#dearraven

[ravenstodaisies]

Dear Raven,

I'd say my week has had a similar vibe. Kind of stressful yet mundane at the same time. My biggest news of the week is that I am officially a resident of the new area I moved to. I was finally able to get my learner's license transferred. When I found out last week that I would have to do another knowledge test I was sent into a bit of an anxious spiral. I mean it has been about 9 years since I last did one. As per usual it was not as bad as I thought it would be. I ended up getting all the questions right and it only took me about 15 minutes. Leave it to me to catastrophize and then end up getting a perfect score.

Like you, I also have no update on my own job search. Should I be putting more effort into it? Very much so yes. Do I feel like I have the mental energy to do so? Not at all. Unfortunately, I will have to push through the lack of motivation as my financial situation demands it.

To be honest I have reached the point where I feel as though the universe is conspiring for me to fail. Like it has decided I am not worth giving a chance. It has gotten to the point where when things don't work out for me it doesn't phase me at all because I was expecting it not to anyway. I know that is not true and that attitude does nothing to benefit me. I am trying to adjust my mindset but frankly, I am just too exhausted.

I have been trying to at least occupy some of my time with hobbies. I have been sketching, writing, and modeling with clay. While I have enjoyed doing these things none of them have really kept my attention for long.

Something new which I have found I enjoy doing is befriending the crows. Every couple of mornings they stop by outside on the front lawn and I toss them a couple handfuls of walnuts then watch them eat from afar. I tried to give them some apple but they were not thrilled about it. I think I will try a bunch of different foods until I find a few things they enjoy. For now, I at least know that walnuts are a favourite. They have already started to become less wary of me.

It really is hard to believe that it has been over a month since we last saw each other. It's funny you should mention seeing a Captain America figurine and thinking of me because I saw a Loki bag the other day and thought of you. I know we've gone longer than a month without seeing each other before but I still miss you. It's hard knowing it may be many more months until we see each other again. It is sad but I know it's just a matter of waiting and we will see each other again.

I hope the week ahead will be good for both of us!

Daisy