#cuz im running on two hours or sleep and i only just now ate something

[neonpigeons]

a very stressful week of noodle acting extremely lethargic, having no appetite, and having really itchy paws has resulted in two trips to the vet and some meds but no obvious answer as to what's wrong. but he seems to be doing a bit better now so that's. good

[astro-neer]

Day 1, Morning...

Ugh, idk why am i even doing this, maybe because i don’t have anything left in my life, and no one to talk to... I’ll talk to myself as usual... Slept 14 hours, had 3 terrible dreams, heared my parents arguing because of my school, they want to put me down to 4 points.. Yeah, Life fucked up even more. First dream.. Me and She with her friend are going by the street.. We’re not together... She goes a bit faster so i fuck up behind with her friend.. Then some guy comes to her, unknown guy for her, starts flirting, i am standing behinde and watching till im enough of this shit, i go in a say “She’s taken, back off!” She looks at me, says that we broke up, gives him hand and just walks away ... I’ve gone crazy , started running in the opposite direction.. Then i’ve just stopped. Looked at her direction, thought “nah man i can’t let it happen” Then started running toward them, but couldn’t find them. Came to some abandoned school, it was huge, with underground places... There were alot of punks, but i couldn’t locate Her.  So i’ve started texting, calling her, begging her to answer, but she didn’t , one time i’ve called with camera, she answered and all i’ve seen is darkness... She ended the call, i wrote “Where the fuck are you??” Then she called again with camera... I’ve seen her going on the underground, with this guy behind her, they were holding hands.. Then she just stopped, putted the camera on some idk highway, and bended over, letting this guy tie her up... While she’s with skirt, bending over.... Then this dream ended. I was talking while sleeping, my mom told me... I was telling alot of shit, she is worried.. I am worried aswell. It was a fucking nightmare to see, it felt so real... Next dream... Idk it’s kinda strange , me and her, we have superpowers.. I am immune to death, i can’t die, and she has something she didn’t yet uncover, so they took her aswell. they took us into a Lab, like Lab Rats... There we met a professor who willed to help us get out, and he did. Her power was tolearn other powers, and know to use them... We ran away, with the professor, and we got to an edge, where we Jump, from a kilometers height, or we stay . A huge crew of soldiers were running towards us...So we’ve jumped. I took the professor, hugged him with my body , and jumped first, I saved him with my own body, and ofc came back to life, then She jumped , i catched her, we both stayed alive cuz of our powers. But suddenly we got surrounded with soldiers... Then outta nowhere appeared a guy, a guy with a wand, a good looking beard, good looking guy, high..he had unusual suit.. it was glowing a beat. So he casted some shit, and all the soldiers just lost their mind and fell on the ground. After that his right side of the suit started glowing .We kept running away, but suddenly  some strange guy teleported infront of us... They could teleport.. (Really nigga?) this guy... He told us to run.. But we stayed. Then he said that he is Sorry, and casted that spell again... After he did so, his Left side of the Suit was glowing, then he just casted some shockwave, it took my powers for a little while, and fucked up everyones vision. We didn’t see the world as it is. We saw it in strange figures, like its a fucking Cartoon.. We could see normally only if we were close to him. So i took the risk, and just tried to fly away, see what happens. And i lost my mind and fell down, from a high height, and just fell in coma for 2 years. After i woke up.. I was in a hospital.. It was 2 years later... When i woke up, nobody knew.. Not even her.. Only few ppl that was with me in my hospital room.. They told me what happened, and told me im in the future, i didn’t believe at first. They showed me the look out of the window, they showed me their Phones, They were really different of mine, The future was so beatiful untill the moment i went out of the hospital. The streets were dark, blue - colored and empty... Empty of everyone. I’ve went home, to the home i once used to live in... Down there i’ve met my friend Stas, i’ve asked him what’s hes doing here and he told me he lives here so i was kinda happy.. Oh stas, usually with his seeds, eating them everywhere, he was happy to see me.. i was happy to see him. I’ve asked him if i still live here, he told me i do.. I’ve askedwhere is She, and he told me she moved away, to another city.. I went into my building , and on the intercoum i’ve heared my family talking, they enabled it so i could hear whats going on the house, they warned me not to get into the house, cuz there is some checkings, idk, i didn’t mind. I took stas on my, and Flied up to the sky, Asked him the direction, to find Her. When i got to her house, i’ve knocked.. She opened, wen’t away, first thing i did is trying to kiss her, she didn’t let me... So i hugged her. We started walking by some empty park, we were talking , she told me what happened, she told me we won the fight against the library, i asked what’s that War name, she had no answer... Then she told me .. That she and this “Magician” guy are together... For almost two years.. She said i was gone ,and she didn’t know what to do, and fell in love with him.. That killed me... Then this guy came out.. we sat down, three of us.. She didn’t tell him i know they’re together, i didn’t tell him i know, So i tried to touch Her, and he told me she’s taken. I was playing myself surprised.. And asked this Guy to come with me for a second, they were both afraid, but i said that it’s fine , and that i just want to talk tohim... So he came with me, and we started talking, i kept asking if she’s happy with him, he kept saying that they’re happy for almost two years.. I’ve asked him a dozen of times to take care of her, protect her and so on.. He sweared to do all of that.. I’ve said that i’ll be gone of their life, but i’ll be fine, i’ll be the “protector” of this fucking city, and that’ll be alone , but fine.. Here our talk ended, I wanted to fly away, And he told me he can’t fly.. I asked what happened to his powers, and he said Nothing, and that he can Fly and use them only when she’s close to him...  She said that he just got attached to her, obsessed with her.. Just as i was... Then i understood how strong their love is, and just flew away. Here my dream ended.... My next dream was.. Ugh .. I can’t talk to her in reality , so i fucking dreamed how i talk to her, in my dream, i how i tell her all of these two dreams about us, i ask her how is she, we talked alot.. But then i woke up and realized... Then a mini dream came in.. In which i tell her “in reality” that i’ve dreamed of myself talking to her cuz i can’t talk to her in real..  These are my dreams.. Right now i’m sitting, drinking a cup of tea , listening to depressive music, eating the Bamba she bought me, ate just 1 slice so there is enough for next Days.. And , Writing all of this ofcourse for 30 minutes already.. Depressed, Lonely, Empty...

[rockformed]

1-100 for that ask thing. Cuz fuck you

JESUS CHRIST WILLim putting this under a read more fuck you too

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? 

soundcloud!! 

is your room messy or clean?

always messy, last time it was clean was when we first moved in lmao

what color are your eyes?

very dark brown

do you like your name? why?

i do!! cause it means “helper”!! and i love to help vv

what is your relationship status?

single as fuck, ive never been in a relationship ;;

describe your personality in 3 words or less

shy, creative, and passive

what color hair do you have?

natural redhead babeyyyy

what kind of car do you drive? color?

i dont drive ;;

where do you shop?

usually i get my clothes from a place called torrid, they sell plus sized stuff!! but i get all my t-shirts from redbubble and thinkgeek! 

how would you describe your style?

all over the place lmao, messy

favorite social media account

tumblr is m fav just cause the site works the way i think it should, in chronological order 

what size bed do you have?

double

any siblings?

yep!! 2 step brothers, 1 half brother and 1 half sister 

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?

a small cabin on a riverside with self-sustainability. i just dont wanna have to worry about stuff and be left to myself in a cute little cabin!!

favorite snapchat filter?

THE TIGER FACEMASK ONE

favorite makeup brand(s)

dont wear makeup :p

how many times a week do you shower?

i uhhhhh try to shower once every day but i have a hard time remembering a lot ;;

favorite tv show?

atm i dont have one, i dont really watch tv! im excited for the return of steven universe tho 

shoe size?

8 womens

how tall are you?

5′3″ last time i checked!!

sandals or sneakers?

SNEAKERS, i hate sandals :(

do you go to the gym?

used to every day, stopped cause we moved away from my gym and i have no way to get there :(

describe your dream date

oh gosh, i dont really know, something chill where i could get to know the person a bit, maybe lunch at a cute airy restaurant vv

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?

i have misc change and a 15 dollar red lobster gift card lol

what color socks are you wearing?

im not wearing any!!

how many pillows do you sleep with?

3, and many stuffed animals :3

do you have a job? what do you do?

i do commissions, but i dont have a 9-5 “job” yet

how many friends do you have?

oh gosh, uuummmm 2 really good ones, maybe 7 others?? im probably forgetting ;;

whats the worst thing you have ever done?

when i was 5 i stole a harmonica from a cracker barrel and swore on the bible that the woman at the counter let me have it ;;;;; it haunts me everyday for real

whats your favorite candle scent?

i dont have a specific, but i love sweet scented candles, and holiday ones :p

3 favorite boy names

Ben, Oliver, and Andrew 

3 favorite girl names

Lily, Genevieve, and Lorelei

favorite actor?

Robin Williams %100 forever

favorite actress?

amy adams

who is your celebrity crush?

Chris Pratt i guess??? i dont pay too much attention to that stuff :p

favorite movie?

ever, is wreck it ralph, atm is beauty and the beast (not the remake)

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?

i dont read too much anymore, but my favorite book(s) is the Doll People by Ann M. Martin.

money or brains?

brains if by brains you include personality

do you have a nickname? what is it?

a lot of people on here call me Rock, but i dont have a real life nickname!!

how many times have you been to the hospital?

one, when i was born lmao 

top 10 favorite songs

GOD fuck umm, Overwhelming by Jon Bellion, Fiddle and the Drum by Perfect Circle, 24 Karat Magic by Bruno Mars, Ticker Tape by Gorillaz, Separate Ways by Journey, I Believe in a Thing Called Love by The Darkness, Beautiful Girls by Sean Kingston (i know, i know), Kill Your Heroes by AWOLNATION, Clocks by Coldplay, and Hide and Seek by Imogen Heap.

do you take any medications daily?

nope!!

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)

soft vv cause i drink so much fuckin water lmao

what is your biggest fear?

uhhh my loved ones dying and not knowing if i’d be okay if they did??

how many kids do you want?

NONE 

whats your go to hair style?

natural i guess, i dont really do up my hair :0

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)

ideally, id love one of those micro-houses and to travel the country with my house, but if that doesnt work out id like a shotgun style! 

who is your role model?

Robin Williams, again :p

what was the last compliment you received?

“i love the way you color” was the last one!!

what was the last text you sent?

“my feet are gonna fall the fuck off” sent to my mom sjhdfjhdjfs

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?

i didnt grow up believing in santa, my mom always just wrote her name on my presents! 

what is your dream car?

a tucker, even tho thats very VERY unlikely lmao 

opinion on smoking?

dont do it 

do you go to college?

no, but i want to!! 

what is your dream job?

character/concept designer for a film or game studio

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?

rural!!

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?

no >:(

do you have freckles?

lots on my arms, none on my face anymore :p

do you smile for pictures?

yep!! i have a bad sameface problem lmao

how many pictures do you have on your phone?

100+, my phone doesnt tell me an exact number

have you ever peed in the woods?

yep, once when i was younger i got locked out of my house on the way home from school so i had to pee in the woods behind our house and wait for my mom to get home 

do you still watch cartoons?

yeah, its the only thing i really watch lol

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?

Wendys, but Mcdonalds has better fries

Favorite dipping sauce?

sweet BBQ

what do you wear to bed?

sweatpants and a t-shirt!

have you ever won a spelling bee?

no, but i one a book fair contest once!

what are your hobbies?

drawing, singing, music in general, video games, and seeing how long i can stay up without passing out lmao

can you draw?

i like to think so

do you play an instrument?

flute, but i think ive forgotten how by now

what was the last concert you saw?

i havent seen any, but im going to see one next week!!

tea or coffee?

neither, unless we’re talking sweet tea lmao

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?

AMERICA RUNS ON DUNKIN YOU FOOL

do you want to get married?

yes, id like to!! but if the person i end up with doesnt want to im cool with that!

what is your crush’s first and last initial?

im not answering this fkdjgghjdhf

are you going to change your last name when you get married?

depends on the other persons last name and if they wanna change theirs!!

what color looks best on you?

green!

do you miss anyone right now?

yeah, a friend of mine and my dad :(

do you sleep with your door open or closed?

closed and locked lol

do you believe in ghosts?

somewhat

what is your biggest pet peeve? 

when people are rude or self-absorbed ://

last person you called`

my mom

favorite ice cream flavor?

cookie dough!!

regular oreos or golden oreos?

regular (put them in the fridge first, they’re better cold!!)

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?

i hate sprinkles :p tastes like paste 

what shirt are you wearing?

a fallout t-shirt!

what is your phone background?

cinderella’s castle, a pick that i took last time i went to magic kingdom!!

are you outgoing or shy?

shy :3c

do you like it when people play with your hair?

yeah!! but only if i know them fkhgdfg

do you like your neighbors?

some of them, our neighbor to our right is really nice but past that we have two trump supporters and on the left we have a couple thats really really mean lmao

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?

in the morning!!

have you ever been high?

nope 

have you ever been drunk?

nope 

last thing you ate?

 a subway sandwich!!

favorite lyrics right now

???

summer or winter?

WINTER PLS

day or night?

Day, specifially mornings :o

dark, milk, or white chocolate?

milk!!

favorite month?

december :)

what is your zodiac sign

cancer!!!

who was the last person you cried in front of?

uhhhh my therapist lmao

FUCK YOU WILL THIS TOOK ME AN HOUR

[heungtanbts]

re·al·i·za·tion

noun

The moment of sudden clarity when feelings are finally recognized, or are made aware for the first time.

It hit you one late night at the library while you were cramming for and crying over midterms along with the other student zombie population. It wasn't anything out of the ordinary - you were in your regular spot as per usual, inked paper and random notes scattered all around you, the dimming screen of your laptop reflected in your glasses, hair haphazardly pulled back and out of your face. And he was there with you, as per usual, his own laptop illuminating the serious and focused look on his face as he rested his chin on one propped hand while the other worked hard to scroll down his screen on his keyboard. Just two university students, two dormmates, two friends, studying at the library. The only difference between you two? He wasn't studying - oh, no - you knew from the last time you got up and walked past him that he definitely not studying. 

He was too busy immersing himself in novels on his e-reader, either that or he was online shopping and silently but not so subtly ooh-ing and ahh-ing at the prospective of buying new jackets and hats. Though it made your blood boil at times (many times, actually), the fact of the matter was simple - he didn't need to study, unlike yourself. So when you thought about it, it was strange how naturally you two even started to "study" together on a regular basis at the campus's main library. It took you a second to remember how it all came to be, but last semester during the first round of exams, you specifically remembered having gotten a call from Namjoon while studying at the library. It was kind of hard to forget, only because you forgot to silence your phone that day and the sound of Epik High's "Fly" bouncing off the high dome ceiling got you some pretty lethal death glares.

You: WHAT NAMJOON

Joonie: WHOA GOOD EVENING CAPS

Joonie: i was jw where u r

Joonie: and if ur down to get bogo smoothies rn

You: my phone went off and now the entire student population probably hates me and epik high now for breaking their concentration thanks to SOMEONE

Joonie: wow, someones just a tad bit sleep deprived and cranky

You: shut up joon

Joonie: hey its not my fault u forgot to silence your phone

You: i hate you. i hate this. i hate everything.

Joonie: arent u being just a little dramatic?

You: well unlike you, us pea brains actually need to study and i havent slept in the last 38 hours and iTS THAT TIME OF THE MONTH OKAY JUST LET ME LIVE

Joonie: .....so is that a no?

You: joon istg

Joonie: y/n jst hurry up and tell me where u r cuz im bout to spill these smoothies amd textng w one hand is hard

You: ...are these smoothies caffeinated

Joonie: no but i got ur favorite

You: peach mango?

Joonie: of course

You: ...2nd floor, east wing reading room

That's when he discovered your study spot, and from then on, he always knew where to find you if he ever, well, couldn't find you. He would often times switch it up from late night bogo smoothies to double shot espresso shot americanos (especially when he knew you were pretty cranky) or on really really terrible nights, forced but much appreciated midnight taco runs. He had always been such a nocturnal person, by choice though, unlike yourself. But you came to appreciate his company more than you thought you would, even more than the caffeine and sweet or greasy foods he'd buy and scarf down with you. You knew he pretty much never studied, and every time he was with you, you'd have to consciously push those thoughts aside or else he'd go from being the most wonderful and caring person to becoming even more hateful in your eyes. And that might make you forget that this was the guy that always stayed up with you during your consecutive allnighters, put up with your stress-related lash outs at him, made sure you ate something regularly because you'd always forget to eat at normal times, and forced you to take the study breaks you didn't think you needed, and he would do this all voluntarily and weirdly enough, very willingly. You'd never asked him to join you, he just did. And even a whole semester later, he hadn't once let you down as your caffeine supplier and even more so, your good friend.

It wasn't until this particular night that it suddenly all hit you at once. Looking up, your eyes traveled to the other side of the table to see him sleeping peacefully, his head resting on his arms on the table, his carefree face and closed eyes facing towards you. It was just a few minutes shy of 3am and it should've pissed you off that he was frolicking along in dreamland while you were desperately fighting against the cravings to shut your eyes for even just a few minutes. But when you saw his sleeping posture, his skin free from any stress lines and wrinkles, plump lips slightly parted, his one cheek starting to turn red from where his knuckles were leaving an imprint, hate was the last thing you felt. It just hit you that Namjoon was right there, not in his own bed sleeping at a normal godly hour, not spending his time doing his own hobbies or with his other friends – he was here, with you.

"Yo." 

Before you could stop that one word from leaving your lips, he stirred from his sleep, eyes slowly fluttering open as he took a quick, disoriented look around before squeezing them back shut and reaching his long arms out in front of him, stretching and cracking all the stiff joints in his body. With strands of his brunette locks decorating his forehead and drowsiness clinging to his eyelids, he couldn't have looked so different to you in that moment.  

"What's up?" He whispered, his deep raspy voice even lower than it usually was during the daytime. He was staring back at you, his eyes wide open and alert as you took a few seconds longer to think of a reply. What was up? Why did you even wake him up? What did you even want to say to him that was important enough to bother him? You weren't even sure what was going on in your own head. All you knew was that your heart was pounding loudly against your chest, and you had to find out why, you just didn't know how. So you did what any normal person would do if they were to get stuck with a difficult question to answer - shoot a question back at them.

"Why...are you here?"

He looked taken aback, slowly straightening his posture as he shifted to face you straight on. That definitely caught him off guard, but you were even more surprised that you actually asked the question that you didn't even know had been lingering in your mind for some time now. His eyebrows knit together in contemplation as he used the silence to think of an answer to a simple yet not so simple question, and you almost regretted even asking him in the first place. But the flustered look on his face gradually dissipated as his lips curved up into the gentlest of smiles you had ever seen from him, leaning into the palm of his hand yet again, crooking his head to the side so lovingly, his warm chocolatey eyes melting you from the inside out. But his next words would be the ones to really seal the deal. 

"Simple – because you're here."

It hit you one late night at the library while you were cramming for and crying over midterms along with the other student zombie population. You had just finished a peach mango smoothie and ditched your studying completely to admire a handsome yet hateful fellow as he captured your heart with his peaceful sleeping posture, his soft dimpled smile, his deep raspy voice, and his warm, comfortable presence. And it suddenly hit you like an oncoming train. There weren’t any fireworks, no blaring sirens or flashing neon signs – you figured out that none of that was necessary to finally have that realization. All you needed was that undeniable moment of clarity. And as he continued to gaze at you, it hit you hard.

You would never be able to look at Kim Namjoon the same ever again.