#dadsaremanicbynature
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my dad may be crazy and i may be seething with fear, hatred and self-doubt, but at least I'm meeting up with a cute t-guy tonight
#thots et al#wish me luck idk if hes into me that way but hes so cute...#i just can't stop thinking about what happens to me jobwise after i graduate#i always find my way but I'm scared of ending up back at square one#like if this internship doesnt turn into a job i might just flat out Die#like i know i won't actually but thats the only way to convey how it feels#and how badly i want this it hurts it huuurts how badly i want this#i just spent 20 minutes of my lunch break on the phone with a social worker#and we still have no idea what to do with dad when they discharge him#i texted his landlord to see if he still has a lease but idk if he'd even want to go there#i wish i gave more of a fuck#i feel like im only doing this bc i feel like i should or have to#when in my heart rn i kinda want to let him rot#how do you cope when you love someone so much and yet it's still not enough?#guess thats how i feel about this job too#anyway#i just started crying in dunkin donuts#newenglandcore#depressioncore#dadsaremanicbynature
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