#curly shephard has religious trauma i’ve decided

[eviesqueezie]

(idk if i’m supposed to put a tw for this but just know it talks a lot about sinning and religion so pls be careful guys!!)

curly, watching as ponyboy climbs the tallest tree in the lot with his switchblade between his teeth and his busted up converse untied, thinks about the church he went to when he was younger.

the candles glowed in the dimly lit room, reflecting and bouncing off the stained glass windows, shining colourful rainbows across the hall in a sense of sick mockery compared to what they were preaching.

he would always sit in the third row, held down and scolded by his mother when he fidgeted, with angela resting on tim’s hip next to him. his mother would always take an extra gulp of the communion wine, glaring at the pastor as he passed them. no coins clattered into the already rusting metal bowl as he walked by their retched excuse for a family, barely staying afloat by themselves after their most recent step father had disappeared.

ponyboy lifts himself onto a thick branch, pulling out his switchblade and wrapping his hands around the wood before gesturing with his head for curly to follow.

as curly sits, leaning into the embrace of the boy next to him, he thinks about what his mother would say. what his pastor or his priest would say as he laughs with ponyboy, smiling when he smiles and letting his eyes flicker down to his lips.

they would tell him in blunt words, that curly had always feared up until now, that he would be cast down to the pits of hell. cursed a life of misery and eternal damnation.

but he’s already had a life of misery, still has no idea what damnation means and hasn’t stepped in a church in five years.

if what he does in his back bedroom, what he does when he’s hidden away with ponyboy, makes him a sinner. then loving him must be the greatest sin of all.