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ostrich-on-a-rampage-blog · 8 years ago

Note

Can you maybe do a crutchie/jesse fic where jack finds him crying because the depression of "I love all these people and they're all going to die" hit him and comforts him?

Okay, so I twisted the prompt a little bit. It isn’t Jack who finds him. But, I wanted to fit this prompt into the little narrative I’ve got going so far. Here is Part One, Part Two, Part Three, and Part Four. And, yes, there will be a Part Six. Trust me, I can’t end it where it is currently.

Jesse gently rubbed Charlotte’s nose, smiling softly when she nickered. “How are you doing, girl?” he asked, starting to brush the horse down. Charlotte shook her head, and Jesse chuckled. “Yeah? Me, too. Me, too, girl.” He hesitated, mid-brush, before shaking his head and continuing brushing the dappled gray mare down. “It’s been three weeks. Three weeks, Charlotte. I thought I would’ve been, I don’t know, over it, by now. Or, rather, I had hoped that I’d be over it.”

Charlotte blinked sympathetically.

“He was just… the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I just didn’t realize it until it was far too late. But, you get that, eh, girl?”

Charlotte nickered.

“It was my fault,” Jesse explained, as he gathered Charlotte’s feed. “I shouldn’t have ever left him. I knew I loved him, I just… I think I idolized Winnie, to an extent. Six years is a long time, Charlotte. It didn’t feel long, after, you know, a century, but it’s long for everyone else. It was stupid of me, but I just assumed that Winnie would be the exact same as what she used to be. I should never have been such an idiot.”

Charlotte nudged at Jesse, nearly causing him to drop the feed onto the floor. “I’m coming, I’m coming,” he told the horse, grinning as she nosed into the bucket of feed. The grin slipped. “It’s not like I can ever go back to him,” he told the horse, rubbing her neck as she ate. “He’s… He’s mortal, you know. He’ll have completely forgotten me and moved on within the next six years. Trust me, it always happens. Six years is so short… Six years is so long.”

“Hey, kid, stop your yapping, and get to work! We’se got another show tonight!”

Jesse startled at the call, jerking around to stare at the man gesturing outside of the temporary stables. “I know, I know. I was just–”

“This is me not caring,” the man said, pointing to his face, before leaving Jesse alone. “Stupid children…”

“Well, you heard the boss,” Jesse told Charlotte. “I gotta get going. Show’s tonight. And everyone’s all hopping-anxious because we missed the show last night. One mis-step and I’ll be kicked back to the street.”

Jesse patted Charlotte one last time, before heading out of the makeshift stable and towards where some of the workers were checking the large, white tent and the bleachers, ensuring that everything was set for the circus that night. After the blowout between him and Jack, Jesse had decided to join a circus and just travel the world. At least, until he had to move on to something else when people began to suspect his age.

“Hey, Jesse!” a younger boy ran up to Jesse, grinning widely. He had dark brown hair that flopped into his eyes with each movement, causing the boy to constantly be brushing it out away from his forehead. He had told Jesse that he was twelve, but Jesse was pretty certain that the boy was even younger. He had a gap in his teeth, but the boy had proudly proclaimed that his “big-kid teeth” were coming, any day now. “Where was you keeping yourself, huh?” the boy asked, brushing the too-long hair back behind his ears. “Pa was lookin’ for you.”

“Oh, was he, Nate?” Jesse asked. Nate’s father was the ringmaster of the circus: a stern, moustachioed man that had glared at Jesse, until Nate had convinced his father to allow Jesse to work with them. The young boy had quickly become the younger brother that Jesse had always wanted, and Jesse would do just about anything for the kid.

“Yeah,” Nate said, nodding seriously. “He said, ‘If that damn boy ain’t workin’, I’m kickin’ ‘im.’ He said that to me,” Nate said, even imitating his father’s gruff voice.

“You wouldn’t let him just kick me, would ya, Nate?”

Nate shook his head. “Never. I told pa that you’d be getting to work, so it’s all good.”

“Thanks, Nate,” Jesse said, ruffling Nate’s thick hair. “You’se the best little brother a boy could hope for.” He froze, mid-step, remembering similar words that Jack had said, back when he had first joined the newsboys of Lower Manhattan. Jesse swallowed thickly, before shaking his head and waving away Nate’s worried questions of his health. “I’m fine, kid. Let’s just get going. What did your pa need us to do, again?”

Jesse found himself back with Charlotte again. “I just… I just wish that there was a way that he wouldn’t die. I… Was it right? Not letting him drink from the Spring? Should I have… I don’t know, just let him live forever? Subject him to this special type of hell?” Jesse asked, swiping angrily at the tears that were starting to form. Charlotte remained, as usual, unhelpfully silent. “Nah, he’d’ve hated me. He’d start waking up each morning, wishing he were dead, and he’d start hating me.” Jesse laughed around a sob. “Not that I was even able to keep him from hating me this way, either. No matter what I do, he hates me. And now… Now, he gets to die. Oh, god, Charlotte. There’s gonna be a day that I wake up, seventeen still, and he’s just… He’s gonna be dead. He’s gonna die, Charlotte. Maybe I should’ve just let him drink from the Spring…” Jesse trailed off, taking a gulping breath. “Either way, I lose, Charlotte. This life ain’t ever treated me kindly, so I guess it suits that I would still… lose everything.” Jesse broke off, burying his head into his arms.

Usually, Jesse could try to hide the grief that dragged down at his shoulders. He was so skilled at just smiling and laughing, and pushing it all into the back of his mind. His family, the newsboys, the circus workers, no one had ever suspected… And, then there were days when he couldn’t seem to push Jack out of his mind, couldn’t get rid of the memories of the newsboys. Of the boys that would be dead, long before he ever found rest. And, he’d lock himself with Charlotte and cry until he felt numbed toward the pain, toward his awful lot in life.

“Uh, Jesse?”

Jesse jerked upright, staring in surprise at Nate. “Nate, what’re ya–”

“Are you crying?”

He swiped quickly at the tears that had already streaked down his cheeks. “I’m fine, Nate. Is the show starting soon? Do we need to start collecting tickets?”

“You was crying,” Nate accused.

“Yeah, maybe I was. But it don’t matter. Is you pa looking for me again?”

“What was you crying about?” Nate asked, helping Jesse stand up.

Jesse shrugged. “I don’t know. Nothing important.”

Nate crossed his arms to his chest. “I don’t believe you. You can tell me. What else is brothers for?”

“I just… You ever had someone you know die?”

“Yeah,” Nate said, nodding sadly. “My grandpa did. Is… Did one of your friends die?”

Jesse snorted humorlessly. “All of them.”

“Oh,” Nate said, his voice small. “I’m sorry.” He quickly pulled Jesse into a tight hug. “At least, I’m still here, yeah? And we’re friends.”

“Yeah, we’re friends,” Jesse agreed, though the phrase panged painfully at his heart. This was just one more kid who would die, leaving Jesse empty and alone. He tried to smile, though he wasn’t entirely sure that the motion was believable. If Nate noticed, he didn’t comment on it, instead, he grabbed Jesse’s hand. “Come on, Jesse. Let’s get going. The show’ll start soon.”

Jesse followed Nate to one of the entrances to the main tent, pasting a wide smile on his face. He started collecting tickets from the eager circus-goers, quickly losing count of the many families pouring into the tent. He smiled at the women, nodded to the men, laughed with the children, all in an effort to banish the ever-expanding emptiness within his chest. Once the majority of the guests had arrived, Jesse and Nate entered the tent, taking their seats at the far side. “You feeling better, Jesse?” Nate asked, taking a bite of the sandwich his pa had pressed into his hands, before making his way around the tent to prepare for his entrance.

“Yeah, I’m feeling better,” Jesse lied, watching as Charlotte galloped around the ring, her rider poised elegantly on the horse’s bare back. He allowed himself to smile a little bit. He did really love the circus. Jesse thought that this was one of the few places that he could let all his past go, and just focus on the joy and excitement that thrummed through the crowd.

The lion tamer was just beginning to lead the lions into the circle, when the band began to play “Stars and Stripes Forever.” Nate immediately paled, dropping his sandwich. “What is it?” Jesse asked, noticing the sudden change in Nate’s demeanor.

“The song,” Nate whispered. “It means something bad is happening.”

Jesse glanced around, trying to ascertain what was happening. There was no sign of chaos or danger, that Jesse had assumed would accompany the portending song. “Let’s just get out of here,” Jesse suggested, grabbing Nate’s arm and starting to lead him out of the big top.

By the time they had slipped out of the tent, Jesse could hear shouts and cries coming from the tent. People were beginning to flee, running like mad to escape the unknown danger. Jesse grabbed the arm of a man running, pulling him to a stop. “What’s happening?” Jesse demanded.

The man glanced back into the tent. “It’s a fire. And it’s spreading like hell.” He tore his arm out of Jesse’s grasp, dashing back into the night.

“A fire?” Nate asked, his eyes shining bright with fear and worry.

“Hey, it’s gonna be okay,” Jesse reassured Nate. He examined the tent, noticing that he could see the bright flames flickering behind the hordes of people struggling to escape what could probably be imminent death.

“Jesse!”

Jesse whirled around, surprised to see his brother and… and Jack running toward him. How… How had they found him? And why? “Crutchie!” Jack shouted, reaching him and pulling him into a tight hug. “Crutchie, I–I–”

“What are you guys doing here?” Jesse asked, cautiously returning Jack’s hug, but looking toward his older brother. He hadn’t seen Miles in six years, but now his older brother was scanning him, almost worriedly.

“Jesse, we had to find you and I was worried–” Miles started, but was interrupted by Nate.

Nate grabbed Jesse’s elbow, tugging him out of Jack’s arms. “Jesse, I don’t see my pa. I don’t see my pa!”

“He’s going to get out,” Jesse reassured him, turning back to Jack. He stared in wonder at the boy he had thought would have thought would never look in his direction again. “Jack, I–I didn’t mean…” Jesse trailed off, some sixth sense prickling uncomfortably. Something was wrong. It just felt… He turned around, but Nate wasn’t there. “Nate… Nate!” Jesse shouted, whirling in a tight circle, but not being able to find the younger boy. His eyes were inexplicably drawn to the tent, where he could catch glimpses of the flames, reaching up higher and higher in the tent.

Jesse immediately started toward the tent, but Jack grabbed his arm. “No, Crutchie, don’t,” Jack said, his voice strangely desperate.

“Don’t worry,” Jesse said, smiling back at Jack, who’s face was contorted with fear and horror. “I can’t die. But, Nate can and I can’t let that happen.” Jesse tore out of Jack’s grasp, ignoring his shouts for him to stop and wait. He couldn’t afford to do that, not when Nate had most likely run back into the burning inferno, unaware of the dangers.

Jesse pushed past the frantic crowds of circus-goers, scanning the crowd for a familiar mop of brown hair. “Nate!” he called out, trying to find the younger boy. “Nate!” Jesse edged into the tent, ignoring the sting of smoke and rancid smell of burning paraffin wax. He blinked tears away, trying to find Nate in the crowd. “Nate!” he shouted. He refused to leave the tent until Nate was safe. Nate was practically his younger brother, and Jesse would never forgive himself if the boy died.

A glob of paraffin dripped from the top of the tent, splattering on Jesse’s bare arm. He hissed in pain, immediately wiping the burning wax off of him, then he froze. Jesse hadn’t felt true pain for over a century. He wasn’t supposed to feel pain, he wasn’t supposed to get hurt. But, if he did… Did that mean that the immortality had worn off? It made sense: pain and death were interconnected. If he had one, surely he had the other…

Jesse shook the thoughts away. It didn’t matter. Nate was more important. He would find Nate, and they’d both get out of there. They’d be safe, they’d be alive. But, he had to find Nate first. “Nate!” Jesse shouted, renewing his frantic search, “Nate, please!” He began coughing, the thick smoke crowding at his lungs. What if he were to die? What would Jack and Miles think? Jesse cracked a sarcastic smile. Well, then Miles would know that the curse was finally broken. “Nate!”

There! Across the tent, Jesse spotted Nate, looking dazed as he watched the flames curl up the sides of the tent. “Nate!” Jesse shouted, dashing to the younger boy. He grabbed him, and started tugging the younger boy to the entrance of the tent.

Nate tried to shake himself out of Jesse’s arms. “My pa! I haven’t found my pa!”

“We’ll find him later,” Jesse grunted, working his way closer and closer to safety. There was still a large crowd of people stampeding to the entrance, screams echoing louder than the intense crackling of the fire. The heat was pressing against Jesse like an actual physical force, and he was tempted to just lay down and sleep, give up. Jesse pushed the temptation away, struggling against Nate’s frantic attempts to break free and continue his search for his father. “Come on,” Jesse muttered, “we just gotta get out there and then everything will be okay.”

He merged within the crowd, finally just hoisting Nate up into his arms and carrying him, bridal style. Nate still fought, but the movements were slowing, slacking. Jesse glanced down at the younger boy, fearfully, before continuing his trek forward. Nate’s eyes were blinking lethargically up at him, confusion and heat making the orbs glassy. They had to make it out. He was being jostled by each side, and then suddenly, he was falling forward, the ground rushing up to him. Jesse managed to catch himself before he fell on top of Nate. He stayed like that, propped on all fours, breathing heavily. But, before Jesse could grab Nate and get up, someone tripped over him, and soon more and more people were tripping and falling in their haste to get out of the burning tent. Someone landed on him, and then someone else. Jesse tried to protect Nate, tried to get up, but then there was someone else on him. He couldn’t hold them up, he couldn’t–

Something hit Jesse’s head, and all went black.

#jesse/crutchie conspiracy theory #part five #newsies #tuck everlasting #now it gets exciting #loosely based around the events of the hartford circus fire in 1944 #jackcrutchie #also nate is my absolute favorite

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ostrich-on-a-rampage-blog · 8 years ago

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If you want maybe for a part 3 you could have Miles looking for Jesse????

Gosh, this was asked for so long ago. I’m sorry that it’s taken me so long to get to this, but here it is! You can find all previous parts by following these links: Part One, Part Two, and Part Three.

Jack frowned, immediately tearing his drawing into shreds. Once again, he had been mindlessly sketching and the careful shading had turned into familiar smiling eyes, a wide grin, and hair that never stayed put: Crutchie. It had been nearly three weeks since Crutchie had left. After you told him to, a bitter voice reminded Jack. “I don’t care,” Jack muttered to himself, “I wanted him gone. I didn’t want someone like him ‘round me.”

“Didn’t want someone like who?” Romeo asked, coming up to where Jack had been sketching at the dining room table.

“Nothing, Romeo,” Jack replied, stuffing the shredded drawing into his pocket before Romeo could see exactly what he had been working on. All the newsboys had been upset at Crutchie’s sudden disappearance, and had initially blamed Jack. Which, he supposed, had been fair. But, now the boys had basically moved on and Jack wasn’t exactly eager to remind Romeo of his missing brother. No, they would all just move on and never think of Crutchie Morris and his ridiculously sunny personality ever again.

“Whatever,” Romeo muttered, before gesturing to the front room of the Lodging House. “Some guy’s here. He’s asking for you.”

“Me?” Jack asked, tucking his pencil behind his ear and following Romeo to the front room.

“Yeah, you. And a Jesse. I told him we don’t have anyone named Jesse, but he refuses to leave.”

“Oh,” Jack said, stopping short. Someone was here for Jesse. Jesse, who he had sent away. Jesse, who he had yelled at, shouted at, turned away. Jesse, who had left without a backward glance. Jesse, who you still have feelings for, a small voice spoke up. Romeo glanced up at him in confusion, but Jack waved the younger boy’s concern away. “Yeah, I’ll talk to him.”

The man standing in the doorway was tall, much taller than Crutchie. He had dark brown hair and a firm jaw. He wasn’t smiling and his arms were crossed against his chest. “Are you Jack? Jack Kelly?” the man demanded when Jack approached.

“Yeah, I am.”

“I’m looking for my brother, Jesse.”

“I take it that you’re Miles?”

Miles looked taken aback. “He told you my name? What else did he tell you?” he asked, suddenly suspicious.

“Everything,” Jack confirmed.

Miles pinched the bridge of his nose. “Of course he did. Stupid kid doesn’t know how to keep a secret.” He sighed, before facing Jack once more. “Where is he? I’ve got to talk to him.”

“I don’t know.” Those three words felt impossible to say, to admit. He had spent nearly the entire time that Crutchie had been gone, trying to convince himself that he would not miss the boy, that he was glad his best friend–his love–was gone. And, now all those carefully constructed lies seemed to be falling, shattering, and Jack was left standing, his mind heavy with the knowledge. Oh, how he wished he knew where Crutchie was. But, what would he do if he knew? Would he actually ask Crutchie to return? Would the other boy even want to after what Jack had said to him?

“You don’t know? What do you mean you don’t know?”

“I–” The words lodged uncomfortably in Jack’s throat. It wasn’t guilt. Jack didn’t feel guilty. Not when Crutchie had deserved it. After all, he had been the one to betray Jack. But, maybe… “He left. We… sorta fought and he left.”

“Left where?” Miles demanded.

“I don’t know. He… wouldn’t tell me.” Jack glanced at his feet, before asking, “Why are you looking for him?”

Miles rubbed a hand across his face, suddenly haggard. “They’re tearing up the forest in Tree Gap. The Fosters sold the woods and they’re building a new neighborhood there.” When Jack rolled his eyes, Miles reached forward, grabbing Jack’s upper arm. “You don’t understand. The Spring is gone.”

“Gone as in…?”

Miles glanced at the newsboys curiously observing their interaction, before grabbing Jack’s arm. Lowering his voice, he asked, “Is there somewhere more private that we can talk?” Jack nodded and led Miles outside, away from the other boys. Once they were out of earshot, Miles continued, “It’s gone as in we’re mortal. I need to find Jesse before he does something stupid, thinking that he’s still immortal.”

“How’d you figure that out?” Jack asked.

Sighing heavily, Miles explained, “Pa was in a hunting accident.”

Jack felt as if his stomach had dropped to the floor below him. It wasn’t as if he were particularly close to Crutchie’s family, but the other boy had told him stories about his brother, his parents, and Jack couldn’t bear the thought of Crutchie’s dad just being… gone. “He’s not–”

“No, he’s not dead. It was bad for a while, though.” Miles snorted. “Bad enough that we realized we weren’t immortal anymore. Where’s Jesse?”

Jack shook his head slowly. “I–I don’t know. He might’ve… He might’ve gone to the Arctic Tundra. That’s, uh, what he had told me last time we, uh, kinda fought.”

Miles eyes flared up with a myriad of emotions, the most prominent anger and… fear? The older Tuck edged closer to Jack, before suddenly stopping, and glancing up at the Lodging House. About ten different newsboys were posted at the windows, watching the pair. “Do you have somewhere even more private to talk?” he demanded, his eyebrows inching towards each other.

“Uh, yeah, the rooftop,” Jack offered, before leading Miles up to the roof. As soon as he got to the top, however, Jack regretted choosing the roof as a place to discuss Jesse’s whereabouts. An all-too-familiar crutch was propped up at the edge of the roof, and the sight of the object burned hot and painful in Jack’s stomach. “What did you want to talk with me about that the other boys couldn’t see?” Jack asked.

The first punch caught him completely off guard. Jack stumbled backwards, his hand immediately pressed against his stinging jaw. “What the hell?” Jack hissed, glaring at Miles, who simply glared back.

“You fought with my little brother? I had expected more of you, after the adoration Jesse rained on you,” he explained.

Jack noticed that the older man’s fists remained balled and lifted slightly, prepared for another attack. “Yes, we got in a fight. He left me for some girl in New Hampshire. I was upset, I yelled a little bit. It was never anything huge.”

“Then why did you run him off?” Miles challenged. “He could actually die now. Do you not get that?”

“I–that was the first fight. He left me for that girl. And then he came back, but I was his second choice. He always preferred the New Hampshire girl. I got mad. We both yelled a little bit. I told him to leave. I–I didn’t mean…” Jack trailed off, unsure of what he hadn’t meant. Because he had meant for Crutchie to leave. He had been mad. He was still mad. Are you? that familiar mocking voice questioned.

Miles shook his head, jerking his hand through his hair. “Don’t you understand? If he left for the Arctic Tundra, he will die. Jesse cannot survive conditions like that. He doesn’t realize it; he won’t realize it, until it’s too late. You’ve killed my brother!” Miles shouted, shoving Jack backwards, so that the younger boy fell to the ground, his elbows scraping roughly against the rooftop. For a moment, all was silent beyond Miles harsh breaths. The older Tuck ran a hand down his face, and Jack took a moment to just examine the older man. He looked beyond exhausted: he looked hopeless, and that scared Jack more than he cared to admit.

“I–I didn’t–” Jack tried to explain, hating the guilt that surged up within him.

“He said he loved you and now you’ve gone and murdered him!”

“He– He said he loved me?” Jack asked, softly. Suddenly, he couldn’t get Crutchie’s eyes out of his head, the way he had looked at him, pleaded with him, to just let him stay. And Jack had turned him away, had sent him off to his doom, if Miles was correct.

Miles rolled his eyes. “Yes. And now look what you’ve done. Why’d you even send him away?”

Jack shrugged, the motion heavy with regret and grief. “He wouldn’t let me drink from the Spring.”

“Oh, great,” Miles muttered sarcastically. “The kid finally wisens up and that’s what kills him.”

“I loved him!” Jack shouted, trying to get the older man to understand why he wasn’t in the wrong. He couldn’t be in the wrong. Crutchie was wrong. Crutchie was at fault. “I loved him and I wanted to live with him for forever. But he wouldn’t let me drink from the Spring.”

“Did you ever stop to think why he wouldn’t let you?” Miles demanded. “Because he loved you! He didn’t want you to suffer the way our whole family has suffered. Look, maybe you didn’t see it, but my brother loved you. That girl, Winnie, he knew her for two days. How long has he stayed with you? Winnie was a crush, a momentary fixation. You were different, Jack.” He snorted. “Not that that matters, though, if we can’t even find the damn kid.”

“We can find him,” Jack whispers, his chest tightening as the mistake pressed heavily against his shoulders. “I won’t stop until we find him.”

“That’s only if he manages to stay alive before we can find out where he’s disappeared to.”

#jesse/crutchie conspiracy theory #tuck everlasting #newsies #jackcrutchie #look we got some Miles #tell me what you think!!!#my fanfiction

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ostrich-on-a-rampage-blog · 8 years ago

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Me: Wow, Ostrich, that’s a lot of fic requests in your in box. You should probably get on those now that it’s summer.

Also me: How about something that doesn’t even answer a single request.

In all honesty, I tried to complete the jesse/crutchie conspiracy theory requests I have. And then, this happened. Basically, it’s a bridge before I get to the requests in my inbox. We’re looking at (right now) a five part story. Part four should actually be here soon, because I’m almost done with that guy.

That being said, Part One is here and Part Two is here.

“Okay, but here’s the thing,” Jesse explained, his head leaning on Jack’s shoulder, “France is actually very over-rated. Or, rather, Paris is.” The night sky stretched above them, a light breeze ruffling Jesse’s hair. Jack’s arm was draped across Jesse’s shoulders, pulling him close. It had only been a couple of weeks since Jesse had told Jack that he was immortal, since he had left to go to Winnie, since Jack had welcomed him back, despite the betrayal that still curdled Jesse’s stomach. “Have you ever had escargot?”

“Nah, I ain’t even heard of it. Sounds all fancy-like.”

“It’s snails.”

“Oh, nasty,” Jack quickly responded. “Have you actually eaten a snail?”

“I did. It was okay,” Jesse said, falling silent as Jack rubbed his thumb back and forth over the other boy’s hand. He glanced down, watching Jack’s thumb for a moment, before gently squeezing Jack’s hand and continuing, “Yeah, I even convinced my brother to try it. He hated it.” Jesse laughed hoarsely, shaking his head. “Just like he hated everything I wanted to do. You know, I tried to tell him about you. Wrote a letter.” Jesse shook his head. “He never even bothered replying.”

Jack pulled Jesse closer to him. “You don’t really talk about your brother all that much,” he observed.

“Miles and I… We used to be really close. And then everything with the Spring happened. I think he blames me for our immortality. If I hadn’t… I drank first, and everyone else followed after. And then, we wouldn’t have realized we were actually immortal if I hadn’t fallen from the tree. After that, Miles’ family left him. He… He blames me for that, too. And I deserve it. It was my fault.”

“How could that possibly be your fault?” Jack asked. “Whether you drank first or not, your whole family would have ended up becoming immortal. And eventually you would have discovered your immortality. So, if your brother doesn’t like you for that, then that’s his loss. I think you’re great.”

Jesse shrugged. “It’s whatever, Jack. I mean, I don’t even need my family.” He smiled softly. “I have you, instead.”

“Yeah, you got me,” Jack agreed. He frowned when Jesse pulled out of his arms. “What’s wrong?”

“How long do I have you, Jack? A couple years? Maybe ten, if I’m lucky? You’re going to age, Jack. You’re going to die.” Jesse sniffed, rubbing angrily at his nose. “And then I’ll be alone all over again.”

Jack pulled Jesse back into his chest, running a hand through Jesse’s hair. “We… I… That can be fixed,” he whispered.

Jesse’s heart fluttered. Jack was already seventeen. There would be no waiting, there would be no worry that Jack would move on. They could be together. Jesse could have someone to call his own, for forever. He’d never have to worry about being alone, about watching those he loved die. Maybe, for the first time in forever, Jesse could truly be happy.

But, no. It would never work. As much as Jesse hated to admit it, Miles was right. Miles was always right. He couldn’t force Jack into giving up death, giving up the whole purpose of life, just for him. Jesse shook his head, though the motion pained him. “No, Jack. You can’t. I won’t… I won’t let you.”

“But you’d’ve let that girl?”

“Jack,” Jesse tried, but Jack wouldn’t listen.

“No, this is a couple weeks ago all over again,” Jack muttered, standing up and beginning to pace back and forth across the roof. “I’m your second choice, aren’t I?” he demanded, angrily.

“No--”

“No, shut up, Crutch. You never really loved me; you settled for me. You settled.” Mockingly, Jack pitched his voice higher to imitate Jesse, “‘Oh, I guess I can’t have this perfect girl from perfect little New Hampshire, but, hey, there’s this stupid, grubby newsboy and I guess I can settle for him until that girl can drink from the Spring and we can be together forever.’ Happily ever after,” Jack spat. “Well, I’m sorry that I’m not good enough for you. I’m sorry that I wasn’t what you wanted. But, I’m what you have.” Jack turned away, glowering. “Or, rather, I was what you had.”

“Jack,” Jesse started, his voice thick and wet. “Please--”

“I had hoped,” Jack started, before cutting himself off with a low growl. “You know, when you came back, I almost just turned you away. I was so angry. So angry. You left me for some girl you had known six years ago. I loved you, Crutchie. And, apparently, you didn’t love me back.”

Jesse shook his head. “No, I did. Jack, I did. I do. I love you, Jack.”

“You left me!” Jack shouted.

“I came back!” Jesse tried to explain. “I was wrong. I know that. I regret it more than anything else I’ve ever done. If I could go back and change one thing, it wouldn’t be the Spring; it would be leaving you. I wouldn’t. I swear, Jack, I’m sorry.”

“When you came back, I almost turned you away again. I didn’t want to get hurt again. I couldn’t get hurt again. And… And then, you just looked at me and I couldn’t say no.” Jack shook his head, snorting self-deprecatingly. “I was always weak.” His eyes shot up, fiery. “I could never protect myself. And now it’s happening all over again. I let you come back,” Jack hissed. “I let you come back and now you just want to betray me all over again.”

“I know you let me come back and I love you. I love you, Jack. I’m sorry, I’m so very sorry. I love you, Jack and I can’t explain, but I can’t be without you. I’m sorry, Jack. I’m so sorry, but I don’t want you to be stuck as an immortal because I love you,” Jesse tried to explain, words rushed and jumbled.

Jack shook his head, the movement suddenly tired. “I don’t care, Crutch. Or Jesse. Whatever the hell your name is. I don’t care. Just… just leave. I should never have let you come back.”

“Jack,” Jesse tried, not even bothering to wipe away the tears that ran freely down his cheeks. He reached towards Jack, but the newsboy shoved his hand away. “Jack, please--”

“Get away,” Jack commanded. “I don’t want to see you ever again.”

For a moment, Jesse remained where he was seated, praying that this was just a dream, just an awful nightmare. The breeze chilled his skin, goosebumps rising and solidifying the reality of the situation. It was real. Jack really wanted him gone. Gone, forever.

Guess, he’d actually get to visit the Arctic Tundra.

#jesse/crutchie conspiracy theory #newsies #tuck everlasting #hello angst my old friend #my fanfiction #my writing

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ostrich-on-a-rampage-blog · 8 years ago

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Jackcrutchie with the Jesse/Crutchie theory????? Maybe with like Jack finding out about Jesse/Crutchie being immortal??

Hello, anon. Were you wanting something angsty and sad? Oh, good. ‘Cuz you got something angsty and sad.

Jesse stiffened when he woke up. Whose arms were around him? Who was touching him? What was– He paused, recognizing the familiar snoring. Jack. Jesse sighed, cursing softly. He had hoped that Jack wouldn’t have wanted to sleep together last night. It would make it all the more difficult to escape without alerting Jack of his attentions.

Slowly, Jesse extricated himself from Jack’s arms. He was dismayed at just how much colder it was away from Jack and Jesse was half-tempted to just lay back down and curl up against Jack. But, he couldn’t do that. Today was the day that he had been waiting for for years. Six, to be exact. And Jesse wasn’t going to miss it for the world.

“Crutch? What’re ya doin’? The bell ain’t rung yet; come lay back down.”

Jesse froze at Jack’s sleep-slurred words. He had hoped to have been on a train to New Hampshire before Jack even woke up. Jesse knew that he should have gotten up earlier, but it had been so nice to just lay in Jack’s arms and now he would suffer the consequences of his own personal weaknesses. “Jack, I– I gotta go.”

“You can wait. The sun ain’t even up. What’re ya gonna do? Just stand by the gate for eternity?”

Jesse snorted. “You don’t know nothing about eternity…” He shook his head, before continuing, “No, Jack, I really gotta go. I– I promised someone…”

Jack sat up. He slung an arm around Jesse’s shoulders. “Okay, then, I’ll come along. Where you gotta get yourself to? Please tell me you’re not meeting up from someone in the Bronx. I can’t stand those kids.”

“No, it’s… farther. I gotta get back to New Hampshire.”

“You’ve been to New Hampshire?” Jack asked in surprise.

Jesse smiled weakly. “I’ve been a lotta places,” he admitted. For years, he had wanted to tell Jack the truth, tell him everything, but he couldn’t. It hurt, knowing that he would just have to leave and Jack would die and they would probably never see each other again. Now, however, the words crowded the tip of his tongue, fighting for recognition, for someone beyond Winnie and his family to understand. “I… Jack, I gotta tell you a secret.”

Jack nodded, pulling Jesse close. “Of course, Crutch. What’s on your mind?”

“I can’t die,” Jesse blurted out. With that sudden truth, every other word seemed to tumble out of his mouth, without his own volition. “I can’t die and neither can my family. Oh, I got a family. I got a Ma and a Pa and an older brother. His name is Miles. Uh, my name is Jesse. I lied when I said I didn’t have one. I like Crutchie mighty fine, but my real name is Jesse. And I can’t die. And…” Jesse hesitated. This truth seemed sharper. “And, I ain’t ever needed that crutch. It was just… a disguise.”

“You was faking?” Jack asked

Jesse could detect no maliciousness in the tone, so he nodded. “Yeah. I needed a new life. Just for a couple years. Just until I could go back.”

Jack gently kissed Jesse’s forehead. “That’s okay. I love you no matter what your name or your story is.”

“I…” Jesse stumbled. “I–I…” Suddenly, he couldn’t seem to get the words out. He did love Jack, didn’t he? Except, for some reason, all he could picture was Winnie Foster. She would be seventeen now. She would drink from the Spring. They would live together, forever. Happily ever after. Jack’s arms around him burned and Jesse pushed out of the hug. He stood up and started pacing, not even bothering to use his familiar crutch anymore.

“You… you really can walk just fine.”

Jesse was caught off guard. “Oh, yeah,” he said, glancing down at his perfectly good legs. “I guess that’s one of the perks of immortality. You can’t really get hurt.”

“So… you’re immortal?” Jack asked.

“Yeah,” Jesse said, but he could tell that Jack didn’t truly believe him. No one ever believed him. Winnie believed him.

“That’s… How? How are you immortal?”

“Jack, this really doesn’t matter right now. I’m going, okay? I don’t think I’ll ever be coming back.”

“And, like I said, I’ll be coming along.”

Jesse shook his head. “No, Jack, I really don’t think you should come.”

“Why not?”

He hesitated for a moment. The truth was edging against his tongue, clacking against his teeth. Just opening his mouth would release a deluge of words that Jesse just didn’t want to deal with right now. Jack watched Jesse patiently, waiting for an answer. “I… I don’t want you to come because I’m going to go meet up with the girl I love.”

There. It was out in the open. The words hung between Jesse and Jack, heavy and obtuse. Jack’s face registered surprise, before all emotion was wiped away. Jesse looked away as Jack asked, “You… You’re going back to find a girl?”

“Yeah, but, Jack, please understand. I’ve been stuck on this stupid planet for 108 years. And I finally found someone. I finally found someone. We had to wait until she was seventeen, the same age as me,” Jesse sang softly, trailing off. When he spoke again, the words were even quieter. “We’re gonna get married, Jack. I-I love her.”

“What about me? Don’t you love me?”

“Jack, I… Of course, I do, but Winnie…”

Jack snorted, roughly jerking his hands through his hair. “I was an idiot,” he muttered. “I never shoulda… You played me. Did you ever care? Did you ever care what I thought? Or was this always just about you?” Jack demanded.

Jesse shoulders slumped. Miles’ words from earlier, about how he was always selfish, swirled around his head. “I-I’m sorry, Jack. I did love you. I do, still. But… do you believe in soulmates?”

“I thought I did,” Jack muttered. His eyes shot up to Jesse’s, dark obsidian. “But, I guess that ain’t true.”

“No, Jack, you gotta understand. Winnie–”

“I don’t care,” Jack bit out. “Go, find your perfect girl. Get married, have a passel of kids. See if I care. Just don’t come back.”

“Jack,” Jesse tried again, but Jack waved him away. Jesse recognized that he was no longer wanted and started for the ladder off of the roof. “Jack, I do love you. I just…” Jesse trailed off, not knowing what he could say. He tapped the top of the ladder twice, before shaking his head and continuing down. He left the crutch with Jack.

Jesse felt as if his heart had been ripped, still beating from his chest. Winnie didn’t remember him. Or if she did, she didn’t care. She was getting married to the stupid little detective. Hugo, or something. She was just as beautiful as ever, but that smile that Jesse had fallen in love with, was focused on Hugo, not him.

Jesse turned away quickly, not sure where he was going. He wanted more than anything, to return to Jack, who actually loved him. But, he couldn’t. Jack had told him as much. Jesse contemplated if there was any way that he could explain to Jack just how sorry and how wrong he had been. He snorted, ignoring the tears that pricked at the back of his eyes. Jesse knew the answer to that. It was in Jack’s hardened eyes, in his shaking voice.

He could never return.

Once again, Jesse Tuck was alone.

AN: If you guys really like this one, let me know. I’m considering a Part 2.

#newsies #tuck everlasting #jesse/crutchie conspiracy theory #jackcrutchie #angst #my fanfiction #my writing

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ostrich-on-a-rampage-blog · 8 years ago

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NSJSSJXBBDSHNDC FACK I'VE BEEN IN LOVE WITH THE CRUTCHIE/JESSE THEORY SINCE I FIRST SAW THAT POST IN THE HEIGHT OF THE TUCK FANDOM LAST SUMMER & NOW I FOUND YOUR FICS & HOLY SHIT ARE THEY AMAZING! YOU CHARACTERIZE JESSE JUST LIKE I DO & I FUGGIN LOVE YOU! MAYBE IF YOU WANT TO WRITE MORE MAYBE MILES & JACK LEAVE TO FIND JESSE?

Thank you so much!! I’m glad you’re enjoying everything. (And I definitely agree. I wholeheartedly support the theory that Crutchie and Jesse are actually the same person.) I actually am working on a Part 5 about that! I don’t exactly when I’ll post it, because I’m simultaneously working on Chapter Five of Crutchie, Cursed and a couple of jackcrutchie one-shots, but it will be out there soon(ish)!! Thank you once again!!

#jesse/crutchie conspiracy theory #my fanfiction #crutchie cursed #basically I'm just writing a literal crap ton #all i do is write

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ostrich-on-a-rampage-blog · 8 years ago

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PLEASE DO A PART 2 OF YOUR CRUTCHIE/JESSE FIC THING I NEED IT

Ask and ye shall receive. This isn’t super great, but I wrote it and meh, I’ll just post it.

Part One can be found here.

Jesse knew that he should just give up, run away, never look back, never remember. He couldn’t. He couldn’t just walk away without one last, lingering glance. All that Jesse wanted was to see Jack one last time. Then he would disappear to spend the next couple decades in the Arctic Tundra, where no one would bother him, where his family wouldn’t think to look for him, where he could relish in the elements that would perfectly reflect the raging, frozen sorrow constricting his heart. If he could catch one final glimpse of Jack, then he would have something to cling to, a memory to cautiously, mournfully thumb.

Jesse slowly made his way through the crowded New York streets, sticking to the edges of alleyways and shadowed store-fronts. It was dangerous, Jesse knew that. He could run into someone who knew him as Crutchie and who would expect him to be unable to walk without the crutch he had left behind. But, it would be worth it, just to see, just to remember. He was close. Jack usually sold on this street, so–

“Hey, Crutchie!”

Jesse froze, instinctively grabbing the wall beside him as if he were using it as support to walk. He carefully twisted his leg back into its expected position and turned to face whoever had recognized him.

Race frowned at Jesse as he caught up. “Where’ve you been, Crutch? We’ve been lookin’ all over for ya. And where’s your crutch?”

“I’ve been around,” Jesse muttered. “Um, and I don’t know where my crutch is.” Which wasn’t a lie. Jack could’ve tossed it out, for all he knew.

“Well, let me help you back to the Lodging House,” Race offered, stepping up and helping Jesse put his arm around Race’s shoulder, to use the other boy for balance.

Jesse hastily pushed Race away. “Uh, no. No, I don’t think–” He cut himself off, shaking his head bitterly. “I can’t go back to the Lodging House. I ain’t… allowed.”

“Says who,” Race demanded.

“I don’t know… Says Jack?”

“Well, Jack don’t dictate who I can and cannot bring back. So, maybe I’m bringing you back as a friend, think about that? Jack can’t tell me that I can’t have a friend over.”

“Race, it’s really okay. I’m just gonna go–”

“Where? Where’re ya gonna go?”

Jesse shrugged. “Away?” he tried.

“Nice try,” Race muttered, resituating himself so that Jesse could lean on him. “Let’s get ya back to the Lodging House. Just stay for the night and then, in the morning, if ya still feel like leaving, you can go.”

After three years of living with the newsies, Jesse knew that Race would not back down. “Fine. Just for one night,” Jesse relented. He knew that he shouldn’t have even returned to Manhattan. He should’ve just left after realizing that Winnie wouldn’t ever reciprocate those feelings. And now he’d have to face Jack about everything that had happened and he didn’t really look forward to that.

As they neared the Lodging House, Jesse’s fear grew, edging at his stomach, bony and obtuse. “Look, Race, I really don’t think I should–”

“Why not?” Race interrupted. “You’se part of us.”

“Jack and I… We had a fight and I don’t think–”

“I’m sure that Jack’s missed you these past couple days. He probably didn’t mean for ya to run off like that,” Race reassured.

Jesse wasn’t as certain. He couldn’t seem to forget the way that Jack had stared at him after he had announced that he was leaving to find Winnie. Jack’s eyes had widened only a fraction. If Jesse hadn’t known him so well, he would have missed the raw pain and grief that flashed across the brown orbs, before they darkened into cold, impenetrable stones. “We’ll see,” Jesse whispered, allowing Race to open the door and help him inside.

The door shut behind him, the noise barely noticeable over the rushing in Jesse’s ears. Across the room, Jack stood up, staring at Jesse leaning against Race. “Look who I found on the streets!” Race announced, but Jesse could barely comprehend the words.

Jack’s eyes were hard and emotionless. His jaw twitched slightly and, for a moment, Jesse thought he was going to speak up and say something. Instead, Jack walked straight past Jesse and Race, not even bothering to voice whatever thoughts were clearly on his mind. “Ja–” Jesse tried, but Jack was already out of the door.

Race’s smile fell. “Oh. Guess you guys really did fight.”

“Can I go now?” Jesse asked softly. “I–I don’t belong round here no more.”

“You don’t want to just stay the night?”

Jesse shook his head. “I think it’d be best if I just get going now.”

“Can I help ya get somewhere?” Race asked.

“Nah. I can make it. I’ll be fine. Thanks, though,” Jesse added, limping towards the door. Once he was outside, he could just run and never turn back. He got his wish; he saw Jack one last time. Except, this wasn’t how he had wanted to remember Jack: eyes hard, jaw firm, no regret.

“Will we see you around?”

Jesse slowly shook his head. “Probably not. I think I’m gonna go… somewhere else.” He stepped past Race, pretending to balance on the door frame as he opened the door. This had all been a horrid mistake. Jesse should never have returned. He shut the door behind him, pausing for a moment. Jesse allowed the grief and regret to sweep through him. Sighing heavily, Jesse stumbled forward, intent on leaving all of Manhattan behind.

Just as he had rounded the corner, out of view of the Lodging House windows, a voice called out, “Don’t tell me you’re leavin’ us again.”

Jesse turned slowly. “Jack,” he began, his voice breaking on the name. “I… I’m sorry, but… You don’t want me round here.”

Jack approached Jesse, the familiar crutch in his hand. “I was gonna get this for you. Thought it’d be easier than just leaning on Race for the rest of the night.”

“Jack,” Jesse whispered, his throat tightening with emotion.

“You wanna come up to the roof, talk a bit?” Jack offered.

Jesse could only nod, following Jack up the rickety fire escape. Maybe things would be okay? Maybe he could manage to fix it all? Maybe Jack would understand? Hopes and half-wishes swirled around Jesse’s head, his stomach tightening with anticipation.

Once they had settled down beside each other–Jesse was hyper-conscious of the space that Jack left between the pair–Jack spoke up. “So… What happened with that girl?”

“She… She found someone else. Six years is a long time. I never shoulda expected anything different,” he muttered. “I’m sorry, Jack. I shouldn’t’ve left you. I should’ve just stayed here. And now I’ve gone and ruined the one good thing I ever got.”

Jack made some noncommittal noise, before asking, “What’s your plan now?”

“Arctic Tundra,” Jesse told him bitterly. “I wasn’t supposed to even come here, but…” Jesse trailed off. He wouldn’t tell Jack any of that. “Anyway,” he continued, much quicker, “my family wouldn’t look for me there, so I wouldn’t be bothered. Um, I was planning on staying there for a couple decades, until…”

Silence stretched between Jack and Jesse, until Jack laughed, the sound startling Jesse. “Just you, an igloo, and a family of penguins?”

“And a polar bear,” Jesse joked back, smiling for the first time in a couple days.

“It’s no Santa Fe, but it might be nice,” Jack conceded.

Jesse frowned again. “It’s not supposed to be nice, really. It’s a punishment, I guess.”

“So, you’re really immortal?” Jack asked, changing the topic.

Jesse snorted humorlessly, examining his fingers. “Yeah… Been like this for… a long time.”

“How’d it happen?”

“There’s this spring over in New Hampshire and my family all drank from it. We stopped aging. Now, it’s just me and Miles, Ma and Pa. I had hoped that, maybe, Winnie would drink, too, and I wouldn’t be alone, but…” Jesse trailed off. “It sucks. Immortality,” he quickly clarified, mortified that Jack might think he was still talking about Winnie. “Everyone you care about just… dies. Everyone. I mean, I know you understand what it’s like, but, it’s more than that. You only have to deal with one group of friends dying. Each time I move somewhere and make new friends, I know they’re going to die. And I’ll be stuck, alone. Again. It’s why I try not to spend too long with a group of people.” Jesse lowered his voice. “It’s why I wasn’t supposed to… to love you.”

Jack was quiet for a moment before asking, “How old are you, really?”

“108 years. 109 next May,” Jesse replied, sniffing.

“Wow,” Jack breathed. “So, will you tell me about all the adventures you must’ve had?” he requested. Jesse nearly shook his head and made some excuse to leave, but Jack’s arm gently settling over his shoulders stopped him.

“Yeah. Yeah, I will,” Jesse agreed, as Jack pulled him closer. He grinned, carefully leaning his head against Jack’s familiar shoulder. “You ever heard of the Pyramids in Egypt?” he began. “See, there was this one time when I…”

When Jesse awoke, he first noticed the chill that swept through his shirt. He was alone. Once again. Jesse clenched his fist, squeezing his eyes shut. He could’ve sworn that he’d fallen asleep with Jack’s arms around him. It had all been a dream, no doubt. Jack would’ve left to go sell his papes, live his life. And Jesse would be left to gather up the shards of what had once been a wonderful life and crawl away to lick his wounds away from prying eyes.

Jesse didn’t completely remember what had happened the night before. He had told Jack everything. All the truths and realities that Jesse kept hidden were laid out for Jack. But, now, he couldn’t remember Jack’s reaction. Had the other boy still been mad? Had he been grateful? Jesse wasn’t sure anymore.

Sighing, Jesse pulled himself up to a sitting position. He’d want to get out of here just as soon as possible.

“I was wondering when you’d get up.”

Jesse turned rapidly, giving himself whiplash. He winced, but drove the pain to the back of his mind. “Jack? What’re ya–”

Jack smiled and finished buttoning up his vest. He grabbed the crutch that had been leaning up against the railing of the roof and examined it, before tossing it to Jesse. “Thought you might need this, if you’re gonna stick around and sell papes with the rest of us. That is,” Jack continued, “if we’re interesting enough to keep you from swimming ‘cross the Amazon or exploring some Arctic caves. Or something crazy like that.”

Jesse caught the crutch, smiling. “Don’t worry. You’re loads more interesting than alligators or penguins.”

AN: So, that’s what I got for that little story. I don’t expect there to be a Part 3, but if you guys are interested with me playing around some more with Jesse/Crutchie conspiracy theory, send me some prompts.

#newsies #tuck everlasting #jesse/crutchie conspiracy theory #part 2!!#i really just like this conspiracy theory #probably a little too much...

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