” he guesses. He sounds surprised—perplexed. You don't know why. You know he knows it's a stupid question. You know he knows the answer.

You had sex in front of people all the time before you met him. You did it for the exact reasons that he’s almost certainly done the same. To this table of business magnates, you are closer to an expensive watch than a human being; to the IPC, you are more like an overpriced knife; to this gambling hall, you're an interesting sideshow.

To your captors who fucked you in public, you guess you were something like a toy.

The thought sitting in your mouth is this: you've never had sex with an audience and enjoyed it. It was painful—not painful for the heart or the mind or anything else sentimental, but painful like it felt you were a fish being gutted open by a knife. And even beyond that physical pain, you simply didn't enjoy being passed around. You didn't like being owned by those people. You didn't like being an object for their entertainment, a spectacle to be consumed.

But it's different with Aventurine. You like being his luxury hand watch. You like being his elegant knife, his liar’s dice, his pretty poker chip. You like being his plaything, spread for his viewing whenever he wants. You want to be his object—the object of his affections, something he can parade around just like his expensive suits and his beautiful jewellery and his ostentatious furs. Look at me, he uses them to say. Look at what I own. Look at what I own despite this commodity code on my neck. Look at what I've won despite my eyes and my blood.

You want him to own you too. You want him to show everyone that he won you, that he bought you, that you're his possession now. That he, and he alone, is free to treat you like a toy.

You're getting wetter just thinking about it.

“Nevermind,” you whisper. “Let's do it.”

His smile widens ever so slightly. Slyer than usual.

“Good,” he says. He guides you into standing. “Let’s get you settled then.”

You're seated back on the card table. The cigarette is forgotten in the ashtray next to you. Aventurine takes the time to straighten out your dress, lifting the straps back up and affording you some modesty—before he gently lays you out.

You look up at him as you're spread in front of him, laid out next to his royal flush and winnings. Like you're another chip in his stacks, the most expensive one. He puts a hand beneath your leg, drapes it over his shoulder. He takes the opportunity to kiss your calf, his lips delicate.

You glance at the tables around you. You watch the business owners and politicians as they watch Aventurine. You watch them as they watch your boyfriend pepper kisses up your leg, unless he's settling in between them. Your thighs spread easily for him, and you don't resist as he hikes up your skirt.

Then he frowns.

“I’ve never seen these panties before.”

“They’re new,” you relay.

“From your husband?”

“Yup.”

“I see.”

You can't see his face, but he sounds distinctly displeased. You expect him to complain, to say they're not expensive enough or not designer enough or just plain ugly.

You don't expect him to tear them right off.

“Aventurine?!”

You're so surprised you sit up, just in time to see him throw tatters of silk to the floor.

“What?” He looks up at you, expression unbothered, almost mild. “It wasn't your colour.”

Your mouth opens. “But it was still very nice!”

“I'll buy you nicer ones later. I’ll buy you a whole drawer of nicer ones later, when we’re done here.”

He looks down again, humming. Your cheeks flush as he spreads your legs again, baring your glistening sex to him—this time completely bare. Satin glides along the inside of your thighs, and your breath hitches when he reaches their apex. You feel the light touch of a finger along your opening, and you feel your body responding, tightening around nothing.

“Tell me,” he says, “What else did your husband do with you?”

His voice is casual, almost disinterested, but you know Aventurine is listening carefully.

“Not much,” you answer truthfully. “I haven't cum in months, you know.”

“Oh?” He sounds surprised. “You don't have sex with him?”

“No. He's fucked me a lot. It”—you whimper, pausing when you feel his fingers spreading you open, fluttering hole and swollen clit exposed to him—“it just wasn't very good.”

“Then”—you feel a thumb press against your clit, and you swallow—“he never touched you here?”

“N-no.”

“Stupid of him.” He’s drawing slow, lazy circles into the bud now, making you squirm on the table. You press yourself eagerly toward his familiar touch, having desperately missed it for months. Aventurine, perhaps sensing your neediness, asks, “And you didn't touch yourself?”

“He didn't let me,” you whine, and now he's frowning at you.

“I knew I should have gotten you out of there sooner,” he says, and you have to bite back a laugh. Aventurine’s mouth curls at the sound, and he leans in to place a kiss on your thigh. “But that’s fine. I'll make it up to you now.”

Aventurine kisses are soft and precise. They pepper a path up your thigh while his fingers continue to play lazily with your clit. You want—need—to feel something inside you, but he doesn't oblige. His fingers merely run along your entrance, teasing your dripping pussy with luxury satin, and that's all they do, even as your hips buck needily toward him.

He pauses for just a moment. When you look at him, you see him staring at you—at the brand on your inner thigh, the commodity code that your captors left on you, branding you as a product to be used and sold.

His voice is almost soft when he asks, “And what did your husband say when he saw this?”

“He never did,” you reply. “He always fucked me from behind. And he never went down on me.” You pause, thinking about the way he spoke of his business. Of his trade partners. Of what your captors had done to your home when you told him about it, feigning intimacy only to be matched in cruelty. You think about the way he fucked you, how it felt to be gutted open on his expensive, silk sheets.

None of it matters to you, really. This is behaviour that you’ve long accepted, that your body always anticipates. But you always like to offer Aventurine intimacy, whether real or feigned, whether he returns it equally or responds with undeserved cruelty: “I think it wouldn't have bothered him if he had noticed it.”

You can't see Aventurine’s eyes, but you can feel his reaction when he places a chaste kiss on your product code.

“I should have gotten you out of there sooner,” he repeats. Then he pauses. “Maybe I shouldn't have let you go at all.”

“I didn't mind,” you say. You aren't lying. “You gave me up for a reason.”

He stands. Cups your face with a palm, luxuriant fabric and gold rings pressed against your skin. Sometimes he's given up the aventurine stone temporarily for assignments, parting with it in elaborate gambles that he always manages to win. The way he’s touching you now reminds you of the way he holds the gem whenever it returns to his hand.

“Well,” he says, “I’m sorry it took so long to get you back.”

Aventurine tilts your chin up for a kiss. You meet it eagerly, and it's so tender in its familiarity that every memory of your husband fades. There's only Aventurine, and his gentle mouth, and the way his hands slide your dress down again, how he palms your breasts again. How he teases one nipple with his expensive rings until you're moaning into his mouth. How his other hand travels down until his gloved hand is cupping your heat. You drag your hips against his touch, desperately seeking some kind of friction, your wetness drenching the cloth. Your cunt clenches around nothing, your body aching to be filled by him, aching in a way that it does for no one else.

It’s one of the most addictive feelings you've ever known.

Aventurine only stops touching you so he can push away all the chips, clearing space on the table. He ignores the cacophony as countless stacks fall over, not sparing the plastic coins a single glance. Like you're the only prize that matters to him, even though the sum of his winnings come out to more than you ever were worth.

He lays you out on the table again, flat on your back, exposed, before kissing a path down your body—your neck, your breasts, your stomach, between your thighs. He deigns to give your product code one more kiss, his lips so gentle that it makes you tremble—and then he finally puts his mouth on you. He licks a hot stripe from your dripping pussy up to the crest of your sex, and your eyes close in bliss.

If you felt any uncertainty before this, it's completely gone now. Your hands ghost over your tits, playing with them as Aventurine’s tongue plays with you. He sucks on your neglected clit, fingers squeezing your thighs, keeping you spread open and still for him. He presses in, lets you drag your cunt over his greedy mouth and grind your clit against his face. Heat and pressure coil tight in your belly as he pleasures you, your body flushing with the kind of bliss only Aventurine can give you. You’re so lost in it that you almost don’t notice how quiet the rest of the hall has gotten, the cacophony of chatter and slot machines oddly subdued—almost missing. In their absence, the obscene noises that Aventurine is drawing from your mouth and body are louder than they should be.

The pleasure in your belly is just starting to swell when he pulls away. You give him a pleading look as he leans over you, but before you can start begging for more, you feel his fingers press against your heat. He watches you with keen eyes as he starts rubbing your pussy, maybe enjoying the desperate noises you make at his touch. You buck your hips, moaning as your clit and entrance grind against the fabric of his gloves, seeking friction. You’re empty, aching, desperate to be filled, but you think you can finish like this, just by rutting against his satin fingers—

Aventurine withdraws his hand, and you whine.

“No,” you beg, “please, please keep going, I was getting close—”

He raises a brow, feigning surprise. “Keep going?” He brings up his hand, shows you his gloves. The satin is soaked, shiny and stained with your slick. “I don't think I should. Look at what a mess you’ve made of my gloves.” Aventurine hums, frowning. “These are designer, you know. And limited—there are only 95 pairs of these in the whole universe. And you're ruining them.”

“I'm sorry,” you say, mind so fogged with lust that you can't even return his teasing. “I'm sorry, I'll make it up to you, I'll do anything, just—just let me cum—”

“Anything?” His smile is sly.

“Anything.”

“Well. I suppose if you help me clean this up, I wouldn't mind rewarding you with more.”

You don't need to ask what he means by that. When he holds out his hand to you, runs a finger along your lips, you obediently open your mouth for him. Your tongue slides along the wet satin, only making his glove messier—but he seems not to mind. He merely watches intently as your tongue cleans his fingers, taking in the obscene image of you hungrily lapping your own slick off the expensive fabric.

He lets you ruin his glove thoroughly before finally drawing back, peeling it off.

“I'm not sure that did any good,” he says, frowning. “I’ll probably need to buy a new pair. But”—he pulls away, and you feel him settle between your legs again, his hands spreading them. “I'll still reward you for the effort.”

Aventurine is quick about getting his mouth back on you. His tongue is hot on your skin, expertly teasing your clit. You feel his fingers running along your entrance again, growing sticky with his need. He laughs when you press your hips toward his hand, desperate to be filled.

Then he's pressing his bare fingers into your heat, and your back is arching off the table.

The moan you let out is obscene. It only gets worse when his fingers curl, making the pressure in your belly even heavier. Utterly shameless, you beg for him as he fucks you with his fingers: Aventurine, please, please, I need more, please, I'm so close, I'm so close.

As if taking pity on you, his mouth finds your clit again, his fingers pressing into your sweet spot at the same time. And he doesn't let up, pushing into it even when you think you can't take anymore—tongue swirling against your overstimulated bud, fingers making you gush uncontrollably. You practically sob when you cum, a noise of desperation that echoes in the gambling hall.

His smile looks a little fonder than usual—or maybe just entertained—as he stands again and leans over you. You taste your own release in a messy, open-mouthed kiss, and he strokes your face when he pulls away.

“So good for me,” he praises. “Are you going to let me do more?”

You nod eagerly. “Whatever you like,” you say, all sense of shame gone from your body, “and however you want.”

Aventurine’s mouth curls. “Your husband fucked you from behind, right? Why don't you bend over for me, then? Let's show him how he should have been doing it.”

You see the diamond pupils of Aventurine’s eyes glance off to the side, where, sure enough, your husband is spectating with some of his business partners. You force yourself to turn away before you can smile, hiding your expression from the other men. You’re not meant to derive any real pleasure from any of this, let alone pleasure of the vindictive kind. Your relationship with Aventurine is supposedly nothing but a gambler and his newly won, human plaything. It would be suspicious if you appeared to be anything else.

You slink off the table in a distinctly performative way, and Aventurine plays equally into the show—probably an act as familiar to him as it is to you. He guides you into turning around, your eyes falling on the scattered cards on the tabletop, the casino’s eyes falling on you. His hands waste no time in pulling down your dress and reaching around to knead your breasts, in full view of the rest of the gambling hall. You're only vaguely aware of your audience now, registering the interested, hungry stares, but not really caring. You're too focused on the way that Aventurine is tugging and twisting at your nipples, at how he’s pressed up against your ass, his cock straining through his pants. You grind needily against him, whining.

Aventurine kisses your shoulder. “Poor thing. You've been neglected for so long, haven't you?” His hands retreat, and you hear the sound of a zipper being undone. Then your skirt’s being pushed up and you're being bent over, your dripping pussy fully presented to him. When you feel the press of his cockhead against your entrance, you desperately try to push yourself back onto him. But he doesn't allow you to—only running the tip along your wet folds, still sticky from your release, while he stills you with a gentle touch on your hip.

You make a pathetic, desperate noise. Aventurine chuckles, though there’s now a breathy quality to his voice.

“Be patient,” he chides. “I'll take care of you.”

You know he will. He always takes care of you, in a way that no one else ever has. Even when he gambles your life for some mission, even when he can barely afford you the barest hints of intimacy, even when he displays your body to an audience of slave traders and murderers—he always takes care of you. Even if you are only a knife or a wristwatch or a chip in one of his games, he still treats you like you're worth holding onto.

Aventurine finally moves. Your eyes flutter shut as you feel his cock sliding into you. Usually he needs to be careful after your long missions away from him, knowing you'll be tense. He understands that your body always anticipates being in pain after being touched by other people. But he has you so worked up right now—still dripping from your release, still pliant from his fingers, still eager to please him before the crowd—that your cunt easily swallows his length. The stretch is pure bliss, pleasure unfurling in your body as you're filled up properly for the first time in months. He's just as affected as you, breath shaking as he bottoms out.

“Fuck,” he breathes—laughs. “Nearly forgot how good this feels.” He pauses, his breathing slowing—almost stopping each time you squeeze around him. You turn back, throwing him a pleading glance, and he meets it with an endeared smile. “Eager today, aren't you?” He hums, a hand sliding along your waist. “You really do need to be properly fucked.”

He's stalling. Trying to give you a moment to adjust, but you don't need it. “Yes,” you encourage him. Aching for the press of his cock against your walls, you grind against him, and you hear a strangled groan as you force him to move inside you. “Please, Aventurine—please, please fuck me, I need it so badly—”

He hums, both hands grabbing your hips, his fingers sinking into you. “Well. Since you asked so nicely.”

The first thrust has your eyes going wide, your hands reaching for the card table as you’re forced to bend over. You spread our palms next to the mess of heart cards and shiny tokens, bracing yourself for the way your body’s about to be used. He doesn't give you time to breathe after, each stroke filling you deep and fast. The rest of the gambling hall grows very, very quiet as Aventurine fucks you, and suddenly all you can hear is the appreciative murmur of the crowd, clink of ice cubes in aged whiskey, the noisy flick of lighters as more patrons opt to pause their games and enjoy the show. You hear the shattering of all the stacks beside you, hundreds of thousands of dollars in chips fall over beside you, tokens clinking as they roll across the tabletop. But all of that is soon drowned out by the wet noise of your pussy being fucked open, the squelch of your slick around his cock. You moan each time he bottoms out, eager to be filled.

When you feel his cock press into your sweet spot, your moans quickly turn into cries.

You hear something like a breathy laugh from Aventurine. Your body always reveals itself so easily to him, and you know he enjoys it. He hits that spot again and again, builds an agonizing tension in your body with every thrust of his hips. It has your pussy gushing around him, your thighs growing wet and sticky with your need.

Just when it feels like you can't take anymore, he reaches down and presses his fingers against your throbbing clit. Your knees buckle as he toys with you, chest heaving against the table as he sets a brutal pace. You're—overwhelmed, mind going hazy as you're fucked mercilessly. So far gone, you can hardly register the disgruntled expression of your husband, the hungry gazes of his companions, the way that other players are starting to shift in their seats, palming themselves at the sight of your pussy being split open. There's only the tight coil in your gut, the chips between your fingers as you grab uselessly for something to ground you, the cock that's filling you over and over and over—and oh fuck, you’re going to cum, you're really going to cum after being won in a game, from having your pussy used like a sleeve, from being watched by men who will never own you no matter how many times they trade you, no matter how many times they fuck you, no matter how many times they pass you around, because you'll only ever belong to Aventurine—

Your orgasm crashes through your body, and you sob.

It's a broken, blissed out noise. Your pussy is equally shameless, gushing as you pulse around Aventurine’s cock. You go limp as he fucks you through your orgasm, uncaring about the mess you're making. He only groans as you squirt all over him, hips stuttering as he reaches his own peak—spilling himself inside you, pumping you full. Aventurine’s body slumps over yours as rides out his high, his face pressing into your shoulder. You find the wherewithal to shift yourself, just enough to your lips against the tattoo on his neck. He looks at you for a fleeting moment, the blue ring of his eyes electric on you, before capture your mouth in a desperate, messy kiss.

The two of you stay there for a long moment, panting into each other. Then Aventurine collects himself, remembers how to talk: “Fuck.”

You piece yourself together just as easily. Maybe even faster. Smiling into his mouth, you ask, “Enjoy yourself?”

“Clearly.” Aventurine presses his lips into your neck, lingering only briefly. “Can you walk?”

“I think so.”

Aventurine takes his time with moving, as if basking in the afterglow—or bragging in it. But he does rise, eventually. Pulls out slowly, making you shudder. He helps you to your feet, lets you hold onto him for support. His spend drips down your thighs as you right yourself, messy and hot on your skin. You can feel it sliding down your legs as you walk, braced against Aventurine as he guides you in the long walk toward the elevator. It slips all the way down to your calves, to your expensive heels, even onto the marble floor.

You're fairly certain that it's not an accident when Aventurine flips up your skirt as you pass your ex-husband. At the very least, it isn't a mistake when you stumble in that same moment, bending over and giving him a good look at your well-used pussy, now overfilled with your boyfriend’s cum. You don't stop to look at him, but you know he must be red-faced, displeased—aware that he’s been humiliated. Beaten by a Stoneheart, concubine stolen by Sigonian, one of his favourite possessions claimed by a former slave. You'd laugh if you could.

You can't help but kiss Aventurine while the two of you wait for the elevator, a smile glowing into his lips.

It's absurd, but a staff member approaches the two of you as you indulge in one another. Aventurine pulls away as you’re approached, looking mildly annoyed as he switches on his synesthesia beacon.

“Sir,” the staff says, “you’ve left your other winnings at the table.”

Even in his post-orgasm bliss, Aventurine responds promptly. “I’ll cash it all,” he says. “Send the money to my room. I'm not coming back tomorrow.”

“Very well. And the terms of the… human resource exchange that just happened?”

Aventurine’s jaw clicks. It's quiet, but surprising. You watch him carefully.

“We didn't bet contracts,” he says. “This is a concubine, not a slave. But tell Mister Li I'll buy them anyway. I'll pay whatever price he wants, which I’d wager is the company that he gambled and lost to me. Maybe suggest that to him.”

“Of course,” the staff member replies, bowing. Despite the first-rate service, Aventurine looks like he can't get out of there sooner enough as he guides you into the elevator. You give him a curious look as the door closes.

“You're going to give up a multiplanetary corporation just for this?” you ask.

“Not entirely. The IPC was planning to acquire it anyway. It'll be ours again in a few months.” He stares at your reflections in the mirror, his strange eyes lingering on your dishevelled form. “We’ll put your intel to good use,” he adds, and although Jade or Diamond or any of your real bosses would say this with a smile and reward you with a bonus, Aventurine’s expression is unreadable.

“What's on your mind?” you ask, fingers brushing against his hand. “You’re worried about something.”

Aventurine blinks, and it takes him a moment to recover.

“Nothing. Just hoping we didn't give our relationship away just now.” He cups your face with a hand, guides you into looking at his smile. A deflection. “I might have gotten carried away.”

You lean into his touch, eyes playful: a performance. As if he's some stranger that you're servicing, a captor being entertained; as if you're a plaything about to be used. As if you expect to be treated like the disposable commodity that your husband just gambled away.

“I wouldn't worry,” you reassure him. “I'm sure after the show we put on, it'll be clear to anyone that you're only keeping me around for sex.”

It's very, very subtle, but a muscle in Aventurine's neck twitches. He'd never allow it in a game of cards, never before the IPC, never before the prying eyes of slavers and killers—but he allows it in front of you. He always unwittingly bares himself to you, even as he swallows his discomfort before adopting his usual, vulpine expression. You don't think anyone else would notice what lies beneath the gilded surface of his smile, his liar’s eyes. You don't think anyone else would notice his tells, his vulnerabilities, his quiet fear of loss.

After all, there is no one else in this universe who knows how to trick him into intimacy.

Winning has always come with a certain emptiness for Aventurine. Gambling is, after all, a zero sum game. He plays a royal flush and people lose their homes. Winner takes all. He survives the fighting pits, his blade dripping red with the lives of other slaves. Winner takes all. He runs from the stench of blood and burning flesh, praying for thunder and rain loud enough to drown the screams of his dying kin. Winner takes all.

He alone survives. He alone enjoys his riches. Ever since the Avgin died, he has always been by himself. There is no amount of coin nor credit that will ever change this.

Here is another unyielding fact that hollows any win: that no matter how many credits he collects, he will always be a chip himself. He will always be a plastic token worth sixty coppers. Gambling is a zero-sum game, and ever since the day he was chained, Aventurine has been the pool of riches divided among winners. He has always been the commodity being traded between hands. He has always been the prize to be cashed out and used. Even now, with all this money and power, it will never be him who comes to collect: it will always be the IPC. Winner takes all.

Such is his fate. Luck is always on his side, but he has always had the losing hand against destiny. No matter how many times he wins, there is nothing that will ever truly belong to him.

But then he met you.

Then he met you, and now his luck does not always feel like such a cruel or empty thing. Now the zero-sum game has meaning. He hedges his bets in the market and buys out a planet, and acquires you along with the shares. Winner takes all. He gambles his life against a nuclear power and comes out on top, and the IPC allows him to keep you by his side. Winner takes all. He plays a royal flush and wins at a table of slave traders, and he gets to fuck you until you can't think of any cock but his own. Winner takes all.

Gambling is a zero-sum game, and when you're the reward, Aventurine wouldn't have it any other way. He’ll never share you with anyone. He'll never sell you to anyone.

He’ll never lose you to anyone.

Sometimes it surprises him, this attachment he feels to you. He doesn't quite understand it, but he thinks it mostly just has to do with how good it feels to fuck you. Much like gambling, Aventurine has never enjoyed sex until you came along. Sex for him has always felt like a humiliation, like being gutted open as a captive animal, like being won and passed around in the grand hall of some gaudy casino.

Which is, in fact, another thing he never thought he'd enjoy: having sex in the Venetian Zhijin before an audience of revolting men. He'd resented having to do it as a slave, but he’d enjoyed doing it with you as a Stoneheart. He'd even do it again if he could—take you over and over again on that card table, fill you up with his cum. Spread your cunt in front of everyone, so they could see for themselves that you were now his. Winner takes all.

Winning doesn't feel empty when you're his reward. Sex doesn't either. Because Aventurine isn't a chip or an animal or a commodity when he fucks you—he's a player. Someone with a seat at the table, as just as wealthy and powerful as the slave traders around him. Someone who’s allowed to own something—really own something.

Really allowed to own you.

Aventurine owns you. When he fucks you, he is a player at the table, and you are the prize he gets to keep. And no matter how you feel about him and how you act toward him—this is all the two of you will ever be. He knows this. He knows that you know it too.

So sometimes he can't fathom it, the way he treats you in bed. The way he always kisses your commodity code when he sees it, the way he allows you to kiss his own. The way he always thinks about pleasuring you until you're drunk on his cock, so addicted to him that you’ll never want to be touched by anyone else. The way he always likes how your body feels when it's being shaped by his hands. How different it feels from being forced to touch other people.

How badly you make him want something that he's always hated.

And this is what he understands least of all: how he doesn't like to hear you say aloud the true nature of your relationship. How he doesn't like it when you accept this reality and say, you're only keeping me around for sex.

It hollows him out when he hears it. A bitter feeling swells in his throat, and he forces himself to swallow.

Aventurine keeps his face neutral as he enters the suite with you. As soon as the door is shut, you pull him close—close enough for him to see the blurred lines of your lipstick, smudged from his mouth; close enough to see the white diamond necklace on your neck, a collar for a concubine; close enough to see the finger-shaped discolorations on your throat, poorly hidden by your foundation.

Close enough to see all the things done to your body by others—all the things you didn't choose for yourself.

“How do you want to have me next?” Your fingertip traces his lips. “On the bed? In the shower?” Your eyes are playful. “Maybe against the window?”

Aventurine’s hand cups your cheek, gold rings pressed against your skin. His hold is delicate, more careful than with anything else he's ever handled—any of his watches, his furs, his jewellery. Even more than with the aventurine stone.

“I want to kiss you,” he says.

You blink.

“Kiss me?” Your brow ticks up, but then your face lights up in supposed understanding. “Okay. You can kiss me. And then?”

“And then I'll keep kissing you.”

You tilt your head, not understanding. “Really?”

“What? Is that off-limits now?” He leans in, expression playful. “Don't tell me I've got to go back downstairs and win back permission to kiss you from your husband.”

Before you can say anything else—ask anything else, perceive anything else—he presses his mouth to yours. Your eyes widen for only a moment before falling shut, your arms wrapping around his neck. Your lips part for him, and he delights in the noise you make as he deepens the kiss.

He did lie, in a way. The two of you do end up fucking again—this time in bed, your mouth gasping into his as you fall apart for him, wet and needy around his cock. You're so warm around him, so pliable beneath him, so desperate when possessed by him. He knows that he could keep going, that he could do anything to you, that you'd be eager to let him use you however he wants.

But all he does afterward is kiss you.

This is yet another act that he never thought he'd enjoy. Kissing has always felt like a chore or a power play or a manipulation. It has always come with a certain emptiness—just like gambling, just like sex. And then he met you, and now it no longer feels so hollow. Because when he wins bets for the IPC, he feels like a poker chip in one of their games, but when he’s fucking you, he feels like a player at the table. And sometimes, when he kisses you—when he holds you close, when you come down from your high and press your face into the crook of his neck and in the vulnerable haze of your bliss, tell him, I missed you—

—he finally feels like a human being.

end notes: christ alive I have never written anything so horny glddjsksjs. I apologize for both my mid smut writing and deranged characterization 💔

initially this was supposed to be brainless pwp about aventurine eating you out on a poker table but I kept asking myself “why the hell did aventurine gamble for human beings and why are these two insane enough to be fucking in a casino tho lol”, and thus a coherent narrative was born from my shameless lust for this guy! but please also don't take the story too seriously because this is a dumb smut piece first and foremost and I mostly wrote it with my clit 😔✌️

that being said, if you are curious about the subject matter that I covered – here's an afterword expanding on my intentions with the themes.

#aventurine x reader #aventurine smut #hsr smut #hsr x reader #honkai star rail x reader #x reader #im so tired of editing this the quality of this piece is a lost cause sldkfjsldkfj #DIVIDER BY @/CAFEKITSUNE BTW it is so cute i thought it was perfect for this fic #anyway. sorry to everyone for character assassinating our favourite gambler #yueshuo.fics #dead dove #cw.slavery

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signipotens · 1 year ago

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For anyone wondering what this has to do with the 14th Amendment, most famously known for its Equal Protection and Due Process clauses, the relevant part of section 4 of the amendment reads:

The validity of the public debt of the United States, authorized by law, […] shall not be questioned.

It’s never been tried in court before because the debt ceiling has always been raised before it’s become a litigable issue* (even during the big controversies after the GFC), but it is widely regarded by legal experts that the plain text and original intent of the amendment would render the debt ceiling (at least in part) unconstitutional.

* In the United States, the Supreme Court isn’t allowed to issue rulings sua sponte (on its own initiative) and strike down whatever laws it wants whenever it wants, it has to wait for someone who has been injured by a law to file a lawsuit against the government.

There are some extraordinary measures that the Treasury Department can take on its own to get more money to tide things over, but at the scale that the US Federal Government works, the money from those runs out pretty quickly. Many of these measures have already been taken, and it’s that money that will run out here in the next couple weeks.

What may happen if this continues is that Biden will issue an executive order to the Treasury Department telling them to ignore the debt ceiling, using the various powers granted to the president by the Constitution to ensure that the government runs smoothly and meets its debts and obligations. Then someone will try to sue, and then the Courts will review the constitutionality of the debt ceiling.

If you or anyone you care about is relying on:

Food stamps/SNAP/EBT

SSI/SSDI/social security

a tax refund not yet received as of May 2023

a government employee salary

Medicaid

Medicare

Pell grants that have not yet been disbursed

Or anything else paid out by the US federal government—

You need to be aware of what's happening with the debt ceiling!

Because any or all of the items listed above might not be funded right away in June 2023.

The US government is increasingly looking like it will run out of money on or around June 1st, and no one has yet made the rules about which bills WILL get paid when that happens.

The usual way the gov stops this from happening is being blocked by Republicans who insist they won't let the problem be fixed until programs keeping people alive are cut. (They won't cut corporate subsidies though.)

You and people you care about could be impacted by this.

Please save back any money you can, fill your prescriptions now, and look up news about the debt ceiling.

#i speak #if republicans want to keep the debt ceiling as a negotiating tactic #it’s in their best interest to raise it at the last possible moment #to force the government to take crisis measures #but not force it into enough of a crisis that the law can actually be challenged #the government is here to help #this is an anti cleveland blog

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lyvhie · 3 months ago

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— perv!dreamies headcanons

nct dream x fem!reader (18+ mdni) a/n: guys is that a hc or a scenario helppp. anywaysss, that's for all of you cuties who filled my asks with perv!dreamies requests after i reblogged a haechan's post about that BUT I'M JUST A READER I'M NOT GOOD AT WRITING THIS THING SO SO SO SO PLEASE BE KIND THAT ONE WAS HAAARDDD!!! and sorry for the recent inactivity, i'm kinda having a life crisis again haha... 😓 cw: perv behavior ofc, voyeurism, masturbation, coercion (chenle), kinda somnophilia i guess (renjun), panty stealing (& lmk if i forgot some!)

for many reasons, you were CHENLE's favorite maid. you were an exemplary employee. not only were you punctual, attentive, and skilled in your work, but you also showed a level of obedience that was unmatched by the other maids.

he took notice of it almost immediately. whatever he said or asked, you would always respond like a perfectly trained dog. no matter how trivial or senseless the task, you would always comply without question. you never showed any signs of frustration or hesitation, even when he was intentionally demanding or unreasonable. it was almost uncanny how you would immediately drop whatever you were doing in order to fulfill his every command, no matter how demeaning or time-consuming.

chenle soon discovered the reason behind your obedience. it was a simple explanation – you desperately needed that job. your family's mounting debts hung over your head, leaving you with no choice but to cling fiercely to your only source of money. then, he decided to push your limits just for his own entertainment. he would order you to stand in the corner facing the wall for an hour without moving, rearrange his library alphabetically, dust the ceiling, even though there's no visible dirt or dust.

indeed, you never resisted or questioned any of his demands; you were the epitome of obedience. he ceased his mean streak and shifted his focus to a far more interesting activity: your uniform. he imagined you wearing a much sexier gown, the skirt barely reaching mid-thigh, complemented by a deep neckline that would reveal more of your cleavage.

and chenle was completely right. he loved the sight of you climbing steps with a duster in hand, cleaning a spot that was conveniently out of reach. with your new, skimpier attire, it allowed him a perfect view of your panties. every time you bent over, he couldn't resist sneaking a glimpse of your chest or your ass.

however, that entertainment eventually lost its luster; he craved more than just watching you. it was then that he gently pressed your back against the wall and ground his body against yours, the bulge on his pants rubbing your thighs, peppering kisses along your neck.

you weren't particularly welcoming (that thing of playing hard to get), but he presented you with a choice: you could be a good girl and let him have his fun, and in return, he would even give you a raise; or he could fire you without hesitation.

needless to say what you chose.

your close friend, JAEMIN, who happened to be a talented photographer, had always held you in high regard. since the beginning, he had "admired and respected your unique presence", as he said, seeing you as his primary source of inspiration and even his muse. whenever he approached you with the request to be his model for his photography sessions, he didn't have to work hard to convince you, knowing well that your nature as a people pleaser made it near impossible for you to say no.

initially, the photography sessions appeared normal. you felt a bit out of place, uncertain about what to do with your body and how to pose naturally. you were somewhat stiff, unsure of how to act. jaemin, however, noticed your discomfort and stepped in to help. he reassured you to relax and simply be yourself, advising you not to overthink. from time to time, he gently guided you into various poses, giving constructive feedback to help you loosen up. and it worked, you found yourself getting more relaxed and even feeling proud of yourself as he showered you with compliments.

once jaemin noticed you were becoming more at ease in front of the camera, a mischievous twinkle appeared in his eyes. over time, the clothing options for your photoshoots grew increasingly provocative and sensual.

low-cut dresses and revealing shirts highlighted your cleavage, while miniskirts and tiny shorts barely concealed your underwear. the transition from fully clothed to almost baring it all happened so gradually and naturally that you scarcely noticed. the entire process was efficient and seamless, and by the time you realized it, you were left in your lingerie — that he picked personally —, not having fully grasped the incremental removal of your clothes.

jaemin couldn't believe his luck during each shoot. the images he captured of you had inadvertently become fodder for his… private pleasure. the provocative poses he carefully orchestrated provided him with a treasure trove of material to fuel his fantasies. whether it was admiring your form or imagining scenarios involving you, the photos served his purpose well.

he found himself losing count of the numerous times he'd jerked off to images of you, his restraint wearing thin. the proximity and yet the distance from you that he endured at each shoot became increasingly unbearable. the need to feel your touch, to physically be with you, had reached a breaking point. his thoughts filled with the sweet sounds he longed to draw from your lips, and he realized the urgent necessity to move beyond mere pictures and experience the real thing.

then, the shoots took a drastic turn once the sessions started to delve into a more… intimate territory. now, you posed fully exposed, completely naked, bared before the camera like a blank canvas. you couldn't quite understand how he had managed to persuade you to willingly embrace nudity, considering it was something you'd never thought you could do in your life. however, his prowess with words coupled with your own tendency to give in to them had ultimately led you down this path.

as always, jaemin relished these moments of freedom to touch you, his deft hands roaming over your body with the pretext of adjusting your poses. you, in your shyness, acquiesced to his actions without complaint, allowing him to do as he pleased under the guise of artistic direction.

he would tenderly stroke your thighs, gently spreading them apart, his teeth sinking into his bottom lip as his eyes feasted on the sight before him, his fingertips brushing against your cunt ever so slightly, eliciting a surprised gasp from your mouth. he would say some bullshit about creating the right atmosphere, a means to help you fully immerse yourself in the art or whatever, while his actions spoke louder than his words.

you didn't even know exactly what to do or think when, suddenly, his warm tongue dove into your pussy. you instinctively attempted to close your legs, only to be held in place by jaemin's sturdy arms, which firmly kept you motionless. he eagerly and desperately lavied your sensitive flesh with his mouth, making you feel like his favorite meal that he couldn't get enough of, as if he had spent days starving and you were the first thing he could lay his hands on.

you were unaware of it, but jaemin had started recording the session since the very beginning. he seemed less interested in still photos, as he carefully recorded every moment — the soft gasps and subtle moans that escaped your lips, the expression of pleasure and wonder that crossed your face. he knew he would have plenty more material to enjoy in the days to come, once this session was done and, if he was even more lucky, you would become his favorite particular porn star.

you know, JISUNG is not intentionally like that, it's just that he becomes uncontrollable when he's around you. you're his first girlfriend, and often, he wonders how he got so lucky to land a hottie like you, because you're the girl he's always dreamed of having.

being his first relationship, he's still learning how to navigate things and isn't quite sure how to express his desires. since it's still early in the relationship, he hesitates to speak up about his wants and doesn't think the time is right yet. as a result, his mind often drifts to imagining... certain scenarios, even during the most innocent of interactions with you.

are you eating ice cream? he can't help but imagine how cute you would look with your soft lips wrapped around his cock as he fucks your throat and watches your eyes fill up with tears. tying your hair to do household chores? you would look so good with his fingers tangled in your locks as he pounded you from behind against the kitchen counter, pressing your face on the cool surface as he listen to your moans. do you need a shoulder massage? he can't help but notice how his large hand can easily encircle your neck, thinking about how this is such a perfect spot to hold onto when he's inside you and how good it will feel.

sigh… at the end of the day, the only thing he ends up fucking is his own fist. and that's exactly what he was doing now, but this time it was different, because you were right there beside him, peacefully sleeping in his bed, making it the first time you stayed over. he was happy because he could finally cuddle and hold you throughout the whole night.

but there was also a problem because he could finally cuddle and hold you throughout the whole night. as soon he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you closer, his hormones were already stirring. the moment you snuggled against him, he could feel his boxers getting too tight for comfort, your ass pressing against his growing bulge in a way that was just too good.

he was both grateful and a bit frustrated that you were already asleep. he wondered what would happen if you were to notice his struggles, but he was the only one who could find relief at the moment. that's what led him to the situation he was in now, secretly-not-so-secretly touching himself right next to you while admiring your tiny, thin pajamas that served as such a nice visual material for him.

the clothes in question was a pair of thin, soft fabric shorts combined with a spaghetti strap top. the shorts were short and snug, leaving very little to the imagination. the thin material seemed almost translucent in certain lights, barely concealing what was underneath. the spaghetti strap top revealed just the right amount of shoulder and cleavage, adding to the overall alluring effect.

he wanted to touch you so bad, to taste you, to feel you around him. he would give anything to fill you up with his cum, stuff you until it was leaking out of your tight pussy, just for him to push it inside you again and make you take everything he has to give you. he arched back, head thrown back in ecstasy, his hips bucking upward as he climaxed and, before he could think properly, he was already shooting ropes of cum all over your sleeping face.

he knew he just did something weird and wrong, and he felt guilty, but… you looked incredibly hot and cute all at once like that. he almost became hard again, but then you started to stir, and he immediately froze. if you woke up right now, how on earth would he explain what he had just done?

he was on the verge of panicking when he noticed you had stopped stirring, still sleeping peacefully. he let out a sigh of relief, but then he quickly remembered a new problem: how exactly was he supposed to clean you up now?

HAECHAN was glad and thankful that god made you dumb, otherwise he would never get the chance to spend so much time with you and be alone in your room so many times, studying together for your exams.

when you approached him for assistance in raising your grades, haechan thought he was dreaming. he pinched himself to make sure it was real, and without thinking twice he accepted your request.

haechan never thought he'd ever be in a girl's house, let alone your room. it was such a pleasant surprise to be there, surrounded by you. every time he was in your room, it almost felt like a paradise to him.

he loved being near you, so close that your scent would fill his nostrils. your shampoo, your perfume, and the strawberry flavored lip gloss on your lips… it was too much for him to bear. he couldn’t keep his gaze away from your cleavage, imagining what it would feel like to bury his face in your chest. or to be between your thighs, he didn't even need to eat you out (though it would be awesome too), just sniffing your sex scent would be enough... damn, he was hard again.

haechan almost missed your words, as you mentioned it was getting late and you had to go home, since you decided to study at haechan's place that day. despite his disappointment that you had to leave so soon, he was also glad, as now he could finally relieve the tightness in his pants.

he quickly opened his closet and grabbed a pair of your panties, the most recent one he had obtained. ever since the study sessions had begun, he made a habit of taking a pair of your panties from either your drawer or laundry basket whenever you left him alone in your room.

haechan wasted no time in pulling down his pants and releasing his throbbing cock, leaking with pre-cum. he rubbed the fluid all over his length as he brought the underwear to his face, pressing it against his nose and breathing deeply, inhaling your delicious scent. a soft moan escaping his lips as his hand began moving in a steady pace, while he slowly and intently breathed in your essence.

his hand moved with an ever-increasing speed, his mind filled with thoughts about you. he was so lost in the moment that he didn't even notice when you suddenly appeared in the doorway of his room, stunned by the view. you didn't mean to catch him like that, you had returned to pick up your keys, which you had left in the living room. however, you heard haechan calling (moaning) out to you from his room and...

he was caught completely off guard when you called his name, and his eyes widened in shock when he realized you were there. as much as he was startled and embarrassed, he couldn’t bring himself to stop. instead, his motions became even more urgent, the expression of slight disgust on your face was an unexpected turn-on to him. being watched like this made him peak faster than usual, bringing your panties to his cock, finishing on it as he always do, coating the cloth with his cum.

well, he can't even tell you that this isn't what it looks like.

as your best friend, RENJUN, always had your best interests at heart. you grew up with very strict parents who controlled your life and limited your experiences, leaving you as a naive adult. you only achieved your freedom when you moved out and shared an apartment with your dear friend, who was the first person to encourage you to leave and offered you unconditional support. he promised to stay by your side no matter what, and the two of you intended to stick together until you could afford separate places of your own.

he wasn't lying about being a safety net for you, just as he always had. he did want to protect you from your crazy parents, but that wasn't the only reason he wanted you to move in with him. now it was just you and him. all alone. the situation seemed like a dream come true for him, and he found himself clinging to you more than ever, enjoying the increased amount of time you spent together.

renjun had always been a touchy person, particularly with you. however, since you started to live together, it seems his touches have increased tenfold, taking advantage of your innocent view.

he seemed way more comfortable touching different parts of your body, always finding some excuse that you believed, as you trusted him and couldn't see any ill intent in his behavior. his hands would caress your belly, occasionally making their way to your ass, and if he felt bold, he even groped your breasts. despite his increasingly intimate touches, you dismissed his behavior as friendly affection. it wasn't that you didn't recognize the sexual undertones in his actions, but rather that you chose not to see them that way with him. you trusted him implicitly, blinding yourself to the true nature of his behavior.

he also developed a habit of sneaking peeks at you showering or changing, making it a regular occurrence. he even went as far as entering your room while you were asleep, getting off beside you and cleaning himself with one of your panties, then he would place the cloth back on your drawer, all so he could see you wearing them when he peeked under your dress the next day, smiling proudly at the thought that you didn’t even know his cum was all over it.

it's not like he really needs to fuck you, although he would love to, but just being close to you, holding you, touching you was enough. for example, when you're cuddling while watching a movie and you fall asleep, he always uses that opportunity to slide his dick between your thighs and fuck them, carefully in not moaning too loudly to not bother your sleep. it's always a nice experience and more than he could ever ask for, but he was sure that soon you would let him bury himself deep inside your pussy, he would make it happen no matter what

MARK's gaze was fixated on the window, shifting between your house and the nearby wall clock. it was a familiar routine now — every night at 8 pm, he waited expectantly, counting down the minutes until the moment you would cross the door to your room.

mark couldn't tell if you were truly unaware of his presence or if you were intentionally putting on a show, but he had to admit that he loved it. since you moved in, this had become an habit that he couldn't break not even if he wanted to. as soon as you turned on the lights, mark's pupils widened with excitement. "finally," he thought, scooting closer to the window and settling into his cushion, his eyes locked onto your every move.

you began the familiar routine by tossing your purse onto your bed, then you took a moment to stretch and untie your hair. but this was just foreplay to the main event — mark's favorite part had begun. it was the moment when the true magic happened. he sat back, ready to take in the spectacle that was unfolding before his eyes.

as your hands lifted the hem of your shirt, a tantalizing reveal of your skin unfurled. mark could already feel his cock stirring inside his pants, his panting breaths becoming more pronounced. he observed the weariness on your face and noticed your deliberate pace. perhaps it was fatigue that slowed your movements, but he didn't mind. it gave him time to appreciate you even more.

he leaned in closer, his eyes devouring every inch of your body as you slowly removed your clothes. each moment was a delicious tease, building up the sensation within him. as soon as his eyes fell upon you in your lingerie, his pupils widened in surprise and desire. the garment was a new addition to your collection — and it was in his favorite color. he couldn't help but wonder if you had purchased it with him specifically in mind. the sight of you in that delicate lace and fabric heightened his arousal, making him ache with want.

his movements were automatic when he pulled down his pants and underwear just enough to free his aching cock, wrapping his hand around it. mark stroke his dick, his gaze remained fixated on you, refusing to move even an inch as he watched you undo the clasp of your bra. his lower lip caught between his teeth when he saw your perfect boobs jiggling softly as you moved around.

his eyes taking in the sight of your upper body, traveling down as you move your hands to reach the waistband of your panties, bending over to pull them down, giving him the chance to look at your ass and how your pretty pussy was being crushed between your thighs. he let out a low hiss through clenched teeth, his hand finding a steady rhythm as his breaths quickened, a soft moan of pleasure escaped his lips. his gaze fixed on you, his brow furrowing in desire. you were so beautiful, so gorgeous, so hot, so, so…. so everything!

it wasn't a want anymore, it was need. he needed you. he needed you so bad. he didn't even know your name, but he knew you were the one who could fulfill his desires.

he let out a disheartened whimper as you reached for your robe, the fabric concealing your lovely form and plunging the room into darkness, robbing him of the sight he yearned to behold. that was his least favorite part. he hated resorting to using his imagination, but in the absence of the real thing, he had no choice.

closing his eyes, he continued his movements, imagining how it would feel to kiss your lips, to make out with you until you gasped for breath. he thought about trailing his mouth down your body, giving your beautiful breasts the attention they so rightly deserve. he would love to have you squirming under him. he would get on his knees, wrap those gorgeous legs of yours around him and feast on you until you were shaking and screming out for more. he just knew you taste good.

he imagined how your voice would sound like when he slide deep inside you, feeling your heat envelop him like a glove. he started to buck his hips up, thrusting into his hand harder, his moans filling his room. he imagined how would it feel to have you clenching around him, how you would cry so prettily when he played with your sensitive bud until you cream his whole lenght. mark felt the familiar tightening of his balls, his entire body tensing until he finally came, smearing the white fluid all over his hand, his mouth open in a silent gasp. panting, he fell back onto the bed, his eyes still closed as he thought about how he couldn't wait for the next night.

after suffering an injury during practice, JENO found himself confined to a hospital bed for a few days of observation. at first, the prospect of spending time in a hospital seemed like the epitome of boredom and jeno was convinced it was the worst thing that could happen to him at the moment. however, that all changed when he met you, his sexy nurse.

suddenly, the hospital stay didn't seem so bad after all.

jeno found himself unable to keep his eyes off you, who frequently attended to him. he noticed the the gentle sway of you hips as you walked, and his eyes couldn't help but roam up and down your form when you bent over to adjust his pillows. whenever you spoke, his mind wandered to thoughts of how your lips would feel against his own.

you were consistently and diligently attentive to his needs, always arriving promptly whenever he rang for assistance. sometimes, he even displayed childish behavior when other nurses came to attend to him, insisting that only you were capable of addressing his concerns.

it didn't escape his notice that you were a relatively new nurse, experiencing your first time on the job. this realization sparked a sly plan in his mind, as he knew you might find it challenging to turn down his requests. he was fully aware of your inexperience, making him eager to push his limits and see how far he could go while you navigated your new role. he was determined to take advantage of the power dynamic, using your hesitation to explore the boundaries of what he could ask for and get away with.

for example, he would often ask for full body massages from you, and the sensation of your delicate hands roaming all over his body would drive him absolutely wild. with unabashed confidence, he'd make sure to vocalize just how much he loved the feel of your touch, complimenting you on your skillful hands and openly expressing his desire to return the favor.

one time, he pretended that his condition was more severe than it truly was, just so that he could have you attend to him during bath time. he, once again, relished the feeling of your hands gently cleaning him from head to toe, watching your shy expression while you attempted to maintain casual conversation, your focus interrupted by the sounds of pleasure that escaped his lips uncontrollably.

one time, after pretending his condition was more severe than it truly was, he got the chance to feel the heavenly sensation of having you run your hands over his body while you washed him. it was a brief but unforgettable experience as he savored every moment of your touch. he was so hard that it was painful. he loved how your shy expression couldn't quite hide your feelings while you tried to keep a casual conversation going, yout words faltering every time a sound of pleasure escaped his lips.

he would never forget the way you looked at him with surprise, shyness, and a hint of embarrassment when he came on your hand with just a few of your innocent touches. your eyes widened slightly and a shy, awkward, subtle smile formed on your lips as you look away briefly, trying to hide your reaction.

it was almost humorous how swiftly you completed the task of bathing him after that incident, as if you were eager to finish the job and move on quickly. in the days that followed, you seemed to make a conscious effort to minimize the time you spent in his room, probably to avoid any awkward or potentially embarrassing encounters.

he couldn't help but notice your attempts to distance yourself after the incident, but he had a plan in mind to fix this: he decided that you simply needed to get used to his requests, just as you had gotten used to fulfilling the other needs he'd asked for. what's more, he was determined to have some form of sexual contact with you before he left the hospital, and he was set on making it happen.

it was indeed a perfect opportunity. he called for you late in the night, knowing you were on the night shift and there would be no disruptions. he wasted no time in making his request clear: he needed you to get him off. he almost couldn't contain his amusement at the look of wide-eyed surprise on your face, quickly dismissing your denials with a simple explanation. he told you how he didn't have the strength to do it himself, how his weakened condition made it difficult for him to take care of himself in that way, how ill he felt, and how he needed release as a man, and that it was your duty as his nurse to help him.

his heart nearly skipped a beat and he felt something like fireworks going off inside his chest when he saw you bite your lower lip and give a small nod of agreement. once again, the hospital stay didn't seem so bad after all.

#chenle smut #mark smut #jeno smut #jisung smut #haechan smut #jaemin smut #nct dream smut #nct smut #nct headcanon #nct x reader #mark x reader #chenle x reader #jisung x reader #jeno x reader #haechan x reader #renjun x reader #jaemin x reader

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kamiversee · 8 months ago

Text

➶-͙˚ ༘✶ 𝙏𝙃𝙀 𝙁*𝘾𝙆 𝙇𝙄𝙎𝙏

✧.* CHAPTER 45 || The Chilling Confession

[ { SYPNOSIS } ] ➤ A tale in which Gojo Satoru blackmails you into seducing a list of people to clear his debt. Sounds easy enough, right?

[ { CHAPTER CONTENT } ] ➤ language, fluff, dark themes, & semi-angst?

[ { WORD COUNT } ] ➤ 6.5k

[ { PAIRINGS } ] ➤ jjk men x f!reader. gojo x f!reader. geto x f!reader. toji x f!reader. choso x f!reader. sukuna x f!reader. nanami x f!reader.

[ [ chapters mlist } ]

——YOU DRIFTED OFF to sleep trying to figure out what it is you wanted to do. Maybe you’ll just figure it out as you go from this point on.

After all, it seems as though it’s time for your final arc to take place.

By that, it’s meant that it’s time for you to tell Gojo you’ve completed the list, have him pay you one last time, and then, per his promise, use his help (if needed) to get with Choso.

There’s been so many highs and lows since this entire thing started. So many memories lay locked within your clouded mind. Between the love, passion, anger, and confusion, you think it would be best to allow the rest to flow naturally.

Will you question Gojo? Maybe, maybe not. You haven’t decided yet. Either way, he’s already told you that he had no plans on revealing the truth to you until years later so, there really is no point in asking him anything, is there?

Sure, you’ll remain confused but, confusion may be better than frustration. At least, for right now.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆ .　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

The warmth of the morning sun is what woke you up. Bright rays shined upon your face, making your eyes scrunch together just as they fluttered open.

The side of your face was pressed against a chest-- Nanami’s firm chest. Just as you woke up and angled your head up to his face, you noticed he was already awake, his eyes peering up at the ceiling. The blond seemed to deep in thought before you looked at him, your movement causing him to turn his attention to you.

A small smile was drawn across your lips, “Morning’.” You humed.

Nanami nods, “Good morning.” He replies, his voice deeper than the night prior due to the grogginess of slumber.

This sudden feeling of peace wrapped around you like a blanket as you thought to yourself for just a moment; you could get used to waking up like this.

“Sleep well?” Nanami asked.

His arm was around your waist and you didn’t bother trying to reposition yourself from laying halfway on top of him. “Yeah, you?” Your voice was just as soft as his and you wondered how the morning would play out.

He nodded again, “Slept’ fine.” Nanami says simply, “It’s nice feeling someone snuggling up against me in the middle of the night. It helped me rest.”

You chuckle, “Sorry if I was clingy in my sleep.” As you say that, you start moving to sit up.

The man shrugs, “I enjoyed it.”

One of your hands was against his chest as you sat up comfortably and Nanami’s grasp slid down to rest on your hip. You turned away from him for a moment, taking in the pleasant sight of his well-kept bedroom as the sunlight cascaded over the area.

Bright colors of the furniture made the light reflect and gave the entire room this beautiful golden hue. Truthfully, you could wake up here every day happily.

Nanami suddenly sighs, “Y’know… I’ve uh, I’ve never done this before.”

You blink and then turn your head to him, “This?”

“A one-night stand,” He clarifies.

Well, at least he knows this was a one-time thing…

You chuckle, “Typically, I’d be gone before you woke up.”

He hums, “Is that so?”

“Yeah,” You shrug, “There’s less attachment when you just up and leave.”

Nanami nods, “Less attachments,” He echoes, almost as if he were noting this down in his head. “Yeah, that’s where I’m having difficulty.”

You raise a brow, “One night with me and you’re already attached?”

He chuckles, “Not exactly. I’m just not used to having sex and then parting from someone completely.”

“I see,” You murmur, “Well,” Your gaze grows somber all of a sudden as you trail the tip of your fingers up along his chest, “You’ll forget about me sooner or later.”

Nanami scoffs, “I won’t.”

You meet his eyes, “And why not?”

“I told you,” His other hand goes to yours and he rests his palm on top of where you’d been tracing his skin, “You’re my first one-night stand.”

You tilt your head, “Give it a few years maybe? You’ll forget all about this.”

Nanami’s eyes are full of seriousness, “I may not be attached but it’ll be pretty hard to forget the woman who used her career to get into my pants…”

Your eyes widen for a second, and then, you burst out laughing, “That’s my flirting tactic, sorry.”

Nanami smiles, “I’ve realized. Speaking of which,” He moves and sits up, “Did the sex give you the information you needed?”

You blink, “Uh…”

“I was supposed to show you how stressed I am,” Nanami recalls, smirking a bit, “Did I do that effectively?”

You flash a smile, “Yeah, you did that perfectly. This’ll totally help me get that job.”

He chuckles, “What is the job you’re looking to get again? You said it was something at our school?”

“Oh, it’s just an internship.” You say with a shrug.

“Right,” He nods, “Is this internship what you plan on doing forever or…?”

You laugh a bit. Something about this morning's conversation is making you oddly happier than expected, perhaps it was because you enjoyed discussing your future with someone, “No, of course not. It’s just all I can obtain right now,” You explain.

Nanami raises a brow, “So what’s your career goal?”

“Hmmm… Anything in therapy, I believe.” You explain simply.

He nods, “I could see you in that.”

His words make you smile all too hard, “Really?”

“Yes, of course,” Nanami replies quickly.

You giggle, “I’m glad someone can see me working in my dream field.”

“Mhm,” He hums, nodding a little, “Could’ see you as a sex therapist too.”

Your eyes widen, “A sex therapist? Me?”

“Yes you,” Nanami claims, a gentle scoff slipping past his lips, “I’m sure you’ve had enough experience to help others.”

“Did you just call me a whore again?” You ask, your tone flat.

He panics all over again, “N-No, I-”

You laugh at him, “I’m joking, relax. But it did seem like that was a fancy way to say I sleep around.”

“Well,” Nanami looks off to the side, raising a curious brow, “Do you?”

You grin, shamelessly accepting the truth of what you’ve done over the past few months, “I mean, my answer really depends on what you consider sleeping around.”

The man chuckles at your words, “I’ll take that as you telling me you don’t sleep around but you are very experienced.”

You shrug, “Yeah, something like that.”

“Right so,” Nanami lets out a yawn, bringing his fist up to his mouth for a moment to cover it. Then, he sighs, “Our whole interaction was, what exactly?”

You raise a brow, “Uh, for research purposes of course.”

He laughs a bit before moving to get out the bed, “Research purposes, she says.”

Your gaze follows him as he stretches his arms up over his head and then heads over to his bathroom, “It was for my study, remember?”

Nanami flicks on the bathroom light and then turns back to you, “For your study…” He repeats, clearly not believing you.

“Yup,” You hum with a smile as he then starts to approach you once more.

The man comes to the side of the bed you’re seated on and offers his hand to you, “So you’re telling me we had sex,” You take his hand and he helps you to get out of the bed and stand to your feet, “For your study?” He finishes.

You angle your head up to him and continue to smile innocently, “Yes sir.”

Nanami freezes for a moment, then he swallows, “First off, don’t call me that. Secondly, so you mean to tell me our entire interaction can be classified as… sex for business?”

He helps to walk you over to the bathroom, your hand held in his the entire time as you carefully take step after step. “I can’t call you sir? If you plan on being a CEO one day, you’ll have to get used to that, y’know…”

“It’s different when a woman like you says it,” Nanami claims. Meanwhile, you two make it to the bathroom and you move to lean against the counter as he goes to grab a spare toothbrush for you, “It hits my ears a bit differently.”

You scoff, “It turns you on, doesn’t it?”

Again, Nanami freezes. This time, he then clears his throat and finds a toothbrush, handing you the item afterward, “I didn’t say that…”

“You also didn’t say no,” You point out. “I mean, what’s gonna’ happen when you meet an attractive woman in business who calls you sir all day long?”

He shakes his head and rolls his eyes at you, “That won’t happen.”

You raise a brow, “Are you saying you don’t think there are attractive women in business?”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying at all. What I’m saying is I know how to keep my composure in a work setting so,” He looks at you, “No woman is going to distract me by using that honorific.”

“And what about outside of the workplace?” You ask, tipping your head to the side.

He gazes at you for a moment and then shrugs, turning away, “That’s a bit different.”

“Uhuh, sure it is,” You say with a scoff as you look at the mirror in front of you, taking in your reflection for a second, “Anyways, what was the second thing you said? Did you say we had sex for business?” You ask with a laugh.

Nanami nods, “Yes, sex for business.”

“That’s an interesting phrase to put to it but, y’know what, it works. Sex for business; an act in which one sleeps with someone with the intent of gaining information or possibly status,” You define in a joking manner.

Your words make the blond laugh as he starts putting toothpaste on his toothbrush, “Wonderful way to describe it.”

“I know right?” You chuckle, moving to follow suit.

The two of you then brush your teeth in comfortable silence, the air peaceful between you both. After which, Nanami offers to make you breakfast but you turn him down, quickly reminding him that this was supposed to operate as a one-night stand and you’ve already overstayed your welcome.

To which he agreed, knowing deep down that even if this was a one-night stand and the two of you were to never cross paths again, he’d never forget his time spent with you. Not only because he enjoyed your company but also because, just as he stated, you were the first woman he’d done this with so, the memory would stick.

That, and he truly did like talking to you. You were different than the women he spoke to in his field of study. A woman of psychology who used that information to seduce him; how was he to ever let that information go?

It was a bittersweet moment to take you home. Nanami couldn’t stop his gaze from lingering on your features for a moment longer than intended and any words you uttered to him stuck in his mind so strongly.

Especially the final short conversation you had with him. By that point, you were in his vehicle and already at your apartment when you had wished Nanami the best. Perhaps it was you reflecting what you wished you had onto him but you truly hoped that he’d find a woman deserving of him.

And if not that, then he’d end up with someone who didn’t have as nearly as much drama in their life as you did.

To which he responded with, “I appreciate that but, if I care about a woman enough, trust me when I say, no amount of drama will keep me from pursuing her.”

You laughed at that, “Yeah? Well, what if she was a whore?”

Nanami stared dead into your eyes and didn’t hesitate to respond to that, “If I care enough, perhaps I’d capitalize off that.”

“Capitalize off of the woman you like being a whore?” You ask curiously.

He shrugs, “That could help in business.”

Your brows knit together, “How so?”

“Women have the ability to climb their way up in corporate situations by sometimes sleeping their way up,” Nanami explains, “So if I found a woman that just so happened to be a whore and I truly cared for her, well…” He shrugs, “I guess what I’m trying to say is; her being a whore wouldn’t matter.”

“Hah.” You hum, “Interesting.”

“Yeah, but,” Nanami shrugs, “The chances of me finding a seductress in business is zero to none.”

“And why is that?” You ask, raising a brow.

He chuckles, “I’ll have risen to the top by the time I find one so, what good would she do me?”

You begin to move to exit the car, “I mean, you never know…”

He blinks, “Never know what?”

“She could threaten your position,” Was the last thing you said regarding that topic to him.

Nanami hadn’t considered that. So, something about that final conversation really stuck with him. Never would he forget the woman that you are.

“I guess we’ll see,” He hums to you.

You nod, “Mhm, maybe I’ll hear about it in the news as some big business-ey scandal,” You say teasingly.

Nanami shakes his head, rolling his eyes at your words, “Yeah right. Go on upstairs now.”

You laugh, “Bye Kento.”

He meets your eyes one last time, “Bye darling.”

With your heart fluttering at the nickname, you finally exit the car and shut the door behind you, giving the man one last wave before heading upstairs to your apartment.

Unlike everyone else on the list, for some reason, Nanami just felt like one of the best interactions. From beginning to end, he gave you peace. Again, somewhere deep down inside you wished for a reality in which you could have prolonged the amount of time spent with him.

But even so, it was time to go back to your current reality-- the one in which you had a decision to make…

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆ .　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

You decided to spend that weekend coming to peace with what it is you were going to do. You could question Gojo about the list but somewhere deep down inside, it was as though you didn’t want to know the truth.

The thought of Gojo being an asshole all along really does bother you. It brings a sting to your heart. Especially since you’d already settled on forgiving him, to undo all you’ve been through with the man by interrogating him all over again just seems like you’re running in a circle, a path of drama with no end.

And that’s the very thing you no longer have the energy to do anymore. With the list complete, you want to experience what you wished you had for the past few months-- freedom.

No more of the blackmail. Finally would you be able to do things on your own without the restrictions of having a man you’d need to seduce.

So, after the weekend, you decided to text Gojo. You told yourself you weren’t going to ask him anything but who knows how that would actually play out? Either way, when you texted Gojo, you told him you had a surprise for him, that surprise being the completion of the list.

Using the excuse of a surprise was the only reason you were able to see him. After all, Gojo was very firm on no contact during your break from him. But of course, when you text him saying you need to see him and there’s a surprise, he agrees to such an event with no hesitation.

Leading to now, a moment that mirrors months ago as you stand at his apartment door, knocking against the wood and awaiting someone to open the door for you. It takes about a minute but the door is soon opened for you and you’re met with the sight of Gojo Satoru.

Fresh out of the shower, shirtless, water dripping and sliding down his body from his wet head of hair, and beautiful love-struck gaze lighting up at the sight of you-- Gojo stands there with a hand on the door, welcoming you in.

He couldn’t even get a greeting out before you entered his apartment and threw your arms around him. Gojo’s breath hitches like always and he could feel his heart skipping a beat in reaction to feeling your warmth against him.

Then, as he hugged you back and kicked the apartment door shut, you shifted your head to meet his eyes, “Hi Satoru,” You greeted.

His entire world, past, present, and future, he found in you within that moment. That sweet voice of yours, uttering his name after so long, such a honeyed tone leaving the beauty that is your lips, along with those eyes of yours that just gazed up at him so naturally.

Gojo found no anger, no regret, and no unhappiness in your eyes for once. Typically, when you looked at him, you always had one of those emotions reflected in your irises but as you stood wrapped in his arms now, you finally looked at peace.

The white-haired man couldn’t help the big gushing smile that spreads across his face, his heart just throbbing in his chest-- holy fuck he was so stupidly in love with you. Just a hug and a call of his name and he was already struggling to breathe or think properly.

Gojo tips his head to the side and you experience butterflies with how much love drips from his words to you, “Hi sweetheart,” He says so very simply, his hands shifting to hold your waist, “Miss me?”

For a moment, you just forget all that he’s done to you. Which is exactly why you couldn’t stand seeing him. Always would his touches, his looks, and his voice make you blind to everything he’s done.

You nod, “A little bit,” The way your voice grazes his ears makes him want to kiss you more than anything. If perfection were a person, in Gojo’s love-blinded mind, it would be you.

“Yeah?” Gojo’s smile widens, “Never’ thought I’d see the day…”

“Me neither but,” You shrug, “You’re the only person who gets on my nerves juust right.”

Your hands slide down from around his neck and you settle them on his arms. His body was moist from his recent shower but you didn’t care, his skin was soft and he smelled so good.

Gojo bit his lower lip for a second, “Am I?”

“That’s not a good thing, Satoru.” You tell him with a scoff.

The feeling of his fingers tracing small circles into your waist as if the motion comforts him was hard to ignore. His touch was so light but you couldn’t help but notice it. “I think that makes me special,” Gojo says with a little shrug.

You roll your eyes, “Yeah, my special pain in the ass.” You huff out.

His eyes won’t leave your face for even a moment as he tilts his head again, “Your special pain in the ass?”

You freeze, having not realized what you said, and steadily drag your gaze back to him, “I just meant like…” For just a second, you lose your words as you make eye contact with him.

Maybe it was because you’d seen Gojo under a negative light for so long but damn were those ocean-blue eyes of his one of the most beautiful sights. You nearly got lost in said sight as you looked at him.

“Like what, love?” Gojo whispered, “I mean, you didn’t say anything wrong. I am your special pain in the ass.”

You chuckle lightly, still dazed by the eye contact, “That’s not true, you’re a pain in the ass to a lot of people.”

He smiles, “That’s not true, people just don’t like me…”

“Maybe because you’re a pain in the ass?” You point out.

“Nah, I think I’m pretty great,” Gojo jokes with a shrug.

“You’re an idiot,” You hum.

His sights dip down to your lips, the urge strong. “I already corrected you on this before, I’m your idiot.”

“That’s so cheesy,” You comment, shaking your head but smiling.

Gojo sighs out your name and you swear your heart just leaps over three beats as he grips onto your waist and pulls your body closer to his.

Batting your eyelashes at him and the sudden seriousness in his gaze, you smile sheepishly, “Hm?”

“I love you so much,” Gojo claims. The words roll off his tongue far too easily and hold way too much affection for you to ever doubt such a thing. Maybe he does love you but, even so, it’s a twisted way of love.

You’re smiling but you never really know how to respond to that, “Do you?”

“I do,” He says quickly, “I swear to you I do.”

Your hands go to his face suddenly and you cup his cheeks in your palm, feeling gentle drops of water flick down onto your skin from his wet hair, “I wish I could believe you,” You whisper to the man.

He frowns a little, “I’m sorry I haven’t expressed it enough-”

“No that’s the thing,” Your voice is so calm and gentle that he just shuts up when you open your mouth, feeling like he’s hanging off the edge of each syllable that leaves your throat, “You express it through words but how can I believe you love me when you don’t express it through actions, Satoru?”

“I…” Gojo trails off. He knows that with him the conversation will always end up going in this direction so, he’s not surprised by you asking such questions.

“Did you blackmail me because you love me?” You murmur, “Or, do you love me because you blackmailed me? Help me understand why your words don’t align with your actions.”

Your sudden question had him at a loss for words. What is he supposed to say to that? How does he explain himself to you without revealing the god-forsaken truth of it all?

Gojo swallows hard, “You know I can’t answer that, sweetheart.”

A soft smile graces your face and you nod, “Of course you can’t…”

“I wish I could,” He whispers.

“Stop wishing, Satoru,” God every time you say his name he swears he stops breathing, “It’s over now so you can tell me.”

The man blinks, “What do you mean it’s over? What’s over?”

“The list,” You whisper, “I finished it.”

Those pretty white eyelashes of his bat in disbelief, “Y-You, what?”

“Friday night, I went to that nightclub, met Nanami, did my thing, and then slept with him,” You explain casually as if you didn’t just drop the fact that you finished the list.

Gojo doesn’t know what to say for a second. He’s just staring at you in disbelief. Then, just when you think he may get upset that you finished the list, the most relieved expression takes over his handsome features. Gojo Satoru appears as though he’s more at peace about it than you.

“You… You did it,” He whispers out in shock, “W-Was this your surprise?”

You nod, grinning a bit, “Mhm, I would’ve texted or called but uh…” You glance off to the side, “I kinda… sorta… I w-wanted to see you,” You stumble out.

Gojo’s eyebrows raise and then he brings his hands up over your own, turning his head to the side a bit so that he can kiss your palm, “So you really did miss me?”

For some reason, you get embarrassed by that fact and heat rushes to your face, “N-No…”

Gojo chuckles, “It’s okay to miss me, sweetheart.” He tells you, smiling against your skin before pressing another kiss into you, “It’s not a crime, love.”

You bring your eyes to his actions, finding it adorable the way his face is mushed in your hands and how he peppers your palm with small pecks, “We both know it should be.”

“A crime for us to feel things for each other?” Gojo asks.

“You love me and I should hate you,” You explain, “The feelings we have for each other are forbidden.”

He scoffs and the look in his eyes is stern, “Ask me if I care about it being forbidden?”

“You should,” You hum, “Satoru, you blackmailed me into clearing your debt,” That he doesn’t even have, but you don’t add that bit on just yet.

“Well,” Gojo sighs heavily and then draws your hands off his face, leaning down to you a bit, “Sometimes, sacrifices need to be made in exchange for one’s happiness.”

“Are you telling me that all this was for the greater good?” You quiz as you raise a curious brow.

“Something like that, yeah,” He shrugs.

Of course, none of that makes sense to you but you don’t have it in you to argue. Gojo then looks down at your neck, his gift to you still sitting there prettily. He wonders for a moment if you ever take it off.

“Satoru,” You call, breaking him from his thoughts, “Since it’s all over… Can you uh-,”

“No,” He cuts off, “I already told you, I can’t and I won’t tell you everything until years later if you still even care by then.”

You groan a little, “I want to understand it though. How am I to just move on from this without ever knowing why it was done to begin with-”

“I told you why,” Gojo interrupts yet again. There goes that wall of his he puts up, but after learning that his debt with Nanami was a lie, you’re unsure if he’s serious or not when he says, “I was bored.”

You scoff, “All this, just because you were bored? You tormented me, a woman you claim to love, out of boredom?”

He swallows, hard, “Yeah.”

He’s lying. It’s so obvious that he is but even so, his words sting you nonetheless. If you ask him what you really want to and tell him what Nanami told you, you’ll probably get the truth but, that’s exactly what you’re afraid of.

Shaking your head at him, you sigh, “You are many things Gojo Satoru,” You whisper as you bring a hand to his face once more, caressing his skin and watching how he struggles not to melt to your touch, “A good liar is not one of them. A decent actor, maybe. But,” Your brows push together, “How long will you pretend to be a bad person when I know that’s not what you are?”

Gojo doesn’t know what to do with himself when you see right through him like this. So, instead, he chuckles, “Until it’s safe to tell you the truth.”

“Where’s the danger in the truth?” You ask carefully, searching his eyes for the honesty, “Hm?”

He doesn’t answer your question. Instead, he goes a different direction with his response.

“The person I am around you now,” Gojo’s words leave his lips slowly, as if he’s carefully piecing them together, “Is not the person who fell in love with you. A-And, that person, that version of me… he… he’s done some pretty fucked up shit. Sure, the list and the blackmail are bad but…” He looks away, “I’ve done worse.”

You blink, “I-”

“For you,” Gojo adds on, “I’ve done worse, for you.”

That claim holds so much weight to it. Hell, it leads you to quick assumptions that scare you to think about, “Satoru…”

“Yes, love?” He responds, his eyes on yours calmly.

“Did you…” You swallow, “Did you hurt someone by any chance?”

Gojo doesn’t reply.

You blink, trying to calm the chill his lack of response gives you, “You can tell me, y’know.”

“I can’t actually,” He corrects.

“Satoru, are you like, some kinda crazy obsessive yandere?” You say jokingly, laughing at your own question and trying to lighten the sudden tension.

He doesn’t laugh though, which is genuinely scary. “I’m not crazy,” Gojo utters, his voice low and dark, “And yandere is a bit of a stretch.”

“So…” Your hand steadily leaves his face and the soft touches between the two of you are severed, “What about obsessive?”

Gojo glances to the side for a moment, “Define obsessive to me.”

“Well, obsessive is the nature of an obsession and an obsession is the filling of the mind of someone continuously and intrusively, so much so that it becomes troubling,” You define flawlessly, “If I’m interpreting this correctly… Satoru are you saying you’re obsessed with me?”

“If that’s the definition then,” His gaze drags over to your face and swirled in with his look of pure love is in fact this darkened shade of an obsession, “Yes, yes I am obsessed with you.”

You nod, not exactly wrapping your head around the gravity of his claims, “Right… And if that’s the case, is this obsession of yours what led you to hurt someone?”

“I never said I hurt anyone.” He murmurs. His voice is chillingly calm.

Your nerves are rising and goosebumps are decorating your skin unknowingly, “You never said you didn’t.”

“Why’re you asking me all these questions anyway?” Gojo asks suddenly, chuckling a bit as he tries to redirect the conversation, “Shouldn’t you be out with Choso right now confessing your love to him-”

“Don’t change the subject, Satoru.” You say, your voice firm and this slight shake heard through your words, “You just told me you’re fucking obsessed with me like some kinda’ stalker and implied that you’ve hurt someone because of it.”

Oh? You were… upset? Gojo has this weird feeling in his chest as he realizes that. His true red flags were becoming more and more transparent as the seconds passed but never does he show the white one hidden behind him.

“I mean,” He shrugs, as if it was no big deal, “What do you want me to say?”

Your face twists up in aggravation, “How about the truth?”

“Can’t do that, sweetheart. I feel like a broken record repeating that to you-”

“So am I supposed to just take all the info you just gave me and be happy with that?”

“Yes, actually,” Gojo shrugs, “Yes, you are.”

And just like that, you’re set off nicely, “Right so now I know that not only are you a blackmailer, you also have a screw loose which is why you blackmailed me in the first place because apparently, you don’t know the difference between love and a sick obsession.”

He laughs a bit, clearly not taking your emotions seriously, “That’s not-”

“And so, with this obsession of yours, you became so ridiculously infatuated with me and that’s what led to the creation of that list, right? Because you didn’t know how to talk to me like a sane human being, you took your obsession and used that to bring me down this dark path with you.”

“Sweetheart, I-”

“Now I’m in a position where I don’t know what to believe about you or who you are and I have to go the rest of my life not only not knowing the truth but also lying to Choso about this whole thing because there is absolutely no way he’ll still want to be with me if he finds out he was only ever a name on some list to check off.”

He just falls quiet, staring at your poor confused eyes. He really has taken you through a whirlwind of emotions, hasn’t he? It’s unfortunate that it had to be you in this position but, he knows he had no other choice.

“I mean,” Gojo’s voice is small now, “What did you think I meant when I said I'm sorry for loving you and that that’s what caused all this-”

“No, don’t give me that bullshit,” You spit out, “Love isn’t what caused this. You caused this, Satoru.”

“I…”

“You and this weird…” You take a step back from him suddenly, “Obsession.” The way you say that word lets him know you’re almost repulsed by hearing such a thing.

He sighs, “Sweets, listen-”

“Don’t.” You cut off, “Don’t call me that. D-Don’t call me anything.”

“Are you…” Gojo’s eyes narrow and he studies both your body language and your expression, “Does that information scare you?”

“What?” You scoff.

“Me being obsessed with you.” He clarifies.

Does he even hear himself right now? “You sound like a madman,” You say. Then, you take a deep breath and just shake all your thoughts away, “But, y’know what,” You throw your hands up in a shrug, “I’ll just pretend I never heard this.”

“I-”

“No, save it. I’ll just pretend I don’t know you’re absolutely fucking crazy a-and I’ll just uh, go confess my love to Choso,” You claim, nervously laughing at the whole thing.

Gojo’s confession to him being obsessed with you had driven you just about as crazy as him at this point. Any further with this conversation and you might actually lose your mind.

“So you do love him?” Gojo asks.

You simply shrug and scoff, turning to the nearby door, “I don’t know.”

Gojo moves and grabs a careful hold of your arm but it… it scares you. Genuine fear coursed through your veins and when you looked up at the white-haired man, for the first time ever, you were genuinely terrified.

“S-Satoru…” You whisper, voice trembling.

The man’s hold on you doesn’t let up and he steps closer to you, “Sweetheart, you know I’d never hurt you, right?”

God, he is really worrying you right now. “U-Uhm, yeah I think I know that b-but,” You glance down at his hand on your arm, “Can you let me go?”

Gojo does the opposite and pulls you closer to him, “Why are you looking at me like that?” He questions, his voice softening.

He must not have realized how intimidating he seemed right now. Perhaps you truly didn’t ever realize just how deep his love for you goes. “Like what?” You squeak out.

He tilts his head, “Like you’re… like you’re afraid of me.”

“Satoru,” Your voice is still shaky but you’re trying to keep yourself together, “An obsession like the one you have with me, i-it isn’t healthy.”

“Why not?” Gojo asks so innocently. He really didn’t understand the danger behind his own emotions.

“Because…” You stare back and forth between his left and right eyes, trying to calm yourself from being scared. It’s just Gojo, right? “Because, that, Satoru, that’s a crime.”

“To be obsessed with you is a crime?” He questions, innocence and ignorance reflected in his gaze.

You give him a little comforting smile, something about the situation is still unsettling but because it’s Gojo, it’s easier for you to just ignore the chill creeping up along your spine, “Just as loving me isn’t a crime, being obsessed with me is.”

Gojo blinks, “How?”

Your voice is so gentle with him that he honestly felt like a patient of therapy for a moment, “Because look at what it’s led to.”

He nods understandingly. Only you could ever be able to effectively explain the wrongs behind his emotions, “I see… But, I can’t just… stop this feeling.”

“I understand that,” You say, nodding a bit, “B-But, try uhm… try to control it, yeah?”

“Is that what you want me to do?” He asks.

Your brows furrow, “Satoru this isn’t for me, it’s for you.”

Gojo didn’t understand the concept behind that sentence. To him, he’s nothing more than a slave to you and whatever emotions you feel for him. From the moment you came to see him today, he felt his false persona chipping away up until he revealed to you his true feelings.

Gojo Satoru’s love for you did, in fact, run deeper than imagined. That’s part of the truth behind the situation and what he’s put you through but, he still can’t tell you everything. So, for now, you knowing this dark secret of his will have to do.

“Okay,” He hums.

You swallow and look down at his hand still on you, “Can uh… Can I go now?”

Gojo mimics you and looks down at his grasp. When had it grown so tight? Steadily, he loosens his grip on you and releases a sigh, he doesn’t even know what exactly came over him for a second, “Y-Yeah, sorry.”

You shrug, “It’s okay. Um, if or when I figure things out with Choso,” You look up at Gojo one last time, “I’ll let you know?”

“You’re not obligated to,” He hums.

You snicker, “I mean, you and I still have a journal to burn together so… We’ll have to see each other again regardless.”

Gojo raises a skeptical brow at you, “Why didn’t you bring it today?”

You freeze, “W-Well uhh…”

“You wanted an excuse to see me more than once, didn’t you?”

With a sheepish giggle, you nod, “Yeah, maybe.”

The man shakes his head and then his hands suddenly move to grab your face and pull you toward him again, “Sweetheart you can’t just say things like that and expect me not to lose my mind.”

You laugh at his dramatics, turning a blind eye to the major red flag he’s presenting through his obsession, “But it’s true, I could’ve brought it today but, I dunno’ I feel like the journal can be burned any day. It doesn’t have to be today.”

“Right…” Gojo hums.

You meet his eyes and he meets yours. Your faces are close to one another and it’s so obvious what he wants to do. “Satoru…” You whisper.

“Yes?” He replies.

“I know you wanna’ kiss me,” You tease.

“I do,” Gojo whines, he’s so desperate all of a sudden, “I really really want to.”

One more can’t hurt, right? A kiss to say bye, perhaps?

“Ask for it,” You whisper.

Gojo’s eyes lower, “Can I kiss you, my love?”

Yeah, in what world could you say no to that? You’re nodding before you even realize it, both of your eyes shutting gently as Gojo leans in and presses his lips to yours. As usual, a kiss from him is enough for you to blind yourself.

Who cares that he’s obsessed with you? How bad can that really be? Who cares that he blackmailed you, it’s over now, right? Everything’s going to be fine so who cares about any of that stuff anymore?

Gojo’s lips are soft, like always, against your own and his tongue is slow and tender to move into your mouth. He’s holding your face in his hands with zero intentions of letting you go and you simply melt into the loving feeling of his kisses.

If there’s one thing about this man you’ll never be able to get over…

It’s his kisses.

He can be obsessed with you, that’s fine.

You’re obsessed with the way he kisses you so, maybe… just maybe, Gojo was right that one night…

Maybe you and him are the same-- two broken people trying to figure out what to do with themselves and the emotions they experience.

In the end, what could go wrong?

GOJO SATORU ✔︎ 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘋𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘺: 𝙀𝙖𝙨𝙮

GETO SUGURU ✔︎ 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘋𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘺: 𝙀𝙖𝙨𝙮

TOJI FUSHIGURO ✔︎ 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘋𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘺: 𝙈𝙚𝙙𝙞𝙪𝙢

KAMO CHOSO ✔︎ 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘋𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘺: 𝙎𝙚𝙢𝙞-𝙈𝙚𝙙𝙞𝙪𝙢 / 𝙀𝙖𝙨𝙮

ZEN'IN NAOYA ✔︎ 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘋𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘺: 𝙀𝙭𝙩𝙧𝙚𝙢𝙚𝙡𝙮 𝙀𝙖𝙨𝙮

ITADORI SUKUNA ✔︎ 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘋𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘺: 𝙎𝙚𝙢𝙞-𝙀𝙖𝙨𝙮???

NANAMI KENTO ✔�� 𝘛𝘳𝘶𝘦 𝘋𝘪𝘧𝘧𝘪𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘺: 𝙃𝙖𝙧𝙙

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@blognicole @suguruologist @luqueam @ivoryviness @sinaxalui @rxnnie18 @carlacujo @gods-landing @bitchysouljellyfish @miles4hour @sinaxalui @annananamin @heart-snow @kiyomizzx @hanuh @acehyacinth @mccookiemonster @tojis-ball-sack @cartwheel6869 @mariluvsusstuff @addie1010 @slammynics @actualz0mbie @hisbitchhh @kay-xle @cunttee3 @voids-universe @raininglovelyfire @itsbokutosjuicyass @peaceoutbritta @barbielani @gennaray @r3inae @kfmcykdy @camiihutt @tokina @curtin81937 @hopefullydecent @nameless-shade @ureuphoriasworld @forgetfulmachine @legbouk @lilliaannn @clementineee0-0 @divinelseraph @didibxx

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loggiepj · 2 months ago

Text

To Love A Lannister

chapter 12 | chapter 13

Long golden blonde hair. Captivating green eyes as green as the grass in the meadows back in Dorne or from the Reach. Her laugh. Her voice.

Her voice. Agitated. Hurt. Lonely.

I love you.

The first time you stirred awake, it was some time in the evening. You could tell from the darkness in the room, with only the light from the candles lit on your table helping your vision. And as if triggered on, the pain all around your body made itself known.

You let out a small groan, stopped short when you could feel movement on your left. Craning your head to look, you could see someone with golden hair sleeping with her head on her arms.

Cersei. No, it couldn't be her. Because the woman beside you was holding your left hand tight in hers as she slept. And Cersei was not known to be that affectionate. Surely, you were not that worthy to be cared for by the Queen Mother.

Another pain shot up in your head, making you grunt and shut your eyes.

"Y/n?" Cersei's sleepy voice made through your ears before darkness has taken you once again.

~~~

It was day time the next time you were awake. Cersei wasn't there with you, making you think if you had only been dreaming about her.

Instead, there were Oberyn and Ellaria, welcoming you with full smiles on their faces. You could no longer feel any pain in your body. In fact, you were feeling elated, as if you were floating.

"Wa. . . Water," you managed to croak out. Ellaria hurriedly helped you up to give you a tiny sip of water. You had never felt your mouth so dry since the last time you made that silly expedition to Braavos as an act of rebellion against your father.

You looked around the room, looking for a certain woman that had been haunting your dreams. "Cersei?"

Ellaria chuckled. "She left for the Maester."

Oberyn snorted another laugh. "You just woke up from defeating the Mountain and the first two things you look for are water and Cersei."

You smiled from ear to ear, as you raised your arm before you, forefinger tracing the ceiling. "I feel like I'm . . . I'm flying."

"Qyburn has given you milk of the poppy for the pain," Oberyn said. "Probably a lot, I guess."

Eventually, your eyelids droop to a close as you went back into deep sleep, still smiling.

~~~

It was Tyrion who visited the chambers next when you woke up the third time. He was reading from a scroll when he noticed you stir awake.

"Lady Y/n," Tyrion said, climbing over a small ladder to see you. "The one who finally beat the Mountain."

You softly chuckled, a dull pain in your head.

"I'm forever in your debt, Lady Y/n," he went on. "Whatever you need, I'll do everything I can to give you."

"Water?" you suggested.

Tyrion only laughed as he helped you drink from a water goblet.

"You know . . . I was wrong."

You glanced at him, your mouth too weak to utter, as you lay back on the bed.

"I thought my sister will never be able to care for someone other than her children. I swore there was one time she almost beheaded one of the handmaidens who took care of you," he chuckled before he went silent, his eyes on the golden necklace with a lion pendant laid on the bedside table. Cersei's necklace. "But I believe you're no longer obliged to marry her, given the news about you offering Yronwood to set you both free from the marriage. Gone are the days of torment."

It made you feel sadness. You had no idea why. It was you who had fully decided to offer it to Tywin the first place. "H-How did she react?"

He only shrugged his shoulders. "I can tell she was a bit taken aback. But I haven't always been able to read Cersei growing up. She doesn't let her emotions show. You don't have to worry though, the future is not yet written. Just take a rest now."

~~~

Oberyn was there to visit you some time later, after Qyburn had changed the dressings of your wound. Apparently, you had broken some of your ribs and there were some bones disalignment, but none the Maester couldn't handle.

Taking advantage of the privacy, Oberyn began discussing to you in whispers that you'd be heading to Dorne soon and that he had something to show you about your birthright.

A lot had happened the time you were asleep. Stannis was executed by the Boltons, led by Lord Ramsay of House Bolton, who was said to be married to Sansa Stark. You could tell luck hadn't been good to Sansa, as you heard tales about Ramsay being a much worse monster than Joffrey.

"Winter is coming," Oberyn said out of nowhere. Your eyes only widened. You knew what he was talking about. You had read about the White Walkers and heard myths about them, but you always thought it was only a drunkard's gossip.

"The Lord Commander of the Night's Watch, Jon Snow, sent a raven to every Lords in Westeros," he continued, pulling a scroll from his pocket, the same one you saw Tyrion was reading. "He witnessed it firsthand. And I think it's urgent that we moved south as quick as possible, knowing north would be attacked first."

"But . . . We couldn't just leave—"

"She's not your obligation anymore, Y/n," he said, knowing you were referring to Cersei. "But the sooner you get home, the sooner we'll figure out what to do about your succession."

"What do you mean? Daenerys is the Queen."

"You're four years older than her. Your sister Daenerys was born in Dragonstone where your mother Rhaella was last seen, before Stannis . . . before Stannis executed them all."

You could only grit your teeth. "But I'm a bastard. I'm not the rightful heir."

Oberyn looked around the room to ensure it was empty before he went on, "Daenerys is the Queen, Y/n. We're not contesting to that. Do you know why the Martells was the last house to swear fealty to King Robert? It was because we always believe Targaryens are the rightful heirs to the Iron Throne. But whenever someone wants to get that throne, what awaits them?"

There was a small pause. "Death," Oberyn said, "It's going to be difficult for Daenerys to get back the Iron Throne, it might even kill her. That's why she would need you by her side. You're the last two living Targaryens."

~~~

You awoke alone some time that night. Hearing the door creak open, you turned to look at the intruder.

It was Cersei. When she noticed you awake, she hesitated to enter until she stepped forward then closed the door behind her.

And gods, she looked so beautiful, you thought you were already dead upon witnessing such beauty.

"How are you feeling?" she asked as she approached the bed slowly.

"Like I just got beaten by the Mountain," you responded, giving her a weak smile.

She chuckled softly, reaching the side of your bed. Her laughter rarely contained genuine amusement, but not when around you.

"You have the most beautiful laugh I've ever heard," you said, making the Lannister woman meet your gaze. "I've been dreaming about it. Your face. Your eyes. . . Sorry, Maester Qyburn said there might still be after effects from the milk of the poppy."

Cersei laughed as her hand went to hold yours, before letting go, turning her head to avoid your eyes.

"Oberyn said you're leaving the day after tomorrow," she said.

"So I've been told," you confirmed. "Oberyn might be too proud to admit it, but I think he misses their children."

Cersei smiled back before her lips turned into a frown, her eyes meeting yours.

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why did you offer Yronwood?"

You threaded your fingers with hers and she took them. "I . . . I just thought you've been tortured enough that you don't deserve this. You should be allowed to marry someone you love at least. Or not to marry anyone at all if you don't feel like it."

There was silence. Cersei then went to sit on the side of the bed, eyes glistening with tears. "Are you sure it's not just me you're avoiding?"

You lifted your other hand forward and cupped her face, thumb tracing the tear off her cheek. She leaned unto your touch, closing her eyes.

"I will always love you, Cersei," you declared. "But you don't have to love me back."

She opened her eyes slowly, meeting yours. And you could tell hers spoke of uncertainty and adoration.

~~~

"I just can't believe it." Oberyn had been staring at you for a while as you helped the crew of the Martell ship.

When you didn't bother answering, your uncle only laughed. You sighed and placed the crate you were carrying on the floor. "What?"

"Y/n Martell," he announced proudly. "The one who finally killed the Mountain. The one who obtained justice for her aunt and cousins' death. I'm sure your father would be proud."

You forced a smile his way as you went back to what you were doing. You were sailing back home that day. Tywin had agreed to trust the Martells after the trial that almost got yourself killed.

Yet, you weren't sure what to expect back home. Oberyn told you there was something he'd show about your birthright. And with the fact you now knew Prince Doran was your real father, it didn't sit well on you how he'd react if he knew the truth.

With Trystane being your half brother, who you only heard from Ellaria that morning was engaged to Cersei's daughter, Princess Myrcella, things only got more complicated.

But that wasn't what you were sad about. It was because Cersei didn't show up and said her goodbyes to you when you left the palace. She wasn't even in the dining hall when you were all breaking the fast with the Lannisters, sending you blessings for your trip.

You didn't even get the chance to say goodbye. Not that she hadn't visited you since that night she cried on your bed with her hand in yours. The only souvenir you got was her necklace, hidden underneath your tunic. Cersei gave it to you that night, saying it was a gift from her mother, that it was special to her. And that was all you needed to know that you were special to her too.

You missed her terribly and you hadn't even left the Capital yet.

"Someone's going to get a farewell's kiss." Oberyn's voice brought you back to the present, making you straighten your posture and glare back at the Dornishman.

Oberyn then motioned his head behind you. And when you turned to glance, there she was, in her red flowing dress and golden hair elegantly braided. Cersei was heading your way, with what appeared were knights, handmaidens and servants trotting along behind her.

You bowed and greeted her when she reached the deck. "Your Grace."

"Lady Y/n," she said with a smile. "Prince Oberyn. I apologize for such a short notice but Tommen has advised me to visit Myrcella following the news of her engagement with Prince Trystane. A daughter will always need her mother's counsel, whether her suitor is good enough for her or not." Cersei's eyes were on your neck, the golden chain of her necklace visible. "Besides, it'll be nice to see Myrcella. I haven't seen her for a long time now."

Your eyes never left Cersei, stunned about what she said. Is she telling you she's going with you to Dorne?

When Oberyn nudged your arm, you finally snapped out of trance. "Yes, yes, we will set you a cabin, Your Grace."

Cersei thanked you before walking past you both, her perfume lingering around. Her servants, handmaidens and queensguard followed her through the ship, your eyes expecting a certain tall golden haired man with a fake gold hand.

"Where's Ser Jaime?" you couldn't help but ask.

"He couldn't come," Cersei replied as she turned back to you, giving you a somewhat mischievous smile before she let herself be led by one of the Dornish crew to her cabin.

#cersei lannister x reader #cersei lannister #lena headey #game of thrones #a song of ice and fire #g!p reader #angst

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