#damn we are all an awesome bunch aren't we?

[satureja13]

After the Boys ended their tour, they went to Oga's Cantina, to catch a bit of the locals' gossip that could help with their upcoming negotiations about the release of B.D. Plan was to spread out, keep in the background and listen closely to who ever spilled the Bantha Milk... But as soon as they entered the cantina, Hondo yelled: "Look who the nexu dragged in! Conny, the Night Shadow, Val, Jino and Jett and Jet!" The Boys: "???" Hondo: "You’ve got a lot of guts coming here, after what you pulled!"

Kiyoshi: "Val and Jino? Don't say..." Jack: "See? It's not just a silly book! Sai and I will handle this." Said and walked over to Hondo. Sai: "?" Jack whispered to Sai: "Like Kesuke said: Don't worry. Maybe all this here isn't real either. We'll be fine!" Sai hissed: "But what if it is! He also said you're just as sane as he is. And I say, you're just as crazy as he is!" Jack: "Real or not, we gotta play by the rules!"

Hondo interrupted their bickering: "What were you thinking just running off?! You didn't even pay your debts! Damn, Night Shadow - I'd have thought you were smarter than still hanging around with this scum and getting in trouble! Where have you even been?" Jack towards Sai: "Eh, I guess you're the Night Shadow, Sai ^^' " Sai: "Certainly not 'this scum'!" Sai does not understand why this Hondo guy is so upset, but he really doesn't like how the other guests and the barkeeper scrutinized them ö.Ö'

And while Kiyoshi, Jeb, Ji Ho and Vlad sat at a table to discuss who of them Conny, Jett and Jet were...

Jeb: "Night Shadow is a translated part of Sai's elvish name..." Vlad: "This is what you wonder about? Not: How the hell do they know us?" Kiyoshi: "Martha used to call me 'Conny' because she couldn't remember and pronounce 'Kiyoshi'..." Ji Ho: "Maybe Jeb and Jack are 'Jett and Jet' for the same reasons?" Vlad: "..."

... two of the guests huddled... Cora: "Quick, run to the First Order and get them here! Jino is back!" Vanel grabbed the credit chip: "Done!"

Meanwhile Jack Jet or Jett broke the ice with Hondo. No one can be really mad at our cub ^^' He told Hondo about a few of their weird adventures, and they laughed... Sai still thinks there something foul here... This is just too crazy ö.ö' Not only do the people here remember Val and Jino - who look exactly like Vlad and Ji Ho - but also their trusty friends who followed them through the galaxy on their adventures - and who have similar names as them... mostly...

And then Jack told Hondo how Lenny scared them to death when he was hiding in the ventilation shafts... Hondo: "No way! You've met Lenny?" Jack/Jett or Jet: "He's even waiting on our ship! Cat's aren't allowed down here so..." Hondo: "Understandable - after what Lenny pulled here, pal! Do you have pics?" Jack: "Sure!"

Hondo: "Omg look at them! Man, they're iconic here!" Jack/Jett or Jet: "But not as iconic as Val and Jino and their friends, right?" Hondo snorted a laugh: "Why would you be iconic? You're a bunch of trouble makers! Whereas Lenny and his friend are a beacon of friendship and hope for the whole galaxy!"

Jack/Jett or Jet wondered how they still remembered Val and Jino after all those aeons: "But the book..." Jack showed him his treasured copy. Hondo laughed: "They're fan fiction! To be honest, we even thought you wrote them yourself! HahahahaHAAA" Hondo slapped Jack/Jett or Jet on his back and it hurt (Jack's back and his pride...)

Hondo: "But they told us after Lenny and his friend were reunited, they lived happily ever after?" Jack/Jett or Jet: "Not quite. B.D, of ... eh - Lenny's crew got arrested for stealing borrowing that shuttle to help Lenny get to his friend." Jack made sure to mention Lenny very often and to point out B.D's part of the rescue ^^' Hondo: "Awesome! Count us in! FOR LENNY!" Guests: "FOR LENNY!"

The guests chatted excitedly about Lenny - and how awesome and cute he was - when an officer of the First Order entered the cantina, scanned the guests and headed straight towards the Boys' table...

From the Beginning 🔱 Underwater Love 🔱 Latest

Current Chapter: starts ▶️ here Last Chapter: 'Here comes the Sun' from the beginning ▶️ here

📚 Previous Chapters: Chapters: 1-6 ~ 7-12 ~ 13-16 ~ 23-29

[greenerteacups]

Well on the GOT theme now that we're here... you've written before about how the Black family fascinates you. Are there families or houses in the GOT universe that pique your interest and curiosity in that way? What are your head canons about them?

NOW THAT WE'RE HERE... such a tasty question. The for real answer is that I am Starkpilled forever. Ned Stark worst politician of all time they could never make me hate you. Rob Stark you hot dumb bonnie prince charlie clone they could never make me hate you. Catelyn Stark you gorgeous vengeful bitch they could NEVER make me hate you. Jon Arya Sansa Bran and their feral kindergartener baby brother. Theon Greyjoy somehow serving levels of stepbrother never seen before in a family with a literal bastard stepbrother in it. A boring Stark? Never heard of one. All of them are insane deranged crazy intense weirdos who believe that They are the only Normal One in this crazy-ass family. And they all are kind of right but mostly wrong! The Targaryens are the sexy dragonrider house with a million cool names and dynastic squabbles and that would usually be my jam but. BUT. God damn do I love fucking weirdos. God damn do I love some brunette bitches in fur capes.

The more serious answer is that I think the Starks are one of the best families because not only are all of their characters individually developed and rich, but their family as such also has a really clear identity, which in turn informs how each of the members sees themselves. The Starks are often hinted to have a similar magic/spiritual connection to the earth that the Targaryens do, but because it's not as flashy, they aren't recognized as such by anyone. The children's pseudo-psychic bonds with their direwolves are the first kind of creature "magic" that we see in the story, long before Daenerys's dragons or any dragons are introduced, and I think the parallel is intentional. They're one of the oldest dynasties in Westeros. They're far older than any of the Valyrian houses; they've held Winterfell for so long that living memory doesn't even account for the full history of the castle. They built the Wall! They're a family of greenseers and wargs, children with mystical powers of sight and perception! And they're tied into the history of the land. They're mystical and ancient and old and powerful, and their stories all take the shape of myths. Which is such a fucking cool idea for a curse, right? Because like, what if your family curse was that you were destined to be the heroes of the story, every time? No matter what it cost you, what it did to you, what it asked of you? When the world calls, it's you, Stark, against the slings and arrows of fate. And it bequeaths to you the magic gifts that you need to perform that duty, because it is your possession of those gifts that make you the only ones who can. What kind of a tragedy would that be?

The serious and non-textual answer is that the North is to some extent modeled off the Highland clans — that is, a bunch of really proud, distinguished houses that all predate the unification of empire and maintain their distinct identities subsequent to that unification, and live in an ice-cold highland climate with mountains and rivers and lots of mythology and folklore about magical creatures and ghosts that is basically like the highlands and like okay the North is Scotland, okay, if you've never been to Scotland you just need to trust me on this but it's Scotland, it's fantasy Scotland. Which rules. Because Scotland is fucking awesome, firstly. And secondly, I love that Scottish house is the one house that keeps its shit together and hangs on for hundreds of years while all the bitches down south try to kill each other every 50. I love that the North is its own place, and it's still a little wild and mystical and it scares off everyone who's not from it, but the Stark children all know it and love it and so to them that wilderness feels like coming home. That's my pitch for House Stark.

[dr-spectre]

I just watched the Shadow Dark Beginnings animation preview and bro.... where do I even begin?

Now listen, I talk about Splatoon 99% of the time here, but you gotta understand something, Sonic was my first love in gaming. Ever since I played the classic games, Unleashed, Heroes, Rush and Rush Adventure. And watching clips from Adventure 1 and 2. I've always been a humongous fan of this franchise. I grew up in the crowd that watched those "I FEEL LIKE A MONSTER" amvs of Sonic the Werehog for f sake. I had a printed out poster of a render from Sonic and the Black Knight on my wall as a kid because I thought it was the coolest thing ever.

So, seeing this series FINALLY go back to actually telling more serious stories while being sincere about it too... man... it makes me so. Damn. HAPPY!!!! Frontiers wasn't a one time thing, the darker and more serious stories are actually gonna stick around now. I think we're finally free from the 2010s where we were stuck with "BALDY NOSEHAIR! THAT'S THE BEST THING IVE HEARD ALL DAY!" For a literal decade.

Us Sonic fans had to go through the 2010s where the series made fun of itself and was all "comedy" and stopped doing the cool serious shit they used to do... it makes me so happy that they are FINALLY diving into things they haven't talked about in over a decade. They aren't scared anymore to show a fucking human in this god damn franchise because a bunch of gaming journalists who dont give a fuck about the series said "humans in sonic are BAD!" They aren't scared to show Maria and something like Emerl. EMERL?!?! FROM SONIC BATTLE?!?!?! THAT'S SO COOL!!! I BARELY PLAYED BATTLE BUT STILL! THATS AWESOME!

Now.... was some of the stuff in the 2000s going way too far? Like Shadow saying "you're going straight to hell" and murdering Dr Eggman in non canon endings. And a human kissing a dead Hedgehog to bring him back? Yeah that's way too far. DOESNT MEAN YOU SHOULD THROW THE BABY OUT WITH THE BATHWATER!!!! Lost World and Forces man. My God. Ugh.

Anyways, yeah I'm so excited and so hopeful for this franchise again. Before Frontiers came out I was so nervous if the game was gonna be good or not and what you may say about the game itself, it did appeal to tons of people and became the highest selling 3D Sonic game of all time, beating out Heroes. I am now actually fully confident and excited for Frontiers 2 or whatever the next game shall be.

People cheering and crying over the stuff that happens in that game AS WELL AS A PREVIEW FOR A SHADOW ANIMATION makes me so.... HGIWIDIDIS WAHHH IM SO HAPPY!!! IM HAPPY!!! SONIC IS BACK!!! SONIC IS FINALLY BACK!!! SHADOW IS BACK!!! BOW YOUR HEADS LOW ALL HAIL SHADOW!!!!

[imyourbratzdoll]

𝒂 𝒃𝒖𝒏𝒏𝒚 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒆𝒍𝒇 𝒔𝒑𝒆𝒄𝒊𝒂𝒍

🐰easter masterlist🐰

summary - the elves meet the easter bunny, and you plan a special egg hunt for them.

warning - softness, slightly dirty innuendo.

the gif and headers I use aren't mine.

Warnings and Reminders - Please do not plagiarise, copy, repost/republish, adapt, or translate any of my work on any social media platforms, apps, or third-party sites. The only platforms I post my work on are: Tumblr and Wattpad. I do not own any character of any franchise (Marvel etc.) All my works are fiction and may be dark or triggering content: READ ALL WARNINGS BEFORE PROCEEDING.

Lee, Lloyd, Curtis and Ransom weren’t happy, and you couldn’t say the same for the other four elves. You grinned, clapping together and squealing at how adorable they looked in their little bunny costumes. “You guys look so cute! Just hold still!” You hold your cute pink camera up, snapping a few photos of your little elves, their little baskets in their hands waiting to be filled by the eggs you’ve hidden around the place. “Perfect! Now, come on. There’s someone for you to meet before you hunt for the eggs!” You place your basket down for them to crawl inside, and once they have, you pick it up and head out the back. Your cheeks heat up as your eyes land on Logan, whose already looking directly at you with a smirk. Your husband stands next to him with the same look. You walk over with a smile, lifting the basket to show off the elves in their little costumes. 

“Da hell we doing in these stupid costumes for?! I ain’t no damn bunny!” Lee grumbles, tugging on his little bunny ears and the tiny tail connected to his costume. “And where da hell are these damn eggs?!” He looks up and glares, pouting grumpily. You smile down sweetly at him, your hand going down and patting his little head. 

“I’m guessing that’s Lee,” Logan speaks, looking down at the little guy who begins to ready his fist, glaring at the giant man. Logan leans forward and pats his head, laughing as he swings at his hand, causing it to feel ticklish. “So cute.” 

Steve stumbles forward, looking at him with wide eyes and a giant smile. “Hi! I’m Steve! It’s nice to meet you!” He giggles as Logan smiles down at him and pats his head. 

Ransom grumbles, crossing his arms over his chest. Logan’s eyes move over to him, and he raises a brow. “I’m Ransom.” 

Jake waves, “I’m Jake! And I can’t wait to find your eggs!” He bursts into giggles. “I wanna know if they are as juicy as Mrs Claus!” 

Logan smirks. His tongue flicks out as he licks his bottom lip, and his gaze shoots over to you before moving back again. “I don’t think they will, but nothing could compare to her.” Your face heats up as all eyes shoot over to you. 

Lloyd rolls his eyes, “we get it. We’ve all had a go. I’m Lloyd.” 

Curtis nods, “I’m Curtis. Can we get out of these costumes now?” You shake your head, ignoring the groans that fall from most of their mouths. 

Frank bounces forward. “I’m Frank! And I like long walks on the beach.” He giggles before Johnny pushes him out of the way and fixes his little ears.

“I’m Johnny! The hottest out of this bunch.” He ignores the ‘heys’ and smirks. 

Logan nods, “Awesome. It’s nice to meet you all. Now, Y/n asked me to set something up for you guys, and it’s all done.” Ari wraps his arm around your waist, holding you close. “I’ve hidden chocolate eggs all around the place, and all you guys have to do is find them.” The elves perk up at the mention of chocolate. Logan looks at you and smiles as you place the basket down to let the elves out. 

The elves set off and sniffed out the chocolate eggs one by one. Logan steps closer to you as you watch the tiny men wander off. Ari looks over at him and smiles as you lean into them both. You have the cutest little smile as you watch your little elves, causing both the men’s hearts to warm at how adorable you are. The day goes by, the elves find the eggs, and then you all sit around, playing games and decorating things for Easter. When night falls, you all sit around to watch a movie, you between Logan and Ari, curled into their large and warm bodies. The elves were all over your body, snuggled into you, eyes barely able to stay open, and chocolate all over their little faces and hands. You blink, speaking softly. “I love you all.” You break out into a soft, happy smile as you receive ‘love you’s’ back.

thank you for reading!

feedback and reblogs are greatly appreciated.

[paikothecateater]

I know this is a nordic focused blog, but do you have any thoughts on german bros? (mainly from when germany was a little kid and prussia his great big bro)

I sure do! You know, the German bros and the whale bros are pretty damn similar if you think about it. Overconfident clingy older brother, much more reserved easily flustered younger brother.

While, yes, this is a Nordic focused blog, they aren't the only characters I like and what's the harm in trying something new every once in a while.

So here we go!

German brothers headcanon compilation!

-I feel like while Germany is great at taking leadership roles, he's also very socially inept and feels like he may come across as unlikeable, so he avoids most social situations. Prussia is always the one to push him out of his comfort zone. "oh just go, West. It's a small gathering anyway and you'll all be too drunk to care who does what."

-Prussia's whole 'I'm so awesome' shtick is all to mask his severe lack of self worth. He feels so incompetent at everything he does and he feels especially incompetent in comparison to his brother. The fact that Germany often times acts like a better older brother than Prussia is extremely painful for him.

-the sheer amount of burdens Germany tries to carry to keep everything in order is ridiculous. Prussia really worries that Germany will one day completely stop caring about himself for the sake of maintaining this unrealistic role he's given himself. Which is why he'll occasionally cause very unserious problems and ask Germany for help. In the process, Germany is distracted from the stress and instead finally gets him to do something else, like chase a bunch of puppies Prussia just happened to accidentally let loose.

-Germany really worries about Prussia, not only because he fears that Prussia doesn't know what he's doing 99% of the time and is bound to hurt himself, but also because even though he's always the mature one, he can't help but look up to Prussia.

-although Italy would probably send the mafia after me if I said this in front of him, in his own right, Germany is a fantastic cook. Sure, his food may not be for everyone, but there's no denying that if you left him alone in a kitchen, you can expect a meal to come out of there. Prussia absolutely loves Germany's cooking, but he also thinks it's very funny that Germany is that good.

Alright, that's a few. Thank you so much for the ask and let me know if you guys would like a separate blog for general hetalia headcanons.

[panlight]

can I be anon? what was the point of all the other vampires in Breaking Dawn? how many witnesses did they really need?!?! and most of them didn't do or say anything?!

My hunch is that this is another legacy of Forever Dawn, which, remember, was originally just a bunch of epilogues strung together after she finished Twilight because she wasn't ready to give the characters up. So I could easily imagine as she's writing this just for fun and just for herself she's making up a bunch of new vampires just for the pure fun of it. Do Mary and Randall do or say a damn thing? No. Do these 3-4 person covens make a lot of sense when there's a whole speech about how only vegetarian vampires can really form family bonds? Nope. But it's just Fun! It's new characters with cool powers and she's just playing around and often face-planting into ethnic stereotypes as she does so.

Then the publishers are like "ehhhh we don't want marriage and a baby we're marketing this as YA" and they want three books only. So she goes and writes New Moon and Eclipse and doesn't bring up ANY of these characters she already has in her head because for awhile Eclipse is supposed to be the end. No baby, no confrontation, so no need for witnesses. Then the books make a bazillion dollars so when she asks if she can do her fourth book and write the ending she wanted all along the publishers stop counting their money just long enough to say, "sure, knock yourself out."

So she re-works Forever Dawn and all these random characters we've never heard of in the previous books suddenly show up in the last third or so of the last book. There's no time to get to know them, no time to develop them. The only ones we've heard of before are the Denali coven (most of whom we meet earlier at the wedding, and then Kate and Eleazar become more prominent than Tanya) and Peter and Charlotte (who may as well not even be there for how little they matter in the confrontation, and who aren't further developed at all). The rest just come out of nowhere, stand around a bit, perform some cool magic tricks, praise Bella for being awesome and leave. And a lot of them come with partners and families because that's important to SM. So you end up with this bloated cast of new vampires, most of whom hardly speak and I think it's all just a hold over from her just-for-fun epilogues and again, she couldn't kill her darlings, she had to include all of these people even though there wasn't room or time for them. And by that point no one cares to improve it because this series is making them oodles of money so it doesn't really matter she's introducing like 20 new characters in the last chapters of the last book.

[saltprince]

I still genuinely believe that playing Granblue for love is the most enjoyable way to play it, as in, I got into the game because of specific characters and then fell in love with more of the world

But I also have to believe there's an incredible sense of vindication in loving a character who's also just objectively good in the meta? Like, you love them and they're good and you can use them to beat difficult enemies, you can fight "with" them in a sense

Like, I'm happy when someone in the hivemind mentions building a party out of blorbos and it working well. I love that and I'm happy to hear it. There's soul and heart in it and not just grinding for the sake of grinding

Then again, I'm a pretty low level player and I know I'm not built for the HL stuff

I think everyone has their own reasons to play gbf or any game, but it's easy to lose sight of the fact different types of players exist (and the (mutual) contempt or even gatekeeping that often follows in its wake).

Personally I do need a strong incentive to pick up a game. I was on and off gbf for years until Sandalphon hooked me fully-- but I had my eye on a bunch of other characters even before him, I just needed a push.

So perhaps shockingly I am also into gbf because I love the characters, I just swing back and forth a lot between objectives.

At the end of the day it's about how you have fun. Progression isn't linear nor is it required.

I kind of ended up writing way too much in response so I'll put it under a read more.........

So like, as someone who's fairly high up in the content and does things both for meta and faves?

The thing with meta is that for most of all characters, it shifts over time. Characters fall in and out of meta or may get new alts that are or aren't meta. Even characters everyone thinks of as top tier have places where they aren't that great. Don't get me wrong, it's definitely awesome when your fave is meta-- but designing teams around your fave to make them perform alongside or in spite of meta is vindicating too. I really think any character can perform in general content.

Generally meta isn't the damning end-all it may seem, far from it. I think meta only has chokehold on 2 things. Racing (getting the most points, either for events like Unite & Fight or something like racing for points for chests in raids) and whatever the 'true' endgame content is at the time. But even for those, there are always options, and as time goes on we get more resources to work with, making teams more flexible.

That said, I do enjoy figuring out teams for specific fights like they're puzzle pieces. I get more enjoyment when I fit my favorites in there, but initially the reward is in figuring out a team to begin with. I'm a bit in between faves and meta, though lately I've been leaning much more into my faves. I find that I'm okay with running 1 fave on a team if the meta makes it possible for me to run that character, and then I'll gradually slot in more faves when I can. But that's me. My whole wind team frontline for endgame is faves, and arguably only 1 of those, Seofon, is true meta for some of that content. (Yes I do love Kaguya for her design). Outside of that frontliner team, I'm able to run even more faves!

I also enjoy building teams to make the lives of my friends easier, I can either run raids for them or help them figure out teams, often including their faves when I can. I'd go as far as to say that most of the game can easily be played with your favorites, with more and more restrictions starting to apply the higher you go in terms of difficulty. And that's okay. You don't have to play those. Or you might eventually play those and figure that yeah, if it's just for this fight, the team doesn't matter that much when it helps you get things to invest into your faves. It might even let you discover a new favorite if you experiment.

It's good to know the type of player you are and play the way that works for you. Like me, this can also change over time or depending on your mood. There's no reason to bother with HL content or break your head over things that aren't fun. If you enjoy logging in and playing your Omega raids with your faves and signing back out, great. If you find yourself wanting to take on Bahamut with your faves, also great. Hell, if you sign in just to look at your home screen character, sigh lovingly, and go to sleep, also also great.

gbf does get pretty grindy if you let it, but it can be spaced out or made easier, too. Personally I let my game run on full auto 95% of the time, designing teams around this in order to make my faves stronger and content easier as I go. If you struggle to come up with your own teams, store-bought (youtube,wiki,guides) is fine.

I'll admit my own main problem is time, I struggle to keep up with the world I fell in love with and may not have the time or patience for that for a while. So I really enjoy seeing the activity on Icha's blog for that reason and staying in the loop through that.

At the end of the day it's about how you have fun. Progression isn't linear nor is it required.

[popculturebuffet]

Monthly Muppets Madness: The Land of Gorch (Comissioned by WeirdKev27)

It's Monthly Muppet Madness with our special review topic, The Land of Gorch, yayyyyyyy! Courtsey of viewers like you and WeirdKev27.

I give Kev full credit for the idea of this one: after my previous looks at the muppets earliest days, Kev was curious about this odd chapter in their history and having wanted to watch these shorts at some point anyway, I was more than happy to oblige.

For those less familiar, the Land of Gorch was a recurring sketch on Saturday Night LIve during it's first season, just before the Muppet Show's own first season. Yes folks the muppets were live from new york every saturday night for most of it's first season but a combination of the muppet show finally taking off and the writers actively resenting the Land of Gorch's very existance sunk it. So what was this weird experiment and how did it become a milestone in muppet history but a footnote in snls? Join me under the cut to find out!

From the Bubbling Tarpits to the Sulfurous Wasteland…

Henson came to SNL from a place of desperation. What jim had feared from doing Seasame Street was coming true as most in hollywood had no intrest in a show for kids AND adults from the muppets and wrote him off as "kids stuff"

Thankfully Jim had backup from Bernie Brillstien, his agent who looked for more adult venues.. and Bernie just happened to also be the agent for one Lorne MIcheals , as well as Chevy Chase, John Belushi and Gilda Radner, and loving the idea of performing to an adult audience and the chance to shake the Seasame Stigma, Henson jumped to it, getting Frank Oz and Micheal K Frith's help crafting the characters. And Lorne Micheals genuinely loved the idea and was convinced it'd be a massive hit, as he should be: the set design was marvelous, creating a horrifying otherworldly swamp and the muppets were awesomely detailed.

So with all that going for it, what went wrong? Why aren't we seeing a land of Gorch Series on peacock or convention halls filled iwth gorchheads? Simple: the writing. See Jim wasn't ALLOWED to actually write the sketches, as WGA rules meant the SNL staff had to. And their response?

The SNL staff were in clinical terms, snotty little dicks about having to write for the muppets, drawing straws for the job and with Writer MIcheal O'Donahuge being paticuarly childish saying "I don't write for felt" and calling them "Mucking fuppets" and "hairy facecloths" in an interview. Or to sum it up in a line

It was that 'i'm an adult" sensiblity that was at the heart of the conflict: you had in one corner a bunch of 20 year olds who, having read the book Live From New York it's Saturday Night, I can confirm were powered by cocaine to get through the crazy deadlines (somethign that thankfully stopped after the tragedy of JOhn Belushi), and were likely focused on trying to be the most clever and a bunch of more settled middle aged men (jim had FIVE kids by then. Holy shit), who knew what they wanted but couldn't actually execute it. It likely didn't help Jim was exact about what scripts he wanted and thus struggled to find a writer who actually gave a damn. Neither side was bad at what they did, iv'e seen a few early snl sketches, it's not bad stuff and the muppets speak for themselves.. it's just they didn't mesh creatively AT ALL. You can't make good work forcing someone to do something they don't want to do. It's why while i'll review just about anything on comission I will talk to my clients if I feel I just can't give a good review of something. I'd rather change gears and see what else they want than push something out i'm not proud of and I suspect the throw it at the wall and see what sticks nature of SNL, a part of it tha'ts essential, just didn't mesh with the well prepared and throughly thought out muppets. The Land of Gorch only lasted for season 1, with a combo of these issues and Jim FINALLY getting the Muppet Show Greenlit ending it, though they returned for one sketch in season 2 to see the characters off. Despite not really ever taking off though and the Gorch muppets only showing up in cameos after this, it ended up being an important piece of muppet history: Henson may not have made many friends in the writers room, but he made plenty of show biz contacts with at least 7 muppet show guest stars having also appeared during the time LOG was on SNL. He also realized he liked creating a weird fantasy world without humans around, and took the grungy creative part of LOG to create the Dark Crystal.

So now we've seen the messy road to it's creation let's see the messy results!

Episode Guide!

Nothing But Flowers

There aren't any offical titles for these sketches, so i'm just making up my own. You've been warned. If your curious you can find all but one on THIS FACEBOOK PAGE. You can also find them if you have peacock but given i'm on the tier with ads, it was just easier to use the facebook apart from the one episode they didn't have. I"ll mention it when we get here.

So the first episode is….

It introduces most of the cast: King Ploobis (Jim himself), the tyranical ruler of the land and selfish bastard, his nagging wife Queen Peuta (Alice Tweedle), his creepy assitant/viser/wife fucker Scred (Jerry Nelson), his mistress Vazh (Ronda Handsome here, Fran Brill after0 and the Mighty Favog, their god they go to once an episode for advice (Frank Oz). It's easily the slowest paced muppet production i've seen, mostly just stopping to introduce someone else then moving on. It only really gets funny once we get to the Mighty Favog. Oz does a terrific job as usual and the puppet for favog is weirdly expressive despite it's size and the fozzy voice fits a huckster god really well, helped by it sounding just deep enough from fozzy. I just love the concept of him: a god who really offers no helpful advice but will gladly take your money now, with the great catchphrases of "talk to me" and "it'll cost ya". He feels like the only character to actually have a personality, as well as fit BOTH crews style well.

It's the Money or Stop

The kingdom is broke and our heroes need money. Ploobis sells Scred to Favog by shoving him down his hole. I"m not doing the phrasing or goodnight everybody gags here on the grounds that they knew exactly what they were doing. i'm 95% sure scred was into it.

Sunshine Supermuppet

We meet Wiss, Ploobis stoner son played by Richard Hunt. He's high.

So is Favog. That's also the joke. NEXT

Eat It

This one's a bit funnier as Ploobis has eaten his faviorite food to extnction. It's ideas like this I feel got later filtered into the concept for Dinosaurs, another one on my to do list. Maybe later this year. But the idea works well enough as does the solution: Favog asks for a Glig as his payment and then give sit back when he's told the actual problem.

Out of My Headache

Ploobis has a headache. If your wondreing why these are so short it's that most of the cast is REALLY thin. Favog is your standard asshole, Peuta is his nagging wife, Vazh fanservice etc. While Scred isn't much deeper, Nelson really gives the little shit a lot of character and Ploobis annoyance with him and frequent homer simpson esque stranglings are a delight. But otherwise there just isn't a lot to latch onto in these early sketches, which likely didn't help either sides agrivation.

I Got You Babe

This one feels like night and day from the others non favog scenes as it has an interesting premise: Scred has a crush on lily tomlin and has gone to see her: Ploobis and Peuta going thorugh his stuff is fun, and we get a nice rendition of I got you babe from the two. Weirdly Tomlin never did Muppet Show, though she did do seasame street a few times, but she's great at this. She still is: Just look at Grace and Frankie. She's a fucking national treasure. It's also a sign things DO get better.

Everybody's Drunk

This one is fun even if it's VERY low effort: basically Ploobis gets very drunk, forces Scred to get very junk and they go to the Mighty Favog absolutely shitfaced. That's the episode. But unlike the others where I didn't have a lot to say the performances of the two are so hilarious and the sight of a muppet absolutely blotto so rare it carries the episode. It helps this is one of the shorter ones so the thin premise dosen't outstay it's welcome: it's just pure fun.

Christmas Time (Do Let the Bells End)

Another highlight of the series, as King Ploobis throws a Christmas party no one goes to as everyone's at the Killer Bee's party. Fun Fact: I've never seen Killer Bee's sketch. So there's that. It's fun enough especially with the sketch ending with Skred and guest Candice Bergen ditching the party for the Bee's party. It helps these sketches start to zero in more on what worked, i.e. the main duo of ploobis and skred, and their simple but effective act of Ploobis doing the setups, Skred saying something funny, and ploobis threatening to murder him for it.

Sex Lawz

So as set up in a previous episode, Skred is having an affair with the queen who after a few decades of this has decided to have Skred come clean before they get dirty again. Ploobis being who he is is a hypocrite and plans to murder anyone who sleeps with his wife, while Peuta is laso a hypocrite as she's mad her husband's cheating on her while she's doing the same. What i'ms aying is Skred is the most likeable person in the cast next to Favog, who advises Skred to exercise self love.. preferably with some magazines. THere's also a nice joy of sex runner.

Buy Me Toys Skred buys Peuta a sex toy. He struggles to put it together. The episode mercifully ends after it blows up. You know with what Jim can do with his imagination I expected WAY more and way weirder from a muppet sex toy. When I heard the premise of this one I was excited.. which says a lot about me I haven't fully processed, but this one's fully on Jim and Co for not making a better prop.

Honey Queen

A shorter sketcha nd the beginging of the end. For this last batch, the bits get experimental and thankfully get to a place where BOTH creative teams thrive: backstage shenangians. You can see a lot of the muppet show wraparoudns in these bits as the land of gorch muppets, mostly skred, try to get back on the sohw. In this case, Skred shows up as a bee to be in a sketch, only for Gilda Radner to tell him it was canceled. Gilda plays off him VERY well and it's no shock she went on to be on the muppet show. She's great at playing off them. It's also clear alongside Favog Skred was the breakout, and thus gets the most to do in this last stretch. It likely helps his puppet was easier to work in.

Look What I Did To My Id

This one is just .. bad. It's chevy chase dicking around with his hands because ostensibly our heroes are at the grammys. It's clear he didn't really respect what they did. The IDEA isn't bad, having an episode done just with hands, but instead of having Chevy act out a sketch or a parody, he just.. renacts a porn about the milkman because he and the writers coudln't be assed ot come up with actual jokes.

Eeee Eeee Eee Eeeeee DUN DUN DUN DUN dooo.. do do.. do do..

Is this question me and my dad, or Skred and Anthony Perkins? The World will never know

Anthony Perkins, aka Norman Bates, shows up and he's REALLY good. I had no idea he was this funny. He also wrote a murder mystery film, the last of shiela based on parties he threw. Yes really. YOur life is better for knowing that. And this sketch is one of the best, if not my faviorite as the muppets beg for work, with Anthony understandably annoyed as he dosen't actually run the show so he can't help. Skred also cratshes the ensuing sketch, with a great entrance. Easily the highlight.

Don't Start Now

Raquel Welch rebuffs Skred and Plobis hitting on her because there's nothing bellow the waste, possibly the first muppet dick joke and certainly not the last. I also got paid good money to type "muppet dick joke"

Chevy shoes them away then tells Raquel to take her shirt off.

Can't Buy Me Love

Another high point. It's clear these show biz bits just fit better. Favog claims to know the beetles and tries to bullshit our heroes way back onto the show. Not much else to sya, which is a habit here: the sketches can be funny but there just.. isn't a lot to disect. The good oens are just fast paced comedy and the not so good ones are just

Don't Leave Me This Way The ending sketch is my second favioroite and a good exit. The Land of Gorch Crew finds themselves in storage, beomaning how their jobless and how the muppet show has started without them. Lily Tomlin TRIES to find them work, but it's ultaimtely fruitless. IT's kind of a sad ending, but the fun of seeing them LITERALLY ins torage and coming out of cabinets (inclduing Ploobis shoving his way out despite his wife's discomfort given she's just bellow him), and the fact most of them aren't tha tlikeable help. And the muppets all TRYING to whistle is just.. comedy gold. It's clear Jim likely wrote this one or at least got to help more since he was on his way out.

So that was the land of gorch. and it's just kinda there. It has cool loooking muppets, but the clash between both creative teams and the lack of direction leave us with a series of shorts that's mostly filler and then Favog shows up. The last few are pretty damn great and really feel like they came right out of the muppet show, so it's clear Jim was getting his groove.. but it just wasn't built to last. SNL's side bits are better when they have a creative force behind it like Mr. Bill being indy films (with the writer being hired later), or the lovely chaos I need to explore at some point of saturday tv funhouse. and later groups like The Lonely Island and Please Do Not Destroy being built in house, still creatively experimenting, but in a way that fit sthe style of the show more. As it stands the Land of Gorch is just a weird evolutionarly step for the muppets that didn't quite land. Like the wartortle to Muppet Show and Dark Crystla's Blastoise: kinda there but not really.

Next Month: For the first time since I started this BRAND. NEW. MUPPETS. CONTENT. It's Muppets Mayhem baby! Need I say more?

[kitchfit]

Year in Review: Books Pt 1

Tumblr deleted the entire first draft of this, which is cool and awesome. It was too long anyways. These aren't meant to be full on analytic reviews, just blurbs about my experience with the books and what I thought about them. I might move into more in depth stuff later on next year.

Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen

He was pride. She was prejudice. Can I make it anymore obvious?

I started this on CD audiobook for the first half before driving my car off of a cliff. I was fine, but Elizabeth Bennet was a casualty of the accident, so I found the rest of the book on Libby with a different reader who had Very different vibes. It kind of fit how I felt about the book. Jane Austen is very good at regaling the audience from Elizabeth's point of view about how Darcy is the shittiest man alive, while turning at the halfway point to reveal he is actually the Only Good Victorian Man to exist.

I've seen this tale play out in both BBC and Keira Knightley formats, which are both fantastic in their own right, but I was significantly more invested in the characters this time around, especially the supporting cast. Elizabeth/Darcy romance was very cute, Jane and Bingley was adorable, Elizabeth's shitty cousin was hilarious. I like the glimpses of how she thinks about the rest of her family that you don't get in the movie. She hates how her dad views her mother as entertainment, she hates how her mother treats her children like products to be sold, she hates how her younger sisters make them all look silly. Damn she's really hateful, huh? Almost like she's preju-OHHHHHHHH.

Coraline by Neil Gaiman

The Funny Cat, The Spider Mom, and the Weird Door

This was a book I was excited to get into. The movie freaked me out when I was little, as did it everyone else, and I'll get to that since I watched it immediately after this. Maybe this Friday. But it isn't anywhere near as vividly horrific as the OG Evil Narnia. In a fun way. There's an implication in this book that the Other World and Other Mother are just two of many possible little horrors that live under your bed or behind the door that shouldn't be there that want to hurt and/or eat you. Kind of like real life. That's okay though, you can get through it alive. And Coraline proves it.

I like her a lot as a character. She isn't near as naive as she is in the movie, and catches on to the nature of what's happening on the end of night one, thus Other Mother kidnapping her parents to serve as motivation to come back. That gives the book freedom to explore the Other World and its nature thoroughly, and watch as it all crumbles around Coraline. I like that everything is just a bunch of bugs stretched into the visage of pleasant things by a giant spider. I also love that spider's contrary motivation. She needs to feed, but there is also a genuine desire to love Coraline, to be a mother, whatever her bizarre conception of what that means. Evil hungry desire is more pressing though. Get in my web, girl.

The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe by C. S. Lewis

Digimon season one for 1950s British kids.

At some point I decided to reread all of the Narnia books. I got through like, 4 of them in a weird order due to how Libby works. I promise I do read physical stuff its just hard to find the time to finish them. The first book the Narnia line up was originally written for my boy Clive's real life goddaughter Lucy Barfield , who was temporarily displaced as a child during WWII, as a children's story. He even dedicated the book and maybe the whole series to her. However, by the time he finished this one she was already an adult and "too old for fairytales." Classic blunder. I'll still read your stuff, Clive.

The whole of Narnia is a wintery wonderland turned on its head, its magic and majesty suffocating under a thick sheet of ice. Jadis is a very cool antagonist. She's not super complex, but she's a very strong character and extremely threatening villain, as we see throughout the series. The Pevinsies all have a sweet relationship. Edmond's an asshole in a very realistic sense, but they all care deeply for each other in an even more realistic way. The end of the book starts a pattern Mr. Lewis likes to repeat where a quick epilogue is hamfisted into the end that blows over large swaths of time in a hurry to resolve everything. I have problem's with that in later books, but it works best here, skipping to the famous reveal that time moves much faster in Narnia, and two decades or so only equals a few minutes in our world. A little fucked up. Go through puberty again, Pevinsies, this time in BRITISH SCHOOL.

Prince Caspian by Clive

Ocarina of Time for 1950s British kids.

The second book in the series gives more context to the world Narnia lives in, while also screwing with our perception of what Narnia is in first place. A previously unmentioned country to the east invades and colonizes Narnia, oppressing its people and removing magic wherever they can. Lewis can write about the complexities of colonization as he actually comes from a country familiar with this kind of shit, believe it or not. Who are they conquered by? A country of Minotaurs? Dragons? Wayward dwarves still allegiant to Jadis? Humans??? What the hell?

Turns out Narnia is the weird magic fairytale place even within its own universe. Everywhere else is inhabited by eternally 18th century European style society. It's also 1000 years later, but a year for our dudes, so the Pevinsies get to experience how Narnia has changed physically in all that time. Like Cair Paravel, that place two whole pages mention in the first book. I like that the age reversal thing is acknowledged in this book, and how that might have affected our heroes and their development. At the end of the book, the colonizing force gets sent to Earth, and Prince Caspian is crowned as King Caspian. Aslan (or maybe one of animals, idr) says outright that Narnia is better ruled by humans than its own people. Which is. An odd note to end on a book whose main conflict is colonization. Huh.

A Horse and His Boy by C. Staples L.

He was a horse. He was his boy. Can I make it anymore-okay shut up.

This is an interesting one. Five books into the Narnia series and we are introduced to brand new protagonist, with zero connections to previous characters, in a place that is not Narnia. He's a young boy who runs away with a talking horse in their desperate attempt to both escape slavery. They meet a spunky, ass-kicking princess who's also running away, this time from an arranged marriage. Narnia in this story is more of an ideal their working towards, rather than a physical place the story spends time in. The plot is very refreshing in this aspect, especially if its the fifth, or in my case, third Narnia book you've read in a row. It could likely stand on its own outside the rest of the series, though you do get a surprise cameo from the adult Pevinsies pre-wardrobe-return, which is fun.

I do have a couple issues with it though. I'd argue against the idea that all of Narnia is a direct analogue to Christianity. Aslan is definitely furry Jesus, and C. S.'s theological beliefs are an obvious intentional aspect of the storytelling, but most of the books have themes and lessons outside of that and pose a genuinely fun fantasy world to engage with. The religious metaphors in this book specifically are pretty heavy-handed though, and not very delicately woven in. The setting of the story also pulls allusions to several real-life Middle Eastern cultures, and if you think a white British dude in the 50s wrote about that respectfully? Sorry no. There's also a lot of mention of Boy (I straight up forgot that kids name) being Special and Different for having pale skin and blue eyes. :/. At the end is another rapid-fire epilogue that blazes through Boy's life as the new prince of wherever that I think the story could have gone without. Just let it end with dignified mystery, Clive.

The Magician's Nephew by Siwel S. C.

Honestly Clive the mulitverse trope has been done to death, bro

Last Narnia book on the list as of now. Luckily, its also the best one. This is a prequel to the whole of the Narnia continuity, which details the creation of Narnia and the origins of Jadis, but the actual plot revolves around two new Brit kids Digory and Polly. Digory is described as grubby at least sixteen times throughout the story. His mom is sick and his magic uncle sucks ass and he's scared and he has no friends. Polly decides to be that friend which ultimately burns her as he's also a bit of a selfish brat. Learning to get past that brattiness and mature enables Polly to forgive him and ultimately helps him save his mother.

The plot takes place in the Wood Between Worlds, which has still stuck in my head and spurned on my imagination years later. You move outside of Earth to find the grandness of the Milky Way, you escape the Milky Way to discover the imperceivable majesty of the universe, and you find the indeterminate edge of that universe and land yourself in an idyllic forest with trees so high you cannot see the sky, the forest's floor dotted with puddles leading to other worlds. Jadis' origin is also pretty fascinating. A queen so obsessed with ultimate power she destroyed her own empire rather than let her sister take it. Aslan roars the world into existence. The whole vibes on this book are pretty stellar, ngl.

The Bell Jar by Silvia Plath

You wouldn't be cool if it weren't for the lessons that you learnt in the BELL JAR, nah, nana nah nah.

And now for a weird fucking heel turn. And also the last book I'm doing for now. I'm going to be honest, my original interest in this book came from the song "I Cut Myself" by Talkshow Boy, who mentions the book in the above lyric. Also, my college roommate said she liked it a lot. I went in with zero expectations and was surprised at how hard it hit home. I've never been personally institutionalized, but I know people who have, and I can relate to the downward depression spiral Esther goes through in this book.

Its interesting to see the thought patterns and paradigms that Esther voices in her inner monologues that partially lead to her mental break. Little observations that reveal her hyper-awareness and implicit nihilism. They're good observations too. The vivid description of the horrific image of a woman giving birth compared to a dulled animal being hooked into a machine. You can see her perspective on a lot of subjects, probably even agree with much of it. It makes sense, as this is the author famous for vivid and introspective poetry more than anything. Looking at the historical context for this book made me sad, especially given how hopeful the ending was, at least how I read it.

Going to shift into movies at the end of the week. I'll need to start doing these at least bi-weekly if I want to finish before the end of the year. Also more bisexually.

[serpiaxerma]

I'm so close to my limit on this fucking card game.

Greetings fellow duelists.

Picture this, okay. You're a Branded player. Hateful, I know. You want to play paper, build the deck in real life, test it out with other people. Great. Awesome. Fun for you!

You play some Master Duel, get a feel for the deck. Alright, yeah, feels good, feels powerful. Bit bricky, but who cares? Isn't every deck? (Coping.)

Grab a couple of Albaz Strike Structure Decks. $60 total, wow! Fit together something resembling your build, if a bit on the cheap side, but that's fine. You're just testing it out.

Boom! Wake up babe, new support just dropped. Time to upgrade! A trap like Branded Banishment, a clean $10, alright. Another Ecclesia retrain in Cartesia, a monster and a fusion spell? Sick, sign me up! So, how much we talking? $20? $30?

$60.

Oh. Alright, we'll just skip her for now then. No need to cash out so much for a one-of that only boosts consistency. What else is there?

Right, yeah, the Bystial monsters! A bunch of big asshole dragons who are also handtrap chaos monsters? Damn, pretty strong! Got some nice new continuous spells and traps like Regained and Beast for $5 each, yeah, sure.

The monsters aren't too terrible. Saronir for $5, Druiswurm for $10, Magnamhut for $20. Pricey, sure, but if it changes and evolves the playstyle so much. Oh, and Lubellion! So again, like $30, right? Or is this another $60 Cartesia situation?

$120.

Okay no. If we can't have all these nice pretty new Branded cards for under $300 when I'm only planning to mess around, I'm good, I'll pass.

Luckily, the tins are coming out later this year, so I'm sure the reprints will be a lot cheaper. And prettier, too. Then I can finally upgrade my deck and play like I've practiced in-game! Just one more month, right?

DING DONG!

Oh? Who's that?

IT CHANGED.

Hmm? What did?

THE WHOLE DECK. IT'S COMPLETELY DIFFERENT. NO MORE DESPIA. NO MORE BYSTIALS. NO MORE BRANDED SPELLS AND TRAPS.

... But I liked Branded Beast control. I liked Masquerade + Dramaturge pass. I loved bringing back Mirrorjade with Ad Libitum. I loved banishing my opponent's monsters with Magnumhut to +2. What happened? Where're my children? Where are we? Who are you?

WELCOME TO DUEL MONSTERS BITCH, IT'S TIME FOR CHIMERA BRANDED, FORGET ABOUT THE TINS.

E M B R A C E N O S T A L G I A

[whatyourusherthinks]

Red One Review

I was kinda surprised we never got a trailer for this movie. I feel like I saw marketing for it everywhere except in the theater, although we had the poster for a very long time. All I knew was JK Simmons was playing Santa, awesome. It was starring the Rock and Chris Evans, cool. And the plot was something like a CIA guy teaming up with a criminal to save Santa from being kidnapped. That sounds like a lot of fun! But then... Then reviews came out. And they were bad. I didn't see anything specific, but it had a 34% on Rotten Tomatoes and a 36% on Metacritic! THAT'S HALF AS MUCH AS TERRIFIER 3 WHAT THE HELL.

What Is The Movie About?

Santa Claus get's kidnapped, so his head of security Cal must team up with criminal Jack to go find him.

What I Like.

This movie was super cool! First, you should all know I love main characters who are criminals so I really liked Jack. I loved his arc with is kid and the darkest hour where he admits that he been a bad father made me cry. Cal is a cool character too, I like that he's disillusioned with the Christmas Spirit yet still the one who hardcore "We have to save Christmas!". His character arc about regaining his belief in the good in people and goddamn it I love stories like that. The acting is, of course, really good, but it's a stacked cast so I expect nothing less. I might have already mentioned it before but I like that Chris Evans is playing against the Captain America type now. JK Simmons is such a effortlessly cool Santa, it was really interest take on the Saint. I like the way he moves when he's doing his job. Everything is fluid and done with purpose. The action in general a lot of fun and really creative! There's a chase scene with the Rock sliding down a bunch of tubes to chase giant Snow Cat and then he jumps on a snowmobile and causes an avalanche and then RIDES DOWN A MOUNTAIN IN FRONT OF THE AVALANCHE HE CREATED. A magical ice cream truck comes out of the ocean and then 3 giant snow golems come out of the back and attack Cal and Jack and they had to pull of their carrot noses to defeat them. The effects are really damn cool! It reminded me of the D&D movie from last year, with a ton of magical creatures with really cool designs. There was a couple cameos that I won't spoil but they looks SO FREAKING COOL. The plot is pretty good, there was a nice twist at the climax, and I like that the movies ends with showing the audience how this version of Santa does his run. I love movies that take the Santa Claus mythos seriously, and this Red One adds a lot of creativity to the mythology. I like the ray that Cal has that allows him to shift the reality of toys, basically being able to turn a Hot Wheels into a real car. All toy stores being connected allowing North Pole workers to travels around the world is interesting as well. They could've played a little bit more Christmas carols, but the ones they did use where pretty good.

What I Don't Like.

The dialogue is pretty meh. The exposition is fine, and when the movie slows down for an emotional moment it's pretty good. But the quips and one liners suck. They aren't egregious or anything, but they are incredibly cliched and sometimes don't always make sense. I also wish the movie paid off everything they set up. There's a part where Cal goes into a toy store and grabs a bunch of toys as supplies, and only half of them get used! Which are some of the coolest scenes in the movie as well! I WANTED TO SEE HOW THE MONOPOLY SET WAS GONNA PLAY INTO THIS!

Final Summation.

What is everyone else's problem?! Red One is FUCKING AMAZING! It's a ton of fun, with very creative action, and cool visuals. I think this is a great holiday movie, and you should check it out when you feel in the spirit!

It is interesting isn't it? How straight action movies kinda seem to getting a bad rap this year? The last movie that made me feel this excited during the showing and hyped to watch the movie again was Killer's Game, which also got terrible reviews! Even The Fall Guy, as perfect of a movie as that was, it only got okay reviews. Is there some sort of stigma against action movies I wasn't aware of? I don't even know the angle this could take. Even if you SOMEHOW get bored of the action, all three of those movies that have really good characters and pretty good plots! But I guess if the main character was an annoying fucking blood rag and the plot is nothing but an excuse to show off cameos than it's a masterpiece. (Not mentioning any Deadpool & Wolverines I mean names I mean Deadpool & Wolverine is overrated.) I get the middle of the year has not been good, but that doesn't mean the action movie that comes out is bad. Besides if the problem is action being boring then why the fuck is Terrifier 3 so highly regarded?

Seriously. How the fuck does Terrifier 3 have twice the Metacritic and Rotten Tomatoes score as this movie?

[lilibeams]

Nathan Prescott x oc - a bodyswap crackfic - Life is Strange

'Nathan, I know you're in there. Stop ignoring me.' Victoria kept banging on the door.

I stumbled around, squinting, as I tried to figure out what the fuck was happening. I tripped into the doorframe before opening the door a crack. 'I'm not ignoring you, Victoria. I'm busy doing shit and now's not the time. Talk later byeee.'

Slamming the door shut, I locked it.

'Oh what the hell? Why do I sound like that?' I squinted, trying to determine whose room I was in (it definitely wasn't mine).

I paused. 'Wait a fucking minute. Did Victoria call me Nathan?'

~

Spotting Nathan—in my body—round the corner as he left the girls' dormitory, I snatched his—my—wrist and flung him into the wall. I towered over him. Was Nathan strong, or was I just really light?

'What the fuck! You. What did you do, Parker?'

'What makes you think I did this?'

'You're always sticking your nose where it doesn't belong and getting into trouble—'

'That's rich coming from you, buddy.'

'Why wouldn't I think that? It's fucking true.'

'Oh, well for starters, I didn't toilet paper your car or, I don't know, dye your hair neon pink in your sleep (though this might be my best chance); this is entirely supernatural, and obviously miles out of my forte of expertise.'

'You're fucking annoying. Wait what did you say?'

'What did who say?'

'What did you do to my hair?'

'I wanted to see what it looks like when it's not coiffed. So sue me. (Please don't)'

'Whatthefuckever.'

'..You didn't peek, did you?'

'Ugh no! Why the fuck would I do that?'

'I don't know whether I should be relieved or insulted by that. I'm glad I didn't go commando last night. That would have been awkward.'

'... What?'

'I didn't realise your eyesight was this bad though.'

'Fuck off.'

'No, like I noticed how much you squint at everything, but it never occurred to me that you'd need glasses. How many fingers am I holding up? Even I don't know and I'm the one holding them up. Aren't you the rich kid? Why can't you afford glasses? You should invest.'

'Fucking stop your babbling. And don't fucking baby me. You can't talk to me like that; don't you know who I am?'

'You mean who I am? If you hadn't noticed, darling, I am you.'

'Does my hair always look like this? It looks awful.'

'I couldn't find your brush.'

'Oh so you went snooping through my stuff?'

'As if you didn't go through mine.'

'How could I have? I can barely see out of these damn eyeballs. You really need glasses, Nate.'

'This can't be happening.'

'It's too late for that line of thinking, sweetie. We'll have to deal. Hopefully our... conditions won't last longer than 24 hours.'

'What are we supposed to do until then, huh? Because you're not going anywhere as long as you're in my body.'

'Relax. What could I even do? Everyone will just think I'm high, which isn't such a terrible assumption, since it's usually true.'

'Shut the fuck up. You can't wander around being you. I'm you now—oh fuck.'

'Don't look so horrified by the concept. I'm awesome.'

'Don't smile like that with my face. It looks weird.'

'Smiling is a rarity, huh? Well I'm going to have to do it just to piss you off now. Maybe I'll even take a bunch of selfies to remember this moment.'

'Don't you fucking dare.'

'... Hey, Nathan?'

'What is it now?'

'How do guys pee?'

'... Fuck.'

'Do I have to look at your—'

'No!'

'I can't let you do it; it'd be even weirder because that's my body you're occupying.'

'I wasn't going to suggest—'

'Fuck it. I have to go. Oo I've always wanted to pee in a bush without all the girl stuff.'

~

'Anyway, you can't go out in that, Nate.'

'Why the fuck not?'

'Because those are my PJs. I'm not even wearing a bra.'

'What does that matter?'

'You've gotta support the girls, babe! Guys think it's hot to see tits jiggle but it's the most uncomfortable thing ever.'

'Don't fucking say that stuff with my voice. It's embarrassing. Don't let anyone hear you say shit like that.'

'Stop swearing so much with mine then.'

'Fuck off.'

'Tits.'

~

'Why won't this fucking thing clip together? Stop laughing.'

'Its funny because you've probably taken off god knows how many bras for sexy times and you can't even do one up.'

'Fuck. Come here.'

'There's only so long I can find this amusing before it just gets sad. Here. All done. Don't play with it. Just put my shirt on and stop staring at them.'

'Don't tell me what to do.'

'Then don't play with my body. I might retaliate.'

'You wouldn't dare.'

'Oh I would. I'm naturally very curious.'

'Hey, Sera, you still here?'

'That's Max. You've got to get rid of her!'

'I fucking know.'

'Now act more like me, or she'll know some thing's up.'

'Yeah, I know, jesus. She won't fucking leave me alone.'

'Max, hey. Now's not a great time—'

'Ah sorry, it's just been a weird day and I just wanted to talk to you? I feel like you're the only one who really gets it, you know?'

'Jesus, it's not even afternoon yet. I get it though, it's been a pretty weird day for me too. (Probably way weirder than yours, anyway).'

'You too? Can I come in?'

'Ah no, sorry. Like I said, now's not the best time.'

'O-oh. Um sorry. Is there someone else in there?'

'What? No, of course not.'

'I could have sworn I heard—'

'It's fine, don't worry about it. You should probably get to class, right?'

'Yeah, you're right. Aren't you coming too?'

'I'll be right behind you. I've just got to get changed and finish off some stuff.'

'Well, okay then...'

Footsteps trailed away. Max was gone.

'Wow. You make a pretty convincing me. If I didn't know better, I'd think you were me. Kudos.'

'Did you take improv class or something? Or have you been watching me?

'Don't get fucking used to it.'

'And back to swearing. You've broken your record of 5 minutes no cursing. Damn.'

'Yeah, what a fucking shame.'

'Shush.'

[the-firebird69]

not the abovenope

nope and he hit it and in silence

The thing looks really cool when the doors are down and the backs down and it ran better in the front end looks better and the rear end looks better and it's all shined up and stuff and it's low it looks really awesome it is very low and it had a volkswagen it had the original Volkswagen in it and the rear window is a joke it looked like **** and everyone hated it it'll need four people and boy it wasn't faster without that garbage in the back seat. And his seats were terrible and these seats aren't that great this is what it looks like when it's partially fixed. The rear end is a little bit different. Looks pretty good. These kids are not available it's way too old and it is a honey if you do it right and modifying this car is not hard and changing a few things makes it into a super car and it doesn't exactly make it legal now it does way out of production for many years and they say the styles old and antiquated and the thing is that the speed of it was intense and there's a few reasons it's the shape of the front it's kind of like a Ferrari it's very much like one there's the sides which are kind of vertical and the rear end and the foil and that's where our friend here comes in and his wife and I left the rear end looking cool yeah and I filled it in it looks terrible if you don't and I have a modification and it's modern and I'm gonna start making it. It's about damn time he says I'm gonna make it inexpensive'cause I wanna see him tool around it and my guys doing it so he take ships And yeah I know why I'm doing it

tommy f

we see why and it will work

Thor Freya

this is the car and good he says. lol. and lets roll lol. He still would need a Volkswagen and .... to build it and it doesn't have that

He still would need a Volkswagen and a place to build it and it doesn't have that

Hera

I can't explain this when you first make a kit it costs a lot to get a bunch done and they're cheap and try and get them going so you can afford the kit when you do head to put the kit on it it costs a lot less at that point but you're right he would need a garage. And we did plant stuff on this cart and some of it might be seats and I have a prototype for the Porsche 9/11 and we all don't like the police. And we'd be saying he's the cops and it is a better fit it's really a one horse car and it's like a cart you can't fit anything in it and it's just for driving around this one here would be a lot of work even though I might get it going 'cause it's AGT and it's a Bradley and it's really something that would sell a lot and I make it cheap too I know how to make the plant on this in the panels for the Volkswagen. And something crazy he probably do if you got like 30 or 40 grand you driving around in a Porsche and it looks like a Porsche he's pretty smart and so am I about this I know about cars and trucks and bikes and boy does this guy know it. This thing works very well but his father helped and he is the founder of Porsche. It didn't come from Volkswagen when he says that's his wife. The last sense my friend says. I'm gonna go forwards with this this is the one and all my guys will do it and they have a whole bunch of these and we'll go around grabbing them and we know who has them and they're kind of sitting around doing nothing this makes a lot of sense you can get a Volkswagen for a two grand and the kit would probably be at first $1000 when he would get to it and he would buy the Volkswagen only when he saw the kit and I'll tell you what this thing would work great. And he'd feel great 'cause it looks like a Porsche and people would see the difference in how things go and it is different when he had a decent car like the Kia even and it's much better this is horrible but he had a car like it it wasn't the accord it was the firebird and people thought he was cool and weren't really harassing and they felt cool themselves and so we're gonna go ahead with this and I'm calling your head with it and he thinks it's the right thing and it's a good idea he's glad I'm doing it and a lot of people will be and these things will go fast. I do have a prototype up and I have the statistics and they're real

- Standard Volkswagen 130 horsepower zero sixty 4.9 seconds quarter mile 12.9 seconds top speed about 150 miles an hour. And that stock.

- Standard Volkswagen 130 horsepower adding the plant on kit faring only and you would go zero to 60 and 3.9 seconds quarter mile in 10 seconds top speed about 185 miles an hour it's much faster. That's day and night 30 miles an hour 35 miles an hour is very fast. That kit would be about $800.

- The top end and the exhaust and you want to change those for the fairing kit would be the exhaust at least but both go for about $250 that's ridiculous not to change it and your top speed would change zero to 60 would be 3.2 seconds quarter mile would be 8.5 seconds top speed 220 mph.

- in the fairing kit and the upgraded exhaust and top end I am not including tires and rims and other changes if you change the tires and rims and a little bit of the suspension you're going to get 10 to 50 miles an hour more if you take the interior out fully and put in the racing stuff you're going to get 10 miles an hour on top of that and there are a couple more changes you can make one of them is to streamline the car no that's what the fairing kit does it already does that. Basically that's what you're gonna have 245 mph plus and that is on the 130 horsepower and then a lot of them came with a 150 horsepower top speed would be 280 mph. And I have all the data and testing and I was getting ready to produce it and he started talking about it after I had it ready and that's how it goes they did it with the Camaro and Firebirds and I will probably do that for the Ferrari and those things go about 480 mph but this is a small car with a small amount of power and boy it didn't move and it sounds awesome and it looks just like a Porsche 9/11 you would not believe it it is intense people love it our friend he would love it he would probably drive it everywhere. And Jim in that would be amazing because Of the history if you combine this with what's going on and people think he's growing in his code that helps us and it is about the empire so let's get going on this folks and let's see if anybody wants to submit a real order And I take all sorts of currency for producing this.

tommy f

we might and yeh think on it no. we buy some yes.

bja

and dont have time to make them prob not true

works form e though

tommy f

we need it now all of it

trump

tons do buy what you cn i f any you louse. hahah lol this blows.

tommy f

we use it no need it now

mac dadddy order up and i can delive some ok. test it.

we do it and speed shops want it badly

bja

Olympus This is the winning idea and a lot of people want it it's just that they're not making it if they find someone making it they're gonna order it.

[fizzingwizard]

Random:

My shoes are broken so on Wed I tripped and smashed into the sidewalk. Scraped up one hand and knee. Haven't done that in a looong time, forgot how annoying the sting is. Several people stopped to see if I was okay, though, which was sweet. And the next day a woman who saw me fall actually stopped me at the train station to ask how I was. Aw, humanity. (I switched to another pair of shoes, but they aren't waterproof so *sigh* I have to go shoe shopping, which I hate. Why do people even make shoes that aren't waterproof? If it goes on your feet it should have defenses against the elements imo.)

We had our second yearly observation this week and my students were angels. I mean their halos were glowing aaaall day. I got nothing but great feedback and it was an awesome day, yay.

Last week a fast food place opened near my work and my coworkers have been going like every day. On the first day they all went together bahahaha. I resisted because I'm technically trying to not eat so much ~*bad stuff*~. But on Thurs, my coworker ate a big burger and loaded fries right next to me and I couldn't get the smell out of my head. So I had to go XP Honestly, it's good that I went, because the food I got was really pretty not good, so I was reminded that I... don't actually like that particular fast food place anyhow x'D So hopefully, despite it being so close, I won't be tempted often in the future.

Work bitching under the cut:

Over the rest of the week my students slowly morphed back into their usual gremlin selves x'D with Friday being the toughest day of all, because of course I was sick and so are a bunch of the kids, and of course, it was also the first day in a while where we had almost a full class (just one absence). My usual coteacher was out, the other was there, and great as she is she is still new and very young, so it leaves all the classroom leadership and behavior management to me. Hard enough on good days, but so damn tough when the kids are extra wired like they were on Fri. If the observation had been on Friday I'm sure I'd have gotten one or two critiques during the feedback session hahaha.

I do know what the issue is too, why some days are so much harder than others: certain kids aren't good grouped together. I have one student who thinks other kids are playing when they tell him to leave them alone or get angry at him. He just keeps chasing and provoking them with a big smile. After several months, he still doesn't understand anything we say to him in English. He understands Japanese, but there's understanding and then there's understanding, lol. We explain to him that right now it's time to walk and we will get to run once we are outside, but it doesn't stick. He's a sweetie who doesn't get angry or try to hurt anyone, but when you try to talk to him and explain things, he twists and goes limp and does everything he can to avoid looking at you and engaging, no matter how calm your voice is. So he obviously knows he's "in trouble" (we try hard not to make the kids feel like they're being punished, and to respect their individual wants and needs alongside what the class needs. But even two year olds aren't stupid: if they're the only one being pulled aside while the other kids play, they know it's because the teacher isn't happy with something they did. They don't believe smacking their friend with a toy tomato hurts anyone, but they believe the teacher believes it does... haha -.-;)

Among the other kids, it's a lot of very high energy boys who love to scream at the top of their lungs during free play. I know that if a teacher sat with them, she would be a calming influences. And I know that if I could shorten the length of free play time, this would be less of a problem too. We don't have so much trouble on days when for example Student A is there but Student B isn't, because they ping off each other and that gets the rest going etc. Unfortunately, when everyone is together, I'm not able to put a teacher in the middle of them due to having way too much to do in way too little time. It is getting better compared to the beginning of the year, when lunch time and clean up took foreeeever. The main reason is because the kids are for the most part eating by themselves and eating faster.

However, when the number of kids in the class is large, it's always going to need a certain amount of time. In addition, afternoons are SO tight. In order to do our afternoon activity, I need to be starting it at a certain time, and I absolutely need to be cleaning it up by half an hour later, because our room is also the nap room, so we need to put out all the cots. One quarter to half of our time is used just getting out all the cots and blankets four the two classes who nap in my room. That's also one teacher I don't have with the kids during that time, because she's doing the cots, and I need to change diapers as well as take kids to the toilet and teach their end of the day lesson, all within 15-20 minutes. Yesterday it was beyond impossible. We only got through it by hustling.

In terms of how to deal with the timing, I had a talk with two other classes a week ago about their schedules. They are not nap rooms, so their entire post-lunch period is all to themselves. They have half as many students as I do, but their kids are a year younger so do need even more help. That's why it's tricky, I can't push them to do things faster than the kids are able, especially since we're also always trying to foster independence, which means teachers can't hurry things along by doing it for them all the time. However, I did try to point out that nap rooms don't have the luxury of a full afternoon to do all our chores and activities, and that while our kids are a year older, they're still very young and there are a lot of them. So I asked that as much as possible, the other classes try to finish their bathroom breaks on time, so my class doesn't keep having to wait and wait and wait. The waiting isn't the problem so much as it keeps one of my coteachers in the bathroom for forty minutes. So I'm down one teacher when I reeeeally need all hands on deck. Last year this period only took 20 min and I thought that was too long. It's taking 40 min no joke and the reason is both because the younger classes are taking more time to start and finish lunch (they have to be in the bathroom before and after and we get held up both times) and also because my class and the other 2-3s class have 18 kids nearly every day. We don't take all 18 at once of course. But the bathroom isn't exactly a safe place, and yet we're always winding up with 18 kids from three different classes in there anyway... To me it's a safety hazard and I've mentioned it before. But I'm definitely a lot more cautious than many of my coworkers, and even the ones who say "Yeah, I agree with Fizz," just keep doing the same thing, so. I wouldn't say what we're doing is dangerous, but I do think it's inefficient and confusing, which can lead to danger. However, the main effect is the sucky timing.

For years I've felt that what we really need is 30 min more wiggle room. If we just had that, there wouldn't be these constant traffic jams. The school building is way too small for the amount of students it has (typical Japan) and if one thing is delayed, everything is delayed for everyone. So it's such a tight tight schedule. And we wanted to build in more flexibility this year, because there were so many new teachers (lit just me and my coworker who stayed from previous years, although another experienced teacher did transfer over and a sub who worked here before ended up sticking around a lot - but that's like 1/5 of the staff, all the rest are brand new and some are brand new to working with young children too). So we eased up the schedule, with the caveat that it was probably going to be too hectic at the end of the day for me and the other 2-3s class. However, I really don't even know whether the other class is struggling with their afternoons the way mine is. One thing in their favor is their classroom is next to the bathroom. They just send their kids back and forth from one room to the other. Mine is all the way down the hall and often, if you yell, no one hears you, so usually I have to take groups of kids at a time and keep them until everyone's finished. It would be nice if the other class was having the same issue as mine because then I'd probably get more support convincing the 1-2s classes that they need to try to stick to their schedule a bit closer, but. I don't really know what else I can do at this point: kids eat at the rate they eat, kids need to pee when they need to pee, and we teachers only have two hands apiece.

In the end I don't think any of this particular stress is anyone's fault, but the fault of the school's schedule, which is out of our hands. I don't get why we can't start class time 30 min earlier, it would make it all so much easier. I was told the reason once but I can't remember it. I'll ask again just because I'm curious. We are expected to do so much in four hours it's like. So much goes on in those four hours that they feel like a whole day, but once you're done with them you still have four more hours of work. It is really nuts to look at the clock realize that you're totally exhausted and it's only been an hour since lunch, hahahahaha.

[arlothia]

Okay, I'm going to try and make this one brief because we are T minus 60 minutes until the next ep!!!

*a note from 30 minutes in the future: tumblr did something and deleted ALL I had written and I was SO close to the end I'm going to cry!!! GHA!!!! But here I go again!!!*

Okay, I NEED to see that Wrecker fanart!! That's PERFECT!!!!! 😂😂😂😂😂 And as rats are part and parcel with chickens (trust me, I've had chickens my entire life and where there are chickens, there's food, and that means there's rats!), Wrecker would also figure out little explosive...insurances that there aren't any infestations ;)

Whereabouts in Europe are you from? Are you going to Celebration this year??? I live in the US but I'm Italian and Croatian on my mom's side and I'd love to visit there!!

I hadn't thought about Cid being interrogated like that but it makes sense! As for Crosshair, what about this: They made a point of showing that Rampart learned that the Batch was alive, now that he's imprisoned he spills those beans, and they figure that interrogating Crosshair might be a good way to try and figure out where they are so they can get Omega.

History is so awesome and interesting! I'm also not well versed in the EU and Legends stuff, but I'm looking forward to learning more! I got a lot of books to read! :P

Ep 5 was the weakest of the bunch for me, but it was still a fun Indiana Jones-style adventure. And if it's there just to get to know Phee better, I'm okay with that :)

"emotionally constipated space monk wizards" I LOVE IT!! 😂😂😂

So many threads, so little time. Though hopefully they'll get enough time to tell aaaaall the stories they want to tell!! But yes, let's not make kidnapping/rescue the go-to plot for each finale, yes? :P

"an old geezer with magic powers, a whiny teenager who never stepped foot outside his backyard, an asshole smuggler, a giant 7-foot-tall lump of hair, a robot with an anxiety disorder, an astromech who had more war crimes under his belt than the damn emperor himself and a girl whose entire civilization was destroyed and acted like it was nothing" - YOU DID IT AGAIN!!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣 And that is SO true about R2! You know what I need to see? R2 and Chopper just going on a completely unhinged rampage! Who needs a ragtag group of misfits or an elite squad of enhanced soldiers? You just need those two and you're good!! hahaha

Yup, the top part is just the hanger. Time to get sneaking!!

Yeah, unknowns are scary, but I'm sure as I do more research, take some classes, and get some experience things will feel a lot better. Then it'll just be a matter of getting jobs! hahaha! My gosh there are SO many different British accents! It can be hard to pin some of them down, make sure you're getting the sounds and inflections right... One weird thing with me is sort of mixing up or switching between Scottish/Irish when I'm trying to do one, or Aussie and Kiwi as well! One thing I find helps me is just listening to videos on youtube or finding movies/TV shows of people speaking with those accents to help solidify them in my brain. But my GOSH DBB is the GOAT!!!! Total idol!!! Thank you so much for your kind words of encouragement! You are so sweet and kind! I hope your endeavors in leaning a British accent go well! I'm sure you'll get the hang of it! :D Go us! Woot!! *hugshugshugs*

I like your TBB season outline! Makes sense to me! Let's go it!!!!!

OH MY GOSH THAT IS SUCH A SAD IDEA!!! 😭😭😭😭 I don't know if I'll ever be ready to see Rex die! but whenever that time comes I hope they do it in animation. I just feel like since we started the journey with Rex and Ahsoka in animation form with Dee and Ashley, it's only fitting to end it that way, too. It's more familiar and therefore would be more impactful and would be a great way to bookend it. But I'm okay with that being a veeeeery long way off!!!

I love the idea of seeing all of this galactic-level stuff seen through the eyes of a normal person. POV is a powerful thing in storytelling and that would be great to see!!

Hey, if stupid is the reason we get these amazing shows, I'm okay with that! :P

OH MY GOSH I LOVE ALL OF YOUR IDEAS!!!!!! If there's anything I can do to help just let me know! I'm a beta reader and actually have a degree in creative writing, so yes! Please don't hesitate to ask! More than happy to help!! Bring on the angst and fluff!!! THIS is me! Hope you like what you see :)

It is exactly 1 minute until the next ep so I am not getting to your reddit response tonight! Best of luck with your classes! And enjoy the ep!!

Pleasure to meet you, Asia! I'm on discord, too! Feel free to drop a friend request! This is me: Arlothia#1777 Maybe we can move both threads of conversation over there so it's in one place!

And now... I WATCH!!!!! EEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Tell me what you think because I realised this shit as I was falling asleep and I now I can't go unless I get it out there:

Does the colour scheme of the background sort of look like the colour scheme of the houses and buildings on Pabu?

So, theory: Cid didn't sound...normal? the last time she contacted the guys and it's actually because the empire has gotten hold of her to try to bait the bad batch into coming into contact with her again. Well, that didn't work, so Cid suggests contacting Echo alone and tells him about Cross needing help (she knows the group has split) and that checks the "Cid is going to betray them" checkbox. Echo and Rex fall for it, contact the rest of the batch because they are going to need as much help as they can get in infiltrating Tantiss, and head to Pabu to rendezvous. That's where we get the long awaited Echo and Omega reunion. The group head to Tantiss, get Crosshair out, but in the process Omega is captured. They are forced to leave her to save injured/drugged/traumatised/comatose Cross and themselves. We open season 3 on Omega being experimented on or being mistreated to get Nala Se to cooperate.

[innovativestruggles]

daisuzu is definitely going to be canon. we really shouldn't worry about what the staff does to hype up fans because daisuzu has been implied since the beginning. maybe it won't be explicit, but it'll be there. besides, daiharus love to blow up and over exaggerate any interaction that happens between them, so don't think too deeply about it.

Absolutely correct! ✔️✔️

I know how hard it is to feel left behind when you are a shipper of a rarepair (omfg I still don’t understand why I keep doing this shit to myself by shipping rare pairs all the time lmao), but I definitely believe, based on the enormous speculations made, that there will be some sort of DaiSuzu canon. And as you said, whether it is overtly or covertly, there will be something there at least. I reckon even something like revealing their true relationship to each other (as in whether they are true relatives or not), would be a good indicator as to whether they would be canon or not 💕

To the Anon who sent me the ask about the twitter post (and anyone else who feels rattled by the promo team and crazy daiharu fans), just keep remembering that it is a deliberate marketing strategy what the promo team and the FKBU staff are doing. They need to retain viewers, especially after what happened in eppy 8! 

You have a lot of support behind you! Us DaiSuzu shippers will never give up! We are certain we will get something at least! 💜💜 💖