#crack and angst

[annabtg]

Bad Egg

a @jilymicro-oops for @nena-96

The day had dawned with the promise of perfection. A chilly but bright morning — ideal winter break weather — and a house all to himself and his wonderful girlfriend, who had spent the night with him. His parents were away for the holiday weekend, content with the thought that they were leaving their son in good hands — and truly, Lily Evans’s hands had proved nimble and attentive beyond his wildest imagination, although he intended to leave that particular detail out upon recounting. James had woken up cheery and energised, early as was his wont, and while the prospect of cuddling with said girlfriend was deliciously tempting, he had decided to show himself a worthy boyfriend by making breakfast for the both of them.  So there he was in the kitchen, eggs boiling in a small pan as he set the table with half the contents of the refrigerator — cheese and ham to go with the freshly toasted bread, butter, milk, juice, yogurt — then Summoned his mother’s selection of jams and laid out an assortment of biscuits. He was just warming up the tea kettle when his eye caught Lily leaning against the door jamb, hair adorably dishevelled, dressed in one of his jumpers and little else — if anything — and watching him with a mischievous spark in her gorgeous green eyes.

Read the rest on AO3! Completed, 1.1k.

[nevertheless-moving]

"Fornication," Wit whispered, staring with haunted eyes at nothing. "That's not Rayse at all. He stole - that reproducing bastard. He stole my breaths."

The rage in the generally amicable man's voice was enough to dissuade Kaladin from asking about the bizarre word choice.

Shallan, evidently, did not have that problem.

"Fornication?" she repeated incredulously.

"It's a curse word," Wit said through gritted teeth. "Used to be common, but it's fallen out of favor among shardplanets the last several thousand years for some stupid CHILD CREATING reason."

Wit snarled, pacing the tent furiously.

"Which is a real PLEASURABLE PHYSICAL INTERACTION shame because now i sound really copulatingly stupid swearing with connection based direct translations, but cursing by 'Gods' or the dead or the weather or whatever intense intimacy else this vigorous impregnation planet swears by is NOT as satisfying when i am this LOVEMAKINGLY angry."

Wit kicked a chair, which flew with shocking force, tearing a hole in sturdy canvas siding. He stared at the tear, exhausted, then collapsed, arms wrapping around himself.

"I'm sorry," he whispered to Jasnah, who was approaching cautiously, in full Armour. "I shouldn't have done that. I generally don't have enough of a temper to lose it like that, but...gender neutral attempt at babies. He stole my breaths. I don't even know how much I lost...it will take decades to do an inventory, and even then...there's important secrets I vowed to protect. Lost people I swore to remember. Oaths I can't even properly remember making anymore, but I have to - I..."

Jasnah knelt down, taking Wit in her arms as he wept softly.

"And I can't even coitally curse right anymore," he sobbed.

[burglar-bird]

Fanart of Timothy "Trash" Drake from @batfambrainrotbeloved 's hilarious and amazing fic, "The Drake's Spoiled Brat (I'm sorry dad)." The fic is on AO3, and I highly recommend it!

Timmy gets fluffy, styled hair because you know he has to go to the salon to play his part. No clue if he actually has an earring, but I wouldn't be surprised. 😉

[miraculousfanworks]

Fanfiction Prompt

Chat Noir receives a request from the "make-a-wish" foundation to speak to one of the youngest patients. Chat Noir: Don't worry, dying isn't painful at all! I do it all the time.

Prompt by blueknight

[crash-tube-the-seawing]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 崩坏：星穹铁道 | Honkai: Star Rail (Video Game), My Little Pony Generation 4: Friendship Is Magic (Cartoon 2010) Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Argenti/Boothill (Honkai: Star Rail), Applejack/Rarity (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic), Argenti & Boothill (Honkai: Star Rail) Characters: Boothill (Honkai: Star Rail), Argenti (Honkai: Star Rail), Rarity (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic), Applejack (My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic) Additional Tags: Established Rarity/Applejack, Crack treated (somewhat) seriously, Wormhole Shenanigans, Pining, Boot and Genti get isekai'd into My Little Pony, Genti and Boot have to find a way to get home, Boothill Can't Swear (Honkai: Star Rail), AJ and Rare become wingponies of sorts, Isekai and Transmigration, Possibly OOC, Argenthill and Rarijack are too alike, I had to make them meet, How do you write a Southern accent?, Pining Boothill (Honkai: Star Rail), Crack and Angst, Fluff and Angst Summary:

Still reeling from falling through the wormhole, Boothill and Argenti find themselves in a strange new world. Their forms have changed as well, into what Boothill can only describe as forms of the equine variety, with Argenti sporting a horn in addition to the new form. While exploring this strange land they bump into two locals, who may have the answers to how to get them back.

Here is the Argenthill and Rarijack fic

[gemsandjunk]

the two types of billford content

[sweetteaanddragons]

I have been thinking lately about a universe where Bruce Wayne killed the Joker.

I want to be clear here, since there are so many longstanding debates on this topic: I do not think Bruce Wayne should kill the Joker. I have just been wondering what would happen if the circumstances aligned in such a way that he did.

And to be clear on a related, yet slightly different topic: when I say I have been wondering about what if Bruce Wayne killed the Joker, I do not mean as the Batman. I mean Bruce "Brucie" Wayne.

Maybe it's kind of an accident? Like, he definitely did intend to hit the Joker, but he's Brucie right now, so he's trying not to look like he knows what he's doing while still doing enough damage to keep the Joker from killing someone, and meanwhile the Joker makes just the wrong move and -

And here we are. Brucie just killed the Joker.

Bruce's reaction here is one thing; he has his one rule for a reason, he's just broken it, he's determined to turn himself in -

His family's reaction is a whole different story. How does Cass feel about this?

How does Jason? Bruce has killed the Joker, just like he wanted, but it wasn't for him, not really, and -

And meanwhile, this happens in front of, say, a gala full of people, so now all of Gotham gets to react to it too.

Average Gothamite, seeing the words BRUCE WAYNE, JOKER, and KILLED in the same headline: OH, NO.

Average Gothamite, once they've processed the order those words are actually in: . . . I did not have that on this year's bingo card.

The city's most famous mass murderer has just been publicly killed by the city's biggest employer/philanthropist/source of tabloid harmless nonsense! Three days before Brucie was making tabloid headlines by tripping into a fountain and somehow losing his shirt in the process! Two weeks before, the newspaper was running a retrospective on the Wayne murders and what donation Brucie was making to help the families of victims this year! The article mentioned how one of his adopted sons had also tragically become a murder victim!

Now this has happened, and Bruce is having a breakdown over breaking his one rule, and the rest of Gotham just assumes that this is because poor Brucie thinks this somehow makes him like the man who killed his parents. They send a huge outpouring of support his way. This in no way helps Bruce's actual breakdown.

Ninety percent of Gotham is sure Brucie didn't actually mean to kill the Joker, and pretty much a hundred percent of them support him whether he meant to do it or not. No one wants to have anything to do with prosecuting this mess. Bruce is trying to make it as clear as possible that he will fully cooperate with the justice system and meanwhile an entire gala full of people is suddenly acting like they could in no way have possibly witnessed events that took place ten feet in front of their faces. Did Bruce kill the Joker? Is the officer sure? That doesn't seem like him. Maybe the Joker just tripped on his own. Marble floors, you know. Very slippery.

[hinamie]

mentor

[retiredteabag]

Your tampon string broke

Including: Gojo, Nanami, Choso, Sukuna, Toji, Yuuji, and Megumi

〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰〰・♡・〰

[cinnamorollcrybaby]

The JJK men want a break… part 2

Tags: smau, cursing, crack lmao, the jjk men are groveling, you don’t gaf though, nsfw, mdni

An: Here’s part two… as heavily requested… by over 20 people. You can read part 1 here. Anyways, the alt title to this is “Fuck it. Guess we both ain’t shit.” LOL. THERE WILL NOT BE A PART THREE. THE END.

Incl - Satoru, Suguru, Nanami, Choso, Toji, Sukuna

Tags: @luvsymai @jelliblue @mentallyunpresent @enchantingkitty @lemonlimecrystal-blog @muli-wam

[annabtg]

Iacta Alea Est

a @jilymicrofics production

He is popular. Charismatic. A true leader. His accomplishments are lauded all across the wizarding world; from his duelling prowess to his Transfiguration breakthroughs, he is a man of astuteness and innovation. He strategises politics as skillfully as he does Quidditch, he manoeuvres around public affairs as successfully as he did around Filch in the Hogwarts corridors. People flock to him – they always did at school, and they do even more so now. And he likes to flaunt his power – walk into the Wizengamot with his head held high and his shoulders thrown back, loud voice and sharp tongue on the ready, unfazed by the court’s norms and ethos. But most concerningly, he is a reformer. He wants equal rights for Muggleborns and preaches acceptance for Muggles and Squibs. His son is already following in his footsteps, a talented brat that struts around Hogwarts with the title of the Youngest Quidditch Player of the Century, an uncanny aptitude for duelling even men double his age, and an extremely vocal dislike of the Dark Arts.

Read the rest on AO3! Completed, 744 words.

[loves4ge]

sending them nudes in the middle of an argument !

incl. nanami kento, sukuna ryomen, toji fushiguro

mdni ❌😔

[strange-birb]

Based on og bost by @thethirdtriplet

Order left to right pic 1 lolz

Damian, cass, dick, duke, Tim, Steph :)

[miraculousfanworks]

Fanfiction Prompt

When parisians found out that magic is real, the trend of love charms was re-ignited. Unfortunately one of them actually worked and Adrien is now able to sense the romantic attraction of others towards him. He had not been able to calm down since and had to sneak out of his room at night and transform to get some sleep. However, with Chat Noir making it into teen magazines as one of the most desirable bachelors, he is starting to lose his safe haven.

Prompt by blueknight

[bet-on-me-13]

The Summoner

So! Danny is not the Ghost King.

But he still has a good relationship with a LOT of Powerful and not-so-powerful Ghosts in the Zone. So much so that they have given him their Summoning Circle's with a blanket permission to Summon them any time. Not like they have much else going on...

This all leads to a hilarious situation where Danny can't use his Powers for whatever reason and is forced to Summon his friends for help. In front of a group of Heroes.

He has to explain everything to them, but accidentally convinces them that he has Summoning Magic and the Ghosts are all on his Contract. He also mentions Saving people from Ghosts and the JLA realize that he is a child Hero.

They ask him if he wants to join Young Justice, and Danny hesitantly agrees.

Now Danny is on Young Justice and the entire team thinks that he is a Hero with Ghost Summoning Magic.

And his name isn't Daniel "Commit to the Bit" Fenton for no reason.

[ukiyoebirds]

"Old Friend, I dreamt I saw you last night. But I was mistaken: it was a stranger all along."

TF One has me in a chokehold ( ; . ; ) .

May need to click on the image for better resolution.