#culminating in you figuring out where he is and busting in to rescue him
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stellar-collective · 3 months ago
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personally i don’t think that ieytd will be a full-fledged spy series until Agent Phoenix is forced to team up with Zoraxis/a former enemy thought to be dead bc the most important person in their life is being threatened. just my opinion
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365days365movies · 4 years ago
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March 6, 2021: Wolfwalkers (2020) (Part Two)
Living up to the Cartoon Saloon mold so far!
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Although, I do have some thoughts on that whole thing, but...we’ll get there in the Review! Still, this is a gorgeous film with a nice story, and I’m looking forward to the second half! So,  let’s jump in! Part 1 is right here!
Recap (2/2)
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After their night out in the forest, they make their way back to town. Robyn wonders if Mebh’s mom has been caught, which Mebh adamantly denies. However, Robyn has her doubts. In any case, she promises to help Mebh find her mother, and help them leave the woods for a new home.
Robyn heads back home, but as she’s about to enter her human body, she smells something coming from the great hall, which is almost certainly Mebh’s mom, just sayin’. She runs there, past Seán in the stocks, and heads to the hall...before running into her angry father, who’s been hunting her all night. Soon, commotion and gunshots ring out, as does the news of a wolf in the town.
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The chase gets far worse, as Cromwell shows up to kill the wolf with his men. Robyn BARELY manages to escape, and manages to make it into the hall, where the cage is. And yes, this is indeed Moll MacTíre (Maria Doyle Kennedy), Mebh’s mother.
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Moll isn’t happy that Mebh bit Robyn, and is less happy that Mebh is still in the woods. She tells Robyn to tell Mebh to leave with the pack as soon as she can, and not to rescue her from Cromwell’s clutches. And as Cromwell approaches, Robyn hides.
Cromwell, a devout Protestant, prays to God as the Irish people of Kilkenny are rioting about the presence of the wolf. He pledges to civilize this wild land, and it’s revealed that Moll is there to show the townsfolk that Cromwell has “tamed” her, as he will to the woods as a whole. But he sees Robyn as he says this, and fires at her, but she narrowly escapes by jumping into the river below.
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She manages to make her way back home just as Bill arrives, and jumps back into her human body just in time. But it’s not over yet, as Bill is now in BIG fuckin’ trouble with Cromwell, who’s furious. He’s demoted from hunter to foot-soldier, and Cromwell takes over the duty of exterminating the wolves. Robyn tries to stop him, telling him to release the Wolfwalker in front of the town. And Cromwell orders his men to take her to the stocks.
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But at Bill’s urging, he gives them both one last chance. Bill has one more chance to find the wolf’s den, while Robyn must remain a scullery maid and do her duty as well. Which is REALLY hard because she can’t risk falling asleep, or will turn once again into a wolf. The next morning, she does what she can, and sends Merlyn to warn Mebh of the danger.
Mebh, meanwhile, waits for Robyn at their tree the whole next day, but she obviously isn’t coming. Merlyn finds her, which leads to Mebh (in human form, of course) coming into town to find her, with Merlyn’s help. When she does, Robyn relays her mother’s message, to her own sadness, and to Mebh’s confusion and anger, as she believes that Robyn is breaking her promise to help her. They both leave in tears.
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But on the way home, Mebh overhears commotion about a wolf that Cromwell has captured and is displaying in the courtyard, and realizes that this is her mother. She reacts...poorly, and immediately heads to find her mother. Robyn also heads there, as Cromwell has ordered the townsfolk to attend.
Robyn stops Mebh in the crowd, and uses the bullies to capture her in a cage. She tells Mebh that it’s for her own good, which angers Mebh further. This is all while Cromwell is speechifying, nothing that he was sent there by God to tame the wilds, and the wolves. He unveils Moll, to the shock of everyone, and she’s chained up to show her “obedience”. And that’s then Mebh busts out.
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She runs up on stage, to her mom, much to Robyn’s sorrow, Moll’s worry, Cromwell’s shock, and the amusement of the townspeople. Bill is told to catch Mebh, which proves a challenge, and Cromwell grimaces at the townspeople’s laughter. He commands Bill to put Mebh in the stocks, and this angers Moll, who breaks her muzzle and bites Bill OH FUCK DUDE
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Mebh manages to escape the men, and climbs up the walls, where she shouts that she is a Wolfwalker, and will come to town with her pack to destroy it and the townspeople. This is war now. And she leaves to gather her troops.
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Cromwell shakes this threat off entirely, and pledges to burn the forest down that night to destroy the wolves. He berates Bill for his inability to catch Mebh, and gives him one last chance to prove himself, or be put in chains. He also tells him to kill Moll, and to teach Robyn some manners. DICK.
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Once again, Robyn tries to get through to her father, but he angrily turns her away. And as he goes to kill Moll, Robyn is fucking DONE. She stands between her father and the cage, and he responds that he’s doing this because he’s afraid, specifically for her. But he’s distracted by the news of wolves outside the town, and Robyn takes the opportunity.
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Sick. Moll and Robin ride out of town, with the men and Cromwell hot on their tail (literally). They get out of town, though, and find Mebh and the wolves as she’s about to invade the town with the wolves. Mother and daughter tenderly embrace, finally, and Mebh and Robyn make up, becoming friends once more. Yay, happy ending!
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FUCK SAD ENDING
Well, not an ending yet, but yeah, Moll is shot by Bill, who believes she’s in danger from the wolves. As they surround her, they’re all interrupted by Mebh, howling to heal her mother with wild magic. Moll turns into a golden spirit, and heads towards her sleeping body in the woods, with Mebh and the wolves following.
Robyn tries to go after them, but is held back by Bill. She reveals to him that she’s a Wolfwalker, which upsets her father further. He holds her tight, not wanting to lose her, but she wills herself to sleep, and becomes a wolf. She runs off, leaving Bill behind. Cromwell and his men arrive to burn down the forest, and chain Bill up.
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Robyn, Mebh, and the wolves head back to the den, where Moll’s wolf spirit merges with her body, alongside the arrow wound. Mebh tries to heal Moll, but it’s bad. Meanwhile, the men approach, and Robyn takes the wolves to hold them off while Mebh works. Said holding off is also a great sequence, but it’s cut short by Mebh realizing that she needs the pack in order to fully heal her mother.
They retreat to the den, while Bill sees Robin once again, but through...wolf vision this time! THERE we go! Magic’s beginning to settle in through the bite, finally! Cromwell and his men pursue her, and a cannon blast knocks her out. They follow her into the den, and she fights them again after waking up, and disables their cannon fully by making it fire at the ground.
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That also knocks her down and out, and Cromwell comes in to finish the job, about to kill her with a sword. But Bill...Bill’s tired of Cromwell’s bullshit.
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HOLY SHIT, HE LOOKS FUCKING AWESOME.
Bill’s also, like, IMMEDIATELY good at the wolf schitck, and takes out Cromwell without too much difficulty. But Cromwell figures it out, and ties to kill Bill’s human body, only for Robin to wake up as a human and disable him with her crossbow.
This culminates in a battle by the waterfall, and the DEATH OF OLIVER CROMWELL, HOLY SHIT! Something about the catharsis of that whole thing from an Irish film is...fuckin’ palpable, goddamn. After Cromwell’s death, Bill and Robyn unite as wolf father and daughter, and head out to help Mebh and Moll.
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Mebh and Robyn come together, and with the help of the wolves and Bill together, they finally, finally heal Moll’s wound, and bring her back from near death. Mother and daughter happily embrace as well, and Bill and Robyn are officially welcomed into the pack as fellow Wolfwalkers.
They find a new home together, and the new pack is safe
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.And that’s Wolfwalkers! I loved it! I’ll elaborate more in the Review. See you there!
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sanjuno · 5 years ago
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so you inspired this idea with your amazing tobimada fic and meta, and i need you to know about it? basically tobimada soulmates-possibly abo timetravel? where tobimada happens and they have a soulmate/matebond type thing where they can Feel each other, and the peace got made and the village is a few years old and things are good, until zetsu decides to fuck shit up by ambushing madara on the way back from a solo mission and trying to capture him [1/?]
while maybe trying to frame hashirama for it with like, plant bits and blood everywhere? except madara escapes via a fancy modified hiraishin kunai that he and tobi were working on together, but is unfortunately Currently Perforated and so he sort of fumbles the jutsu due to blood loss and ends up being sucked into Ye Olde Time Portal. a search gets sent out when he fails to return from the mission, suspicion brews bc madara was a linchpin of the peace and hes gone, [2/?]
tobi Insists that he can still Sense that madara is alive, but no amount of searching can find him and when tobi tries triangulating or doing any tracking its hopeless, and while he never Gives Up per se, he's forced to accept that madara is Gone pay attention to supporting hashi and keeping the village together bc things are Tense. but instead of dying in the 2nd war, zetsu is like 'i need a scientist bc uchihanapping has been a bust' and yoinks tobi when he does his last stand [3/?]
so everyone thinks tobi is also dead. and then in the far future minato or sarutobi finds an old sealed box of tobi's in the hokage tower, opens it, and finds the Fancy Hiraishin Kunai madara was trying to send himself to, and then also promptly dodges the screaming bloody uchiha who does a mach speed landing when he finally drops out of the time portal and destroys the hokage's office. madara's taken to the hospital until some uchiha can show up and identify him as 'long-dead clan head' [4/?]
and madara is like 'what the fuck' bc in the past like, 80-100 years he's become like, a Legendary Figure who either was murdered by hashi and his body was never found bc it was grown into a tree, or like, he fucked off and has been their secret first missing-nin. but also tobi got brought obito by zetsu, told to 'fix him' with hashirama cells, and then to train him bc tobi is all curse sealed and has to stay in the cave [5/?]
but unlike madara tobi isn't stuck to the statue he's just like, somehow been stasis sealed with natural chakra so as long as he stays in the cave he hasn't aged since zetsu nabbed him. and just, the tobi-obito mentorship. meanwhile madara is like, skilled enough at chakra sensing that councilor danzo is lighting up like an uchiha bonfire, and also discovering how Fucked things got without him there to keep things on track [6/?]
with everything culminating somehow with tobimada being reunited and madara being like /holy shit/ bc tobi used to be younger than him and now he's like, 40 and Rugged? obito getting rescued. the combined trolling powers and genius of tobimada being turned loose on konoha bc the nidaime's reign was characterized by him being too depressed about his mate and this his brother dying to be any fun. and just, time travel fix it in the opposite direction of normal? [7/?]
im really sorry this got so long! but also this thought took some twists and turns?? idk if you like/are comfortable with abo but for that part of the idea basically, a!tobi, o!madara bc like, the territoriality and possessiveness and willingness to Kill You With My Teeth have always seemed more like things that would be more useful for an omega? also madara is the most powerful mother hen. mostly bc i like the idea of like, people in the future think madara is an alpha and he's like. No? [8/8]
=/=
I’m cool with ABO provided that it’s dealt with using Viable Biology and also Refrains From Being Skeevy, please and thanks.
Also this idea is amazing. I’ve never thought about time-travel in the other direction for a fixit. This is brilliant. Thank you so much for sharing. ^_^
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jonarchivistcansing · 5 years ago
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So I have a magnus archives playlist
I’ve been making a long chronological Magnus Archives playlist for my own amusement (So This Is Basically The Magnus Archives) , but since season 5 is close and my college kicked everyone out i decided to Do Something Unnecessary. 
I have taken painstaking effort to not only properly organize this stupid thing with specific tma episodes, but also have documented the episodes as well as why I included the songs (under the cut). This is my Magnum Opus. I have officially pulled an all nighter to work on this. AND i’m making another playlist with songs that I wanted to keep tabs on in case I end up needing to use them as s5 comes out (here) Spoiler warning obviously
Please send me some songs if you follow the playlist and think they should be on there! 
TLDR - Grace for sale = season 1 finale; Bad Bad Things = season 2 finale; Greatest Show Unearthed = season 3 finale; Just Did a Bad Thing = Season 4 finale.
I bold the songs I added most recently. Honestly I recommend listening to the playlist first because its way fun and like referencing this if you really care about it. Please give me song suggestions or alterations! 
Song Name - MAG00 - PoV/Sung at/etc; Event. NA = Not Applicable
The Office Theme - NA
memes
Turn The Lights Off - MAG 01
The whole “Dont go in there” theme is applicable to the danger of the Angler fish, which also parallels that first statement acting as a lure for Jon
Don’t Worry We’ll Be Watching You - NA
I didn’t want to comb through to find an episode where Jon says hes being watched. I might move this somewhere else because it’s really slow for the begining of the playlist. Maybe  where he went to America
Somebody’s Watching Me - NA
Same as above + memes
Bloody Nose - MAG 17 - PoV Jared Hopworth
the boneturner’s tale statement
Grace For Sale - MAG 39 - PoV Jane Prentiss; S1 Finale
I didn’t know this was part of a whole carnival themed album when I added it, but I felt that the themes of shedding your skin and worms were relevant enough. Still looking for a good song for the s1 finale tho :/
I Don’t Trust You Anymore - MAG 40/41 - PoV Jon
Immediately after the Worm Attack, Jon realizes he can’t trust anyone in the archives.
Losing My Mind - NA - PoV Jon
Jon makes a lot of mentions of his paranoia thruout this season and I feel it just fits best here
Little Pistols - NA - PoV Jon
Same as above, but its like Really Sad because this one paints the paranoia as much more self-destructive. 
Afraid - MAG 77 - Multi PoV/Sasha
Jon just realized the NotSasha replaced Sashsa. Could be from Sasha or NotSasha or even Jon realizing the implications a shapeshifting creature, just fkcn love the chorus for the whole NotSasha fiasco
Mr Capgras - MAG 78/79 - Sung by the NotThem
Jon’s a huge idiot and the NotThem is Out For Blood 
Bad Bad Things - MAG 80 - PoV Elias; S2 Finale
Bitch boy Murkd Leitner and Gertrude and he’s an asshole for it
Its not overly literal but i think some characters in the song could be interpreted as Leitner and Gertrude, with the POV Elias speaking to Jon. 
I’m Not Ok - MAG 81 - PoV Jon
Georgie pls....help this nasty man
The Cult of Dionysus - NA
Honestly this isn’t very specific at all there’s just a lot more cult activity in this season and this song lines up well with the next few
Rejoice - MAG 89 - PoV Jude Perry/Lightless Flame
this ep is jude’s statement and this is a Good cult song
Bust Your Kneecaps - MAG 67 - PoV Agnes Montague
Keeps with the theme better here than in order with s2. Statement of cafe boy who tried to romance Agnes that one time
Are Things Still Burning - MAG 67/89 - PoV Agnes Montague
You’ll get it.
I’m Gonna Win - MAG 101 - PoV Gertrude or Michael
Really connect this song with gertrude’s Bad Bitch energy and MAG 101 is the episode where we really get a scope of how morally gray she is
But the overall cocky tone of the song is real good for Michael
The Distortionist - MAG 101 - PoV Michael
this ep is Michael’s statement. 
Its kind of hard to tell because of the vocaloid, but the song's character seems to have been pushed and  manipulated into something like Michael. I can see the song shifting from Michael singing about how Gertrude created him into accepting it and them singing at Jon
Has wayyyyy too much Spiral imagery to not include
Seven Devils - MAG111 - PoV Gerard Kaey
this is the ep where Gerard properly explains the fears to Jon
Dirty Night Clowns - MAG 104 - PoV Tim Stoker?
sort of Tim about his brother
Blood End Credits - no MAG/MAG 119 - PoV Tim Stoker
god i miss tim. I don’t think it translates exactly to 119, but it’s more of the climax of his character arch. He’s literally given everything to the Institute and to Elias and now he has to fucking die? FUck.  
Greatest Show Unearthed - MAG 139 - PoV Nikola/The Circus
This one is literal lol. u can figure it out
My Time - MAG 120/121 - Sung about Jon
*Mable pines picture* “He’s resting”
Who Are You, Really? - MAG 121 - Sung at/for Jon
Jon has to decide whether to let himself die human or risk becoming a monster to protect the people he loves*
*Martin
Cold Cold Man - MAG 124 - PoV Jon
This is the first time Jon and Martin have seen each other since he woke, and I think really the first time Jon has sought out Martin because he just...wanted to see him
Ruler of Everything - MAG 124 - PoV Martin
This is Martin’s side of the exchange he and Jon had. This is where he started pushing Jon away (Shot as wily one/only friend), and Peter is making him into the “ruler of everything” aka running the Institute, and just doing his best to go one day at a time until whatever Peter has planned gets done
Catabolic Seed - MAG 125 - PoV Melanie
Honestly, I just really wanted this song for melanie. The Magnus Institute is taking too much out of her, making her into a hollow, and she’s just trying to keep herself together with emotional duct tape
Body - MAG 131 Build Up - PoV Jon
I see this as the culmination of Jon’s survival guilt and desperation to make himself worthy of humanity again. Since he has a healing factor now, he has no sense of self-preservation and is willing to sacrifice his entire body to make himself worthy of humaity.
Skeleton Appreciation Day - MAG 131 - PoV Jared Hopworth
THE MEATBONE MANNNN
What Am I Becoming? - MAG 146/147 - PoV Jon
It hurts
in 146 Jon admited to Basira, Daisy, and Melanie confronted him about his live feedings. 147 Jon realises that he doesn’t want to stop feeding
Human - Mag 147/152 - For Jon
Couldn’t decide where this goes chronologically, but these in these two eps jon is seriously debating his humanity and disturbed that he even needs to do that 
Isle Unto Thyself - NA 
 this fits....somewhere in this season. I believe i see this as Jon singing about Martin’s isolation, but really its just applicable to their whole situation
Train Remastered - MAG 154 - PoV Jon
a fukn EASY one FINALLY. 
THis bitch is Jon asking Martin to blind himself with Jon so they can run away together. Their romantic arcs got me feeling all sorts of ways
No Eyed Girl - MAG 157
this is so literal lmao its just Melanie and Georgie
Not Human - MAG 158 - About Daisy
She’s spent so long serving the Hunt and trying to undo its power over her, and she really just Did That(tm) for her friends. We stan a werewolf queen
Monster - Many MAGs
honestly can fit Martin, Jon, Melanie and Daisy at different points, but i think its a good end to Daisy’s character arc currently
Ship In A Bottle - MAG 159 - About Martin and Peter
I like to see this as the climax of Martin’s Loneliness and his relationship with Peter as well as like the culmination of Peter’s deal with Elias and Martin’s Deal with Peter
It’s Alright - MAG 159 - To Jon and Martin
Jon Rescued Martin from the Lonely and is finally able to have a purpose and they are allowed to Be Okay
Honeybee - MAG 160 - PoV Jon
WE STAN TRUE LOVE AND SATISFYING ROMANCE IN THIS HOUSEEEEEEE
Great Vacation - Thematic transition
If Honeybee was the first 2 minutes of 160, then we know what’s coming next. The Scottish Cottage isn’t a vacation
Just Did A Bad Thing - MAG 160
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
Its the end of the world as we know it - Season 5 trailer
ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ
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possiblyimbiassed · 7 years ago
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What “stories” is Mary referring to?
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OK, of course, I see; that’s it – the stories. Conan Doyles’ amazing detective stories at the hands of our “Baker Street boys” have once again been interpreted into a new adaptation, this time played out in our own modern times. But it’s still about these wonderful stories; nothing else matters.
But wait – what ‘stories’ exactly do you refer to, Mary / AGRA / Rosamund / Gabrielle-or-whatever-your-name-is? Series 4 may have lots of Conan Doyle canon references, but why doesn’t it have a single coherent crime story? Not one!
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If the cases were that important, wouldn’t we be able to follow them as they unfold, basking in the brilliance of these fascinating adventures and their clever resolutions? Or at least be privy to some logical deductions and conclusions about them from the great detective Sherlock Holmes, narrated by his loyal friend Dr John Watson?
I think the ‘stories & adventures’ approach, in a traditional meaning, might be valid up until the beginning of Series 3, but then the coherent plot line gets abandoned in favour of a rather different content. Which means Mary’s words about ‘stories’ above may not be relevant. So – why not take a closer look at all of this show’s stories to see if they actually merit the name? I’ll go through all of them one by one since Series 1, focusing on the factual events in them, trying to evaluate their narrative interest as plot line and see where we end up in S4. I will try to not go into any personal issues for Sherlock Holmes or other characters – just the stories, as ‘objectively’ and free of Sentiment that I’m capable of. (And this is a monster post, so please bear with me).
For a start: A Study in Pink in Series 1 gives us the background where Holmes first meets former army doctor John Watson, whom he offers to be his flat mate. Watson moves in and Holmes takes him on their first ‘adventure’ -  a creepy crime story of a serial killer cabbie who ‘persuades’ his victims to commit suicide. His MO is to lure them into his cab, drive them to some remote location and threaten them to play Russian roulette with him by taking pills. Holmes helps the police (New Scotland Yard) with the case, but some of them distrust Holmes, and when he withholds a piece of evidence, they come to Holmes flat on a drug bust (finding nothing). Holmes does solve the case, however, and we are privy to his impressive deductions to get there; one of them involving the pink colour of a missing suitcase and another a desperate clue from a dying victim to find her murderer. Holmes gets in personal grave danger from the cabbie, but Watson saves him in the last moment by killing the culprit. Fair enough; I think this is a really good, intriguing detective story!
Next: In The Blind Banker Holmes and Watson get involved in a crime case with a mystic killer, who murders his victims in rooms locked from the inside (making it look like suicides). Cracking ciphers and codes and doing interesting deductions that we can follow, Holmes solves this one too, with some help from Watson. It turns out there’s a Chinese crime syndicate behind the murders, dealing with drugs and ancient stolen treasures, and a killer “spider man” who climbs buildings to execute their murders. Holmes, Watson and a third person get in serious trouble, but Watson saves the day in the culmination of the adventure. 
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Interesting story, I’d say (if it weren’t for the rather prejudiced depicting of Asian people, perhaps…)
Series 1 culminates with The Great Game, where a super-villain manages to get Holmes’ attention by wrapping his victims up in explosives (as if they were suicide bombers) and make the detective solve other crime puzzles to save their lives. Every puzzle is marked by a ‘pip’ on a mobile phone, five of them in total. Holmes solves all of them (among them a case of “national importance”, involving a stolen secret memory stick that his brother wants recovered for the government). At the end Watson is kidnapped and wrapped in explosives to threaten Holmes. He doesn’t defeat the super-villain, which makes for a nice cliffhanger. The stories are thrilling and exciting, and the deductions are made clear to the audience.
First out in Series 2 is A Scandal in Belgravia, where a ‘femme fatal’ Dominatrix is working on Holmes to deceive him through ‘Sentiment’. The case starts with Holmes’ mission to recover some compromising photos of a royal person from the Dominatrix’s locked camera phone. But it soon turns into a case where the government (and the CIA) is trying to lure international terrorists into a trap by sending up an aircraft full of dead corpses for them to blow up. The Dominatrix (who is actually working for the super-villain) is supposed to make Holmes crack the code to the governmental operation in order to warn the terrorists. Which he does, with an amazing deduction that ends in:
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She succeeds in this by getting his emotional attention, but Holmes defeats her in the end by breaking into her camera phone, and hands her secrets over to the government. In this episode Holmes also solves some other crime puzzles, some of which are told as mere fragments (if we want to know more about them, we can read John Watson’s blog).  The main narrative is a bit confused and convoluted, but I’d still say it’s a good, coherent story.
The Hounds of Baskerville is perhaps the story that is most similar to Doyle’s original. Holmes and Watson travel to Dartmoor to solve a case in which the young client Henry Knight thinks he’s going crazy. Henry believes a legendary gigantic hound was the killer of his father 20 years earlier (a crime he witnessed as a child), and he’s having creepy visions and sightings of this monster. Holmes suspects that the nearby top-secret military laboratory Baskerville is involved in the supposed appearances of the hound. Genetic cloning experiments with animals at Baskerville are suspected at first, but then Holmes concludes that the Hound is partly a figment of people’s imaginations. Henry Knight turns suicidal, but Holmes’ deductions save him in the last moment and the murderer who has been ‘gas-lighting’ Henry (a scientist at Baskerville) is revealed. When people’s sightings of a big, salvaged dog on the moor combines with the effect of a hallucinatory drug applied by aerosol, the result is the impression of a monster. Holmes’ deductions are presented for the audience to follow step-by-step, accompanying the plot line. This is a classical, fascinating detective story.
In The Reichenbach Fall the super-villain is back again, this time with an elaborate plan to disgrace Holmes and drive him to suicide. He starts by committing a series of sensational crimes and gets away with them in spite of overwhelming evidence, just because he can. His plans also involve poisoning children and make them fear the very sight of Sherlock Holmes. Holmes finds the kidnapped children through chemical lab analysis of their traces and clever deductions (which we can follow). But then Holmes get blamed for this crime and others, after the villain has influenced a tabloid scandal journalist. Four snipers are placed in Holmes’ neighbourhood, ready to kill Watson and two other of Holmes’ closest friends, unless he throws himself from a rooftop.
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The villain shoots himself in the head, but this only permanents the sniper threat; Holmes has to jump. At the end of the episode, the audience knows that Holmes must have faked his death and somehow survived the fall, but we’re left to figure out how. The story line is thrilling, coherent and easy to follow.
Series 3 and The Empty Hearse starts with an explanation of how Holmes survived “The Fall”. This, however, is where the plot line starts to derail and lose credibility. We never get to know the real events of Holmes’ fall, but are introduced to a Holmesian Fandom within the series, with their respective versions of how the detective survived, one of them more outrageous than the other.  Holmes, who has spent two years traveling around to dismantle the super-villain’s network, is captured and tortured by Serbian criminals wearing WWII Red Army uniforms. When he gets back to London, however, he doesn’t seem to be the least bothered by his wounds. He gets involved in a case concerning a skeleton and a book by Jack the Ripper, which turns out to be a fake crime arranged by a former police officer (same guy who accused Holmes of being a fraud in the previous episode; what was his motive?).
Watson, who is reluctant to forgive Holmes for having played dead, gets drugged, kidnapped and tied up in a bonfire (we aren’t told by whom), but Holmes finds out where he is kept (through cracking a skip code), and sets off to rescue Watson. The main story about a planned terrorist attack on London is sketchy, to say the least (I’m afraid reality vastly surpasses BBC Sherlock fiction when it comes to terrorist attacks). We are allowed to follow some of Holmes’ deductions to locate a bomb in the subway, but several plot holes become evident: When did Holmes call the police?
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Why did Holmes and Watson go down in the subway to diffuse a bomb with their bare hands? Why did the bomb have an off-switch, when no-one was supposed to be there when it exploded? Which organization was behind the attack? What were their motives? The plot seems secondary in this episode!
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The Sign of Three focuses entirely on Watson’s wedding, and Holmes - who hates social gatherings - abandons his work in favor of a full-time commitment to plan the reception, down to the tiniest details of table decorations and who is to sit together with whom. None of these details turns out to be relevant to the story, however (plot-wise: WTF?). We’re now told in Holmes’ best man speech that his and Watson’s adventures are “frankly ridiculous”.
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We do see flashes of cases to entertain the guests, but the only more or less coherent case happens on the wedding reception. Most deductions now take place inside Holmes’ head - his so-called Mind Palace. It turns out that the wedding photographer tried to murder one of the guests by stabbing him in the waist from his backside with a thin blade, while rehearsing for a group photo. The victim is supposed to not have noticed the stabbing until he took off his uniform belt (WTF?). When the victim is informed of this he threatens to commit suicide by removing his belt, which Holmes manages to talk him out of, so Watson can give him medical treatment. The photographer is captured; Holmes makes one more deduction about Watson’s wife being pregnant (which none of the parents are aware of?) and leaves the party early.
His Last Vow is the series final and plot-wise the most problematic episode, many times crossing the border of credibility. I’d definitely call this “frankly ridiculous”; it seems to contain more plot holes than a Swiss cheese and the kind of fantastic exaggerations one might expect from someone high on drugs.
Holmes is engaged in a blackmail case, involving prominent members of the government. The blackmailer is a powerful media magnate. Watson and his wife go to a drug den to rescue their neighbour’s son, where Watson also finds Holmes lying on a mattress. They take him to a hospital lab to test his blood for drugs. Holmes claims his drug use is for the blackmail case, which his friends dismiss. Members of Holmes’ fan club search his flat for drugs (sounds illegal to me), but find nothing. Later the blackmailer visits Holmes, intimidating him and showing him the letters he is using to put pressure on Holmes’ client. Holmes and Watson go to the blackmailer’s office later that night, to recover the letters. They manage to get through the security with help from the black-mailer’s PA, whom Holmes has a fake relationship with and fake-proposes to. (How she can buy this is an enigma, but that’s food for another meta).
Inside the office they find Holmes’ ‘fiancée’ unconscious on the floor. They smell a perfume that both Watson’s wife and Holmes’ client use. Holmes interrupts a scene where Watson’s wife is threatening the blackmailer at gunpoint. She turns out to be an assassin who is being blackmailed, but when Holmes offers help she turns the gun on him and shoots him in the chest.
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In a matter of seconds, Holmes uses his Mind Palace to try to find advice on how to survive the gunshot. Watson finds him, takes him to hospital and Holmes ‘flat-lines’ on the operation table, but somehow he manages to restart his own heart (?). We then see Watson’s wife entering Holmes’ hospital room, threatening him to keep quiet. Later the ‘fiancée’ (already fully recovered from the blow to her head that rendered her unconscious), visits Holmes, fiddles with his IV morphine and shows him how she, as revenge for his fake proposal, is selling stories about their supposedly intensive sex life to the tabloid press (why would fame as a sex-god be a punishment?)
Somehow, shortly after this, the seriously injured and recently operated Holmes manages to flee the hospital room and arrange a whole scene of revelation to Watson. He escapes through the window, buys a bottle of perfume, travels to Baker Street, moves back Watson’s heavy chair, places the perfume beside it as a clue and calls Watson at the same time he discovers the clue. Together with Doctor Watson (who apparently is OK with Holmes leaving hospital) he travels to the fake houses of Leinster Gardens and arranges a set-up for Watson’s wife, involving her highly enlarged wedding photo projected on the walls. Not bad for a man recently shot in the chest, is it? ;)
When she arrives, she (unknowingly) reveals in front of Watson that she shot his best friend, having no remorse about it. Holmes orders them back to Baker Street to “sort it out quickly”, because they “have work to do” (what work?).  
Oh dear storyteller, what did you take? Did you make a list? Anyway, the ‘story’ continues at Baker Street: Holmes is crumpling from pain, but there are no painkillers. Doctor Watson throws a tantrum and threatens his injured friend. Holmes makes excuses for his killer with some of the most ridiculous ‘deductions’ I’ve seen in the whole show. Then the meddlesome bastard (sorry, couldn’t resist – Sentiment got the better of me), before being taken back to hospital in an ambulance, goads Watson to trust his assassin wife claiming that she saved his life, at the same time as he accuses Watson of being attracted to this sort of people. The timeline jumps backwards and forwards between this scene and Christmas at the Holmes family House where Watson reconciles with his wife, while claiming that he doesn’t want to know who she really is an burns the memory stick she has given him with this info.
For the first time in the show, Holmes utterly fails to solve a case, leading to the suicide of his client’s blackmailed husband. Holmes and Watson go to the blackmailer’s luxury house to make a deal for Watson’s wife, but when things don’t go as he had planned, Holmes shoots the blackmailer in the head. (Where are his clever deductions to solve a tricky case? Since when is Holmes a murderer? Where is the coherence of this story? I’m loosing track here). The episode ends with Holmes being sent away on a private jet to a suicide mission in Eastern Europe, but he is immediately called back when the dead super-villains face is suddenly projected on every TV screen in the country.
The Abominable Bride is called a “Special” episode, since it mostly takes place in a Victorian setting inside Sherlock Holmes’ head. He re-plays his first meeting with Watson in the Victorian environment, and then starts to solve crimes involving a murderous bride who fakes her own suicide and re-appears as a ghost.
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There’s also a conspiracy of women in hoods, having some sort of cult connected to the ghost bride, in a desanctified church. The dead super-villain shows up trice, challenging Holmes and drawing his attention to the fact that he’s dreaming. On two occasions Holmes seems to wake up on the private jet after severely overdosing drugs, met by Watson, his wife and Holmes’ brother. But they never really take him to hospital, and when the episode ends Holmes is still in the Victorian setting. All in all, the plot line’s total lack of coherence and logics is fully explained by it all happening in a drug-induced, dreamlike state inside Holmes’ head. So even if the actual story is missing here, I find this episode far more ‘logical’ than HLV.
The Six Thatchers marks the start of Series 4, and the plot lines (there are more than one) are bizarre, to say the least. In fact, it’s so weird and illogical that I would definitely not call this a ‘coherent story’.
First of all we see how the government covers up the fact that Holmes now is a murderer, supposedly so he can work on the case of the super-villain’s return with top priority. But he never solves anything about the super-villain; this whole plotline seems to just vanish!
Instead, there’s this other case where the corpse of a young man is found when his car explodes, having been dead for a week. Holmes explains to the shocked parents that the boy had disguised himself as a car seat, as a practical joke on his father’s birthday, when he suddenly had some sort of fit and died on the spot. Holmes’ deductions seems like wild speculation with next to no evidence. Why would this guy go to the trouble of finding a vinyl car seat disguise (where do you get such a thing by the way?) to surprise his father, when he could easily just have hidden in the dark of the back seat? And how likely is it that in this precise moment, he would have ‘some sort of fit’? But suddenly Holmes’ ‘prickling of thumbs’ are valid, rather than his hallmark logical methods.
At first the other plot line is similar to Arthur Conan Doyle’s story The Six Napoleons: Six plaster busts of Thatcher are smashed, the owners have the same names as ACD gave them, one person is murdered and Watson is suggesting that the culprit has an idée fixe. However, instead of discovering the precious Pearl of the Borgias in one bust, which was the canon case and what Holmes also expects this time, we end up with – a memory stick about Watson’s wife and her gang of assassins? The culprit of the smashings is another member, and he accuses Watson’s wife of treason in an earlier operation when they worked for the government. When Holmes meets up with her for an explanation, she drugs him with some sort of dust from a letter, which he deliberately sniffs on, and she disappears.
Then we follow Watson’s wife on her escape through many countries under several aliases. At one point she knocks out (kills?) a stewardess and steels her identity. When Holmes and Watson find her in Morocco (through a tracker on her memory stick) everything is forgiven without discussion, and Holmes swears to protect her. Instead of Watson’s wife, Holmes accuses a member of the government of treason.
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But he is wrong (again) and the traitor turns out to be a governmental secretary, who also tries to shoot Holmes. Seeing this, Watson’s wife somehow manages to move faster than the bullet (??) and takes it for him. In a long speech, with a bleeding wound in her abdomen, she declares her eternal love for her husband and, for the first time, apologizes for shooting Holmes. Then she dies. For some odd reason Watson blames Holmes for her death, and cuts all contact with his best friend. But John’s wife leaves behind a recorded DVD with a strange message where she tells Holmes to go to hell to save John Watson.
In The Lying Detective many elements are taken directly from Conan Doyle’s The Dying Detective: Mrs Hudson seeks out Watson to tell him that Holmes is in a very bad shape. We then see him in a haggard state, babbling deliriously, and we learn, along with Watson, that Holmes is dying.
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This picture of Watson looking at Holmes’ hospital bed...
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...fits nicely with this quote from ACD canon: “I had stood for some minutes looking at the silent figure in the bed”.
Holmes then lures the criminal, Culverton Smith, to confess that he is trying to kill Holmes. At the end of the story, Holmes takes Watson out for dinner (“cake” in TLD).  
However, while Conan Doyle’s version is a perfectly coherent crime story, TLD is not. Doyle has Holmes explain the actual crime case: the murder of Smith’s nephew Victor Savage. Holmes has figured out that Smith killed Savage by poisoning him with a mortal disease. Holmes’ disguise is just a setup to make Smith confess, while gloating over both Savages’ and Holmes’ death.
On the other hand, in TLD, Holmes claims that Smith is a serial killer; he calls him “the most dangerous, the most despicable human being that I have ever encountered” and he shoots pictures of Smith on the walls of 221B. But who did this ‘monster’ kill? We don’t get to know about a single victim! Lestrade seems nauseated when Smith keeps confessing, but we never, ever get to know what the man has actually done. The only killing in TLD is instigated by Holmes himself; Holmes has told Smith that he wants Smith to kill him. And Holmes’ purpose with this is to make Smith confess that he is trying to kill Holmes. Redundant, isn’t it? What kind of ‘crime story’ is this? Holmes later tells Watson in TLD that the recording device he has used (hidden in Watson’s cane) qualifies as “entrapment”, which invalidates the confession. But since Smith supposedly has kept confessing other crimes (which we aren’t privy to) that’s enough to have him arrested. In canon Watson serves as a witness to the confession of the Savage murder, which is just what is needed to get Smith arrested. But in TLD Watson comes to rescue Holmes from a self-inflicted attack - in other words: Holmes’ suicide attempt.
In general, the other plot lines of TLD are even more ridiculous than in T6T, and the episode is perforated with plot holes that are never explained. Which is why I prefer to present them as questions below:
Why is Euros Holmes (Sherlock’s hitherto unknown sister) disguised as her brother’s suicidal client who walks the streets of London with him, only to suddenly leave him alone? Why does she fake being suicidal in the first place?  Why has she disguised herself as Watson’s new therapist? Why does she want to capture Watson?
Why is Watson haunted by a ghost of his deceased wife? Why so much focus on Watson’s wife in general, even when it doesn’t move the plot forward in any sense? 
If Mrs Hudson were worried about Holmes’ health, why would she put him handcuffed in the boot of a car and drive like crazy? And why would the guys from the café drop Holmes twice “because they know you”? 
Why would Molly Hooper bring an ambulance when going to examine a patient? Since when does she even do medical consulting; isn’t her expertise post mortem? And after her diagnosis that her patient is dying; why don’t they take him to hospital to help him rather than having him answer questions to a bunch of kids?
Since when does Watson do deductions (here in the form of his dead wife in his head doing deductions) to figure out how Holmes does deductions to predict Watson’s future plans? Couldn’t Watson otherwise just – I don’t know – plan them? And how the heck can Holmes predict future events involving actions of various people in detail and with an exact timing?
What happened with TD12, the memory-altering drug; weren’t they actually going to use this plot device? 
How can Watson assault Holmes, beat him to a pulp, be captured by the hospital staff, but then it’s suddenly said that Holmes has made a mess of himself? 
How can DI Lestrade know about Holmes shooting the blackmailer in HLV, when that was supposed to be highly classified information?
Sorry Mary, but I can’t see even the trace of an actual story or adventure here, since none of all these questions is answered satisfactory. And the characters are so distorted, compared to how we know them from before, that the plot line gets extremely confusing.
The Final Problem is presented as if it was the last episode of BBC Sherlock, but this is never actually confirmed by the writers.  As for the plot line, it’s so ridiculously convoluted, surrealistic and inconsequent that I simply refuse to call it a “story” at all; it’s much more similar to a nightmare.
When Holmes has learnt about Euros - his hitherto unknown sister - he sets up some sort of horror theatre with clowns, bleeding portraits and other tricks to scare his brother into telling him the truth.  
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We learn that Sherlock Holmes’ brother Mycroft as a teenager took to incarcerate their mentally ill sister in Sherrinford - an isolated, top-secret fortress out in the sea. Their parents thought she was dead (never investigated?) and Holmes has, strangely, forgotten all about her. While Mycroft is telling Holmes and Watson this in 221B, a drone flies in with a patience grenade that will explode if anything in its surroundings moves. Holmes and Watson jump out of the second floor window as the apartment blows up, but we never see them land on the pavement below. Instead they suddenly appear - without a scratch - on a fishing boat heading for Sherrinford. They highjack the boat, claiming they are pirates and, together with Mycroft, sneak into the fortress in disguises.
Pretty soon it gets clear that the dangerously intelligent Euros has taken over the fortress and manipulates people into doing her bidding. The persons Holmes and Watson have met as “Faith”, “E” and John’s new therapist are all one and the same person; Euros in disguise. Euros starts to perform a series of cruel experiments on Watson and the Holmes brothers. First she tries to force one of them to kill the governor of Sherrinford, threatening to kill his wife otherwise. When none of them can do this, the governor shoots himself, and then Euros kills his wife anyway. Next she shows them three men, bound and dangling from a cliff. She forces Sherlock to figure out who of them is guilty of murder, but when he obeys she kills all three. In the next experiment Euros has Sherlock phone Molly Hooper and make her say “I love you” to him – otherwise her flat will be blown up.  But Molly doesn’t know this, and before declaring to Sherlock, she makes him say the same thing to her. Sherlock thinks he has won this one, but Euros claims that he has only managed to hurt Molly (who is in unrequited love with Sherlock).
All the time at Sherrinford, Holmes has somehow been in voice contact with a frightened little girl who is on-board a jet plane in the air, full of sleeping adults (including the pilot). He tries to get information from this girl, but their communication is constantly interrupted by Euros.
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In the fourth experiment Sherlock has to choose between killing either Watson or Mycroft. Instead he chooses to shoot himself, but Euros stops him with a tranquilizer arrow. He sinks into a black liquid and wakes up in a room, which turns out to be a wooden box with walls that fall apart, and he ends up outside his old family manor. He can somehow hear Watson, who is chained at the bottom of a well, telling him that the water is rising. At the same time Euros’ voice presents the fifth experiment: he has to solve a puzzle to save Watson from the well. Once he manages it, he finds Euros in a room of the old house; it turns out she was the little girl on the plane (and now there is no plane anymore). Sherlock hugs her and tells her it’s all right, and then he finds Watson and rescues him with a rope (which is strange considering the chains). The police come and take Euros back to Sherrinford, where she stops communicating with people, except Sherlock, who plays violin in duet with her when visiting.
The series ends with 221B being rebuilt, Holmes and Watson solving cases (which we aren’t privy to) and a strange voice-over from Watson’s wife, who has sent a posthumous message to them on a DVD (see the beginning of this monster-post).
While these events in TFP are technically crimes, I wouldn’t call them ‘detective stories’ or ‘adventures’ because a) No actual motive is presented for any of the cases other than that Euros ‘wanted to play’; her actions are completely illogical, and b) They are too surrealistic to be even plausible in real life and c) There are no satisfactory solutions to the ‘crime cases’, except for the last one.
I can’t for the life of me believe that the twisted fairy tales of S4 are meant to be some sort of detective stories. If I try to take Series 4 at face value, I can’t find any kind of narrative quality that even resembles ACD’s legendary Sherlock Holmes adventures. So what is ‘Mary’ actually talking about?  What stories?? 
The impression I do get is that in Series 4 the authors are trying very hard to tell us something through subtext. The only way I can make sense of it is interpreting it as something very different than a story; Sentiment, dream logics and a continuation of Sherlock’s drug-induced imaginations in TAB.
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butteredonions · 8 years ago
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Listen. Listen. I got an amazing Voltron AU headcanon idea for you but you CAN'T GO RUNNING WITH IT MISS ONIONS I KNOW HOW YOU DO THINGS. From me to you: a Star Wars AU.
Predictably………..this is the longest one.
THANKS, ANDY.(I SCREAMED when this showed up in my inbox. Thank you for this gift, my friend. I hope you enjoy.)
(As a thank you to my followers for 100+, I took a handful of AU prompts in celebration! Prompts are quite closed, and I’m proud to present the culminating and final piece of this milestone series. Thank you all for choosing me on your dash!)
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00. Lance has wanted to be a Jedi his entire life.
It’s his deepest, most sincere and heartfelt desire.
A Jedi is belonging.
A Jedi has purpose, a path and a place in life. A Jedi looks after others; a Jedi takes care of people. A Jedi is a protector of the galaxy. It’s a longing and a calling Lance has always aspired to.
A Jedi is great, and a Jedi is kind. A Jedi is a keeper of the peace. A Jedi has the Force, wide open and beckoning, bright and true. Lance has loved the Force and the Light for as long as he can remember.
A Jedi looks out for others. A Jedi looks outs for their own.
A Jedi belongs.
Lance is going to be a Jedi.
Little Lance, a handful of years old and toddling on tiptoes in the creche, pudgy face smushed against the transparisteel of the creche window. Stubby fingers leave messy prints, watching all the ships come and go in the distant hustle and bustle of Coruscant night traffic. That’ll be me someday.
Little Lance, older, peeking out from amongst his crechemates as they travel the halls. He watches the robes of the great Jedi Knights swishing about their ankles, Padawans rushing to catch up. That’ll be me someday.
Little Lance, sneaking out to the Temple Gardens late at night to watch the waterfall play, closing his eyes and listening to the Force gurgle over rocks, splash onto stones. The soft breeze of the Force through the grass, the flowers, the trees. The Force is everywhere. A pair of Jedi sit in the grass nearby, quiet, heads bowed in meditation. The Force swirls around them gently, a stream in its own right. Lance hides by his waterfall and observes, content. That’ll be me someday.
Lance, even older. Finally a Padawan himself, following at the heels of his Master as they head down to the hangars for their first mission assignment. Looking over his shoulder at all the other Jedi embarking on ships, returning from missions of their own. A hub of galactic peace, in and out, busy keeping the galaxy safe.
That’ll be me someday.
Lance, at the conclusion of his Trials.
Jedi protect.
Jedi belong.
Lance is going to be a Jedi.
01. Lance and Hunk have been best friends since the days of the creche.
“Are we getting anywhere?” Lance asks, leaning on the engine. The sleeve of his robe swings down and nearly smacks Hunk in the face.
“Watch it!” Hunk warns. He’s cross-legged in front of the ship’s engine, the door to its innards wide open and waiting. Larger parts are scattered on the floor next to him, a handful of tiny pieces suspended carefully in midair by his shoulder. They dart out of range of Lance’s robe; Hunk bats Lance’s sleeve aside and calls them back, floating them neatly within reach. “Lance!”
“Sorry.” Lance shifts appropriately, pulling the billowing fabric of his sleeves up and resting on them like a pillow. The engine malfunctioned a few systems back; Hunk’d pulled them out of hyperspace before any real damage could be done. They’re parked on some quiet little forest moon out here in the middle of nowhere while Hunk works his mechanical magic. “What’s the prognosis, doc?”
“I think I can do it,” Hunk says. He frowns and reaches in; the Force hums bright and content as Hunk tugs on something inside the machine. “Just need to - oh, come on.”
“Need a hand?” Lance offers.
Hunk shakes his head. “Not one of yours. Did you comm the Council?”
“Did,” Lance confirms. Hunk grunts an affirmation and sticks his head into the engine entirely. The bang of a wrench on metal floats out; Lance pitches his voice louder. “They can send a ship to pick us up if we need it, but it’ll be a while. The only other team out here in this quadrant of the Mid Rim right now is delayed.”
“Delayed?” Hunk asks, ducking out. “Can you pass me the hydrospanner?”
Lance waves his fingers. The Force responds easily to his call, lifting the appropriate tool and dropping it into Hunk’s waiting palm.
“Thanks,” Hunk says, ducking back in. His voice echoes from inside. “Who’s delayed? Do they need a pick-up instead?”
Lance shrugs, shifting his feet closer. “I asked, but the Council said no. Just something about ‘negotiations’ taking longer than anticipated.”
“Guess we’re not the only ones having trouble,” Hunk mutters. Something clatters inside the engine with him. He swears. “This is the last time we borrow a ship!”
“Excuse you, this ship’s doing great,” Lance croons, patting the broken engine fondly. “Aren’t you, girl?”
“Sorry. I’ll be clearer,” Hunk says. Lance can almost hear his eyes rolling. “This is the last time you get to borrow a ship without me checking her over.”
“Hey!” Lance squawks. Hunk laughs, his chuckles echoing. “Blue’s a good ship!”
“Did you name her?” Hunk asks, pulling his head out. His hair’s somewhat mussed above his standard ribbon. “She’s tan and green, Lance. There���s nothing blue about this ship.”
“She feels blue,” Lance coos, rubbing his knuckles affectionately over the busted metal. “Don’t you, my beautiful friend?”
“You’re unbelievable,” Hunk says, as if he’s even surprised. Lance grins. With a simple wave of Hunk’s hand three of the little pieces floating in midair drop down; Hunk catches them, squinting back into the engine. “And you get to explain this one to the Council, by the way. ‘Hey, where’s the ship you guys left with? Why’d you come back in that old thing?’”
Lance gasps. “She’s not old! She was a gift! Queen Luxia was grateful!”
“And also because ours was wrecked, no thanks to a giant serpent water-demon-thing that someone decided we had to awaken,” Hunk says. “Next time I tell you I have a bad feeling, listen to me.”
“It worked out in the end,” Lance protests, flopping down to sit by Hunk’s shoulder.
“It did,” Hunk agrees, “But next time, listen. Unless you want to be held captive by weird mermaid girls again.”
Lance pouts. “I thought they were nice.”
“Because they were flirting with you, Lance,” Hunk says patiently.
“What’s it like to get premonitions?” Lance wheedles instead, folding his legs underneath him. Lance is well-trained in many regards: he can fly almost any kind of ship, he’s super good with a lightsaber, and he’s awesome at negotiations (if he does say so himself). His training’s been thorough; Lance is proud to use the Force like he does. There’s a freedom there, a safety and a surety in the Light that Lance has never found anywhere else.
For all that he loves it, however, the Force has never seen fit to send Lance even the tiniest glimpse of the future. Which, considering how bent-out-of-shape Force Visions sometimes make Hunk, Lance doesn’t mind in the slightest.
“They’re useless, when your best friend won’t listen to you,” Hunk says.
Lance groans, flopping sideways. “Hunk!”
“Kidding,” Hunk says, grinning. The remaining two pieces floating in midair float gently into his hand. “Kind of kidding. If you’re going to sit there, you can be useful. Hold these, I need to concentrate.”
“So demanding,” Lance pouts, but scoots closer to help anyway.
02. Lance has looked up to Shiro for as long as he can remember.
Which is probably why this moment is absolutely, horrifically, entirely embarrassing.
Or it would be, if Lance was more than semi-conscious.
The Force inhibitor they injected him with - whoever they are, Lance can barely remember the species’ name - is still running through his veins, making his thoughts slick and stupid. His thoughts slowly tumble over one another when he tries to grab them, tries to slot them into any reasonable semblance of order or logic. The Force eludes him, its absence sickening and gone. Normally it flows through him like water, beautiful and strong, but now he can’t…he can’t…it’s like drifting through a terrible fog.
He’s not entirely sure how long he’s been here. A few hours? Days? Everything’s a bit of a blur. There’s the fog between him and the Force; Lance tries to reach through it, strains out for anything, but there’s nothing. His thoughts are oil, thick and slippery. There’s the hard surface he’s lying on; there’s a distant spark of pain burning in the back of his head, maybe. The lights are too bright and hurt, especially around the door, where it’s extra sparkly and red-hot shiny for some reason. They could at least have turned off the light. Maybe that way he’d actually get some sleep.
Wait.
Extra…red-hot?
What the -  
The door blows open. Part of it falls away in an explosion of metal and flames, letting in a burst of blinding light from the hall. A figure stands in the now wide-open, smoking doorframe, backlit like a rescuing, vengeful angel.
Huh.
“Lance?” says the angel.
“Hunk, I told you to go,” Lance says. Or tries to. The words trip over his tongue, thick and clumsy. All he gets out is some kind of whine vaguely shaped in the sound of “Hun’, I’oldu…”
“Lance,” the voice repeats, urgently. Lance forces his eyes open again. Someone’s bending down over him, blocking out the light from the hall and the stupid bulb overhead. Their face swims in and out of focus; dark hair, closely shaven to the sides except for a tuft in front. Strong nose. Worried grey eyes. What?
“Lance,” Shiro repeats. He leans closer; his hand’s on Lance’s cheek. The tiniest trickle of the Force hums in at his fingertips. It’s warm. For just an instant the headache’s gone. Lance’s eyes flutter closed. “Lance, can you hear me?”
“That’s me,” Lance mumbles. Definitely doesn’t make any sound related to “szat’smmborf.”
“Lance?”
“Uh-hmm,” Lance says, eloquently. He might actually just groan.
Shiro’s entire face softens into something more affectionate, more fond. “They got you good, huh, buddy. Can you walk?”
“Of course I can,” Lance says. Or means to. It definitely doesn’t come out like “‘fcurschmaumble.”
“Going to take that as a no,” Shiro says, and kriff, is he smiling? Lance can’t make his eyes focus, but Shiro’s voice definitely has a smile in it. Kriffing hell. “C’mon, up you go. We have to get out of here.”
He slings Lance over his shoulder like Lance is nothing more than a sack of potatoes, and carries him bodily, just like that, out the door.
Lance tries to keep track of their passage as they go, but it’s hard with his vision wavering in and out like this. They’re underground, judging by the path Shiro’s taking. Lance doesn’t remember these halls whatsoever. The last thing he remembers is -
“Hunnnghk,” he groans against Shiro’s shoulder.
“Hunk’s fine,” Shiro says. A tendril of Force wraps around Lance’s headache again, tugging, easing. Lance can’t help his sigh of relief. “Commed for help and we came. You doing alright?”
“Mm’fnn,” Lance manages. He swallows. “‘m fine. You - wha -?”
“We were closest,” Shiro explains. He’s supporting Lance easily with his left hand, clipping his lightsaber to his belt briefly with the fingertips of his right. “Council sent us, but we would’ve come anyway. Keep breathing, Lance. You’re doing fine.”
Uhhh. “ ‘Wh’e’?”
“We,” Shiro confirms, pulling out his commlink and speaking into it. “Guys, what’s your ETA?”
“We can meet you in the hangar in three minutes,” comes the reply. Lance frowns - or tries to. It’s more of an uncoordinated twitch of his facial muscles than anything. He knows that voice.
“Wait,” Lance struggles to say. Who’d Shiro come with?
Shiro ignores him. Lance probably would too if their positions were reversed.
“Do you have him?” the commlink asks.
“Affirmative,” Shiro says.  “He’s - “
Shiro stops suddenly, feet skidding on the stone floor. Lance struggles to raise his head. He can’t manage that, either.
“Halt,” orders a mechanical, tinny voice. “Hands up, Jedi!”
Kriffing.
“How did you end up on a planet with battle droids?” Shiro asks Lance, incredulously.
“They didn’t say they had battle droids when they asked for aid,” Lance tries to explain. Approximately three of the words make it out (“th’y ddn’sulgheshemm”). He gives up.
The comm squawks a burst of static. “Shiro? Shiro, are you there? What’s happening?”
“Hands up, Jedi!” The droids command. “Don’t move!”
“Minor delay,” Shiro confirms to the commlink. His voice is thoughtful, and almost…amused? “We’ll meet you in the hangar momentarily.”
Metal feet clack against the floor. Lance still can’t see with his face flopped into Shiro’s shoulder. “We said, hands up!”
Shiro’s shoulder shifts under Lance’s midsection. “Lance, buddy. I’m going to need to set you down for a minute.”
“My ‘saber,” Lance groans, with a supreme effort of will. “I’ca fight.”
“I have that, and no, you can’t,” Shiro says, still with that amused lilt in his voice.
The determined click of blasters interrupts him. “Don’t move!”
“I’m just putting my friend down,” Shiro says, deliberately slow. “He’s hurt.”
“I can fight,” Lance tries, one last time, as he’s gently slid off Shiro’s shoulder. Shiro sets him carefully down in an alcove in the wall, cupping the back of Lance’s head to make sure he doesn’t jar it further. Lance slides down the wall bonelessly, unable to so much as lift his head once Shiro pulls his hand away.
“Surrender!” the droids order.
“Mm,” Shiro says. He drops something into Lance’s limp palm: the commlink.
“Shiro,” Lance croaks, as Shiro stands.
“Rest,” Shiro tells him. “We’ll be out of here in two minutes.”
Even with his blurry vision, Lance can just make out the determined glint in Shiro’s eyes, steady and firm above a scarless face, one single thick streak of white in the otherwise perfect set of bangs. How Shiro got that white streak is legendary.
As is Shiro, the youngest Jedi Knight in six centuries.
“Last warning,” the droids command. “Surrender or be destroyed!”
“Not doing that,” Shiro says easily, and in one smooth motion calls his lightsaber to his right hand and ignites it.
The greatest regret of the mission, Lance thinks, is not being captured in the first place. It’s not the loss of the Force, thanks to the inhibitor drug still coursing through his veins. It’s not even that Hunk and his bad-feeling-number-twelve were right.
No. Lance’s greatest regret is that he passes out before he can watch Shiro single-handedly take down six battle-droids, armed only with a lightsaber and the strongest, most unwavering trust in the Force that Lance has ever seen.
Lance is never going to live this one down.
03. Scratch that, scratch all of that: the greatest regret of the entire mission failure is that being rescued by Shiro also means being rescued by Keith.
Lance comes to because people are yelling.
“Everyone on?” bellows a voice from afar, sharp syllables brash and blunt. Lance knows that voice. Aw, hell, he knows that voice.
“Go, Keith!” Shiro shouts. He’s carrying Lance again, slung over his shoulder. Did early promotion to Jedi Knight come at a total loss of any basic field first aid?
“What happened?!” says a blessed voice rushing towards him - oh, that’s Hunk, oh thank the Force, that’s Hunk. Relief surges through Lance’s chest.
“Hunk,” he cries, stretching out a hand. Or tries to. The drugs mean he just moans and weakly flings his fingers into the fabric of Shiro’s hood.
A hand grasps his anyway, calloused and warm. “Is he okay?” Hunk asks, worry thick in his voice.
Before Shiro can answer the ship shakes, hard. Shiro staggers but somehow doesn’t drop Lance. Hunk yelps.
“You might want to buckle up!” Keith shouts, probably from the cockpit. Keith. Of all the terrible luck.
“‘m not letting Keith save me,” Lance groans, trying to kick his feet so Shiro’ll set him down. His feet don’t even twitch. “Put me back. No. No way.”
Surprising absolutely no one, only half of the syllables make it out. (“ ‘mnahleKeeeeef…”)
“You sure he’s alright?” Hunk asks, following in concern as Shiro carries Lance further into the ship. “He’s kind of out of it.”
“Understandable, after what they dosed him with,” Shiro says. His voice reaches Lance as if through a distant tube. The world tilts; something soft presses against his back. Shiro’s hand cradles the back of Lance’s head again, laying him down. Even so Lance’s entire world spins - he can just barely make out Shiro’s face still, and behind him, Hunk’s wide-eyed worry. He squeezes his eyes shut, miserable.
“Lance,” Shiro says. “You need to go into a healing trance, okay? It’ll do until we get back to Coruscant and can put you into bacta for your head. Can you go into a trance yourself, or do you need help?”
Oh hell no. Lance doesn’t need help with a healing trance. He’s the best at these. This is his chance. He’s totally got this.
He raises a hand to say so - maybe cock the trademark finger-guns in Shiro’s direction - but can’t actually get his hand more than a millimeter off the bunk. His fingers really just flop weakly against the medical mattress.
“Uh,” Lance groans.
“He needs help,” Hunk summarizes for him.
The ship shudders beneath them, harder. Hunk grabs for a hold; Shiro braces Lance against the bunk with one hand.
“Keith?” Shiro calls urgently.
“I got it, I got it,” Keith shouts back. The ship shakes again, harder. “Krithspit!”
“You got him?” Hunk asks. “I can man a cannon.”
Shiro nods. “Go.”
Hunk squeezes Lance’s hand and lets go, robe brushing Lance’s failing fingers as he leaves. Lance should say something  - total encouragement, maybe - but the words are stuck in the fog, lost in the slick of oil inside his head. The Force is still so far away it’s sickening. He hates this.
That comforting broad hand settles on his forehead, gentle and firm.
“Breathe,” Shiro suggests. The Force swirls under his palm of his right hand; his glove’s ripped, exposing bare skin. Lance can feel Shiro’s pulse through the contact, steady and strong. Shiro’s fingertips are warm as he brushes Lance’s sweaty hair away. “Let me help you.”
“You came for me,” Lance murmurs. It’s the easiest thing he’s managed to say all evening.
Shiro’s smile warms his voice, too. “Of course we did.” The Force presses, insistent, strong. It reaches out to Lance like tendrils of wind, brushing back the clouds trapped in Lance’s brain. Lance sighs, the fog drifting wisps at his corners.
“Breathe with me,” Shiro murmurs, and Lance does.
04. It’s not that Lance doesn’t like Keith, per se. It’s just that there’s all kinds of better, totally-valid-and-not-petty-at-all reasons not to (shut up, Hunk).
For one, Keith’s - prickly, or something. He’s super quiet. He’s never really said more than four words to Lance, even when they were assigned to a mission together back in the day. He’s curt and closed and Lance has definitely wiped that mission from his memory, thank you very much. Clearly they didn’t work well together or the Council would’ve tried again. Case closed.
Keith’s an excellent swordsman. He was the first one in their early classes to advance to the next form of lightsaber technique, always reaching, always going first and always outdoing Lance by a landslide. Even now it’s not uncommon for Lance to come back from a mission with Hunk, seek out one of the sparring bots, and find Keith’s set some new record or other. If Lance wasn’t an awesome Jedi who could release his anger into the Force and all, it’d be infuriating.
There’s also the fact that out of everyone in their age-group, Keith was picked first by a Jedi Master to be a Padawan.
He was picked first and he was picked early. And even though it’s been years, even though Lance did get chosen before his thirteenth birthday, even though that’s long past and now they’re all Jedi Knights anyway so it doesn’t even matter, it still….stings, sometimes. Just a little.
The other big reason to Not Like Keith is that Keith’s primary partner for field work just so happens to be Shiro.
Nine times out of ten they’re off together, completing missions with aplomb and speed and legendary success and blah, blah, blah. A dream team. Fine. Lance gets it; he has his preferred field partner, too. He wouldn’t trade Hunk for anybody. He certainly wouldn’t trade him for Keith.
Which is why when Hunk comes down with a nasty case of the Andorian flu the day before the Council summons arrives, Lance barely manages to hide his dismay.
“I can do it,” Hunk insists, but the very act of speaking sends him into an explosive fit of sneezing.
“You’re sick,” Lance says patiently, fluffing pillows. He’s helpfully fetched every pillow in their apartment, propping Hunk up and making sure his airway’s as unrestricted as possible. It’s a nasty bug, but all the meddroids can do for Hunk is administer the vaccine and wait for it to take effect. He hands Hunk another handkerchief, fresh from Lance’s stash - a habit he’d gotten into as a Padawan. “You stay here and rest. You good? You can reach the water from there, right?”
“Yes, Master,” Hunk mimics grumpily, already reading for a holopad. “Is this yours?”
“Yours,” Lance confirms. He’d tucked away all the ‘pads with anything remotely busy or stressful, like the Council’s latest mission request? Totally stressful. The only holopads left within Hunk’s reach are puzzle games, exotic cooking magazines, and that one interesting holo-opera Hunk claims he doesn’t like (but definitely does).
Hunk’ll figure it out eventually, maybe, but hopefully not before he falls asleep for at least a quick nap. Hunk’s supposed to rest, not worry about the mission details on the Council summons. Especially since there’s no way the vaccine will take hold fast enough for him to join Lance for it.
Lance is just going to have to work with a different partner for this one.
He rocks back and forth on his heels all the way up the turbo lift, all the way up to the Council chamber. Mostly it’s nerves. The last time he went out without Hunk, he’d had to do it with that weird Balmeran Rax, and that had been, uh…interesting. Less exciting than the time Lance got paired with that one Arusian, though - Lance doesn’t even remember her name, it’d been that bad. None of it even comes close to the disaster that was the Keith-mission.
Lance shudders. Maybe he’s cursed. Does the Force work that way? Maybe he needs Hunk in order to have a successful mission. Maybe he’s better off telling the Council to wait, to find someone else to do this “time-sensitive” whatever.
No. Lance is a Jedi, and as a Jedi he has a duty. He’s not shirking this because he’s nervous. Lance is skilled and strong; he’ll make a success of this no matter who his partner is. They won’t live up to Hunk, but that’s okay. Lance can work with anybody.
Unless it’s Keith.
…the Force can’t hate him that much.
The lift lets him off on the Council floor. The young attendant there waves him in.
“Ah, Lance,” says Master Coran, seated in his deep brown chair. The other Jedi Masters of the Council nod in greeting as Lance slips in through the door. “Good of you to come. How is Hunk?”
“Definitely got the sniffles, but on the mend,” Lance says, “This is about the mission, right? I can work with whoever - ”
He stops short, because he’s finally caught sight of the anomaly in the room. The other person summoned before the Council, standing in the middle of the Council chamber floor and, oh Force, oh no, smiling apologetically in his direction.
“Keith’s ankle is broken,” Shiro says, taking no notice of Lance’s open-mouthed bug-eyed Gungan-fish impression as his jaw meets the floor. “He’s down for the count as well. Mind if I join you?”
05. Lance has never met anyone with as much control over the Force as Shiro.
The Force has always whispered to Lance like water talks to trees. It’s easy to listen and easy to drink in. It guides his choices, rushes through him with significance, answers, a simple ebb and flow that’s deeply comforting. He’s certain the Force manifests itself to other people in other ways;  sometimes, in meditation or when he focuses hard enough, Lance can feel it. The Force swirls around Hunk, for example, as bright and warm as Lance’s own energies, welcoming and gentle as a sunbeam.
Shiro’s so steeped in it, so firmly grounded in Light, that he practically shines.
The Force ripples and sways around him, tender, attentive, little wisps of a waiting breeze. When Shiro calls on the Force to soothe ruffled feathers at the royal dinner on the planet they’re visiting, it’s so subtle Lance barely notices. When they’re nearly overtaken by the palace’s personal guards, insistent the ‘honored Jedi’ stay in their rooms and don’t go into the city, Shiro’s Force redirection of their attention is so gentle and firm that Lance has to fake a coughing fit so the guards won’t notice his squeal of glee.
When they discover the outlawed rebels on the edge of town, frightened but not cowed, it’s Shiro’s battle plan that regains the city - quick-thinking, clever, genius. Lance’s favorite part of the entire thing is standing on the eve of that battle, the moment when Shiro pulls his lightsaber out. The blue blade hums in the darkness as he tilts his head, whispers to Lance: “Can you swing in from the south? You’ll only have one shot.”
Fierce pride bubbles warm and expansive in Lance’s chest.
“Yeppp,” Lance smirks, and does.
Needless to say, the mission goes really, really well.
It’s not the last time Lance and Shiro partner up, either. Keith’s ankle takes time, which leads to Mission Two - and then even longer, as Keith tries to train too soon and makes everything worse (which Shiro reports with fond exasperation as he arrives for his and Lance’s Mission Three). Hunk takes a brief stint at teaching - basic ship repair while the primary Jedi-instructor is away - which gives Lance and Shiro Missions Four and Five.
And so on. It’s amazing. Shiro isn’t Hunk, of course, but - who is? For a substitute, Lance has to admit, Shiro’s not bad. Not bad at all.
(“And this isn’t an opinion tinged in hero-worship, of course not,” Hunk teases, when he and Lance are back in the field again.
“Shut up,” Lance says.)
One afternoon, back at the Jedi Temple after his and Shiro’s impromptu mission streak has ended, Lance goes up on a whim to ask if Shiro wants to spar. Shiro’d mentioned last time that he’d be happy to teach Lance some tricks - when they aren’t in as confined an area as a ship, or as tense an area as ‘peaceful’ negotiations - and Lance fully intends to take him up on it.
Shiro’s quarters are in the same section of the Jedi Temple as Lance’s, just a floor or so away. Lance bounds up and knocks on the door.
The door swishes open.
It isn’t Shiro.
Lance’s jaw drops. “Keith?”
“The hell?” Keith blurts, right back.
“Is that Lance?” Shiro asks, from further inside.
Unbelievable. Lance gapes, staring. “What are you doing here?”
“I live here,” Keith snaps. “What are you doing here?”
“You live here?!” Lance squawks. “But - “
“ ‘Living’ is a broad term when you’re hardly ever home,” Shiro says, finally in line of sight over Keith’s shoulder. He smiles. “Hi, Lance. What can I do for you?”
“Uh,” Lance says, still reeling. “Uh?”
“Unless you came for Keith?” Shiro asks politely, or it would be polite if not for the frankly mischievous glint in his eyes. Lance, seven missions in with Shiro, knows that glint.
“No!” he yelps, windmilling back. “Him?!”
“He’s just mad I saved his ass,” Keith says. He pulls away from the door to push around Shiro and back inside. “Twice.”
“Once!” Lance hollers at his retreating form. “Don’t remember the first. Doesn’t count!”
Shiro shakes his head, which he’s totally doing to hide the fact that he’s laughing. Traitor. “Quite the history. Keith, do you still need help with -“
“No,” comes the sullen call from within. A door slams.
“How did he manage to slam an automatic door,” Lance whispers.
Shiro rolls his eyes, amused. “Keith is a man of many talents. Come in, Lance; you’re welcome here. Ignore my rude roommate.”
He steps back, freeing the entry to his apartment. His and Keith’s apartment. Kriffing.
“I will if he will,” Lance declares, and steps inside.
06. The dream changes everything.
“They’ll expel you from the Jedi Order.”
Lance gasps; his head whips from side to side, struggling to catch a view of the speaker. No one is there. He’s alone in the middle of pitch darkness - no floor, no walls, no ceiling. Just black.
“Expel?” His voice echoes into the nothingness, hollow and distant. Cold fear swoops into his stomach. He can’t feel the Force. Lance takes a cautious step forward. “Expel - who? What’s going on?”
“Lance.”
Lance looks over his shoulder. Keith’s standing there, lit from the flickering lights unique only to the back corners of the temple hangars. A ship waits behind him, loading ramp down, landing lights humming. He is between the ship and Lance.
The hilt of a lightsaber rests in Keith’s hand, his fingers curled around the metal - no. He and Lance hold it, both their hands on it, Lance’s on top and Keith’s below. The lightsaber rests in the space between their palms.
Keith’s eyes burn.
“Don’t do this,” he says.
The room shifts. Lance reels with the abrupt curl of the hangar fading away. He’s standing in a hall, now, narrow and tight. The light overhead is cold and weak.
Shiro’s seated on a bench down the way, slumped over, elbows on knees and back bowed forward. He’s cradling his right wrist in his left hand - a wrist that shines as it catches the light. His palm, fingertips, and all the way up past his elbow is made of metal, silver and grey glinting in the weak light of the hall.
“I don’t know,” Shiro whispers, tired. Deep exhaustion’s settled under his eyes, in the harsh scar etched across his nose. The tuft of his hair has gone completely white.
A chill of alarm shivers down Lance’s spine. He steps forward. “Shiro?”
Shiro shakes his head, still staring at his hand.
“I couldn’t stop it,” he says.
“No,” Keith snaps, harsh and brutal. Lance spins towards the voice, but Keith isn’t looking at him. He’s not the same Keith from earlier; his Jedi robe is gone. He’s standing alone in the middle of a wide, cavernous room. Thin blue strips illuminate the cold rock walls and the hexagonal symbols rising from the floor. His lightsaber hums to life, the purple blade highlighting his face in stark shadows.
“I won’t quit,” Keith snarls, and lunges.
“Lance!”
Lance turns in alarm. Hunk’s staring at him - no. Hunk’s staring off into the distance, the dusk of an orange sky bright in his wide-eyed horror. A figure stands by his side, small and hidden in Hunk’s shadow. “Lance, don’t!”
“Hunk!” Lance cries, and starts forward -
It’s too late. The light of the sunset fades. Lance nearly slams right into Keith one final time, standing stock-still in the middle of the way.
“Keith?” Lance says. Keith’s back is to him, illuminated only in the light from one of the long Temple windows. The sun’s setting outside, too, but it’s dim and offers no warmth. “Keith, what’s going? Where are we?”
“The Council’s given up on him,” Keith says. Lance has never heard him like this, bitter and tired like an old bell. “They say he’s gone.”
“Who?” Lance insists. “Keith, what are you talking about?”
“Shiro’s my friend,” Keith says. He’s turned, staring down the hall towards a shadow Lance can’t see. His face is twisted, hard, and closed. “I’m not letting the Dark Side take him.”
“What’s wrong?” Hunk asks, when Lance bursts out into their shared little sitting room. He’s still up, tinkering with a droid. A holopad blinks open on the coffee table; parts of the droid are scattered all over, spanning nearly every available surface. It’s one of the reasons Hunk stays up later than Lance. He sets his tools aside, concern deep in his frown. “Lance?”
“I have to talk to Shiro,” Lance blurts. He’s half-dressed already, shoving his feet into boots. He doesn’t bother with the robe.
“Sure,” Hunk starts, easily. “Is this about - Lance, wait, Lance! Do you even know what time it is?!”
Lance doesn’t hear him. He’s already out the door and moving too fast to stop.
They’ll expel you from the Jedi Order.
I couldn’t stop it.
I’m not letting the Dark Side take him.
06. Lance doesn’t get premonitions.
06. Lance doesn’t get premonitions.
Through some stroke of luck, he finds Keith and Shiro down in one of the sparring rooms. The Force leads him there, pitter-pattering ahead of his heartstrings on silent feet. Lance pauses just in line of sight, just beyond the door.
They’re using their actual lightsabers, or at least Keith is. He’s stepping carefully and deliberately across the salle’s floor, the green blade of his lightsaber quick and burning sharp as he demonstrates a move for Shiro.
Green blade. Lance lets out a sigh of relief he didn’t know he’d been holding.
Inside, Shiro reaches to correct Keith’s grip, fingers tapping lightly on Keith’s wrist. Fingers. Flesh and blood. Real.
Real.
Lance ducks out of sight. He leans his head against the wall, breathing hard.
He doesn’t get premonitions. He doesn’t get any of this. The bad feelings, the visions? The future? That’s Hunk’s job. That’s not what Lance does.
This isn’t…
I couldn’t stop it.
Don’t do this.
This can’t be.
07. There’s only one person in the entire Jedi Order Lance trusts enough to help with this.
“I knew it,” Coran exclaims, slapping the tea canister down on the counter. “I knew it! Was this your first one? You haven’t had other dreams you’ve been hiding from me, have you? Have you?”
“What?” Lance blinks, pulling back. Coran’s right up in his face, squinting at him with one eye. “Uh, no? What - ”
“Your premonitions!” Coran exclaims, gesturing broadly with both gloved hands. He wiggles his fingers. “Your awakening.” He straightens, tugging proudly at the ends of his mustache. “And to think the others doubted me. Master Kolivan owes me fifty credits. That old scoundrel!”
Lance chokes. “What?!”
“Of course, he’s not around to collect it now, so that could prove a bit of a challenge,” Coran muses in agreement. He shrugs. “Ah, well. Patience comes to the faithful!”
“Were you,” Lance starts to ask. He can’t even - what the hell. “Were you betting on me?”
Coran’s eyes are shining, twinkling with pride. “I’d wondered if this little talent might find you someday.” He sniffs, pressing a hand dramatically to his chest. “Oh, I’m so proud!”
Lance buries his face in his hands. “You can stop any time, old man.”
“Nope, not now, I’ve been waiting years for this,” Coran declares, gleeful and giddy. “Sometimes this particular talent can turn up late, very late in life. This is later than usual, but I had a Hunch and the old Force hasn’t led me wrong yet.”
Enough’s enough. Lance groans, letting his forehead hit the table. “Do I always have to do things late?”
There’s a reassuring pat on top of his head.
“There, there, Padawan,” Coran says. He’s sombered a little, voice gentle. It takes Lance back immediately; some of the tension drops from his shoulders. “There’s no shame - ”
“- in taking your time,” Lance mutters with him, into the wood. “‘m not your Padawan anymore, Master.”
“You’ll always be my Padawan,” Coran says, fondly. He ruffles Lance’s hair one more time before pulling away. “Tea?”
“Maybe.”
Coran hums, still quite pleased, and busies himself with the tea preparations. Lance gives himself twenty more seconds of embarrassment before he sits up, rubbing at his forehead.
“Right,” Coran says, when the tea’s steeped. “Tell me more. You’re certain the lightsaber was purple?”
Lance nods. Coran pours. The tea streams into two mugs, steaming hot and a peaceful amber. “Not like - magenta purple, but darker. Almost blue.”
He can’t shake the images from his head. Keith’s determination in that empty room of rock, hard and fiercely desperate. Shiro slumped in the hall, the strength Lance admires and respects leeched from his shoulders.
I’m not letting the Dark Side take him.
“Here.” Coran slides a mug of tea to Lance, breaking him from his reverie. The busy traffic of Coruscant sails by the windows, far away in the distance. “Drink this. It’ll help.”
“It better not be that nunvil-flavored stuff,” Lance warns, reaching for the cup.
Coran waves his hand absently. “No, no, not for this. You haven’t had this one before.”
That’s never reassuring. Coran’s infamous even among the Council for his terrible taste in tea. Lance suffered through many an awful cup in his Apprenticeship.
…well, there’s always a chance. Lance takes a skeptical sniff.
The putrid scent of dying animal and burnt grass whiffs straight into his nostrils. Lance gags. “Coran!”
Coran chuckles. “Helps clear the old noggin. Take a sip, and then finish telling me about your vision.”
Vision.
Lance stills. A spark of fear lights under his ribcage; he struggles to release it into the Force, setting his cup down slowly. “So you think it’s real.”
“I think times are changing,” Coran says, carefully.
08. Time passes. Lance doesn’t have the dream again. Maybe it was a fluke.
The call comes, blinking urgent and frantic across the dashboard of their ship.
“That’s an emergency code,” Hunk says, frowning. “The frequency - ”
“I got it,” Lance says. He taps open the channel immediately, cocking an eyebrow at the comms. “Lance and Hunk here.”
There’s no visual on the comms; nothing but static. Hunk leans forward, tweaking a dial until the static diminishes. Lance grins. “What can we do you for?”
There’s such a long pause Lance wonders briefly if the system’s broken.
“Helllllo?” he drawls. “Anyone there?”
The voice on the other end sighs.
“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Keith groans.
It’s six hours before Lance and Hunk manage to pick up Keith and Shiro. Any thoughts Lance had of lording this over Keith dies as soon as the landing ramp hits the dirt.
“Quick,” Keith insists by way of greeting, “They’ll have seen you land, we have to get out of here. Hurry!”
Keith is a mess. He’s covered in scratches and bruises, his robe ripped and marred. He’s frantic, yelling up the ramp as Lance stares back at him, tongue-tied and paralyzed with shock.
Keith’s visibly supporting Shiro, who staggers with every step the two of them take up the ramp. Shiro’s bruised and bleeding too, from a scratch under his eye just to the left of his nose. For a second Lance is slammed with a double-vision of the Other Shiro, the one from his dream with a scar deep across his face -
No. That isn’t real. This is just a scratch; just a nick. What’s most frightening is the vacant look in Shiro’s eyes, the tiny tremors wracking his frame as Keith all but drags him onto the ship.
“Keith,” Shiro mutters, as their feet hit the metal grating of the interior. He’s swaying.
“We have to go,” Keith says, again. “Medbunk?”
“This way,” Hunk says, swooping in to sling Shiro’s other arm over his shoulder. “C’mon, big guy, we’re heading over here.”
Lance follows despite himself. “What the hell happened?”
“I don’t need it,” Shiro murmurs. The way he staggers into Hunk betrays him.
“You’re sitting down until I tell you otherwise,” Keith snaps. The medbunk’s not far; between the two of them he and Hunk get Shiro there with ease. “He threw you into a wall!”
“Who?” Lance gapes, hand gripping one of the overhead rails. Shiro lets himself be pushed down without complaint. The fingers of his hand are twisted tight in Keith’s tunic; he shows no sign of letting go and Keith doesn’t move to pull away. “What happened?”
“It was a trap,” Keith says tightly. “They sabotaged our ship and then ambushed us. Why aren’t we moving? Shiro, lay down.”
“I’m fine,” Shiro protests.
“You are so not, man,” Hunk says, placing his broad hand on Shiro’s chest when the other man tries to get up.
Shiro’s terribly pale and shaking. The stark red of blood stands out against his cheek. His pupils are blown wide. “We have to - the Council has to know - ”
“It can wait, Takashi,” Keith snaps, “Lay down.”
“I can comm them,” Lance offers. He’s halfway between the medbay and the cockpit, but despite Keith’s urgency the Force isn’t screaming at Lance to get them in the air. The mystery in front of him is too unnerving. “What do they need to know? What happened?”
“Medkit?” Keith grunts.
“Right here.” Hunk also reaches up to snap on the brighter lights of the medbunk. Shiro flinches. Keith turns Shiro’s cheek towards him to carefully apply a plasti; as he does Hunk gasps, shocked. “How did - Keith, your arm!”
“What?!” Lance abandons any pretext of giving them space, crowding in over Hunk’s shoulder.
“I’m fine,” Keith says. “I got out of the way.”
The sleeve of his robe is completely and utterly singed, marred in a distinctive pattern that Lance - Lance knows. How many times has he received a similar burn on his sleeve, on hems, even on flesh when the training blades are set low enough? Next to him Hunk gapes, speechless with horror. A chill runs down Lance’s spine. The Force goes very, very still.
There’s only one type of weapon in the entire galaxy that could cause that kind of a burn.
“Who did you run into?” Lance asks. It’s as if the words come from somewhere outside of him, someplace different. Distant. Cold with fear.
Keith stiffens. Shiro blinks, sucking in a ragged breath.
“Guys?” Hunk asks, worry and concern warring in the single word.
“A Sith,” Shiro says at last, into the horrified silence. He swallows, thick and choked. “He called himself Darth Sendak.”
09. The Force works in mysterious ways.
Shiro’s sitting on a bench in the hall, slumped, hunched over. He cradles his right wrist in his other hand. The lights overhead glint off the metal of his wrist and palm.
“I don’t know,” he says.
“I won’t let them,” Keith says, fierce, stern. “Shiro’s my friend. I’m not letting the Dark Side take him.”
“They’ll expel you from the Jedi Order.”
“Lance,” Keith says. Lance whirls; Keith’s standing there between Lance and an open ship, holding out a lightsaber. Their hands meet, over and under.
“Lance,” Keith says, again. His eyes burn. “Don’t do this.”
Lance jerks awake.
It’s late. The lights of the ship are dimmed, the comms silent. His heart’s pounding. Hunk snores next to him in the co-pilot’s seat, completely out. Lance leans over him, checking the hyperspace clock. Plenty of time.
Lance pulls Hunk’s robe off the back of the seat where his friend had tossed it, draping it over Hunk’s shoulders and tucking him in instead. Hunk snuffles a bit in his sleep, but doesn’t wake. Lance shakes his head fondly and stands up.
He needs some air, or something.
He’s heading for the little galley on board when he hears the voices. They’re quiet, pitched low and murmuring in the artificial night. The ship’s not exactly small, but Lance can’t help himself. He presses against the wall and settles his breathing.
“You need to tell someone,” Keith murmurs.
“It’s really nothing,” Shiro insists. He sounds exhausted. Lance can’t exactly blame him.
A tiny huff of air. “Don’t give me that. I’ve never seen you so off your game. Sendak rattled you.”
“He’s strong,” Shiro mutters, and if he’s trying for thoughtful, the tone isn’t quite there. “Keith. Nothing’s bleeding. I’m alright.”
“Your definition of ‘alright’ has always needed help,” Keith shoots back, so fast it’s clearly an old topic between them. “You don’t have to be bleeding to be hurt. What do you want, Lance?”
Lance jumps, startled. Caught, he swings sheepishly out from around the corner.
Keith’s sitting on the metal grating by the medbunk, glaring up at him. Shiro’s still lying down, though his eyes are focused now and there’s a little more color to his cheeks.
“Just passing through to the kitchen,” Lance offers. Keith exhales another tiny huff of air. Lance refuses to back down. “You guys want anything?”
Keith’s reply is immediate and harsh. “No thank you.”
Lance’s eyes narrow. Where does Keith get the right to be like that to him? What has Lance ever done? “I’m not going to poison you or anything. I know how to make caf just fine.”
“That’d be great, actually,” Shiro says, before Keith can. Keith starts to say something; Shiro cuts him off with a pointed look. “That’d be nice, Lance. Thank you.”
Keith shuts his mouth. He doesn’t make eye contact with Lance.
There’s nothing else Lance can do, then. He nods and turns to head back down the corridor.
He’s barely made it three steps before Shiro’s voice floats quietly to him once again.
“Why are you so rude to him?”
Lance’s feet stop.
He shouldn’t. He shouldn’t -
But something in him is upset, is coiled and tight and hurt. Keith rattles him too, even if he doesn’t mean to, even if Lance can’t explain why. Guiltily, quietly, Lance pulls the Force around his presence to mask it ever-so-slightly, making himself seem out of earshot and farther away than four feet down the hall.
“He started it,” Keith mutters. He sounds angry - no. Not angry. Sullen? Lance frowns.
Shiro sighs.
“I don’t want to talk about this,” Keith says.
A pause. The slight shifting of cloth, brief. “All I’m saying, Keith. Give him a chance.”
“Oh, so I’m supposed to be polite to someone who’s been nothing but rude to me?”
There’s a pointed silence. Lance frowns. I’m not always rude.
Right?
Keith sighs, that tiny little huff of air again. “He doesn’t - I don’t get him, Shiro. He’s always glaring at me, and he’s so - so loud. I don’t know how you do it.”
“I do it because it’s not hard,” Shiro says. “In addition to being talented, a good partner, and strong in the Force, Lance is also a Jedi Knight, just like you. He didn’t earn that title lightly. Ask him to spar with you, when we get back. He might surprise you.”
Keith doesn’t reply. Lance tucks the Force in closer to himself, hiding both his presence and the confusing mix of emotions the Force surges with. Pride swells in him again, but this time it’s also mingled with the hot burn of shame, pressing and tight.
Has he been mistreating Keith, too?
“I don’t understand him,” Keith says, at last.
“That might be because you haven’t tried,” Shiro suggests, slow and calm. “Lance is a good person, Keith. It doesn’t matter who ‘started’ it. One of you has to end it.”
Lance’s face heats, flushing embarrassed red in the darkness of the hall.
Jedi protect.
Jedi look out for others.
Jedi look out for their own.
How could he have forgotten so thoroughly?
Keith doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t need to. The awkward silence is enough.
Shiro chuckles, the sound tiny but true. “Besides.” Cloth rustles again, shifting for longer. “You might need him someday.”
“That the Force talking, or my laserbrained friend who shouldn’t be sitting up?”
“Can’t drink caf lying down.”
“You’re hopeless,” Keith mumbles, but it’s fond. Lance pushes himself away and heads for the kitchen.
The caf takes a bit of time to brew. Lance busies himself by grabbing the mugs (finding them, really; Hunk stores things in weird places sometimes) and giving them a good cleaning, just in case.
One for Shiro. One for him. One for Hunk, who’ll probably snore himself awake any second if he hasn’t already. Lance hums a little as he prepares the hot drink. He’s no Hunk, sure, but the motions are familiar and soothing.
Don’t do this, Keith’d said, in the dream. Lance’s hands still over the cups. Lance, don’t do this.
I don’t know, Shiro’d whispered, in the dream.
Shiro’d also said: One of you has to start.
Lance reaches and grabs a fourth mug.
By the time he returns to the medbunk, mugs balanced carefully in his hands, it’s been long enough he’s kind of surprised to still hear voices. The conversation’s turned again. Lance slows, not willing to risk the corner so fast with four mugs.
“So we get stronger,” Keith says. “We warn the Council; we insist. For next time.”
“You think so too, then.”
“The Sith didn’t just appear,” Keith says, low. Lance pauses, nearly spilling the caf. “You know it. I know it. If they’re out, they want something. This isn’t going to be the last time we see them. This is a beginning.”
There is a terrible, heart-wrenching pause.
“Shiro?”
Lance waits. Fabric shifts; someone sucks in a breath. Lance makes himself stay put.
“Shiro,” Keith whispers, barely loud enough to be heard. His voice cracks; Lance has never heard anyone sound so concerned as Keith does in this moment. “Shiro, what’s wrong?”
Lance cannot resist any longer. He peeks around the corner.
Keith’s kneeling now, looking up at his best friend. Shiro’s sitting up, folded in on himself. The lights of the bunk reflect off a face lined in weariness.
“I don’t know,” Shiro murmurs, and only Lance’s grip on the Force keeps the mugs from dropping. “But I…I have such a bad feeling about this.”
Shiro’s staring at his right hand.
10. When it happens, it’s devastating.
“I don’t know,” Shiro murmurs. He’s staring at his hands, the fingers of his right whirring as the machinery inside moves. It’s a quiet noise in the silence of the hall. “I couldn’t stop it.”
“Don’t do this,” Keith insists. He’s standing between Lance and a ship, lightsaber held out, eyes hard. “I trusted you.”
“Lance,” Hunk urges, frantic, “Lance, you need to come and come now, I can’t hold them off much longer!”
“No!” cries a new voice, one he’s never heard before, the syllables stark and short. “My father - my family!”
“The Council’s given up on him,” Keith concludes. The long windows of the temple let in the light of the setting sun. It’s warm and wrong across Keith’s skin, the hard purple of his eyes. His lightsaber hangs at his waist; not purple. Unignited. Dark. “They say Shiro’s gone.”
“The Council knows what’s best,” Lance tries. It’s like he’s speaking without being aware of it, like his tongue moves without his conscious consent. The words drift to his ears from afar. “I’m sure they - ”
“I don’t care what they say,” Keith snaps, and he’s looking over Lance’s shoulder - no. He’s making direct eye contact, cold hard steel burning into Lance’s gaze. Lance can’t look away. “They don’t know Shiro like I do. Shiro’s my friend. I’m not letting the Dark Side take him.”
Lance jolts awake with a cry, breathing hard and panicked. Cold sweat dries on his skin. The Force is screaming, crying with outrage all around him. With Keith’s words ringing in his ears Lance throws the bedcovers aside, clambering for his boots. He has to find Shiro. He has to ask. This time he has to ask, don’t be a coward, Lance, if Shiro’s really in danger from the Dark Side Lance owes it to him to ask.
The Force cries, swirling around him, upset upset upset. There’s no time. Lance doesn’t have time to sit and be sick about it. The Force barks a warning just as he palms open the door to his bedroom. Hunk stands on the other side, hand raised to knock.
“Lance!”
“Hunk,” Lance gasps. “Hunk, I need to talk to Shiro. He’s - ”
Hunk’s jaw drops. “How did you know? Did the Force tell you?”
“I - what?” Lance’s thoughts grind to a stop. The Force - told him something, if that’s what the vision was, but right now it’s just screaming, crying and loud. He can barely stand. “I - no? What? Hunk, how did I know what?”
Hunk’s eyes widen. “You don’t - you don’t know, then. Oh, Lance. I’m…I’m so sorry.”
For the first time Hunk’s alarm fully reaches him. The pallor of Hunk’s skin; the way he’s worrying at his lip; the way he’s wringing his hands. The wide fear in his eyes. “Sorry? Sorry for what? Hunk, what’s wrong?”
“The call just came in,” Hunk says. Lance’s breath catches in his throat. “I was coming to wake you. Shiro was escorting some scientists over to Kamino. They were - we think they were shot down.”
The Force slams to a shuddering, desperate full-pitch halt.
“No,” Lance breathes.
“Master Coran commed,” Hunk says. Worry mingles with great sorrow in his eyes. The Force coils around the both of them, upset and distraught. “If anyone would know, it’s him. Their ship was destroyed, Lance. Shiro’s gone.”
12. Lance catches Keith in the hangar, wide-eyed and frantic.
“Keith!”
“Don’t try to stop me.” Keith’s got a bag over his shoulder, bulky and crowded. Exhaustion lines the shadows under his eyes, sits rigid in the tension of his shoulders. “He’s not gone. Get out of my way.”
“No.” Lance stands his ground. “Keith, you’re too close to this. We’re all - ”
“He’s not dead,” Keith cries, a near shout in the emptiness of the hangar at this hour of the morning. “Someone sabotaged their ship, exploded it or something just so we’d think that. Shiro isn’t gone.”
“Keith,” Lance tries, again. The Force whispers around him, keening and lost. He takes a step closer. “Keith, you have every right to be upset - ”
Keith pulls away, out of range. “Don’t touch me.”
Lance pulls back too, fingers hanging in the air. How do you comfort someone who doesn’t want to be comforted?
“Okay, I’ll play,” he says. Something beeps from the ship behind him; Keith looks up, brow tight. “Say Shiro’s not dead. Where is he?”
“That’s what I want to know,” Keith snaps. “And that’s what I’m going to find out. If he’s stranded, or someone took him, I’ll - I’ll find him. I’m not letting this happen.”
I’m not letting the Dark Side take him.
Lance stills. Keith, sensing the change, pushes past Lance’s shoulder and towards his ship.
“Wait,” Lance says, spinning round. “Keith, wait. There’s no proof someone took him.”
Keith turns, too. His eyes meet Lance’s. Lance braces for Keith’s angry hot glare -
- and is instead surprised to see frustrated, bitter sorrow.
“Shiro’s not dead, Lance,” Keith says. He swallows. “He isn’t. I would’ve…”
He stops. The Force whispers. Lance notices it almost absently: a warm press, like heat from sitting too close to a fire. Keith takes a deep breath.
“I would’ve felt it,” he says, quietly.
It’s the first piece of honesty they’ve ever shared.
Lance’s heart catches in his throat.  “Are you two…?”
He doesn’t even know what question to ask.
Keith shrugs, hefting his bag higher on his shoulder. “I’ve known Shiro my whole life. I don’t care what the Council says about this; he’s still out there. I’m not wasting another second here while he’s alone and in danger.”
“He isn’t alone,” Lance says, still trying, still reeling. “What about the scientists he was with? Hutch? Holt?”
“Does it matter?” Keith asks tightly. “If I find them too, great. Shiro’s my first priority. I have his last known coordinates. Every minute I waste arguing with you about this is a minute longer he’s on his own. Now let me go.”
The Force whispers to Lance again, distraught, tired. It’s more of a whine -
No.
It’s a murmur.
It’s a murmur of a creek, small and new. It’s a murmur built into the swish of an open door; the shout of a pilot from the cockpit (everyone on?). It’s a murmur shaded in the blur of a lightsaber late at night (green, not purple). It’s a murmur founded in the answer of a frantic call (you’ve got to be kidding me). It’s a murmur crafted around the corner of a small ship, formed in the hold of a tiny kitchen, pulling down a fourth mug.
Let go.
“I’m not here to stop you,” Lance says. Keith’s head snaps up. “I’m here to help.”
Keith opens his mouth to reply; Lance holds up his hand. “I get it. I get that you don’t like me, but Shiro’s my friend, too. If I can help, I want to. I’m going to. And besides: you need a pilot.”
Keith blinks, stunned. “I need a what?”
“You need a pilot,” Lance repeats. “Or a co-pilot, whatever. That ship behind you’ll fly a lot better with two sets of hands. Or we can take Blue. She’s old but she’s fast. You and Shiro both already know her.”
“Blue?” Keith echoes, confused.
“My ship,” Lance clarifies. “I mean, not ‘mine’, of course, she belongs to the Temple just like the pod you’re borrowing there, but. She’s sturdy, and she can get us to Kamino faster than this old thing. What do you say?”
Something in Keith’s eyes shifts, a barrier not breaking, but…bending, perhaps. In the Force, a tiny ember sparks.
“I’m not asking you to come with me,” he says.
“Tough,” Lance says. “I’m offering. Yes or no?”
The silence in the hangar is thick. Any minute now the Temple’s going to wake thoroughly; any minute the hangar’s going to flood with droids, beginning their morning routine of maintenance. They’re out of time.
“What about Hunk?” Keith asks, finally.
“I left him a note,” Lance lies. Hunk will understand. “Are we doing this, or not?”
+1. Keith agrees.
(other AUs: daemons | fashion | pirates | fantasy: magic | fantasy: urban | sports | fantasy: obsidian | hogwarts )
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ciathyzareposts · 6 years ago
Text
Crusaders of the Dark Savant: Gorn and Scumbles
As I arrive in a new dungeon,the game again tells me my own thoughts.
             My trip to the Holy City of Munkharama didn’t last very long. I mapped the small temple area, but my progress was impeded by a series of doors that had cups attached to them–they clearly want me to drop something in. There was also a group of four urns in each corner of the temple that also clearly want something.
Progress to the east was impeded by an inability to swim multiple squares at a time. There was a wishing well that had this riddle:
           I know a thousand faces, and count the tallied heads, feasting bright upon the eyes, of the may who have died. Wielding well a mighty power, who hath but humble stature, masses fall upon their knees, to scarce behold my only side!
           The game asked what I wanted to shout into the well, but I didn’t know what it was looking for. If the text is supposed to be a riddle, I suppose the answer might be COINS, but somehow this didn’t occur to me when I was there. I left the temple exploring the forest to the south, but overly-difficult combats turned me back.               
Nothing in particular. Is shouting in a well something you typically do?
             A few of my characters got extra levels during this process, and my alchemist finally got something I’d been waiting for: a mass-damage spell. In this case, it was “Acid Bomb,” which does damage to every enemy in a group for several rounds in a row. I decided to head back to New City and try storming the jail one more time. This time, it worked. I defeated the Dark Savant’s groups of guardians and troopers and got the jail key. There was a colored keypad blocking access to the jail, but I figured out the code from a “black wafer” I had previously found in the city.                 
Rescuing this prisoner set off the entire “Gorn” episode.
          The prisoner turned out to be a Gorn captain named Boerigard, who said he had been betrayed while trying to find a secret fortress called Orkogre Castle. (The game is inconsistent and sometimes spells it “Orkorge.”) Upon further questioning, he begged me to travel to the castle and warn the Gorn king that “the Dartaen Alliance is broken.” He gave me a letter to show Lord Galiere–the Gorn we all have the hots for–and thus get safe passage through the forest.
I returned to where I had met Galiere and showed him the letter. He let me pass but warned me that the Gorn Empire was embroiled in a civil war and that I’d find plenty of hostile Gorn. He also mentioned that the Gorn wizard Murkatos had recently been assassinated.            
My map of the land I’ve explored so far.
           The land beyond Galiere opened up into several large branches. Orkogre Castle ended up being just a short way to the northwest, but owing to my exploration pattern, I got pretty far afield before I found it. The road split into major northeast and northwest sections, and only an increasing combat difficulty kept me from exploring in those directions indefinitely. Ultimately, the combats had the effect of funneling me to Orkogre, but it took several hours.                
These guys were way too hard for me.
               Orkogre Castle took up several small underground levels. I had to find a series of keys and levers to open the necessary grates to move forward. One puzzle involved a caged ape, to whom I had to give him a bunch of bananas (found elsewhere in the dungeon) to get him to open the lever to his cell. There were numerous combats with hostile parties of Gorn.              
Using keys to open a door.
           The level culminated in an encounter with the old Gorn king, who sat feebly on his throne. I transcribed his speech to give you a sense of the game’s long-winded approach to text:
          So the gods have decided to put the old king out of his misery at last, eh? Look you now upon this soulful guise, but once it were not so. How the orchard blossoms have faded in the fields. Though my army still stands strong, their strength is but a shallow weakness, for their spirit is broken. And now they wage war upon themselves, having lost that fleeting essence which fuels the heart and makes possible all loves and desires. The vision of their destiny has been broken. Shattered by the crushing presence of you who come from the stars. What grim irony that your visage now stands so mockingly before me. Shall you be the ghosts of my tormentors to haunt my dreams in the hereafter? Or merely be you that come to put the sword in my heart and end this mortal suffering. I see it all now, so clear. Worlds within worlds continually unfolding. The boundaries of time crossed and overlapping as easily as one might step from the garden into the forests. Like simple fish in the oceans, flipping and darting, living out their days unaware of the unseen universes which lie in the sky above their heads, so near and yet so far. How likened unto every man, that all these galaxies swing and orbit around him, continually in his sight and yet never seen nor glimpsed. Save that small portion which leaks into his momentary vision and births a thousand tales of miracles and divine conception. I pray you, grant this King these ramblings. Would that I could take my mind and thrust it upon you! But instead am forced to fling only the feeble stones of words. But tell me strangers, what cause brings you this day? 
         Finally, I had my chance to tell him that THE DARTAEN ALLIANCE IS BROKEN, only to get hit with another monologue:
         What’s this?! The Dartaen Alliance at end?! Then the prophesy is indeed come. So be it. We shall all play our part as was foretold. And meet in the infernos of the hereafter. But perhaps there be slack enough for dangerous sport with the oracles in this. For who is tosay that an end is naught but a gateway to some new beginning. And the pages yet unread be but deliberately concealed! !think I see much mischief in the fates. And perhaps it not be too late to learn their game. But what say you, be you willing to take a part?
              YES, I offered, and got a key to his treasure chamber, where I might find a “sacred piece of parchment.” The king decided to rouse himself and “find sport amongst [his] troops.” I later encountered him a few times in the hallways, where I amused myself by selling him the various bits of weapons and armor I’d looted from his own castle.            
Selling the king a cuirass from his own armory.
            It isn’t just the volume of text, nor David Bradley’s bardic aspirations, that make the readings a little tiresome. It’s more the way the text is presented, about 10 words at a time in a huge font, every sentence ending in an ellipse. It frequently looks like you’re done, because a sentence will end three words into the screen, but then it just picks up again on the next screen, as if the developers wanted to make sure every sentence started on a fresh screen. When you see it all written out above, it perhaps doesn’t look so bad, but when it’s being fed to you one line at a time and you don’t know when it will ever–for gods’ sake–just end, it’s like Chinese water torture.
When you meet an NPC, you sometimes just get dialogue options. Other times, you get options to do things like steal, trade, and share lore. I haven’t done much with the latter, but when I tried it with the Gorn king, he gave me several pieces of information, some of which seem like they conflict with each other:
              Mick the Pick has formed an alliance with King Ulgar. (Ulgar is the king giving this information to me.)
Our party has been fighting Mick the Pick at Orkogre Castle. (Mick the Pick is a ratkin NPC who I encountered but couldn’t get anything useful out of.)
The “Legend” Map is rumored to be hidden near Old City.
Captain Boerigard has been sighted at Lost Temple.
Captain Boerigard has been sighted at Ukpyr.
             The king’s chest was a bust. I opened it to find it empty.”Someone else has been here recently,” the game noted. Some commenters warned me that this could happen. I only hope it’s both possible to get the item later and obvious when the opportunity appears.
Continuing to explore the castle, I was attacked by the spirit of the wizard Murkatos. He had some powerful draining attacks and it took me a few attempts to defeat him. As he faded away, he told me (as part of a long speech) to seek the Tomb of Vilet Kanebe in the church of Nyctalinth. “There you will find a hidden part of what you seek.” His rooms had a lot of magic treasure and a Bonsai tree.              
“Borne of Gorn” would be a good name for a rock band.
             During this process, I lost about one-quarter of the combats that I fought (meaning at least one character died, a condition I couldn’t cure until the end of this session, when I found some resurrection scrolls). I’m finding the combat system a lot more frustrating than previous titles in the series. First, there’s a lot of variability to the difficulty. I remember this was true of Wizardry VI as well.You wander into a square and face 4 Gorn leaders, 4 Gorn shamans, 6 Gorn rangers, and 6 Gorn lancers. Thoroughly trounced, you reload, re-enter the same square, and get 3 Gorn rangers.              
This was one of the unlucky times.
           But even the easy battles are never throwaway battles. The game is genre savvy. It knows you can rest after every combat if necessary, so it’s not content to try to whittle down your hit points with endless parties of easy foes. And thus you can’t just blow through the combat with a series of physical attacks. With every other enemy capable of poison, paralysis, blinding, itching, stamina drains, or something worse, you have to strategize almost every battle. This almost always means casting at least one spell.
There are a lot of useful spells–so many that I’m only beginning to explore them. I’ll leave a longer posting about magic for later. For now, suffice to say that the mana bar is a bit misleading,because you really have separate pool of points for each spell “realm” (fire, water, air, earth, mental, and divine). Within each realm, you can only cast one or two spells (at least, at a decent power level) before needing to rest again.
In the rare case that you do just want to use physical attacks, the animations and sounds slow things down enough that you can’t simply hold down the ENTER key and blow through it.              
Three of these hateful bastards destroyed me.
             I don’t want to complain too much because so few games offer truly tactical combat. Crusaders is a bit exhausting in the number, lengths, and intensity of the combats, but I suppose that’s preferable to games that offer no tactics at all. 
The final issue is that character development doesn’t seem to make as much difference as I feel it should. A couple of my characters are maxed in their primary weapon skills, but it doesn’t feel like they hit more often or do more damage than when they only had 25 points. Of course, it doesn’t help that leveling slowed to a standstill after everyone passed Level 9.
At some point, I noticed that Gideon had enough points to change from a fighter to a lord, so I made the switch. Now I’m toying with moving my bard to a proper mage; I feel like my major weakness in combat is a lack of traditional mage power. The problem is that I’m still getting plenty of use out of his lute, but then again my alchemist has a “Sleep” spell now and plenty of points in that area. I’m also running out of reasons not to switch my thief to a ninja. I was thinking about doing both when they cross Level 10. As for the rest, I sort of like their existing classes, frankly.           
Bix puts a bunch of T’Rang to sleep.
            I’m not sure I put enough time into thinking about how to handle class changes strategically. When you switch, you lose a lot of attributes (to the minimums of the class you’re switching to) but not your health, stamina, mana, spell points, spells,or skills. Part of me feels that the best way to “game the system” would be to keep switching at Level 2, thus keeping the number of experience points needed for the next level low and maximizing the frequency with which you earn points to put into skills as well as new spells. Then, after switching a lot at low levels early in the game, finally settle on one class for the bulk of the game and try to get a high a level as possible. Unfortunately, I didn’t approach it that way and will probably have most characters switch only once and some not at all.             
My lord has managed to gain some high attributes since switching to this class.
          Miscellaneous notes:
           My characters haven’t really aged much since starting the game, but I have no idea how far I am, and all the resting is giving me the heebie-jeebies. I wonder if there’s any real chance of dying of old age.
I got so sick of not being able to swim more than one square at a time that I spent a lot of time swimming and resting (since the skill goes up with use). Almost everyone is over 50 in the skill now, but I still can’t swim more than a few squares without stamina running out. I’m guessing you can never build the skill to such a level that you can swim long distances with n trouble.
The game re-uses a lot of art. At least 6 creatures use the “giant bug” animation and at least that many use the “giant black bird” animation. This makes it hard to keep track of the enemies. I always forget whether a “Dragon Rook” is worse than a “Vampire Rook” or vice versa.
It’s frustrating that you can’t target specific enemies. If a group has 4 enemies asleep and 1 awake, I want to target the awake one, not spread my attacks out so that everyone wakes up.
I’ve learned to hit the “search” key at just about every environmental message. If there isn’t something to find, there’s often a supplemental message. 
                           This is exactly the sort of place you want to hit the “S” key.
            For my next move, I can go back to Munkharama and try the potential answer to the riddle. I still have several squares in New City for which I need keys and clues. When I was there, I wasted some more time with Professor Wunderland but still couldn’t figure out how to get the key to the Old City. If this is something I should know by now, I wouldn’t mind an explicit spoiler. Finally, I have at least three forest directions (two north of Munkharama and one south) left to try, in addition to the poppy fields near New City that I still have no way to navigate.
I really don’t know how any of this stuff ties in with the backstory yet. My party seems to have gotten embroiled in local matters and lost sight of the whole Astral Dominae business.
Time so far: 23 hours
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