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gch1995 · 1 year ago

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The Luke training Grogu sequence started off so well. For a second, I thought the writers were actually going to do his character justice by staying true to the roots of OT and Legends Luke Skywalker, he’d let Mando pick up his baby after school every day, and then bring him back every morning. At the very least, I hoped he’d give Grogu the opportunity to join the new Jedi Order as a normal boarding school student. Yeah, he wouldn’t get to see Mando every day anymore in that scenario, but they could still keep in touch with each other, see each other on weekends and holidays, and send and receive gifts from each other.

Instead, they decided to make him Obi-Wan/Yoda 2.0 because they needed to still justify the fact that they lazily copied and pasted Anakin’s and Luke’s arcs, character development, and stories in the OT and PT sagas onto MaRey Sue and Crylo Ren in the ST films by bringing back Palpatine and having the Skywalker and Jedi Order fail again.

The Din Djarin and Grogu scenes are all really adorable. What they’ve done to the Jedi and Skywalker legacy in the current canon really disappoints me, though. It’s not staying true to their previously established storyline of the Skywalkers bringing balance to the force at all.

If nothing else, at the very least Luke is much more honest, fair, and kind than his predecessors as a teacher. He offers a much more honest choice to Grogu between being a Jedi or going back to Mando. He gives him the resources to safely travel back home with food, that space ship filled with R4, communication devices, and other technology when he choose Mando instead.

He’s far less cold, critical, deceitful, dismissive, and manipulative of a teacher to Grogu than Obi-Wan was to either him or his father. Anakin was a slave child who Qui Gonn freed without his or his mother’s consent, he read his Midichlorian level without Anakin’s knowledge, and he deliberately neglected to tell Anakin the fact that he could very likely never have any close relationships again by becoming a Jedi. Obi-Wan and Yoda disowned Luke as a student, told him he was doomed to fail for not listening to them about “letting go of attachments” to focus on training when he had a force vision of his friends potentially being in life-threatening danger, and refused to offer him any sort of resources that would have allowed this to this innocent and inexperienced young Luke to feel safe going off on his own without their guidance or support. Not to mention the fact that Obi-Wan and Yoda deceived and manipulated him in their recruitment of him to destroy Vader for their own ends until Luke found out the truth from Vaderkin himself, and they didn’t even seem to feel that bad about it when he called them out on their shit.

I still expected a Luke who realized that “no attachments” creed was dysfunctionally obsessive bullshit that led to his predecessors downfall, so he wasn’t going to be like them with it in his new Order. That was the Luke we got in the OT films and Legends. This Luke is still better than Obi-Wan and Yoda, but he’s still missing what was supposed to make him such a game changer for the Jedi Order in the OT films by instead obsessing over that “no attachments” garbage.

Grogu with Din Djarin & Luke Skywalker

#anti st Star Wars #din djarin #jedi critical #they completely destroyed Luke’s character arc #and made a mockery of Anakin’s #as well as all the suffering of the previous Jedi order because of that no attachment obsession #anakin skywalker #luke skywalker #anti kylo ren #anti rey #grogu djarin #din grogu

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thewayofthetrashcompactor · 6 years ago

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For Day 6 of @reylo-au week! I went with Harry Potter.

Prompt for this was: "Ben and Rey sharing their taste in music, and like idk that could be a date or the first time they meet."

It expanded a bit from the original prompt, but today Ben gets to hear Rey's taste in music, and tomorrow she hears his! First comes the angst, then tomorrow comes the fluff on Day 7 for free day.

also on ao3

Words: 2718 Rating: T

(A/N: Yes, jizz is a real type of music in the Star Wars universe. (Poor Rey))

Rey taps her foot as she waits, bobbing her head to the music. The DJ in the club keeps a good energy going, and she feels the beat of the latest song in her veins, keeping pace with the pounding of her heart. She doesn’t know much about music, but the song is loud with an edge of anger, in a way she could let herself get lost in if she wasn’t already busy. She has to keep herself from checking the wand tucked into the waistband of her low-riding jeans. She’s supposed to be undercover, in a place where no blood-conscious wizard would be caught dead.

She glances around the dark room where multicolored lights flash over the crowds of bodies, hordes of young people out to take what they can from the night. It isn’t a place where the remnants of the Death Eaters would be hanging out. The smells of alcohol and sweat have seeped into walls and sticky floors and the air of the room clings to her, humid and warm. Rey idly stirs the fruity drink dripping in her hand. She’d gotten one for appearances, wincing at the price, but doesn’t intend on drinking any of it. She leans against the small table shoved against the wall that she’d claimed for her own and scans the room again for her informant.

A man she’d noticed hunched over another table nearby keeps watching her, likely considering his chances if he approached her. He’s not bad looking, a little odd but tall and broad, with soft dark hair that falls over his face. She has a mission though, and it’s not to get laid. He wears a black leather jacket over his black shirt, conveniently matching his black pants, and she wonders how he's not dying of heat in the crowded space. She's grateful for the lightness of her low-cut top, even though it has to be long enough to cover the suspicious bulges of the gear she's packed away.

(continued under cut)

She tries to mentally convince the man to stay away. Unfortunately, her legilimency skills are still lacking. He drags himself up from his table, revealing he’s even taller than she’d thought, and strides lazily over to hers.

“You actually enjoy this garbage?” he says, gesturing vaguely at the DJ as he leans next to her, interrupting the way she’d been swaying to the beat.

Rey’s mouth falls open, the polite but firm insistence that she’s waiting for someone she’d prepared for him falling from her mind. “So what if I do?” she finally demands.

He looks at her from the corner of his eye, facing the writhing crowd filling the rest of the club with an expression of distaste. “Seriously?”

She crosses her arms. “Yes.” She’d just enjoyed it before, but now she’s ready to defend it to this asshole like it’s the best thing she’s ever heard.

He snorts. “So much for taste.”

“I’m sorry the club isn’t playing fucking Mozart for you,” she snaps.

He rolls his eyes. “I’m not asking for an orchestra. I just don’t think it’s unreasonable to want to listen to something that doesn’t consist entirely of bass and autotune.”

“Let me guess. You don’t listen to anything that wasn’t hand carved onto a rock by true artists who’ve never willingly touched anything electronic in their lives.” She wonders if kneeing him and walking away would call too much attention to her.

“Actually, I enjoy some good jizz,” he says, completely straight-faced.

Rey chokes. She can’t tell if that was the worst pick up line ever said or if he actually means it.

“The new stuff too, not just the classics,” he continues, apparently taking her reaction as disbelief.

“What --” she starts to ask, and then realizes she really doesn’t want to play into whatever punchline he’s set up. “That’s...nice,” she says instead.

He frowns at her. “I know most people think it’s old fashioned, but if you really experience jizz in person…”

“Look,” she interrupts, not wanting to hear where this is going. “I’m waiting for someone. So if you --”

His frown deepens. “I know, Rey.”

She goes completely rigid, hand planting itself over where her wand is hidden before she can stop herself. “How the fuck --?”

He digs into his dark jacket and pulls a silver coin out from a hidden pocket. Her eyes widen. “I’m waiting for someone too,” he says dryly.

She reaches into her pocket and takes out a matching coin. When they move the two together, the coins glow gently, confirming their authenticity. They both shove them away and regard each other.

“Kylo,” he says, introducing himself.

She knows. “How did you know it was me?” she asks.

His lips quirk. “It wasn’t hard to pick out a wizard in this crowd.”

She bristles at that. “Between the two of us, I don’t think I was the one who had trouble blending in.”

“Between the two of us, I’m the one who recognized you,” he says, shrugging.

She glares. “You still haven’t said how you figured that out.”

“It wasn’t so much that you’re a witch,” he says, straightening. “Just that you clearly aren’t here for the same reasons as everyone else. You’re too on edge, like you’re about to pounce. Even if you did make a good show of actually enjoying the headache they call music here.”

“I do enjoy it,” she says, scowling.

His eyes widen. “Really? This?”

“Yes!”

He shakes his head. “Next time we’re meeting in a jizz bar so you can see something real.”

“We’re not doing that,” she says decisively. “And you’re getting ahead of yourself. You haven’t given me anything to make this meeting worthwhile yet, let alone another one.”

“Right.” His face turns drawn and shadowed and he takes a step into her, closing most of the space between them. She nearly protests, but then he speaks in a low tone, just loud enough for her to hear over the music in their close quarters. “Snoke is building up to something big. He sees the defeat in Europe as an opportunity to expand, not a loss. He’s brought in two Death Eaters from the fight over there, and they’re angry and ready for revenge. He’s not going to stop.”

She leans back enough to be able to look up at him, something she’s not used to having to do. “How do we know that any of that is true, and it’s not just a scare tactic to put us on edge?” she hisses. “You’re one of them. How can we possibly trust you?”

His warm brown eyes meet hers intently, and something nudges at her, telling her she’s seen that look before. “What other choice do you have?” he asks, and Rey gasps as the familiarity clicks.

Leia had said those same words to her, when Rey had demanded to know why they were even considering trusting one of the enemy. That same tone, the intense eyes with their cast of sadness, the curves of his face -- there’s no denying it.

“It’s you,” she breathes.

He frowns. “I thought we established that.”

She shakes her head. “No, it’s you. You’re Leia’s son.” His face closes off completely at that, body angling ever so slightly away from her, and she knows she’s right.

Rumors of Leia’s son that she’d lost years before were whispered through the Resistance out of their leader’s hearing, though Rey wasn’t stupid enough to think that Leia didn’t know. Poe had shown her a photo once, when she’d gotten curious enough to ask, of him, his parents, and the general with her husband and son. Rey had found it unbearably sad at the time: Poe’s mother, Leia’s family, all lost to the First Order. But the resemblance between the happy couple she’d seen in the photo and their dark haired child to the brooding man in front of her is undeniable.

“Of course, she didn’t mention that little detail,” he says bitterly. His hand wraps around the edge of the table, gripping hard enough that the cheap plastic creaks.

Rey’s mind races. “How can you work for the Order? After everything they’ve done?”

“It wasn’t like that,” he says defensively, but it’s obvious the words aren’t convincing even to him.

“Wasn’t it?” she asks, crossing her arms again, ignoring how they brush against his chest with how close they still are.

“I don't need to justify myself to you,” he snarls, lashing out like a wounded animal.

“Fine.” She shoves away from the table, fully prepared to leave. She'd known the idea that one of Snoke's own trusted leaders would turn on him was too good to be true.

“Wait.” His hand clutches desperately at hers, hot and sweaty. One sharp look from her and he drops it, though he doesn't relent.

She stops, but doesn't relax. “I'm waiting.”

“It… made sense, at first,” he says, haltingly. She pauses, still ready to turn on her heel and leave, though something in the raw vulnerability of his expression convinces her to stay, at least to hear this.

“I believed in my grandfather's work, that we shouldn't have to hide, that all this secrecy only leads to destruction.” The words tumble out faster as he continues, and she wonders if he's ever said this to anyone before. “Magical and non magical share this planet, and we need to accept that, not bury it until it comes back to bite us all, again. Snoke made it sound like that's what he wanted too, made me feel valued, like I belonged.” He takes a deep breath, shuddering on the exhale. She shifts on her feet. It makes sense, she knows too well the kind of conflicts that have come from the Statute of Secrecy, and the kind of loneliness that makes a person ready to accept the first welcoming hand to come along.

“It was… easy. Too easy. Snoke leads the Order because he knows exactly what to say, exactly how to use the people around him. Everything we did, he explained how it was necessary, that it was for the good of everyone. It felt right.” He ends in a snarl, all anger turned inwards. The words come out like he's dragging them out of a morass deep inside of him, wiping them off and presenting them, still dripping, to her, in a desperate hope for her trust. His tone speaks to the bitter taste of them on his tongue. She swallows, acid burning the back of her throat.

“They killed your father,” she says. Anger and betrayal towards the only family she's known war with her sympathy.

His broad shoulders hunch inwards, like he can collapse into himself. His voice comes out in a whisper. “I know.”

Her chest rises and falls in quick, shallow pants as the tangle of emotion rises to choke her. “They killed your family and you let them brand you!”

His hand grasps his arm where she knows Snoke's mark is burned into his skin. His nails dig into his jacket. “I know,” he says again, louder, angrier. “I'm reminded every single day that this is a part of me.”

“You're not the only one,” she says viciously. “Can you even imagine what you've done to your mother?”

For the first time since they've met, she has the fleeting fear that he might hurt her. It passes in an instant, the rage twisting his features pressing in and collapsing into misery. “I'll answer for that to her,” he says quietly. “Not to you.” He draws himself together, though the cracks where she can push and break him apart again remain obvious. “I can't change what I've done or what the Order has done. I want no part of what they have planned, but I know it's too late for me. I'm only here to tell you what Snoke intends. If you don't believe me, he will succeed.”

She can feel the tension surrounding them as she balances on the paper-thin edge of the choice he's given her. She wishes she knew what waited on either side.

“Do you… regret it?” It's the one thing she needs to know.

He looks down at the table, as if the answer will rise up out of the mess of stains and spills. “So much,” he says finally, barely audible.

She nods. “Okay.” A deep breath, centering herself. “Tell me what you know.”

His head jerks up and he meets her eyes with the kind of shock that comes from a foregone assumption that he won't be believed. She steps closer to him so their voices won't carry and then reaches out to rest a hand on his hip in an awkward attempt to blend in with the couples around them. He jumps at the contact, eyes going wide. She meets his gaze steadily, even as her heart pounds so hard she can barely breathe.

“What's Snoke planning?” she asks quietly, head tilted up to his.

The words jolt him out of the bewildered trance he'd slipped into at her touch. He clears his throat and angles himself in towards the table, distancing his front from hers. “He’s building his forces,” he says, matching her tone. “I told you about the fugitives he brought in from the remains of the order over there. I think he wants to use them to start expanding, create a base he can call on when the time comes.”

Rey nods. This is about what they’ve expected from Snoke, though the addition of new blood could be a problem. He continues. “That’s not all he’s bringing over either. There are creatures, dangerous ones, that he’s had people fetch for him, some from overseas, big shipments coming into the port. The kind of things he doesn’t have to worry about giving directions to, he’ll just let them loose and take advantage of the fallout.”

Shipments coming in. A sense of foreboding pushes against Rey, and her instincts rarely fail her. “Is that what happened to Han at the docks? He got in the way of one of those?”

He closes his eyes briefly. “Yes,” he says, choked.

She lets out a slow breath. “What kind of creatures?”

He collects himself, chest rising and falling in measure breaths. “I’m not sure. Yet. I haven’t gotten a clear look. After...that, I got in a disagreement with the new general and Snoke’s been keeping me on the edges as punishment. But I’ll find out.”

“Okay,” she says, tapping her fingers on the table as she thinks. “We need to know what to prepare for.”

“I know.” He glances back at her, letting her see the determination in his features. “As soon as I can.”

Some instinct guides her to squeeze her hand over his hip before she lets go. “Thank you.” She wipes her sweaty palm on her jeans. “Anything else you can tell us?”

He shakes his head. “Not right now. Just that you need to be ready. Things are moving quickly.”

“We will,” she assures him.

He watches her carefully. “Will you meet me again?”

She can’t help but feel that he’s asking for more than a chance to pass on whatever intel he can gather. “Yes,” she agrees quickly. “Same place?”

“No.” He frowns. “Even if we think they won’t come here, we shouldn’t count on it. We need to keep moving. There’s another club two blocks over on 23rd, do you know it?”

She thinks. “Maybe. I’ll find it. How long do you need?”

“Not more than a week,” he says decisively.

“Next Friday?” she suggests.

He nods. “I’ll see you then.” He pauses, like he wants to say something else, but then nods again and turns away.

Rey watches as he disappears into the crowd, tracking his dark hair over the dancers until she can’t see it anymore. Impulsively, she grabs her now watery drink from the table and takes a gulp. She doesn’t know what it is about Kylo, but she’s left feeling like she’d missed something. She takes another sip, not even noticing the taste as her mind plays over every detail of their interaction. He’s left her with plenty to think about. And she’ll be seeing him again. Next week.

She finishes off her drink and heads to the bar for another.

(hope to have part two posted tomorrow!)

#reylo #benrey #rffa writers #reylo au week #reylo writing den #crylo weekend #my fic #harry potter au

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monsterleadmehome · 6 years ago

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let’s be human (while we still remember how)

for @dalzonii, part of Crylo Boot Camp weekend at @thereylowritingden

Day 1: Angst | Day 2: Fluff

We are breezes chasing after wind Two unjoined pieces searching for a way to fit Sleepers waking in the half light up till now Let's be human while we still remember how

Kylo Ren has defected to the Resistance and will only speak to Rey of Jakku, much to General Poe Dameron's chagrin. Can Rey get the information from him that she needs for to turn the tide of the war? And what is she supposed to do with all these feelings that Ben Solo has stirred in her soul?

two unjoined pieces | searching for a way to fit

#reylo #reylo fic #crylo update #the reylo writing den

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ao3feed--reylo · 6 years ago

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let's be human (while we still remember how)

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2MLRm8T

by monsterleadmehome

We are breezes chasing after wind Two unjoined pieces searching for a way to fit Sleepers waking in the half light up till now Let's be human while we still remember how

My submission for The Writing Den's Crylo Boot Camp weekend.

Words: 3772, Chapters: 1/2, Language: English

Fandoms: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi (2017)

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: F/M

Characters: Rey (Star Wars), Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Kylo Ren, Poe Dameron, Finn (Star Wars), Rose Tico

Relationships: Kylo Ren/Rey, Rey/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren, Rey & Ben Solo | Kylo Ren

Additional Tags: Angst, Angst and Humor, Canon Compliant, Post-TLJ, Fluff and Smut, but not till chapter 2

read it on the AO3 at https://ift.tt/2MLRm8T

#IFTTT #ao3feed #fanfic #Star Wars #Reylo #Kylo Ren #Rey

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lightandwinged · 7 years ago

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HOO BOY.

(non-spoiler: my Carrie spent the entire film kicking me like mad; I think she knew. Isaac, on the other hand, seemed to sleep through it all)

(there be spoilers within)

I am trying to decide how much of my feeling right now is “I really liked that” and how much of my feeling right now is “AHAUHSUHASUHFHGUHH CARRRRIIIIEEEEEEE” because I do not know. Because it was, objectively, a good film. Really well shot, really well acted, no more plot holes than the OT and pretty good writing overall (I heard somewhere that Carrie script doctored it, so of course the writing was good). I just don’t know if I liked it.

So let’s go through it, shall we?

First of all, if you’ve been venturing into spoiler tags like I have (I can’t not be spoiled, I’m sorry, I did my time with Lost and Harry Potter and feel I’m worse for the wear), everything is true. Luke milks some sort of naked space sloth slug thing and it’s the worst thing I’ve ever seen. Luke also dies, but I don’t know how you’d recover from that milking scene, tbh. Like he just milks the sloth and then he drinks the blue milk and looks at Rey like “wut” and LITERALLY THAT SCENE IS AWKWARD AND TERRIBLE WHY WAS IT IN THE MOVIE.

Sorry.

The other rumors are true, too. And I’m going through the smaller ones first because I’m still processing the big ones.

Leia flies through space like Superman, and honestly, it is the most awesome thing I’ve seen in my entire life. Every fake fanboy in the world has been like “SHE DOESN’T EVEN HAVE THE FORCE” and I’m like you fakers, you know nothing. And that scene was awesome and 100% how I imagine Carrie Fisher ascending to the heavens to watch over us all and bring sexual predators to justice. My only regret about that scene is that she wasn’t flipping off the First Order as she flew, but Disney and all that.

Porgs were... look, I don’t like the noise, but they weren’t obtrusive. They did not redeem themselves enough to receive billing alongside like. R2 and BB8, but they didn’t kind of reach out and poke you in the eye and force you to enjoy them. They just were there.

Like the SLUG SLOTH THING OKAY I’M SORRY I’M MOVING ON.

it makes a sound like it’s aroused and it’s like RIAN JOHNSON WE DO NOT NEED TO KNOW ABOUT YOUR LACTATION FETISH YOU WEIRDO

The subplot with Finn and Rose... it wasn’t a complete red herring, and it was interesting enough, but I think it’ll end up having way more payoff in the next film. Finn, Rose, and Poe aren’t as sidelined as a lot of spoilers led me to believe, and honestly? They have the most fun of anyone in the entire movie. ...well, Finn and Rose do. Poe kind of mutinies against Laura Dern because something or another, which

Actually, I rather liked it. Poe got way more characterization in this film than he did in the last, where he largely served to sort of follow orders, shoot things, and think naughty things about Finn. You learned things about him that you probably could also learn from reading the novels, but lbr, not everyone’s going to read the novels. Poe (and everyone, really) got a real arc in this film and got to be fantastically dynamic, and honestly, as much as I love and want to protect Finn and Rey, he’s my favorite of the new trio.

Back to the Finn and Rose plot. I felt like... you know, I felt like a lot of it was kind of the emotions that have been surrounding life since the current administration took office. There’s every form of resistance out there, and Finn gets a fantastic arc about that, where he’s initially just selfishly looking out for himself and Rey, but Rose kind of gives him some deeper insight into “look we’re not just rebelling against the First Order because it’s cool; if you just peel back the surface of all these places that seem to be doing okay with them in charge, you’re going to see that NOBODY IS FUCKING OKAY.” In a sense, she’s able to show him his privilege, and ultimately, his compassion gets him to a point he didn’t quite reach in the last movie--where he’s fighting for the Resistance/Rebellion (it kind of changed names at some point? Why are we quibbling about this?) not because Rey is there and it’s the thing to do but because he honestly believes in it. And that’s awesome.

Finn and Rose’s little smooch at the end was kiiiiiiiiinda weird, we’ll have to see where that goes next time. But Rose Tico is literally the cutest most wonderful sweet thing in the galaxy and please let us all protect her at all costs.

And then we get Rey, Luke, and Crylo Ron (who is ACTIVELY THE ACTUAL WORST see below). I’m still processing all of this, honestly, because it’s like... even though some unexpected things happened, it went pretty much exactly like you’d expect and hit all the beats you’d expect. And it wasn’t all filmed as well as the rest of the movie, which... bugged me. The rest of the movie looked really awesome, but these sequences just smacked of a director who was like “...I legit have no idea how to do this, so let’s just do it this way.”

For example, the Rey/Crylo braning thing (HEY MOVIES STOP DOING MY THING). It was weird, but it also like... wasn’t filmed well? You got the idea of how they were acting like crazy people in the real world, talking to and shooting at nobody, but it didn’t feel like they were talking to each other just like... I don’t even know. There are great ways of making that sort of scene work, and instead, it all just felt very lazy.

As a plot point it was... eh? I can see where the R3yl0s are coming from, but I’m also 7000% not on board because half the lines that nightmare douche used on Rey were lines that were used on me in the past by abusers. “You’re nobody. But not to me.” Like holy shit, you piece of garbage. You just get right to it, don’t you? He was literally every abusive piece of shit I dated in college telling me how broken they were and letting me think I could fix them. And bless her heart, Rey fell for it, just like we always do when we’re young and haven’t been bruised that way before. And bless her heart, she stopped herself from falling and was like... “yeah no, you’re the worst, byeeeee.”

(like literally slammed the door in his face)

So I mean, ship what you wanna ship, but I’m not going to jump on that bandwagon, and I’ll be honestly pissed if she does redeem him because what a sick fucking idea to perpetuate... that yes, you are the one to fix this awful person who’s told you that you’re nobody, your heroes are nobody, that they’re the only one who can make you awesome. NO, girls. You are awesome on your own; don’t listen to that stinking dump heap.

Anyway.

Luke’s arc was way better than I expected it to be, and I think Yoda helped with that along with the final scene (with the kid and the broom that I saw and was like SAMMMMMMM and that was not the last time I cried). I vastly appreciated his impact on Crying Rong because MY GOD DID IT REMIND ME HOW AWFUL HE IS. Like much props to J.J. Abrams and Rian Johnson for taking the literal worst male human in existence and turning him into the villain he is. It’s extraordinary. He’s so hateable.

BUT ANYWAY. His impotent raging against Luke, against himself, against everybody... boy is going down hard in the next film. He’s not going to get his ass redeemed because he won’t allow himself. He sees going full dark as the only true success and he will not let anyone turn him... not even Leia (which was my pet theory but now can’t happen, sob). And our entire theater whooped and cheered when it was revealed that Luke wasn’t actually on Crait. I mean, they also whooped and cheered when the lights went down, so that’s not saying much, BUT STILL.

Luke’s arc closing made me absolutely sob and it was... you know, I’m satisfied with it. Knowing that he was at least partly responsible for Ben turning, even if only because of an instinct, that made his self-imposed exile logical. It wasn’t that he’d failed; it was that he’d almost succeeded and by coming that close to succeeding in preventing Ben from going dark but ultimately failing, he made something worse than he could have imagined. Leia and Han would have forgiven him in a heartbeat, but he couldn’t forgive himself, and that was where his storyline went.

And what Yoda pointed out, and the gasps of delight and surprise when Yoda appeared on screen were fantastic.

Um. What else.

Hux kind of gets shafted, but oh my lord, Huxlo has wayyyyy more ammunition now than R3yl0, I AM JUST SAYING. I was half expecting him to say “choke me harder Daddy” when Crying Rain was taking over the First Order. I am not kidding.

Phasma got RIPPED OFF.

Snoke proved himself to be about as useful as a lamp covered in bubblegum, which was... annoying, honestly. His death was awesome, and the Praetorian Guards were SO COOL, but Snoke was useless. Absolutely pointless. And everyone applauded when Kerler Rern killed him but I was like nope. His death was preceded by Snoke telling Kerler Rern to complete his training, and I turned to Kyle and whispered, “Sith complete their training by killing their masters, shame nobody told Snoke that.” And sure enough...

I couldn’t find the Gary Fisher stand-in :(

BB8 is still the most precious and wonderful of things.

Laura Dern goes out like a badass, which made up for how much she bothered me to start. Poor Leia’s Purple Girlfriend :(

The dedication to Carrie made me sob while we all applauded.

And now I am dead. We’re taking Sam this weekend, so I’ll likely have more to say on Saturday.

#star wars #the last jedi #the last jedi spoilers #non spoiler review: look I don't know ok #I want to say yes I liked this but I'm still processing it

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