#danelion wishes brought to you

[siswritesyanderes]

Hi! I’m curious: if you had to be the obsession of one yandere from each of your favorite fandoms, who would you choose and why?

Oh, that’s such a good question! I hope I don’t forget any fandoms. (Every time a question like this comes up, I forget all of my interests, lol.) I’m going to go ahead and include a lot of fandoms in this post, regardless of how much I like the thing itself. (I’m clarifying this because you said “favorite fandoms” and these aren’t necessarily my favorites, lol.) Boy, here’s hoping I don’t learn anything about myself, answering this question. Okay, in no particular order:

Harry Potter:

Okay, I’m thinking Newt or Tom Riddle. Newt is really good at caretaking, he’s soft-spoken, and I know from Les Mis that Eddie Redmayne is able to sing (which, in my mind, means Newt can and he’d sing lullabies). Meanwhile, Tom is powerful and, pre-Horcruxes, not too bad-tempered. He’s got followers, which is good for many reasons; he’s not sadistic like Bellatrix; on the whole, he’s a fairly balanced yandere with a surprising number of benefits.

Or Fred and George; they’re prodigies at what they do (They’re pretty much inventors); they’d be self-aware and fun as yanderes; and also they’re canonically kind of ruthless. Yeah, I think I’m settling on Fred and George for this one.

Twilight: 

By the metric of appearance, Seth or Caius. But if I’m taking everything into consideration, maybe Demetri? His power has great yandere potential that would only backfire on me if I’d already escaped, which I probably wouldn’t manage anyway, since I’m a human. He’s high enough in the Volturi that I’d be safe from most everything, but not one of the main three, which is good because I think being Caius or Marcus’s mate would invite a lot of scrutiny from Aro (and he killed Didyme), and being Aro’s might invite sassiness from Caius; just generally, I wouldn’t want to get in on whatever bond they have unless it was a poly thing where they all cared about me. Also, I’d rather avoid Aro’s power if possible, though I suppose having him be yandere for me would be like empirical evidence that even my entire history of thoughts is attractive, which would boost my ego to an absurd degree. You know what, maybe Aro. 

Then there’s also Benjamin, who has a chill personality, awesome power (especially since fire is the thing that kills vampires; being able to control it is like extra immortality on top of the existing immortality), and the innate freedom of not being a part of the Volturi. Yet, if he were to be recruited by the Volturi, you know he’d be as high-ranking as Demetri, if not higher. Again, safety. Demetri, Benjamin, or Aro, on the vampire side. (No Cullens, since they’ve actively provoked the Volturi and I don’t trust their ability to keep me safe. If Cullens were on the table, though, Jasper and Alice.)

Wolf-wise, I feel like Leah would be a really considerate and protective yandere, and since she’s the fastest of the wolves, I think she could get me out of most danger. Maybe Jared, since the only things I know about him are that he has a sense of humor and he can be SUPER manipulative (Like, that “Lee-lee” thing from Breaking Dawn was ruthless.), and that’s a valuable skill in a yandere’s tool belt. But ultimately I guess I would have to choose Jacob, since any of them would be physically unable to disobey him, even under yandere circumstances, so there’s no guarantee they would protect me no matter how much they wanted to. (Also I wouldn’t have to go through the turning process, if I’m with a wolf instead of a vampire.)

Final answer, Aro, Benjamin, or Jacob.

The Hunger Games:

Boy, I would say Snow, because I know he would pull strings for me and give gifts and stuff, but I also feel like he’d be kind of a selfish yandere. Like, he’d be kind when it’s convenient, but he’d ultimately be looking out for his own happiness. I love Finnick, but I feel like yandere traits for him would manifest too selflessly; like, I’d be worried about Finnick, as a yandere. Johanna “There’s no one left I love” Mason would be fiercely protective, but not worryingly selfless. She’d be clingy and spirited and probably beat some people up over me.

Divergent: 

Definitely Peter! He stabbed a guy in the eye in canon! He’s got an intersection of creepy and pragmatic going on, kind of like a human version of Jasper from Twilight, but without the racial baggage. I get that a lot of people thirst after Eric, and Eric definitely has more power than Peter, but his personality doesn’t interest me.

Percy Jackson:

Percy or Leo. Powers and personalities are perfect for yandere. Nico and Will, if they’re bi; I’m not caught up on Trials of Apollo, so I’m not sure.

WAIT, maybe Reyna?? The confidence, the metal dogs...Yeah, Reyna is awesome, too.

Descendants: 

Harry, Uma, and Gil as a unit. Just all three of them at once. They’re pirates, they’re already so steamy and intense about their relationships in canon (or Harry and Uma are, at least), and they’re all very attractive. If I had to choose one, I think Uma. Or Ben, since he’s a really nice guy with a strong moral compass, at least in the first movie (meaning a yandere interpretation of him would most likely become extreme in his morals, rather than corrupt), and he’s the king.

Detroit Become Human:

(I’m literally only making this a category because I find it unbelievable that any yandere Markus is characterized as, like, a rough and dominant yandere.) Markus was a caretaking android for an old man; he would be very loving, understanding, and supportive. His revolutionary energy is not turned against his loved ones. Nothing in canon suggests he would ever be rough with someone he loves. (Connor, meanwhile, is an android cop who is rough with his friends in canon, but lots of fan works characterize him as soft. Puzzling. Maybe uncomfortable, from a racial standpoint, since Markus is a man of color.) 

Also, Ralph is the absolute perfect mix of well-meaning and delusional and intense. Ralph is perfect as a yandere. Why isn’t there more yandere Ralph?? I love Ralph.

And also Jerry, because he’s cheerful and there’s a lot of him. Just a thousand of this one guy, all in love with one person? Yandere gold.

Undertale:

Sans. Or Asgore. Let’s move on. 😅

Legacy of Orïsha:

Roën. Easy. Another pirate, with emotional intelligence and a sense of humor! Self-aware but with a loose moral compass. I love him.

Avatar: The Last Airbender:

Having thought it through, either Jet or Mai; Jet is a charming yet hot-headed rebel, and we’ve already seen what it’s like when he’s like when he takes his ideals to an extreme. He would absolutely flood a town for his loved one, which, now that I’m saying it, shouldn’t be phrased like a desired outcome, but we’re talking yandere here, so it’s fine. 

Mai, meanwhile, would seem dry and casual while also doing the most. She would be satisfied with just sitting in silence, which is chill. And given her wealth, she might ‘gilded cage’ me. Then again, she’s not very forthcoming with praise or positivity in general.

Actually, yeah, just Jet.

MCU:

Listen, I really dislike Wanda in canon, but Wanda and Vision would be the best yanderes. Their powers, Wanda’s tendency to not take responsibility for her actions, there’s a lot there. And, like, she’s generally nice to people she cares about (and Vision is a Mjolnir-lifting sweetheart); she’s pretty much exactly right to be a yandere.

Maybe Nebula, since I want to give Nebula a hug and let her win at tic tac toe or something. She would fire the very biggest guns at anyone who made themself a threat to me, but one-on-one she’s so soft and frank and I love her.

(I want to say M’Baku because Winston Duke seems so lovely, but M’Baku the character seems too strict; we’ve never seen him with a loved one.)

Dandelion: Wishes Brought to You:

Jieun, in his good end, or Jisoo, in his bad end. Look, my friend got me into this game in high school; don’t look at me. Jieun is smart, psychic, very chill, and a king. Jisoo is practically the opposite. Both work very well as yanderes.

[lailoken]

Dandelion (Taraxacum officinale, agg.)

“The idea that the picking of dandelion flowers leads to bed-wetting is widespread and well- known even in urban areas.

When I was a child in Brixton (1950s) we believed that if you picked dan- delion flowers vember 1979] you would wet your bed. [St Albans, Hertfordshire, November 1979]

Dandelions: not to be picked. Very unlucky. Children in Fife (1930s) called them 'pee-the-beds' and anyone who picked them was mocked. [Apples, Switzerland, February 1983]

An Irish lady told me that if you gathered dandelions, and brought them indoors, you would wet your bed that night! [Capel Hendre, Dyfed, September 1983]

Another day, when I was nearly seven years old, I had gathered a bunch of dandelions-this time grandmother told me that I risked wetting the bed if I had anything to do with these. [Bow Street, Dyfed, March 1984]

[I was born in 1949] as a child every other child I knew lived in horror of picking a dandelion-it was widely accepted as a fact this would lead to bed-wetting. [Belfast, February 1991]

This belief has given rise to many local names including: pee-beds [Clappersgate, Cumbria, October 1985], pee-in-bed [Accrington, Lancashire, March 1982], pee-the-bed [Belfast, February 1991], pee- the-beds [Parkstone, Dorset, June 1991], piss-i-beds [Langtoft, Humberside, March 1985], pissimire [Langtoft, Humberside, March 1985], piss-in-the-beds [Dainean, Co. Offaly, January 198 5], pisterbed [Lenamore, Co. Longford, April 1991], pittly beds [Corbridge, Northumberland, January 1993], wet-the-bed [Stockport, Greater Manchester, March 1984], and wet-the-beds [Streatham, London, May 1983]

On the continent of Europe such names as the Dutch pisse-bed and the French pissenlit [Grigson, 1987: 393] reveal that similar names and beliefs are not restricted to the British Isles.

Children also use dandelion 'clocks'—ripe dandelion seedheads—to tell the time, or, more rarely, predict the future.

When dandelions lost their yellow petals and grew that fluffy material, children used to pluck them and by blowing it they imagined they could tell the time. Each blow was counted as an hour, starting at one o'clock. Whenever all the fluffy material was gone, that counted as the time of the day. [Daingean, Co. Offaly, January 1985]

As children in Notts in the 1920s . . . we blew dandelion clocks to tell the time. [Oban, Argyll, October 1990]

We used to blow dandelion seeds and count — 'This year, next year, sometime, never' (to get married). [Llanuwchylln, Gwynedd, April 1991]

Learnt from my mother's knee, so to speak...dandelion seed heads when perfect were used to find out whether someone loved you or not by blowing short breaths at the plant and with each breath reciting 'He loves me, he loves me not,' until all the seeds had blown away and the last blow decided the result! [Worcester, October 1991].

Occasionally the seeds of dandelions are, like autumn leaves, considered to be lucky if caught.

The floating seeds of dandelions and similar plants are called 'fairies' by young children, and it is thought to be lucky to catch one. [South Ken- sington, London, November 1979]

As a child, evacuated to Elgin, Scotland, during World War II... Another 'taboo' plant was the common dandelion, it was supposed to make you wet the bed!... And yet, like all children, we didn't think anything of picking off the seed heads, which was supposed to tell you the time, according to how many tìmes you blew on it to release all the little 'para- chutes', We believed the flying seeds were fairies, and blowing them released them from capture! If you should catch a passing fairy, you would make a wish before releasing it, then let it fly away on the wind. [Stevenage, Hertfordshire, January 1993]

Particularly in Ireland, dandelions were used in the treatment of a wide range of illnesses.

The juice that comes from the danelion [sic] is a cure for every disease. [IFCSS MSS 550: 274, Co. Tipperary]

Dandelion: Boil the leaves and the water in which they are boiled may be drunk. It is said to be a cure for anything. The leaves can also be eaten raw. Mr Sheehan has used it for his stomach. [IFCSS MSS 313: 310a, Co. Cork].

Dandelion tea from the leaves [was] a general tonic. [St Osyth, Essex, February 1989]

Roots of dandelion boiled, and strained, and drunk is good for consumptives. [IFCSS MSS 200: 73, Co. Leitrim]

KIDNEY TROUBLES: the leaf of dandelion is chewed in the mouth and the juice is swallowed. Mrs Griffin told me that this treatment cured Nora O'Callaghan... of the complaint about thirty years ago. [IFCSS MSS 450: 162, Co. Kerry]

Dandelion wine is good for INDIGESTION and kidney troubles. [Portland, Dorset, April 1991]

People used to go out... and gather dandelion. They brought them in and boiled them, the juice of the dandelions were a good cure for weak HEARTS. [IFCSS 589: 205, Co. Clare]

[The dandelion] was a great cure for the JAUNDICE, boil it along with buttermilk and when it is boiled take out the weed and drink the mixture. [IFCSS MSS 717: 217, Co. Meath]

Dandelion Tea: First they put a knife under it and lifted it from the roots. They saved it in the sun until it got quite hard. Then they boiled the kettle and poured the boiling water on it, strained it, and then put it into bottles. Then they drank it, and it was very good for the NERVES. [IFCSS MSS notebooks 442c, Co. Kerry]

Herbal remedies for WARTS: squeeze the white milky juice of the dan- delion onto the wart and allow to dry. Repeat the application as often as possible. The wart will blacken and eventually drop off. [Langtoft, Hum- berside, July 1985]

Dandelion milk was used by my mother to cure WARTS on the fingers. [Histon, Cambridgeshire, January 1989]

Local plant names from an elderly friend in Porthnockie ... bum-pipes — dandelions, which were, like DOCK leaves, used to soothe stings. [Edin- burgh, December 1991]

To cure a sting of a NETTLE: look around and if there is a dandelion beside it you would rub the juice of it to it, it will cure the sting. [IFCSS MSS 50: 295, Co. Galway]

POULTRY-KEEPERS valued dandelions as food for turkeys.

Dandelion is very good for turkeys. It makes them strong and healthy. [IFCSS MSS 500: 238, Co. Limerick]

We used dandelion leaves a lot in feeding young turkeys which were very delicate and hard to rear. The leaves were chopped up and mixed with scrambled or hard-boiled eggs. [Piltown, Co. Tipperary, April 1991]

Rightly or wrongly, children considered dandelion leaves to be ideal food for pet rabbits.

Local plant names from an elderly friend in Porthnockie ... dainties or denties —both flower and leaves of dandelion, the leaves being picked to feed pet rabbits. [Edinburgh, December 1991]

Dandelion flowers are used in the making of a favourite homemade wine.

You should pick dandelion flowers for your dandelion wine on ST GEORGE'S DAY. [Wimbledon, London, November 1983]

In wine-making circles, traditionally, dandelion wine is made on 23 April. [Atkins, 1986: 37]”

—

Oxford Dictionary of Plant-Lore

by Roy Vickery