#dacullum-writes
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Letās talk about the moment Aziraphale *almost* denies the Metatron.
āAnything you need to take with you?ā
āNo. Nothing I can think of.ā
His voice is uncertain. He gazes longingly through the window, where Crowley waits by the Bentley. Aziraphale hasnāt lost him yet. It isnāt too late to change his mind. We can see it play out across his face, and he wheels on the Metatron.
āIāI think Iā¦ā
What? Changed my mind? Made a mistake? Canāt do this? Canāt do it without Crowley? The micro expressions going on in this second look out the window are absolutely crushing. The hint of a smile is gone. His face is cast in shadow. He is resigned.
Heās decided. The possibility he could fix things in Heaven is too strong a draw to back out now. Crowley is still waiting out there. Heāll always be waiting. Maybe Aziraphale can make a better world for him.
āNothing at all.ā
This smile is *forced.* Aziraphale truly believes he can change the system. He needs Crowley. But the only thing he wants more than being with Crowley *right now* is the chance to be with him indefinitely in a world where they are free to love one another without fear.
The entire scene is shot in such a way that when Aziraphale is alone on screen, he occupies only half of the frame. He is only one part of a whole, and the loss of Crowley (for the time being) is palpable. Out in the street, the shot of Crowley is framed in a similar way, though reversed.
I still feel ways(TM) about Aziraphaleās decisions at the end of E6, but this little moment of āIāI think Iā¦ā is proof he considered backing out, and almost, *almost* went through with it. He could have rushed to Crowley, could have run away with him to the South Downs or to Alpha Centauri, but the system would stay broken, and any peace they wouldāve had would only be borrowed. He wants to give Crowley the real thingāall of his love, all of the future, unfettered by the constant threat of a corrupt Heaven.
#good omens#neil gaiman#aziraphale#michael sheen#crowley#david tennant#ineffable husbands#dacullum-writes
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If you need me Iāll just be over here learning at the masterās feet.
How long do you usually give a book before you decide you're not going to finish it?
Until I die.
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I still canāt believe I live in a post-S2 world, where I have 24/7 access to an honest-to-someone Aziracrow kiss but it hurts too much to watch.
He is so broken here. In a way he just *wasnāt* after the bandstand breakup. He even perks up when the bell above the door chimes again, thinking perhaps Crowley changed his mindā¦and even if he hadnāt, if Crowley came back at all at this point Aziraphale would have stayed with him. So much hope in that next look toward the doorā¦
ā¦but itās only the Metatron. Crowley hasnāt crawled back to him. Crowley has held firm the line. Crowley has drawn his boundary lines. Heās had enough. Heās not coming back. The hope fades to disappointment and horror.
ā¦Crowley is really gone. Maybe this time for good.
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Baby girl pulls off the color combo by sheer willpower.
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Met a hero in real life today. She is a lovely human and a beautiful writer.
Hereās to both: unwillingness to compromise on the authenticity of your craft, as well as the pursuit of social commentary in prose.
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And knowing what comes later at the ball, Aziraphale first initiating touch/physical intimacy with this chest touch and then with dancing and hand-holdingā¦
ā¦it further refutes the idea that the kiss was unwanted or unwelcome. Oh, Aziraphale wanted it. Heās wanted it at least all season. But he didnāt want it to be a kiss goodbye. Their last touch before Crowley walks away.
āI forgive you.ā
There is something extraordinarily intimate about touching someone while not even looking at them. It says:
- I know exactly where you are in reference to me, I donāt even have to look when reaching for you.
- Iām so confident in our relationship I know exactly how youāll react when I touch you, I donāt have to look and gauge your reaction at all.
- I can interact with you while giving only part of my attention to you, I trust you completely.
- If Iām giving a large portion of my attention elsewhere, I still need to somehow feel connected to you.
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My giant fiddle-leaf, Janthony (itās not just a J) and his children of divorce. The little fiddle-leaf is Bentley; she lost a bunch of leaves after S2 and is still recovering. Muriel, the monstera, is oblivious as usual. Muriel knows something is up and they are trying their best to please their dad. I see your tender new growth, Janthony. Hang in there. The light is coming.
#good omens#anthony crowley#david tennant#neil gaiman#dacullum-writes#ineffable husbands#grow better
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Alternate ending.
#good omens#david tennant#michael sheen#ineffable husbands#neil gaiman#terry pratchett#there i fixed it#dacullum-writes
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Listen.
Iām trying to move forward, okay?
Some days itās easier to tackle a new creative project. Some days I can water my peace lilies without getting emotional.
But today I cracked open a new book that takes place in London, and I saw them everywhere: St. Jamesās, Soho, Chinatown.
How long am I legally required to be tormented as a child of the ineffable divorce?
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Janthony, nooo! Youāre letting the sadness of S2 get to you. You have to try. You have to care. For me. Youāre my friend. I love you.
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Chapter 19 of my fic, Strangers Again, is out today.
āI thought, at the time, that my,ā Aziraphale seemed to choke briefly on the word, and he swallowed as though forcing down bile, āthat the kissāand whatever else it becameāwould be a means to an end. But it wasā¦misguided. I see that now. If anything, it seemed to h-have the opposite effectā¦one of driving him away.ā He hummed thoughtfully, shifting his feet. When he spoke next, his voice was melancholy. āI suppose, in the eyes of this committee, our acquaintance could be interpreted as a misappropriation of resources. But I had my orders.ā
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40s Crowley's coat is too bulky. There, I said it.
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"Aziraphaleās heart was a cold weight in his chest, the corpse of a once-brilliant star that sucked all light, his center of gravity, the shared moments of companionshipāinto blackness. A bit of his soul, redacted and unspeakable."
Chapter 18 of my fic, Strangers Again, is out today.
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Bentley needed a change of scenery. In the South Downs, if you will. The fresh air and the view have done her a world of good.
Look at her precious little new leaf! She is trying so hard.
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āBut the only thing he wants more than being with Crowley *right now* is the chance to be with him indefinitely in a world where they are free to love one another without fear.ā
THIS
ALL OF THIS
Letās talk about the moment Aziraphale *almost* denies the Metatron.
āAnything you need to take with you?ā
āNo. Nothing I can think of.ā
His voice is uncertain. He gazes longingly through the window, where Crowley waits by the Bentley. Aziraphale hasnāt lost him yet. It isnāt too late to change his mind. We can see it play out across his face, and he wheels on the Metatron.
āIāI think Iā¦ā
What? Changed my mind? Made a mistake? Canāt do this? Canāt do it without Crowley? The micro expressions going on in this second look out the window are absolutely crushing. The hint of a smile is gone. His face is cast in shadow. He is resigned.
Heās decided. The possibility he could fix things in Heaven is too strong a draw to back out now. Crowley is still waiting out there. Heāll always be waiting. Maybe Aziraphale can make a better world for him.
āNothing at all.ā
This smile is *forced.* Aziraphale truly believes he can change the system. He needs Crowley. But the only thing he wants more than being with Crowley *right now* is the chance to be with him indefinitely in a world where they are free to love one another without fear.
The entire scene is shot in such a way that when Aziraphale is alone on screen, he occupies only half of the frame. He is only one part of a whole, and the loss of Crowley (for the time being) is palpable. Out in the street, the shot of Crowley is framed in a similar way, though reversed.
I still feel ways(TM) about Aziraphaleās decisions at the end of E6, but this little moment of āIāI think Iā¦ā is proof he considered backing out, and almost, *almost* went through with it. He could have rushed to Crowley, could have run away with him to the South Downs or to Alpha Centauri, but the system would stay broken, and any peace they wouldāve had would only be borrowed. He wants to give Crowley the real thingāall of his love, all of the future, unfettered by the constant threat of a corrupt Heaven.
#good omens#ineffable husbands#dacullum-writes#also them being framed on one half of the screen deliberately#so good
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