#dear god hold on I forgot about... whatever the hell the master and doctor are called. I can't remember how to spell it at ALL. guys.
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hey guys. whouffaldi. what the fuck
#no exclamation mark. no question mark. I need you to hear my voice. feel how deadpan this is#like what are we gonna start calling tenrose “wholfnant” or smth#LMAO ninerose could be wholfeston#or just wholf! xD#I mean it's so funny and technically I guess I get it... but why#why would you do this#it took me so long to figure out why the fuck it was called that#or what it even WAS#whouffle is bad-a-bloody enough#but whouffaldi?#somehow even more confusing#I genuinely do not know how to pronounce either of these#also think it's extra funny bc it seems so random who gets the weird fucked up ship names and who doesn't#just stick to twleveclara and elevenclara you psychos LOL#twelveclara#whouffaldi#doctor who#dear god hold on I forgot about... whatever the hell the master and doctor are called. I can't remember how to spell it at ALL. guys.
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Spies and Gods - Chapter 8
Summary: After falling through a peculiar portal, Reader meets an old "acquaintance" of Loki's.
Word Count: 2,476
A/N: Hi guys! Sorry for the long wait. Here's a quick recap of what's been going on in my life; I just got done with classes and I'm only working a few days a week, allowing me time to work on fics. Now that Endgame is out I've been thinking about how I want to end the fic and how the story will go at this point, which is what I've been planning on doing since the beginning of the story, which is why I've also been putting off writing until the movie came out (mostly my busy life and motivation got in the way, but still). I have a few ideas in mind for the ending, which I might post two or three different endings if I can't decide which one I want to use. Thanks again for kind words! <3
Chapter 7 | Chapter 9
Your body felt as if it was floating, nothing above or below you, only the feeling of weightlessness. A profusion of emotions swept through you. You’ve only been falling for a short moment but confusion, fear, and even a glimmer of peace filled you. Reality returned when you felt hands grabbing your shoulders followed by you slamming into something, hard.
You heard two thuds, the first being something you couldn’t identify, the second was your own body crashing not too long after. You groaned as the air in your chest struggled to return after it was knocked out. Everything was disoriented at first, until your vision adjusted to the room. You were in a foyer with dark walls, a large staircase in front of you, and seats against the walls that look rarely used. You didn’t recognize this place, meaning you could only fear for the worst.
Before you could do anything else, you heard a coarse groan from beneath you. Looking down you realized you landed on top of Loki, still a bit dazed from the free-fall. Loki was on his back while you landed chest first on top of him, your faces merely inches away from each other. His head was leaned back exposing his tense neck and defined jawline, his hands holding on to your shoulders in a protective grip. He didn’t shield you from the fall, did he? “Shit, you okay?” You asked, letting your weight off of him.
Loki’s gaze met yours, “You did crash into me,” he let out a single chuckle, “however, nothing is broken as far as I am aware of.”
“Good, because I need you in one piece for you to explain yourself.” A mysterious voice emerged from the stairway. A tall man in an unusual blue outfit accompanied with a red cape was leaning against the railing, eyes staring directly at Loki. “Loki Laufeyson, brother of Thor.” He let go of the railing and floated down the stairs. Great, he’s one of those people. You and Loki stood up, watching as the man levitated down. When he reached the bottom of the stairs he didn’t bother acknowledging your presence and instead went directly to Loki, “What the hell are you doing back on Earth?”
Loki placed his hands behind his back, “With all of your mystical powers, it took you this long to realize I have returned?” He asked coyly.
“I assume your magic had something to do with it,” the man said, “perhaps some sort of cloaking spell so I couldn’t see you.”
“What a shame, it was working so well up until now.” Loki slyly grinned, almost tauntingly.
“And why is that?” The man asked, “Your spell was up for this long, what caused it to drop all of a sudden?”
Loki’s glare at the man was fierce, he was ready to attack at any moment. You should probably step in before things got out of hand. “Excuse me,” you chimed in, gaining the attention of the man and Loki, “what is it that you want with Loki? He’s under official Avengers supervision. I have to get him back before they send an army to search for him.”
The man’s look was on you, eyes squinted as he finally recognized your presence. “As a protector of this realm, it is my job to keep out anything that is a threat to this Earth. Loki is one of those threats. I have warned him and his brother before that if he were ever to return I would handle it personally.” The man looked at Loki, adjusting his yellow gloves, “It’s time to take you back to Asgard.”
Loki’s posture shifted, his eyes expressed mourning. You remembered what the team told you about what happened to Asgard, Loki and Thor’s home. Loki stood frozen, his fists clenched and slightly shaking.
You raised a pleading hand to the man, “Listen, Mister…?”
“Strange, Doctor Strange.”
You knitted your eyebrows at the sound of his name, “Okay. Doctor Strange, something happened to Asgard. That’s the reason why he’s here.” You stepped closer to Loki, almost guarding him from Strange, “He’s been here for a while and you have to trust me when I say that he has had no intentions of hurting anyone.” Loki raised a brow at your statement. Here you were, standing up for the man who terrorized New York. “The Avengers have been keeping a really close eye on him. I don’t think they’ll be really happy if you take Loki away. Especially his brother.”
Strange furrowed his eyes as he held the bridge of his nose. He thought for what seemed like forever, “Who did you say you were?”
“Y/N L/N.”
“Y/N, you need to understand that Loki isn’t a man who can simply be put under house arrest. You do know what he’s capable of, correct?”
“The question is, do you know what I am truly capable of?” Loki stepped forward, knives appearing in both hands. You sighed in annoyance. Great, everything you just said was just thrown right out of the window. He took a few steps in front of you while Strange took a defensive position.
Before he could do any more damage, you stepped directly in front of Loki, blocking his path. “Loki, don’t.” You pleaded, if he was going to get in trouble, might as well prevent Loki from killing anyone.
“Unless you wish to get yourself hurt, move aside.” Loki sneered.
“Really? You’re gonna threaten me?” At this point you were starting to get pissed. Your muscles ached from the fall, all you wanted to do was go back to HQ and take a long bath. “If you want to resort to violence, be my guest. But if this guy kicks your ass, I’m not going to be the one to drag you back. Just know that I’m the only one here that tried to sincerely defend for you.”
Loki’s eyes softened, but his lips were still pursed. His jaw visibly clenched, and in defeat, he put away his knives.
You turned to Strange, “Can we leave now? We have this taken care of.”
Strange looked at you, then to Loki, then back to you before speaking, “Fine. I’ll let you take him back, on one condition. I will have to visit in person once a week to make sure he isn’t using anymore spells to fool me.”
This didn’t please Loki at all. His mood dropped lower than before, anger rising within him. You felt a small amount of sympathy for him, having to be watched all the time now a magic man has to babysit him. Either way, there was no other answer that Strange would like, “Deal. But I have to run it by the team first.”
“Sounds fair.” Strange swept his cape behind him before he lifted his hands in front of him, “I’ll return you both to where you were-”
“No!” You and Loki yelled simultaneously, neither of you wanted to go through Strange’s weird portal again.
Strange looked at you two questionably, “Oh, it won’t be a problem-”
“Thank you, Doctor Strange,” you interjected, “but I think I’ll just call a ride. I might puke if you do that… whatever, again.”
“Fair enough. Would you like some coffee or tea, Y/N?”
“I would love some. Let me call Stark first.” Tony was the closest you could think of that wasn’t busy on a mission like the others. You could’ve called Thor, but you doubted that he knew how to drive or even had a cell phone.
“Stark? As in Tony Stark?”
You took your phone out of your pocket and dialed Tony’s number in, “Yeah. I’m his kid.”
“Oh, I didn’t realize that he had children.”
You exhaled, “Neither did he.”
Some time later, Loki settled down (to some degree) while you and Strange had coffee. He showed you around and even introduced his cape to you, which was sentient and somehow not the weirdest thing you’ve encountered after your little portal trip. He explained who the Masters of the Mystic Arts are and what they do, how they protect the Earth for possibly thousands of years. It amazed you that a group of magic users hid in plain sight for this long. You knew groups like Hydra tried to hide in plain sight, but they were never known to be subtle.
You all made your way back to the foyer when you heard knocking at the door. Strange used his magic to open the doors by themselves.
Stark entered followed by Thor, but not in a cheery mood. Stark was wearing one of his finer suits that he usually wore at meetings or press conferences. Shit, you completely forgot that he was in a meeting.
“Loki.” Thor said harshly, eyebrows knit. When Loki saw his brother he immediately looked fearful. He knew the difference when Thor was annoyed or genuinely angered. This was one of those angry times. “What is the meaning of this? You told me you already spoke to Doctor Strange and had everything settled between the two of you.”
“Oh, did I?” Loki taunted, “Might have been a lie, dear brother. Do you really think I would come back to this second rate sorcerer and ask to be among Midgardians? It was much more simple to cast a spell that hid us from his forces.”
“Us? You cloaked me as well?”
“Well, not only you.” Thor raised an eyebrow in confusion, “Think about it, an entire cargo ship with hundreds of Asgardians would not go unnoticed.”
Strange turned to Loki, his temper rising, “I’m sorry, an entire cargo ship filled with what ?!”
Thor went stoic, even with one eye his stare bore deep through Loki, “Brother, what did you do?”
All eyes were on Loki now as he tried to play it cool with a coy smile. Unfortunately for him his trickster charms weren’t working. “Remember on Asgard when Heimdall couldn’t see me arrive or leave when I used the secret passages?” Thor continued his stern gaze, waiting for Loki to continue, “I figured I would do something similar with a simple spell not too long before we arrived… on nearly one hundred Asgardians.”
A sharp inhale went out of Thor’s nostrils. He rubbed his forehead in disbelief, “That’s why you have been different lately. This explains the lack of pranks and your use of magic in front of anyone.”
“You focused all of your magical energy to keep your people hidden.” Strange cut in, “Exactly how long did you expect to hold this spell? Surely not the rest of your life as it would drain you from the inside out.”
Loki rolled his eyes, “Of course I wouldn’t go on for that long. For the last month I’ve slowly been letting about a dozen people at a time go from the spell. To anyone like you who can tell the shift in your world, it would merely look like Midgard’s birthrate was slightly higher, but not abnormal.” He looked at Thor, “Did you ever wonder why nobody else has noticed a large ship coming through the atmosphere other than Stark and his little team? And they only knew because we contacted them before entrance.”
The room filled with silence as everyone was trying to process what Loki had done. It didn’t do any harm to the people of Asgard, but to be hidden away and not noticed by the entire world was too far. The Asgardians probably didn’t know Earth didn’t know about them. Here they were, trying to get by with help from only the Avengers when the world could’ve chipped in if they had any idea what was going on. The thought of innocent people under the watch of Earth’s mightiest heroes were struggling to get a hold of their new life when it could easily be fixed bothered you. There are millions of others in the world who need help as well, but this would be a quick start.
“Break the spell now.” You didn’t ask, you demanded. Loki looked at you as if you were some foreign object in the room, “Strange knows. There’s no need for this trick to go on any longer.”
Loki saw the other men silently agree. He knew he didn’t have any say in this. He wanted to say something more, but decided against it. Loki closed his eyes and with a slight clench of his fist, a tiny ripple of gold flowed around his hand. “There. It is done.” He said with a stiff tone.
“Now that that’s taken care of,” Strange pitched in, turning to Tony, “I do trust that the Avengers will keep an extremely close eye on Loki, but I will be making visits to your headquarters every once in a while to make sure he doesn’t have any more tricks up his sleeve.”
Tony was rather annoyed that Strange would show up on his own terms, but reluctantly agreed. Who else would know more about magical fiascos than an actual wizard? “Cool, now we have wizards guarding the castle with the dragon. See you around, Strange. Y/N, Wiseau, car. Now.” Tony spoke to the two of you as if you were children caught breaking a window.
He didn’t look at you as he led everyone outside, revealing a crowd of about a dozen people forming around the highly expensive car. When a few people noticed Tony and Thor, everyone turned and begged for autographs and photos. Tony smiled politely as you all trudged through the crowd, only saying hello and waving to a few people. Thor, on the other hand, took multiple selfies and hugged every other fan like a proper celebrity.
You noticed Loki visibly rolling his eyes at his brother, “Tough being the younger brother?” You asked him.
“Thor’s fame seems to follow him wherever we are.” Loki responded, “The devotees were mild compared to here, but nonetheless the spotlight is brighter in his direction.”
It took longer than intended to reach the car with all these people around. Before entering the car, you heard murmurs coming from the crowd. You made out a few words, which turned to sentences as more and more people talked.
“Who’s that girl?”
“Isn’t that Loki?”
“You don’t think Tony left his fiance for this chick, do you?”
“Maybe she’s Thor’s new girlfriend.”
“No way, Jane was far cooler.”
“Maybe she’s dating Loki.”
“That’s more believable than her and Thor.”
That was enough gossip for one day. You slipped into the back seat of the car, the door muffling the voices of the groupies. Loki sat in the seat next to you, refusing to look anywhere but out the window. Tony and Thor followed soon after, Thor taking the passenger side. Tony slammed the door harshly, then revved the car, speeding away from Bleecker street.
#spies and gods#spies and gods chapter 8#chapter 8#loki x reader#Loki Laufeyson#mcu#marvel#reader insert#fanfic#my fic#fanfiction#loki fanfic#loki fanfiction
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Leon’s Plight (Or, “Klaus and ELoise’s House Is Fucking Exhausting”)
I literally couldn’t come up with a decent title so here’s this. Part 2 baby and I’m reaching for 3 because I’m loving this plot of Leon realizing that batshit crazy Jo is the most normal part of his life. @carolionel
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Leon thought he could have a pretty decent time staying with Klaus and Eloise for a while. They insisted that the guest room was his as long as he needed it, and that they didn't want any sort of payment, though Leon intended to figure out some way to do that without them knowing. But by day three of being apart from Jo, he didn't know how well he could handle 'a while'.
For one thing, the guest room was directly beneath the master bedroom. The first night staying over, Leon was reminded of being in 2-Fort and frequently being disturbed at night by Klaus's sneezing. Leon gripped at his hair in frustration after the third time of waking up. "Jesus Christ, how did I never smother him with a pillow?” he asked himself aloud, wondering how Eloise wasn’t an exhausted, cranky mess every day.
The next night, he moved to the couch in the basement, which was done up nicely as a den. Leon insisted to Klaus and Eloise that he just wasn't terribly comfortable in the guest room, so he wouldn't offend Klaus with the real reasons (He didn't care too much if he did offend, but he had seen Eloise go absolutely apeshit over someone hurting Klaus's feelings, and he wasn't interested in his name being added to the list of those who had suffered at her hand). Unfortunately, the basement was directly beneath Klaus's office, which was apparently one of their favorite love-making spots. After hearing Eloise's desperate gasps of her husband's name each time the pictures on the walls shook, Leon couldn't help but feel like he didn't know these two quite as well as he thought he did. He hadn't expected this out of Eloise and Klaus. Eloise, so prim and proper and soft, and Klaus, so nervous and self-conscious. Of course, they were adults we were sexually attracted to one another, and sex was a basic human urge. Maybe he always pictures them in a meek missionary position with the lights off. God, why was he imagining them in any position?
He did miss sex, though. He missed holding Jolene afterward even more.
Another thing was that Klaus and Eloise's home was a bit more open than Leon was used to. He nearly had a heart attack when he went into the kitchen early the next morning to find Spencer comfortably having a bowl of cereal at the breakfast bar.
"Hey! 'Sup, Sasquatch?" the ex-Scout asked casually around a spoonful of Fruit Loops.
"You--! Mein Gott! What the hell are you doing here!?"
"Having breakfast. B forgot to get milk again."
"Again? How often does this happen?"
"Meh....once, twice a week?" Spencer shrugged before swallowing quickly and grinning when Eloise came into the kitchen with baby Leon on her hip. "Hey, little Rozzy!"
Little Leon, who had previously been sleepily resting against Eloise's shoulder, immediately brightened and grinned at Spencer. "Ayyyy!" he cooed in the closest thing to 'hi' that he could manage.
"Oh, good morning, Spencer!" Eloise smiled, about to set her son in his high chair before Spencer held his arms out. She chuckled and handed the baby to him. "Would you like some waffles with that? I was just getting ready to whip some up for Klaus before he goes to work."
"Ah, hey, that'd be great! Thanks much!" Spencer beamed, giving the baby's cheek an affectionate pinch as he held him. "Are you gonna have waffles, too? Are ya?" he hummed, and the baby reacted with another delighted squeal.
"Do people frequently just...waltz in whenever?" Leon couldn't help but ask Eloise while Spencer was busy with the baby.
"Oh, all the time!" Eloise smiled, clearly delighted with having her friends around whenever.
Leon couldn't help a depressed sigh as he went back down the hall, thinking of how Jolene would probably punch somebody's teeth out if they went into their home unannounced. He missed her terribly.
That third night, Leon opted out of the guest room and the basement, and instead lay on the cozy loveseat in the nursery. Little Leon snuggled against his chest, sleeping comfortably with a blanket tucked around him. The doctor had tried sleeping on the love seat while the baby stayed in his crib, but the latter wasn't very happy with someone being nearby and NOT holding him, so Leon eventually just scooped him up. Leon himself was nearly asleep when he felt a presence, and he opened his eyes a crack to see Klaus standing in the doorway.
"Oh! Sorry...." Klaus said softly. "Eloise and I can usually hear the baby breathing on the monitor..." he said, looking to the small device situated on the side of the crib. "I-I got a little worried...."
"It's fine.....he's comfortable like this...." Leon said, gingerly rubbing the baby's back. "He's very easy to please...."
Klaus smiled softly and nodded, about to go back to his bedroom before coming to sit at the edge of the loveseat. He was quiet a moment before asking, "You don't like staying here, do you?"
Leon looked down to Little Leon when he stirred slightly. "It's not that I don't like staying here, Klaus, I just..."
"You miss your own home, of course...."
"And Jo," Leon sighed.
Klaus nodded before looking to Leon. "Maybe it's not my place to say, but....Maybe you should talk with Sebastian." When Leon only glared at him, he fumbled over his words to continue. "Er--well--I know you two aren't fond of each other...But Jo has known him for years and trusts him...And he only wants her happiness..." Leon snorted and rolled his eyes. "He wants her to want him. That's why he only comes around when his allergies are giving him grief..." "To be fair, the man seems to be allergic to most things, so I doubt there are many times when he isn't suffering in some way or another..." Klaus shrugged. "I-It's something to think about...I would suggest asking Phineas to intervene, but Dahlia is still recovering from that rough birth of hers a few months ago...I doubt this is the sort of thing they'd want to deal with at the moment....What about Lionel?"
Again, Leon rolled his eyes. "What's Lionel going to do? Cry? Hide behind his Pyro girlfriend?"
Klaus was prepared to argue before nodding. "Ah, true....Well, with Phineas and Lionel out, I think Sebastian is the only real solution you have....Unless Jolene decides she wants to see you again. Which doesn't seem very likely at this point. It's hard to tell how she's feeling...."
At this last word, Leon straightened up. "Feeling! Eloise---"
"Please, please don't ask that of Elly..." Klaus winced. "She hates to tap into people's emotions without permission..."
"Then she can get Jolene's permission!"
"Shhh, you'll wake Leon..." Klaus shushed him softly, though the baby remained sleeping soundly.
Leon shook his head and sighed. "Look, Klaus, I know it's hard for her. But I think it's harder for her to know how much pain Jo is in...."
Klaus considered this a moment before biting his lip. "...I'll talk to her. But you know she'll say yes just because she loves you so dearly...."
Leon briefly felt a touch of heartburn, before realizing it was the warmth of knowing she cared for him so much. "And I'll tell her how dearly I love her, too," he said softly, hoping Klaus knew how desperate he was for this. "You know I never even consider uttering something like that...."
Klaus sighed and reached to place a hand on his son's back. "Like I said....I'll talk to her...."
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"So?" Leon couldn't help but practically pounce on Eloise the next morning when she came back through the door. "How is she feeling?"
Eloise sighed and ran a hand through her wavy dark hair. "She feels like she never wants to see you again."
"I know, she already told me that..."
"No, you don't understand," Eloise said in a serious manner that was a little unsettling. "People can say whatever they like. You could look me in the eye right now and tell me that you were excited to do something, but if you really were dreading it, I would feel it. I felt the hate in her heart, Leon. Well, I did before she threw a test tube at me and screamed for me to leave. Her emotions are on a rampage and she's losing her mind. Not to suggest that it was all there before...."
Leon swallowed a fierce lump at her description of Jolene's damaged heart. He groaned and rubbed his temples. "I....I suppose I have no choice but to go to Sebastian...."
"Oh!" Eloise beamed, all smiles once again. "I just love Sebastian! Let me get my coat, and I'll go with you!" ------ He shouldn't have brought Eloise.
"Did you bring me my ex-daughter-in-law so she could ensure that I don't mercilessly tear you limb from limb for what you said to Jolene?" Sebastian hummed pleasantly to Leon, pouring Eloise a hot cup of tea.
Leon desperately wanted to snatch this pompous ass by the collar, but he knew that would only earn him further anger from Jolene. Eloise smiled kindly to Sebastian, and Leon couldn't help but feel a pang of resentment that she didn't defend him right away. He could instantly tell that she felt this negativity, and she gave him a calm expression that read, Just wait. "Sebastian, you're an absolute gem. I was wondering, and you're more than welcome to say no, but...." Out of nowhere, her smile faded. Eloise's plump bottom lip trembled, and she sobbed weakly into her hands.
Sebastian's polite expression faltered, and his brow knit worriedly. "Eloise? Dear, are you quite alright?"
Leon remained quiet, only able to blink in surprise at her sudden change.
"It's-- I'm so sorry, Sebastian, but...This has taken such a heavy toll on me..." she breathed, taking a handkerchief to dab at her eyes. "I feel everything Jolene is so heavily, and....she's so miserable...I've tried everything to get her to open up...But I think the only thing that could possibly help her is reconciling with Leon...."
Sebastian frowned as he looked to the other German gentleman. "Why would that assist her, my dear? All he's done is break her heart."
"He IS her heart, Sebastian," Eloise said softly, sniffling as another round of tears streamed down her cheeks. "She loves him with every inch of her being...we just have to get her shell to crack so she can remember that..."
Sebastian rubbed under his chin as he considered this. He looked between Eloise and Leon before sighing deeply. "...Fine," he said to Leon. "I'll help you."
Out of the corner of his eye, Leon caught a brief glimpse of Eloise's calm, victorious smile. Her acting abilities were honestly a little frightening. He wondered if she whipped out those tears and trembling lip to get what she wanted from Klaus. But then, Klaus would probably run naked in public if it was what Eloise wanted from him.
"D-Danke..." Leon said to Sebastian, and showing that appreciation towards this bastard felt like it drained a decent five years off of Leon's lifespan. "Whatever you'd like as payment, it's yours...."
Sebastian smiled kindly once more. "Oh, don't worry about that. I'll have a lovely time with this as well."
"O-Oh...you will?"
"Of course! I'll get to stab you, so that alone will provide a nice afternoon."
Leon bristled, thinking he surely had to be joking. But Eloise smiled encouragingly, as if the promise of being stabbed was somehow absolutely ideal. "Trust him. Everything will be just fine, Leon!" she promised with a confident nod.
Or, maybe she was just acting again.
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